#i check my own writing sometimes to see if it has updated itself

[locallysourcedshuggy]

brain not braining, write not writing, the horrors of being gay and having ethel cain as ur #1 on spotify, my dog walking away as im trying to pet her, my bb fanfic remaining untouched for several weeks

[babsvibes]

I just rewatched Logan's episodes, and is it just me or is it weird that he seems to reset every episode he's in? Even when he and the Belchers end an episode off on good terms by the next ep he's in, he's right back to being hostile.

Thank you for sending! My power was knocked out in a storm, so this was a nice distraction 💕

It could have to do with the nature of a sitcom. Bob’s Burgers is an episodic situational comedy where the characters stay the same while we watch them react to situations. It’s more typical for the world to reset with a loose continuity, so we get to have multiple holiday episodes without the Belchers aging in tandem, Tina sometimes has stage fright and sometimes doesn’t, and characters we thought learned their lesson don’t.

Hostile is an interesting word to use, though to your point Logan refers to his own feelings as hostility in Large Brother. I think you might get more mileage out of “antagonistic” in a conversation analyzing his behavior because it coincides with his role.

Because Logan’s role in the sitcom is to be an antagonist, he will act antagonistically. In serial storytelling (where the plot builds on itself and usually has a more linear timeline), he might learn or grow over time, but in our current canon unless one of the writers wants to give him a permanent heel-face-turn then he’ll likely remain the antagonist.

Take how the Belchers acted in season one for example. In seasons three and four, we see them flip from this slightly edgier, aggressive tone to one that’s more lighthearted. This isn’t because the characters grew but because the show and writing team shifted directions. Fan-favorite characters like Fischoeder and Zeke appear more because of audience perception and in turn their personalities are more palatable to the Belchers than in their first introduction to explain their continued presence.

If you want to hear me talk an annoying amount about Logan’s character and his role in the show, you can read here or check out my presentation here (I….. yeah), though it’s not updated with Jade in the Shade info just yet.

[kirby-souljourney-au]

Welcome to Kirby: Soul Journey!

Hello!! My name is Bugthing, I use he/xey/it/they pronouns, and I am the mod of this account. This is a sideblog made very specifically for all things regarding my Kirby AU, Soul Journey! I store whatever Kirby-related content I make here, including a project I’ve been working on since the 20th of December, 2022.

If you’ve been following me for long enough, whether here or on my main blog (@goblinbugthing), you know very well what that is, but for the new people, allow me to introduce you to the biggest project I have ever worked on in my entire life…

The Kirby: Soul Journey AU fic!

As I said before, this has been in progress since 2022, and it is currently unfinished. I had put the fic itself on hiatus for months before I said anything, though the announcement of the hiatus itself was only posted in November 2023.

At the time, I had been working on chapter 2, and eventually gave up on it entirely because it wasn’t living up to my (unreasonably high) expectations.

However, soon after I announced the hiatus, I decided I would be rewriting the entire fic from scratch.

And that brings us to where we are today! The rewrite is in progress, research is being done, changes are being made, and I’m slightly more confident in my writing than before. So, make sure to check in with the blog every now and then to see any updates!

Everything else, under the cut!

(Divider gif via @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more)

Stats:

Currently on hiatus.

Due to the pending (and incredibly terrifying) results of the 2024 US election, I am too anxious and paranoid to do any work. Hiatus will last until I know my life is no longer at risk.

Chapter in progress: None

Asks: Open

Send in anything regarding the AU! I love answering questions!

Ref sheet masterlist doc here! [Unfinished — we’ve got a LOT to go]

I must add that ArtShield desaturates the colours slightly after shielding, so please reference the hex codes written down in the post for the correct colours!

Voice claim masterlist doc is readable here!

Chapter Index

IT RETURNS. (Teaser A) (AO3 / Wattpad)

The Destruction. (Teaser B) (AO3 / Wattpad)

A Reaper’s Blade (Prologue) (AO3 / Wattpad)

Read the Original (VERY OUTDATED) (AO3 / Wattpad)

Teaser A - The True Ultimate Life-Form (Tumblr ver.)

Teaser B - Threat to the Multiverse (Tumblr ver.)

Prologue - Preparations (Tumblr ver.)

Chapter 1 - Return of One and Introduction to Another (Tumblr ver.)

Read the Oneshots (ALSO VERY OUTDATED) (AO3 / Wattpad)

MERCY (Tumblr ver.)

Hold the Stars (Tumblr ver.)

Taboo (Tumblr ver.)

Exile (Tumblr ver.)

Once So Great (Tumblr ver.)

Awaken (Tumblr ver.)

Gentle Angel (Tumblr ver.)

Righteous Anger (non-canon) (Tumblr ver.)

Comics

Wanderer’s Curiosity (OUTDATED)

If any of the links are broken, please let me know! I'll get to fixing them right away!

Tag Key

#sincerely - mod bugthing — Posts from me, the mod, ranging from nonsense to progress updates.

#k:sj au — Things generally regarding the AU itself (e.g. voice claims, character refs, worldbuilding).

#k:sj voices — Character voice claims.

#k:sj characters — Character reference sheets.

#dreamland’s mailbox — Any asks you send in.

#dreamland’s polls — Any polls I make here.

#dreamland art exhibit — Original art regarding the AU.

#not k:sj canon — Things not canonical to the AU (e.g. what if scenarios, crossovers).

#not soul journey / other aus — Posts unrelated to K:SJ, and/or other people’s AUs.

#kirby: soul journey — Actual, real, canonical, proper chapters and oneshots.

I tag triggers with #cw: (trigger)

I tag OCs with #oc: (character)

Please note that this section may be updated in the future.

Socials

YouTube (I rarely upload, but I do use community posts sometimes)

Wattpad (My fanfics’ second home)

Archive Of Our Own (All my fics live here)

TikTok (The impulsive thoughts won. Rarely ever used)

$$app (Consider supporting me by donating)

Ko-Fi (Commissions opening soon!)

DNI list

Pr0shippers

NSFW blogs

TERFs

Transphobes, homophobes, racists, ableists, sexists, misogynists, antisemites, zionists, etc.

H4rry P0tter fans

D4nganronpa-specific blogs

People in support of the genocide against Palestine

AI-generated anything supporters

H4zbin H0tel & H3lluva B0ss fans

M3tasusie shippers

For now, that appears to be it! Have a good day, and enjoy your time in Dreamland!

— Mod Buggie

[spire-pod]

▲ Audio Drama Recommendations - Week One!

Happy #AudioDramaSunday! Just in time for our first proper newsletter release! We've got a handful of sci-fi shows we'd like to recommend, as well as a full review of our favourite listen of the week to check out! If you'd like to stay updated on our show and see our weekly recs, you can sign up to our newsletter here!

This week, we’re rounding up a handful of other hard sci-fi shows that we’re a fan of. If you like Spire, odds are, you’ll like these guys too!

@station151podcast follows Antartica’s first and only astronomical radio observatory. Great pace, atmosphere and concept. I’ll always eat up AI characters (SPIRE audiences do not interact) and research station astronomy will always have a special place in my heart.

@wirelandranch is cosmic horror at its best. It’s sci-fi in the broadest sense, combining Americana with the psychedelic. Great sound design and certainly immersive. Sometimes I don’t know where I am when I listen to this. That’s good.

Edict Zero is a super unique cyber noir adventure. The sound design is literally crazy, and if you’re a fan of a bangin’ soundtrack (you are, you know it), you will certainly enjoy this. Cinematic, immersive. Slay. 

And, our final recommendation is a show I’ve had the pleasure of listening to for the first time this week, @chainofbeing! Read our full review under the cut :))

Chain Of Being is a science fiction, narrative podcast, though honestly, I’d classify it as toeing the line of Weird Fiction, which is the greatest compliment I could give, considering it’s my absolute favourite genre. I will always adore a show that isn’t afraid to take itself to strange, unique places, and Chain Of Being commits one-hundred-percent to its atmosphere. It’s not the kind of show where you can just sit back and listen, it encourages you to meet it at its level, which I’ve found can be rare — especially in an age where most media will spoon feed you information — but very, very welcome.

Conceptually, the show is very strong. I love the combination of high Biblical concepts with hard sci-fi. It creates a deeply immersive atmosphere that you can lose yourself in, while still using just enough cues for a modern audience to enfold themselves in the world without too much separation. Its unique setting makes it stand out in the world of AD, and that’s only improved by the stellar sound design. Especially the first few remastered episodes are so deeply atmospheric and sonically unique, it feels greatly cinematic. The acting is great, and all voices are distinct and well characterised — which is often important in AD, especially one as high-concept as this, when the audience has so much to pay attention to. The writing is also clearly aware of the audience — knowing exactly what to do to engage them, while still respecting that they will do the work to fill in the blanks.

Highly recommend a listen, especially since their second season is in the works. Chain Of Being stands out in the landscape of audio drama as a great show. They’re crowdfunding this month too, so if you’re interested, definitely check out their own page here!

[klug]

Puyo Puyo Puzzle Pop Final Story Impressions

This is a repost of something from privatter for my Twitter. I think my opinions are about the same as most fans, it's mostly negative/disappointment.

⚠️ Mostly negative opinions. I will focus on the overall game experience first and then story.

> Good points

I loved the final boss battle BGM. It was really really good.

This game has so many side stories that I love because they explore aspects of the characters that aren't touched on much, so I can't really hate it. Ally and Rafisol have my favorite side stories, but I'm also fond of Klug and Risukuma's.

A lot of the main stories are also really good, Ecolo and Accord's specifically.

This game has a wonderful presentation and I can tell the devs poured a lot of their love into this game. The amount of collectibles and flavor text and attention to detail for the shadow battles also made me so happy.

---

> Bad points

The online and various bugs in this game all just make this game very hard to play sometimes...it's good if you have a lot of people to play with locally, I guess.

The platform exclusivity and update schedule, but I don't really need to go into why these weren't good.

The translation quality was inconsistent in several places and there should've been more quality checking. I'm not sure if the translators just never cross referenced each other's work, but it was so weird to go from very well translated stories to ones that just got subjects wrong or made ridiculous inferences that weren't in the original.

---

Onto my feelings on the story...

It is about what I expected, but somehow it's worse than what I expected. As the main stories continued, I noticed there was no true plot progression and most of the newer episodes were dedicated to reiterating information that the players should've already known or inferred from earlier stories. At that point, I accepted the ending wouldn't be anything spectacular despite how incredible the beginning chapters were, but the ending was abrupt, everything felt too easy, and there were a few developments that didn't feel foreshadowed at all.

Why did not!Sig want to control the dream world anyway? We didn't see anything of this plan in Satan or Ecolo's stories either. How could it have only taken 2 Puyo battles with Amitie to beat Sig, anyway? He (and Strange Klug!) are treated as ridiculously powerful characters, and Sig's Secret shows this too. Why did the ending only involve Satan, Ecolo, Arle, and Ringo -- people who really aren't as close to Sig as his own classmates? Why weren't Accord or Lemres there after being so heavily involved with Sig and Meena?

