#sorry as i mentioned i literally talked (read: complained) about this to two different people in the last week
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What do you think about middle aged sunflower ????
Okay I'm going to pretend I'm normal and didn't just have a conversation about it yesterday within which I had to restrict myself because of Discord's stupid character limit
Anyway. Gonna talk about fanfics briefly, because fics tend to get more complex with characterization.
A while ago, I got really into Marvel, and for two months I did nearly nothing except read spideypool fanfic all day and night. If you know anything about these two (that isn't from the MCU) (I hate the MCU, I hate it so so much, this is not who Spidey fundamentally is, he is supposed to be a friendly neighborhood loner loser and you Cannot just give him an Iron Man suit and a mentorship with Stark and intergalactic missions at 16 or however old he is in those movies when the essence of the character is that he is an average struggling teenager who just happens to get superpowers and fucks up a lot at the beginning of his journey and mostly works alone and quit the fucking Avengers himself) (wow I started rambling sorry. Ignore that), you'll know that they are both around... 25-30ish, currently. Something like that. The only other fandom that I read as many fanfics of was Ace Attorney, where depending on the timeline, they can be from 23 to like, 35 with a kid. So I'd say me being so invested in a ship with 16 year-olds is... kind of an anomaly.
I don't usually like the coming-of-age, teenage love stuff, and I honestly have never found a single sunflower schoolfic I liked (except Spiral of course but even then they're in college) because all of them tend to... infantilize both Sunny and Basil at great length. And also tear down anything that makes them interesting characters. I think a lot of OMORI artists (that includes writers) are very afraid of doing anything substantial with teenagers, despite, you know, the actual plot of the game, and as a result, a lot of the time most fics where the characters aren't aged up tend to be... incredibly boring. Of course there are some that are good — exceptional even — but in the end all I can think of is the huge gap in... quality? that sounds wrong to say about a creative thing... interesting-ness, let's say (a very personal and subjective concept), when I stopped reading Marvel and went back to OMORI. I stopped reading fanfics altogether because I just couldn't find one I liked as much as the average Marvel fic that I hadn't already read.
Maybe it's a result of the writers themselves being young? I know OMORI's fanbase is generally a lot younger than Marvel's, so that could affect it. I mentioned schoolfics because there's a lot of them and because they were mentioned in my rant yesterday, but it's not really about the fact that they're schoolfics, it's about the fact that more often than not, the setting is the plot, and since it's just your average highschooler writing their favorite blorbos into their own environment and projecting (which is very cool btw, 99% of my own writing is projecting), the plot is... basically nonexistant. It's boring. It's boring and the characterization is usually dull. But even outside of schoolfics, I think I stopped trying to read fics that start with Sunny getting out of the hospital after the True Ending for the same reason : it's often plain and plotless and boring. And, fuck, my favorite books and mangas and such are slice of life, I'm all for mundane plots! But there's a difference between a mundane plot/realism and just no plot at all.
(This is not, like, an attack of OMORI writers who make schoolfics or fics that start with the above mentioned premise, btw, I want to make that very clear. It's very much a personal preference. I think it's boring because all of the fics I read in Marvel had a very unique plot/premise is my point. And also because the characters were a lot more mature and complex. Different strokes for different folks)
I think that's what I'm kind of sad about. OMORI characters tend to be complex and morally grey in their own way, and people tend to forget about that because they're teenagers and obviously no one can do no wrong before the ripe age of 18. Children are all innocent and therefore cannot be more morally complex than cinnamon roll soft boys/girls (looking pointedly at Sunny, Aubrey and Basil. But mostly Basil). Also, I think people tend to straight-up forget that 16 year-olds aren't, like, 10? Of course they're not going to be as mature as grown adults, especially Sunny OMORI, Dissociative Amnesia World Champion, but like... When I was 16 reading OMORI fanfics, half the time I was like "a 16 year-old would not fucking say that". But also generally more mature characters are inevitably more interesting to explore to me because I prefer more mature themes — I'm simply extremely upset at the fact that people don't explore the complexity that's already there when they're 16, including the very mature themes that are already there.
TL;DR: I love middle aged sunflower, I love middle aged ships in general ! In fact, I will tend to prefer sunflower when it's aged up.
(... I probably should've led with that.)
#rant#cough. that was one hell of a rant#sorry as i mentioned i literally talked (read: complained) about this to two different people in the last week#i'm kind of insane about sunflower. very deranged. i have many thoughts about them.#don't ask me about characterization because I will make a whole fucking essay#(((ask me about characterization please i will make a whole fucking essay)))#ask#xxl1ghtxx#i am so sorry I spent half an hour writing an answer that shouldve just been 'I like them! :D' with a doodle#unfortunately I am not normal about sunflower and their age.#I NEED TO STOP OR I'M GOING TO RAMBLE MORE IN THE TAGS. JESUS#omori
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Soft gentle life between dark signers and Grand Prix headcannons of the garage apartment boys who absolutely do not know how to live a soft, normal life. (Inspired by that one filler episode of jack trying to a get a job)
- Yusei does most of the cooking because while the other two can scrape together a meal they either put together the bare minimum for nutrition (chicken and rice with a veggie smoothie style) or go absolutely ham with sweets and expensive products and he cannot live with that. Plus he enjoys cooking because once you figure out the basics you can get creative and trial and error and It’s kind of like working on his bike.
- They really lean into the bachelor pad lifestyle thing. The most expensive things in the apartment are their duel runners and their video game console for the tv. They have a shabby beat up couch but sit on the floor half the time anyways. Jack insists on having one spot he likes on the couch be “his” spot and Crow and sometimes Yusei will run, like literally haul ass, to the couch to sit in that spot and piss him off.
- They have had physical altercations over this spot.
- They don’t bother with bed frames and just toss mattresses on the floor of their one bedroom. They tend to have their fair share of nightmares, especially Yusei dreaming about his duels with Kalin, but when one of them wakes up in a cold sweat one of the other two will undoubtedly be up out of bed making them their favorite tea (akiza put them onto tea it’s doing wonders but only jack will admit to liking it). Sometimes yusei’s nightmares will get so bad that jack and crow wil say fuck it, move their mattresses to his, and use the warmth of their bodies and the weight of their arms around his to get him to feel secure enough that he’ll finally rest, physically knowing that his friends are ok and alive and literally on him. When they wake up no one mentions that they’ve been three way spooning the whole night basically.
- Jack is such a coffee snob and will treat the boys to the best beans and a nice espresso machine which crow thinks is the hugest waste of money ever but uses more than he does (because he is perpetually tired from work)
- It takes a second for Jack and Crow to get used to Leo, Luna, and Akiza just coming over to talk to Yusei or hang out. Leo immediately closes the gap by gushing to Jack, well, about himself, and Jack’s soon regaling him with tales of his best duels and Crow’s competing by telling him about his run ins with sector security (only the PG stuff) and teaching him to build things. Jack eventually forms a connection with Luna and Akiza because he gets what it’s like to be more reserved but still be dramatic and have a rich life and eventually they’re talking about dueling or books (for some reason I headcannon jack as the biggest reader of the three but also that Luna loves to read) or things to do in new domino.
- They also have chill table top duels with Leo, Luna, and Akiza and Jack and Crow are surprised when Luna and Akiza give them a run for their money. (Sorry Leo but Luna’s the dueling prodigy).
- The three boys will have their own three way duel game nights. These inevitably end in them physically tussling around the living room.
- Yusei and Crow have to make a chore chart bc Jack never wants to do household chores (living with Goodwin’s funding made him mad spoiled) Jack will do the chores when put up to it but by god will he complain and trash talk then the whole time.
- They don’t talk about Kalin a lot. Or about those years when he was locked up and the three were living separately. It’s still obviously in the air, noticeable when Crow and Yusei go visit different groups of people in the Satellite and Jack stays with Martha basically the whole time. The days they go to visit though, they finish off with a meal at Martha’s so filling their stomachs hurt and a ride back to new domino city that’s slower than they usually ride, like they’re savoring the existence of the bridge and prolonging their time on it for as long as possible.
#yugioh 5ds#yusei fudo#jack atlas is my comfort asshole#jack+yusei rambling once more#jack atlas#crow hogan#enforcer boys idk what to call them#yugioh#leo and luna#akiza izinski#headcannons#jack + yusei + crow <3
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Texting HC for the boys
Wind - Uses discord way more than text. Commonly mutes chats. He gets a million discord messages from different groups and he can't be bothered to listen to every time someone complains about the mountain of dishes he left in the sink. If you really want to reach Wind you have to jump on discord or go to his room.
Twilight - Doesn’t like to send more than one message in a row because someone called him desperate one (1) time in high school and he never recovered. So instead he’ll send you a whole paragraph and agonize if he forgot to mention something. Everyone’s told him its fine to send literally a million texts in a row but Twi can’t get over it.
Warriors - Will 🙌 ironically 😎 text 📲 like ❤️ this 👏. But only when he wants to be annoying. Otherwise he’s fine and he can use emojis like hieroglyphics if he wants and he’s able to make himself very clear with just an eggplant emoji and a raised brow emoji.
Wild - Commonly texts the wrong chat and confuses the hell out of people. Accidentally forgets his phone in the other room and doesn’t see people’s messages until its several hours too late btu still texts them back like “oops sorry just saw this man” as if they didn’t know. Uses emojis liberally and goes on tangents and makes everyone forget what they were talking about. The people love hearing from him, but its hard to stay on topic when Wild is in the group chat.
Champion - Full words, no abbreviations. Will straight up send you an “acknowledged” instead of an “ok” to let you know he read your message. Never uses emojis. Ever. The one time Warriors did convince Champ to send a thumbs up emoji to Sky instead of “affirmative”, Sky almost broke down the dormitory door because he thought Champion had gotten kidnapped and was sending a coded cry for help.
Legend - Spams the fuck out of everyones phone when he’s pissed, which is a lot of the time. Doens’t give a shit what group text he’s in he’ll fucking send you an essay one sentance at a time cursing Sky out for eating the last of his goddamn breadpudding.
Hyrule - Never responds on time. He’s always busy and in a rush so when he reads a text and it doesn’t say something like “help i got shanked and now my liver is flopping around on the ground like a beached fish” then he’ll promptly forget what he just read. At the end of the day he might flip through his messages to check what he missed but normally he relies on Legend to fill him in on anything important.
Sky - Forgets which group chats hold which roommates so he’s the guy who will start a new chat every time he has a question. Has basically every permutation of group chats possible and yet will still find a way to make more. And he gives them names like “get milk” and “hairdryer?” so you never know whos in the group chat at a glance. It’s impossible to find anything. Plus, he sends texts half-asleep that mean nothing when he gets woken up too early.
Four - His texts are inconsistent as hell. Sometimes its emoji hell, sometimes it’s MLA essay format. But two things are always consistent: you can always detect the sarcasm and he’ll turn on his read receipts just to let you know he left you on read.
Time - Texts in full sentences but overall is a normal texter. But he types with his pointer finger with two hands so his real crime is being old.
Dark - When he got put away texting was in its infancy so he texts like “G8 C u L8r” and “ur 2 much”. The first time he texts Time after he gets out Time feels his soul vaporized by the blast from the past. Thankfully it only takes Dark one text to Shadow before the boy is physically showing up outside Dark's door to bring him into this century.
Shadow - Spams dumbass videos and memes like his life depends on it. His job is a lot of waiting around so he’s got time to kill and you Will receive messages from him at 39 mph (memes per hour).
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Let’s talk about backlash and response in the Red, White & Royal Blue literary and cinematic universe.
The book:
Casey changed two things in the book when there was backlash, and honestly the fact that they were so quick to respond to these and not anything else is kinda super upsetting.
The first was the Harry Potter books that Alex (and Henry too?) read, and like obviously JKR is a fucking bad person, but… The books exist! Millions of people read the books! Mentioning them by name isn’t gonna make you a bad person, having fictional people read these books doesn’t make them bad, it means they read books that existed. Trust me, I’m in the hating JKR trenches with everyone, she’s an antisemitic TERF, but of all the things in the world to be mad at, fictional characters reading a book isn’t it. Like, I have Harry Potter books on my shelf, am I supposed to burn them all and go back through my old instagram from middle school to delete all references to Hogwarts houses? No. Because multiple things can be true at once: JKR is a terrible person, and Harry Potter books at one point were highly read and enjoyed. Like, mentioning or not mentioning a book from over 20 years ago won’t impact JKR, if you want to stand up against her, stand up against her new video game and TV show— things that will directly put money in her pocket, stand up against Cursed Child if you want, donate to valued organizations that promote the things she hates. Anyway, It was changed to the Percy Jackson series instead, which is fine, but I think changing the books was an interesting choice. Like, obviously Casey doesn’t agree with the transphobic and disgusting views of JKR, neither do the characters. (CMQ probably does agree with some of the antisemitism, but that’s another story). Regardless of my own views on this change, people were upset by it and it was changed. Casey listened and made the fix. Editing to add: I’m totally cool with the change! Like I complete understand why it was done and if I were Casey I would have done the same thing. I, very badly, wanted to show how you can separate the author from the art, but I think there are some things that maybe can be judged by the author. I hope anyone I offended by misspeaking sees this and understands that I didn’t mean to reduce your pain. You are valid and correct in wanting the book removed from the book, especially when it was an easy fix. My point was solely that Casey listened and changed things, I shouldn’t have said anything else that undermined that or caused hurt, even indirectly. Again, sorry if my misspeaking hurt you, it was never my intention
The second time the book was edited, was after some people got weird about a reference to a UN ambassador: (copied from a Slate article because this isn’t in my copy) in which a supporting character who is the president of the United States complains, “Well, my UN ambassador fucked up his one job and said something idiotic about Israel, and now I have to call Netanyahu and personally apologize.”.
This is literally so nothing it’s insane. People claimed it justified the Israel/Palestine conflict and said that America would always back Israel, which like, I’m not going to explain the conflict because it’s bigger, older, and more complex than Tumblr, but no. No. No. No. Just no. This has nothing to do with that, Israel and America are Allies, and it’s no different than someone saying something about Canada. Also, nobody likes Netanyahu except Netanyahu, so this line is actually more of a funny satirical line about how the president has to go talk to this guy who’s an ally but super annoying. This is not an invite to send me anything about the I/P conflict, because I promise I know way more on this topic than you think and I’m not getting into it. Regardless, people said stuff, Casey listened, it was changed.
The movie:
After backlash about the actors ages, Casey posted a very attitude filled and almost-guilt trippy post saying that it’s rude and wrong to say that people who are 28 or 30 are old, because that’s calling Casey old, that’s saying that people who are older can’t discover their sexualities.
None of that was what people were saying, but they wanted to save themself, so they responded.
Backlash about the actors sexualities- Casey responded.
Preemptive response to people talking about Nick’s hair color- There was a response from multiple people
Response to people talking about Taylor being Mexican-American. This one was more of a “Hey! We did it!” Positive response by multiple people from the production, mainly the director who said that they purposely sought out the correct actor for Alex so people wouldn’t say anything bad and would be happy about it.
I’m sure there’s more, but I haven’t been in the know for a longggggg time.
All that to say, there’s been a ton of backlash about how Nora’s ethnicity was erased and how antisemitic their casting decision was, and the only thing they’ve done is block and remain silent. Not to forget that the production and CMQ know about the antisemitism within the RWRB fandom and they don’t give a shit.
Funny how things can be addressed when it’s literally about anything besides their Jew-erasure.
#rwrb movie#red white and royal blue#red white royal blue movie#rwrb cast#rwrb#red white and royal blue movie#casey mcquiston#red white royal blue cast#nora holleran#rachel hilson#jewish#red white royal blue#cmq#rwrb film#prince henry of wales#alex claremont diaz#nora rwrb#rwrb henry
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Veilguard Breakdown Part 3
I'm consistently going over post limits so this is going to continue to take awhile. This is reactions to the FINALE and major ending choices (and the beginning of my criticism of the criticism of the game) Spoilers under the cut.
Oh my god what a long and drawn out fraught miserable amazing devastating final Fight against Ol Ghil
Ok more like five final quests. holy shit holy shit
The choice between Dav and Harding?? Fucking impossible. Miserable. i will never be able to handle it. Nor Varric. Oh my god. My heart hurts. I’m sick to my stomach. Miserable. But that’s good writing baby. You got me to care.
