#sometimes living its cool
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Nobody get it NOBODY GETS IT BUT
#BUT IVE BEEN SO HAPPY LATELY#i am happy i got a gf whom i love a lot and#and life seems easier#sometimes living its cool#and Flamengo wins a game and your partner confesses to you and you two get together#it has made my whole year#NOBODY GETS HOW HAPPY I AM#rambles#me and the bad bitch i pulled by being autistic
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Lan Wangji might be an unstoppable force, but Xie Lian has 800+ years of practice of being an immovable object.
(poll results here for context)
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#bonus comic#The most resounding conclusion the community came to agree on is thar Xie Lian is bad at cooking on purpose#and is stubborn to the point of refusing to let go of this feature (not a bug) of himself.#though if you practice being bad at something on purpose you do just…get bad.#Poor lan wangji probably had to watch him do horrendous food crimes in the kitchen.#crushing eggs in his fists and throwing it into the bowl or pan (shell and all).#Burning water. Throwing in ingredients based on the roll of a dice. Putting in leaves and cool rocks he found.#He is living his best life mind you. And I think as long as he is happy then let him make his potions.#This is *his* version of art therapy. It just shouldnt be fed to anyone.#lwj would probably try to make it more theraputic after realizing that the bad cooking skills were on purpose. But even then XL is a rock.#he will not do anything he does not want to. Including processing feelings.#Don't idealize that btw. You will do yourself no favours by ignoring hard emotions. Love and peace everypony; Its a hard world out there.#Hua Cheng and wwx hung out during all of this and have since become hunting buddies.#Sometimes its birds sometimes it's each other. For sport.
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strange old men!! theyre married for tax purposes (and gay purposes but thats less important)
[image description: a drawing of human designs for coach z and bubs from homestar runner. coach z is depicted as a lanky pale-skinned older man with a tooth gap, a five-o'clock shadow, and balding curly light brown hair with a grey streak through it. bubs is depicted as a bulky, dark-skinned older man with short greying afro hair and a short beard. end id]
#bubs is totally hiding some tattoos from his Cool Guy Days under that sweater#also to me he is blind in his right eye#also also its Sorta implied through jokes?? but to me coach z is intersex#they get divorced sometimes for fun. then they get remarried so they can keep getting wedding gifts#the ultimate scheme#i think that means i only have 5 main cast members left#i am wondering if i should make the cheat a human. or if he should be a weird cat or something#hes got human intelligence obviously but sb still calls him a pet so idk#i guess i can just. ignore that#he can be sb and sm's weird bestie that basically lives w them#doc talks#my art#homestar runner#hsr#h*r#coach z#bubs#bubz#today has been a very productive day of drawing homestar runner characters
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I tried so hard to selfship that it made me realize that I was aegosexual, and that's somethin man
#aegosexual#shit forced me out a more comedicallt smaller and thinner closet#im sure im aroace on some level i just dont care to define it#dont think ive ever loved...just a single crush in my almost 18 yrs of living#and that shit is rapidly fading and making me realize that im only attracted to their body#god im so shitty lmao#like sex and sexuality ic cool just dont involve me please#not even repulsed per say just imagining myself in any way like that just....#whats and opposite of an aphrodisiac#anaphrodisiac. googled ig#literally neutralizes#in a split second#maybe its bc im insecure or gender issues thag i cannot and maybe imwhen i staft hrt i might#but its almost funny how it is#sometimes i feel like a surface level fuckboy loser who will never love
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What exactly are living gods in the blightseed universe?
Ok here's the (DANGEROUSLY vestigial at this point) Meta Deeplore:
There is a material form of energy that is utilized by biological bodies essentially as an animating force. This IS the vaguely defined, extremely ambiguous magic in the setting. It is what produces the actual experience of Consciousness and can be basically considered 1:1 with conscious experience. All life utilizes this energy (whether actually conscious life in the traditional sense or not).