It felt like they just needed to slap an ending onto this story somehow. And Sig's story itself was even somewhat of a letdown for me. I thought it was very very funny, but I was a bit sad to see that we didn't get to see anything very interesting after Meena took some of his powers. It felt like there was seven supposed to be a chapter between Sig and the final chapter focusing on not!Sig and what he was doing because, let's be honest, he barely showed up. The fact that he wanted to control the dream world was very sudden and only came out at the very end.

I think all of this just hurts more because I've always really liked Sig, Amitie, and the crimson spirit and their connections lore wise so I was excited to see it touched on in more detail but...we don't really have anything new now. A lot of this story felt like a combination of the novels "Everyone's Dreams Coming True?!" And "Sigs Secrets", both which I honestly like better than Puzzle Pop.

The amount of lore drops and teasing with the crimson spirit also just hurt me more. I'm very dedicated to her as a character ,so it felt like they were just showing her off only to pull out the rug from under me by not actually involving her in the story...? This is entirely a tunnel vision take, but I do think it is hard to write a story like this without being more explicit about the fact she exists...

I hope this story at least creates a point for them to jump off from in the future since the scattered lore in audio dramas/books is more consolidated here, but it feels like this is how they're ending this subplot with Sig and I'm not sure how I feel about it. Because my aforementioned favorite ends up getting the short end of the stick.

[wormhole2anywhere]

Attention passengers, this is your conductor speaking!

Thank you for choosing Monochrome Railway. My name is Ray and I will be accompanying you for the ride. First, let us review safety precautions when boarding the train, whether it's for a single specific trip to a station or a recurring trip from one station to another.

Safety Checks (Rules):

I do not mind which passengers board this train, as I do not feel obligated to exclude those people whose views are different than mine as long as they pertain to a bare minimum set, in which case I will as swiftly as possible procure the continuation of a safe space in which to consume my works, I will take the liberty to take necessary measures if the situation arises.

Continuing from the first point, I am not to be held responsible for the possible outcome of interactions stemming from my own activity that are not directly related to me. Though I have my own views (which you can consult further down), I am used to separating art from artist to a certain degree, as such, there is a possibility yo end up seeing content from accounts you do not approve of.

Anyone is free to interact as long as they remain civil. This one doesn't need much explanation, I enjoy the attention my posts might get, and as a result I enjoy seeing what people think of my content as long as they behave.

Content will be warned accordingly for the sake of the consumer, please let me know if I ever miss a content warning, but do so tastefully.

With the safety checks out of the way, allow me to state frankly my own views that can and will affect the content shown in here:

I am not a proshipper. I know people exist with different views than I, and I let them be, however, content that is excluded in a non-proship view will not be present in a positive manner.

I reserve the right to not avoid the content excluded by the point above if it is mandatory for setting purposes. I will never paint it in a positive light because I do not find enjoyment from it, however, I find that in certain cases it is mandatory to address things vital to a story that are not tasteful in my views for the sake of narrative.

I may write spoilers of storylines I know the full extent of. People who are spoiler avoidant will be warned in the post itself, however, sometimes points that may be deemed spoilers might be vital for my works.

I mostly write and draw about my hyperfixations. I cannot be tied to a lone specific piece of content unless my mind is very into it, so content may change drastically over time.

This Monochrome Railway line has no specific set destination, however, stations it might stop in are:

Gear Station: It is not a rare occurrence to see the Subway Bosses when you come along for a ride in Monochrome Railway, as connections and partnerships made sure to anchor this train to at least monthly visits to that station.

Puyo Puyo/Madou Monogatari Station: Just as frequently as Gear Station, Puyo Puyo/Madou Monogatari are often frequented mostly for the sake of meeting an appointment with a certain horned devil.

Orsterra & Solistia Joint Station: White-haired clerics and dark-haired scholars keep the train from omitting this station on occasion, it may be accompanied by dirty blond little lambs in need of guidance.

Pokémon Station: Separate from Gear Station due to its more general nature, Monochrome Railway occasionally visits the Pokémon World as a whole.

Zenithian Station: Though this one is lately more in the back-burner, it is expected this station is revisited soon, as the various worlds in need of heroes to slay dragons and do quests are soon to have a few new interesting additions.

That will be the full line for now! If new stations were to arise, this post will be updated accordingly, so keep an eye out for a possible update on the Information Board!

As a last addition, this conductor will be working on extensive guides of both preferred content and original content for better navigation. As soon as it is finished it will be linked so as to ensure you learn how to navigate the various contents each station may produce.

Thank you for reading until the endstaying until the end of this announcement! Without further ado, let us aim for victory! All aboard!

[fidenciocryptidcreechur]

Gonna make this my pinned post and or masterlist

Will update as i get to it

Help sites

Post of resources (USA and international)

I'm Fidencio, he/him 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ 20+

Just be polite, i don't really have a do-not-interact or DNI list. I just block folks if they're transphobic, racist or something. I guess that's my DNI list and rules:

Don't hate people for arbitrary reasons and don't incite violence/hate.

This blog is basically for anything and everything. From sfw to nsfw. This blog itself isn't focused on anything in particular however i can't say the same for most of the folks i reblog from so be sure to check that OP's do-not-interact list.

All i can say is curate your own online experience and if something you see isn't your vibe then block button is free plus there's a function to block tags and even content

i will say that if i end up reblogging something of yours that you didn't want me to reblog then please let me know as well as which post it was, i don't always pay attention to who posts what (sometimes i just see a funny or intriguing post and reblog) and it's easy to lose a post in my blog.

Asks are unlikely to put on anonymous mode and that's mostly because i am of the stance that if someone's going to come chat on this little stage then we're both going to be under the spotlight, that's only fair. I like knowing who I'm chatting to plus too many folks seem to act way too rude when they have on the mask of an anon

personal writing/fics master list

Current interests:

Twisted Wonderland

Sky child

Dungeon meshi

Homicipher

Interests I've always had:

Isopods, sea slugs, moths, jumping spiders, dinosaurs, Dunkleosteus

Marine facts

Anything to do with nature or organic or biological sciences

Art (especially creature designs)

Monster fics

Yandere fics

Current Energy Level:

Normal

- kinda back on my bullshit

-small talk

-we balling for real for real

Tags

Fiden rants- it's on the tin. I rant a bit

Shenanigans- anything a bit silly and entertaining. Usually just odd and silly. Usually physical. Generally should be "unnecessary" but fulfilling in some way

Ideas- makes me think thoughts, makes me think about writing or drawing, ideas really

Being nosy- i need to look into this

Things to do/things to say- very broad genre of stuff that seems either interesting or funny or with a message or a doable activity or interaction.

Enrichment- activity to think about

Mental health- deemed helpful to mental health in some way

Notifications:

YES

Askbox

Open, sometimes i doodle depending on time/mood and also what the ask interaction is lol

Fic recs/ read it please/ recommended posts

Pomefioredove's comfort fic for awkward reader

Sol's kalim x reader fic (so good so fucking good omg)

And remember

poem by Caitlin Seida

[spider-phoenix]

Tagging 🕸️ Guide

posted 02/06/23

updated 02/06/23

All tags intended for navigation on this blog will be prefaced with 🕸️:

Tags that are for reach won't have this.

All tags - minus the content warnings - have been added to this post, so feel free to click on them and browse.

Navigation

🕸️: watercolour

🕸️: spiderfire

🕸️: fantasize

🕸️: sketchbook

🕸️: spider-totems

🕸️: order up

🕸️: talk2me

🕸️: offtopic

Content Warnings

TW: suggestive

TW: canon violence

TW: iamgay

TW: angst

TW: cringe

all applicable posts will have the correct community label, if you believe a post has been mistagged feel free to shoot me a message.

Explanations for each below the cut ⊹

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽ ♫ ☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Navigation

Theories and commentary on the movies in relation to the art style, animation techniques, colour theory, and general composition. Doesn't include lore related theories unless they specifically relate to these ideas.

Art and writing for my spidersona ! Check out his intro post for more info (coming soon)

Writing for the characters, mostly featuring trans readers. I write for male characters and readers more often than others, but I'm willing to switch it up. Headcanons will also show up under this tag.

Fanart for the show and characters, featuring canon spiders only. Comic characters or beta designs may be featured, and posts including both a canon spider and a spidersona can have this tag.

Fanart and writing for all spidersona's outside of my own, including requests, commissions, fan projects, and gifts for friends.

Completed requests ! I do fully custom mood / still boards (including all original images + art), fanart, short writing, and a few other misc things.

Asks or submissions of any kind, as well as reblogs of posts tagging me or other instances of me communicating with my mutuals or followers.

Self explanatory, off topic posts. Although rare for this blog, these posts may include updates on myself, my activity on tumblr, projects I'm working on, or the blog itself.

Content Warnings

I don't post explicit content of any kind on Tumblr at all, however I may include suggestive material in some posts. I tag these accordingly and will sometimes use cuts on the posts, however I don't censor most things. I am very anti-censorship and pro-content warnings, don't question it. fiction does affect reality, I should know, however no one wants to hear my essay long opinions on the topic so don't bring it up, for ur own good.

Canon violence includes any violence or extreme emotional distress that happened in direct canon. Small things such as someone getting punched once don't really count, this tag is mainly for anything large that renders a warning.

Posts that are literally just me fawning over Hobie will be tagged with this, including self-shipping art and such. I know some people might not want to see that so I figured I'd throw a tag on there for anyone who'd rather skip it.

Anything not canon that features violence or emotional distress, headcanons, writing, and art may be included in this.

Posts mentioning or related to typical "cringe culture" topics. Includes fictkin, MOGAI micro-labels or xenogenders, neopronouns, etc. This tag is mostly a joke, cringe culture isn't dead but she did transition, she's catgender she/it/paw now. On a serious note, if you're not interested in those kinda things that's chill, you can avoid the tag.

[ryndicate]

꘏ General ꘏

About

This blog (mainly) creates and also interacts with dark content. I place warnings for all my content, so proceed at your own risk.

we are very very multifandom here. i hyperfixate a lot, and my adhd is sitting proudly at the wheel. whatever character my brain chooses for the day is usually how it goes. characters I write for are linked in my masterlist even if I haven't put anything out for them yet. I add as I go

I’ll be real and say that I frequently dip away from tumblr for a couple days rather often; I have a low social battery that drains even when I’m shitposting to no one in particular. But I love to chat so don’t hesitate to send an ask, I’ll get back to them next time I’m online :)

DNI’s 

My content is not suited nor intended for minors. 18 and up please and thank you. If you don’t have an age marked somewhere visible I will block. “18+” “adult” “legal” etc are not acceptable and will result in a block.

