#sorry about it i tried i TRIED .
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blu-engineer · 5 months ago
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favorite stan twins characterization is that they're both equally insane. stanley just gets more air time to show it off. loosely inspired by a post i read earlier but here's some absolutely insane things both of them have done
stanley:
drugged a person and turned them into an exhibit in the mystery shack
had a vegas wedding to a prospector-themed novelty dispenser
gave mabel a grappling hook
failed to steal an animatronic badger
chewed his way out of the trunk of a car
punched at least three bald eagles
is multiply divorced, possibly even with the novelty dispenser
committed premeditated murder on a llama
faked a heart attack to get on Wheel of Fortune
took his clothes off in front of a live studio audience on Wheel of Fortune
has a rivalry with a fifth grader, a grandmother, and a man who exclusively dresses like a corn cob
stanford:
pulled a gun on a bus driver when he wouldn't let a pig on board
directly assisted in mind-controlling ronald reagan during his election in 1980
gave mabel a crossbow
got bitten by a vampire bat and subsequently began sampling human blood
owns contraband outlawed in 9000 dimensions; keeps it in an extremely flimsy plastic case
"accidentally" set a hawk on fire
has exes ranging from as normal as his old college buddy to as weird as a triangle and an alien with 7 eyes who put a metal plate in his head
wears turtlenecks because he's hiding multiple tattoos he regrets, including one themed around "all star" by smash mouth
is an Extremely wanted criminal across hundreds of dimensions; was completely kicked out of one for card counting
is, bizarrely, super into the band Eurythmics
can see shrimp colors
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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 3 months ago
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main take aways from Halloween (1978) rewatch:
michael myers is canonically 21??? this bitch should be at the club
*sees tiddies* ***MURDEROUS RAMPAGE NOISES***
that's it that's the movie
outside of the fact that everyone who has sex is murdered by the narrative, this is a surprisingly chill portrayal of female sexuality? these teen girls are horny and actively enjoying Getting It On with their boytoys. no pushy boyfriends sneaking in through their bedroom windows--these ladies are taking the initiative to sneak out and GET SOME. one of them gets laid and then immediately orders her boyfriend to get her a beer. (yes she gets Slashered soon afterward, but so does the boyfriend so honestly, gender equality.) yes the Final Girl is the only one not having sex, but she's not bullied for that, nor are her friends slut shamed except possibly by being murdered by the narrative
actually the only character who is shown being morally condemned on-screen is michael myers. specifically FOR his violent overreaction to other people's sex lives. (people he is spying on). metaphorically, the villain is American Puritanism sticking its judgy nose into other people's business.
aka Michael Myers Is A Republican
but actually the real villain is the doctor. guy's a judgemental, shaming, pathologizing asshole. and he's been in charge of michael's care since he was SIX YEARS OLD? kid never had a chance. i'd go on a killing spree too
also the parents. where are the parents? it's halloween night and all the teenage girls are home babysitting their younger siblings? come to think of it, michael's first victim was his own older sister, whom he killed while she was babysitting him. teen girls are really shouldering a labour burden here. maybe parentification is the true villain
side note: mike commits his first murder wearing a clown costume...which is never referenced again? his 'iconic' costume is a generic mask and wig and jumpsuit, when we coulda had a Killer Clown Michael Myers??? travesty
i like how the Final Girl and her friend casually smoke weed in her car. yeah she's an honor student and her friend is the sheriff's daughter. yeah they smoke weed. so what it's 1978
(to reiterate, mike is 21 and should be at the club. im not saying he shouldn't be rampaging, im saying it's sad that he broke out, tasted freedom for the first time in his life, and immediately snuck back into his childhood home to go rampaging. let's have a remake where he goes to a nightclub and has a few beers. maybe some slutty dancing. then rampage)
oh no he's hot
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#HALLOWEEN#halloween the movie#michael myers#do you think he's a mike? mikey? to his friends? if slashers had friends?#i'll be honest i was expecting this movie to be way more of a bitch to its female characters#i mean yeah they died but so did some dudes#there's just a lack of cattiness compared to the way most later movies portrayed teenage girls idk#yeah the Final Girl is a Virgin and a Bookworm. but there's no bullying or any strong sense that's she's morally superior to everyone else#mostly she AND the other girls feel a bit sorry for her lack of a social life. one even tries to set her up with a date to the school dance#solidarity! trying to get your nerd friend laid!#overall it's just teenagers being teenagers and then a slasher comes in and ruins everything with his Lack Of Chill#like yeah dude sometimes teenagers have sex. get over it#also something to be said about how while the girl who survives is the one who isn't sexually active and dresses conservatively...#ultimately those things aren't ENOUGH to prevent her from being targeted#you could say that the other girls 'provoked' the villain (the same way women irl are so often accused of provoking their attackers)#but ultimately that doesn't keep the Final Girl safe. it just delays the inevitable.#because violent men never need excuses. no matter how eager society is to provide them.#ultimately she is at the mercy of the same violent whims because it was never her behavior that invited the violence.#gendered violence doesn't need an invitation.#also she doesn't save herself the doctor saves her#it's not her actions or choices that put her in danger OR save her from it--once again it is the whim of a man#no this wasn't intended to be a feminist movie it's just fun how you could argue it that way
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herd-reject-arts · 1 year ago
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So I'm leaving work and something darts in front of me, maybe 10ft away, too fast for me to see what it is. Peek around the tree blocking my path and I see this
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Just like... a whole ass hawk. Dude's gotta be about 1.5ft tall. Massive fucking bird. And it's just staring me straight in my soul like this, even as I try to move ahead. It didn't budge. And there's only this path back to my car unless I want to walk on a busy highway. So I have the option of Death By Raptor or Death By Truck.
