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tisthepoetl · 4 years ago

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There are many stressors in a modern day lifestyle.

Usually these include the looming threat of death, the monotony of working for currency that stopped being useful years ago and deer.

There are so, so many stressed people. Made worse by the apocalypse that didn’t happen, the riots that most definitely happened, and the negotiations that have been “in progress” for the last few years.

The amount of rapid budget changes are stressing out some people. The amount of rapid cultural exchange is stressing people out. If you work in any field, any field at all, you are likely to be stressed as all hell.

Eventually, they have to pick someone on the ship to be shown as an expert negotiator. No one is prepared for this. Most of them are middle men, most of them don’t have a clue what they’re supposed to be doing, and all of them are panicking.

So they drew straws. The most important decision of all time is made by dumb luck, and honestly that’s a pretty good metaphor for everything happening right now.

Name someone on their haphazard crew and they will have a conflict of interest. Name one member and they will be grossly under qualified.

America has four ambassadors out of the eight chosen. Not because they’re the most presentable, or the most qualified, or the best possible choice, but because they overpaid for a privilege nobody wanted.

If all of this goes to hell they're getting the blame. And if they get the blame the only plan is to point at whoever was voluntold to be leader and pray for leniency.

Every part of this is a desperate attempt to stall before the actual powers back home have found a way to bullshit having any actual control of things.

It shows.

It really, really shows.

So, who was the unlucky scapegoat for the possible downfall of all of humanity?

If you guessed Samantha who wasn’t supposed to even be on this ship, you would be correct!!

Seriously, she was the back up for someone who was almost conceivably qualified. Sort of, if you squinted and ignored the fact they were only there via nepotism, only to be pulled out once everyone realized they were sacrificial lambs.

And then the replacement was also saved from this bullshit via bribery and blackmail and probably some other third sketchy thing she doesn’t know about.

So, here she is, Samantha who had planned on changing her name before realizing she wasn’t getting out of this. Samantha, the replacement for the replacement who was chosen by a lottery held only for the illusion of equal opportunity.

There are literally billions and billions of people whose lives will be affected by whatever she ends up doing. Countless children, parents, lovers and friends and siblings. All of whom would either die or live by whatever ends up happening.

Luckily, she has one coping mechanism which never fails: Repression!!

So she thinks about literally anything else. Thinks about her favorite song as the ship nears the giant towering shape of the Galactic Senate’s meeting place. Thinks about fluffy dogs as she is led by the hand through walls and portraits and treasures with descriptions she can’t read because there are no translators yet.

Thinks about her mother, thinks about her sibling, thinks about the fact everyone could literally die and it would be her fault, and wow she’s already here.

The meeting place has a mouthful name that she could only pronounce if she managed to dislocate her jaw, grow a new set of teeth, and get a proboscis. Everyone calls it the Meeting Place, because again, there are no working translators, they all have to rely on vague equivalents.

The Meeting Place is a moon sized ship, so incomprehensibly large that any species will be able to fit. It has a dock, and a large empty room with nothing in it except for alien leaders who could slaughter them all at a whim.

There are no chairs. The temperature is set to “Mildly unpleasant but liveable.” Unity and democracy means that everyone is equally uncomfortable, because this exact temperature is workable for most species.

Samantha feels a chill down her spine, both from the cold and the fact that so many of them are glaring at her. She is in the center, her crew is placed too far away to help her, and their borrowed ship is miles away from where they are now.

She prays to the gods she doesn’t believe in and hopes she can stall well enough for the clusterfuck back home to get their shit together.

“H…” she starts eloquently. She tries to refind where the rest of humanity’s first impression was stationed, but her view is blocked by the hundreds of giant aliens. “He..llo?” she finishes.

There’s a click, and she flinches back because what if that’s a weapon. A small cube clatters to the ground in front of her, before popping up and showing a hologram.

She would be visibly impressed, in awe, if it weren’t for the fact she’s half sure these diplomats could take any reaction as an insult.

She wouldn’t be able to explain herself either, it’s too early for any sort of translator to have been made, it’s too early for anything about human body language to be common knowledge.

The crowd surrounding her rustles, fins are raised and noises are made and colors are changed. It means something, probably, but she can’t tell what.

The hologram cube makes a loud, ear splitting sound, like a mix between a flatlining heart in a movie and a fire alarm going off. It snaps her out of her spiraling.

There are two large lines pointing at a screen that is pulsing with the most neon red she’s ever had the unfortunate luck of seeing. She stares at it, and realizes it’s a quiz.

Well, more like a shitty rushed powerpoint. Like something you would make in under an hour for the fun of it.

It says, “What Human Want [Ask],” and she has the sneaking suspicion that whoever made this wasn’t trying very hard. Underneath are barely recognizable butcherings of numbers, listing answers from one to three.

“1. Want hurt. Want no us. Lone want.”

“1nd. Want love. Want share. Want us help.”

“1rd. Want no meet us. Want late meet. Want lone.”

All of it is….confusing to say the least. At this point she doesn’t even know if this is a joke or not.

Then again this wasn’t supposed to be her job, she doesn’t understand them either, and maybe they were genuinely trying here. But then again there are so many of them, they probably have enough resources to make at least a dozen Earths and this meeting took multiple years to take place.

The red that flashed before flashes again, than flashes a disturbingly real fingerprint on top of the answers.

She presses the second one, and wills herself to not regret it immediately. Love, sharing, help, all of that sounds good.

Except what if the help is from humanity? What if their definition of help, share, love is killing everyone ever living and she just doomed it all?? What if it means—

“[Greeting] [Greeting Happy] [Greeting Love] [Greeting Happy Angry Bored] [Greeting (Deragotory)]” a voice drones through a translation of the crowd. Samantha wonders when this will be over, and if she’s going to die of anxiety before that happens.

“[Greeting Small Childish] [Greeting Sad Fear] [Greeting (Endeared)] [Greeting Pain Hurt] [Greeting Love Fear Pain]” it doesn’t stop, running through every risen scale and moving limb to translate some vague approximation.

The aliens have translators. The translators are awful. This is taking so much time, which is good for the mission of stalling and bad for Samantha’s sanity.

“[Species Name (Derogatory)] [Mother (Derogatory)] [Criminal (Deragot—]“ the whole crowd is making noise, some like barks and some like tweets and some like a monster out of hell.

And all of them seem to be arguing? Or insulting each other? Either way it continues on for a long stretch of time with nothing but noisy aliens and a robotic voice reciting nonsense that always ends in “(Derogatory.)”

“[Wrong: Too long.] [Wrong: Too fast.] [Wrong: No word Human.]” The sounds are longer, most of the crowd making them rising and puffing out to be bigger. “[Plea Slow.] [No Word for Our Word.] [New Local Child Pet Ally speak.] [No word for Our Word.]”

Samantha realizes once again, that she should’ve left when she had the chance. And never entered that stupid lottery.

“[I hate every single one of you.] [Stop! The Ally-New-Child-Local may hear.] [You are all stupid [Species Name]]” the noises transition into understandable sentences. “[The small Diplomat-Traveler will be confused. Stop.] [They are doing fine. They will not understand our words.] [When is that useless translator going to update, Myy-Rrr-Pl?]”

Humanity as a whole can only take so much. One human as a whole can only take so much. She is halfway to a mental breakdown, fully confused and honestly she just wants to go home. This is the kind of wonder she would love if she didn’t have to personally deal with the consequences.

So she goes the way of most unqualified, underpaid workers, and gives up. She isn’t going to scream or sabotage anything, but her ability to feel was already warring with the tempting concept of not giving a fuck.

She speaks, for the second time. “I can hear you. And I don’t much appreciate being called a child.”

“[.....]” the crowd is finally silent. She basks in the peace.

“[I told you to stop confusing the Ambassador.] [Shut up Myy-Rrr-Pl. You didn’t even get these made right, we had to make a presentation, that’s how awful you and your tech were.] [It's working now, okay?]” The peace was lovely while it lasted.

“Humanity wants, uh, to not be dead,” she says. “And to not be enslaved either. Or like used as food.”

“[Can you understand it?] [Of course I can, I’m the one who learned the language.] [You barely learned it. You put half that presentation into a free-use translator.]” they keep talking, keep barking, chirping, hissing over her. “[This is a disaster.] [It’s not that bad. My presentation went over well enough.] [Myy-Rrr-Pl shut your beak about that [intercourse (derogatory)] thing.]”

“CAN YOU BE QUIET FOR ONE SECOND??” Samantha shouts above the arguing ambassadors. There is only so much she can tolerate, the noise alone is irritating but the senseless, contextless bickering is unbearable

“This is ridiculous,” she continues. “I don’t even know what’s going on, none of you dropped us an explanation. Why can I suddenly understand you? Who the hell is Meer-er-pull? And what the fuck is going on?”

There is no more translation, and nothing to translate into constant robotic rambling. There is no peace in the silence, just an underlying tension as every alien in the room turns to stare her in the eyes.

She wonders if she’s fucked up, if she’s doomed literally all of humanity because she couldn’t tolerate it all and lashed out. There’s an apology on the tip of her tongue, but she can’t manage to push it out through the indignation and fear.

No one breaks the silence. None of them speak. Samantha’s momentary confidence wavers and she considers making a run for it before realizing there are more of those giant aliens stationed at every exit.

“[....Aumko, I think we may have [intercourse (deragotory)] this beyond fixing.] [Feces (Derogatory) Feces (Derogatory) Feces (Derogatory)—]” Luckily, it doesn’t sound like she’s going to be executed for this. Unluckily, the aliens are just as unprepared as they were, and it wasn’t going to get any less confusing, was it?

“[I told you [Anatomical Feature (Exapserated)] that we should’ve started with a smaller group of diplomats. Instead of a “proper” meeting with everyone involved, we should’ve picked one from each of the 3 species, then gone from there. That would’ve been—]”

“I’m not getting any less confused here!!” Samantha cuts off the alien. “I’m not getting any younger either, I’m sick of your childish bickering, get over it and give me an explanation. Please, for the love of god.”

There’s a moment of pause as the translator spits out a bunch of meaningful white noise. It takes a couple moments before one of the birds speaks up.

“[We should cancel this until another time,] the bird chirps. Which isn’t satisfying, which isn’t an explanation, but hey it does technically fulfill the mission of stalling. And honestly she’s taking any win she can get from this. “[We’ll meet up with one of their diplomats, in a less noisy location. They’ll meet with one ambassador from each of our species.]

“[That doesn’t make sense though!!] [How will we even choose?] [A smaller meeting would be a sign of disrespect, we must show that we don’t view the New-Ally as lesser.]” the noise starts up again immediately.

“[SHUT UP!!]” roars one of the giant bears in a show of irritation that she can relate to on a spiritual level. “[Myy-Rrr-Pl will serve as the [Error: No suitable translation]’s ambassador. I’ll be the second ambassador. The third will be Kss’ta.]

There are ruffled feathers, low growls, no outward arguments but no agreements either.

“[I will quite literally fight anyone who decides to waste my time any further.] the bear is...puffing up? The mane of fur around its neck is puffed up like the pelt of an angry cat. “[Myy-Rrr-Pl is the only one who can even half speak the language, and who has the most context. Even if her presentation was awful.]”

“[I’m going to be there personally to ensure this doesn’t happen a second time. And Kss’Ta is the only one of you [Species Name] [Intercourse (Derogatory)] who doesn’t argue around in circles.”

The crowd is unhappier than ever. The bear speaking sounds done with it all. Samantha is too exhausted to give a shit at this point, and just decides to be glad it’s finally over, for now.

“[Is everyone here agreed with me?”] it flares about the room, ears pinned flat to its head and mane big enough to engulf the whole of its neck. All of the crowd flinches back, no one argues too vehemently, though complaints are muttered.

The bear turns to Samantha. “[You have my apologies for my own behavior, and the behavior of these [Species Name (Derogatory)]. We’ll escort your ship back to your station.]”

Relief hits her in a mix of “it’s finally over,” and “thank fuck no one died.”

Everyone leaves, with the mission sort of accomplished, with the peace talk sort of working, and a compromise no one is happy with. Except for Samantha.

But then she learns she’s the ambassador for humanity again, and a piece of her dies at the revelation.

Humanity’s welcome to the galaxy was chaotic, idiotic, ill prepared, and an overall clusterfuck of literally galactic proportions.

At least no one died.

#the terror of being known #humans are weird

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365days365movies · 4 years ago

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February 24, 2021: Annie Hall (1977) (Part 1)

Well...Woody Allen.

I, uh...OK, look, I could get into the whole Woody Allen thing, but INSTEAD of me doing that, I’ll just say this: look into it. Because there is a LOT on this subject, and it’s controversial as HELL. At the end of the day, I’ll recommend this upcoming series on HBO, and just recommend that you look into it.

Because, uh...yeah, it’s not great. That’s all I’m gonna say, because I need to educate myself on it more as well. Instead, let’s talk for a few seconds about divorcing the art from the artist. But ONLY for a few seconds.

I understand why some of you might be surprised I’m doing this one. Because, again...Woody Allen. But, yeah, I always try to do my best to divorce the art from the artist. Because some people suck, but they still make nice things, or at the very least, things that should be open to interpretation and appreciation.

“Superfreak” is a classic song of 1981, and everybody’s heard at least some of it, but Rick James fuckin’ kidnapped two women and kept them in his basement, WHERE HE TORTURED THEM. Edgar Degas made beautiful paintings of ballet dancers, and was also A MASSIVE ANTI-SEMITE. And before he was (RIGHTFULLY AND JUSTIFIABLY) outed as a roofie-ing piece-o-shit...I grew up with - and genuinely enjoyed - this guy’s comedy.

And you can judge me for this, but...I still think his stand-up was and is genuinely funny, and I still appreciate the cultural impact that The Cosby Show had on society’s perception of African-American families, divorced from the stereotype of the ghetto. Fact of the matter is, works themselves deserve to be separated from the artist who made them. That’s my philosophy, and I’m sticking with it Entirely fine to disagree with me, by the way, I get it.

But in that spirit, I’m watching Annie Hall, despite its creators likely transgressions. After all, this is technically his magnum opus, and it’s a good look into the man himself. And so, with that in mind: Annie Hall! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (1/2)

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Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) is talking directly to us about his outlook on life, and his view on the potential future. He tells half of a joke, then an amusing anecdote, and a bit more until telling us that he’s broke up with Annie, and he’s still thinking about it, trying to figure out exactly where things went wrong. He goes back to the beginning, which is punctuated with flashbacks.

He grew up in Brooklyn in World War II, and a young Alvy (Jonathan Munk) is with his mother (Joan Newman) at the doctor’s. He’s depressed after learning that the universe will one day end after a period of expansion, and is having his first real existential crisis. I had mine around the same age, actually, went I learned that the Earth will one day get swallowed by the sun. And THEN came the realization that I’d be dead by that point. AND THEN came the realization that I’d die one day, and that was a WHOLE NEW crisis to...anyway.

He grew up under the Coney Island rollercoaster according to him (although his analyst says that he exaggerates), and that’s what he blames for his “nervous personality. He’s also got an active imagination, often blurring fantasy and reality. His Dad ran the bumper cars on Coney Island (a place that I’ve never been, but desperately want to go).

He continues on talking about his former schoolmates, and not really that well. While in class, young Alvy kisses a...little girl...ahem. And then, when reprimanded by the teacher, current Alvy notes that he was always...like that...and he also says this to the little girl, and they talk about Freud’s latency period, and Alvy said he never...had...one...that’s uh...that’s fuckin’ SOMETHING, now isn’t it?

OK, well, shoving that forcefully aside as hard as I can, Alvy wonders aloud on where his classmates now, and one of them says this:

This also involves a little girl saying she’s “into leather,” which is...awkward as FUCK, but WE’RE GONNA MOVE THE FUCK ON. Alvy recounts his paranoia, and was so even after he became a famous comedian (which we say after a VERY good joke about qualifying for the army as a hostage). He speaks to a friend, Rob (Tony Roberts) about potential anti-Semitism from a person in a passersby meeting, then heads to meet Annie.

Annie Hall (Diane Keaton) arrives at a movie theater, late and in a bad mood. The two are late to their intended film, argue briefly, then head to another film that they’ve already seen, The Sorrow and the Pity. In line, they’re in front of a man loudly soliloquizing on film, much to Alvy’s annoyance.

Annie and Alvy continue to argue a bit, while Alvy openly berates the casual film critic. In the middle, he talks to the audience about it, only to be followed by the crtiic himself, who also acknowledges the audience! Huh! Anyway, he’s a professor at Columbia, and starts continuing his line speech, this time on the work of Marshall McLuhan, one of the most important early media theorists ever. And then, Alvy brings out Marshall McLuhan (Marshall McLuhan) to debate him on it, only for Alvy to turn to the audience and wish aloud that life could really be like this!

I’m beginning to understand why people like this film. It’s metacontextual before metacontextuality was really a thing in film. It’s a fourth-wall breaking movie in some fantastic ways. But will it still hold its muster after breaking the fourth wall’s become so commonplace? we’ll see, I guess.

After a showing of the film, the two return home, and Alvy tries to initiate sex. But Annie’s not really into it at the moment, and Alvy complains that they used to have sex all the time, and it’s been a while since. So, I guess that retroactively awkward scene at the school was meant to foreshadow Alvy’s high libido, that will probably cause some conflict in the film. Anyway, Annie notes that Alvy once went through something similar with Allison, his first wife. Who’s Allison? Flashback!

Allison Portchnik (Carol Kane) is a graduate student in political science, working for a campaign that Alvy’s about to perform for. He’s nervous, as he’s going on after another comedian. She comforts him by saying that she thought he was cute, and he does well. But we flash-forward to a night after they’re married, shortly after the death of JFK, which Alvy’s obsessing over, entertaining various conspiracy theories.

However, Allison rightly points out that his obsession is simply a way for him to avoid having sex with her, which mirrors the present-day situation him him and Annie. Flash forward TO Alvy and Annie, and there are just lobsters...everywhere, on the floor in their kitchen. After that commotion, they talk about Annie’s past romances.

And by talk about, I mean they LITERALLY WALK THROUGH her memories. And I gotta say...I fuckin’ love this method of storytelling. One of her previous boyfriends is an actor (John Glover), and his over-dramatic prose sickens Alvy. We see a second marriage of Alvy’s to New Yorker writer Robin (Janet Margolin), who’s dragged him to a stuffy high society party of intellectuals that he has no interest in going to. Same her, Alvy. I bet the caviar’s canned.

He tries to initiate sex with her - in the middle of the party, mind you - and she turns him down. later, when they get to it in their apartment, she’s unable to, uh...reach satisfaction. From there, we flash-forward after that marriage ends to a tennis match with Rob, where he meets one of his mutual friends: Annie Hall.

And for the record, Annie’s pretty obviously got a crush on him, and she’s adorable as fuck. Also, that outfit, real talk...that outfit rules. She offers to give Alvy a list, during which he’s quite worried about her driving, but the two still get along well enough. Annie’s an amateur photographer, during a time period where photography is considered a relatively new art form. The two go to her apartment, and share familial anecdotes and personal stories about themselves. And as they talk, we also see a set of subtitles on top of each of them that betray their inner feelings and thoughts.

