#sorry i am having one singular thought all week and its this

[mag200]

he literally looked back because he loved her. she was already dead. she wouldve still been dead even if he hadnt looked back and they'd made it. she was a ghost. she wouldve come back wrong. it's not a happy ending (yes it is). he loved her. he looked back. HE DID NOT FAIL HER!!!!! its not about getting back what you've lost its about saying goodbye. there is no other end to this story. im done.

[euphoricfilter]

like crazy ~ part one

☆ﾟpart one of four

pairing(s): namjoon x reader, seokjin x reader, yoongi x reader, hoseok x reader, jimin x reader, taehyung x reader, jungkook x reader

genre: fluff || smut || angst || non-idol au || reincarnation au || strangers to lovers || established relationships || regency era au || gang au ||

summary: the story of why you loved to dance in the rain.

word count: 14k

tags/ warnings: duke! taehyung, jimin, fluff, so much love, angst, death(s)/implied murder, mentions of blood, mentioned suicide, mentioned puking, friends to lovers, strangers to lovers, smut in the forms of: implied loss of virginity, unprotected sex (don't be stupid, this is fiction), oral (fem receiving), multiple orgasms, creampie, cum play, talks of pregnancy and babies

notes: this mini series is very loosely inspired by an au idea i wrote a while back about an immortal m/c. i'm going to try and keep updates every other week but i am moving home really soon so if there's any change in the schedule then i'll post about it!! and as always, feedback is always encouraged <3

‘like crazy’ mini series masterlist || my main masterlist

🪐 🌠 ∘₊✧─── *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ───✧₊∘ ✧ ˚ 　· 　　 . 💫

“A lot has happened since we last spoke” You look down at the gravestone, moss and mud having found home over unnerving death, “Sorry it took me so long to visit” Maybe it helped that the sun was out, tears that were meant to fall soaked up in golden rays of light that warm your cheeks rather than wet them. 

You place a bouquet of red chrysanthemums before the thick slab of stone, closing your eyes briefly. Not a thought in your mind as you revel in the peace of what was once a roaring home. 

“Now, where should I begin?” 

The day you remembered your first life, it felt as though your world had tilted off its axis. That everything you thought you’d learnt about yourself was nothing more than a singular star in a galaxy that sat in the vast universe. A mere atom in the formula that builds you as a person. 

It was like a never-ending spiral. Little pockets of a past life you were never supposed to know, hidden between rouge pieces of space rock and black holes of a different time. Where one misstep had you slipping down a rabbit hole of the unknown with nothing to grab onto. Spiralling down like you were Alice, except you were far from Wonderland. 

You weren’t even sure if you were in denial, or if it was all a far-fetched dream crafted by a wild imagination. Perhaps it was something more like guilt, because as much as Jimin was most definitely the love of your life; he was simply the love of this life.

Strange, heart-wrenching emotions had weighed on your shoulders as you remembered a past lover, who had held your heart ever so delicately in soft hands. And you’d held his, cradling it to your chest until your hearts had beaten in unison. Where wild fantasies had painted a forever, that was never going to be forever. 

Your skin had crawled as fingertips that no longer exist had danced over your body, and burning lips, kissing you in places that should only be Jimin’s. A touch not that of your lover’s, digging into sacred places, secret places that you had only ever worked up the courage to show Jimin. 

The sudden force of having to re-live grief when you yourself should also be dead had sent you into a frenzy. With too many sleepless nights, and too many harsh words sent Jimin’s way as you tried to navigate so many new stimuli at once. This love for another man was like a phantom hand latching onto your heart and squeezing, pulling, and sinking you further down. Sinking down, down, down until a whirlwind of emotions had flushed over you. Joy. Excitement. Sorrow. Heart-ache. Hatred. Love. Too much love. So much more love. A different sort of love you had never felt. Love love love. 

There were too many secrets. Secrets you didn’t truly understand, a jumble of words that melt into slush and clog your brain, sparking against neurotransmitters and mingling with more information than you knew what to do with. Secrets that go away when Jimin is stood before you, and you’re reminded of who your heart now belongs to. The world finally silent, and hands stop grabbing you, and you can finally breathe again. It was as if Jimin had become a catalyst for your fraying feelings. 

The story of Jimin had bloomed in spring. 

When the sky felt as though it were at the tips of your fingers if you were to reach up high enough. And the world smelt of flowers and herbs that sat on window-sills of rundown houses. Where skin was sun-kissed, tender and pink on the back of your neck. And all the evils of the world were taking a nap for the afternoon with the cats that lounged in the shade under trees. 

“Excuse me”

You perk up, squinting when the sun hits your eyes. 

The memory of your first encounter with Jimin will always be one you find yourself going back to. Vivid enough that when you dream of this day, you’re often tempted to reach out and touch him as if he were really there. 

His name on the tip of your tongue, tickling the back of your throat and mind, though nothing comes out as the scene replays itself for the thousandth time. 

It’s like a well-practised play, where you pose as the main cast while simultaneously being the audience. (Maybe it was more of a tragedy, a shame when you know how this one ended.) A little jarring that you have no control over your own body, lips moulding around words so many times you could recite the first conversation the both of you had over and over again. 

Sickly regret holding you in its palms, because there are so many more things you want to tell Jimin, words that he’ll never get to hear. 

It mustn’t have been very long after midday when you’d met. Sweat tickling the back of your neck and untamed grass pocking at your ankles and between bare toes. 

The air smelt of burning wood, crackling fire nothing but a whisper in the wind as footsteps crunch over gravel, and children thump into the tall grass and crush delicate flowers under the weight of their tiny bodies. 

The dress you were sewing is dropped into your lap in favour of cupping your hands around your eyes to see the face of your visitor. Your cheeks dusting the lightest shade of pink when you finally get a look at his face. 

You knew of Jimin, as did most on your estate. The other seamstresses never knew when to close their mouths, always tittering away about everyone and everything that lived in the area. Mindless gossip that you always found yourself turning away from when their giggles would get too loud, or opinions too crude for your liking. 

Jimin had become somewhat of an enigma since turning into an adult. Names were thrown around like he weren’t ever to hear them; though you know his mother works in the building next door. Sure to have heard what her friends had been saying about her son behind her back. How much of a shame it is that he has such a nice face but no money. That no woman would ever want to settle for a man with nothing to his name, even if their babies were to be beautiful. 

Or how their daughters had wandered into the city and found wealthy bachelors, who bought them dresses lined with thread made of gold, and jewellery that weigh down their necks. Who eat like royals, and prance around well-kept gardens into their husbands’ arms. 

Thoughts ever so shallow you never found yourself stooping to their level when they’d nudge you for your opinion. The bitter remark that their children had abandoned them had always clung to your lips, because surely if they cared they would have lifted their parents out of commoner status and housed them in luxury. 

The rumours of Jimin’s beauty were true, that much you now knew. Whatever child-like innocence you had left inside of you dubbing him as something akin to a garden fairy; just as you imagined them when you were young. 

Not quite dainty, yet not thick muscle, something a little softer around the edges. And with his overgrown hair haloed by the sun as he takes a step to the side, blanketing you in shade, you think he looks like a dream. 

“Yes?” your head tilts, gaze flitting to the scarce bouquet that he holds. Tips of his fingers evidence that he’d dug them up himself, wet soil clinging to his skin and boots; just as rough and old as the rest of his clothes. Though really you find you have no place to judge when you, yourself are dressed no better than him. 

“These are for you” He thrusts the flowers into your face, entirely too eager as dirt falls into your lap, though you find yourself laughing. Uncaring that your mother’s dress bears the brunt of his enthusiasm. 

You clear your throat when he avoids your eyes, “From you?” 

And he nods, watching from the corner of his eye as you take them in gentle hands as not to let any of the smaller flowers fall out of place. You lay them delicately over your lap, feeling around the grass for your thread. 

You snap it with your teeth, tying the stems of the flowers together so you wouldn’t lose any of them. A pot already in mind that you keep beside your mattress in the bedroom. Dust had collected around the rim, and lime scale clung to the insides, though you think the flowers would look lovely beside you as you slept. 

“And–” he rubs his hands over his pants, bottom lip tucked between his teeth, “And this” He pulls a piece of paper from his pocket. 

The tips of your fingers brush against one another as you take it from him. Curiosity wins over the heated flush that threatens to dust over your cheeks at the accidental contact. 

‘I think you’re pretty’ 

“Would you like to join me?” you smile, patting the space beside you, Jimin’s own lips curling up at the corners. 

“I’m Jimin” 

And you refrain from telling him you know. Because the Jimin you knew was the one that had been tossed from mouth to mouth, built on flimsy lies and stupid expectations. Entirely built by rotten imaginations and women who had nothing better to do than chatter about other people’s lives when their own was crumbling just as much. 

“Y/n” you giggle, outstretching your hand for him to shake. 

Jimin’s eyes curl into little crescents as he smiles, a laugh bubbling up his throat “Nice to meet you, Y/n” 

“Nice to meet you” You nod, “Oh! And, I think you’re pretty too” 

“Do you think I can take you on a date? Tomorrow?” he turns to you, and you blink up at him. 

“So soon?” 

“Too soon?” he winces. 

The corners of your lips turn upwards, busying yourself with finishing mending your mother’s dress, “No, I quite like how straight to the point you are” 

Jimin’s chest deflates as he sighs, “I thought it might have scared you a little” he admits. 

You hum, “No one’s ever asked me on a date before” you admit. 

A wave of ease falls over the both of you, a unanimous understanding that there weren’t any expectations between the two of you. That as much as love was thrown onto the table, it didn’t have to be what the two of you got out of this. 

Friendship, when you’re alone, is just as precious as a lover. Another human being with very human emotions and morals that match yours is just as special as something a little more than platonic. 

“No way” he laughs, shoulder knocking against yours, you bite back a smile, “A girl as pretty as you?” 

“Mmhmm” 

“Then it’d be an honour to be the first” feeling bold, Jimin’s arm slips across your shoulders, “And hopefully the last”

“Ah is that so?” you drop the dress onto the grass beside you, pushing yourself to sit on your heels as you turn to face Jimin. 

He nods, eyes flicking from your own to your lips, then back up again. Perhaps only mapping out your face into his mind, carving out every little crevice that makes you, and burning it into his brain. Or maybe it’s something a little less innocent. 

You lean forward, a chaste kiss pressed to Jimin’s cheek before you pull back; a shy smile mirroring his, flushed cheeks probably matching his too. Though you find yourself liking the feeling, something ever so foreign yet welcome, you can’t help the airy laugh that spills from your lungs. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

It had been the incessant tapping at your window that had woken you up like a little bird was pecking at the old glass. Understandably, fear had settled in your heart, it wasn’t often you were woken up in the middle of the night like this. 

The floorboards creaked under the weight of your body as you slipped off your mattress, socked feet barely making a sound as you plan an easy escape without your uninvited visitor knowing you were going to find your mother. 

You almost trip over your own feet when the tapping stops, Jimin calling out your name. 

You scuttle over to your window, tugging your curtains open, “What are you doing here so late?” you whisper when you unlatch the window, pushing it open. 

“I forgot to give you this” he raises his arm, a singular sunflower clasped between his fingers. 

“You came all the way here to give me this?” you ask, baffled. 

“Yes, I forgot to pick you a bouquet before our date this afternoon” he nods, “That…and I just missed you” 

“Would you like to come in?” you take a step away from your window. 

You see the unfiltered surprise on his face, “Too soon?” 

He shakes his head, “I just wasn’t expecting it is all” 

You pluck the sunflower from between his fingers, turning to place it in the vase with the other flowers he’d gifted you over the last week. 

You turn back to Jimin as his boots thump against the floor, he kicks them off, shuffling in one spot as you take a seat on your mattress. 

“Come here” you hide your smile, biting your bottom lip. He’s ever so careful as he takes a seat beside you. The both of you fall onto your backs like you often did in the grass at the park. 

Soft silver moonlight spills into the room from the open curtains, cool night air washing over the both of you as you stare at the ceiling. 

“I really like spending time with you” Jimin breaks the silence, though his gaze remains trained on one spot of your roof. 

“I really like spending time with you, too” You tilt your head to look at him, unexplainable happiness filling your body until you felt like bursting. 

He hums, next words barely above a whisper. “I hope we can be together for a long time” 

“I would like that” 

Jimin turns his head to face you, the softest smile on his face, “I’m glad” 

 Love with Jimin was pure. The both of you were young enough that it didn’t matter if it were rough around the edges, imperfect; though you wouldn’t have changed it for the world. It wasn’t hard to fall in love. Not when it was Jimin.

For every date he took you on, he would spend hours in the park picking flowers for you. 

His mother had always adored them and could talk about anything botanical for hours. She knew all their meanings and all their worth. Her love for one of the world’s tiny treasures brushing off on Jimin growing up. Over the years the reason for his love had changed, something special to his mother was now something special to him. 

Because flowers now reminded Jimin of you. Where soft petals between the tips of his fingers felt like your skin under his hands, always reaching out for you, holding any part of you he could. How the world around you smelt of flowers as he braided them into your hair or you made promise rings with wilting stems that needed a little bit of love; a new life, a new purpose. 

And of course, Jimin had heard all about the men in the city who bought acres of land for their lovers. Gardens tended to with warm hands but barely there love. And Jimin’s dream was to spend afternoons in a garden, your knees brushing as he plants flower beds and vegetables. So he could wake you up each morning with a new bouquet and a letter as to why he loves you so much. 

“What’s this one?” you tuck Jimin’s hair behind his ear, pressing a kiss to his nose. 

“A red chrysanthemum” He tilts your face, thumb caressing the skin behind your ear. 

“Yeah?” you breathe, eyelashes brushing against your cheeks as his lips barely brush over your own, and Jimin hums. 

You smile into the kiss, “And what do red chrysanthemums mean?” you whisper, arms wrapping around his shoulders. 

“I love you” 

You pull back, eyes widening a fraction. Three words that felt like they should be whispered, a secret that the two of you shared but never spoke about. You knew you loved Jimin in some capacity, you weren’t stupid. And you knew he liked you back, he’d made that known; and yet those three words had you feeling as though love was the only emotion that mattered. That the only thing you could ever do was love Jimin.

“Too soon?” he smiles, thumb running over your bottom lip. 

You shake your head, “No, not at all” 

“This is for you too then” His free hand slips into his pocket. Piece of paper tucked between two fingers, he drops it into your awaiting palm. 

‘I love you ♡” 

Young love didn’t have to be rushed. You didn’t have to stagger after Jimin as he pulled you along, or him chase after you as you sped ahead. It could be late-night talking about all the seemingly insignificant things in life. How hard growing up was or the insane expectations for success that neither of you had a chance of grasping. 

Marriage didn’t have to be your only reason. Not when Jimin had become many of the reasons you liked waking up in the morning, or making lunch for the both of you to share on scarce breaks at work. 

It could be slow dancing in the moonlight, as Jimin hums and crickets chirp. Or afternoons spent lounging in the sun with pinkies intertwined and breaths in sync. Or, now whispered ‘I love yous’ melting into soft kisses to cheeks and lips and noses. Or pink flushed cheeks and smiles that hurt your face, the good kind of hurt that makes you giggle and want one more gentle press of his lips to your own. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You dip your fingers into the shallow edge of the lake, “It’s pretty cold” 

You peek over your shoulder as Jimin pulls his shirt over his head, lithe muscles flexing under the motions of his movements. Every sharp line and soft ridge of his body was illuminated by the silver light of the moon. 

“Guess we better warm up then” he grins, eyes raking down your body. They then linger on your face, and it’s not often you wonder what Jimin’s thinking. He usually speaks his mind, clingy shyness about his feeling for you never holding him back when it came to his thoughts. 

You laugh, “Perv” your own shirt haphazardly shucked off your body, thrown into a pile with the rest of Jimin’s clothes. 

His arm slips over your waist as you kick your panties off, goosebumps prickling the skin of your arms as your boyfriend takes a step into the lake. 

His chest opens as the initial shock of the cold crawls up his spine. Jimin watches you fidget, arms wrapped around your bare breasts, “Come on, baby” he reaches a hand out for you, walking further until he’s waist-deep in the water. 

An easy smile is on his face as he beckons you over, wading closer to you when you work up the courage to slink into the water. Your breath hitches as you take Jimin’s hand, legs wrapping around his waist. He throws your arms around his shoulders, murky water rippling around the both of you as he spins you around. Your bare chest pushes up against Jimin’s as you pull him closer, your body easing a little at the extra heat. 

“You’re pretty” he murmurs, fingers digging into the meat of your thighs, hoisting you up a little higher. 

You push his hair from his forehead, lips lingering over warm skin when you lean down to press a kiss over his hairline; your hands cupping his cheeks, eyes flickering across his face. You weren’t sure how to explain how you felt, Jimin had always been better at words than you had been. 

It’s just, Jimin in the moonlight always felt right. Because for once the world fell silent, it felt like it finally belonged to just you and him. He looked ever so pretty dusted in silver, honeyed skin kissed by the wonders of the sky. Blemishes nothing but pretty places to kiss, each moment your lips touch his skin another reason for you to wonder how you even ended up here. 

“I love you” you whisper.

But that never felt like enough. Three frail words that you utter over and over again, that should really lose their meaning over time, are the only words that ever seem to come to mind when it’s Jimin. Nothing fancy. Nothing poetic. Nothing that’s more than an ‘I love you’ because no matter how many times you seemed to say it, the weight of your words is always understood by Jimin.  

And he laughs, “How abrupt of you” 

You bite back a smile, “Sorry, it just came out” 

“I might love you more, you know” His eyes close. 

You press a kiss over his eyelids, “I think that’s impossible”  

He hums, “I don’t” 

He peeks an eye open, smiling when he sees the frown on your face. 

“Every breath I take, and for every beat of my fragile heart, I will love you. Until the day I lay on my deathbed, and we must part ways, my love will be yours.” his eyes meet your own, “Though I know we’ll meet in the sky, and I’ll hand you my heart once more” 

“And I’ll hand you mine” Your eyes search his, nails digging into the skin of his shoulders. 

“I’m glad, my love. And I’ll cherish it for as long as you’ll allow me” 

“Forever.” you say, wondering if his eyes really held galaxies or if they simply reflected the sky, “It’ll be yours forever” 

“Then I have something to tell you” 

Your eyebrows crease, and a strange sense of dread and excitement mixes inside of you. And you aren’t sure if you’re jittery from the cold or nerves or fear. 

“What is it?” you urge. 