It cannot be created or destroyed, and rather follows pathways of dispersal between one material plane and a parallel plane. This parallel plane is 'the ether' 'the dreamlands' etc, and has its own matter. Discrete entities from the dreamlands are essentially formed as a byproduct of consciousness and, when interacted with, are deeply susceptible to the influence of conscious Thought (they are essentially matter organized By consciousness and can be reorganized by consciousness)
These are the entities that can become living gods. Dreamlands fauna occasionally slips into prime material reality, at which point they are directly under the influence of consciousness and can be transformed. Dreamlands fauna in of itself is not directly perceivable but produces a sense of Presence, like the feeling of being watched when alone in the wilderness, a 'third man effect', a sense of inexplicable awe or fear, seeing shadows from the corner of your eye, etc. The combination of their tangible effects and their susceptibility to consciousness creates a self-reinforcing cycle that produces living gods.
IE: if one is on a forest and people experience the sensation of its presence, belief that there is some entity there may develop. This will follow the lines of the cultural worldview- say there are already beliefs in spectral hounds that encounter travelers at night, it might be interpreted as a location-specific hound, given a name and identity through stories. This in turn causes the dreamlands fauna to physically embody that form and the assumed qualities, and people will start having absolute materially real encounters with it, thus reinforcing the initial beliefs that created it and generating new elements of the mythology. This is what a living god is.
They need persistent, localized, and coherent beliefs to hold their forms. If a village creates a living god and is then wiped out in a disaster, the god will gradually lose its form and return to its initial state of a sense of Presence. This is also a limiting factor on the 'size' and power of a living god, if an entire religion formed around it and became a widespread phenomena, the living god itself cannot 'keep up'. It is sustained on direct and localized interactions, so belief becoming widely dispersed (especially if the localized belief is lost) will cause it to gradually become less discrete. The effect of this property is that living gods are almost always minor deities or spirits tied to a specific location by a specific nearby culture. A lot of deities in larger religions may have once had a living god component that is now indiscrete.
The living god of the Ur-tree is an unusual exception in that it was created over millennia, basically by the survival instincts of the Plants it interacts with, and has held its form over hundreds of millions of years due to this being ubiquitous and un-susceptible to cultural change. The only thing that could 'kill it' is if its forest was entirely destroyed.
So 99% of living gods can be described as thoughtforms created by the process of folkloric/religious development. They are created BY people and not the other way around, and nothing about their nature confirms or denies the existence of other deities or etc.
And yeah I'm going to be 100% real I am REALLY tempted to dump even this extremely ambiguous magical element like it is soooooooooooooooo fucking NOT important to the setting at this point. I've kind of allowed 'literal god entities created by mortal belief' to be just a tiny part of the world's fabric by their nature, like it works within the worldbuilding for such a hugely significant concept to ultimately be insignificant in the overall framework, so I COULD just Leave It but idk. If it were not for me wanting to still have my big fucking god tree and a talking dog as an actual character it would be out of here soooo fast..........
#And see I can see ways out of it without fully destroying the concepts like. I would fully lose my talking dog but could still#have the Ur-Tree exist in a similar (but perhaps less cool) capacity with like a Very Special Fungus that has maintained#a stable ecosystem over a very long geological scale.#Most of the established lore of specific living gods could continue to exist as folklore. It's already a thing that I avoid#confirming or denying any religious outlook and don't want to establish religions that are 'More Correct' than others#(I kind of don't like that dichotomy that sometimes comes up in fantasy settings with Confirmed deities.)#Just gonna say if the concept stops coming up altogether do not be surprised.#Like initially this setting was just a mass dumping ground for ideas but now that it's pretty heavily developed it has too much of its own#identity and rules for me to just do whatever. And 'canon' supernatural elements don't really have a place.#Every supernatural component of this setting getting whacked 1 by 1. The outro to 'Layla' playing in the background.#Press F.
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i love you pokken aegislash
#THEYRE SO SILLY IN POKKEN#GET IT GRAMPA GET THAT SHARP FORME!!!!#im still salty that my friend’s cousin has pokken dx and he constantly rubs it in my face#when i get my hands on that game i swear i will throw you in a mix up so bad youll forget your cardinal directions#anyways#hey guys did you know I LOVE AEGISLASG AEGISLASH IS MY FAVORITE POKEMON EVER I LOVE AEGISLASH I LIVE FOR THE HONEDGE LINE I LOVE EM SM!!!!#all platonic btw#hehe#anonslash's ramblings#aegislash#pokken tournament#DONT GET ME STARTED ON THEIR INTRO ANIMATIONS#THE WAY THEY LIERALLY SPIN INTO BATTLE AND GIVE OUT THE MOST GRAMPA CHUCKLE EVER#i lvoe tjem so much#AND AND AND#THEIR WIN ANIMS R SO COOL… ESPECIALLY THE BURST VICTORY ONE#THE LOSING ANIM TOO- ITS ALRIGHT GRAMPA.. ITS GOOD TO GET THESE BONES(?) WARMED UP SOMETIMES#im really normal about them yeah. i love my boy girl and enby sword pokemon
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just finished s5 of twd... can someone just tell me what happened?