I do genuinely like the stylings of the movie, goddamn. This conversation leads to Alvy asking her out on a date, although they end up scheduling it after Annie auditions at a nightclub as a singer. And while it doesn’t go great, Alvy tells her she was fantastic, and they share a kiss before they head to dinner. They head to her place afterwards, and we cut to later that night, post-coitus.

And then, we get a flash-forward back to the next day, where the two are at a bookstore, and Alvy speaks on his personal philosophy of life.

I'm obsessed with uh, with death, I think. Big - big subject with me, yeah. I have a very pessimistic view of life. You should know this about me if we're gonna go out. You know, I - I feel that life is - is divided up into the horrible and the miserable. Those are the two categories, you know. The - the horrible would be like, um, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. You know, and the miserable is everyone else. That's - that's - so - so - when you go through life - you should be thankful that you're miserable because you're very lucky to be miserable.

Iiiiinteresting.

Shortly into their relationship, they admit they’re in love (or “lurve”, as Alvy says). She moves in with Alvy, which he initially isn’t the biggest fan of, having been burned in two previous marriages And already, their relationship is showing a few bumps. Alvy’s also always trying to push her to take college classes, while she uses mariuana whenever they have sex, which Alvy doesn’t agree with.

But as they have sex one night, without the marijuana at Alvy’s urging, Annie’s mind wanders - LITERALLY.

This film...this film has a VERY unique style of visual storytelling, and I am HERE for it! Seriously, I genuinely love this method of storytelling and comedy, it’s extremely engaging to me.

Soon enough, Alvy gets an interview to write for a talk show host, which he ABSOLUTELY despises. But in doing so, he decides to go into stand-up for himself, and is actually quite successful at it! But before we get to that, we’re at the halfway point! See you in Part 2!

#annie hall #woody allen #diane keaton #tony roberts #carol kane #paul simon #shelley duvall #christopher walken #romance february #romance movie #romcom #romantic comedy #user365 #365 movie challenge #365 movies 365 days #365 Days 365 Movies #365 movies a year

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travllingbunny · 4 years ago

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The 100 rewatch: 5x04 Pandora’s Box

Another excellent episode, maybe a little less action-packed than Sleeping Giants but still fast, full of tension, new information, and many warm reunions and nice character moments - which are important to see before all these characters start having conflicts and many of these relationships get strained to the point of almost breaking later in the season.

This one picks up immediately after the last scenes of both 5x02 (the bunker - cliffhanger with Kane as one of the fighters in the pit) and 5x03 (Eden with Bellamy, Clarke and the prisoners after Bellamy has negotiated with Diyoza, Raven and Murphy on Eligius 4), brings everyone together*, as the prisoners open the bunker and Wonkru finally gets out - and ends with the conflict that means that war between Wonkru and the Eligius prisoners is imminent. The Pandora’s Box has been opened, to use another one of Bellamy’s Greek mythology references. (Oddly enough, he makes that reference in the next episode, not in this one.)

(*Well, not everyone - Monty, Harper, Emori, Echo and Madi are MIA this episode. hiding somewhere in Eden, before they also reunite with the rest of Spacekru plus Clarke plus Wonkru in the next episode.)

If I hadn’t seen season 5 before, I’d be thinking “Will this be the best season of the show?” It is by far the season with the strongest beginning - before the plot starts to drag, building conflicts within both camps. so that war would not happen until the two-part finale. Strong beginning, strong ending, poor middle part.

After the epic Bellarke scene at the end of 5x03, this episode delivers their actual reunion, with another one of those incredibly intimate and intense hugs that Bellamy and Clarke are known for. They tend to grow in intensity, and I’ll just say this: when Tumblr flagged gifs of this hug as “explicit”, well - for once I could see why poor Tumblr bots were getting confused:

A reunion after 6 years, during which Bellamy believed Clarke to be dead, while Clarke didn’t know if Bellamy was alive but still called him on the radio and talked to him every day for 2199 days, has to be pretty epic, and this scene delivers. It seems almost like Clarke - who had been badly tortured - wasn’t entirely sure if that was really Bellamy who emerged out of the darkness to save her, of if she was imagining it, with the way she says “You are really here!”, while crying out of happiness. The intimacy in the body language and the way they look at each other is also reflected in Clarke telling him “And now you’re home!” This goes way beyond how platonic partners and non-romantic best friends interact with each other. The scene is not just acted but directed and shot in such a way that anyone who would see it without knowing Clarke and Bellamy’s actual relationship status, would get the wrong (?) idea. For a moment, they even look like people who have been caught making out, like they don’t want these strangers to witness such an intimate moment.

Even if she did not see this scene in particular, it’s no surprise that Diyoza assumed Clarke and Bellamy were a couple (“the hostage taker and his girlfriend”) after what she saw of their interactions. Really, who wouldn’t?

Bellamy quickly updates Clarke on how everyone is - Madi, Spacekru, acknowledges that Clarke has saved them all (something multiple people do in this early part of the season) and that all of the people who went to space are safe. (”Murphy, Monty, Raven?” “Echo and Emori”. - But why the Harper erasure? This is one of the very few lines in this episode that feel wrong. She’ one of the Delinquents both of them have known since they landed on Earth and Clarke would logically care about her more than Echo, who, she barely knew and who was her enemy 90% of the time. )

Another beautiful reunion happens by radio - Murphy and Raven learn that Clarke is alive. Murphy smiles the moment he hears her voice, and Raven, teary-eyed, thanks Clarke for saving their lives. The Spacekru have been criticized a lot in the fandom for not appreciating Clarke’s sacrifice, but it has to be said that, right after they learned she was alive, they all acknowledged it and expressed gratitude. (Some of them were just later angry at her and not so ready to try to understand her perspective after living isolated for 6 years.) This is one of the very few moments of happiness in season 5 (whenever I see that screenshot of Clarke and Bellamy’s big smiles, I mistake it for a moment for a BTS photo. That’s how rare it is to see characters looking happy on the actual show.)

…………………….

Meanwhile, over in the bunker, no one is happy. and everything is dark, sad and disturbing. Octavia is full Blodreina and acting like a Roman Emperor, deciding if gladiators get to earn their freedom or not. because even being “the last” doesn’t necessarily earn you freedom now - it all comes down to the Queen’s whim. Kane is forced to fight in the pit again tomorrow. I suppose they already have the next batch of fighters ready - it would be a bit weird if she expected a bunch of new “crimes” tomorrow. But things must have gotten progressively worse if they’re now having death matches every day. If they had been condemning people to the pits at that pace throughout those 6 years, even more than 1/3 of the Wonkru would be dead.

One thing I had not noticed before - there is a singer, singing an anthem or ceremonial song before the fights start, and it is the same woman who sang the Coalition anthem in 3x03. This somewhat changes my views of the way Grounder clans chose 100 people to survive the bunker. At least one of the clans was smart enough to include a musician, rather than a bunch of warriors. There should have been even more musicians and other entertainers (you’d expect a culture like Grounders to have some sort of epic poetry!), as that would’ve helped the life in the bunker much more than warriors (and there could have been entertainment that does not include killing). But this was probably an exception, because this person probably had a high status as a ceremonial singer.

Our first look at Abby after the time jump - and she is obviously in a bad state and pill-addicted, and both she and Kane look tired and worn down. He is protecting her and taking the guilt for her crime - stealing pills, since Abby is obviously in no state to fight - and on her part, Abby wants to confess and spare him. But Indra - who has been helping them and is clearly unhappy with the way Blodreina is ruling - is more rational and knows Kane winning is the only way to save them both. Kane, however, is choosing to take a stand and refuse to fight.

Kane and Abby got a lot of flak from the fandom and were accused of hypocrisy for their attitude to Octavia later in the season - with the argument that Abby was the one who persuaded Octavia to go through with cannibalism and killing people for refusing to ear, and that Kane knew Abby’s role in it but blamed Octavia. All these arguments presume that they were blaming Octavia for the cannibalism and everything else that happened the Dark Year. But in fact, there’s zero indication that this is what they blamed her for, and it’s pretty clear that the reason why they - and others - have issues with Blodreina is that she’s been ruling by fear and throwing people into fighting pits for all sorts of reasons, and generally being a scary tyrant/leader of a cult of death and violence. Yes, as we learn later, Abby was a crucial part of how Octavia turned into that person, but that doesn’t change the fact that she is that person now, that she has absolute power in the bunker, and people have been living in fear of her.

Kane tries to plead with Octavia when she comes to tell him he has to fight, and at this point, he seems to still believe she could change and start making better decisions. What feels a bit off to me is that he says he’s been silent for too long - this can’t be the first time he’s tried to change her mind? He would have probably had a lot more chance to succeed if he tried much earlier. We get the first mention of the infamous “Dark Year” (this is also the episode where we first hear “All of me for all of us”) and see Octavia getting upset at its very mention (a reveal will be dragged out for 6 more episodes). It’s interesting that Jaha and Kane both mentioned Aurora Blake’s fate in their speeches to Octavia, but they used it to say completely different things. Jaha was saying that this is what you have to do, execute everyone who is the “enemy” because they endanger your survival in any way, even if it’s having one more child. Kane was saying that’s what they shouldn’t be doing anymore, she shouldn’t be doing what they did on the Ark, but do better. Octavia ended up taking Jaha’s advice, which shaped her as leader, for better or worse. (Mostly worse, IMO.) She could have maybe taken Kane’s advice years ago, but now it’s clearly too late.

If anything, Kane’s refusal to fight makes her more determined than ever to break him - she doesn’t want to condemn him to death, she wants to break his resistance and his stubborn insistence on morality. I don’t approve of all of Kane’s later actions in season 5, but it’s really not hard to see why, after these experiences and everything in the bunker, he thought Blodreina’s rule was the worst thing that could happen.

And then - like a Deus ex machina, the bunker door opens and Bellamy is literally coming down from above, into the darkness of Octavia’s underground realm, as the savior, bathed in light, It’s the second episode in a row where he comes as a Big Damn Hero in almost dreamlike scene, from a POV of a woman in his life, this time his sister. For a moment, Blodreina is Octavia again and hugs her brother. Clarke comes down a moment later (but she is not bathed in light - she looks at the Blake siblings from the shadows.)

Instead of hugging, Clarke and Octavia greet each other with a forearm handshake - which is quite an interesting choice, particularly since (thanks @jeanie205) this is apparently a type of greeting associated with Roman generals greeting each other. (But only in Hollywood movies, It wasn’t a thing in actual Roman history.)

In addition to all the reunions, some characters meet for the first time - such as Octavia and Diyoza, who are about to become rival leaders on two sides of the war. Who could have known what their relationship would turn into in season 6 and season 7?

I love the way that everyone - Bellamy, Clarke, Diyoza and the rest of the prisoners - have the “WTF is this” look when they see the fighting pit (which is all covered in blood - apparently, they don’t wash it. It’s an aesthetic, I guess.) Bellamy soon asks Octavia what the heck she’s doing (and guesses exactly what inspired her: “Someone must have read Ovid one too many times). It’s an experience she hasn’t had in years - to have her decisions questioned by someone who’s not one of her subjects and not afraid of her.

More reunions follow: Clarke and Abby, Bellamy and Miller (another relationship that will turn sour in the rest of the season), Clarke and Kane.

Meanwhile, on Eligius 4, Raven finds more info about Diyoza backstory - Colonel Diyoza was "something called Navy SEAL" (it makes sense that Arkers wouldn’t know about such things), decorated for valor three times, before turning into a rebel/terrorist, and leader of a movement called United Liberation Army. As we see in these articles, civilians died in these attacks, which is something Diyoza regrets in season 7 - even if her cause was right, her means were wrong.

Raven and Murphy have some fun playing soccer, but they’re also worried about the fact they may need to murder 283 people. Raven finds it hard, so Murphy offers to do it to spare her. It’s typical for their relationship that Murphy tends to see Raven as someone better and more moral than himself (in spite of the fact that she once tried to sacrifice him instead of Fin), while Raven often says disparaging things about him, even though she is fond of him.

One thing I found a bit odd that Murphy at one point says: “Why do you have to always be the one to sacrifice?” - even though this was just the second time Raven has decided to sacrifice herself, and he wasn’t even around for the first time - trying to blow the bridge in 1x10. But Murphy seems to have a somewhat idealized view of Raven, driven by his guilt over crippling her and his self-loathing. Or maybe he meant the others in the group in general. as he sees himself as the selfish cockroach as opposed to them. (Note: I initially wrote this in my 5x03 review, before I realized it was actually said in this episode. That’s what happens when you finalize posts after having seen two episodes ahead.)

Raven and her future love interest Shaw try to outsmart each other in hacking (Raven even kind of flips a bird at Shaw at one point - it’s like they are having a digital meet cute without having even met.)

But when Diyoza finds a way to outsmart Spacekru by suffocating Raven and Murphy - Raven tells Murphy to pull the lever (usually Clarke’s job) and kill the prisoners; and when he hesitates, she goes into her fierce/ruthless mode and goes “Fine, I’ll do it”, before Murphy comes up with the smart solution that prioritizes survival and also doesn’t include mass murder - a win-win, except it also takes away Bellamy’s leverage.

I wonder where the standoff between Wonkru and the Eligius prisoners would have led after Diyoza took Abby and Kane with her and announced her people were taking over Eden? Would war still have been inevitable? I can’t see Octavia giving up on Eden so easily. In any case, the war here was started by an idiot who shot an incredibly destructive weapon at Octavia just because her arrogant Blodreina grin pissed her off. (This guy, called Szybunka, is a part of McCreary’s faction, and here we first learn that they are preparing a rebellion against Diyoza, though McCreary thinks it’s still not time for it.)

A lot more deaths were prevented by Shaw, Major props for him in this episode both for that, and because he is the first person to finally make the point that there are so few people left of the human race and that it is incredibly stupid to kill more of them

Octavia immediately blames Bellamy for everything - even though he was the reason why she and Wonkru got out of the bunker instead of being stuck there forever/ And this time, I’m sure this was 100% meant to highlight that she has a habit of unfairly placing blame on Bellamy whenever something goes wrong in her life.

Body count: I haven’t been doing these for a while, but now I’m doing the body count for the entire season 5 so far:

Wonkru - we learn in this episode that, out of the 1200 people in the bunker, there are 814 remaining. So, 386 - almost a third - died during those 6 years. That includes 3 people who died in the fighting pit. An additional Wonkru member is killed by the idiot Szybunka while protecting Octavia, leaving 813.

Eligius prisoners - two of the party on Earth were killed by Madi and Clarke in 5x01, Four more were killed in 5x03 - one shot by Clarke, another one mercy killed by Diyoza after getting into one of Clarke’s traps, two more shot by Madi to save Bellamy, Monty, Harper, Emori and Echo. On the ship, Kodiak, the big guy Diyoza activated as a weapon (”activate Kodiak!”) was killed in self-defense by Bellamy with help from Echo and Raven. And in 5x04, Szybunka is killed by McCreary for his stupidity. This leaves 282 prisoners on the ship and an unknown smaller number on Earth.

Rating: 8/10

#the 100 #the 100 season 5 #the 100 rewatch #pandora's box #the 100 5x04 #bellamy blake #octavia blake #clarke griffin #charmaine diyoza #marcus kane #abby griffin #raven reyes #john murphy #bellarke #indra #indra kom trikru

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ilistenedin · 4 years ago

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1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Soda cans

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Lollipops

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Bubblegum

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Smart but lazy.

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

Soda cans

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

Tomboy

7. earbuds or headphones?

No preference

8. movies or tv shows?

Movies

9. favorite smell in the summer?

Fresh cut grass or when it’s about to rain

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

Basketball in elementary, dodgeball in middle, and sitting in high school

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

Nothing

12. name of your favorite playlist?

I don’t have one

13. lanyard or key ring?

Both

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

I don’t think I have a favorite candy tbh. I don’t do sweets often. Starburst are alright?

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

La Casa de los Espíritus

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Knees apart, ankles crossed

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

Birkenstock’s, baby

18. ideal weather?

If staying indoors; rainy and gloomy and cold.

If going out; cold with lots of clouds where the sun occasionally peeks thru

19. sleeping position?

On stomach, hugging pillow, one leg hiked up

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Lately, in my notes app.

21. obsession from childhood?

Sharks. Horror. Cats.

22. role model?

I don’t really have one. But I do hold a special place in my heart for Gerard Way.

23. strange habits?

I don’t think I have any strange habits. I’m pretty boring.

24. favorite crystal?

Amerhysts, opal, moonstone

25. first song you remember hearing?

I have bad memory

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Stay indoors lol

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

Just be outside. Maybe go chill in a park and drink some tea and smoke a cigarette/joint

28. five songs to describe you?

I don’t have the brain capacity for that rn.

29. best way to bond with you?

Interests. Asking questions.

30. places that you find sacred?

Book stores.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

I don’t lol

32. top five favorite vines?

Oh god I don’t know lol. I love the “Adam!” one. “Two dudes chilling in a hot tub..” the one where the girl is about to play Mozart and the keyboard is on the wrong mode. And I can’t think of any other ones rn

33. most used phrase in your phone?

Probably lol

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

Oreilly auto parts for sure.

35. average time you fall asleep?

It varies way too much

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

Probably the forever alone dude

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Duffel bag

38. lemonade or tea?

Tea

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Lemon cake

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Ummm weird is a choice of word I guess. My sophomore year some poor girls home made sex video w her bf got leaked and it was pretty fucking bad.

41. last person you texted?

Lauryn

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

Pants

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

I am incapable of choosing. I’m a slut for all of them.

44. favorite scent for soap?

I like mint, citrus, patchouli, and lavender

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Tie between sci-fi and fantasy

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Sports bra and boxers

47. favorite type of cheese?

It’s impossible for me to choose. I’ve never met a cheese I didn’t like.

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

My friends used to call me Apple in HS so I guess an apple

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

None

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

I laugh hard too often

51. current stresses?

My life as a whole

52. favorite font?

Times new Roman

53. what is the current state of your hands?

I’ve stopped biting my nails and instead I file them (I wonder how long that’ll last) and they are a bit dry cause of the changing of seasons; this always happens. They get like, cracked and peely. It’s gross, don’t judge.

54. what did you learn from your first job?

How to drive stick shift. I was a valet.

55. favorite fairy tale?

I don’t think I have one tbh

56. favorite tradition?

Every year for my grandmothers birthday and death anniversary we go out to this famous church that over looks the Miami Bay Area and we throw sunflowers into the ocean for her. I’m not religious or anything, but the church location is great and it’s extremely important in my culture (Cuban).

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

I haven’t overcome shit

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

I don’t think I have any talents per se. I used to drum. I have been told I can sing. I like to write. I doodle.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“Sorry, can’t help it, I’m gay”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Horror

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

Brain too tired to think of anything

62. seven characters you relate to?

I’m too tired to think lol

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Bad Bunny’s discography.

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Lol. Rotten dot com

65. any permanent scars?

