#sometimes being nice to yourself is hard but i am trying my best

[crazylittlejester]

Hey like this is a self care check jes. You good?

hi major!! im alright :) the past week was a little rough but im doing a lot better, i got to spend some time with friends. sometimes i get a bit sad and down and it’s hard to do things i love like writing and then i get frustrated, but im trying to be nicer to myself about that so i spent a lot of today working on homework and taking a break from stuff :)

[ienjoywritingfilth]

a sinner i am

If its so wrong, why does it feel so good?

trope: Boyfriend's Dad PP character: Joel Miller x f reader summary: Your boyfriend Shawn Miller and his dad Joel bring you along to Hawaii for Christmas vacation. Things don't go as planned.

warning: 10/10 on the sexual tension scale, slowishh burn, kissing, grinding, cheating on your bf (but it’s cool, cuz its with Joel and everything is fictional in this universe), alternative universe b/c daddy miller stays alive and hates golf and he has a son named Shawn, no Sarah. rating: E

words 6.8k

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part i : takeoff

The best things in life are the people we love, the places we’ve been, and all the memories we’ve made along the way. - author unknown

"Loving him is a sin; of that I'm fully aware. But a sinner I am." - Bella Jewel

Your boyfriend Shawn brings over two iced coffees as the two of you work on a crossword together at your local coffee shop. You have been filling in the squares quickly.

"Thanks babe," you say warmly as you take the coffee from him. He presses a kiss to your temple, taking a seat next to you. 

"Damn, you're fast this mornin'," he says when he sees all you've filled in. It's a tradition for the two of you; weekend crosswords over coffee. It's nice. It's domestic. 

It's a little boring. 

You're college sweethearts who met your sophomore year and have been inseparable since. And while the love is still very much there the butterflies have unfortunately been hibernating for a while. 

It's normal, you tell yourself when you sometimes zone out during sex. It's normal when you've been together with someone so long. 

"It's so nice to be doing this instead of college essays," you say. 

"Fuck yeah it is." 

This is your first summer of freedom without the threat of schoolwork looming in the near distance. Shawn is starting his master's in the fall and you've just accepted a position at the local museum. 

“Just think I’ll actually be able to enjoy Christmas this year,” you tease. “Unlike someone who’ll be working on essays.”

“Hey now,” Shawn says with mock offence. “I’ll be able to enjoy my Christmas just fine. Actually, my dad wants to celebrate Christmas somewhere warm this year. He's talkin' about some resort in Hawaii."

Shawn comes from money, the son of the infamous Joel Miller of The Miller Company, the premiere construction firm in Texas. This means expensive vacations, nice cars, all of that is normal for him. You meanwhile have had to work hard for everything you have.

Being left behind at Christmas seems strangely unkind for the normally thoughtful head of the Miller family. Shawn's dad has always treated you like one of the family so this news is unexpected.

"Have a great time," you say trying not to be jealous. "Bring me back some chocolate macadamia nuts."

You can admit that even though both Shawn and his father are humble, kind men, you're always a bit bitter that they live so nicely. Leaving you out of their holiday vacation seems especially unkind. 

"He's taking both of us babe," Shawn says with a grin. "You think he's gonna leave you behind on Christmas? After you’ve spent the last six with us?" 

Christmas in Hawaii? Is this a dream? Your pencil lays forgotten on the table as you gape open-jawed at your boyfriend. 

"Are you serious?"

"Babe," Shawn says meaningfully. "My dad likes you better than he likes me. Of course you're invited."

You've always gotten along with Joel. It's impossible not to. He's friendly, funny and charming. There's a reason he's good at his job. And you're a good girl, a kind girlfriend to his son with clear career ambitions. 

A smile breaks out over your features and you pull Shawn into a tight hug. He chuckles, embracing you back, kissing your cheek. 

"Make sure you don’t overpack, okay?" He murmurs in your ear as you giggle. “I don’t feel like helping you haul six bags of shoes for a week-long trip.”

Thoughts of lounging by the pool with a drink in one hand and a magazine in the other while the Hawaiian sun beats down on you is all too enticing. You kiss him fiercely, imagining the time together.

"I can't wait." 

The two of you finish the crossword puzzle all the while talking about the drinks and food and the excursions you'll both take. 

"Maybe once I've got a handle on school we can think about findin' an apartment in the new year," Shawn broaches, his hand over yours.

Sex fades, but this? This domestic stuff you have with Shawn? That's special. That's love. 

“Yeah, I’d love that.”

He gives you a smile, that dimple poking out of his cheek that makes you swoon.

"Ready to go?" Shawn asks, extending his hand to you when your coffees are drained. 

"Yeah," you say with your hand taking his. "Let's go."

When December twentieth announces itself with a thunderstorm you couldn’t care less because you’re at the airport. Your large rolling bag bag is stuffed with cute outfits, swimsuits and even some snorkelling gear. 

"Feels like you got a dead body in here," Shawn laughs as he struggles with the two bags, handing you yours before swinging an arm around your shoulders. 

"I wanted to be prepared."

"Let's go my little Girl Scout," he laughs with a gentle kiss to your temple. You both check in and then find your boarding gate. 

"I'm gonna grab breakfast, you want anything?" Shawn asks as he parks you and the suitcases by the gate full of noisy travellers. 

"Nah, I'm good." 

Shawn jogs off in the direction of a Starbucks you passed on your way in. 

Out the larger windows you can see planes taking off. You've never flown before; you thought that you'd be excited. But at the first view of those planes out the window you feel your stomach drop. 

They’re so big and bulky. How does it fly properly? It couldn’t. What if people shift around too much in their seats? Surely this can’t be a safe form of travel!

You pull out your phone, distracting yourself with a game. You try for several moments but your eyes keep being drawn to the huge planes outside. You grimace, wondering if you should have gotten your doctor to prescribe you something for anxiety. 

"Cheer up," a voice says. "You look like you're goin' to prison, not a five star resort." 

You glance over to see Shawn's dad, Joel, at the other side of you, an amused look on his handsome face. He's wearing jeans and a faded grey Longhorns t-shirt. You're momentarily thrown as normally you see him in dress pants and button downs for work. 

"I'm excited for the resort, just not the giant metal death box hurling through the air that is my only means of getting there." 

"Touche."

Shawn jokes about Joel liking you better then he likes him, but the truth is you and Joel are very similar. Your senses of humour, your ability to read people, your tendency to see the worst in people before they prove themselves worthy.

Shawn is more like his mom, sweet and naive at times, always seeing the good in people. It's ironic considering which parent stuck around to raise him and which one escaped the country six years after Shawn was born. 

Joel takes the empty seat next to you, his kneecap kissing yours as he pulls out his phone. 

"Never flown before," you explain. 

"Ah, I see," Joel puts his phone in his pocket, his attention fully fixed on your face. "Well what if I told you it's actually the safest way to travel?"

"I'd call you a liar."

Joel chuckles richly, his hand falling to your knee and squeezing as he laughs. 

"I promise you, I wouldn't take you on anything unsafe. And if all that's not good enough, you'll have Shawn beside you holding your hand the whole time."

You grin at that, nodding. The thought of Shawn being there does help your anxiety. Joel smiles back, eyes crinkling in the corners. 

"Thank you so much for inviting me along in this trip, Joel. I've always wanted to go to Hawaii."

"S'a beautiful place," Joel nods. "And you don't need to thank me. You're practically family at this point." 

Shawn returns with a muffin and two coffees in hand. 

"Hey dad, got you a coffee," Shawn says handing it to his father. 

"Thanks," Joel says gratefully. Just then the intercom alert sounds 

"Good afternoon passengers.This is the announcement for flight 82B for Oahu, Hawaii. We are now inviting passengers to begin boarding. Please have your boarding pass and identification ready. Thank you.”

“That’s us.”

The lineup goes uncomfortably fast. You stand beside Sean who is talking to Joel behind you, the two of them deep in conversation about football, a subject you couldn't care less about. You are still too preoccupied with the flight, being surrounded by almost all strangers sailing through the sky. 

You're not a fan of heights. So when you get to the door of the plane you hesitate, willing your foot to move. When it doesn't and the flight attendants shoot you a confused look, you feel yourself start to panic. 

Shawn has gone on ahead to grab your seats and place your carry-on bag in the overhead bin, not noticing that you're not behind him. A large hand flies to the small of your back, a comforting gesture. Joel. He rubs there, soothing you. 

"You'll be okay darlin'," he rumbles in your ear. "Remember, it’s safer than drivin' a car."

“Liar.”

Joel’s deep chuckle makes you grin and you allow Joel to gently prod you onto the plane, shooting the waiting attendants grateful looks for their patience. He takes his seat near the front, watching as you make your way to your seat next to Shawn. As you buckle in a thought occurs to you and you move your voice to a whisper.

"Isn't it gonna be kinda weird with us being there all week with just your dad? I mean, sharing the place and all?" 

"Nah, he made sure the rooms were far apart. Plus, he invited his girlfriend to come along so I doubt we'll see much of him."

Joel is a chronic workaholic, often pulling late nights and working on his phone. You’ve seen him out and about with beautiful women at the events Shawn takes you to but never formally dating them. You always assumed to be a lifelong bachelor. You wouldn't blame him, especially after what he's been through with Shawn's mother. 

"I didn't know he had a girlfriend," you say honestly. "Good for him."

"A couple months now," your boyfriend tells you. "You know my dad, mister private. But he took me to dinner and told me about her so I think he's getting serious." 

"That's really sweet," you say honestly. You want nothing but the best for him. 

All of a sudden the plane starts to jiggle, sending people stumbling down the aisles and others gasping in surprise. You reach over and grab Shawn's hand, trying to regulate your breathing. 

"Not so tight, babe," Shawn complains before gently sliding his hand from under yours. "You scratched me with your nails."

"Sorry," you mumble, eyes closed as the jostling of the plane continues.  

You tighten your seat belt before gripping the seat arms so tightly that your knuckles are white. Sean squeezes your kneecap, murmuring that everything will be okay and that you’re safe. You keep your eyes closed, trying to focus on the soothing sounds of his words.

Eventually the plane enters smooth skies and the seat belt sign is turned off. Despite this you remain keyed up, sitting stiffly as Shawn fades into a nap. 

"Excuse me, Miss?"

You crack open an eye to see a beautiful redheaded flight attendant bending down towards you with a glass of what appears to be whisky in her hand.  She extends it towards you and you take it confused.

"This is from the gentleman in A-1. He says to take this and you'll be relaxed for the rest of the flight." 

You look up a few rows to see Joel giving you a brief wave. You thank the women before raising it towards Joel in a Cheers motion. 

Drink it. Joel mouths. 

Yes, sir. You mouth back complete with a stiff fake salute before tossing back the drink. 

He grins at you before settling back in his seat. 

The drink does the job. 

"Here we are."

The cab drops the three of you in front of the beach resort. When you step out the air is fragrant with the scent of flowers. You wait while Joel checks you all in before he's back, motioning for you both to follow. 

There's the main section of the resort with luxurious hotel rooms. The more secluded section contains a variety of self contained houses that dot the waterfront. Its reserved for people who have unlimited credit card limits and drive cars that cost more than your parents first home.

When you arrive to your unit, your eyes are ready to bug out of your head. It's massive, as far as vacation rentals go. When you all step into the air conditioned unit you have to take a moment to take it all in. 

The beach house is beautiful with floor to ceiling windows, stunning tile floors and tasteful furniture. All of this is topped off with spectacular views of the beach outside your door. 

A plate of sliced pineapple and chilled wine sits on the kitchen table, along with a note that Joel reads when he wanders over. 

"Welcome note," he explains when he sees you looking at it. "I knew the owner back in trade school." 

You and Shawn nod, your boyfriends hand trailing down your back gently. It's much the same as what Joel did back at the airplane, but it feels different. You trail your suitcase behind you hearing the clack of it against the stone floor as you move around the room. 

"Wow." 

It's all you can utter as the three of you tour the rest of the unit. There’s a simple kitchen with an expensive looking coffee machine and a brand new bag of kona coffee waiting to be used.  The living room holds a table and four chairs, a few board games and a list of nearby places to visit along with the wifi code.  The couch is simple, placed in front of a large television that you’re sure you won’t use.

"My bedrooms on the right," Joel tells you both. "Yours it's on the left. We're sharin’ a bathroom, sorry about that. Pretty common in these places." 

Who cares about sharing a bathroom when you're in one of the most beautiful places you've ever been? Even the bathroom is beautiful with its high waterfall shower head and sleek marble. This place must have cost a fortune for the week. 

Joel encourages you both to take a look at your room down the hall and you don't hesitate to take Shawn's hand, dragging him there. Shawn pushes open the door to the bedroom and you can't hold in your shriek. 

"Holy shit! It's gorgeous!" 

The big windows overlook the ocean, the late afternoon beach beckoning to you. The bed is large and plush with white sheets, and framed prints of Oahu sunsets. Its spacious, the bed so large it looks like two giant beds pushed together. The closet is spacious and boats dozens of wood coat hangers.

“Wood, because it’s classy,” you tell Shawn in amusement who is already unpacking his suitcase while you continue to stare in a daze. 

"You like it?"

Joel is standing at the door frame, a shoulder balanced against it, watching you take it all in. He's smiling at you in that gentle, sweet way of his that makes you feel cared for. 

You're suddenly overcome with gratitude and you streak over to him. 

"Thank you, Joel!" You say, throwing your arms around his neck and hugging him. "This is the most beautiful place I've ever been."

Joel laughs along with Shawn at your embrace and enthusiasm, holding you around the middle and hoisting you in his arms. Your face presses into his neck as he squeezes you, and the scent of leather and sandalwood envelops you. 

You've never really hugged Joel before. Maybe a polite side hug during family events, a high-five during baseball games and even once a hard push to his shoulder when he made fun of you for being afraid of a spider that had gotten into the house. 

But you've never had your front pressed to his, never really felt the muscles of his back and arms, seen the tendons in his neck or realized just how big his hands are when they squeeze your waist before lowering you.  

"I guess that means you like it," he says, red-faced. You pull back, embarrassed at your overzealous response. 

Shawn and his dad are very similar in their looks. Except Shawn is clean-shaven while Joel has a beard and Shawn's eyes are hazel like his mom's while Joel's are the darkest brown you've ever seen. You've never really noticed how dark until this very moment. 

You shoot him a cheery thank you again before smiling and skipping over to Shawn announcing that you'll unpack as well. 

"You two enjoy, I gotta make a few calls but then we can head out to dinner."

"Sounds great," Shawn says as he searches for his phone charger. 

Joel closes the door behind him and you turn to your boyfriend. You can't explain it but you feel turned on. The Hawaiian air must be doing something to you because

You crawl towards where he kneels unpacking. You grin, feeling the pulse of desire hitting you below the navel. You kneel beside him, dropping your voice to a husky murmur. 

"Should we break the bed in?" 

An hour later the three of you are sitting at a local eatery. Joel and Shawn are talking with one another while you scan the busy restaurant. 

Couples, families, all laughing and cheerful. And why wouldn't they? This is Paradise after all. But you don't feel anything like it, if anything, you feel like a little black rain cloud. 

Shawn turned down your earlier advances, citing that he was too tired. The problem is for the past three months Shawn has been too tired most of the time. At first he blamed grad school but when you pointed out he still made lots of time for gaming with best friends Brian and Kevin he'd been quick to explain that gaming relaxed him. 

