#sorry anon I got really rambly
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if you're up to elaborating, i would love to hear more about your complicated feelings on Taliesin's reads of this campaign, because that's something that's been itching my brain but I'd been having a hard time pinpointing why and I'm interested to hear your thoughts!
So I think it's best summarized in part as a combination of what was said in this post I just reblogged and these tags from @kerosene-in-a-blender on this post:
#yeeeaaaahhhh#ngl it seems like the characters and parts of the cast got so caught up in the potential moral dilemma of interventionist gods#that they forgot the gods of exandria aren't particularly interventionist#critical role#critical role spoilers#cr spoilers
Ashton feels like they learned something about their own arrogance and assumptions with Shardgate...and then it just vanished. And the fact that Taliesin genuinely read that as what was supposed to happen when like 3-4 authority figures, some of whom (Allura) have existed since Campaign 1 as People To Listen To had said "This is a bad idea" in plain language does give me pause because like...with all due respect, I get why Ashton would do this anyway! But come on, man, how do you hear that and not go "oh maybe it's a bad idea."
I don't want to read in too much to cooldown and 4SD either but I really do just feel that like...some of the cast, and Taliesin isn't alone in this but definitely seems to be using it the most in-game, have come under the impression that the purpose of this campaign is specifically to upend everything we knew...but that idea is just an assumption that is not supported, and as I've said repeatedly, there is no situation in which the world is not drastically changed - there's going to be either a hostile alien invasion, or a friendly alien migration, but either one will be monumental within Exandrian history, and that's not counting the establishment of the Accord/the collapse of local institutions in both the Dwendalian Empire and Bassuras/ If one cannot see any possibility for vast change within the world other than killing/driving out the gods, I don't know how to address this nicely. This is an uncreative and stupid position that I can't engage with because it's so stupid. It's like saying World War II didn't change anything in our world because at the end of it the US and USSR both still existed largely intact. So the over-focus on only one means of change in a way that feels based on an interpretation of this campaign's purpose that isn't even stated anywhere is telling and deeply frustrating.
As the second post indicates, it feels like some of the cast, Taliesin especially, got caught up in a theological argument of divine intervention that personally I had a great time debating in Hebrew school when I was 13, but is not ultimately true in Exandria (or reality, for that matter). On some level it's like maybe read some Harold Kushner and you'll calm down; it feels like you're arguing against like, some very real religious tenets (that are not exclusively Christian for once) but in a story where that's not actually a problem.
I'd throw in that Bells Hells sit in this awkward place of not being nobodies (or Nobodies) anymore but many are still acting like it and Ashton is at the forefront. Indeed, look at the name "the Nobodies." The problem is that Ashton is a Somebody now. He's not like, the ruler of a city, or an ancient dragon, or a god. But they're someone who has the personal raw power and the connections to survive an ill-considered second shard absorption. They're someone who is easily going to survive a fall out of a window, and who can't be bound into service. They are someone who has been entrusted by the world to assist in saving it, and they're too fixated on the gods not personally saving them to consider the vast potential harm to others, and I think it's not inherently out of callousness but rather that they've rather abruptly risen from "orphan criminal who expected to be dead by 30" to "guy tasked to save the world" but they have no option but to rise to the occasion, as the Raven Queen said. To change the world, he must change himself, and I feel like Taliesin, who often enjoys the idea of characters who don't change, is perhaps too wed to that concept for this particular narrative. And, for what it's worth: I've said it before that my personal preference is to keep the gods in place...but I would genuinely be MILES happier with a party that decisively had decided to kill the gods. I would not agree with their decision, but anything is better than this indecision. And since Ashton is pretty staunchly in favor of killing the gods and the rest of the party is varying degrees of strongly against (Orym, Braius), weakly against (Chetney, Fearne, Imogen, increasingly Laudna) and unsure but worried specifically about the mortal impact (Dorian) at some point it's like. Either say "I don't like this, but this is the party's plan" or leave. The decisiveness matters on an individual level too; because Bells Hells does not have good internal methods of resolving conflict for reasons stated above and below, at some point it's like. You have to give it up because no one will make you. If Ashton genuinely cannot or will not yield on this, either commit to betraying the party (totally valid, could be a great story) or have them leave; if Ashton does trust the party, have them reluctantly give in. A party-wide choice must be made and fast. The party is aimless because they are all pulling in different directions and it all cancels out, but Ashton is definitely contributing extensively to that agonizing stasis.