One on my knee.

66. favorite flower(s)?

Peonies and roses and pansies

67. good luck charms?

I have un azabache on my wrist

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Don’t like cucumbers or raw carrots. Oh and recently I tried pickles that have been pickled in moonshine. Fucking no.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Head empty

70. left or right handed?

Right

71. least favorite pattern?

My patterns in my love life 😁

72. worst subject?

Math for sure

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

Idk. I will literally put an egg on everything.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

No idea

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Mashed probably

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

Succulent

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Publix has decent sushi

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

I don’t have a school I’d anymore, but it was pretty fucking bad. But my license one is also pretty fucking bad.

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Earth tones

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Aren’t they the same? I call them cocuyos

82. pc or console?

Console

83. writing or drawing?

Writing

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medialit-posting · 4 years ago

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"My stand about Plagiarism, Piracy Bias Media, and the like.."

NEW BLOG CONTENT AHEAD!!!

We are living in a world where almost everything are readily accessible for all of us. We can easily research almost every information we desire and needed, we can download everything on the Internet; movies? games? music? name it! News and media information are readily available online, from journalistic article, news, blogs literally EVERYTHING is on the Internet and available online... Moreover we also have the presence of new and traditional media to satiate our endless needs. However, this usage lf Internet has its pros and cons. Various issues surfaced online, now I am going tp share to you my stand about my stand about Plagiarism, Piracy Bias Media, and the like... which are mostly issues surfaced in the digital world.

MY STAND ABOUT PLAGIARISM...

Plagiarism is known as the theft and dissemination of other people's words and ideas, if a person commits to this kind of crime he or she uses other people's words and ideas as if itvis theirs. Plagiarism is a heinous offence. It normally earns you an F on your work at the university level. Or if your university is stricy enough you're not able to graduate or finish the course that you're currently taking which would cause to give you a bad reputation or worse a bad life. Given that a student can also get thrown out of the institution if he or she plagiarizes repeatedly, one must avoid in doing or committing this kind of offensive violations. The punishments sanctions and the like, varies from the university or institution that you're part with or the violator's.

Why is plagiarism prevalent across universities? Some of them are linked to the way we access information. Don't you know a question answer? Just google it! Just google it! So we are a little like the dogs of Pavlov. The way we study, the same behaviour. In high school, students sometimes don't have ample research skills and instead look at anything online. This googling culture has a negative influence on the self-confidence of students. Students start most assignments by hearing what others have to suggest rather than thinking about themselves. As a business, we have a responsibility to empower students to feel assured that they can be great critical thinkers. Only thus will plagiarism be treated correctly. If a person is caught plagiarizing, his or her reputation is definitely tarnished and that person might lose their work. We all should obey the law just because we are just avoiding ourselves in getting caught. If we value original thought, personal integrity, and scholarly research, then we will naturally want to avoid plagiarism. That’s why it’s important to cite your sources and know how to integrate quotations properly. But if you only aim to be stop being caught, you're in great danger because you need to follow the law already. You would of course want to stop plagiarism if you respect original thinking, personal integrity and scientific evidence. Therefore, it is necessary to quote your sources and to know how to properly incorporate quotes.

Links for pictures :https://copyleaks.com/blog/how-do-plagiarism-detectors-work/

https://sundial.csun.edu/138189/opinions/the-heightened-use-of-plagiarized-essay-services/

Due to what was discussed above, one might think they would never commit to this kind of crime or act (Plagiarism). Unfortunately, to some or most people who commit to this kind of crime they have a lot of reasons. Here are the possible reasons or factors as to why some good workers and students sometimes plagiarize :

Panic of the last minute

Feels of insufficiency

Incomprehension of what plagiarism is

Note slippery

Copying ideas blindly, often in the same order

Work on a job and handing out similar documents

Quotations from the bibliography, but not from the paper

Yet ignorance is no excuse even when plagiarism is unintentional and unintentional. You must quote your own sources and argue.

From the discussion above, now I can conclude that I myself, all of us should stand AGAINST plagiarism. There are a lot of ways to fight and avoid committing such offensive act. We can always paraphrase, put references and include citations or quotations. Together let's stand AGAINST plagiarism and the people who commit such acts.

MY STAND ABOUT PIRACY...

If a person has a limited knowledge, he or she might say thay piracy only happens in the confines of the Earth's ocean. If you're this person then you need help- you have to be aware and be knowledgeable about the fact that piracy doesn't take place in the sea or ocean - it happens everyday in our lives, in business world, media and most especially it happens online. We love free items right? I mean who would want to spend money on things that we can get for free. However, this kind of mentality might lead us to doing illegal activities such as piracy without even knowing it. According to economic times the definition of piracy is that "Piracy refers to the unauthorized duplication of copyrighted content that is then sold at substantially lower prices in the 'grey' market. The ease of access to technology has meant that over the years, piracy has become more rampant. For example, CD writers are available off the shelf at very low prices, making music piracy a simple affair." There have been several regulations to prohibit secrecy. Internationally, piracy laws are strict and punitive in nature in developing countries. It does not gain attention nationally in Asian countries, and more in India too, because of more engaging topics. However, the industry has been involved in stemming red, in particular IT and music industry. These organisations identify music piracy outlets and then carry out police raids. However, there are few convictions and the punishment is not sufficiently harsh to discourage.

Link for the picture https://haulixdaily.com/2019/02/piracy-access-2019

Video pirates, cable piracy and DVD/CD piracy are achieved in several different ways. The film is made by a video-cassette without the correct permission of the right holder - i.e. producer. Video piracy takes place. Film producers also sell video rights to another group, who makes video cassettes for sale or loaning (typically after six weeks of release in theatres). The on sale video cassettes are only intended for home views. Cable piracy applies to illegal cable network transmission of films. Films, in particular new releases, are often seen via cable without the rights holder's permission. Piracy in satellite channels is an unusual occurrence, since they are structured and do not usually screen movies without purchasing right. Music piracy involves the illegal reuse of music cassettes, which flood the market until a new release is released. The sales of music companies hit hard by the influx of pirated compact disks and cassettes, as they are in store at considerably lower prices. In the foreign market there is DVD/VCD piracy of Indian films. The prints sent for film screening abroad are usually pirated at any airport in the Middle East. Prints of DVD/VCD are able to be sent to Pakistan. Such prints can also travel from Pakistan to Nepal and come by land to the country.

link for the picture https://variety.com/2018/digital/news/piracy-survey-illegal-content-muso-1202829757/amp/

From the discussion given above, I conclude that me and you ; all of us should stand against piracy. Although we get to consume media products for a lower price or some are even free we should remember that the people behind these media products worked really hard fro their movies, songs or music etc. to get produced... We should enable and let humanity win against "practicality". Therefore I encourage everyone to stand AGAINST piracy and against the people who continues to commit this kind of crime.

MY STAND ABOUT BIAS MEDIA AND THE LIKE...

As time continues to pass by, our technology continues to get advance. However, the presence of traditional media is still very much alive and kicking as to this industry continues its best to be in the competition. We continue to use simultaneously the media products offered by both new and traditional media... Now the concern is are we really keen enough in making sure that what media products we consume are not biased? How do I stand in this issue and the like (other related issues regarding media bias, piracy and plagiarism.)

According to lumen learning media bias "Media bias is the bias of journalists and news producers in the selection of events and stories that are reported, and how they are covered." addition to thay according to them "The term “media bias” implies a pervasive or widespread bias contravening the standards of journalism, rather than the perspective of an individual journalist or article. The direction and degree of media bias in various countries is widely disputed." From this we can say that not all information presented in the media are the information that we have to believe to. We should not let ourselves be spoofed by these journalists, television programmers, broadcasters, writers etc. we should take time to analyze and even fact check the information that we have received. Information that you might have read online, heard on the radio, or even the news you watch on your favourite channel. We should analyze and think if the information or news is biased or not.

link for the picture https://dailybruin.com/2019/05/09/the-quad-media-coverage-skewed-by-biases-of-journalists-american-society

"Practical limitations to media neutrality include the inability of journalists to report all available stories and facts, and the requirement that selected facts be linked into a coherent narrative. Because it is impossible to report everything, selectivity is inevitable. Government influence, including overt and covert censorship, biases the media in some countries, for example North Korea and Burma. Market forces that result in a biased presentation include the ownership of the news source, concentration of media ownership, the selection of staff, the preferences of an intended audience, and pressure from advertisers." (Candela, 2019). This is true and is happening in our country, based on what my teacher have said the a television channel is so biased in reporting, writing and heading of news towards the president and the government in general. She also stated how this channel has been violating laws in paying tax that's why it was forced to shutdown from giving its services. Since, I think highly of my teacher I think she really has a point and one might think that the closure of the said station if for everyone's good. We should not tomerate media bias, just like what happened to a certain news channel we should take action if we can to fight media bias.

link for the picture https://thecord.ca/how-media-bias-effects-reader-perception/

There is an attempt to correct bias; the round table is a method used to prevent bias, in which members of opposing viewpoints comment on an issue. This approach allows different viewpoints to be expressed in the media in principle. The organizer of the report is also responsible, however, for selecting people who really represent the broad opinion, for asking non-detrimental questions and fairly editing and arbitrating their statements. A point/counterpoint may be as unjust as a simple biased article if done carelessly, implying that the losing party has lost its merits.

The disclosure of affiliations which can be viewed as a potential conflict of interest is another tactic used to prevent partialism. This is particularly obvious when a news outlet publishes a story that is important to the news organization or its owners or conglomerates. The laws or regulations regulating stocks and shares typically include this divulgation. Commentators on stock news stories are also compelled in these companies or in their rivals to reveal their ownership interests.

Overall what is my standing towards media bias (piracy and plagiarism) and the like... well just like what I have said in the previous paragraphs together we should stand AGAINST media bias, piracy, plagiarism and the like because it is the right thing to do. We should eradicate toxicity and evil in our world whether its digital or not. It is our jobs as human beings to spread humanity whether it is online or not, we should always consider going against issues like this so that slowly but surely we can change the world the we are currently live on for the future generations and for the betterment of all human beings.

REFERENCES :

https://natureofwriting.com/courses/essay-writing/lessons/doing-research-2/topic/plagiarism/

https://courses.lumenlearning.com/boundless-politicalscience/chapter/media-bias/

https://m.economictimes.com/definition/piracy

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sanders-specs · 5 years ago

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Patton’s Playlist Analysis

A/N: I’m back again with Patton’s playlist analysis!

So this is definitely my favorite playlist. I know at this point both Logan’s and Virgil’s have come out, and i still just like Patton's the best, and honestly i think this analysis reflects that. It’s also very long, so I apologize for that. And again, disclaimer: This is entirely my own opinions. I’m not trying to speak for Thomas or Joan or anyone else who helped put together the playlist. it’s okay if you don’t agree with me! In fact, I’d like to hear your thoughts if you don’t!!

It does go song by song, like with Roman’s, so you can divide it up if you want. but for those who don’t want to/can’t read an analysis of 20 songs, I’ll put the summary above the cut and those who want to dive deeper can enjoy.

Let me know if you want to see Logan’s!

Roman’s Analysis

Analysis summary/conclusion(?):

Patton is a bright, bubbly optimist. he sees the best in everyone and in the entire world. He believes in kindness and love and wants to make the world a better place with it.

But he also wants to be loved and feel loved. By the other sides, by Thomas’s friends and family, romantically. He craves that affection and attention almost as much as Roman does. He wants so badly to help (like with Virgil), but he feels like he doesn’t quite do enough.

Still, though, he’s determined to spread that love and kindness, even if he doesn’t get much in return for it.

Like with Roman’s we’re going to start with the first song sooo here we go!

Camp Fire Song Song.

None of us should be surprised and honestly, I had forgotten Patton’s answer to the favorite song question in the Q&A video until I hit play on the playlist.

There’s not too much to analyze here. It’s a really short song with only a few lyrics (if also iconic).

Honestly, though, listening to it for analyzing purposes, it reminded me of Learning New Things, when Patton and the others were trying to get Logan to sing along with them and join in on the bit. Also, in the Christmas episode when Patton and Roman are trying to get Virgil to sing his line with them. Squidward being a good representation of both of them in the moment in their respective videos.

After all, Spongebob and Patrick were just trying to have a little fun, and they wanted Squidward to join in, even if it was obvious that he didn’t want to. Still, though, Spongebob wasn’t deterred by his silence. He just kept going and having fun.

Patton’s a bit of the same way. Even though he wants the others to join him in his ideas of fun, they don’t always do. Still, though, Patton keeps trying and smiling through it all and having his own fun. Making puppet puns, doing impressions, mixing up the way he was singing his part in the twelve days of Christmas. he has his own fun, even when the others don’t really participate but you know…

It’ll help if you just sing along

Turnaround is so cute. I haven’t watched The Little Prince, but if the whole soundtrack is as good as this song then I just might.

This song, like many on Patton’s playlist, is about living life and enjoying the good things. Everything from the lyrics to the happy-go-lucky music to the scat singing just has a tone of optimism and happiness.

Straight (Straight), how can you be so straight? (Straight) Life is everything but straight (Straight) It's going up and down

Life has its ups and downs, so you shouldn’t be so focused on one path or one plan. Not everything is going to go right, sure, but there are so many things that will. Focusing too much on making things go the way you want them to will prevent you from learning and living life how it’s supposed to be lived.

Far (Far) Happiness isn't far (Far) Not far from where you are (Are)

A lot of people live like their looking for happiness, when in reality if they stopped looking, they’d find they would be much happier.

Now, of course I can’t speak for everyone or their situations. In this particular instance, I’m talking about the people who go through life thinking “as long as I do/have/accomplish this then I’ll be happy” when they already have so much or have people around them that could give them the happiness that they want so badly.

It goes well with the Growing Up video. What Patton was trying to tell the others all along, and what the ultimate conclusion of the video was. Happiness isn’t far.

Watching your life go by (By, by by) Now, why don't you sing out loud? The tune you keep inside?

Really most of this song is saying to enjoy the now. Who you are, what you like, the person that you are. Not to hide yourself.

Shy (Shy) How can you be so shy? (Shy) Hiding below the stars (Stars) Under your neon light (Light) Hi (Hi) Don't say hello, say hi (Hi) Hi to a higher sky (Sky) Hi to a higher ground Loud, why don't you sing out loud? The words you keep inside?

Listening to this verse in the context of Patton is super interesting to me. We all know those people who are all “Just be happy! You’re alive, the sun is out, what else could you need?” While I don’t really think Patton is too in that category, he’s up there. He loves rainbows and sunshine and everything about life (see: his verse in Recipe for Me). He’s excited-able and very Maira-running-through-the-hills-singing-about-how-the-hills-are-alive-with-the-sound-of-music.

All that being said, comparing this to, say Virgil, who is arguably the polar opposite is interesting. Patton being the way he is, really doesn’t understand being shy or social anxious. Of course he would want you to sing out loud! Why would you want to hold that in when you can just let it all out and have fun with it? He’s much more likely to give a stranger a hug than he is to duck his head and look the other way.

But he doesn’t want you to just suddenly change. He wants to help! The very first lyric of the song says just that.

Turn around, I’m right behind you

He’s there, he’s with you, he’s going to help you break out of your shell and be free. He wants you to turn your views of life around to be as happy as you can be.

All of the songs on this playlist are super chill and it’s really nice. Jim Croce has such a nice voice which makes I Got a Name just really nice to listen to. Also, the music itself is amazing (I’m huge on aesthetically pleasing things, especially in songs so I have to gush. There will be a lot of that in this one).

This one goes along with Turnaround a bit in the sense that it’s about living. Moving through life like you move easily (in…some places) down a highway.

Like the pine trees lining the winding road I got a name, I got a name Like the singing bird and the croaking toad I got a name, I got a name

Everything in the world has a name, a title, something that we call it by. If it doesn’t, we give them one. It’s part of just being alive on this earth, having a name. In so many cultures, names are some of the most important things. They mean things, for some, they define who they are. Honestly, look into why we have middle names, or all the different titles the Greeks have for love, or why Queen Elizabeth had to full on change her name when she became queen.

Maybe I’m just song analyzing at this point instead of putting it to Patton Context or heck, maybe I’m just taking the lyrics too literally. But, I mean, he is the side who cares the most about….everything. Thomas is an incredibly caring person and all of that is Patton. He’s the one who would have names for every single toy he has, because names are important, everyone has to have a name! it’s something he would care about.

Movin' me down the highway, rollin' me down the highway Movin' ahead so life won't pass me by

I find this…ironic. I don’t know if it’s meant to be, honestly. But when you’re on the highway you are…literally rolling past life. The trees, the birds, other people. You are literally passing by entire towns and neighborhoods.

I dunno, I just find irony in this, intentionally or not. I know it means trying to get ahead of life so you can properly live it or something, but…you’re still missing it.

Huh. Maybe that is what it means.

Like the north wind whistlin' down the sky I got a song, I got a song Like the whippoorwill and the baby's cry I got a song, I got a song And I carry it with me and I sing it loud If it gets me nowhere, I'll go there proud

I love the comparisons here, because it’s not talking about an actual song, but the sounds of life. The wind, a baby’s cry, a whirlpool. There’s quote that I love be Cecily Morgan (at least according to Google), “Music is life and that’s why our hearts have beats.” We all have a song inside of us, the way our hearts beats (don’t science me, that’s for Logan’s Playlist). The phrase “follow your heart” is what I’m pretty sure this verse is referencing. Even if you follow your heart and it leads you nowhere, at least you can be proud that you got there, which not many people can say.

Patton is a huge part of Thomas. I’m not saying the others aren’t, because they are, but he holds his morals very highly. Patton’s input in anything, especially the big life decisions, is one of the most important next to maybe Logan. He knows what Thomas wants maybe even more than Roman. Sure, Roman holds Thomas’s hopes and dreams, but Patton gives him the motivation to go after them, to act on them.

Thomas’s choice to pursue Vine and then YouTube could have lead him nowhere. It really could’ve. But he followed the song of his heart and got there.

That’s allllll Patton.

Like the fool I am and I'll always be I got a dream, I got a dream

There’s some self-awareness here with the fool line. Patton’s not an idiot. He knows the others don’t think much of him. He’s the perfect definition of someone who may not be book smart, and therefore everyone else thinks he’s stupid. When in reality, he’s just not very good with words, so he expresses things the best way he knows how. This song is a really good example, because of all the nature comparisons in it. It doesn’t get too literal until this verse

They can change their minds but they can't change me I got a dream, I got a dream Oh, I know I could share it if you'd want me to If you're goin' my way, I'll go with you

Thomas has big dreams. We’ve all seen Roman, we know that. But like I said before, Patton is the one who can really get Thomas to go for those dreams. Like in Learning New Things, when Thomas was feeling self conscious because of one comment an old friend made, and Patton led the conversation that helped him to understand that there was nothing wrong with Thomas or his dreams, there was nothing wrong with feeling sad about the comment. How, in the end, it takes a lot to figure ourselves out and that without his YouTube career, he wouldn’t be where he is now.