I literally keep ping ponging back and forth between which could be worse. They’re both so bad.
For me, Davrin dies a hero’s death. Assan was a protector until the end. I couldn’t do that to Harding, or Taash. Harding deserves an apology from Solas (spoiler: boo she doesn’t get it edit: ok damn she does get a weak ass one!! i just didn't get that banter?? Man I wish I got more banter). I chose Davrin because the griffons are set up to have their new beginning. They are his legacy, but Harding hasn’t had the chance to share the Titan’s memories. It still fucking hurt so bad tho. Assan…
I also chose Bellara to disable the wards. Which I ultimately really liked Belara’s final thing with the blight better than her actual main quest so i’m super happy to have chosen her. Her having the archive and using it when it suits them but also being like you aren’t MY GOD and fucking Elgers up. Amazing heroic moment. And she survived! Hooray for being a hero!
did have to restart a section because I accidentally killed Emmerich which was um. The Worst thing to see knowing his problems with mortality and giving up lychdom to revive Manfred? That got my jaw cracked to the floor.
Amazing awesome set pieces and animation for the finale. Final fight was not hard at all. I got a bit OP’ed tbh lmao
FUCK YEA TO THE HAPPY SOLAVELLAN ENDING THO! Or as happy as they can be
Solas and Inquisitor in the fade together sigh. Forming it to their quiet idolized life of study and magic. That juicy thick, raspy Thank you, Rook got me. Him crying was SO well animated and voiced. Sad wet egg.
The hilarious non serious version is that she’s like oh my fucking god I am sick and tired of Chantry bullshit. I don’t want to be in charge anymore. Please the south is so fucked and everyone is gonna be so mad at me regardless and I cannot fucking deal with it again. Please take me away.
THE MYTHOLOGY of her actually having an end like Andraste??? Wild, genius, so big brained. Another instance of people being very Literal tho and applying real world relationship standards. Or I guess being mad it doesn’t fit their canon? Idk it’s very odd to me to get such a different read on Solas. Like he fucking hates the material world, idk how his story could end anywhere but in the Fade drenched in magic? I also am gonna choose to believe they aren’t completely cut off from the rest of the Fade. One, because the prison was opened when Solas released the Evanuris. Two, together they should be able to release the binds of the prison. And three, the Fade is Dreams, where mages can be fully conscious in the Fade. So she’d be able to visit people in their dreams, and like fully communicate with Dorian
There’s SO MUCH dialogue i missed so I’m gonna have to read like a script. LIKE SORRY I KNOW IT GOT MENTIONED ELSEWHERE BUT LUCANIS HAS A SNAKE? i know for like venom and poison and stuff but oh my god. I feel like I got so little banter but that’s my fault for fast traveling and sprinting everywhere. Punished for being too good at game.
NOW WE GONNA TALK ABOUT THE HARD CHOICES:
God take the game away from idiots complaining about the hard choices. Do you want the game to be gritty, dark, with hard choices? Or do you want it to be a point system where if you do enough good, you can save everyone? YOU CAN save most everyone! if you didn’t do that you can lose like the whole team!
Like saying it affected you deeply and gave you actual GRIEF over these characters is a GOOD NARRATIVE! they made you care THAT MUCH! and it DOES have to be between those characters because that’s what makes it such a hard choice! If they let you sacrifice your least fav companion and walk away unscathed emotionally THAT WOULD BE CHEAP.
How many times do they have to say we’re fighting the gods?? We won’t come out unscathed, Solas saying we have to make the hard choices, make sacrifices. i’m coming from Origins and DA2 where someone has to die or compromise their morals A LOT to kill the archdemon and no matter what you do Kirkwall ends in tragedy.
It's also REALLY EASY to talk shit on Solas and be like "well I wouldn't let anyone die, I wouldn't sacrifice people to win." WHICH HE TELLS YOU, if you do it right you won't have to make that call, they'll do it anyways (and subtext of you'll still feel responsible for it. It will still feel like YOUR FAULT. That's his whole deal, his whole problem, is feeling responsible for his own AS WELL AS other people's decisions).
I’m trying not to be soft on the game but seeing people’s frustrations and complaints is a little between… I get it, i think that would have been nice, i think it could have been cool, i wonder what that game could have been…
But also i know enough about writing and game/general production that i totally see why they made the choices they did. I see the narrative arcs, and see the streamlining needed for the scale/scope/pace of the narrative and I can imagine where it would have gone if they DID go the other way people will ask... and still see why they chose to do it the way they did.
Also none of the choices have mattered across many of the games. Love DA2 but in game none of your choices really matter. The qunari still destroy the city and the Mages rebel. How it gets there matters to us playing it but in the grand narrative it doesn’t.
Same with the Warden. If one of the main options is for the Warden to DIE then they can’t have any Concrete story where they show up. They have to write to include ALL possible realities.
OVERALL VERY HAPPY! Very much enjoyed the game! I thought it was the most fun gameplay of all of them and I love my Solavellan ending and getting a new series of Ships to set sail on.
The next posts are going to be more into the production and game designing stuff I touched on a little bit here in the end.
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REU Weeks 7 & 8
Hello! Once again I am behind on my “weekly” posts but here I am lol. I have been pretty busy these last two weeks as the end of this program is coming to a close soon. The project I am working on with two other students took an unexpected turn last minute so we are all kind of cramming trying to figure out where to go next and how to get there. We have figured it out for the most part; it has just been pretty stressful. This past week, week 8, I was seriously so unmotivated. I got some work done but not nearly as much as I needed to and now I am cramming and freaking out once again especially with our final project so close now.
I am so excited to go home and see my family and pets but mostly my sister. She is my best friend and I live with her at college so it has been pretty rough not being able to see her for a while. I am also excited to go home because I am not really friends with anyone in our whole REU group of students. I get along with all of them but not really friends with them. The only two I would consider friends are the other two students I am doing work with this summer on the same project but the one person is very independent and just hangs out with themselves and the other person is commuting for the REU and lives about an hour away so we don’t hang out. But that is okay. I know I did not come here to make the best of friends but it kind of makes me want to go home that much more since there isn't anything like a bond holding me back from missing it here. I have a mini vacation planned for about five hours from here this weekend though that I am very excited about :)
Plus another thing I did not mention: it makes me want to go home even more that there is literally nothing I have to be on this campus for. My mentor has moved to a different state that is 10+ hours away from here so if we meet it is online, meetings with the other students I work with could easily be online, and our last two meetings as a group have been moved online including the final presentation. It feels like this REU is already over honestly but I know it isn't. It is just so hard right now to get the motivation when everything changes at the last minute. We were supposed to have a final poster session in person but that changed so suddenly and has made me lose even more motivation.
I don't know right now I am trying to stay positive but it is pretty hard knowing I pretty much could go home and it would be fine but I just feel bad doing that. BUT that was a rant sorry about that if anyone is actually reading this. It has just been tough here. The area is beautiful but if you take one step off of campus in any direction it is just filled with homeless people and overpriced food. Sorry I for real and going to stop complaining now I just needed to get that off my chest.
Also I have another thing to get off my chest actually. I want to go home so bad right now also because I have figured out that three of the girls here (one being my roommate) are talking about me behind my back so that's fun. BUT NOW I AM DONE, this week I am going to grind and really try to get back on track with everything. Typing this out has MOTIVATED ME TO FINISH STRONG!!! LETS FUCKING GO!
#geology#geologist#introduction to geology#biology#geography#environment#rocks#engineering#environmental science#minerals#reu
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When people state in their leaving xplrclub post that there's 'not enough fan interaction' but you know for a fact that both boys have been responding to members feed posts regularly and have been leaping into the chat semi-regularly. Just because it's not happening when you are online does not mean it's not happening.
I do not understand what these people want, do they want them to come on every single day and spend hours chatting and responding? Do they not realise they have work/editing to do and lives to live? This fandom is so unbelievably clingy, my word. Some fans are literally dogs with separation anxiety I swear to god.
If you're leaving xplrclub that's fine, goodbye and have a good life but at least be accurate in your leaving post
idk if this is the same anon five times asking me the same thing, just slightly different. or five different ppl needing my opinion on a fan leaving xplrclub bc snc don't interact with us anymore sksksk
imma be honest with yall, idc. i'm not personally on xplrclub to interact with snc, that's just an added bonus. not to mention there is 2000+ ppl on there, it would take them HOURS to notice all of us. i don't expect that from them. if you feel like you weren't getting your money's worth, then leaving is the best option.
that being said, snc seem to try to interact at least weekly from what i can tell; either in chat or in the member's feed. and i think that's fine enough for me, bc again, i don't use xplrclub to talk to snc (or really anyone for that matter lol).
but outside of xplrclub….. a lot of fans are complaining about snc not interacting with us more. and my thing is, what else are they supposed to be doing? bc according to the twitter heads, they aren't doing enough.
lemme try to lay out what i've read and seen them say:
snc repost fans constantly on their xplr insta account, and also on their personal, but that's not enough. bc a, they only notice fans for merch which just feels like they only care about fans that spend money and b, they only repost hot, skinny, pretty fans.
for YEARS fans wanted snc to repost fans more in merch, and now that they're doing that, it's not good bc it's only fans that spend money that get noticed?????? okay. and the pretty fans only get reposted comment… i've explained how i feel about that. it's horseshit, and you're just insecure. sorry.
also let's be clear here, it isn't "oh snc don't notice fans enough" it's really just colby. bc none of yall bitch about sam. everything colby does is the worst and he's the worst, but sam's allowed to do whatever he wants as long as it's not involving kat or katelyn or a combo of the two, right?
yall wanted colby to like edits/artwork from fans more. he starts liking edits of him and malia. that's not good enough. but when he was noticing fans' work, it wasn't the "real" fans or the ones that "deserve" to be noticed that got likes from him.
you want snc to talk to yall on twitter yet… every day you guys flip flop between being nice to them or shitting on them. it just depends on whether or not they seem online or if you direly need them to wish you happy birthday, or say they love you, or just some other random words of notice.
you want snc to post weekly… which they basically are doing on their react channel…….. and yet again, not good enough. you somehow want hour long vids posted weekly….. when colby's really the only one editing anymore. okay.
why is there a caveat to everything you demand from snc? i'm just genuinely curious. if it's not one thing, it's another. at this point, it would just be better in the long run to admit you're unsatisfied and will never be, and just leave. as i've stated about a million times at this point.
bc for the few 100s that are feeling this way, there are millions of fans (me included) that don't feel like snc need to do more. sure, there are certain things i would love for them to tack onto their business schedule, if they COULD do it. but i'm also not constantly threatening to either leave or off myself if they don't meet my demands.
they aren't going to. so…… LEAVE.
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Thank you so much, and yeah I agree with this! Sorry for the upcoming rant-
but one of my many many gripes with this show's canon and fandom is just how ignored Hunk's canon s1 and s2 personality is. Like sure most of the fandom from as far as I have seen has been critical of the fatphobic jokes but beyond that (and Hunk being this gentle giant, ever patient, only-exists-to-be-supportive, great cook character) there's nothing much they actually do with him at all.
Maybe I am in the wrong circles of hell but I have almost never ever seen anyone talk about what arc Hunk could have had nor have I ever seen mentioning any arc for him in their rewrites and fix its. There's nothing wrong with making character mainly for support but it is jarring to see people make thousands of posts complaining about Lance or Shiro or every other character being reduced to support role only then do the same thing with Hunk (and especially given history with Black main characters being reduced to the Best Friend archetype, this is just .......not great)
All this is a real shame because early season Hunk not only had good development especially in the first season but is also genuinely so interesting and lot more complex than people give him credit for. Yeah sure kindness and anxiety and cooking/engineering are very important aspects of his character but they are not the only ones and even those aspects are not being fully explored in the fandom at all.
He really did not trust Shiro or Allura's authority and very loudly criticized and doubted them. He doesn't trust new people at all. He is creative and smart (you have to be while dealing with alien tech and food). He is a voice of reason but not in "i don't think we should do that 🥺" But more in a "ok I am coming, but I will complain the entire time!" Way. He's naturally a curious person He is bitchy and he is insensitive (see his interactions with Keith post galra reveal). He finds entertainment in invading his friends privacy (literally first episode he reads Pidge's diary because he was bored which honestly? Hell yeah. In my heart he's a Freak™ who does this thing all the time to Lance, who is also a Freak™ in my heart but in a different direction) . The last two points are not me hating on him btw, these are things that happened in canon and I genuinely find them really interesting and wish to explore them a lot more.
Which brings me to my idea in the og post. I personally want to explore his suspiciousness, his protectiveness about people he cares about, his curiosity and how it would conflict with his kindness. You are right in how it would actually allow Hunk to do something while also keeping in line with pre established canon. It would give Hunk agency in the story (which in my opinion is severely lacking for almost all the characters in the show) and provide a more organic reveal of Lotor's betrayal (Which needs to be kept in. I am sorry to everyone who says Lotor shouldn't have been evil, but to me his characterization since his introduction only makes sense if he's 1) evil and/or 2) a fucking high int low wis idiot who thinks he's smart)
Furthermore I believe that through bringing a difference of opinions, resulting in conflict within the team, this could also help in bringing development for the characters and relationship dynamics. Maybe Allura or Kuron like in canon trust or atleast want to trust Lotor, leading them to being a bit more opposed towards Hunk's opinion, maybe Pidge kinda doesn't care enough and believes Hunk is being overly cautious etc etc.
Also agreed with Keith and Kroila being the ones to reveal Lotor's truth felt........ Random. I can't remember whether Lotor and Keith have ever even interacted with each other or even be in the same shot, so you are absolutely right in that him and Kroila being the ones to reveal Lotor's betrayal was just bad writing. Especially because they had him dealing with Lotor AND Kuron AND Sendak later on, so it feels like all the arcs and big fights were given to him even though he did nothing to earn them? (I know people say that Keith and Lotor were supposed to have parallels but aside from being half galran with mother issues, I don't really see it? (Than again I might be missing something))
I think biggest problems with Keith's narrative was that the writers wanted their cake and eat it too. They obviously wanted this badass loner version of Keith while also wanting him to be The Main Protagonist Leader who must always stay in the spotlight and is Perfect in every way. Add to that they just didn't really bother with other characters or the relationship among them at all. So you have this character who is supposed to be the main character and whose story is the one we must focus on but is also? Just incredibly removed from the plot? I don't know how to explain this, it's like he is there to get shit done but also has no stake or connection with ANY of the actual villains of the show nor the actual plot of the show, and has barely any connection (let alone a well developed one) with most of the other team members. So a lot of it feels flat and disjointed. It's why it was so easy to remove him for three whole seasons of the show, you can't do something like That with Allura Or Honerva.
And your idea with heith can fix that! I admit that I prefer Hunk's dynamics with other characters like Lance or Shay or Allura much more than heith but I do think it would work well. It can bridge the gap Keith has between himself and other characters and the actual plot, while also giving him a supporting role while still focusing on other characters such as Hunk. Furthermore this could be chance to actually confront with some of his major flaws without dismissing them as a trauma response.
All of this is speculation of course, I am no writer just merely a person with a lot of opinions about this show, but i do think it can work and your ideas and opinions make them better. So thank you for sharing them!
Going to say something controversial but I think it should have been Hunk who should have discovered Lotor's entire thing and i think he should have done so by going full Nancy Drew/S2 Jon Sims.
I have seen people say how the paladins should have trusted Lotor instead of locking him up, and i am like, "i think the guy who established himself as a cunning and dangerous enemy and who has tried to kill them multiple times should have been held under a bit more scrutiny"
Hunk in canon is actually lot less trustful, we have seen it in how he openly voiced not trusting the Lions, Rolo, etc. Hunk also loves snooping and incredibly curious of people (i would say he and Lance are the most curious when it comes to people). He has no problem reading other people's diaries (like in the 1st ep with Pidge). And while Hunk is kind he can also be bit insensitive and petty(this is not a character bashing thing btw, i love when characters have interesting flaws).