Blank blogs annoy the piss out of me but I'm too lazy to block them all so just have an age listed okay.

do not interact with my content (reblogs especially) if your own blog rules are not 18+. If i see 17+ or similiar, that makes me uncomfortable.

no dc anti’s (if you know how to scroll past, this doesn't include you) hate will be ignored. if you don’t like my content, the stuff i reblog, or the things i say, just block me or unfollow. 

if you ask for part 2s. it’s a rude thing to do in general. 

Rules and Asks

I typically answer all my asks, I don't ignore people so if I'm taking awhile to respond it's either because i havent seen it or I'm thinking on a response. However, if I think an ask is worded in a way that would make others or myself uncomfortable, check my return to sender tag. I'll probably have made a post with a response without directly posting the ask itself.

I do need a listed age to feel comfortable responding! Please no trauma dumping. And I'm awful at writing comfort so pls no "what would Chara do" h/c situation asks 🥲 I'm bad at them. Awful. The result of my attempt would somehow make your day worse. For your own mental health just pls do not lol.

I'm down with being called bb/babes,girl by just about anyone. But bitch/bestie/love are reserved for mutuals and discord friends, those are very important terms of endearment for me and it feels off getting them from people I don't know.

If you send me compliments about my writing we’re valentines. this isn’t even my own rule, this is cosmic law. 

Writing Info

I write every day, but I write and post at my own pace, the pace my irl life allows. If something is listed in my wips, I’m working on it so please don’t demand content from me.

The stuff I write is usually explicit, and even when it’s not has mature, dark, or unsettling natures to it. Not every fic will include these topics but beware they may contain incest, a/b/o, monsterfucking, horror, yandere etc. Here’s a little link to give you an idea on more, listing them can get tedious so i keep it separate and update it as I go.

I don’t do requests (commissions aside) but if you want to tell me your thoughts on a character, or maybe put them in a messy little situation, it might spark something in my mind and a little something might come of it, you never know ;3

what do i not write... hm. scat. vore. the Obvious. Other than that this is a really tough Q bc my mood switches up a lot. Sometimes I go on a single trope spree, other days I will write criminal level fluff in one hour and shiver inducing dark alley shit in the next. I have so much range, please expect me to use it.

[ohheyitsokay]

just a day

welcome to the poly frontier? 

listen absolutely no shade to the other authors who write triple frontier poly fics (I got permission) I just wanted to try my take on what relationships with this group of guys would look like - and I honestly think my execution is going to look really really different. This one’s just for me to explore and start to develop the dynamics, so I really hope you all enjoy!

note: I’m going to say this is an 18+ series, sorry!

pairing: triple frontier guys - Will “Ironhead” Miller, Santiago “Pope” Garcia, Francisco (Frankie) “Catfish” Morales, and Ben “Benny” Miller x (f) reader

wordcount: 2k?

warnings: obviously a poly relationship, which includes kissing, domestic intimacy with all of them (not just with the reader, but not in-between Will and Ben because nope), mild sexual themes

another note: I will not be fetishizing male/male relationships, nor will I be including any romance or sexual between the brothers

>>

You wake up tucked into Will’s chest, his beard tickling your hairline like he fell asleep kissing it. Hand on his chest, you feel the steady rise and fall of it, slow and peaceful in the murky morning light. His arm is around your shoulder, half tangled in your hair, and there’s another arm tucked around your waist from behind - Santi's.

Pressing a kiss to Will’s collarbone, you gently begin the process of extracting yourself, apologizing with soft squeezes instead of words. Their hands find each others in their sleep, and you almost think you made it, for once, before Will’s blue eyes find yours for just a moment. It happens every morning – they need to know you’re okay. 

Verifying the time, he gives a bleary smile before rolling, free arm searching for a pillow to hold against his body in your place during the precious few minutes he has before he needs to get up, too. 

Frankie is in the kitchen already, and of all of them, he’s the best at hearing your quiet footsteps. His arms wrap around your frame, gathering you into him as he relishes the feeling of just you and him, for a moment.

Your nails run over his back, and he shudders at the feeling, smiling at you a little as the two of you pull things out of the fridge. It’s unreasonable, how many groceries you all go through, but feeding them is important to you, a love language in itself. Frankie was the first awake – his coffee is already brewing. In half an hour, give or take, Will and Santi will wander out, and the smells in the kitchen will change, but not yet.

For now, it’s dark roast coffee and there are quiet crunches of the apple you tossed into his broad palm. It’s not enough for the whole day so you tuck a breakfast bar into his work bag for later, with and extra jacket and a water bottle. There’s no need for notes, with him, the slow kisses he shares with you at the door are more than enough to bring him home to you in the evening. Before he can give up his time with you his hand slips under the shirt you’re wearing, just running over your bare side like he has all the time in the world. 

Then his hat is firmly on his head, and he brushes his rough thumb over your cheek, looks at the stairs to the bedroom with just a touch of longing, and slides out the door.

You’re mixing peanut butter into a premade jar of overnight oats when Will wraps his arms around you from behind, pressing his warm chest against your back. He’s tired – more than the others, and you let him borrow your strength for long moments. Santi watched from the doorway, giving them too you, his eyes fiercely affectionate, before he sandwiches Will between you half crushing you with their weight.

Laughter is a good way to start the day, even if it breaks the quiet. 

They bump into each other, happy, but silently arguing over who’s turn it is, before Santi relents and slips off to the shower. When you hand Will the jar, he kisses your temple before your mouth, and his hand is firm on your hip. He makes you eat with him, would make you pancakes if he had time, and asks what you’re working on today. His fingers flip the pen in his hand, but he’s too distracted by you to work through the paper like he did before. It’s new, all of you sharing the same space, and there are pros and cons. 

Then they trade places and Santi's body is damp and insistent as he kisses you, a little too needy for a man who has less than twenty minutes before he has to leave. You cant really deny him, though, indulging his touching while exploring him in turn, before pushing his distractingly bare chest away from you. He talks about his day a lot, considering it hasn’t happened yet, but his passion is contagious. He isn’t planning on telling you, but he fixed a bug on your laptop last night before he went to bed, and hid your favorite chocolate in your desk.

The kitchen smells like juice and granola now, and the ache of waking up is seeping out of your limbs.

When Benny comes out, you expect him to complain about the noise, but he doesn’t, just ruffles his hair and hugs Santi sleepily from behind.

His energy hasn’t quite built for the day, but he cant really sleep in like he wants to, and likes to see them off. He was restless last night, you could tell even with Santi between you on the bed, and you wonder if he relaxed at all. You give them space, retreating to get yourself ready and set up in your home office, pausing to send Will off with kisses and well wishes. When he forgets his timing and kissed down your neck, you hook your fingers in to his belt loops and he almost calls in sick.

It doesn’t happen, though, he’s too responsible without extra encouragement, and his eyes crinkle as he promises to continue, later.

Then it’s Santi and Benny’s turn, looking silly with the former prepared for tedious meetings and the other in his pajama's with a duffle bag, but that’s how it goes, sometimes. 

When Benny finishes at the gym, he finds you working away, lost in your music, and hovers at the door for awhile before his eagerness for you wins out. His hands are needy, but he doesn’t say words – his eyebrows speak for him and you nearly give in to his big, pleading eyes. 

He likes it when you run your hands through his hair, and you do, and press a promise into his cheek with your lips. You know today isn’t a day he wants to plan fights or check emails or update his socials, but he gets to it anyway, waiting for you, and needed to feel productive. They’re all too smart, beautifully, wonderfully overpowered with strength and mind and love and you know they cant help but direct it somewhere, Benny included.

As you finish your work for the morning your phone tells you the others are meeting up for lunch, and you thank them individually for the chance to give Ben a little extra attention.

Last night’s fight hadn’t gone great. The four of you had rallied behind him afterwards, patching him up while Santi yelled about justice and Frankie forced him to eat and drink, but now was time for something different. You were the center of this world they’d created, the one who’s undivided attention meant everything to them. 

Ben rarely wanted to talk about the pain, during, needed to punch it out at the gym or be soothed by Santi's validation before seeking you for heated, slightly painful kisses. Now, though, he’s frustrated with himself, and seeing it hurts in your chest like the cut across his skin.

You settle onto the huge bed in his corner, offering him your arms and a smile that soothes the throbbing in his bruises. This is a moment just for the two of you, and he takes full advantage, tucking his head onto the pillow of your chest and letting your hands wander his shoulders and hair and neck. Ben starts out ranting, but gets distracted along the way, soaking in your attention and the sliver of skin exposed on your stomach.

He kisses along the line, unable to resist half smiling at you as he licks it, almost losing himself to the temptation to go a round with you all on his own. They wouldn’t mind, really, but he doesn’t, just shifts back up to press your mouth against his. It’s slower and it’s nice for him not to have to be intense, with you.

The afternoon is spent quietly, both of you working diligently, knowing the others are doing the same, so you can cherish your precious free evening. You find a note from Frankie, a little inside joke that he knows will remind you of a story, and it makes you text him something that will make him laugh. 

At some point Santi calls you, frustrated, needing to verbal process, and the three of you on speaker phone navigate it with the gusto of heroes on a fantastical adventure. Will’s logic is absent with him, but you get the feeling it hardly matters, this time around. In truth, Ben is better at working the tightness out of Santi’s voice, and when you talk, you can hear him sigh like you’ve scrubbed a bit of darkness out of his day. 

When he gets home his mood is much improved and he picks Benny up with a grunt, spinning him around once, thick arms careful of the younger man’s sore spots. You get an equally soft kiss, and you smack him when he squeezes your ass, a glint in his eye.

There’s still a bit of shyness in Ben as he asks Pope to look over the videos from the fight, still a bit of awe and raw respect for the older man, and it makes you melt a little to see. The men are tentative sometimes, about the developments in their relationships with each other, but some things needn’t change. 

The couch is nice, a recent purchase, and you have a matching chair you like to settle in, mostly ignoring the distant voices and glancing out the window through the leaves of a large tree in the front yard. There’s a story on your phone you’ve been meaning to catch up on, and it’s peaceful, reading as the clouds float by.

There’s sounds of tires rolling over the gravel, and it makes you laugh when you open the door to see Ironhead and Catfish carrying no less than a small crate of take-out from Benny’s favorite Italian place. Unpacking it, Will spends more time invading your space, catching up, and flirting with you than Frankie does. He would never say it aloud, but he’s excited to see the reaction to their surprise.

He gets a perfect one – Benny yells when he smells it, and is jumping up and down, and the way Frankie’s chest puffs tells you it was his idea. Will gives you a squeeze and you know he’s proud, too, if for different reasons. He takes the moment of distraction, while the attention is on his brother, to slip his hand in your back pocket and kiss you without anyone noticing. If he had his way, he would yank you into the laundry room, but the idea of eating together keeps your feet planted and he sighs against your mouth. 

The boys eat like they’re starved, before they’re grabbing at you, coaxing you into the living room, and you’re beyond thankful there’s not really dishes to do. It’s not that they would make you do them, but it’s nice for all of you to be able to ride out the remarkably low-effort evening. 

