#sorry for a lot of censors I just don’t want to be found LMAO

[byakuyasdarling]

What I’m gathering as the prevailing issue of Haz//bin Hot//el which I PRAY is just the first episode, is Ang//el is so flat as a character. There is very little depth thus far, though it is just episode 1. A lot of the strongest characters don’t / and or hardly swear. I know it’s appropriate for A//dam and Hu//sk but I would LIMIT it to those characters exclusively so it differentiates their characterisation clearer. I don’t see any reason for a background character, Cha//rlie, or Va//ggie to swear consistently, nor the other leads. It really just interrupts the flow of the show. It has a lot of potential but it seems like it’s not explored.

I have hope as it’s just episode 1, and these rather large issues (that were COMPLETELY AND EASILY AVOIDABLE) are just temporary.

[sheluvslani]

Not What It Looks Like Pt. 1

Request: Omg Lani, I’m so fucking high rn and I gots an idea. What about a ghostface Amber fic where she breaks into r’s house as ghostface. I kinda want it to be like in scream 1996 with Tatum where r goes: “don’t kill me Mr ghostface, I wanna be in the sequel.” But like ghostface/amber spares them for s*x in return. And then r finds out it’s Amber bc of the way ghostface is fucking them. ITS A LOT, I KNOW BUT I FEEL LIKE IM COOKING UP SOMETHING HERE- (anyway, I love your work ;3, keep doing yo shi bsf)

Pairing: Ghostface!Amber x fem!reader

Summary: Ghostface breaks into r’s apartment, fearing for her life, r would do anything to survive.

Warning: Ghostface, breaking in, red text color is ghostface talking, set in scream 5 but with certain characters added from scream 6🤓

A/n: okay Walter white, I see you cooking up something other than that weed :3 I love this request tho, istg I gotta get high more often to create ideas this good LMAO! No but seriously, this sounds amazing and thank you for asking me to write this! (Plus, I find it funny that you censored sex)

You were at your friend Tara’s dorm with the rest of your friend group, playing uno and getting drunk. You were sat down between Tara and your girlfriend Amber. She rested her hand on your thigh as she watched the game, sipping on her beer. 

“Uno!” You raised your hands in the air as a sign in victory, the rest of the group groaning and slamming their cards down onto the wooden dining table.

As you cheered and gloated in front of everyone’s face, the news on the TV started blaring, the siren blaring in your ears.

“Breaking News: Blackmore University film student by the name of Jason Carvey was found brutally stabbed in his dorm. The mutilated body of his roommate, Gary Bruckner, has been found crammed inside the fridge. A bloody Ghostface mask was found on the scene, police ran a DNA test and concluded that the mask belonged to Billy Loomis,”

“The infamous Ghostface of Woodsboro,” You and the group finished the sentence in unison. After the Woodsboro attack, the group moved to New York to live a “normal life”

But it looks like the plans gone to shit.

Amber reached over for the remote and shut the TV off. When you looked at her, her expression was stone cold, her jaw clenched as she stared at the blank screen. You originally thought it was from shock, but there was something in the way her lips pursed too hard that made it seem odd.

“It’s probably not even Ghostface this time, just some random looking for a thrill.” Mindy said as she got up to grab another beer.

“I’m sorry, Catherine Obvious, but have you been here for the past year?” Chad waved his hand in front of Mindy’s face when she sat down. “It’s obviously him… they followed us.” He leaned back his chair, drumming his fingers on his arm.

The room was silent for a moment, everyone taking in the information that no one wanted to hear.

“We need to go.” Sam stared down in the middle of the table, her eyes burning holes into the colorful Uno cards. 

“Psh, Sam, it’ll be fine. Don’t be dramatic.” Amber smirked as she wrapped her arm around your shoulder, her attitude completely different than what it was 10 seconds ago.

Sam threw a death-glance at Amber, about to cuss her out before Anika spoke up, 

“Yeah, I think we’ll be fine. If anything, we have cute boy across the street to help us.” Anika smirked as Sam’s face grew a bright red, muttering something under her breath before beelining to her room.

“Well. I say we call it a night.” Chad said as he stretched his arms over his head.

Everyone agreed and collected their belongings while Mindy was (rightfully) the one to help clean up everything.

————————————————————————

Amber had her arm wrapped around your waist as she walked you back to your dorm. When you arrived, Amber softly kissed your cheek as her other hand traveled up your shoulder, her fingers digging into your skin.

“Be safe, y/n. I can’t handle another one of Sam’s hour-long speeches about sticking together.”

You softly chuckled as she swept a strand of hair from your face. “I’ll try. But if anything happens, I’ll call you. Goodnight, Amber.” You softly squeezed her arm before letting go, entering your dorm as you blew her a kiss.

You locked the door behind you, placing your phone and keys on the entryway table. You stretched your arms above your head, your muscles tense from the game and a pounding headache from the news and the amount of alcohol in your system. 

You walked into your bedroom, taking off your shoes before grabbing a pair of pajamas and heading to the bathroom, your steps slow and relaxed.

The hot water of the shower rained down on you, your muscles relaxing from the aroma of the lavender bodywash that Amber bought for you. The soap suds ran down your curves, collecting at the foot of the shower before being washed away.

When you finished and wrapped yourself in a towel, you walked to the sink to brush your teeth. The spearmint toothpaste lingered in your mouth before being replaced with the strong taste of the cool mint mouthwash you spat out into the sink.

You put in a black bra and a pair of black panties before grabbing your pajamas. The blue cotton antic stuck to your damp body as you pulled the shirt over your head and stepped into the matching pants.

You threw your dirty clothes into the weaven laundry hamper, the bin rocking against the wall for a split second. 

You sat down in front of your vanity, grabbing your brush and running it through the knots in your hair. The brush caught on one particularly big knot in your hair. As you struggled to brush it out, the landline that was sitting on your bedside table started ringing.

“Unknown Number”

The words flashed on the tiny screen as the ringing filled the room.

 Once you brushed out the tangle, you reached over to press the “accept” button on the landline.

“Hello? Y/n speaking. ” You called out as you ran a hand through your hair.

“Hello? Is Maria there?” The voice on the other line was adenoidal and croaky.

Maria was your roommate who was currently out of town, visiting her parents.

“No, she’s not available. Might I ask who this is?”

“I’m Joey. I’m in her trig class” The caller cleared their throat.

“Oh yeah? Joey from trigonometry. How come I’ve never heard of you, Joey from trigonometry?” You smirked as you teased the poor person on the other line.

“You sound exactly like how she describes you.”

“She talks about me?

“I don’t think I can really talk about that.”

“What does she say about me?”

“She says that you’re creative. You love reading and TV and movies.”

“Lots of people love movies.”

“Yeah, but she says you love scary movies and that you guys have that in common.”

“She told me the other day, she wonders…” The voice trailed off for a moment before continuing.

“What’s your favorite scary movie?”

Your ear perked up as you faced the landline, the bright green color of the screen stared at you, blinking the numbers over and over again.

“Well, I really liked “X”. It’s great representation of the psycho-biddy genre.”

“Sounds kinda boring to me. Have you ever seen Stab?”

“Once, i think. At a sleepover when I was, like, 12.”

“You lived in Woodsboro when you were a kid and you don’t know Stab?”

Now that, caught your attention. No one exceopt for the rest of the group knew you were from Woodsboro. You picked up the phone, pulling it to your ear as you made your way back into the living room to grab your cell.

“How’d you know I lived in Woodsboro?”

The voice on the other line was replaced by heavy breathing and the sound of rummaging.

“This isn’t fucking funny, Amber.”

“I told you, this isn’t Amber. But you’re looking particularly fetching tonight. Those blue pajamas really fit you.”

“What do you want?” You grabbed your phone and pulled up the dial button, as you pressed in the 9 and 1, the voice boomed again.

“Stop right there, y/n. You call the cops, you die. You hang up the phone, you die. It’s not hard getting into your dorm. Especially when you leave your window unlocked.”

That’s when you felt the slight breeze behind you. As you turned around, you saw that the living room window was wide open, the wind flowing with the curtains.

You bolted to the window, slamming it shut and locking it. You ran into your room, locking the door behind you.

The voice came on the landline again, “Come on, y/n… Don’t be shy, come and find me…”

You searched every nook and cranny in your room, carefully making sure there was no sign of Ghostface here.

When you searched under your bed, you found a bloody Ghostface mask, more blood stuck to your hands the longer you held it… it was easy to recognize this one too…

Mickey Alteri

The 2nd Ghostface

“What the fu-,” was all you could manage to get out before you heard the doors of your closet adjacent to the bed, crashing open. A black-robed figure sprinting at you was the last thing you saw before being tackled to the ground by Ghostface. A knife was pressed against your throat from the person above you, the voice changer crackled with every heavy breath.

“Surprise, y/n.”

[domoroks]

I'm sorry to bother you but I have to say I find Dib's treatment in the show/comics flat out uncomfortable a lot of the time. It feels like his whole role is to get treated like shit and fail at everything and it's not funny to me.

Also the opening of the comics pissed me off, it's basically mocking Dib for being fat and gross, I genuinely don't get why people praise it. There's also issue 5. It made me hate Gaz, it seems she never gets called out for her selfish and cruel behavior.

all in all the treatment for dib is ridiculous in my humble opinion. Of course- if you find it funny i’m not going to pull you apart for it, but his treatment does make me sad, mostly because there’s no bigger picture taken out of it for the show, movie or comics. Any younger children that might’ve been able to see the show, movie, or the comics might actually be bummed tf out because of there being no takeaway lesson- which also makes me sad LMAOO.

I see where you’re coming from!! it makes me upset too. The way all the characters are treated makes me so upset like on an emotional level- but that’s unfortunately how their universe works :((. not defending it or anything you know. Nick canceling the show really ruined any progress we would’ve / could’ve seen in the characters- and when they revived the movie and the comics came out you didn’t get to see much character development either- which- for me- a person who love’s character development- FINDS VERYY SAD. The creator states a couple of times though that the characters can’t really change- which upsets tf outa me. (that’s why my hcs are so heavy for Invader Zim actually.) ((it’s like parenting a thing you enjoy it’s genuinely insane.))

Gaz is mostly mean due to the fact her dad is never around- and Dib seems to be just too much for her. Also- the way her ‘mother’ (if they even ever had one) is never brought up. Though the way Gaz acts has always been pointed out ESPECIALLY by parents who viewed the show when it aired- they complained about her hate for her brother. Another instance of issues not getting to be solved with the time and creation of the show / comics- yet again sad. I’d also argue that the fandom played a big part in Jhonen’s dislike for his own creation. If you’ve known Invader Zim for long enough- the fandom is HORRIFYING. not to drag *it* in again but Zadr / humanxirken shippers tanked the fandom because it’s either a super toxic ship or literally p3d0ph1ll1a. (had to censor the word sorry.)

The fandom also has incest. which is disgusting beyond belief. I’ve only been a fan of the show for about 4 years now- but despite me posting my art for it, i don’t talk about it much with strangers because of it. All of the stuff that’s happened in the fandom drive Jhonen to literally end the comics with a groundhog day. I HATE GROUNDHOG DAYS. YOUR DISLIKE IS VERY JUSTIFIED!!

A bit of a tangent here but I have my whole AU with a more found family. Zim realizes his tallest dont care about him, Dib gets respected more, Gaz becomes a bit less harsh and Membrane fixes his fucking parenting issues. I understand Zim’s an old man but bro just joins the Membrane family and becomes a brother to Dib because he can. That’s just my coping mechanism for the show/movie/comics LMAO. like I said though your opinion is justified!! I don’t get to talk about it ever but the way every character’s treated and handled is honestly kinda sucky and maybe I just have high empathy and don’t like seeing others upset but i genuinely want the best for these little imaginary guys. I want them to be ok.

[hetalia-reacts]

PLATONIC HEADCANINS !! PLATONIC HEADCANONS !! HOW ABOUT- a doting touchy-feely PLATONC reader with the allies?? Friendship headcanons :3 (do Axis if u can but PLEASE don't do that if you are tired or busy PLEASE don't ♡♡:))

America

I feel Alfred is also a bit of a touchy-feely kind of friend too

Especially with best friends and whatnot

Is either always at your house or telling you to come to his

He just wants to watch movies or play video games with you

Heck he just wants to exist in the same room with his bestie

Will Alfred wake you up at 3am to do something with him?

Yes

Y’all will either be doing mundane things like going on a store run or literally committing a crime

There is N O in between

Since the both of you are both touchy-feely and likely clinging to each other you bet you’ve gotten the same question 1000x

“Are you two dating?”

You both either go for the ewww hell no or a straight faced but sarcastic yes we totally are

But it’s 50/50 if you both actually go for the same response

It’s a game at this point to see if you guys can read each other’s minds

You guys usually make an awkward situation for the person that asked because one will say yes and the other says eww and neither of you will back down and explain that you guys are just sarcastic and teasing jerks lmao

England

Arthur isn’t the most touchy person so having a friend that is can be tough sometimes

He does appreciate the hugs and physical comfort/support but he just gets kinda awkward

Well at first anyways

When you are certified besties he’s used to it and one can often find him gravitating towards you to just be close

Will never admit he likes it though sorry he’s a hard head

No one dares ask either of y’all that dreaded question though because they don’t want to deal with his sarcasm and the lecture that’s sure to follow

Arthur is a chill bestie though

Often invites you over to just be together

He doesn’t care if it’s just to talk, do something, or simply enjoy the presence of someone else

Help him cook maybe?

Even if you suck at cooking he enjoys attempting to cook with someone else

And that also means having fun in the kitchen and being complete dorks the whole time

And also having to order food or eat a sandwich because unless you can cook it’s going to be inedible

Will make you watch and read Sherlock, even if he has to be there or read it to you it’s happening

France

Francis is very touchy as a friend unless he knows someone dislikes it

So having a bestie that is like him is perfect

People probably think y’all are glued together at this point

No one would ever think y’all are dating either because Francis acts completely different with his bestie than a love interest

He’s kind of a mean ass ngl

He likes to jokingly bicker and fight with you

And definitely likes to cling and be dramatic with you to the point it’s annoying to others

Francis drags you with him everywhere

His house, the gym, the store, England’s house, etc

He cant just go alone anymore it would feel wrong like he’s forgetting something

If you’re bad at dressing or have no style he’s got your back

Literally shops for you but also constantly says things like you’ll never look as good as him

You are also one fo the few that will ever see Francis get serious or down in the dumps

It’s just something he doesn’t wear on his sleeve and reserves for those closest to him

Canada

Matthew is not used to having people cling to him

He’s not really used to having people notice him so having a someone that’s his bestie, that notices him the most, and always clings and talks to him is a strange and wild concept

Doesn’t mind the touchiness and honestly rather prefers it

He’s kinda touch starved :/

Matthew is likely always at your house with Kumajirou

Movie marathon and cuddles yo

Also as his closest friend you come to see his ‘secret’ side of being sarcastic and a complete savage

This boy does not hold back with you either

Maybe at first he did but when he realized y’all are in this friend stuff for life he won’t censor or sugar coat things if it’s not necessary

Makes you play and watch hockey with him

Will teach you everything if you know nothing

Matthew is the type of friend to invite you to his families holidays/vacations and come to yours

He knows and is cool with basically all of your family

I mean who could hate or dislike this polite boy?

Russia

Ivan is not used to friendship either as people usually tremble in fear before him

so having a friend that is touchy on top of having a close friend can be a bit much at times

But he’s happy!

He loves the hugs! Loves the contact! Loves having a friend!

Loves cuddles most of all he won’t lie, Ivan loves the feeling of comfort and support when you cuddle him

People do often assume you two are dating because most people assume someone would only put up with him if they were in love with him

Neither of you mind the rumors since y’all know the truth

Ivan is the sweetest friend

He shows up unannounced with food or groceries all the time

Always helping you out without being asked

Like oh your washing machine broke I fixed it/bought you a new one already or oh you suck at this let me explain it and teach it to you

Does this completely unprompted

He’s always over at yours or always inviting you over to his

Wants to do classic friend things?

Like things he sees in movies and shows that friends do a lot or things he’s overheard from others

Late night store runs, hanging out at parks, showing up unannounced to crash at your place, those kind of things

You’re the only person he confides in, you know all his secrets, his sadness, everything

Honestly, Ivan is the person who needs a touchy-feely friend the most out of everyone

China

Yao is happy about having a touchy friend but will always play like he hates it

Not in like a tsundere “I totally d-don’t need friends baka” kind of way but a really dramatic “omg I can’t believe you’re so obsessed with me haha loser” kind of way

He’s only joking of course and apologizes if you get hurt by his teasing or he crosses a line

Only a brave few would try and ask if y’all are more than friends

They have to listen to a lecture with an angry Yao explaining that people can be close and not want to date and how immature and inappropriate they’re being

Totally the type of friend that mothers you

Constantly says you look skinnier than last time and forces you to eat because he’s worried for you

Will not sugar coat anything for you

If you ask for his advice then I’m sorry but you’re gonna get it even if it makes you cry or get mad

Yao wants you over at his constantly

He’s lonely man ㅠㅠ

And he doesn’t want to leave the comfort of his house

Expect a lot of his gifts for your birthday/holiday to be cute plushies he found

Germany

Ludwig act differently depending on when y’all become besties

Like before Italy, he’s nervous, confused, and slightly annoyed by all the touching and notion of being besties

If it’s after Italy he’s used to all the touchiness and has figured out how to show his friendship to you in other ways

Like making you things! Or simply inviting you to hang out!

Ludwigs is always gonna be a bit awkward though

Always shy about hanging out and inviting you over

Many people assume you two to be dating because of his awkwardness but he is the first to start defending your friendship and it’s pure nature

He develops a sixth sense and now answers people’s questions about the two of you without even looking at them

He can just feel the nasty vibes

Asks you to do mundane things with him

Like shopping or even chores

Asks you to come bake with him a lot

It was embarrassing at first since not many people know his love of making sweets but he’s over that now

I know I say this a lot, but please work out with him _(:3 」∠)_

My guy just wants a work out buddy, a spotter, a n y t h i n g just please pick up the smallest dumbbell and pretend you want to work out

If you ask for advice expect him to be straight to the point about it but comfort you afterwards

Italy

Feliciano is a god tier bestie if your touchy-feely

Doesn’t matter if that touchy-feely emotionally and/or physically he’s down for both

Like please hold his hand, hug him, give him head pats, cheek kisses or any form affection really

No one even thinks anything of it, it’s just Feliciano being himself

If anyone did ask if you were dating he might get self-conscious of his actions, he doesn’t want you to feel uncomfortable or like he was trying to be something more with you

He’s easy to calm down though

Feliciano invites you out all the time

Restaurants, wine tastings, farmers markets, gondola rides, just about anything he can think of that he thinks you would like to do

Always at your house

He eats all of your food too, but he makes you some in return so it’s okay

Gives really good advice

Like for his bestie he’ll get super serious and thoughtful about your issues, even spending days thinking of solutions

Tries not to sugar coat things for you but ends up doing just that

He doesn’t want to make his friend cry or even more anxious

Will comfort you though if you are upset about anything he’s said and apologizes profusely for it too

Japan

Kiku is overall one of the ones who needs a touchy bestie but is the most challenging with receiving or giving the touchiness back

He’s a man who enjoys personal space and alone time, so he’s honestly surprised anyone considers him a true best friend

He knows he can get a bit feisty and shut himself away when he gets uncomfortable and that makes it hard to truly befriend him

But he’s really happy you stick around and deal with his awkwardness and rejection of your affection

Tries his hardest to at least accept your friendly affection

No one would dare ask if you two are flirting or together because my god it’s taking so much of his effort to just sit less than 2 feet away from you at the start so they don’t want to ruin his progress by making it awkward

Kiku definitely asks for your opinion on anime and manga

Gets into heated debates with you over certain ones

Is shy but asks you to come over a lot

Likes to have tea and snacks with you while you guys talk

Y’all can talk for literally a whole day

You sleepover a lot, he insists and even got you your own futon with a cool custom cover

Gifts you a kotatsu at some point because he loves them and he thinks you should enjoy them all the time too

When he gets over a lot of shyness he loves when you do simple forms of affection with him

Like ruffling his hair or holding onto his arm or even just leaning against him

He enjoys those the most since they aren’t too physical and mentally taxing on him and it still let you physically express your friendship with him like you love to do

If you ask for advice either get prepared for a harsh wake up call or a stumbling mess of words

It’s 50/50 if Kiku gives you the stone cold truth or tries to spare your feelings

As your friend he thinks you deserve the truth but he doesn’t want his harsh advice to ruin your mood or make you hate him

[aro-aizawa]

suprisingly not that many people ship them, but the thing is. the "&" is literally in the top 3 relationships!! i have not been in a fandom where a "&" is one of the most popular rships. (im not exactly.. against them? i prefer brotp in general but there are a lot of uh racist antis against that romantic ship so i like it on principle for the ~spite~)

i think theres a difference between a ship fic and a ..normal fic(?). like. usually in ship fics the plot and the focus would be their interactions/getting together. whereas for regular fics u can kinda balance plot and rship, but the main plot isnt actually getting together. do u kinda get what i mean haha

no no feel free to rant! its kinda funny that they taught u to swear in yr6 but rip for not being able to censor urself. and also. broke up. over facebook??? better or worse than text lmao.