That conversation had gone over about as well as a turd in the punch bowl. You remember being so hurt at what you felt was a slight against you. Weren't you relaxing? Weren't you something that made him happy? 

So yeah, you had hoped that this little vacation might stir some of that old spark back. But maybe you were too eager. You had just arrived at the place after all. Maybe you were being unfair. Still, the rejection stung.

"Thought we could do all the tourist-y shit while we're here," Joel says after you've all placed your orders. "Luau, sunset cruise."

"Snorkelling?" Shawn offers. 

"Hell yes," Joel nods grinning. "ATV tour too."

The Millers like to have fun. They also like to keep busy. It's like second nature to them to be off on adventures or activities. You meanwhile plan on spending lots of time by the pool or the beach, reading and drinking. 

"What about you, darlin'?" Joel asks between sips of whisky. "What're you hopin' to do?"

You know exactly what. The thing you've been dying to do since you were a kid at the aquarium. 

"I wanna swim with the turtles."

Shawn bursts into amused laughter beside you, and if you weren't already irritated with him before, you certainly are now. He grins at you not understanding that you're secretly furious with him. 

"Turtles? Really?"

"What's wrong with turtles?"

"Seems kinda babyish doesn't it?"

"What's babyish about liking animals?" Joel cuts in. "You forgetting about the time we wouldn't let you in the petting zoo and you threw your shoe at me?"

"I was five, dad."

"Yeah well, some things don't change," Joel says with a smirk. "Still throwin' tantrums when you don't get your way."

"Fuck off old man," Shawn says through chuckles. “Don’t forget I’m your only child. I pick which retirement home I’m gonna stick you in when your mind goes.”

“Little bastard,” Joel mutters, trying to hold back a loud laugh.

He settles for tossing a drink umbrella in Shawn’s direction, chuckling when Shawn dodges it easily. You can't help but laugh along with him, your bad mood fading. 

By the time dessert arrives you're all several glasses of wine in reminiscing about Shawn's last attempt at surfing. 

"I've gotten better," he exclaims. “I swear.”

"Yeah well we'll see about that," Joel says paying the check. "Alright team, let's head back and get some shut eye. This old man needs it." 

You roll your eyes at that. Joel isn't even fifty and even if he was he's about the best looking man his age bracket and younger. You've seen the way women stare at him, whispering, blushing when he looks their way. He is not what you’d qualify as old.

The three of you arrive back at the unit to the sound of nighttime creatures croaking and buzzing. 

"Alright I'll meet you two out here tomorrow morning around nine. We can go to the excursion desk and plan the week. Sound good?"

"Sounds good, night Dad."

"Night Joel."

The three of you part ways into the opposite bedrooms. Shawn nuzzles your neck gently kissing there. He always does that when he's been drinking. You smile delightedly at this, eager to get into bed.

When the lights are off and the two of you have slipped off your clothes and under the covers you roll towards him, peppering his face with soft kisses. 

"It's late, babe," he murmurs, kissing you sweetly but with finality. 

"We're on vacation," you remind him, slipping your hand under his boxers.

You feel him slowly start to harden in your grip. You hear his breath hitch and you smile, knowing those sounds so intimately. You tug off your panties and slide onto his lap, preparing to ride him. 

"Fuck me," you whisper, hips grinding against his. "Wanna feel your cock in me."

“Baby, no.”

Shawn pulls you off of him and you tumble into the bed next to him, feeling your cheeks grow hot with humiliation.

"My dad is right across the hall," Shawn hisses. “I don’t want him hearing us.”

Rejection never sits well with you and immediately you feel yourself growing defensive. 

"You're dad is gonna be across the hall the whole week, Shawn,” you whisper angrily. “So what, we're not going to have fuck this entire trip?"

"We'll have sex," Shawn said rolling his eyes. "Just not when my dad is ten feet away sharing a fuckin' bathroom with us."

Bullshit. Another excuse to put off the intimacy that’s been dwindling for months. You push yourself from the bed, tugging on your dress from earlier. Shawn leans up on his elbows, giving you a look of concern.

"Where are you going?"

"A walk."

"I'll c---"

"No," you say sharp as a knife. "I want to go alone." 

You stalk out of the house, eyes glossy with hurt and anger. That's the thing they don't tell you about relationships that have gone on so long -- both partners need to work to keep the fires going. 

You make your way to the beach along the softly lit pathway. Its well after midnight and the resort is quiet; the lights dimmed or off entirely. You take a seat on a nearby rock, listening to the gentle sound of the evening waters lapping by the shore. You're very excited to go swimming tomorrow. To feel the warm sand underneath your feet. 

You can hear noise coming from the far end of the resort. You remember over dinner Joel going through the resort map on his phone, letting you know what amenities they had. He had told you both about the dance club the resort had.

Shawn had immediately laughed, stating that he’d take a pass on it.  Shawn hates dancing. You tried to get him to do dance lessons with you once but he wouldn't even give it a shot. 

Right now it seems all you can do is focus on Sean's flaws. You know that he's a decent man, you know the treats you well, but there are these bugaboos these irritants that can't help frustrate you right now. 

"Fuck it," you murmur to yourself, raising yourself from the sand and brushing it from your sundress. You follow the sound of the music, stopping in front of a door with blinking lights. A man in a blue Hawaiian shirt smiles at you when you approach. 

"Aloha, may I ask your Unit number?"

"Number 4, under Miller."

The man types into his computer before nodding, opening the door for you. You step into the darkness, letting your eyes adjust to the blue lights and colourful dance floor. The speakers are playing typical vacation music with a heavy bass.

Bodies writhe on the dance floor, half naked in revealing dresses or in the men's case, unbuttoned shirts. You order a drink at the bar, taking it with you as you scout the area for a free chair. A hand on your wrist surprises you.

"Joel?"

Joel is seated at one of the small circle tables nursing what appears to be a tumbler of Scotch. He motions for you to take the free chair next to him and you do gratefully falling into it, your arm bumping his. 

"What are you doin' here? Since when does Shawn dance?" He asks over the bass, grinning. He looks a bit tipsy, his neck red. 

"He doesn't, I'm here alone. I needed to blow off some steam," you tell him over the music. 

"Me too," he says loudly back. "Couldn't sleep. Too excited, I guess." 

You nod, looking back at the dance floor wistfully. Everyone looks like they're having such a fun time, their worries and concerns far away from them as they undulate to the rhythm of the music.  Joel takes another sip of his drink, watching you from the corner of his eyes. 

You wish Shawn was here with you, you wish he was spinning you around on the dance floor. You wish it was like those early years where you couldn’t keep your hands off of each other.

"You and Shawn doin' okay?"

Joel's voice cuts into your confusing thoughts. You glance his way.

"Why do you ask?"

"Cuz I'm a dad," Joel. "And I've been married. And I know what tension between two people looks like." 

You sigh heavily, your mind drifting to earlier. You don’t answer Joel because what would you tell him? You can’t tell your boyfriend’s dad that you’re worried his son is growing distant. You can’t tell him that your sex life has been disintegrating for the past several months. Instead you just shrug.

"You two talked about marriage?"

"What? No.”

You and Shawn have been together a long time, but you have no intention of settling down anytime soon. Sean is still doing his masters and you're loving your job at the museum.

"Good. No, not like that," Joel amends when he sees your stricken expression. "I just mean you're both so young."

"You were younger than us when you got married.”

"Yeah and look where that got me," he says with a scoff. 

"Yeah, well, I think it's just been a long time and we're hitting a rough patch. Nothing we can't overcome," you add quickly. "It's just hard sometimes, you know?"

"Yeah," Joel nods. "I know." 

The two of you lapse into silence, watching the twirling, shouting, laughing people swan around you. You shouldn’t be glum, you should be experiencing life!

"You wanna dance?"

His voice is low and husky in your ear. You start, surprised to see Joel inches from your face. You know he's speaking so close to you because it's so loud in here, but it doesn't stop your pulse from ticking at the shock. 

"Don't really know how.”

"Shit reason. C'mon."

Joel throws back the rest of his drink and drags you onto the dance floor. You laugh as he spins you, both of you almost knocking into an older couple who are taking the dance very seriously. They shoot you both a nasty look and you and Joel have to work hard to muffle your laughter. 

"You're gonna get us kicked out!"

"Nah," Joel shakes his head, spinning you again but closer to him. "I'm too charmin’."

"You think pretty highly of yourself don't you?"

Joel shrugs, laughing as the song ends. Another quick one begins and Joel looks serious. 

"I'm gonna teach you some moves Shawn's mom taught me."

"Okay."

You're surprised, he doesn't really mention Shawn's mother very often. 

You watch as Joel attempts to teach you some simple dance moves. You don't know if it's the stuffy club, the drinks running through your veins or the fact that you're dancing with your boyfriend's dad, but you can't really focus on the steps.

"I give up," you moan after the fifth failed attempt at a two-step. 

"You ain't a quitter," Joel assures you, trying to spin you slowly so you can get your footing. 

You never realized that Joel was such a good dancer. Watching him move his tall body is strangely hypnotizing, mainly because you never expected a man that broad and muscular to move so fluidly. 

"Atta girl," he says proudly when you get some of the footing correct. 

You smirk when you see the women nearby watching him, shooting him smiles. But his focus is on you, teaching you the moves and assuring you: it's alright darlin', we'll get you there just take your time. 

You're having so much fun with him you barely realize that an hour has gone by and you can only tell when you realize the back of your neck is damp with sweat. 

You're about to announce your heading back to the unit when the beat slows and many trickle off the dance floor. It's a slow song, and only the couples remain in the glowing dance floor. 

You go to step off when you feel Joel spin you again, back into his arms. You smile breathlessly up at him, the two of you shiny from perspiration from the dancing and the warm crowded space. 

Joel is looking at you strangely, his eyes luminous in the reflection of the twinkling club lights. When he slides a hand at your lower back and urges your hands around his neck you don't hesitate. You lace your fingers there, shifting from foot to foot.

You feel strange to be dancing with Joel. And not because he makes you feel uncomfortable, it's the opposite, actually. You feel almost too comfortable. Joel’s eyes are trailing over your face, sometimes highlighted by the flash of the DJ’s lights.

“You talked to Shawn about all that’s botherin’ you and this rough patch?” Joel asks out of nowhere.

He looks vulnerable; unlike the Joel you know who is all smiles and jokes.

“Kinda,” you say shyly, looking over his shoulder. “It’s just hard. . . We can both get pretty defensive. Plus, I wonder if I’m maybe being unfair. He’s in school and everything.”

“Uh huh, and you started that museum job didn’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“Pretty demanding job, ain’t it?”

“Yeah.”

Joel gives you a look as he rocks you both from side to side

“Can I say somethin’ you might not wanna hear?”

You nod.

“In my experience, it takes two people to make a relationship. Not one puttin’ in all the effort while the other one has his or her head in the sand.”  

You nod slowly, absorbing his words. The song ends and Joel releases his hands you’re your waist before he announces he has to hit the washroom. You head to the bar for a glass of water and to wait for him. 

"Hi beautiful." 

An Australian man around Joel's age with a moustache is leaning against the bar next to you. His eyes are bleary and red-rimmed, his cheeks ruddy. He’s obviously very drunk. You give a forced smile before going back to wait for your water.

"Can I get you a drink?"

"No thanks," you answer quickly. "Just getting water." 

"How about a dance then?"

"I'm good," you say forcing a polite smile. You’re facing away from him, eyes on the bartender hoping he notices you.  

"C'mon beautiful," the man insists, eyes sliding over your chest in a very obvious way. "I'm a good dancer too. Could give you lots of lessons." 

"She said no."

Joel's voice is there, having clearly come back from the bathroom. You step backwards and before you know it Joel is sliding his arm protectively around you.  You glance up to see Joel's face contorted into a mask of fury. His teeth are bared like some wild animal and he grips you tightly to him. 

"Sorry man," The guy says holding his hands up in surrender towards Joel. "Didn't know she was taken." 

Joel sneers before leading you out of the club. The cool air is a welcome reprieve when you step outside, breathing deeply. 

"That place is nothin' but perverts," Joel growls as the two of you make your way back along the beach in the direction of your unit. 

"Joel,  you were there," you say giggling. "That make you a pervert?"

"Ha ha."

You walk quietly along the shoreline, confused as to how you can feel this good when just an hour ago it felt like everything was falling apart. Maybe it’s the drink in your veins, maybe its Hawaii, or maybe it’s just Joel.

"Watch it--"

Joel takes your hand when you stumble over a rock in the semi darkness. You let him, not dropping it even when your walking evens out. It feels nice to walk hand in hand with him, it feels safe. He doesn't let go of your hand either as you continue along, your shoes making dual footprints in the sand. 

"Thanks for in there," you say. “I hate creepy guys like that.”

"Was nothin'," he says, then he drops your hand after a moment. "Shawn would have done the same."

"No, he wouldn't have." 

It slips out before you can stop yourself. Joel stops in the sand, his concern there in his face. It’s clear that what you’ve said has upset him.

"What?"

"He doesn't like confrontation, you know that," you say with a shrug. "And I like that about him."

"You do?" Joel challenges. "Really?" 

"Sometimes." 

Honestly you’ve never enjoyed the men who start fights for no reason, who act like cavemen when someone looks at their girlfriend. Shawn is too smart for that, too above it to engage with assholes like that. But you have to admit that there was a part of you that found Joel’s actions inside the club to be a bit attractive. Is that the word? Would you really call your boyfriend’s father attractive?

You look at him standing there, his grey t-shirt clinging to his muscles and wide shoulders, the muscular thighs in denim and you think, fuck, yeah he is attractive. You knew he wasn’t ugly, you’d just never looked at him like that. Like he was a man outside of being Shawn’s dad.

"I come from a time when you take care of what's yours." Joel runs a hand through his messy curls. "If you were mine I wouldn't let anyone talk to you the way that man did, let alone touch you." 

If you were mine. 

You can't understand why but you're nipples tighten under your dress at those words. The possessiveness in Joel's voice is so dark and husky. He’s looking off into the dark like he’s really upset.

"If I was yours," you murmur. 

His glazed eyes move from the beach over to your face. You’re standing so close to one another and you can see his chest rising and falling quickly as he breathes. His scotch-coated breath huffs over your cheeks and you swear you’re getting drunker just inhaling it.

You must be, because why else would you be putting your hands on his shoulders. Why else would you be pressing your mouth to his? Why else would you be tracing his plush lips with your tongue and whimpering when he groans into your parted mouth?

And he must be drunk because he doesn’t pull away or hesitate. He dips his head and his hands wrap around your waist, bringing your body against him tightly. His palms slide over your skin, desperate to touch you everywhere as he tilts his head, deepening the kiss. You welcome it, going gooey in his arms, allowing him to take what he wants from you.   

He’s so fucking broad, so strong, so masculine. You gasp into his mouth when he grips your ass with his big hands, pulling your hips against his, circling them as he kisses you. You feel his hardened cock through the layers of fabric, straining against the zipper of his jeans, desperate to bury itself in your slick heat.

To be desired like this feels powerful. It feels like years since Shawn wanted you like this much. It makes you lean more into Joel, desperate to keep the sensation going. His hands are sliding under your dress, up your silken thigh and you tremble.

