#sometimes it feels like i’m rewatching the later seasons of got when i read the latest jjk chapters
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Okayyy but real talk on jjk 239 and beyond. Just my general ramblings below the cut if you’re interested.
1. Listen, I love Gojo as much as the next person. I wrote a 300k+ word fic about him lmao. But I just do notttt see him coming back whatsoever. I appreciate y’all in delulu and I’m with you on some level! But realistically, I just don’t see it happening. Keep the delulu strong and prove me wrong tho 🩷
2. Does anyone actually think that Higuruma is going to survive? Because I don’t lol. Why would I when we’ve seen Sukuna kill everyone he comes into contact with? And if he dies, it’ll feel like a rehash of Nanami (i.e., killing the older male mentor/fatherly figure to Yuji) and that’s boring because we’ve seen it before.
3. Where the actual fuck is Nobara and why hasn’t her death been confirmed/denied at this point? I’m tired of this off screen bullshit.
4. Whereeeee the fuckkkkkkk is Yuta!??!?!??! I feel like I’m back in the Shibuya arc where every other chapter I was yelling into the void about where tf Yuta was.
5. Lol. As fun as this current Kenjaku v. Takaba fight is, does anyone actually think Takaba is going to be successful? I know Takaba has all this potential but like… does Gege seriously expect the fandom to be satisfied with Takaba killing Kenjaku when fucking Yuki (a special grade) couldn’t? Bffr.
6. I am now Team Sukuna lmao. Let him cook and destroy everything. Who’s gonna stop him when the most powerful sorcerer couldn’t do shit and instead was part a pointless fight that ultimately meant nothing? Like come on. (Secretly praying for yuji to beat his ass tho)
7. If Kenny is doing his shenanigans for the “mad scientist does wild shit just because he can” trope then I’m bored.
8. I’m bored.
Anyway. I’ll continue to rant about this series because it’s like a bad car accident that I can’t look away from. Here’s to hoping Gege returns to form and makes me eat my words ✨✨
I fucking doubt it tho
#jjk ramblings#jjk spoilers#jjk 239#jjk manga spoilers#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#geto suguru#ryomen sukuna#higuruma hiromi#yuji itadori#gege akutami#kenjaku#nobara kugisaki#ignore me I’m just ranting lol#I will indeed continue to read this story every week even tho gege is actually driving me insane these days#this is all in good fun#I can’t lie tho#sometimes it feels like i’m rewatching the later seasons of got when i read the latest jjk chapters
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I rewatched Merlin for the first time in years and collected my thoughts.
Merlin was such a baby in the first season I forget just how tiny and innocent he was.
The number of times Merlin has been suspected of witchcraft and then got out of it is so hilarious like yea here’s this actual wizard but don’t worry he’s been cleared of all charges nothing to worry about here haha
accused by the witchfinder
sentenced to death as old man sorcerer
straight up confessing to Uther in order to save Gwen
Gaius is to old for this
Sir Leon puts up with so much shit from the Pendragon family
Somebody please give him a vacation he does not get paid enough for this (having to tell his boss that he married a troll was a real low point you can see him losing the will to live)
He's running on three hours of sleep and six cups of coffee
Corrie guard commander Fox reincarnated as a knight of Camelot (working for a maniacal tyrant in the most dramatic political court the world has ever seen will take a lot out of you)
King Cenred is the medieval embodiment of the King of Hybern like that is exactly how I imagine him when I read ACOTAR (Tom Ellis, as always, was a great casting choice)
Freya deserved better Ik she had to die to keep the Excalibur storyline going but she could have been such a great character (merlin was so sad bring his gf back poor baby)
Lancelot my wholesome baby you are to precious for this world you deserved so much better
I can't explain it but I just know Gwaine would have done well on book tok
Ok I know Morgana was a terrible queen and burned the crops but honestly props to her for paying attention to the paperwork
I can’t tell if Agravaine looked at Morgana like a daughter or if he was falling in love with her and honestly both are very disturbing to me.
Aithusa is the most adorable dragon look at his little face Ik he gets attached to Morgana but seriously I can’t not love him.
seeing him so beaten and abused is so sad please get him some help
We should have seen more of him with Merlin
How Kilgharra hasn't cooked Merlin like a costco roast chicken is beyond me, this dragon must have some sort of immortality driven godlike patience in order to put up with that boy as long as he has.
Gaius please get a hair cut
I’m a few episodes into season five and I hit that point where I know what’s coming and it’s making me not want to finish the show. I don’t want to but I feel like I should.
I crapped out. I made it to the episode where Gwen uses the stable boy to try and kill Arthur and then never finished the season. I knew this was going to happen I haven't made it all the way through the series in years. If I ever make it through the end of season five again I'll be sure to give my thoughts but for now I've fallen back into a Gossip Girl rewatch.
Sometimes I forgot to write things then wrote it down later so it might be out of order but whatever enjoy my musings.
#nine years later this show still means so much to me#I love these idiots so much#why do they have to make such stupid decisions#why do they all have to die#merlin#bbc merlin#arthur pendragon#uther pendragon#morgana pendragon
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Leverage OT3 Casual Touches
(Cont.)
This is mainly for @werewolfsmile and anyone else who wants to shout into the void with me about this ot3!
So far season 4 started off strong with lots of little ot3 moments I’ve been clocking on my latest rewatch. Today I watched “The Office Job” through “The Gold Job” and wanted to recap. Ngl it isn’t much…
Still good things but it was a lot of what we already see which is still beautiful. But mainly it was a lot of leaning, being in each others spaces, and a lot of the handshake. (For the purposes of this post I’m skipping “The Girls Night Out Job” and “The Boys Night Out Job” simply because those two are a whole other beast of ot3 moments that I would like to gif separately and also not a lot of touching (besides the handshake in the boys night) which is what we’re focusing on here.)
“The Office Job” is my favorite comfort episode of Leverage. Everything about is pure gold. Despite Hardison and Eliot arguing the whole time about a sandwich they still manage to pull together in the end and have one of the funniest moments in the episode which is of course topped off by the handshake. Once again mainly in each other’s spaces or leaning this episode.
“The Lonely Hearts Job” also such a great episode of basically the ot3 parent trapping Nate and Sophie and Eliot out here doing the absolute most showing he knows his team in the end of the episode.
As for casual touches a lot with Eliot and Parker (I feel like there’s always more with Eliot and Parker in trying to find more with Eliot and Hardison but mainly they just always lean in each others spaces and orbit each other, compared to Eliot and Parker which sometimes have a similar but different dynamic due to comparing how Parker in the beginning of the series was very adverse to touch. Not from Hardison and Eliot now though:)).
This scene starts out with them with a gap but they gradually get closer (I know this can happen when scenes are reshot. As I always say though let me read the subtext how I want. They were further apart then they got closer soooo)
My favorite thing is the shoulder bumping as they’re walking out. All I have to say.
Here they’re betting whoever gets the highest bid gets a steak which is super cute later because Eliot loses and puts up a fight about making it but then totally has heart eyes and smiles when he “loses” that argument too. Why wouldn’t he make his boyfriend a steak. There’s also a later scene I totally forgot to gif when they’re getting the guy flirting with Sophie out of the way and he calls Hardison (who’s in character) an idiot and I know Eliot did not need to take him down as hard as he did all I have to say.
And once again we have the leaning in each others spaces, shoulder touching, and once again the handshake. None of the other bachelors were standing this close on stage just saying.
Then we have “The Gold Job” where Parker literally gets up to sit next to Eliot? Wonderful. But then there’s some shoving but for context the whole scene was kinda tense because Hardison was running his first con. But then right before the camera changes Eliot moves closer!!!
But then they end up further apart again which I’m assuming may be due to reshoots.
Just generally the comfort between all of them gets me in these scenes. They’ve come a lot way and even though the beginning of season four I feel like shows this a lot more I’m still glad I’m finding scenes with their casual touches as I’m finishing out season 4.
That’s all I have for tonight :D I’m finishing up season 4 tomorrow so I’m sure I’ll be adding to this later.
Hope you like my gifs :) haven’t gifed in so long but I’m happy I’m learning again. Quality still needs work though.
Bonus:
Here’s a bonus gif of Eliot looking like he’s blowing a kiss in the button cam footage in “The Office Job” because I thought it was funny. This is once again getting added to my “why didn’t I notice this before” list. I just wanna know for whom Eliot. :)
#once again#let me read the subtext how I want#gonna be real sad when I get to season five dang#then redemption but still#I think the last time I rewatched leverage I don’t think I watched the final episode#I hate when I finish a show even if it’s a rewatch#leverage#at least I have them#and FanFiction#leverage ot3#ot3: hitter hacker thief#the office job#the girls night out job#the boys night out job#the lonely hearts job#the gold job#inde rewatches#inde rewatches leverage#leverage (2008)#leverage team#leverage tv#tv: leverage
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You know I’ve tried so hard to stay neutral on the whole Lou/Tommy of it all. But he did another cameo, which he apparently upped the prices the 145 a video?? But he did another one and he dismissed all of Tommy’s past behavior as being corny and teasing which…does not sit right with me. Like racism, misogyny, toxicity, silent compliance of it all….is not just being corny and teasing. And then he ends the video by talking about Tommy came in at the last minute to save the day and save Bobby and Athena so everyone should be good with him now….. like now we’re taking credit for Hens stuff too?
Idk none of that sat well with me at all and if he is sticking around for any of season 8 I think I need the show to just be like no more cameos from you or something.
Hi Nonny, hope the rest of your day was great. Don't allow things like this to get to you too much. If you feel you need a break from social media, make sure to take it. There is already enough stress in real life, don't let it seep into your fandom life as well. Take care of yourself first. You deserve only the best.
Now on to your ask:
I haven’t seen the cameo you are talking about. I have no desire to see that cameo either. I’ve watched one of Lou’s cameos, way back in the beginning when he started doing them. I found it funny, if a little weird that someone would pay for that, but to each their own.
I’ve been hearing about these cameos more and more lately. And yes, they have started to bother me. Mostly because it seems that Lou is charging these people up to 125 dollar (I’ve even read 145 dollars) to talk about the things ‘he’ thinks or believes to be true about Tommy or Buck/Tommy. Basically he’s talking about his own headcanons as an actor. Which again, is fine, because if it helps him to act better, why not?
The problem lies in the fact that some people have started taking Lou’s headcanons for reality. They hear what he says and see it as ‘canon’ because (right now) Buck/Tommy is a canon couple. While it is true that Buck/Tommy is canon, Lou’s headcanons are just that, little fanfictions he made up in his head. It’s a dangerous road to go down, because where does it end? When Buck/Tommy eventually break up, a lot of people will feel misled by him. It won’t be pretty.
So therefore, I’ve decided to never watch any of his cameos. I’m not really interested in his fantasies for the guest character he plays on my favourite show. I’d much rather be focusing on what 911 is actually showing us on our screens. I focus on the nuances and little details that they want us to pick up on.
Sometimes there are small things that seem inconsequential, but turn out to be very important episodes later. Everything matters on television. There are no coincidences. The writers craft the story, every single thing is planned out for the scene, the actors act it out and we watch on in complete fascination. There is no room for a guest actor’s headcanons or fantasies in a prime time show like this.
That being said though, if he truly dismissed Chimney and Hen’s plight under Captain Gerrard as mere ‘teasing’, that is factually wrong. If you go back to watch the scenes in question, there is bigotry, blatant racism and sexism. It makes me wonder if he even remembers the scenes in question. Did he rewatch them before he came back for season 7? We’ll never know.
But it does highlight, once again, that it isn’t smart to give this guy a platform to talk about his personal headcanons. He was always bound to say something dumb that would piss people off at some point. And here we are today, pissed off and annoyed.
I also want to remind everyone that it wasn’t Tommy who is the real ‘hero’ in the story of saving Bathena on the cruise ship. It was Hen Wilson, who had a bad feeling in her gut and decided to follow that feeling. She got the ball rolling, then Chimney jumped to her aide, because he always will. Buck and Eddie decided to join in, without hesitation, because again—they always will. Tommy was merely the helicopter pilot who flew them all in.
By that definition they are all the heroes in this narrative, which is why they all get medals next episode. But it is only Hen who was smart enough to follow her gut. If all the others are ‘heroes’? Hen Wilson is the only ‘big damn hero’.
I do believe Tommy might be sticking around for the beginning of season 8, because I’m not sure there will be enough time to deal with a proper break up in two episodes. Unless Tim surprises me and actually does manage to pull it off.
But yes, someone should just tell him to stop doing those cameos if his character is to carry over to season 8. It’s starting to get a little worrisome at this point. Charging people to talk about your own fantasies for your character, feels a little exploitative.
Whatever happens with him in season 8, ultimately I’m not really worried about Tommy to be honest. Lou’s stint on 911 is coming to an end pretty soon, one way or the other.
Consider this topic closed for me now. I’ve said all I wanted and needed to say. I don’t feel like wasting any more of my time thinking about or writing about this man and his cameos. I’d rather spend my precious fandom time on the things that matter: the amazing people I’ve met, watching the show and crying copious amounts of tears over these characters I’ve come to love so much, theorising and speculating about what might happen in the next episodes and next season, and above all talking about Buddie—my favourite pastime. 😊
#nonnies galore#the sordid tale of a man and his cameos#I'm not tagging certain actors; character names or ships#I have no desire to spend my precious fandom time deleting inconsequential messages in my inbox#911 fandom discourse
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Hey! Been a rough day, to cheer myself and other people up maybe just a little, I’m rewatching Season 1 of PJO, and live-talking about things I love about parts of the episode. (Only positivity allowed!) I’m starting with Episode 1 and 2, so read on if you want!
Episode 1
Solid opening. The drums, the lightning strike, followed by the music. The expression on Walker’s face, the rain, which foreshadows Percy as a son of Poseidon. The first few lines lifted directly from the book, THE SCORE!!! I still remember how I felt when I first watched it, and I was in awe.