the only rship ive had started off... not great. like it was an online friend from south america, and they asked me out literally the day i rejected my friend. so... i said yes out of guilt for rejecting my friend bc it didnt look like my friend was taking the rejection well ^^; not a wonderful start rip. went well for 6-8 months then we broke up bc the honeymoon period wore off and i havent talked to them since! ✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻 it was fun tho, but it felt honestly just more online friends tbh (....interesting decisions all around yknow? )

it be how it be. i was still id'ing as panromantic ace at the time. but still. im wondering if i could eventually "work" with someone? or is that just. allonormative asgsggshshd

i see enemies to lovers but what i Rlly want is enemies to friends to lovers. the friends is necessary!! at least in a long fic haha. ...and love at first sight sounds really fake to me? it sounds just like a hyperbole tbh. like maybe it was first wow u seem like a great person and then u like, get to know each other and then fall in love, etc etc

(👀 oop i type a lot. Rip)

oh yiiiikes i hate when fandom gets those racist fans. i’m kind of,,, dense?? about that kind of thing (abt a lot of similar things too), so whenever i see it, it’s like. mega bad. but nice! i don’t ever pay attention to what’s the most popular in terms of ao3 because when i get into a fandom i’ll blacklist every thing i’m not comfortable seeing in said fandom and then save that for when i’m gonna check out said fandom. for example [here is my atla filters], [here is my mha filters] and [here is my ml filters]. (i also use an extention called ao3rdr which has a blacklist function and my blacklist is SO LONG. but it’s an essential so that i don’t feel like my brain is going to rot by trying to find good fics.)

ye!!! i always think abt it in terms similar to genres. i hate watching films and regular books because genres are so....stilted? and ridgid in what it involves? so in fandom terms i think there’s two main kind of genre categories that have sub categories. there’s ship fic, then there’s genfic. no clue if these are wide spread terms i’ve just kind of understood it that way lol. but within those two categories, there’s sub genres like canon divergence that focus on said ship but with a focus on the plot as well so there’s two plots going on rather than just the main plot. usually there’s always equals in both sides. i think that’s what you’re thinking of. the difference is how the authors approach their fics, whether they think it’s a ship fic explorating the how do they get together of relationships or if it’s the genfic of exploring the relationship itself.

lmao yeah it was like. the only way we’d communicate in non-irl fashion because we were both like. 12/13 so we’d have like. pay as you go plans for our phones so i at least, hoarded my credit and primarily used alternate communication methods. so idk if this is wide spread but at the time we never got into the habit of communicating via text. it’s why still to this day i never ever contact my irl friends via texts, and always through social media (the only time i ever use facebook nowadays is to message my friends tho i’ve been,,,, rather lax abt that. i need to respond to one of my group chats but i’m,,, procrastinating). and we were both awkward people, so i wasn’t bothered by the online breakup, if he didn’t break up w me that way i’d have guessed we just,,, wouldn’t address the relationship ever again and still technically be together but not at the same time lol

oh man that sounds rough. never had any experiences w online relationships, but i can definitely see where it could feel like an online friendship. because,,, idk maybe it’s just me but there doesn’t??? seem like there’s much?? romantic-esque stuff you can do exclusively online?? it’s why long distance relationships are hard, and they only fit certain couples. and lol i deffo understand that feel of internet friends dropping out of your life suddenly. i still think of nearly all my internet friends fondly...except for the bad ones. yeah some of those ones ten years ago were p bad.

it is!! i think that people always shorten it to just enemies to lovers though because it’s easier to say lol. i’m MUCH more interested in the genfic varient of enemies to found family because it goes from “god i want to kill you so bad” to “god i need to kill for you like rn”. it’s just,,, *chef’s kiss*

(dw i type a LOT too lmaooo and sorry it took so long for me to reply, i didn’t feel like talking to anyone for a few days ahah i just get those kinds of moods sometimes. as evidenced by my also ignoring of my friend group chat of over seven years, that i’ve been meaning to reply to for over 24 hours and i haven’t yet. yay.)

[all-of-the-imagines-for-eve]

Not Sorry ~ Embry Call (Part 1)

A/n: Oop look I'm not dead HAHAHHAHA! Anyway.... here we go, my BABY!!! I tried to keep this one part but I mean look how long I got. It was a hard no lmao. It should only be two parts though so I'll finish that up and then be done with the mini series! Hope you enjoy all the loopty loops and around and back and forth as much as I did.

Word Count: 6900+

Pairings: Jacob x reader, Embry x reader, Embry x Quil (mentioned)

MASTERLIST

The two of us left the Swan house hand-in-hand. Jake looked at me, next to him, with a deep frown. "What's wrong?" He asked.

I looked over, my undeniably sour expression breaking as my eyes landed on him. A weak smile lifted onto my face, my mood lightening just by seeing my boyfriend's face. "I was just thinking maybe it isn't helping by having us both come in. I know it's helping to have me at school with her, and you hanging out afterward, but..." I shrugged. "Did you are the way she looked at us when you held my hand in the car?"

Jake looked at his feet, nodding a little. "I get it," he finally said. "But I don't want to mess up how we do things just to-" he cut off, his jaw working. Jake had had a brief crush on Bella, leading him to hang around the house a lot. That was how we got together. We'd seen each other plenty of times since I'd always been close with the Swans. Bella and I had played as kids, since my mom and Charlie were on really great terms. There were rumors she had feelings for Charlie at one point but that never panned out- obviously. Now, I just visited on weekends to check in so he didn't get too lonely. It had become habit after my mom died. My dad was absent minded, tending to work and otherwise ignore me. Charlie and I were similar in that way: alone, unless we had each other.

With Bella's presence came a greater need for me. I helped her settle and helped Charlie adapt to having to be a dad to a girl my age, instead of a friend like he was with me. Bella and I vibed the same way Charlie and I did; we formed a friendship pretty quickly. With Bella came Jake, and with Jake came feelings. He was a year younger than me, so I hadn't been too keen on it at first, but Bella met Edward and then began to grow distant and then Jake caught feelings for me too, so things kind of just took off.

Now Jake and I were together and Edward and Bella... weren't. He had moved and she was absolutely crushed. From what I knew he had cut off everything between them... honestly, I couldn't even begin to imagine her pain.

I looked at him, my lips pressed together. "I know how you feel, but we have to think about her feelings too." He glared at his feet. He hated Edward to this day, even more now that he had left Bella the way he had than he did before when the only bad thing he'd done was 'steal' Bella from him- something that had begun to wear off as Jake and I continued to be together. Maybe the two boys could have been friends if Edward hadn't hurt Bella like this. I pulled him to a stop, pushing away how Jacob's hate for Edward made me once again wonder about how he felt for me and Bella - he had said a few times that he was completely over her but sometimes I still wondered - to focus on the discussion at hand. "I can't imagine how terrible it is to lose someone that you-" I looked into his eyes and felt suddenly breathless. "That you love." His lips twitched and I wasn't sure if it was a smile or a frown that he'd almost manifested, which made me nervous. "I just mean, I can't imagine how she feels. We have to be sensitive and even though I hate censoring our relationship a bit as much as you do, I also want her to be able to escape thoughts and memories and she can't do that when faced with a couple, because any couple and all loving relationships remind her of him."

He sighed through his nose and then moved close, his nose brushing mine. My eyes fluttered close and my body relaxed, sagging a little.

"Okay." As he spoke, I could hear his smile. He paused a second and then kissed me and suddenly I was smiling too. We were next to his truck, out of sight of the house, and I was thankful that neither of us had to stop this moment to spare Bella. When he pulled away, I was left breathless. He leaned close, his lips brushing the skin on my ear as he whispered as quietly as he could, "Do you love me?"

I never went so rigid so fast while being in as relaxed a state as I was in so soon before. The ease I'd had just a split second before disappeared as if I didn't know what relaxation was and my eyes shot wide. "I- well- I- um- I-"

He chuckled softly and I stopped breathing altogether. I had leaned away when he'd spoken so he moved back to where he was before, pressing against me. His fingers brushed against and fidgeted with mine comfortingly. "I love you too." He left a soft kiss against my neck and I shivered as he leaned away, looking at me through his eyelashes even though he was just a bit taller than me. He reached out, touching my cheek. "And I promise I'll never never do to you what he did to her. I'm here, forever and always."

A grin broke out on my face and I burst into giggles. My hands reached up, fingers curling around the back of his neck. I pulled him into a hug and he was laughing too, tilting as I leaned too much. We scrambled to catch ourselves, neither of us strong enough to catch ourselves as we went careening as my excitement threw off our balance. I took a breath in and he smelled amazing. He was warm and his smile light up the whole world and warmed my insides. It was the happiest I'd ever been and when I went home that night I went to sleep sure it wouldn't be the last time I was that happy, in Jacob's arms. For just a second I was sure of eternity.

-

Much later, Bella got a lot better and there was no pressure to censor our relationship in front of her. A few times she would put our hands together, winking and laughing and teasing and nudging us and talking about how cute we were and how nice it was to see us so happy. I think she lived a little through us as much as she used our love and success to distract her from her own pain so she could separate herself from it and grow without it there to hurt her. Jake became her best friend and I became her sister, is talking about things she couldn't with Jake, as well as me being over more often since I was closer and also had a closer relationship with Charlie, directly. She gave each of us the "I'll kill you if you hurt them" talk and joked about chaperoning dates if we started acting like we were being "naughty". She basically became my mom more than anything and I jokingly called her that constantly. That's how the parent-besties joke was born. Since Jake and Bella were best friends the same way Charlie and I were best friends, and now there was a running joke that Bella was my mom, Jake and I started calling Bella and Charlie the parent-besties. Every time Jake or I struggled with homework or school in general or family or friends or Jake brought up Sam - the leader of a gang on the Reservation that set Jake and Quil (his friend) on edge - or Embry - Quil's ex-best friend and therefore also someone who used to be a close friend of Jake's but who ditched them when he joined Sam's gang - or any other stresses came up, Charlie and Bella would team up to figure out what was wrong if we wouldn't talk about it, or figure out how to distract or cheer us up. They'd first bump and jokingly say, "Activate parent friend powers" and if Jake or I were around we would laugh and they would grin and wiggle their eyebrows.

It was like a little family. Jake would come over with Billy every Sunday night and Jake would pick me up on the way so the three of us would jam out and crack jokes and Billy and I would team up to tease Jake as we drove over, and then when we got to the house, Jake and Bella would impersonate Billy and Charlie poorly while Billy and I jokingly argued who was Billy's truest best friend and Jake and I would flirt over the table and Charlie and Bella would pretend to gag and roll their eyes and groan and call us gross. The more we hung out the closer I got not only to them but the people they cared about. I met Quil and the two boys began to teach me how to work on cars and related such things. Quil absolutely loved to give me piggyback rides and wrestle me while Jake usually took the lead on teaching me mechanics. For the first time in my entire high school career I actually held a lasting conversation with Bella's friends, Eric, Angela, Mike, and Jessica. I was the weirdo in town who talked to no one and always sat alone in every class and worked alone in every group activity. At this points even teachers had given up- at least the Cullens even had each other. Before Bella, I had no one. Now I had so many people it was nearly overwhelming.

Just as my life was reaching perfection, it came crashing down in a rain of fire and brimstone.

It started, weirdly enough, with something good. One day I hadn't talked to Jake in a full week so when he popped up at my house because I'd been telling him how much I was struggling with homework - I was too proud to go to Bella for help - so he'd found some free time and had gotten permission to come and help me. I'd run at him, completely meaning to tackle him. Except, he caught me instead and fully lifted me off my feet, spinning me around before kissing me hard. It was a wonderful feeling that had my head spinning and left me a little nauseous... but also, it shouldn't have happened. Jake wasn't weak but last I checked he was barely strong enough to catch Bella when she lost her footing, or push me off when I was pinning him to the ground so he couldn't move at all. After that, I noticed that not only was he a lot stronger than I remembered, he was also growing insanely taller and hotter. Like, temporaries wise. We couldn't lay under blankets anymore because it came hard to breathe very quickly.

It all climaxed when Bella set up a group hang out to go to horror movie. Jessica, Eric, and then Angela all bailed so it was just me, Bella, Jake, and Mike. With me and Jake joking and flirting especially hard, Bella was left to third wheel... with Mike, who was only too enthusiastic to sweep her off her feet and win her heart, just like he'd been trying to do since the first day she'd come to town.

At the end of what was supposed to be a group hang out, Bella was obviously at her wit's end. I decided to turn to Mike, glaring at him, hands on my waist. "Can you lay off?" He looked at me, raising an eyebrow. It was during the movie and he'd tried to distract himself from the movie by flirting with Bella but it wasn't working. I'd finally lost my patience.

"What's wrong? Jealous?" He joked.

I heard Jake next to me make a noise that raised the hair on the back of my neck. He growled. I shook my head to clear it and then turned my frustration to him. I stood, motioning Bella to take my place. She was only too eager to do so, leaving me between Mike and Bella... which meant that I was next to Mike instead of next to Jake, who was separated from me by Bella.

By the end of the movie, Jake was obviously as much losing his ability to keep his mouth shut as I was. Mike had long gone quiet but before that he'd tried to make jokes and talk to me and I was completely tired of him. Bella reaches over and took my hand, squeezing it in both apology and thanks. I shot a small smile at her. As Mike ran off to blow chunks after the movie ended, Jake pulled me against him. He leaned against the wall, his hands on my stomach and my back against his chest, his chin on top of my head. Bella talked to me as he stayed quiet, letting us girls go back and forth as we waited for Mike.

When he came out he tried to play cool, putting an arm around Bella after eyeing up me and Jake. "Let's head out." Bella moved away from Mike so his arm dropped and I smirked. As if to run it in, Jake moved next to me so he could put his arm across my choosers as Mike had just tried with Bella. I didn't stop him. That seemed to piss Mike off. "You're really attached at the hip, aren't you?" the blonde, pale with sickness boy shot off.

"I obviously don't mind my boyfriend being on me," I replied smoothly. "Unlike other people who might be averted to having a boy on them in this sort if they're not either close or dating." Jake snorted in my ear.

Mike made a mistake and caught Jake's shoulder, turning him so they were facing each other and pulling us apart. We had started walking past him so I kept going while Mike pulled Jake back. Immediately Jake smacked Mike's hands away from him, flaring with anger. I turned to see Bella pushing between them, trying to calm down a much taller, stronger, angrier Jake and a cowardly Mike who was trying to backpeddle and failing. "Don't touch me," Jake finalized, pointing at the other boy. "And for that matter, stop touching Bella and stop looking at my girlfriend. Stop being an ass, stop talking in general." He turned abruptly and pushed past all of us. I turned to go after him, catching his hand, but he yanked himself away. It wasn't hard as I let go of him almost immediately- his skin was burning. It had beeb warm all night but now it almost hurt to touch. I wat he's him go, speechless and unsure.

Mike, apparently still having not learned his lesson, moved next to me. "Seems like an ass to me."

Bella had to drive because Mike was half blinded by a black eye. Charlie picked us up from there. Mike's last stab was the last thing said of the night.

-

It had been weeks. No calls, no texts, no visiting. Nothing. He was completely ignoring me and I couldn't understand why. The few times Bella or I had gotten an answer from the Black house was when Billy picked up. He gave us some lame excuse about how he was super sick and couldn't get out of bed and couldn't have visitors and that was that.

Bella was pacing in front of my house, having dragged me outside to demand we go visit Jake and get some answers. She was trying to get me to go with her, but I wasn't confrontational. On top of my already timid, anxious nature, I hadn't been getting good sleep, unable to get my brain to quiet or my heart to calm or my tears to stop as I quietly sobbed in bed. As the days passed I began to think more and more that this was a Bella-Edward situation and the day that Jacob had first told me he loved me and the promise that had followed it echoed on repeat in my mind.

He promised he wouldn't leave me. Ditch me. He promised, forever and always.

Bella wasn't having it. "Come on I'll drive!"

Neither was I though. "If he's really that sick then whatever, he doesn't want guests. Okay. If he just doesn't want me around..." I shrugged. "It's been WEEKS, Bells. The Jake we know and love would have shot me a call at this point even if it would have killed him. After how he brushed me off, I just feel like something more is wrong than just some fever." I sighed heavily. "This is a choice. I can FEEL IT. He's actively making a choice to cut me off. If I'm wrong then he'll come to me eventually. If not..." I looked helplessly at my hands. "I can't force someone to be in my life." I looked back at her.

She must have seen herself in my face because she lost all the color in her face and stumbled away. I went to love to her but she held a hand up. I froze as she took a second to catch her breath and think. "Okay," she said finally. She looked at me and nodded. "I can respect that. But I'm going to his house, without or with you."

Another sigh slipped from me. "I can't stop you," I said as I shrugged, my hands moving through the air, palms facing the sky. We exchanged one more look before she left too and I went back upstairs. Bella would figure it out and bring me news. It would all be sorted when she came back; I had nothing to worry about. I fell into a restful sleep with ease for the first time in weeks, and it was absolute bliss.

-

"WHAT?" I shot to my feet, eyes wide and mouth open.

Bella couldn't meet my eyes. "He's... gay." She looked awkward and I knew she wasn't telling me the truth, which hurt even more.

"Bella, you're a terrible liar," I accused.

She sighed, rubbing her forehead. "He's probably going to break up with you. I can't tell you why, it's too hard to explain. But I think you two should talk in person and sort it all out." She looked so tired and wrung out that I didn't even argue. I just silently nodded. She stood and we both went out to her car. She drive us to Jake's and then had to kick me out of the car for me to head to the house. He could break up with me, she'd said. He might want to. Why? What had I done wrong? Was he in love with someone else? Had he simply just fallen out of love with me? WAS he gay? Was there some huge secret he was keeping from me that lead him to feel guilty and pull away from me? Oh my god had he cheated on me? Not even with someone he loved but simply someone that was around more than I was. Someone prettier or smarter or more like him than I was. Or maybe he was secretly a terrible person and the person I'd fallen in love wasn't real. Maybe this was all an act. A game. My brain was racing with too many improbable and dramatic probabilities to make sense of anything so I just forced myself to push it all down and knock on the door before I could overthink it and stop myself.

Jake answered the door. I gasped at him. He was in a tank top and short, not things I'd ever seen him wear before. His hair was shorn completely short where it had been SO much longer before, and- was that a tattoo on his arm.

Our eyes locked and he sucked in a breath-

And then let it out, his shoulders sagging as if... disappointed. My eyebrows came together. "Jake?" I choked out, the word dry and quiet. It was almost a croak. It sounded like my mouth was completely dry, even as I choked on words and tears that were only too ready to fall. I knew what was coming by the look on his face before he even opened his mouth. I knew him too well.

"Look, I-"

"Stop," I managed to get out. I looked at my feet, my hands shaking in my peripheral vision and my eyes watering. "Don't-" I tried again. "Don't continue." I swallowed, trying to pull myself together and catch my breath. Suddenly I went incredibly numb and I managed to look at him with what I assume to be dead eyes and an empty smile. He looked sick to his stomach at my expression. "Bella warmed me that when she brought me here you might break up with me." I tried to make my smile bigger but my lip started quivering so I stopped. "I  understand. Things change. People drift apart. Forever never lasts as long as it's supposed to." Jake mad es look like he'd been run over by a semi truck. i knew without even asking that he was remembering his promise too. His lips parted but no noise came out. He just stared at me, lost and heartbroken, and I couldn't understand why because HE was doing this so obviously he wanted to, right? "you-" I cut off, my eyes finally focusing. I finally saw HIM for the first time. Something clicked in my head and my numbness wore off to a subtle emptiness as my smile swapped out for a frown, my eyebrows coming together in irritation as I tilted my head. "You joined Sam's gang, didn't you?"

Finally he found his voice. "Sam's not at all like I thought he was. He's actually helping me, so much. I owe him a lot. He's-"

"Oh my god," I whispered.

I stumbled back and he scrambled forward to try and catch me but I yanked away from him, out of his reach. Behind me the truck door slammed, signaling Bella coming to the house to help. "Are you okay?" She began.

Spinning to face her, I shoved a finger in her face accusingly. "YOU!" I screamed. She jerked back, eyes wide as she stood, unsure. "You knew! 'It's complicated'? God, Bella! You know how scared of Sam Jake is!" I looked back at him, my lip curling into a snarl. "Was." I looked back at her. "What and now you're pro-sam too?"

"He's-" Bella began.

"STUFF IT!" I screamed. "I don't know why you even brought me here! What, to see Jacob break up with me in person? So he could break his promise officially? So he could pull a full Edward and twist the knife already in my gut?" At the mention of the Cullen's name she visibly flinched away from me. I was too angry to care. "FINE!" I screamed hysterically. "Break up with me! Don't even bother trying to keep being my friend Bella. I bet you realize you still have feelings for her after all, huh? All those promises..." I laughed sickly and the two most important people in my life looked at me like I was the villain. As if I had hurt them. "Fuck you." I turned away and began walking.

