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xxshewritesinblacknwhitexx · 1 year ago

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Synopsis: Lena Daniels has been in love with Jax Teller for half of her life. As she finally gains his heart, an old love comes back to Charming and threatens their future. Will Lena be able to handle Tara, and Jax’s steady rise into the President’s chair with SAMCRO?

Pairings: Jax Teller x Lena Daniels (OC), Jax Teller x Tara Knowles (past, mentioned), Jax Teller x Wendy Case (past)

Time Setting: Seasons 1-7

Warnings: fluff, angst, unprotected sex (wrap it, before you tap it, folks), pregnancy, insecurities, infidelity, canon SOA violence & gore, STRONG language, drug & alcohol use, rape, lots of taking the LORD’s name in vain, mentions of racism, and character deaths

Author’s Note: So, this is my first Sons of Anarchy story for those of you who are fans of the show. This fic is a Dark Fic. It is set during the timeline of the entire series, but I’m not going full canon. There will be things that are actually what happened in the show, but with my own twist, and things that are not show canon. The narrative is set to fit the story itself. If you are a Tara Knowles fan, be warned, as this story may not be for you. Also please HEED the warnings. They are there for those get triggered by certain topics. I will post another warning before each chapter to give a final warning.

Chapter Six - Repost

warnings: miscarriage, alcohol abuse, angst, public masturbation

"I'm so sorry, Jackson. She lost the baby."

Jax felt his heart fall into the pit of his stomach, as he took a step back from his mother's reach. "She lost," he choked, "she lost the baby?" He questioned in disbelief. This wasn't happening. It couldn't be happening.

Gemma swallowed thickly, nodding her head. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart."

Jax ran a hand across his tired face, trying to qualm his growing emotions. "Where is she? I need to see her."

"She's in there." Clay stepped up and pointed to the room that was directly right behind them.

Jax immediately sidestepped his mother and stepfather and quickly headed toward the room. He was desperate to see Lena.

"Jax," Gemma called out to stop him, "she's resting right now. They gave her a sedative for the pain."

Jax ignored his mother and made his way inside the room. The moment he shut the door behind himself, the image he saw nearly broke his heart. Lena was laying turned away from the door. She was curled into the fetal position, soundly asleep.

Jax swallowed the lump at the back of his throat, just looking at her form. His guilt quickly started eating at him. If he hadn't been dealing with Tara and Kohn, which he for sure thought had left town, then he could have been there for Lena. He was such a fucking idiot.

Releasing a deep breath, Jax cautiously made his way toward his Old Lady. He wasn't sure he should bother her, but he just needed to be near her. He needed to let her know that he was here. When he finally stopped right in front of her, he tried to hold back his own tears at the pained expression on her face; the stains of her tears tracked down her cheeks. He slowly reached out and ran a soothing hand across her cheek, before leaning forward to place a gentle kiss against her forehead.

Lena sucked in a huge breath, nearly waking in a panic. Her eyes immediately began to frantically search around her, before they landed on Jax. The relief that he was here sat in the pit of her now empty belly. "Jax," she barely choked out.

"I'm here, baby." Jax continued to stroke his rough, calloused thumb against the softness of her cheek.

Lena's bottom lip trembled, as she desperately grabbed ahold of his kutte and pulled him further to her. "I'm so sorry, Jax."

Jax shook his head. "Baby, this is not your fault, okay." He whispered, leaning forward to brush a gentle kiss across her lips, before gathering her into his arms.

Lena clutched onto Jax as much as she could, as she released a full body sob into his chest.

Lena was finally released from the hospital the following morning. Jax was by her side every step of the way, even helping her into Gemma's truck, and following right behind them on his bike.

Lena had barely spoken a word since she had cried herself to sleep in Jax's arms the night before. When the Doctor, who came to release her, asked her how she was feeling, she replied with one simple word: empty.

Upon hearing her say that word caused Jax's heart to break a little more. The guilt for leaving her that night for Tara weighed even heavily in his gut.

When they arrived back at the house, Jax helped lay Lena down into what he was now calling their bed. He could only sadly watch as she curled herself away from him.

Jax swallowed thickly, covering her body with the comforter, before taking a seat behind her. "Hey," he whispered, reaching over to splay his hand against her curvy hip, "you need anything?"