So, yeah, others can change what they think about him, his career, and his dreams, but that’s not going to change what he does or the fact that he loves it. In fact, he’s willing to share that dream with others, and to help them on theirs, as he has done. Look at his team (or, I suppose, what we know of of Character Thomas’s team). It’s full of his friends and it seems like whenever they bring someone on, they’re welcomed with open arms. Now, I’m only talking from a fan’s perspective here. That’s just how it looks to me. He’ll help others achieve their dreams as much as they’ll help him achieve his.

So from what I’ve seen around, people really like Oranges. Or, well, me. I really love Oranges. The song, not the fruit. Not a big fan of the fruit (the texture is eugh).

And it’s such a Patton song!

That thing about him not being book smart? It applies here too. It’s a bit of a nonsense song at first listen, I’m not going to lie. A really fun nonsense song.

But then, I have to read the lyrics along with listening to the song when I do these because otherwise I just can’t pick up on every word. My attention span and memory is not that good, and I tend to focus a lot more on the music part than the singing part the first few times around. So maybe this is just my experience.

It's funny how nobody sings about oranges The reason's no rhyme, I'm starting to mind How we take our ideas and put them in storage But peel back the rind, who knows what you'll find

Take the same risks as if you're afraid If life gave you an orange, would you make lemonade And it's funny how nobody sings about oranges When you've got one in the palm of your hand

Lots of metaphors here. I think Patton just lives in a state of metaphors.

I’m pretty sure we’re talking about suppression here. Suppressing ideas, feelings, whatever, because of pretty superficial reasons. Once you strip those reason away, you can be unstoppable. We’re back to that idea of living the life you want, going where your heart takes you. Using what life gives you and running with it. Take some risks with it, if you must. But you have it. Use it! I mean if you’re given an orange, would you make lemonade?

No.

You’d make orange juice.

Crazy how nobody sings about chocolate Seems there would be nothing so sweet Like we're living in the boxes of someone who's locked it How can that be, it just ain't for me

Is…is the chocolate metaphor referencing Forest Gump?

Anyway, people like pushing others into “boxes.” Titles, positions, identities, whatever. They don’t like it when you step out of that box.

Which this is interesting to me, because as we’ve seen in the videos, Patton doesn’t like change too much. Stepping out of that box would involve change. He has gotten better at it since the changes video, but that’s not really something that goes away.

But on the other hand, the heart changes it’s mind all the time. It can be fleeting as much as it can be stubborn. When it comes to your wants and needs and dreams, that can change all the time. That’s why Thomas is a creator. Not just a YouTuber or a singer or an actor. He’s all of those things, all of which would have involved individual decisions on what to pursue and focus on. Which motivation would be the focus of the day or hour or minuet.

We're curving our motions and faking our bets If you don't open a chocolate, who knows what you get And it's crazy how nobody sings about chocolate When you've got it in the palm of your hand

Yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s a Forest Gump reference.

Which is a reference to life. How you’re never going to know what you’re going to get, what life is going to throw at you. But until you take it and uncover it, you really won’t know what it is.

I think this is a bit of Patton accepting that life is unpredictable and throws curveballs. Accepting that he needs to take whatever flavor of chocolate he’s going to get, whatever filling, no matter if it’s one he’s going to like or not.

We run in circles and just like this stay Now purple's got us blue and silver's going grey, hey hey Is there nothing else to say

Staying in the same place, always doing the same things, gets old. Without taking those risks or making what you can out of what you have, even if it’s not something that fits exactly what you think you need, just makes life fade away.

When you follow your heart through life, that doesn’t mean that you won’t be thrown some curveballs. Actually, it almost guaranteed that you’re thrown curveballs. That’s something that Patton has to be ready for, and ready to deal with, and not just making Thomas stay in the same state of mind.

It's funny how nobody sings about oranges Yeah it's funny how nobody sings about oranges Oh, imagine a world where we don't play this game With apples and oranges, nothing's the same

This game of staying still, comparing apples to oranges when they’re inherently the same (or at the very least have a lot in common). Where people follow their hearts and don’t duck away when things start to get a little tough.

While we know that Patton doesn’t like change, he is also the heart and he has to help Thomas deal with those changes as they come. It’s not easy or fun, but it’s something that he has to do.

I Don’t Wanna Pray is a song that grew on me the more I listened to it. It’s definitely got a fun tempo to it.

Also I want to go ahead and say that I have a kinda complicated relationship with religion. I have grown up with a religious family and have been to church a fair few times (we weren’t the kind of family that went every week, it was really only when I spent the night with my grandmother that I went). So I have some familiarity with the teachings of Christianity. If I don’t hit every beat on this, then I’m sorry. I did my best.

It’s not too surprising that a religious song like this made it onto Patton’s playlist. After all, we’ve seen how Thomas’s religion means a lot to him and how he lives his life by his morals. It wouldn’t make much sense if this type of song wasn’t on the playlist.

I love my God, God made love I love my God, God made love I love my God, God made hate I love my God, God made hate I love my God, God made good I love my God, God made good I love my God, God made bad I love my God, God made me (Yeah)

Normally I wouldn’t include so many repeats for the sake of length, but the one word changes here is worth looking at. It goes from love to hate to good to bad and then instead of repeating bad, it says “me.”

Could it be that the singer thinks they’re bad? Maybe, but I think the point of all these repeats is to say that “me” (humans) are composed of love, hate, good, and bad. That God made all of those things and then made man with them. And despite that, the singer still loves God, because He made all those things, even if it’s something we consider to be bad.

And everything listed goes under morals and feelings. Love, hate, good, bad. Everything that Patton is (“I’m the core of a lot of your feelings”) is those things, and then some.

But I don't wanna pray to my maker I just wanna be what I see Not just who I am but the pink and darling land And that fiery wild sky over me Help me through the sun Hey I'm lookin' everywhere See I'm looking to become not the pray-er but the prayer

---

I don't wanna pray to my maker I just wanna be feelin' free Not like in a book, or the leaves of trees that shook From a word that means only not a thing Pardon god and mom, what I'm sayin' isn't fair See I'm looking to become, not the prayer but the prayer

I pretty much translate this to “I want to be the good I see in the world.” That instead of praying and hope that God will fix something or make something better, that they want to go and do what they would pray for. To take all the good and love and bad and hate that God made them out of and do something worthwhile with it.

Not much good to talk, better to walk it Not much good to take, better to give We are gone forgiven and forgotten of our sins I promise you my friend all that dies will live again Pardon god and mom, what I'm sayin' isn't fair See I'm looking to become, not the prayer but the prayer

This verse really drives home that idea. Better to give the good than to take it from others. That, yeah, you’ll sin (bad and hate are included in that beginning verse, remember), but God will forgive them.

Honestly this whole song just reinforces a lot of what we already know. Patton, out of all the other sides, holds the religious teachings Thomas had closely. It’s how he has determined to live his life. And Thomas is a good person. He wants to do what is right and do exactly what the song says: give good and love, practice what he preaches. Maybe it’s not always fair, but he firmly believes in how he lives, maybe even to a fault.

I personally relate to New Soul and honestly this is another song that’s a very obvious Patton song and why it would be on this playlist. I know that’s the point, but still. It’s good.

I'm a new soul I came to this strange world Hoping I could learn a bit about how to give and take But since I came here Felt the joy and the fear Finding myself making every possible mistake

Gosh, we’ve all been here right? Going into a new situation or stepping into a new part of our lives and just messing it all up and tripping over ourselves as we go along.

Yeah, I know that’s how life works, but I’m still going to complain about it.

I don’t know if it’s the voice or the way it’s sung or the music but this song just reminds me of those scenes in movies where the MC or someone makes this new creature and the creature comes out and we have to watch them stumble through the world and learn about all the good and bad things about life.

But, like I said, we’ve all been there. Where we’re just feel like we’re thrown into this unknown world and have to stumble through it blindly.

I'm a young soul in this very strange world Hoping I could learn a bit bout what is true and fake But why all this hate? Try to communicate Finding trust and love is not always easy to make

This is a super hard lesson. There are people out there (myself included) who are just very trusting. We want to see the best in people and give them the benefit of the doubt. But it’s so hard, because other people see that and take advantage of that. It’s a hard lesson to learn and it sucks.

We’ve seen that Patton is like this. In Accepting Anxiety, he didn’t think anyone would break into Thomas’s car, even though it’s a very real possibility. He’s a bit like a little kid who doesn’t understand the “don’t talk to strangers” rule in that regard.

And as Logan said in that episode, it’s good for him to trust people, but he’ can’t always afford to. And man, sometimes you have to learn that the hard way.

This is a happy end Cause' you don't understand Everything you have done Why's everything so wrong This is a happy end Come and give me your hand I'll take you far away

There’s a bit of naivety here. Of being oblivious to the bad stuff and thinking that everything is still good and happy, but things are still wrong. The last part of it makes me think that it’s the singer telling another new soul to come with them, that they’ll protect the other new soul.

Another thing that just so Patton. He can be naïve, but he also wants to protect those around him from the horrors he’s endured (however sever those horrors may be).

And he makes mistakes. Sometimes irreversible mistakes. Remember, sometimes the heart leads us nowhere.

I can’t decide if Better Together is on there as a song to all the sides and Thomas or if it’s just to Roman or just to Thomas.

Now, yes, it’s a love song. No, we’re not going to talk about shipping in these, since I highly doubt that’s what Thomas and Joan were thinking when they put these together.

There is no combination of words I could put on the back of a postcard No song that I could sing but I can try for your heart Our dreams and they are made out of real things Like a shoebox of photographs With sepia-toned loving

Love is the answer At least for most of the questions in my heart Like why are we here? And where do we go? And how come it's so hard? It's not always easy and Sometimes life can be deceiving I'll tell you one thing It's always better when we're together

See, my first thought is Roman.

Patton and Roman have to work together in order for Thomas to be happy. Without Roman’s ideas and his hopes and dreams, there’s not much Patton can do to make Thomas happy. And without Patton giving Thomas motivation and having that love, Roman can give idea after idea, but Thomas can’t act on them.

They’re an important pair.

And in that second verse? It makes me think of Why Do We get Out of Bed in the Morning. All those questions? Why are we here, where do we go, why is it so hard? Of course Patton’s answer to that would be love. Thomas’s love for his job, his friends, his family, his fans. But Roman couldn’t really see that because he and Logan negated Patton’s input. I bet you that conversation would have gone differently if Patton had been there.

You can’t really have dreams and aspirations without having heart behind them, right?

And all of these moments Just might find their way into my dreams tonight But I know that they'll be gone When the morning light sings Or brings new things For tomorrow night you see That they'll be gone too Too many things I have to do But if all of these dreams might find their way Into my day to day scene I'd be under the impression I was somewhere in between With only two Just me and you Not so many things we got to do Or places we got to be We'll sit beneath the mango tree now

Okay so I’ve sat here listening to this part over and over again trying to get a read on it. Here’s what I think, and you know, I could be totally wrong.

There’s a balance between dreams being realistic and then them just being fantasies. We know that Roman doesn’t really know where that line is. Patton does. He helps to keep Roman in check and brings him back down to Earth when he needs to. But’s it’s good for them to be somewhere in between. Sometimes having crazy dreams and aspirations is good, just as long as you don’t get too lost in them.

I believe in memories They look so... So pretty when I sleep --- But there is Not enough time And there is no... No song I could sing And there is no Combination of words I could say But I will still Tell you one thing We're better together

Patton is big on memories. This has been made very clear in his room. Thomas can use those memories in order to want to continue to follow his dreams. Like the first time he saw a Broadway show, or the first time he stared in a production, and using that nostalgia and fondness to pursue his acting career. Roman goes crazy over those memories in Patton’s room, and we saw that at the end of it, he was psyched up to get back to the theater. Patton holding onto those memories did that. They can act as inspiration and motivation.

Patton and Roman can work so well together. They’re a creative team, they need each other in order for the other to strive. They help to balance each other out and keep Thomas creating and passionate.

And now, Vienna.

I almost feel like I don’t need to analyze this one. Everyone seems to have already done it.

But you know what, I love it so I’m going to dive into it.

After I gush about it.

The piano, the tempo, the softness of it. It’s an amazing song.

Okay okay I’m good.

So.

This song isn’t even about Patton. It’s about the others. It’s him talking to each of the other three sides. It’s him trying to tell them what he sees in them. Does it make me emotional? Yes.

So as always, let’s start at the beginning

Slow down, you crazy child You're so ambitious for a juvenile But then if you're so smart, tell me Why are you still so afraid, hmm? Where's the fire, what's the hurry about? You'd better cool it off before you burn it out You've got so much to do and only so many hours in a day-ay But you know that when the truth is told That you can get what you want or you could just get old You're gonna kick off before you even get halfway through, ooh When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

Logan. He is ambitious. He wants order and structure in Thomas’s life, and he works so hard to get there. But he’s afraid of failing. So he works harder. Patton’s trying to tell him to slow down. Don’t try to get everything done at once and to take his time. That it’s not the end of the world if Thomas doesn’t accomplish everything on his To-Do list. And if he keeps pushing, Thomas isn’t going to have any energy left for anything at the end of the day.

Slow down, you're doing fine You can't be everything you want to be before your time Although it's so romantic on the borderline tonight Tonight Too bad but it's the life you lead You're so ahead of yourself that you forgot what you need Though you can see when you're wrong You know you can't always see when you're right You're right

You've got your passion, you've got your pride But don't you know that only fools are satisfied? Dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true, ooh When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

Roman. Oh Roman, Roman, Roman. This one is my favorite.

He’s so ready to get to where he wants to be. He just wants to go go go, do everything so he can finally achieve what he’s been working on for so long.

But he’s ambitious. He needs to stop, take a step back, and breathe.

And Patton sees his self-confidence issues. He sees that Roman acts like a big brave prince but underneath it all he’s scared. He’s so hard on himself when he’s wrong, but he doesn’t celebrate when he’s right, when he’s on a roll.

Like I said before, Patton keeps Roman grounded. The passion, the pride, he helps to keep that in check. And as much as Roman may hate it, he has to be realistic about Thomas’s dreams.

Slow down, you crazy child And take the phone off the hook and disappear for awhile It's all right, you can afford to lose a day or two, ooh When will you realize, Vienna waits for you?

This one is short, but I think it speaks a lot for Virgil. He has kind of been the side that determines he’s on his phone a lot, maybe checking Tumblr and twitter to see what people are saying about Thomas, who stays by his phone to make sure that Thomas doesn’t miss anything, that he responds to emails and texts and phone calls right away so no one will be upset. So they don’t think any less of him.

But Patton wants him to realize that he can take a break. It’s not the end of the world. Like Logan, Virgil stresses about Thomas being on time and keeping to his schedule. Not because of order or structure, but because he doesn’t want Thomas to be a failure or to lose what he’s worked so hard for.

In a way this one goes with Logan’s. taking a break isn’t the end of the world. His friends and family will be okay if he doesn’t respond right away. It’s okay.

It’s You I Like is another song that I feel like it just Patton talk to the other sides. I don’t really know if Thomas and Joan had an idea of who. My first impression was Roman (what with his confidence issues) but looking at the lyrics I can really see it being to anyone.

It's you I like Not the things you wear Not the way you do your hair But it's you I like

The way you are right now Way down deep inside you Not the things that hurt you Not your toys; they're just beside

You

'Cause it's you I like Every part of you Your skin, your eyes, your feelings Whether old or new

Hope you will remember Even when you're feelin' blue It's you I like It's you yourself It's you It's you I like

It’s supper short song, so there’s not too much to break down. Honestly I think this is just Patton saying…yeah, he loves the other sides. He loves Thomas. No matter what any of them decide to wear, he’ll be supportive. No matter how they choose to present themselves, he’ll be there. No matter how they feel or think, he’s not going to go anywhere or turn against them. He likes them for them, no matter what.

Thomas and Joan have already said that Little Shadow is about Virgil. But they didn’t say why so that’s what I’m going to try to do.

Have you ever had a younger friend, maybe at school or as a neighbor, who kinda follows you around because they don’t know what else to do? Heck, have you ever been that friend? Or maybe you have a little cousin or sibling who watches your every move to learn how to be.

That’s kinda how I see the start of Patton’s and Virgil’s relationship. Virgil is new to the “Light” sides and he just got Thomas to start really listening to him and taking him seriously, but he’s still unsure of his place. So Patton guides him a little by being completely and undoubtedly supportive of him. To a fault, as we’ve seen.

But this song reminds me of that beginning, of Patton reaching out hand to Virgil and helping to lead him.

Patience, shadow For all your sight, there's no sight to see Little shadow, little shadow To the night, will you follow me? Pardon, shadow Hold on tight to your darkened key Little shadow, little shadow To the night, will you follow me? Closer, shadow For all your strikes, still, we're caught between All this sorrow, little shadow To the night, will you follow me? Every shape and size Deep and deep, we dive Turn and turn aside To a fantasy Little shadow Into the night, will you follow me? Little shadow To the night, will you follow me?

This whole song just makes me reinforces the “Patton wants to protect Virgil” thing. For a while there, yeah, Virgil needed Patton’s support and probably even relied on it. If this song is Patton’s point of view of Virgil (Thomas’s words) then we can really see why Patton treats Virgil the way he does. The song has this little shadow who needs a guide into the scary unknown. Maybe Virgil was like that at one point, but he’s not anymore. Patton still sees him like that, though, which is why he was still treating Virgil the way he was in the Phases video.

That brings us to Sad.

Thomas has said that this is the song that inspired him to make the playlist. That he imagined Patton singing it about Virgil. So to go along with the last one then…well.

You're just too good at being sad I'm just a Band-Aid on a broken heart Yeah, I'm the best at making you laugh For a breath, and you're back in your head, you're so sad You're so sad

Don't know if I'm hurting or helping It's just so damn hard to tell when You're just too good at being sad

Virgil is anxiety. He’s a huge part of Thomas and the fact that he’s there at all means that Thomas does have anxiety issues. He’s been open abut his social anxiety before, and Virgil encompasses that (among other things).

Patton tries to help. He wants to make Virgil comfortable, to get a laugh or even just a smile out of him. And maybe he does, but Virgil always ends up back to where he started. Anxious and sad.

All I wanna do is take the sad from you, but I can't and you wouldn't let me anyways

I think Patton feels a little helpless. His job, in his mind, is to keep Thomas happy, and to do that the others need to be happy as well. That’s why he tries so so hard. But in Virgil’s case, that’s hard. Not only can he not change who Virgil is or Thomas’s anxiety (and depression? We’re unsure at the moment), but Virgil wouldn’t let him change it. Either out of stubbornness or a fear of the huge change that would be.

The song goes on to repeat, so I won’t put any more lyrics here. I just think this song sheds so much light on how Patton is feeling right now, after Virgil’s rejection of the nicknames and the ask that Patton completely change the way he treats Virgil.

Then there was the whole thing with Deceit and Remus. The two haven’t really had much of a chance to reconcile. Virgil got his feelings out to Patton, but Patton is still sitting on his own.