This mixed with his understandable fear and you would have a guy who is suspicious of the new guy, open about it and deciding to investigate this shit on his own when he was dismissed. He finds the plans for the portal, the still living alteans etc dtc
Whether Lotor gets a redemption arc in this scenario or not is entirely people's decisions. I am personally am fine either way
#Funny story though I also had a similar idea to yours but with hunk and lance and it was in like opposite direction?#Like it was like hunk and lance having parallel arcs with one being too suspicious while other having blind faith#Two birds on a wire type deal#I am pretty sure I made a post about it as well#Anyway I am glad you liked this post!!#voltron#Sorry for the late reply as well
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hihi! i thought abt this last night, but i fell asleep before typing jt lol-
so, non comfy cartel ask bc i'm dumb no plot
so just regular bb sykunno lol
alright now- reader lives with sykunno, no one knows this. reader says they have a boyfriend, and no one knows who it is. they also have explicitly said that they don't have corpse merch. so they're streaming, wearing sykunno's corpse merch, and sykunno peeks his head in after he did all of his among us tasks after being killed first and goes to hug them and be very clingy bc i feel like clingy-kunno would be so fricken cute, and then since proximity, he says, while chat's freaking out, something along the lines of 'can i have my hoodie back baby?' and everyone in the proximity just goes dead fricken silent and then reader and syk start laughing and explain themselves.
<33 have a good day!!
|[Relationship reveal]|
[Sykkuno x GN! reader]
-------------------------------------
Genre: fluff
Word count: 1.3K
Requested: yes
Synopsis: When you’re streaming among us, Sykkuno comes in to see you in his Corpse hoodie. Your relationship with him gets revealed and he stayes with you through the rest of the stream.
Warnings: 1 curse word, other than that just fluff
A/n: so guess who accidentally deleted the written one shot when it was nearly done? ..... I tried to write it again as accurately as the first time but I’m sorry for the hold up. I’m always down for some Sykkuno fluff though. Why do I feel like i only just figured out that's it's spelled Sykkuno instead of Sykunno??
Masterlist
-------------------------------------------
You started up stream, greeting the people that streamed into the chat as you explained that you would stream among us for a bit with Toast's lobby.
It was hard to keep up with the chat as it raced past, your eyes scanning the messages as they raced by.
Multiple people noted on the black hoodie you wore. The black fabric with the red print was easily recognisable as they asked if your corpse hoodie had finally come in.
It had become somewhat of an inside joke within your community, you often complained that the post office was screwing you over on purpose because your hoodie was the last to come in out of all your friend group.
"Yea, I guess you could say that" you addressed it with a small smile on our face, entirely forgetting to change out of Sykkuno's hoodie you had pulled on that morning.
Leaving the topic what it was, you joined the among us lobby and discord call.
You could see that Sykkuno had also already arrived in the little space ship, a Corpse mask on his little avatar as he stood beside him.
A small grin formed on your face as you selected the green striped scarf for your little avatar to wear.
In the meantime you watched chat with a side eye before you'd have to stop reading as the round begun. You muted yourself in the discord call as you thanked some new subs and donators.
The chat flashed with questions about your boyfriend, you had announced your relationship only recently but left the identity of him in the dark.
Your fans didn't know it was Sykkuno yet, but the two of you had decided it would be alright to reveal your relationship relatively soon, the fans were bound to find out one way or another and both of you preferred it being on your own terms.
The game started as you wished the others luck, clicking away the chat as you focussed on your tasks around the spaceship.
Sykkuno's little avatar walked away with Corpse to another part of the spaceship as you joined Rae with her tasks.
It was quite a peaceful round in your opinion, you ended up sharing a lot of tasks with Rae so you walked almost the entire time with each other.
The two of you talked about the food you'd be ordering after the game, discussing different cuisines and deciding on your favourites and comparing them with one another.
That peace however was disturbed as a meeting was called, teleporting you to the meeting room. You looked to see who had died, only to see the small avatar of Sykkuno crossed out at the bottom of the screen.
"Who could do such a thing!" You gasped loudly as your group started discussing.
You accused Corpse since you had seen them leave dropship together, "We split up at medbay, it could've literally been anyone."
"His body was in specimen." Toast pointed out.
"Could've been a self-report." Rae continued as the two of you vouched for one another.
“If its in specimen and Corpse left Sykkuno in medbay, then it has to be an older kill right?” Lily asked as the rest of you hummed in response.
Sykkuno could hear your bickering as he approached your streaming room. He had died relatively early in the round and had enough time as a ghost to finish his tasks.
He knocked softly on your door, in response to Rae's newest argument you hummed in agreement.
Sykkuno opened the door in response, you couldn't see him approach but as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders from behind you couldn't help but lean back into his touch.
"So there my hoodie went, I was looking for it." You pecked his cheek from the side as he rested his head on your shoulder.
Neither of you had expected the mic to pick up his words, but the way the among us lobby silenced immediately had said enough.
"Wait what the fuck? Is Sykkuno unmuted?" Lily was the first to break the silence.
Chuckles escaped your mouth as you started laughing, leaning back into your chair and into Sykkuno's hold as you laughed louder.
Beside you Sykkuno grew red as he realized what had happened, awkward chuckles joining yours as you explained to the group what was going on.
By then the meeting had ended, teleporting you back to the meeting room where you could hear your friends loudly talk over one another.
A smile was plastered on your face as you quickly turned around, pulling up a chair beside you for Sykkuno so he could stay in your room for at least the current game.
You couldn't see chat because of among us, but you knew they were most likely going insane at the news.
Sykkuno sat down beside you, his arm snaking around your waist as he pecked your cheek. As you handed him a secondary set of earphones that laid on your desk and connected them to your desktop, you repositioned your microphone to hang in between the two of you.
When your friends had congratulated you and calmed down you went on with the game, staying by Corpse's side this time as he spoke up, "So that hoodie was Sykkuno's all along"
"In my defence, it was cold and the sweater was warm. Simple math." He chuckled as Sykkuno laid his head on your shoulder, watching your monitor with a small smile on his face.
"I could've kept your hoodie behind as well and delivered it with Sykkuno's," he stopped mid-sentence as his avatar stopped moving as well, "wait but how come I didn’t see you when I brought Sykkuno's merch over?"
Sykkuno was faster to answer him as he spoke up from beside you, softly pulling you tighter against him, "Y/n went out with friends that day, didn't want to make you uncomfortable or overwhelmed or anything."
Corpse laughed softly, making a smile form both your and Sykkuno's face as you continued your tasks, "It would've been fine, but thank you for being so considerate."
You pulled Sykkuno's hand on the mouse on your desk so he could control the character on the screen partially so you could wrap your arm over his shoulder as your hand found his hair.
Your fingers tangled between the locks on the back of his head, gently messaging his scalp as a small satisfied smile formed on his face at the gesture.
"Don’t mention it, if anything you'll now have an excuse to come over again." Corpse chuckled at your joke as Sykkuno finished your tasks while you walked the character around.
It took you a few hours to finish your stream, Sykkuno by your side the entire time as he hadn't been streaming anyway, only leaving briefly to leave the lobby on his own computer.
Your hand was clasped in his as you finished the stream, saying goodbye to your chat before going offline. Leaning back in your chair, Sykkuno brushed some hair out of your face with his free hand.
"How much do you want to bet that Twitter is blowing up right now?" you warily eyed your phone which laid screen down on the side of your desk.
A small laugh escaped his lips as he hand left yours, instead cupping your cheek and gently positioning your head to face him, "No matter what Twitter says, we'll be fine."
You gave him a small smile, "I know, I know," streams were exhausting and you couldn’t wait to just be able to hang on the couch with your boyfriend, "I'm glad it's out there. Now we won't have to be so secretive about everything anymore."
Sykkuno stood up, pulling you along with him and guiding you to your living room, "we can just order take out and chill today?"
You nodded your head, smiling at how well Sykkuno knew you by now, "I love you" you muttered as he pulled you onto the couch, other hand grabbing the remote to turn your tv on.
"I love you too."
#one shot#fluff#romance#x gn reader#x reader#sykkuno#sykkuwu#sykkuno fluff#sykunno#sykkuno x reader#sykkuno imagine#gender neutral mc#gender neutral reader#gender neutral character#fanfic#sykkuno fanfic
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@copper-dragon-in-disguise @ashen-crest @isherwoodj some details! (Ish, you’ve heard some of these already, but I’ll expand on them too.
because this is public on the internet, TW for murder, family violence (very literal), cult activity, human sacrifice, and mentions of mutilation. and this isn’t a trigger warning, but the campaign is Waterdeep: Dragon Heist so i guess there might be spoilers?
characterisation/personality:
Iphigenia is an aasimar, adopted by a human noble family. she’s calm and levelheaded, the voice of reason in the party (and the most lawful), and above all kind and good-hearted. noble, yes, but has never considered herself above anyone else. quiet and introverted, but a competent networker and aspiring politician (probably). quietly charming and very polite, good at reading people, and good at influencing them when she needs to be. (stats wise: 20 CHA, 16 INT, 16 WIS). in theory, unbothered by people keeping secrets (the fighter, her best friend, has several, but Iphigenia has never thought it important to ask). likes to do embroidery in her spare time, and loves her family. oh yes, and she’s literally nineteen years old.
amusingly, I have raised my voice in RP exactly once: it wasn’t to complain about the bard who kept getting knocked unconscious and needed healing, it was to yell at the fighter for antagonising and tripping up the guy we had been asking for information and who we really did NOT need going back to his boss and badmouthing us. which he didn’t do, but he did set his retinue of thugs on us in the street, hence the bard keeping getting knocked unconscious.
backstory and New Trauma:
a couple days before the campaign, Iphigenia was murdered by her adoptive father, who was attempting to summon a devil. the summoning circle rerouted and summoned Iphigenia’s (celestial) mother instead; she resurrected Iphigenia and also granted her warlock powers. cool. (Iphigenia still has the scars though: a slit throat and a bunch of glyphs carved into her arms that boil down to the equivalent of a ‘to/from’ label on a Christmas present)
(Iphigenia’s father might also have murdered her older brother, but this is very unclear. he [the brother] disappeared three years ago, and both in and out of character I am Concerned)
as part of the campaign, the party were asked to investigate a ten year old cold case. Lord Yellowcrest, who had previously had dealings with Iphigenia’s father but shortly prior had fallen out with him, came home to find his entire family murdered. we had a diary with a ghost that suggested Yellowcrest had also been up to some sort of Contact Other Plane spell. not sus at all. he later fled the city.
so we tracked down Yellowcrest and discovered he was very much into demonic rituals. he showed us two dead bodies (also mutilated with glyphs, though different ones) and a ritual circle he was working on. Iphigenia had to be removed from the room when the sight of his bloody knife sent her spiralling into a panic attack that I’m surprised didn’t come earlier. the characters who remained in the room also confirmed he did, in fact, murder his whole family. (and he’s not sorry)
so Iphigenia has had one HELL of a week and is about to have a nervous breakdown of some variety. up to this point she has been maintaining some semblance of emotional stability, except when a panic attack is triggered or she has to talk about what happened. I think on some level, based on how I’ve been playing her, she’s been repressing it and/or it hasn’t fully sunk in.
the problem:
I cannot keep playing Iphigenia as “the same as before, but with more panic attacks”. I don’t think that’s fitting. but I do also need her to be functional as a character in the long term, even if she can have a little nervous breakdown in the short term (as a treat). I have some thoughts about how to do this mechanically, but the broader problem is roleplay — psychological and behaviour, not just mechanics.
some possible mechanics [largely drawn from the DMG Long-Term Madness table and an alternate version found on Reddit]. I intend to pick one, maybe two tops.
1) some sort of compulsion (repeated handwashing is most likely, for a sort of reverse Lady Macbeth)
2) character becomes attached to a lucky charm and suffers disadvantage on everything while over 30ft away. the lucky charm would be our fighter, but we don’t split up that much anyway?
3) character develops a tremor, inflicting a -1 penalty to relevant Strength and Dex checks. I have lowkey been describing Iphigenia having one anyway, due to forearm muscle damage.
4) unreliable sleep — roll a die every long rest, and on a 1, you can’t get a rest because of nightmares.
5) the acquisition of an additional character flaw — the Indefinite Madness table and the Haunted One background were my main sources for this, but I’m yet to find one that makes sense.
I have also discussed with my DM properly codifying a panic attack mechanic, not just rolling a die and otherwise winging it.
but none of this is properly psychological? I don’t really know what’s going on in Iphigenia’s head or how this might change her as a person, except that whatever’s going on in her head is BAD.
this has been Poor Traumatised Warlock. I love me a good angsty backstory but I might have outdone myself with Iphigenia. it’s fine, she’s fine.
my DM has very thoroughly retraumatised my character. and everyone else’s. I’m pleased about this, but I also have no idea where to begin playing my poor warlock next session. anyone want to help me figure how to break my character? (while also keeping her playable lol)
#zoe plays d&d#i have wip character tags i think i need some for d&d characters#tw murder#tw family violence#tw cult activity#tw human sacrifice#tw mutilation#also bonus points if you spot the classics reference that is the reason i chose her name
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ONCE YOU’RE GONE
rq ♥ hello!! can i please request miya twins, sakusa, suna, akaashi x fem!reader an angst one. like they got into a heated argument each other. reader just had enough, maybe take a stroll and got into a deadly accident that cost her life/ memory loss or something. and the hq char regrets it
tw ♥ angst, hurt/comfort, breakups, disappearances, very vague implications of kidnapping, memory loss & injury
a/n ♥ sorry i couldn’t think of anything for suna </3
ATSUMU MIYA
♡ he’s never really been an overly religious guy
♡ yet everyday, he finds himself praying that you’ll come back
♡ and before now, he considered himself a rather patient person, but every second you were gone was filled with anguish
♡ mostly because he knew it was all his fault
♡ nobody blamed it on him though, which only made him feel more guilty
♡ it was late, so he decided to walk you home from his house. hardly with your safety in mind though, just because he wanted to spend more time with you
♡ that was his first mistake
♡ his second was getting so defensive over his volleyball team
♡ he was talking about their recent loss to karasuno high, and how they were all devastated since they had been training for ages
♡ yet instead of comforting him, you simply replied, “maybe you should do things besides volleyball, if you’re getting so worked up about it.”
♡ but all he heard was you being condescending (though that genuinely wasn’t your intention) and telling him to give up something he is passionate about because of one little defeat
♡ you tried to explain that you honestly meant no harm by your statement but atsumu argued that the damage had already been done, hence your apology meant nothing to him
♡ realising that atsumu was just being pissy and taking his frustration at the game out on you, you distanced yourself; walking a few paces in front of him and plugging in your earbuds to tune him out
♡ after marching behind you for a few more yards, atsumu eventually decided that he was finished
♡ in one swift motion, he turned on his heels and stomped back his house, leaving you to walk the rest of the distance yourself; that was his third mistake
♡ however, after walking for about half a mile, he got a newsfeed notification on his phone titled, ‘four people reported missing in hyōgo prefecture, in the last week.’
♡ it only took one headline for all atsumu’s previous emotions to be swept away and replaced with one that left him motionless; guilt
♡ he continued walking back to his home, reasoning that you clearing didn’t want him near you — anyone could tell by the way you walked in front of him and ignored him— so he must’ve made the right choice to leave you, since it’s what you wanted, after all
♡ and it’s not like y’all broke up or anything, he still loves you and hopes you are safe and to prove that, he apologised and texted you first
♡ ‘hey, i’m so sorry i was i bit of a jerk earlier.’
♡ followed by ‘text me once you’re home.’
♡ no response, simply read at 21:45
♡ that was a week ago, yet he still wholehearted believed that you were going to come back
♡ though, deep down he knew he was just feeding himself the same line over and over again, just so that he wouldn’t feel guilty, and so that the sight of a volleyball stopped making him feel so sick and distressed
OSAMU MIYA
♡ he’s never felt such a sea of emotions at once before
♡ on one hand, he was just happy to see you alive and well; isn’t that all a lover should want?