Lena sniffled, wiping a stray tear, and just shook her head: Her only answer.

"Baby," Jax exasperated. He had no idea what to do here. "I want to help you. Please, tell me what I can do to help you."

Things were quiet for a few moments, and Jax thought Lena wasn't going to answer, until she squeaked out, "where were you last night?"

That question immediately caught Jax off guard. He didn't know exactly what to say. If he told her the truth then he would run the risk of her shutting down on him. But he didn't want to lie to her either. So, he just stayed silent.

"So," Lena whispered softly and sniffed again, "I'll take your silence as you were with Tara."

Jax sighed heavily. "She needed my help with Kohn."

Lena was quiet for another few moments, before she choked, "I needed you, Jax. We needed you."

"Jesus Christ." Jax released a shuddering breath, leaning forward on his elbows, and shoving his face in his hands. He literally had no idea what to do for her and wanted to comfort her so badly. He knew he had royally fucked up.

After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence, Jax finally stood his feet. He then leaned over to kiss her temple, relieved when she didn't pull away from him. "I'll be back." He told her, but he didn't receive an answer in return.

Jax pursed his lips and then slowly made his way out of the room only to find his mother, Gemma, patiently waiting in the hallway.

"How is she?" Gemma walked up to her son, seeing the pain in his blue eyes. Her heart broke for the both of them. She knew the pain of losing a child.

Jax released a deep breath, running his fingers through his hair. He quickly glanced back at the room and then back at his mother. "Not good, mom. I want to help her, but I'm not even sure I know how."

Gemma folded her arms together in a comforting manner. "She's gonna be fine, Jackson. She just needs some time to adjust. She just lost a baby. That's a traumatic thing to go through, baby. You need me to stay with her while you meet with the club?"

Jax looked back at the room once again, thinking about it for a second, before he shook his head. "Nah, I think I'm gonna stay here with her. Make sure she eats an' shit, and I kinda don't wanna leave her side tonight. You go home." He reached forward and gave her arms a gentle squeeze.

"You sure?" Gemma questioned, and he nodded. "Okay, sweetheart." She then pulled him into a hug and kissed his cheek. "You call if you need anything."

"I will." Jax told his mother, as he walked her out of his house. Gemma gave him one last hug before he closed and locked the door.

Releasing another breath, Jax looked down the empty foyer in desolation. He slowly removed his kutte, hanging it on the coat rack, and made his way back to his bedroom. As he opened the door, he found her in the same position he had left her in just a few minutes ago, but this time she was asleep. He knew that the pain medication she had been subscribed had already kicked in.

He stood by the frame of his bedroom door, watching as her body rose and fell with each breath she took. After a few minutes, he then proceeded to pull his hoodie over his head, along with his white t-shirt, dropping them onto the floor. He finally toed off his white sneakers and removed his jeans, before finally climbing into the bed next to Lena.

Jax continued to watch Lena for a few moments. He reached out and gently grabbed her hand. She subconsciously turned over and draped her body across his, snuggling closer into his warmth. He then placed a gentle kiss on her forehead and laid her open palm against his bare chest.

The next morning Lena's eyes fluttered open, and she was graced with the presence of the most beautiful, crystal blue eyes she loved so much.

"Hey," Jax ran a soothing hand across her mountain of curls, "I gotta go take care of some club shit, okay. I'll be back in a little while."

Lena just nodded her head, still not feeling up to speaking.

Jax sighed, kissing her forehead softly. "I made you some tea." He pointed to the steaming cup on the bedside table. "And there's some eggs and toast in the microwave."

This was exactly what Jax did every morning for the next week. He'd make her eggs, toast, and tea, before leaving every morning. The first four days he would come home disappointed to find that the eggs and toast were still in the microwave and the tea was barely touched. He'd also find her still curled in the same fetal position he left her in. By day five, the tea was drank, the toast was eaten, and it looked as if she had made some type of vital effort to shower. She would still be in bed by the time he got home though.

Then yesterday all of it was gone.

Today, after Church, Jax made a quick stop at home to check in on Lena. Much to his shock and surprise, she was finally up and about.

"Hey," Jax said walking into the bedroom to find Lena tying the straps of her boots. "You're up?"