"Oh come on, where are you going?" Bella called.

"You can't walk home from here!" Jacob added.

"FUCK! YOU!" I screamed over my shoulder. "I'm no longer your concern!" I turned around so I was looking at them, walking backwards. "So have you ditched Quil too then?" I looked directly at Jake, who flinched as horribly as Bella just had. I shook my head, turning away and taking off running. I knew where I was going now.

I hoped to high heaven Quil was home and didn't mind if I spent the night, because there really was no way I was getting back tonight.

-

Long story, he didn't. We ended up spending every second we could together, watching movies and wrestling and exchanging puns and pick up lines and never talking about Jake and Bella, and Embry, who Quil brought up the first night to let me know how he felt. Apparently Quil and Embry had been a lot closer than I'd originally realized before everything had been messed up when Embry had joined Sam's pack. With us only having each other, we cling to each other. We almost finally healed and settled with our friendship when suddenly Quil was gone too.

We worked all that time to get me a license and then work and put our brains together to fix up the very old car I'd found for cheap as best we could without Jake. I drove by one day to show off the finished and completed product... only to have Quil answer the door with short hair, the same tattoo on his shoulder that Jake had when he'd answered the door to me what seemed FOREVER ago, in a muscle shirt and cut off shorts. Neither of us even had to say anything. He just looked at me with the most apologetic look I'd ever seen and I turned away, getting in my car and going home. Halfway I pulled to the side of the road to break down. I'd begun to get over Jake, but I was in no way over how much I missed Bella, and the huge hole in my life that had been created by losing Charlie was simply too much to bear.

I honestly should have seen it coming. It had been the same thing that I'd seen happen to Ake and heard had also happened to Embry. He grew warmer, taller, stronger. Then, our f nowhere, he broke fever and got insanely sick so that he couldn't talk to me for four whole days. Finally he called to let me know he was better and that I could come over. The call was brief and I'd blindly, desperately hoped with all my soul that he just wanted to see me after all that time. We'd grown to be really great friends, going on adventures and creating a completely different friendship than either of us had had before with anyone. We were just so chill. No promises or forever imagining, but an unspoken understanding that we both hated the same people and enjoyed almost all of the same things. We had inside jokes and had made memories hiking and swimming and doing homework and preparing each other for upcoming tests and in general being each other's wingmen, more joking about setting each other up than anything since we both knew neither of us were ready or interested in doing that quite yet.

Now he was gone. Like Jake. Like Bella. like Charlie. Like Edward and Embry. Like my mom. Like my dad sink after. I was completely alone, empty, with a distant father and more often an empty house than anything.

I'd gotten obsessed with mechanics, picking it up as a hobby to distract myself from my emotions. I hadn't really gotten into much else and the physical tiring the fixing things up required of me as I hefted and cranked and pulled and jimmied and all such related physically demanding things tired me out and kept my brain busy. With my only talent having been given to me by Jake, I was left to blast music to tune out any memory or thought the activity could dig up. If I wasn't snagging old bikes and cars and such things and then re-selling them in much better condition then I was cleaning and babysitting. I was saving money up to move from Forks. I was planning on getting emancipated from my dad and moving away from the small town that had become my own personal Hell. I'd go somewhere else. Meet other people. Make my own family and my own home, since the paces and people I'd come across this far had failed me.

A year passed. The Cullens moved back and I saw Edward walking around the halls with Bella, which made me feel even more empty. Bella had absolutely everything and I was left completely alone. I'd finally let go of Jacob enough that he didn't haunt me. I could think and remember him and only a dull ache would resound in my chest. The release of coming to terms with being alone and getting over Jacob had allowed me to do something I hadn't done in a long time but had come to absolutely adore doing while I was dating Jake and was friends with Quil.

On Saturday's, I went to La Push. I had te same car I'd bought during my friendship with Quil, driving myself to the beach a few hours before sunset. I pulled off my pants, exposing the bottom half of the swim suit I had on underneath. I put my feet in the water and wiggles my toes in the sand. I tilted my head back so I was looking at the sky and then closed my eyes, letting my body slowly unwind. With my the shirt I always wore when I went to the beach, I walked further into the water a while after letting myself come undone and then reopening my eyes. After I was waist deep in the fairly cold water, I fully dove in. It burned and woke me up. Though it wasn't cold season quite yet, it also wasn't quite warm enough to be swimming.

When I hit the surface, I gasped and groaned, a shiver running through my body. I shook my head, blinking my eyes rapidly. A wild, loud laugh erupted from me before I began to swim to where I could touch and then back out far too much go be considered safe before I swam back to where I could touch. Back and forth, back and forth, until my body was numb enough not to feel the cold anymore. Then I closed my eyes and lay on my back, breathing evenly and focusing on staying afloat. Every thirty second or so - I kept track in my head, sometimes waiting until thirty-five or even fourty seconds if I felt really confident - I checked to make sure I wasn't too far away from shore that I couldn't get back again without tiring out and being pulled out to sea again. When I did get on the edge of too far, I pushed forward and swam back.

Halfway there was when I heard it. A huge splash that made me look over. I realized I must be pretty far away from my car, even if I wasn't far from shore. I was by the huge cliffs on the edge of La Push, close enough to make out people at the top jumping, and people at the bottom who, presumably, had already jumped. Close enough, I realized with a start, to make out faces.

First I saw Quil, of all people. My heart stopped and I almost stopped swimming, so shocked by seeing my old very good friend after over a year of time that I forgot how to move for a full second before the water in my nose quickly reminded me. Next I saw who I could only assume was Sam. He was similar to the guy I remember who'd carried Bella out of the woods what must have been two years ago now, and also fit description from what Quil and Jake had said. I looked up next, only to see who must have been Jake at the top. I was stunned most by this. Not because it hurt to see him but.... because it didn't. I felt that same dull ache and a sort of whistful longing for the joy and completeness I'd once felt, but Jake had hurt me very deeply and I'd come to terms with him being an asshole and how I deserved better. I would find someone better, if that's what I really did want for me someday. Until then, it was about me. It was about what I wanted and needed and what made me happy. Jake didn't make me happy anymore. Any good was tainted by the tattoo and the short hair and how he was shirtless despite the slight chill, in cut off shorts. He wasn't My Jake anymore. He was Jacob Black, nothing but a heart breaker and a complete stranger.

My eyes returned to the people in the water, only to immediately notice that a few of the guys were now looking at me as well. I clouding Quil who's eyes went as wide as mine were. His smile completely dropped, his expression unsure. I shook myself out of my stupor, nodding once to him before turning away and focusing on getting to shore. I was done with the beach today. It wasn't fun anymore Unlike Jake, Quil was only good memories and Sam was only the person who had stolen everything for me. It was too many mixed emotions, all intense, and it ruined my relaxation and tranquility.

I heard someone scream my name as I reached the sand, exhausted and nearly falling over. I'd gotten too used to the feeling of the water. I ignored them and everything as I quickly made my way through the sand, folding my arms over my chest as my body tensed up more than it had been when I'd come here, shaking and shivering in the cold. Another scream of my name, much closer. How had they already gotten to shore? My teeth were chattering and I continued to ignore them, even though now I could identify them as- "Quil come on. She's not interested." That was a new voice. I turned, still protective of Quil even after everything we'd been through. But it wasn't Sam.

This boy was much smaller and skinnier, even though he was also muscular and taller and bigger than most boys I'd seen my entire life. Seriously what did they feed these boys?! He had wet hair that was kind of wild and strong features. He was pretty, I won't lie. Very attractive. I felt almost pulled to him, just a little. Perhaps it was my curiosity.

Then our eyes met. The whole world seemed to freeze over and burn up at the same time. My body was both too hot and too cold, tingling and burning and flashes of weird feelings everywhere. I felt the air get knocked out of my lungs and my body released any and all tensions it had held before. I almost lost my footing completely. He did, falling to his knees. Probably because of the bigger mass he had on me.

"Whoa, Embry, you okay?" Embry. THAT was Embry? The Embry who was Quil's ex-best friend and almost lover? Who had been Quil's Jake? Who had left Quil and Jake alike to join some gang for god knows why? Got into god knows what trouble?

Very quickly, I pulled myself together and turned abruptly to take off running away from them. It was hard to run in sand so I moved to the path past the beach and then finally took off at full speed. I didn't stop until I hit my car, my lungs burning and my body weak from over exertion. I moved to the beach first to grab my bag with my pants and keys in it, moving to my car as quickly as possible to take my keys out and get in. I didn't see the guys and thought I was gone free... but then my car wouldn't start. I rested my forehead on the steering wheel for a while before collecting myself, taking hold of my emotions, and then calmly getting out and heading to the trunk where my tools were. I left my bag on the driver's seat, door open as I popped the hood and then looked through what was wrong. There was a knob loose again and I shook my head, reaching over to where my open tool box revealed a wrench that I grabbed to tighten it again and hoping hat would do the trick. I put all my remaining strength in to tightening it as much as possible before putting the wrench back in the box and then going to the driver's seat to try turning on the car again. This time it worked.

With that victory, the same rush as always filled me and the boys and the worries they brought me simply melted away as I stood up, grinning. I moved my bag to the passenger seat, moving to my hood to close up my tool box and close it before I went to put it in the trunk and leave.

Whatever I'd done had allowed the boys I thought I was sure weren't following me to catch up because as I closed my hood I immediately saw Jake and I froze stiff, my joy forgotten. How soon the face of my ex could crush my happiness in the same way that happiness had wiped my mind of him just for a blissful moment. He had his arms crossed over his chest, seeming almost... proud of me. "You kept up the whole car thing. You handled that pretty well. Pretty quickly too."

"Yeah, you started me on a path that I followed. I'm pretty good at it I think. It's kind of all I do, other than school. Don't have any friends or family to occupy my time so what else am I going to do, right?" His smile dropped at that. My expression didn't change from an emotionless, distant disinterest. He swallowed, not liking my new reaction to him. It had been a year and a half though, what did he expect? "What do you want, Black?"

He made a face like he was tasting something bitter. "Look, I just came over here because my friend said you looked hurt-"

"Embry?" I perked up and immediately tried to hide it.

He eyed me. "No..." He swallowed, shuffling like he felt physically uncomfortable suddenly. "Paul- why- why did you ask about Embry specifically?"

I shrugged. "Nothing. You guys always come here on Saturday?"

"Usually," he said slowly, after a pause.

My face scrunched in distaste. "I'll aim for Friday's and Sunday's then. See you, Jake." My expression softened. "Look, I'm over everything that happened. It was forever ago. No bad blood?"

He didn't see to like that. "Sure." Seeking hin again reminded me that he was a different body and ran with a different group, but in the end he was still the same Jake. Still tender and concerned and proud of my progression. Still my friend. Still the boy I'd fallen in love with once upon a dream. Strange. What had changed with us then, if I was the same and he was the same? Then I noticed the tiredness. He looked almost.... aged. More hesitant. Darker.

So that was it. Whatever he'd gone through HAD changed him after all. If anything, I felt bad for him. I nodded to make my leave but was only able to put my tools in the trunk and move to my driver's seat before Embry himself finally ran up, eyes wide and totally out of breath.

"Wait!" He moved quickly to the front of the car. Jake wore an expression as bewildered as ny own, so I assumed this wasn't normal. "Sorry," he scrambled to pull himself together, raising a hand to run through his wild hair. I let out a short laugh, cutting it off and covering my mouth. He was honestly gorgeous, in a totally different way than Jake was. Embry's smile was crooked and charming and kind of boyish. He was lively and goofy and put me at ease instantly. He seemed as fun as Quil but much more energetic and I was almost too ready for it. Excited. "Are you free, maybe next weekend?" He rubbed the back of his neck and I knew I was blushing. "I know this is sudden and really weird but you're really pretty and um I'll probably never see you again."

"She probably isn't interested in-"

"Sure." I didn't mean to cut Jacob off, but I'd already been about to say it when he'd begun.

He shot me an even more surprised look. "What?" He demanded.

Quil strolled up, shaking his head. "SMOOTH, Embry. Honestly you're a disaster."

That knocked me out of my weird train of thought. Embry. Embry who was Quil's. Right? Embry who was part of Sam's gang. Sam who had taken everyone from me, including Jake, who was also probably one of Embry's best friends again now that they were in the gang together and up to who knows what. Trouble. This boy was nothing but trouble.

While Jake busies himself looking between me, Embry, and Quil, I pulled myself together. "Sorry, no." Embry seemed surprised by that. Fair, as he'd gotten an enthusiastic yes from me just seconds before. I smiled politely. "I'm sorry- Embry was it?" He nodded. "I'm not interested. I'm not in the dating scene right now and even if I was, I don't think whatever you're looking for is with me."

As I went to get in, he scrambled to stop me. "No you don't understand!" He was suddenly very close and it was incredibly distracting. "I know what you must think of Sam and the rest of us, but I promise you you're actually EVERYTHING I'm looking for. Specifically."

I was genuinely stunned. "Uh... excuse me?"

-

Forever Tag List: @alexa-playafricabytoto @chipster-21 @captainxholmes @bitchyseawitch @justanotherdaydreamersoul

[astrologysvt]

Chart First Impressions: Joshua

For more SVT astrology posts, follow my blog! Check out my masterlist to see all the readings I’ve done so far and what I’ve got coming up! 💫

This is just a very general reading of the member’s charts — the parts that popped out to me, things I personally liked, things I thought were interesting or contrary to the image I have of them. I’m not looking at anything in particular with each reading. Some of their readings may be more aspect focused, where some may just focus solely on their personal planets and their signs. If you have any questions on specific aspects or want to request a more specific reading, feel free to send me an ask!

damn, that moon.

that moon is roooough. 

lmao, this moon is a lot to unpack so it’s gonna take up this entire reading i’m sorry

with such an earthy and logical chart, it’s almost a good thing for him to have such an afflicted moon because otherwise the emotional and feeling part of himself would never be challenged or explored (unless imposed onto him externally) 

but based on his chart, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s had a hard time understanding himself emotionally.

also considering that capricorns have a rep for being prone to difficulties with processing emotions healthily and consistently, I’m sure this is an area he has struggled with in some way shape or form.

or, if anything, an area in his life he has often had to take into extra account.  

with so many hard aspects, confronting this part of his life is almost unavoidable if not the epicenter of his own personal development.

anyway, his moon square mercury & moon square uranus are constantly making him doubt his emotions. Not only does he struggle to understand them, but there is an inherent distrust of his emotions that he may struggle to overcome. 

there is a constant questioning on whether to trust the mind or the heart. 

inversely, his moon TRINE jupiter gives him a super bleeding and generous heart while his moon square neptune also makes him incredibly perceptive, sensitive, and intuitive. 

moon in hard aspect to neptune not only heightens the intensity of his emotional responses, but he may experience a sense of delusion. He may struggle to understand what he’s feeling vs. what is actually happening. furthering this sense of emotional distrust within him.

additionally, he reacts intensely and notices so much, but his first reaction may be to invalidate. 

his mind can’t trust his own intuition, while his intuition is skeptical of his mind’s pure logics. 

his moon is square venus which would make it hard for him to understand how to express his affection, as well as figure out how to get his need for affection met. 

this can manifest for a lot of people very differently. 

sometimes that’d mean they seldom express affection as there simply isn’t a path for these feelings to be released. 

with joshua, he may still express affection, it may just be a bit awkward, random, or forced sometimes. mainly because, again, it doesn’t just flow through him like it does for others and he may struggle in identifying when it’s needed. 

other more emotionally intuitive members like wonwoo and dk may find themselves moving to comfort without even realizing, simply because they’re so in tune with the others they are just drawn to where their attention is needed. 

more logical and practical members like joshua are still capable of offering this comfort, it just goes through a much more intellect driven filter. “is that person acting weird? why would they be upset? does that make sense? what could have happened? should i leave them alone? should i comfort them? hmmmm maybe I should ask. maybe i’m making it all up.”

and for joshua in particular, learning how to shorten that process is a mixture of getting to know the people he loves and studying their habits, as well as learning to trust his gut more and more. 

his moon square venus also creates a conflict between his own emotional needs, and the needs of others. this can make him a people pleaser, a yes-man, a serial romantic. 

he may struggle to identify when a situation is no longer serving him and when to step away. 

in different stages of his life he may struggle to leave or move on from relationships, and on the other side of the spectrum he may find himself being that “serial romantic.” this can greatly depend on how his other aspects manifest.

his taurus moon square capricorn mars also heightens his emotional responses and could potentially lead to boiling/explosive anger. 

this would simultaneously trigger his softer, sensitive, nurturing parts of himself that would hate those reactions while further fueling his self-distrust. 

we can also look at this in the more literal aspects of these planets. 

his desire to act (mars) is fighting for dominance with his emotions (moon), which can very unevenly distribute the emotionally-charged and turbulent energies that can arise in moments of discord. 

both his moon and mars are in earth signs which can mean he experiences long periods where he is totally fine and very reasonable. they’re both very stable, down-to-earth, and mellow signs and can often find areas of understanding and agreement with each other even though they’re in this hard aspect.

a taurus moon seeks comfort and familiarity which keeps his cap mars in a easy place where it isn’t challenged very often. 

the issue is, is that taurus can be much more easily provoked than a cap mars can. a cap mars can be cool and collected, even in moments of anger where as a taurus moon can 100% blow up if pushed too far, made too uncomfortable, or are challenged too much.

where taurus may decide “that’s enough i’ve had it” a capricorn may simply file it away to be attended to later and more strategically.

and with that, his cap mars HATES being at his taurus moon’s mercy when provoked. this is something that his cap influence would be very frustrated with as he’d much more comfortably depend on his own internal stability than external forces while his taurus moon can’t help but feel flustered by certain things. 

this is why the members consider him a TERRIFYING person to see angry. 

he is so calm and collected for so long thanks to both of these signs, but this aspect creates a tension where his capricorn mars tries to censor his taurus moon and which further activates his taurus moon’s super indignant and headstrong attitude/frustration. 

and once his cap mars decides he’s had enough i can see it playing out in one of two ways. 

1) he’s trigger happy, super frustrated and cannot hide it. either he becomes visually upset or he starts getting short with people over the smallest things

2) he continues to boil until one person steps out of line, and from there you get a perfectly compiled list of reasons why you shouldn’t have done that specific thing and also what everyone else is doing wrong. 

but to put it simply, i watched a lot of joshua angry videos and compilations and i didn’t see even a hint of ACTUAL joshua anger (at least what i’d expect from his chart)

he’s super controlled with it on the day to day and is incredibly composed, which is why he is such a scary guy if you piss him off. it’s so unexpected and sooooooo much more deeper and intense than you ever could have predicted. 

this can tend to be a very discouraging habit for him as he has two parts of his personality that intrinsically HATE when he has outbursts or even feeeeels anger to that degree. 

one being his earth and cap influences that hate the feeling of losing control. 

and two being his softer aspects i mentioned before like his moon trine jupiter and moon square neptune. 

because he has this super soft and empathetic side to him, he probably feels immense guilt in the aftermath of his outbursts and can create this series of events where he finally gets these things off his chest, and then immediately backs away from them because, once the negative feelings have been released, his resolve dramatically lessens. 

not only that, but his judgement on when and when not to act is inhibited due to this moon square mars so he may end up getting mad at the wrong people at the wrong time. 

and the unfortunate thing about all of this is that joshua really doesn’t have a clear path of expression in his chart when it comes to the more turbulent and moody aspects of our personalities thanks to this afflicted moon.

these emotions boil inside of him, both good and bad, and they go every which way to try and find some kind of release.

often times, especially when he was younger, he may have found that he wasn’t comfortable expressing them in any specific way so eventually they’d just explode one way or another. 

this may have made him appear much more unpredictable, impulsive, and hot-headed than he actually inherently is. 

so if you had told me he had a rebellious streak as a kid i’d totally believe you.

often times earth signs with this kind of energy end up doing some stupid things as kids simply to exert control over themselves to counterbalance the instability they may be experiencing internally. 

if you know someone similar who has mellowed out over the years, that’s because they had gotten to know themselves and found different ways of expressing their emotions and exerting control. 

but this is were i really really gotta put a huge disclaimer because i don’t know joshua, i can only look at his mannerisms, the things he says, and generally just try and read his energy through videos and how he acts in a group. 

i think these are fun things to consider but i would never treat this reading as fact unless he were to, for some wild reason, validate it. 

but lets wrap this up because this is getting long.

the funny thing with moon placements is they all kind of hint towards a strong influence on the part of a mother or a nurturing “motherly” figure in general. 

the nature of the influence can be determined based on if the relationship with this mother-figure is either good, bad, or absent (though we know it’s not absent and is pretty clearly a positive influence for him). 

if it’s bad, he may resent this part of himself that’s so hyper aware of his emotional shortcomings. 

if it’s good, then these aspects are far easier to deal with and — in certain situations — can be entirely nulled. 

but most importantly, if neither of those, he’d at least be able to find value in them.

obviously these things are more nuanced than that, but these are some of the few ways you can interpret such a strong emphasis on the moon. 

so many hard aspects in his moon have activated and created awareness of himself that may have remained dormant and unexplored.

i’m only using depression as an analogy (I don’t know joshua’s life) but it’s very similar to explaining your depression to someone who has had similar experiences before vs someone who hasn’t. 

sure, someone who hasn’t can understand the gist but they wont understand the severity and they wont understand the nuance. 

thanks to Joshua’s afflicted moon, after a lot of growth and time, he will inherently be able to understand the nuance of other people’s emotions as well as his own. 