A splash sounds nearby in the water, a fish or something startling you both and you simultaneously break apart. You both take a step back from one another in the sand, eyes wide. Joel looks completely crazed.

“The fuck—what are we doin’?” Joel whispers, the regret clear in both your faces.

You bring your trembling hands to your warm cheeks and tears immediately spring to your waterline.

What have you just done?

“Oh my fuck, no no, I don’t – I don’t know why-“

You bend at the waist, hands braced on your knees as you start to hyperventilate. Joel is pacing up and down the sand, his silhouette barely seen in the darkness of night. You can see his feet pacing back and forth. . . back and forth . . . He stops when you let out a hiccup, on the verge of throwing up.

“Honey stop,” Joel says, a hand on your back, rubbing gently along your spine. “Calm down. Calm down, its okay.”

“I don’t know why I did that,” you say, tears streaming down your face and dropping into the sand below. “What the fuck is wrong with me?”

“S’not your fault,” Joel says, his voice even and calm. It makes you feel calm. And yet, guilt still bubbles up in your lungs, making a small sob escape.

 “I have to—you need to—I need to tell Shawn. Right now.”

“Hold on,” Joel says roughly, gripping you by the shoulder and urging you to stand. He peers into your face with a grim expression.

“You cannot tell Shawn anythin’.”

“I have to,” you whine.

“It’ll just hurt him,” Joel insists, nodding and hoping you’ll do the same. “It was a mistake. It was nothing, it was just the booze. We just drank too much and we were all hopped up on that asshole inside the club and we weren’t thinkin’.”

“Right,” you agree, relief sliding through every vein you possess as he lays it out for you. “That’s totally what it was. The drinking. We’re drunk.”

“Completely.”

“Okay. Good.”

You’re still shaken up by what just happened, still tipsy from the drinks. Joel runs an anxious hand through his curls, looking utterly wrecked.

“Let’s go back.”

The two of you walk the rest of the way back in silence. You still cannot believe what you did. You kissed your boyfriend’s father. You kissed him and he kissed you back. Fuck, you both must be utterly wasted. Maybe if you’re lucky you’ll both forget it even happened. You would welcome the hangover from hell if it could erase the last fifteen minutes from both your minds for good.

Joel tugs open the sliding glass door, not able to look at you as you both pad towards the opposing doors. You glance over your shoulder to see Joel staring at you as you enter the bedroom where his son sleeps. You give him a sorrowful smile before closing the door.

You crawl under the covers, thankful that Shawn is asleep. You slip off the dress, your hair wild from dancing, your skin sticky with sweat, and your mouth still tasting of scotch. Your cunt flutters at the memory of the noises he made.

You roll onto your side, trying to drift to sleep. Shawn, still half-slumbering snuggles up against your back. His arm slips over your waist and he holds you, as he often holds you back home, gentle and tender and full of love.

“I’m sorry about before, babe,” he murmurs into your hair.

You feel tears burning the back of your eyes. You blink rapidly, closing your eyes and trying to swallow the guilt.

You know that Joel is in his bed right now similarly afflicted, thinking about how he did something so unforgivable and to his own son. Joel is the kindest dad you know; he loves his son more than anything. You know that what you both just did was awful and disgusting.

You also know that there is something deeply wrong with you because as you lay there in Shawn’s arms your pussy floods with memories of his father’s mouth on yours still vivid in your mind.  

do you guys want more of this? or should it be a one-shot? also trying a new aesthetic what do we tthink?

[pucksandpower]

Thwack

Charles Leclerc x pregnant!Reader

Summary: pregnancy hormones tend to make you a bit emotional … as your husband’s team principal learns firsthand

The scorching July sun beats down on the Hungaroring as you waddle through the paddock, your swollen belly leading the way. The disappointment of Charles’ P6 qualifying result hangs heavy in the air, mingling with your hormones to create a potent cocktail of frustration.

“I can’t believe this,” you mutter, adjusting your sunglasses. “P6? After everything he’s been through?”

Your eyes lock onto a familiar figure — Fred Vasseur, engrossed in conversation with a group of engineers. Without thinking, you march toward him, your designer purse swinging at your side.

“Fred!” You call out, your voice sharp enough to cut through the buzz of the paddock.

The Ferrari team principal turns, his eyebrows rising as he takes in your approaching form. “Ah, Y/N, how are you feeling today?”

“How am I feeling?” You repeat, incredulous. “How do you think I’m feeling? My husband just qualified P6 after weeks of being your guinea pig!”

Fred holds up his hands placatingly. “Now, Y/N, let’s not overreact. We’re all working towards the same goal here.”

“Overreact?” Your voice rises an octave. “You want to see overreacting?”

Without warning, you swing your purse, connecting solidly with Fred’s arm.

“Ow! What the-” Fred stumbles back, shock written across his face.

“That’s for Canada!” Another swing. “And that’s for Spain!” Thwack. “Austria!” Thwack. “Britain!”

Fred dances away, trying to put distance between himself and your surprisingly effective weapon. “Y/N, please, let’s talk about this rationally!”

“Rationally?” You seethe. “You want rational? How about explaining why you’ve been sacrificing my husband’s performance for weeks and then blaming him for it?”

A crowd begins to gather, murmurs of surprise and amusement rippling through the onlookers.

“It’s not that simple,” Fred protests, ducking another swing. “We needed data for the upgrades. Charles understood-”

“Charles is too nice for his own good!” You interrupt. “He’d drive a cardboard box if you told him it would help the team!”

A familiar voice cuts through the commotion. “Mon amour? What’s going on?”

You turn to see Charles jogging towards you, concern etched on his face. His race suit is unzipped to the waist, revealing his sweat-soaked fireproofs underneath.

“I’m teaching Fred a lesson in loyalty,” you declare, brandishing your purse menacingly.

Charles’ eyes widen as he takes in the scene. “With your purse?”

“It’s Hermès,” you say, as if that explains everything.

Charles can’t help but chuckle, despite the situation. “Okay, mon cœur, maybe we should take a step back and-”

“Don’t you ‘mon cœur’ me, Charles Leclerc!” You warn, turning your ire on him. “This is partly your fault too!”

Charles blinks, taken aback. “My fault? What did I do?”

“You let them walk all over you!” You exclaim, gesticulating wildly. “Always saying yes, always being the good guy. Sometimes you need to stand up for yourself!”

Charles approaches cautiously, as if you’re a wild animal he’s trying not to spook. “I understand you’re upset, Y/N, but-”

“Upset doesn’t begin to cover it,” you interject. “I’m furious, I’m disappointed, I’m ... I’m ...” Suddenly, your lower lip trembles, and to your horror, you feel tears welling up in your eyes.

Charles’ expression softens immediately. He closes the distance between you, wrapping his arms around you as best he can with your pregnant belly between you.

“Shh, it’s okay,” he murmurs, stroking your hair. “I know it’s been a tough few weeks.”

You bury your face in his chest, your anger giving way to exhaustion and hormonal tears. “It’s not fair,” you hiccup. “You work so hard, and they just ...”

“I know, I know,” Charles soothes. He looks over your head at Fred, who’s watching the scene with a mixture of confusion and concern. “Perhaps we should continue this conversation somewhere more private?”

Fred nods gratefully. “Yes, that might be best. My office?”

Charles guides you gently towards the Ferrari motorhome, keeping a protective arm around you. As you walk, you can’t help but notice the stares and whispers from the paddock personnel.

“Great,” you groan. “Now I’m going to be all over social media as the crazy pregnant lady who attacked the Ferrari team principal.”

Charles chuckles softly. “Well, at least they can’t say our life is boring, eh?”

Despite yourself, you crack a small smile. “I suppose not.”

Once inside Fred’s office, you sink into a comfortable chair, suddenly feeling the weight of your actions. Charles perches on the arm of your chair, his hand resting supportively on your shoulder.

Fred takes a seat behind his desk, rubbing his arm where your purse made contact. “So,” he begins cautiously, “I think we have some things to discuss.”

You take a deep breath, trying to collect your thoughts. “I’m sorry for hitting you,” you say finally. “That was ... not my finest moment.”

Fred waves a hand dismissively. “No permanent damage done. Though I must say, you have quite an arm on you.”

“She’s been practicing her swing,” Charles quips. “Says it’s for protecting the baby.”

You elbow him gently, but can’t suppress a small laugh.

Fred leans forward, his expression serious. “I want you both to know that we value Charles immensely. These past few races have been challenging, yes, but it’s all part of a larger strategy.”

“A strategy that’s left Charles floundering in the midfield,” you point out, your frustration bubbling up again.

Charles squeezes your shoulder gently. “Y/N’s right, Fred. I understand the need for data, but at what cost? We’re falling behind in the championship.”

Fred sighs, running a hand through his hair. “I know, and believe me, it’s not a decision we’ve made lightly. But the data we’ve gathered is crucial for our upcoming upgrades. We’re playing the long game here.”

“And in the meantime?” You press. “Charles takes all the heat from the media and fans?”

“That’s not fair,” Charles interjects softly. “The team has been supportive.”

You turn to look at him incredulously. “Supportive? Charles, they practically threw you under the bus after Silverstone!”

Charles winces at the memory. “It was a misunderstanding. They didn’t mean-”

“Stop making excuses for them!” You exclaim, your hormones sending your emotions on another rollercoaster. “You deserve better than this!”

Fred clears his throat, drawing your attention back to him. “You’re right, Y/N. We haven’t been as ... transparent as we could have been. Charles, I apologize for how things were handled after the British Grand Prix. It won’t happen again.”

Charles nods, a small smile tugging at his lips. “I appreciate that.”

“And what about going forward?” You press, not quite ready to let the matter drop. “Are we done with the guinea pig phase?”

Fred leans back in his chair, a thoughtful expression on his face. “The major data collection is complete. From here on out, we’re focused on implementation and fine-tuning. Charles, you’ll have the full support of the team to maximize your performance.”

You feel some of the tension leave your body at these words. Charles, sensing your relaxation, gently massages your shoulder.

“That’s all we wanted to hear,” Charles says softly. “Thank you.”

Fred stands, coming around his desk to stand in front of you both. “I want you to know that we believe in Charles. He’s the future of this team, and we’re committed to giving him the car he deserves.”

You nod, feeling a lump form in your throat. Damn hormones. “I’m sorry again for the ... purse incident,” you manage.

Fred chuckles. “Let’s just say it was a uniquely passionate expression of team spirit, shall we?”

As you struggle to your feet (no small feat at eight months pregnant), Fred extends his hand to Charles. “We’re going to turn this around, starting tomorrow. P6 isn’t where we belong.”

Charles shakes his hand firmly. “Agreed. I’ll give it everything I’ve got.”

“You always do,” you murmur, leaning into Charles’ side.

As you make your way out of the office, Charles keeps a supportive arm around you. “Feeling better?” He asks softly.

You nod, a mix of emotions swirling inside you. “I’m sorry for causing a scene. I just ... I hate seeing you struggle when I know how talented you are.”

Charles presses a kiss to your temple. “I know, mon amour. But remember, we’re in this together. The good days and the bad.”

You stop walking, turning to face him fully. “Promise me something?”

“Anything,” Charles says without hesitation.

“Don’t let them take advantage of your kindness,” you say seriously. “You’re allowed to stand up for yourself, to demand what you deserve.”

Charles’ eyes soften as he gazes at you. “I promise. And thank you for always being in my corner. Even if your methods are a bit ... unorthodox.”

You can’t help but laugh. “Hey, desperate times call for desperate measures. And let’s be honest, my purse probably got the message across better than any words could have.”

Charles grins, pulling you close. “Remind me never to get on your bad side. I’d hate to face the wrath of the Birkin.”

As you both dissolve into laughter, you feel a weight lift off your shoulders. Tomorrow is another day, another race, another chance. And with Charles by your side, you’re ready to face whatever challenges come your way — purse in hand, just in case.

[theambitiouswoman]

Questions To Ask Yourself If You Want To Become The Best Version of Yourself

What do I really care about? What things are really important to me?

What am I good at, and where do I need help? What am I strong in, and what could I get better at?

What do I want to achieve soon and later? What things do I want to do soon, and what are my bigger, long-term goals?

Am I trying new things and not just staying comfy? Am I doing things that might be a bit scary but good for me?

How do I deal with problems and when things go wrong? What do I do when stuff doesn't work out?

Am I nice to myself when things don't go well? Do I treat myself kindly, especially when things are tough?

How do I use my time, and what's most important? How do I plan my day, and what things matter the most?

Am I learning new stuff regularly? Do I keep finding out new things?

Do I have a good balance between work and fun? Do I make sure to have enough time for work and for things I enjoy?

Do I have good friendships and avoid bad ones? Am I friends with people who make me feel good?

Do I take care of my body? Am I eating well, exercising, and sleeping enough?

Do I think about my feelings and thoughts? Do I pay attention to how I'm feeling and what I'm thinking?

How do I deal with stress and make myself calm? What do I do when I'm stressed out?

Do I help others and make the world better? Do I do things to make people's lives nicer?

Do I have good habits and get rid of bad ones? Are there things I do every day that are good for me? Are there things I should stop doing?

Do I learn from what people say about me? When people give me advice, do I listen and try to get better?

Do I say no when I need to? Do I tell people when I need space or when something isn't okay for me?

What makes me really happy? What do I like to do that makes me feel great?

Do I use money wisely? Am I good at saving and spending money in smart ways?

Do I believe I can improve and get better? When things are tough, do I think I can get through them and learn something?Am I being kind to others and making them feel good? Do I treat people nicely and make them happy?

Do I learn from things I do wrong? When I make a mistake, do I figure out how to do better next time?

Do I try new things, even if they scare me a little? Do I give things a shot, even if they seem a bit scary?

Am I spending time with people who care about me? Do I hang out with folks who like me for who I am?

Do I eat healthy foods and move my body? Am I eating good stuff and getting some exercise?

Am I sharing and helping others when I can? Do I give stuff to others and lend a hand when I'm able to?

Am I paying attention when people talk to me? Do I really listen when others are speaking to me?

Do I take breaks and do things I enjoy? Do I give myself time to rest and do things I like?

Do I say sorry and make up if I hurt someone? When I make someone feel bad, do I apologize and try to make things better?

Do I imagine good things for myself in the future? Do I think about cool stuff I want to do?

Do I stop and relax when I'm feeling stressed? When I'm worried, do I take a moment to calm down?

Do I ask for help when I need it? Do I tell someone when I can't do something on my own?

Do I try my best, even when things are tricky? Even if it's hard, do I give it my all?

Do I pick up after myself and keep things tidy? Am I good at cleaning up and keeping things in order?

Do I use my time for things that matter most? Do I do important stuff before other things?

Do I think about good things that happened today? Do I remember all the nice things that occurred?

Am I okay with making mistakes and learning from them? Do I know it's okay to mess up sometimes and learn from it?

Do I show appreciation for the people around me? Do I let others know I'm thankful for them?

Do I take deep breaths and relax when I'm upset? When I'm mad, do I breathe and try to calm down?

Do I believe I can do better and keep growing? Do I think I can get better at things and keep getting smarter?

Am I happy with who I am right now? Do I like myself just as I am?

Do I feel okay when things don't go as planned? When stuff doesn't work out, do I stay calm?

Do I think about good things about myself? Do I focus on the nice parts of me?

Do I let go of things that make me sad? When something makes me upset, can I move on from it?