Lena looked up at Jax, giving him a warm smile. This was the first time in days that she had shown him some source of light. "Yeah, I figured it was time to finally stop grieving. It's time to move on. I'm sorry I've been such a recluse."

Jax shook his head dismissively, shoving his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. "Lena," he breathed, "please, don't blame yourself for any of this. Losing the baby wasn't your fault. The doctor said that sometimes it just happens. No reasons why."

"I know." Lena replied desolately. "But I can't help but feel like it is." Jax went to tell her that she didn't need to, but couldn't form the words, when she stood to her feet and approached him. "I just want to thank you for giving me the time that I needed." She stood on the tips of her toes and pressed her lips softly against his and quickly pulled away.

"Where you going?" Jax questioned, watching as she reached for her things.

"Just to stop by my house really quick, grab some more things, then I'm gonna head to the clubhouse. I can't stay in this room like this any longer." Lena told him, moving around the room in a dizzying blur.

And before Jax could protest, Lena had already disappeared from his sight.

Lena arrived at the clubhouse a short time later. She walked in to see Clay and Piney sitting at the bar with some strange, balding, short guy she had never seen before. Ever since she could remember, the club had always been bringing strange people she had never met around. She knew the deal: to keep smiling and never ask questions, unless spoken to.

"Well, well, well, look who's back on her feet." Clay boastfully announced with a huge grin on his face, as he saw Lena making her way toward them. "What are you doing here?"

Lena approached the MC President, and her Old Man's stepdad, giving him a warm hug and a kiss to the cheek. "I just figured you needed me to get back to work."

Clay shook his head dismissively, hand on her shoulder. "That's nonsense, girl. Take all the time you need. That's what we got the Prospect for." He smiled again.

"No," Lena responded, heading behind the bar to put her things away, "I have to do something. I can't just lay around and wallow anymore. It's not good for me."

"How're you feeling?" Piney question, placing a comforting hand on hers.

Lena looked down at the gesture, a million thoughts running through her mind. After she had the miscarriage, news of her failed pregnancy spread like wildfire through the MC. A pregnancy she wasn't even ready to announce yet. Not that it even mattered anymore. Some of the croweaters, she didn't know about, and even the Nevada charter, were sending in their condolences. She was grateful for their support, but she was also really tired of it. She just wanted to not think of it anymore. Every time she did, that emptiness she now felt would start to suffocate her.

"I'm okay, Piney." Lena swallowed thickly, giving her grandfather's closest friend a warm smile back. She then looked over to the strange man who was sitting there quietly, staring at her breasts in her low cut top, while sipping on his mug of beer. "Hi."

"Hi." The guy nodded a little too skittishly, his eyes leaving her chest.

"Lee, this is Chucky." Clay pointed toward the jumpy man. "Chucky, this is Lena. She's Jax's Old Lady."

Lena reached out to shake Chucky's already outstretched hand when Piney not so subtly placed his hand over hers, stopping her actions. She turned to the old man, giving him a look of confusion, and he just shook his head in warning.

Lena then soon found out why.

Chucky, feeling a bit rejected by Lena, immediately stuck his hand down his khaki pants and started jackhammering on his genitals.

Lena choked back, standing there wide eyed really not believing her eyes. This strange man was actually masturbating in front of all three of them. She then turned to look at Clay and Piney, and they both reassured her that she wasn't going crazy.

"Yeah," Clay began, sounding so done, "he's got that, what do you call it?" He turned to look at Chucky. "Compuls–"

"Compulsive Masturbation Disorder, CMD." Chucky explained, still going to town on himself.

Lena pulled a face of disgust, but still not looking away. It was like watching a car wreck, and Chucky was showing no signs of stopping.

"Alright," Clay boasted, "get your goddamn hands out of your pants, Chucky. There's a lady present."

Chucky stopped, looking over at Lena, who still had yet to look away. "I accept that." He immediately removed his hand from his pants. "Sorry about that." He looked back at Lena, apologetically, "it literally has a mind of its own. Especially now without my meds."

"I guess it's all good." Lena commented, before looking at Piney and Clay once more. "I thought boys got over that after 13." She joked, causing both Piney and Clay to chuckle.