[drinkingdeadpeopletea]

so how does? dimension 20 work? is it just on dropout or do they stream/post on youtube? bc i've wached some fantasy high on the channel but idk how it works and i can't find anything googling it :( sorry for bothering u

oh you’re not bothering me at all! It’s a small enough show that googling it won’t do a lot of good, and dropout is a little cryptic with their information sometimes. 

The Dimension 20 YouTube channel is right here, and all of the free content they’ve posted online can be found there. So that means the entire first season of Fantasy High, the first half of the mini-series Escape from the Bloodkeep, and the first half of The Unsleeping City, as well as Brennan’s dnd-advice show Adventuring Academy and the live Q&As they were doing a couple months ago.

The first season of Fantasy High is a self-contained story with a satisfying conclusion so if you want to just watch that and nothing else you totally can, but the second season of Fantasy High is airing right now live on Wednesday nights on the Dropout Twitch channel. Episode 4 just aired last night. Those VODs are available if you subscribe to the Twitch channel, and they’re also available on Dropout a week after they air. Also on Dropout is everything that’s on YouTube plus the second half of the season for Escape from the Bloodkeep and The Unsleeping City, plus the versions that are on Dropout don’t censor the swearing (which isn’t a big deal when it’s on youtube but it is a little annoying).

Hope that helps! don’t be afraid to ask if you have any more questions! I know it’s a little bit confusing with the literal three different shows and three different streaming platforms lmao but it’s totally worth it

[cyanwings]

i'm sorry you aren't feeling good, my bean! 33, 20, 18, 2, and 1

@jimmy-valmer

It’s okay! I mean, it sucks big time cause I feel like a truck ran over me from the body aches but I’ve handled worse. I’m a WARRIOR!!!

ON TO THE MIGHTY MEMESS~!!!

ANIME QUESTIONS MEME - Accepting!

1. best anime you’ve watched

So for the record, I’m excluding “Avatar: The Last Airbender” & (2003) “Teen Titans” shows cause people consider them animes when they’re only anime influenced so they’re out. But, this is SO hard! It’s like picking my children, it just feels impossible to do! Though, if I HAD to pick just one, it would have to be…… ( 2003) Kino’s Journey!

Why? Well, let’s ride right into the world of “Kino’s Journey” or in it’s original title “Kino no Tabi.”

“ The world is not beautiful, there fore it is.”

Let’s start with the story, which tells of the journey of a traveler named Kino and their motorcycle, Hermes, while they visit a long range of countries as they meet different people along the way. The actual fact is: there isn’t one solid story but 12 short stories that link together not by episode order but by events. And yet the fact that each one of this stories manages to give a deeper meaning than the whole plots from many animes amazes me till no end! Kino finds herself in the midst of these societies - some of which have downright appalling practices. Each episode approaches a theme of society, like censoring, violence, communication problems, right or wrong, the ability some people have to bite the hand that just feds them, and so on. And every time I watch each one, I found myself enjoying this series more than I should have.  

As Kino travels throughout the world and becomes acquainted with the people who inhabit it, it becomes clear that each of her encounters is essentially a separate journey into the labyrinth that is the human psyche to explore one of the many elements that make it up. The issues touched upon in the series ranges from the tendencies of humans to blindly believe in prophecies to the consequences of not having a self-conscious.

There is a wide range of characters as expected from an anime that tells about travels all over the world. While some of them are forgettable, some of them also stay in your mind. Although it is clear that neither Kino nor Hermes is the main focus of the series, together they play an essential role in its series. 

In terms of being a likeable character, Kino has become my favorite anime character ever! They inspire me in so many ways and I’m always glued to the screen every time their role comes into play. Although they appear apathetic at first, they’re a caring and understanding person. Kino travels through different countries to experience their customs and understand the citizens, but they never stay longer than three days, as they’re afraid of settling down, and would decrease of being a traveler. They’re also intelligent, skillful, extremely wise for someone so young and still as unpredictable as a teen could be. Though not fond of killing, they will do so if necessary without feeling remorse. Especially, towards those who attack them or the innocent. Kino has truly become one of the most unique characters I’ve ever seen.

Hermes, Kino’s talking motorcycle, acts as the perfect companion to his owner. Not only are his conversations with Kino very enjoyable to listen to due to the his humour, the series also allows for further exploration on his character. I won’t lie that I found it odd that we were suppose to just roll with the fact that he speaks but as the show grows over time, you do learn to accept it and that’s not the most unusual thing you’ll be seeing in the series either. He’s also the closest thing that Kino has to a friend and it just makes their relationship heartwarming a lot of the time. In addition, considering the theme of the series is the nature of humanity, his presence as a non-human makes their discussions even more interesting. You have no idea if he’s truly real or just in Kino’s head. But, whatever the case may be, he’s a fun character to journey with!

The dub is honestly one of the best that I’ve heard and I’m usually REALLY picky when it comes to English audio in anime. It was done at A.D.V films, which are the people responsible for other great dubs like “Princess Tutu”, and they do an AMAZING job!

Kelli Collins voicing Kino was the highlight of the entire dub! Her acting glues you into her role to her character and you’re just amazed of how well she fits the Kino. Especially, giving the young traveler a sense of maturity to such a young teen. It’s a shame she hasn’t been active since then and didn’t return for the reboot of the series. ( Even though it was a disaster so maybe it was for the best. ) Kino’s voice actress succeeds as the perfect person to voice such a outstanding character and how she brings her to life. I honestly can’t even picture anyone else to play the role but her. Hermes on the other hand is a hit or miss with viewers. Cynthia Martinez voicing Hermes comes off with a cartoonish boyish voice who I could definitely see annoying it’s viewers.  But to me? It honestly works! The way Hermes asks certain questions and their responses makes sense that they act childish or ask very out-looking questions of the situations at hand. Not not say he’s immature. He’s actually the voice of reason but, Cynthia shows great promise with the role. And you’ll see why once you go into this series head on.

Overall this series holds a special place in my heart. It doesn’t have that nasty fan service or anything too over the top like a Shōnen show but, it helped me get a better understanding on how humanity works and even thinks at times. In life, we don’t know which path to take but that’s the journey of it. You just get up and travel to find out what’s up ahead for you. To see the world for what it is with all it’s good and bad parts. Kino searches for life’s answers, life’s questions, and the interpretations connected to them. Destination is a state of mind; Drift along for the ride~!

2. worst anime you’ve watched

Oh gawd, this is just torture! Just when I think I can finally be rid of trash like this I have to go back and look in the bin again lmao

Let’s see…. I think I would have to say…. “ Master of Martial Hearts.” Why didn’t I say the famous “School Days?” I could but I wanted to do a different hate this time since this one made me beyond pissed off! “School Days” at least had the main lead get what’s coming to him cause we all know the douche bad deserved what was coming to him so I was fine with the insane out come. But this? HELL NO!

I found this series out by amazing reviewer, JesuOtaku, back when Youtube was starting to get popular and I always agreed with her reviews. I’m SO glad I saw her review first before stumbling upon this nasty series. First, we got under aged girls, and women in general, getting their clothes completely ripped apart as they fight one another cause why not? Screw plot! And it’s just an endless scenes of just wtf??!! I didn’t watch the series but I saw enough of it through her long review. AND…what pissed me off the most is the ending. Dear gawd! THE ENDING! This series only has 5 episodes but once you check out the last one? It deserves two middle fingers straight at it cause F*CK THIS SERIES!! No seriously, don’t even check it cause it’s just horrible. Just awful!! It’s just the worst anime to me and always will be!

    18. favorite villain

This is gonna sound strange but I instantly KNEW who my favorite villain was gonna be and I couldn’t be more ready! When there’s a great hero there’s also a great villain. Out of the horrible characters did I choose? Johan from (2004) “Monster.”

“ There’s nothing special about being born. Not a thing. Most of the universe is just death, nothing more. In this universe of ours, the birth of a new life on some corner of our planet is nothing but a tiny, insignificant flash. Death is a normal thing. So why live? ”

–Johan

The story focuses on Kenzo Tenma, a young Japanese doctor working at the Eisler Memorial Hospital during in Germany the 80′s. He is a very skilled highly brain surgeon. However, Tenma grows increasingly dissatisfied with the political bias of the hospital for treating it’s patients, and seizes his chance to change things after a strange massacre brings the twins Johan and Anna Liebert into his hospital.

Johan has a gunshot wound to the head and Anna keeps muttering about killing. Tenma decides to operate on Johan instead of a politician who arrived afterwards. Johan is saved, but the politician dies. After this Tenma loses his social standing, lost his promotion, basically everything, and not soon after that the twins escape. The top heads of the hospital are found dead the same night the twins escape. Tenma is then promoted to chef of surgeon.

After that the story advances to nine years later. A known criminal is found on the street, hit by a car. He comes under the care of Dr. Tenma, who observes him muttering about a “Monster.” Tenma extends his kindness to that criminal, and thus the criminal begins to open up to his doctor.

Following his trail to the construction site of a half finished building near the hospital, Tenma finds the man. The man, who has developed a sort of doctor-patient friendship with Dr. Tenma, warns him against coming closer, and pleads with him to run away. Tenma refuses, however, and the identity of the man holding the gun pointed at the criminal in the abandoned parking garage is revealed to be the boy whose life Tenma had saved nine years ago - Johan Liebert. Johan shoots the criminal, tells Tenma that he could never kill the man who had saved his life, and then walks off into the night while Tenma is still too shocked to stop him. I’m not gonna spoil anymore to the plot cause it’ll ruin the experience but WOW! What a series!

On the surface, Johan is a well-mannered, charismatic and compassionate young man. He possesses a favorable of traits and can easily overwhelm individuals with his seemingly flawless nature, as others describes him as being not of this world. This makes it easy for him to make new allies and manipulate them into doing various deeds for him. With such skill in creating this facade of perfection and pureness, Johan can hide his true motives with ease.

Johan delivers destruction and suffering to those who happen to fall prey to his schemes. Johan exhibits psychopathic tendencies. For example, most of his murders, both in childhood and adulthood, have been premeditated and calculated.

Johan often shows a complete disregard for life by pointing to his forehead, inviting Dr. Tenma to shoot him.

He also has a tendency to make his victims experience the worst possible loss and suffering rather than actually killing them himself;

Everyone NEEDS to check out “ Monster ” cause it does not disappoint! Even just check out just for it’s villain and the amazing english dub! Trust me, it’ll be one incredible wild ride!

  20. favorite costume/character design:

My girl, Mina Ashido from “My Hero Academia” / “Boku no Hero Academia”!

“The old you’s not going anywhere with that emo look on your face! If you overcome that gloomy self of yours… let me know. Or else I’ll start spreading rumors about high school debut man.”

—

Mina Ashido

    33. most underrated anime in your opinion

Since I already talked about “ Kino’s Journey” & “ Monster”, I’ll decide another great underrated anime people need to see and that’s “ Princess Tutu.”

“ May those who follow their fate be granted happiness; may those who defy it be granted glory.“ - Miss Edel

In a fairy tale come to life, the clumsy, out-going, and gentle Ahiru (“Duck” in the English Dub) seems like an unlikely protagonist. In reality, Ahiru is just as magical as the talking cats and crocodiles that inhabit her town—for Ahiru really is a duck! Transformed by the mysterious Drosselmeyer into a human girl, Ahiru soon learns the reason for her existence. Using her magical egg-shaped pendant, Ahiru can transform into Princess Tutu—a beautiful and talented ballet dancer whose dances relieve people of the turmoil in their hearts. With her newfound ability, Ahiru accepts the challenge of collecting the lost shards of her prince’s heart, for long ago he had shattered it in order to seal an evil raven away for all eternity.

Princess Tutu is a tale of heroes and their struggle against fate. Their beliefs, their feelings, and ultimately their actions will determine whether this fairy tale can reach its "happily ever after.”

The title may seem off putting to a lot since it sounds like some girly anime but don’t judge a book by it’s cover~! This series has so much going for it and it’s honestly just outstanding! It may be predictable at the beginning ( Had the same trouble with the first season of “Avatar: The Last Airbender” ) but, it becomes something you just never expected; A complex and tragedy story.

You honestly feel for every single one of these characters once their parts are given into play. And the fact that they use real classical music that compliments the dance scenes so well done. You feel the dramatic effect once our main leads come into the spotlight. The intense just rises from the music and for the dubbing too. I said back in my “Kino’s Journey” part of the ask that this was dubbed by A.D.V. Films and it’s one of my favorites ever! It’s not just one or two actors that shine, every single person portrays their characters with flying colors. I was just amazed of how incredibly well done they did!

I could go on and on about the characters but they’re all such a surprise that I rather not spoil it. This is genuinely a heartwarming show to experience for yourself. Classical music, beautifully choreographed dances, and memorable characters make for an experience worth having in all of Princess Tutu’s world. A modern fairy tale for the ages.

[rchime]

October 14th - 15th 2017

Warning: This posts will have tons of typos, bad grammar and bad English in general. If you don’t mind you can (politely) correct me, cause y’know English isn’t my native language and I’m still trying to improve my English

I went camping. Not alone definitely, but with my friends. I didn’t want to go, at first, but I feel it’s like duty, I confess. So, I went regardless. Thankfully, it didn’t turn out as bad as I thought it would be.

We went around 4 or 5 pm (sorry, my memory and concept of time are pretty bad), with motorcycle. There was like 12 motorcycles. It was pretty tiring, my back hurts so much. Not to mention, it was my first day of period, so imagine that: period cramps + sitting on motorcycle for approximately 5 hours, yep that was a fucking hell. There was a moment when we got separated and half of us ‘lost’, so we need to wait for them (there’s one motorcycle went back to looking for them, and guide them to our place. I was in the “waiting” group, so I have to waited for around an hour, before the “separated” group arrived. After that we were continuing our journeys and the road to that place was winding and kinda steep (well what do I expect it’s on a fucking mountain lmao). Not to mention the s" road was dark as hell and scary, cause there’s barely any houses and lots of trees and bushes (again it’s a mountain what do I expect, right?). Half of our team (motorcycles) weren’t powerful enough to ‘climb’ the road, so we helped each other with ‘pushing’ the motorcycles and move the 'passanger’ (idk what is called in motorcycle lmao). My motorcycle was heated up and there was smoke coming from the engine, thankfully my motorcycle made it (and still kicking ass until now).

Finally we arrived at the site, it’s called Pabangbon Camp Ground. When we were afraid we didn’t go to the locket -to buy ticket- staight away, we went to the toilet first (something that I had been waiting for lmao). After that we went up to the camping ground’s locket to bought tickets. Then, they opened the portal for us so we could pass and went up to the camping ground (and the road was rocky and steep as hell, that was fucking scary man). The camp ground was dark as hell, I couldn’t see anything (except the pine trees and grounds), we even couldn’t recognize each other without flashlight. There, we chose the place to 'built’ our tents with the help of the guides ofc. Even though the camp ground isn’t that big, but it seems like it was so big, perhaps because cold weather, darkness and tiredness. Surprisingly I was 'doing well’ with the coldness (I thought I would started sneezing uncontrollably or started wheezing, thankfully it didn’t happen at all), but one of our friend didn’t 'do well’ with the coldness and started trembling so we tried to keep her warm. She wore like 3 layers of sweater and jackets, I don’t remember that precisely but she was covered in tons of clothes (including scarves and gloves). We waited for few minutes until we found the place.

*I took that picture when I was waiting for the place to set up out tents

After we found the 'perfect place’ we set up our tent and preparing the campfire. I didn’t do anything that time but kept myself warm and talked with my friends. When everything’s done we took a rest and I entered the girls tent. That’s… I don’t remember that much honestly, but I remember we 'sneaking’ foods. We were chatting and ate few packs of pocky before we went down to changes our clothes.

*Here's the picture of pocky + myfeet + my friends hands, enjoy...(?)

The toilets weren’t comfortable (but hey it was better than nothing). When we were going back to our tents, I was looking up to the sky and realizing that the sky was so clear. Well, considering I live in the city, there’s lot of pollution and stuff so I almot never see the clear night sky. For a moment I enjoyed the clear night sky, where I can actually see the stars, a lot of stars. It was so beautiful and magical (can’t imagine if I actually can see northern light, I will passed out perhaps). When we got back to our tents, we had dinner. It wasn’t that fancy, just rice, roasted chickens, roasted sausages and… That’s it. We used brown paper (idk we called that “kertas bungkus nasi”) as the plates. We ate together, in line , idk what’s the English term for that, and I hope I have a picture of that (sorry I was too hungry and too tired to took a picture, it wasn’t my priority).

After dinner I entered the tent and tried to take a little bit rest a.k.a sleeping. (Yup, I wasn’t helping cleaning up the mess after dinner, I am a horrible 'friend’ what do you expect lmao). I was fell asleep for one two minutes, we (everyone inside the girls tent) called to get out, to have a discussion, which is one of our reason why we went there. (There’s a reason why we chose to have discussion in the middle of nowhere, but I can’t tell you, y'know organizational stuff). Then we gather around the campfire and started the discussion which is the goals to solve our problems and introspection for us to be better (and certain, specific person). I can’t give you any overviews (considering I didn’t give any input at that discussion cause I was so tired and sleepy af, so my brain didn’t work as good as usual, not to mention I was fall asleep in the (not so) middle discussion -yep, I am horrible 'friend’ I told ya-, and when I woke up the discussion was done lmao). Right after that we definitely not go to sleep (what do you expect bro), instead we were doing a simulation. What kind of simulation? Again I’ll say this is organizational stuff, can’t tell ya. But, the simulation didn’t go well one of our friends was passed out, so we were panicking and stop the simulation and most of us get into the tent. It was kinda scary cause we thought it had to do with supranatural stuff (perhaps it was, but pretty sure tiredness play pary in that too). I other girls weren’t sleeping (except two persons), and we went down again to pray (shalat subuh), cause surprise surprise we found out it was almost dawn.

My friends planned to take a picture of sunrise, but they decided to take that after praying, but sadly we were too late. -Just a note, the mushola (place where we were pray) wasn’t in ‘perfect’ place to take any sunrise picture, that’s why even tho I wasnt praying (cause I was in my period), I didn’t take any picture either-. But still even though we didn’t get the sunrise pic, we take pictures still. I’m actually don’t really like taking picture (especially of myself cause I look like potato lmao), so I just enjoying the scenery. Seriously tho that was one of the best scenery i’ve ever seen, well keep in mind I rarely go to places cause a) I’m indoor person b) I’m broke lmao. I took few pictures of the scenery… and myself surprisingly, cause my friends suggest me to and I’m not really against it, deep down I always want to take pictures wherever I go, but I don’t have any confidence for that (please, don’t be like me, ok?), but asI expected I look really awkward in literally all pictures, even the ones where I don’t show my face, cause it seems like my gesture and posture already awkward by default. Here’s I’ll share few pictures that I and my friends took (they took all the pictures where I’m in frame, so all the scenery pics are mine).

*Just so you know I edited the pictures so it seems more ‘alive’ cause I just took it with my (and my friends) phone camera and it didn’t look that ‘pleasant’ (imo), and I’m so sorry that i ‘censored’ my friend and my own faces cause as I mentioned before I’m not confident and for my friend, just in case she don’t want her face to be shown everywhere without her consent. -I haven’t told my friends about the existence of this blog, perhaps sometimes in the future(?)

After we were taking pictures, we went to our tent again to change our clothes (again), and then few of us went down to have breakfast, and few others were sleeping. There’s few who were taking pictures too, and I was just sitting down with enjoying the moment (I guess… can’t remember precisely sorry). When the ‘breakfast’ group got backwe were sitting nearby the valley (where I and my friend was taking pictures). We were chatting and eating pop mie and drinking black tea. Because of the cold wind and lack of sleep (ofc) I fell asleep (again). After that, we went to our tent again to prepare to go home. We ‘break’ the tent and cleaning up the mess. Then, we went down, and the adventure to go home just started.