The kid who plays younger Percy is so expressive, it makes me giggle. His face when the counselor tells him it’s all in his head? Priceless. I think he’s returning for Season 2, and I’m so excited to see him again.
The coloring getting so much more vibrant when Grover entered his life?! I’m obsessed, Grover and Percy are platonic soulmates. And the way Percy immediately got defensive when Nancy hit Grover with her backpack? I love them.
Chiron has such a powerful voice, the casting department never misses.
Virginia was the perfect casting for Sally Jackson. She radiates such a warm energy. And the way she’s immediately teaching Percy to question the stories he’s been told about the gods. The lighting is also so warm, representing how warm Percy feels when he’s with her.
Mrs. Dodds is another perfect casting. That voice Megan has is so unique, and works in a way for that character that I could have never thought of on my own.
Grover’s compassion never fails to amaze me. The fact that he talks about how Nancy could be struggling is so incredible.
Also, I love the small details like Grover giving Percy the meat in his sandwich and Percy giving him the cheese. Just small stuff like that which shows how long they’ve known each other, how great of a bond they have, how being thoughtful and considerate to each other comes so naturally for both of them.
I like how you can already kind of see the age difference between Percy and Grover in this scene as well, where Grover talks like he’s older than he looks before he even reveals to us that he’s 24. He talks about life with a lot more experience and wisdom than Percy, even though developmentally they’re kind of at the same level. Again, the subtle details are incredible.
Again, what inspires Percy to action is a sense of protectiveness over Grover. When Nancy throws her cheese at Grover, that’s what makes him stand and go to fight her. Sure, Grover is Percy’s satyr protector, but Percy is incredibly protective of him, and it already foreshadows Percy’s fatal flaw of loyalty as well.
The way Mrs. Dodd’s costume melds into the Fury is such good design. I’m obsessed with it, and her costuming is SO GOOD.
The glance Chiron and Grover share, the way Grover looks so guilty when Chiron tells Percy Mrs. Dodds doesn’t exist? I love it when a character is in conflict with themselves and their duty.
Walker has such incredible comedic timing and delivery. He’s mastered the sassy teenage boy in all of his work.
Aryan truly gave me a new perspective on the character of Grover in his performance, which will become more evident later. But Aryan has such incredible micro expressions, and he really understands Grover and his relationship with Percy in a way I feel a lot of the fandom sometimes doesn’t. In this scene with the headmaster, he’s absolutely incredible, you can see Grover fighting with himself to do what will protect Percy, even if it hurts their friendship.
GROVER LOOKING AT PERCY BEFORE SAYING HE SAW PERCY ASSAULT NANCY I’m sick Aryan you sick man how dare you.
I just praised Walker’s comedic acting, and it’s worthy of praise, but I feel like in PJO, he really got to show off his emotional acting as well. Again, this becomes more prevalent later, but all the actors in this show do the most incredible acting with just their eyes, and Walker is no exception. In almost every close-up of an emotional scene, Walker has the most expressive eyes. You will probably see me talking about it constantly throughout my commentary.
In the scene with Chiron, it broke my heart seeing what years of emotional gaslighting has done to Percy. He’s unable to talk about what he thought actually happened, even with someone he likes and trusts, especially after he was “betrayed” by Grover. It makes me think of all the ADHD kids who are gaslit about their problems and are told it’s a character fault rather than a disability they can’t help. And again, both Walker and Glynn kill it in this scene.
THE SCORE I’m sick it’s so underrated
The sinking feeling when Percy is walking to his apartment and we hear Gabe yelling. We automatically understand what’s going on in Percy’s home life.
Also the detail of Percy knowing the plumber’s name? He’s so incredibly sweet
Gabe is clearly trying to get a rise out of Percy, and it’s so emblematic of a lot of abusive relatives who want a rise out of you, then immediately turn it against you. Love it.
I like the details sprinkled in about how Gabe abuses Sally. (Benefitting from her financially, controlling her phone, deciding when she can leave the apartment, etc.) It’s subtle, but weaves a story all on its own.
Both Percy and Sally are combative, and I love the mother/son parallels.
This show goes so far to humanize Sally in the most beautiful way. This becomes apparent in later episodes too, but the little details like listening to music and trying to unwind in the rain to be near Poseidon and the way she mirrors Percy in so many ways… I’m obsessed.
The way Percy mumbles “It really wasn’t my fault” into Sally’s neck when she hugs him, and the way he melts and hugs her back so tightly. The way Sally closes her eyes and just holds him so tightly. Walker and Virginia absolutely NAIL Sally and Percy’s relationship. We as the audience also feel the relief of being reunited with Sally that Percy feels in this moment.
Percy’s little smile when Sally says she believes him? So cute and such a small detail that works so well
Percy is so quiet, and Sally immediately picks up that it’s because of Grover’s “betrayal.” Then when Percy continues being upset, she realizes it’s something more and asks if there’s anything else he wants to talk about. Again, the little moments add up to really flesh out Sally and Percy’s relationship.
When Percy says he’s scared, that’s when Sally realizes just how dire the situation is, and she immediately makes plans to get him to a place where he will feel safe again. (Camp Half-Blood!) Also, the fact that Sally is the only person we’ve seen Percy actually be vulnerable with? Obsessed.
Again, Persassy? More like Sally-sassy! (Not as catchy, I know.)
Walker killing it with the comedic facial expressions as always.
Back to the opening scene, the foreshadowing of Kronos, and just the imagery of that single lantern held by a skeleton figure in the distance? Sends shivers up my spine. Also reinforces the fact that while Kronos is rising, he’s still weak right now. And the stronger he gets, the more he affects Percy’s dreams.
Also, Kronos mocks Percy’s vulnerability with his mother by repeating the fact that Percy is scared. Makes him intimidating, as we know whoever this figure is has been watching Percy for a while now, trying to decipher who he is.
SALLY WIPING AWAY TEARS I’m unwell. She puts on a brave face for Percy, but she’s terrified. Again, the humanization of Sally has been one of the best things to come out of this show. Virginia my beloved.
THE RACING love it.
The subtle foreshadowing of Percy’s father with the cabin on the beach and the seashell details, the set designers WENT OFF with this.
Pausing to talk about these two lines: “I found the marshmallows that don’t burn too easy.” “I don’t think it was the marshmallow’s fault I wasn’t paying attention.” Sally’s expression after is so heartbreaking, first of all, but these two lines tell us everything about Percy and Sally right now in the story. Sally is doing everything in her power to make life better for Percy and to make him feel less alone, and despite this, Percy is still alone and feeling unworthy and unlovable. He blames himself for the things he can’t help, like his ADHD. Sally did the best she could with Percy, but she could not protect him fully. And that’s so heartbreaking. Again, the little details and moments add up.
Sally staying quiet and letting Percy say what he needs to say until he doesn’t have the words anymore, then she steps in to help him. She’s so incredibly empathetic.
The shift in music when Sally asks “What did she say to you?” HELLO THE SCORE IS SO GOOD
THE FACE TOUCH WHEN PERCY ASKS ABOUT HIS DAD?!! Virginia you did NOT have to go this hard
Sally tearing up when trying to explain to Percy, I’ve said it so many times, but it’s so good.
Again, Walker with the comedy. He’s incredibly talented.
Sally crying when Percy says he’s wrong and broken? Shut up Virginia I CANNOT DO THIS-
“Baby no-“ STOP IT
Sally’s protective voice when someone knocks at the door, Sally my beloved
Seeing Grover so anxious really amps up the tension, we’ve always seen him so calm so far, and it really works when we see the shift.
Walker and comedy. Enough said.
The orientation speech Grover gives in the car, Grover my beloved.
Grover apologizing to Percy is so important to me. Grover cares about Percy so much, and desperately wants his friendship and support. Even though Grover did the right thing and he knows that, Percy is still hurt, and so Grover puts in the effort to make it right again. I love you, Grover.
Back to the orientation speech, I love Grover he’s truly a camp counselor.
I love the comedic aspect of Percy Jackson as a series. The comedy makes the emotional beats really stand out. The Minotaur wearing underwear? Hysterical, I love it
Sally’s determined face?! Truly mother
When the car crashes and she puts her arm over Percy? Mother.
Grover immediately going to get Sally and Percy out the car despite being injured? I love him, Percy protect him PLEASE
Sally means business. I love the shift in Virginia’s voice whenever Sally goes into protective mom mode versus when she talks to Percy.
THE LIGHTING FROM BEHIND PARALELLING THE LIGHTING IN THE MUSEUM FLASHBACK SCENE
Sally’s voice breaking when she says “you are not broken.” I am unwell
Sally confidently says, “It’ll be okay.” But then she sees Percy’s fear, and she melts. Again, so many little details in Virginia’s performance that just make me tear up.
Can’t wait to see Sally with a shotgun in Season 5, this scene with Sally and the Minotaur is so badass.
WALKER’S EYE ACTING IS BACK BABYYY
The glowing sword, I love it.
Percy only really acts up when someone he loves is hurt or in danger. He attacked Nancy after she bullied Grover, and now he’s attacking the Minotaur after he “killed” Percy’s mom.
Sally reaching for Percy as she dies, stop that I’m already on the floor
Percy’s hero moment immediately followed by the collapse, I’m weak.
ANNABETH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Amazing final frame, I love this episode.
EPISODE 2 BABYYYYYYY
ANNABETH CHASEEE y’all I’m gonna be praising Leah like crazy get ready bitches.
Grover once again watching over Percy as soon as he had recovered from his injuries, Grover cares about Percy so much.
Grover trying to cheer Percy up, then being with Percy when he’s sad? And the SELF BLAME Grover sweetie you did NOTHING WRONG-
Percy has only become more closed off now that his mother is gone, he straight up refuses to talk to one of his closest friends
THE CAMP LAKE I love this location so much for Camp.
This episode sets up a lot of little mysteries; who is this guy in the Hawaiian shirt? Why is there an empty wheelchair? Who was that girl standing over Percy? It keeps you engaged and makes it more fun to watch.
Jason was the best possible casting for Dionysus, I can’t wait to see him again in Season 2. He absolutely nails his lack-of-fucks attitude and sass.
PERCY AND DIONYSUS BANTER so fucking good
Grover I love you.
Again, both Jason and Walker are great at comedy, so the fake claiming scene makes me die of laughter. Also shout out to Diet Coke.
THE FAKE SINCERITY IN DIONYSUS’S VOICE CRACKS ME UP SO MUCH
The gold detailing on the leg Chiron was shot in is SOO GOOD the costume and makeup people put so much thought into each of these characters
BOTH GROVER AND PERCY LOOKING AT MR D AT THE SAME TIME IS SO FUCKING FUNNY
Grover and Percy are so protective of each other, Grover immediately trying to follow Percy and Chiron because he wants to ensure Percy is okay makes me tear up oh god Grover my beloved
Aryan’s goat walking is so fucking good. Also, we’re starting to see how expressive Aryan’s eyes are, he and Leah both have those big brown puppy eyes that you can’t say no to and they express so much emotion with them.
Camp Half Blood my beloved, I am obsessed with the design, and I can’t wait to see it again in Season 2.
The owl being unscripted is so fucking cool.
This is a world literally built for people with ADHD to thrive, thus the reappearing pen sword. Percy can’t lose it, which is a common problem for people with ADHD (like myself!)
The cabins have such cool designs, I wish I could see them all more closely.
THE WAY PERCY’S VOICE BREAKS WHEN HE SAYS “Never.” I AM SO UPSET SOMEONE GO ADOPT HIM PLEASEEEE
Hermes cabin not giving a fuck about Percy is so funny, they really don’t care.
The hopeful music when Percy looks around the cabin, followed by the shift down when he doesn’t get his own bed, the shift up when he sees his mother’s gifts, then the shift down when Luke appears?! This score slaps so fucking hard, and really dictates the emotions of the scene, making it clear how Percy is feeling in each moment. I love it so much.
Time for Charlie Bushnell praise. Charlie kills it as Luke, no questions about it. He really adopts the big brother role so quickly and naturally. Charlie also just radiates genuine charm and warmth, so it’s easy to fall in love with Luke and trust him immediately with Percy. Charlie kills it as Luke, and I will talk about his villainous stuff later, but he’s so good at all of it.
Again, with the little character details. The tree nymph pointing out how Grover has been picking more at his horns, showing how much Grover has been worrying about Percy. “You’re too hard on yourself, Grover. You always have been.” The fact that the horn picking comes back later in the season is also just SO GOOD
Grover went above and beyond for Percy, asking the Cloven council about Percy’s mom. Even when Percy is angry at him, Grover is determined to do right by him. It becomes obvious why Percy chose Grover to go on his quest with him, despite the prophecy warning of a betrayal.
Mr. D and Chiron’s relationship is so cute. They have such great chemistry together. The little glances they share while Grover talks is so cute.
Grover is determined to tell Percy the truth because he knows it hurts Percy when he’s lied to. Grover knows Percy so well and cares so much, it’s absolutely incredible.
Percy’s dream on the beach, in the same clothes he was in when he lost his mother, symbolizing how he’s still hung up on Sally.
The beach collapsing as Percy’s mortal life crumbles away, I love the symbolism in this dream.
Again, Luke reassuring Percy. It’s interesting to think that right now, Luke really does have the best of intentions with Percy, and wants to make him feel less alone and welcome at camp.
The subtle shift when Luke says, “Hermes is my father” CHARLIE THE PERFORMER THAT YOU ARE
Again, the slight bitterness in Luke’s voice when he talks about the gods, it’s just the right amount of subtle, and Charlie just kills it. You can already see hints of Luke as a villain on second watch through, but if you were a new viewer, it’s harder to pick up on. Details like this make the viewer more likely to go back and rewatch episodes, and I love it
Clarissa is an intimidating bully, but not in an irredeemable way. Love her.