So I walk in the poison ivy filled patch off the sidewalk. Guy still isn't moving. Still staring me directly in the eyes. And I do this thing when animals are behaving strangely where I'll talk to them, so I'm just like, "Hey, man. I don't know you. You don't know me. This feels really threatening. I'm just trying to get to my car, dude. Can I get some space please? You're a big fucking bird. I see those claws. You could kill me right now, but I'd appreciate if you didn't, ok?"
It didn't move until I was about 2ft away. Again: I'm as far from it as I can be without walking into the street. It clearly wasn't going to budge. I walk past, thing flies up (silent, btw. Scary) and lands on a brick wall a little further ahead
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Anyway. Weird guy. Nearly shit my pants when I noticed a bird big enough to carry off a fully grown cat was just... there, staring me in the face, unwilling to move away from me, a human, something it should see as a threat. I watched behind me the whole rest of the way to my car, just in case this bird decided to help me shed this mortal coil. 10/10 experience. Super cool guy.
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clouvu · 5 months ago
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Cooking up an older Clervie outfit design so I don't have to keep drawing her looking like her child self but Long
#genshin impact#clervie#ngl i have so many thoughts about an older clrv's design but at the same time artistically im not that creative </3#mostly tried to make her look more like a direct contrast to arlecchino's design (which was already present but we ignore that)#cause arle's design is mostly very sharp and angular while i'd imagine clervie's being much more rounded out and softer#like they are the round vs pointy cat meme in human form#the hair was really tricky cause on one hand much like everyone else we dont really keep the same hairstyle our entire lives#butttttt at the same time idk i feel like her long hair flowing down (and her headband) are very recognizable parts of her#so i decided to not change much (also cause i dont trust myself making multiple drastic changes without changing their identity too much)#also halfways through coloring I realized she's kinda giving crucabena outfit wise but we ignore that </3#anyways clervie would def be a support/healer character if actually playable (leaning more towards buffer support imo)#ITS A MASSIVE 50/50 IF SHE WOULD BE A HYDRO OR ANEMO USER but i decided hydro for the time being cause it compliments HOTH's dpses more#aka Arlecchino Lyney and partially Freminet since if i remember correctly he's more physical based but cryo nonetheless#i just really like the idea of Clervie's passive being along the lines of boosting stats/dmg if there's HOTH members present in a team#anyways sorry for the text wall I just really need to be kicked out of the kitchen#i am UNDERCOOKING the food#character design is not my passion </3
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vaguely-concerned · 6 months ago
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are. are you telling me that if the romanced mage warden dies and alistair is king, he deadass stares greagoir down over her dead body and grants the circle of ferelden its autonomy after ordering it rebuilt somewhere safer. first you have to deliberately leave him behind so he won't die for you and then he does that for you once you're gone, even when you're broken up??? absolute and literal king behaviour of the highest order????? the actions speak louder than words of it all??????? I think I hauve covid
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st-hedge · 8 months ago
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I can’t believe they’d managed to animate kusuriuri’s insane character design and then decided to make it even more insane. The most character ever
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smokin-salmon · 8 months ago
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Fuck it. *Makes the old woman cry*
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tubbytarchia · 8 months ago
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got an urge to design ponies oops
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bigfatbreak · 1 year ago
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Does Chloe tone down her direct bullying/harassment of Marinette after that day to just the dead mom jokes out of guilt, or is it more that Marinette now being homeschooled means Chloe just lost access? Also, does Lila try the whole lying/sabotaging thing on Marinette and just fail or does Marinette just not care?