Do I notice when I'm feeling worried or scared? Am I aware of when I'm feeling nervous or frightened?

Do I believe I can do things even if they're tough? Can I do hard things if I try?

Do I try to make my mind peaceful? Do I relax my thoughts when they're racing?

Do I find things that make me feel relaxed? What can I do to feel calm and at ease?

Am I patient when things take time? Can I wait without getting upset?

Do I talk kindly to myself in my head? Do I say nice things to myself in my mind?

Am I curious about things and want to learn? Do I like to find out new stuff?

Do I think about good times and happy memories? Do I remember fun things that happened before?

Do I try to understand how others feel? Can I tell what others are feeling?

Do I imagine nice things happening in the future? Can I think about good stuff that might come?

Do I take time to rest and be by myself? Do I give myself breaks and quiet time?

Do I let go of things I can't change? Can I forget about things I can't do anything about?

Do I believe I can do things even if I don't know how yet? Do I think I can learn new things?

Do I tell myself I'm doing a good job? Do I give myself a pat on the back?

Do I stay calm even if things are really busy? Can I be relaxed even when things are crazy?

Do I know that I can make mistakes and it's okay? Do I understand that everyone messes up sometimes?

[sweetiecutie]

AHHHH I NEED MORE KEEGAN IN MY LIFE PLEASE could you write some Keegan h/c?

Pairing: Keegan P Russ x fem! Reader

Warnings: just general stuff, language, bad driving, NSFW under the cut, mdni, spit kink

A/n: it’s not a lot, but it’s better than nothing😌 Keegan is such a bad bitch, he deserves more attention

• Starting off - I’m pretty sure that Keegan would want a civil partner; someone not related to military and actually as far as possible from all the war stuff. First of all, it’s to avoid having constant fear of losing you on the battlefield - it’s a highly dangerous job, sometimes coming out alive is not only a matter of skills, but also pure luck. Secondly, the amount of trauma and emotional damage Keegan carries is more than enough for two people - he needs someone grounded and, well, more stable, someone who will be able to give him a piece of blissful domestic life, faraway from all the constant war Keegan lives in.

• Always referring to you as his girl in conversations with other people or when introducing you to someone new. “That’s Y/n - my girl” “That’s for my girl, she likes pink” “My girl doesn’t like the smell of smoke so I’m trying to quit”. It’s also a way of showing everyone that you’re his - letting others know from the very beginning that you’re taken and no one better try anything with his precious girl, otherwise a few bones will be broken.

• Gives off annoying older brother vibes. He’ll always playfully nag you, and it’ll only become worse once you start dating. Placing stuff on the highest shelves just to watch you struggle to get it yourself, drawing some silly doodles on your notes, messing with your makeup that you spent nearly an hour organising neatly, punching your favourite plushie just to get a rise out of you. And of course, constant bickering! “Keegan, can you pass me that book?” - “Fuck no” *passes the book*. “Keegan, I want some sushi” - “Well shit, what am I supposed to do about that?” *already placing an order online on his phone*

• Another amazing driver here. Keegan has horrible road rage, hitting the car horn aggressively, yelling most intricate insults out the window at whoever that happened to piss him off. I also have a feeling the he drives really fast and reckless, teasing you whenever you ask him to go slower - so you better always buckle up. And yes, he definitely got in a few minor accidents - scratching or leaving indents on other car’s bumper.

NSFW here~*•.

• And while we’re speaking of driving - just imagine giving him a sloppy noisy head while being stuck in a long traffic. Keegan is seething with hot anger, rolling his eyes on other drivers, lack of nicotine adding to his distress. And here’s a sweet lovely you trying your best to make Keegan feel at least a tad bit better, soothing his booming annoyance with your silky tongue swirling around throbbing shaft, cheeks hollowing to provide stronger suction, allowing Keegan to set the pace. And it seemed to work wonders on him - his nape against the headrest of driver’s seat, pretty blue eyes half lidded, staring at the car ceiling, adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows hard, feeling your throat wrapped around his cock.

• Oh, how nasty he is. Biggest spit kink ever - ordering to open your mouth nice and wide just to spit a thick globe of saliva in it, then closing your jaw and making sure that you swallow it. Will gladly let you spit in his mouth as well; loooves messy wet kisses - either during make out session or after you gave him head, slurping up your spit mixed with his cum from your lips and chin. Very often uses his spit as lube, or telling you to spit in his palm before spreading it all over his needy leaking cock, plunging it deep inside your warmth.

• A horndog. You never have to ask him if he’s in a right mood because yes, he is. He is always in the mood to fuck. Now, he always lets you know that it’s totally fine if you say no - Keegan will never pressure or guilt trap you into any kind of intimacy, no means no. You can always cuddle up together or do something fun like cooking, dancing or simply dorking around. But if your sexdrive happens to match his - oh boy, I’m sorry for your neighbours. Let’s just say - there’s hardly any surface in your flat that you didn’t fuck on.

• It’s nothing new, but this mug is cocky. Like, I don’t think he has unimaginably big dick - not small for sure, but not huge as well; but the way he works with it - a chef’s kiss. Keegan just knows how to angle his hips to massage that one spot within you, how you like your clit to be played with, how he quickly discovers and memorises all the sweetest spots of your body. “Aw, cumming already? I barely touched you, does it feel this good?” - he’d purr, curling three of his long fingers inside of your needy cunny, thumb flicking swollen clit while hot mouth sucks on perked up nipples.

• Daddy kink? Daddy kink😏

Likes, reblogs and comments are highly appreciated! Feedback is very important, give writers some love<3

[bangchansdirty-slut]

hi, can i request giselle x g!p reader?

Sleepover

•───⋅⋆⁺‧₊☽⛦☾₊‧⁺⋆⋅───•

Paring: Top!Giselle x Bttm!Virgin!Girl!P!Reader

Genre: Smut

Summary: During a sleepover with Giselle, you and she started playing truth or dare, and things took a turn.

More: Masterlist

A/n: I just returned from a three-day overnight extracurricular activity that I had been preparing for over the past few weeks, I also got sick after it. Due to this, I was unable to post. Also, I am accepting requests.

•───⋅⋆⁺‧₊☽⛦☾₊‧⁺⋆⋅───•

You and Aeri, from the kpop group Aespa, have been best friends since you were young. Tonight, you're at her place having a sleepover, just like the old days. You're sitting on the couch, playing truth or dare, when it's Aeri's turn to choose. She looks at you with a mischievous grin and says, "Truth or dare?" You reply with a nervous laugh, "Truth." Aeri tilts her head, considering her options, before asking, "When was the last time you had sex with someone?"

Your heart starts racing as you think about how to answer. You're a virgin, and you don't want Aeri to know that. You stutter for a moment before finally saying, "Um…well, I've never…done that before." There's a moment of silence as Aeri processes your response, her expression slowly changing from amusement to surprise.

"Really? You've never had sex with someone before?" she asks, sounding genuinely shocked. You nod, feeling your cheeks flush even more. "But…you're so pretty and sexy, and you have such a nice body. I thought…" She trails off, looking confused.

You feel a mixture of embarrassment and relief wash over you. You were worried that Aeri would be disappointed in you, but it seems like she's just surprised. "Well, I've never really been interested in guys or anything," you say, explaining your lack of experience. "I mean, I like girls. But…I've never had the chance to…"

Aeri looks at you intently, her gaze unwavering. "Hmm…that's kind of hot," she says with a grin. "I never thought of it that way before. You know, Y/n, you're my best friend, and I care about you a lot. I just want what's best for you. If you're not ready for a guy, then maybe…you should try it with a girl?"

Her words take you by surprise, and a blush creeps up your neck. You've always been curious about girls, but never had the courage to act on those feelings. Aeri's comment makes you feel a mixture of excitement and nervousness. "I-I don't know…," you stammer. "What if it's weird between us afterward?"

Aeri gives you a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. "We'd still be best friends, wouldn't we?" she asks with a grin. "And hey, if it feels good, why not try it? I mean, it's not like we're strangers. We know each other better than anyone. And if it doesn't work out, we can always go back to being just friends."

Her words make sense to you, and the thought of exploring your feelings for her is becoming more and more appealing. You look into her eyes, seeing the genuine concern and care she has for you. "Okay," you say, taking a deep breath.

Aeri grins and leans in closer, her chest brushing against your own as she whispers in your ear, "Are you sure you're ready for this, Y/n? You know, I can be pretty overwhelming sometimes." She lets her hand slip down between your legs, teasing your already hard girl cock.

You shiver and arch your back into her touch. "I-I am," you manage to say, your voice shaky with desire. "I want this. With you."

Aeri gets off the couch, kneeling in front of you once more, and strips her clothes off before stripping off your clothes. Your hard girl cock springs free, already half-hard at the thought of being with her. She looks at you intently, her eyes boring into yours, and smirks. "Y/nnie, why are you looking away? Isn't this what you fantasize about when you're alone? Isn't that right, to jerk yourself off to? Me, my pretty tits, and my tight, aching pussy?" Her words send a shiver down your spine, and she leans forward, pressing her breasts against your cock.

With a playful growl, Aeri starts tit fucking you, moving her chest up and down, sliding your girl cock between her soft mounds. It feels incredible, and you can feel your cock hardening with each thrust. She looks up at you, her eyes dark and intense, and opens her mouth to speak again. "Fuck… Isn't this what you want?" she asks, her voice rough with desire. "To feel me like this?"

Your hips begin to move on their own, meeting her thrusts, and you let out a moan as pleasure washes over you. "Aeri…" you manage to say between gasps for air.

She looks up at you, her eyes dark and intense, and smirks. "You like that?" She asks, then leans forward, taking your girl cock into her mouth. Her tongue swirls around the sensitive head, and you arch your back off the couch, crying out as you feel her expertise.

Aeri sucks on your girl cock, her mouth hot and wet, and your hips begin to move of their own accord, meeting her thrusts. She lets out a moan around you, and your orgasm builds, coiling in your stomach as she expertly brings you to the brink. Her breasts are soft and warm against your cock, and as you feel your climax approaching, she removes her mouth and she squeezes her titd together, milking you until your release is imminent. Your cum spurts out over her tits, coating her pink nipples and trailing down her cleavage. She moans, arching her back as your seed spills across her chest, and when she finally catches her breath, she looks up at you with a satisfied smile.

"Was that what you needed?" she asks breathlessly as she straddles your lap. You nod, your own breath coming in ragged gasps as you try to catch your breath. She leans forward, pressing her wet, cum-covered breasts against your face. "Then clean them off," she commands, arching her back.

You take her nipple into your mouth, savoring the taste of her skin and your saltyish cum. Her nipples are hard and erect beneath your tongue, and you suck on it hungrily, relishing the feel of her flesh against your lips. You move to her other breast, licking a trail of cum from her areola to her nipple, then taking it between your teeth and gently biting down.

She gasps, arching her back, and her hips move faster, slamming down onto your cock. Her wetness surrounds you, and you feel the heat of her body, her skin pressed against yours. The sensation is almost overwhelming, and you find yourself losing control, your hips bucking wildly as you try to match her pace.

"Yes, like that!" she cries out, her nails digging into your shoulders. "You feel so good!"

Her movements grow more frenzied, her breath coming in ragged gasps as she leans forward, burying her face in your neck. Her tongue darts out, tracing circles around your earlobe as her hips piston up and down, taking you deeper inside her with each thrust. You can feel the tightness of her muscles, the way she's holding back her orgasm, waiting for you to give her permission.

"Cum with me," she whispers hoarsely. "Lets do it together." Her words send a thrill through you, and as her hips continue to move, you feel your orgasm building again. The sensation of her body moving against yours, the heat of her skin, the wetness of her pussy - it's all too much. Your hips buck violently, thrusting up into her, as you feel your release building, growing, ready to spill over the edge.

She looks down at you with a mixture of desire and love, her eyes glazed over, and as your orgasm crests, you both moan in unison. Your cum spurts free, coating her inner thighs, and she cries out, her body tensing, her muscles clenching around you as she comes as well. Her climax is intense, her body shuddering with the force of it, and you feel her walls squeezing you tightly, milking every last drop of your release.

Her orgasm subsides, leaving her gasping for breath, her chest heaving. She leans into you, resting her head on your shoulder, and you can feel the warmth of her body against yours. Her hair falls across your arm, tickling your skin. She sighs contentedly, and you wrap your arm around her, holding her close.

"You're amazing," you tell her, your voice quiet and full of awe. "I mean, I've never experienced anything like that before." You can feel the weight of your words, the sincerity behind them, and it makes her heart swell with happiness.

She looks up at you, her green eyes shining with pride and love. "I'm glad I could give that to you. It's what "friends" are for, right?" She smiles, a genuine, beautiful smile that takes years off her age.

You can't help but return the smile, feeling the warmth spread through your body. "Yeah, I guess you're right," you say, still a little flustered. "I mean, you're really something else, you know that?"

She laughs, her breath tickling your neck. "Oh, you're not so bad yourself. Now, come on, let's take a shower together maybe even a second round while we're in there." Her voice is playful, and she gives your arm a little squeeze before she lets it go.

[lemoncrushh]

Happy Place

Summary: While staying at a cabin with friends, Harry comforts you when you're feeling down.

Warnings: none really, but see note below.

Word Count: 1331

A/N: From my 2016 collection. I believe this was a request from a follower who was having a hard time at home. This is meant to make you feel better if you're low. No specifics are given about y/n's family life, but I wanted to mention in case it's a trigger for you.

You weren't sure why you'd agreed to go on this trip. The cabin was nice, your friends were nice but...to say you were having a good time would be a stretch. It wasn't like you wanted to go home, though. At this point you weren't really sure if you had much of a home to go to.

When everyone else decided to play a game, you snuck off by yourself to the little deck out back. The sun hadn't quite set yet and it was a little chilly, so you grabbed your hoodie and a blanket, wrapping it around your shoulders. You sat in solitude, watching the sky change from orange to purple. The brisk night air filled your lungs as you took shaky breaths, trying your best not to cry.

"What are you doing out here?" you suddenly heard behind you. You hadn't even heard the door open. You remained silent, however, and didn't bother to turn your head.

"Okayyyy..." he said, stepping closer to you. "Something wrong?"

You shook your head, finally acknowledging him. You sniffed, pulling the sleeves of your hoodie over your hands.

Harry sat next to you on the step. You could feel his eyes on you, but still you focused on the sunset and the pine trees. You heard him take a deep breath.

"Nice out here," he stated.

"Yeah," you muttered.

"Good place to think," he added.

You nodded. Harry always had been kind to you. Out of all the people that had come on this trip, even your best friend, you were most glad that he had come. You hated being rude to him, and you hoped you weren't. You just needed to be alone.

"Sometimes when I'm not feeling that great, I like to watch the sunset," he commented. "The way the sky changes colors is so amazing. Until eventually it's pitch black, and the stars come out. And it reminds me how small I am."

Something about Harry's words made you choke and brought tears to your eyes. You quickly wiped them away with your arm.

"Problems at home?" you heard him ask, making you jump.

Trying to hold back a sob, you nodded your head. For the first time, you turned to look at him. The kindness in his eyes was undeniable. It was as though he could see right through to your soul. His forearms rested on his knees as he waited for you to speak. But you just couldn't.

"Wanna talk about it?" he asked, seeming to read your mind. "Sometimes it helps."