Jimin swallows, hands travelling over your bare back and down your waist, “I’ve put down two gold coins for that house we had been talking about” 

Your chest deflates, lungs wringing themselves out of all the air you had until you’re laughing. Almost falling backwards into the water if Jimin hadn’t pulled you closer to his body. 

“Have you really?” you breathe, hand tangling into the hair on the back of his head, “Park Jimin, don’t lie to me” 

He smiles, chest shaking with his own breathy laughter, “Never, my love. Truly it is going to be ours” 

You shake your head, “How did you find the money for it” 

“You know I have been working double shifts as of late” he hums, wet hands pushing your hair from your face, eager to see your blooming happiness. 

“Yes, but I thought it was for your mother” 

“She earns enough to feed herself, and I wanted a place of our own. And I know how much we’ve both dreamed of this moment, I had to do it” 

“You’re perfect, you know that?” your lips mould into his, a moan of appreciation swallowed as you tilt your head; tongue poking at the seam of his lips. 

“I do now” he huffs, pulling you in for another kiss by the back of your neck. 

“We’re really going to have a home” 

“Yes” he laughs, “Forever ours” 

“I can’t believe it” you whisper, “Pinch me so I know it is real” 

A moan gets caught in the back of your throat as Jimin’s teeth nip at the tender skin behind your ear, plush lips kissing over your skin, saliva slicked and heated. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You think you can find your and Jimin’s love in the little wonders of the world. Because as much as he wanted to hand you the universe, both of you knew that was impossible. That your love was tucked away, safer when hidden in dreams of a shared future. Tucked away in a home that was now yours forever, because neither of you had plans of going anywhere. 

As selfish as it may seem, you’d stolen spring to be your own. You’d met in the spring and found a place for yourselves as flowers bloomed. You were Jimin’s spring flower and he was the sun and the moon and all the pretty things in between. 

It wasn’t hard to fall into a routine, your lives were like clockwork, never stopping. It had always been that way, except now you’d stay within the precious walls of your home, and Jimin would return to you before the sun slipped behind the horizon and dinner was finished cooking on the fire. 

Most mornings the both of you would wake up before sunrise, and you’d eat near-stale bread on the chairs Jimin had made outside the front door. Where once or twice a butterfly had come to kiss your nose in good morning, and then Jimin would kiss the same place over and over until you’re both giggling like it was the first time you’d kissed. 

And for the days he slipped out of the house before you woke, he would leave little letters around the house for you to find throughout the day. 

‘Last night I saw a star as you slept, and it reminded me of your eyes. Briefly, I thought to wake you but after seeing you so at peace, I decided to join you instead ♡’  

He’d always had a secret liking towards poetry and found himself sitting with a quill and paper as the moon sat in the sky, thinking of poems about you. And only the ones that made him smile, and made his heart jump up and down inside his chest did he ever leave on his pillow for you to wake up to the next morning. 

You’d clean the floors between sewing as Jimin worked as a blacksmith, lithe frame bulking up over the last couple of months. And he would make sure to leave you a note before leaving the house, with every little thing he would find that he loved about you. 

‘Today’s reason is your smile ♡’ 

Evenings were your favourite, as were Jimin’s. Both your bodies ease into one another’s as you sit on worn-down cushions while playing checkers that your father had carved for you as a child. 

Or you’d simply lay your head over Jimin’s thigh as he sings for you under the stars. Bellies almost full and hearts the most content as the universe writes your love in shooting stars, its ink the soft glow of the moon. 

“I have a surprise for you next week, so take the day off” Jimin’s fingers rake through your hair, tucking it ever so delicately behind your ear. 

You peel your eyes open, “And what about your own work?” 

“I have already asked for a day away, no problem” He smiles down at you. 

“What sort of surprise is it?” your voice comes out barely above a whisper, carried by the wind to Jimin’s ears, who hums. 

He runs his thumb over his bottom lip, “I mustn’t say, it will ruin it” 

“But I’ll be curious” You jab a finger into his stomach, lips curling into a smile when he leans down to capture your lips. 

“Poor thing” he whispers, stealing another kiss. 

‘A clue to your surprise: It reminds me of you ♡’ 

“I still don’t know what it is” You slide Jimin’s most recent note across the table, and he shrugs. 

“Your final clue” He hands you another piece of paper. 

‘Think of when we first met’  

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this excited” Jimin laughs, arm slung over your shoulders. 

You skip ahead a little, walking backwards as you smile over at Jimin who takes one of your hands, helping you twirl as if you were a princess and he was the prince. You’d spent every night sewing a new dress with leftover fabric from the tavern; a special occasion called for a special outfit.  

And Jimin had smiled and laughed so much he’d almost fallen off the back of his chair as you’d spun for him. He’d called you utterly beautiful and then tugged you over his lap for a kiss, maybe two. 

“Of course, I’m excited. I’ve been eager to know what your surprise is” 

“Happiness looks good on you, my love” Jimin stops walking, pulling you to his chest. 

“Then I must look good all the time, with you around” 

“Where do you learn these things” His hand covers his mouth, a lame attempt at covering his smile. 

“You” 

Jimin raises his eyebrows, astounded, “When have I ever been cheesy?” 

“All the time. I’ll show you when we get home, I have all those letters you’ve left me” 

“You kept all those?” he gapes, footsteps falling in time with your own as you both start wandering back down the gravel path. 

“Of course. I still have the first ever one you gave me, and then all the ones that came after that” 

You bite your bottom lip, willing yourself not to laugh when you catch sight of Jimin’s rose-dusted cheeks. 

“Then you may think I’m extra cheesy today” he announces, fingers interlacing with your own. 

“Is that so?” you hum, shoulder knocking against his arm. 

Jimin turns to you, “Do you trust me?” 

You blink. 

“Of course” 

“Then please close your eyes” 

“Right now?” your head tilts, eyes squinting to gauge how far away the end of the pathway is, “It doesn’t seem like we’re anywhere that a surprise could be” 

“We are” he turns to you, “It won’t be a surprise if you keep looking though” 

You nod, eyes narrowing; sceptical. 

“If this is where you secretly murder me then I swear on my grave I will come back from the dead Park Jimin” 

He laughs, “It would be impossible to live in a world without you, I wouldn’t dare lay a hand on you if it weren’t for your own pleasure” 

You bring your hands to cover your eyes, back straightening when Jimin takes hold of your arm, turning you in the direction of the forest. 

“Careful, the path is uneven this way” He pulls you further under the blanket of trees. 

“Are we almost there” you stumble, amused laugh shaking your shoulders as Jimin’s other hand falls onto your waist to keep you steady. 

“Almost” 

The both of you stumble to a stop, your eyes squeezing shut behind your hands as you wander into the sun, out of the shade. 

“Are you ready?” 

And you hear the unease in his voice, a week of pressure building up. Bubbling until it’s now fizzling out of him in nervous rivulets, hands clammy as they run up and down your arms. His feet shuffle against crunchy grass, and this might be the most jittery you’ve ever seen Jimin. 

“Yes,” you tell him, keeping your eyes closed as you take hold of his hands, squeezing his fingers between your own. Jimin swallows, Adams's apple bobbing under the weight of it. 

His eyes wander over your face, “May I kiss you?” 

The corner of your lips curl up at that, “Yes” you nod, leaning into his touch when he cups your cheeks. 

The tension in both your shoulders releases as your lips mould together, ever so slowly, neither of you rushing as Jimin’s tongue teases into your mouth. He laps up every little noise that slips off your tongue, sweet like nectar. 

Your eyes slip open, entirely focused on Jimin’s. “I really hope you like it” He keeps your focus on him, foreheads still touching, noses knocking against one another. 

“May I be honest with you?” 

And he hums, “Yes, of course” 

“If it’s from you, then I will always love it” 

“That seems a little extreme” he laughs, though unease still chews away at his mind. 

“I don’t think so. Surely you would like anything I gifted you” 

He nods, “Of course, I would” 

“Then it’s no different for me, so please don’t worry” you whisper, eyes slipping closed once more as you press a featherlight kiss to his plush lips. 

“Keep your eyes closed for a moment” he whispers back, and you hum. 

Jimin’s hands fall away from your body, shadow slipping away from behind your eyelids as he steps away from you. 

“Open them” 

And you do. 

“Oh Jimin” you whisper, a twitch of your lip the first sign of a smile. 

As far as you can see, there are just flowers. The most vibrant you have ever seen, almost glowing under the warm light of the sun. For all the flowers Jimin had given you over the years, you think there must be every colour he’d ever thought to bring you; all swaying in tandem as if it were the most beautiful ocean. 

The field stretches until it meets the sky, land completely hidden by a blanket of wildflowers. 

You don’t know where to look, so many places to look but only two eyes. Your head is pulled in every which direction, mouth falling open in awe. 

“Where did you find this place?” your voice comes out breathless, gaze only briefly meeting Jimin’s before you’re drawn back to acres of untouched land. A whole ecosystem thriving on its own, untampered with by human life. 

“On the way back from a job. It reminded me of you, and I knew I had to bring you here” he steps closer to you, fingers brushing against your own. 

You turn to face Jimin, “It’s the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen. Thank you for sharing it with me” 

You slip your fingers through Jimin’s, “Would you like to dance with me?” 

“Right here?” his eyes widen. 

You nod, tugging him towards the sea of flowers, “Yes” 

“But we have no music” his resistance nothing more than a show as he makes no move to stop you. 

Wild grass tickles both your ankles, delicate petals of smaller flowers caressing your bare legs as you hike your dress up. 

“That doesn’t matter” you laugh, pulling him further and further until overgrown flowers dust over your waist like gentle fingers, and a butterflies’ wings tickle your cheek. 

Jimin watches as you twirl, hands outstretched for him to come closer. Your body knocks into his as he pulls you into his chest. Both of you fall in sync, as curious hands wander over arms and backs, down to waists and hips. 

You flinch when something wet hits your nose, Jimin turning his face to the sky. 

“It looks like it’s about to rain,” he says, and you tilt your head to look, “Perhaps we should go home” 

You shake your head, “But we only just got here” 

“But the rain, my love” he takes your hands, taking a step back, though your feet stay planted in their spot. 

“A little bit of rain never hurt anyone” You pull him back into your body, eyes squeezing shut as a raindrop collides with your lashes. 

The both of you are washed in a gust of shade, the sun hidden behind dark clouds that bleed into the horizon. 

“Won’t you dance with me?” you look up at Jimin, clothes starting to mould into your skin as the sky rains more unshed tears. 

“I suppose” he grins, arm falling around your waist. 

Your hair clings to your foreheads, sodden leaves wetly slapping against your arms and legs. Rouge petals that had plans of rotting on the soil now hanging on to your dress and Jimin’s pants. 

Your dress doesn’t fan out like a royal’s would when Jimin spins you, neither is he really dressed like a prince but the both of you feel as though you could be of that status in that moment. 

Your eyes fall shut, smile never leaving your face. It’s as though your body evaporates, that the world around you fizzles upwards in little bubbles and you follow their lead. Chasing after the light that shines down on you like a beacon. 

Something strange tugs at your heart, sinking you further and further into the darkness as you kick upwards until you’re spinning and the world is spinning with you. And the darkness feels all too familiar, your footsteps practised perfectly as if a routine. 

Hands roam your body. Both yours and his laughter muffled underwater, a whisp of a soul slipping through your fingers when you turn towards the deep timbre of another voice, a voice far deeper than Jimin’s. His laugh vibrates in your chest as phantom hands graze against your naked skin. And he’s calling your name, your mouth opening to call back except nothing but air puffs past your lips; air bubbles caressing your cheeks as they float upwards. 

Your feet move on their own without much thought as you turn in every which direction, only to ever be met by darkness; feet caught in quicksand that has you sinking further away from the light. 

There’s something on the tips of your fingers as you reach out and an awful pressure squeezes at your chest and the echo– the echo of a voice you’ve heard before. Everything is awfully jumbled, words shoved down your throat, acidic in your stomach– poison as it absorbs into your bloodstream. 

You stumble over your feet chasing after where the stranger’s voice had come from and suddenly your eyes are open as you collide with the floor. Brain rattling within the confines of your skull and your whole world shakes a along with you. 

Jimin’s arms cage your head, chest heaving as he holds himself up over your body. 

You feel puddles of water and sodden soil soak into the back of your dress as you sink further into the ground. 

“Sorry” he whispers, droplets of water from his hair falling onto your cheeks. 

“It’s okay, I forgot where I was for a moment” you admit, a smile pulling at the corner of your lips. 

“I could tell” he laughs, falling back onto his heels. 

Jimin tugs you up by your arms, pushing your wet hair out of your face. 

“Maybe we should go home” he murmurs, “I’d hate to have another accident” 

You nod,  “I think that’s a good idea”

“Let’s go home, my love” he pushes himself to stand, and you glance down at your hands. 

“Did you hear another man’s voice?” you blink away the rain from your lashes, Jimin’s eyebrows furrowing. 

“No? It’s only the two of us here” he takes your hands, helping you up, “Did you hear someone?” 

You shake your head, “No, it must have been something else” 

“You know” Jimin starts as you trek out of the flowers, “I’ve never met anyone that loves dancing in the rain as much as you” 

“I can’t explain the feeling” You turn to him, the smallest of smiles on your face. 

“Then should we dance every time it rains?” 

“I always dance when it rains” You pull him closer to your side, a futile attempt to steal some of his body heat. 

“Yes, but I always watch. Maybe I’ll join you from now on” 

“I would like that” you hum. 

And that should have been the end of it. A conversation left in the past where its only leeway into your future is Jimin joining you the next time it decides to rain. Except, you couldn’t stop thinking about it. 

It was rotten how for those few moments the world hadn’t been yours, and Jimin hadn’t been Jimin, and you hadn’t been you. Or that the other voice that had definitely been in your head, a whisper in your ear, an echo on the other side of the dark plane. A siren’s song pulling you further into your own demise, forbidden land you should have never passed over. 

It shouldn’t have been anything more than how much you truly loved dancing in the rain, where it was just something you had always loved and always done without thinking much about it. 

You turn your head to look at Jimin who lay beside you, finally asleep after the both of you had taken a bath. So at peace with himself and the world, as the weight of emotions, you’re unfamiliar with breathe down the back of your neck and you lay awake. 

It’s when you close your eyes, you start to fall. And the eyes that meet yours when you open them aren’t Jimin’s. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

For every life you lived after this one, the love you had here will cling onto you forever, sticky like you’d dipped your fingers in molasses. And maybe it’s because this had been the first time you’d learnt what love truly was, or maybe Taehyung had carved such a large hole in your heart that only he could ever truly fill. So even in life after him, he continues to burrow inside of you as his soul finally rests. 

Pure love was an addicting feeling. And maybe Taehyung had made you greedy, grabbing onto such a wonderful feeling over and over until it destroyed you. It wasn’t fair to blame him, but surely your greed had stemmed from somewhere.

And love could only ever be as magical as you’d imagined it if it begins with Taehyung. 

And so, the story of your first life, and therefore your first love starts with Kim Taehyung. 

Taehyung and Jimin had been the most similar of your loves. Both of them had always liked the more delicate things in life. 

Taehyung liked to read how whimsical the ocean was, white seafoam as gentle as clouds, and waves that caressed ankles that wandered the shore. Or how the stars always seemed that little bit brighter when you were in love, the universe shining its approval of something so perfect. He liked the idea of faeries that danced under the light of the moon, or reading forbidden love stories and poems that hurt his heart. Only to be mended with stories of truer love and lifetimes dedicated to another being. 

Taehyung’s sole purpose in life was to become a duke and run the estate after his father passed. Except he had never liked to be shoved into a mould, crafted by hands that had no care, rough as they shaped him. He despised the fact his life was gifted to him just so he could be chained to a role he had no purpose of fulfilling. 

His spirit had always been that of a wild bird, curious about things he had no business knowing, and wanting to wander where forbidden. 

He loved the freedom that birds had, how beautiful their feathers were, gliding through the sky without a care in the world. They had something he didn’t, and maybe his admiration had stemmed from some weird sense of jealousy. But, that never stopped the look of pure joy on his face whenever he caught a glimpse of a dove dancing on the waves of the wind. 

One of Taehyung’s hobbies had become complaining about his classes. The both of you giggled under one of the trees outside his window, shoulders knocking against each other’s as he told you stories of how his politics tutor was surely a witch, and there was no doubt in his mind that his literature teacher was a ghoul. 

The world felt as though it were crumbling at his feet on the days the two of you couldn’t meet. And so, he’d send you letters in secret, asking to meet at the front gate of the estate; where he’d hand you flowers through the bars, or kiss the back of your hand, only to beckon you closer when that doesn’t feel like enough. His plush lips warming your cheeks until he finds your lips and the both of you are melting into cold metal bars, the shyest smiles on both your faces when a maid catches the both of you. 

Most days were spent in the garden, or the drawing room where the both of you could talk for hours. You liked flicking through catalogues of dresses for the coming seasons, always asking Taehyung what he thought. Wondering if he’d like a new broach for his jackets, or if a new waistcoat would suit him. How wonderful the both of you would look matching, with a handkerchief you’d embroidered for him sat in his breast pocket– every gentle prick of the needle through fabric and each delicate line of tread, laced with love that lays beside his gently beating heart. 

Taehyung liked to recount all the things he adored about love, reciting poems and lines of novels he’d read before bed, and then telling you everything he adored about you. Because ‘love’ and ‘you’ should always fall in the same sentence in his eyes. Love would never truly be ‘love’ if you weren’t in the picture. Your silhouette was painted within each frame of his life, tucked in corners of the canvas or slipped far within his heart and mind. 

Taehyung and love were perhaps a synonym of one another. 

He was the epitome of love. 

All things romance and passion, and all things special between two people that have you shy and kicking your feet. Every moment feels like the long-awaited kiss after chapters of build-up and tension, where you have to look away from the book for a brief moment to recollect your thoughts and then bite your nails to hide a smile. 

If you had to describe Taehyung in one word, you think you’ll always gravitate towards eccentric. 

“I think the reason I was born, was to love you” he’d told you one evening, the stars like a halo around his head as he’d taken your hands into his own. 

You hadn’t known what to say, the corners of your lips quirking up at the sides because, of course, he’d utter such sweet words while the both of you laze in the gardens. Not quite ready to part ways just yet. Even if your carriage had been sat outside the house for over an hour, and your supper was probably sat on the table at home. 

“What a sorry reason to be born” you’d whispered back. 

“I don’t think so. The opposite, in fact” he tugs you a little across the grass, closer between his legs, “What is the point of life if it isn’t for unconditional love? And a mind that functions with the sole purpose of loving another?” 

Maybe it was that moment that you realised you loved love. That you loved loving Taehyung and you loved that he loved you just as much as you loved him, if not more. 