like i enjoy the show bc its kinda easy to have in the bg... but also like i find (other than the prison x woodbury arc) there is rarely any like... plot...
#no hate to the show#its just sometimes hard to really see where everything is going#i get that its showing how ppl would live in an apocalypse but also its a tv show and should have a plot through seasons and series yknow?#like not to compare it to my pookie tlou...#but like they had a clear goal / objective pretty much the whole time (get ellie to the fireflies/find tommy)#this one its like wow we found a town and here is some random political drama#like sure but for a whole season??#like prison/woodbury slayed bc there was a clear antagonist and plotlines#idk if im being too picky...#wildlywatches <3#wildlywatches <3 the walking dead#the walking dead#twd#also the random sickness during prison arc just for that never to be brought up again#i thought it wouldve been so cool to have like super-zombies or smth
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i’m so pressured with improving myself as an artist and it’s making me lose it because i’m not even doing art for my career but i love it so much. Like i kinda feel useless doing it sometimes, especially since i see other artists and i know damn well i will never achieve that level and im not saying this for people to feel pity but idk i feel like my art style doesn’t fit tr.???3! or like idk. Sometimes i’ll literally cry because i feel like my art style doesn’t fit rindou and she’s literally my muse, she’s the reason why i get so excited to sit down and draw everyday yet i feel like im just stuck sitting somewhere where i can’t do anything special to show my love for her and it sounds silly.. bc that’s a fictional character but still, ive liked this character for so long and i see improvement just from drawing rindou non stop but i still feel like im just barely touching the surface of improvement. Also i feel like i care too much about what others may like vs what i want to try and draw.. i want to draw her raw and literally how i perceive her, her character, her body, every single aspect of her and why she’s so important to me. Yet i can’t do that because i get so scared of the outcome/how my artwork looks/ how others will perceive it. And im not saying im not happy with my art, i am but there’s just ways i want to do it i feel like wont stick out to others which scares me or it will seem ooc of rindou. literally because of this i always have the urge to delete my account and restart and continue doing that till i feel like i perfected her yet i dont think that’ll ever happen even with how much love i have for that character
#this sounds fucking crazy just lock me up#this is a dumb rant#but it’s been on my mind for so long and i wanted to say it here since i’m a bit more comfortable on tumblr (barely)#i think i compare myself way too much with other artists who i guess draw characters crazy hot or smrh😭😭LOL which is like yeah duh everyone+#is gonna love that#but i don’t like drawing that stuff..!! at all yet i try sometimes because i know ppl like it but im like eughhh..#i dunno. Maybe it’s also because i just don’t see rindou as a dude so that fucks me over at the same time#i liked rindou ever since ???? the stupid ass debut just because i thought her design was cool#and i’m still not happy how i can’t draw her like how i would like to#at the same time i am but i know damn well im rlly not#which is why i always try to draw her with scenery or just doing simple things i dunno.. i think its sweet. I want to see her just live#and i feel like im very repetitive with my art which im trying to be less of but its hard obviously no matter how much i practice ill +#still want to draw how i’m used to
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Say what you want about the downsides of having a lot of followers on Tumblr but one cool thing about it is that sometimes I can see a lots-of-notes-worthy post with only a few notes on it and just go "is anyone else gonna bring this to the masses" and not wait for an answer