"Hey, sweetheart," Clay turned back to Lena, gesturing between himself, Chucky, and Piney, "could you give us a few? We gotta talk business."

Lena nodded, grabbing both Clay and Chucky's now empty glasses to wash them. "Okay, I guess I'll be in the back doing some inventory."

"Thank you." Clay told her. "Glad to have you back."

Lena gave Clay another warm smile, before retreating into the back kitchen. When she got there, she immediately noticed the mountain of boxes of delivered alcohol piled high, in the corner. These boxes weren't there over a week ago. It was almost like they had been patiently waiting for her. It was always like this though. If she didn't show up for a day or two, things would just go to the wayside, waiting for her to come back. It was almost as if she were running the bar herself.

Lena released a heavy sigh, walking over to the sink and tossing the heavy mugs inside. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry. But she knew she couldn't. So, she just swallowed all of those feelings down and started her task. At least dealing with this, she didn't have to deal with all the other shit on her mind.

After finally getting those boxes situated, Lena found herself arranging and cleaning the liquor shelf back out front. She had completed the much needed inventory, and was now tasking herself with doing other things. As, again, if she wouldn't do it, then no one would.

The clubhouse was completely dead. Clay and Piney disappeared with that masturbating freak, so it just left her and maybe one or two other people. The rest of the MC would more than likely show up a little later on.

As Lena turned to write down some notes of things she had missed that needed to be ordered, her stomach dropped at the sight of Tara Knowles strolling her way inside. This woman had the worst time of showing up unexpectedly. Tara was the last person that Lena needed or even wanted to see right now.

"What are you doing here?" Lena questioned, when Tara cautiously approached her. "Jax isn't here."

Tara nodded nervously, now standing on the opposite side of the bar from Lena. Her bright eyes began to look around her familiar surroundings, everything rushing back to her. "I know. I'm here to see you, actually."

Lena's brows furrowed in confusion. What could possibly be the reason that the good doctor needed to see her? "Me? Why?"

Tara cleared her throat and finally took a seat. "Jax told me what happened, and I just wanted to personally offer my condolences."

Lena actually giggled at that, but there was no humor behind it. This bitch wasn't serious, was she? "Your condolences? Are you serious? You know what Tara? You can take your condolences and shove them right up your skinny ass." She spat bitterly. She was too emotionally unstable to deal with Tara at this moment. Just thinking about Jax not being with her, at a time when she needed him the most, to help Tara deal with her psycho stalker ex-boyfriend, caused the blood to boil in Lena's system.

"Excuse me?" Tara looked at Lena a little taken aback.

"I don't know what you thought by coming here and offering your condolences was gonna do when you and I both know that it's bullshit."

"It's not bullshit, Lena." Tara muttered in shock. "I just don't want–"

"It's not bullshit?" Lena cut Tara off, and all she felt was pure anger. "You say that you're not here for Jax –that you didn't come back to Charming for Jax– but yet every time I see him, you're lurking in his vicinity."

"I'm his son's surgeon." Tara tried to justify, her dark brows furrowing in confusion.

"Is that what you tell yourself at night, Tara?" Lena snipped. She could see right through Tara's pathetic condolences. She knew Jax's ex was feeling some type of guilt. "To make yourself feel better?"

"Look," Tara released a deep breath, "I just came here to–"

Lena quickly cut her off. "I know exactly what you just came here to do, and I'm putting an end to it right now. Just so we're clear, you and I need to get a few things straight, Tara. First, you being around Jax, relying on him to deal with your shit, that ends now." Tara went to protest when Lena threw a hand up to stop her in her tracks. "Second of all, you need to learn your place in this town. I'm Jax's Old Lady, now, not you. You gave that right up 10 years ago when you snuck out of here like a thief in the night without a second glance. Jax loves me. You're his past. I'm his future. And if you want to call this marking my territory, then have the fuck at it. But I am making sure you are aware that Jax is mine. Are we clear?"

Tara pursed her lips, trying to figure out what she was going to say next. But she thought better of it and just nodded her head. "Crystal."

"Good," Lena paused for a moment, before smacking her lips together, "now I need you to leave, and on your way out, take your shitty condolences with you."

Tara hesitated for a moment, before finally standing up from her seat, and walking out of the clubhouse.