Santi is insistent it’s his turn – the others have all had their time with you today, and only Will grumbles. They compromise, your legs over the later,  your side in the protective hallow of the formers chest. You choose a movie at random, knowing they’ll talk through it if you do. It’s nice, to listen to them banter from the cozy arms wrapped around you.

They get caught up talking about an old friend you’ve never met, and Frankie tries to explain things to you as they rapid-fire stories and bets on where he is now. You roll your eyes when you lose track again and again, but it’s full of joy, and he catches it before getting pulled into a ridiculous debate. 

Hands run over your calves, gently kneading, and you wonder if Will even knows he’s doing it – taking care of you is his second nature.

The film is finished but the talking hasn’t, now moved on to the inaccuracies in the movie as they try to outdo each other with random useless knowledge. There’s no real annoyance in their voices as they bite at each other, and you think that really, nothing has changed, and it’s good.

At some point you doze off.

There’s hushed arguing, and Frankie wins, scooping you into his sturdy arms and carrying you to bed. He likes the way you murmur your thanks, and his heart pounds as you sleepily pull off his hat and toss it somewhere. It makes him feel like you knew it was him, could feel it was, even in your mostly unconscious state. It’s a nice feeling, and he tucks it away in his mind, hoping to save it for if ever he get’s jealous. 

The sleeping arrangements are a mess – Will has tried multiple times to make cohesive charts, and none of them stick. It’s a tangle of limbs and everyone shifts depending on temperature and general neediness. Santi laments the choice of a movie over a long evening of unhurried lovemaking, and receives and smack on the stomach in return. It makes you wake, halfway, and when your arms reach for him, he forgets his previous complaints.

They settle at their own pace, quiet conversations floating in and out of your dreams, and the sounds of teeth being brushed and plans being made make you smile. Tomorrow maybe, you’ll be up without a thought, awake and talking or kissing with whoever else didn’t need as much sleep, but for now, you didn’t mind. It was just day, with many before and many to come.

>>

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[wordsnstuff]

Guide to Drafting

Patreon || Ko-Fi || Masterlist || Work In Progress

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Planning v. Discovery

The first thing you must decide when you embark on the journey of drafting a story is how you’re going to get it done. Typically, there are two groups you can fit into, though most writers are somewhere in between. There are writers who plan meticulously before they begin writing to create a very clean first draft, or there are discovery writers (otherwise known as “pantsers”) who find more success in choosing a premise and then using a zero draft to explore the idea before gluing down any details. You are most likely someone who falls between those two methods. Some initial planning to feel familiar with your idea before you do some of the planning through the writing itself. Having some semblance of a method will help you narrow down your own process, which is immensely important if you want to get any substantial project near completion.

Consistency

Drafting is a difficult process because it’s either the revisitation of ideas you’ve already had, or the generations of ideas in quick succession. If you want to have a draft in a reasonable amount of time, you must develop a consistency in your writing. I won’t say that it must be a strict routine because time management can be a luxury, but you must make the consistent effort to write, and keep it in the forefront of your mind. Even if you don’t write every day, it should be something you try to make time for every day.

Know What You’re Trying to Accomplish

To get a draft done, you need to set expectations for yourself and they must be realistic. That doesn’t mean they have to be easy, or an amount of work you’ve been able to accomplish in the past. Considering how much time you dedicate to writing and your skillset, it should be a goal within reality. In addition, you must accept that you cannot create a masterpiece in one draft. For each version of your story that you write, you must have a focused goal, such as maintaining consistent characterization, making the plot concise and engaging, or making the prose more fluid and efficient. If you have a specific and attainable goal that you can accomplish in a reasonable amount of time with a fair amount of precision, each draft will be better than the last.  

Designate Work to Phases

As mentioned in the last section, it maximizes your time and effort to have specific and attainable goals for each draft. This doesn’t mean that you rewrite the draft each time (though that is very common amongst writers), but that you designate tasks to draft versions. I find it very helpful in clearing my mind and soothing my perfectionist anxiety to make a “schedule”, outlining what I’ll accomplish in each version following the zero draft. For example, my draft schedules usually end up something like this:

Zero Draft: Main plot line, basic characterization, key world building

First Draft: Finalize Timeline, research for world building, structure

Second Draft: (Rewrite) Plot Development Fine Tuning

Subplot development

Foreshadowing

Build up to climaxes

Tone & Pace

Third Draft: (Intermittent Rewrites) Character Development Fine Tuning

Backstory

Subtextual Development

Making sure motivations are clear

Relationships between characters

Reinforcing character arcs

Checking dialogue

Fourth Draft: (Give to Beta Readers) World Building & Prose

Descriptions & Flow

Finalize settings

Checking grammar & punctuation

Reader Immersion

Fifth Draft: Incorporate Beta Reader Feedback

Write for Yourself First

In what some call the “zero-draft”, there are no rules. This draft is purely for your eyes. It’s you telling yourself the story for the first time. So, you don’t have to write in chronological order, or know the right word you’re looking for, or take a break every time you run into a problem. The purpose of the zero draft is to get a rough idea of as much of the story as you can and avoid getting snagged on minor details. This part is important. A lot of writers like to outline meticulously before they begin drafting and if that works for you, that’s great, but the majority of writers who attempt that get stuck in the planning phase, or burnt out on their story before a word of it exists. The easiest way to avoid those two situations is to do a zero draft, which can be as long or short as you want if it provides a skeleton for you to add meat to later.

Common Struggles

~ How do you estimate the number of words/chapters?... That depends on the genre, mostly. However, that’s usually something you decide in the second draft and beyond, and it can vary because of factors you haven’t got locked down until the plot and character arcs are firm or final. This is also something you’ll probably do a lot of tinkering with, and receive feedback on, especially from beta-readers, who can advise you on where natural breaks could occur from their perspective.

~ Why, after planning everything out, do I always struggle to write the draft?... 99% of the time, it’s because you’ve either burned yourself out, or accumulated too much pressure. When you put that much effort and time into a story, you can either slip into a headspace where you feel little excitement about it because you’ve already done all of the problem solving and had all of the revelations. It’s usually beneficial at this stage to take a step back (even if you’re not burnt out) and give your story some space, so that once you come back to it, you’re enthusiastic enough to fully realize your vision. If instead you’re struggling to write because you feel a lot of pressure to do justice for a story you’ve put so much love into already, take a step back, remember that the first draft is just for you, and work on letting go of the idea that the zero draft is meant to serve any purpose beside simply existing. 

~ How do I come up with the necessary scenes to move the story forward between major plot points?... Most writing problems can be solved by asking yourself the right questions. When you’re trying to figure out what your reader needs to see next in order to effectively set up the next major event, ask yourself “What would happen between event A and event B that would add context or make event B more impactful?”. Treat it like a real situation and try to map out all of the tiny, notable moments that would take place between the major plot points, and then assess those moments on the basis of how impactful they would be to the coming scenes, and whether they can add context, set the tone, or aide in the rising action.

~ How do I balance sticking to the draft and following my own creative instinct in the moment?... This is a judgement call. Sometimes you’ll realize that maybe you should have just stuck to the outline, but remember that you can always go back, rewrite, test things out, etc. Always save every version of every scene, just in case, and go wild. Don’t be afraid to take detours just to explore. The writing process is anything but linear. 

~ How do I maintain momentum in my writing progress when I constantly have distractions or other responsibilities that take priority?... Work at it. There’s no magic trick or piece of advice I could say that gets rid of your personal responsibilities. Write when you can, don’t make excuses on top of the reasons you have no control over, and remember that you create your own deadlines and expectations. Be kind to yourself, do what you can, and don’t spend potential writing time punishing yourself because there isn’t as much as you’d like. 

~ How should I designate space (words/pages) to specific scenes/description/conversations, etc?... Trust your instinct and remember you can always cut/add later. In the earlier drafts, I’d advise you try to create as much material as possible to work with, and in the later drafts, be ruthless when determining what is necessary and adds value, and what doesn’t.

~ How do I finish a draft if I regularly lose motivation or interest in my projects?... Accept the fact that motivation is fickle, and that no writer in history has ever maintained “inspiration” for any project from the beginning to the end. There are going to be days where you’re like “ugh this is not what I want to do right now”, probably more than there are days where you’re stoked to work on your project, but that’s reality. If your goal is to finish a draft, you must recognize that writing is work, and nobody wants to work all the time. Try to supplement the lack of motivation by setting a positive and enjoyable routine so that, even when you’re not particularly motivated, you still know that your writing time will be peaceful and comfortable. 

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[the-witty-pen-name]

Deadbeat Pt. 3

Lee Bodecker x F!Reader

18+ ONLY 

Warnings: age gap (reader is 21), smut, cursing, abandonment, infatuation, cheating/divorce, angst, mild housewife kink, mentions of prostitution, mentions of alcohol, corrupt official 

Word Count: 4.7k

Summary: You work at the bar at the edge of town, the Sheriff is going through a divorce and needs to rent a room.

A/N: I’m terrible at writing summaries and I’m so sorry about that! I don’t think I would consider this a dark!fic, but it does cover a lot of themes, and topics that are darker than I usually write about- but I think that comes with the territory of writing about Lee Bodecker. I’ll make sure to update the warnings for each chapter and do not read if you are underage. I also ignored canon for this one.

This is unedited, and I missed anything I should include as a warning let me know! This chapter introduces some new plots and conflicts, so it jumps around a little more than the previous ones. 

I hope you all enjoy!

I also am having some writer’s block with my Obi-Wan Kenobi miniseries I was working on, so expect Part 3 sometime Sunday hopefully! So sorry for the delay on the final chapter. 

Tags and Requests are OPEN 

Part One // Part Two 

Henry Curtis was one of the most infuriating people Lee had ever met. Curtis was a writer for the Columbus newspaper and constantly pestering the Sheriff. Curtis seemed to have a sixth sense for whenever the Sheriff did anything. He was desperately trying to catch the Sheriff doing anything but so far had remained unsuccessful. Curtis was the biggest obstacle Lee faced in winning re-election. The man would show up out of nowhere, pen and pad in hand ready to find anything that would be enough to keep the Sheriff out of office.

Maybe Curtis was just doing his job, but Lee always felt like it was much more personal. It was probably just his own resentment of the man who was just doing his job. But the man didn’t have to be so goddamn invasive. When the Sheriff had devised his plan on offering to rent a room from you, he was so tied up in his own mess of divorce and his somewhat confusing feelings towards you he had completely forgotten about the press. They would have a field day with the divorce alone, but now on top of everything else, Lee knew he should be more careful.

Lee always had to be careful, especially if he was meeting Leroy Brown. Lee would make sure he drove way out of town, and always insisted they met at a different location every time. This would infuriate Brown but Lee was the only lawman he had working for him. Sometimes Lee would drive several hours out of the way, always at some deserted ghost town or some sad excuse for a diner or a bar. Always somewhere no one would recognize him.