Swallowing back tears, you shook your head again, lowering your gaze to your lap. You wrapped the blanket tighter around you, feeling a sudden chill.

"That's okay," Harry sighed. "You don't have to. We can just sit here."

You blinked at the word "we". Pulling your knees up to your chest, you looked out at the trees again. You half expected Harry to try to coerce you into talking, but after a few minutes when he hadn't, you shifted your eyes to look at him. His profile was lovely as the night wind whipped through his hair. You smiled to yourself in spite of the internal agony you were experiencing.

"Thanks," you muttered, causing him to turn his head and return your smile.

"You're welcome," he replied.

You and Harry sat together in silence until the sun had completely set. Just as he'd remarked, the stars had come out. You began to count them in your head. Your lips must have been moving however, because Harry seemed to catch on.

"Don't count that one," he pointed. "That's Venus."

"How do you know?" you asked, although you knew it was as well.

Harry shrugged. "Just do."

You hadn't meant to stare at him. But watching him look up at the sky was mesmerizing. When he caught you looking at him out of the corner of his eye, he gave a smirk, making you quickly look down at your lap. You saw him shift slightly next to you, rubbing his hands together, and suddenly you felt like a jerk. He merely had a shirt on, and here you were with a jacket and a fleece blanket.

"Here," you said, holding out one end of the blanket.

Harry glared at you in question.

"Get under," you offered. "It's getting cold."

Giving you his hundred watt smile again, he scooted closer to you, pulling the blanket over his shoulder. Your arms touched under the blanket, sending more shivers throughout your body than you had without him there. When his hand found yours, however, and he threaded his fingers through, you felt a sudden calmness. You didn't bother to look at him, but instead continued to look up where the tops of the trees kissed the sky in tranquility.

"Do you have a happy place?" you heard Harry inquire.

"What?" you asked, startled.

"You know, a happy place. Where you go in your head when you're feeling sad or lonely."

"Um...I guess..."

"Mine's a meadow," declared Harry.

"A meadow?" you looked at him.

"Yeah. Full of flowers. I imagine myself lying in the middle of it. The warm sun on my skin. There's a brook somewhere nearby and I can hear it rolling over the rocks. It's all very serene. And it calms me."

You stared at him for a minute, the image in your own head before looking down at your joined hands.

"Mine's a childhood memory," you said just above a whisper.

"What is it?" Harry asked softly.

You took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. It was your most special memory, one that you kept in your mind and brought back so many times, you sometimes wondered if it had been a dream, or you'd made it all up.

"I'm in my backyard," you finally murmured. "I'm playing with my dog for a bit until my mother comes out to join me. I ask her to push me on the swing and she does. Then my dad comes out, and he pushes me even higher. I almost feel like I'm going to fall off the swing, I'm so high up. But as I come down, he catches me and pushes me again. I can hear my own giggles mixed in with my parents' laughter. And it's the best sound in the world."

As the final word left your lips, you realized you were crying. Without a sound, Harry wrapped his arms around you, pulling you to him. He rocked you back and forth, allowing you to cry in his chest. The blanket had fallen off from the embrace, but it didn't matter. Harry felt amazingly warm and comforting.

"It's okay," he cooed, rubbing your back. "That's a lovely memory."

You wanted to scream, the voice in your head angry about what had happened to your family. But somehow Harry's serenity kept the voice at bay, making you feel at ease, and less on edge.

When your sobs subsided, you finally lifted your head, wiping the tears from your eyes.

"Sorry," you whispered.

"Don't be," he said.

Even in the dark, his eyes were so green, they nearly took your breath away. His face was so close to yours, you could feel his breath on your cheek. He lifted his hand then to wipe away another tear before brushing your hair back from your face. Then he planted a soft kiss on your forehead.

"I didn't mean to be a crybaby," you said.

"You're not," he grinned.

You stared at him for what felt like forever until he leaned in and gently brushed your lips with his. It was a soft, comforting kiss, though you still managed to feel it right to your toes. When he lifted his head again, you rested yours against his chest, wrapping your arms around his waist.

"This is it," you declared with a sigh.

"What's it, love?" he asked, his fingers tangled in your hair.

"My new happy place."

MASTERLIST | KO-FI | FEEDBACK

[sosa2imagines]

Revenge for doll!

Warnings- Just fluff, Bucky being the best best boyfriend ever! -----------------------------------------------------

Bucky stares at you as you finish getting dressed, he notices the shine in your eyes and the way you excitedly fix your hair. He can already tell it's going to be a good day. As you turn around and smile at him, he can't help but smile back, your excitement is contagious.

“You look happy, doll.”, Bucky mentions as you prepare yourself to go to work. You nod, a smile dancing on your lips, “Yes, I am excited!!! I have been working hard on this project, and I think it's going to pay off!”

“That's great to hear!” Bucky replies with a hint of pride in his voice. He knows how hard you've been working and how much this project means to you. It's always nice to see you enjoy your work and have something to be happy about.

“Yeah, I think this is gonna be my breakthrough”, you reply with a smile. “I've been putting a lot into it, and I'm confident that I'll finally get some recognition for my efforts.”

“I’ll see you soon, bubba!” You say, grabbing your things and heading out the door. Bucky watches as you walk out, a warm smile on his face as he kisses you goodbye.

You arrive back from work within an hour of leaving, Bucky is surprised to see you so soon and asks, “Back so soon?”

Bucky looks at your face and can see clear as day, that something is wrong. He doesn't say anything though, as he knows that sometimes trying to dig into what happened right away isn't the best thing to do. Instead, he simply waits for you to speak when and if you're ready to do so. He watches you change from your work attire to your comfortable pjs and tank top.

You pouted and looked at him, before looking at the bed and Bucky was quick to be by your side. You and Bucky lounged lazily together in bed. You were on top of Bucky, hiding your face in the crook of his neck, his hand was inside your tank top, drawing soothing patterns on your back, as his other hand caressed through your hair. You’d had a bad day and you still hadn’t even spoken a word to Bucky.

But Bucky didn’t mind.

After some minutes passed away, you mumbled loud enough, so he can hear you, as if his super hearing was not enough. “Sorry.”

Bucky sighed, not bothering to shift your position. There was a small pause and he spoke softly. “What for?”

“For me being like this...” you furrowed your brows, as if he could see you. “Like what, doll?” Bucky asked. He was in no rush to speak he just wanted to hear what you were willing to share. His hands, however, were busy, rubbing against your back in soft circle and caressing your head.

“Coming home like this and spoiling the whole mood...” you pouted, taking in his cologne.

He chuckled softly as his fingers brushed against your skin. “It's okay. You've had a bad day, that's not your fault. I wouldn't want you to pretend you have a good mood, when you're hurting.”

“You don’t deserve this…” your voice was soft, almost a whisper.

“Hey I've been with you for the past two years. I know that you have days that are hard. I know that you get moody sometimes.” He let out a small chuckle. “You've seen me in my worst moments, doll. I'm a big boy I can handle days like today. I've dealt with worse. Let me take care of you, let me spoil you.”

You finally moved your head from his neck, to look at him, “I'm lucky to have you...”

“Yeah?” Bucky chuckled. He moved the hand from your chin to your cheek, and lifted the other to trace a finger over your eyebrows. “You're lucky that you have me?”

“Yes.... You are too precious for me!” you tell him confidently.

Bucky hummed, a chuckle escaping his lips. His hand stilled for a moment, and he tilted his head to the side as he looked down at you. He moved moved both hands to cup both sides of your face, squeezing gently.

“I’m ready to talk now…” you voice was muffled, as he squeezed your cheeks again.

“You are?” Bucky asked softly, not really surprised. His grip was firm, but not too tight, and his thumbs rubbed against your cheeks. It was calming, his touch putting you to ease. “Alright, then. Tell me... tell me what happened.”

“Ackerman”, the moment you said your boss’s name, Bucky’s body tensed as he got a feeling this is going to be bad.

“The project I was working upon, Ackerman he gave all the credit of the project to Rosalina and promoted her.” Your eyes immediately well up, but you tried to control your tears.

Bucky's hands stilled for a moment as he thought about the implications of what you were saying. “He did that... when it was your project? The one that you spent hours on?” Bucky asked, his brows furrowing as one hand released your face to rest by his side. “That's unfair. And not right...”

“All the hard work and time, wasted and down the drain… Ackerman was like I see you have potential, but Rosalina is more capable of this”

Bucky was fuming now. “More capable? How is she more capable? You were the one working diligently on this project and she took credit for it when she did absolutely nothing. She gets a promotion, when you were the one who spent hours on this?”

“Trust me I did murder Ackerman in my head, the moment he gave her the credit and promotion.”

“I wouldn't blame you if you did.” Bucky mumbled, his jaw stiffening as he spoke. He let out a small, frustrated grunt. “You deserved the damn credit. You deserve to have the damn promotion. Not her not someone who uses her body to get what she wants.”

That genuinely made you laugh, you were happy to know Bucky remembers the office gossip you share with him. “I know but Ackerman doesn't, since then I can't stop fantasizing revenge scenarios against him.”

“Well...you know, he'd look really good with a black eye.” Bucky said the words with a teasing grin, but there was underlying threat in his tone, “I can always help you out with this, you know.” He'd do it too, if given a chance. If he ever saw Ackerman face to face, he'd give him a good punch in the face, no regrets.

“I know you will. I quit the job…” Bucky was close to giving you the angry puppy look, so you quickly cut him off “I was wasting my time there…maybe I should consider somewhere else” to that Bucky gave you a nod, though the pout was still there.

“Just for future knowledge he goes to the local bar every Friday night near the office.” That got his attention, “Does he now?” Bucky's grin grew wider as he noted your words, “And when you say every Friday night... you mean he’ll be there tonight?” “Yes.”

“Well now,” Bucky's grin was now almost sinister, “I think I'm just going to have to pay a visit to this bar tonight.” “Are you serious? No bubba, you won’t do anything.” “Fine, but I’ll be right back, I have to meet Sam for something.” He made the most adorable face, you could never say no to.

“Just Sam? No paying visit to Akerman?” “Yup and yup. Anything else, doll? ” “Just keep him alive.” It was no surprise that you had figured out his plan. “Alive?” Bucky tilted his head to the side, his grin even wider. “Huh... I'll see what I can do, but don't count on it.” Bucky chuckled, as he stood up, stretching out his arms as he did so. He then looked back at you, letting out his signature grin before he left.

Bucky was in the car with Sam, a look of concern on his face. “Kindly tell me, why am I in this?” Sam is clearly confused as to why he is there and he is trying to explain to Bucky why beating your boss up isn't a good idea. In his confusion, he keeps looking over at Bucky, who keeps shooting him a glare to try and get him to stop talking. “It's for doll's sake!”, he tells Sam bluntly.

Before heading to your boss, Bucky decides to take a detour to Tony Stark's house. They soon arrive and enter his house. As soon as they enter, Tony takes notice. “Bucky?” he asks, a confused look on his face.

Bucky tells Tony that he should give you a job, since he knows that he treats you like a sister and has wanted you to work for him for a long time. Meanwhile Sam, just looks at the two shaking his head. Tony looks at him for a moment, then back at Bucky. “You're serious?” he asks, disbelief evident in his voice.

“Yes!” Bucky gives him the angry puppy look which for some reason Tony can’t say no to, even though Tony had already made his mind, to give you the job. “Bucky, you know I've always wanted her to work for me. She's brilliant and creative, and I know she'd be an asset to my team.”

“Thank you, Tony.!” Sam tries to interfere again and explain to Bucky, “She got a new job now, we don’t need to beat her ex boss!” but Bucky doesn't listen and ignores him completely. Tony meanwhile encourages him to go through with the beating, “He deserves it for making her miserable back there, right?”

“Tony!” Sam warns him, but Tony just scoffs. “Shut up Wilson.”

Sam warns Tony not to encourage Bucky, but Tony scoffs “You know Barnes, Pepper had a boss once who treated her terribly and tried to take away everything she loved,” he explains with dramatic effects, “and I made sure to get back at them for it. It was completely justified, and I have no regrets.”

“Really?” Bucky asks in awe. “Yes, really.” Tony tells him mischievously. While Sam face palms himself. Soon the trio heads towards the bar, yeah Tony tags along, saying he and FRIDAY can help.

As Sam drives, Tony questions “what should we call this mission?” Sam visibly annoyed and worried snorts “Operation Vengeance” and Tony scoffs, “That's far too boring of a name! We need something cooler that'll set the tone for what's to come.”

“Revenge for doll!” Bucky says innocently, Sam raises an eyebrow and Tony laughs, “Now that's a name I can get behind. Revenge for doll it is.”

As soon as the trio reached the bar, Tony ordered FRIDAY to control everyone’s phones and cameras.

“This is a bad idea!” “This is a good idea!” “Revenge for doll! Ackerman!!!!!!!”

It had been more than two hours, you were pacing back and forth, waiting for Bucky to come back home.

“I'm back.” A few hours later, Bucky walked back into the apartment, the grin still on his face. His hands were bloodied, and his clothes were a bit messy. He was clearly...well, he looked like he been in a fight. “That went...incredibly well.”

“Bubba!! Are you okay?” you immediately began to check him for any injuries. Even though he is a super solider, you always worried about him, like he is a normal human being.

Bucky laughed, because he was really fine, “I'm perfectly fine, doll. Ackerman not so much, but don't worry about him.” Despite his reassuring words, there was a small cut just under his eye. You knew no matter how much you ask, he won’t tell you, so you silently kissed the cut, “My hero.”

Bucky smiled “Just protecting my doll” he said softly, cupping your chin and tilting your head up. His voice was still quiet, “Now, don't worry about the blood, it's not mine.”

“Oh, I know. He is alive...though right?” Bucky nodded, though he didn't elaborate further. “Alive enough.” Was Ackerman living? Yes. Did he have a broken nose? Yes. Had he fallen on the floor? Also, yes. Was he going to be hurting a lot tomorrow? Yes. Did he deserve every bit of it? Absolutely.

“So how about we celebrate your new job, on the couch, the counter, the bed and every single place in the apartment?” He looks at you mischievously making you blush. “What new job?” You ask, chuckling a bit.

“Stark wants you to work for him.” “Bubba! You didn’t?” you grin and Bucky nods happily.

You jump straight into his arms, “Hmm we should celebrate…” you giggle and Bucky captured your lips.

[bamboobooshark]

YOUR WADE WILSON X READER STUFF IS SO PERFECT OMG IM EATING IT UP FRFR

WADE WILSON X READER

‧₊ ᵎᵎ 🍒 ⋅ ˚✮ DOODLES : 580 WRDS

<RATING: PG-13, SOME LANGUAGE>

A/N : HI ANON TYSM FOR THE COMPLIMENT!!! I really am greatful that you and many others have enjoyed my Wade content so much. Also, hey, so could you possibly guess what happens in this? Could youuuu? It’s about Wade being curious about your self-drawn “tattoos”. I swear it’ll make more sense when you read it!!!