Lena watched as Tara disappeared from her sight. She hadn't noticed that she had grabbed a bottle of gin, until she realized it was shaking uncontrollably in her hand. She quickly felt the itch to just throw the damn thing across the room to let her emotions loose, but instead she poured herself a shot. And for good measure, she poured herself three more.

The clubhouse was now hustling and bustling with patrons, as Lena had expected it to. She was busy, behind the bar, pouring drinks and taking more shots with the members of SAMCRO that had showed up about a half an hour ago. Of course, Jax wasn't with them. At this point, Lena didn't really care.

"How you feelin', baby girl?" Tig asked, sipping his beer bottle, his crystal blue eyes looked at Lena with sympathy.

"I'm feeling better." Lena replied, trying to push down the urge of telling folks to stop asking her that.

"Yeah, Jackie boy was tellin' us you were takin' it pretty hard." Chibs commented, as Lena poured him another shot of whiskey. "Just so you know, SAMCRO –we're here for you, darlin'. Whatever you need."

Tig nodded in agreement, reaching out to pat her hand.

"Thanks boys." Lena gave them a warm smile, this time pouring two more shots. One for Tig and one for herself.

The three of them toasted, before throwing the shot back. Lena winced, feeling the burn of the liquor hitting the back of her throat. She was now definitely starting to feel it, making her body grow warmer. When she looked up she finally saw Jax making his way into the clubhouse and quickly over to her.

"Hey, babe," Lena greeted him.

"Hey." Jax looked at her, and immediately noticed that something was off with her demeanor.

Lena offered him a shot, but he turned it down. She just shrugged and took it herself, receiving much praise from Tig and Chibs.

"How many of those have you had tonight?" Jax questioned, still looking at Lena with concern written in his steely blues. Lena gave him another nonchalant shrug and tossed back another shot. "Maybe you need to slow down a bit."

Lena rolled her eyes annoyed –she was definitely starting to feel it– and poured herself yet another shot. "I'm fine, Jax." She went to toss that one back, before Jax reached out to stop her.

Jax immediately took the shot from her hands and set it down on the bar. "Can we talk?"

Lena sighed heavily, setting the whiskey bottle back on the shelf and giving the bar counter a good wipe. She then quickly dried her hands and made her way around the bar. Jax didn't let Lena's untouched shot go to waste as he downed it for himself and set the shot glass back down on the bar table. He then gave Chib's back a friendly pat and took Lena back to his dorm.

Lena went and sat on the bed, while Jax shut the door behind them. "So, what's up?"

Jax immediately joined her, his jean clad knee brushing against her bare thigh in the short skirt she was wearing. "So," he began, rubbing his hands together, "I got, um, I got some good news today. Abel is officially coming out of the toaster tomorrow and we can finally hold him."

At the mention of Abel, Lena felt a stabbing pain in her chest. It had been a week since she'd last seen him. It was that day, the day she lost her own baby, and hearing Jax telling her that Abel was getting better and that they'd be able to actually hold him, should have been the best news that she needed to hear. And for some reason, it wasn't.

Unfortunately, Lena knew she couldn't let Jax know that "That's great, Jax."

Jax nodded, smiling from ear to ear. "Means he should be coming home real soon."

That was also something that Lena couldn't bear to hear, but she pushed all of those feelings down. "That's wonderful. I'm so happy." She put on a big smile, pulling Jax in for a hug.

When they pulled back, Jax noticed that Lena's smile didn't quite reach her eyes. "Hey," he reached forward to push a curly tendril behind her ear, "you would tell me if you're not okay, right? We just lost a baby, babe, it's okay if you're not."

Lena swallowed thickly, her eyes cascaded down at her trembling hands. She then took a quick glance back up at Jax, as he still looked at her with concern. She couldn't take him looking at her like that. So, she leaned forward and pressed her mouth against his. Jax was caught off guard by the kiss, but quickly melted into it. Lena grabbed the lapels of his kutte and pulled him further toward her. They both fell back on the bed, their mouths still fused together in a tight liplock.

Jax's hand roughly grabbed at Lena's breasts through her top, as their kiss continued to deepen.

Then suddenly the door to the apartment was opened, and the pair immediately pulled apart. Much to Lena's disappointment.