“Then, you’re my reason for living” It had fallen off your tongue quicker than you had thought to catch it. Though the smile that had stretched onto Taehyung’s face is one that will forever be etched into your mind, it had been innocent, content. 

You’d seen him smile so many times and yet, something had shifted in your mind, any qualms you had about letting go and succumbing to the purest form of adoration had fizzled out in both your hands. 

Because life wasn’t so bad when you had someone to love. 

“Just as you are my reason to live” he says. 

“I hope the both of us live forever so I never forget this feeling” you’d interlaced your fingers, cheeks flushing the lightest pink that’s veiled by the silver moonlight. Though he probably feels how warm you are when he cups your face, pressing a kiss over the tip of your nose. 

“Forever?” he hums, “Even if you were to forget, I would remind you over and over for as long as we’re together, and every life after that” 

“I’ll remind you too then” you promise, though Taehyung laughs, chest vibrating under the weight of his voice. 

“I could never forget, not when it comes to you, my love” 

─── �� ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

You don’t remember when you’d met Taehyung, you think he’d always just been there. 

Perhaps the both of you had snuck out of a ball back in the day, two rowdy children giggling on the balcony as you whispered about guests. Which ones you liked, or the ones your mothers’ would mutter about under their breath. The both of you had done it so many times that it would be fitting for your first encounter. A habit the both of you would keep up as you grew older as well. 

Or maybe the both of you had camped out under the tables while your mothers flitted from group to group, and you’d stolen cakes from plates and perfectly cut sandwiches from unattended trays. Where you’d exchange slices of tomato for his pieces of cucumber, and you’d both share squares of cake from one fork. 

Friends from childhood had started bleeding into something a little more as the two of you grew and realized that maybe friendship wasn’t enough for either of you. And maybe that had been the little seedling from where your never-ending greed stemmed from. A constant feral need for constant love that was depicted in careful strokes of paintings and well-thought-out words bled onto a page with dark ink. 

Taehyung had known early on that it was always going to be you he married. There was no doubt in his mind that you were going to wed. It was not often he put his foot down when it came to the choices made for him in life, and making it a point he had no interest in any other woman than you, had always been a point he’d made extremely clear. 

Marriage hadn’t been something you’d put much thought into until Taehyung would bring it up as you drank tea together of an afternoon. And after the little seed of possibility had been planted in your mind, you knew you wanted to marry Taehyung. 

And you’d never second-guessed yourself, because if it was going to be anyone, then it was going to be your best friend. 

“If I were to wear a white dress, would you wear a white suit?” you lay the magazine over your chest. Taehyung pushes his glasses higher on the bridge of his nose when he tilts his head down to look at you; head resting over his thigh. 

“If that is what you want” he hums, “White flowers may be too much, so let’s add colour” 

You run a finger over your bottom lip, “Purple?” 

“Of course” he nods, “I’ll braid them into your hair too” his fingers tickle over your hairline. 

You push yourself to sit up on your elbows, “I think it’s bad luck if the groom sees the bride in her dress on the morning of the wedding” 

Taehyung runs his thumb over his bottom lip, “To hell with tradition” 

“Your mother isn’t going to be very happy” you smile, “All she ever talks about is the perfect wedding” 

Taehyung smiles, “Yes, but it isn’t her wedding. I think I’d be beyond miserable if we weren’t to see each other, I must tell you how beautiful you look before we meet at the end of the alter” 

“It would only be a few hours” you press, eyebrows raising. 

“A few hours too many. Who is supposed to help me with my tie if not you?” 

You fully sit up now, “You’d have a maid or two aiding you” 

Taehyung frowns, whatever paperwork he was reading long forgotten on the couch as he tugs your legs over his thighs, fingers dancing over the bare skin covered by your skirt. 

“But they don’t do it as you do, and I have to look my best the day we tie souls and vow to be lovers for the rest of our time alive. It’s an important day” 

“I suppose you’re right” you hum, brushing his hair from his forehead, “I too, would be lonely if we were to part on such a joyous day” 

It hadn’t been long after the both of you had entered adulthood that Taehyung’s father had died, and only a few months after that the two of you had gotten married. 

You’d worried for Taehyung, knowing that even though his relationship with his father had never been the best, at least a small part of him should have been sad that his soul had left to rest. But no matter how much you lightly prodded, and made sure to ask if he were okay, Taehyung never shed a tear. 

He never truly found a way to articulate his feelings; losing someone he never saw as a father left the smallest hole in his heart. A pinprick, because Taehyung wasn’t heartless and knew the old man had brought him into this world, something he will forever be grateful for– but that was it. 

For the thousands of days you and Taehyung had spent together, the day he had proposed would be your second favourite of them all. He hadn’t made it extravagant, nor did he make it a huge point by proposing at a large gathering. He knew you despised those sorts of events, so he had asked you to be his bride at your favourite spot. 

The pond in Taehyung’s gardens had always been your favourite. It felt as though the world only belonged to the two of you when you spent evenings alone, sat on the bench, where fireflies danced over the water, their reflection like little stars scattered across the pond, the moon so much larger in its reflection than it looked in the sky. 

The day of your wedding, and all the days after that would forever take the top spot.

Taehyung had always loved your soul. He knew you were pretty, of course, you were; you were the most ethereal being he had ever come across. 

The faeries and pretty little wonders he read about, he always pictured you in their place. But it wasn’t always about the way you looked that had Taehyung coming back for more, or his heart thumping ever so hard against the skin of his chest whenever you were around. 

He thought you had the most wonderful soul that he liked to dip his fingers into, gentle like the softest waves, or cradle it to his chest. The most delicate part of you, ever so precious, the rawest form of yourself that he’d hold on to for as long as he was allowed. Because if one day the two of you were to ever part, he’d find the path of your soul, trace his fingers through every dip and curve he’d memorized, and make his way back to your side. 

The night of your wedding, the night the both of you had given yourself to one another fully, was never a moment Taehyung thought he’d be ready for. It’s not that he was second-guessing his choice– sometimes in life the moments we’ve been waiting for feel like a lifetime away. So many hours and even more minutes between now and then, that when the day stumbles before you in all its joyous glory, no amount of falling into your mind in silent preparation had ever truly prepared you for this. 

Taehyung had worshipped your body like you were his only goddess, you were his religion, his reason for life and death and everything he breathed and consumed in his fragile mortal body. Your souls knotting as your lips pressed so gently against one another, their pinkies forever intertwined as they melted like candle wax and hardened as one lifeform. 

Taehyung particularly loved the feeling of your nails digging into the delicate skin of his shoulders. A feeling forever ingrained into his mind, sending a shiver up his spine when his mind wanders to how you looked in candlelight, spread bare for him to defile. 

The both of you felt as though the honeymoon phase was nothing but lies, an easy scare for those who fell too fast, drowning in acidic love that dragged two people away from one another in harsh waves. Because for you and Taehyung, it never ended. 

Every day that you woke up to Taehyung beside you, had you burying your face in your pillow, smile so hard to contain you covered it up with a kiss to Taehyung’s lips as he slowly woke up. 

“I love you” he’d murmur, eyes barely open. 

“I love you more” a hand cupping his cheek, you’d press a kiss to his jaw; sometimes tickled by the stubble that had grown in. 

Something ever so mundane, yet it always seemed to bring you so much happiness. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

For a week during the summer, Taehyung would hand his duties over to his assistant and take you away for a short vacation. 

You liked the little house the both of you owned on the other side of town, secluded from the rest of the world. 

It had been one summer when your love for rain had started. You often found yourself reading by the window when the summer showers would pay you a visit, dousing the garden in muddy puddles and the gentle pitter-patter of the world’s tears hitting the ground easy white noise as you danced across pages of books. Or simply watched Taehyung sits on the piano bench, only so he could sit in your company.

Taehyung had always loved playing the piano, one of his many loves that he’d buried with the immense amount of work that had piled on to him since taking the seat as head of the household. The grand piano that sat in the far room of the house was his secret door of salvation. 

“Will you play me a piece?” you motion towards the piano, doors to the garden hooked open. Sure to slam shut with the wind picking up. The air was a little sweeter that afternoon, a gentle breeze raking through your hair, licking at the tops of the pages of your book. 

“I haven’t played for a while” Taehyung closes his own book, “But if it’s for you, I could never say no” 

You take a seat beside Taehyung as he flexes his fingers, gently running his hand over the ivory keys. 

“Would you like me to get your music book?” you lay your head on his shoulder. 

He shakes his head, “No, it’s alright. I doubt I’d remember how to read much of it anyways” 

“Do you remember my favourite piece?” 

Taehyung’s tongue wets his bottom lip, “I should hope so” 

Your eyes close as the first note penetrates the air, your head jostling slightly as Taehyung reaches the other end of the keys, his cheek knocking against the top of your head. The tips of his fingers dance elegantly, gentle with each deep hum of the piano’s song. 

You perk up at the first sound of rain, barely there, almost concealed by Taehyung as his movements become bolder, each thick note more pronounced, each deep hum vibrating through your skin. 

You lift your head from his shoulder, “I didn’t think it would rain today” 

You take one look at Taehyung, the smallest smile teasing at his lips when you stand. You kick your slippers off by the open door, toes curling into the damp grass as you step outside. 

You blink as a raindrop falls on your nose, slipping until it’s wetting your lips. You turn back to look at Taehyung, waving when he lifts his head to look at you; and he winces when he presses the wrong note. 

You wander further into the garden, hiking your skirt up so it won’t drag across the wet soil. 

As the rain gets heavier the sound of the piano is slowly drowned out, the world yours for the moment before you’re turning back to Taehyung. 

“Tae” you call back inside, beckoning him over when he turns towards you, “Come dance with me” 

The piano is left and forgotten as Taehyung pushes himself to stand, shoes piled with your slippers as Taehyung steps into the garden. He slinks towards you, hair starting to cling to his forehead as the rain gets heavier. 

“You’ll catch a cold” he takes your hand, tugging you into his chest. 

“But the world is so beautiful when it rains” 

“Just this once I’ll indulge you” he presses a kiss to your forehead. 

As much as the world looks wonderful in that moment, Taehyung outshined it all. Your clothes stuck to the both of you like a second skin, your hair tickling the side of your face, clinging to you like sticky wet vines down the back of your neck.

Taehyung’s hands wander your body, pulling you closer when you start to drift away– your hips finally falling in sync. All those hours of classes on how to dance are washed away by the rain as the both of you stumble, almost falling over each other’s feet. 

“Look” you point towards the back of the estate, “there’s a rainbow” you laugh. 

Taehyung follows your line of sight, “How pretty” he hums, his hands falling to your waist. 

Your fingers tease over his chest, heart hammering under his skin, mere seconds away from jumping out of his skin. Taehyung’s hands wander further down, a surprised moan catching in the back of your throat when he grabs the meat of your ass; tugging you into his body. And you can feel his growing erection against your stomach.  

“Not in the garden” you whisper, fingers trailing lower until you’re gently tugging at his belt. 

Taehyung leans down, warm breath fanning the side of your neck. He presses a wet kiss to the unblemished skin, “I wouldn’t give the serving staff the pleasure of seeing you fall apart for me” he whispers, sodden hair falling over your shoulder.

You take his hands from where they’re teasing over the top of your thighs, “Let’s go” you take long strides back towards the house. 

“Where to, my love?” he trails after you, the most giddy smile on his face. 

You look at him over your shoulder, “Our bedroom” 

Your feet slap wetly against the tile floors, muddy footprints trailing behind the both of you. Youthful joy thrums throughout your body, giggles hard to keep down as the both of you stagger through the hallway towards the bedroom. 

Taehyung’s overzealous in the way he opens the door, and you both wince when it bangs against the wall. The briefest clarity grazes your mind before lust sets back in, and all you can focus on is the incessant throbbing between your legs, and the man stood before you. 

You kick the door closed, Taehyung pulling his wet shirt over his head when you turn back to him– your dress is soon to follow. 

“Would you mind helping me?” you turn your back to Taehyung, shoulders curling inwards as his fingers trace over the intricate ribbing of your corset. 

He’s gentle as he tugs at the ribbons, and you heave a sigh of relief, muscles finally easing a little. Dull throb sinks out of your ribs as you heave a deep breath. 

You turn around, Taehyung’s eyes trailing to your bare chest, curving down the slope, fingers itching at his sides to sink and dig his nails into the plush flesh. He swallows, Adams's apple bobbing under the weight of desire. 

“My beautiful wife” he whispers, hands running up the length of your arms before he’s teasing the edge of your breasts. You trace over his belt, tugging impatiently as he pulls you towards the bed. 

You fall backwards onto the mattress, air momentarily punched from your lungs. Taehyung’s arms cage your head, thigh nudging your legs open for him. 

Your wet hair sticks to your neck, small droplets of water falling over your cheeks from Taehyung’s own hair as his eyes wander over your face. Windows to his soul wide open as sickly sweet love dances within his eyes, adoration you know you’ll never get from another man bared naked, yours for the taking. 

You rut up against his knee, damp cotton panties dragging deliciously against your clit. 

Taehyung’s arms flex as he leans down, plush lips trailing down your jaw, gently plucking soft moans from the back of your throat with every mean nip of his teeth over delicate skin. 

Your thighs clamp around Tae’s leg, arms slithering around his shoulders as you use him for your own pleasure, short bursts of pure arousal wracking up your body with every purposeful tense of his muscles. 

“Good girl” he groans, falling to hold himself up by his elbows as his lips map out the rest of your body– kissing over your neck, the underside of your breasts, down towards your stomach. You whine as he kneels before you, hips bucking upwards to try and chase the slowly fizzling pleasure. 

He kisses your mound over your underwear, tips of his fingers barely brushing over your clit as he trails them down towards your covered folds. Thumb splitting your labia, guttural groan rumbling from his chest as he feels your slick heat.

He can’t seem to stifle the chuckle that slips past his lips either as you whine, the most pitiful pout tugging onto your face as he teases you. 

“How needy” he croons, adding a little more pressure over your entrance, “I’ll make sure to make you feel good” 

You lift your hips, a silent invitation for him to tug your panties off, and he does, dropping them beside him; forgotten as he looks at your slick soaked pussy. 

“Tae” you whisper, impatient as your fingers tangle into his wet hair, careful as you try and tug him closer to where you needed him most without hurting him.

“Hm?” he hums, fingers digging into the meat of your thighs as he pushes them open a little wider, making it easier for him to slip closer to his favourite place. 

Your toes curl as he bends, placing the lightest kiss over your clit, “Want you” 

“Want you too, my love” he murmurs, hot breath fanning over your folds. 

He licks a bold stripe from your entrance to your clit, tongue dipping past your walls before he’s pulling back, wad of spit dribbling over your already sodden cunt.

Your thighs threaten to twitch closed, and when Taehyung notices this he tugs them over his shoulders, dragging you a little further to the edge of the bed. 

His thumb teases over your clit, thrumming at the sensitive little bud as he pushes his tongue back inside of you. The moan you let out is sure to have echoed down the halls, your embarrassment only amplified when you feel another dribble of slick gush past your walls, sure to coat Taehyung’s chin shiny. 

“M’ gonna cum” you hiccup, hips frantically bucking upwards as Taehyung further smothers his face into your pussy. 

He hums, a new wave of arousal coursing through your body at the unexpected vibrations. 

It’s a haphazard flick of your clit that has you tumbling head first into your orgasm, thighs quivering as they clamp around Taehyung’s head, though that doesn’t seem to deter him as he licks into your cunt, swallowing down your release. 

“S’ too much” you sob, hands pushing your lover from between your thighs. He kisses your knee, head flopping across your leg as he looks up at you. 

Your stomach clenches at the dopey smile on his face, thumb running over his bottom lip, still shiny with your arousal. 

“Are you tired, my love?” he asks, fingers curling around your wrists, kissing your palm, then the tips of each finger. 

You shake your head, “I can still go if you’d like” 

“This isn’t about me, it’s about you”

You swallow, unexplainable love swelling inside your chest. 

“Please make love to me” you whisper, pink hue deepening in shade on your cheeks as Taehyung stands at full height, shucking off whatever clothes he still had on. 

You can’t help but wet your lips, watching as he runs a gentle hand over his length, slicking his cock up with pearly beads of precome. 

You push yourself up further on the bed, legs falling open as Taehyung kneels before you. 

He runs a finger through your folds, barely dipping a fingertip inside of you before he’s pulling out, pushing your thighs further apart. 

He guides his cock to your entrance, slicking the head with your cum before he’s gently pushing into you. Your mouth falls open in a silent moan, cunt clenching around Taehyung’s length as he gently rocks into you. 

He groans, barely pulling out before feeding you another inch. His hands roam up the length of your body as he finally bottoms out, hips rutting into you by habit. 

You wrap your arms around his shoulders, pulling him down for a kiss which he melts into, eyes fluttering shut as he tilts his head, tongue teasing over the seam of your lips. 

He licks up into your mouth, concoction of your saliva clinging to his tongue when he pulls back. 

“Ready?” he murmurs against your lips. 

“Mmhmm” you hum, muscles falling lax as Taehyung pushes your thighs up to your chest. He almost pulls out, the air punched from your lungs as he snaps back into you. 

Unabashed, you moan, Taehyung’s name tumbling from your lips like it were the only word you knew as he thrusts into you. 

It’s wet when Taehyung’s thighs meet your ass, sticky with arousal that clings to both your skin and moans a harmony with one another. 

Your hand snakes down the length of your body, between your thighs, teasing over your clit as Taehyung throws his head back, utterly consumed by unadulterated pleasure. 

“Together” he groans, hips losing their calculated pace. 

His cockhead nudges over your sweet spot, a whine dripping off your lips that Taehyung catches, kiss messy, teeth clashing. 

You pick up the pace on your clit, fizzling pleasure slipping down your spine, slick gushing from your hole, so many feelings, so many emotions– all amplified as endorphins buzz at your brain, a shockwave of dopamine setting you alight.   

You feel Taehyung twitch between your walls, your pussy clenching sporadically around his length as he nears his orgasm. 

Taehyung tips over the edge before you do, creamy white cum painting your walls in thick ropes. Your own orgasm following as you feel another wave of Taehyung’s seed flood your cunt. 

His hips twitch as you continue to clench around him, pushing his release further into you. 

Your chest stutters as you try and catch your breath, fingers splayed over your mound as you fall back into reality. 

Your moan as Taehyung pulls out, a hiccup following as he presses a kiss to your cheek. His fingers gather up the dribble of cum that follows his cock, pushing it back inside of you. And you twitch at that, overstimulated. 