You’re lounging around in your bed like you have been all day. Wade lies next to you while playing some random game on his phone. It’s pretty quiet; the only noises in the room are you and Wade’s breathing and his game. His breaths are more quick and sharp, while yours are shallow and slow. He groans loudly and whines as per usual. “I died again, babe! Can you believe it?” he asks dramatically as he puts his phone down on his nightstand. You crack a small smile that only convinces him to continue. He makes his way to lay his head on your stomach, never ceasing his whining. “Why don’t you care? Why won’t you coddle me like I deserve?” he pouts, putting on his usual act when he wants attention. Wade’s efforts succeed when you let out a soft chuckle and move your arm down to rub his textured chest gently. He lets out an unnecessarily loud sigh before letting his eyes gently close. “Better?” you ask with a smile. "Oh, you bet your ass this is better,” he confirms while leaning into you more by the second.

When Wade opens up his eyes, he stares at your arm in confusion, then up at you. He looks back and forth between them a few times before questioning you. “What’s up with the ink all over your arms, pumpkin? You mapping out some tattoos you wanna get?” You shrug in response. “I just got bored earlier. They’re nothing really,” you tell him sheepishly, slightly embarrassed that he’s so focused on them. His fingers gently trace the set marks on your skin with an intrigued look in his eyes. You feel your cheeks warm more; he’s rarely this careful and quiet with you. You’re so used to him squeezing, pinching, and sometimes gently biting you. His fingers continue to trace the lines as if he were drawing them himself. His hand moves to hold your forearm to get a better look at the doodles. He lets out a curious ‘hmm’ while squinting at your arm. “Oh,” he exclaims while smiling. “These would be really fun to color in,” he says in a tone that begs you to let him. You nod in agreement to his suggestion. “I guess it wouldn’t hurt,” you sigh to him, and he smiles so hard you see his teeth showing.

Wade stays intrigued for the next few hours with coloring on your stick, trying his best to stay inside the lines because, according to him, if you’re going to allow him to color your “sacred silken skin,” then he should at least try to make it look nice. He bites his bottom lip into his mouth and hums for a moment. “Why did you make this one so detailed?” he grunts. “I don’t know. I told you I was just bored. I didn’t expect to end up with you trying to color in every little doodle,” you chuckled while watching him work inside the lines. “You better make these easier to color next time you draw all over yourself,” he mumbles while pouting. “Do you ever stop complaining?” you ask him as a joke. He gasps and squeezes your forearm a bit. “Will you ever stop giving me reasons to complain?” he sasses back. You widen your eyes as you realize he makes a good argument. “Whatever,” you groan in response. He chuckles sweetly as he finishes coloring in the doodle he’d been fussing about, moving on to the next one.

[modmad]

How do you deal with being unable to draw some days? My arms have been injured this past week and I feel like I’m worthless as an artist because I can’t push through the pain. I know resting is important and my injuries won’t last forever but it feels as though a huge part of myself has been taken away from me, how do you do it?

no lie those days/weeks/months/years Suck. it's very hard to disentangle your self worth from your productivity, and I still feel that way even when I can draw, because I have to work slowly and in small amounts so that I don't hurt myself! it's maddening, but I am trying to find solice in the fact that I am not valued by my output. This is a constant process, and sometimes I forget that I am not a machine for making 'content' which will be thrown away if it breaks. I am a person and a piece of the universe, and sitting reading books and watching movies and lying down in a nice patch of sunlight is an excellent use of the precious time that I have, it is not a waste of it.

The best piece of advice I have is look at animals! Look to your pets! I adore my lovely cute lil scrungly snootle dog so so so much and she doesn't work at all! I am so happy she is in this world! I love her when she is running around, I love her when she is eating, and I love her when she is sleeping. Same for plants. You don't walk up to a tree and be like 'hey, why aren't you doing anything? meet your damn quota.' The next time your brain is bullying you for existing, turn around and repeat whatever it said to a squirrel or a bug or a cloud or a table. It helps you to see how silly it is to say it to yourself.

Still. Not being able to draw does suck. I generally watch movies and read books and do gentle exercise. Go for walks, listen to music, talk to friends about how you feel. They will care, and the time will pass. Eventually.

[klxudykai]

the ugly part of reality shifting

as great as shifting is, its really fucking draining. like REALLY draining. its nice that people want to show the fun and positive side of shifting and all, but once new shifters (specifically) hit the stage where they're drained and extremely demotivated, they aren't going to know how to deal with these new overwhelming emotions. reality shifting takes a toll on our mental health even if we don't like to admit it. this may not apply to everything, but I know it applies to the majority.

ive been shifting since 2021 (if you saw my post Abt me starting shifting in 2019 that was wrong lmfao mb yall-). and I still haven't shifted. I used to think I'd shift within 4 years but surprise surprise. I haven't. I'm drained and demotivated. I don't completely believe I wont ever shift, but I don't think I can get what I want by manifesting or affirming or doing any of that. I think the universe will just randomly hand it to me. it sounds dumb but that's the weird luck I have. when I don't expect it, I get what I want. but when I try hard and I expect it, nothing happens or I get smth worse. i don't think that even when I put blood,sweat, and tears into this that I'll shift. I've discovered so much shit about myself yet I am still here with no experience of what its like in another reality let alone my dr. never saw my dr once. only in my dreams and my imagination.

im going to be completely honest when I say that shifting is not for the weak. I'm not saying this to get you to quit because shifting is one of the best things that I found. I just want you to know that its not always going to be perfect. you might feel desperate, you might feel homesick, you might feel exhausted mentally. and sometimes you'll make progress but then find another obstacle. quite frankly, fuck the obstacles because that's not the issue. its how you deal with them that really determine how your growth goes. and no I'm not saying it controls if you'll shift or not because it doesn't. but if you're a person that gives up easily, its going to be hard to overcome those blockages. I say that because I myself give up easily. which is ironic because I don't give up when it comes to certain goals I want to accomplish (one of those goals being shifting), but I refuse to get rid of those so called "blockages" and avoid them even though I know what's the problem. I avoid them because I don't know how to fix them and I just have this fear that's telling me I'll fail.

this post probably doesn't make a lot of sense but that's because I'm writing this in the heat of the moment so I'm not doing a lot of thinking, I'm just typing. what I'm saying is don't be that person that avoids the problems. be transparent with yourself because I'm telling you, the more you avoid it, the more drained youre going to become. it might turn into an endless loop where you think about your Dr daily but you have zero energy to shift. and it fucking sucks.

overall, please take breaks whether they're mental or shifting breaks, if you feel like there is an issue with yourself, fix it. this is a hard journey but it will be a lot easier once you're honest and overcome problems that need to be solved.

(disclaimer that this may not apply to everyone, just the people who are going through a rough patch in their journey. this is mainly just my perspective and what I've heard from a friend of mine since our issues seemed pretty similar. and if anyone needs someone to talk to, my DMS are open. I want my blog to be a safe space and that this is a place where not everything is perfect. I love y'all and please take care and don't stress yourselves <33)

also, fuck that toxic positivity shit that just makes mfs more drained. if you feel demotivated address it don't push it away

[aestheteangel]

Synastry aspects that I personally don’t like.

before i start please read that I am not an official astrologer so take this with a grain of saltttt too haha. Just for fun.

North node square north node ( I’m sorry but each one lives in a whole different worlds, completely different perspectives, mindset, somehow not letting each other move to the next step)

Chiron in 7th house overlay. ( now Chiron isn’t always bad, but there’s kind of.. pain it gives , it’s not any better in other houses, but I’m saying romantically, there could be hurt during the marriage... if you want Chiron overlays in synastry please lmk)

Pluto/Uranus in 12th house overlay. ( now Mose of y’all know 12th house overlays arent so good eventually, but i think Pluto or Uranus being there could be harsher than any other planet , could indicate so many things, one of them unpleasant endings in the relationship, finding truth about something suddenly, betrayal..in worst cases you won’t be able to forget each other )

Saturn 8th house overlay. (Sure y’all know why..)

Mars conjuct Mc/10th house. ( uhhhh it just don’t give me nice vibes when both are seen in public eye. Could be arguing in public a lot, the mars person makes it hard for the 10th person to forgive them. Works even in composite chart )

Mercury square Saturn. ( a lot of judgements and misunderstandings)

Chiron opposite asc/Venus.

Saturn opposite Neptune. (Broo)

Moon opposite moon. (Now tbh Im not really sure of this one since nobody complained about it and it could indicate “slight” emotional understanding difficulties with each other that can also cause attraction. But I’ve seen this aspect with some couple that really can’t stop hurting eachothers emotionally . )

Another moon aspect, ofc moon is the first thing you should observe In synastry s, it simply represents how each other’s emotions play with the other. now moon square moon. Obviously most of y’all know why, literally each one is on different page when it comes to how they view emotions which makes it pretty hard to understand each other’s feelings with the square aspect. ( believe it or no I have this one with my man, even knowing it I’m still with him lol. yes the attraction is definitely there due to other loving aspects and also with this one, it gives attractive energy yes. but still, he don’t understand my emotions and my point of view, struggles with analyzing me sometimes or what I even think , even when I try my best to throw him an obvious sign about something, without me speaking, he don’t get it where everyone else does same goes for me 🤣😭. he sometimes thinks I mean something the opposite of what I meant. Bottom line is with this aspect you need to speak each other’s feelings and what you want to tell the other cause it’s way too impossible to understand eachother with no words spoken. 😓 AAAA THIS IS THE ONLY STRUGGLING PLACEMENT WE HAVE AND ITS NOT EVEN A SIMPLE ONE)

Mars in 5th house, ( Now this is NOT a red flag, bUTTTT i always read about this placement represents a “not lasting relationship “ and tbh every fling I had I had this placement with, literallyyyy very guy I used to dm or talk to even for a couple of days, attraction at first but then boom, you din yourself not talking to them anymore for god knows what reason lol, so there’s something interesting about this placement. 🤔🤣 ( pink for flings 🤣)

Mars 1st house.... ( uhh you know what? Wait for part 2 😛 )

But before part 2 I’ll make my next post positive I promise, I didn’t even want to write red flags placements because it shouldnt be taken seriously haha. So next post will be about .. hmm wait , what you guys want it to be about?

Synastry observations

Natal chart observations

composite observations

Solar return observations

— Y’all literally if u find one of these placements in your synastrys it’s totally okay lol, I have multiple of these w my man and tbh some of them don’t really play this negative way for us, but i just did them for fun , ofc don’t take these TOO seriously 🥰

[krystalcat]

Keep It To Myself

ღ Pairing: Jeong Yunho x fem!Reader

ღ Genre: Smut, angst

ღ Word count: 5,4k

ღ Warnings: cheating, toxic relantionship, voyeurism, reader is Yunho's lover,fwb with Mingi, unprotected sex (big no), creampie, fingering, oral (giving and receiving), dom!Yunho, sub!reader, yunho is massive, pet names(bunny), repressed feelings, praise kink, dacryphilia, rough sex?, lots of teasing, a sprinkle of degradation?, lmk if I forgot anything

ღ Summary: It's hard to keep your hands to yourself when someone like him crossed paths with you. Too bad he wasn't yours to begin with, but it's not like he cared anyways.

ღ Notes: This is the first time I'm writing smut fanfics. It's also been a long time since I've written anything. I hope you like it and I'm very open to (constructive) criticism! Also, English is not my first language and I haven't proofread this, so it's very possible to have grammatical mistakes or sentences that don't make much sense in English. I also got inspired by Elise's Keep It To Myself, so check that out! I'm also not entirely happy with how this turned out, but I figured it was best to post it before rewriting the plot for the 3rd or 4th time lol

ღ Disclaimer: This is only fiction, by writing this I am not trying to represent the member(s) in any way.

You tried studying in peace, but it was difficult when your roommate and his girlfriend were arguing for what it felt like the fiftieth time that week. After months, you still didn’t get used to it.

Despite not being close friends, you didn't think Yunho was the problem, since there was never gossip in your group of him being a toxic person, and the more passionate fights you heard, it was confirmed.

You saw his girlfriend’s behaviour regarding their relationship and Yunho: restricting who he spoke to, deleting his girl friends’ contacts on his phone, getting angry if he doesn’t answer quickly. You’d sometimes even laugh to yourself, saying she was another roommate - the only difference between her and you being the unpaid rent - so those atitudes weren’t hard to miss.

Hell, sometimes you even wondered how she never made a fuss of him having another woman as his roommate, at least you never heard an argument about that.

What bugged you the most was why the hell he wouldn’t break up with her, because he does recognize she’s not a good girlfriend, his screams coming from the kitchen confirm that. Their arguments have just gotten more frequent and boorish over time.

But now it wasn't only their fights that made you distracted. You would be lying if you said you didn't have a slight crush on Yunho when you first became roommates, always so polite and gentle whenever you both were in your home. But that's just him being nice and a good person, and after he had gotten a girlfriend you knew your feelings had to go away, which wasn't particularly easy since you both shared a house, but you still managed to do it.

The problem now? They came back stronger than ever. You knew that if you spent more than five minutes in the same room as him, you’d leap onto his arms and his girlfriend would literally kill you. Why? For the past two weeks or so right after they fight, they have some sort of angry-make-up sex, making you unable to control your fantasies.

Hearing Yunho’s groans and moans for the past days made you start having a sexual attraction towards him, and pleasuring yourself to them has been your guilty pleasure. You knew it was wrong, no amount of problems with her would make it okay for him to cheat, but God, the things you would do to switch places with her on that bed.

In the middle of the day, you would suddenly imagine the most filthy and nasty scenarios that made you crave those hands on your cunt, those lips on your breasts and his cock pounding deep inside you. You were addicted to something you hadn’t even try before.

You put down the pencil you were holding when you heard moans coming from Yunho’s room - his moans. Quietly making your way to your bed, you took your shorts and panties off, then laying on your bed.

“F-Fuck, Jiyeon” His faint deep groans sent a shiver down your spine. You suppressed your moans as you rubbed circles on your clit, adjusting your pace to the volume of Yunho’s moans, imagining it was you who made him feel that good and all the indecent things you would let him do to you.

Despite everything, you swore to yourself you’d keep this desire to yourself, that you would never flirt or makes moves on Yunho while was on a relationship.

But that is so fucking hard when he didn’t help you to repress your yearnings at all.

«---- ღ ----»

While binge watching your favorite show, you see Yunho walking out from his room, completely dressed up: white buttoned-up shirt adorned with a black tie, black oxfords and pants that matched his dark blue suit. He checked himself out on the mirror in the living room, “I’m going out and probably won’t come back until tomorrow noon”.

“Got it” Your attention returned to the screen in front of you, hearing his shoes clicking on the floor and the front door shutting.

After maybe a episode or two, you heard the front door opening, hearing Yunho knocking his shoes on the entrance. You turned your head around to be met with a pissed Yunho.

“Didn’t realize it was tomorrow already” You snorted as he entered his room, gaining a grunt from him.

He went back to the living room, standing in front of the tv. You’d probably roll your eyes, if he wasn’t with the first four buttons unbuttoned. My God were you really malfunctioning just because of a little cleavage? You had no shame at all, “Yn I’m not in the mood for jokes right now”.

Quickly admiring his figure, you tried your best to not look affected by his looks, “Do you want to vent or need advice? If not, let me watch my show” His fingers massaged his temples, making him sigh.

“It’s nothing much, but would you really listen to me?” He sat next to you, positioning his elbows on his knees and turning his head to you, you paused you show and sat in a more comfortable position, your body facing his. Now this was unexpected, Yunho was always a reserved person who didn’t want to bother other people with his problems.