There’s still a lot those two need to work on and talk about. Thomas seems to be in the middle of reevaluating himself and that includes the relationship his has with his anxiety. I, for one, am looking forward to see how it plays out.

Oh Heart is one of those nonsense songs I was talking about earlier. I love it, it’s so fun, but it’s also kkiinndddaaa hard to analyze. For me, anyway.

But looking at the lyrics literally all I can think is that it’s Patton singing to Logan, trying to get his attention.

I'm a bee. You're a tree on a moon cloud in the sea. --- Oh heart, Oh Heart, stop making a fool of me. (fool fool fool fool fool fool of me) Maybe I'm a monkey in the a tree running with the hope and possibility Throwing pennies down the wishing well Hoping and wishing Male monkey just to look at me. Look how quickly i can climb a purple tree. I’m gymnast, chemist, centric mathematician. You should look at me. Look at me!

This honestly looks like it’s Patton saying stuff to get Logan’ attention. Like saying “I know big words too!” and trying to impress him. And I can’t blame him! If there’s one side that ignores Patton the most, it’s Logan. He doesn’t think Patton is serious enough, when really he just doesn’t understand Patton’s reasoning. I'm great. I'm green. I'm gorgeous. I'm every thing that starts with a "G" I'm goofy. I'm gargantuan. I'm going to make you laugh again. Got one smile and I'm gone. I live in a horn

Again, a lot of him trying to show off his own knowledge in his own Patton-y way. He wants to get Logan to loosen up and have fun too, which is why he gets so excited whenever Logan makes a pun. I'm everything that a flower is I plan to make about 30 kids I got sink for his and hers and hers for his. One well where my cotton is I'm a Baby and I'm basically The B girl who's been baking your heart in my stove hungry for your love

Patton’s desperate for Logan’s approval. He wants the validation by the embodiment of knowledge, to know that who he is is okay. That his feelings and everything he feels is normal. If anyone would know that, it’s Logan. One day you have to show me How you do that thing when you ignore your heart. Oh, One day you'll have to teach me how you do that thing when you forget about the Sun Sun Sun Sun?

Logan’s able to ignore his own emotions so well, and Patton being the embodiment of emotions, likely doesn’t understand it. How Logan is able to just ignore those things. To ignore Patton. Those two have had such a silent tug-o-war going on, and they have been since Heart vs. Mind. No wonder Patton snapped at him in Moving On, Logan had been ignoring him for so long. Why couldn’t he understand the feelings were too hard to deal with?

The Flame is the type of song that is so soft it can easily put me to sleep.

You know I think this is my favorite playlist so far.

Anyway, The Flame is definitely about Roman.

Hold on to the flame That only you can hold That keeps at bay the darkest cold Another light could never make you whole

The flame here could be passion, motivation, an idea. Something that keeps the light of creativity alive. Roman, being pride, is easily able to be discouraged and dissuaded. Patton acts a bit like a cheerleader in that regard. I know I’ve said this before on a few other songs, but those two really would not be whole without the other. Their jobs would be a lot harder.

Softly but sure The story that you weave Will be the gift that sets you free The ashes of a tapestry

Patton knows that the creative process takes a long time. He’s there for all of it. But Roman’s the one who weaves the stories, so he sees the work put into it, helps with it.

There will be times That it seems your world and wants collide But hold on for your heart to beat inside To be your guide

Roman has to learn to let Patton really help him. They’ve worked together before, on the Mind Palace, on the Christmas sweaters. So we know that they work well together. It just seems to be on Roman’s terms. Patton is telling him here to let him help, especially when the world throws a bunch of stuff at them. The good and bad.

Hold on to the flame That only you can touch That lights the path it must The journey is a game of trust

Roman has to trust him. Learn to accept the help of others and humble himself a little.

There will be times that grow darker with the dusk But light will still remain in us The longest night is but a shadow's blush

Creating is hard. It takes up so much brain power and a lot of times you fall into this slump and you feel like maybe this time is it. I won’t be able to find that spark of creativity again. And it seems like it takes forever, but eventually it comes back to you.

Patton doesn’t want Roman to burn himself up. He doesn’t want that burn out to happen, because that affects not only Roman, but Patton too. So he wants him to hold onto the flame, don’t let it go so they can keep going.

Is Landslide considered country? I think so? I dunno. I don’t know why people were mad about it, it’s a good song (says someone who grew up in the south).

But like? Listen to the lyrics. Thomas and Joan didn’t put it on the playlist for no reason. You people want angst and this song provides it.

When I looked into what this song meant to the songwriter, I honestly couldn’t think of another reason it would be on Patton’s playlist. This was a song written after a breakup, and I don’t know if Thomas and Joan knew that or not, but after Moving On, I think it’s perfect.

I took my love, took it down I climbed a mountain, and I turned around And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills Till the landslide brought me down

Patton puts his love out there for all. We know this. We see it. Thomas loves so much and so hard, because of Patton. So when that love isn’t recuperated or the love that was given back and taken away, it’s crushing. Heartbreaking, literally. So when the breakup happen, imagine how he felt. I mean, I know we saw a bit of it in Moving On, but that was months after the fact. I imagine that, yeah, it felt like the ground came out from under his feet and pulled him down.

Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love? Can the child within my heart rise above? Can I sail through the changing ocean tides? Can I handle the seasons of my life?

Well, I've been afraid of changing 'Cause I've built my life around you But time makes you bolder, even children get older And I'm getting older too

This verse more than anything else in the song just screams Patton to me. He is the children within Thomas’s heart, for one. Heartbreak is hard, and reminding yourself of being a child, when such a thing didn’t happen (I’m talking serious heartbreak, here. And also just in general. To those of you who did have to go through heartbreak as a child, I’m so sorry and I hope you’re doing okay). Moving through a big change in life, standing on the borderline, you could say, is difficult. For someone like Thomas, whose morality keeps literally everything in Thomas’s life he can’t let go of which is to say…everything, it’s super hard for a big change to happen. To having to relearn how to live again, basically.

We saw it, in Patton’s two parter. How hard it was for him to accept that he needed to move on, and that it was okay to be sad. But as time went on, as he got older and learned how to live without his ex, it got easier. Or it will, I should say. I don’t really know the time period in which all this took place between episodes since apparently we’re on a timeline now that’s different to just present day.

Life can be a bitch and sometimes it crashes down on you and hard. Patton, out of all of the others, can and will feel the biggest impact of it.

If Roman was the bruised ego in Logan and Virgil’s debate episode, I’m not really sure what Patton would be like right after a heartbreak (as opposed to months after).

I feel like we all need the optimism that Float On has in our lives.

But yeah, this strikes me as Patton too. He tries to find the good in everything, even really shitty situations.

Backed my car into a cop car the other day Well he just drove off sometimes life's ok I ran my mouth off a bit too much oh what did i say Well you just laughed it off it was all ok

Oh the optimism. I feel like if this were Virgil’s POV he would be freaking out, but Patton’s just trying to keep things calm and look on the Bright Side. We all have these kind of people in our lives right? Either they’re really helpful or really annoying?

And we'll all float on any way well

Well, a fake Jamaican took every last dime with that scam It was worth it just to learn some sleight-of-hand Bad news comes don't you worry even when it lands Good news will work its way to all them plans We both got fired on the exactly the same day Well we'll float on good news is on the way

Again, the optimism. Taking the chance to remind yourself that yeah, you learned something out of this shitty situation. Good news comes with bad. Something good will happen even if something bad does as well.

And we'll all float on alright Already we'll all float on Alright don't worry even if things end up a bit to heavy We'll all float on alright Already we'll all float on Alright already we'll all float on Ok don't worry we'll all float on Even if things get heavy we'll all float on Alright already we'll all float on Don't you worry we'll all float on All float on

At this point, I don’t know if this is supposed to be Patton comforting Virgil or himself. Or both.

But in the context of the sides, this is really just how you have to calm your anxiety. It’s just constantly what my therapist tells me to do when I start to feel anxious, just tell myself “it’s okay, I’m okay for xyz reasons, this’ll be okay, it’s all good, that situation didn’t go as bad as you think it did, it was actually pretty chill, it’s fine” while doing some deep breathing.

So Patton being like this with Virgil makes total sense to me. Him being Thomas’s morality also makes him be the “dad’ friend and therefore the more comforting side. When Thomas gives comfort, it’s the Patton shining through, so this song is one that definitely highlights that.

You know, I’m not sure if putting a Beatles song on here was purposeful, or if the lyrics just fit, but The Beatles is such a dad band. And I don’t mean that as an insult to anyone who like The Beatles, they’re a good song but like…how many of us have parents that grew up with The Beatles in their prime? I swear there’s a club of Parent Artist: The Beatles, Elvis, early Michele Jackson. There’s probably more.

A n y w a y

With a Little Help from My Friends is a cute and fun song, honestly. I guess you can’t have a Patton playlist without having at least one song about friends. We all know how much Thomas loves his friends (*insert gif of Logan saying “I think he cares about his friends* here)

What would you think if I sang out of tune? Would you stand up and walk out on me? Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song And I'll try not to sing out of key

Back to Patton being a dad character, this verse just kinda reminds me of a dad. Someone who would randomly burst into song and it probably be a little off key just to either 1) embarrass their kid or 2) make them laugh.

And I don’t mean an actual parent, necessarily. A friend or partner can be the same way. It also shows a bit of insecurity, like trying to make sure that the person he’s singing this to doesn’t leave if he ends up not singing that well.

What do I do when my love is away? Does it worry you to be alone? How do I feel by the end of the day? Are you sad because you're on your own?

This is another show of insecurities. Thomas’s lack of a romantic partner not only affects Roman, but Patton as well (see: the Moving On two parter). Roman wouldn’t be the only side feeling sad and lonely. Patton, needing that attention and validation just as much or maybe more than Roman, shares some of the same feelings.

No, I get by with a little help from my friends Mh, get high with a little help from my friends Mh, gonna try with a little help from my friends

I’m just going to go ahead and say that I’m not sure Patton would understand the high joke. I’m not even sure I understand the high joke.

But anyway, unlike Roman, Patton—being the source of Thomas’s love for his friends—would absolutely find that solace and validation through his friends. There’s a difference between platonic and romantic love, but as we see in the next verse, Patton just needs the love. He needs to be loved by other people in order to feel happy. Not to go all Logan, but looking at Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, that kind of support is something you literally need in order to function as a human being.

Do you need anybody? I need somebody to love Could it be anybody? I want somebody to love

Would you believe in a love at first sight? Yes, I'm certain that it happens all the time What do you see when you turn out the light? I can't tell you, but I know it's mine

I…really don’t want to talk about that last line. I’ll leave it there for your own interpretation.

Let’s just focus on the love at first sight line. Again, very Patton. He seems to me like someone who falls in love easily. And in this case, love at first sight doesn’t necessarily have to be romantic. Meeting someone who you just immediately click with is something that, yeah, happens all the time. Some of those people end up being lifelong friends (hi Kai).

Also I may be talking just from an ace perspective. It’s always been easy for me to love my friends (I relate very highly to Thomas in this regard).

But from a romantic (and I guess sexual??? But in my mind, that’s sorta Roman/Remus’s area. Also very uncomfy for me to talk about so we’re just not going to touch on it) perspective, yeah. Wanting romantic love is a hell of a drug. And in my opinion, romantic love at first sight is 100% possible and happens more than we probably think it does. And again, Patton (Thomas) strikes me as someone who falls in love easily, so it makes sense to me that he would relate to this idea.

Do you need anybody? I just need someone to love Could it be anybody? I want somebody to love

I feel that it’s important to note that at this point in the song, the singer sounds very tired. Like yes I just want somebody to love stop asking. It also strikes me as an affirmative to the questions asked. Yeah, it can be anybody. But in the repeated chorus that comes after, they also reiterate that they get by with help from their friends. Their friends are there and they help, even if they don’t fill the romantic hole. They still provide that support and love that can fuel someone who loves as strongly as Thomas does.

What Makes The World is another song I just love. It’s so fun to sing along with and it’s catchy and fun and it’s just great.

Also, and I know I probably sound like a broken record here, but it’s such a Patton song! And like, I know that’s the point! But still! It’s so good!

Oh, I heard that spreading hate is easy And kindness is beneath me But that ain't so And I heard that God ain’t worth believing And hearts are made for keeping But that ain't so Fear can be found in the heart of the proud Peace runs it out without making a sound

Patton’s such an optimist. He’s also stubborn, as hears can be. So believing in what these lyrics are saying is 100% him. Believing that kindness is easier than spreading hate, believing in God and knowing when to let go of someone, living in peace instead of fear. It’s all so Patton. It makes so much sense to his character and that these lyrics would speak to him.

What makes the world What makes the world What makes the world What makes the world keep spinning? What makes it all What makes it all What makes a life worth living now? Love makes the world go 'round

This is the only time I’m going to put the chorus, so let’s talk about it.

For someone like Thomas, who, as we’ve established, seems to love so easily, believing that love and kindness is what makes up the world and gives life worth makes a lot of sense. Thomas, as people would say, has a kind heart. He reminds me of characters like Steven Universe or Mable Pines, both characters who care a lot about those around them, their friends especially.

Also, just for lyrics themselves, they have a ring of truth to them. Being cynical and full of hate gets no one anywhere. Spreading love and kindness and happiness makes life a lot better, both for you and those around you. And it’s a mindset Patton has. It’s why he tries to keep the peace between the other sides. Having inner peace and inner kindness is super important, and I think it’s something he tries hard to keep up, even when things get rocky.

Oh, I heard to turn away a neighbor Is living without danger But that ain’t so Love is so much more than just a feeling It's comforting and it's healing For our souls

It’s really hard to analyze where there’s not much to analyze. Or sounding more of a broken record than I already am.

This just furthers the idea that Patton holds this kindness mindset close. Helping others is an important part of that, even and especially a neighbor. And maybe it does show a little bit of him being quick to trust, because while helping a neighbor out can be good, you should also be cautious because people are crazy. But in Patton’s mind, of course you should help! They are your neighbor after all!

Now the next verse is something that strikes me as something directed at Virgil and Logan, both of whom are reluctant to admit they love someone. But love is more than a feeling, it’s something that can encompass all of us. it’s a strong power, one that can be wielded for lots and lots of good.

And hey, loving oneself is important. Being loved by others is important. It’s really not something any of us could live without.

I could know the future I could tell you what it holds I could own the world And all its glitter and its gold I could have the faith To move mountains and the sea Without love, I don't have anything

This is a verse that pretty much translate to the last line in it. You can have all the power in the world, but without love, do you really have anything? It your life really whole?

And you know, I think Patton would remind himself of this a lot. Especially when Thomas is having another one of his dilemmas and Roman and Virgil or Roman and Logan are fighting again, when Thomas (and himself) start to feel down and doubtful. It’s a small thing, to some. After all, love can’t cure anxiety or depression. Love can’t solve every problem.

But it helps, even a little bit.

Do I even really need to put the lyrics here for Somewhere Over the Rainbow/It’s a Wonderful World? Don’t most of us just know these lyrics already?

Also can we just all appreciate the amazing talent of Israel Kamakawiwo’ole??? Such an amazing voice.

Anyway yeah I’m going to put the lyrics, because I know most of you aren’t going to want to look them up. Which is valid.

Somewhere over the rainbow Way up high And the dreams that you dreamed of Once in a lullaby Somewhere over the rainbow Blue birds fly And the dreams that you dreamed of Dreams really do come true ooh ooooh Someday I'll wish upon a star Wake up where the clouds are far behind me Where trouble melts like lemon drops High above the chimney tops that's where you'll find me Oh somewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds fly And the dream that you dare to, oh why, oh why can't I?

The Wizard of Oz honestly feels like a movie/show Patton would really like. Dorthy seems like someone he would relate to. Her kindness and optimism I feel like would speak to him. Also, she has a super cute dog.

Somewhere Over the Rainbow is a very wistful song. It’s a song that promises that things will be better, one day. That you will achieve your dreams, even if those dreams aren’t wild. I think it really shows that Patton has dreams too, but not necessarily as big as Roman. This song is a lot more chill than the multiple on Roman’s playlist that talked about achieving your dreams. And this is the only song on here that really talks about dreams. And honestly in Patton’s case, it seems like his dream is to just be happy, however that may be.

Well I see trees of green and red roses too I'll watch them bloom for me and you And I think to myself What a wonderful world Well I see skies of blue and I see clouds of white And the brightness of day highlight the dark and I think to myself What a wonderful world

The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky Are also on the faces of people passing by I see friends shaking hands Saying, "How do you do?" They're really saying, "I...I love you" I hear babies cry and I watch them grow They'll learn much more Than we'll know And I think to myself What a wonderful world, world

The entire meaning of What a Wonderful World is to marvel at all the little things that exist, like flowers blooming, the rainbow, the kindness people show one another. Of seeing the good in the world and really appreciating it.

That’s something Patton absolutely reminds Thomas to do. Think about how the generations after him will learn so much more about the world, everything that had to have happened for the sun to shine today, the beauty of everything around him. Really “stop and smell the roses” kind of vibe.

And maybe because it’s such a chill song, but it makes me think of sitting outside on a warm but not too warm spring day, breathing in the fresh air and enjoying the sounds of nature. Or driving down a winding road in the mountains, appreciating the beauty of everything around you, how big the world is and how vast. Watching the birds fly overhead, watching people as you sit at a red light as you pass through a town. Wondering what their lives are like, if they’re doing okay, hoping that they’re in a good place.

Okay, I may have some experience with this.

But it’s also something I can imagine Thomas doing with some goading from Patton. Logan might be the “there’s a ton of stuff that had to have happened in order for you to exist so you should appreciate that” but Patton is the one who actually appreciates this (and the more I think about it, the more I think it’s a tragedy that Patton couldn’t be in Why Do We Get Out of Bed in the Morning).

Besides, if anything can appreciate being alive, it’s the heart.

Alright everyone, last two songs here we go

I honestly had no idea what Golden Slumbers brought to the playlist, other than it being a nice soft song that goes well with the transition to the end. then I realized this version of it was a cover of a Beatles song (I’m not that familiar with them okay?). So I wondered why they didn’t’ just put the original song on the playlist (I know there’s already a Beatles song on there, but they went to the trouble of putting the original version of I Need a Hero on Roman’s playlist and YES I am still salty it’s not the Shrek 2 version).

Turns out the cover is from a movie called I am Sam, and it’s about a disabled father raising his daughter to the best of his abilities. Now, I haven’t seen the movie, and I did just a little bit of research, so it could be totally missing the mark here. But the fact that the movie is about a father-child relationship felt a little too on the nose to ignore.

Now, as we all know, Patton is not really a father nor is he disabled. But a movie with such a moving plot and a high focus on the father’s determination to be a good one for his daughter seems to me like something Patton would very much, well, take to heart.

Once there was a way To get back homeward Once there was a way To get back home Sleep pretty darlin' Do not cry And I will sing a lullaby Golden Slumbers fill your eyes Smiles await you when you rise

These lyrics just repeat so…really this is all there is.

This song just brings comfort to the mind. I mean, that’s what lullabies are, right? Something to sing to your child when they can’t sleep in order to soothe their mind.