I suppose I should wrap up with what I've been saying a lot but should probably go on this post which is that a lot of the flaws in this campaign are not any singular person's fault. I really do feel like they began with the fact that Matt was clearly building to this specific story, and Bells Hells were not a party terribly suited to it in the first place and then were given an earlier narrative that, because it was heavily on rails to get them to the solstice setpiece, failed to give them the tools to become people who would be prepared for this endgame. I think Matt really wanted the cast to make the decisions here, and did not have a specific decision in mind, and now they're all finding that they're playing characters who can't make that decision. It's a culmination of a lot of smaller out-of-game choices that have failed to gel into a coherent whole. When I say the Raven Queen was right, and if they are not ready for this, to go home, I don't think the party should be tpk-ed or anything, but yeah, if they can't decide what to do when they are essentially tasked with killing the BBEG and diffusing the universe-shattering bomb, they should abdicate. I don't think a story in which the heroes fail is a bad one. I know Call of the Netherdeep has been a touchstone in the fandom throughout this campaign and there's one possible ending to that that's sort of unsatisfying, but the unsatisfying nature itself makes it an interesting story to me. I think this campaign ending with the party saying "we can't do this" is vanishingly unlikely, and complaints aside I think they will probably make a decision now but it all feels exceedingly doylist - Bells Hells are the characters the cast happens to be playing for this climactic final moment so I guess they will play those characters, and those characters will have to make a choice so that the final moment happens, but it doesn't feel terribly organic.
#answered#Anonymous#it's been a minute since I read harold kushner i should get that out of the library if i can#unrelated but i bought the main actual play study text too my meta is going to get REALLY fucking researched soon#not that it wasn't. but it's going to get MORE.#this got very rambly and a bit off topic anon sorry i hope it still answers it#cr spoilers
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Going anon for this one because I was feeling embarrassed but I also gotta know-- How did you manage to leave the Mario fandom? You seemed really passionate about it, and your posts were some of the best I've seen and read. What made you able to stop and focus on other things? Asking because as a small writer I kinda wanna do the same but I fear losing the few followers I have, so I feel stuck.
Do you have any advice for me?
Hi. ☺️ Thanks for reaching out!
While I wouldn't say I entirely left the Mario fandom (as I still have a genuine fondness for the games and part of the lore), I did let go of it quite a bit as an artist and I appreciate that you sought my perspective on what is a rather complex and delicate issue. 🤲
Fanwork and involvement in itself can be really fun and quite harmless when done right, but there are three things that I believe should always be kept in mind when participating more actively:
1- You are not getting paid for what you do. A vast majority of creators online receive absolutely no compensation for their contribution, and those that do usually obtain it strictly through commissions. For the most part, it's hours of hard work spent creating and then sharing content for free. And while this isn't inherently problematic per say, it's important to never lose sight of what your efforts go into and in what way it benefits you (or not).
2- There are thousands upon thousands of communities out there, for nearly every subject imaginable. The one(s) you're currently focusing on may mean the world to you right now, but that could very well change tomorrow, or next year. My point being: it's nice to have a notable passion towards something, but I don't think we should let it reach a point where it takes up all the room and seeps into our every waking thought. Being open to discovering and learning about other things can be an eye-opening experience, and having different interests is very good for the mind.
3- Views and likes don't matter at the end of the day. They really, truly don't. They won't make a significant impact in your life nor bring anything substantial to the table. Essentially, it all circles back to why you're creating something and who you're making it for. Having followers can be very exciting and uplifting for sure... But it shouldn't be your sole motivation for staying in a fandom, because chances are this will make you very unhappy longterm. If you want to draw or write about something, please do it for yourself above all. It's the only lasting way you'll get a genuine sense of joy and gratification out of it, trust me.
As far as the online experience goes, I consider friends and enthusiastic exchanges about common interests to be THE ultimate purpose of any community. Not fanwork. Not the followers count. Only good vibes. And the greatest thing about this is, the close friends you make will stay with you no matter what you choose to focus on next, I can assure you that. 💫💙
#Sorry this got quite a bit longer than I initially intended ><#Hope this was useful to you in any way Anon! 🥺 Other than my burnout these three reminders were what helped me the most I think.#Good luck in sorting things out 👐#Being honest to ourselves is the first step and also the most important one#So I'm really glad that you're acknowledging this#Wishing you well 💐#Fanart and fanwork#Important#Creative freedom#Community#Thoughts and ramblings
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this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail
sorry got in character for a second
Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though
congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)