Lee lied to you and told you he and a few of the deputies would need to drive out of town for a stakeout when he needed to meet with Brown. It was one of those nights, sitting in the cruiser with the headlights off, as he parked in an abandoned parking lot almost two hours out of town.

He had been able to put this off for a couple weeks, lying about other legitimate jobs getting in the way. Honestly, it was because he wanted to one, avoid anything that would cause suspicion from Henry Curtis hearing he was back in town and two, he was selfishly allowing himself to just spend his nights at his new home, spending all the time he could manage with you. It was like being in that little white house was a place where he could let himself be delusional, and time spent with you was what his life actually was, not this mess he was currently dealing with. He wanted out.

Lee knew he wasn’t a good man. He knew that his laundry list of offenses had tarnished his badge a long time ago. He knew what he was doing, and before he never cared. Now, he’s thinking about how his actions could affect you. You were innocent, unaware of everything he was stuck in. He knew you weren’t stupid, and he was sure the town knows some about his corruption. But now, he couldn’t rationalize away his actions for any reason when it came to you. Janie? She didn’t care and would encourage it. She’d be in on it too. She’d have no problem lying to ladies at Church or starting other rumors to keep the town talking about anyone but Lee. She was as power hungry as he was sometimes, which could be a testament as to how their loveless marriage held together for so long.

***

“Hi, I’m looking for a Ms. (Y/L/N)?” the man asked when he approached you, talking a seat at one of the barstools.

“Who’s asking for her?” you asked raising an eyebrow.

“I’m Henry Curtis, I work for the Columbus Dispatch.”

“The newspaper?”

“That’s the one.”

“Why are you looking for her?”

“I’m doing a story on her mother’s marriage to Harvey Tucker.”

“She’s not here tonight. But I can let her know you were here. Do you got a card?”

The man pulled out a business card from his wallet and slide it across the bar. You picked it up and read all the information before putting it in the pocket of your apron.

“Seems weird for the Columbus paper to want to do a story on that a month and a half after it happened,” you said skeptically.

“We did cover the story when it happened,” Curtis informed you. “Doing a follow up since the story broke about his wife missing.”

“Missing?” you ask. “Do they know what happened?”

“Robbed the bastard blind and then ran apparently,” Curtis said casually looking past you at the chalkboard on the wall. “Scotch, neat.”

“Yes, sir,” you reply, grabbing the bottle from the shelf. “Has anything else been found out yet?”

“Not yet, that’s why I’m here. Checking in to see if she’d come back here because I heard Ms. (Y/L/N) still lives around these parts.” He then pulled a newspaper out of the inside pocket of his coat and started flipping through the pages.

“She has another kid too, right?” you asked, playing dumb. “A boy, I think. Do you know where he is?”

“Couldn’t say,” he sounded very indifferent, “Most likely went with her but who knows? I went to the Sheriff’s office to see if they knew anything but the Sheriff wasn’t there.”

“That’s too bad,” you say. “I’m sure Sheriff Bodecker would help you help if he can.”

Your statement made Mr. Curtis chuckle, but you didn’t follow up on it. You were just focusing on getting as much information about your mother and brother as you could.

“Speaking of Mr. Bodecker,” he began, “I recently saw his wife is getting remarried. Saw the announcement of the engagement in the paper.”

“Yeah, that’s right,” you respond, skeptically. You didn’t know why but you didn’t trust this man. It was something in the tone of his voice, or maybe it was just how he held himself. Very polished, a suit and a nice dress jacket. He looked very out of place in this town, and this little bar.

“You familiar with the Sheriff at all, miss?”

“Not too well,” you shrug, “Haven’t had any run-ins with the law myself.”

“Not even a speeding ticket?” He asks, only a little condescendingly.

“Can’t get a speeding ticket if you don’t have a car,” you point out.

“Touché,” he chuckles before taking a sip of his drink.

He doesn’t ask you anymore questions, and when he leaves, he gives you a five-dollar tip.

***

Lee receives his cut from Brown. There was nothing new to report on that front and his meeting went by smoothly. All Lee had to do was to turn a blind eye, and make sure the rest of the department stays unaware of the brothel’s existence. Brown always insisted on meeting with him, wanting to know what the Sheriff’s department was investigating and making sure his businesses stayed under the radar. He felt sick, and is preoccupied with the fact he has an envelope of dirty money in the cruiser’s glovebox.

It’s around midnight when he pulls up to the house. He expects that you’re already asleep, but he notices the lamp is on in the living room. He takes the money out of his glovebox and tucks it away into the inner pocket of his jacket. Coming inside, he finds you on the couch, knees pulled to your chest, staring at the business card Mr. Curtis had given you. You face is stained with dried up tears, and you still haven’t even changed out of your work clothes.

“What’s that?” he asks, the sight of you breaking his heart. He winces because he comes off a lot harsher than he meant.

“Some reporter came while I was at work wanting to talk to me,” you explain softly, you sound exhausted. “Wanted to talk to me cause he’s doing a story on my mother. Apparently, she’s on the run from the Columbus police.”

You extend your hand to give Lee the card. He feels his jaw clench when he reads the information. “What happened?” he asks, taking a deep breath and sitting down next to you.

“I pretended I wasn’t me,” you say, another tear rolling down your cheek. “He came in asking for me so I said I’d pass his card on. I didn’t want to tell him who I was because he didn’t explain why he was looking for me at first. I don’t know- just scared me. I’m more upset about the news itself than him.”

“You did the right thing,” Lee said softly, placing a hand on your shoulder comfortingly. He was angry, but he didn’t show it. It worried him, fucking Curtis snooping around this close to you. It made him feel protective, wanting to shield you from the whole ordeal. He had been on the receiving end of unsolicited attention from the press and he knew how ruthless they were. He knew this wouldn’t be the only time Curtis would try to get in touch with you. He’d find out where you lived, he’d continue to show up while you were working- the whole nine yards. He didn’t want you going through that.

Curtis talking to you also made him incredibly paranoid. It was his two worlds that he desperately wanted to keep apart were colliding. He knew it was impossible, but he so wanted to keep you separated from the other part of his life. It wasn’t who he wanted you to see. Hell, he hasn’t even been here for a month. It wasn’t that he wanted to keep you in the dark, at least that wasn’t entirely intentional. Actually, he wasn’t sure, maybe it was intentional. However, it wasn’t just you he wanted to hide aspects of his life from. He wanted his involvement with Brown and others hidden from every goddamn registered voter. You were no different, he tried to rationalize. But that wasn’t true. These feelings he harbored for you, were getting worse. He needed to unwrap himself from this situation, and for the sake of you finding out he was a shill, keep you away from that asshole. He didn’t want to let himself think about how the way you look at him would change.

And here he was, making the situation all about him. It was in his nature.

“He’s just going to show up again if I don’t call him,” you say, wiping your eyes. “Maybe I should just call him in the morning. Just be honest and say I don’t know anything. He can keep coming around but nothing is going to change.”

“I can take care of it,” he says. He couldn’t risk you talking to Curtis again. For all he knows, Curtis would tell you all about the story on the Sheriff he’d been trying to confirm for years. Lee knew he couldn’t let that happen. He fully intends on telling you, but how the hell do you bring that up? ‘Hey doll, I’m also on the payroll of every pimp and bootlegger in a ten-mile radius, just letting you know.’ It wasn’t going to come up, unless Curtis tells you about it. He’d be hoping to pull himself out if it, show you how you made him want to be better.

For now, he settles for comforting you, and just being there to take care of you. Make you feel better. He wraps an arm around your shoulder and lets you cry into his chest. He sighs, kissing the top of your head in a friendly way and you curl up against him. Under different circumstances, you probably wouldn’t have let yourself do this- show your vulnerability or allow anyone to comfort you like this. But it was all the events of the past month, your mother leaving, everything, just all hitting you at once, and you were happy you weren’t alone.

In the morning, you wake up on the couch with a blanket over you. You see Lee asleep in the chair, and you realize he stayed with you all night. It makes your heart flutter. You pull the blanket up over your chin and close your eyes again. You felt surprisingly well rested. The stress and worry were pushed to the back of your mind long enough to let you get some sleep. It still lingered in the back of your mind, but you reminded yourself that for now, there was nothing you could do. You had the day off, and you let yourself have a little longer time to sleep in.

You woke up to the smell of coffee brewing and the sound of sizzling on the stove. When you opened your eyes, Lee was no longer in the chair. You sat up and looked toward the kitchen, where you saw Lee with his back to you while he worked with the pans on top of the stove. The portable radio was positioned on the counter, and it was playing at a low volume, so it wouldn’t wake you up.

“Hey,” you say softly, still waking up as you walk into the kitchen.

“Morning, doll,” he says, glancing back at you for a moment. “How’re you feeling?”

“A little better,” you admit, grabbing a mug for yourself out of the cabinet. You pour yourself a cup of coffee, savoring the smell before making it how you usually take it. “Thank you for sitting with me,” you say honestly, “you didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to,” he says with a small grin. “I just wanted to help.”

“I really appreciate it, Lee,” you reiterate your thanks, hopping up to take a seat on the counter, watching him cook breakfast. “Didn’t know you knew how to cook,” you joke, making him chuckle.

“I’m full of surprises, sweetheart,” he smirks, making you feel flushed. You take another drawn out sip of your coffee to try to distract yourself. You watch his arms, and his hands as they maneuver and flex when he cooks. You imagine how they must feel, your eyes focused on the veins. You bit your lip and it reminds you of the dream you had a little while back when he first moved in. You imagine him stepping in between your legs as your propped up on the counter, his hands gently gripping your thighs and-

“I’ll get it,” you announce hurriedly as you hear someone knock on the front door. You hop off the counter careful to not spill your coffee, and head to answer the door. Lee watches you bounce out of the room, fixing your hair as you go and you don’t catch his smile.

“Arvin,” you say surprised, stepping out onto the porch. “What are you doing here?” you ask, with a small grin. You’re confused but nonetheless happy to see him.

“You look like you’ve been crying,” he observes, concern written all over his face.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” you say dismissively, “Just last night I was thinking about my ma and everything. Just had trouble sleeping is all.”

“The Sheriff didn’t do anything?” Arvin asked in a hushed tone, looking over your shoulder to see if Lee could hear you two.

“No, nothing, he’s been perfectly fine,” you say coming to the Sheriff’s defense. “I know you and Ms. Russell are worried, I know how it must look- but Arvin I swear he’s just my tenant. He’s been nothing but a gentleman.”

“Just making sure,” he says, letting it go for now. “Lenora asked me to bring these by for you.” He hands you the glass baking dish that you can see is filled with homemade cinnamon rolls. “She’s been practicing making all kinds of baked goods for when the Church does that bake sale and has me running all over town giving it away cause me and Uncle Earskell can’t keep up with it all.”

“Tell her thank you for me,” you say with a smile, “And I’ll bring the dish with me to Church tomorrow- give it back to her.”