♡ however, he didn’t have the honour of calling himself your lover anymore
♡ you didn’t remember anything from before the crash, which initially brought him a small tinge of relief, since you wouldn’t blame him for what happened
♡ however, you didn’t remember him at all
♡ so when he knelt by your bed and started apologising profusely, all you did which raise a brow and turn to the nurse, quietly — yet not discreetly — asking who the guy by your bed was
♡ he felt his hear tear apart at such a simple inquiry
♡ however, instead of explaining himself, he got up and left, “nobody.”
♡ wanting to get it all off of his chest, he told atsumu about what happened, as if he didn’t know that his brother had the biggest crush on you during your whole relationship with osamu
♡ and of course, upon hearing the news, atsumu ‘snuck out’ later to go visit you in hospital and presumably try to win your heart
♡ though, there was nothing ‘sneaky’ about the way he loudly fumbled around with the car keys, or the way he tended to slam the door behind him — atsumu knew exactly what his brother was trying to do and although it pained him to even think of losing you, he let his brother pursue you anyway
♡ he tried to protect you once and it resulted in you losing your memory, so god knows what would happen if he tried again
♡ plus, you were no longer his to protect, or at least that is what he tried to convince himself
♡ after months of daily visits from atsumu —and none from osamu — you were somewhat starting to gain your memory back
♡ atsumu just seemed so.. familiar, and that was the single best feeling when you are so isolated
♡ though, there was something off about him that you couldn’t exactly put your finger on, but he reassured you that it was because ‘seeing you hurt changed him as a man’ so of course he’s different from the way you ‘remember’ him
♡ years passed, and you continued dating atsumu in blissful ignorance of the events that happened before the accident
♡ you feel deeper in love with the atsumu you thought you knew and were forced away from osamu (who chose to remain single, he claimed it was to focus on his studies but he truly couldn’t find a second soulmate)
♡ it was only at your own wedding day were you finally able to see osamu once more, though you didn’t really interact with him much..
♡ until he objected during your vows, then, it was pretty hard to ignore him, especially since he appeared sober yet was claiming that you are his one true love, and he regrets ever leaving you
♡ needless to say, the rest of the wedding definitely did not go as planned
KIYOOMI SAKUSA
♡ he loved you; and he wished he had showed it more, now that it’s too late
♡ “sakusa,” you cooed, resting your head on his shoulder and offering him a plate of apple slices you cut yourself, while browsing the shows on TV, “what shall we watch tonight?” you inquired, but mostly to yourself since dating sakusa nowadays was similar to dating a literal rock
♡ no response, as per usual
♡ well, on the bright-side, that just meant you’d get to watch whatever you wanted, unless sakusa spoke up, which he most likely would not
♡ scanning through all your options, you decided to select some teen romance, coming-of-age movie that you knew sakusa would most definitely not enjoy, hence forcing him to say thing
♡ however, instead of him reacting in accordance to your plan, he simply got up and left without another word
♡ something about the sight of him with his back turned to you, headed out of your house and back home with even a goodbye cleared your fogged mind and left one fact undoubtedly clear; you didn’t want to be with him anymore
♡ and although you didn’t want to make assumptions, you surmised that he felt the same way; it was almost a certainty considering how distant he acted
♡ so of course you cut it off that same night; yet when you proposed the idea of breaking up, sakusa became surprisingly defensive
♡ it was as if all of a sudden he realised how shitty he had been acting this whole time, and how his actions had effected you
♡ you both yelled over the phone for hours, though it was hardly an ‘argument’, more like sakusa apologising profusely and making — what you believed to be — false promises, while you explained that you had just had enough
♡ it ended with him almost screaming ‘i love you’, but you hung up on him too soon
♡ he would never admit it, but he cried himself to sleep that night
♡ there was a part of him saying that he was just being overdramatic and you were nothing more than another lover that will enter and exit his life with the wind, but four years later, he still found himself getting butterflies upon catching a glimpse of you in the stands at one of games
♡ despite the fact you were cheering for opposite team
KEIJI AKAASHI
♡ you two were the perfect couple
♡ study dates, sliding notes to each other during class, midnight strolls, endless support, dancing in the rain; it was like you were both living in your very own slice-of-life romance movie
♡ however, as they say, all good things must come to an end
♡ but for akaashi, that ending came too quickly
♡ “you can do it, i know you can!” that must’ve been the tenth time you’ve said that today, it was like your own inspirational mantra, yet akaashi didn’t seem to be endeared by it
♡ “no, (y/n).” he repeated with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose as he began to guide you to the door, “it’s a silly dream. i probably shouldn’t have even mentioned it.”
♡ “it’s not silly!” you argued, throwing on your jacket as he made it increasingly clear that he didn’t want to continue this conversation, “it’s your dream! you can’t just keep complaining about school if you aren’t even going to try to pursue your passion.”
♡ akaashi silently shook his head, “go.” it was harsh, but he could only deal with speaking about his work life for so long
♡ “you go.” you snapped, though knowing it wasn’t exactly the comeback of the century, but it summarised your feelings well enough, “i’ve honestly had enough of you. i hope--”
♡ you cut yourself off at that; storming off before saying something you might regret
♡ though furious, you really didn’t want things to end with him, you just hoped that maybe one day you’ll be able to have a civil conversation with him about what he wants to do in life
♡ because he hides it well, but the more you got to know him, the more you noticed that he truly wasn’t happy in his studies, and you just wished he would do something about it or at the very least, let you help
♡ and he knew this too; he knew it all too well yet still couldn’t bring himself to better his life, even once you were gone
♡ you were critically injured after the accident, and during your time in the hospital, you let akaashi see you once
♡ one visit was his chance to redeem himself, to apologise and help you both align your futures together
♡ but all he could do was sit with you in radio silence
♡ thirty minutes passed and his mind was running on overdrive, yet he couldn’t think of anything to utter after ‘hello.’
♡ so he left
♡ no apology, no redemption, to attempt, nothing.
♡ all he could say was that he left with a heavy heart, a heart filled with hope that one day he could return to you despite all the wrong he has done; though that seemed more unrealistic than his dream of playing profession volleyball
♡ he had truly lost his soulmate
#osamu x reader#akaashi keiji#atsumu hcs#akaashi imagine#haikyuu atsumu#hq sakusa#sakusa drabble#sakusa scenarios#sakusa hcs#sakusa angst#atsumu angst#miya atsumu#msby atsumu#osamu angst#osamu x y/n#osamu x you#sakusa x reader#sakusa imagines#hq akaashi#👾angst
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college bf!eunwoo
a/n I LOVE HIM !! I WOULD LITERALLY RISK IT ALL FOR HIM !! also rip to the disappointing hookup experience I had that made an appearance in this headcanon...yes I’m still angry about it.
→ pairing: eunwoo x f!reader
→ genre: smut, fluff, fwb to lovers
→ tw: hookup culture, mentions of drinking and drug use, implied almost SA, this is a bit heavy compared to the other ones like please be a cautious a little when you’re reading this
→ word count: 5.6k
_______________________________
here we go ladies and gents
i had something completely different planned for this
and it was super angsty and dramatic
but i had a monumental experience last night so I’m changing this up
and okay okay
i usually try to write all my stuff gender neutral but bc of the idea I have for some of this plot, it’s gonna be a female reader
im sorry to all my male identifying loves :(
and back to our regularly scheduled program
cha motherfuckin eunwoo
lee fuckin dongmin
he doesn’t go by dongmin, he prefers to go by eunwoo, only his family calls him dongmin
as soon as he stepped foot into the university, everyone knew him
and I mean everyone
he’s so attractive
but don’t get it twisted, eunwoo’s the humblest, sweetest bean
he gets very embarrassed when people compliment him for his looks
applied for random roommates his first year and got paired up with swimmer!bin
he and bin become besties and end up rooming together their entire college career
major: music performance, specialty in piano
most people (besides those in the music department or astro) would have never thought eunwoo was a music major, especially since he was incredibly smart and athletic too???
usually gets mistaken for a STEM major
often helps the boys (especially rocky and sanha) with their studies
and oof when he tries out for–and makes it into–the basketball team
everyone ???? floored
eunwoo has game on the court...now with dating??? eh not so much
(at least not sober shh)
he’s tried dating before, at least in the first year or so
the basketball team kept trying to set him up with people
but it never got anywhere substantial and eunwoo always trusted astro to really give the vibe check and no one ever passed
and so he settled for hookup culture every now and then
his emotions are guarded :’(
yes he’s very easy to talk to and always so nice and well mannered
but he’s only himself with astro
now, where do you come into this???
you’re a cheerleader
you and eunwoo know each other by association
you cheer for his home games, you’ve been in a couple of classes together, you’ve seen each other at parties
but would you call yourselves friends?? not really
now you know it’s highly unlikely for you to have a lasting boyfriend in college, especially with your affiliation as a cheerleader, so you also opt for hookup culture
less messy feelings, less drama, less commitment, all that fun
so the first time your paths really intertwine with eunwoo is at a party
the basketball team won a big game and they were out celebrating yuh
and ofc since it’s his team, eunwoo popped out
he only really attends parties hosted by the basketball team bc he feels a bit obligated to go LOL but he always brings swimmer!bin for support
and it’s chill bc bin is also an athlete–yes it’s exclusive like that
but this time, bin couldn’t go so it’s just eunwoo hanging with his team
and yes, you can guess it, you and him get partnered up to play beer pong together!
that’s so cliche omg
but ah ha you hear your opponent, one of eunwoo’s teammates say to one of your fellow cheerleaders: don’t worry baby, I’ll carry you through this game
and you cringed a little ugh men
eunwoo turns to you like: ah sorry if we lose, it’s all luck with me. The guys usually pick to play me bc I’ll probably lose. I’ll drink the cups for you though if you want me to.
you get a little fired up, like aw why do they pick on him that’s not fair
you: well I’m not horrible at pong, so let’s try to crush em
he played pretty well ok! you both got balls back twice in a row right in the beginning
your team was on a roll
you and eunwoo won three games back to back
you were feeling a bit bloated and hazy from the beer that you and him had to drink, but you were still pretty self aware
and you and eunwoo were just chilling after playing the games, you two were on a pretty good wavelength and you wanted to continue it after joking around in between plays
alright now obviously you don’t go into these parties just strictly looking for a hookup, you go to have fun and let loose
but if the person and situation arises??? you wouldn’t necessarily turn it down, especially if that person was cha eunwoo
and yeah, eunwoo was entertaining the idea too, it’s been a while since he vibed with someone like he has with you
basically by the end of the night, you brought him back to your place–you’d rather eat shit than hook up at the basketball house, it was messy and musty and just nope
your place was closer than his
and ~yuh~
it was pretty damn good
he didn’t stay the night, bc well this was a hookup, so after you both had your fill it was a casual alright see you around!
oh lord the fuss your cheerleading team gave you at the next practice asking how your hookup with eunwoo was
the news spread like wildfire
eunwoo didn’t hook up very often so every time he did, it was like breaking news
which is honestly a bit fucked up, but seriously this is how college is
alright so your sex drive skyrocketed after fucking eunwoo
you hook up with another guy at one of the following parties
but it didn’t compare to eunwoo rip so you were pretty disappointed
and you were sorta wondering like hm? should you hit him up? but decided against it
and then! you saw him at the gym working out with literally all of astro
bin probably forced the other 4 to come with him and eunwoo sksksksk
and you were like shit why does he look so good
not gonna lie, just in case he was looking over, you tried to make your ass and tits pop out a bit more, you know squats and shit
unfortunately, it caught the attention of other guys at the gym and not eunwoo grrr
and you were literally just planning to stop being a coward and go up and talk to him, but a guy blocked your path
and he was lowkey being very creepy and way too close for your liking
but you weren’t having it, hell no you ain’t a damsel in distress
being a cheerleader taught you how to defend yourself against predatory men
so you were basically telling him to fuck off and leave you alone, but he was being really damn persistent about it
and just as the guy was about to put a hand on you, eunwoo steps in and he’s like: dude, she’s clearly not interested, fuck off.
after a bit of a stare off, the guy leaves and wow you’re face to face with eunwoo again hehehe
his eyes switch from a glare to a soft worried look and he’s like, hey are you okay?
and you’re like a little giddy, maybe also a little bit turned on bc he’s still like fresh from a workout, his hair was brushed back revealing his forehead, his arm muscles were really defined right now, and just he’s so hot?
but you smile nonchalantly, you genuinely could have just slapped the shit out of the guy or kicked him right in the baby factory, but eunwoo stepping in was also a pleasant surprise, you weren’t complaining
you: yeah. I could have handled it, but thanks for helping
and he just grins, your confidence?? attractive
the two of you just like look at each other for a couple seconds and you’re yelling at yourself in your head like don’t cop out this is what you were waiting for !!
you: so...you’re here with your friends?
eunwoo: yeah, me and my roommate forced them to come work out with us haha. did you come by yourself?
you: yeah, I usually work out with my teammates, but I decided to come alone today
eunwoo nods and you see him like look at your neck and you immediately get a bit shy bc you knew there was a hickey there from your last (very disappointing) hookup: you’ve been having fun recently?
your face flushes: the last one was embarrassing really, so honest to god no
eunwoo: why was it embarrassing? if...you don’t mind me asking
you immediately facepalm: no, yeah I don’t mind telling you...ugh, eunwoo I was literally catfished. this guy really talked mad game about his dick and then when I agreed to hook up, he asked me to suck him off and it literally only took him less than ten minutes. and after he came, he just pulled up his pants and said “damn you give really good head” like the fuck? he didn’t even offer to return the favor or anything, and when I asked him “wait, are we gonna fuck?” he just said “maybe next time.” maYbE neXt tiMe?? I was played so hard, you have no idea how pissed I was, eunwoo. and now I have to wait for his dumb fucking hickey to heal so that I can literally just repress that hookup even happened.
his jaw literally dropped: he didn’t give you anything?
you shook your head, you were getting pissed again
eunwoo couldn’t believe his ears, he glances back at astro for a second and then he clears his throat: well...what are you doing after the gym?
you: nothing, just going home and taking a shower. My roommate’s not gonna be home tonight so I’m probably gonna wallow in my sorrows about that hookup again
he laughs: well sounds like you have a fun night planned, but if you want some company?? I’d be more than happy to come over and help you forget about the sad disrespect of that hookup.
who said eunwoo couldn’t flirt ???
and he was thinking about hitting you up again too before but he didn’t wanna seem like a fuckboy or anything
but seeing you defend yourself against the guy?? lowkey was a bit of turn on for him
obviously you agreed hello
eunwoo going up to astro: so uh...imma head out first...I’ll see you guys later. :)
sanha: hyung so scandalous *O*
you and eunwoo fuck again
and after this time, the two of you have a little bit of pillow talk
basically you tell him that fucking him ruined all other guys for you bc he was just that good
and eunwoo usually gets shy from compliments, but his ego with this one??? he felt a bit proud ohohoho
and he’s like: honestly, you’re the only person I’ve fucked in six months, but I gotta agree that our sexual chemistry is pretty good
so where do you two go from there?
friends with benefits baby, full on fuck buddies
you both talk and agree that you two weren’t looking for relationships at the moment, but the sex was good
i’m gonna get into specifics later, but for now a little more plot
obviously, you and eunwoo talk a lot more now that you two were basically fucking each other at least once a week
the guys notice that he’s so much more?? carefree?? less stressed out?? ever since you and him started your little agreement
and they’re already scheming by themselves, like eunwoo would not get into a situation like this unless he trusted you as a person
and at first it was really just, call each other over, have sex, stay for a little bit longer, then leave
neither of you ever stayed the night bc that’s just an unspoken rule
until there was this one party, a group of people were in one of the rooms at the basketball house and they told you to come join them and ~do drugs~
don’t dabble kids, I’m serious
and you were chilling with eunwoo and bin for a bit until they called you over and you were like: wanna try too?
eunwoo and bin didn’t do it obviously, but you were curious so you went and told them you would be back in a bit
eunwoo was worried about you, bin could see it from a mile away
he kept glancing back at the room and one by one people started to come out, but none of them were you
bin nudging eunwoo: go check up on her
eunwoo opens the door to see you being like pinned down on the bed and he turns livid
he pulls the guy off you and punches him right in the face like: what the fuck do you think you’re doing? what did you give her?
you’re noticeably out of it, sobriety? not there
the guy basically laced something in the drug he gave you, omg you were roofied??
bin comes in and he literally has to hold eunwoo back from beating the shit out of the other guy
the two take you back to their apartment and were making sure that you didn’t die or something shit
literally cannot believe the first time you slept over at eunwoo’s place was when you were drugged up
you wake up the next morning, nauseous, body weak, and confused
eunwoo also wakes up because of your movement: hey y/n, are you okay?
you: eunwoo...what...what happened last night??
he sits up and gives you a recount of the party and you just like hug your body tightly when he brings up the drugs and start crying
he’s a bit shocked when he sees your tears, but he just pulls you in for a hug to try and comfort you, obviously that must have been a bit traumatic
eunwoo: hey...it’s okay...I’m just glad I checked up on you before something worse happened
you: I’m such a fucking idiot...I can’t believe I let myself get put in that situation again...no wonder people think I’m a just a dumb whore.