#im still not far into nemesis personally but im very much enjoying it#honestly in a weird way it feels like it's moving faster than HD did. which. is funny bc nemesis is like The gated behind item grinds quest#idk. HD was a fun slowburn where we adventured around gathering our rogues gallery before the action kicked in#nemesis on the other hand feels like im picking up halfway through a batman serial#fallen london#ask#it's WAY more fucked up right off the bat than HD was. honestly ive thought abt red honey for ages. that's so fucked up#and we LEAD with that?? Okay#definitely a horrors-filled ambition befitting caeru (the guy who's constantly going through horrors)#it really encourages you to get fucked up and freaky and in ur character's headspace at basically every step along the way#i only have HD to compare it too but HD was like. a lot more interpretative in comparison? at least to me. that's what it felt like#and i adore HD for that dont get me wrong here#HD just also waited until like. halfway through before it asked what the scoundrel actually Wanted out of its heart's desire#nemesis in comparison is right off the bat who died? who are you mourning? anguish. justice. there must be vengeance.#it's a delightfully different vibe!! i like it!!!#oh god sorry anon im doing the classic yin talking way too much in the tags thing again#i havent had much excuse to talk abt nemesis and what i think of it so far and of course its rp effects on caeru#but i do have a handful of thoughts on it#it's good. im liking it so far. it's starting very strong if nothing else. and i have no spoiler knowledge of what happens in the future#beyond the choice between rewards at the very end#and im SO curious how we'll get to that point. what horrors will we adventure through next? off we go to find out!#it's biggest glaring weakness so far is how horrendously grindy it is. and like. ive been warned and done my research ahead of time#im doing it on the same account im seeking. i knew what i was getting into. but also gots damn.#in comparison HD's 5-card lodgings and dreamgate feel like footnotes#anyway while im already way too deep into rambling did you know the honey trip gives you fate?? insane. why does it do that. hilarious even
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omggggg YES whether you look at eddie through a demi!gaze or just a queer!gaze, the difference between he and buck is sort of obvious? (to me)
it makes sense for them to say that bi!buck has been scattered throughout the show, we’ve seen and heard hints directed at/about several other male characters. so it’s logical it’s not entirely about eddie for him and therefore his bi!arc starts with someone else
eddie on the other hand hasn’t really had ‘moments’ with other male characters? a lot of his queer!spec comes from his history and the way he is with dating, but his main interactions with other male characters are the softer more domestic scenes with he and buck. 704 proved that eddie’s friendship with other men is completely different to how he is with buck. so in my head it’s logical that for him, it is about buck, and that’s where his queer!arc starts
Yeah, here's the thing, like Oliver pointed out, there are a lot of moments of Buck having flirty moments with men who are not Eddie in the show, even if it wasn't on purpose in the beginning, like, something Oliver was consciously told to portrait, Buck does have a bisexual energy to him from the get-go, and I think it is nice for him to be able to explore that outside the person we all know is the love of his life, yk? He needs to accept that he likes men before he accepts he loves Eddie. It's kinda like the way a lot of feeling realization fics from Buck's pov have Buck fine with the idea of wanting a family with Eddie but panicking when he realizes he wants to have sex with him, he needs to accept that, especially with the way he has a bad relationship with sex overall.
But, Eddie on the other hand, he doesn't have moments with men, he has moments with Buck, I think maybe if you push a little bit, you can say he was flirting with Judd in the crossover, but like, it's been Buck since the ridiculous sexual tension in the gym during under pressure. And, like, until the show tells me I'm wrong I will exist in my "Eddie is settled into his feelings because he thinks Buck can't feel the same" because you can absolutely make an argument for Eddie to be in the "it's not his fault he can't feel the same way about me" stage of falling with your "straight" best friend, I say straight because Eddie still doesn't know, I did write a whole thing on how you can recontextualize the show to make it seem like Eddie has been semi-aware of his feelings since the lawsuit, and I know they are probably not gonna go the route that he's been aware of his feelings (rip shooting as Eddie's oh moment you will always be true to me), but the groundwork for him to be like oh! about Buck at any point is there. And Eddie is a lot more aware of his own feelings than Buck, he wouldn't need someone to kiss him to have the realization, he can have the realization in a less on-the-nose moment. And the thing with the way they have been playing Eddie and his love interests, especially with the added context on Shannon we got last season, that they were friends first and all that, you can make a really strong argument for him to be demisexual and that's why he struggles with the idea of dating, that he feels like that's a performance, and why he has weird chemistry with the woman he pushed himself into dating since Shannon died, and that can absolutely push him towards Buck. Because here's the thing, with Buck dating men, and Eddie's relationship in crisis, he could very well look at Buck and be like "oh, I wasn't aware he was an option" because of the whole struggle with attraction and the way he has such a strong relationship with Buck, and maybe wonder about what it all means, and they can tumble into the realization that maybe they could be more together. That none of them has been secretly pining, but they have such a strong thing going that there's no reason for them not to go there. It could be this natural thing. And it's right there, even more with the comment of Eddie trying to understand his place in the world. Because for Eddie is not about Buck being a man, is about Buck being his best friend, and I think Eddie as a person would need to come to terms with that and he wouldn't get that hung up on the fact that Buck's a man. So Buck can absolutely be his queer awakening. But if Buck had the realization he has feelings for Eddie, he would get hung up on the fact that he is a man if he didn't explore his bisexuality before that.
I kinda think the route we are going here is Buck processing he likes man, Eddie processing he likes Buck, Buck being like "wait men are an option, Eddie is a man, I already have most of the things I'm looking for with Eddie, maybe we can go there" and then maybe some mutual pining before they do go there.