“She misses you I think,” Arvin says sheepishly, pushing his hands into his front pockets. “I mean- I do- I think my whole family does- we all do. I’m sorry my grandmother hasn’t asked you over in a while…”

“I understand,” you nod. “Reputation is an important thing.”

“I just didn’t want you to think it was because of us,” he says looking down at the porch, his eyes fixed on a loose board. “You know how she is- everything no matter the context is somehow a sin. Scared to death of her own shadow…”

“I know you’re not that resentful, Arvin Russell,” you chuckle and he relaxes. “And I don’t hold any hard feelings towards anyone in your family- you all have always been good to me.”

“Well, um,” he says awkwardly, looking like he was holding back from saying more. “I got to hit a couple more houses before I head to work, so I guess I’ll see you tomorrow at Church?”

“I’ll be there.”

“Oh- I wanted to let you know,” he says, turning around as he’s already heading down the front steps, “The principal down at the high school is looking for secretaries- Lenora heard and thought you might be interested. It pays like $35 a week, I think. You should call Linda Carson; I think Lenora said- that’s the woman who’s in charge of hiring people, I think.”

“I’ll call the school first thing Monday morning,” you say, grin stretching from ear to ear. Arvin nods and says goodbye again. You walk back into the house like you’re on top of the world. You couldn’t contain your excitement. That job if you could get it would be a dream. You’d be making so much more than you’re already making. You were so excited.

“You’re in a much better mood than when I last saw you,” Lee jokes. He’s sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper while he eats his breakfast. You notice that he made you a table setting- brought your coffee over and everything. You place the baking dish in the middle of the table and sit down.

“That was Arvin,” you say happily, and Lee feels his heart sink into his stomach.

“Oh yeah?” he asks, trying to not let on how his heart feels like it’s crushed. He knew it was only a matter of time before a boy would come around- whether it be Arvin or someone else your own age.

“Well, first he was just dropping off baked goods Lenora made,” you say gesturing to the dish on the table. “He’s going around to everybody, I guess. He mentioned the high school is looking for office secretaries- Lenora wanted me to know. Thirty-five dollars a week! I’m going to talk to Linda Carson about it Monday morning. Can you imagine? I could get a secretary job.”

Lee feels just a crash of relief wash over him. He’s so happy that you are looking at a new job. You deserve better than that bar. He knew you deserved the job just as much as any of the other candidates. You work harder than anyone he knows.

“That’s fantastic, sugar,” he replies. “You deserve it.”

“Do you think I have a chance?” you ask, feeling a little self-conscious- you knew you weren’t as experienced as other candidates would be for sure.

“Of course, I do,” he says, putting down the paper to give you his full attention. “I feel like you getting this job is a definite. There’s no doubt about it.”

“You’re just buttering me up,” you scoff, finishing up your food, making him chuckle. You may have also seen his cheeks redden, but you couldn’t say for sure. You finish off your coffee, and then bring you dishes back to the kitchen, leaving them in the sink. Lee turns his attention back to his newspaper and you head upstairs to get ready for your day.

When you head upstairs, Lee notices that you took the radio with you- and he could hear you were listening to music from upstairs. He decides before it’s too late to ring Mark Cunningham. The line rings a couple of times before Mark answers.

“Cunningham.”

“Morning, Mark. It’s Sheriff Bodecker,” he smirks.

“What can I do for you Sheriff?” he asks, the sound of shuffling paper comes through as well. Most likely flipping through the paper.

“I wanna call in that favor you owe me,” he says, casually pacing the living room, holding the receiver up to his ear and the base of the rotary phone in the other.

“Of course, Sheriff,” he says. A while back, Bodecker busted the principal making moonshine in his old barn that was at the end of his property. Lee looked the other way and was waiting for the right thing to call in a favor for.

“I want you to hire (Y/N) (Y/L/N) for the secretary job,” he says, looking to the stairs, making sure you aren’t coming. The music is still playing loudly from upstairs so he determines he’s still got time.

“That’s all?” Mark asked surprised.

“That’s all I want from you,” Lee replies. “I expect you can make that happen?”

“Without a doubt. When can she start?”

“Still have her come in for an interview. I don’t anyone else knowing I called you about this- including her.”

“Done.”

With that, Lee hangs up the phone, feeling really good about this decision. He knew how much that job meant to you- he could see it in your eyes and how excitedly you talked about it. He can’t wait to see you when you find out you get the position. He knows it’s going to make you so happy. He knows you’d be a fantastic candidate, but this just eliminates any doubt. He reasons that there isn’t much difference, since you were very likely to get it anyways. He just had to make sure.

He can picture you know, coming home from the interview- excited to tell him that you got the job. You’d be so excited you’d jump up and hug him tightly, just so overjoyed that you let your feelings take over. You’d wrap your legs and around his waist and he’d hold you up by holding the back of your thighs. You’d wrap your arms tightly around him and bury your head in the crook of his neck. You’d lift your head up to look at him, embarrassed at your actions and then he’d press his lips to yours. You’d gasp softly, but your lips would melt against his own and your arms would wrap tightly around his neck. He’d walk forward, pressing you up against the wall and he’d kiss your neck mumbling praises of congratulations against your skin as his name falls from your lips at how good he’d make you feel. It’s almost unbearable how bad he wants you.

He heads to him room to get ready for his day, but his mind is still clouded with thoughts of you. He thinks about how much he wants nothing more that to just pin you on his mattress. He wonders if you know how crazy you make him. Sometimes there’s something in your eye that makes him think you want him too, but he’s not sure. His better judgement holds him back from everything he wants to do. He thinks about how it must feel to have his head right in-between your thighs. Back in the kitchen together, he wanted to just get on his knees and worship you. The feeling of them pressing against him as he sucks on your clit and runs his tongue across your folds.

Serval hours later, he can’t shake the thoughts, even sitting in his office at the sheriff’s station- working on a Saturday yet again. He’s cooped up in his office, unable to get through any of the paperwork that has piled up on his desk. He’s thinking about you, again, but in this daydream, you’re bent over his desk- because you came by to see him on your break from work at the school. His office door locked and his blinds pulled so he can bend you over and take you right there- rough and fast, sending you back to work with a feeling of him still there between your legs well after you’re back at your own desk, still sore from the encounter.

“You got a visitor, Lee,” the intercom on his desk lights up.

“Send ‘em in,” he responds back, shaking his head to snap out of it. He needed to get a grip.

“Sorry I didn’t call,” you say, walking into his office. His eyes widen and he wonders if he’s still day dreaming. He discreetly pinches himself. You’re actually here, standing in his office, while he looks at you dumbfounded. Part of him would think he manifested it if he was a man of any faith. “You forgot this,” you say, putting his wallet on the desk. “You must have taken it out of your back pocket before falling asleep in the chair last night. It was laying on the coffee table. I figured I’d stop by with it while I was coming up this way anyways.”  

“You’re a doll,” he grins, putting his wallet in his back pocket. “What are you doing?”

“I took the bus to the library to return some books, and now I’m going shopping for something to wear when I go in for an interview since I have the day off to go,” you explain. “I’m also probably going to get lunch after that before heading back home. I just didn’t want to be home in case that reporter stopped by. I’m not ready to talk to him yet.”

“I can take care of it,” he says, “He’ll make his way over here soon enough. I can talk to him.”

“You would do that for me?” you ask, the relief evident across your whole face.

“Yeah, I can talk to him, let him know you gave a statement here,” he says. You nod. “You know as much as he does, so it doesn’t matter if I tell him you don’t know shit or if you tell him.”

“You’re a lifesaver,” you sigh, so relieved thinking that you won’t have to hear from Henry Curtis again. “If he tells you anything about them… will you let me know?”

“Of course, sweetheart.”

“Thank you,” you say, hurriedly walking over behind him and quickly hugging his shoulders. You then are back by the door again before he can register the gesture. “Are you going to be home tonight?” you ask, your hand on the doorknob.

“Not until late,” he says reluctantly, and he can see the disappointment on your face- unless his mind was playing tricks on him.

“Okay,” you say finally, “Um, I’ll see you later then.”

“Bye, doll,” he says when you walk out of his office.

Are you going to be home tonight? Your voice lingers in his head. It was such a harmless phrase that could’ve just been one of curiosity. Maybe you were just asking because you were thinking about what you were doing for dinner. It most likely just meant nothing. But, the look on your face when he said no makes him think otherwise. Did it mean you cared? That you wanted to spend time with him? You wanted to see him and be with him as desperately as he needed you perhaps? Just the phrasing itself makes his brain feel like putty. It’s like you’re waiting up for him. It’s like you share the house in a way that’s much more than just him renting a room from you. It’s like you’re his and he’s yours. It’s like saying our house… our home. The question was so intimate and implied so much more about how you saw him and what he was to you. He knew seeing him as how he saw you was next to impossible, but you saw him as more than the Sheriff and more than just the jerk living in your house.

Part Four

 Taglist:

@scar-is-bi @jiminlife2k18 @asylummaniac01​ @rosalynshields​ @charmed-asylum @jamesbuchananbuckybarnes1917 @alexandrathegreat3

[peralta-guaranteed]

(inspired by this ask the lovely @fourdrinkamy got!)

“Oh!” The Sergeant smiles widely at her phone before looking up, surveying the little group that’s gathered around her. “Do you guys mind if my husband joins us for a minute? He’s just gotten off his shift.”

There’s the typical rushed murmur of agreement and “of course not!” before Amy begins writing something on her phone.

“Who’s her husband?” One of the rookies asks in a hushed tone at the other end of the bar where the new team members had sort of congregated - they’d been a bit too timid to sit closer with the rest of the uniformed officers that Amy had invited out for drinks at Shaw’s after a particularly tough week for them.

“Detective Peralta from the first floor.” One of the less rookie-ish rookies (god they really need a better labeling system for that) answers, much to the first askers surprise.

“The... uh... the goofball?”

Gary a few seats beside them grins. That was probably the nicest descriptor the poor woman could’ve thought of when being reminded of the chaos-made-human that sometimes descended from the first floor unto theirs, bringing with him stories of crazy heists or trying to rope some of them into his convoluted plans during bigger meetings of the precinct.

“Yeah. He’s a bit odd.” Rookie Level 5 (hm, maybe that’s not a good labeling plan either) nods. “Sometimes I wonder what the Sarge sees in him, but she married him, so...” He shrugs.

“Hard to imagine someone as professional and high-strung as Sergeant Santiago going for that kind of crazy.”

“Well, you never know.” Rookie Level 5 (now marked down as bit of a creep he should keep an eye on after that wink and laugh, Gary thinks) answers.

And they really don’t know, he thinks. He doesn’t fault them for that - it took quite a while for him to figure it out too, only presented with the Santiago-Peralta team in ‘professional’ settings that Jake always tried to make as unprofessional as possible while Amy next to him huffed and tried to keep them both in the lane.

They’ll probably understand faster than him, though, given the current setting. The soft shock on all their faces when the sergeant turned up for this casual get-together in a flowery, dark-coloured dress instead of the well-pressed suit they all expected from her even out of uniform had already unsettled their pre-conceived imagie of her a little bit.