Charlie is so good at the quiet cockiness that Luke has in the beginning. He’s a bit egotistical, and we can see hints of that now.
The way Luke’s face drops in sympathy when Percy is trying to figure out how to make his father stop ignoring him? You can already tell that Luke sees so much of himself in Percy.
The casual disabled representation, I love it.
Luke’s quiet confidence in Percy, encouraging him gently at every task and standing up for Percy in little ways in an attempt to help Percy find his place. I love it so much.
“We’re gonna find the thing that you’re good at. I know it.” Luke has been exactly where Percy is now, and he knows exactly what Percy needs to hear to help him push forward. Luke is the older figure Percy desperately needed in his life, and it makes the betrayal hurt so much more.
Luke’s slight bitterness about the burnt offerings? Again, subtle foreshadowing, and I love it, Charlie you killed it
Percy burning one of the jellybeans from Sally’s gift and trying to talk to her? I love it so much.
Again, the fact that Percy will only be vulnerable with Sally, even when she’s dead. He waits until everyone is asleep before he even tries a burnt offering, and sneaks off into the woods so he’ll have privacy. My poor sweet boy
Percy trying to stay happy for his mom, even though he’s not sure if she even listening, it’s so cute and sad
Percy’s determination and stubbornness is so good, and I just love it. You can already see hints of who Percy will be, and you can already start to see glimpses of a Greek hero in him.
Clarisse is the perfect bully for this series, and she’s genuinely intimidating. She is the perfect rival for Percy, and sets his character growth into motion. She’s a perfect antagonist in this episode.
Annabeth Chase, my beloved. I love her.
Annabeth trying to appear cocky and mysterious until Percy confirms that he recognizes her, then immediately trying to play it cool? She’s so funny, Leah you absolutely KILLED this scene.
Annabeth reminds me of me so much as a teenage girl, trying desperately to prove herself by being mysterious and stoic, but deep down just being such a sweetheart Leah absolutely understands Annabeth as a character and really brings her to life
Annabeth smiling, then noticing Percy, then immediately dropping the smile to try and look cool, it’s so funny and such an Annabeth thing to do.
I love the fact that they’re already foreshadowing Thalia. It’s also a great way to set up the stakes of forbidden kids.
Luke’s subtle devastation when he says Thalia didn’t make it? It ruins me.
Again with Luke having faith in Percy, by implying that Percy may be the demigod Annabeth’s been waiting for? (Also, that subtle romantic foreshadowing? I love it.)
Luke really is such an older brother figure, I love it so much.
“Not you, sunshine. You’re with me.” So fucking adorable, Annabeth really decided to just pick on this new kid so that she could win capture the flag for the fourth time in a row, and I’m obsessed with it.
The way Percy is scrambling for Annabeth’s approval and validation is so adorable.
Again, the foreshadowing is incredible. “You still don’t get where you fit into all this, do you?” This foreshadows Percy being the kid of the prophecy. Also, the adjustment of the armor strap very subtly foreshadows Annabeth’s romantic interest in him before she even falls for him.
Also, side note; I think at this point, she hasn’t developed a crush on him yet. I think the crush starts to take form in Episode 3. But I love the way Annabeth’s interest in him doesn’t steam immediately from romantic feelings or crushes for Percy, but out of trying to find her own path. She really fell for Percy when she least expected to fall for anyone.
Her cocky little smile when she puts the cap back on is SO CUTE Leah you ate with that
Showing off Luke’s skills as a swordsman, I love it. Also, his unquestionable faith in Annabeth is so sweet, and his faith in Percy as well to know what needs to be done to win the game.
Percy really is just a nerdy teenage boy, it’s so cute the way he just sort of messes around when Annabeth “leaves” him alone in the woods.
“Flag’s that way, it’s not here.” IM LAUGHING SO HARD the fact that Percy immediately gave up on getting glory when Annabeth rejected his help and is just sulking is so fucking funny
I love the way Clarisse toys with Percy. She’s like a lioness stalking her prey, makes her so much more intimidating.
The moment Percy is hurt, we see him lock in. We see just how skilled of a swordsman he is, and we can see Clarisse realize this and lock in as well.
The subtle devastation on her face when Percy breaks her spear, the only gift she had from her father? Even the antagonist is getting treated like a complex character who has her own motivations and feelings, I love it,
Also, I love the contrast between Clarisse and Annabeth through the way they fight. Both are incredibly skilled fighters, but Annabeth’s kills are always quick and efficient, relying on cleverness, and often letting the enemy defeat themselves, much like she did with Clarisse. Clarisse is more prideful and gleeful; she follows her emotions when fighting and finds enjoyment out of toying with her opponents when she knows she has them cornered. She fights hard and fast, using large weapons to intimidate her opponents and flashy movements to throw them off. This Capture the Flag game sets Annabeth up to be a clever and powerful warrior, while revealing the cracks and faults in Clarisse, thereby adding character to both of them. It’s done so well, I love it.
Luke leading the flag, showing how great of a leader he is and how skilled of a fighter, so fucking good.
Annabeth has a quiet confidence to her that Leah portrays so fucking well. So far, Annabeth has been kept in the safety of camp, where she knows her opponents well and knows how to defeat them. Her plans always work, so she’s self-assured and confident in them. Later on, when she enters the real world, we see her get shaken and lose some faith in herself, only for Percy and Grover to help her regain it. Anyways, when Percy is upset at her, she doesn’t care because she knows her plan worked, and she takes pride in it. Annabeth’s confidence is a huge part of her character and character arch, and Leah portrays it PERFECTLY.
Still, she’s empathetic. When she sees Percy is upset, her face shifts, and she helps him up and tries to explain to him. Annabeth is smug sometimes, but she cares so deeply about the people around her. She only shoves him in the water when she realizes she can’t properly explain it to him without showing him. Again, Leah nails these little shifts and moments in Annabeth’s character.
The little smile Annabeth has when she’s proven right about who Percy’s dad was? Adorable.
I love everything about the claiming scene. The simple yet powerful visuals, Percy’s heroic expression, the look on Luke’s face when he realizes just who Percy is, the voiceover by Chiron, and the SCORE!!!! It’s all done so perfectly
The loneliness in Percy’s new cabin compared to when he was in Hermes’? So devastating, I love it, really showing how Percy needs to face his new path alone, and how small he feels in the face of it.
Percy slowly realizing what Chiron and Mr. D are asking of him and being horrified, Walker Scobell the actor you are-
Again with Percy’s stubbornness! I love it. And it feels natural, not like a bratty kid trying to get out of doing work.
This to me is really where we see how the show is leagues better than the movie. I love Logan Lerman, he’s one of my favorite actors, but the fact that they aged Percy up in the movies is a mistake. Here, we see Percy for what he is; a terrified kid in over his head who’s lost his mother, the only person he felt he could trust, who has been thrust into this new and scary world. In the movie, his refusal at first to go on the quest feels like an angry teenager throwing a fit about being given responsibility, but in the show, we can see that it’s just a kid trying desperately to hold onto what little control left he has in this new and scary world. It’s so good.
“I am Sally Jackson’s son!” That’s my fucking golden BOY-
Grover my beloved, coming in and dropping a BOMBSHELL in the middle of that fight I love him.
Grover is offering a compromise, and a chance for Percy to regain some control over his life by offering up the fact that he can save Sally while getting the bolt. It really shows how well Grover knows Percy and how much he respects and loves Percy. I’ve said it so often, but Aryan absolutely KILLS IT as Grover, he really was the perfect casting.
The parallel between Percy and his namesake, Perseus, just trying to protect and save their mothers, I’m so ill I love it.
I want to do the other episodes, I’ll likely to them 2 at a time! Please reblog or comment with your own observations, I’d love to hear them!
#heroes of olympus#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson#annabeth chase#percabeth#grover underwood#walker scobell#aryan simhadri#leah sava jeffries#trials of apollo#charlie bushnell#luke castellan#dionysus#chiron#pjo series#pjo spoilers#the lightning thief#sally jackson
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Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch from Mercury reminded me that I actually do enjoy watching anime, and since I have a bit of a backlog of ones I’ve either watched a few episodes or haven’t started at all, I was inspired by this post to make a scorecard of anime that I intend to watch over the course of this year.
My self-imposed rules are I will not start any other anime before I have finished these 16 (with the exception of Witch from Mercury, see below), I will be watching them with Japanese voice acting and subs, and that, gvien my experience with watching Witch from Mercury on a weekly basis, I won’t try to binge and instead watch an episode or two each day, since that will fit better into how busy life can get, and also give me more time to really think about what I just watched before moving on.
The shows above are listed in chronological order of release (1979-2023), but not the order I’ll necessarily watch them in (I like having the freedom to pick and choose), with additional notes below:
1.) Mobile Suit Gundam (1979; dir. Yoshiyuki Tomino): A more experienced Gundam fan who is also fond of Revolutionary Girl Utena recommended this and War in the Pocket (see below) if I was curious about other Gundam shows. Since I’ve been meaning to watch some older anime for awhile anyway, this seemed like a good series to start with, especially with its historical importance to the medium. I have previewed the first episode and I think it holds up well so far. I will only be watching the 43 episodes of the original anime at this time, so not the movie compilations or the sequel series like Zeta or ZZ (yet).
2.) Mobile Suit Gundam 0080: War in the Pocket (1989; dir. Fumihiko Takayama): I mentioned that I would permit myself freedom to choose the watch order, but since War in the Pocket is a side-story set around the same period as Mobile Suit Gundam, I feel it would be better to watch the former after the latter, so that I’ll have a better understanding of the setting.
3.) Goldfish Warning! (1991; dir. Junichi Sato): Goldfish Warning! has an interesting history, in that it’s something of a predecessor to Sailor Moon: the latter would reprise the former’s timeslot, much of its staff (including the director and his assistants, among which was a young Kunihiko Ikuhara), and a similar style of slapstick comdey. As a bonus, I’m 99% certain that one of the leads, Chitose Fujinomiya, would serve as inspiration for the Revolutionary Girl Utena character, Nanami Kiryuu. I will be watching both the 45 episode anime series and its accompanying film.
4.) Neon Genesis Evangelion (1995; dir. Hideaki Anno): The thing that piqued my interest in this show was a short review that I read years ago (don’t remember when or where), and that may have been translated from Japanese iirc. The review talked about how gender roles in Eva were inverted compared to mecha shows that came before it, such as how Shinji acted more like stereotypical female characters from such shows, while Asuka acted like what you’d expect from stereotypical male characters. I don’t know how true that observation is, but it stuck with me, and I’ll be keeping an eye out for that. I will be watching the original 26 episodes as well as the End of Evangelion film. I’m debating if I also want to include the Rebuild of Evangelion films, but I’m currently leaning towards watching those sometime later.
5.) FLCL (2000; dir. Kazuya Tsurumaki): I watched the first four episodes at a con, but never finished, so I’ll be doing a rewatch from the first episode. I’ll be watching the original OVA series, but leave the sequel seasons for another time.
*6.) Princess Tutu (2002; dir. Junichi Sato & Shogo Koumoto): I needed to watch this anime after watching an amv of it titled Dance of Death (it’s got spoilers, including for what I’m assuming are the last episodes, but if you don’t mind that or have already seen it, I highly recommend giving it a gander). I watched ‘til around episode 16~ until real life interrupted, so I’m starting over and watching it from the beginning. This is the first of the three shows I’m currently watching, and up next is Ep. 02.
7.) Michiko & Hatchin (2008; dir. Sayo Yamamoto): Multiple reviewers I trust said it was good, the setting and premise sound pretty different from anime norms, and I’m intrigued by the bit of trivia that apparently the director made it explicitly for office ladies to enjoy after coming home from their shift.
8.) Star Driver (2010; dir. Takuya Igarashi): Pretty sure I learned about Star Driver from this chart tracing the work of some of the members of Be-Papas (not *everything* anime-related comes back to Revolutionary Girl Utena, but a lot of it does, yeah ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ). I’ll be watching the series, but I’m not sure about the movie since apparently it’s a compilation film, so I’ll have to think about it.
9..) Penguindrum (2011; dir. Kunihiko Ikuhara & Shouko Nakamura): I’ve heard mixed opinions on this one, but it’s an Ikuhara-directed anime so I want to watch regardless, and form my own opinions about it. I’ll watch the 24 episodes, but I’m not sure about the Re:cycle films that came out recently.
10.) Mob Psycho 100 (2016; dir. Yuzuru Tachikawa, Takahiro Hasui): Someone made a vhs recording of the show’s first OP that ran on loop, and that was apparently enough to lodge itself in my brain. I watched the first season and a couple episodes of the second, until real life interrupted, so I’ll start fresh and watch all three seasons, plus the two OVAs that were apparently made.
11.) Sarazanmai (2019; dir. Nobuyuki Takeuchi & Kunihiko Ikuhara): Another Ikuhara-directed anime. I was halfway through before real life interruptions, but watching 11 episodes should be relatively easy.
12.) Sleepy Princess in the Demon Castle (2020; dir. Mitsue Yamazaki): In retrospect, I slept on this show, as I hadn’t realized it was another comedy by the director of Monthly Girls’ Nozaki-kun, not to mention that the premise is a nice subversion of a classic fantasy trope.
13.) Shadows House (2021; dir. Kazuki Ouhashi): I dug the gothic fantasy vibe I got from the review I read. I will be watching both seasons.
*14.) Bocchi the Rock! (2022; dir. Keiichirou Saitou): Repeatedly saw the protagonist compared to Suletta Mercury due to social anxiety, and am staying for the show’s willingness to experiment with animation. This is the second of the three shows I’m currently watching, and up next is Ep. 05.