Lila has no reason to sabotage Marinette because Marinette isn't threatening her little empire she wants to build. In fact, she really wants Marinette on her side BECAUSE she's not apart of the school, so she doesn't need to keep up an elaborate web of lies! She can just try to befriend a talented girl who makes AMAZING food and try to get freebies~
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meanwhile, with Chloe, things got really complicated after the pool incident...
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Tom was not in the mood to put up with this crap.
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azamansource · 14 days ago
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assad zaman or bambi (x)
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ryllen · 3 months ago
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Older Sylus as actual dad 😭👌✨
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royalarchivist · 18 days ago
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Phil: The last time I got like, legitimately fckin' angry on stream was when my- my Egg child died. Sorry– my two Egg children died in a really dumb way, and I got genuinely pissed off. And that was– that was the last time I got like, visibly mad.
Sneeg: Dude, that sht looked stressful. That server looked stressful with- with the Egg stuff.
Phil: It was! Mhmm. It fckin was, it was like, crazy! I got to meet a lot of really cool people, so I'll always just be thankful for that, and not just think about the stressful times, like...
Sneeg: True. Yeah, well... Ain't that life. [Laughs]
Phil: [Laughs and says in a sing-songy voice] "That's life!"
Sneeg: Ain't that life– of being like "Wow, a lot of this was very scary, but at least I got to do some cool sht, I suppose." [Laughs]
Phil: [Laughs] Yeah.
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skipblebee · 1 month ago
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Bingqiu they could never ever make me hate you
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remxedmoon · 3 months ago
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seeing eye to eye.
im going to be real i only made this for the sake of the caption. i was proud of it!! aaaa i’ve had the sketch for this done for like… 2 weeks now? i just didn’t really know how i actually wanted to execute it!! and i remembered seeing that one 3d glasses trend on twitter a while back! and i think it worked pretty well teehee :3
also as a sidenote, this is probably the fastest ive ever finished a drawing? this only took, like, an hour. which isn’t that surprising, this is a pretty simple drawing, it’s just interesting to me! and a little funny given it took me 2 weeks to get back to this. i really procrastinated for weeks over this??
anyways!!! here’s some alt versions with both sides! because i think they look cool!
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bubblingsteam · 8 months ago
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vaguely-concerned · 24 days ago
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can you even imagine what a fucking horror show the early game is from spite's perspective, though. not only is this funky forcibly severed little slip of the fade having to deal with the reverse cosmic horror of physical reality as perceived by a spirit and being trapped in it against its will -- existentially confused and disoriented and hurting and nothing makes any kind of sense, at the mercy of human cruelty at its most deliberately sadistic. and then the one source of comfort and compassion and some kind of safety and clarity that lucanis surely must have been to him in the ossuary despite everything just goes and shuts himself in his room inside with a seemingly passive aggressive number of locks between them and no explanation and won't speak to him and they're STILL in the fucking ossuary. rook came and found them and they could be free now (rook is here!) and still lucanis keeps them in the ossuary even though he PROMISED he promised they'd get out of there together!!! what the fuck DO you think at that point? like did he trick me that whole time??? he wasn't like zara before, so why is he doing this to me now? why isn't he saying anything? 'he won't move. I can't reach him'. at least in the ossuary they had a deal, a goal, a hope -- each other. at least he wasn't entirely alone, before.
this poor poor poor little spite spirit really was ferried into the real world like 'hey welcome to reality! as your first introduction to it you're first getting horrifically tortured and then getting to vicariously experience one of THE most distressing and harrowing psychological conditions the human brain can cook up for itself (a fully fledged and deeply entrenched freeze response flaring up with catastrophic severity due to an unbroken ongoing and unlikely to let up any time soon chain of Unfortunately... Recent Events). I think spite is being extremely reasonable and patient about the whole thing, when you put it into perspective. I'm not saying let him eat the self-lighting candles or anything, but he's got some extremely valid points along the way lol. spite is not only child-like, the metaphor work going on is a lot more pleasingly flexible and complex than that, but he is also helplessly existentially dependent on lucanis in a way that, if anything, is a heightened version of the way a child (or child part) has to depend on a parent to navigate the world and survive.
tl;dr: we truly don't give enough sympathy to spite for having to live in the head of lucanis dellamorte. a place even lucanis dellamorte would prefer not to be. to be fair to him I think lucanis would be the first person to agree with this lol
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