"Hey, man, sorry to interrupt," Opie stood awkwardly by the door, "we got a problem. Mayans."

Jax nodded at his best friend. "Yeah, I'll be out in a minute."

Opie also nodded, shutting the door.

Jax sighed, running a hand through his shaggy hair. "You gonna be okay?" He turned to look at Lena.

"Yeah." Lena told him, not quite making eye contact with her Old Man.

Jax, again, cupping her face in his hands, leaned forward and kissed her lips. He then stood to his feet and headed out of the door.

Lena sat there for a few seconds after Jax had left. All of a sudden, her body was starting to shake, and she felt the tears stinging her eyes. But nipped that in the bud quickly, swallowing it all down. She then ran a hand through her curly locks and stood to her feet. If she was telling people that she was fine, she needed to show it.

Lena awoke the next morning, back at Jax's house. Of course, like always, he wasn't there. When she rolled over, to check her phone, charging on the nightstand, she read the text he'd sent her just after he left. He was requesting that she'd meet him at the hospital later on today so they could be there when Abel officially gets out of his incubator.

Lena sat on the edge of the bed and read the text over and over again. She had contemplated not going. This was definitely going to be hard for her since her emotions were all over the place, and she knew that Abel shouldn't be exposed to that. It wasn't fair to him. But she just decided to fight against it. She needed to. Abel didn't deserve her abandonment. That also wasn't fair to him. It wasn't that innocent baby's fault that she had lost her own. Going to see him is what she needed.

After getting dressed, Lena had made her way into the kitchen to make herself a cup of coffee. As she rummaged through the mess of the cabinets for sugar, something immediately caught her attention. Her brows furrowed, as her fingers brushed against the smooth surface. She wrapped her hand around the thin neck, pulled it out of the cabinet, and finally into her line of vision. Swallowing thickly, she stared at the clear, swishing liquid in the glass bottle, while it stared tauntingly back at her.

Lena figured this must have been left behind from Wendy's secret stash that had been overlooked. She immediately thought about just shoving the bottle right back behind the other crap in the cabinet she got it from and not even think about it. But the ache in her chest caused her to realize how much it was calling out to her to numb her pain.

Without any further thought, Lena dumped her coffee and cup into the sink and grabbed a clean glass from the dishrack instead. Pouring herself a generous amount, she didn't hesitate to swallow the entire thing, feeling the immediate burn as the alcohol hit the back of her throat. When the burning stopped, she went to pour herself another glass full, but was disappointed to find the bottle now empty.

Feeling the ache in chest growing and the guilt resonating in the pit of her stomach, Lena released a deep, mournful sigh. She then tossed the bottle and the glass into the sink, causing them both to nearly shatter. With a shaky hand, she ran it across her sleek ponytail in frustration.

What the hell was going on with me? Lena thought to herself.

After a few moments of trying to catch her bearings, Lena had calmed herself down as much as possible, before grabbing her things and heading out of the house.

Lena pulled her Mustang into the empty visitor's spot in the parking lot at St Thomas. She immediately turned the engine off and made a quick check of herself in the mirror, trying to make herself look as decent as possible. She quickly dabbed some extra concealer under her eyes to cover the dark circles and then made a few swipes of gloss across her full, plump lips. Shoving the items back into her purse, which had been sitting open in the passenger's seat, her eyes landed on something that was lying inside the bag, mocking her. She hesitated, before reaching over and yanking the small, clear object from its confinements.

Lena swallowed the lump in the back of her throat, looking down at the bottle currently in her hands. She hated herself for even having this in her possession, but it was like she wasn't in control of herself when she made a quick stop at the liquor store to pick up the one thing that was starting to help her mask the pain currently clenching in her gut.

Quickly unscrewing the cap, Lena placed the tip of the bottle to her and tipped the bottle back, taking a few desperate swallows. This time she barely even flinched as the clear liquid burned the back of her throat. Once she was satisfied, she twisted the cap back on and shoved the bottle back into her purse.

Lena nearly stumbled out of her car, her equilibrium already a bit compromised. She instantly pulled herself together, wiping the invisible dust from her jeans and resituated the strap of her purse on her shoulder, before making her way into the hospital. She immediately headed toward the NICU, a place that was all too familiar to her now.