The way down the mountain actually isn’t that bad, except that rocky stree, that was hell. The place was crowded when we left, cause aside from the camping ground, Pabangbon have other attarction called Pabangbon Panorama (you can google that, it’s so beautiful). Unlike when we went (at night) the view when we go home was so beautiful, sadly I’m not expert in recording or taking picture while in motorcycle (even tho I’m just a passanger). But almost all of my friends documented that and even upload it on Youtube (I’ll show you the video at the end of post). I can’t tell you much what’s happening on the streets, cause I was sleepy af and not anly me but all of us were sleepy af. Even the ones that ride the motorcycle (the driver) drinks Kratingdaeng (similar to Red Bull) so they can stay awake. Fast forward we arrived at our basecamp. few go home straight away when they arrived, but I wasn’t go home straight away, cause I was sleepy and I learned my lesson about riding-motorcycle-while-you-are-sleepy (thank god, it wasn’t involving accident), so I took a nap for few minutes, then go back hom.

When I arrived home, the first thing that I did was taking shower (so unusual for me lmao), cause I feel so dirty. After that I feel so fresh and clean (no shit sherlock). Actually I planned to wash my clothes before sleep, but sadly my body was too tired for that, so yeah as you can guess, I feel asleep again.

Aaannd that’s it, the story stops there. I’m not a writer (but I’d like to try to write), so i don’t know how to close the story. Sorry if that sounds boring and confusing (perhaps because of my semi-broken English, sorry), but trust me it was one of the best experience I’ve ever have, sounds cheesy, I know, but that’s true. So, to close this post I give you the video about our journey as I promised.

Here’s the video.

*In case you don’y know Pabangbon located at Leuwiliang, Bogor. That’s why it’s written on the title. In case you want to know I am that awkward girl with bad haircut, blue backpack and wear mask most of time.

[safyresky]

Fusion AU Part III: The Bernelle Bit

Part I: The History | Part II: When Elle Met Berline | Part III: The Bernelle Bit | Part IV: The Triumphant Return of Jackie Frost | Part V: Bad Luck | Part VI: Dream Team | Part VII: The Greatest Thing That’s Yet To Have Happened

e n j o y   t h e   s u f f e r i n g

(bc bernelle isn’t bernelle without avoidance tactics and running from communicating lmao @lovelypidge I joke i love these shitty elf children and their avoidance tactics)

(Also yes I have 3 more parts planned, GASP. I’m gonna fucking milk fusion AU. I’m having a bit of an issue with order with the last 3 parts but y’know, details, I just want you to know they exist ;D))

Berline and Elle appeared in the middle of town square, just outside of the Workshop. The elves milling about outside hopped back, staring up at the fusion in awe.

“I thought that the elves would be use to a fusion,” Elle murmured.

“Nope,” Berline replied. “Not a lot of them have met me, for starters. Plus, to them fusion is an emergency thing. Seeing me here is probably concerning them. I, uh, probably should’ve taken us right to Santa’s office but to be honest I’m not sure I would fit in there. I’m a bit taller than I remember being.”

“I’ll handle this,” Elle said, Berline placing her down. “Hey guys,” Elle began, addressing the shocked elves. “This is just Berline. They’re here to give something back to Santa that the two of us went to go grab. Everything is okay though! there's no need to worry, okay?” Elle finished, doing her best to project the safe feeling Berline gave her onto the elves closest to her. The elves eased up considerably, looking relieved.

“Berline.”

“Curtis! Always a pleasure,” Berline said dryly.

“What are you doing here?”

“Santa sent us on an errand.”

“Are you going to be here for long?”

“Depends. I have to talk to Santa, and I have yet to meet this one properly as myself. Which means--”

“You have to give him the fusion talk.”

“Yep.”

“Want me to go grab him?”

“That would be nice, yes.”

“Double nice for me, because the sooner I grab him, the sooner I don’t have to deal with you,” he mumbled.

“You flatter me, Curtis.”

“What’s his deal?” Elle asked, as Curtis went to find Santa. 

Berline grinned. “I like to bug him. Admittedly a bit more than I should.” Berline squatted, whispering now. “He thinks I’m a bit too much,” they said, laughing.

“You? Hardly,” Elle laughed as well. “I feel like there are plenty of other fusions who are too much.”

“Well, Jackie definitely, though I don’t quite enjoy talking about them. Diteline may be a bit too much at times.” Berline looked thoughtful. “She gets very excited very easily depending on the circumstances...”

“Elle! You’re back! And with--I’m sorry, who is this?”

Santa had shown up, Curtis by his side. They stopped in front of the doors to the Workshop, the balcony putting them at eye level with Berline, who stood up from their squat, clearing their throat.

“I’m Berline. We’ve sort of met, just never quite as myself.”

"Huh?”

“You know that fusion thing Bernard mentioned before we left?” Elle said, joining him on the balcony.

“Yes?”

“You’re looking at them, Santa.”

“So you are the...fusion?” he asked Berline.

“Sure am. Fusion is literally when two fae...fuse, to make one fae.”

“Berline...so you’re Bernard and--?"

“Jacqueline,” Elle supplied.

“Thanks,” Santa replied.

“Yes and no. I’m the physical manifestation of the two combined, but I’m my own person. You following?”

“Mostly. I think.”

“Well, let’s take it step by step,” Berline said, leaning on the railing.

“Alright. So fusion literally means fusion. It’s when two...fae?”

“Yup. Only fae creatures can do it. Specifically Pixies, Elves, Sprites, and Faeries. It’s a very advance magical technique.”

“Used for?”

“Depends on who you ask,” Elle interrupted, noticing Berline looking a tad conflicted. “Faeries are all haughty about it and will only fuse with other faeries, won’t even think about fusing with their cousins. Pixies were neutral but we really don’t know much more from there because they’re gone. Elves see it as a special technique best used in emergencies, and Sprites see it as this real wonderful...thing,” Elle finished, at a loss for words to describe how Jacqueline had described fusion to her. It was just special, she had decided.

“That’s detailed,” Santa said. “I guess you guys ran into the trolls after all then?”

Berline nodded. “Seven of them. They tried to eat Elle, not before she did a number on them herself, of course. I kicked their as--tooshies.” Berline’s blue eye twitched at the censoring.

“We were successful though!” Elle continued. “Check out what Berline has.”

Grinning, Berline reached into the satchel and pulled out the snow globe. “Voila. Perfectly intact and thankfully free of troll stench. Now stop taking it out of the hall. You’ll get your replica to keep to your aesthetic, don’t worry.”

Santa took the globe, grinning. “What a relief! Thanks, Berline. And you too, Elle. I’m glad you didn’t get eaten by trolls.”

“That makes two of us,” Elle added.

“Three, actually,” Berline said. “Technically four but, details. And! I have something else of yours, Santa, that I think you’ll like,” they continued, a very large grin on their face as they reached into the satchel again.

“My toe socks! I thought I’d never see these again!”

“How did you even know they were Santa’s?” Curtis asked, nose wrinkled as Santa grabbed the socks from Berline.

“They’re red and green toe socks with little Santas all over them, how could they not be his? I also found Jacqueline’s sword,” Berline added, pulling a silver double-edged sword out of the satchel. The hilt was inlaid with a few dull sapphires. “The sheath is in here too, somewhere.” They grinned as they pulled it out, placing the sword gently inside its scabbard. “Pretty productive night, I think.”

“Wow,” Santa said, not sure what else to say.

“Same,” Elle agreed.

“Now then! I would love to stay and chat but, ah, I have a replica snow globe to make and a sword to restore. Too bad I can’t be in two places at once,” they winked, hopping onto the balcony. “That was a joke, by the way Curtis. I can actually be in two places at once, that was the joke part.”

Curtis groaned as Berline disappeared in a bright light, Bernard and Jacqueline standing where the fusion just was, both in a bit of a bow, Jacqueline holding the sword.

“I get it now,” Santa said, understanding dawning. 

“Well, that was fun,” Jacqueline straightened up, glancing at her knuckles. “Bruises anyway. I hate bruised knuckles. How are yours?”

Bernard glanced at his knuckles. “A little bruised too. Could be worse though. We could all be fae stew right now.”

“And I’ve got my sword back!” Jacqueline said, grinning. “I better get moving, this is going to be a job let me tell you. I’ll be seeing you guys later. I think the two of you,” she continued, gesturing to Bernard and Elle, “have some chatting to do,” she finished with a wink. Before either of the two elves could say anything, Jacqueline disappeared in her usual shower of sparks and snowflakes.

“So, I get the fusion thing,” Santa began. “And I’m glad you got the snow globe back. What I’m not quite sure about is who exactly is Jacqueline?”

Jacqueline had had a good laugh when Elle told her later about Santa forgetting her for the third time. She was also relieved when Elle told her that they had said she was a friend of theirs, and Santa hadn’t pressed. 

Elle sipped a hot chocolate on her break, deep in thought about what Berline had said about her and B fusing. They had seemed so sure but since Berline had left, Elle had perhaps unintentionally been avoiding Bernard.

She was a little embarrassed of her jealousy before hand. It had been a day or two and really, she knew she should’ve gone to chat with B but for some odd reason, couldn’t make herself do it.

When you two do fuse–and I know you will–your fusion will be very different from me, Berline had said. And a lot more special. 

So that was great to know and all. Elle would have loved to prod Berline for more details. Facing them would be okay. Of course, Berline wasn’t there so it’s not like she could ask them. (In fact, Elle had no idea where Jacqueline was today, and her wintry friend was shit at communication sometimes--this being one of those times--so Berline was out of the question for now, and that was assuming B would have agreed to fuse with Jacquie because did Elle’s reasoning for needing Berline really count as an emergency?) Which meant she would have to talk to B. And facing B? Elle was still a little embarrassed to do that for...a bunch of reasons. Mainly the jealousy thing, and also specifically what Berline had said!

There was nothing left to do but to muster up the courage, get past the self-embarrassment, and talk to B as soon as she could. So, Elle made a split second decision. 

“Well, here goes,” she said out loud, topping off her drink and heading out to find him. She didn’t have to look too far because the moment she stepped out of the lounge, she smacked right into Bernard.

“Elle!”

“B! Hi,” Elle said, blushing. “I was just, uh, going to go look for you.”

“That’s crazy because I was doing the exact same thing. I think we need to talk. That is, can we talk? Are you okay to talk? Do you want to talk? Right now?”

“Yeah, sure. That’s what I was going to find you for, actually.”

It was silent for a bit, the two elves standing in the doorway, blushing and staring at eachother. Bernard cleared his throat. “Anyone in there right now?”

“No, it was just me.” With a nod, B gently put his hand on Elle’s back, leading her into the small lounge and closing the door behind them. 

“I wanted to--”

“So about--”

They both stopped, staring at each other. 

“Oh man, we’re a bit of a mess, aren’t we?” Bernard asked.

“When aren’t we?” Elle sighed.

“Most of the time, I like to think. You go first, Els.”

“I wanted to talk to you about what Berline said,” Elle said really fast, so that it sounded more like iwantedtotalktoyouaboutwhatberlinesaid. 

“Right. Me too,” B replied, with a little laugh. “Listen, I’m sorry they were so blunt with you. That’s just how Berline is. Fusions are like that sometimes. Not necessarily open or blunt, of course, but with certain traits more...prominent than others. Jacqueline is a very open sprite, and I may keep my feelings close but I do say them if necessary. So Jacqueline’s open-ness makes me feel a bit more open when we fuse and, well, Berline becomes a very...blunt person. I’m rambling. I said open way too much. Blunt, too.”

“No! It’s okay! I like it! I like when you ramble,” she said with a goofy smile. “And I absolutely love Berline, did I tell you that?”

“Technically yes,” B said, winking.

“Well I’m telling you now, I love Berline. I’m sorry I was jealous about them and you and Jacqueline. I...I don’t know if our fusion would have handled that as well as Berline did.”

“Berline’s been around. They know a thing or two. Listen Elle, I know...I know that Berline said a lot of stuff to you about, you know, us. And they were being truthful! I promise.” He closed his eyes briefly, breathing in. “I would like to fuse with you sometime soon but I don’t want you to feel pressured because of Jacqueline or Berline or even me.”

“B, I don’t feel any pressure. I’m the one who’s been pressuring you to fuse with me! And I’m sorry about that. I think seeing Berline in action kinda put a lot of things into perspective,” Elle said, placing her mug down. “They are their whole own person. Where did you and Jacquie even go?”

“We were there,” B replied, shrugging. “We didn’t go anywhere per se. We both physically became Berline. That’s how that works. It’s, ah, hard to explain,” he said, scratching the back of his head.

“Better to show me?” Elle asked, eyebrow raised, impish grin on her face.

Bernard laughed, grabbing both her hands in his. “Yes. Better to show you. Whenever you are ready.”

“Okay. Thanks, B,” Elle said, hugging him.

“You’re welcome,” B said, hugging her back tightly.

And then suddenly, they were both gone; neither had noticed it happen until they opened their eyes and saw nobody in front of them.

“I--oh,” Bernelle realized (their name the first thought on their mind), looking down at their hands. “Well that was unexpected. I feel like a too soon joke would work real well here.”

They blinked and took a step forward. And then another step. And then they lost their balance and stepped back, landing right on one of the couches.

“This is different. This is hard,” they thought out loud, frowning. “It’s okay. Just take it one step at a time.”

A deep breath. A determined look. They got up again, taking a few steps; Bernelle was finally getting the hang of their new form and realized something very, very important.

They loved themselves.

They loved everything about themselves; Jacqueline would probably say they were super chill, and that’s certainly how they felt. They felt happy. And lovely. And cozy, funnily enough. They were good, and it made sense to Bernelle; after all, they had worked hard for themselves. Everything was more or less fine. 

Except for the slowly growing unease in their gut. They were unsettled; something was...unsettling them.

“Are you okay?” B’s voice spoke, Bernelle looking concerned.

“I...I don’t know,” Elle’s voice replied, Bernelle looking frightened now. “This is...oh boy. I don’t think I can--”

They didn’t even have time to figure out what exactly it was before they disappeared, a very confused Bernard and slightly shocked Elle sitting where they had just been.

“Um. Wow,” Elle said. “That was, uh, something.”

“You okay Elle?” B asked, her shocked expression worrying him.

“I--uh, yes, I’m alright. I--you know what, that is definitely a thing we should reserve for emergencies, you were totally right B. Would you look at that time?” she said suddenly, looking at her bare wrist. “I gotta go...do, things. I’ll, uh, catch you around. Later!” And with that, Elle left, as fast as the two of them had fused.

That unsettling feeling came back; Bernard was sure something was wrong, and he was very afraid it may have been him.

Bernard stared at the large french doors before taking a deep breath and knocking repeatedly very loud. The door flung open, a disgruntled half-frozen Jacqueline serving him with an icy look.

“I know the house is big but you only need to knock once, B-Man.”

“Is fusing with me weird?” Bernard blurted out in one breath, startling the sprite.

“I--what?”

“Is fusing with me weird. Is it unsettling? Has Berline been weird this whole time and I never even noticed it because I was the cause for the weirdness?”

“Have you been drinking?”

“No! I...” Bernard sighed, frustrated. “Can we talk?”

“I think we need to talk. You need to chill out. Berline is a badass, and it’s never been weird being Berline with you and I’d like to know where this line of thought came from. Wanna come in or would you prefer to walk?” 

“I dunno, I’m a little scatterbrained.”

“I noticed.” She pushed the door open, moving to the side and gesturing him in. “Let’s pack some cocoa and go for a stroll then, B-Man, and you can tell me all about what’s got you in such a huff.”

“You were right,” Bernard said, walking in and following the sprite to the kitchen. “That’s what’s got me in such a huff.”

“Right about what?”

“How deep of a connection and special of a thing fusion is.”

“I’d be grinning more, but I sense that this isn’t really a good thing right now.”

“Yes and no,” Bernard said, leaning against one of the walls of the yellow kitchen as Jacqueline dug around the cupboards for a thermos and two mugs. The hot chocolate was fresh, and not instant (he could tell by the smell)--the best kind of hot chocolate. “I guess I’ve always seen it as a deep bond, but never really realized it until now.”

“You fused with Elle,” Jacqueline said, realization dawning. “Holy snowballs, everything makes sense now! For the most part, that is. I thought fusing would be helpful for the two of you, and y’know, good.” Running a hand through her hair (freezing it properly in the process), she headed towards the backyard doors. “Instead, you’re having a meltdown on my front porch.”

“We’re in your kitchen, actually.”

“And now we’re in my backyard. Let’s walk, B, and you tell me about what happened.”

So they walked through the backyard, toward the Northern River, and Bernard told her what had happened. He told her how they had talked, then found themselves fused. He told her how great it felt to be Bernelle; how confident and happy they were.

“Bernelle sounds like the chillest dude ever,” Jacqueline remarked, stopping as they approached the river bank.

“That’s what they thought, too. But then something weird happened.” He took a seat beside Jacqueline, taking the mug of hot chocolate she offered him with a mumbled thanks. “There was this feeling of unease. I didn’t know why, so I asked Elle if she was okay and then...”

“And then I guess you defused, because of that unsettling feeling. What happened after that? Did Elle explain?”

“No, she didn’t.”

“Did you ask?”

“Of course! I asked if she was okay and she said that fusion was something and definitely something for emergencies then she looked at her wrong wrist, said she was late for a “thing” and left very fast.”

“That’s so Elle” Jacqueline mussed. “Did you go after her?”

“No. I got the sense she needed space and then wondered what it was that made her do that and thought what if it was me?” He got up and started pacing, Jacqueline watching him go back and forth.

“That’s so Bernard.”

“All she said was that she didn't think she could,” Bernard said, ignoring Jacqueline’s comment (for the most part).

“Could what?”

“She didn’t say! And I didn’t ask,” Bernard said, face palming. “I tried, but she left and...”

“And your crippling self-doubt kicked in and now here you are.”

“Yes and no. It kicked in slowly over a day or two.”

“Uh oh.”

“I spent the first day trying to figure what it was that unsettled her because everything felt fine to me, it felt great! I didn’t understand what it was and that’s when I realized, holy tinsel, it’s me, I’m the problem.”

“Awwh, Bernard...”

“I couldn’t figure it out! And She’s been scarce since--”

“--as Elle do--”

“--so my mind has been running, Jacqueline. She was so enthusiastic about fusing and now she’s suddenly approaching it with typical Elf thought. Did I do something wrong? Was it bad for her? What if she saw something in me that she didn’t like, or that scared her?”

“Holy fuck Bernard,” Jacqueline swore, her face shocked.

“You swore! This is real bad.”

“I’m surprised the source let me get away with that. Listen, you need to take a breather, okay? Just breath in...and hold it...and out...okay, good. Calm that big brain of yours down, my elf,” she finished, getting up and patting his head, stopping him in his tracks.

“Don’t do that.”

“That’s better, that’s the B-Man I know!”

“That’s why I came over,” he said, a tad calmer, face to face with the sprite. “I thought, well, who could possibly answer these questions for me since Elle is being Elle? And my first thought was you could, because you’re the only other person I have ever fused with.”

“Then trust me when I say this, B. There is nothing wrong with you. Fusing with you is not weird, and there’s nothing bad or “dark” in you, you blizzard brain. I’ve known you all my life,” she said, squishing his face. “There is nothing wrong with you. Got that?”

Bernard nodded. “Can you let go of my face now?”

“Yeah, sure.” she let go, returning to her seat and topping off the mugs, passing the now seated Bernard a fresh cup. “In regards to Berline, by the way, if anything would make them feel unsettled I would assume it would be me and my very deep dark fears.”

Bernard snorted. “Jacqueline, I’ve watched you grow up. Your fears are justified and perfectly understandable, all things considered. Why would they make me unsettled?”

“Exactly,” Jacqueline said. “So why would you make Elle unsettled? After all the work the two of you did just to be together, and the way you guys are together, why would she be afraid of you?”

“I...okay, I see your point.”

Jacqueline smiled. “Good.”

“I guess I’d have to talk to her to really figure it out. But talking to you has been very reassuring. Thank you, Jacqueline.”

“It’s the least I could do, considering how many times I’ve had to go talk to you throughout my entire life.”

Bernard smiled. “Yeah, I guess so. The problem now is talking to Elle. I don’t want to hound her to try to talk when she doesn’t feel like talking, you know? I want to talk to her when she’s ready to talk about what exactly it was that upset her.”

Jacqueline nodded. “Noble of you, B-Man. Do you want me to talk to her?”

“Would you? It would be a lot easier if I had a sense of what she was thinking. She’s been keeping her thoughts close and I don’t want to disrespect her by intruding.”

“Absolutely, considering she just reached out to me and asked to talk. I better get going,” Jacqueline said, capping the thermos and getting up, stretching. “You all good now, or do you want to talk more? I haven’t made a solid plan with the kid yet.”

Bernard got up, thoughtful. “No, I think I’m okay now.”

“Good. If you aren’t though, you know where to find me, for the most part. Oh and B-Man, one more thing.”

“Yeah?”

“If your new take on fusion makes Berline weird, I will end you.”

Bernard laughed. “I don’t doubt that for a second. Don’t worry though, I promise I won’t make anything weird, Berline wise.”

“Good. Now let’s get back so you can get going and we can see what Elle’s thoughts are on this whole thing.”

“Sounds good,” B said, getting up and following Jacqueline back up into the forest, towards the backyard of Frost Manor.