#i just want buck to blue screen the next time he sees eddie shirtless and be like oh fuck he's hot#oasksoaksasokasa#but i kinda think theyll get together in an explosive way if that's where this is going#like i dont know but my both of them are gonna be in danger by the end of the season spec might include Buck straight up kissing Eddie#i mean#i dont realistically think it would happen but i can see the argument for it#i dont know#but yeah#Eddie cant be Buck's bi awakening but Buck can be Eddie's#this got long and rambly sorry#911#911 spoilers#911 speculation#911 meta#????#i really need a tag for asks#anon 😌
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I once left 23+ asks in this box and I haven’t seen them all
Sorry kids! Me and Mark are a little busy with our lessons and activities sometimes, so we don't really get to answer everything quickly!
Yeah..we love every ask though! :}
#yk i have school n a life outside of this right#i really do love asks! i enjoy every single ask!#and somrtimes i save asks which have potential to be a longer ask for later cuz often times im too busy 2 make long asks#i do feel bad that somrtimes i take a while 2 answer asks#but sometimes im just too tired or busy for it#maybe ur asks r in the queue too! currently i have 5 posts queued and it post once a day#please dont demand me 2 answer all your asks quickly. i really dont appreciate it /lh#i love asks though!! please dont take this wrongly. i absolutely adore your asks n i love it when ppl send alot of asks#i just dont really appreciate being rushed 2 do it yk?#slash lighthearted btw. sorry anon ik it can feel annoying when ppl dont answer ur ask for a long period of time#but yeah please be patient with me <3#oop im rambling now ill stop loll this got long#ykw im not even gonna queue this ill just post it rn#ashur gharavi#mark and friends#an answer for an ask#maf#twomp#ask blog
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ok .. so ...
should i make a withered rose anon blog that has severly depressing symbolism with flowers dying/withered roses that have to do with being unable to get over their past because i see a bunch of these emoji anon blogs and they look cool so i want one too
or do i just make an oc.
either way im gonn make them multifandom
do NOT choose the alex one that is for ME i will GET YOU /silly
#✙ 📜 alex's rambles#epic the musical oc#pjo oc#epic the musical anon blog#idk whay else to tag this with#sorry i yapped bc i just got really excited at all the chaos i could cause
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I read your fics and utterly drool over your writing. How did you get better at it, and do you have any advice?
Thank you anon, you're very kind! <3
Practice as much as you can. Read and write every day, if possible. Soak up content/ideas you love and practice it on your own. Too tired to write? Read some fic you enjoy.
Examine your instinctual reactions to writing. Ask yourself: what do I like about this fic? why don't I like this writing style? what is this author doing differently than me? is this something I could attempt?
Get feedback from other writers/readers. It helps if you ask them specific questions, such as "do you think there is a sense of urgency in this chapter?" or "how can I make it seem like they're both yearning when I only show one POV?" Take criticism gracefully, but also cumulatively -- are lots of people giving you the same feedback? Was this just one commenter?
Practice stream-of-consciousness writing if possible. Just sit down with an idea or challenge and let it flow. Don't overthink or double back to edit, just type. What happened? Did you like the result? Why or why not?
Remember that comparison is the theft of joy. I've said it before, but comparing your writing to others' will only make you sad or envious. Your writing style is YOURS, and that's what makes it beautiful! The only comparison you should be making is between past and present writing. And even then, you don't owe anyone improvement -- not even yourself.
#hope this helps <3#sorry it got a little rambly#writing is weird#i am no expert#i really am not#i write smut#asks#personal#myfic#theresurrectionist#writing#writing tips#some of these i've repeated sorry y'all#anon
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Me: I don't know if my ideas are worth sharing, I'm losing engagement from my readerbase these past few months so I must be doing something wrong, I don't think I've really accomplished anything as a writer.
Some person in my AO3 comments hyped as FUCK for the Risen Lamb/Fallen God rewrite:
#hannah's rambles#negative kinda#I've been really feeling down about nearly everything i make lately and it's bothering me a lot#There was this not quite-well-meaning anon I got a few months ago that seemed to compliment me on the surface#But seemed very backhanded#Basically informing me “oh youre basically the most popular writer in the fandom. here are some ways im going to compare you to others”#and i tangentially kinda knew how readers viewed me as a good/semipopular writer but i just ignored it#because i primarily do it for fun#but it made me realize what readers actually do consider in works when theyre looking for a fic they want#and i feel like i've peaked already in a lot of ways#ugh#sorry for kvetching at yall but i feel like y'all deserve to know part of why im just not writing as much lately#sometimes i try to hype myself up so i can still feel like anything of mine is worth reading or writing in the first place#but it's not working anymore
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To the Anon who sent me an ask saying I "should feel fucking awful" for "giving you hope": I'm sorry about your situation, truly. But what did you want to achieve by sending that ask to me?
For context I reblogged a post earlier, mentioning that I hadn't double-checked the info yet as I was at work (my memory is shit, so I reblogged it to remember to check it later). I did check it later, found that the links didn't confirm what the OP claimed, and decided to delete the reblog as I had no reason to keep it on my blog anymore.