Lena had just made it to Abel's room, peeking through the window. She expected to either see Jax or Gemma already inside with the infant, but her heart dropped at the sight before her. Her stomach twisted in knots, and she began to feel bile rising up her throat as she watched Jax's ex happily cradling Abel in her arms.

But this ex wasn't Tara.

"Wendy," Lena choked.

The last time Lena had seen Wendy, she was lying unconscious on Jax's kitchen floor. Wendy was drugged up and strung out. Now, this Wendy looked like a completely different person. She looked happy and healthy and ready to be a mother to Abel.

"Yeah, I was surprised to see her too."

A voice came up behind Lena, startling her. When she turned around, she found Tara, dressed in her white lab coat, approaching her cautiously. It had been less than 24 hours since Lena kicked the good doctor out of the clubhouse, so the tension was still thick between the women. Lena certainly didn't have the time to deal with this ex of her Old Man, but she knew she couldn't have Tara physically removed from here as this was Tara's territory.

Lena rolled eyes, muttering to herself. "Jesus Christ, it's a goddamn trifecta." She then turned back to peer at Wendy, who excitedly bounced Abel in her arms. The jealousy was starting to course through her system. "I thought I told you to stay away from me?"

The good doctor let out a deep sigh, having the actual nerve to come and stand next to Lena at the window. "This is a hospital, Lena. I'm actually employed to be here. And despite what you want, I'm still Abel's doctor." She told her, but kept her attention on Wendy herself.

Lena swallowed thickly, folding her arms across her chest. She was starting to get the itch for that bottle in her purse. She hated this. She really fucking hated this.

Things went quiet between the two women, before Tara cleared her throat, breaking their silence. "Look, maybe you and I should talk about the things you said to me yesterday. I kind of just want to clear the air."

Lena scoffed in irritation, whipping around to face Tara. "No, we don't actually. The air is completely clear with us. I meant everything that I said to you, Tara. I'm done here."

Tara eyed Lena warily, her eyes narrowing directly on Jax's Old Lady. "Have you been drinking this morning?"

Lena let out a small, frustrated groan. She knew she should have just walked away and waited for Jax, but she let herself be baited by Tara. "And why exactly would you say that?"

Tara took another half step toward Lena, holding her clipboard closer to her body. "Well, your speech is a bit slurred. Your eyes are glassy. Pupils dilated. And you smell like a brewery."

Lena pursed her lips together, really not wanting to hear anymore of what Tara was trying to accuse her of. Yes, she had a little bit to drink, but she was a fucking adult going through a lot right now. If she wanted to take the edge off, who was Tara to tell her otherwise. She didn't have to answer to anyone. Especially not Tara. "Look, what I do or don't do is none of your fucking business, alright?"

Tara stood a step back in surprise at Lena's anger. She knew she shouldn't have been surprised, but it still caught her off guard. "Oh, I beg to differ, Lena. You're in a hospital, surrounded by small, sick children. It is my job and my business to make sure that nothing happens to them. Maybe you should sober up, before I let you in there to see Abel."

"Let me?" Lena exclaimed at whatever audacity Tara had just thrown at her. "Oh, honey, you don't run anything around here. Especially not with me. If I want to see Abel, I have every right to. I've been here almost every fucking day since he was born. I am just as much his parent as Jax or Wendy."

Tara shook her head dismissively, walking back up to Lena. "Look, I know that losing your baby was hard on you, but maybe you need to think about things –slow down, before you really hurt yourself, Abel, or even Jax."

Lena went to open her mouth, but was cut off by Jax now approaching them. "Hey, what's going on?" He questioned, flitting his blue eyes between his ex-girlfriend and his Old Lady, sensing the tension coming from them.

The few members of SAMCRO that had arrived along with their VP, followed right behind him. They had stopped shortly when they noticed the two women standing at odds with each other in front of Abel's hospital room. They knew that it wasn't their place to interfere and to just let Jax handle it himself.

Before Lena could tell Jax that everything was fine, Tara, inconveniently, was the first to speak. "Maybe you should ask your girlfriend how much she's had to drink today." She sneered, turning on her heels and walked away, pretending to ignore Bobby, Chibs, and Happy on her way down the hall.