#ive done this on multiple occasions now lol and it never stops being fun#sometimes theyre posts that i may not have even reblogged otherwise#but when i recognize a post with tumblr-fame vibes i must do my duty to bring it to the people. i live to serve 🫡#rambling#...dropping the act of pretending to be full of myself it just makes me happy to help (curse?) people with notes lol#also i just figured out how reblog graphs work and as a numbers person who works in excel for fun its so cool to quantify my reblogs lol#just checked a post i recently reblogged at 10 notes which is now at over 4k#and i was able to see that out of 200 reblogs all but 13 of them can be traced back to mine lol#adventuretime_mathematical!.gif
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I’m so normal about my wife
#she lives in my head rent free#literally!#and I’m in hers#cause bodily it’s the same noggin#being married alters is weird idk if it’s Norma#it’s cool sometimes! but then there’s times like now where I REALLY wanna hug her#cause hugging lovely wife is like… the best thing ever invented for so many reasons that’d take too long to explain#but I can’t cause we’re both stuck getting rotated in the other’s mind.#ITS BOTH TORTURE AND AMAZING AND I JUST AUGH I WANNA HUG AND KISS HER SO BAC#But she is very pretty and I have so many mental pictures of her and can talk to her whenever I want#so it’s a win#system booting…
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I like to to think mcs who wouldnt fall into the conventionally attractive category getting shooked when multiple demons find them attractive
#and i dont mean in a 'ur scary looking' way#unless thats what the person reading this would want of course#but uk theres kinda a look thats in right now#so what if its different in the devildom?#i would hope they arent constrained to a super strict beauty standard like humans tend to be#like they are more willing to engage with a variety of features#if that makes sense#its kinda like how ud think someone is gorgeous but society says the opposite#so ur definition of attractive is more broad in a sense#but i wanna take that thinking and apply that to a whole country lol#of course everyone still has their own preferences but theyre still very open to other things#like i prefer pancakes over waffles but i still like both of them and sometimes i want waffles more#anyways i think this would be cool u know#like 'wow i never got this much attention before this is almost jarring'#obey me#obey me nightbringer#the idea is interesting and i think it would make sense!#if uve lived long enough i feel like ud be more flexible right?? cause youve had more exposure and experiences to different people#i mean the brothers all liking mc regardless of looks could be good proof#theyre very different in personality but they all still find mc good looking#what i guess im trying to say is that demons in general are more versatile when it comes to looks or something like that#see how i said looks#cause they still be hating on angels and humans#tbh im giving this game more credit than i should#but i think the idea would at least be interesting to consider
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Iroh in this adaptation is still as lovely as ever. Hot & cute old man.
#look at him he’s wonderful!#just like knowing what we know now in hindsight#it’s so fun to watch him interact with everyone#he’s just such a cool guy#I know I’m using these posts to point out a lot of issues but it’s got its charming moments too ngl#my partner & I are enjoying it & laughing at it sometimes xD#I think Iroh is one of my favorite parts of this show much like the original#he’s just a very pleasant guy!#mine#op#avatar the last airbender#avatar live action#avatar#natla#atla#netflix avatar
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How do you find motivation ??
Like, if I'm drawing, I lose interest quite quickly and then just never continue it.
Bad habit, how do you prevent that from happening ??
it's usually either bc (A) there's something missing in the fanwork out there and i have to fill the gap, e.g. i wanna depict a character a certain way or draw a niche self-indulgent AU, or (B) i got a LOT of feelings and need to exorcise the demons from my body somehow!!