He reaches behind your head for a pillow, your thighs falling to the bed, to which Taehyung tuts. 

“Lift your hips up for me, darling” he soothes, singular hand gathering both your ankles, pulling the lower half of your body from the mattress so he can slip the pillow underneath you. 

“You’d look awfully pretty baring my child” his hand trails down your stomach, over your womb. 

“I hope this time we are lucky” you tell him, finger interlacing with the ones over your stomach. 

“Me too, my love. Our child would be the most precious little thing” 

You smile, eyes slipping shut as you paint the image of what your baby would look like, “I hope they look like you” 

“I’d always wished they’d look like you. Their mother holds all the beauty of this cruel world” 

You can’t help the laugh that bubbles from your chest, “Then how about they look like the both of us, as their father shares all of that beauty” 

“That would be wonderful” Taehyung pushes himself off the bed, slipping on a robe that had been forgotten on one of the chairs that morning. 

“What if they aren’t a boy?” your hands fall over your chest, watching Taehyung as he gathers the bowl of water and towels. 

He turns to look at you, “What would it matter if they were a girl?” his eyebrows furrow. 

“Wouldn’t you need an heir” 

He wets his bottom lip, “Boy or girl, I’m not bothered, my love. If we were to have a son then I would never subject them to the horrors of becoming heir. And if we have a precious little daughter, I would love her all the same, and if one day she decides she wants to take over the estate then I would let her” 

The corners of your lips tug up into a smile, “Then I am glad” Your hand finds his as he takes a seat beside you on the bed, dipping the towel into water, gently dragging it over your sweat-slicked skin. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Falling in love with Taehyung had made you a lot of things. 

Juvenile had never been on top of that list, though when you think about it, it really should have been. Or that somewhere written in the fine print of your story, neither of you would die, that you’d both freeze in time and continue your lives for the rest of eternity. 

Some days when you’d sit alone, you wish Monet had been around during your life with Taehyung. His paintings as beautiful as the love you shared. Paintings full of purpose, the world through the eyes of a man– impressionist paintings that had so much raw colour, so much more vibrance than the real world. 

You wish he’d have been able to put paint to canvas, where every gentle stroke of his brush was a piece of stupid, young naivety put into breath-taking art. Meaningful, purposeful, and beautiful. Because your ignorance would have made a beautiful collection, a series of a time when the future wasn’t as perfect as his art. Bringing both you and your lover to downfall. 

Your life was not the art of Monet, nor was it as mesmerising as Van Gogh’s Starry Night. You weren’t frozen in time like you were part of history, forever documented on paper and hung for the world to see. 

You were naive enough to think that with Taehyung’s new rise to power, somewhat unexpected in high society, he wouldn’t have one or two enemies. 

The end of your first life hadn’t been what you had wanted it to be. 

As much as you remember the day you had gotten married or all the afternoons you and Taehyung had spent in the garden, dancing in the rain, under rainbows and the sun that peeked through the clouds, there to celebrate your love just as much as the both of you were; what was supposed to be the perfect ending like all the far-fetched stories Taehyung read, this was more of a tragedy. 

Because that’s what it was– farfetched. 

You remember the afternoon that the perfect life you had, had crumbled. Sand slipping through your fingers, falling to the bottom of the hourglass. 

You lay on the couch, your foot tapping against the arm, Taehyung’s quil tinking against the bottle of ink. In recent months you’d found yourself reading Taehyung’s favourite books, all of their spines worn down, loved and read over and over. 

“Do you smell that?” you push yourself up onto your elbows, the book laid over your lap. 

“Smell what, my darling?” he takes off his glasses, hand running over his tired eyes. 

Your eyes meet Tae’s, “Something smells as though it’s burning” 

The both of you sit in silence for a moment before Taehyung pushes his chair back, peering out the window. His fingers try and pull at the latch, finding it stuck, and he turns back to you. 

“Maybe I’m imagining it” you tell him when you see his eyebrows furrow. 

“I can definitely smell something” he turns back to you, “I can’t tell what. Go and call someone to open this window, it’s jammed”

Your book is dropped onto the couch as you push yourself up, you go to open the door to Taehyung’s office, only for the door not to open. You push a little harder, shoulder knocking uncomfortably against the hardwood. 

You press an ear to the door. 

“What’s wrong?” Taehyung asks, stalking towards you. 

“It won’t open” 

Taehyung makes a noise from the back of his throat, and you step out of the way when he takes hold of the door handle. 

He mirrors your earlier action, shoulder knocking against the door. 

“It won’t open” he turns to you. 

“I know, my love” A gentle smile moulds onto your lips. 

You press your ear to the door again, “Do you hear that?” 

Taehyung follows; ear pressed to the door, “Burning?” 

“Burning?” you stand straight. 

You crouch down, fingers feeling over the gap between the floor and door, “Hello?” you call out, hand flinching away as heat licks over your fingers. 

“Is anyone there?” Taehyung shouts, fist banging against the door. 

“Taehyung” you tug at his shirt, trying to pull him away from the door. He relents, taking a step forwards, “Taehyung, it’s a fire” You take his hand. 

“What?” 

“It’s a fire” You show him your fingertips, hands shaking slightly as the reality of what was happening settles in. 

“You’re hurt” he murmurs, “If one of the staff would just answer we could treat your wounds” his lips barely brush over the burn. 

“Taehyung it’s barely an injury, not when we’re locked in here with a fire right outside that door” 

He swallows, “We’ll find a way out” 

“How?” you dare ask, “We can’t go out the window, that’s suicide from this high up” 

His foot taps against the floor, hand running over his jaw in thought. 

Your focus is snatched away from your lover when something creaks, burning flames slithering under the crack under the door, molten snakes with no goal in mind. 

Taehyung pulls you further into his office, the door crackling as the flames start to chew it up, an onslaught of heat spilling into the room. You can smell the gasoline, splintered wood glistening in it as the door creaks off its hinges, flinging the fire further into the office, and you watch as it singes over the carpet. 

The flames dance before you, a mesmerising dance, crawling up the walls, heated footsteps stalking across the rug, heady puffs of carbon monoxide smoking into the air. 

Your hand flies to cover your mouth when a thin wisp of smoke slips down your windpipe, tickling your throat and searing at the inside of your lungs. 

Taehyung pulls you into his chest as you back into the wall furthest away from the fire, “It’s going to be okay” he heaves, his own hand covering his nose and mouth, dry cough spluttering past his lips. 

Your eyes squeeze shut as the fire slinks closer to the both of you, dangerously close, teasing as it flicks at your ankles, its amble arms chewing up the bookcases, rage only amplifying with each novel it consumes. 

You catch sight of a silhouette standing outside the office, body veiled by thick flames that continue to slink into the office. Another splash of gasoline only makes it burn brighter, sweat tickling the back of your neck. 

Your arms slip around Taehyung’s waist, and he helps you both sit on the ground, arms now holding your shoulders. A lame attempt at holding you away from the blazing fire that creeps closer. 

Your lungs can’t seem to get enough oxygen, panic setting into your bones as you heave for a full breath. Your eyes water as you choke on what should have been a rush of oxygen, only your lungs burn with the ash that settles inside of you, clinging to your windpipe– coating the inside of your mouth. 

“Try not to–” Taehyung coughs, hand lifting to clasp around his throat, cheeks flushing a deep red “-breathe it in too much– cyanide” 

A yelp gets caught in your throat as the flames flicker too close to you, singing the hem of your dress. You try and kick it away, hand flapping down to make sure the fire doesn’t chew at any more of your clothing. You try to ignore the prickly burn to your bare skin, eyes squeezing shut as you try and curl in on yourself to make you smaller. 

You tug on Taehyung’s shirt, dry cough lurching your body forward that Taehyung tries to catch only to heave. 

“I love you” you whisper, the both of you cornered. Nowhere to run. 

The figure stood outside the office long gone, fire now out of their control. A wild beast that had no plans of stopping until it had chewed and gnawed at your home, until it had nothing to fuel it anymore, leaving behind piles of ash and broken dreams– charred bodies and guilty minds to the ones who had started this. 

You flinch backwards when Taehyung’s desk folds in on itself, flames spitting out its joy as the planks of wood slowly char under the heat; a warning for your own destiny. 

His fingers lace into the hair on the back of your head, pulling you into him, “And I love you. When the both of us are reborn, I will find you, and we can fall in love all over again” he manages, the flames looking like hellish wings behind his back, slowly licking at his shirt, sizzling the fabric– more chemicals sifting through the air and into your fragile lungs. 

Taehyung curls further into you when the fire licks at his shoes, easily chewing through the leather, deft fingertips tracing up his legs, and over his body.

“Don’t say that” Your fingers loosen their grasp on his shirt as you heave for another breath, mind entirely gone as you spin, the world spinning with you. Your brain felt as though it were being flushed out with helium, pressure so much you think it might explode. 

Your eyes squeeze shut.

And when you open again, Jimin’s there. 

His eyes still wide with shock. 

You feel bile rise up your throat at the sight of him, blood smeared across his perfect face, puncture still oozing red from his neck soaking through his shirt fully. Your floor is in no better shape, though you think there's as much of your own blood as there is his. 

“Jimin?” you whisper, vision momentarily veiled by salty tears that fall down your cheeks like pitiful pearls, mixing with the crimson the drips from a gash in your head, dull ache migrating to behind your eyes. 

“Jimin you have to wake up now. Please” 

He doesn’t move, not when you hear footsteps from the other room– heavy boots that clatter against old wood– not when you call his name. Not when the front door creaks closed and the world is silent once more, or when your chest stutters out another breath and you feel another wave of blood gush out of your stomach, adding to the puddle below the both of you. 

“Jimin” you call again, choking on your own sob, fists balling up, “Jimin, please don’t leave me. I’m scared” 

You look into his eyes. Nothing. All signs of life spilt onto the floor. 

In a sick and twisted way, you’re glad Jimin had gone before you. 

You’d have hated it if he had to watch you dead on the bedroom floor while he slowly follows you. At least now you could be with him a little longer, even if you couldn’t tell him goodbye for the last time. Or tell him how much you love him, or how happy he’d made you, or how grateful you are. 

So many words left unsaid, that you swallow back down with a sob. And they mix with the bile that singes your throat, so close to spilling onto the puddle of red as you make eye contact with your dead lover. 

You drag your body through the blood on the floor, closer until your chest is pressed against Jimin’s and your body falls lax against him, arm slung over his side. 

You press the palm of your hand against your open wound, what little hope you had left inside of you, the smallest voice whispering that maybe you could survive. Though somewhere deeper down you know that your soul will soon follow Taehyung’s, and now Jimin's too. 

You push your head into the curve where his neck meets his shoulder, tangy, metallic blood staining your lips as you kiss over the tainted skin. 

He was still warm, skin still very much his as your fingers skim over his back. Ever so gentle as though he would crack if you weren’t careful. And you would have gathered him up in your arms if you’d had the strength. 

And at that final moment when it settles within your mind and your heart that your body can no longer hold onto the slither of life still inside of you– the easing thump of your heart mellowing inside your chest. You remember the little note Jimin left on his pillow for you to wake up to that morning. 

“When you and I hug, our hearts are locked behind our ribcages and touch through our skin. Always beating in sync. And for as long as my heart beats beside yours, it will belong to you. For those moments we part, perhaps it falls out of sync, and when we reunite, my heart may just be reminded who it beats for. And we will be in sync once more ♡’

☆ﾟ thank you for reading!! reblogs are always appreciated, and please let me know what you think!!

permanent taglist: @m1sss1mp @supernoonanyc

[hollowwrites]

Blindsided

Ominis x MC

Part 15

Summary - Ominis has become sick of Sebastian’s possession of the dorm room and has temporarily moved into the Undercroft. Finally…some privacy…

Again feel free to swap Evelyn with MC or Y/N

Warnings - 🌶️ Fingering, Female masturbation, Mild Choking, Biting, Praise Kink (If you squint) the word gusset (I know some people hate it) all characters aged up 18+

Sorry if this seems really awkward. I personally hate smut that is written just a bit too smoothly. If I’m writing two people’s first time…it’s going to be awkward and slow. Sorry if that’s not what you’re into. Fair play to people who wrote smut I am deffo a fluff gal. Sorry if this is bad. No one look at me!!!

Word Count - 6173

-

“Thought I’d find you here”

Ominis raised his head as though it weighed a tonne when he heard Evelyn walk into the Undercroft.

As normal when Ominis occupied the space, a faint piano could be heard from somewhere within the cluttered room. The smell of tea filled the cavernous space and the singular large chair he favoured had been pulled into a more central position, as though he were looking over the Triptych like a window.

Obviously he wasn’t.

But none of that really registered with Evelyn.

What concerned her currently was the way he flinched when she entered. Like she’d startled him.

“Hmmm, were you looking for me?” He asked lazily pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Oh…only all my life” she whispered scared to shatter the peaceful ambiance he had created.

He exhaled a laugh as she approached him her hands finding his shoulders and kneading softly into the harsh panels of his shoulder blades.

It had been a few weeks since the last trial and Sebastians attempts to try and solve the Mystery of the spider egg had been fruitless. It had gotten to be a bit too much, the boys dorm now covered in silk and arachnids from his initial attempts to solve its puzzle…Arachnids or Acromantulas, they’re weren’t entirely sure.

But all Sebastian was left with was an empty room full of spiders and an exasperated friend sick of pulling webbing from his hair.

Each night he attempted to resolve it but so far to no avail. And finally, after weeks of arachnid related torture, Sebastian finally asked everyone for help.

Ominis agreed, of course, on the condition that he would not be returning to the dorms until the trail was done. And only after every last eight legged demon had been purged from the halls.

So for now he resided in the Undercroft, a makeshift bed tucked under the Triptych, all blankets and pillows and no mattress.

Not that it was unusual for Ominis to sleep soundly in uncomfortable locations.

“Did I startle you? That’s very unlike you” Evelyn mused, softly digging into his shoulders. A long exhausted moan left his lips and his eyes closed slowly as she did.

“Sorry I wasn’t paying attention…I haven’t been sleeping” Evelyn opened her mouth to fuss, to ask the inevitable string of questions she usually did upon hearing that. He waved her off dismissively “Don’t worry not nightmares…been trying to figure out the next trial for Sebastian”

“I see…” her hands reached a standstill at the apex of his shoulders and as she did, he reached up, soothingly, brushing across her knuckles until a familiar dull poking, pricked his fingertips.

He smiled wistfully.

”You’re wearing my ring” he said mutedly

“Of course I am…It’s beautiful”

“You don’t have to…” he adds, though in a much quieter voice; not quite a whisper, but close.

“I know I don’t have to…but you gave it to me. It means something” she replied in kind, her tone matching his. Filled with love and adoration.

He smiles softly, taking her wrist between his fingers and pulling her around to his front. He rested his forehead against her stomach and sighed.

It was as though he was pulling her in for strength, using her warmth and affection to fuel him. And for what it was worth, it worked. He pulled away moments later, a charming albeit lopsided smile on his face. He rose from his chair, taking her hand effortlessly and looped his arm around her waist.

“Dance with me…” he demanded in a soft tone

“Is that how you ask?” He had already spun her around slowly, bringing her back to his chest as she said this. The smile on her face oozed into her words making her argument…completely moot.

“Oh…I apologise profusely” he said sounding not the least bit sorry. He took one long step backwards, heels clicking together as he bowed deeply. Somehow, his eyes never left hers…

“Please…” the word was lithe as it slithered from his lips and into her ears, sending a shiver down her spine. He chuckled before continuing; “May I have this dance?”

“Hmm…” she took a step forward as he rose back to his towering height. “Do I have a choice?”

“I’m afraid not, dear”

Despite his words, and despite the distinct almost predatory look in his eyes…he extended a hand to her.

The slight twitch of his fingers commanded her attention, and though she would never deny him, there was a pull towards him. Like destiny…or fate.

If one believes in such things.

She took his hand, though her fingers glided along his palm, wrist and forearm up to his shoulder as she tucked herself into him. She wanted to tell him to wipe the smirk of his face, but something about the curl of his lip…the smallest display of teeth as his smirk grew wider…

He looked…

…happy.

The eagerness at which he grabbed her waist was queue enough for Evelyn. She took his other hand gently in hers whilst his arm pulled impossibly closer. It had hooked itself just below her ribs and with his domineering height, pulled her almost off the floor entirely. She giggled softly, her toes the only thing keeping her grounded as their chests met.

Slowly, and with a more intimate nature than he showed her in the Common Room, he lead her across the desolate chamber.

Every now and then, he would stop to kiss her hand. Each time he paused, the kiss became less and less chivalrous.

First it was her hand, then her cheek, then his head stooped low so they could dance cheek to cheek.

And suddenly, he was nuzzling her neck, his nose drawing long arduous lines across her jaw.

Ominis took in a deep breath; her scent fuelling him further and made his eyes go glassy.

He strode forward, dipping her low causing her head to tilt back as he held her horizontal to the floor.

His hand splayed supportively across the small of her back, thumb stroking across her waist. His warm breath ghosted across her neck.

The sharp inhale from her lips snapped him out of his reverie. He gently shook his head and pulled her back to her feet, his hands sturdy as they held onto her waist just a touch too tightly.

His eyes remained fixed on her and unlike the usual calm pools she’d gaze lovingly into…

Two darkening wells stared back at her.

”How is it you never seem to fumble for my hands? You always seem to know exactly where I am….no matter what” she shifted uncomfortably under his direct eye contact.

She did want to know…it was a question she had on her mind for the longest time. But right now she just needed to move his gaze.

It wasn’t like he made her uncomfortable. It was the way he looked at her.

As she swayed, so did he.

As she leaned in closer, so did he.

It was one of an embarrassingly long list of things he did that caused her stomach to twist and turn.

And it was like he knew that too.

The look of calm and content happiness faded with the blink of an eye, replaced with this twinkle she rarely saw in Ominis.

She saw it almost daily in Garreth and Sebastian…but Ominis?

His devious nature wound the knot forming, tighter.

What is he concocting?

“Honestly?…” He started “…I’m not sure. Best I can come up with is my magic advances my sense of Proprioception, past what a normal person has”

“Pre…prop…what?” Evelyn tilted her head and he mimicked her, almost like he was proving a point.

“Proprioception…” he chuckled and the twinkle in his eye flared once more. “…let me show you”

He stepped away from her, his long fingers reaching up to undo the knot of his tie.

The last thing she saw before he wrapped the soft, silken material around her eyes was his wide, devilish smirk.

“Can you see?” He asked, amusement heavy in his voice.