“She was supposed to meet me almost two hours ago for dinner and she’s not answering my texts or calls. We aren’t in the best terms lately and I’m scared, for us and her as well”

“Do you know were she might have gone?” He shook his head lightly, “Look, I don’t want to be rude, you don’t have to answer me, but why are you even with her?” He gazed into your eyes, opening his mouth to speak, only to close it again and divert his gaze from yours.

“I’ll have some drinks” He got up, “I’m not mad at you for asking that, I just need to clear my thoughts” He grabbed the keys he had previously left on the kitchen table, heading to his way out.

The butterflies in your stomach meant you should leave him alone, that you shouldn’t spend any sort of quality time together with him, it would melt your mind, making you bound to do something stupid. At the same time, you were worried Yunho would get himself in trouble, that he would let his emotions get the best of him, and you couldn’t bear something happening to him.

“Absolutely not” You got up from the couch heading towards his direction.

“I just want to be alone”

“Yeah but I’m not letting you go through that door”You crossed your arms as he stared back at you, “We don’t need to talk further, but stay here for a moment to collect your thoughts, I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret tomorrow, ok?”

He looked at you, to his feet, then getting up and going to his room. You sat back down, diverted your gaze and resumed the show, thinking he would disregard your words and go on with his life.

“What are you watching?” You jolted a little when he sat next to you - maybe a little too close for your liking, stomach doing flips and cheeks heating up - now dressed in black sweatpants and a white t-shirt.

And that’s how you two got closer, dangerously too close, because if being in the same room with him before was hard, now it was arduous. You both would now steal little glances at each other, he would flash you little smiles. When Jiyeon wasn’t there, you’d both tease each other while doing mundane tasks, which was mostly borderline flirting.

Also by some miracle the huge fights stopped, only small arguments here and there. Maybe Yunho did it out of respect for you and the conversation you both had that day, maybe Jiyeon just happened to be in a good temper, who knows. Everything seemed perfect: their relationship was great, no more angry sex, so that attraction towards Yunho disappeared and you had no more guilt looming over your head.

However, after that step forward, you took 100 steps back, because you were now having actual feelings towards Yunho. His smile brightens the room, his touch sends waves down your spine, his presence makes you feel giddy, his teases and flirts make your heart flutter. You had no idea how you got yourself in this situation, perhaps getting closer to him was the last thing you should’ve done to the greater of your sanity.

Your heart spoke louder than your mind, since you couldn’t distance from him once again, not now when you both are friends, and you know what a gentleman and nice person he is, you loved having him around.

What was your next move then? Getting someone else to replace your attraction towards Yunho, which you found quite hard, since you didn’t know many guys, let alone the ones that are both single and decent. Maybe that was a shitty move from you, but it’s still way better than playing around with someone who’s committed.

Lucky you, a few days later Yunho’s friends - who you already knew - came over to play some video games with him, and one of them ditched the hangout to make some moves on you.

“Sooo, are you single?” He asked, leaning on the wall as you made some noodles for dinner.

You laughed at his question, “You know I am Mingi” The tall guy approached you, “Just making sure, I find it hard that a beautiful woman like you is all alone”

“You sure know how to flatter someone” You giggled, turning your head to him with a smirk on your face “What do you want Mingi?” His confident attitude dropped as he widened his eyes, making you laugh lightly “Cat got your tongue? I know you want something, I just want to know what it is”

He cleared his throat, then asking “I-If I asked you if you want to go out with me, would you say yes?” without looking at you. You did not expect him to say something like that, and thought about it for a little: while you wanted to forget Yunho, you couldn’t use one of his friends as a toy, even you had limits.

“L-Look Mingi I think you’re cute, but I’m not ready for something serious and-” He interrupted you, “I thought about something more casual, if you know what I mean.” You let out a ‘oh’ “I-It’s totally okay if you don’t want, but since we’re both single and as I imagine frustrated, I thought why not...?” He clarified, still not making eye contact with you.

“Why not try?” He shot his head up at you, eyes wide and a slight smile on his face, “Really?” You nodded, “Do you want to go out tomorrow or do you think it’s too quick?” He asked. You approached him, gluing your body on his and wrapping your arms around his neck, “Tomorrow seems good”

He snaked his arms around your waist, kissing you slowly as his hands roamed your ass, sometimes tugging at it. Opening your mouth to deepen the kiss, you hands also made their way to his clothed crotch, making him separate the kiss and grunt silently. “Go back to your friends, I’ll make up for you tomorrow” You whispered, making him roll his eyes as he let go of you to go back to Yunho’s room.

Your little relationship with Mingi - if you could it even call it that - was doing you wonders, for some time your feelings for Yunho faded, specially when Mingi was balls deep into your cunt, all you could do was scream and whimper his name, brain turned into mush. Still, from time to time you would think it was Yunho instead of Mingi fucking you dumb, but you tried your best to repress those desires.

But one day you slip up, you moaned Yunho’s name out loud, and to say you were embarrassed was an understatement.

Mingi halted all movements. “I-I’m so sorry” You muttered under your breath, only loud enough for him to hear, voice cracking as tears filled your eyes. Mingi removed himself from you, “Yn look at me”

You refused to, continuing to stare at the pillow as Mingi caressed your hips, waiting for your response, “Yn I’m not mad, we’re not together, I’m just confused,” He heard your sniffs, making him turn you around and hug you.

“Do you want to stop?” You nodded, making him hold you tighter until he calmed you down enough so that he could bring your and his clothes.

After explaining the whole situation to him, he said he wouldn’t mind to keep your little ‘friends-with-benefits’ thing going on if you still wanted it and assured you he didn’t care about the slip-up. At the end, you knew he understood the mess you were in and took pity in your situation.

«---- ღ ----»

You were awaken from a loud thud coming from the living room, heart racing as your mind thought about the most far-fetched and terrifying scenarios that it could. Slowly getting out of the bed and tiptoeing towards the bedroom door, you heard some mumbles coming from the other room.

You put your ear on the door to hear better. Knock knock knock. You jolted and gasped silently, backing away from the door, “Yn?” A female voice called from the other side, making you realize who it was. Opening the door you saw Jiyeon, smeared lipstick and smokey eyes adorning her delicate face as she reeked from alcohol.

“You scared the living shit out of me!” You whisper-yelled.

“Sorry, um... Yunho and I were at the club with some friends and he is pretty wasted, can I ask a favor?”

“Go on”

“So tomorrow I will be leaving town to meet my family, and I can’t be here looking after Yunho until he falls asleep, could you do that?”

“Jiyeon, I’m sorry but-”

“Please! I know it’s late and that I should have managed my time better, but it’s just this time and I trust you more than his friends to take good care of him”

Now, that was odd. Out of all the people in his life, you were the one she trusted the most? When you literally have feelings for him, have touched yourself while thinking of him and while she was the one on his bed. But Yunho is still your friend after all, surely nothing will go wrong while you care after him and tidy him, right?

“Okay, I'll try and do my best”

“Thank you so much, he's in the couch, probably half-awake” You both went to see him, he was laying on his back, hooded eyes staring through the ceiling, “I'll go now, thank you once again”.

With the door closing, it was just you and a drunk Yunho, who seemed to have a staring contest with the white ceiling.

“Yunho, are you feeling nauseous?”  He kept facing the ceiling as you called his name from afar, “Yunho?" You spoke louder this time, getting closer, the smell of cheap liquor invading your nostrils.

“Uh... Whaaat?” His slurred speech would have almost made you laugh if you weren't worried sick for him.

“Do you wanna puke?” He shook his head. “Okay, let's go to your room, can you get up?” He slowly shifted in his seat and stood up, losing his balance immediately, falling on the couch.

“Great” You massaged your temples, “How am I supposed to carry you to your room?” You sat on his side, putting one of his arms around your neck and holding it as your left arm wrapped around his torso.

With a little difficulty, you stood up. Despite managing to support him, his weight still made you bump on the hallway. Reaching his room felt like minutes.

You sat him on the bed, then unlacing and taking off his shoes as he watched you silently. Then helping him getting rid of the black leather jacket, leaving him in a white tee and black jeans.

“Look, you stink, I need to run you a shower” You explained, “This will be weird, because I need you to take off your pants”

He nodded, complying to your task slowly as you looked away to not make this any more embarrassing.

“You can turn” He said, making you turn around and trying to help him get up from the bed, avoiding looking down at his bare thighs and crotch area, cheeks burning up at the thought of it.

With a blink of an eye, Yunho's left hand was behind your head as his right propped him up, making you freeze on his hold. “Can I kiss you?” After what felt like an eternity, he asked, making you widen your eyes, no answer leaving your mouth.

You wondered if it was the booze or him talking, but his red cheeks, messy hair, somewhat slurred speech and daze gave you the answer.

“You're drunk Yunho, you don't know what you're talking about” You explained after a long staring contest, failing to cover the disappointment in your voice.

“I really want to kiss you” His grip on your neck softened a little, starting to caress it, “You look better with me, not with Mingi” Silence fell in the room, you looked away from him and bit your lip, sighing. Sure it wasn’t a secret you two were together, although it was just fun and games between you two, but it shouldn’t bother him that you’re with someone else.

“Yunho” You started with an hoarse voice, holding the tears threatening to leave your eyes, “You're speaking nonsense, let's go, I'll turn the water on for you”

The grip on your neck strengthened once again and before you knew it your lips crashed.

Different from Yunho, you kept your eyes open and wide, a million thoughts raced through your head, before finally giving into the kiss as Yunho urged you to become closer.

He bit your lower lip, taking the opportunity to insert his tongue in your mouth as you let out a silent whimper, deepening the kiss.

Getting drunk on his tongue, you threw yourself onto Yunho, both falling onto the bed without letting go of each other. Rolling on top of you, he started caressing your cheek with his thumb.

After the probably best moment of your life, you let go of him, finally allowing you both to breathe. As you stared into each other's eyes, Yunho's thumb and index fingers hooked into your chin, closing the small distance between you.

You don't know what it was, maybe it was the drunken state leaving your body, the guilt of taking advantage of Yunho or Jiyeon's words resurfacing your mind. But it probably was a mix of the three. You stopped Yunho, taking his hands off of you, making him frown.

“This is a mistake, you’ll regret it tomorrow, probably you won’t even remember this once you’re sober” You stood up “I’m turning on the water” You said as you walked towards the bathroom to do it, hiding the tears that threatened to leave your eyes, but for the sake of appearances and the possibility of him remembering these events tomorrow, you hid it.

You didn’t speak to each other as you gave him a bath, he sat on the shower as you shampooed his hair and rinsed it. You gave up on scrubbing his body in the middle of it due to your heartbroken state. After drying him quickly, you gave his some boxers and pajamas, waiting for him to go to bed to make sure he wouldn’t hit is head or fall down.

After putting him to bed, you crawled back to yours, crying yourself to sleep while thinking about what happened and how you fucked your friendship up, wishing all of this was just a dream.

The next few days were awkward, Yunho kept talking with you as if nothing had happened, probably because he didn’t remember, but you still couldn’t forget his kiss and his slurred words that night. He sometimes would ask if everything was alright, but you lied saying the last days have been tiring and you just needed to rest well.

«---- ღ ----»

You grabbed your keys, trying your best to make the least amount of silence possible since it was almost 1am. You had gone out with Mingi to a club, but before that, stopping at his house for some action.

The door opened, revealing your pitch dark apartment, just like you thought, Yunho was already asleep. You then shut it behind you and took off your heels to tiptoe towards your room. As you walked towards it, you saw the door from Yunho’s room wasn’t completely closed, a dim yellow light illuminating the hallway.

Since you didn’t hear a sound, you thought he had forgotten to turn off the light on his bedside, still trying to silently get into your room, slowly turning the door knob to open it.

“Yn...” Hearing your name coming in a low grunt from the other room made you shot your head up. You were pretty sure it was a moan coming from Yunho’s room, your cheeks flustered at the thought of him jerking off thinking of you.

Interest and curiosity took the best of you, making you silently spy Yunho through the door crack. He sat on the bed, no pants on, boxers still hanging on his feet as he slowly jerked himself off. Your mouth opened wide at the sight of his cock’s size. It was probably the biggest you have ever seen in real life.

After admiring his show for a few more moments, you realized you should leave before he catches you looking and make everything between you two even more awkward. As you made the way to your room, the wooden floor creaked, making you internally cursing yourself, hoping he didn’t notice it.

“Yn?” Yunho asked, opening his room’s door wide. Lucky for you, you were already at the front of your bedroom door.

“S-Sorry did I wake you up?” You gave him a slight smile, trying to be as convincing as possible.

“For someone who insists that kissing me was a mistake you sure were enjoying the view” Your face dropped, making you look like a deer in the headlights. Silence filled the whole apartment as Yunho waited for an answer.

“I-I’m sorry” Was all you said before looking away from him and heading to your room, but Yunho wasn’t accepting that so easily. He grabbed your arm and trapped you between the wall and himself.

“I can see it in your eyes, why are you lying to yourself?”

“Because you’re with someone else, that’s why. Just because she’s a poor excuse of a girlfriend that doesn’t make it right for you to cheat on her ”

“I don’t care about her”

“Liar!” Tears slowly streamed down your face “If you didn’t care you would’ve ended things a long time ago!”

“It’s complicated, and you know that! If you liked me so much you wouldn’t have started a relationship with Mingi either!” You took his hands off of you.

“We’re not together!” You tried to get away from him, only for Yunho to grab you once again and plant a kiss on your lips, making you relax on him.

He deepened the kiss, making you snake your arms behind his neck, tongue and teeth crashing together as lust and passion dominated you both. Still not letting go of each other, Yunho guided you to your room, closing the door behind him.

He let go of you, leaning a bit back to check you out “Fuck I can’t believe Mingi had all this to himself, you’re so fucking pretty” He attacked your neck with light kisses and bites, making you a whimpering mess as you got wetter.

“I love hearing your little whimpers, you’re so cute, Bunny” A shiver went down you spine “Do you like the nickname, Bunny?” He whispered in your ear, taunting you “These clothes look good on you, but I bet you look better without them” He sat in your bed as you stood in front of him.

You slowly took your clothes, Yunho’s eyes not leaving your body as he licked his lips. Only in your undergarments, you straddled his lap, his hands touching and grabbing every inch of your body. With a loud huff, he took off his t-shirt to reveal his chest and abs.

He pulled you to another kiss, this time a more passionate one, caressing your face as he unclasped your bra in one go, letting the straps fall on your arms. You pulled away from him to take it off, him grabbing and kissing them as light whimpers left your mouth.

He grabbed your hand, positioning it on his tent, “Fuck baby, I need to feel you right now”, you got on your knees, pulling his pants down to his feet, revealing his boxers already with a wet spot on his clothed tip. Touching him through his boxers made him throw his head back with a loud whimper, “Please for the love of God don’t tease me y/n”

You smirked, pulling his boxers down, revealing a leaking and angry tip. As you had already suspected, Yunho was big, you had no idea how it would fit you, but that was something to worry about later.

You started by stroking him and giving him kitty licks, his noises soon encouraged you to try and take him. “Oh fuck...” Yunho moaned and dropped himself on the bed as you sucked his tip, trying to suck more every time your head bobbed up and down.

Tears filled the corners of your eyes as his length hit the back of your throat, loving the stinging sensation it left behind. You felt a hand grabbing your hair lightly, making you look up, locking eyes with Yunho, his filled with lust, “You’re taking me so well bunny” his compliments only made you wetter and more eager to swallow more of his cock.