*15.) Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch from Mercury (2022; dir. Hiroshi Kobayashi & Ryou Andou): The whole reason I started watching this show was this post. And now I have brainrot am perfectly normal about this show. Starting with Ep. 02, I watched this show every Sunday it was out, and intend to resume doing so in April. It is possible that I might not be able to finish this show in 2023, since previous Gundam shows have run about ~50-ish episodes, and this show’s predecessor, Iron-Blooded Orphans, was initially slated to run only 25 episodes, only to reveal that the show length had been doubled in what would have been the last episode. So, I’ll finish Witch from Mercury in either 2023 or 2024.
*16.) The Magical Revolution of the Reincarnated Princess and the Genius Young Lady (2023; dir. Shingo Tamaki): Another lead compared to Suletta, this time due to rescuing a bride from her jerk fiance and being really gay. This is the third of the three shows I’m currently watching, and up next is Ep. 04.
#anime#mobile suit gundam#mobile suit gundam 0080: war in the pocket#goldfish warning!#kingyo chuuihou!#neon genesis evangelion#flcl#princess tutu#michiko & hatchin#star driver#penguindrum#mob psycho 100#sarazanmai#sleepy princess in the demon castle#shadows house#bocchi the rock!#mobile suit gundam: the witch from mercury#the magical revolution of the reincarnated princess and the genius young lady#my writing
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So I rewatched one of my fave cartoons ever recently
eene is so far in the rearview mirror for me now that I forget a lot of what it was initially like when the show was airing on tv. Like I couldn’t remember why some people thought s4 was a step down from s3 (even though I agree s3 is my fave). But I read someone’s review of a twist of ed that jogged my memory. Basically the reviewer was disappointed that they missed the opportunity to change the status quo at the end. And it hit me that there are s4 eps that are waaay more enjoyable knowing that we get s5 and the movie later. They aren’t BAD they’d just be kind of a bummer if s4 really was the end. I really disliked take this ed and shove it because it felt like such a grim note to end on. So while I do like s4 this realization made me remember why it left some people sour. That being said I wish s4 got way more credit for its silly goofy eps! It definitely wasn’t all bitter.
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Here’s a possibly hot take: if anything s5 PROVES their friendship is still strong. Like Edd has every reason to be busy with school things and still chooses to be attached to the hip with slackers like Ed and Eddy? It feels unfair to me that this season gets blamed for being this dysfunctional era of the show. There are iffy moments here and there sure, but there are way more positives imo. I’m a s5 defender. It does commit a few crimes (a couple eps feel boring and they do more gross jokes?) but it’s pretty great. My least fave season is s1 (it’s just a little undercooked sorry).
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I kind of wish the line in Edd’s character bible re: always being ready for action was more popular with fans. He’s a stick in the mud in a funny way not in a stops the plot in its tracks way! He’s open to silly stuff even in the later seasons! He just has to complain and be annoying (affectionate) first. I remember some of those more hypocritical writing moments confusing me as a kid (like do you want to be here?? lol) but in hindsight it just doesn’t feel that serious anymore. Edd is there because those are his friends, he likes doing the scams, there’s no ‘guilty by association’ and he wouldn’t be better off with the other kids since people love to forget he’s an outcast too.
I wish I could remember more of what it was like pre-movie. It’s so easy to handwave away some interpretations now that there’s a legit conclusion.
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It feels like the abusive households theory is more prevalent than the (lame tbh) purgatory theory these days. The only thing I disagree with is that I don’t think any of the Eds’ parents are like. hellspawn or anything. I think there is neglect in both Ed and Edd’s households but they don’t hate their kids they’re just imperfect. Less malicious intent and more… they could do a lot better lol. I think Eddy’s parents are pretty good (comparatively?).
Admittedly though Ed’s home life is super hard to pin down bc the iconic WHAT HAPPENED TO THE STAIRS moment is taken so seriously. But Kevin’s parents put chains around the tv and cookie jar when he gets grounded so like!! what is real and what is cartoony exaggeration in this universe!!
On that note I actually think Ed’s bedroom being in the basement is… really cool? It would be concerning if there’s a lot of mold down there, but I always thought a teen (pre-teen in this case) boy would love having a cool spacious lair for a bedroom. He has his own tv even! I’m willing to bet the boys spend the most time in Ed’s bedroom than anyone else’s (which is so weird considering Eddy’s is on ground level AND has its own door. like hello that should be the hangout spot).
I could talk more but this has been in my drafts long enough. Sometimes a 20yo Canadian cartoon can be so personal.
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GANGSTA. - ギャングスタ - PART 1
CRIME, ACTION, DRAMA
GANGSTA. by Kohske
(8 volumes, hiatus) Mangaka Kohske-sensei is sick and works on updates when she can. There are chapters beyond volume 8 in JP that haven't been collected into a volume yet here.
Available in English here
Anime - Yes. I'll admit it's crunchy, poorly paced, and disappointing because the studio went under literally a few days after it finished airing and it shows, but it’s still fun? They did cut stuff from the manga and there's so much they didn't adapt, so I'd recommend reading it. I'm begging for a remake and a season 2 or something...
Links to my other manga posts here
~Part two of this post is here~
We've got a meaty post today, lads! Sit down, because I'm going to gush about the series that's going in my all-time favs and I've made it my whole personality lately. I'm here to push the GANGSTA. agenda!!! I’m about to be so damn annoying.
Back in 2015 I was going through college hell and wanted something to chill with during my meager downtime. And so the GANGSTA. anime answered the call. Watching TV while shoveling food into my face was my only free time.
A whopping 8 YEARS later now that I'm a freelancer and have a flexible schedule allowing me to get into manga more than ever before, among other factors, it was finally time for me to pick this up. Naturally, I forgot a lot over the years, plus having consumed the anime in my suffering college student frenzy, much of my memory is fuzzy. What I DO remember is that the setting and aesthetics were cool, I loved the characters, and I was mad crushing on Nicolas Brown.
I'm pleased to report that after rewatching the anime and reading the manga, the me of 8 years ago had excellent taste.
Fellas, I present my 34-year-old homicidal, feral, sweet-as-a-button, baby girl ❤️
***Trigger warnings for everything you can think of for this series.***
This post will be divided into: Why You Should Check GANGSTA. Out - What's It About? - Lots And Lots of Character Analysis (And Gushing)
I'm going to give an elevator pitch and spoiler-free summary on why you should check this series out since I feel like it's — dare I say — slept on. Later, I'll get into spoilers and give a heads-up when I do.
Why You Should Check GANGSTA. Out
Diverse cast- disability, race, and age.
Disabled main character- Nicolas is deaf, mainly communicates in sign language, and I personally feel like the way it's handled is awesome (more on that in the character analysis). There are also great portrayals of mental illnesses.
Primarily adult cast- our main trio are 24, 34, and 35. All different races/mixed race. Also, they look like this->
The cleavage crew. My babies are amazing, just look at them!!!
Cool setting.
AWESOME character writing- we're never spoonfed, and there's so much you can glean about the characters from bits and pieces given to us — which is what a large portion of this post will be dedicated to discussing. Tons of nuance.
FOUND FAMILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Found family? You have me hook, line, and sinker.
You can tell it was written by a female author if you know what I mean... Hear me out, I get into this more later. Please don't roll your eyes at me. I'm going somewhere with this.
Other than GANGSTA. I'm specifically thinking of Dorohedoro right now. It's the only time I've ever laughed at a boob joke and the whole, "Oh no, I walked in on a girl naked" joke and all that. Also, the bikini top/scantly clad outfits in that series don't give me the ick. Don't ask me to explain, I can just taste it. It's the execution.
While there are characters who are in romantic/sexual relationships, there are also a lot of platonic/familial relationships as well. I like romance as much as the next person and I can get really sappy sometimes, but I also want more non-romantic relationships between men and women. Sorta tired of the whole "a man and woman are in the same vicinity so they must bang, they HAVE to pair up". Again, love me some romance, but more of the other stuff too, please! And GANGSTA. delivers wonderfully. Some of the best depictions of the dynamic I crave that I've ever seen.
Look at this banger opening:
youtube
The ED is awesome too!
And last, but certainly not least, I'd like to present my "Nicolas Brown propaganda" video of this clip from Episode 1:
Look me in the eyes and try telling me this isn't the best thing ever. My man kicked a cop car in to stand up for Alex so they could save her and take her home!!! Also, Nic is voiced by Tsuda Kenjiro, the VA behind my other fictional crush, JJK's Nanami 'Husband-Material' Kento! Fair warning, I'm not going to shut up about Nic.
I have to admit, it’s difficult for me to wholeheartedly recommend the anime because of what I mentioned at the very top of the post. The voice actors were the best part of the anime, while the animation was… meh, and the pacing is not great. But it's still enjoyable! The manga destroyed me so good, though…
BTW if you're one of those people who are hesitant to get into a series that's on hiatus like my bestie, she HATES reading stuff on hiatus, I implore you to give it a go anyways. I successfully roped bestie into committing hehehe. It managed to absolutely wreck me in 8+ volumes. It's so worth it and I was very happy with how the last currently out chapter (#56) ended.
In case you were wondering... No, I still haven't recovered from Banana Fish.
There's also a completed spin-off series, GANGSTA: CURSED (I enjoyed it. I like action but it was almost too action-heavy for me. My fav parts of the main series are the quiet moments), a light novel GANGSTA: Death of Anosmic Stray Dogs (it was okay, Nic was funny but not enough of him, tbh I’ve read better fanfics), and drama CD's. I actually ordered the drama CD's to listen to later, but I'm traveling right now, and idk when I'll be home to pick up my package, so... And I read the extra manga that came with the Japanese Blu-rays (I enjoyed it).
What's It About?
Our boys Nicolas and Worick are the local "Handymen" doing odd jobs from deliveries and construction, to prostitution and homicide. They go way back, but their relationship is much more complicated than it initially seems.
The grungy city of Ergastulum is essentially an open-air internment camp. For who? Superhumans known as "Twilights", also called "Tags" for the tags they're required to wear. Twilights are the descendants of those who took the drug, Cerebret, developed during wartime to create enhanced soldiers. Their children inherit these qualities —making them an unintended consequence — but with a catch. They are forever dependent on consistent doses of Cerebret to stay alive and keep their bodies from shutting down. At the same time, however, it slowly poisons them, significantly slashing their lifespans. They are kept under surveillance, having been herded into Ergastulum, and xenophobia between them and the "Normal" non-Twilight refugees who settled there is constantly brewing. The Cerebret they need to survive is strictly regulated, expensive, and used to keep the Twilights on a short leash. They are in many ways, second-class citizens.
If you watched until the end of the Nicolas Brown propaganda video like I'm sure you totally did, you would have seen the tags dangling around Nic's neck — meaning that Nic is a Twilight. And in order to operate, he needs to be in a contract under someone. This contract puts the holder in ownership of the Twilight. In Nic's case, his contract holder is longtime friend and fellow Handyman, Worick. I'm sure you can imagine that it puts a certain strain on their relationship... Your BFF and roommate legally owning you even if it's to protect you? Awkward.
To make matters worse, Nic is running out of time, fast. The Cerebret, like I said, shortens the lifespan of Twilights. Various factors come into play regarding lifespan, but on average, they live into their 30's. And Nic is already 34 years old. I am... stressed, to say the least. I don’t know how he's going to pull through guys, I really don't.
Genuinely concerned for Nic's well-being. I don't trust Kohske to pull her punches...
Enter Alex — a prostitute the Handymen take off the street and offer refuge to. We learn about the city, the boys, the factions at play, and more alongside Alex, who has been thrown into this world. Worick is a charming sweetheart who I think sees a lot of himself in Alex, especially since he's been working as a gigolo from a VERY young age. And Nico despite his seemingly harsh exterior, is so damn kind and soft... They all are. I love my found family of traumatized dorks *sobs*
It's not all doom and gloom, though! We have funny, silly, cute-as-hell moments, too. And the domestic scenes? The quite, tender moments? Love. Obsessed.
I like how Nic is holding his old wanted poster with his face in the first panel like he's wearing it as a mask or something. And they're in separate interrogation rooms with glass between them but they can still communicate because Nic can read lips and Worick knows sign language. Clowns, the lot of them.
I admit at first, GANGSTA. seems like a kinda lame title. Like, as a native English speaker, if someone told me to check out a series with this title, it would give me pause lol. It really has that late 2000's to early 2010's aesthetic, edgy themes, plus the whole "Twilights" term — which when combined may make you think, "Yo, this looks lame," especially if you were a teen during that time. "Twilight" just makes me think of that Twilight, but we're ignoring that. For me, my teen years were cringe, and I'm sure many of you feel the same. But you know what? Mangaka Kohske-sensei rocks this vibe! She makes it cool! And now that I'm older, it's like, whatever embrace cringe, have fun and all that, y'know? So, GANGSTA. is great and totally not cringe in any way, hush.
She loves edgy characters — and eyepatches. Gosh, she loves eyepatches. And good for her! You do you, queen! I can dig it.
Bonus Nico because he's so damn cute. Love of my life.
But listen, this manga is deceptively deep, guys. You might think at first it’s simply crime, drugs, sex, and violence... But no! There’s more to it. The crime, drugs, sex, and violence are used to great effect instead of just edgy for the sake of being edgy. The plot is great and all, but the real bread and butter for me with this series are the ✨characters✨. I don't care if you have the sickest plot on the face of the planet. If I'm not obsessed with your characters... what are we doing here then?
Seriously, if I'm not willing to cut a bitch for your characters, try again.
It’s time to segue into ->
Lots And Lots of Character Analysis (And Gushing)
Goodness, where do I even start? So many good characters and moments to over-analyze! There's a boatload of stuff I want to talk about and I'm going to try and make it make sense. I’ll gradually dig deeper and deeper into the squad’s character. I do think I'll have to primarily focus on the main trio, or else my hands are going to fall off from all the typing.