I'm going to assume that you're an adult, Anon, and as such it's your own responsibility to check sources and not trust random strangers on the internet (such as me). If you had checked the sources yourself, you would have been able to see that the post didn't add up (lawsuit too new to be approved yet, and the amount of money OP mentioned seemed taken out of thin air). I'm sorry that I didn't sit down and tell everyone that I, a nobody, decided to delete the post from my personal blog. It would perhaps have been a courtesy to do so, but it isn't a responsibility you can demand of strangers on tumblr of all sites.
Again, I'm sorry about your situation and about you getting your hopes up over something I reblogged, but lashing out against a stranger doesn't help anyone. I promise I didn't reblog, and later delete a post without telling you, just so I could hurt you personally.
I do hope you have a kinder new year than the one we're both currently suffering through. Cheers mate
#it's past 2am here - will be 2025 in less than 22 hours - and english isn't my first language so apologies if it's a bit rambly#any time I get anons like this I get so surprised - like - buddy I am a nobody and a stranger? Does it help to lash out at me?#Do you hurt less if you hurt someone else?#I'm sorry that you got your hopes up Anon but I don't know you. I can't help you.#random bloggers on tumblr aren't responsible for your health or checking information for you#and it's not the responsibility of the random bloggers to inform you anytime they delete anything#I wasn't even the one who wrote the post I just reblogged it for myself so I could remember to check the sources after work#no I will not link the post in question here. DON'T go harass the OP of that post they probably meant well#sometimes we post things when we get excited without double-checking everything first and that's okay#gonna turn anon asks off for a while. Don't feel like arguing but if you really need to argue or insult me you do it off anon ok#goodnight#kreft rambles#might delete later
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Funniest ask anyone has ever sent me so far. Will love to use this as a reaction picture thank you from the bottom of my heart
#Okay for some reason this time hater-chan hit harder than usual I've been crying for an hour#but tbh that's probably more about having spent 10 hours at university today running on four hours of sleep and no lunch–#than the asks themselves akzdvisbsjeks#Wrote a longest rant post. Deleted it. Got a reality check feeling much better now 👍#67 asks though? Really?#At least get it to 88. I've heard that's a great number but I wouldn't be able to tell you why 🤔#Finally SORRY for breaking my rule of never addressing anon hate I just found this hilarious aksbdvskdbek.#And trust me they've said A LOT of fun things to me. Like that I'm white (?) or that I'm an Akutagawa stan (????)#But this outdid them all#It's a screenshot though so it doesn't count#random rambles
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Eh, have some Odyssey headcanons
This is nowhere NEAR all of them as I like "revealing" headcanons while writing. I'm also just a very "fluffy" person so heads up! :D
Mentioned it in a different post but Odysseus is very affectionate with his loved ones (overtly so. almost demanding in how he'll just kind of drape himself across you) Even as a kid he was like this. Often just hugging them and/or climbing up them to cuddle. It skyrockets with Penelope, as he was overwhelmed with emotions for her when they first met and that hasn't stopped. Lots of little kisses and nuzzles and cuddling. Almost always clinging to her in some way. He's strange about being touched with basically everyone else though. While he's still caring for his friends, you never know if he's fine with a hug or not. Often times he'll just give you a look of "Don't even think about it" mostly at poor Menelaus as I headcanon him as the most physically affectionate. Lots of slaps on the back and big hugs He's a little hot and cold like that
Adding to that, with Penelope, with said little kisses that he gives a lot of, he's fine with "losing" or "yielding" to her with everything but that. He's always trying to "have the last laugh" or you know, the last affection. He's perfectly fine admitting defeat to her with everything else but this. It's probably something he doesn't even realize that he does. He loves being doted on and pampered by her but also unconsciously thinks "you're getting smothered. As soon as you stop moving your hands through my hair. I'M gonna smother you" Get adored, Penelope. (●♡∀♡) I am living vicariously through these dummies.
Laertes always had a "green thumb" even before he left the palace to work in the fields. He always liked plants. If you know how J.R.R. Tolkein writes, basically nonstop about ferns and undergrowth and such, that's Laertes. If you go on a walk/hunt with him, he'll often just look at plants and be happy and likes to study them. He was very picky about how plants are arranged on the property. He's a bit more quiet and "gruff".
Odysseus definitely mostly takes after his mother in almost everything. Her humor and mischief, her looks, even learned to woodcarve from her. She and Penelope get along great and she's definitely the "life of the party". (it's MY headcanon and I can do what I want!!!) While Laertes loves his trees and plants, it's even better when he can share that knowledge and passion with his wife who creates something entirely new with that plant (aka wood). "That's walnut you know. Did you know it blahblahblahblah".