Are you busy? Elle had blurted out suddenly, towards the consciousness that was her snowy friend. The immediate reply was shocking.

I’m finishing up with something that came up. Why do you ask?

We need to talk.

There was a brief silence before she got a reply. Am I in trouble?

Elle didn’t really know how to answer it. Maybe, she shot back, scowling at her work. Can you come down to see me?

...depends. It’s a little too close to late November for my liking.

Elle was briefly confused before she realized what Jacquie meant. He’s not around, I promise. 

I’ll be there just before dinner then. Tell me if anything changes?

Whether that meant if something came up for Elle, or if another particularly snowy (though Elle would call him more icy, really) persona made an appearance, Elle wasn’t sure. Either way though, she would warn her friend.

Yeah, sure snow buddy.

Cool, I’ll see you in a bit.

Jacqueline went silent, leaving Elle to her own distressed thoughts for the rest of the day. She was relieved when 5 o’clock rolled around and Jacqueline appeared in her flat, right on the softest of her couches.

“Hey Elle, how’s it going,” Jacqueline asked, drawing out the "o". 

“Horrible,” Elle blurted, plopping down beside her friend on the couch. 

“I had a feeling that would be the answer.” Jacqueline scooted closer, legs folded, and grabbed the nearest throw, bundling. “Well I’m cozy, let’s hear what’s got your mind in such a mess.” She grabbed another throw and tossed it on Elle.

“Bernard and I fused and it was...” she searched for the word.

“Different?”

“No.”

“Not what you expected?”

“Closer.”

“Overwhelming?” Jacqueline asked.

“I think a good word would be...enlightening?”

“Well that’s good!”

“But also terrifying.”

“That’s less good. Was it bad then?”

“No! It was great. Holy heck the confidence? And the love? It was all...great,” she said, smiling softly. “The thing is, it was a lot more than I expected it to be and. I didn’t realize when you said that the fusion knows everything each counterpart knows, all of the thoughts and feelings of each other, everything, that it was literally everything!” 

“Was that verbatim?”

“I have a really good memory, Jacqueline.”

“Dang.”

“That’s what made it so terrifying. At first, it was so cool, but then I realized that I knew everything he was thinking and feeling, which meant that he knew everything I was thinking and feeling!”

“I would’ve assumed with your telepathy and all that it wouldn’t have been that big of a deal. You’ve thrown me here, kid.”

“With telepathy, I can hear other people’s thoughts if they want me to. With fusion, I can hear the thoughts and feelings whether the other person I’m fusing with wants me to, or not. And on top of that, they can hear my thoughts too! And feelings! Whether I want them to...or not.”

“Ah,” Jacqueline said, understanding dawning. “I get it now. It’s out of you depth, the extent at which the connection with fusion goes.”

“What?”

“Sorry, bad word choice. Um...the fusion connection is deeper than your mental connections even are, is what I was trying to say.”

“Yes! It is! It’s like... I can’t control what’s coming out and that’s super worrying, Jacquie. What if...what if there’s something I’ve been holding back, and it slips out, and it’s a bad thing? I dunno Jacquie...you’re the fusion expert, what should I do? How do you deal with that part of fusion?”

“I’ll add that to the list under Queen of Subtlety and Shitty Winter Child and what did you call me the other day? a Frosty Bagel?”

Elle laughed. “Yup.”

Jacqueline rolled her eyes, smiling nonetheless. “What have you done about it so far? Let’s start there.”

“Well...not much, I guess. B asked me what was wrong but I honestly had no answer. I was just...terrified. Trying to make sense of what had just happened. So I...I left as quick as I possibly could and spent the past two days avoiding B and also overthinking like you wouldn’t believe.”

“Oh, I believe it.”

“I’m not in control when we fuse and I don’t like it! I don’t like not being in control of my own mind.”

“I know, kiddo. I know,” Jacquie said softly, squeezing her shoulder. Elle shot her a grateful smile. “The thing is, with fusion...it’s not like it’s a giant jaeger where you control one side and B controls the other side.”

“Is that not exactly what it is?”

“Not quite. It’s more like the drift than the actual jaeger itself. That is, if the drift became a person.”

Elle paused. “I think I see what you’re saying.”

“When you are part of a fusion, you don’t have control. Nor does your fusion partner. Your fusion has control. You become one person. You catch my drift?”

“Did you actually just pun?”

“Shit, I didn’t even notice. I’m turning into Blaise, good grief.” 

Elle laughed, leaning her head on Jacqueline’s shoulder. She sighed. “What do you think I should do, then?”

“I think you should just trust B-Man. Trust yourself, and most importantly, trust your fusion."

“Their name is Bernelle.”

“That sounds cozy, I love it.”

“Me too,” Elle replied, smiling.

“You need to just let Bernelle be.”

“You’ll need to elaborate, pal.”

Jacqueline looked thoughtful for a moment. “Trust Bernelle. Let Bernelle be Bernelle! They’re not Bernard, and they’re not Elle. They’re an experience that the both of you create. Make sure it’s a good one, Elle.” 

Jacqueline thought her chat with both Elle and Bernard had been very helpful, and that they would talk it out and realize that they both were fearing the same things. She knew that the moment they did that, it would clear up a lot for the both of them and Bernelle could once again appear.

Jacqueline, however, had forgotten that this was Elle and Bernard she was talking about.

That’s why, one or two days later, she found herself quite literally ghosting the two of them in the Workshop. She was carefully guarding her thoughts from Elle as she watched from a distance, invisible some of the time or coating a window in a lovely layer of frost the rest of the time. Elle had stopped avoiding Bernard, which was good. And it looked like he had stopped overthinking and was simply waiting.

That was the problem, Jacqueline found. They were both waiting. And Jacqueline could guess exactly why, seeing as how she liked to think these two elven dorks were her best friends and that by this logic, she knew them both fairly well. 

Bernard was waiting for Elle to be ready to talk; he didn’t want to push her. Elle was waiting for him to start, as she was feeling a little out of her depth and didn't want to push him.

Of course Jacqueline had thought of appearing and shoving them together and shouting “TALK” really loudly, but that would cause a scene that both elves would not appreciate. Elves, Jacqueline thought, sighing quietly. So what could she do? She wasn’t an expert in the fusion department, especially a case as special as Bernard and Elle’s. She wasn’t a love expert!

But she knew somebody who was. 

With a grin, Jacqueline poofed out of the Workshop silently and reappeared outside the Dome, where she took off up into the clouds.

It was chilly up in the Pantheon, as the Roman gods and goddesses referred to their cloudy home (despite contrary belief, they did not reside on Olympus as the Greek deities did and, well, they never got along well enough to occupy the same space, especially with how much their cultures differed). Jacqueline didn’t mind it; she never did, the few times she actually trekked up to the Pantheon.

Finding Cupid’s villa was always a bit of a hassle, especially when she wanted to avoid the other deities that may be roaming around the suspended streets (which was usually the case). Dealing with Cupid would be enough.

She ducked down beneath the clouds, finding the one shaped like a heart to confirm that she had gotten to the right villa. The moment she saw it, she zoomed through the clouds and stood on the front step, knocking as loud and hard as she could.

“Any louder,” a familiar grumpy voice said, Jacqueline nearly groaning as Cupid appeared in the doorway, a little surprised. “Jacqueline?”

“Hi Cupid,” she said, briefly waving before realizing that was silly and putting her hands behind her back. “Is, uh, Dite home? I need to talk to her about a thing.”

Cupid looked relived. “Yeah, of course, C’mon in, Miss Frost.”

“Thanks,” Jacqueline said, following him in. Immediately a group of cherubs swarmed him, all talking at once. “Where can I find her? You seem busy here, I don’t want to distract you or anything.”

“Second room to the left,” Cupid said, zooming off into the atrium, bickering with the cherubs.

“Thanks!” she shouted back, making her way to the room. “Knock-knock,” she said quietly.

“Jacqueline!” Dite said, sitting up quickly. 

“Were you on the floor?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“My wings were being stubborn,” she said, her feathers rumpled. “The chaise was not comfortable for us today.” She ruffled her wings and sat on the edge, making sure that they weren’t touching the back of the lounge at all. “You look distraught. What’s wrong? Is it a love problem?” she asked, grinning, her wings fluttering excitedly.

“It is! But not with me,” Jacqueline said, sitting beside her friend. “It’s with Bernard and Elle.”

“What? I thought that was going well!”

“It is! Well. For the most part. Long story or short story?”

“Hmm...” the blonde looked thoughtful for a moment. “Let’s hear a summary, then give me all the deets,” she said, scooting closer and grabbing Jacqueline’s hands.

“Elle and B fused after a lot of talking about it and some solid advice from Berline and it did not go as well as it could of.”

“Okay, wow, that’s definitely a problem. Though I don't quite understand why you're here. I can’t fuse myself; I’m not fae, I’m a celestial.”

“Right, but you and I have fused a few times.”

“I don’t think that qualifies me as an expert.”

“Maybe not, but you are a love expert. Here’s the jist of it,” Jacqueline said, launching into her tale. Dite listened intently as Jacqueline told her about Elle and Berline’s conversation, what Jacqueline had learnt from both elves had transpired when they formed Bernelle. She paid doubly close attention to the advice Jacqueline had given them, already beginning to see the problem the two were having.

“That was stellar advice,” Dite interrupted. 

“I know! That’s when I realized it was fast getting into love territory, to be honest. It seems straightforward to me--they just need to talk. But they just...aren’t! They’re not avoiding each other anymore which is great, but they also aren’t talking about the Bernelle thing, you know? I don’t want to force them to talk so I’m at a loss and that’s why I came here.”

“I don’t think we need to force them,” Dite said, deciding immediately that she was going to fix this right now. “I think they just need some outside perspective...maybe a nudge in the right direction. If someone else starts the discussion, then neither has to worry about making the first move. Hmm...” Dite rubbed her chin thoughtfully. “You’ve convinced me Jacqueline, I’m going to go talk to them.”

“I've done what now? You’re going to talk to them?”

Dite stood up, her wings already unfurled in anticipation. “Of course. This is driving you nutty, Jacqueline, and they can’t say no when a love goddess goes to them and suggests that they talk.”

“You’ll help them? You'd really do that for me?” Jacqueline asked, standing up.

“Yes! Of course!”

“Oh, thank you so much Dite, they’ve been driving me up the wall,” Jacqueline threw her arms around the goddess, a very big grin on her face.

Dite laughed, “You’re very welcome,” she said, hugging back tightly. There was a very bright lilac light suddenly and both girls disappeared, leaving one rather large winged fusion in their place.

“Alright, looks like we’re doing this together,” she said, grinning. With an experimental flap of her wings, she flew off, her sights set on the North Pole.

The Workshop doors burst open, a large gust of wind ruffling the robes of the very large figure in the doorway. A few elves went flying.

“Oh dear, I’m so sorry,” she said, catching the elves before they hit the ground. “I forget how fast I fly.”

“For the love of tinsel,” Curtis said, righting himself up. “Another one?”

“There’s another fusion floating around? Oh, is it Bernelle? I need to talk to them! It's important!”

“No! You’re the only fusion floating around. I've just seen way too many of you this month alone. It’s a good thing the ceiling is so high,” Curtis mumbled as an afterthought. "I don't think fusions would fit in the Elfirmiry."

“High ceilings really are lovely! It gives the impression of crazy amounts of space, makes it breathable, and makes it less claustrophobic."

“Okay...who exactly are you?”

The fusion stood up to her full height, her curly ponytail bobbing a bit. “My name is Diteline and it is very important that I talk to your two head elves right now immediately,” she said.

“Are they in trouble?” asked another elf.

“They will be if I don’t talk to them.”

“What about?”

“It’s a matter of love! And my sanity.”

“What’s the panic--oh my.”

“Elle! That’s one of you! Hi!”

“You’re huge!”

“Thank you!” she grinned. “You are so tiny and fragile compared to me. Holy snowballs I did not realize how HUGE I am! I could crush you,” she said, as if the realization that she could in fact destroy Elle very easily was an unexpected plot twist in your favourite book that shook you to your core, making you stop for ten minutes to stare blankly and think ‘what on earth just happened’.

“Are you okay?”

“I worry about small groups of people a lot. Humans, elves, tiny woodland creatures...” she ticked each off on her fingers as she listed them.

“O...kay,” Elle paused. “I’m sorry, who are you?”

“Diteline! And I need to talk to--”

“We know!” Curtis shouted. “You need to talk to Elle and Bernard right now immediately.”

“Yes! Thank you! What a nice boy,” she said, patting his head.

“Boy? I have glasses older than you!”

“No you don’t,” Diteline said, glaring at him. “I’m old as heck.” she cleared her throat and knelt down, sitting on her knees and staring at Elle closely. “Do you and Bernard have some time on your hands? The sooner I grab you two, the sooner we can get outside and the elves can stop panicking.”

“I’ll take care of that now,” Elle said, beginning to project calm feelings as best as she could--Diteline had thrown her off completely. 

“Back to work, elves,” Bernard said, entering the room and quickly noticing Diteline in the middle of the doorway. “There’s no emergency, Diteline just likes to...”

“Help young lovers in need,” she supplied. The elves around them giggled, rushing back to work after noticing Bernard’s glare. He marched over to the girls, craning his neck and glaring at Diteline. 

“What are you doing here?” he whisper yelled. “You know how the elves get around fusions.”

“Okay well this is a bit of an emergency,” Diteline said. "And judging by the giggling children, one that we definitely need to resolve right now!"

“This is Jacqueline and Dite’s fusion, Diteline,” Bernard began, answering Elle’s silent question. “I’m assuming she’s here because Jacqueline went to talk to Dite and Dite, of course, decided to pay us a visit,” he said, rubbing his temples. "And I guess sometime between there and here, they fused. And you know full well they are elves, Diteline. Not children."

“Well yes, once Jacqueline told Dite about the two of you still avoiding each other after that beautiful advice she gave, I couldn’t not come see you guys.” her face fell and she looked genuinely hurt. “You two are so sweet together and it kills me to know that you aren’t talking about something as big as fusion!”

“I was waiting on Bernard!” Elle said. “I didn’t want to just bring it up out of the blue since, y’know, that’s all I’ve been doing for a good portion of the year.”

“I was...I was waiting on you,” Bernard said, his annoyance with the fusion in front of them gone. “I didn’t want to talk if you weren’t ready.”

“This is going better than I expected,” Diteline said.

“What were you expecting?” Bernard asked dryly.

“A lot of silence. I thought I would have to hurtle through the Workshop, find the two of you, grab you both in my fists and take you somewhere nice for a teary confession that results in hugs and maybe kisses and a closer bond and my heart not breaking at the thought of the two of you not talking because of something as lovely as this!” She said, gesturing to herself. “I mean fusion, by the way. I’m lovely but I am referring to fusion.”

“I think I understand what Berline said about Diteline being too much at times,” Elle said.

“I’m a helpless romantic, what can I say,” Diteline replied. “I suppose the two of you are ready to talk to each other then?”

“Are you?” Bernard asked.

“I was about to ask you,” Elle replied.

“That’s a yes!” Diteline said, grabbing the two elves in her hands and bringing them up to her face. “Let’s go somewhere a little less busy?”

“Yeah, I think you’ve done enough damage here,” Bernard said.

“I’m just trying to help!”

“We know this,” Elle said, gently patting her wrist. “And we appreciate it. Maybe knock next time? Or give me a heads up?”

“I was in a rush,” Diteline said, blushing. “The thought did not occur to me, and yes, I know how ironic that is,” she smiled. “Now do you two want to stay in the Pole? Or is it okay if we go somewhere with more room? I don’t want to squish anyone accidentally that would be awful! Like crushing a snail,” she said, paling considerably and looking close to tears. “You are all so tiny.”

“Yes, it’s fine if we go somewhere else. Please don’t cry, you won’t squish any snails here, I promise. Or Elves,” Bernard said. 

"Okay, alright." She took a breather, composing herself once more. "Let's go make love happen! I know the perfect place to talk! To avoid squishing these children--Elves, sorry, but they look like kids! Especially to me! I'm huge!--we'll just pop on over there quickly. Hang on tight, I don't normally teleport, let alone with multiple people, so this may be a bit bumpy!"

And before either elf could protest, Diteline disappeared in a burst of lilac sparks.

Much to the relief of all three of them, they arrived at Diteline’s perfect place all in one piece. She knelt down once more, placing the elves down gently and folding her hands in her lap, smoothing over her lilac dress. Or robes; it was a weird cross between Dite’s stola and Jacqueline's dress and Diteline wasn’t sure what exactly to call it.

"This is a beautiful place," Elle said, looking around. The grass was dark and soft, fireflies floating up and down gently. Crickets sung in the dusk, a light breeze gently moving the branches of the flowered trees around them. "Where are we?"

"We're at the Springs, of course! The temperature around the entirety of the Springs keeps everything around us lush and soft and lovely. It's a very nice area. Dare I say it, even a little bit romantic. I picnic here all the time during the day!"

"Do you now?" Elle asked, a knowing smile on her face.

The fusion blushed. "You stop that, Ellington. Now then, take a seat, make yourselves comfortable. Let's talk."

"I--"

"Listen--"

Diteline giggled, the two elves once again cutting themselves off. Bernard smiled sheepishly; Elle sighed. "This again."

"We're a mess," Bernard said, smiling.

"But when aren't we?" Elle replied, smiling as well. "I know, most of the time we aren't."

"I like to think so. And you should too. I'm...sorry about what happened. I should've talked to you after I talked to Jacqueline but I didn't want to push you."

"I didn't want to push you, either," Elle said. "Otherwise I would have gone to talk to you after I talked to Jacqueline. I can't believe we both did that."

"I can't either," Diteline said, in a very Jacquie way. She was staring intently at her hands, threading some nearby flowers together. "Oh please, don't mind me; I'm trying to distract myself so I don't mess up your talk."

"That's very considerate," Bernard said.

"I try," she replied.

"Right," he said, sarcastically, thinking back to her sudden appearance at the workshop. Elle laughed. "Listen Elle, I'm sorry that that happened the way it did. And I'm sorry that it freaked you out."

"Don't apologize, B. I'm the one who's sorry. I was pushing it and when it happened, I freaked out. I just...I didn't expect the bond to be as deep as it was. I could see all of your thoughts and feelings and everything, and you mine...whether I wanted to or not. It was strange to not be in control of my own thoughts. Terrifying, even. that's why I left as suddenly as I did. It scared me and all I could think was what if you saw something bad in me? What if I was trying to hide something, and it slipped out? I panicked."

Bernard laughed. "Elle. I could never see anything bad in you. I love you! I chased you across a whole other timeline! We've been through a lot and if that didn't stop me, then something bad about you wouldn't deter me from being with you."

"Really?"

"We've been through this much and made it this far together so yeah, really. I can't believe we were thinking the same thing. I thought that maybe you had seen something bad in me!"

"Something bad? In you? Oh, please. You're probably one of the nicest people I know, B. I could never see something bad in you! I love you!"

There was a brief silence before the giggles started. Soon, both Elle and B were laughing very hard.

"I honestly cannot believe how perfect for each other the two of you are," Diteline said, smiling as the laughter subsided.

"That makes two of us," Bernard said.

"Three, even," Elle added.

"I would never disrespect your thoughts or feelings, Elle. I want you to know that, and remember that. Fusion or no."

Elle smiled. Reaching over, she hugged B. “Thank you,” she said. 

He pulled her close, squeezing her tightly. “You’re welcome, Elle.”

What happened next happened very fast. There was a bright light as the two elves disappeared. Diteline screamed and jumped up, wings fluttering excitedly. Finally the light died down and Bernelle sat on the ground, blinking slowly.

“You guys DID IT!” Diteline shouted, now hovering. She plopped the flower crown she had made on their head. It was a funny sight, considering Bernard’s beret was taking up residence on their head.

“We did? We did. I’m back!” Bernelle grinned. 

“And how are you feeling?”

“Not uneasy!”

“I’m so excited I’m gonna fall apart, I’m so happy you’re here!” Diteline squealed, hugging the fusion tightly.

“Thanks Diteline but could you put me down, I can’t breath.”

“Oh, I am so sorry! Look at that, even fused you are still so small. I’ll have to watch my strength around you! Oh, isn’t this delightful? I really am gonna fall apart!”

Bernelle lay back in the grass, eyes closed and content. “I’m here.” they said.

“Now you just gotta get use to being here,” Diteline said quietly, faintly glowing.

“You weren’t joking about falling apart!”

“I’m barely keeping it together, I’m just so happy for you two! You should take a vacation, by the way. Stay here at the Springs! Explore! Get use to existing! It would do wonders for your stress you know.”

Bernelle looked thoughtful. “Hmm. Part of me likes that idea, another part of me is low key concerned about that idea. Every time I leave the Workshop, something nutty always happens.”

“Think about it,” Diteline said. “I think it’ll be perfect. Just like you two,” she finished, booping their nose and winking before disappearing in a bright light. In her place now hovered Dite, a grin so wide on her face that Bernelle was seriously concerned about it splitting open. She held Jacqueline bridal style in her arms and was, in fact, screaming, Bernelle realized.