Gary’s musings are quickly interrupted by a very loud, very boisterous voice.

“Eyoh! Look at New York’s Finest drinking some of New York’s worst!”

Amy rolls her eyes at him with a fond smile while Jake makes his way through the group, greeting most of them with another joke that only half of them understand, but most laugh at out of politeness, until he settles down next to her. There’s a moment of hesitation in his movements before he leans over to kiss her cheek, as if he’s afraid she might actually pull away in this setting - he’s definitely not afraid to kiss her hello when he visits her at her desk downstairs, but it’s a different feeling to this, all eyes of her squad on them, so he quickly leans back again to grin at them all and make another quip about drink recommendations in this place if they really want to get to know each other, winkwink.

Rookie Level 1 (yeah, it really doesn’t work) scoffs and shoots Rookie Level 5 (damn, it’s kind of stuck though) a look that he repeats with a nod. Peralta is really making sure to cement their image of him for the next few minutes - immediately pulling the situation to him as the class clown that he is, entertaining the closer row of officers near him with some new story from upstairs that only half sounds over-exaggerated. He’s all swinging arms and loud noises and wide grins, and Gary wonders if any of the others are able to make out the little details that belie his persona or if he’s just too aware of them now himself.

The way he’ll turn towards Amy at the end of every story with his grin, as if waiting for her reaction first and foremost, and only continuing when he sees her smile even as she shakes her head. The fact that he remembered all of their names in his comical greetings, and even tries to pull in the rookie group at the end of the bar into the conversation. The slightest hint of a serious face inbetween his rambling, his eyes doing a quick once-over of the whole bar and their group as if to make sure everyone’s still okay - a detective skill he clearly can never turn off.

It’s not much - it’d give away the game if it was any more obvious - but it’s enough for Gary to remember that underneath all the bravado and jokester behaviour, he’s still Sergeant Amy Santiago’s husband, and for a reason.

-*-

That reason shows itself about twenty minutes later, when his first beer is finished and the conversations of the group have broken back into their own areas, talking about their week or about upcoming assignments, sharing academy anecdotes or first-arrest-stories. Gary is sure detective Peralta would happily jump into these talks as well if he only heard them, but there’s no way he’s listening to anything but Amy next to him, a tad too noisy after her second beer as she tells him about something that happened at work today.

Gary tries his best to catch Rookie Level 1′s attention, and diverts it towards the pair with an eyebrow raise and a soft side-nod of the head.

“Oh.” Level 1 (her name is Lisa, he thinks? He needs to check the rooster.) says, quietly, and he nods again. She sees. (She’s a quick one, he really needs an eye on her for future assignments.)

And what she sees is proof enough of what the Sarge sees in her goofball husband, too.

They’ve seem to have gone into their own little bubble after the main attention drifted away from them, talking in hushed tones about their son and how someone had just texted them an update on the babysitting evening. And within that bubble, it almost seems like someone had cut the strings of the muppet-like actions of the Peralta they all know.

His whole body language seems to shift - his shoulders are hanging low as he leans closer and closer to Amy next to him, his face in his hand as he hooks his arm over the backrest behind her, his eyes stuck on her and whatever story she’s telling him about right now. There’s the softest smile on his face, and a shine to his eyes as she animatedly - almost as animated as he usually is - talks between hiccups from the beer she’s drinking a little bit too fast.

The air has gone out of him, but not in a bad way - he’s far more settled than usual, like someone dialed down his usual speed. He still grins and nods and raises his eyebrows high in reactions to what Amy is saying, but he also absent-mindedly reaches over and tucks a stray piece of her hair behind her ear, his hand trailing down her neck for a second after it. Gary’s sure that as it drops down underneath the table, it definitely reaches for hers to hold.

“Yeah”, Lisa (it’s definitely Lisa, he remembers her introducing herself to him a few weeks ago more clearly now) nods towards him, quietly and with a smile. “Yeah, I get it.” as Peralta leans even closer to Amy, whispers something soft into her ear that makes her giggle, and giggle a little more when he presses a little kiss right beside her ear.

He stands up, out of the bubble, and withing seconds the persona is back as he grins at them all.

“Welp, I better take my wife home before I have to carry her home.” He extolls, before - of course - looking down again with a smile. “Just joking, babe, I know you can hold your own when it comes to New York’s Worst at Shaw’s.”

The Sergeant rolls her eyes again, but she also takes his offered arm as she stands up, tells them all to have a good rest of the night and enjoy their weekend off properly, and they could catch the slightest of winks into Jake’s direction from her if they only looked close enough.

He loops an arm around her waist as he says his goodbyes as well, and uses it to both support her and steer her as they leave, Amy clearly a bit less sure on her feet than she usually is. He wraps her scarf around her neck at the clothesrack at the front of the bar, tugs her jacket down after she’s slipped into it with waving arms and buttons the last few buttons for her that her fingers fumble at, and Lisa smiles at Gary as Amy stumbles for the door and is immediately held at bay again by her husband’s soft grip on her arm.

“Yeah, I can see it.” She says, and Gary nods.

[shivada-jade]

Timing

characters: albedo, sucrose, (more soon)

warning(s): n/a

Albedo's feet trudges against the snow of Dragonspine. The sun that shines is nothing more than just light. Warmth is rare on the mountain. It has been years since you disappeared. The elemental traces on your vision are long gone.

Two years.

That's how long you've been working as an apprentice under Albedo's name. You were but another knight under the investigation team that Albedo took interest in. Your curiosity about the time space continuum places a smile on his face. You were determined to find the answers of the world. You were someone as eager as Sucrose and himself, so he invited you to explore with them.

You made countless of jokes with him and Sucrose, leaving a light in their hearts and brightness on their faces when you walk in their labs. Though sometimes, Albedo never understood, or Sucrose was too dense to realize it was a joke, but all it took was your laughter to make them chuckle.

Two years.

That's how long you've been gone. You left without a trace.

Your disappearance left them a heavy heart and less interest to continue their research. Even your vision had died out. It's glow never came back. Your belongings are held on to the two with the desire to see you again.

A puff of white smoke escapes Albedo's lips when he reaches his research table in Dragonspine. Sucrose follows after with timid steps. She places her coat onto her own designated spot in the lab.

The lab itself is a warm cave near by the heart of Dragonspine. The bio alchemist Sucrose slowly tidies up her area before working. Papers that pile on her small desk reserved for her went into the fire. She did not want to be in the cold, but to see memories of you again is what leads her back.

"Sucrose."

The girl jumps and averts her eyes, "Yes, Mister Albedo?

"The observations on our recent research resonates with our other projects; that which..."

His words turn to a blur as Sucrose's honey eyes reach behind Albedo's back and on the walls. Her attention diverts from the conversation to what was scratched on the wall. Albedo notices where her eyes wander and follow the direction she looks at.

He turns his heels to the wall they stare at. Sucrose makes the first step closer to the mysterious writing for it is not hers or Albedo's. Tears well her eyes as she covers her mouth letting out a soft gasp.

The blonde trails behind, gradually reaching the writing. Albedo's fingers run over the scratches on the cave's wall. His keen eyes re-read what is written while he shakes his head in disbelief.

In your penmanship wrote, "So... Albedo and Sucrose. Remember that time machine I tried to make when we discovered how visions react to certain aspects of different gadgets? You know... as a joke? Holy crap, it actually worked."

Sucrose starts to look around the cave more to find semi-hidden notes from you in hopes to help you come back.

"I'm working on a way to get back. Don't worry. I left a few notes here and there on different spots in Mond updating you on what's happening in my timeline. I'm not dead. Don't worry. Take care, please. Don't stress out."

A heart was placed next to it. Based on the deep markings, the note should have been dated thousands of years ago.

Albedo's hand drops to his side. "Sucrose, do you still have the notes about that time machine we worked on?"

Sucrose slaps her hands on her mouths as she looks at the mocking, flickering flames of the fire. Albedo hums and gives his best comforting smile, "Fret not. I would have done the same thing." It is not comforting at all he thinks to himself when Sucrose starts to crumple to the ground and weeps.

Albedo sweeps his eyes around, spotting another note, presumably made by you on the floor beside his table. It's something he overlooked. He kicks a few pebbles on the ground to read the writing better.

"Unbelievable," he breathes out. Some snowflakes from out the lab flew inside and resides on his hair making it shine. The cold is forgotten and Sucrose ends her tears with sniffles.

"Mister Albedo, what did you see?" Sucrose stands to where Albedo is, reading the note out loud.

"Ha. Made you look Albedo. Stop crying Sucrose. There's more notes on trees and rocks in Mond. Check out our spots. I'll come back. I promise."

I'm actually excited for this! It was fun to write it was inspired by a reddit post somewhere... not exactly sure where but ik it's reddit ahhhh as always, ty for reading!

<<next>> (part two)

[tea-and-spoons]

What happens when... I develop a new food allergy?

Whether this is your first food allergy, or the most recent in a long list, it can still be a rough adjustment and overwhelming amount of change.  But as someone who has gone through this more than twenty times, I promise you it’s not the end of the world.

The majority of this post is related to severe, anaphylactic food allergies, but I’m of course always going to advocate for being careful, and some of this will apply to milder allergies too.  This advice also works if you were just diagnosed with celiac disease, or another condition that makes you sensitive to cross contamination.  I’m going to let your doctor handle the medical side of this, but I’m hoping this post will cover all the other things you need to know!

I made some pretty thorough lists of things to check, replace, or clean to make sure you’re safe from allergens- I’ll put those at the end of this post.  It is a lot- recruit a non-allergic friend to help if you can!

But before I get into the lists, here are some other things I’ve learned about getting a new food allergy.

-Update your doctors, including your dentist.  And also update any emergency info you have around, like your medical ID in your phone.

-Research other names for your allergen and what it might be found in.  Food labelling can be very sneaky, which is Not Cool, but you get really good at reading ingredient labels once you know what to look for.  I would stay away from googling too many other allergy related things though, it’s an easy way to get into a panic.

-Talk to the people you live with.  Hopefully they’re good about it, but they might take a while to understand, or might even be angry and resistant, which honestly is beyond me.  If this is your situation, I am so so sorry.  You deserve to feel safe in your own home, no matter what.  If you can set some ground rules and get people on board even a little bit, that will help, and hopefully everyone will come around eventually.

-You should also talk to your partner, or anyone you might be kissing (or who might be kissing you, even on the cheek.  Hi grandma.)  Their foods, medications, reusable water bottles, and toothbrush are all possible ways you could get sick.  So even if they haven’t eaten allergens in hours, it could still be on their toothbrush and that can be enough to cause a reaction.  This research article (Maloney JM, et al. Peanut allergen exposure through saliva: assessment and interventions to reduce exposure. J Allergy Clin Immunol 2006; 118: 719-724.) found that waiting at least an hour and having something allergen free to eat was the best way to de-poison-ify for someone you want to kiss.  I’ve also heard from other allergists that 3-4 hours is the right number.  So I would ask your allergist what they recommend for you.