Ctimine actually takes a lot after Laertes but mostly in the "kind of quiet" way but she's the type to make one-liners that make everyone in the room laugh. (that she gets from her Mother. I actually want Laertes to be kind of awkward lol) It's a "she doesn't talk much but when she does. You should listen because she's fucking funny." She actually likes plants as well. (as a child she would find out what stuff tasted horrible and then dare Odysseus to eat it. And ofc he did it basically every time. "Eat a raw Olive, idiot. >:) " ) and probably was more into herbology and its uses. When Odysseus comes back, she and Laertes want to know every detail of the Lotus and the Moli Root.
Penelope has a sweet tooth! Also, I have her quite short despite being a Naiad as I have a headcanon that like a lot of fish, water nymphs grow to the size of the body of water they're in. Or in this specific case, BORN in. Penelope was born in a creek/stream🥲 Her mom dove into the nearest source of water and that was it. (kind of goes along with her duck myth) She also canonically says the most out-of-pocket shit (remember the sneeze of death???) she's a "weird girl". She has been "weird" since the beginning. Weird girls are hot as fuck, you cowards!
Penelope: One time, I fell asleep at the bottom of the river and I woke up to a catfish trying to eat my arm. Mom and I killed it and ate it afterward. Odysseus, twirling his hair and giggling: You showed that catfish who's boss. You're so hot. Please be my wife
(That's all you're getting on her. The Wife of all time will be getting her own headcanon post all to herself because she deserves it. I am doodling lil hearts around her face. *I am shot by Odysseus*)
This'll probably be my most unpopular one but yeah. Odysseus isn't the shortest of the Achaean kings. He's actually taller than average (great grandchild of Hermes genes and his mom is tall. Laertes is shorter.) and while shorter than the other kings. The title of the shortest goes to Diomedes. I love the thought of this absolute killing machine being the shortest in a "He's small? What can he do?" and then he just fucks everything and everyone up. He's a chihuahua. Small, full of rage, "loud of warcry", and always wanting to fight. >:)
That's all for now. Honestly, thank y'all so much for being so sweet. It really means so so much. I was kind of afraid I was too "fluffy and soft" to make content for the Odyssey fandom as while yes, they've all done monstrous actions and I definitely still plan to have them steal, lie, barter, fight, etc. I kept getting worried if I was just making shit too soft you know? Too fluffy. Too "romantic". I have him sneak into a garden and cut someone's flowers for his wife but would he even do that?? Is that too nice of him?
I wear my heart on my sleeve and in my writing, I'm the same way. :D Just how I am! And I'm having fun!
#btw. the joke with the catfish is also because those fish are fucking disgusting. gummy bottomfeeders. 2x the grossness for the wife#And Odysseus still loves this hot woman as he should#I'm sorry for the babbling at the bottom! I'm just really happy and really appreciate you all😭#my headcanons#I guess??? idk#I have already gotten one “He wouldn't fucking say that” anon a while back and I just got squashed😅#I didn't post it because...yee#I didn't mean her calling him a dog in my fic as in “dog-eyed” like the insult??? like blhe slkdjf#BUUUUUT I'm just gonna chill and do whatever the fuck I want now. and no longer worry too much :D I got my homies ❤#Mad rambles#shot by odysseus
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would it be okay if u told me why u like aoki😭/gen😭😭😭😭BEEN TRYNA LIKE HIM FOR SO LONG I JUST CANTT but i love ur art so much so i still consume it otherwise lol
i liked tohru adachi in high school and tbh i think that alone is enough of an explanation for why i ended up liking aoki
#snap chats#haha see i told you last post's tags were relevant#anyway vLKVJEVLKAEJVLKJ IM CRYING ANON youre so funny. this is the funniest ask i coulda got thank you so much#i dont know why i like him either <- yes i do#fine lets get Real Talk about it#well first off all i thought he looked hot rolling out the elevator and i was playing the eng dub and i think his voice sounds hot there#and thats like. not athing that happens to me ever <- literally thought sawashiro was hot two frames into the game but anyway#i like politician characters. or characters that are in a position of power ESPECIALLY if they have to act like they dont suck balls#like i very much love the idea of the power of charisma and that type of thing not to mention the 'strategizing' as aoki puts it#that comes with politics. LIKE HE SUCKS DONT GET IT TWISTED HE SUCKS BUT //shrug emoji//#like its why i love the mine rggo stories i like seeing mine's thought process and how he uses his intelligence#smart's sexy to me idk what to tell you but moving on#its fun watching him lose his cool too ESP IN HIS FIGHT LMAO HE STOMPIN HIS FOOT LIKE A TODDLER SHUT UP#i also really love the arakawa family in general and thinking of aoki's relationship with each of them makes my brain explode#especially him and sawashiro that shit is painful to watch and i love it so much#i also thought him going from goth to republican was the funniest shit in the world like i howled at that AND i was distraught#aokis so interesting to me from the notion that he IS loved by his family but he has so much hatred for himself it eats him up#and as a result he cant be happy no matter what he does- how hes constantly seeking validation even if it's nothing meaningful#his lil. Dog-Eat-Dog world world belief to ichi also appealed to my edgy depressed high schooler brain. sorry.#his speech at the lockers also got to me. unfortunately. sorry everyone i empathized too hard it got too real it wasnt funny anymore#like as much as i complain bout the very end the ending is what solidified me liking aoki if not also cause of ichi's impact in those scene#plus... analyzing him and the environment around him is so much fun too....#idk reasons for why i like aoki also boil down to personal reasons. he still sucks tho so i cant be upset when people hate him LOL#i probably have more reasons or could elaborate more i love rambling but i mean. who really wants to read all that 💀💀#maybe for a character that WASNT the worst but. aoki is so LMAO#thank you for loving my art regardless :) im sorry i have to be attached to the worst guys ever