Jax watched Tara disappear, before looking down at Lena, who looked beyond irritated. "The hell is she talking about?"

Lena folded her arms back across her chest, looking down at her shuffling feet. "She's just being a paranoid bitch, Jax. I'm fine."

"Hey," Jax reached out to grab her face in his hands, and she finally looked up at him, "have you been drinking today, Lee?"

Lena threw a humorless laugh Jax's way and pulled back from his grip. Of course he would believe Tara over her. "You know what? I think I'm gonna take off. I know when I'm not needed."

As Lena turned to walk away from her Old Man, he immediately stopped her by gently grabbing her elbow and gently pulling her back toward him. "Lee, you gotta tell me what's going on here. I'm really worried about you."

Lena sighed heavily, turning back to fully face Jax and feeling the tears burning the back of her eyes. "Maybe I'm just a little overwhelmed right now. I just lost your baby, Jax. In which, I'm starting to get the feeling that you don't really give a rat's ass about. Your exes just keep popping up like mole rats, and I'm unsure of how I should be feeling. So, I'm just not even going to bother anymore. I'm gonna let you and Wendy have the time you deserve with your son. I...I just need some space." She told him, and this time she was able to turn to walk away, while ignoring the fact that he was calling out to her.

The moment Lena hit the front steps of the hospital, her heart beat angrily in her chest, and she felt the overwhelming urge to retrieve that bottle from her purse. She immediately thought better of it when she was approached by yet another unwelcomed face.

"And this day just got worse." Lena muttered to herself, before looking over at that unwelcomed face. "Is this what you ATF freaks do in your spare time? Lurk outside of hospitals?"

Federal Agent June Stahl chuckled sarcastically, striding her way up to the stairs, her FBI badge gleaming underneath the California sun, against her thin hip. "I guess you are referring to my former colleague, Agent Josh Kohn." The Agent stood intimidatingly in front of Lena. "Which, by the way, he never made it back to Chicago. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that now would you?"

Lena knew this woman had been in town long before Tara's little friend, Kohn, had shown his face, as the skinny bitch had been going around harassing other Old Ladies . Lena knew it was a matter of time before she was next. Agent Stahl was one of the many unsuccessful feds to come and leave with nothing on SAMCRO. But this time, Lena knew this heffa was back and more determined than ever to take Clay and Jax down.

Lena raised a perfectly arched brow, knowing that if Kohn was forced to leave town, but never made it, Jax definitely had something to do with it. Her Old Man was also determined to make the ATF piece of shit pay for what he did to them. But of course, Lena wasn't going to let Stahl know of her suspicions. She wasn't a rat.

"No," Lena shook her head, "but if anything did happen to that creep, I doubt anyone would miss him. So, good fucking riddance." She stated, trying to walk away.

Agent Stahl immediately stopped Lena, grabbing onto her upper arm. "No need to go anywhere, Miss Daniels. I think you and I should have a little chat."

Lena looked down at Agent Stahl's grip on her arm, similar to when Kohn grabbed her. She quickly snatched herself out of Stahl's hold. "Well, that sucks for you, Agent, because I'm not really in a chatty mood today. Especially with you."

Agent Stahl, again, stood in front of Lena, glaring at her. "Oh, you thought that was an option? I don't think so, sweetheart. You're gonna come down to the station with me, and you and I are gonna have ourselves a nice, long talk."

"I don't have anything to say to you." Lena spat bitterly. "Now, unless you have a warrant, I need to be on my way."

As Lena sidestepped Stahl, she hadn't realized the ATF Agent had spied something suspiciously hanging out of her purse.

"Uh, Miss Daniels," Stahl called out to Lena, causing the young woman to turn around, annoyed, "what's this?" She teasingly tipped over the half drank bottle of vodka that was supposed to have been at the bottom of Lena's bag. "An open container, in what I'm assuming will be in your car. That's kind of illegal. Maybe I should test your blood alcohol level and arrest you with the intent to drive under the influence."

Lena swallowed the lump at the back of her throat, clutching her purse closer to her body. She was fucking screwed. "What do you want from me?"

Agent Stahl smirked at getting her way once again. "A moment of your time. And this," she eyed the bottle again, "this goes away. The decision is yours."

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