i think motivation has to come from why you wanna draw... for me, it's because i want to share what i like/appreciate/feel about media! it's hard for me to just. bring it up in conversation, even with close friends... so i draw it instead, bc it's the way i'm most comfortable expressing my enthusiasm. there's lots of different reasons for wanting to draw (original/fan story only you can tell! wanted to find other people who feel the way you do! need to earn income! just wanted to make a cool picture! also needed to exorcise demons from your body!!), and it's OK if it's not "deep" or anything, but it's definitely something you have to find for yourself
#ASK EVER#i also have to add. its totally cool and normal to abandon works lol#i post maybe 40% of the things i actually draw. got a healthy sized abandoned wip pile back here just like everyone else#you can always come back to it!! or do something else!! no effort is wasted effort when it comes to art u make from earnestness#also sometimes ur friends just have different interests and you cant live with watching their eyes politely glaze over again#so you have to draw 200+ xv pictures in two years to exorcise the demons. yeah
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silly idea time
idk how this idea even started but the outfit i had in mind was way back from a doodle in 2021 or 2022, basically my 'what if' for temperance ending only instead of being wildly ooc and wearing a collared button up johnny becomes a cowboy. and because i was listening to vagrant song from wtwtlw (that whole ost really, and hardspace shipbreaker) i had the bright idea that johnny would finally become what his class in the ttrpg was an homage to and wander around collecting stories n telling them n kind of being a dead man walking/ghost story/witness/helper-bard r smthn but having been extremely tempered by the experience of v choosing to die for him, being shocked enough into actually thinking about his beleifs n what have you, humbled enough now to want to listen to others hed choose this path of wandering the continent of na, maybe for the first time in a long time actually taking in life around him yadda yadda. in my little scenario i also had it that even if/when the next corpo war broke out or the nusa annexed more free states, he wouldnt get involved like he used to, cause i think its interesting to muse on how a profound experience would greatly change someone so stuck in their ways like johnny. i think hed still be motivated by guilt and avoidance at first, but it would evolve into something more like a calling/altruism as he takes more seriously and uses more intentionally the time he was given as a dead man walking
also i realize how much of this 'outfit' is just putting v in a hat and calling them johnny like its some perry the platypus thing (also idk how to draw hats)
#plus i think itd be cool to see how johnny comes to the realization he can make small changes and that those matter#and that he was a little erroneously trying to move too many mountains at once in his first life#and that he was a little too much there just for the destructive violence and maybe not for better reasons#cyberpunk 2077#my v#johnny silverhand#yeah and morality pet steve guy would not be a thing its far too cliche im sorry johnny would not fucking do all that#my doodles#plus i think he was a bit disconnected as a rockstar/edgerunner from like... the toils#even tho he liked to talk about the grander toils and lived some specific toils but like getting more connected with the peoples toils#in a psuedo americana esque wasteland that is the middle of the former nusa#ghost story in the sense he doesnt leave much anything behind that ppl could follow or really describe n such things#besides like stories or conversations or helping out where its needed#also think itd be interesting for him to completely reevaluate what justice means in a world like this#fun stuff! i should draw out that sketch of him sitting with a coyote sometime...#nomad but like not in the clan way
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brain not braining, write not writing, the horrors of being gay and having ethel cain as ur #1 on spotify, my dog walking away as im trying to pet her, my bb fanfic remaining untouched for several weeks
#i dont have spotify but i say i do so i dont get shamed for using apple music#i check my own writing sometimes to see if it has updated itself#what do u mean i have to put in the work#riding 5 horses a day and getting windburn from the freezing air is not v cool#its so damn cold where i live rn#waiting for motivation cus my big bang fic is a lil dry rn#lgbtq#ethel cain#warrior nun#avatrice
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thank god for indie devs making like tiny little maximum 10 megabyte freeware games on itchio keeping the art of filesize optimization alive. ASSET REUSE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#im watching a video about wario land music -> 'the bizarre music and sound design of wario land 4' by geno7#good video so far! i like this guys stuff. he talked a bit about how they did some of the sound effects for warios voice#a very like. chopped and remixed sample style of doing his vocal lines. which is very cool 1) because it saves a bit of#precious space on that gba cartridge BUT ALSO 2) it just sounds cool and interesting stylistically#and man sometimes trying to keep a file size down really does give way for some really interesting stuff#on my own personal interests in games i ADORE rpg makers rtp and how people can find creative uses for it#i love that a bunch of games can draw from the same asset pool as one install on ur computer#no bloating your hardrive with a bunch of copies of the same assets - its just already here!#and from a developers perspective i love when they reuse old assets from other games in new weird ways#some small visual novel companies will reuse backgrounds and other assets#altho i dont mind a bit of bloat with VNs since a big draw can be the big pretty images and big pretty sounds#but its still cool when people find ways to get creative with space saving. and from a players perspective its also nice#space is cheap nowadays. but its not Free. we can swallow terabytes whole with micro sds and everything#but a lot of players dont get the chance or ability to upgrade their internal memory that often. so i think being considerate of filesize i#very important. and thats not even getting into the download bandwidth limits - a lot of people all across north america can only get like#internet from 1 provider and that 1 provider often likes to upcharge and limit shit because they can#we might live in a future where a lot of powerful technology exists. but access to that tech is another story#so remember the filesize. remember the filesize.#dies in your arms
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