However, and allow me to get a little angsty and kinda headed into headcannon territory, it also seems like something one would use to comfort oneself. Maybe when they’re crying at night because some emotions are just too overwhelming, or they had a really bad day. A soft and sweet song to soothe the mind could be really helpful.

Now I’m not saying that that’s even remotely what Thomas and co were thinking when adding this song, but it was just something that popped into my head.

It’s so fitting that the last song is from Winnie the Pooh. I just love that. And be honest, how many of you are just now realizing it’s from Winnie the Pooh because you didn’t see the cover art at first? Huh? Huh? Just me? Okay.

I can’t decide if So Long is talking about Virgil or not. Like, I want it to be, but I don’t know if that’s actually it’s purpose.

It's not complicated but very hard to grasp But every time I see you I laugh I won't get too sappy, I've had no epiphany I just enjoy your company

See? Seems like Patton’s version of his friendship with Virgil. I mean, really, Virgil is the only one out of the other sides who Patton actively calls his friend. It’s clear he wants that relationship with Logan and Roman, but Patton and Virgil are really the only ones with any kind of clear friendship

You test my nerves, it makes me stronger So can you bother me a little bit longer? Hate to say goodbye, goodbye Hate to see the end, the end 'Cause it's been so long since I've made a friend

I feel like in the beginning, Virgil really did test Patton’s nerves. Patton wasn’t the number one Virgil fan until after Accepting Anxiety. Likely because Thomas had made the realization Virgil wasn’t the bad guy, but we’re getting off topic. Looking back at times before that arc, Patton seemed to only tolerate Virgil like the others did, though he did grow to Virgil faster than the others, even Thomas.

Hate to say goodbye, goodbye Hate to see the end, the end 'Cause it's been so long since I've made a friend like you Well, I could dot the I's and you could cross the T's 'Cause letters alone are lonely

God that’s so cute.

Anyway, yeah, very Patton imagery there. Kinda reminds me of the puppet episode, the simplicity of it. But giving the letters a “buddy” makes me think of Patton being Virgil’s buddy. It also makes them complete, and Virgil completes their little group.

Well, I could be the blossom and you could be the bee And then I could call you honey

Again, two things that go together, making something better.

Also, again with the very cute imagery.

You test my nerves, it makes me stronger So can you bother me a little bit longer? Hate to say goodbye, goodbye Hate to see the end, the end 'Cause it's been so long since I've made a friend Hate to say goodbye, goodbye Hate to see the end, the end 'Cause it's been so long since I've made a friend like you Some like to be alone, independent and on their own All alone, I guess they're free but not me, not me

Yeah, Patton being a loner isn’t really something that adds up. He’s very sociable and likes to be around the others. I mean, Thomas loves being around his friends, so it makes sense that Patton would be bored being alone, or just straight up dislike it.

Hate to say goodbye, goodbye Hate to see the end, the end 'Cause it's been so long since I've made a friend Hate to say goodbye, goodbye Hate to see the end, the end 'Cause it's been so long since I've made a friend like you

Okay i’m actually going to address the phrase that’s repeated a thousand times.

Remember how Patton said he likes to leave his room when they have to have a T party because he gets to see the others? Well it was kinda implied that he doesn’t always like going back. He likes interacting with the others and hanging out with them. A lot of times in the episodes, he seems excited to see the others when they come up (or appear, in Virgil’s case).

Or, there is one more conclusion I can make to this song.

This is Patton talking to…well, us. the listeners. We’ve spent the past hour listening to his songs, ones he put together (look at the descriptions of the playlists. They’re all implied to have been together by each side). So, after to listening to all these songs he “used to listen to when {he} was {our} age…and {his} age now” it would make sense in my mind that he would then consider us friends and this is his way of saying goodbye.

“I had a good time with you, kiddos, I hate to see you go! Come back some time. So long!”

#sanders sides #patton sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #thomas sanders #patton's playlist analysis

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revangerang · 5 years ago

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Oh boy I really got in my feelings and wrote way too much lmao

Tagged by: @edithpattou86

Tags your friends to do their own lists: @chierafied @mother-ishvara @doughygraduatestudent @kazoomajor @pagan-assassin

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Top 5 animated movies:

1. Whisper of the Heart - Such a cute and whimsical slice-of-life coming of age story, and so inspiring for creative types! I love how Shizuku sees her fantasies come to life in the world around her, and how she just follows her whims to wander the city and treats each day like an adventure. I see a lot of myself in her. The grandpa and his shop are so cool! I want to find a place like that in my city! I love how she and Seiji inspire and encourage each other to improve themselves. Even though they’re so young and I usually hate that kind of thing, I think it’s a very realistic portrayal of what true love and a healthy relationship should be. The way her writing is treated as a creative process and something she can polish with hard work is just such a wonderful message and so inspiring to me.

2. Spirited Away - I love the Japanese culture and mythology, and the serene, still tone of the film. Truly beautiful. The way it doesn’t paint the spirits and gods in a bad light is good and correct: they were the careless humans who went into their world and took what they shouldn’t have. But it still focuses on the supernatural and eerie elements, often without even explaining anything, which I love. And the bathhouse feels like a real functioning place with workplace culture and all. And of course it’s great that Chihiro steps up and learns to be strong. I just love it.

3. Howl’s Moving Castle - I love all the characters so much, and all the magic and whimsy. The fantasy European setting is so charming, and they did a good job depicting Western magic. Ghibli movies really have such mundane magic, and they make me feel like my life is magic too. Sophie is so good and strong and I love seeing her come into her own. And Howl is hot. lmao

4. My Neighbor Totoro - I had the original Fox dub of this on a bootleg VHS my grandma made us when I was literally like an infant. My parents threw it away when I was still young- like no older than 5- because it “has Eastern religion in it” 🙄 Too bad for them the damage was already done lmfao. It was definitely one of the biggest influences of my formative years, I loved it so much and I’m so grateful to it. That mundane magic I talked about before, and just introducing me to a totally different worldview from my sheltered white American Christian bubble. I was fascinated by every single aspect from the traditional Japanese-style home to the bentos to the shrines... I really admired Satsuki and how grown up she was, taking care of her little sister like she did, making the lunches, all that. It’s really such a charming movie with great music and such a realistic depiction of childhood. Plus who doesn’t love Totoro himself?? And catbus! Iconicccc. I still look for little portholes in bushes and trees to this day lmao

5. Mulan - My little 8-year-old enby ass crying in the living room and repeatedly playing the Reflections scene over and over makes so much more sense now 😂 But really it’s just such a great film with a unique art style, fun characters, and great music. I love how Mulan fights for what she believes is right, and wants to protect her father. And I think it’s great how she also fights to find her own place in the world. I like how they don’t make it a “not like other girls” thing, but just that she personally somehow doesn’t feel comfortable in her own skin with the makeup and all that. Between her living as a man and the clear romantic relationship between “Ping” and Shang, it’s pretty good queer representation for a 2000s Disney movie lol. Also Mulan and Shang can both get it I mean what.

Honorable Mention: Prince of Egypt - That animation tho! So fucking cinematic!! And the music and everything just ugh so good! The characters are really compelling too and you can totally feel the brotherly love and familial issues.

Top 5 live action movies:

1. Miss Pettigrew Lives For A Day - This is a movie where you can’t look away for a moment or you’ll miss something important. It really is just one entire heck of a day for the main character like howwww does so much happen. It’s really just written so well honestly that they manage to pack so much into a single movie and a single day. I aspire to that level. The 30s setting is so great with the costumes and set and music ahh I get so much inspiration from it. Every single character (and actor for that matter) is just fantastic. It’s super funny- that situational comedy is my jam. And there are touching moments that give me inspiration for my own life. I relate to Miss Pettigrew with her clear social anxiety, and perhaps neurodivergency? But I love how the events of the film bring out the best in her. And Delysia is just so charming! I want her confidence

2. La La Land - Such a fun and whimsical musical about life for creatives in Los Angeles~ It makes me feel nostalgic and proud to live here. I love all the different homages to classic Hollywood, and the music is so good!! The love story feels realistic and I actually really like that they don’t end up together in the end. They just encourage each other to be better, and if that means being apart, they’re willing to do it. It is another one that gives me inspiration for my life and creative endeavors, especially The Fools Who Dream 😭 Gets me every time.

3. Mamma Mia - This is my shameless feel-good movie. I love just putting it on in the background as I clean or whatever. It’s just so upbeat and fun!! I love Amanda Seyfried and Meryl Streep especially. And I like that the main character learns what she wants (and doesn’t want) out of life right now. And I love that they depict older characters and women!! having full and rich lives including romance and sex. The message that it’s never too late for love is so great! And also just like please communicate and you will probably save yourself so much heartache lmao.

4. Across the Universe - I have an affinity for the 60s and 70s, and I love how this movie kind of takes you through that era with the various characters. It’s such a fun movie with great costumes, cinematography, and music! I just love all the covers of the Beatles songs!! I honestly like them just as much as I like the originals. This is one of the first things I ever saw with positive/neutral queer representation?? Like Sadie is presented just as she is, without it being like WHAT SHE LIKES WOMEN?????? I”MPOSSIBLE !! Or making it all about sex or whatever. It’s literally just like “I want to hold your hand.” Also the whole bit with Eddie Izzard is just incredible lmfao

5. LOTR - My first fandom~ I love these movies so much ughhh. The music! The costumes! The characters! The world! The high fantasy!! I think PJ was so true to the books, or at least as much as he was able in just 10-ish hours. I love that they just went for it and filmed all three in one go, and made them over 3 hours long, which was basically unheard of at the time for blockbuster films. They did so good fully representing the different races through costume, language, culture, and the music too. I literally used to just lay on my bed for hours at a time in junior high, listening to the soundtracks and being immersed in the world. My friends and I would often play pretend that we were in Middle Earth (so lame for middle schoolers lmaooo). I love every single (not-evil) character and I will fight for them. I will especially fight Denethor I don’t even cARE !

Honorable mention: A Little Princess - Sooo whimsical and lovely, even when the girls are going through hardship! I love Sarah and how she literally does magic and even puts a curse on what’s her face omgg. She’s so charming and a genuinely good person too, even though she could have been a spoiled brat. The big climactic scene is so !! Omg I still get the adrenaline when she’s crossing the board and then hiding from the police even though I’ve seen this countless times since I was a small child. And it’s so wonderful that she’s reunited with her father, and they adopt the other girl. It taught me at a young age that the world isn’t fair and people will be nasty and abusive for no reason, but that you can still believe in magic and “fancy yourself a princess.” And the neighbor guy taught me that strangers will step in to help out of the goodness of their heart.

Top 5 TV shows:

1. ATLA - One of the best series of all time. The worldbuilding, lore, storyline, character development, animation, music, etc, are all incredible. If they had gone with the original intention of making Zutara canon it would have been literally perfect and so subversive and innovative! As it is it is still nearly perfect and they still did an amazing job with Zuko’s redemption arc. I just ignore that very last scene tbh. In my mind, it didn’t happen. The series addresses so many issues like imperialism, sexism, abuse, family, disability, war, etc, in a very realistic way. Uncle Iroh is literally a treasure.

2. Steven Universe - So charming and wonderful!! I just love it so much!! It is so goddamn queer, it makes me so happy. Stevonnie is the nonbinary representation we don’t even deserve!! I love every single character. I love the animation and the music too! The bgm is so bubbly and glitchy and cool, super on point for trends these days. And the original songs are so charming~ It also deals with a ton of important issues like imperialism, interpersonal relationships, oppression, self-identity, abuse, leadership, mental health, boundaries, consent, brain-washing, unlearning unhealthy behavior, etc. I love that every single character, even minor ones, get character development and a chance to be strong and improve themselves. And it shows that even the ones we initially think are super strong and have it all together, actually have their own issues that they struggle with too.

3. Yuuri!!! On Ice - This show!!!! Oh my goddddddd. Literally perfect. I love that it just subverts every single trope???? Especially with the events at the beginning and the big spoiler in episode 10. Simply incredible. I love every single character so much??? Even ones I was expecting to hate, like how Yurio is a little shit at the beginning, and then when Lilia is introduced as this super severe tyrant, but she ends up just being a good, yet strict coach because she really wants Yurio to succeed. It’s honestly just so wholesome! The music is so amazing and the ice skating is really realistic too! It really shows that they had an actual skating choreographer and worked off video of him performing. I love how realistic the whole show is like with lots of social media, youtube, instagram, etc. And it does a queer romance without it being a gimmick. It’s just a sports anime with a side plot of a romance but it just happens to be gay. And Kubo-sensei has stated that homophobia doesn’t exist at all in their world which makes me so happy. It’s honestly so queer and I adore how all three main characters are genderfucks a bit. I also love how realistically Yuuri’s anxiety and depression are portrayed. I relate so much to him, especially because mine exhibit in the exact same ways as his. It’s another one that inspires me to fight to be better and live the life I want to live.

4. OTGW - So charming. A perfect addition to the canon of New England fairy tales. The music is great, the animation is wonderful and nostalgic, the characters are fun and interesting and spooky. I love how liminal it is and you aren’t really sure where they are or what’s going on for the majority of the episodes. Greg is the most realistic depiction of a small child and the brothers’ relationship is the most realistic I think I’ve ever seen in my life lmao. He’s just so random and weird and has such Little Kid Logic I love it so much lmao. The story is perfectly contained in its 10 short episodes, and it gives a very satisfying ending. I still can’t get over how many huge stars were in it too?? Like fucking Tim Curry as Auntie Whispers???? I can not believe.

5. Inuyasha - I’m weeb trash and this show is also trash but I love it so much okay. As a big fan I hold so much against the anime for changing things from the manga, but even so I love it. Overall I think the animation, music, and voice acting is perfect. It’s so cool with all the mythos of youkai and the shikon jewel, plus I love traditional Japanese culture stuff. And isekai type stuff is my jam. If I found a portal to another world or to the past you bet your ass I’d go through it. I totally don’t still look for portals as a 30 year old adult, I don’t know what you’re talking about 😂 Kagome is such a great mc tbh like she’s so smart and strong and talented and kind I just love her so much??? I want to be more like her. And I love all the characters honestly. I have to overlook some questionable 90s anime tropes for certain ones, but I still love them. As much as we rag on the constant upgrades thing, the battles and stuff are pretty thrilling, and overall the series is good fun. And yes Sesshoumaru is my husbando, next question.

Honorable Mention: Doctor Who - I love how this show manages to be like every single genre?? SciFi, historical, comedy, thriller, mystery, slice of life, etc. I love all of the Doctors, and all of their companions. I just love how much the Doctor loves humans, and how much faith they have in humanity. And again it’s that whole isekai, time travel, normal modern human goes on magical adventures thing. I would go with the Doctor in a heartbeat. I still cry over Donna 😭

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swamp-world · 5 years ago

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When I’m reading reviews of books, sometimes I see things that really make me question quite a bit about what people are looking for when they read these books. A lot of this is in relation to women characters and how they’re portrayed, and the fact that it seems like there’s no right way to portray them at all without people getting upset--if a woman is a typical “strong female character” then she’s a trope and unrealistic; if a woman doesn’t fight and needs to be rescued then she’s a poor caricature of women and offensive; a woman cannot be decisive and in power one minute and then cowed in a different scenario right after--but there’s so much to the writing overall.

[minor spoilers i guess for TYE, maybe Song of the Lioness and Nevernight?]

First of all, I see a lot of people who lack critical understanding and comprehension, or who aren’t willing to put in the effort for it. I’m going to use a lot of examples from YA literature for this, because that’s mostly what I’m reading reviews for, because that’s what I largely enjoy reading.

The other day I was reading some reviews for The Young Elites by Marie Lu, after rereading it. I found that on the second read, as per usual, it didn’t hit in the same way; that’s not a bad thing, just to say that it didn’t have the same first-read wonder to it. But I still enjoyed it very much. Now, this one particular reviewer spent quite a while complaining about Adelina, and how she isn’t good, etc etc etc. Adelina goes on a villain arc. She does the wrong thing, she hurts people, she kills people when she shouldn’t and has no reason to. She is traumatized and doesn’t deal with that in a healthy or acceptable manner, instead taking it out on everyone around her. The entire point of her character is that she is trying to take control, but that her power thrives on fear and fury. She is in the wrong, she is told that she’s in the wrong, and then she goes and does awful things. That’s literally the point of the book. Apparently someone didn’t get that, because they spent quite a while complaining about all of this. So that was more of a short rant on my end.

Let’s go to some specifics: worldbuilding and characterization and as a footnote, plots.

I love worldbuilding. For me, physically creating new worlds to write in is one of my favourite things to do, and reading books where the author has put in effort is just as good. For peak worldbuilding, let’s look at a classic: Tolkien. He spent his life building up the world of Middle Earth. As the joke goes, he tells the story of every single tree. And that’s his style. Personally I haven’t read any of his books, and I know I’ll get murdered for saying that (I will I promise!!!!) but the worldbuilding is absolutely incredible, sometimes to the verge of Too Much, it seems. A modern level and a step down is Jay Kristoff, specifically the Nevernight Chronicles. I have yet to finish the third book, but the series is really amazing and I absolutely recommend it. There are a lot of people who dislike his writing style, which is understandable; I personally adore it. Kristoff does a lot of worldbuilding as well. He has little tidbits of history for each country and culture, both relevant and irrelevant; he makes the place feel real. For me, I didn’t find that this was too much, largely because it’s my preference. For other people, it was, and that’s also understandable: not all of it was relevant to the story or to what the audience needed to know. Another step down from there in terms of worldbuilding was The Young Elites. The world is developed enough that you know what’s going on, and you are given the information that you need to know. All of the countries involved seem to have the same or a similar religious system, though independent cultures and distinguishing features. You are told what is relevant to the story, and the worldbuilding isn’t lacking, but it isn’t going out of its way to the same extent that Tolkien and Kristoff do. And that’s not a bad thing! For some pieces, the worldbuilding is amazing, and that’s what sells it. For others, the worldbuilding is what it needs to be, because it doesn’t need to have the rest of it, and it’s just fine on its own.

However, it has to be balanced. I’m going to rip into basically every main-shelf author that you see at the front of the bookstore here. Wilbur Smith, John Grisham, any of these names--are they good at character development? The answer is, usually, no. No, their characters are all two dimensional, copy-pasted caricatures of one another. The abandoned brother, the incredible casanova, the strong woman, the wife, the lawyer. The characters are not spectacular. And you know what? That’s ok! Because those ones are about plot and setting, usually. John Grisham doesn’t write about characters, he writes about high stakes legal cases, and all of the fallout from them. Wilbur Smith writes about families, using them as a vehicle to write about African history, but the focus is on the events and not the characters. And that’s ok!! (I have other problems with these authors but for the point of the argument, let’s just go with it.) You don’t need to have amazing characters always if you have a good plot, and if the plot is the intention.