“You two did it! Look at you I am so excited Jacqueline, look!” Dite said throwing her up in the air and catching her.

“I’m looking! I see! Nice to meet you, Bernelle,” Jacqueline winked, now being hugged very tight by a still squealing Dite.

“Thanks for your help, Jacquie,” Bernelle said, smiling. “I’m not sure I’d be here if you hadn’t listened to both parts of me.

“It’s what I do! Best friend privileges and all,” she winked, still being hugged tightly by a very excited Dite.

“Is she gonna be okay?”

“Just give her a moment.”

Finally Dite calmed down, still smiling very big. “You two really are one of our best matches,” Dite said. “I’m glad you worked it out. I need to celebrate. We need to celebrate Jacqueline, do you wanna get ice cream?”

“When do I not?”

“What about you, Bernelle?”

“I think I’m gonna stick around here and do some thinking. About that whole vacation thing. I mean, it could be a real great thing for me, you’re both right.”

“Suit yourself,” Jacqueline shrugged. “I’ll eat enough ice cream for the two of us.”

Bernelle laughed, waving at the sprite and the goddess as they flew away, Dite dragging Jacqueline by the arm.

They listened to the crickets and lay in silence for a while, the far off rushing of water from the springs reaching their ears as they thought about what Diteline had said.

“A vacation...hmmm...”

It only took a little convincing on Elle’s part once the two got back to the Workshop a few hours later, the realization of how long they had been gone causing them to defuse and rush back. Santa gave them the all clear and, leaving Curtis in charge (after much deliberation, all things considered), the two set off for Crystal Springs, where Bernelle got to get their own celebratory ice cream.

It was a nice vacation, seeing the sights and just being together. Diteline was right; it really did do wonders for their stress levels. Everything was going fine until Christmas Eve, when Bernelle felt a shiver run down their back and a shift as if something...odd had just transpired.

That’s when Judy had appeared with the news and Bernelle nearly fell apart out of surprise.

Someone had used the Escape Clause; and it wasn’t Santa.

(BERNELLE LIVES! That’s the alternate title for Fusion AU part 3! Thanks again to the Ana bean for reading over the bernelle bits to make sure it all works well!!! I’m happy I got to unleash Dite on everyone, AND Jacqueline acting her age, AND DITELINE!!! Isn’t she lovely? Anyway please let me know what you thought I live for feedback! 

Up next: The Triumphant Return of Jackie Frost, Fusion AU Pt. IV >:D)

[franeridart]

This might be too much to ask but I broke my laptop and only have access to mobile and I'm dying to know what I'm actually missing but I can't check would you be able to describe it? Sorry I know this is annoying ignore it if it's too much trouble

It’s not annoying so don’t worry about it, but my posts should all be visible, now? At least my app doesn’t give me the option to request a review anymore… if you can’t see them still they’re all (aside from the one I posted earlier) backed up on my wordpress blog! You can see them from there without me needing to describe them~

Anon said:Franeri-san what dimensions do you usually use for your canvas? When I draw I end up making the canvas too small, so when i zoom in to make details it becomes pixelated. But I also don’t need my canvas too big because I won’t be able to proportion it;; it’s a visual thing… Ah I’m rambling sorry

I use a 6000pxx5000px with a 4px brush, usually, but I really rarely use it all, mostly it’s just like, corners of the whole thing. I tend to draw a lot of things on the same canvas before switching to a new one - that said, personally I can’t draw properly if I don’t zoom in above 100% (usually I work at 150% or 200%, more for details) so I’m really not the right person to ask this haha

Anon said:I saw that profanity is now being blocked more heavily by safe search so our good, good but foul mouthed Baku may be the reason your stuff is hidden. You’ve probably already heard this but I thought I’d let you know~

Rip so I heard orz though let’s not give our Baku all the fault here, I swear a lot by myself too haha I’m my own ruin, seems like - thank you for taking your time to share the info, anyway!!

Anon said:I’m really happy about your blog not being censored seriously. CAUSE YOU MAKE WONDERFUL DRAWINGS THAT FILL MY HEART AND I WAS STARTING TO PANICK. Keep up the good work~. 🖤

And I’m really happy you can properly see my blog, you sweet sweet cute and adorable anon!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:Hello! First, I love your art and your headcanons and stories! I am in love with bakushima half because of you, you beautiful tart. Second, about Bakugo’s laugh, holy crikey, of course he’s loud and explosive. The boy is a ball of stress and anger and when he laughs for real, it’s rare and takes effort. But like, can you just imagine when his explodo-kill mask cracks his face turns red because he doesn’t want to laugh. But THEN he barks out a laugh and everybody’s stunned and then he just SNORTS

YES!!!!!!! Oh my god yes that’s an hc I have he definitely, definitely snorts when he tries to hold back his laughter it’s so effin adorable I die every day a lot bless that kid

Anon said:Who tops of in your opinion in Bakushima?👀

Maybe either, maybe neither, depends on many things but mostly on how I don’t ever ask myself this question for any of my ships so I got no answer for it at all ever - instead we should ask ourselves the important questions, like who opens the water bottles between them (Kirishima when Bakugou’s palms get too sweaty and Bakugou’s forever resentful about it), who kicks when they sleep and who always ends up sleeping on the floor because of it (Bakugou’s the restless sleeper, poor Kirishima), who takes way too damn long in the bathroom goddamnit Kirishima get out of there already I swear to go——-

Anon said:your blog makes me really happy just keep doing you you’re like the best thing

Thank you so much holy smokes!!!!!!!!!! *O*

Anon said:wait wait wait wait! is Bakugou the one teaching Shark Kirishima sign language?? then does that mean Kirishima learned to sign ‘I love you’ from Bakugou!? (Q/)////(\Q)

They’re learning together!! They have an online dictionary and follow online courses, so Kirishima kind of looked it up for himself at first - he was signing it as love instead of really like thoug, which made Bakugou indecently flustered so in the end, yes, he was the one to teach him how to properly sign it :D

Anon said:Will you still be updating this blog?

Sure will! The wordpress one is just a backup thing!

Anon said:wait so question: in the mer au, does kiri know jsl from before? because the way he reacted to bakugou first attempting to sign at him looked like he recognized it but you said they both had to learn? does he react like that because he recognizes it as bakugou actively trying to communicate? (btw this au is So Good i love how kaminari is just “why are you like this” at kiri but his Gay Ass cant be swayed)

I’m glad you like it!!!!! And nope Kiri didn’t know jsl from before, but mers do have something similar to a sign language (there’s deaf and mute merpeople too, after all) so he recognized it as Bakugou going “I want to talk to you and this is the best way to” - also, he’d never seen a tablet before and Bakugou was showing him an explosion on it to make him understand and instead he went “what is this SORCERY” and got excited about a gif. Good, pure kid. I had no clue how to add that in the comic in a fast way tho so let’s leave it at him being happy they found a possible way to communicate haha

Anon said:Hi Fran!!! Hace you reas the theoriws aboyo kiri o kaminari Boeing traitors? Si you know where they came up? I’m lil bit lost even tho I’m up with the man lmao ALSO pls more maki-chan

So pretty much at some point in the middle of a meeting Present Mic mentioned how there probably was a traitor between them that kept on feeding the villains infos about UA, and the fandom of course got interested in that!! Who could it be? They started thinking it through and for some reason the theories that ended up being more popular are about it being either Kaminari, Kirishima or Hagakure - I don’t think any of these are true, but if you google search “kaminari traitor theory” or the same with the other two names you should easily find the posts explaining the theories and where they come from, if you’re interested!

Anon said:omg fran i haven’t watched/read bnha but still solely bc of your art i am IN LOVE with kirishima. he’s such a pure being I feel like crying every time i see him??? like i just watched the first opening of the anime and you bet i watched the 5 seconds kirishima gets over and over. like all the bnha kids seem great. i am somehow extremely motivated to read bnha now thanks to your art. BUT OH MY GOD KIRISHIMA I LOVE HIM SO MUCH WHAT EVEN

You picked the best fave you could ever pick, anon!!! Kirishima is the BESTEST boy, purest and brightest and energetic and actual sunshine and also super strong and resilient and kind of an ass now and again but in a good way he’s GREAT I’m IN LOVE with him good job your intuition is perfect

Anon said:THE MER AU WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER I LOVE SHARK KIRISHIMA AND THE TAGS ALL GAVE ME LIFE

GLAD YOU LIKED IT OMG!!!!!!!

Anon said:I love all your art, but especially all your self indulgent stuff bc first off HELLS YEAH DO THE STUFF THAT MAKES YOU HAPPY and another is it feels like self indulgent stuff for me but I’m not the one making the thing… So like… It’s Good™ BUT YEAH ANYWAYS I LOVE YOUR ART AND YOU AND YOUR ART MAKES ME HAPPY TBH I HOPE YOU’RE HAVING A LOVELY DAY

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH also this is super nice to know because sometimes being self-indulgent is all I can manage to do haha r i p but at least now I’ll know you, for one, will like it!!! That’s nice!!!!!!

Anon said:If you were ever bored and wanted to do more of your mershark au thing I wouldn’t be mad at all ! 😝 your art is so cute and easily recognizable and I really enjoy it! Stay beautiful lovely Fran!

!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I really, really think I will!!!!!!!! :D

Anon said:I bet if denki tried to do the “if i jump at ______ they will most certainly catch me” with bakugou, bakugou would just let him fall

Oh my god no Bakugou’s reflexes and instincts are too fast and automatic the actual reaction at seeing someone run and jump at him would be without thinking trying to explodo-kill them don’t jump at him Kaminariiiii

Anon said: What to you think of a school dance bnha concept thing???

I read a bakushima about it once and I DIED so actually A++++ great perfect amazing concept I love it

Anon said:I gotta know,what do you think of the “Dabi is Todoroki Shouto’s brother” theory? i personally feel like that 1’s the most likely theory to become a legit thing but im curious

I talked about this on my main just the other day!! And added something about it earlier through another ask! But generally I think it’s believable, and I wouldn’t mind it being true :D

Anon said:But, what are your feelings about this chapters? And Kirishima? God, I love him even more and want him to be happy, but Im also dying to know what happened to him in his past!!

I CRIED I love that boy so much I swear it’s getting ridiculous I’m so so proud of him and how far he’s come and I just want him to be happy??? I do want to know his past tho!!! I’ve just been asking for this for, like, eight months!! I hope next one will be the one I’ll finally learn about my child tbh ;–;

Anon said:Fran you should totally do bnha and haikyuu calendars

………………..boi that sounds like a lot of work, anon. Like, it’s an interesting idea, but also my lazy ass is telling me no way no what the heck go to sleep instead r i p

Anon said:Have you ever thought of an eraser mic fusion?

I’ve drawn it already!!

Anon said:fran i?? i love the way you draw smiles?? idk i was just going through your art and i realized that holy SHIT i really love the way you draw smiles. like each smile is different and has its own specialty. esp bakugo’s smile I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW HIS SMILE!! like usually it’s not really noticeable but then there’s that slight quirk of his mouth (see what i did there?) and it’s so perfect. idk dude i just REALLY LOVE THE WAY YOU DRAW SMILES

THIS IS SUCH A CUTE ASK I DON’T KNOW HOW TO ANSWER HELP ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you????? so much??????? I’m glad you like them cause honestly I love drawing people smiling and laughing, it makes my heart smile too~

Anon said:Theres a bnhaStuck blog in the works ;)

That’s? Nice! I guess!! I hope whoever’s working on it will have fun with it!!

Anon said:Fran this last BNHA chapter hurt so bad. And then I saw your mer-Kiri and it cheered me up!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m glad I could cheer you up cause honestly I felt that pain a whole damn lot too ;A; let’s hope Kiri won’t have to suffer much more in this arc #sob

Anon said:im crying fran, my hard bby kiri in the latest chap,,, my baby boi, i know that i wanted to know more abt him but,, keep my baby safe pls oh goodness gracious… (and as usual ur bootiful art keeps me alive)

I mean nearly all the character arcs we got are damn sad so it was obvious Kiri’s was going to be too, but still ;A; don’t make him suffer too bad Hori I beg u ;A;

Anon said:*takes deep breath* I FUCKING LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR MAKING QUALITY ART OF MY FAVOURITE SHIPS YOU ARE SUCH AN AMAZING PERSON AND YOUR ART IS VERY PRETTY AND I JUST WANTED TO THANK YOU FOR EXISTING IN GENERAL BYe

THANK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO MUCH OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anon said:!!!!!!FRAN!!!!!! YOUR MER!KIRI AU!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D I’m glad you enjoy it!!!!!! 

Anon said:I love your work 😍. You are the only one who makes comics About my favourite ships. I check your web everyday If you post something new. My fav ships are I.waoi, bok.uroo and bak.ushima. Love your work 🙂

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh thank you!!!! holy smokes!!!!!

Anon said:Do you have an OC for Boku no Hero Academy?

The closest things to bnha ocs I have are the fusions, right now, but there’s a couple of asks in my inbox about a bkkr kid… soon……..

Anon said:Quick question, I want to read haikyuu, I’ve watched the anime already and I was wondering how close the anime follows the manga, like how bnha is basically identical, is it the same? Or is there a bit of difference *^*

I’m SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME FOREVER TO ANSWER - I bet you already found your answer elsewhere, but anyway the anime is pretty much exactly the same as the manga!!

Anon said:Back on the topic of hq!!! I find it funny how people ask about bok.uroo so much as if you dont like them anymore when they’re literally still your header, like if you didn’t care for them they’d think you’d change it to bakushima or something

I’ve literally thought about changing my header so often but then I look at it and I’m like….. my kids………… I can’t do this………………. not yet…………………. same for my icon tbh haha I love them too much rip

Anon said:Okay but what if Kirishima makes a really stupid pun and Bakugou just turns away with a curse and he’s just covering his mouth and quietly giggling into his hand because even he can’t believe he found that funny, and that is SHAMEFUL. And Sero in the distance is just looking at him, all disappointed. Quietly judging the fact that Kirishima and Bakugou are practically meant for one another.

You wanna know the best thing the absolute best thing? My very first bnha comic was something eerily similar to the first part of this ask! Only Bakugou was the one to accidentally make a pun - I’d link it but honestly my style was ridiculous back then so not happening, just know that I’m 100% sure that post is the reason why I keep on drawing bnha comics about puns, my very first post set the path for all the others to come hah a curse I don’t actually mind

Anon said:are you planning on starting another series? like the bokuroteru tattoo shop au you did (it was real dandy and rad) it was what made me find your blog, so i was wondering if you have any future plans for anything similar. i really like your blog lots, i hope you have a nice day!

Right now I don’t actually have any idea orderly enought to make a proper series out of it, rip - maybe in the future, tho! That one comic was fun to make, after all!! And thank you!!!!!!!!

Anon said:IM HARDCORE IN LOVE WITH TODOSHIMA THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR RUINING MY LIFE❤️❤️

I’M GLAD YOU LIKED HIM OH M Y GODS!!!!

[oceans11]

writing this post just cause i love rambling about things i like for no reason but here are movies i think are good entry points if you are interested in trying akira kurosawa movies!

intro: i basically typed up this list cause akira kurosawa’s one of the creators responsible for making me really interested in film, and most of all convinced me of the merits of b&w/”old” movies. if you’ve never, ever heard of him, he’s most well known for seven samurai, but a lot of his other movies are highly influential from spaghetti westerns to star wars (haha alliteration) and are almost all EXTREMELY visually pleasing. so i want other people to enjoy them! albeit with a good first impression

i’ve written little blurbs for some of these, but if you want to know more about the plots of these movies, i generally recommend looking at the criterion summaries instead of google summaries or trailers, just cause i think they’re better written and less spoilery. i don’t think historical context is too critical to understanding these movies beyond, like, decent knowledge of wwii and knowing what a ronin is, but it definitely doesn’t hurt. thanks for reading!

yojimbo (1961)

watch if you: like a neat premise and a simply fun time! or if you enjoy westerns

what it’s about: a ronin winds up in a town contested by two rival gangs, and proceeds to manipulate them both for $$$

this was my first kurosawa movie and it’s still my favorite so ofc i’m gonna recommend this!! i’ve looked around and this seems to be the most popular intro movie, so, heeey. this movie was directly inspired by westerns, which i’m no expert on but hence why fans of the genre might like it! i’m breaking my rule already but here i specifically recommend watching the trailer, which is a little spoilery but not nearly to a ruinous degree. personally i thought it & the concepts were THE HYPEST SHIT when i first saw it and it totally convinced me to watch the movie.

the intricacies of the plot i got kinda confused about the first time (though i get confused about plots pretty easily, and you can still get a general idea) but in my humble opinion the merits of this movie lie not so much in intrigue, but in the visuals, premise, and watching toshiro mifune fuck around for almost 2 hours. his character, sanjuro (who might still be my fav movie character ever), and the fact that i was SO surprised by how great this movie looked, are the reasons why i fell in love with this movie and why it’s still one of my favorites ever. it brought me all the way to writing this post 7 months and more than a dozen movies later, if that’s any testimony

the bad sleep well (1960)

watch if you: like hamlet, and/or enjoy noir movies, crime dramas, etc

what it’s about: psuedo-hamlet climbs the corporate ladder to exact revenge on his father’s killers

this movie is one of three shakespeare adaptations kurosawa has done; the other two are throne of blood & ran, for macbeth & king lear respectively. i’ve heard all three adaptations are pretty loose (i can only speak for this movie, though) but the general consensus is that they are good, & i think they’re worth looking into if you like the source material. imo this movie bears just a faint resemblance to hamlet (like, i wouldn’t have noticed the parallels if i hadn’t been looking) but it enhances the experience

i recommend this one most because, in my opinion, it’s the most palatable. a problem i have with kurosawa movies sometimes is the slow pacing (a problem ran and tob share, imo) but this movie is very engaging, thanks to the noir/crime elements. plus, great visuals, so there’s lots 2 love even if you’re not a fan of the source material

drunken angel (1948)

watch if you: like a neat premise and a simply depressing time. also if you want something closer to 90 minutes than 2 hours

what it’s about: a yakuza is diagnosed with tuberculosis by an alcoholic doctor, and the two slowly befriend(?) each other

if you can’t tell i’m arranging this list in order of increasing sadness. kurosawa is more often than not a downer and that shows very much in this movie. it’s an early kurosawa, so the visuals aren’t as great as they can get, but they’re up there, and the story’s well done. i got invested as hell lmao

when i first watched drunken angel i only saw it as a character-focused drama, and it’s a great one, but i found out while watching the special features that the movie was produced during the post-wwii occupation, and made it past the american censors while criticizing said occupation, which i think is interesting as hell and worth looking into if you pick this one!

honorable mentions:

the hidden fortress: one of my least favorite kurosawas actually, which i can elaborate on another day, but if you REALLY like star wars, this is the film it was most directly based off of (especially character-wise), and it’s really neat to see the connections and/or theorize about the new trilogy! (listen... darth vader/kylo ren/hyoe tadokoro parallels)

stray dog: i love this movie irrespective of its quality (although it is pretty good) cause it’s credited (at least by wikipedia) with being a precursor to the buddy cop movie, so if you, like me, are a sucker for those, check it out! there’s a sweet dynamic albeit not so much banter as there is, like, ruminations on morality and the humanity of criminals

kagemusha: suffers somewhat from the slow/repetitive pacing i mentioned and i wouldn’t really recommend it till you’ve grown to like kurosawa movies, but hey, i liked it, and if you have a netflix account and don’t wanna bother renting/checking out from the library/whatever it’s the only kurosawa movie on there! 

harakiri: NOT ACTUALLY A KUROSAWA MOVIE, THIS IS BY MASAKI KOBAYASHI, I’M CHEATING, SORRY, but i needed to talk about how good this movie was somewhere goddd. if you’re interested in classic japanese cinema beyond kurosawa i cannot recommend this movie enough. takes its sweet-ass time but very engaging, ft. some nice visuals, and the moral ends up hitting like a train while being pretty damn timeless. just a great great movie that i have to recommend 

[onghwangs]

now i'm curious! who's your personal top 11 vs what you want the top 11 to be?

Wow okay…my personal top 11 is comprised of ppl I foundenjoyable to watch and have fun cheering for, I’m a sucker for dumb fools and hiddenstorylines so yeah. 