~trauma~
you and him spill your deepest darkest most traumatizing secrets that morning and you just feel more connected to him
you: I honestly never really told anyone...thanks eunwoo, you’re a good friend.
he feels more protective of you after that??
you start hanging around with him and astro more
and the guys really like having you around !!
you’re very easy to get along with, you also joke and tease eunwoo with them, they love you !
you even become really friendly with the other guys’ partners
about half a year into your fuck buddy relationship with eunwoo
everyone: why aren’t you dating y/n yet?
eunwoo: what do you mean?? we’re just friends...with benefits??
before you even know it, you’re spending literally all your time (when you’re not training or practicing or at class) with eunwoo and his friends
you sleep more at eunwoo’s than you do at your own apartment
honestly you two are already acting like a couple
except for the fact that you only kiss each other when you’re fucking, or you don’t hold hands in public, or you don’t say the L word to each other obviously
but the cuddles? the jokes? the hanging out? if you two are seen together there’s still a little form of physical touch––like a hand on the waist, or resting his elbow on your shoulder––something that tells other people that you two are a bit exclusive to each other
and maybe it’s because both of your emotional capacities when it comes to relationships are akin to a pubescent thirteen year old, but you and eunwoo?? don’t really realize that you’re both basically in love with each other
and it’s also the fact that catching feelings in a friends with benefits?? forbidden
but what if both people catch feelings?
you don’t realize you like eunwoo until a year of fucking each other
damn a year?? y’all really suppressed those romantic feelings hard
you and him were hanging out, per usual, but in the piano rooms of the music building
eunwoo had to practice his repertoire for an upcoming performance and you were free so you decided to come along and keep him company
you knew he was a music major and that he played piano, but you never actually heard him play
you were just chilling by the window, scrolling through your phone, and then he just starts playing and your jaw?? literally dropped
it was so intricate and fluid and elegant, you looked over to the keys and his hands just moved so expertly over them
you were put in a trance, it was so beautiful??
and then you look up and his concentration? seriousness? he has honestly never looked more attractive to you than in that moment
and then eunwoo meets your eyes and he smiles a little: is it bad?
you: no, you’re amazing actually...
and your stomach does a triple somersault and your cheeks start heating up, like why is your heart going haywire???
you start spacing out and obviously he notices
eunwoo calls your name and pats the space next to him on the piano bench
eunwoo: what are you thinking of, hm?
you: n-nothing. keep playing, I wanna hear more
and so he does and your heart just won’t chill out, especially now that you’re literally sitting mere centimeters apart from him
he’s still playing and you just can’t stop thinking about how much you want to kiss him–and not in a sexual way
and that honestly scared you, so you panicked and put your hand near his crotch
eunwoo jolts in surprise, but he doesn’t say anything, he just chuckles and continues playing
do you have sex in the piano room to try and distract yourself from whatever you were feeling? yeah
you hide your feelings for a little bit, but the more time you spent with him, the stronger they got, and you honestly didn’t know what to do
so you tried distancing yourself, you gave eunwoo the excuse that cheerleading competitions were coming up–which they were, so it wasn’t a complete lie–and you needed to focus and have time to yourself
it was so weird for you not seeing him and astro all the time, you barely responded to his text messages or calls, and when you saw him around campus, you would immediately try to avoid him, and it hurt but you were ~scared~
eunwoo’s a smart boy, he knew something was off with you
but after a week of trying to contact you, he didn’t wanna seem annoying or a bother, so he tried not to
even though all he wanted was to see you or talk to you, like it was beyond sex at this point
he missed you, he thought he was going to go insane
he didn’t realize his feelings for you until he saw you talking to a guy in the athletic building
he had basketball practice, and you just finished your cheerleading practice
you were talking to this one guy from your philosophy class, basically joking around and talking shit about your professor
and eunwoo saw you smile at something the guy said and he just felt jealous
his fists clenched, he hated seeing you smile and laugh with the guy like how you used to do with him
and it also didn’t help that you and him haven’t really talked in two or three weeks and he just missed you so much :(
he tried not to think about it during his practice, but it didn’t work, he was off his game for this one, even his teammates and coach noticed it
he went back to his place after practice and called over the boys and basically vented his frustrations
jin: eunwoo. you like y/n
eunwoo: I know...fuck what do I do
bin: tell her, obviously
eunwoo: and risk our?? friendship??
myungjun: you’re a fucking idiot if you don’t see that she likes you back
rocky: yeah...I mean why else do you think noona started distancing herself from you?
eunwoo: maybe I’m just feeling like this because we haven’t met up in a while and I saw her talking to that guy and I don’t know? I’m horny?
sanha: hyung...you sound indenial and jealous.
bin: you like her. we’re surprised you didn’t realize this earlier.
anyway, the day of the competition comes, and the guys and their partners decide to pop out and support you
and seeing them actually made you feel so warm, you wave at them brightly and you meet eyes with eunwoo and you smile at him even though the butterflies are back and at full force
the group is so proud watching you and your team compete, their cheers are debatably the loudest and you literally have to stop yourself from laughing in the middle of your routine
your school places first yuh
and after talking with your team and discussing celebration plans, you go to the group
you were having such an adrenaline rush, you immediately run up to eunwoo in a crushing hug and you kiss him
eunwoo doesn’t even hesitate to kiss you back
astro and them: ohohoho hey
you: I’m so happy you all came! I can’t believe we actually won!
you were going to celebrate with your team bc you knew they were throwing a party, but celebrating with eunwoo and astro/their partners seemed way more appealing to you
you all go out to dinner and drink a little bit casually and it’s all such good vibes
you missed hanging around with them all and it just felt so right
eunwoo rested his hand on your thigh the whole time throughout dinner, he missed you alright, and just seeing you so happy with all his friends? he was hooked
when the group parts ways, it’s just you and eunwoo heading back to his place bc bin is spending the night at his partner’s apartment
and honestly the tension is so thick between you two
you barely make it past the door before you’re both latched onto each other, making out and all that steamy stuff
after you have sex, the two of you are having that post-sex cuddle in his bed and your heart is pounding so loud
you: hey...I’m sorry if it was weird that I kissed you earlier at the venue, I don’t really know what came over me, I was just so glad to see you guys
eunwoo: you don’t have to apologize for that y/n...I missed you
you roll around so that your back is to him bc you do not have the strength to look at him in the eyes right now
eunwoo hugs your waist and pulls you in his chest, he’s spooning you and he has no plans on letting you go any time soon
you: uh...eunwoo, I-we-uh maybe we should stop this...thing from going any further
he literally freezes: ...did I do something wrong?
you: no! it’s...I...fuck I don’t know how to say this...I know we’ve been hooking up for a year but just recently I...think I have feelings for you...and it’s not fair for either of us to continue this if we’re not on the same page.
eunwoo: y/n, I–
you’re rambling now, you’re scared of what he has to say: and honestly you’ve become someone I really don’t wanna lose in my life. You’re an amazing person and friend, and I don’t wanna fuck that up by having feelings for you, especially since you probably don’t feel the same. I just...can’t have casual sex with you anymore...I’m sorry, it would break me.
you’re like trying to get up and you tell him that you’re going to go to the party your team’s hosting but he just tightens his grip
eunwoo: don’t go...please
you: eunwoo, I can’t stay here–
eunwoo: you don’t even know what I feel, y/n...why are you so sure that I don’t feel the same way as you?? because I do...honest to god, y/n, I like you so fucking much. the month that you didn’t talk to me was like hell and I don’t ever wanna experience that again. I missed you so much I thought I was going crazy...please don’t go.
you roll around and face him again
you: y-you like me? you’re not just saying that because you want to keep having sex?
eunwoo: I’m not just saying that because of the sex...I promise
you: so...what does that make us now?
eunwoo: well would you do me the honors and be my girlfriend?
god finally you two are dating
you realize that not much really changes after the two of you make it official
the pda does increase though, you actually hold hands and kiss each other in public now
and you two are more cutesy with each other
yes astro pretends to gag whenever they see you act all coupley
petnames!! you call each other baby, sometimes you call him minnie!! as in dongminnie !! im screaming!!
a poster couple, the basketball player and the cheerleader
literally when you’re both wearing your uniforms and you kiss each other, it’s like one of those teen movies
lots of forehead kisses especially right before bed
eunwoo’s a clingy cuddly boy, especially now that you two are together
lots of study dates?? he is a scholar after all
you’re each other’s biggest supporters !! you always go to all of his recitals and basketball games, he always goes to your competitions
he’s very soft okay, will never stop showing you off or telling you how much you mean to him and how much he loves you
the first I love you came shortly in the relationship, and that’s because you’ve known each other a year prior and the feelings were really just building up since then
you were in the piano room again and he was just playing for fun, but you always loved hearing him ~tickle those ivories~
he was playing a song and singing along and you swear you had heart eyes for him, his voice was so soft and gentle and just wow
you’re sitting next to him and you just hug his waist while he’s playing
eunwoo’s smiling so wide and then he’s singing to you
he doesn’t even get to finish the song, because you’re grabbing his face and kissing him
he’s laughing in between kisses and you can’t help but laugh with him
grrr he’s so cute!
and then you two are just looking at each other
eunwoo: hm?
you: I love you, minnie
he doesn’t miss a beat: I love you too, y/n
you and him have a lot of deep talks together, especially right before bed
it’s the time when he can just let out all the frustrations of the day and just be with you
he actually holds a lot of pressure and worries, but knowing that you’re by his side, comforts him a lot
the two of you have so many pictures together it’s so cute
eunwoo’s a bit possessive alright, not in the toxic way, but will he tighten his grip on your waist if a guy seems to be getting a little too friendly with you? yeah
not gonna lie, you get possessive too, it’s hard especially if your boyfriend is cha eunwoo, he’s the fucking perfect package god dammit
you both tell each other that you don’t have to worry about other people bc y’all are just both so whipped for each other
but it’s still cute when either of you are jealous
he’s actually pretty into couple items, but it has to be like minimalistic-style
like matching plain color hoodies or matching pajama sets
will not wear a “he’s mine, she’s mine” shirt or something
but it’s okay bc neither would you sksksk
will he wink at you if he makes a three pointer during his game? yeah.
literally loves when you wear his clothes or fuck, his jersey?? a turn on
and here we go !! I’ve been talking about sex so much but let’s get into it !!
in the beginning, like before you two started dating, when it was just your fuck buddy friendship, it was sexy
and not saying that it’s not sexy now that you two were in a relationship, but before it was just lust
eunwoo’s a freak alright, you can’t convince me otherwise
he’s a little kinky
definitely into food play, you two use whipped cream during foreplay a little too much...
100% into anal
you know how much he loves ass, has a very nice ass himself
and we already been knew, but yes he’s an ass guy
s p a n k i n g
eunwoo seeing you in your cheerleading skirt? immediate turn on
will literally fuck you while you’re wearing your skirt...just your skirt.
alright alright, you have a hand kink...was it awoken by watching eunwoo play piano all the time? yes
does eunwoo use that to his advantage? yes
the amount of times he’s fingered you??? vaginal and anal??? lord have mercy
very much into overstimulation, will keep fingering you until you squirt
and yes im bringing back my the choking kink
literally if his hands make any contact with your neck area, even when he’s just kissing, you will drench
but ugh you and eunwoo making out and you know how he like cups the back of the neck?? i know y’all have seen it from the true beauty kiss scenes, and then it gets heated and his grip just moves to the front and squeezes and when your mouth opens in a gasp, he shoves his tongue down your throat
that’s so sexy
do you like choking on his cock? probably more than you should
does he make you deep throat until tears are literally streaming down your face? most definitely
he loves marking you?? it’s just a tell tale way to show everyone you’re his
he’s a bit feisty...will he manhandle you during sex?? yeah
eunwoo is a dom. I am 100% convinced that he is a dom, you won’t be domming him honey
daddy and babygirl kink...I said it...
okay he’s a bit of an exhibitionist...would probably be down to have sex anywhere as long as you don’t get caught
piano room sex? locker room sex? library sex? movie theater sex? restaurant bathroom sex? yes you’ve done it all
will he finger you while you guys are having a movie night with the guys? yeah
eunwoo’s a tease, he’s a little shit, will tease you until you’re literally in tears begging for him to just do something
favorite position is doggy, it’s the view of the ass for him
although you two both do like experimenting different positions, especially if it has to do with “training your flexibility”
will pull your hair while he’s fucking you from behind, and will plug your asshole with his thumb–don’t knock it until you try it...it’s...a pretty good feeling
sometimes wakes you up by eating you out
very much a giver ugh king
the type to grip your thighs tighter when you try to push him away from overstimulation just to force another orgasm out of you
believe it or not, he’s a gasper/grunter/groaner
nothing is hotter than hearing eunwoo groan right when he’s about to cum oooof grrrr bark bark
okay but soft gentle sex with eunwoo is so passionate
all you feel is the love and sincerity, especially when he’s just looking in your eyes
the love making happens a lot more obviously when you start dating
he’s just so in love with you alright
gives the best and sweetest after care ugh
cleans you up, gives you massages especially if it was a rough session, cuddles you, draws you a bath, brings you water, everything
always makes sure to tell you he loves you after sex
i would risk it all for eunwoo like please ruin my life
anyway
ugh I just wanna put the idea of protective eunwoo during a party in your head
his hand is always on you. waist, thigh, shoulder, anywhere casually
you don’t fight?? but you do argue
arguing is healthy, and you both would rather let it out and bicker with each other in the moment than let it bottle in and build up into something worse
but when you do have a disagreement, no matter how big or small, you two always make sure to never go to bed angry with each other
communication is very important for the both of you
you’re his better half :’) all the things eunwoo struggles with, you help him with it and vice versa
he figured out you were the one for him during one of your deep late night pillow talks
he was worried about what he’d do in the future after graduating, like he was genuinely having a crisis about it
but you just talked so calmly to him: baby, no matter where you end up after graduation or what you end up doing, you’re going to be fine. You’re such a hard worker and I know that you’ll succeed...no matter what, I’ll be here for you minnie. I believe in you, you’re future is going to be great.
and he just kisses you so sweetly: will you be in my future, baby?
you’re smiling and you just giggle at him: if you want me to be...I’d love to be a part of it.
ugh y’all are so whipped for each other !!
astro always teasing you two, even when you’re all older
you and eunwoo are equally ticklish so basically y’all are fucked when they wanna mess with you
both of your families love you and him instantly
they push marriage immediately after you both graduate college
even astro’s like: we know you two are probably gonna tie the knot first...when’s the wedding?
not gonna lie, you and eunwoo probably get married probably 2-3 years after college, pretty young age
sidenote: eunwoo 100% cries at your wedding, especially when he sees you walking down the isle in your dress
and he has huge baby fever so you bet y’all had kids fairly young too
the best dad !! ugh he loves kids !! ugh so domestic
im just gonna say, y’all have beautiful children
trusts bin and jinjin to babysit your kids the most...he’s scared of the rest of the boys watching over his children
anyway eunwoo literally deserves the world and I just?? love him so much?? happy ending yay hehe
_________________________________________
2-21-21
#college bf!eunwoo#college bf!astro#cha eunwoo#eunwoo#dongmin#lee dongmin#astro#astro eunwoo#eunwoo scenarios#eunwoo fluff#eunwoo fic#eunwoo smut#eunwoo au#eunwoo headcanons#astro scenarios#astro fluff#astro fic#astro smut#astro au#astro headcanons
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Take Your Feelings, Put Them Into a Song (A.I)
Pairing: Ashton Irwin x Wallows! Fem! Reader
Requested: yes!