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hey guys do y’all remrmber me ..... i am alive and doing well 👍👍
#very VERY sorry for suddenly leaving so long ago#idk i just. leave my social media accs randomly sometimes idk sometimes i need space ig#but i wanna try n be a lil more active on here again <3#a lot has happened since i’ve truly been active on here but welp such is life#i have an active dnd campaign n more close friends now#and i almost booked tickets for the bronze vb olympia match !!#sadly they were all sold out :(#there’s still some old ass asks in my inbox i wanna get to eventually !! taku n anon z i see ur asks! i will answer them !!#might take me a bit to get used to tumblr again. generally not sure just how active i’ll be#we’ll see ig#in case anyone actually reads this especially if i know you: hey!! hello !! i missed you all :((#especially taku n anon z ofc !! <3#bc i mostly only rlly talked to you guys haha#i’m on anti depressants now n actually doing much better in case. anyone was wondering haha#and i’m once again neck deep in a tokrev phase bc i just got a friend into it (we watched the whole of s1 together)#(it took us 5 days)(we were on a school trip n didn’t have anything better to do)#so. uh. yeah#hopefully expect some tokrev stuff from me :3#glad to be back guys <3#really missed this tbh#☆—`elys rambles
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i hope you’re doing okay. 💙 it’s ok if you don’t answer this, i just wanted you to know folks are still thinking about you and wanting good things for you.
thank you babe (and thank you to everyone else who sent a message to this effect; i will answer them when i can)
i'm doing pretty well right now. i've been very busy at work, working on a top secret classified project (god only knows when you'll get more details than what i've already shared ;3), and also just. recovering from depression. there is so much of my life that even months out from the worst of it, i'm still trying to pull the pieces back together.
i have been writing a little. it's been difficult, mostly because of numerous incidents regarding writing and mental health (if you've been here for a while, you probably know about them; if you're new, the tldr is "mallowstep went off the wall for a bit and he's fine but it left him feeling bad"), and now i face down the summer which is...rough, mentally.
i don't know what normal looks like for me right now. i want to write but i don't know how it will fit into my life. i'm still making space for myself, in all the chaos and reconstruction. i know writing will be a part of normal for me. i just don't know where it fits yet.
it's been a while since i've felt like myself. the hollow feeling is abating. i am finding words to describe emotion again, that are more than just there or missing. i have been thinking about the stories i have yet to work on. what i want to tell next.
it has been an incredible two years for me. when i started this blog, i had just been broken up with by my boyfriend of three years, only a month or so after my childhood cat and dog had died one day apart. i was coping with so much impossible grief: i wrote the second chapter of i'll come back to you someday soon myself after my grandmother died, and i did not write anything after that for quite a while.
my wrists are healing. they hurt a little today and i'm not sure why, but they are healing.
i'll be going back to university as a natural resources major. i want a job that lets me protect and cultivate the forests i find so much comfort in. the complex webs of their ecosystems bring me so much delight. did you know trees talk to their daughters? did you know they care for their children? protect them?
it has been an incredible two years. i met my now-partner, learned how to actually trust people, and failed out of a year of college due to collapsing mental health. i went through approximately one million assessments to get a diagnosis and understand what was happening to me. i had a doctor tell me i was being undermedicated to an astounding degree. i had to let go of my beloved plants because i couldn't keep myself alive, much less then. i found a job i love so much i am eager to go to work every morning.
i honestly don't think i would've recognized who i am now, back when i started out here. i have become someone who trusts. who has connections with people. who does not fear so much. (i have also become someone who cries as i drive home from work sometimes. i have also become someone who needs to sit on the floor and count all the pieces of art i can see. we move in spirals, not straight lines.)
all of this is to say, i have been quiet on here for quite a while because i have been recovering from two years (a lifetime) of some truly exhausting events, as well as letting myself find things i enjoy. when i got out of high school, i loved what i was doing academically. i had very little passion. it had been bled out of me.