Kohske-sensei doesn't spoonfeed us and doesn't treat us like we're dumb. You know when writers don't trust their audience to get something so they beat us over the head with it? Yeah, no, none of that here. Because a lot is implied or hinted at, this is going to be my interpretation of things. If you have a different take, I'd love to hear it! I'm going to just dive into the analysis with any evidence to support my claims, so I'm assuming you already know the story (or maybe come back later after reading the manga?) because from this point...
***SPOILERS UNTIL CHAPTER 56 FROM HERE ON OUT***
This section will be broken up into: Where It All Began - Nicolas and Nina - "Nice vs. Kind" - Worick and Alex - Nicolas and Alex - Nicolas and Worick - Nicolas - The Trio and The Scene That Had Me Bawling My Eyes Out - Brief Shoutouts to Characters I Also Want to Talk About, But This Post Is Already Long Enough
I'm about to get really sappy, so uh, here goes nothing.
(Note: the manga pages/panels I included for reference are arranged from right to left reading order btw)
Where It All Began
Let's start... at the beginning! The hankie. The first chapter establishes what kind of characterization we can expect from our main cast.
When we first meet our trio, Nic and Worick are leaning on a wall overlooking the city while Alex walks below, bleeding. And then, a handkerchief lands on her head. At first, it's not clear which of the Handymen dropped it down to her, but we're led to believe it was Worick as Nic had his back to the wall.
This is the first panel of Nic that made me go, "Well, hello there, sir 👀💦" Don't judge me. And like, why are half the buttons on his shirt undone? Worick too, LMAO. Not that I'm complaining..........
However, when Alex later thanks Worick for the handkerchief, he tells her it was actually Nic's. Awww, cute...
When the Handymen are hired to take out a gang, it turns out Alex is one of the prostitutes in the gang and therefore is going to be taken out by association. But the boys aren't too keen on this, which results in us getting the glorious Nicolas Brown propaganda scene I included earlier in this post. They claim her as their spoils after taking out the gang in order to keep her safe and get her off the streets. They even throw their weight around with the police by threatening to bash their heads in to do so.
This is all to say that while we see the boys do unsavory things like gleefully murder, we can see already that they're nuanced and SO DAMN KIND. They didn't have to do any of it. They had no reason to. They don't gain anything from it, nor do they expect to (more on this later).
Confirmed: They drink respect-women-juice. King shit.
The next day, we see that Nic seems to be acting pretty coldly with Alex. Right away, I took this as he's having a hard time opening up to her despite everything he did the day before to help her at no benefit to himself including saving her from a passed-out Worick LMAO. It's like... he's scared to get close. He doesn't mind her presence, but he stays at arm's length. We later get hints it's probably because of Veronica and he's afraid of getting hurt or getting someone hurt again. But, while running deliveries, we get this scene:
Which to me is Nic announcing that Alex is now under his protection — a fearsome rank A/0 Twilight. Yeah, it's to keep Worick's clients happy, but I think it's protection for her, too. They haven't known each other for a full 24 hours yet and the boys are already like, "Yeah she's with us. Leave her alone."
Nicolas and Nina
When we meet the absolutely precious Nina, we see a lot more of Nic's overt soft side. It's obvious he loves Nina a lot and is super affectionate with her and sees her as his little sister. And she very much loves him back!
I turn into a blubbering puddle of goop every time these two interact.
He goes out of his way to buy her the drinks she likes, holds her hand whenever they walk together, teases her, plays with her, comforts and holds her, and always keeps her safe no matter what. I could scream about every single panel they have together, but I want to highlight some of my favorite moments:
Worick disposes of the guys trying to kidnap Nina while Nic walks her to the clinic, but she stops at the sound of distant gunfire. Nic eases her anxiety by making her laugh and jokingly saying, "I didn't hear a thing," because of course a deaf man wouldn't lolllll. But he knew that she did indeed hear something because he knew what Worick was up to. But, they don't let Nina know that she was being tailed and in danger so as to not scare her.
Nina sleeps holding Nic's hand while he's passed out at the clinic, and when he wakes up he puts the blanket over her, careful not to wake her.
When Nic stays over at the clinic after he's hurt, the next day he jumps around rooftops with his superhuman agility, holding Nina close, simply to entertain this child he cares for dearly.
Alex asks Nina if she's scared of Nicolas, and while she understands Alex's hesitation, she says that, no she's not scared of him. She knows him for who he is, and not just how he seems. She knows he's actually a very soft man.
After all the patients at the clinic die, Nina is having a rough time processing her grief. She's a little girl with an enormous heart and was grieving over people she didn't even know. Nic leaves all the other grown-ups to go sit with her in his lap, against his chest, comforting her. Later, he takes her hand and walks her to Bastard to hear Alex sing and hang out with Loretta for a pick-me-up.
This scene pulls at my heart... Look at how much they love each other, and how much they feel comfortable and safe with each other. You can FEEL it.
After getting shot by Monroe and having seizures from Theo's experimental drug, Nic still tries to get up and go help the gang. Alex goes to stop him, meanwhile Nina... she looks at him with an aching heart, hurting because he's hurting. Taking his sword, she unsheathes it to reveal that it's broken. This causes Nic to have a moment where he realizes he too is broken and useless right now. So he slumps to the floor, allowing Nina to hold him. She was able to convey what she wanted to tell him — that he was in no condition to go anywhere and that she was worried about him — without saying a word.
To no one's surprise, this part had me in TEARS. So much is said with no words.
Nina puts her hands on Nic's, comforting him while he continues to be out of commission. Nic agrees to let Theo have his body to study as he's accepted his ever-looming demise, and Nina is... distraught. She cries for him. She cries while Theo tucks her into his lab coat, arm around her. I think that given Nicolas' history and trauma, having someone shed tears for him and be so gentle to him is extremely important. He spent the first 12 years of his life being abused on multiple levels and made to feel like he was nothing and then lived a harsh life even after he and Worick ran away. Having someone express this kind of emotion for him, this unfiltered love and care is important. Their casual, comfortable, and trusting tenderness is important.
"Nice vs. Kind"
I do want to emphasize that Nic isn't just kind to Nina. He and Worick are kind to everyone who isn't trying to kill them/has attracted their ire, that is. This is important to note for my next point -> Lately, I've been thinking a lot about something that I'm going to refer to as "nice vs. kind". I mentioned this in my AI Art post in a bit of a different context than we’ll be getting into here. While everything I'm going to talk about can apply to anyone, I'm going to focus on "nice guys".
Earlier, I talked about how the Handymen helped Alex without gaining anything or expecting anything in return. In fact, they're letting her bum off them and crash at their place for absolutely nothing. Combined with how our boys are good to pretty much everyone who isn't trying to kill them, I feel like this makes them truly kind instead of just "nice guys". When "nice guys" complain about how women in particular don't "give them a chance" or whatever it is they complain about, I have to laugh. You're being nice just because you want something from that person (such as getting a woman to sleep with you) or because you want to appear nice to people. In short, you're doing it only because you have an ulterior motive or something to gain — and it shows sooner or later. It's being selectively "nice" to people only when you are trying to gain.
Meanwhile, the boys don't do this at all. They aren't good to people because they're trying to gain something (unless it's work-related, they gotta eat after all). They don't care much about what people think of them or worry about "looking good". The boys follow what they believe in and act on it, even if it may seem morally grey or when it leads to them having not the greatest reputation with most people. But those who know them, know. And THAT is sexy and attractive, both in a romantic and platonic sense. When my friends are truly kind to me or anyone, I'm like, "Wow, that was so hot of you bestie."
When Nic was protecting the clinic in chapter three, Alex was scared of him. He unnerved her. Having just escaped from a man who abused her to hell and back, she was already on edge. Nic looked like an aggressive man, just like the last guy. Her initial impression is similar to the impression most people have of him. But he doesn't care about "looking good" because he's focused on doing right by those he cares about. THAT'S SOME HOT BOY SHIT!!!
Theo is great. We love Theo.
But how do I know without a shred of a doubt that they aren't expecting anything from Alex? I mean, isn't Worick having her help them with the business and do stuff for them? Yes, he is having her do stuff, but it's the intention behind it. When Worick asks Alex to man the phone while he's gone because Nic can't do it, he's giving her this task for her own sake. It's to make her feel included and useful and not feel like a burden, but without asking too much of her. I come from a culture that practices what I call "aggressive hospitality". What I mean is, for example, my friends will refuse to let me help clean up after dinner — and aggressively so — because I'm the guest. But I hate this because I feel useless and I'm just awkwardly watching you do all the work when I have two perfectly good hands. Like, PLEASE give me something to do, anything. And that's what Worick is doing for Alex! His asking her to do these little things is a kindness from him to her.
Besides, if Worick and Nic wanted to use Alex, they could have so easily at any time. A woman crashing with two guys after escaping an abusive pimp and is having drug withdrawals in a city where she has no one is an INSANELY vulnerable position to be in. She's quite literally easy prey. It wouldn't be unusual for someone in that situation to expect to be assaulted, to "pay with her body" in exchange.
But the Handymen, never go anywhere near that line. In fact, they completely reject the possibility, which leads us to one of my favorite scenes.
Worick and Alex
Alex's withdrawal symptoms are making her spiral and she's terrified. She needs to be useful. She needs to be useful the only way she can think of... or else. So she throws herself at Worick — but Worick shuts that shit down immediately. He doesn't entertain the possibility for a second. He refuses to use Alex. He could have taken the opportunity to "get some" but instead, he grounds her and makes her feel safe.
One of the most attractive qualities a person can have is making you feel safe, and I don't just mean physically safe. This isn't limited to what women find attractive in men or what's romantically attractive. This applies to a lot of relationships in general. (More on romance later, or rather lack of romance, because I didn't take this scene to be romantic.)
Worick went out in the rain looking for her. He saw that she picked up a John, going back to her old ways — and he never shames her for it. He just wants to take her home and is upset at himself for taking his eyes off of her. He makes it clear she owes him nothing. He reminds her that she's safe now, he's here now. And my sweet, sweet man just starts complaining to her about his crappy day in a silly, whiny manner to cheer her up and make her laugh.
He's like, "Boohoo, Nic fucked up my fancy shirt." LOLLL But seriously, I would trust this man with my life after all this.
The last line in this scene is some of the first instances of Worick being flirty with Alex, but in a way that I believe is another example of his kindness. Yeah, I said what I said. These scenes are some of the reasons that made me go, "I would bet money that this series was written by a female author." Some people might have the kneejerk reaction that these scenes are Worick being creepy, but I would argue that it's totally not the case.
When Alex visits Worick at the clinic, we get the following scene:
Alex is being hard on herself and feels ashamed. She pours out all the anxieties plaguing her mind, completely opening up to Worick. I don't know about you guys, but admitting how I really feel to someone, especially someone I care about and who I want to like me back in such a raw way is one of the scariest things you can do. What if they reject me? Or hate me? Will they think less of me?
But Worick brushes all this away so easily, again, never judging her. And again, he gives her something to do, to look forward to, with the promise of a song. Again, he gets flirty with her, joking around to lighten her mood.
"He's inappropriately touching her, though! How can you say that's kindness?"
Worick and Alex are both sex workers and have been from a young age. They both have trauma surrounding it. They understand each other in a way others can't. If Worick was invading everyone's bubbles and getting all touchy-feely with them, then I'd say yeah, he's being a creep. But he only does this with Alex. And while Alex might playfully smack him when he does, she's never really uncomfortable. She knows that he's doing this to cheer her up (and Worick uses humor as a coping mechanism — you can't fool me, sir. I have you CLOCKED).
If it actually made her uncomfortable, Worick would stop right away. He's earned her trust and continues to do so. This is what the banter and camaraderie between them looks like. It's like when I affectionately call my friend a "bitch" and say "I hate you" because we have an understanding with one another. If I did that with everyone, I would be an asshole. Meanwhile, my friend's mom yelled at her to be nice to me before I dump her ass. I was like, "Auntie... What are you talking about? We're literally having a brunch date together right now." LMAO, that's just how our relationship is and it works for us. In the pages above, you can see them horsing around, Alex "reprimanding" Worick for being a "perv" but quickly dropping her head on his chest and snuggling up to him. SHE FEELS SAFE WITH HIM!
AND HE FEELS SAFE WITH HER!!!!!!!
I didn't take this scene as romantic either btw.
I rest my case. Good day to you.
Actual picture of me reading about these dummies.
------------------------------
~Continued in my part two post~
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Truly. And thank you so much. Well, considering the series does make me happy (including a certain someone), I feel like I will probably be happy while reading it and true. We got hints of angst in the anime and I feel like they’ll undoubtedly be explored more.
Sure thing. And do. It’s good so definitely check it out when you have the chance. I see and I understand. My friend sent me some manga panels of the slightly darker moments and I feel like it would have been difficult to animate. Though I have heard that they’re making another season, that’s coming out this April, so it’ll be interesting to see how that goes. Yeah. The second season is pretty much entirely anime-only and Alois and Claude do not exist in the manga universe. But the third season is based on the manga again so then the anime series becomes good again. Me too. Like I was already excited to hear about him voicing Grelle and then Lawless’s VA also appeared later on so that’s just great. But at some point Grelle did sing and I could connect the voice to Yata’s moment in Requiem of Red.
Don’t worry. That will never happen to me. I look forward to reading long texts from my friends. And mine are as well so it’s totally fine. Thank you. I sent out the replies slightly earlier today since I finally got everything typed out. And looking forward to seeing all of your post stuff. That’s really nice to hear 😊
Thank you. We’ll see since honestly, even though I am looking forward to everything, there are still many chapters to read but I do hope to read more of it because I feel like Servamp has become a new love of mine. Thank you. I’ve given you my essay and hope that it’s all clear enough since it was a ramble but it was the only way I knew how to do it. It’s nothing. Some bits were a bit more difficult to come up with than others but all in all, didn’t take extremely long. Only time will tell with that one. But either way, I am looking forward to learning more about him and of course seeing more of Lawless (and him). But yeah, every interaction is important so they will be interesting to see.