“Let me help you out b-bunny” He grabbed your hair in a ponytail to then force your throat down his shaft, tears streaming down your face as he wrecked your mouth. You moved your panties aside, making circles around your clit as he kept controlling your head movements.

He let out a deep chuckle, “Is my bunny horny just by sucking me off?” You let out a moan at his words, throat vibrating around his cock, making him moan as well. His movements faltered as his groans got louder and louder, soon him releasing in your mouth and his grip on your head.

You quickly moved back, coughing from the lack of air in your lungs, your throat stinging a bit from the workout. Yunho grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at him. He kissed your tears away, loving how wrecked you looked when he had done barely anything to you.

“Are you okay?” You nodded at his answer “I’m sorry for being so harsh, if I ever do anything you don’t like please warn me” You laughed slightly at his concerns, “Use me however you want” You whispered to his ear, noticing how his lips curved in a menacing grin.

“Is that so? Lay on the bed for me then, love” Hearing Yunho calling you love made you dizzy, by this time you had forgotten he had another woman he could call ‘love’, not a single once of guilt tainting your heart and making you doubt this moment.

You laid on the bed, it was Yunho’s turn to get on his knees. He pulled you closer towards him, giving you kisses along your thighs as you begged him to stop teasing you. He dragged your panties along your legs, throwing it somewhere on the room.

“Holy fuck...” You moaned out loud when he licked your folds, burying his head on your cunt, eating you out like there’s no tomorrow. You tried your best to contain your moans, which only riled Yunho up even more.

“Y-Yunho- Fuck, calm down” You whined, feeling overstimulated from his mouth alone, without even coming once, feeling him smirk as the kept tongue-fucking you. He backed away from your dripping cunt, arousal dripping down his chin.

“I thought you said you didn’t want me to tease you”

“Fuck yes I did, but if you keep going on I’m not lasting long”

“Great that’s my intention” He pushed one finger with ease inside you, making you whimper slightly “More” He chuckled at your reaction, complying to your wishes and adding another one. He thrust his fingers in and out of you, eliciting moans from you. You loved how deep his fingers went inside your cunt, still, it wasn’t enough for you.

“Y-Yunho” You moaned out loud, incapable of forming a full sentence.

“Hmm?” He looked up to you, watching your fucked out face contort with please, “Does my bunny want more?” You nodded your head quickly, making him chuckle, “You’re such a whore for me” and how right he was, you would let him do anything to you in this moment,

He added one more, stretching your cunt out as he lowered his head to your cunt. You combination of his fingers inside you and his tongue flickering your bud turned you into a moaning mess. You quickly felt your high approaching, and Yunho knew that by the way your pussy tightened around his fingers.

“Cum for me bunny, I know you want to” His words were enough to drive you to your edge, making you cream around his fingers as he kept lapping your clit, riding out your orgasm.

He took of his fingers and put them in front of you, making you clean them up and taste yourself.

“Do you want me to grab a condom?”

“Forget that, just go raw” He widened his eyes, “A-Are you sure?” you nodded your head. He got up on the bed, positioning himself between your thighs and his length in your entrance.

“I’m going slow, tell me when it’s okay to move” He slowly inserted his head in you, making moan and wrap your legs around his waist. As he kept pushing himself inside you, your moans grew louder until he bottomed out.

“F-Fuck, you’re huge” You groaned, he stilled inside you as he caressed your face and thighs to relax you. “You can move” He started slowly, you bit your lips to suppress the moans from leaving your mouth, clawing at the sheets.

Yunho tested the waters by speeding up the pace, drawing more moans from you, which gave him the green light to fuck you dumb. He placed your legs on his shoulders and lowered down to meet your lips, giving a short peck.

“Fuck Yn, you’re driving me crazy” He moaned out loud, making you smile, to which he asked “Why are you smiling?” His pace never faltering, his tip brushing your g-spot every time.

“T-The name you’re moaning is mine” You managed to speak between moans, “My bunny is so dirty” He laughed, his thrusts getting sloppier and his moans getting louder.

“Come inside me, please” You locked gazes, he gave you a taunting smirk as he used one of his hands to draw circles around your clit. You felt like your mind was breaking apart from the amount of pleasure, soon feeling a knot on your stomach.

“Do you like being full of me? Fuck, baby I’m so close” He announced, before bursting inside you, your walls sucking him dry. You loved the feeling of being full to the brim by him. Still inside you, he kept drawing circles on your bud and sucking on your breasts. Soon, you came as well, moaning his name out loud.

He removed himself from you, feeling his cum drip down onto the sheets, making a mess, “I’m grabbing a towel, don’t move” He grabbed it quickly, you barely noticing his absence.

He cleaned you up, giving you kisses. Still, a question lingered on your mind.

“What about us Yunho?”

“I’m ending things with Jiyeon, I love you yn”

[nekosanhwa]

☆ saiki with a sunny! and basil! reader

content ! — gn reader. fluff. saiki trying to be mean and actually being mean. some ooc saiki (maybe?)

genre — headcannons

requested here

mercury speaks !— im sorry if the reader is ooc to the omori characters! I am not familiar with them and tried my best from what was requested, and I searched up <3

sunny! reader—

saiki, who dreads the arrival of a new nuisance to his class, thinking how students that have transferred to his class has been annoying and the past and you wouldn't be any different.

saiki, who is then surprised when instead of the annoying pest he expected, you stand at the front of the class, with a stoic face and a reserved demeanor.

saiki, who at first tuned in into your thoughts to find something off about you, since he couldn't believe his class finally got someone normal. but he then started doing it to pass time during class as you daydream about being the protagonist of your favorite video game.

saiki, who grows fond of said vivid daydreams, and in turn, becomes fond of you.

saiki, who doesn't try to befriend you despite actually liking your presence, settling for spending his time in your mind.

saiki, who, once he interacts with you, builds a silent friendship with you. not one in which you talk or go out together, but one in which you have a mutual respect for each other and enjoy being in each others company.

saiki, who finds himself drifting to you during group projects or class events, both trying to stay unnoticed.

saiki, who accidentally outs his powers to you while you both were hanging out during p.e. class one day, to which you only reacted with raising your eyebrows and a 'wow'.

saiki, who then has small conversations with you via telepathy, sometimes venting either about the nuisances he claims to dislike bothering him or how hard it is to be a psychic. neither of you opening your mouth to speak, with him reading your thoughts and him responding with pushing his thoughts to you.

saiki, who is comfortable opening up to you more than others. while he acts and speaks indifferently, you know he's fond of you as you are of him despite it not showing, it being a mutual understanding.

basil! reader—

saiki, who is indifferent to you at first when he sees you at the front of the class, shyly smiling as you introduced yourself. he saw you as not a nuisance but also nothing special.

saiki, who can't understand how you can smile so much and be so nice when your thoughts are so anxiety-ridden.

saiki, who unknowingly starts growing fond of you and silently accepts your friendship, noticing how you won't bother him and force him to befriend you while also kind to him.

saiki, who takes notice of your insecurities about being a burden to him and discreetly tries to quell them (not without acting annoyed about it).

saiki, who does so by nodding his head in reciprocation when you speak to him or ocassionally being the one to approach you to hang out in a comfortable silence.

saiki, who starts drifting towards you during school events and group work, silently hanging around you.

saiki, who accepts your invitations to hang out, knowing you'd take him into consideration on where you're going.

saiki, who allows you to hang out at his house if you invite him out but he isn't able to go, usually spending your time watching shows or playing video games.

saiki, who is comfortable enough with letting you see his powers, knowing it wouldn't change much between you both.

saiki, who finds comfort in your friendship despite you two being opposites, there being a mutual understanding between you two of the others personality.

[pleaseeeimjustagirl]

♡Dear Diary♡

September 15,2024

Heyyy girliesss I am really going to try and keep up with posting my diary entry’s for you girlies I love sharing my life with you girlies and I know a few of you have said you find it relatable and motivational<3 

♡Education♡

The fall semester has officially begun and I'm just trying to get a hang of everything. I am taking a total of six classes this semester wow I knowwww. This is going to be a bit stressful but I want to make sure I can manage my blog and get schoolwork done because I love my blog so muchhh. All my professors so far have been so nice and don’t seem like they will be difficult to deal with I know some professors can be a lot to deal with. I plan I download some notion planners online that I find and ill share them with you girlies if I find some good planners.   

♡Mental♡

July and August were very hard months for me mentally which is why I needed a break from creating I felt like my life was all over the place and I had no control over where I was going. I needed that time to figure myself out and thought that time I did. I am in a much better space thank god! Sometimes it is okay to get away if you need to especially if you have other people around you that you tend to pour into. You can’t pour from an empty glass you must be overflowing so take time away if you need it babes<3333

♡Physical♡

I started the 75 soft on September 1st. I am still on my weight loss journey. I have been consistent and sticking to what I need to do. Of course when my mental health wasn’t the best I wasn’t making the best decision for my physical health that is still no excuse but I'm being honest. I have been working on my relationship with food eating in moderation and walking. I started from ground zero with my wellness journey to reset everything and I’m happy I decided to do that. 

♡Hobbies♡

I am taking up new hobbies this semester my college has a lot of clubs and I plan on joining a few hopefully just to get myself out there. I have joined the hiking club we are going on the first hike of the semester this Saturday I am so excited!!! I also have been reading I started reading this book called “The Defining Decade” If you are in your 20s or your late teens I highly recommend reading that book. In this book, the author discusses the 20s and how we can use those years to benefit us in the long run instead of letting them pass us by. I am on chapter two so far and I have gained some gems. I can’t wait to finish this book.

Have an amazing weekend my lovessss and continue to affirm yourself, push yourself, and enjoy yourself. You are right where you need to be in life right now and you should enjoy every bit of It love youuu girliesss<33333

[ekpriyasi]

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 : jungkook x reader

𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: yandere, best friend to lover, jungkook is a hotty, angst

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: keep a tissue box with you guys

𝗦𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 : He loves bieng my friend ,but he has girlfriend who he loves ....could this possibly change him from your close friend to a distant person .. And 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦��𝘬 𝘤𝘰mfort

𝗣𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗼𝘂𝘀 :-

𝗔/𝗻: first all i am so sorry, so so so sorry.. I know it took this long but I just had a lot in plate this past time....i hope you enjoy 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀

*************************.

You cried, cried until you slept that night everything was blurry . For days you felt like you were sick nothing was making you happy you didn't wanted to live.

You felt utterly used Ridiculous.

Days after your argument with him. You ran into him at the grocery store .You went there so you could distract yourself after being shut in your apartment for 9 days . You were angry , you clearly were but then again you were naive you wanted to have a civil conversation. If it was to end you wanted to end this all on good terms.

"Hey" you greeted him, nervousness evident in your voice." uhh...hi" He could possibly see dark circles under your eyes it caused an uneasy feeling inside his heart. " Kook... Umm I wa -"

You were cut by an utterly annoying female voice you wished you never heard " jungkookie ... What is she doing here" . This bitch "I thought you said you ended your shitty friendship with her " that was your last straw, you knew she was the one that caused the drift between you and jungkook .

But you never thought he will bring the argument you two had in this way to her.. Clearly stating that he ended... "Oh , so you really wanted to end this up.. That's why you brought that shitty excuse of being busy " You said, not being able to control your emotions further. " Nari.. This is not what I meant.. Listen to me"

He sounded somewhat panicked" Stop stop it " You ran past him out of the store not being able to listen anything moreHe ran after you. He wanted to keep you away from him but reason and things where different than it was looking.. He held your hand turning you so you could face him " Listen to me, nari I don't want you to do anything stupid ".

"Shut up .. I am Fucking stupid… I’m so fucking stupid,” you cried.“Do I really not matter enough to you? All these years of being your best friend and… and this is how you treat me? I know you’re busy, I know work is hard. But college is hard too, people aren’t nice all the time and sometimes I wish I could call you, but I don’t want to bother you at work,” You cried harder

." Nari.. Please " You never screamed at him, you didn’t scream at anybody. You were always so soft, so gentle and tender. You were understanding. But Jungkook hurt you .More than once.And you were tired of it.

“I’m so sick of the person I love more than anything, hurting me like this… if this is how you’re going to treat me then I don’t want to be your friend anymore,” you said, voice breaking.“No, nari , please! Please don’t do this, I love you so much, just things are not straight right now nari, please!” He said, tears in his own eyes.

“Goodbye, Jeon… hope it’s worth it,” you said, turning to leave.Jungkook froze, his cheek stinging but he could hardly feel it over the agonizing pain that flared in his chest.He fell to his knees, tears streaming down his face.He was a fool…And he’d lost you for good

._______________*______________

Months passed and Jungkook stayed far away from you.No texts.No calls.But even after four months apart, you still couldn’t delete his number from your phone.

You couldn't bring yourself enjoying something or even talking to people . Its hard trying to ignore the pain in your heart but it's just there not going anywhere.. No matter matter how much you try you miss him, you really do You were now at the club waiting for your date to come , it weird being there alone.

It's not that you have come here first time but it's first time at club without jungkook. The volume of the music playing at this club was enough to blast your earbuds. The sweaty bodies clinging to your skin and the body odour in the air filling your nose trills was giving you ick. Sure, people are getting wild as time passes by but the dim lights was making it more sensual contrast to the atmosphere.

And there you see those dark eyes you wished you could just ignore staring at you , first at your face then at your outfit. It was the same outfit you suggested to buy just to tease jungkook cause it was way to reveling and he refused saying he don't want some weird guys ogling at you.

But after your fight you just found yourself doing everything that he refused to , out of annoyance just like you are doing now. He knew you didn't know he was there but your dress that was something he knew you did to irk him. “Hey! Y/n?” someone’s voice calling out to you make you came out of your thoughts.

When you focused, you saw your date standing a few foots away from you. You guys goes on a date some days ago, it went well and he suggested you should go on more dates with him, he would love that. He genuinely showed his interest towards you, even confessed to you that he likes you, very much. You were just feeling so sick of jungkook staring at you as if he will eat you . So without even a second thought you hugged your date.

If jungkook was there with his girlfriend enjoying why can't you. Jungkook is pissed, so much so that he goes straight to the seat he was occupying before, where his friends were seated and chugs down two shots in one go. Why is he so mad? He don’t know. Does It bothered him to see you with another man? Yes. Does he want you to stay by his side rather than that pathetic little piece of shit? Abso-fucking-lutely YES!

Jungkook just shrug it off as he took another shot which go straight down his throat, burning it in it’s way down. He doesn’t seem to find the reason why you like this men? Let alone date him? As much as he know, you’re not someone who is interested in these stuffs, so why now? It confuses and bothers him at another level.

What were you going to do now, have drinks with your date, kiss him or.. going to take him to your house and let him take your virginity. Now he found himself getting furious. But was he even getting himself so worked upMinutes passed, and then hour..... You were still with that guy visibly drunk as hell , and ready to go with him to probably fuck... That was the last straw for jungkook-

-----------------------------------------------

𝓘 𝓱𝓸𝓹𝓮 𝓾 𝓮𝓷𝓳𝓸𝔂𝓮𝓭 𝓲𝓽 ... 𝓹𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓼𝓮 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓿𝓲𝓮𝔀𝓼 𝓸𝓷 𝓲𝓽 🦢☁✨