Summary: Y/N Sixx, bassist from the famous band Wallows, is helping 5SOS write their latest album CALM. If only she could keep her crush on the drummer under control…
Warnings: Fluff. Language. Some grammatical errors (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)
Word Count: 4.6 k
Author’s Note: IM BACK! Remember that Reblogs, Likes, Comments and Feedback are very important! You have no idea how much they help 💕 Hope you like it and Happy Reading 🦋🌻✨
My materialist // wanna be part of my tag list?
anon: Can you do a one-shot where the reader was born on 1996 and she’s the daughter of Nikki Sixx and Brandi Brandt and it’s the bassist and songwriter of Wallows (…) and she helps 5sos write songs for the album CALM and starts dating Ashton and the fans go nuts (in a good way) with shipping? There’s no drama like it was in EUH
It was another boring day in the studio and you would literally prefer to do anything else than to listen to Cole talk about the last date he had instead of working on your new song. But inspiration was lacking between you and your bandmates and you really had no other choice since you already took that time on the studio’s schedule.
One would believe that you would be used to dull times in the studio, having spent a lot of time on them while growing up with your parents, but boredom was a cruel crime inside your head and today your patience was running thin.
“Hey, peanut!” Dylan called your attention “Everything good there?”
You were laying on the sofa, looking at the ceiling for some kind of saving grace, but Dylan’s voice brought you back to your reality.
“Are we going to get something done today?” You asked with a sigh, with your eyes still glued to the ceiling “Cause we are really just wasting time by now and I don’t think Cole’s last fling will bring any kind of inspo into our little group”
“Hey!” Cole protested, earning a chuckle from Braeden.
“Whatever,” You said, already getting up from your spot “I’m going to take a walk”
You took a deep breath once you closed the door to your private room. You loved the guys, you really do, but sometimes people can be too much, especially people who you spend every single day and hour with.
Memories from the past year started to fill your mind and you smiled when thinking about how much your little band has grown. Wallows was now everywhere, you created a name for yourself without using your parent’s influence and you were so damn proud of that, yet when moments like these come around - the moments where you just need to breathe to escape the reality for just a while - you start to reflect on every choice you made and if they were the right ones.
It’s the overthinking that got you to write those first lyrics in the first place, the ones that were put into songs and now were, somehow, all over TikTok with thousands of people relating to them. So maybe, overthinking now might not be such a bad idea after all.
“It’s a terrible idea if you think about it for more than one minute, mate”
You stopped in your tracks when you heard that voice, thinking that maybe you were finally going crazy or someone could’ve read your mind. But it wasn’t until you heard someone else answer that you realized it was a conversation.
“Well, I don’t know what to do with it anymore!”
You turned your head to the left and smiled when you saw the little sign that said “5SOS now in session. DO NOT DISTURB” And realized that your other favorite boys were back in town.
Of course you ignored the sign and knocked on the door a couple of times before opening it shamelessly.
“Well, well, well…” You said with a teasing smile as you leaned over the door frame “If it isn’t my second favorite Aussie band”
The faces of two of the members of said band light up once they realize it was you, quickly getting up to wrap you in a hug.
“Mini Sixx!” Calum said, ruffling his hand through your hair “About time you came to visit us”
You pushed him and Luke away from you “And you should’ve told me you’re back from your break! I could’ve escaped Dylan and the other minions earlier”
“Rough session?” Luke asked, seating down and patting the place next to him for you to sit on.
“Oh, you have no idea”
You loved the 5sos guys, it was impossible not to. Ever since you met them at a label party in 2015 when you were introduced to them because you were the same age as half of the group, you knew that they were made to be on the stage.
It was easy to become their friend, given their welcoming attitude and easy-going smiles even before they found out who your parents were. It was nice for a change not to be Y/N Sixx, daughter of the famous bassist of Mötley Crüe and famous Playboy doll Brandi Brandt, for a moment and just be Y/N, a bassist that had a lot to give to the world. And with the boys you didn’t even have to try to be someone you were not, with them everything was just so… real.
Just like now, where you were allowed to complain about your lovely bandmates to them and they would complain just as well, with no judgment nor responsibilities, just three friends letting out some steam due to the stress of your careers.
“-And basically we don’t know what else to do with the song” Luke finished his rant on the missing piece of their new song for their next album.
“And you have the lyrics ready?”
“Yeah, me and my girl wrote it a few weeks ago but the melody is just…”
“It’s missing something” Calum finished for him with a sigh.
You hummed “Can I see it?”
The two Australians got to work, playing the song with the piano and the guitar and you came to the conclusion that they were right: there was something big missing.
“So it’s a ballad,” You said, thinking of ways to fix it.
“Technically yes, but when you play it like that it sounds incomplete and the lyrics won’t work with another type of rhythm” Luke sighed “We’ve been at it for days now.”
You stayed quiet for a while, reviewing the lyrics and melody more carefully now, analyzing the situation with different approaches but without getting anywhere. It was a beautiful song, it truly was, but it needed something else, something that could create a “boom” sensation for whoever was listening.
Something like…
“Hey guys, have you finished with the- Oh, Hey, Y/N/N!” Ashton said, opening the door and finding you with his bandmates in deep concentration.
Bingo.
“Uh, why are you smiling at me like that?” Ashton asked you with a chuckle, but you didn’t even address him as you turned to Luke and Calum.
“It needs drums”
“What?” The three men said in unison. You rolled your eyes and snatched the notes from Calum’s lap and started to sing the melody.
“Here!” You pointed out “In this part, before finishing the first chorus: I already made, already made that…” And then you started to make drum noises and movements with your arms for them to get the idea.
In a matter of seconds, Luke got up from his seat and walked towards you, taking the notes from you and reviewing them with new eyes, smiling as he got the idea.
“Ha!” He laughed loudly, “You’re a fucking genius!”
“Thank you,” You said with a smug smile as you, Calum and Luke started to discuss the arrangements.
“Wait, hold up” Ashton interrupted the chatter “Y/N, I appreciate you trying to help and no offense and all but I think this isn’t your place to just decide something like that,” He said, pointing to the three of you.
You rolled your eyes. You’ve dealt with stubborn people before, but Ashton did take a spot on your top three and you knew just how to handle him.
“Wow,” You said sarcastically with a teasing smile “One would think that by being half of the rhythm section you would have more… I don’t know, rhythm?”
Ashton crooked an eyebrow and you and you knew you had him in the bag “I just don’t think-”
“You don’t think?” You said, getting up from your chair and walking up to him to be almost chest to chest. You looked up to his eyes and challenged him “Or you just can’t handle the fact that I might’ve had a better idea than you”
You could see by the sparkle in his eyes that he has taken the challenge to heart. He took a step closer to you, almost pressing his body completely against yours, and smirked.
“Want me to prove you wrong, princess?” He teased but you didn’t back up.
“I’d like to see you try, darling”
Ashton’s smirk widened as he took a step back, turning his head towards Luke and Calum who were watching the scene with intrigued eyes and knowing smiles “Get your asses back in the recording booth”
He followed them as they walked into the big recording space they had, but not before sending you a wink seconds after he closed the door.
You were thankful he didn’t see you blush.
Once they were all set with their instruments - Calum on the keys, Luke on the guitar, and Ashton behind his drum set - You pressed the buttons of the console that would make it possible for you to hear them at the other side of the mirrored glass.
“Okay boys, show me what you got”
*
You became an official 5SOS songwriter after that day and even Ashton had to admit that you were adding so much more to the band lyrics and melodies since you started to work with them.
Every day you would find yourself walking towards their studio after your band’s session and you start to work wherever they left off. It was a simple dynamic that worked wonders for everyone and after every session, you would get even more inspired to write your own music for Wallows, so it was a win-win situation, not to mention, spending time with your new co-workers; especially a particular drummer that grew closer to you that you would’ve ever imagined.
When you first met the band you hit it off pretty quickly with Luke and Calum, them being the same age as you and having pretty much the same interests; then came Michael that shared a similar sense of humor with you and with whom you discussed videogames with. But Ashton was always the one that you consciously tried to not get too close to.
In all honesty, he intimidated you but not in a bad way. He was smart, talented, and super funny, not to mention also ridiculously handsome. But he was also stubborn, a little bit egotistical, and the only one that could keep up with you in a battle of wits, teasing, and sarcasm. And you knew that if you mixed that all together it might mean trouble, especially when he smiled at you like that.
Of course you had a crush on him, who wouldn’t? But the fact is that you know what it is like to date in the industry and having feelings for a member of another pretty famous band might bring some tension to the table, so it was safer to play the crushing card and just stay friends. Or at least that’s what you tell yourself every day since you started to see him regularly and spend more time with him than with any other of the two bands.
Speaking of…
“Earth to Y/N?” Called Braeden waving a hand in front of your face “Is anybody there?”
You blinked a few times before pushing his hand away with a scoff “Very funny, B. What’s up?”
“You spaced out again” Cole added, fidgeting with his drumsticks “Just when we were going to start complimenting you on that bass line you wrote the other day…”
You smiled as you threw a pillow at him that he was able to easily dodge “Sorry, I was just-”
“Thinking about a particular drummer again?” Dylan teased, to which Cole added.
“I knew it wouldn’t take long for you to fall in love with me”
You searched for other pillows and started to throw them at your band members, giggling as they started to throw them back at you and starting an improvised pillow fight in the middle of the recording booth.
“Hey, Y/N/N! I was wondering if you-” Ashton’s sentence was cut short as he opened the door and took in the scene that was in front of him.
You were so busy chasing Breaden with a pillow on each hand and a devilish smile that you didn’t even notice when the door opened or that Ashton was standing there, smiling at you with his arms crossed as you aimed at your bandmate's head.
“Oh look, peanut!” Dylan said teasingly “You knight in shiny armor is here to-” But before he could say anything more embarrassing, you threw a pillow directly at his face to shut him out.
You quickly turned your head to Ashton who was fairly amused by your battle skills and smiled at him.
“Hey!” You said breathlessly after chasing down the others.
“Hi,” He smiled back “Am I interrupting something or?”
“Nah, you’re good,” You said, throwing one last pillow at your three friends that stood in a corner blowing teasing kisses and puppy eyes at the two of you “These assholes and I are done for the day” You commented before said assholes started to pout and complain, but you were already out the door before they could say something embarrassing again.
“So…” Ashton trailed off, starting to walk alongside you with his hands in his front pockets.
“So,” You said, drifting your eyes from him and praying to the universe that he didn’t hear anything or else it would make the blush on your face even pinker “You needed me for something?”
You wanted to get the topic of work right there in the open as soon as possible, not wanting him to notice how nervous you got when you were alone with him. At least when you were talking about work you leveled the ground in some parts.
“Actually, I’m going home early today” He smiled softly “Luke and the guys are working on a love song that’s just way too happy and butterflies - in - your -stomach like and I didn’t think they needed me there if I can’t bring nothing to the table”
“You’re not a lovey-dovey feeling kinda guy?” You teased by bumping your arm with his, earning a “hey” from him “I actually get it, I’m not that kind of person either”
“It’s not like I don’t like it, it’s just that-”
“You process your emotions differently, and it’s easier to write those when you think of love in other stages and/or mixed with other complex emotions because-”
“Love is not just one-sided! Yes!” Ashton celebrated, amazed that you could understand what he was saying “I knew you would get it”
That comment made your cheeks heat up as you looked at him, all dimpled smiles and light chuckled as he looked at you with sparkly hazel eyes. Oh no…
“Well,” You said, breaking that little moment “If they are going to work on that all day then I guess I would head home, too. I don’t think I’ll be able to provide anything else either”
“Actually,” Ashton said as he stopped in the middle of the hall leading to the exit, making you stop as well and turn to him “I was wondering if you would want to get some coffee with me now that we are both free. Of course, if you really are free and have nothing else to do and want to actually drink coffee or tea… or maybe not and you’re not that type of person and-”
“Are you asking me out?”
Ashton stopped his rambling and looked at you with an incredulous smile and lightly blushed cheeks.
“I- well, yeah,” He said shyly “Yeah, I am”
You smiled and softly chuckled “Look at the famous drummer all nervous” You teasingly took a step closer to him, not knowing where this confidence was coming from, and he did the same “It’s just me, you know?”
“And that’s exactly the reason why”
“Do I make you nervous, darling?”
“Let’s say that if it were anyone else, I wouldn’t have rambled like that, princess”
You pressed your lips in a thin line and smiled as you looked away from him, blushing like a teenager on her first date.
“So…” You trailed off.
“So?”
“Lead the way”
*
From that moment both of your routines changed once again. Now you took time off the studio at least two times a week to go with Ashton on those small friendly dates as he took you out for coffee or just simple but meaningful talks.
Soon enough you lost all the doubts that made you nervous around him, seeing how easy it was to talk to him and how much you had in common in more aspects than just music. You became more comfortable around him and your level of teasing and playing grew alongside your relationship, not to mention the level of teasing and playing you received from your band members and the other 3 Aussies who joined in on all the fun.
You were used to blushing and dismissing comments about your - undeniable - crush on the drummer, but Ashton didn’t seem to be affected by them at all. On the contrary, Ashton played along and even seemed like he was enjoying it. Like in one particular occasion where you were working on a song together and Michael said:
“Oh my god, date her already!”
Ashton didn’t blink an eye before responding “I’m trying! But she just wants to focus on the harmonies”
And you’d be lying if you said that didn’t put a smile on your face.
Yet, you kept it all professional while being in the studio; no need to mix your personal lives with whatever was going on down there, that’s why those coffee runs were your favorites.
It was an unspoken rule between the two of you that “work-talk” was forever banned from those outings.
“So what are we going to talk about?” You asked him the first time you went into his favorite coffee shop.
“Us” He simply answered, unaware of the butterflies he just set in your stomach.
“Us?”
“Yeah, I want to get to know you better, princess. Who is Y/N Sixx?”
“Who is Ashton Irwin?”
“I asked first”
“I asked second” You countered
Ashton smiled widely “You think you’re clever…”
“It doesn’t matter what I think” You answered, casually sipping on your coffee “I know I’m clever just like I know you like me that way”
You were testing the waters back then, hiding the shaking of your knees under the table as you longed to know how he felt about it. But the way he smiled and how he blushed a little bit made all your fears go away.
“Yeah, that I do”
Your cheeks turned red whenever you reminisced about that moment - or any moment that you spent with Ashton for that matter - which gave you the perfect idea for a song.
“I don’t want to kill my time with somebody else…” You hummed to yourself as you wrote down what you think is the chorus to a new song.
You told Ashton that you were not the type to write silly love songs or very uplifting songs; but there was something in that memory, something in that feeling that you couldn't ignore or just let it be without doing something about it. So, you started to write it.
You couldn't separate the feeling from the art, after all, feelings were what led you to dedicate your life to music. People would say it was because of your parent’s influence but they had little to nothing to do with your decision. This was you, the authentical you writing whatever came to mind and then sharing it with the world and only a few people will get it in its entirety. And surely Ashton was one of them.
“Dadadada something, want you all to myself”
“Wacha doing there, princess?”
Speaking of the devil.
Ashton smiled at you as he hunched over the table you were working on, trying to peek at what you were writing. You lifted the notebook and pressed it against your chest faking offense as he giggled.
“Didn’t your mother taught you not to sneak up on people, darling?” You asked as he walked around your workspace and sat himself down on the chair next to you “Besides, you’re late. You were supposed to meet me here like half an hour ago!”
“Aww, sorry Sixx” Ashton pouted “But there were no chocolate chip cookies left in the shop so I had to go around town to get you some” He then put a bag of freshly made cookies on top of the table with a cup filled with coffee.
“You didn’t have to do that, you know?”
“Of course I did! You always only eat chocolate chips cookies in the afternoon”
He started to giggle again, ignoring the way you were looking at him “How did you know that?”
“C’mon, Y/N/N, every time we go for coffee you order two, one for the coffee and another one for the road. And every time we cater something you never touch anything but those cookies”
“I never knew you were so observant”
Ashton shrugged “I just pay attention if I like what I see,” He said nonchalantly with a wink, making you blush instantly, but you covered it up with an eye roll.