I see. That is a real shame and sounds like it would be horrible in some cases. I see. A part of me figured that after I initially read your message but it’s so horrible that they’ll still fight you, especially if the frames are super expensive. But I am glad that there is an optometrist around that you can go to, even if it does take ages. Yeah. I can imagine that. Like overall, I have pretty okay eyesight since I don’t wear my glasses during the day in the house but I feel like I’d also definitely struggle with reading the subtitles unless I was sitting right in front of the TV. And it’s great that it has great sound quality 😃 And fair enough. Best to use things util you entirely can’t anymore.
I see and that does make sense then. Glad to hear that you also love that song 😄 And wow, that’s a lot of songs. I have a playlist of slightly more than 70 songs that I listen to while posting on AO3 or doing something with my hands that’s routine but I also sometimes listen to songs that aren’t on the playlist while I’m on my computer, doing other stuff. True. I rewatched some Naruto episodes some time ago and just went straight for the dub, not even considering the sub since I knew it was good. Sure thing 💕
C
I'm so glad the series makes you happy and I'm looking forward to talking to you more about it, both through anything you wanna send through the inbox and in our messages through dm's (which I am hoping to get off one more within the next week or so before I go temporarily AWOL to write commissions/passion projects). And I will say they definitely do explore more of everything touched upon in the anime within the manga. Manga often gives more space and time to really flesh out events and characters and development, just because the pacing can be a little more relaxed and it's one of the things about that medium that I really love.
I will check it out when I get the chance and thanks again for letting me know about it. And I do feel the art style of Black Butler, though ungodly beautiful at points, is something that definitely would be hard to animate and still keep looking exactly that way. And I hope you'll enjoy the new season when it comes out. I have been told by another friend that some of the specials are really fun to watch, but it's definitely worth it to devote my time to catching up manga-wise if I feel like getting back into Black Butler, so I might just bump that up the to-read list a little, especially since I've been a little spoiled in that I'm told there's some really interesting things going on now with Undertaker and that was a character I had really loved and found intriguing. I couldn't name a single one of the voice actors from shows I like without googling the characters I first heard them as, so again, just you and the people like you, who can hear those characters all in the voices and know voice actors work definitely make me flabbergasted, in the best of ways, and make me really happy for these artists getting the recognition and love that deserves.
Aww, thank you so much for saying that. That's very reassuring to hear because yeah, when I get talking, I don't shut up and I have been told by friends in real life that getting texts from me can feel a little bit like a bombardment but I'm always just so excited to talk to interesting people and discuss things and share my thoughts. Plus, I adore long replies and walls of text from people, because it shows excitement and enjoyment of the conversation, so long replies never both me either, so you're cool that way. And I have the replies but haven't really taken the time to fully read everything, just in trying to work away at stuff as quickly as possible. And thank you for looking forward to it and I hope I won't disappoint. I will take this point to say, if everything goes well, I'm ahead of schedule enough that I should be able to completely clear the inbox and draft folders and reply to dm's before I take my sabbatical to write that commission and a couple things I've been pining after time to write, like The Ever Young, the delinquent! Shouhei fic, and a couple AO3 planned fanfics. I have two AU posts, two match-up requests, two regular headcanon requests, three drabble/fic requests, and this and another chattering reply to do so really, I'm down to under 10 actual replies to write.
I have never done this in the blog history but am taking the opportunity to ask that nobody send anything new, even chattering, to my inbox. Despite me closing it, I have been getting new requests. I kept one but deleted three. I really need a little bit of radio silence, just for a week or so, so I can really buckle down and write these posts without my focus getting distracted or me feeling like things just keep being added to the 'to-write' pile, please and thank you.
You're very welcome. And I love that it's become a new love of yours and honestly, in my opinion, you're getting through it at a really good rate. And for anyone wondering, and because I did see your dm asking this question, I am not caught up fully on Servamp, I lost the time to really read it shortly after Niccolo was introduced, so no spoilers please past that point. And your essay was both lovely to read and clearly written, as are most of your fandom thoughts! You know I do enjoy hearing them. And thank you again for doing that for me. I have read through all that and it's perfect and just what I had been hoping for and I will make good use out of it!
And it is a shame, because good quality health care should be a basic human right to me, but at the same time, I have to remember to see the positives in it all. And I don't agree with fighting any patient for their prescription, as it's actually legally a right for the patient to know and you actually hit the nail on the head - Vogue Optical frames can range from $200-$400, after my lens prescription is added in there, as I have absolutely horrific eyesight and already wear bifocals at my age. So, not even ashamed to admit that I am a little jealous of people who don't need to wear glasses all the time and terribly jealous of people who don't need to wear them at all because I've been wearing glasses since pre-K haha.
I love music, and I only switched to a digital library because I ran out of space. I still have, in storage, a shit ton of CD's (both burnt and bought) and cassette tapes, plus a couple vinyl records. Music is a pretty constant for me, that or podcasts, way more than I would say television is and every time I sit down to write, I normally make an hour or two long playlist to listen to while writing so I get having a playlist for when you're posting on AO3. Heck, even the shortest of my drabbles on here have at least a 3-4 song playlist I listened to while writing them, and some of my AU's have a 20 song playlist I listened to on loop while thinking them out and writing them. Also, always up for song recommendations, in case anyone has some, just putting that hint out in the universe for ya'll to drop them in my dm's.
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🤝 critiquing the thing but enjoying it .. i get you!! honestly idk when you last watched it (after it got cancelled after s2?) and i will say that like. i was watching it for the first time with a friend who was rewatching + he didn't remember much abt them either. but the relationship just has. dubious foundation (imo) that does Not get addressed 😭 i won't say anything on the actual plot of their relationship but don't be worried 😭 im more talking about the state of the writing for both characters because it never seems to get proper resolutions or depth where it desperately needs it
i really enjoy the concept of yja most of the time (s1, most of 2, most of 4) i just wish the writers didnt bite off more than they could handle because i stare at the writing sometimes. that being said. the middle of season 4 is some of the most fun i think i had its genuinely so so good hehe. hope u have fun with it when u get there.. the state of the overall writing for yja i think acts like an inverse bell curve. theres still good to be found tho :]
u dont feel like a newcomer to me!! theres just like. a staggering amount of history and iterations of every character 😭 i feel like ill never get over feeling new either!! at some point u just give up and frankenstein
happy to share more abt kon tho :) im far from an expert like i havent Finished everything hes in or anything like that but from one "anger is an okay response to grief and trauma" defender 2 another i am clinking my glass against urs 🥂
nooo it’s not giving up, frankensteining IS the goal! i’m reading to ADD to the amalgamation, THIS! is my design!!
in all seriousness, i’m glad to hear that yja picks up in later seasons bc i Did stop when it got cancelled, didn’t even know they had as many as 4 seasons tbh. i was rly just gonna return to this thing blind lol, good to know there’s still stuff to look forward to!
i kinda hated romance as a kid tho so i think going into it now with those nostalgia goggles is giving me that expectation anyway. younger me was preparing current me for the worst 😔👊 god i forgot how annoying romantic subplots were in cartoons, my past is coming back to haunt me…
also i totally feel you on never finishing comics, even abt our faves, we are like this 🤝 we’ll get there tho, slowly but surely…
#man don’t even get me started on character frankensteining i have a whole process abt it it’s an Ordeal </3#danswers#dc#yja#im kinda excited to review s2 it’ll be rly interesting to compare to my s1 thoughts#agh i love documenting my dc thoughts it’s like a personal timeline archive that i’m dragging everyone else into hehe
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spit it out
the opening for this episode is SO sexy and cinematic. it’s insane to watch this now that the show is finished, but i’m trying to stop saying that every time i watch something from any episode from season one.
fallon having (avoided having) a criminal record was such a good character piece. i’ve said it before but i think taking her from a spoiled but ‘edgy, sometimes reckless smart girl who went through different phases and styles’ to like… ‘knows she’s pretty and dresses relatively fancily and works too hard’ was such a weird loss but possibly one that was necessary in later seasons to make room for everything else that the show wanted to try to cram into each episode. it’s an interesting thought that not even the main character, fallon, was spared from the personality chopping block over the years, despite having maximum screen time and the least complicated plot to explore - which you’d usually think would mean more room for deeper character lore. but i digress, i just mourn the fallon who got black out drunk, should have had a dui, stripped in public, and was still a brilliant student who preferred spending time with people who interested her rather than people of status that we only got a single teasing glimpse of.
this showing of steven being equally as manipulative as his family while trying to make sure claudia doesn’t get the carringtons into any real trouble with her statements to the police is absolutely unreal. it’s one of my favorite traits of his that was so hard to see slip away from the plots - though james mackay did such an incredible job making such clear, interesting, and thought-out choices with every little scrap of screentime that he was eventually narrowed down to that i’m trying not to be mad about it. there’s a lot to say about the different ways that we see instances of both blake and alexis show up in steven and fallon differently (as well as adam, and amanda much later on), but i’ll probably save the majority of that for another time.
the connections in this show that blake has that just show up here and there sometimes read as ‘convenient’ to parts of the audience but i always thought it was realistic. the first season especially, but others as well, did a great job of making a sexy show about billionaires and business, injecting in romance and friendship without even having to try to humanize the billionaire class. the audience wasn’t necessarily always capable of catching onto the fact that they weren’t meant to be good people that sometimes got into scandals, but that’s a bout of shit talking for another day.
a good example of this is the way that the characters don’t seem to understand how INSANELY cruel of a move it was to force cristal into making the pr statement after matthew’s death was announced. the only two possibilities are that they all agreed because they genuinely didn’t understand how it would be difficult, which is a sign of something deeper i don’t even want to get into, or they did it as a punishment for being involved with him at all, which i think is objectively even worse.
sam is so funny in the awkward breakfast meeting scene too. it always feels like rafael hits his comedic marks better when the writers weren’t trying so hard.
“you spin scandal for a living which is a valuable skillset for a carrington” sounds like a bit of a soundbite but i love how they slowly developed that to be cristal’s ‘thing’ in the family as she fell deeper and deeper into being one of them. it makes me mourn the loss of both cristal 1.0 and nathalie kelley as a part of the show because of how incredibly she did with balancing the character’s desire to stick to her own morals and being corrupted. (which is extra crazy considering that nathalie thinks she phoned it in. x x)
they gave culhane and fallon the SEXIEST little foreplay scenes in this show and every time i rewatch i have to giggle because i was seriously punching the air as a jeff and fallon shipper at the time. until we got our insanely raunchy office sex - though that victory obviously ended in that special kind of cw-incest-obsessed heartbreak that we all know.
blake’s blatant abuse towards cristal is never more apparent than it is during the matthew-specific plot. it doesn’t go away by any means after the plot wraps up but it’s definitely at it’s strongest during this early era which makes the leap to the end of the season, when cristal tries to leave him and he refuses, much more plausible. the destruction of a woman’s reputation and emotional stability and frankly sanity for a power move is firmly cemented at the top of blake’s worst (personal) plots and the fact that it’s done in secret while demanding the others (namely fallon) treat cristal better just adds to how clandestine the abuse was.
there’s a part in the last 15-ish minutes of the episode where jeff phones fallon to tell her that he’s being investigated for murder because blake sicked his pocket-cop onto him. blake does this to mess with jeff’s business reputation (and additionally fallon’s new move with him) but fallon doesn’t seem to realize the implication of her father being able to call the police on a black man and make him a murder suspect on a whim. it felt like season 1 was ready to talk about things like this but was trying to ease their way into it and then just gave up.
lastly, fallon blowing someone at a funeral is so… chef’s kiss. (i think there’s something to be said about how the fallon vs. cristal fight could have had a clear winner if it had gone on longer than what we’d gotten in the one season and why i think it would have been fallon but i feel like that’s part of a long-winded post about season 1 fallon & cristal).
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My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Please read this and share.
178 notes - Posted May 5, 2022
#4
See the full post
218 notes - Posted April 3, 2022
#3
“Because of color theory” may have replaced “I like your shoelaces”
248 notes - Posted March 7, 2022
#2
when you planned to write but got sucked into rereading one of your old fics
305 notes - Posted February 15, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
I just had a small “oh” moment about Tumblr and how the user base has self-selected over time to certain personality types.
I tend to reread/rewatch things I love a lot. I reread the same fic a hundred times. I rewatch tv shows over and over - and not like I revisit them every few years, although I do that sometimes too, but I will finish a show and decide to rewatch it again right away to pick up on things I didn’t notice the first time through.
My family and many of my friends are not like this, or aren’t as extreme about it. They watch something and that’s it. They read a book and they’re done and they don’t really think about it again. I can do that, sometimes, but not as often as I hyperfixate on something and just go all in for weeks or months, until I absorb every micron of it.
And if I go back to rewatch some time later, I usually skim through to my favorite moments, rather than a complete rewatch or reread.
I have no idea how many other people on this hellsite have hyperfixation tendencies (more than a few I’m sure), but this seems to be the only social media site where content circulates infinitely. I will occasionally see certain memed tweets show up on twitter (dril “I’m not owned” for example), but Tumblr not only recirculates memes we just recirculate cool posts about stuff. No, I did not love the color of the sky clogging up my dashboard but I laugh every time I see it, and I reblog every color theory joke. I love humans are space orc posts coming back around, or “your blood is seawater” etc.
We don’t just endlessly reshare memes, which is what happens on Twitter and somewhat on Facebook, there’s just posts that aren’t really memes but are just popular or interesting that endlessly reappear. And I’d bet a lot of us stop and reread those posts again, even if we know the content (or we’re looking to see if there’s been an addition). We turn cool posts into running jokes, like with color theory and Ea Nasir.