i am incredibly grateful to each and every one of you. your support, even in my period of dormancy, has meant so much. my relationship with writing sometimes feels like i am fighting my double, trying to balance both my need to use writing to understand myself, and my tendencies to ruin myself in the process.
i still don't have any promises to make, because i really don't know what's next for me. but i am still here, and you all still mean something to me.
with all my love, mallow
#ask#mine#anon#update#sorry this got like#so rambly#it's just really been an incredible two years#so much has changed#who i was when i started this blog feels like a stranger#it hasn't been an easy journey#and i have been trying to recover#to heal#to find new things i never thought to try for#it has taken so much up out of me#that being said#(if i were the promising type)#i would look for the next chapter of ashes ;3#before anything else#but that's just a guess#who knows where i'll truly go
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internal locus. purpose.
did you know that pluto just yesterday retrograded (as in, moved back) into capricorn, and that this will be the last time in our lifetimes that it will be?
i'm not well-versed in astrology, but from what i can recall, pluto is the planet of death, and rebirth. endings and new beginnings. overturning the deepest parts of us and bringing them to light. like preparing soil for a new planting season. upheaval. change. control. transformation.
the house you have capricorn in will be the area of your life where you will feel this transit the most, until it moves back into aquarius in october, i believe. for me, i have my mars in capricorn, at 27° (for the astrologers here), which sits in the fifth house, of creativity and self-expression, of all types, including love and affection.
the year pluto first moved into capricorn was back in 2008. and this pluto retrograde asks us to look back at the last sixteen years, to reflect on our respective pasts, what began and what ended, what lessons were learned. who we were and who we are.
you can imagine what lessons i'm currently having to revisit and reflect on, and on what changes have been made since i was young.
this isn't to say that i'm attributing my efforts to learn from my mistakes, and to learn to love who i am and the ways in which i express who that is, to the way a planet in the sky has moved through the past sixteen years. i crawled on my scraped and bruised and bleeding hands and knees to get here. because i didn't want to be the girl i was at twelve, or fifteen, or eighteen, or twenty-one. and i will crawl on forward just the same if i have to. because i still have so much to learn. even in all of this pain. especially in all of this pain.
i think these sudden bursts of emotion, and my subsequent rambles about my heartbreak, is me doing just that. crawling, if i have to, to the other side of all of this. because there is a life to be lived there. and there is a life to be lived in the meantime. and that life includes living, and feeling, and allowing, the pain of it all.
sometimes you need to fall apart. sometimes you need to burn. how a bone breaks and grows back stronger. how forests have to burn a little to flourish.
#?#if i got any of that info about this pluto retrograde#and what i'd said about the fifth house and pluto#wrong#please let me know ;w;#i'm a tarot girlie not an astrology girlie </3#also anon; everyday i wake up with the intention of trying to move on if that's what this ask is about#it probably doesn't seem like it#but since i'd gotten over my guilt#i've been in the process of accepting my situation for what it was and what it is now#i'm just trying to let myself feel and feel it all out until i can't feel it anymore#i wouldn't worry too much#but thank you. really. i'm glad you stopped by :'^) (and i'm sorry for rambling about astrology stuff ;v;)
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It’s quite annoying to me how they treated Wallace in the Master’s Eight too. He is a champion, or at least champion level and is literally only used to flaunt how strong Ash is now. Most of the battle happens off screen!
Right??? Like I know a lot of peeps in this fandom just forgets that Wallace was ever a Champion and Steven will always be the default Hoenn Champion but like💀 it's stated again and again Wallace is a Champion, he's a strong trainer, even Steven in the manga thinks he couldn't live up to Wallace's legacy as Hoenn's Champion, if anything he's more deserving to be in the M8 than Alain
And god the fucking off screen battles I fucking hated how they handled Diantha's battle with Leon like the episode was just abt a kid who lost her pkmn and when Cyn and Ash got back Dia's on her last Mon like that's so shit man if they wanna make Leon strong let people see why he's strong, let people see him strategize too, let people see him struggle against another fucking Champion that got to the semi finals against him, cause honest to god the way they handled that fight looks like they gave Leon gameshark cheats💀
#the hatred i feel over the tournament is resurfacing omfs hahahah#no its just.. it really couldve been so much better yknow#its a hot mess and its cool to see the champions battling each other but damn#the way they did just shows favouritism yknow#also cmon cynthia not using stealth rock at the start of the battle💀💀#i read somewhere that cynthia was preparing for leon thus the stealth rock and all the dragon moves#but shit least they could do is let her set up stealth rock at the fuckin start#ough... sorry im rambling so much cjdmdn hahaha#also me being delulu believing iris didnt need any gimmick bc shes strong like that#but like... homegirl at least deserves the bond phenomena too like her bond w her haxorus is smth else man#if ash can do the bond phenomena w lucario a mon he just got why can iris do so w her haxorus who she raised for so long now#i have so many feelings abt this omfs jdkdns hahaha#pokemon#pokemon champions#an ask and an answer#anon
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