“God, you’re terrible” You scoffed.
“I’m honest!” You shook your head and went back to writing, but Ashton was not going to let that go so easily. “Look, how else could I know that you always put an extra bag of sugar in your coffee?”
“‘Cause I always drink the same thing,” You said without looking up from your notebook.
“Yeah, a mocha latte with extra chocolate drizzle and no foam. Honestly, how can you handle that much sugar?” You were about to answer but he caught you off. “But that’s not all you drink, whenever you have a bad day you always order a cup of mango and ginger tea because that’s your mother’s favorite drink and it helps you calm down. You also don’t want anyone to know that you’re having a bad day but the minute someone looks away your smile starts to flatter until you’re back in the conversation”
You stopped the writing completely as you turned to him, suddenly feeling how your heart started to jump all over your chest as he kept talking, eyes never leaving yours as he gave you a soft smile, almost as if he was remembering all those moments with you.
“You draw flowers on the corner of your notebooks whenever you feel bored. You love the sad songs on the radio and you know every single word to Lorde’s Melodrama, yet every time you have to choose a playlist you put 2000’s pop and R&B songs because it hypes you up. You hate awkward silences unless you are the one being quiet. You help Dylan dye his hair every time he asks you to because you would trust each other with your lives, you give Cole relationship advice because you care about him and he always appreciates your advice more than anyone’s and Braeden is your best friend because you always say that he is one of the few people that could make you laugh in a bad day and you have no idea how much I want to be included in that list”
“Ashton-”
“You write better with dim light, it helps you concentrate on your work. You say you don’t believe in astrology yet you check your horoscope every day. You want to make sure that everyone has a good time and feels included, that’s why you always make conversations with Micahel about games you never even heard before or let Luke braid your hair when he’s bored or how you switched topics when you noticed that Calum was not engaging as much in a conversation. You literally take care of everyone but you never let anyone take care of you, and when we do you get all shy and you blush as you say thank you and you have no idea how fucking adorable you look”
You sat there speechless as he spoke. You felt the back of your throat dry as you tried to find the right words to answer all of that.
It was too much. The fact that he knew all of that and how he said it like he was just talking about his favorite things in the world, it was just too much but at the same time, you want to hear him say that again.
A weird sense of joy and shyness came over you as he set his hazel eyes on yours. You gave him a small smile as you averted your gaze to the floor.
“Wow, I-” You started “I never thought someone noticed all that”
“How could I not?” You heard him say “You’re all I can think about and to say that I don’t notice you is like saying I don’t notice the sun in the sky or the stars at night. You’re the brightest light out there, Y/N, you shine everywhere you go”
You noticed how he pulled his chair closer to you and suddenly you felt how your chair started to slowly turn his way until you were face to face.
Ashton carefully placed his fingers under your chin and tilted your head until you were finally looking into his eyes again.
“There she is!” He smiled when he noticed your blushing cheeks and gleaming eyes.
“What do you mean when you say I’m all you think about?” You asked expectantly, curling your fingers nervously on top of your thighs.
Ashton chuckled. “Well, if you didn’t notice, I really fucking like you, Y/N”
You looked up at him, smiling with hopeful eyes and feeling as if a weight was lifted off your chest thanks to the joy you were experiencing while hearing those words.
“You do?”
“Unless you don’t like me back and I just spilled my feelings for nothing-” You smacked him playfully in the arm “Ouch! I’m kidding! Of course I like you! Fuck, Y/N I’ve been falling for years now and I thought I was being pretty obvious”
You laughed “I thought you were just playing!”
In an instant, Ashton pulled your chair closer and grabbed you by the hip, lifting you up and making you sit on his lap as he hugged you by the waist and you placed your arms around his neck.
“I’ve never been more serious in my life,” He said, “I’ll do anything to prove it”
“Well,” You said, pressing a kiss to his cheek and knocking your forehead to his “How about you help me finish this song and then you take me on a date? Cause I’ve been falling for you, too and I don’t want to waste any more time”
Ashton hummed as he nuzzled his nose against your cheek, kissing it softly as he murmured “Will I get to kiss my princess at midnight?”
“Maybe… or you can take your chances now if you’d like”
He smiled.
“I like those odds”
And just before you know it, he softly pressed his lips against yours; finally creating a happy beginning for the two of you.
Instagram Posts
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tags: @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @mystic-232 @talksoprettyjjx @theshyspy @hoodhoran @flaneurcth @notinthesameguey @bubblegum18 @irwin-fletcher-ash @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @1980holland @wiiildflowerrr @hoplessromantic727 @fivesecondsofonedirection @another-lonely-heart @aabc5sauce @dudethisiswhyyoudonthavefriends @major5sosstan @5sos-imagine @SunflowerAngel2123 @perfectnouis @in-superbloom @lukeisstillapenguin @sadcupofcoffee @superstarmarvel @personalmuyverypersonal @ashtonsunflower @nicebasscalum @calumspupils @secretsicanthideanymore @the-ghost-of-luke @alltimesos @girlwhosimps @wontlastimokwiththat @ttinahood @lukespitinmymouth @perfectnouis
#ashton irwin#5 seconds of summer#5sos#ashton irwin fluff#ashton irwin imagine#ashton irwin fanfiction#ashton irwin fic#suchalonelysunflower#5sos ashton#ashton 5 seconds of summer#5sos fanfiction#5sos writing#5sos fic#5 seconds of summer fic#5 seconds of summer fanfiction#5 seconds of summer ashton#ashton fletcher irwin#wallows#wallows! reader#ashton x reader#ashton x you#fanfic#ashton fic#luke hemmings#calum hood#michael clifford
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I wonder: if I showed this simple (and definitely incomplete) list of things Jikook did with each other to some outsider... would they think they are a couple or not?
(-> YES. YES THEY WOULD. The fact that people have the gut to discredit them because they are same sex members of a boy group blows my mind! The overly pushed heteronormative is especially disgusting :/)
JM is JK 's emergency contact
JK has JM initials tattoed on his ring finger
they know e/o's family very well JK's mom loves JM JK references JM's father multiple times JK's brother seem to like JM a lot
JM gave JK a '(love)bite' on his neck
JK nibbled on JM's ear on a stage in front of 66k people after saying 'I love you'
JK called JM baby
JK called JM dangshin
JM called JK puppy prince
JK drops honorifics with JM
you are me I am you
they where together on free days/national holidays
they are often seen arriving and leaving together in the same car
JK said JM is the perfect person to marry
JK always gives JM his full attention when JM is talking
JK said JM is the member who gave him the most confort
they went to see the first snow together
they wore matching outfits on valentine's day
they went on a private holiday together (JK's present to JM for his birthday)
JK recorded their holiday together and published the video as his last present to JM (said video has romantic undertones and lyrics)
JK has preferential treatment for JM - pancake - never getting angry and letting JM get away with anything - scolding the other members when they talk over JM
they have special voices/tones for e/o
they share or match clothes jeans shirts green jackets vampire t-shirt olive brewery sweater grey t-shirt pants/shirt by LV check collection olive green and balck plaid jacket purple shirt and purple marni sweater shoes on several occasions
they went on a date to disneyland
they went on a date bowling
they went on a date ice skating
they touch in sus places neck (both) inner thighs (both) waist (JK to JM) chest (JM to JK) hair/face/lips (both) ass (both)
they hold hands for no reason
they back-hug for no reason
they side-hug for no reason
they hug for no reason
they sit on top of e/o
JK gravitates towards JM
JK stares at JM a lot esp his lips
they cuddle
JM said he would go to the moon with JK
JM said he would feel safe with JK even on a deserted island
JM said JK is a reliable banreyo
JK said everything about JM is cute
JK said JM is the cutest
JK said JM with makeup is sexy
JK said 'if it's sexy, it's JM hyung'
JM said he loves waking up and seeing JK
JK portraied his and JM morning routine in the music video for LGO bc he wanted realism
JM said the part of his heart that thinks about JK is quite big
JK woke up early on a 'retreat' in New Zeland to collect snow and gift it to JM
JK said JM's existence is honey for him
they have been seen going shopping together
they have been seen working out together
they have given e/o plenty of compliments (even on their phisical appearence)
the thing JK is most sorry for is an argument with JM when they were younger
jin repeatedly teased them for their couply behavior
they flirt on stage magic shop
they naturally pair up for group pictures
they wait for e/o to head home
they give e/o advice on dancing, performance and singing
they are together at weird hours at night (night buddies coff coff)
V called them out several time for being together alone instead of with him (vlives)
they said they better not do vlives together bc they distract e/o
the members refers to them as a unit
staff has said they never see them separated
they have questionable selcas together (of buised lips and shared beds)
JK said JM is shameless
they flirt a lot during downtime
JM seems to like being picked up/carried around by JK
JM said JK is his happy virus
JK said he makes JM happy. JM didn't deny
rabbit spit
JM saying JK likes being tied up
allusive pick up lines everywhere my heart is burning why are you acting cute detective play with me arrest me do you think you can always be forgiven bc you are cute it's not our first time I want you why do you always come to my room give me a kiss why am I so erotic? I am going to be your future boyfriend are you happy bc of me? Don't you hear my heartbeat? I purple u do you like me that much? This is my toy JK's holy sweat You gotta spank him although he's older
questionable subtitles provided for context star, wind and romance mood and they lived happily ever after JK is happy with JM kate minslet and leonardo jungcaprio JM is JK's favourite model the director is getting into it JM and JK are one the maknae is happy thanks to JM hearts, cute comments and music from the editing team over their interactions
the sun and moon duo
golden closet film
big romantic gestures for e/o JM getting back to korea from Paris for JK's birthday JK singing romantic songs to JM
korea's open secret
being seen together taking a covid swab
JM always stays afterhours to reharse with JK
they are e/o biggest fanboys
JK is protective of JM (airport)
jimmeo and kookliet
JM got annoyed Jin called him while he was spending time with JK
they went on a boat date to see the red moon
they went to see malta together
JK is often potographing or filming JM
they have moments together that are proper misteries and so weird the mosquito net incident the whole osaka vlives fiasco the various 'home' references laguna beach the kiss sound video while JK reharses weird tweets/hashtags what do you want for your birthday, do you have a desire? Ambiguous use of the world ARMY what is tasty in Busan JM's manager the tissue incident the incriminated-selfie gate
they seem to know everything about e/o
they mention e/o a lot
their last two solo songs are love songs (finding love in unexpected places and the joy coming from happy love)
j-hope mixes them up a lot
JM has plenty of cute pet names for JK
JM said 'it could appear as if JK is simply somebody close to him who is younger (but...)'
JM is always with JK when he is phisically or emotionally hurt
JK often massages JM for his chronic pain
JM often massages/caresses JK bc yes
JK imitated JM's dangerous dieting in order to make him realize how bad it was
they have private (questionable) videos dancing together/practicing alone
JK took over a call JM did to Jin on vlive to say 'I love you'
JK said 'I love you JM' in the mic after a concert
JK said 'I love you' to JM on the red carpet in sign language
They both said they get hyped when they make eye contact on stage
JK gave JM the cutie award
JK stays close to JM when JM falls asleep in public places
they blew kisses to e/o
they got lost staring at e/o and forgot what they where doing JM on the red carpet both of them at awards
they paired accessories
they paired hair colors
they have a lot of admiration for e/o as people
JK lets (or makes) JM win
they get frequently lost in their own world
they reference things only the other understand
JK sometimes puts up a bit of a jealous act I do not approve of this
JM lets JK scold him
JK said to JM 'you are always number one for me'
JK said to JM 'I am always watching you'
JK has been recorded softly containing JM when he's on a perfectionist streak
they seek e/o out for comfort after performance hugging/hand holding
when one is hurt the other looks like he's suffering too JK on stage when JM broke down in the first virtual concert JM when JM got denied in a game
they defend e/o from the other members and have e/o's back
the other members separated them on several occasions when they got too touchy
personal space who?
They know things about e/o that are clearly not shared with the class brushing teeths snoring alarm ring sleeping time
black swan performance
they put e/o hands under the other's clothes to touch bare skin
JM kissed JK's neck
they feed e/o
spanking and ass-grabbing
they were caught on camera ogling e/o shamlessly
JM's weird strenght kink
JM said his camera roll is full ok JK
they have a different smile for e/o
other members said suspicious things about them together
JK only saw JM and J-hope during their official break
all the members minus JM complain about JK not answering his phone
heart eyes
drinking from the same bottle
blindly recognizing e/o's body parts just by touch or out of context photos
napping on each other (yeah, you read that right)
non-verbal communication over 9000
weird editorial cuts in backstage videos when the two of them are together
JM said 'JK falls asleep hugging me'
JM said 'JK plays hard to get but when he thinks I am sleeping he comes by and say I love you'
JM said he is the main model for GCF
JK said JM's photocard is sexy
JK sometimes hesitates in touching JM or holding him when he knows they r on camera
JK said JM is a fallen angel
JK praised JM's dancing several times
JK likes to tease JM
fixing e/o clothes
JK closes his eyes when JM touches him
JM run trough a whole stage abandoning his stage persona when he hought JK was being sick
JM puts JK's happiness first
similar mindset about important stuff in life
JM sat on JK. Uh. Different ways
JK putting his hands over JM while being hugged in order to drag JM even closer
JM ordering JK around and literally dragging him around
JK being overprotective
the members subtly panicking when JK/JM have to interact closely on camera
JM having to fight for JK's forgiveness while Jin was immediately let off the hook
Quite a list anon, lol. You put so much work into this list I couldn't not post it.
I do agree with most of your points if not all of them, but a good example of just how much there is out there to show how these two are the real deal.
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Magic
Excerpt from a new Jily seventh-year one-shot that has ballooned dramatically, to the surprise of no one. There's more to come!
As January slips by, days pass without a kiss at minimum, although they’re few and far between. On the other hand, they don’t waste a single day without some form of verbal interaction—laughter in between classes, or banter at mealtimes, or bickering at prefect meetings that almost always serves as a precursor to snogging. Increasingly, new activities join these pastimes that have somehow become cherished. Lily grows closer to his friends, and James makes quick inroads with hers, although sometimes her mates look a little too flattered by his attention for her liking. He requests her help in Potions, and they spend long hours together in the dungeons accomplishing more than just snogging, although that comes with the territory as well. In turn, he insists on aiding her in Transfiguration after Sirius offers continued help, and the way Sirius winks at her when James turns his back has her convinced that he’s pleased for reasons beyond escaping the extra work of tutoring her. Truly, Sirius surprises her more and more as the days melt by, because he easily detaches himself from James’ side to allow for the quiet, private conversations that begin to happen organically between them in the common room, and he even distracts her friends so it can happen. None of her friends complain about this new arrangement that secures Sirius’ attention, but Marlene seems perhaps the happiest of all.
She and James have talked before these conversations, of course. They’ve been housemates for years, after all, and he’s never shied away from paying her attention that she typically hasn’t wanted. Yet most of that attention has erred on the side of either endless banter or endless bickering, and the quiet, fireside chats that happen with more and more regularity feel worlds apart from either of those things. Sure, they still laugh and they still argue, although the laughs are quieter, and more smiles than harsh words accompany the arguments. He watches her plait her hair or rub her neck while they talk, his eyes soft as they discuss their respective career aspirations, and trade gossip about fellow students, and whisper secrets about their friends, and recount memories of the past and hopes for the future. He tells her about his brilliant potioneer father and brilliant herbologist mother, and she can almost picture them as he talks, his father’s spectacles and messy hair and his mother’s rigid posture and kind face. In turn, he asks probing questions about her own family, until she reveals bit by bit about her jolly, constantly-teasing dad and loving caretaker of a mum. Eventually, she even tells him about Petunia too, although it comes even more difficultly than any mention of her parents.
“I didn’t even know you had a sister,” he says one particularly chilly night as wind whips past the common room windows. She feels her shoulders shift outside of her control, and he catches the subtle change. He always does. “What?”
She’s trying, just like she’d promised Marlene, and it doesn’t come easily. “I’m sure her friends have said that to her about me.”