It slots together with my occasional “I want to go rewatch that scene from S1 again for the 1000th time” impulses to revisit things I love.
I don’t know I just saw the “blood is seawater” post and reread the whole thing again and it got me thinking about how seeing old posts cross my dash doesn’t feel annoying (unless every single person I follow is doing it) and it’s more like seeing an old friend.
Also I’d like Tumblr to stop hiding long posts, I can scroll, it’s annoying to have to click back and forth.
6,845 notes - Posted May 14, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
I gotta start creating more original posts, sheesh.
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My Origin Story…
Part 1: My Origin Story…
It all started when I was little. Pokémon Season 18 or Smth Like That was my favorite show. I once binged it for four hours straight, finishing the season, and was ready to restart it, but unfortunately my mom kicked me off the TV and told me to touch grass.
Sometime later I had tried to find the show again. Gone. No longer on Netflix. I was like 7. I didn’t know you could find it anywhere other than Netflix. I travelled across the lands, searching far and wide for the same show I had watched. But none of the seasons were the same. I remember vaguely watching some pokémon movie and not understanding anything and seeing Brock and being like “who the fuck is this???” I even saw like an episode and a half of season 1, which I apparently didn’t like. L take season 1 solos.
Years pass by. I forget about the show. And then, I somehow find out that the season I watched was XYZ. Cool, but it didn’t trigger the obsession. What came next, was my downfall.
Part 2: The Tumblr Sexyman Wiki.
(image from a slide from my pokémon sucks slideshow i made for a presentation “night” with my friends)
Seventh grade. I’m going through the character lists on the aforementioned site and laughing at the ones I recognize. And then I see them. Jessie and James. Team Rocket. I read the page. I got invested. I lowkey started to ship it. I read the bulbapedia rocketshipping page. Little did I know, I had just fallen down into a deep, dark rabbit hole.
Archive of Our Own. Fanfiction.net. Random ass websites, anything I could find that had new rocketshipping fics (except Wattpad cause it’s asssssss). I learned about Jessebelle. I was truly hooked.
Started watching the show. Got to Holy Matrimony, and my brain absolutely sunk its claws into the episode. I was thinking about it 24/7 during school. Just barely keeping it together and not brainrotting all over my friend about it (mission failed but thankfully they hardly remember it). Made some character fanart but i guess art block or something and also how the fuck do you draw Jessebelle’s hair. Uhh other stuff too i don’t feel like listing. I was also rewatching the episode a lot.
(my favorite episode and favorite scene so far!!)
Bonus Section: German idk
okay but the double trouble or whatever german version of the song (gleich gibt es ärger) is straight FIRE that song goes hard it was the only thing i listened to (along with two other german versions of pokémon songs) for a while. like during school i was listening to it always. i tried to subtly get my friends to look at what i was listening to thinking i could arise mysterious intrigue and get them to ask me about it 😭😭😭 also tried watching the series in german but didn’t get very far for whatever reason.
youtube
Part 3: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
eventually i started screenshotting the show and man did things devolve from there. I went from only screenshotting cool scenes to literally almost every other frame. one of the most recent episodes i watched i took nearly 100 screenshots what the fuck bro. anyways i got about over 1,700 screenshots and counting to go through and post, wish me luck!!
man i wrote a lot uhhhh.
yeah.
i hope future me appreciates this short partial biography of sorts 🫶💖✨
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Wow! Great post OP! I’d like to ramble too now lol
(Solitary Cyclist is my favorite story they’ve filmed, and fun fact if you didn’t know, it was the FIRST one they filmed?? I look forward to reading your post about it)
Also, David Burke is also my favorite Watson. As someone who has watched the Grenada many times. Yes. He and Jeremy just have an immediate chemistry as our favorite duo, equals and not taking each others’ crap while caring for each other and supporting and loving each other. It’s lovely.
The next Watson in the show, Edward Hardwick, is still great, but it takes several seasons for me to warm up to him, even each time I watch the show. The dynamic is different, he’s definitely an older version of Watson, but perhaps this works, in the context of the time in the show. The thing for me is that Burke and Brett are immediately on the same page, immediately have their dynamic, it just slots into place. Hardwick and Brett take a little more time to find their dynamic, but once they do it’s golden.
I think because of this, Burke is my favorite Watson, because even though he had less time, the chemistry was just so good.
I’m so glad there is another Grenada fan to interact with! I encourage every fan of Sherlock— especially BBC fans who are curious about the books but are intimidated by reading them for whatever reason— to watch this show. It is so passionate about the original cannon. I wrote an essay on Brett in high school, and long story short he put everything into this role. He played it for 10 years and tried to wring himself out and absorb Sherlock holmes, and it was ultimately to his detriment. It made him really depressed in later life, and that certainly didn’t help his declining health. He read the books, and made a manual for Holmes’ mannerisms, his backstory Brett headcannoned for him, the way he thinks, everything. He always had it on set with him. By the end of his career, he hated Holmes, he said he would never want to meet him. It’s all very interesting, and sometimes it’s conflicting to consume media knowing it caused people pain, but it also feels a bit wrong to discard something when someone poured their soul into it like that.
Hah I kind of got off topic. But yeah Grenada series is the most accurate depiction of the books I’ve ever seen. High production quality, high rewatchability. Plus, Watson never gets married in this version so it’s even a little more queer coded 😂😂 (that’s like one of the only things they changed) (my guess is they didn’t want to deal with the screwed up timeline, so they just. Didn’t.)
I also just found the Russian Sherlock Holmes. I’m only two episodes in right now, but I’d say it’s on a similar level to Grenada as an adaptation, but for very different reasons. It definitely takes its liberties in changing details about the stories and embellishing certain things where it can, crafting a slightly different narrative, but it does it so well. I think in a way it focuses a little more effort into Watson and Holmes’ relationship, which is very nice. They are so goofy together in this version, it’s so refreshing to see Holmes portrayed with actual emotions. (Grenada doesn’t avoid Holmes’ emotions by any means, but it’s a different flavor.) I could rant about it but others have done it better, if you’re curious about Holmes and emotions, go to my page and scroll down a bit, I’ve reposted people’s rants/quotings of the book and it’s all very interesting.
Anyway, welcome to the fandom for anyone joining, and welcome back to others! I know we are all going to celebrate when the last of the Sherlock Holmes cannon is released!
Watching Granada Holmes: On David Burke as Dr Watson
Okay so before I watch the next Granada episode, Empty House, I need to say goodbye to David Burke as Dr John Watson. David Burke couldn’t continue with Granada’s adaptation after FINA due to scheduling conflicts, which led to him helping them find his replacement, Edward Hardwicke.
This post is me processing that in the hope that I can learn to love Edward Hardwicke as Watson without feeling too disappointed he’s not David Burke.
You see, going into Granada Holmes, I’d already been informed that Jeremy Brett is the Sherlock Holmes. This is definitely true. However, at this moment, all I can say that for me, David Burke will be the Dr John Watson.
My tag for David Burke is “he smiles with his whole face”. Right from the start, his expressiveness intrigued me, and made it very easy to feel like I was part of the story. His openness invited me as the audience in. It also doesn’t hurt that he has a very fine voice - I’ve memorised the way he says “Holmes” and other words like “black moods”. They’re very fun to say in his accent!
Watching the Granada Holmes series has felt very personal. For starters, watching TV shows or movies are always immersive experiences for me, due to the way my brain processes information. I get “sucked in” to the story very easily - it feels like I’m another character, almost, observing. It’s also hard because I’m having to process the audio-visual information, the language, the social information, the emotional contexts - and anything they trigger in me from past experiences - all at once.
Granada Holmes is a very safe way to do that, because most of the time, the bad guys get their comeuppance in the end, and the client of the week has resolution, and perhaps catharsis.
It also feels very safe because Holmes and Watson guide me through it. I’ll say more about Jeremy Brett at the end of my entire watch through, but for David Burke, my “oh, you’re my Watson” journey really took flight with the end of Solitary Cyclist.
See, the thing about David Burke’s Watson isn’t just that he’s very expressive. He’s very reassuring. Steady and dependable, but also openly delighted in Holmes’s brilliance. A perfect foil for the audience.
He’s the one who instinctively knows how to handle clients (see: any Woman in Need episode), and takes care of Holmes almost before Holmes knows he needs it (see: Norwood Builder) - and when he’s protecting you/ the client, by goodness do you feel it.
You’ll recall that I had plenty to say about Solitary Cyclist, so much so that I wrote two posts for it. One about the episode recap, and another, which I wrote first, of my feelings about the episode’s context. Look, the Woman In Need episodes always strike a little close to home for me for various reasons. And after my first experience of that in Solitary Cyclist, one of the things that comforted me after was remembering, well, this moment:
[Image description: Watson holds the drugged Violet Smith to him protectively with one hand while holding his gun with the other, a very serious look on his face. /end image description.]
Followed by this one:
Watson: “You may call that love. I call it selfishness.”
[Image description: Holmes and Watson sit side-by-side, staring in disgust at one of the baddies of the story. /end image description.]
In the first scene, Watson was Violet Smith’s physical protector at a time when she couldn’t defend herself. His words afterward, a delightful castigation of the villain. As a woman, hearing someone say those things (and keep saying them in other episodes), whether to the perpetrator as a scold, to the client/ victim in comfort, or to Holmes about how very serious the situation is, has been good.
It helps that Burke’s Watson also has this “softness with a core of steel” energy. The sort of energy that makes one think, if I was in trouble, I would very much like to have Burke’s Watson protect me and tell me it wasn’t my fault and such (while Brett’s Holmes solved the problem that had trapped me in the first place).
Basically, I would very much like to be their friend. Or their honourary relation (which is what they are to the Women In Need).
We see the Sherlock Holmes stories through Watson’s eyes, as he is the Narrator. (A fact brought home by Granada’s adaptation of The Final Problem.) Having David Burke in the role has been very comforting - and fun. We experience his emotions with him, and I have deeply enjoyed it.
#sherlock holmes#russian sherlock holmes#Grenada holmes#david burke#edward hardwicke#watching granada holmes#jeremy brett#sherlock holmes jeremy brett
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i saw you asked what conservatives see in spn, I’m currently at mid s14 of rewatching spn with my right wing father and it’s is... absolutely a viewing experience. His favorite character is dean because my dad finds him personable and funny and he likes the older brother dynamic between him and Sam, and the relationship with John reminded him of his own dad. but my dad also REALLY loves castiel. Lazarus Rising is one of his favorite episodes just for Cas’ entrance, and he really really enjoyed like. girlboss s4-6 and 8 Cas killing people. and it’s incredibly strange because my dad is a Christian pastor, he does prison ministry for inmates every week. so I’d assumed he wouldn’t like cas as a character because his character development is about losing faith in God, but no my dad fucking loved it. he said it reminded him of his own abusive father and he became like... a castiel apologist. when we got to TMWWBK my dad kept saying that he “loves dean, but cas is right in this situation” until cas slaughtered the Republican campaign office lol. when the writers started nerfing Cas in season 9 my dad was annoyed and said “cas used to be so cool ://“, but then when we got to the episode Claire is introduced he changed his mind and said he liked that Cas who was formerly very violent and ‘would kill a child’ had calmed down and learned to love while the opposite happened to dean which cas was visibly saddened by. and at this point I wasn’t sure if my dad was reading it as queer because he also said shit like ‘cas is a christian character’ and then just didn’t elaborate. when we got to Amara he was fucking MAD that they’d given dean a love interest he said it wasn’t ‘satisfying to the plot, he doesn’t even know her”. when we got to Lily Sunder and the ‘I’ll cure you of your human weakness’ my dad was like ‘holy shit. is castiel (spanish slur for gay man).” and i just walked away lol cuz he knows that i am gay too. when I came back he said some shit to me like “listen i change my mind that word only applies to bad homosexuals” and then he was silent for a long time before saying “plus he isn’t even a man. see he was a woman before. also dean doesn’t feel like that so it’s just sad”. when we got to 12.22 and cas being stabbed by lucifer my dad like audibly fucking gasped and started yelling in spanish and did the old man thing where he leaned forward in his recliner. with the widower arc and dean being a little bitch to jack I forget which episode it was but my dad said “i think they are trying to show that he (dean) is acting like his father. because sometimes they compare characters, so I think dean is John and castiel is” and then he forgot Mary’s name for a moment so he said “castiel is his wife.” and then 5 seconds later he went “wait. wait” and paused the tv and just looked at me going “what the fuck. what the fuck. he’s Not Gay!!!! But he is the husband?’ absolutely insane viewing experience. when we got to Tombstone my dad told me “i hope he gets a new female body, because dean loves him but isn’t gay”. sorry that this was so long im unwell
BRO. BRO BRO BRO. EXCUSE ME? I LOVE THIS.
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The Hargreeves Kerfuffle Part 1 : Disastrous Childhood (Prologue)
TUA Series Part 1: Disastrous Childhood
The Hargreeves siblings x Hargreeves!Reader (Familial Relationship)
An idea came to me at 2am after binging TUA S2 and rewatching S1 right after!
BG: The Reader is Number Eight. It follows how you fit into the structure of Season 1 and the family dynamic of the siblings.
This part follows when the young Hargreeves Siblings had their powers manifested and the development of The Umbrella Academy.
Contains: Sibling Angst and Fluff. Reginald being a crappy father but sometimes not really?
The series will consist of 10 parts. Where the reader would have a focused interaction with each sibling. (Eg. After this part, it would be Luther x Reader, then Diego x Reader and so on! –Yes Ben is included)
WC:2649
A/N: This is my first ever TUA fic and I’m doing a series. WOw ambitious I know. Anyways I hope you enjoy! And tell me how you feel about it!