“Not a great deal…” she muttered and lifted the tie slightly to peer at him. He paced back and forth in front of her before he disappeared just off to her right and behind her.

“No cheating…” Ominis scolded softly, plucking her wrist away from her body and keeping it there, letting the silken blindfold fall back to place.

“Do you see how you know where your arm is despite not seeing it?” He twirled her around as he had in the dance before and she gasped.

This is what he experienced on a daily basis and she can’t handle it for less than a minute.

It drove her insane.

She trusted him implicitly but the idea of him being in completely control of her in that moment…

…her stomach suddenly felt hollow and her lungs empty.

“That’s Proprioception, the sense of knowing where your body is in relation to itself” he let her arm fall back down to her side but not before kissing this inside of her wrist. She gasped again listening intently to the click of his heel against the stone as he started to circle her.

”Mine is just a little stronger. It extends beyond myself…things around me. So I can see you in front of me and so long as you don’t move…” he was silent for a beat, her breath catching when his voice was suddenly right next to her ear “…too quickly…I know where you are. What you’re doing…”

His words felt heavy as though they carried more meaning than a simple explanation of his abilities.

“I can focus it too like duelling. It’s much stronger if I have my wand” he continued casually, like the breathe upon her neck and his words weren’t setting her stomach ablaze.

He had to know.

He knew everything else

“I…see” she muttered shakily, her hands twitching to remove the blindfold. Once again, he caught her fingers, entwining them with his own, his chest flush with her back. He held their combined hands against her stomach whilst he pulled her hair from her shoulder. His finger danced across her skin as he did so.

She took in a sharp intake of air through her mouth, her lips seemed constantly parted as though she anticipated him kissing her.

Maybe it was wishful thinking.

He remained stationed behind her, his hand falling to her waist, feeling the steadily increasing rise and fall of her breathing against her ribs. His breath was warm against her neck and she could feel his lips against her ear as he breathed.

But…Ominis was a gentleman. And so released her, rather abruptly, and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“You know…” she whispered, a devious plan forming as she pulled the tie from her eyes.

He was showing marvellous levels of restraint.

Restraint she no longer had

Because of him…

“…‘Mystery Man’ still hasn’t asked me to the ball”

“Oh I know…” he grumbled, his voice low and strained.

“It’s starting to feel a little like no one wants to go with me” she sighed overly dramatically and took a step closer to him. His eyes went wide when he felt her getting nearer and nearer…until he could feel the heat of her chest against his.

He chuckled heavily.

“I don’t know. There was that Durmstrang…” he brushed some hair behind her ear, resisting every urge to pull at the strands and pull the noises he’d heard too few times. “…I think he learnt his lesson though. And there’s Prewett, but I think he knows better. It seems at least there’s some semblance of a brain between those ears”

Ominis laughed…darkly. It caused vibrations to emanate through both of their chests and he pulled away to ‘gaze’ down at her.

“I wonder why no one has asked me?” She pondered putting on the most saccharin, overly innocent tone.

“Probably because…” he growled out pushing forward slightly so their noses almost touched. He took in a calm breath “…they know you’re mine…”

“Have you staked your claim on me?” She whispered back, lips dangerously close to his to the point they brushed delicately against the full flesh of his bottom lip. “Because I don’t remember you asking…”

“I don’t need to ask…no one will take what is mine” his voice like music dancing it’s way across her skin but it sounded almost painful. The restraint he currently showed was…waning. “…I may no longer be a part of that family but…Gaunts are known for being quite possessive” His fingers brushed up her arms to cup her face, his fingers trembling against her cheek.

“Yes…of artifacts and trinkets…not really people”

“I’ve just found a different kind of treasure I wish to hoard away for myself”

“Stop…” she said sternly but playfully “Flattery will get you no where”

“Won’t it? Then why is that hummingbird of a heart of yours rattling agaisnt its cage” he whispered against the shell of her ear.

“Ominis…”

“Yes?”

“Kiss me…”

“I…I can’t…” he groaned his hands dropping to her waist, fingernails digging into flesh there as though he was physically keeping himself back

“You need to get off me before I do something…” his voice trailed off, low and husky. And filled with an emotion she’d not heard from him much before. He sounded…embarrassed

“What if I want you to do something?” She urged trying to sound level headed and calm, though she sounded whiney and needy as the words came from her lips.

His head dropped to her shoulder, as it often did when he sought comfort. His lips remained a breath away from her neck, trembling at the temptation to just sink his teeth in.

But that was selfish.

And that’s what he wanted.

He wanted to make her happy. Make her feel loved. Make her feel…

“I don’t know what I’m doing…” he confessed against her skin.

“Nor do I…” she whispered back, her hand reaching up to trace tiny intricate patterns across his back. She hoped they were talking about the same thing, she hoped he wanted this to.

She hoped she wasn’t making a fool of herself…

“It’s not that simple” he sighed and rested his full weight against her shoulder. “You can see. You’ll know when you’re…doing something I like. And there’s only so much books can teach someone with my…disadvantage” his face buried further into to her neck and hair. Like he was trying to hide away.

“Do you have any idea how frustrating, how much it pains me, to have you within inches of me and all I can do…is this?”

This was strange.

Normally he was quite confident with his abilities. Not moments ago he showed off how he saw the world around him with almost arrogant levels of confidence. Most of the time she forgot he was even blind, with how capable and independent he was.

But maybe this all felt a bit much. A bit too real.

Then suddenly she felt guilty for trying to coax him further.

“We don’t have to go any further than y-“ she started before his head snapped back up to look down at her, shaking his head over and over.

“No no no no no that’s not what I’m…I definitely do. If you do that is. I’m just…apprehensive” he tripped and stumbled over his words, trying to get her to understand his unique predicament.

Then her mind spiralled to how she had helped him in the past, how she’d taught him Herbology and Potions techniques, shown him the texture of materials, guided his hand when he needed it.

And her heart sank as an idea formed in her mind.

“Ominis, Do you want to try…being intimate…with me?” She asked shakily, her hands snaking up his arm to cup his cheeks, imploring that he listen to her. Thank Merlin he was blind, or perhaps her cheeks may have blinded him with how hot they were glowing.

“Desperately…” A dry, humourless laugh left him “…it’s practically all I have thought about since the First Trail…but”

“But…” she interrupted “…I have an idea”

She took a step away from him, his head quirked curiously to the right as he sought her out. It wouldn’t take him long, her fingers gently took his and she pulled him towards the armchair he normally resided in.

“Do you remember that Divination assignment? The palm reading?” She asked gently taking his hand and absentmindedly tracing over the lines on his hand. As she did he muttered softly to himself…

“Heart Line…Life Line…Fate line…”

He recited with perfect accuracy, though that lesson was weeks ago.

Then everything clicked and his cheeks burned hotter than he’d ever felt. Or that she’d ever seen.

“Are you…suggesting you can…show me how to…” Ominis’ words were careful and calculated. He’d come this far, he wasn’t ruining everything on a simple misunderstanding.

“It’s what other couples do…” She reasoned, suddenly feeling dirty or sordid for even thinking such a thing “…Only their method is trail and error and ours would just be a little more-”

“…Hands on” he smirked.

Bastard…how is he always so…so…

“Ugh…” Evelyn groans pulling her hand away from his palm and covering her face. “…It’s all just so unromantic now I think about it” she muffled from the sanctuary behind her hands.

“Oh don’t worry…” his long fingers looped around her wrists pulling them away and to her side. He took a step closer to her, his head bowed low to meet her gaze if she wished “…I have romance covered. That’s not what I’m worried about. I just need to know you’re okay with this”

As he spoke, his thumb drew tiny circles across her palm. It was almost as though they were dancing again.

“I am…” she breathed.

The smile he then wore was unlike any she had seen before. It had a softness to it initially. Like he was pleased she trusted him and she couldn’t help but mirror it. But then the longer they stood there, swaying slightly, the harder it grew. An edge to lips she hadn’t even seen when he’d pushed her against his bed.

And whereas last time there was a nervous, sickly feeling in her gut, now there was just…need.

Want.

He spun her again as he had earlier though instead of pulling her back to the exact same position, this time he pulled her so her back pressed against his chest.

“I’m so glad you suggested this, Evelyn.” He murmured over the shell of her ear, his fingers combing the hair from one side of her neck to the other.

“I am a fast learner. I’ve already learned what you like and what you don’t like…” she could feel his breath against her neck as he whispered down to her, his cheek nuzzling against the side of her face.

“For example…”

The smug smirk that tugged at his lips was so blatant in his voice.

And before Evelyn could question him, or combat him or flirt back gently as she usually would…

His teeth dug into the flesh of her neck, just below her ear.

She bit into her lip to stop the gasp from ripping from her. But he must have known. Must’ve heard the restraint in the hitch of her breath, or the way her shoulder squared in his arms. Because his teeth pulled back and he lapped against the divots he left behind. He licked broadly up her neck to her earlobe, making her shiver. And once again his teeth were against her as he grinned.

“Don’t silence yourself…please” he purred “I need to hear you. I need to know…”

“I understa-aaah!” She choked out. His lips closed around her earlobe, suckling softly before letting it go.

“Good…” he praised and even that sent a shiver down her spine. “…you must tell me if you don’t like something…”

It felt a little like he was trying to demonstrate what he meant. Like the next thing he did, he almost expected her to say no.

But she didn’t…

And she wanted more.

His fingers came up from her waist to undo the bow around her collar. When it fell away, he tossed it to the side like it offended him. Like he had some sort of vendetta against anything that kept him from her.

Then his hands were everywhere again. One tugged at the collar he had freed whilst the other moved towards the buttons of her blouse, again freeing more of her soft flesh for him to devour.

The moment her shoulder was available his lips found it, mapping across her skin.

And she was fine for the moment.

Her breathing fast and shallow as she enjoyed his attentions but she was fine.

Calm.

Collected.

Then his lips brushed over the sensitive area between her neck and shoulder and she gasped under her breath. A tiny soft sigh of pleasure that not even she was certain she made.

But he heard…

And in response his teeth dug harshly into the muscle. And she crumpled and fell against him with a loud and needy whimper.

She felt him grin, though his teeth still sunk in. Then his cheeks hollowed and the pressure against her neck felt divine.

“Ominis…” she whimpered and pressed against him.

“Too much?” he murmured as his lips left her neck with a sinful pop.

“Not enough…” Evelyn murmured, barely able to get the words out before his teeth were on her again.

Everything ramped up.

The pressure at her neck, the speed of his fingers on her blouse. Not even he could keep up with himself as he ripped a button from the fabric, pulling it from her shoulder.

The button pinging off and cascading to the floor broke something in Ominis and he groaned.

Deep and guttural from his chest.

She felt it vibrate through her back, arching against him to feel more.

That’s when her leg stumbled back and she felt a hardened bulge press against her rear.

The tiniest amount of friction that must have put against him caused him to growl, his fingernails digging into the flesh of her stomach as his hands started to explore under her shirt.

She inhaled sharply.

And her hand flew to her wand, tucked haphazardly in her waistband, directing it towards the Undercrofts entrance.

“Colloportus” she whimpered and the light at the tip of her wand fizzled out.

Ominis’ tore himself from her neck with a groan.

“What are you doing?” He asked but his voice was heavy, husky, heady.

“I’m not having a repeat of last time…” she murmured, staring at her wand in confusion. She shook her wrist and tried again…

…as Ominis’ hand drifted lower, his fingertips delving just under her waistband.

“Collo-portus” she gasped once again the spell failing as she muttered the incantation incorrectly.

Ominis just laughed besides her ear.

“Am I rendering you speechless? Powerless?” He purred, his other hand wrapping around her.

That hand hadn’t yet touched her skin. It had remained somewhat reserved, tugging at her clothes. So when it graced the skin of her chest it was significantly cooler than his other, forcing a gasp from her lips and her skin to pucker and tingle with goosebumps.

“You’re…” she started with a flash of venom in her voice, wanting to be frustrated at him. “…just stop a second. Let me lock the gates…” she breathed.

He chuckled darkly and removed his hands from her holding them up in surrender.

“Apologies, my love.”

“You’re not sorry…” she muttered and shrugged her blouse back over her shoulder, approaching the gate with a death glare.

She tried several times to lock the gates to no avail. Her hands kept shaking, her voice breaking. And just as she was about to give up and do it the ‘old fashioned muggle way’, the mechanisms in the gate forced themselves closed with a heavy ‘clunk’.

When she turned, Ominis was sat casually in his armchair, wand extended to the gate with a smarmy grin on his lips.

She approached once again muttering under her breath.

“Shut up…”

“Oh don’t be like that…” he crooned smoothly “…I like that I’ve affected you in such a way.”

His wand twirled between his fingers as she approached and she stood before him, pouting rather obviously. He simply chuckled and tapped his lap.

“Sit…”

His commanding tone sent a shiver up her spine and her knees buckled, bending to perch upon his thigh, despite her bratty and frustrated disposition.

His arm snaked around her waist and he pulled her back again, flush to his chest. His other hand lifted her knee to rest upon his, repeating the process for her other leg as he slipped it over his own.

Then as he spread his own legs, pulling and parting her along too, a startled little mewl left her.

“Tell me to stop…” he whispered against her ear, his hand stilling against her waist

“I don’t want you to…” she breathed shakily, arching into him and once again feeling that pulsing heat pressing into her.

“You’re shaking…” he stated as though it were a reason for him to cease his tormenting.

“That’s not necessarily a bad thing”

“Oh I know…” he smirked against her neck. “…I just wanted to hear you admit it”

He knew he was probably being overconfident. But that’s what Ominis did best. He was blessed with a silver tongue and so he would use it.

So far it was working.

Each gruff grumble from his lips sent a wave of goosebumps over her skin, and his fingers followed.

She shivered and this time they prickled along her stomach where his fingers lay dormant. It shot a pulse through him, his fingers twitching back to life to explore her.

Feel her.

He was learning so much.

He already knew about the scar across her waist, he thought perhaps she would flinch when his digits brushed across them but…she was moaning again.

Her marred skin was…sensitive.

So very…very sensitive.

Then he recalled she had another. Another Sebastian had given her deep in that Scriptorium across her heart.

What a perfect excuse to test his hypothesis.

He bought his hand up and over her clothed breasts, that simple act itself causing her to shudder and whine.

So what would happen if I did this?

His middle finger traced over the swirling pattern at her chest and once again a wave of goosebumps puckered beneath him.

For a second, he almost regretted asking her to be more vocal.

Her constant shallow breath filled his ears. Her soft sighs, and whimpers were more distracting than he assumed they would be

But, oh, how those noises were heavenly.

And thankfully, he found his body acting on instinct, no matter how distracting she had become.

His hands roamed, explored, squeezed, touched…delving to places he had never dreamed of finding on her.

Mapping curves and valleys of hers he’d only ever fantasised about.

When his fingers breached the soft lacey material of her bralette, she stayed silent.

She bit into her bottom lip to try and ease her need for him. Because this was too much. How had he not even touched her and yet she was a pooled and sodden mess.

Ominis mistook her silence for displeasure, and moved further in.

The books certainly hadn’t covered this. The few points of research detailed many erogenous zones across a woman. And though he wasn’t idiotic enough to think all women were the same, most books, most erotic novels he had read said the same.

So, purely for academic purposes, he gripped her just a little bit harder.

And was rewarded with the most beautiful and sinful whimper he had heard. With that very moan came another wave of goosebumps that he greedily followed. Like her very skin was speaking to him.

Ominis squeezed again, the soft flesh of her breast spilling out between his fingers as her manhandled her in the very best of ways.

He kneaded her, much for his own pleasure as for hers, and when he felt the tiny puckered nub between his fingers, he squeezed again.

Another sharp whine pulled from Evelyn’s chest. He felt it vibrate along her chest and for a second he was enthralled.

He copied that same action, kneading and squeezing and stroking, pinching her hardening peak near his knuckle.

Only his other hand reached up to her chest. Where he’d felt that vibration.

And with every gasp and murmur and coo he felt it.

So he chased it, rumbling up her chest to her neck where it was strongest before it left her lips.

“Ominis…” she muttered as her head rolled back onto his shoulder.

“I can move my hand if you want…” he spoke, somewhat strained after he realised his fingers wrapped around her throat.

“I…like it” she whispered, somewhat shamefully.

But Ominis was well past the point of caring. He’d built such a strong image in his head of her splayed across him, keening and mewling for more. For him.

And he had the luxury of hearing, truly hearing, everything he was doing to her. Perhaps he was better off…

His fingers tightened only slightly against her throat, feeling for each rumble of a moan his other hand was causing her.

Then his mouth followed in his hands stead.

Nipping, sucking, tasting every inch of her neck that he could access, the soft and gentle tugging of her flesh turned her to putty in his arms.

It was almost like he’d caught a nerve and her whole body squirmed with a moan. And she pressed deliciously against the painful throbbing in his groin.

He hissed at the sensation, both foreign and familiar to him.

And in that moment he realised she was learning just as much about him as he was her.

Because she did it again.

On purpose.

And as he gasped, he relinquished the hold his teeth had on her shoulder, panting against the wet skin of her neck.

So she did it again, rubbing herself across the length that was forced down his trouser leg, thanking every god there was that multiple layers of clothing were between them. Lest she be confronted with the slick she most definitely would leave upon his leg.

He gasped again, croakier and huskier than before.

And she laughed. A low seductive little laugh that triggered something in Ominis.

“Show me…” he demanded with a growl, snatching her wrist up and dragging it to her opened legs.

Perhaps she was a little too eager. He’d spent the past…Merlin knows how long, teasing her and her body ached. Her stomach had twisted and tightened with a desire she’d never felt before. Even when she was alone.

So she fumbled with his hand in hers, his other still tweaking and kneading at her soft mounds.

He ghosted over hers, softly, delicately copying her movements as she pulled her underwear to the side.

Then his hand left, straying to the fabric of her skirt, bunched around her hips.

“This is long enough, isn’t it?” He inquired flatly.

“Er…it’s comes to my knee why do you-“

Then he tore into her underwear, ripping along the gusset and exposing her completely. Whether he knew it or not, his knuckle dragged over her centre as he did and she twitched at the new feeling of someone else touching her so intimately.

“This will be hard enough without things getting in the way” his voice resonated from behind her, his chest vibrating against her back.

That was…understandable. And she would be lying to herself if the act of Ominis ripping her underwear from her didn’t turn her into a living puddle.

And it was getting ridiculous how long this had gone on for. So she snatched his hand from the hem of her skirt and positioned him over her again.

His hand mirrored hers the whole way. Like there was a second delay to everything she was doing.