Sometimes you get a weird balance of these three elements, which I’m marking as what I’d consider the most important for me, for what I read. (The last paragraph is mostly exempt from worldbuilding because most of what’s the front shelf stuff isn’t SFF and doesn’t need it.) Sometimes you get authors like Tochi Onyebuchi, who, love him to bits, is not the best at plot or characterization in comparison to a lot of other authors. But do you know what!!!!! That is ok!!!!! He writes incredible worlds, with the focus being those worlds. The plot occurs because of the worlds, instead of the other way around. The characters are vehicles to move the plot. And that isn’t necessarily a bad thing! Just like if it were the other way around, with an intriguing plot and somewhat interesting characters but lacking worldbuilding, or amazing characters who are interesting and bring it to life, despite having a mediocre plot or worldbuildling.

What I’m trying to get at is that it feels like, regularly, people who are reviewing books want everything. If a book doesn’t have amazing characters and plot and worldbuilding, if you can see the plot twists coming, if you can’t relate to a cardboard character, if you don’t know everything about the world, then it’s a regular writeoff. I saw a lot of people tearing into Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce, because it’s written in a style more for children, or new teens; because the pacing is fast; because there isn’t a lot of detail. But it doesn’t have to be written at a higher reading level; it doesn’t have to be detailed or have immaculate pacing, especially when the first book is just exposition.

Reviews are a good thing, I wholeheartedly believe that. They’re a way to express what you feel about a book, to give feedback and criticism. It encourages critical thinking, and for me as a writer, helps me to find what I want in a piece that I’m both reading and writing. But at the same time, many people it seems lack the understanding that nuance exists, and that different pieces can have different styles and different focuses, and that doesn’t make it bad in and of itself.

#bookblr #booklr #readblr #book reviews #ya books #nevernight #the young elites #wilbur smith #fiction #reviews #salt #beasts made of night #tochi onyebuchi #marie lu #tamora pierce #writing

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jeanjauthor · 4 years ago

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I want people to read the creator’s message below today’s webcomic, and then I want folks (who have the spoons to spare for it) to read the commentary below, and especially Mr. Morris’ replies to many of those comments. These dialogues between creators and viewers are very important when it comes to messages like this, ones which could be misconstrued when encountered without context.

For my part, I deeply appreciate that he posted his remark. He is a good guy, he does try to “mix it up” to diffuse & disperse bigotry moments (not perfectly, but nobody is ever going to be perfect)...but that isn’t the point. And it isn’t a point of “performative” apologizing. It’s not a performance; he genuinely feels bad about the timing of all of this and the potential for someone who hasn’t read the (massive) backlog of stories in the archives to see only surface images.

Regardless of what longtime or even shortime fans know about the story, regardless of utter newbs coming to the webcomic to view it...that statement needs to be there.

As I posted to Anonymous earlier regarding whether or not to include racial slurs in historical settings...to ignore that it happened, to ignore what it looks & sounds & feels like, is to try to deny the pains of the past, present, and future.

By pinning that particular message to this particular comic, Rick Morris is assuring people for generations to come that he knows the differences between fiction, reality, longterm plotlines and surface appearances. He knows, he acknowledges, he pledges to keep working toward being a better storyteller & artist...and that’s an important message for everyone to receive. Not just to inspire others, not just to apologize and explain context, but to renew his own pledges to himself & his readers that he’ll keep working on being better.

Storytellers don’t always tell comfortable stories. Sometimes we tell ones that are meant to hurt, in order to evoke emotions that can create not just sympathy but empathy for the suffering of others...and sometimes that backfires. Sometimes we tell ones that hurt in additional ways, in very unexpected and unfortunate and/or badly timed ways, increasing the pain for some.

Intention is an important part of storytelling, because most stories have a lesson to teach to our audiences. (Not all need to have one, but most have something for others to learn.) Intention also includes trying to be aware of unintended outcomes.

One of those lessons occurred today in a storyline that has been building to this climactic moment for literally the last four-plus years. No one could’ve predicted how real world events played out. At the same time, it would be wrong to stop telling this story to “wait for a better time.” There won’t be a better time for it.

Changing systemic racism will still take years and decades more to come, even if this is a manual-transmission-clutch moment, where we could wind up going faster in our forward progress, or find ourselves dropped into reverse, with a possibly broken transmission. (Hopefully not, but not holding my breath. I got better things to do with my energy.) So there literally won’t be a better time for this story.

Instead, we need to acknowledge that these visualizations do exist without proper context, and that even with context it can still cause some folks to feel hurt. Mr. Morris understands if new folks won’t want to start reading the rest of the story because of this one scene (and the following pages involving the rest of this scene). That’s part of the message that needs to be told.

That’s part of the pain that needs to be acknowledged. It is not intentional, it isn’t the best timing, but it is acknowledged...and all he asks is that folks consider giving the whole story a try.

I’ve been following his webcomic for a very long time, and I can personally say his characters are vastly diverse, and that he does tackle bigotry head-on in multiple ways with multiple races, genders, social classes, and more. Is it completely problem-free? Nope! But like reality, the characters do learn & change & grow, the creator does, too...and many of his characters have some absolutely outstanding character growth.

You don’t have to give YAFGC a try, but I do hope you’ll read the message & the comment interactions if you’re a writer (or an artist)...because these interactions are a good set of dialogues about this subject, how to handle it, how to agree or disagree, and how to be polite when the latter happens.

Personally, I am deeply pleased to see he didn’t shrug off his responsibility to post that note, and isn’t shrugging it off...like a number of the commenters imply he could’ve done instead, via their absolution-style comments. Instead, he’s doing the work that is necessary, even if it’s seen by some as extra, unnecessary work. That’s something all of us need to step up and do, for this kind of topic. Acknowledge the inadvertent visualizations, and apologize for them.

...

Speaking of which...in The Song, I created the character of Duke Finneg, Councilor of Conflict Resolution for the Empire of Katan. The continent of the Empire of Katan is longer than it is wide, stretching from the Sun’s Belt (equator) in the north toward the Ice Sea in the south (separating Katan from the southern polar landmass, smaller than Antarctica and just as uninhabited).

When I populated the landmass that was Katan, I knew that there would be dark-skinned folk in the northern regions close to the Equator, and pale-skinned folks in the southern regions close to the south pole, because that’s literally why we have skin color variations. Those that live in the middle lattitudes have a mix of skin hues, some paler, some darker, and plenty of people have traveled all over and settled in different areas than those their ancestors were born & raised in, even if the majority of everyone really don’t move very far. (If you look at the real world, this is basically how reality works, too.)

This logical pattern is repeated all over the world of the DestinyVerse. In areas with thick rainforests like Natallia, which are tropical to subtropical, the people are tanned but paler in melanin coloration than Sundara, which is a desert environment with few trees for shade (again like the real world we live in). There are slaves in some countries & cultures, and there are anti-slavery laws in others. There are good people, and there are bad people, and there are indifferent or self-focused people who just are either apathetic or oblivious to what’s going on around them...exactly like the real world. But it is not our world

So when I designed the appearance of Duke Finneg, a Katani mage of important political power who was destined (plotwise) to have a high-strung temper and an increasingly unhinged world-view because of self-delusional closed-minded thinking...I was tempted to make him white, to be honest. But since he’s from Katan, he could’ve been from any point on that continent.

The Corvis brothers are mid-lattitude with a variety of transcontinental intermarriages in previous generations, but in general are lightly tanned, almond-eyed, and have hair from light blond to jet black, because that’s how genetic inheritances work in their particular bloodline (and I needed a way to easily tell brothers apart description-wise...but I honestly have seen some families with blond, brunette, & redheaded members). (That, and it’s a non-Earth world, so, I could make shh up like that.)

(If you honestly want to know what the Corvid brothers look like, they’re a blend of East/Southeast Asian & European, with more in the way of Asian features and that wider range of European haircolors, same as most Katani from the mid-latitudes...though some on the east coast mid latitudes look more Latinx than Asian, like the folks from the western side tend to look.)

So when it came to the main protagonist for the fourth book in the series...I decided to roll a dice for his origination point, low for somewhere in the south (pale & blond), high for up near the equator (dark & brunette). I wrote down the general characteristics for each of the numbers/regions that might come up (I don’t have the paper anymore, alas, it got lost in one of my household moves)...and I rolled. (With real D&D style dice, because I’m a frikkin nerrrrd, duh.) The dice rolled high, aka his family is from a region up by the equator region where there isn’t much shade and dark skin tones are needed to ward off skin cancer...so I wrote him to be dark-skinned, etc. It was literally a random dice roll.

There are other characters in The Song and in other books of the DestinyVerse, showing various skintones & social backgrounds. Some are high-ranked, some are low-ranked. There are skin hues and hair colors in a wide range of hues. There are cultures with social equality, and cultures that are extremely bigoted (yes, Mandare, I’m talking about YOU)...but they’re not Earth cultures, and they don’t necessarily have real-world problems.

But I can see how they can be seen that way if you just pick up the book, rifle through it, see that Duke Finneg is an increasingly unstable hardass with a hate-on for the people on Nightfall Isle (spoiler alert, if a bit late)...and read that he’s got dark skin and brown eyes, etc, and perhaps feel hurt that he’s a Black Man being typecast as the Bad Guy from reading just one scene, with nothing of any further context than just that.

So I apologize for that. I was trying to write a story set within the context of its own universe, with its own distinct and different cultures, and viewed that particular character--the same with everyone else in the book--while writing the story from that viewpoint. Literally, I rolled up the physical characteristics for most of the Katani characters on that “this is where they’re from” sheet, which is why the harbormaster and his husband in the later books look the way they do, why the various other Councilors look the way they do, etc, etc.

But that doesn’t negate the fact that one of my villain characters is an increasingly unstable darkskinned male, and for anyone who has been hurt or offended by that description for my antagonist/villain character, I apologize. It was not my intent to perpetuate a false, harmful stereotype from our own world. It was just a random description roll for a stereotype that (in my mind, at least) has nothing to do with race--and nothing to do with genuine mental health issues--and everything to do with closed-minded attitudes toward “inferiors” and clinging to those mental dogmas rather than releasing them and admitting one has gotten an opinion/viewpoint of others deeply wrong.

I’m working on being better, as a writer. And to be fair, when you look at the whole context of all my writings, I’m doing a better job when it comes to ensuring diversity for protagonists and antagonists than the majority of published authors (most of whom are white). I’m particularly pleased with my IaVerse, where the main & secondary & other important Human characters come from a wide variety of backgrounds, the chief villains aren’t relatable to anything stereotypically Human, and positions of authority & power are not only achievable, but also removable and/or punishable if one steps too far out of line when it comes to acceptable/forgivable behavior.

The one thing I will always try to do is to try to tell a better story. People may still get hurt, but my stories will have context, and lessons, and the message that respect, tolerance, and compassion for nearly everyone is very important.

(I will, however, uphold the paradox of tolerance by asserting the lesson of refusing to tolerate the intolerant in order to preserve the existence of tolerance, and I will always encourage the metaphorical/allegorical punching of Nazi types. Or actual punching in stories, particularly the milSF ones...but then that is a genuine official trope of the military fiction genre.)

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vroenis · 5 years ago

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The Internet Is Not Remarkable | Which Is Why It’s Remarkable

Oddly I’ve not ever felt the need to unplug. I don’t have a sense of separation between life happening away from the Wire and life happening on the Wire or the Wire not being life. It was never a distinct thing I ever had to decide was or wasn’t life or became life, either. Being born in the early 80′s, I guess means the Wire wasn’t always there as a salient presence, integrated into the fabric of life. Heyo I had a Nokia 3210. That doesn’t mean anything, by the way, it just places me on a timeline. Nostalgia sucks and is literally valueless. Let’s make art you can steal.

Anecdotally it means I saw the internet happen as a Thing. It’s less important than it sounds. Also the internet going from not being a Thing to being in our pockets. OK. But honestly it’s not very important. As in the transition isn’t important. There were a lot of people there when it happened and I think a lot of us if and when we’re honest will tell you now, in retrospect, it’s not a big deal. People older than I am and some my age and younger who have an ignorant and uninformed understanding of life and experience will go on about life being better or significantly more meaningful before or without the Wire but honestly they’re wrong. I’ll come out and say it’s flat better. Sure it makes misinformation easier as much as it makes all the good things better but wow media control and information mass-dissemination before the Wire? Are you kidding me?

On the topic of unplugging and digitally detoxing and I realise The 1975 just made a video all about it that was overly cute, yes, but still pretty fucken’ great. Let’s link it because honestly, it’s a wonderful snapshot of its time that they’re unquestionably aware will date immensely and that is a big part of the point. The 1975 hardly need any more promo but what can I say, I’ve no problem being part of an adoring fanbase and adore them we do. Let us adore.

youtube

That it’s so on-the-nose and that it’s a big part of the point is going to anger and frustrate people so much, moreso that exactly that reaction is a part of being caught-up in the inevitable participation in what the song and indeed, what Matty as an individual and what the band as a commercial and cultural entity are. The too cool thing to do is say you didn’t know anything about it, you didn’t watch it, you don’t care for it, you’re immune to it and continue to be ignorant of it - sure, I used to be cool like you. The thing is I both care less and more about being cool.

I love this song, I love what it’s doing and what it means. I love being a fan of and loving things. I love that other people love things I love. I still love loving things no-one knows about but I always love other people finding and loving my things, even if and when some of them behave badly because as an adult and an individual, I understand that participating in one cultural activity doesn’t mean I’m fully represented as a whole cultural entity.

Coming back to unplugging and that not being necessary for me, it connects to not being overwhelmed by it, which connects again, to the Wire not being separate and distinct from what I see as my experience of life. If the Wire is a mundane aspect of life then it’s unnecessary to disconnect from it. I engage with it as much as I engage with other things, that is to say I’m fascinated by, obsess over, and grow bored with things on it as much as all subjects, objects and activities in life equally. I don’t think this is unique to me at all, I suspect it’s quite common.

As it happens, I got into Instagram in a big way around the same time I got into contemporary board games. Both of these things I’ve almost wholly discarded. Almost, but not quite. I still maintain my Instagram account because I’ve made some valuable and enduring connections on it and as a platform I seem to have nurtured some semblance of an audience for a sprinkling of subjects and visual motifs. As for board games, I’m actually still quite interested in them but there’s so much about them as an industry and culture I actively dislike and have also grown bored of that I’ve consciously disengaged from them.

Facebook as a culture has always been weird to me, I can’t say I’ve ever understood it as a platform. Primarily it seemed to function as a space to connect with people you already know - OK. So then we’re encouraged to engage with one-another on... topics we may or may not already be engaging with either in our physical time together in which case, it’s redundant? Or we post articles we expect others to read which mostly they don’t unless aaaaaah - they’re short, reductive and in simple language and now the exercise is hazardous. The platform then actively co-opts strangers into discussions by facilitating cross-posting intra-sharing articles, which to be frank is about eyes on ads and ad-revenue, here we get to the ultimate objective of Facebook as a platform which I guess is why none of it makes any sense. Engagement at all costs. Of-course Facebook doesn’t care about racist groups and the real violence it precipitates, why on earth would that matter to them? The only thing that matters is capitalist gains. As long as it doesn’t directly cost them and as long as there are no economic consequences for them, they will proceed, and this is pervasive and transparent in the way all actions are facilitated and encouraged on the platform as a utility.

There’s more to discuss about Facebook but you’ve had those discussions before and they’re boring. Facebook is boring. The way people use Facebook is boring. Many of my peers ported to Instagram because as many of them said “It’s like Facebook but just pictures” and something along the lines of “It’s just pure” and there’s a high degree of truth in that. The sense of purity comes from the feeling of positivity in that thumbs becomes hearts - the likes an image gets. Engagement is fairly low-level. People express their endorsement of an image or do nothing at all. Occasionally there’s discussion, predominantly positive and for the most part I’d agree it’s wholesome. You can find toxicity easily enough and all of it is bad, but there are whole spaces on Instagram where you’d be forgiven for thinking it was a platform free of it altogether.

I guess it’s worth mention when I was peak Instagram, I was producing a super lo-fi but passionate board games podcast I recorded with R and we were also running several public and private board games groups around Melbourne. There was a lot of good about that sense of community and some of those people are still in our lives now. Platforms like Instagram are great for celebrating many of those aspects, I’d still say better than Facebook. Instagram is more approachable and simpler for just showing a thing and liking it - the engagement is direct and the commitment level (sign-up, visual clutter, privacy concerns, settings digest etc.) is minimal.

There are some Instagram Stories (read: Snapchat clones) there listed under This Account that briefly go thru the effective mothballing of my account. To have a different discussion here, I know how much and what kind of work it takes to build and maintain and audience on Instagram and it’s not interesting to me any more. It’s boring. I don’t mean to disrespect the audience I have there, all audiences are made up of people. Their behaviour on the platform is indicative of the cultural space that Instagram is, not their respective characters and that’s fine. That I’m bored is indicative of my feelings towards the platform and the culture it fosters, not how I feel about the people themselves. I still really like most of the people I’ve made connections with on Instagram and ping them DMs about beer, Lego and art once in a while. Instagram is about keeping it light - or lite is perhaps more appropriate - and I’m happy to keep my engagement level likewise.

That makes it extremely strange that I chose tumblr as a cultural space for my long-format writing, then, hey. Sure does. I did write about tumblr as a cultural space and honestly I still feel the same way about it - I absolutely love it here. Even tho I don’t engage in tumblr at all in the way the culture here utilises it, oddly I still feel right at home, fitting that one of the titles of the entry is Hiding In Plain Sight.

I don’t effectively have an audience for my writing here, tho, and that certainly is different. There’s a certain buzz missing from seeing a post light up with hearts, but then I think - a post gets a tally of hearts, of likes, so the people around me - my audience - likes an image and/or the accompanying text I’ve written tho that’s unlikely as the ratio of viewers to readers is likely to be extremely low. So if I think about how meaningful the text is to me versus the image, sometimes it’s split down the middle, but often the writing is far more important or at least there’s massive intent for gravitas to the image. Without the text, the image would be pleasant at best, and I realise that’s what people are engaging with and throwing a heart at, and I’m not interesting in doing that. I’m interesting in writing and expressing because I’m doing that anyway. I’m talking to and for myself regardless which I’m very happy to do, so if I’m going to do that, I’m happy to do it on the assumption of no audience and just express freely without restraint on subjects that interest me the most.

I either will or won’t develop that audience, but it will have to be with people who are dedicated enough to read and that might be a thing just yet, but who knows, there may be coming a time when people realise it’s not the Wire they need to unplug from. I’m not spinning up theories because it’s less complicated than that. I still operate a Facebook account. There’s a lot to hate about Facebook but of itself it’s mostly banal. Sure its UI and UX both are horrors that precipitate actual nightmares (unrelated but recent: none worse that iTunes MY GOD WHY WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY) but from a utility perspective it can be useful in the least. I have connections with a handful of people and communities which are useful to me for the moment so until they’re not, I’ll use the platform - but my weekly usage would be measured in minutes, I’m not sure I’d make cumulative hours in seven days.