But, man if they put this group together I would screambecause noooomg it would mostly be a comedy troupe than an idol group. theymight as well be called 10gagmen1straightman (10G1S)

(edited for guys in the top 59, in no particular order) 

yoon jisung- I likedhim ever since ep 1. I think that most, if not all of the trainees were chatteringaway during the auditions but I find that he seems to not really censor hismouth. I think a lot of the trainees are very and tense image conscious (theyshould be due to mnet) and Jisung (and the other MMO guys) were more relaxed. He’s funny but not offensive funny…Iremember like when Daehwi was explaining his avengers team, Jisung was likeyeah, go ahead and eat up all the popular members, Dahewi and JKKSJDKSJKJKSTHAT MAN. He seems like a genuinely fun and nice person to be a round, judgingby how he seems close to both his label-mates and his 10/10 group-mates….anyways📢📢📢I LVOETHIS MAN AND THAT ANTI WHO DM’D HIM TO GET HIM IN TROUBLE CAN SRSLY FCUK OFF!!!📢📢📢

kim taemin -  he was so cute in his intro vid but he was sonervous his voice was shaking so much lmao poor thing…. But im fucking….ifthere’s really a meme in this show, it’s taemin…everything they show of him, he’smaking a damn fool of himself. Him screaming in the hiddenbox thing, himfailing to do headstands, him dancing to nayana…yeah I lof the fool!! What reallymade me like him was him acting so surprised and happy when someone called hisname wayyyy back during the first nayana perf. Like….he seemed so amazed to have fans lmao what a gem. He’salso quite photogenic too.

Ong seongwu – THEBEST ALL ROUNDER IMO???????????? He’s a good singer ( hE WAS ONE OF THE 6TRAINEES THAT SANG PICK ME! WITHOUT HIM THERE WOULD BE NO NAYA NA), a great dancer, already has charisma and is hotwhile being complete dork? Amazing. I really adore him and his three moles and I’msuper worried for when the 1-pick voting comes because he doesn’t seem to havea lot of individual fans (someone prove me wrong pls)

Park Jihoon –yeah that wink got me shook. But yeah, srsly speaking, his wink did catch myeye but I thought he was going to be wayyyyyy to cute-ish for my tastes. I wassurprised by the way he carried himself (cute, but not too much, he seems to bevery calm too).  I think he’s skilled butcan improve much more (esp his singing) so I look forward to his improvement!! @mnetI’m still waiting for his angry clip L I LOVE HIM SO MUCH I WOULD BUY ALL THELIPBALM HE NEEDS, JUST TELL ME WHAT BRAND U WANT BOY, I”LL GET U A SUPPLY SOBIG THEY’LL OFFER U AN ENDORSEMENT DEAL

Kim Yehyeon – He seemslike a really sweet guy and this story is what basically made me stan him (andgave him that 39+ rank rise) my boy is a fuckin saint he went to the emergencyroom because he was too overworked and he had to perform Be Mine will injured..T_T He did not almost die for no screentime and continuous repeats and zoom-insof ppl gulping….anyways he’s also dumb, you should support 

Lee Junwoo – an actualbaby!!!!!!!! He caught my eye in episode 0 but I totally forgot who he wasuntil I saw his famous TATATA dance. What I liked about him was that he didn’t completelygive up after messing up and he kept on going hard @ the dance (he even made itto a C despite those mistakes!) he’s an awesome dancer and has good expressions!I really look forward to seeing his Shape of You stage (I think) I heard it wassupposed to be real good. I’m also screaming because he looks like a baby is ashuge as an elephant IRL 184CM HOOOLLLLLY

kim yongguk – I gotto know him because of that pann post and I support and adore him so much butnot as much as kim sihyun does!!!!! He’s a pretty nice vocalist and pretty goodsinger..but I think because baekho stole the entire stage, it’s hard to judgehis stage presence,  I really do lookforward to seeing his stage and seeing him be more of a savage!

Ahn hyungseop – Ilove him, he’s such a textbook slyth, he even expressed disappointment ingetting a lower rank than before. I can see why ppl don’t like him (similar todaehwi) but I really do adore him and his quirky ways. While I think he’s agood performer, I do think he would be more a B-rank rather than A. I’m stillnot quite convinced of his singing just yet….

Joo Haknyeon – tbh,I feel like he was born to be an idol with a face like that, I think it has amore idol-ish feel than Jihoon’s. I find that he’s a really decent dancer too!I do wish he had a better audition song…like why’d u choose that song and b-boyto it omf. He seems to be a total sweetheart as well! Hanywayz…..i wanna seemore of his friendship with ong, they seem to be good friends as well Y_Y @mnetGIV EHIM MORE SCREENTIME.

Yoo Seonho – it’sa surprised to me how much I like him?? He’s so cute and harmless lmao. I can totallysee why he was casted, along with guanlin, and sent out despite being only trainees for 6 months. they will super popular in thefuture (if cube doesn’t fuck up). I’m not really expecting much from him, beinga 6 month trainee, but he did surprisingly ok in sorry sorry compared to hisexperience, I’m looking forward to seeing his next stage. He also seems to be agreat guy, judging by his fanaccs and activities.

Yeo Hwanung – he’sa great dancer and stable vocalist, why is he being slepton?????????????????????? He seems super sweet and patient with Justin too likegoing through the notes together…

Notable mentions: everyone else, I fucking love and support all of them!!!!!! I just find these 11 really interesting at the moment.

—

 hennyways……here’s my top final 11 AKA B.O.I. …sorta. I thinkit’ll probably change after the next eps as people come to prove themselvesmore!! But this group, I’ll be pretty comfortable with them debuting and confident that they will be able to handle different concepts, all can carry their weight, etc. (in noparticular order)

Ong Sungwoo – HAHAHAHA iLL SERIOUSLY QUIT THIS GROUP IF ONGDOESN’T GET IN LIKE SRSLY HE’S GOT IT ALL I’m SO FUKCING SCARED OF HIS FUTURE THAT’SHOW MUCH I LOVE HIM???

Kang Daniel – He’s another well rounder. So he seems like areal sweet person but he ( along with Ong ) don’t really seem to take shit fromppl and I like that they speak there mind, though I want him to be careful ofhis actions as well LMAO. He’s also a fuckn miracle worker, my friend went fromdisliking him in ep2 to being a full stan by ep5 so I think he seems to be aperson that would keep fans engaged for a long time.

 Park Jihoon – Yeah, I’m kinda being biased, but he’d doreal well as a stan attractor! He dancing is good and I feel like he’ll improveon his singing soon….okay enough…

Kim Jaehwan – holyyy shit his voice is sooo good. All theguys in sorry sorry team 2 were good, but the dude carried the vocals for histeam, lbr. Im sincerely hoping he pulls up into the final 11, the vocals would get a huge upgrade holy shit son.

 Im Youngmin – alpacaaaaa aaaaaa!! He’s growing on me somuch and seems to be a very kind person, teaching the be mine moves foreveryone. I love that group so much, they seem genuinely close to each other !!  His rapping is good and he seems to be quitecharismatic on stage

Kim Taedong – His jump from F to A holyyyy shit whattaman!!!  His moves are sharp and he’s astable singer, I’m really liking what I’m seeing from him so far. I think he’s real idol material and he seems likea complete dork too, I loff!!!!!!

Yoon Heeseok, lmaoooo he’s also another living meme. He’san excellent singer, I really want him to work on his dancing a bit though but heseems to be improving quite nicely, from F-B. his shoulders are also killer.

Lee Daehwi – Another all-rounder. He doesn’t deserve thehate he gets, I honestly hope he makes it, he has the skills and personality tomake it into the idol world. He’s a sweet boy.

-(wildcards) x 3

 lmao okay I cheated, it’s because I haven’t fully decidedyet….i still wanna see more perfs Lbut here are a list of guys I would love to see in the final line up as well.

Wildcards:

from my personal top 11: jisung, yongguk, hyungseob, hwanung,anyone that shows they’ve got what it takes/improves immensely

vocals: sewoon, hoeseung, woodam, gwanghyun(???), donghyun,dongsu, kiwon, keonhee, seonglee. youjin

rap: woo jinyoung, namhyung, big woojin

dance: hyunmin, eunki, kenta, samuel, kim donghan

nu’est, hotshot members: I’m reallllllllly conflicted inthis. In a perfect world, they don’t make it in the top 11 but their companiesgive them comebacks they need and the make it big and win awards and it’s the perfectcomeback story lmao…but I’ll still be happy with any of them in the line up aswell

wow i’m sorry i wrote too long jdksajd

[eldritchsurveys]

951.

5k Survey XLIX

2501. what image, scent, memory, etc. would you take with you into the dark/light, the land of dead, heaven, infinity.....? >> I’m not sure how to answer this. 2502. Who is the most annoying musical artist EVER? >> --- 2503. If you HAD to go to one of the following concerts, which would it be: Snow Vanilla Ice NKOTB Milli Vanilli BSB NSYNC >> No, thank you. 2504. Do you believe in manifest destiny? >> Just that very question insults me, lmao. Sorry, no, I’m not an arrogant imperialist who labours under the delusion that every piece of land I happen to set foot on belongs to me. 2505. Have you ever fallen for an email forwarding hoax (send this to 13 people and old navy will send you a $200.00(100 pound) gift card)? Do you ever think 'well, maybe...' and actually forward those damn things? >> I have not.

2506. Let's say there are 2 schools. one for boys and one for girls. They are both supposed to offer the same facilities so that the girls and boys get equal education. Would you take this to mean that the same courses should be offered to both girls and boys or that the same amount of money should be spent on each school? >> Why are the schools segregated in the first place? That doesn’t make any sense to me and it never did. Imagine that in the boys school fifteen boys sign up for calculus. In the girls school only five girls sign up for calculus. Should the girls calculus class be disolved and replaced with an easir one? >> Of course not. Why deprive those five girls of the class they want to take, just because there’s only five of them? Also, there’s... there’s a lot to unpack about this entire scenario and the implicit sexism involved but I think I’d rather just throw the whole damn suitcase away. Next. 2507. Would it bother you if you found out that the fruits, vegetables, and meat that you eat is genetically altered (in lots of cases it is!)? >> Of course much of the food I eat has been genetically altered in some way, either by centuries of selective breeding or perhaps by some newfangled modern practice. I don’t see why this should automatically disturb me. What does disturb me is corporations like Monsanto blatantly using this power for evil. 2508. What does this world need? >> --- 2509. Is there anything you do just because you want to even though it has no redeeming social value? >> It’d be fucked up for me to measure everything I do by its perceived “social value”. What does that even mean, anyway?  2510. If you drink what kind of drunk are you? >> I don’t drink enough to get drunk anymore, so I can’t really say. I’m probably just a sleepy, lazy drunk at this point. 2511, Do you ever 'convieniently' forget something you don't want to remember? >> I don’t think my brain works that way. 2512. If you have any cousins are you close? >> --- 2513. Are you in love with yourself (your beautiful self)? >> I am not in love with myself. That seems like an odd relationship for me to have with myself. 2514. What was the first movie you got on dvd? >> --- 2515. If you're sexy and you know it clap your hands. Did you clap? >> I did not clap, because like... why. 2516. have you ever called a: psychic hotline? suicide crisis line? sex line? dating line? >> I’ve called none of these. 2517. have you ever placed a personal ad anywhere? >> Maybe on Craigslist once. 2518. Do guys look good in make up? >> I don’t care about how people look in make-up, I care about whether they enjoy wearing makeup and whether it makes them feel good. If that’s true, then I love it. 2519. What are 5 things you don't care about? >> I can’t think of anything right now. Probably because the fact that I don’t care about something means I don’t think about it... 2520. wHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO UNTIL YOU DIE? >> Why is this in caps? I’m assuming it’s a capslock error, but like... why wasn’t it fixed, lol. 2521. What 'issue' do you think your opinion is so right about that you end up trying to sway others to your point of view? >> I don’t do that. 2522. What age do you hope to live until? >> I don’t have a specific age in mind. I just want to live to the point where I feel like death isn’t an intrusion on my living -- where it makes sense to die. 2523. Do you like to tie others down during sex? Have you ever been tied down? >> I’ve never done either, but I’m sure it’d be fun with the right person, if having sex with an outworld person was ever a thing I was going to do again. 2524. Do you own any "toys"? Do you ever use them? >> No. 2525. Have you ever been spanked in that sexy way? Have you ever spanked anyone else? >> I was spanked at at least one play party, but I didn’t particularly enjoy it. It’s not really my thing, although I’m sure spanking someone else would be way more fun. Haven’t done it yet, though. 2526. Do these questions make you uncomfortable? Do you like that feeling? Does it turn you on? >> It never occurred to me to feel uncomfortable, no. 2527. You know those ___ for dummies books (COMPTERS FOR DUMMIES, SURFING FOR DUMMIES, GOLDF FOR DUMMIES, WICCA FOR DUMMIES)? Which one do you need to reaad? >> I do know those books. I don’t know which one I’d read, though. 2528. What do your socks look like? >> I’m not wearing socks. 2529. Which of these really famous music artists started their career as a mime: Alice Cooper David Bowie Bruce Springsteen Moby Jewel Frank Zappa >> I’m sure I’d find out if I googled it, but I don’t care to. 2530. Does love float away if you let go? >> What does this even mean... 2531. Do you think that most people in today's society are: kind? calm? humble? peaceful? helpful? happy? spiritual? creative? friendly? independant? intelligent? having fun? comming up with new ideas? able to think for themselves? able to really connect with others? If you answered no to any of the above, why do you think that is? >> Why am I generalising about “most people”? That seems like a silly thing to do. 2532. Do you believe that every action has a sexual motive (think Freud)? >> No. Pretty sure that theory of his was debunked anyway, because it just doesn’t make any real sense. 2533. Speaking of Freud, did you know he was on drugs (think cocaine)? >> I was vaguely aware. I mean, a lot of people have taken and do take drugs, big deal. 2534. Do you trust psychology as a valid science? >> I acknowledge that it’s a science. However, I also harbour a lot of skepticism about some of the stuff that is either explicitly or implicitly stated in many psychological theories, and I am particularly skeptical about how psychological theories are applied to actual interactions with and diagnoses of clients. 2535. ID: In Freudian theory, the division of the psyche that is totally unconscious and serves as the source of instinctual impulses and demands for immediate satisfaction of primitive needs(sex, food, agressive behavior, drugs, alcohol, yelling, anger, fighting). SUPEREGO: In Freudian theory, the division of the unconscious that is formed through the internalization of moral standards of parents and society, and that censors and restrains the ego. So, which one do you express more, your ID or your SUPEREGO? >> The superego. I mean, you really don’t get very far by just letting your id run wild.  2536. Do you think that people who are alone and depressed are depressed because they are alone or alone because they are depressed? >> I think it’s a feedback loop.  2537. Can you complete any of the following lyrics: I stop and I stare too much, afraid that I care too much... You're a new and better man, he helps youtounderstand,He does everything he can, he's.... Took the needles from my arms and put them to the sky... Top Gun shut down your Firm like Tom Cruise.... Don't you take it so hard now, And please don't take it so bad.... I’ll still be thinking of you, and the times we had. That’s the only one in this list I know. 2538. How about these? From around the way, born in '73, Harcore B-boy named... And this feeling shivers down your spine, Love comes in colors I can't deny.... Before he hung up the phone he took a deep breath, stopped, and replied.... When I want you in my arms, when I want you and all your charms, whenever I want you all I have to do is... Silly games that you were playing, empty words we both were saying... 2539. Have you ever been to see a ballet? >> I haven’t, but I’d like to. 2540. What is the differance between Satan and Pan? >> They’re from completely different mythologies, for one, despite the fact that they often get conflated. 2541. What should a poem be or do if it is a sucessful poem? >> There’s no such thing as a “successful” poem, to me. That’s an odd way to think of poetry. A poem is a poem if it’s written down as such, and that’s it. 2542. When you interpret a poem can each line mean anything you want it to? >> Well, sure, isn’t that what happens when you read something? You interpret it through your own lens. That’s unavoidable. 2543. Are you an orgasm addict? >> Er, no. 2544. Are you a sugar junkie? >> No. 2545. WHAT are you DOING? WHY aren't you marching in line with the rest of them? >> --- 2546. Do you only hear what you want to? >> I mean, I just hear whatever my brain interprets sound waves as. 2547. Are you anal-retentive? >> Er, no? 2548. In and Out Over and Under Around and ??? >> ?????? 2549. What was the last thing you returned to the store? >> I haven’t returned anything to the store in years. 2550. Why ask why? >> Because?

[survivorislandofthedolls]

INDIVIDUAL IMMUNITY RESULTS #1

We had a flag making challenge and I’m very happy to say almost all of you submitted! Dom and Claire warned us ahead of time they could not submit and are excused. Carver did not and will receive a strike!

Let’s meet our Judges!

Steffen

i am a beautiful pony

Eric

Hi I'm Eric the founder of Flops R Us and host of Devils Lair with its first season starting 23rd. I'm a fair judge so don't expect roasts from me. Idk who's still in so someone be eliminated soon bye

Regan

So I'm Regan I'm 19 I just hosted the mess that is india. AND I played black forest believe it or not. And u might hate me after this if you don't already

Chris

steffen is a beautiful pony

FLAG 1 (Dani)

Steffen: Y’all know the way to my heart huh, not only is this what they would do on the show, but the name…A FRIGGING +++++++

Eric:  I love the layout and I like it but creativity low because it looks basic but I love basic so 10 on appeal

Regan: this is literally amazing but no

Chris: I've literally seen this done multiple times on multiple flags created so I took off for effort and creativity, but I do love how cute it is so I had to give you full points for appeal.

FLAG 2 (Matthias)

I'm so sad. someone ruined the tribe flag I worked on and it's now full of fresh blood. I spent all day sewing my clothes together and hunting squid for their ink FOR NOTHING. I need to get to the bottom of who did this.... My first thought was that maybe this was revenge from Madeline for that notorious blindside. but it couldn't be, she was far away from the island when I finished this. I looked and investigated for HOURS and there's no conclusion. It's time to think outside of the box...The castaways had a feeling that we aren't the only one on this island. sometimes we feel someone following us, we get shivers and the doll's eyes follow us EVERYWHERE. But it can't be the dolls? the dolls aren't the real evil on this island? Impossible....I'm holding one right now and they are so cute! reminds me of childhood 

Steffen: Where are all the names? It looks more like a mobile

Regan: I like it but I don't find it appealing sorry I don't like blood so 8 on that 

Chris: I really love the story that goes along with the gif, not a huge fan of the flag... really at all though. It'd have been cute if the animation wasn't so " flashy"  in the sense that it hurts the eyes or if it was.. just not animated.

FLAG 3 (Michael)

Steffen: Dope design, like it flows, but next time use the actual logo

Regan: I'm sorry that takes 5 minutes??? how frickin cool are you??? just a nice border? try harder thanks 

Chris: I took off points from effort because nothing original idea-wise seems to have gone into this.. and it even seemed that you didn't even take the logo from the game itself and just put the name of this one over one you found somewhere else. As for appeal, I love the circles and stuff since they remind me of label makers and I love those.. but the rest (like the font and placement of the tribe name) bug me.

FLAG 4 (Duncan)

(for legal reasons, Human resources has advised us not to post this flag!)

Steffen: no, is that carson?

Eric: This is weird and thanks for making me confused sexually but I give creativity where it's due and I didn't expect this for sure lmao. Btw is this carson wtf. Ps with all my judging 5 is my neutral score so basically it's my idgaf score. I'm not mean and giving ppl 1s

Regan: what the hell

Chris: I'm assuming that in creating this flag you just went through your folder of screencaps for porn and just found one where you can see a man's ass. Then you put the logo over it and censored out his penis. I'm not sure it took that much effort since you probably had the images on hand. As for appeal, it looks nothing like a flag. It lacks pretty much.. everything that would make it even remotely close. I think it did require some original thought to actually submit a picture of someone's "bussy"  though so I gave you full points in creativity.

FLAG 5 (Bryan)

Steffen: yay didney

Regan: I love it but like that takes literally 5 seconds sorry. Like all you did was put peoples names in cool fonts and slap pinnochio on it??? wow so cool? 

Chris: The only reason that you lost points for me, honestly, is that I feel the filter over the dollhouse makes it hard to see and Pinocchio stands out just a little but too much. I loved everything else and I'm not sure what the "puppets"  and " real boys"  is reference to except maybe Pinocchio... but it's a wonderful addition.

FLAG 6 (DJ)

Steffen: I want Mcdonads

Regan: what the fuck do bratz and the worst fast food restaurant have in common? right they're both on a boring ass flag and they both suck 

Chris: Once again, I'm giving points for things that probably shouldn't be getting a score this high. I think that the effort of making a gif in general should be high, but the content that is actually on the flag looks like you started and then decided "I'M NOT GONNA TRY ANYMORE" ... so I took some points off. As for appeal, I don't get the jokes about Burger King or the Bratz doll so I didn't give as many points as I may have if I were in on the joke.

FLAG 7 (Angelica)

Eric: Really creepy but it seems you did a lot of editing and the concept is very creative, and that appeals to me

Regan: literally my favorite its so adorable

Chris: The addition of the dolls hanging from the trees really hit the theme and finding just the right creepy dolls for your flag was probably a good image search you wish you could forget (assuming dolls frighten you). The placement of the names and the font used kind of three me off as far as the appeal went because they look like after thoughts. Also, the tribe name on the top border thing  does not fit at all.

POINTS RESULTS ARE HERE

AND ANGELICA HAS WON IMMUNITY! For everyone else, your votes are due tomorrow April 14th at 10:30 PM EST!