Though when her finger dipped between her folds, and his shortly followed, he snatched his hand away in an instant, bolting straight upright. His finger and thumb rubbed together feeling her slick desire on his finger and his breath caught in his throat.

“You’re…” he held a note on his throat like he couldn’t think of the correct word. The appropriate word.

“…so…” he gulped and swallowed thickly, the bob of his throat brushing against her shoulder

“…wet…”

And whilst he was struggling to think of words, Evelyn was struggling to not run her finger along herself like she knew she liked.

“For you…” she murmured on an exhale.

Ominis could feel himself twitching against her rear and again something snapped within him.

His arm scooped her up around her waist, pulling her closer and tighter to his chest.

“Show me…” he growled once more in her ear before his teeth attacked her neck once again.

His finger ghosted over hers again, shaking as they dipped into that pooling well of want.

Her fingers twitched back into action, immediately finding that bundle of nerves at the top that made her toes curl.

And made Ominis’ head spin.

Whether it was his hearing, how well they knew each other, or how quickly he picked things up when explained properly, he didn’t know. But soon he got the idea of what she wanted. And she was going too quickly for his liking.

He could feel her winding and coiling like a spring in his lap, her panting little breaths filling the air and his name tumbling from her lips. She writhed and whimpered on top of him.

Then suddenly his mind filled with fabrications of himself being deep inside of her, those same noises tumbling from her. That’s same warmth he could feel radiating on his finger, surrounding him. And his brain went foggy and instinct kicked in again.

Just as she reached and clambered for that peak.

And her thighs clamped closed for that little friction she knew would push her over the edge.

He ruined it.

All at once it was torn from her as long boney fingers dug into the softness of her thighs, pinning her eager hand to the side and spreading her legs once again.

She could’ve killed him.

“Keep. Them. Open.” he spat through his teeth, moving his leg to pin her ankles behind his calves. She gave a few tester pulls, desperate for any form of friction as she felt that heat slowly dying between her legs.

She couldn’t move.

And her breath stuttered and whimpered needily. She was about to cuss him, turning and demanding he continue before that knot tied itself back up again.

But Ominis had other ideas. Ideas that perhaps right now she wouldn’t appreciate but future her would.

His fingers trailed over her core mapping every fold and divot. Easily. He slid in between over and over, delighting in every time his finger circled that nub that sent her shivering.

Then his finger slipped down, deep, entering her slowly. Carefully.

He almost felt bad for a second. The noise that left her. It sounded pained. But he pulled from her and that same needy mewling spilled from her until he did it again, her back arching into him. And this time it wasn’t so pained, more of an anguished sigh of relief.

It was…delicious.

Every sinful sound from her lips and each soaked ripple between her legs. He was simply exploring yet to her it was everything.

Him feeling her

Him pleasuring her

Him filling her.

With each pump of his finger she felt that knot loosening once more and when his other hand joined his first, rolling tiny circles over her most sensitive spot…she halted.

She became undone.

That release so close to being hers.

And he knew it.

“Let me see…” he begged, his hand pulling from her and hovering just in front of her face, his thumb replacing his own absence with dexterous accuracy.

She pushed into his hand, not trusting her vocal cords to maintain a readable level. Imagine the Undercroft being discovered after centuries because she had moaned too loudly.

His fingers drifted over her features, taking in the small knot of exquisite ecstasy on her brow. The heat from her cheeks. Her swollen, plump lips from her own teeth.

And as his finger ghosted her lips she took it into her mouth, tasting her own desire faintly on his finger. Not that, that’s why. She just needed something to mute her…

Practically crying into his ear, her head lulled back as she mumbled his name through her own teeth clamped around his fingers.

A comfortable warm silence fell over them as she slowly recovered, the white spots of her vision fading. Only then was she aware of the gentle kisses he placed along her neck.

“Why…” she panted “…are you so good at everything you choose to do?”

He chuckled, deep and low.

“I had an excellent albeit impatient teacher”

Masterlist

genuinely if any of you have any tips or anything please tell me this genuine pained me to write but im proud my first smut

[raccoonfallsharder]

Hi there! This is probably such a silly question, so I'm sorry in advance, but in your fics, how long is a "cycle"?

I've gathered that a rotation is the equivalent of about a day (I think? lol) . Is a cycle the intergalactic equivalent of like a week or maybe a month in your fics? I originally thought a year, but in WAtG its stated that Jo "crosses paths with the Yondu Clan once every fifteen cycles or so." So a year seems like the wrong assumption on my part haha

Thank you ♡

hey honeycomb! these are SUCH FUN questions because i am such an UNHINGED NERD, especially about time and trying to make things make sense in space lol (also omg please never apologize for asking questions?? ever?? you’re a delight. curiosity is beautiful and giving other people a chance to explain their thoughts/loves/interests is a gift you give whenever you ask)

so first of all it’s worth noting that i’m pretty sure in at least one of the games, it’s the opposite — a cycle is like a day, i think? and a rotation is a week or a month? (i used to know this with more certainty because last year, i had researched obsessively to find out if there was a singular canonical way of measuring the passage of time in marvel-outer-space. fyi the short answer is no). worth noting: this is how i thought of time when i was writing ᯓ⋆｡°✩practice because that takes place in the eidos universe but i deliberately didn't dwell on it too long so people could interpret the length of time however they wanted.

now, my understanding is that in the mcu, this is inverted. i had read that the mcu GOTG writers think of a rotation as being about a day and a cycle being about a week, so that is what i use in almost all of my other fics (especially the longer ones). sometimes in oneshots i default to day and week just for ease of understanding, especially for readers who may just stumble upon the story without having gotten used to my quirks.

now that’s the short answer and you can feel free to bail if you don’t want to read about the stupid amount of time i put into thinking about this lol. i swear I won’t hold it against you. for fucks sake SAVE YOURSELF

tsk. should've run.

as mentioned, i use “rotation” to indicate about a day, and “cycle” to indicate about a week. i also use “multicalendar circumrotations” or “circs” for a year-ish which is halfway made-up (the gotg holiday special mentions the multicalendar and i was like “i need a word that isn’t rotation or cycle or revolution to go with this” lol).

i also broke rotations into three shifts. for my purposes there are usually two wake shifts and one sleep shift per rotation, but i imagine some lifeforms require different amounts of rest and wakefulness - so while the start and end of shifts are standardized, how they are designated really varies by crew.

i think this was about all i had figured out when i was writing Window *:･ﾟ✧* - I think I had maybe approximated a cycle at around 8-9 days and a circ at about a year and a half. but when i started writing cicatrix.⋆☁︎:･꧂ i was referencing longer lengths of time a lot more often (and needed at least a mental guide for things like decades and ccertain chunks of years), so i expanded on my time measurements a lot more thoroughly (see below).

i don’t have anything equivalent to months but at some point i was like “i need to indicate something more than a handful of cycles and less than a circ” and so i added quarter-circs to my lexicon ‘cause months didn’t make sense in the context of a sort of “intergalactic standard” of time measurement.

there was a time when i thought about breaking down hours and minutes and shit too but then i was honestly like “dae that’s fucking bonkers. stop girl” so i decided that most universal translators are capable of doing the basic math required to calculate smaller units of time across languages lol.

a rare glimpse of dae notes/references from the top of my cicatrix notes document:

rotation: 30 hours (10/10/10 shifts) cycle: 10 rotations (300 hours) (1.79 weeks) quarter: 10 cycles circumrotation: 40 cycles (71.6 weeks) (1.38 years) 10 years = 7.26 circumrotations 4.13 years = 3 circs

anyway that's it i think, that's everything, it's ridiculous and i'm ridiculous and also thanks for giving me the opportunity to be a total loser about this. i am very cool and normal

i truly do appreciate the question honestly. may your day be full of morning glories and your night be full of good movies and tasty popcorn

[xamaxenta]

STOP THAT'S SO CUTE obviously Sabo's player character did Not have a mutually adopted baby brother and Marco is absolutely On His Toes about making a good impression here in the real world now that he has like, in-laws. He is LOCKED IN. Unfortunately Ace absolutely wins the New Brother Competition because he's one of Luffy's most favorite-est characters ever and Luffy immediately starts gushing about how Ace is sooooo coooool and Ace is instantly like I Am Keeping This One. (Ace is Luffy's favorite character to play and Ace stares Directly At Marco about it.) Sabo is experiencing that thing women experience when men are good with babies he needs his guys to Stop being so kind and friendly and patient with his favorite person he is officially passed the safe amount of horny that a human can be he's at critical levels this isn't sustainable please think of his health. (He is GOING to get these men pregnant watch him he will find a way)

Zoro will obviously be marrying into the family so he bows very respectfully to Sabo as his honored elder brother and Sabo goes huH??? Meanwhile Zoro, Ace, and Marco all immediately form a Warriors Bond Of Mutual Respect. They exchange exactly three words but that's plenty. You have my swords/laser canon/fantasy brass knuckles of +6 Fire Damage.

Oooh love this youre right Sabos avatar didnt have any notable family because it wasnt programmed so he doesnt have a typical script to follow here for … family? So for the first time Marcos floundering as much as Ace was but the difference is is Ace is from a roster fighter game that has the cheeseball plot of saving the world and befriending your enemies and ofc

All the critter characters (chopper) call him Aniki yknow its just how it goes so Ace is THEE aniki character so ofc he takes to Luffy immediately but also he recognises him as one of the top players in the world bc

It would be so funny if the leaderboard for his character had a kid 15 years old named NikuNikuNi (lol im sorry) and its one Luffy Monkey who decided to hyperfocus all his singular interest into gettinf good at this game and specifically at Ace’s character because he thought he was cool

Ace adopts luffy instantly like oh! Youre my number one player!!! And Luffy is OVER. THE. moon like YOU KNOW ME!?!?? 🥹🥹🥹🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️‼️‼️‼️‼️

And aces does the classice JPN aniki head pat of cooler older brothers who are effortlessly sexy and everyone loves them— Luffy actually implodes doesnt shut up about it for WEEKS!!!

Marco may be a little jealous about it bc Luffy and Ace hit it off!!! He wishes to have the same camaraderie but this is such a difficult scenario to navigate because his game has no children or underage characters he doesnt know how to talk yo a teenager at all!!!

Zoro Ace Marco mutual warriors bond is BEAUTIFUL BTW 🥹 zoro thinks Marcos wing blades are very cool and tells him your bird blades are cool and Marcos like thank you the mouth sword gimmick you have is also cool

Mutual warriors nod of respect haha

[oh-gh0st]

ok i need to write out the isolation after choro confession i am spitballing thoughts and they need to be out NOW!!!

so to start: choromatsu confesses to ghost after theyve finished their shift at the library and are walking nearby the riverbank

he goes on about how much he's appreciated them since theyve met and that he wants to pursue something more with them, blah blah "i-i love you!" yes. OKKK

imagine ghost feeling like glass and getting hit with a massive sledge hammer at that moment. they were always the one to say i love you, and rarely ever got confessed to about it when they were a little bit younger. and everything just stops in them like you could almost swear their heart stopped

they get physically sick and nauseous after hearing that. and almost had to lean over the bank just in case if they did get sick. ghost is silent for a LOOONNGGG while and choro gets stupid fucking anxious cause this is technically his first confession. they hate it, he tells himself, they really hate it!

imagine his disappointment when ghost tells him to wait a while before they give him an answer...

sooo atp methinks ghost wouldve gotten choro a phone... and ever since that day ghost has been Holed up at their condo and has refused to come out unless absolutely necessary (eg work or groceries) and it only spirals from there. even if choro tried looking into their condo from afar all the blinds are shut and windows closed... he cant see a thing, and he's starting to get worried.

like he is constantly trying to reach them everyday on his phone to no avail. the only thing that keeps him going is the "read" caption that he sees on texts at times. at least theyre alive...?

he doesnt know why ghost is doing this, but they do. theyve noticed him getting closer to them, and all the little things that he's been doing is making their heart hurt. they can't go through heartbreak again, they cant !

they absolutely refuse to believe choro is in love with them. or someone like them. sure, theyve teased him or flirted with him, but that was all in good fun, right?! right...? come 2 weeks after that day and ghost wakes up in their bed, tired and absolutely understimulated and weak. they dont want to get up again, but they have to. the birds need to be fed. dishes still have to be done. laundry... shower... have they changed clothes recently? they cant even remember that.

it isnt until they get a singular text from choro that they snap out of their daze, looking over to their phone on the nightstand. they can see his icon, and the special nickname they gave him as his contact name. god...

its the 23rd of the month. they last talked to him over 2 weeks prior... has it been that long? not even ghost has a clue anymore

this is where the relationship picks back up again with ghost finally taking the step and texting him back. a singular "I'm sorry" is all he could ever ask for as a reply, even if it hurt him so much.

they meet up at ghost's place and go on to talk about what happened and choro learns the full extent of why ghost has been skittish around love and distances themselves from it a lot. he reassures them he wouldnt do anything like that, and if he were to they have all rights to beat the shit out of him for it (his words not mine) and choro finally gets to see the more vulnerable side of ghost. its hard for them at first, but once they feel comfortable enough with him its opening floodgates from there

choro does help ghost get out of their isolative and depressive state dw ^-^ he cares way too much but its endearing to them that he would take time out of his day and worry himself over them. like wow....

[archangeldyke-all]

Icl, I’m just seeing the post that everyone is going on about and while I do believe that transmisogyny (and transmisogynoir- I wrote an entire long-form essay my junior year of highschool about this problem actually and I do think that there’s more acceptance to transmascs in general bc- drumroll pls- patriarchy and men thinking its cute that some women would want to “be men” even tho that's like not how it works- whatever. Point is, intersectionality sucks ass when it comes to oppression and our transfem babies usually get the brunt of it bc terfs and patriarchy and transphobia- read my dissertation when I find it) is making the lesbian community hostile and unwelcoming to transfems, I- a non-binary lesbian- have never felt coddled or welcomed into the lesbian space outside of finding your blog actually. When I first was coming to terms with my gender and how I wasn’t sure if I identified as a woman but knew I didn't feel like a man, I remember so clearly having a conversation in the comments of one of those 2019-2020 lgbt/lesbian safe space instagram pages and it was lesbian visibility week and I had commented “hey am I like still allowed to identify as a lesbian if I’m afab non-binary” and there was just comment after comment telling me things like no, read the lesbian manifesto, lesbian is wlw you’re not a lesbian anymore bc you aren't a woman anymore, and amongst it all was ONE one singular person who explained that I could still identify with lesbian however there was actually a flag and term for nblw and that was trixic. From that day on, that was what I identified with. When family members ask, I say I’m queer. When people my age, in the community or not, ask, I say trixic or non-binary lesbian. To this day, I sometimes feel unwelcome among lesbians bc there are many out there who still think the way those people did, but like one of the anons said, the problem with transfem/masc/nonbinary acceptance is more nuanced and boils down to transphobia as a whole if we want to just make it black and white. I hope this didn't come off as me trying to make the convo about me and enby ppl and our struggle but like that other anon said that post felt very black and white and tone wise it felt a little erasive to me. I don't see why we have to erase the struggle of other trans people in the community to uplift and start changing the struggle for another. It’s like the suffragettes doing everything in their power to stop the same black people they helped free from getting the vote before them. It’s a battle of the oppressed when solidarity matters so much more. Instead of saying “well this group has it worse, include them more” we could’ve just said something like “if we’ve got people genuinely thinking about making the lesbian community a safer space for non-women, we can make it a safer space for the women as well, trans or otherwise.” Anyway, i’ve typed and said enough I think so yeah… my thoughts. Be nice about them, I’m willing to take constructive conversation about them.

oh mars, this broke my heart reading. first of all i'm glad this blog has become a safe space for you, and second of all i'm so sorry you went through what was probably a horribly isolating experience on that insta page.

yeah i think i could see how that post was a little black and white-- especially coming from your perspective where you yourself have been unwelcome in lesbian spaces because you're nonbinary. it's like you said: trans women are at that unique intersection of transphobia and misogyny, and i think the main point of that post was supposed to be that even in the most 'inclusive' spaces, trans women can still be unwelcome. but i agree with what you said, comparing oppression to find the biggest victim isn't productive at all, and solidarity is the key!!

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

Well I am solidifying my guess right back to aneurysm in my wrist.

I thought it was either that or a burst ganglion cyst, but the thing you can see about it, through my skin, is that it is right over the vein where you would take someone's pulse, and it's the same colour as the vein. It clearly looks full of blood from the outside, and you can feel my pulse in it.

Cut to the scan today and she's all upset and haughty that I am even venturing guesses, but you can clearly see its full of fluid... But you can also clearly see that the dark area is attached to the dark line of a vein, and in the digitally coloured version you can see the red of blood flow going into it and spreading into the whole shape.

So I am going with wrist aneurysm or a very very very vascular tumour, right next to what might be a normal ganglion cyst.

Of fucking course I am going to hear back from the specialist and see what the doctor has to say though, instead of just assuming my guess is correct, lady, please relax. Not only licensed doctors have some idea what they are looking at on an ultrasound, relax I am making conversation. Chill.

The bladder ultrasound was miserable as usual. I get my bladder painfully full to bursting WALK THERE and lay down, and then they try to tell me it isn't quite full, when it absolutely is and any more full has resulted in the person doing a bladder exam observing there is a lot of "micro tearing" in my bladder. Like lady, my bladder doesn't get any more full than it is, and if you wanted me to have a bowel movement this morning to purge everything from yesterday, you have to let me have cream in my tea. I do not have bowel movements at all unless my body thinks there is more food on the way, and that doesn't happen from clear fluids, sorry. That's just how my body is. I have to imagine I am not the only one.

And yes, I WAS unable to fully empty my bladder, because that's what happens when I stretch it out that much. It takes me going pee 2 or 3 times with time in between for me to be able to empty it and it hurts horribly the whole time. Guess what? When I am not being forced to have a full bladder for over an hour, it isn't an issue.

So of course they had to do the internal ultrasound. Which I wish they'd just let me opt for from the start, so I could skip all the horrible pain in my bladder first.

And when I told her I was bleeding a little bit every time I have an orgasm and the strings on the iud went missing and that's why I am having the scan her first words were "Was HE checked for blood in his semen?" Like the assumption was I was having sex, unprotected, just after I told her I hadn't in years, that it was with a man, and that I wouldn't be able to tell the difference between bleeding caused by orgasms vs my partner cumming blood.

Lady, idk how to tell you that a partner is not required for an orgasm, least of all a man.

I know the people you are used to dealing with are probably both idiots and straight, but please please please cut me some slack while you are pushing on my full bladder -which will bother me all week now- and telling me I somehow didn't follow your instructions well enough.