When I moved away from Twitter and Instagram, I wanted a more considered approach to everything including images. I did once take long walks in Melbourne and photograph things that I found aesthetically interesting and under the circumstances that isn’t possible. I did stop doing that much earlier than Covid19 tho but that’s due to family circumstances alluded to in other posts. I still think if I ever take up photographing things with the same regularity, those images will end up here, simply because if I want to cut in with text, I can with better control. But also because it’s more meaningful if I don’t, and also as an artefact, a html page is something that invites a more static approach to the scrolling endless feeds of Instagram and Facebook. That design is absolutely intentional to promote short engagement and continued dismissal and that’s not something I want to encourage, with mine or anyone else’s art, thoughts, responses and engagement.

I don’t think I’ve addressed how The Internet Is Remarkable, but it’s pervasive in much of what I do on and with the Wire. I think accessibility is one of the most powerful things we do as humans. I’m sure there are folks who are sick of Margaret Mead’s healed femur anecdote or at least people quoting it. I fucking love that quote. I might not like people not fully comprehending it but I sure love what it truly represents. I think something people may be surprised to hear from me is that I will never say that I don’t like people. I really don’t like the quips and memes about hell being other people or I don’t mind going outside, it’s the other people ad infinitum. It’s easy to look at a large representation of behaviour and say “People are stupid” but it’s much more difficult to sit in a room of people you know and tell them they’re stupid. I might find it increasingly difficult to find other adults with which I can engage, on subjects I and they both can and enjoy engaging on, but I both have the willingness to and the optimism that it will and should happen. A part of that is the exercise - the practice of considered expression, of thinking, language and performance. Some of that for me is writing here, some of it is in the musical instruments I play, some of it is in the oral auditory words I speak.

Fucking around is good fun, we don’t always take life too seriously - sure, but we also don’t just fuck around. If that’s all you end up being able to do, there’s so much you end up not doing, not seeing and experiencing. Imagine the only form of expression you have is to tap a heart. That’s not to diminish the power of tapping that heart - mate, smash that shit - did you see that last picture of the beers we bought? DID YOU SEE MY BEERS? Those are some champion fucken’ beers, follow my Instagram.

Look you might need to unplug occasionally or partially or permanently or whatever. This isn’t a sermon, I’m not talking at you, I’m talking to you or rather I’m talking to myself. I’m telling you about myself because like everything I do and typically will always mention, it’s a provocation but also an invitation to talk about yourself. We share with one another to learn about other experiences and grow perspective on our own - you get all of that. That’s why the Wire is a good thing. Accessibility to broader experiences is a good thing.

This mass documentation we’re doing? Even if no-one reads it, even if only a tiny shred of it is shared... do you realise how immense that tiny shred is? Of a billion billion billion terabytes of unread, unseen, unknown data, the tiniest fraction that gets shared between humans is still huge were it to remain hidden and secret - all the wonderful art, the ugly horror, the juvenile silliness, the unending pain and sorrow, the saccharine sweetness, the lilting playfulness, the nonsensical vagary, the bare minimalism, the overbearing eloquence, everything subjective and argued and agreed and ignored.

The internet is an ordinary book of everything made of electricity and you carry a copy of it in your pocket.

I’ll echo similar sentiments to those in the feature on Jeremy Blake. You can be an arsehole, or you be awesome and kind and we can do amazing things together.

#internet #chrono #2020 #nostalgia #nostalgia is pointless #no really nostalgia has no value #steal this art #The 1975 #The 1975 The Birthday Party #NOACF #Facebook #Instagram

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ladyofpurple · 5 years ago

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answer all of the questions!!

holy SHIT ok bless you omg

(sorry it's a full day late i took this shit SERIOUSLY. don't ask me how many hours this took, i was in A Mood™️ last night. removed the ones already answered xoxo)

angel; have you ever been in love?

yeah. didn't end too well, but i loved him.

petal; favorite novel and author?

this is like asking me to pick a favorite child. i guess favorite author would be stephen king, if only based entirely on the sheer quantity of his books i own alone. favorite book would probably be special topics in calamity physics by marisha pessl, and i'm only saying that because it's been my go-to response for years. i have lots of favorite books. ask me again in five minutes and i'll give you another one.

honey perfume; favorite perfume/scent?

freshly made coffee. lilacs. jasmine. cut grass. the ground after it rains. chocolate chip cookies in the oven. cigarette smoke on skin. my mom's shampoo. my grandma. my dog when he's just had a bath. thanksgiving dinner. acrylic paint on canvas. sawdust. that one cologne i can't name but can smell on a guy from a mile away. mulled cranberry and apple juice. vanilla. coconut. fresh laundry. peppermint.

sweet pea; what’s your zodiac?

virgo sun, pisces moon, scorpio rising ✨

softie; talk about your sexuality.

i'm biromantic asexual, primarily attracted to men more than women (but have had too many crushes on girls to consider myself het), generally sex repulsed when it comes to the thought of having it myself. i prefer to call myself queer in passing conversation, it's easier than explaining asexuality and the differences between sexual and romantic attraction. if someone asks more specifically, i'll usually just call myself bi for simplicity's sake, even though the ace part is a much more important (to me) part of my identity. monogamous as fuck.

i'm still struggling with internalized homophobia and a lot of "am i even queer enough" thoughts, which is super fun. took me a long time to even consider the fact that i might like girls at all. i'll probably never come out to my parents. not that they'd, like, disown me or whatever, but they're juuuuust homophobic/transphobic enough that my few attempts to educate them when they say something A Little Yikes have shown me that i should probably just stay in the closet unless i absolutely have to come out. like i'm getting married to a woman or something.

sugarplum; what’s the color of your eyes and hair?

i usually say my eyes are green because it's easier, and they mostly are, but i have rings of greyish blue around the irises and sometimes they're more hazel in the middle. they always have a green tint to them though, even if the intensity of the green varies.

my natural hair is brown, a little on the darker and slightly ashy side of completely generic. currently a former blonde, although i'm hoping to bleach my fucking YEAR of growout soon, and then go some crazy color as a last hurrah before i have to go dark again. being broke fucking sucks.

wings; coffee or tea?

tea!! black tea. chai, to be specific, with an irresponsible amount of milk and sugar. chai lattes are a fucking drug okay? coffee makes me sick (not a judgement, a literal fact. last time i tried some i threw up).

fairytale; are you a cat or dog person?

cat!! but my family has a chihuahua named sonny and you can pry that little monster from my cold dead hands ok i will fight you.

snowflake; favorite time period?

okay, i wrote and rewrote my answer to this about 10 times. then i tried to divide it up into categories (aesthetics, history, fashion, vibes, geographical location, etc), but that didn't help. so basically: i don't have one, because i have too many.

i like the american 20s-60s for the aesthetic, music/movies, and the fashion. i also like the european 1600s-1800s for the interesting history and also vibe. i love the french and russian revolutions — the fashion! the art! the wars and political upheaval! I FUCKING LOVE HISTORY. then, of course, we can't forget the rennaisance. or the witch trials (pick your continent). and ancient greece? the roman empire? hello?? did i mention empires? how bout we mosy on over to south america — can i interest you in the mayans? incans? aztecs? what about china and japan? korea? vietnam? and don't even get me fucking STARTED on the black plague.

ancient egypt? sign me the FUCK UP. vikings? yes please. the celts? oh boy. the MYTHOLOGY. the ARCHITECTURE. the LANGUAGES and POLITICS and LITERATURE and REVOLUTIONS and GOD HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CHOOSE BETWEEN ANY OF THESE

i uh. might have gotten a little excited. basically i like history a lot. and mythology. and linguistics. and cultural practices. and the politics and prejudices behind wars and stuff. and learning in general. moving on.

vanilla; do you believe in ghosts?

let's put it this way: i don't not believe in ghosts??

listen. we don't know jack shit. we don't know what happens after we die, there are constant scientific revelations that turn our understanding of the universe completely upside-down, and there is literally no way to know which religions or myths or urban legends could have some grain of truth to them. like, dude, i've literally thought i was haunted before. psychology is bananas and the universe is infinite.

demons could be real. ghosts could be real. what if we just haven't invented the necessary technology to prove it yet? what if we never do, and they just fuck around alongside us, moving furniture and making shadow puppets on the walls just for kicks until the earth explodes? what if that one tumblr post was right and ghosts are actually real people from alternate universes or timelines that we see accidentally bc some cosmic wires got crossed? who fucking knows.

i love horror movies and scary stories and ghost hunter shows just as much as the next gal. but listen. psychics? mediums? people who accept every single creepypasta retold third-hand from their neighbor's kid's classmate's second cousin who "totally knows a guy"? doubt.jpeg

i don't understand the sheer amount of assumptions made willy-nilly about the nature of ghosts and demons and things that go bump in the night. the assumption that "oh this machine that totally doesn't look like a coathanger taped to a walkman will work because ghosts have this temperature and can always communicate like this and are electromagnetic" or whatever just baffles me. to a certain degree, following a general consensus is one thing — some basic things everyone can agree on? that's cool. ghosts can walk through walls and are probably dead people or whatever. but oh my god, taking every single story as absolute, undeniable proof?? taking these stories and expanding on them to infer intentions and scientific facts to something that by it's very nature is unknowable and assuming, like, every spirit is created equal?? and yeah, ghost hunting shows are fun and campy and kinda creepy but like. you really, genuinely don't think any of them have ever faked anything at all??? even if ghosts are real, it's fucking reality tv, my dude. it's the entertainment industry. at least maintain the slightest ounce of critical thought before taking zak bagans' word as the goddamn gospel.

and sidenote, maybe it's just my limited exposure as a white woman in the western world, but of all the shows and podcasts and movies and documentaries and whatnot i've been able to find and consume, there's the constant use of christian ideology applied to every situation that just really burns my bacon. what, there's never been an atheist ghost? if you see a shadow person and you don't know the lord's prayer by heart, are you automatically fucked? why are there never stories about, i don't know, viking ghosts? does your religion in life preclude you from becoming a ghost in the first place? is that why people never mention buddhist ghosts? i don't get it, and that's why even though i'm self-admittedly the most superstitious person i've ever met, true believers make me roll my eyes so hard they almost fall out. makes me come across as more skeptical than i theoretically am. I HAVE VERY STRONG FEELINGS ABOUT THIS OK

but like, you couldn't pay me to fuck with a ouija board. i'm not stupid.

delicate; diamonds or pearls?

both have their appeal and their place, but diamonds, i guess. i like the sparkle. but fake ones!! or synthetic. diamonds are overpriced and artificial scarcity is a scam and i don't need a dumb rock that some poor person in a mine somewhere was exploited and possibly died for. no blood diamonds in this house, thank you very much.

if i ever get engaged, i don't want a diamond ring. i'd want something cool, a little unusual, like a ruby or a sapphire or some other sparkly gem that isn't literally shoved in your face every waking moment as the expected standard symbol of True Love. they're cheaper, they're cool-looking, as a ring they still hold the cultural symbolism of an engagement/wedding ring. and honestly, as long as it's well-made and durable, whatever hypothetical gem it is doesn't have to be real either. i'm a woman of simple needs and demonstrably low standards. no point in going into debt for a fucking piece of jewelry, regardless of ~tradition~.

lavender dream; favorite album?

oh lord. welcome to the black parade, i guess. or anything by panic! at the disco. there are dozens of possible options — my interests are mercurial and my memory is garbage. but i'll always be an emo little shit. black parade and vices and virtues were also the first two albums i ever listened to where i loved every single song on them, and i happened to listen to them for the first time at around the same point in my life (i got into mcr super late. like, 2012 late. rip).

silky; what’s your biggest dream?

it's cheesy but i guess i just want stability and, by extension, happiness. emotional stability, mental stability, financial stability, stable living situation, stable routines, stable relationships... you get the idea. i have ambitions and passions, of course, but my ultimate goal is happiness at this point in my life, and i'm pretty sure stabilizing all those things would go a pretty long way in achieving that goal.

a little apartment with walls i can paint because white walls make me angry. bookshelves and posters and fandom merch on every wall. a computer i can actually play games on again, and somewhere i can paint and draw and record my podcasts. someone who loves me, maybe. a cat, if i'm stable enough. space for people to come visit me, and a place for them to sleep if they need. a tiny balcony, if i really want to shoot for the stars. a job i don't hate. the spoons to hang out with my friends, and the money to not worry about buying little presents for the people i care about sometimes. i don't need much.

strawberry kiss; do you have a crush right now?

nope.

glitter; favorite fictional character?

another loaded question. like books, if you ask me again in five minutes i'll probably give you a different answer. but in this particular moment, caleb and jester from critical role (please don't make me choose between them). i won't go full shipping mode rn, but jester is so funny and silly and sweet, so much more complex than she seems, and she tries so hard to make everyone happy even when she's so sad inside. the healer who treats healing as an inconvenience in battle (she's so fucking valid and also mood), the glue that keeps the party together. and caleb learning to trust again, facing his trauma and coming out of his shell. he loves his friends so much he plays wizard as a support class and i love him so much.

i love the mighty nein in general, of course, and all the guests/honorary members they've had. pumat!! pls don't be evil reani!! keg!! shakäste and grand duchess anastasia!! cali!! kiri!!!! the brotps! empire siblings! chaos crew! nott the best detective agency! i still love molly and all his assholery to bits (fight me), and mourn his lost potential. i adore yasha, even when she's gone; fjord has grown so much; beau and nott and caduceus — i love all their flaws and disagreements and their character arcs and the excitement of watching them grow and learn. but if i had to choose, caleb, jester and molly have always been my top 3 since day 1 and, well, molly isn't really an option anymore.

but like i said, ask me again in a minute. i have a fucking list.

swan; share a quote or passage that means something to you.

a collection of things off the top of my head:

Elinor agreed to it all, for she did not think he deserved the compliment of rational opposition. — Sense and Sensibility, Jane Austen

a tired feminist Mood™️

"What I say is, a town isn't a town without a bookstore. It may call itself a town, but unless it's got a bookstore, it knows it's not foolin' a soul." — American Gods, Neil Gaiman

i got my love of books from my grandma — some of my favorites i got from her. sometimes, as a treat, she used to take my sister and i to bookstores and we'd stay there for ages, getting to pick one out, roaming the shelves, the mental torture of having to choose. the peace of being surrounded by thousands of potential worlds, so much information, so many stories just waiting to be told; being surrounded by strangers who share that same wonder. the anxious drive home so we could read them, being unable to wait that long so i inevitably start reading in the car and make myself sick. telling her in excited detail all my favorite parts. if we were lucky, maybe we got to split a bear claw, or she'd drive past starbucks and get us something there too (tall vanilla soy steamer with one pump of vanilla syrup, whipped cream on top that always melted too quickly and squirted out the hole in the lid, so hot it burned my tongue but so good i didn't care). i have never felt more at home than i do when i'm surrounded by books.

"There are a lot of different types of freedom. We talk about freedom the same way we talk about art, like it was a statement of quality rather than a description. “Art” doesn’t mean good or bad. Art just means art. It can be terrible and still be art. Freedom can be good or bad, too. There can be terrible freedom. You freed me, and I didn’t ask you to." — Alice Isn't Dead, season 1, chapter 2: Alice

as cringey as it is to admit it, this line made me cry a lot after my breakup.

"So you aren't American?" asked Shadow.

"Nobody's American," said Wednesday. "Not originally. That's my point." — American Gods, Neil Gaiman

[side-eyes white america real hard]

there's more, of course. there's always more. don't even get me started on song lyrics, we'll be here all day.

lace; what’s your favorite plant/flower?

lilacs and roses.

mermaid; do you prefer the forest or the ocean? why?

both, i guess. but in different ways, and in different circumstances.

the sea is wild. it is endless and deep and unknowable. it is beautiful and dangerous. i am terrified of the ocean, and yet my favorite place in the world is an empty beach on the oregon coast. i have picked sand from between my toes for days with hair crusted in salt, danced around bonfires and watched the stars while marshmallows burn, gotten pulled under the waves as a child and nearly swept out to sea. picked starfish and crabs from small pools in the rocks, and swum (accidentally) with wild sea lions. in a long skirt, too early in the year to be swimming, i once took off my shoes and waded fully clothed into the water to my waist and just... danced. splashed and kicked and laughed with a boy i barely knew until our throats were sore and our toes were numb, walking home hours later with our soaked clothes clinging to our legs, shoes squelching, dripping algae as we went. the ocean is freeing and overwhelming all at once. i love it and am petrified by it in equal measure.

the forest is beautiful in a different way. it is silent and dense and serene. you are surrounded by life and yet, somehow, completely alone. there is magic in the forest, and history, and even when all else dies, that will remain. the trees grow from the corpses of their ancestors, and some have lived dozens of our lifetimes — with luck, a few dozen more. it is quiet there, peaceful, even the tiniest wood in the middle of a city muffling the outside world through the trees. you can feel the ancient ways deep in your soul as you follow winding paths strewn with fallen leaves, the mystery and wonder and superstitions of your forefathers. you wonder what it would be like, to run your fingers over the moss, to take off your shoes and socks and just run, leaping and dancing over rocks and roots, hair wild and air filling your lungs in deep, pure gulps as you shed the responsibilities and struggles of modern life, for just a moment remembering what freedom tastes like. it is primal, this connection to nature, one we have nearly forgotten over time. and as the sky grows dark and the silence of night presses against you, shadows looming, every footfall deafening, perhaps you begin to understand why some believed in monsters.

honeymoon; do you keep a journal?

i used to. honestly, that's a good idea, i should start doing that again. lord knows i have enough empty journal-type books.

starlight; do you believe in love at first sight and soulmates? why/why not?

i want to. i want to believe there's someone out there for me, the love of my life, someone to whom i'll be the love of their life, and that when i meet them i'll just... know.

but when i met my ex, i didn't really look twice at him for a while — no love at first sight. and when we were together, when i loved him and he swore he loved me back, i thought he hung the stars in the sky and knew i would marry him someday. couldn't even consider the idea that that wouldn't happen. and then when he broke up with me, he ghosted me so suddenly and thoroughly that he even preemptively cut contact with every single one of our mutual friends he thought might side with me in the breakup, before anybody even knew we'd had a fight. so, not soulmates either.

i really want to believe that someday the perfect romance will just fall into place and i can have the happily ever after i've always dreamed of. but the reality is i might never even have another s.o. for the rest of my life. maybe i'll get hit by a car tomorrow, or my hypothetical soulmate moves to argentina to become an alpaca farmer on a mountain somewhere and we never even meet. maybe i'm so traumatized by the betrayal and lies that i'll never have the courage to even try again.

and even so, happily ever after doesn't have to include a fairytale romance, regardless of whether i want it or not. i still like to cling to that hope though, deep down.

princess; what do you value most in people?

i'm going to assume you mean "real people" as in people i have positive relationships with, and not random strangers on the street.

loyalty. kindness. support. humor. similar values. patience. being able to grow together and teach each other things, so we can make each other better. honesty. trust. compassion. confidence. emotional vulnerability. communication. intelligence, or at least a willingness to learn. strength.

#nobody asked me to go this hard and yet here we are #my favorite pasttimes: talking about myself and being pretentious on main #Lady answers stuff #anon good nurse #Lady of Purple's slice of life #ask meme

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