>>MASTERLIST<<
>>THE HARGREEVES KERFUFFLE SERIES MASTERLIST<<
READ: [PART 2] [PART 3] [PART 4]
>>JOIN MY WRITING CHALLENGE!<<
~
On October 1, 1989, 43 women across the globe gave birth despite them not being pregnant when the day began. In news of this mysterious happenings, Sir Reginald Hargreeves immediately went out of his way to find as many of these special babies. He has successfully adopted 8 of these children and you were one of them.
One might think that when a person adopts not one, but eight kids would have so much love to give but they would be mistaken. Sir Reginald Hargreeves—Dad, was not a loving father. It would be a miracle for one to see the man show any other emotion apart from anger. Sir Reginald Hargreeves was distant and treated the children like they were experiments that the dynamic felt closer to a doctor/patient relationship. The children weren’t given actual names, only to be called by their numbers based on the order Sir Reginald Hargreeves had procured them. It was only when Grace, their robot mother insisted they have a real name, were the children given them. And so, the children were:
Number One - Luther Hargreeves
Number Two – Diego Hargreeves
Number Three – Allison Hargreeves
Number Four – Klaus Hargreeves
Number Five – Five Hargreeves
Number Six – Ben Hargreeves
Number Seven – Vanya Hargreeves
And finally,
Number Eight - y/n Hargreaves
For 6 years, the only special thing about the children was that they were miraculously conceived and birthed within a day, the same day. However, on the 7th year , October 1 1996, more strange things started to happen to the children.
It first started with Ben at breakfast. Dad as usual is cold and strict more so in the early morning. ‘Sit up straight Number Six.’ He directed without even a glance up from his newspaper at hand.
‘Yes Sir.’
Beside him you place your hand on his and whispered, ‘You alright Ben? You look sick.’
He gulped. ‘Yea y/n.’ Wiping the cold sweat off his forehead.
‘You sure?’ you questioned, not buying it.
‘Umhmm never bett-----’
You expected vomit to come out but what happen next is something you would never though was possible.
Screams broke out everywhere.
You feel yourself being raised above the table. Looking down, you were 5 feet off the ground held by what seemed to be tentacles.
‘Take that!’ You hear some shout then a thud. Diego had brought down a knife to the tentacle that had suffocated him and in now laying on the floor covered in green blood.
The sight finally snapped you out of your shock, your fight or flight reflexes kicked in.
A quick sweep of your surroundings showed Five and Klaus on either side of you, they too are struggling with the ever-tightening grip of the monstrous arm.
While on the ground, Vanya and Allison are making their way to Ben in hopes of helping him control whatever all this that was coming out of his body. While Luther is fighting off the arms away from Diego who seem to have broken his leg from the fall.
Dad, Mom and Pogo are nowhere to be seen.
You move your head to the left, knowing that Klaus doesn’t do well in small spaces. ‘Klaus it’s okay buddy, Dad would find a way to fic this. Just breathe’ You choked out ‘Just breathe Klaus, everything’s gonna be alright.’
‘mmmm!’ That was Klaus’ only reply but you were thankful to see him to fidget less. He seemed to have taken your advice – how much of the second part of that advice be true, you genuinely don’t know.
You try to move your head to face the right towards Five but no dice. The arm was wrapping itself closer to your neck. ‘Five’ you call out, but it was barely a whisper. ‘five..’
‘Y/N!!’ Five’s scream was the last thing you heard before everything went black.
~
‘She’s broken a couple of ribs and sprained her neck. But’s she’s gonna be okay. Just needs time to rest.’
‘And how long would that time Pogo?’
‘She would need to say in bed for 2 to 3 months, Sir.’
You open your eyes and are greeted with blinding white light. Dad, Mom and Pogo surround your bed.
Grace tucks a stray hair behind you ear. ‘My baby, y/n. How are you feeling?’
‘Sore.’ You reply, noting the coarse sound of your voice. ‘How’s Ben? Klaus? Vanya?—’
Grace cut you off. ‘They’re all fine y/n. Though Ben is a bit roughed up.’ She says truthfully.
‘Number Six has appeared to have powers of summoning monsters with his body and he is currently under supervision.’ Reginald stated.
But something didn’t fit right. ‘But how did you calm him down? The whole fiasco back there was in total chaos?’ Voicing out all your thoughts and questions. ‘No one could get him to take back control, unless…..’ You couldn’t continue the thought. Your eyes go wide. There was no way. It was too harsh, but it was dad after all, he would do whatever means necessary to get what he wants.
Your dad smiles proudly ‘Ah yes. Y/n ever the cleverest of the bunch.’ You had observed that he had addressed you in your actual name instead of your number for the first time in your whole existence. ‘Unfortunately, I had to sedate Number Six. You do understand that it was the only way.’
You open your mouth to argue.
‘No buts, Number Eight!’ Ah and now we’re back to number, you thought.
‘I’ll have Grace by you side whist you recover and Pogo here would relay your recovery progress to me daily.’
He was almost to your door when he faced you again. ‘Oh and Number Eight, When you feel something different or unusual. Do inform me of it immediately.’ And with that he left.
‘Pogo? What does he mean by feel different?’ Your nerves go up, worried about your siblings. ‘Is anyone hurt?’
Pogo sighs, after much contemplation he begins ‘Y/n dear. Today’s happenings uncovered that there are stranger yet special things about you children.’
You nod, not wanting to interrupt but also wishing he would hurry up and continue.
‘Ben isn’t the only one who have gotten powers today. During the kerfuffle, Diego has shown skill with a knife, Luther immense strength and Five had shown ability to teleport.’
Once again you found yourself in shock.
‘Your father has gotten the idea that you children have varying power wish are “activated” so to speak when reached the age of 7.’
‘Haha-OW’ You clutch your side.
‘Careful y/n, try not to do sudden movements—yes and that includes laughing too.’ Mom says, caressing your cheek.
‘When can I see them?’
‘I’ll try to persuade Reggie to allow them for a visit dear. But now I need you to rest.’
~
Sibling Visits are limited to 30 mins a day, right before the bedtime curfew.
All your siblings (expect Ben who was still under strict supervision and is recovering himself) came to see you the following night.
Allison was the first one through your door and ran to give you a hug. ‘Y/n! We are all so worried!’
‘Aww thanks—OW OW OW’
‘Oops sorry’ releasing you from her death grip of a hug.
Seeing that movements still hurt you. The rest opted not to hug you, Klaus and Diego held your hand, Vanya is sitting on the edge of you bed, Luther gave you forehead a quick kiss and Five being Five, greeted you with the typical sibling teasing. ‘Glad to see you not drop dead in front of me.’
Diego showed off his leg cast and asked you to sign it, which you happily did so. Signing ‘Badass as always. -y/n’ beside Ben’s note of ‘Diego is cooler than Batman’
The 30 minutes consisted recaps of what happened the day before, the gushing of the boys showcasing their powers and debating on who’s the most powerful.
And just like that, the time was up and each had to go to bed. Everyone kissed your head for goodnights, even Five.
‘You know I love you right?’ His eyes softer than you ever seen before
‘I know’
‘You really scared me yesterday when you blacked out.’ Five had his tough façade down. ‘I thought you died y/n.’
‘But I didn’t.’ You reach up to wipe his tears away. ‘It’d take something bigger, if you wanna get rid of me.’
He chuckled. ‘Night, y/n’
‘Good night, Five.’
~
3 weeks had passed, and your siblings never failed to visit you. Over that time, Klaus and Allison had manifested their powers. Klaus can conjure the dead while Allison could ‘rumor’ people to her will.
Ben came by 2 weeks later. His color is back to normal, not like the blueish tint it had the last time you saw him. Though he still had a few remnants of bruises and scars across his arms and face.
‘I’m sorry y/n.’ He said leaning on your door frame.
‘Ben!’ You exclaimed. ‘I’m so glad you’re back up and running!’
Ben was caught off guard. ‘You—You’re not mad at me?’
‘Why would I be mad at you?’ You questioned, genuinely confused at your brother’s words.
‘Cause, Cause I almost got you killed. I am a monster.’
You sat up straight at those words, your ribs hurt a bit at the sudden movement, but you didn’t care. Your brother was blaming himself for something he couldn’t have controlled.
‘NO BEN!’
Ben jumped from your sudden outburst.
You motioned for him to come closer.
‘Ben…’ looking into his eyes. ‘Ben you are no monster.’
‘But—’
‘uuh uh I’m not done’ You held his hand in yours. ‘You are no monster what happened then was an accident, nobody knew, heck nobody expected powers to just show up. It was beyond anyone’s control. It took us by surprise.’
His shoulders relaxed.
‘It wasn’t your fault. I don’t blame you for what happened.’
He gave you a bone crushing hug. ‘Thank you y/n. You don’t know how guilty I was feeling.’ Voice muffled by your shoulder, which is now wet with his tears. ‘I kept thinking about the pain I caused you and I wasn’t allowed to leave my room even when I begged dad to see you and say sorry. y/n’
‘Shhh shhh’ Rubbing his back. ‘It’s alright Ben. What’s important is that we’re all here now. Alive, Safe and sound.’.
~
You still have a month left for recovery.
Only you and Vanya are the one left who haven’t had their powers revealed.
Dad had created a group called ‘The Umbrella Academy’ in which he trained your super powered siblings. He even given them codenames to go along with their newfound powers.
Number One - Luther Hargreeves aka Spaceboy
Number Two – Diego Hargreeves aka The Kraken
Number Three – Allison Hargreeves aka The Rumor
Number Four – Klaus Hargreeves aka The Séance
Number Five – Five Hargreeves aka The Boy
Number Six – Ben Hargreeves aka The Horor
With this new training program comes with the downside of spending less time with your siblings. Your traditional Sunday afternoon sister bonding time Allison and Vanya is basically non-existent now. Sure the rest of siblings still drop by to check up on how you’re recovering but it is not as frequency as they once were- you totally understand though, it must be tiring to be part of ‘The Umbrella Academy’ but girl were you still hurt and wanted more than anything to be a part of it.
So, you spend most of your time with Vanya nowadays. You didn’t mind, it is nice to have someone along. Most of the time Vanya practices her violin in your room.
‘That was beautiful Vanny’ you commented after she finished a rendition.
‘Thanks y/n’ Her face flushed. ‘Maybe someday I’d be a famous violinist!’
‘I know you would.’ You say truthfully. ‘And I better get the best seats at your concerts okay? Nothing short of VIP treatment for your favourite sister!’
‘Don’t worry, I’ll make sure Allison would get that.’ Vanya teased.
Placing a hand dramatically to your chest ‘uhh I am offended! I thought I was your favourite sister!’
‘well... you thought wrong.’ Vanya tried to keep a straight face but failed. ‘You y/n are the VVIP guest!’
‘Now that’s more like it.’
~
That night you were tossing and turning in your bed.
In the training room, huge boulders were being tossed onto Luther’s back. He currently had 3 on him. ‘More’ he cried. It was an impressive feat to see. A 7-year-old carry the what had to be at least 5 times his weight.
It was at his 6th block when his legs start to shake.
‘Straighten up Number One!’ Reginald voice came through the speakers.
‘I-I’
‘Fix your posture! And stop babbling!’
He was trembling all over, the weight was far too much and carried far too long for just a young boy.
Any second now, he is gonna be crushed by the boulders.
‘LUTHER!’ You screamed. Cold sweat was plastered all over your face. You were still in your room- but it all felt so real.
You look over to your bedside table, 9:07
Training would have started an hour ago. You had time.
You took the stairs two at a time, bursting into the training room. ‘STOP’
Reginald stood from his seat. ‘Number Eight. What in the world are you doing here?’
‘STOP! Luther is gonna get hurt please stop it--.’ Ignoring his question.
‘Number Eight, what are you talking about? Number One is doing perfectly fine!’ He gestured towards the front.
He was right. Luther looks fine. In fact it looked like it was carrying a light backpack instead of 3 boulders. ‘But- But I saw—’ Then it hit you 3 boulders. 3 not 6.
‘More’ You heard him cried out, just like you had in your nightmare.
You stared at Luther, how could this be?
‘I saw him sir, he is gonna collapse from 6 boulders.’
At this, Reginald took interest. ‘You saw?’
‘Yes, I-I must have dreamt it.’ You slumped against the free chair, defeated. ‘but it felt so real.’
‘Let me everything you saw, and don’t miss a single detail’
And so, you did. By the time you finished, Luther was with his 6th block.
It was exactly like how things went down in your dream. ‘No No NOOOO!’
‘Release him!’ Reginald called at the last second. Standing he faced you. ‘Now y/n dear would you please come with me.’
He didn’t speak again until you were both in his office. ‘It seems to me Number Eight that your powers have finally manifested.’
‘what—’
‘A slight delay compared to your siblings, but I presume that it was due to you recovering from your injuries that your body had focus on your recovery first then powers.’
‘What about Vanya? Would she have powers?’
‘It seems that Number Seven has no powers gained.’ Standing in front of you. ‘But no matter now, what’s important is that you’ve got them.’ He placed his hands on your shoulders. ‘You would do great things Number Eight. To see into the future is a valuable asset to have indeed. For this I shall name you Foresight.’
This was it! You own codename!
Number Eight - y/n Hargreaves aka Foresight.
‘I’m gonna be part of The Umbrella Academy?’ Overjoyed by your father taking pride in you that every other thought left your concern.
‘Yes Foresight. You will.’ Standing straight again. ‘However, your training would only start once you have fully recovered.’
‘Thanks Dad.’ Hugging him and for once showed the affection back.
You wish you could say that it was at this point where you and your siblings finally gotten a loving and healthy childhood. But you were wrong. Things only deteriorated from here on out with the Hargreeves household and by extension the dissolve of The Umbrella Academy.
END OF PART 1
READ: [PART 2] [PART 3] [PART 4]
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