Anyway it isn't a solid tissue mass or anything obviously cancerous at least, it looked a little too consistently dark even to be very vascular tissue -no grey to it at all, there was a singular white spot though- and has defined edges, so I think the wrist aneurysm thing is most likely. Which of course the nurse practitioner ordering the scan told me it couldn't possibly be... Then why is it on my vein, full of blood and pulsing with my heart?

Anyway, I need to pee, again, again, again, again...

[beebeetheclown]

I’m sorry but I’m feeling really sad about everything. So much horrible things have happened to me and I would like to speak of it here as I have no one here in my life who will help, listen, and understand.

The one thing that makes this whole ghosting thing this bad is the that I am not the type to easily laugh it off and find another date or try again. For an odd reason, my attractions and taste is very complicated, so I do not find myself attracted to very many people. So for this one guy, who I’ve liked since the tenth grade, to lead me on and then ignore me the date of kind of makes me feel sad.

I wrote of him in my diary back in high school, telling the diary how pretty I thought he was. Then I practised for the whole week on what I’d say and ask him. I imagined what our second date would be then the next one after that. I thought of things like dressing up for Halloween together, thought of making him a beaded bracelet of his favorite color.

I was so nervous and scared, but I told myself that I’d push myself and do it. I told my therapist all about it, had a big smile on my face along with pink blushing cheeks. Me and my therapist were both so excited for me.

Every single friend group I’ve been in has been toxic towards me since the fifth grade. I don’t know how I’ve gotten so unlucky. Sure, I may have not been so perfect, but it gave them no right to do what they all did. Each friend or friend group hurt me so badly in different kinds of ways. I never knew how serious it all was until I told doctors and therapists about it. The saddened looks on their faces.

I realize now the same thing is starting to happen with men. Every single man I’ve been interested in me because of my so called “innocence” and “cuteness” is “easy” for them to take advantage of. They all want me to cure the tents in their pants and that’s it. Every single man. It’s always about sex. Not one singular one has shown interest in me over my sex and body. Even my first ever date, thinking back on it now, it’s weird to think about. I hardly even knew the guy, and his hands were all over me already. Then he made out with me though I told him I never had kissed anyone. And when dropping me off at the doors to the stairs which led to the dorms he asked “is this where I have to stop following you?” basically insisting that he wouldn’t mind coming up to my bedroom.

Why must they be this way? Can’t I make you a bracelet, go for ice cream and try each others flavor, go to a street festival, and the only touch you think about is holding my hand?

I cannot tell anyone about my uncle and his sexual “jokes” towards me because I know they won’t side with me. His “jokes” are always focused on me, he only starts a conversation if it’s about me, he only takes the seat of its next to me. Can’t I visit with family and not feel like that shy, scared, and uncomfortable little girl again?

I have been through so much, so much of these people, getting the same outcome, I am not quite sure how many more times I can take this defeat without giving up.

[dracanianwyvern]

Okay uhm... wow there's... alot to go over with what has went down in the TPC tag...

I... really do not want to have to deal with it but since this has affected both people I follow AND the writer of a fic I enjoy... yeah no I'm addressing this bullshit.

What am I adressing? The most... recent bullshit. Yeah, it's the captain-kretsnik, cintagonisupset, prettybeegkittykat, trg-jsab-zone, and goldythehamster situation.

I am... mutuals with one of the people involved, so I believe I can have a say in this. If multiple of those involved want me to take this post down, I will. I just... want to get this bullshit off my mind.

I'll... put a cut down so you can read if you want as this will be a VERY long post most likely.

Alright welp... I'll start with my... initial reaction which... I regret.

I did not know the full extent of the situation when I did it, I thought it was only one person who had been labelled "problematic" not THREE. So I had blocked em... and sent an anon ask I fucking regret sending as it was my first 'anon hate'. I was tired at the time, and fuck if I could go back and not send it I would of.

I have since unblocked this person... no I'm not saying who but... they most likely know from one fact: I triple encrypted the message. You know who you are, I am deeply sorry I sent it you may block me I will understand.

As for my current reaction?

I... I don't know anymore. I really fucking don't.

I just wanted to enjoy my fucking time on tumblr. Yet here I am having technically contributed to drama, even if it was just one anon ask, when I didn't know the full extent.

I... I really wish none if this happened in the first place. Especially since one of my mutuals was one of the initiators of the drama.

And you know what? I've had enough of it all really. Yeah it's only been a day, but I can't stand people not respecting others. You're really going to block and call out somebody just over A FUCKING OPINION????

I shouldn't of acted, yet I had. But from now on, I refuse to partake in this drama any longer. I do have my own opinion on the shit that kickstarted it.

Tpc by DEFINITION is an au. It is not its own seperate thing, and I no longer give a singular shit if I get blocked for this. If I do? I won't fucking care. Because I am sick to death of drama to be honest.

The other two have no right to gatekeep tags over a fucking opinion, and to be fair, nobody really does.

My support in this situation went from my mutual captain-kretsnik and the other inutiator of the drama, cintagonisupset. To prettybeegkittykat, trg-jsab-zone, and goldythehamster.

I dont give a shit if I'm blocked by my mutual. I really don't.

Please, just... leave me the fuck alone for a good week or two. Good day, and I hope this blows over soon enough.

[thecoddaughter]

Lungs by F&TM as Empires S1 Characters

*disclaimer I only have watched a few perspectives so they are biased around those characters and those characters interactions and the wiki page*

*also this is a longer album than I thought, so this is a LONG post (hence collapsed post) and there are some character repeats*

Dog Days Are Over - The Ocean Queen

This song reminds me of what her mindset would be like while losing her memory

Rabbit Heart - Gem the Wizard

We’ve been over this one, there's a beautiful piece of art by @happyrome0 for the cover <3

I’m Not Calling You a Liar - The Copper King

Idk why really, kinda because of the cod alliance but befriending the twins. Not really his mindset, but what people think about him? Again, not really sure.

Howl - Shrub Berry

Her whole wolf vibe kinda falls under this song. "If you could only see the beast you made me" and "Like some child processed, the beast howls in my veins"

[note: this song immediately makes me think of Flower Husbands, but the context isn’t in this universe {“be careful of the curse that falls on young lovers’}]

Kiss With a Fist - Emperor Joey

I feel like I don’t need to explain this one… but I will with one word: Xornoth

Girl With One Eye - Dark King Sausage

Um, I am just gonna leave this quote “I took it home and watched it wither and die” and “my reputation's kinda clouded with dirt”

Drumming Song - The Codfather

I feel like it could be about the Cod constantly talking to him and his inevitable destiny, also “as the water fills my mouth, it couldn’t wash the echoes out”

Between Two Lungs - The Mezalean King and The Ocean Queen

This song gives soulmates vibes and those two are forever married in every universe (even when they aren’t)

Cosmic Love - The Mezalean King and The Ocean Queen (again...)

After the memory lose… sorry

[note: there are a lot of love songs on this album (some can be made platonic or singular) but I only ship like 3 s1 ships...)

My Boy Builds Coffins - Lady Katherine

Totally not bc I couldn’t think of any other song for her… totally… anyway next song! No but seriously, it fits her head-collector vibe a bit.

[Note 1: I was gonna make this the biggest supplier of wood but Joey is the only one who exported wood according to the wiki and the vibes didn’t fit]

[Note 2: I thought the lyrics were ‘my brother’ not ‘my boy builds’ for a good few weeks]

Hurricane Drunk - The Codfather

This is how I imagine Jimmy would’ve reacted to Scott being a part of the Wither Rose Alliance. 1. the water metaphors (which this album has a lot of!) 2. this quote "And in the crowd, I see you with someone else. I brace myself cause I know its gonna hurt but I like to think at least things can't get any worse"

Blinding - King Scott of Rivendell

He's just a guy living in the wrong time, not getting to be with the boy he loves… “no more calling like a crow, for a boy, for a body in the garden” Come on that’s flower husbands! But also his pov of the rapture is captured in this line "And I would hear the thunder and see the lightning crack and all around the world was waking, I never could go back." !!!!!

You’ve Got the Love - The Codfather

The date… “When food is gone you are my daily meal. When friends are gone, I know my savior's love is real”

Swimming - The Seablings

So this is before they remembered who they were and just that they felt like they were missing something.

Heavy in Your Arms - Count fWhip

I feel like this is what would play as fWhip found Sausage’s body in the Blood Circle and obviously blame himself… So technically it is sung from Sausage's POV. I am going to give big quotes for this one:

"And is it worth the wait, all this killing time? Are you strong enough to stand? Protecting both your heart and mine... Who is the betrayer? Who's the killer in the crowd? The one who creeps in corridors and doesn't make a sound."

"This will be my last confession 'I love you' never felt like any blessing. Whisper it is like it's a secret, only to condemn the one who hears it with a heavy heart."

[note: I wanted to say Jimmy cuz the river metaphor but as stated before there are a lot of water metaphors in this album]

Falling - Queen Pearl

The falling without fear metaphor reminds me of the Xornoth fights, but this line “This is a song for a scribbled out name and my love keeps writing again and again” reminds me of her feelings toward Sausage)

Are You Hurting the One You Love? - King Sausage

This feels just right… here are some of my favorite lines: “you say you’ve found Heaven, but you can’t find God” “bite your tongue til it tastes like blood” and “was it something you could not stop”)

Addicted to Love - Queen Pearl and King Sausage

All about Xornoth…

Pearl: “you like to think that you’re immune to this stuff. Its closer to the truth to say you can’t get enough.”

Sausage: “The lights are on, but you're not home. Your mind is not your own. Your heart sweats, your body shakes.”

Bird Song - The Codfather

This is about killing all the Cod and the Godfather head drama. Not sold on this one though, but it fits Jimmy's crazed and frantic tone when things go wrong.

[note: this song reminded me of Monster Hunter Katherine and I almost put that bc I had my seasons mixed up]

Hospital Beds - Queen Pearl and King Sausage

Oh, come on! The song is about fire and dying friends! “I did not choose him, he did not choose me. We have no chance of recovery” and “Put out the fire on us. Bring your buckets by the dozen.”

Hardest of Hearts - The Codfather and King Scott of Rivendell

This is all about love that hurts you because you are emotionally unavoidably (which is both of them). “the sweetest of words have the bitterest taste” “Darling heart I loved you from the start, but that’s no excuse for the state I’m in” and “my heart swells like the water at a wave, can’t stop myself before its too late”

[coleyo]

BITTW CHAPTER 22

Twilight soon fell upon the people, most lights were out; it was dead silent. The only one up at the time was master leonardo or so he thought.

   The man sat at the table, so much happened in just one singular day, so much that he could bearly comprehend.. Its been a wild ride ever since Mikey came along, but luckily, his appearance was a blessing in disguise. At least Sesnei Angelo got an opportunity to redeem himself.

  Suddenly, footsteps echoed throughout the halls, cauding Leonardo to sit up straight. In came Donnie, A smile plastered onto his face with his hands behind his back.

   "..What are you doing here." Growled Leo, he'd get defensive almost immediately.

  Donatello's smile would twist into a frown, he'd glare. "..Leon. you're up late."

"-I thought you were leaving.."

Leo furrowed his brows as Donnie took a seat across from him. "Pushing me away, are you? What a classical move." Leon fell silent until Donnie gave an efficient answer. "I want to see my little brother, Leo. I want to make sure he's okay."

Donnie flinched lightly as Leo stood and slammed his hands down on the table,

"You decide to walk back into his life just as he's getting better only to leave again? What a joke you are. I bet you've influenced the kid too.." "-Who, Mikey? Oh, Mikey... A sweet one, isn't he?" The man grinned.. Leo stared in disbelief before asking, ".. How long have you two been interacting.." "Oh, I don't know Leo.. a few weeks? A month? Heck, even more.. not to long ago we said our goodbyes to big mama.." Leo froze; his expression softened shortly after. Donnie slowly rose from his position..

"You knew we were alive Leo. Why did you lie. Do you know how hurt our.. dear brother be if he figured out you've lied? How hurt would he be if he knew that we were alive, but you... Oh, you. You were selfish. You wanted Angelo to stay unhappy.." "N-no, that's not what i--" "Mikey told me how bad his state was at the time, he was hurting and what did you do? NOTHING." "..Thats not true, I tried to help--" "-Hah! As if." Donnie smiled with glee. "EIGHTEEN YEARS OF ANGELOS LIFE WAS WASTED BECAUSE OF YOU--" "-And thirty nine with you. You were never there for him.."

Silence lingered between the Brothers until Donnie spoke.. "I will be in my old lab, making a new limb for Angelo.. it won't be long.. a few hours. All night maybe."

  Donnie eyed Leo up and down, "-Or more.." he sighed before begining to walk off, before suddenly pausing.

"We used to be close, you and I.. maybe, Just maybe.. if you would think about how Angelo, our baby brother felt, just for once, we could be a family.. or atleast half of a family. Me, you, Casey, Angelo... Mikey."

With that's said, Donnie walked off.. there Leo stood, holding back tears. Maybe he had to tell Angelo the truth.. it would hurt less. It would benefit everyone. The ninja sighed, figuring it was time to head to bed.. today was exhausting.

7:00 AM

   Michealangelo winced as the sunlight hit his face, he would cover his eyes with a groan before sitting up properly. Their mask was almost undone, they looked like a mess. The boy yawned and stretched a bit before tidying up.. they couldn't remember what happened after leaving Mondo that night, and it felt horrible. "Why the hell would I do that.. I keep leading him on, make up your mind Mikey!" He spoke softly, tugging at the end of his masks. "..Okay, okay.. Or-- ugh!" He'd whine, sitting up and adjusting his bows..

"..How is Sensei doing.."

The mutant wondered aloud, leaving The room shortly after. Casey was, probably training with master Leonardo again-- or, atleast that's what Mikey thought.

    The ninja entered the clinic, and to his surprise, sensei Angelo was doing well..

  "Sesnei!" Called the boy, catching the others attention. "Good morning, Mikey. How was your rest?" "It was great dude! Im super ready for train--...ing... Oh.. right, hah.. sorry." Angelo flashed a smile before Mikey spoke, "Feelin' any better?" "I don't feel much of anything, really. Sure, certain arm movement's hurt but it's whatever." "Thats amazing!.. er-- the first time we met-- I thought it was so cool that you could make portals and--" "-So you still want to learn how to make them?" "..Kind of. But after seeing what happened to you I'm not too sure if I want to anymore.."

"Thats understandable. I really didn't want to make portals myself either, I always feared my own power, never knew how to manage it. but now.. nothing's really changed." "I mean.. at least you have some control?"

"..yeah.. you're right.." the mutant smiled.. "..what happened with you and mondo last night?" "..Wait what!?" Mikey was taken aback, how could he know!?

"Apparently hugging and muninn were sneakin' around. They put lots of detail into their story.." Angelo said with a hint of concern, Mikey's face reddened as he laughed, "It- it was nothing hah! Just -- best friends activities yo'! Nothin' more dude." "Right. Y'know, if you want advice on couples and stuff--" "-We aren't a couple!" Mikey interrupted, this was extremely embarrassing.. "Well-- I dunno, I kind of want to say yes but at the same time-- I'm not sure dude, I can't leave him hangin' like that all the time! You have to help me, I'm sure you've had some-- similar problem!"  "Well.." Angelo trailed off before the door suddenly opened, causing the two to end their conversation. It was Leo!..and.. Donnie? The purple one held a bag in hand.

  "Dee'!" Mikey chirped, while Angelo stared in disbelief. "I-..Donnie?" The mutant mumbled, "..Are you feeling better, Miguel..?" Angelo held back tears and smiled, nodding eagerly. "..i- I thought you died.. I mean-- I was begining to think--" "Its okay now, Angelo.." "..A- are you leaving again.." "..Not quite." Donnie smirked before looking down at the object held. "Oh and!-- about your leg.. I kind of made a replacement for it.. you like robotic parts?" The older one teased, Mikey's eyes lit up. "Robotic parts?" He chimed in, peaking over donatellos shoulder.

"..That was fast." Angelo sat up as donnie pulled out the supply, begining to alter his brother. "Oh and Leo , about your arm, I.. kind of made something for you too. You're welcome. I'll work on you afterwards." Donnie gave a half smile. Leo sighs, "..Thank you?"

As the adults engaged in conversation, well, mainly Donnie and Angelo, Mikey snuck out of the room and made his way down the hall to find mondo,,

Maybe Mikey did make up his mind..

In the matter of seconds Mikey would spot mondo in the main room, sitting at a table and stroking mayhems fur lightly. Nobody else was in sight.. Mikey clenched his fist and sighed, before hesitantly approaching the gecko.

"Hey, mondo!.." Mikey put on a smile and sat next to the boy, mondo perked his head up and gave a smile back. "Hey Mike'..." Mondo muttered, devastating silence lingered between the two. They had everything, yet nothing to say to each other. "Mondo, I was thinking about what you said last night, and.. I don't want to leave you hanging anymore, I don't want to keep leading you on by being so.. I don't know, stubborn?" "What are you tryna' say?" The mutant said, resting his hand on mayhems back. "..Despite everything that's going on right now, I.. would..maybe use.. somebody to comfort me right now, i- want to be.. together? Maybe? Finally?.." Mikey tried to avoid eye contact, but that didn't work out too well . Mayhem let out a displeased noise, then up and left. Mondo stared at Mikey, processing what he just said "-You.. you're not-- unsure this time?" "I'm not unsure, I'm positive, but.. scared.." a smile appeared on mondos face as Mikey sat closer. ".. So you're my boyfriend huh?" "..Mhm.. I- I mean I kind of like the term girlfriend but-- either or is fine, I don't really care!

Mondo chuckled and held Mikey's hand tightly, "This is really cheesy but.. you're all I ever wanted, Mikey.." mondo smiled, hugging him tightly. Mikey melted into his touch once more and let out a relaxed sigh, "Thats all I wanted to hear, dude.."

The two sat in the comforting silence before they heard a sudden crash, a scream followed shortly after.

"YOU KNEW!?" Sensei Angelo shouted, walking up to Leo with an angered expression. Their attention locked onto them as mondo let go, they glanced at one another before jumping up, "Sensei!" Mikey shouts, "dude, what the matter!"

Donnie followed Angelo from behind, in an attempt to calm him down.. "YOU-- YOU LIED TO ME!" tears of gold pricked at the corners of angelos eyes as he clenched his fist, "I would've told you sooner! I- I couldn't --" "-W- WHY!? y-...you knew Donnie was alive and you kept him and big mama AWAY from me? Do you KNOW how much I've suffered because of you?" The man scolded, his tail swaying back and forth vigorously, hatred filled his heart. "I thought it would keep you safe damn it, I never meant to hurt you.."