He takes that in for a moment. “Maybe,” he says eventually. “She’d be stupid not to claim you, though. Besides—” It sounds like he’s carefully counting each word. “Family isn’t about blood. It’s a choice. I mean, look at Sirius.”
He means it metaphorically, not literally, but they both look towards where Sirius lounges nearby, laughing with his friends and hers. It’s late, and particularly late for a weekday, so Sirius’ laughter sounds especially loud in the near-empty common room. Watching him throw his head back in amusement, it’s nearly impossible not to smile with him, and James does.
She doesn’t. If anything, Sirius’ laughter triggers something even sadder inside her, and for reasons she doesn’t fully understand, not at first. “It’s not fair,” she says quietly, words spoken without thought, and it all clicks together abruptly, like a radio station suddenly in tune. Her throat burns, and she clears it as she looks towards the fire. “Sorry. Sorry, I—” Her explanation falters and then dies in her mouth. There are probably words express it all—the sudden clarity in Sirius’ constant gregarious nature that he uses to win people over like his life depends upon it, her own people-pleasing ways, the ease of their bond that she’s never understood before—but trying to find them hurts too much to even contemplate past a couple of painful seconds.
James reaches for her hand, which has clenched into a fist atop her lap. Somehow, the slow stroke of his fingers eases the tension that has turned her knuckles white. Her hand opens, and his thumb caresses each of her knuckles as color returns. “Save your apologies for the next time you piss me off,” he says, and he turns her hand over in her lap.
She watches as he presses their palms together, his fingers dwarfing hers, and her mouth smiles before she catches herself at it. “It seems like I’ve been pissing you off less lately.”
He returns her smile, his fingers lacing through hers in a brief, warm squeeze. “It’s hard to get mad at you when you’re getting me off all the time.” Something shifts in his voice, something that squeezes her insides.
“Same, but don’t take that as a challenge to piss me off.”
He chuckles softly. “You know me too well. Well, I’m glad we finally figured out how to get you to tolerate me.”
His hand remains locked in hers, his thumb once again slowly brushing over her knuckles. She’s not sure which is more difficult to look at: their hands, fitted so neatly together, or his face, which radiates more warmth than even moments before. “Tolerate,” she repeats, skeptical. That hardly sums up the things he does to her body—and to her mind, and, increasingly, to her heart—on a regular basis. “The same goes for you.”
“Evans.” Her name comes out chidingly, and he waits until she looks at him before he goes on. “I don’t just tolerate you. And I’d—” He takes in a deep breath, eyes flickering back and forth between each of hers. “Your sister is stupid,” he says again, but it sounds entirely different somehow. “Anyone would be lucky to claim you. I told you—you’re magic.”
It’s not the first time he’s declared as much to her since the train, but it’s the first time that it sounds like something other than heated talk spoken against her mouth or skin. For the first time, she catches a glimmer of what he means—or a glimmer of what it means to her, at least, since she has no way of knowing if he feels the same. Something stretches between them, a moment that’s brief but heavy and undeniable, and she wants to look away, but she can’t. She’s suspended in time, held entirely in place on the other side of his gaze.
It’s magic, what holds her there, a magic unlike any she’s ever discovered.
“Thank you.” Her voice comes out soft and a little small. She sounds nothing like herself.
He doesn’t call her on it. He moves closer to her, shifting towards the edge of his armchair until their knees touch, and his other hand joins where he’s still holding hers atop her lap. “I’m rather good at palm reading, you know,” he says, and the magic between them snaps as the fireplace crackles, and so abruptly that she jumps a little. Before she can blink, things settle back into familiar patterns, from the lazy smile on his face to the teasing in his tone to her own immediate banter in return.
“Don’t insult my intelligence. You dropped out of Divination fourth year. I haven’t forgotten.”
“Flattered you remember my movements so closely.” He releases her hand so he can pull it into his own lap, and he traces a fingertip along her palm, drama exuding from every pore. “If you’re too scared to know your future—worried who might be in it, maybe—”
“Go on, then.”
The future—as told by James—holds things she expects and things that she doesn’t.
She expects him to predict a long life. She expects him to predict a continued close relationship with her friends. She expects him to predict a prosperous career in brewing, because she’s confided those dreams in him. He tells her all of those things as he tickles her palm with twisting caresses.
Yet she doesn’t expect his long description of her handsome future husband, a man who will allegedly propose many times before she’ll finally accept. She also doesn’t expect his recounting of all the children she’ll have, enough for an entire Quidditch team.
She’s laughing by the end, and he’s laughing with her. “That’s too many kids,” she says. “I’m not doing that to my body, and I can’t imagine that this wonderful husband of mine—”
“He’s handsome too, don’t forget.”
“Right. I can’t imagine that this wonderful, handsome husband of mine will expect it of me.” She wiggles her fingers. “Look again, will you?”
He obliges with all the seriousness of a seer, and his hair falls in front of his face as he bends in concentration. “Maybe not quite that many, but at least two, maybe three. It’s a lonely existence, being an only child. Your husband, he’ll feel pretty strongly about that.”
Thank god he’s looking at her hand. Thank god he’s looking at her hand and not her face, because—
All banter and faux predictions aside, she’s tempted to start practicing for those babies with him right then and there.
Accidentally or on purpose, she’s falling in love with him, and it’s all his fault.
#jily#jilyfic#james potter#lily evans#marauders#marauders fanfiction#scriibble has no chill#and needs to stfu up and finish EA#but inspiration is a fickle beast
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Remember Me (Becca x MC) Part 2
Hiii I’m back. Sorry again for the delay 😬I had such a hard time writing the ending so thank you so much @samanthadalton for all your help 😘Also, a big thanks to M anon for their suggestions and song request which I used some of.
tag list: @samanthadalton @crazzyplays @uselesslesbianfr @baexpoppy @alexroyard @alexlabhont @veenast @noixngn @sillyandcutewizardstuffs @doey-eyes8 @itszdavenport (If you wanna be added or removed or just prefer a certain ship just let me know ❤️)
Read Part 1
Pairing: Becca x MC (Emily)
Warnings: some swearing
Word Count: 2289
It's been an hour since Emily last came into my room to remind me of my doctor's appointment. And it's been about thirty minutes since I've been ready to go, physically at least. Naturally, I tried to get Chris to come with me instead because he's my boyfriend, right? Ughh fine, ex-boyfriend. But can you blame me, though? How am I suppose to move on when I literally have no memory of some sort of breakup or closure? I stare at the dull beige-colored ceiling, a view which has me panicking in the mornings right after I wake up, before I remember that I don't live at the sorority house anymore. I then close my eyes and get comfort in the memories I have left, my only anchor on the reality I knew, away from this freakish place with the people I don't even give a shit about.
After a couple more minutes, I begrudgingly get up with a groan and trudge downstairs, finding Emily waiting on the couch. She smiles upon seeing me, but I don't return the gesture, being genuinely annoyed at the prospect of having to spend an incessant amount of time with her. So instead, I walk past her towards the door, my heels clattering on the wooden surface. Emily then follows behind me from a distance, careful not to invade my space. Once outside, I walk straight towards the passenger door of Emily's junk of a car, grabbing the handle as I glare at Emily impatiently, waiting for her to unlock it. As soon as unlocked, I sink into the seat, slamming the door close harder than I intended. Emily, though, takes a second before going in, eyeing the seat suspiciously as if it might shatter anytime. Once seated, she places her hand on the gear stick, slightly trembling. And then it dawns on me, I may have forgotten about the accident, but it's probably still fresh from her memory, terrorizing her at every reminder. All this time, I've been complaining about how unfair everything is for me, not once considering how it may have affected her.
"Who was driving?" I ask. It may not be the best thing to talk about right now, but I have to know.
I see Emily flinch at the question, and before she even opens her mouth, I know. She looks out the windshield, her voice cracking when she replies, "I was."
I nod. My mom told me it was a drunk driver running a red light that hit us, so I don't blame her at all, not anymore.
"Is it–" The words come out sharp, so I stop and soften my voice. "Is it the first time you drove since?"
Emily doesn't reply immediately; instead, she shifts the gear and steps on the gas pedal as we begin to make our way towards the hospital. She grips the steering wheel tightly, anxiously looking at the road, her eyes obsessively sweeping for any oncoming traffic at every intersection.
"No. No it's not but..." Emily trails off, her knuckles turning white as her grip on the steering wheel tightens.
But it's her first time to drive with me in the car. I turn my head to look out the window, knowing full well I can't ease her fears. How can I when I'm the living reminder of everything she lost?
---------
I immediately regret my outfit choice as soon as we get into the waiting room, the frigid temperature biting at my skin, sending sharp pains like that of a needle across my exposed skin. I try to play it cool, but a shiver escapes my body, desperate for any source of heat. A few seconds later, a jacket appears in front of me, held by Emily who is wearing an annoyingly cute little smile on her face. I mumble thanks and take the jacket, placing it over my shoulders, smelling the scent of lavender as I bask in the comfort of heat.
I take out my phone and browse my socials, catching up on all the events I missed–or forgotten–while ignoring the get well soon messages from both people I know and don't know that have been piling up ever since the accident. A few minutes later, the doctor calls my name, and as I stand up, Emily does as well but then sits back down almost immediately, clearly unsure if her company is welcome.
I roll my eyes. "Come on."
---------
After a useless consultation–apparently, they can't do much to help me regain my memories–Emily suggests we stop by an ice cream parlor not far from here. I assent, but only because I need the comfort of a sugary snack right now, and it's been ages since I had one, or at least I think so.
We reach a store I don't recognize, replacing an office space that, while I never paid attention to before, was a pleasant fixture in my reality, not this... eyesore. I shake my head; I can't keep living in the past. I follow Emily into the store, reminding myself that this is my reality now.
Inside, the floor is patterned with alternating pink and black tiles, and the walls are coated with somewhat fresh pink paint adorned with decors that scream ice cream as if one might stumble into the shop looking for lunch or something.
"Welcome t–ah Emily and Becca! I haven't seen you girls in a while."
I turn around to see a guy, probably in his mid-twenties– smiling at us like... I shoot Emily a side-eye. She, of course, fails to mention that the guy working here is buddy-buddy with me. So, is this the kind of couple we were? Those who frequent an ice cream parlor enough to be on a first-name basis with the ice cream guy? I internally groan in disgust at the thought.
"–Becca." I'm pulled out of my thoughts when I hear my name. Emily and the ice cream guy are looking at me expectantly.
"Sorry I didn't hear," I mumble.
"You'll be having strawberry, your usual, correct?" says the guy with a wide smile.
I do want strawberry, but I shake my head and say, "Vanilla," just to spite him, annoyed how some stranger knows my favorite ice cream flavor.
"Ooh, trying something new today, are we? One rocky road and vanilla coming right up," he announces in an annoyingly high pitch voice. I struggle not to roll my eyes.
"Where's the bathroom?" I ask, which is met by a look of confusion followed by a laugh.
"You know wh–"
Emily quickly interjects, "The bathroom's there, Becca," pointing at a door at the back of the store.
I excuse myself and go to the bathroom, heading straight towards the mirror. I stare at my reflection, nitpicking every tiny detail that has changed throughout the years, changes I don't recognize at all. A tear rolls down my cheek, but I quickly wipe it away. I'm Rebecca fucking Davenport; I don't cry. I grip the sink tightly, overcome with a new resolution. I know who I am; they don't, convincing myself more than anyone else.
Once finishing up in the bathroom, I head back outside, noticing a different aura in the room. Emily is holding our orders with an apologetic look while the ice cream guy regards me with pity, something I've grown used to in the past few weeks. I take my ice cream from Emily, not meeting her gaze, and walk out of the store, striding ahead of her towards the car, not once looking back.
--------
On the ride home, silence weighs heavily between us as Emily bites at her lower lip, either contemplating what to say or waiting for me to go off on her. After an awkward amount of time, Emily finally breaks the silence.
"I'm sorry I–"
"Forget about it," I cut her off, too exhausted to engage with her. I think about the previous encounter, wondering if that would be my norm. Unfamiliar people coming up to me, sharing inside jokes and anecdotes while I stare blankly at them, wondering if I should explain my situation or just ignore them, being the bitch I know I am. I stare out the window, seeing all the changes in the city, musing about the memories I may have had alongside them, memories that I may or may not recover. It's as if an impostor had been living my life for the past two years, and now I'm forced to follow in their footsteps. It's obvious I had changed a lot during those years, my previous enemies becoming my closest friends, my greatest rival supposedly becoming the love of my life. Was she the love of my life? Was I happy with Emily?
It's already dark outside when we arrive home. I notice a few cars parked down the road, something unusual considering this is the only house for at least a couple of blocks. What do I know, though, it's not like I remember much about this place. I turn my attention back to the house; the lights inside are turned off, leaving a lone street lamp and the car's headlights as the primary sources of light, accentuating the jagged grey bricks of the house, almost giving an appearance of something sinister. This is ridiculous; I chide myself for being scared of a stupid house.
Emily walks ahead towards the door while I follow a few steps behind. As soon as I walk inside, the light turns on, and I'm greeted by a chorus of surprise echoing throughout the house, coming from people whom I only recognize half of. I stare at them blankly, unimpressed but just mostly confused. My mother walks over to me and gives me a big hug.
"Happy birthday, sweetie."
Birthday? I inconspicuously look at my phone. Huh. I could've sworn I've seen the date today at least a few times. A few moments later, Emily steps forward with a cake in her hands.
"Happy birthday babe," she says, immediately followed by a look of horror. "Becca. Sorry."
Of course Emily had planned this. It doesn't really matter if I wanted to have a stupid party. She had to go ahead and decide for me.
"Go ahead and blow out the candles," my mom urges.
I blow out the candles, faking a smile for my mom. As much as I want to storm into my room, I'm not about to break my mom's heart by causing some unnecessary drama.
--------
Just a few moments into the party, and I'm already exhausted–people lining up to greet me, asking how I've been doing since the accident. I realize that most people here don't know about my condition, which means I have had to engage in quite a few conversations about the things I've supposedly been doing for the past few years, things I have no recollection of, to which I gave vague answers to avoid having to explain everything.
I down my fourth glass of virgin cuba libre, eyeing the display of alcohol with contempt, resentful that I can’t drink because of the medicine I took earlier, when Zack drags me across the room to play some truth or dare with a bunch of people, some of whom I don't recognize. Thankfully, if there was one thing the sorority has taught me, it's that you don't have to know someone to ask the right questions or expertly avoid the common ones. That is of course until someone asks you the most unexpected question.
"Do you have a date for the wedding yet?"
I stare at them blankly, fumbling for words. Wedding?
"I–I–"
But before I can make up an answer, Kaitlyn arrives with Emily in tow, and that's when I notice it, the ring on Emily's finger. I gasp for breath, feeling like the air is taken out of my lungs. And I almost don't notice it when Kaitlyn takes out her guitar and starts singing, joined by the others.
When all the tears are rolling down your face And it feels like yours was the only heart to break When you come back home and all the lights are out And you're getting used to no one else being around
Oh, oh, I'll be there
I look at the unfamiliar faces, singing their hearts out, gazing at me fondly. I then turn my gaze to Emily's ring finger, and sitting on it is a small but glistening diamond and part of me chastises myself for not noticing earlier. I feel the entire room’s eyes on me and suddenly, it becomes too much for me to withstand. I stand up, scrabbling to go to my room, footsteps following behind me. Once I got on the stairs, Emily shouts my name from behind, and I stop at the sound of her voice, turning around.
"We were engaged? Why didn't you tell me?" My voice comes out harsher than expected and it seems to take Emily by surprise too because she just stands there motionless, speechless. “Marriage is a big thing Emily, that’s not something you can just conveniently not tell me.” I let out a frustrated groan, momentarily letting the anger wash all over me before I’m left with a bitter feeling in the pit of my stomach. “I’m sick of having random people tell me things about my life which I can’t even remember when my own fianc–” I stop, not even being able to say the word, shaking my head as the agony brought by my predicament proves to be too much. “I can’t do this. I'm sorry," I croak before running towards my room, slamming the door behind me. I then curl myself in bed as the tears fall freely.
#becca#becca davenport#becca x mc#the freshman series#playchoices#my work#my writing#my fanfics#request
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