(note:  I would like to keep this blog safe and friendly for spoonies of all ages, but if you are in need of more information about dating and allergies, feel free to message me and I’ll send you some links!)

-One thing that surprised me with some of my food allergies was the cravings.  Sometimes I never want to even hear the word “pineapple” again, but especially if it was something like eggs that are more a hidden ingredient, I struggled with cravings for foods I couldn’t have anymore, like French toast.  And I’m not even someone who likes food that much!  So I’m here to tell you that the cravings are normal, and will subside in a few weeks.  It also helps to just not be around things you can’t eat for a bit.  And to look for replacement recipes for your favorites- there’s so much out there, it’s really impressive.

-The other common (emotional) reaction is anxiety.  Anaphylactic food allergies can be life threatening, of course you’re scared!  It is 100% normal to be worried and afraid and anxious and terrified, especially after an allergic reaction.  That response happens to help keep you safe!  But it’s also exhausting, and can get out of control.  My best advice here is to follow the concrete steps you need to be safe, and then tell yourself that you’ve done everything you can, you know what you’re doing, and even if something goes wrong, you know you are prepared.  You can be prepared and careful AND not have to be scared all the time.  There is zero shame in seeing a therapist about this too, they can really help.  (My advice here is borrowed from my lovely therapist!)

And here are the lists I mentioned earlier!  I hope this helps you feel safer and more prepared.  Severe food allergies are a big change, but you got this!

Things to replace:

-Toothbrush (and maybe toothpaste too)

-Any food that is still safe but might be cross contaminated (like flour, sugar, spices, things that go on toast… basically any open containers)

-Kitchen sponges and rags and anything else that gets used to hand wash dishes

-Chapstick and lipstick

-Stim toys that go in your mouth

-Cast iron kitchen equipment

-Cutting boards

-Reeds (if you play a reed instrument)

-Ice cubes, if you have a tray in your freezer that people reach into

Things to clean:

-Kitchen itself, including all appliances and countertops

-Anywhere else food is kept or eaten (such as pantry, dining room, couch, in your purse, desk, locker)

-All cooking supplies (plates, pans, silverware, crockpot, basically everything)

-Potholders and oven mitts

-Pillowcases

-Dish towels

-Doorknobs

-Handles

-Light switches

-Remotes

-Cloth napkins

-Reusable water bottles

-Kitchen drawers that might have gotten crumbs or residue in them

-Retainer or mouthguard

-Lunchbox

-Toys and fidgets

-Purse/backpack

-Writing utensils

-Car steering wheel, controls, and handles (especially if you’re the driver)

-Inhaler, spacer, nebulizer, CPAP mask, and other related equipment

-Oral thermometer

-Face masks

-Phone, computer keyboards, touch screens

-Hand or wrist braces

-Video game controllers

-Any musical instruments you play, but especially if it’s a wind instrument.  Plus the case, and any cleaning equipment.

-Whatever your toothbrush is stored in

Things to check the labels on:

-All your food (what you have at home, and anything new you buy)

-Toothpaste

-Floss

-Shampoo and other hair products

-Hand soap and dish soap

-Deodorant

-Makeup and chapstick

-Medications

-Lotions

-Sunblock

-Pet food (if their food turns out to contain your new allergen, you might want to clean or replace their toys as well.  And a bath for the pet themselves!)

If I missed anything on my lists, please feel free to add on in the replies!  If you need someone to talk to or have questions, you’re welcome to message me.  And I promise this gets easier 💙

[wipbigbang]

2021 Schedule + FAQ

Schedule

All times are by 8:59pm PST. Convert time zones.

Sign-ups Begin- April 1st

Sign-ups Close- April 15th

Check In #1- April 22nd

Check In #2- May 15th

Snippets Due- June 1st

Art Claims Begin- June 17th

Check In #3- June 22nd

Check In #4- July 6th

Rough Drafts Due- July 15th

Posting Claims Begin- July 23rd

Posting Claims Ends- August 1st

Final Drafts/Art Due- August 7th

Posting Starts- August 8th

FAQ

What is the WIP Big Bang? Good question! This is a Big Bang with one goal in mind: to clean out your drafts folder. These are stories that were unfinished for whatever reason, that authors returned to and completed, and the art that goes with them!

Do I need a Livejournal/Dreamwidth/AO3/etc. account to participate? No! You don’t have to have an account on anything to participate, though you will need to have somewhere to post your finished work. Having one or more accounts will help for you to follow what is going on with the bang (we crosspost to Livejournal, Dreamwidth, Tumblr, and Twitter at the moment), but they are not required to participate. You can always leave comments anonymously or with an opensource ID.

Will I get emails about the bang? We do send out some emails, mostly for snippets and art claims and to ensure communication between authors and artists, but please do NOT rely on getting an email to remind you of due dates. We currently do not keep an updated email list of participants, so we only send individual emails as needed rather than mass emails.

However, email is the fastest way to communicate with the mods. If you have any questions or are having trouble communicating with your artist/author, please do email us! We will do our best to respond quickly.

Is there a minimum word count? 7,500 words, but the sky's the limit, right?

What do you mean by minimum word count to enter? This is a WIP Big Bang, therefore we ask you to have at least 500 words of your story drafted when you enter. It's okay if you have posted a few chapters of your fic already (you never know when the muse deserts you, after all), we just require you to refrain from posting more until posting begins here.

Is there anything not allowed? As long as you wrote it and you want to finish it, you're welcome to participate. Just bear in mind that original work is only allowed on AO3 if it has a fannish connection and might make it hard for artists to work with. But we'll make a dedicated post for that if there will be any.

What are 'Check Ins’? These are a way for us to see what you've been up to and for you to make sure you're still on track. It will give you a little nudge/reminder if you need it, but they are not compulsory.

What are the snippets requirements? In order to allow the artists to make art for the story they claimed, we require you to supply three snippets from your fic, between 500 – 1500 words each. The snippets will be sent to the artist after they have claimed your story. They're to help the artist match your story for artwork the best way he or she possibly can. It’s helpful to choose scenes or parts of scenes that you feel best represent your fic, but don’t feel like they have to be perfect to be submitted. Along with the snippets, we will send your artist the basic fic info and your email, so the two of you can collaborate more if you would both like.

What are the rough drafts requirements? For the rough drafts, stories should be at least 80% complete. You will not have to turn them in to us, just assure us that you are at that point. Anything less is at the discretion of the mods and those authors should speak to one of the mods asap.

What is, and do I need, a beta? A beta is basically a person who goes over your work to make sure that there are no spelling/grammatical errors and they can even be of assistance in helping you with story lines, etc. It is highly recommended that a beta looks over your work before posting. If you are having trouble finding a beta, try this post.

Where can I post my fic/art? Stories and art can be posted to your own personal journal, tumblr, ff-net, AO3, or wherever you like. For those of you with AO3 accounts, we will set up a collection that will go live on the day of the posting. Also, we've enabled moderated posting to the comm (Livejournal and Dreamwidth) for members. We will post a template for posting artwork and stories to the comm closer to the posting date.

If you don’t currently have an AO3 account but would like one, you can contact the mods for an invitation code to see if they have any available. You can also add yourself to the AO3 Invites Request queue.

How do I know when to post? Posting will be tiered; you'll each get your own posting date that you and your artist will decide on together. There will probably be four fics, plus art, posting per day between August 8th and September 30th. The post with date claims will go up on July 23rd and you'll have to choose your date by August 1st.

If you want to post your story in chapters on AO3 or your own blog (or wherever you usually post), you may do so starting August 1st. However, posting has to be finished by your chosen posting date to the comm. One of the things we're hoping to do with the posted dates is to give everybody on the comm a little bragging time in the spotlight. You know, "this story was incomplete for this long, but I finished this sucker." If you don't have time to post on your chosen posting date, you can queue up a post ahead of time and we can post it on the date you picked. Either way works for us. Art will be due on the chosen posting date to the comm.

Is there a minimum/maximum requirement for my art? There is no strict minimum, but we do ask artists to remember that the authors are writing a minimum of 7,500 words and your artwork should reflect that. You can do anything you like, including banners, wallpapers, icons, mixes, vids, gif sets, picspams, etc. Suggested guidelines for art are 500x500px (or equivalent of smaller pieces like banner + spacers, cover + icons, etc.) for traditional art, digital art, and manips; 2 minutes for vids; 10 songs + cover art for mixes; and 6 images for gif sets and picspams. We also ask that when you are in contact with the author, you work with them to see if there is anything specific they would like (i.e. a wallpaper, book cover, etc.). The art is your work, but having ideas doesn't hurt!

What are 'art claims'? The claims are when anonymous summaries of the story go up for artists to choose from. It is based on a 'first come, first served' basis and artists may choose up to three potential stories (in case their first choice is unavailable). If there are more stories than artists, there will be a second round of claims wherein artists may choose a second story to work with. And on until all stories are claimed for art.

If a fic up for claiming is rated explicit (R, NC-17, etc.), please only claim the story if you are over 18 years of age. Some authors may be uncomfortable working with underage artists on explicit works. We do not verify ages in any way for the bang, so this is solely on the honor system.

Can I get an extension? Community extensions may be given in the event that the majority of the authors/artists need one. They may also be given individually under certain circumstances, but this must be discussed with the mods and will only be a short extension for posting. If you are certain that you won’t be able to finish your story in time, please let us know by June 13th.

What do I do if I have problems or concerns about my author/artist? Sometimes authors and artists do not get along and this may cause problems with working together. If this happens to be the case with you, please email the mods and we will try to do what we can so that everyone has a chance to have fun at WIP Big Bang!

If you have not heard from your author/artist in some time after trying to contact them, you can reach out to us via email and we will try to get in touch with them for you.

Can I drop out? We have high hopes that everybody who signs up can actually finish the round and share in the joy of the reveal with us, but real life can unfortunately get in the way and we completely understand! If you feel like you just cannot finish in time and no amount of assistance from us can help you, just let us know by July 13th (if at all possible).

Is it possible to be banned? We do have a banned users list. We hope to use this to encourage participants who are having issues to communicate with the mods. We want to help you! The way the ban works is that participants, either authors and artists, will be banned for dropping out without notifying a mod. This means that anyone who has not posted or talked to a mod by the time the posting period ends will be banned. Dropping out is not in and of itself a banning offense, so please do not panic if you have to drop out! We understand that there are many reasons you may need to drop, and we want to work with you.

Bans will last one round or until the issue is resolved, whichever comes first. To resolve a ban, authors will have to finish and post the story they signed up with and artists will have to finish and post the art for the story they claimed. Three bans will result in a permanent ban from the bang.</lj-cut>

I have a question/concern that’s not mentioned here. If you need help, you can always contact a mod and we will do our best to make sure that you get your story/art finished. The best and fastest method of contact is through our email, wipbigbang@gmail.com.