"I would've done Anything Donnie asked of me, he is my brother, and you're telling me, all of these years.. all of these years I've spent crying and BLAMING myself for our fathers death, donnies disappearance, I.. Could've been.. happy?" Angelo paused before gritting his teeth together, "i HATE you.. now, big mama, the only one who really comforted me, is gone, because you kept them away from me and told me that they were Dead?.. what is wrong with you.." "..Angelo, please." Donnie placed a hand on his shoulder, he was scolding hot.. Donnie pulled away and grumbled. "I'm so sorry, I never meant for any of this to happen.." said leon.. Angelo let out a frusterated growl before raising his hand, but suddenly, was stopped.

"..Sensei?" Mikey tugged at his arm, a frown on his face. "..Pa'..? What happened.." "..What.." Angelo would suddenly pause.. "I-- damn it." Angelo pulled away, as mikey hugged him tightly. "-I- it's okay! You're okay.."

Donnie and Leo glanced at one another, Donnie felt pity for Angelo, but Leo.. oh, Leo. He felt horrible.. maybe he was a bad brother.. after all, it was his fault raph died..

"..Sorry.." Angelo pulled away from Mikey. "Its fine sensei.. hey, instead of sensei, is Pa' okay?" "..Sure, 'kid."

Mikey decided to take Angelo away from this drama, mondo followed after..

Hopefully some friendships.. or family issues could be repaired

"He's strong enough.. quite the fighter. You have until tomorrow to bring him. Understood?"

"Yes 'sir. We will not disappoint.."

[algrolo]

"Hey! Hi! This is ground control! I guess? Guess I'm ground control. Hi! Hope you all are doing alright! Heh. So I bet yall saw the fireworks down here and the explosions and the lack of communication but we're fine! Mostly... mostly? Eh. Probably. Theres a good amount of radiation, you can't step foot in like any major US urban center but for the most part people are alright? I guess? Anyways.

Just wanted to finally call you guys, wasn't sure if anyone was alive up there but hey! I figured if yall were youd probably need the food and such and okay. This is uh. This is kinda stupid. But like. Oh god. It had to be like a decade ago right? Probably. Anyways. I was on this social media app called Tumblr. And there was this writing prompt about this literal exact situation. And you know, I was a teen, bored outta my mind in class, so Im thinking about this prompt I read on the internet and I wrote an entire story about it. There were like aliens and something supply the ISS cause all the humans died, arghh, nooo, tragic. You get the gist. But well, I kinda found that story buried in a notebook a couple weeks ago?

So my first thought was 'wow, spot on prediction random writing prompt' and then my second thought was 'oh god theres still people up there holy shit'. So, abandoning all common sense, I drove off across 2 states, avoiding metropolitan areas as best as I could, and made it to Cape Canaveral which, surprising, didn't look too bad? I dont know how much radiation Im getting to be fair being this close to Miami but you know I always figured Florida was kinda radioactive before the planet decided to blow itself up so whatever.

And yeah well. Place was deserted. Alarms sure as hell werent and those things are NOISY. Intruder blah blah blah, well, sorry, but seems like the NASA boys all up and left- wait I shouldnt just say boys there were probably a bunch of women here too! STEM field! Diversity. You know. Sorry, sidetracked. Again. Anyways.

Thankfully, the computers all had logs set up for the next shipment to the ISS. So hey! You all didn't starve. It took me a bit but like when all the informations there all you gotta do is teach yourself some button sequences and pray that the rocket doesn't explode or something and viola! One shipment of ISS goodies. Easy! Said it should last a couple months. Great! Now do you want to guess what there weren't manuals for? HOW TO USE THE DAMN RADIO. Sure you can look at all the data on the server once you know how to crack a few admin passwords but did no one SERIOUSLY consider writing down how to talk to yall? Really?

Like I guess that's really basic to all the NASA nerds because 'its just a simple call we've been doing orbital calls to space for decades everyone knows how to do that you just show the new guy' WELL GUESS WHAT. THE NEW GUY IS HERE AND YOUR SORRY BUTTS ARENT. WHY DID NO ONE THINK TO WRITE THIS DOWN. Oh wait they did. BACK IN LIKE THE 1980S. Do you know how long it took to find the god damn manual in the archives? And this place is HUGE. MASSIVE. I AM ONE SINGULAR WOMAN.

Anyways. The computer says you should have recieved the the supplies by now. So PLEASE tell me you got them and I didn't just waste over a month roaming an abandoned government facility for nothing. I am going to be so mad if NASA did evacuate yall and no one bothered to write it down. Or if I sent a rocket flying right into your station and you all exploded or something. That would be bad too.

Oh god. Ive been talking nonstop for like 10 minutes. Whoops. Sorry. New at this, haha. Um, is anyone there? And if you are, could you help me get you down, maybe?"

"Ground control this is the ISS, we read you, over."

As one of the astronaut on the ISS you and your colleagues watched in horror as the Earth descended into nuclear chaos. You were certain that you were going to die up there, but even though there is no one left on Earth to answer your radio calls you still receive regular supply shipments.

[dollhouseirl]

"Heh, sorry about that one, folks. Gets 'em every time when I get 'em and I don't always wanna get 'em, you know?" He dusts himself off. He is a little princeling at times, you can see it in his tomfoolery and in the way he never once blemished himself or grew frightening as six became one. A neat little trick, wouldn't you say? As the OOC of Plot Twists, he has many more. "So, uhhhhhhh...what are y'all up to? You doin' anything fun this, uhhhhh"

The trickster consults a fancy new device he was given by a terrifying new, to his unwelcome surprise, sometimes acquaintance who told him, and, quote, "Yeah, we could tell time before but just imagine if you could tell time to go smother itself in its crib with an APP ;D" before handing it off to him. No real explanation of what an "app" was either, though he got the gist quickly enough. He always did; mind as sharp and as labyrinthine as a maze made out of mirrors edges.

"...Tuesday?" ;) "Me? Not much, not much. I'm just..."

He thinks. He's smoldering when he does that. It is said in the higher realms that he once was married to the OOC of Love. How that went is a matter best saved - a matter he prefers to save - for other times. Other times like...never. But...you can see, wacky attire and all (in this guise, at least), why that might very well be true. He's a charmer.

"...did I use the singular looking to mingular line already ha drat yeah i did well"

He thinks some more. Bucket Farce is prone to thinking far too much. If he looks thoughtless, it is because he has perfected the precise speed of thought that makes thought so effortless that it looks like he isn't having them when, in fact, he's having a lot of them. Mile a minute, this guy.

"I guess I'm looking for some, uh...shows to watch. Games to check out. We, uh, like, we have those where I come from. You could call 'em our lil' shows, our games of divinity, they might just blow your minds, hehe"

He grins without dropping any of his roguish charm. In an earlier draft, the character was more of a Jack Sparrow-type with a bare chest and pirate's coat in vibrant peacock colors, a real "Savvy, ol' pal?" type. He could still be that, you know? The only real for Bucket Farce, shapechanger that he is, is that there has to be a head and a bucket that conceals his true identity.

Do you know how much freedom that allows him? Why, then, do you suppose he doesn't take the bucket off ever?

"Thinkin' it's gonna be, like...anime, yeah? Checkin' out some donghua. I'm weighin' a JRPG arc, gonna be a real annoying about one my best buddy has been accidentally quoting since we got here because it's so funny, you don't get it you guys- He's never heard of Kingdom Hearts!"

He doesn't laugh at this. It's not hahahahahaha funny. It's more, man, can you believe this shit funny. When you are supposed to be the perfect plot twist, to have an identity no one can guess, you have to very possibly be willing to be anyone or know what being anyone would be like.

He can't take the bucket off because someone has to guess who he is first when the identity is itself supposed to be perfect. If perfect is unguessable, the bucket would seem to be on for good possibly.

"Hehe, sorry about this. Call this a little filler post, I guess. They can't all be winners! I really do want to know what everyone's up to out there; there are plans in store, y'know, and I'm - LIKE - so excited, heh ;)"

Bucket Farce winks. Does he really even need to take it off? Perhaps not.

-------------------------------------------

Another short piece for my VN as we hit the last week before submission/launch! Sprites are done for Bucket by the, again, super super talented @lotus-start whose help I am very grateful for! Our boy has others in store besides this devilishly good looking one which I very specifically felt he had to have and which Lotus very specifically felt could have a very...yaoi-esque charm to it.

It'll be a great time! The pieces are all basically in place at this point. I'm having fun in this setting at this point just playing around and I hope everyone else does too when it's finally out and readable.

[burningdarkfire]

yet another writing ask: 4, 8, 10, 19, 33, 36, and 39!

you have sent me an absolute feast, thank you!!

(send me another writing ask!)

4. Do you have any OCs? Do you have a story for them?

yes! they tend to be tied to games/worlds rather than specific storylines - for example, a bunch of my favourite OCs in the past few years have been NPCs that i've played as DM in my dnd campaigns. i have a handful of original worlds too :)

8. How slow is a slow burn?

as slow as one prefers, really, though i admit i prefer them pretty fast! i tend to like characters who know what they want and are willing to take the initiative, but there are also very specific flavours of yearning that i find delicious and when they're done well, they can really hit

10. Top three favourite fic tropes

i love a good hurt/comfort, i definitely think catharsis is something i'm always looking for in fic. i like pretty much any sort of situation that can lead to a "dubious consent" tag, because those are always interesting (and/or hot) to explore. and i absolutely adore vampire/werewolf AUs and i am not sorry about it

19. Share a snippet from a wip without giving any context for it.

"Has Wulf found the body?"

"No." Body, singular. Things were more dire than they thought. "How many got away?"

"None," Astrid said grimly. "But that is already enough."

Essek blinked. The room felt small. "When they do not report back, somebody will know you're alive."

She stared at him for a moment, as if suddenly seeing him again for the first time. "Why are you sitting here? He could have left a cat. A dozen cats."

"I'm sure he did." They had a habit of appearing out of the shadows. Essek put the book aside. "Will you call Eadwulf back?"

"He's not a dog," Astrid said, and she laid back down.

Essek could think of nothing else to say. After a few minutes, even to his carefully disinterested eye, Astrid seemed to be perfectly asleep.

33. Give your writing a compliment.

no one is as good as i am at writing the way i do! it's something i've been talking over a lot with a friend recently, and it's a driving philosophy behind my enjoyment of writing. it's so satisfying to make something and know that i was the only person who could have made it as such

36. How do you come up with fic titles? What’s the one you’re most proud of?

fic titles were one of my great projects of 2023 (and are still, if only i actually posted anything) because tbh my writing is cluttered with half-assed titles taken from songs and poems that i can't even differentiate myself. i've read a lot of poetry in the past year with the idea that it could help me; realistically, i just lie around for weeks after finishing a fic moaning about thinking of a title while everyone else is like "okay, yes, but we want to read it though"

honey melt might win the accolade because it's the only title i can think of that i actually like that isn't derivative 😭

39. Wildest AU scenario you have written?

i mean. listen. you know what it is. it's like 90k published words long (not all of which are mine anymore!) and i still barely understand why i did it. i don't write particularly wild AUs in the first place so its very existence is what makes it insane !!

[dameronology]

the one with all the yelling {obi-wan x reader}

summary: after making a stupid decision in battle and having an argument with your best friend, a confession slips out that surprises both of you (or maybe it doesn’t)

this is a reupload bc i took it down for editing. as usual, this has lots of swearing in, just a pre-warning. enjoy!!

- jazz

They say that time slows down when you’re about to die - that your life flashes before your very eyes. You’re supposed to see the thing you love most, the people you value most. It was meant to be a final moment filled with a lifetime of emotions, of memories; regrets and mistakes; unfulfilled wishes and incomplete to do lists. The way it was described was hauntingly poetic, the sort of thing almost made you want to to experience it just so that you could understand what it felt like.

And, having witnessed a near-death experience in recent hours, you could safely conclude that everything in the aforementioned paragraph was a steaming pile of horse shit.

There was nothing graceful or cinematic about the way you had yeeted yourself across the battle-field, mud unceremoniously flying up around your ass as you kicked Obi-Wan Kenobi out of the line of fire. The blaster fire was inches away from your face - mere inches - and that, of all things, was when you figured the final moments might have come.

Instead, all you got was a hit to the shoulder and a mouth full of dirt. You were very much alive - but after coughing up an unflattering amount of earth and clambering back to your feet with all the grace of a beached whale, the same could not be said for your dignity.

At the forefront of things, you’d been trying to save your best friend’s life. That was all you could think about when you’d launched yourself discourteously towards Obi-Wan; he couldn’t die. Too many people - yourself included - needed him. And, you were certain that if you hadn’t been killed saving his ass, the sudden lack of reason from his presence in your life would have killed you anyways. The man stopped you from walking into traffic on the daily.

You weren’t entirely sure what to say to Obi-Wan. You were sitting on the end of his bed, fresh out of the shower and bundled up in an oversized tunic that belonged to the man pacing in front of you. For a man of many words, he was disturbingly quiet as he stitched you up and even more so when he helped you undress and get into the shower.

What sort of thing were you supposed to say in this situation? Sorry that I booted you up the arse and sent you flying six foot through the air? I had your best interests at heart, I promise.

‘Personally, I am rather pleased with the fact I am still alive.’ You broke the icy silence that had befallen you. Obi-Wan immediately stopped in his pacing tracks, head turning to face you with a bewildered look. Maybe that wasn’t the best conversation opener.

‘How could you…’ Obi-Wan went to say something but his words were lost. He’d witnessed you do a lot of stupid things but this one took the cake. This was stupid thing to end all stupid things. ‘Why would you - actually, I don’t even know what to say.’

‘I mean a thank you would probably suffice.’ You muttered. ‘I did just take a bullet for you.’

‘How could you have been so stupid?!’ He snapped. ‘You could have died!’

‘I was trying to save you!’ You reminded him.

Right. There was that - the alarmingly obvious thing that he’d been trying not to think about.

Obi-Wan couldn’t deny his feelings for you; you’d always been his slightly kooky best friend but maker, he adored you. Life as a Jedi could be dark but you were his nightlight - a soft glow to guide him to brighter things, to remind him that not all was lost.

He’d spent hours convincing himself that you didn’t feel the same. You were too busy running around with what Obi-Wan was certain was a singular brain cell, getting yourself into trouble and making questionable decisions. But, now that you’d quite literally thrown yourself into the line of fire for him? It was certainly a compelling piece of evidence to the contrary.

(Of course, you loved him too. You’d been in love with him since the day you’d met. That was a minor detail you’d chosen not to mention to him - avoiding the truth wasn’t the same as lying, right?)

‘I don’t need saving.’ Obi-Wan said.

‘Oh, please.’ You snorted. ‘You might be Jedi Master Kenobi of the High Jedi Council, Best Jedi To Ever Jedi and Regular Shagger of the Jedi Code-’

‘- you used the word Jedi a few too many times there-’

‘- but you are not bulletproof!’

‘Neither are you!’

‘But I’m alive, aren’t I?’ Your tone was suddenly soft. ‘I’m in one piece.’

‘Barely.’ He murmured. ‘You can’t do things like that.’

‘Well, I did.’ You would have raised your voice louder had your shoulder not been screaming in pain. ‘And stomping around like a pissy toddler isn’t going to change it.’

The most terrifying part - for both of you, truthfully speaking - was how quickly you had done it. You hadn’t even thought about it; you saw red and you launched yourself into the blaster’s path without even considering the consequences. The most important thing to you in that moment had been that Obi-Wan’s life was at risk and it had led to a sudden disregard for your own.

‘I’ll get better.’ You continued. ‘I’m only signed off for a few weeks and as soon as I’m on the mend I will be back in the field. It’ll be like nothing ever happened-’

‘- but it did happen.’ Obi-Wan cut you off. ‘I’m always going to remember that you risked your life for me without even having to think about it.’

Grabbing onto the poster of his bed, you pulled yourself up and slowly approached him. Obi-Wan almost backed away when his robe inched off your shoulders, revealing the nasty red gash just by your collarbone. The idea quickly slipped away, however, when you rested your hands on his forearms, hands slipping under his sleeves and intertwining your fingers.

‘What else would I do?’ You softly laughed. ‘It’s you, Obi.’

‘Would you have done the same for someone else?’ He asked. ‘For Anakin? Or for Ahsoka?’

You faltered slightly, grip on him loosening a tiny bit. ‘Of course.’

‘Y/N.’

‘What?’

‘Don’t lie.’ He suddenly jerked his hands away from you, spinning around on his heel so that you were suddenly facing his back.

‘Fine.’ You grumbled. ‘I would only do it for you. I would only blindly throw myself in front of a bullet for you. Not anyone else. Not a single soul. Does that make you happy? Does that inflate your ego enough, Kenobi-’

‘- that’s not what this is about.’

‘Then tell me!’ You let out a small groan of pain as you grabbed him by the material of his shirt, using every last ounce of energy to make him look at you again. ‘Tell me what it’s about because you are not making sense and I am the world’s leading expert in that field.’

‘It’s not about anything.’

‘Oh, bullshit!’ You whacked his arm, adrenaline worming its way into your tired body and finally allowing you to raise your voice. ‘I just saved your fucking life and you’re acting like a moody son of a bitch and accusing me of lying!’

‘It’s because I love you!’

‘Well, I love you too!’

‘Great!’

‘Fine!’

‘Wonderful!’

‘Brilliant!’

‘Well I’m glad we cleared that up!’

‘Me too!’

‘We should probably stop shouting!’

‘Good idea!’

You unballed your fists just in time to catch the material of Obi-Wan’s shirt as he stepped towards you, taking you by the waist and pulling you towards him. He crashed his lips into yours, knocking the air from your lungs as he did. You’d thought about kissing him many times - more than you were willing to admit, actually - but now that you were actually here, with a handle tangled in his soft hair and his warm lips moving against yours?

Nothing could have prepared you for this moment - for the declaration of love or the kiss or the way he was holding onto you, hands desperately gripping to your waist as though you were about to slip away into the darkness of the galaxy and leave him alone forever. Just a few hours ago, that had been a very real possibility.

You’d admitted to yourself earlier that you probably couldn’t have survived in a world without Obi-Wan Kenobi. Little did you know that he’d admitted to himself years before that he couldn’t have survived without you.

‘I love you.’ His words were softer now, barely a whisper against your lips as pressed his forehead to yours.

‘If I’d known that almost dying was all it took to make you tell me, I would have done it years-’

‘-Y/N.’ He groaned.

‘Sorry.’ You smiled softly. ‘I love you too.’