#someone probably made this joke already but whatever

[4nstars]

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who apologizes a million times after he almost runs you over,He really didn't want to accidentally kill someone with Bakuguo's old bike.

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who 100% thought that doll that looked like you was adorable,he was already crushing on you since the moment he saw you.

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who didn't mean to make you think he was weird,That slug was just too cool not to take a photo of! And..well,nobody else was around! The cat couldn't take pictures,or Kaminari would've already made him.

Speaking of that,Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who thinks it's cute you clash so much with "his" cat,The purple cat just pissed you off so much that you screamed at him all the time? God,you were hot no matter what emotion you had on your face.

"What? He hates to get his feet dirty!"

"Wuss-pussss~"

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who doesn't believe a word you say when you tell him about "the other world" and what not,he thinks Sero gave you too much of the "good stuff"

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who absolutely loses his shit when you show him the magical tunnel that was where the wall should be,To your shock as well.

"What the fuck?!"

"Did you think I was lieing?"

Silence..

"No.."

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who chickens out after that,getting your boots thrown at him on the way out as he rode off on his bike.

"You gave me the doll,you jerk!"

"Well damn,I didn't think some demon lady would use it as a crystal ball or whatever!"

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who saves the day by coming to your rescue when that metal hand came chasing after you,almost killing him in the process. Thank God you were a handy person..

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who smiles as you both just look at each other,a comfortable silence overtaking the space. The cat hopped onto the stump between you two,and then into your arms.

"God..My mom isn't going to like how I explain this to her."

"It's okay..Ask her to come by tomorrow,We can tell her together."

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who's face goes red as the cat then leaps into his arms to bring him back to his senses. He smiles and nods,watching you walk off as he stands there with the most huge smile on his face.

"Man..They really are something..Aren't they, bud?"

"Mrow."

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who brings his mother by your parents' garden party and introduces her to you,explaining how you moving into the pink palace helped solve where Denki's missing aunt went.

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who knows one day he's gonna marry you when you get along so well with his mom,explaining something so crazy sounding so easily and sweetly.

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who insists the two "dingbag" old women from the lower pink palace apartment read his tea leaves,wanting to know if his future consisted of you.

"I see a strapping young woman/man/person in your future!"

"Huh? Really?"

"You're going blind Yaoyorozu,It's clearly a slug."

"Kyoka,I think I'm pretty aware of what a lover looks like."

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who jokes around and laughs with you when Mr.Aoyama talks about his "jumping mice circus". You're both very much aware it's probably never going to happen,but you could never say that to the poor man's face.

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who'd listen to you for hours on what it was like in the other world,how nice everyone was to you. He's determined to make that a reality,not just something that..whatever she was used to reel you in.

Coraline au! Denki Kaminari who's determined to love you no matter what,the shared trauma makes your bond stronger.

And damn does Coraline au! Denki Kaminari hope your bond is unbreakable.

[creative-frequency]

Lucanis Dellamorte x Reader: Late Nights & Delayed Confessions, pt.2

Summary: Late night of hanging out with the two Dellamortes. Lucanis is concerned for your wellbeing. Part 2 of 5. Word count: 1339 Notes: (Unresolved) romantic tension, pining, you’re an Antivan Crow, no spoilers for Veilguard → Part 1 → My writing masterlist

After instructing the tavern keeper to send up ‘whatever is the most expensive food and drink around here’, you excused yourself to freshen up. The room you had been given was at the other end of the long hallway from Lucanis and Illario’s, even though you were absolutely certain most of the rooms were unoccupied on the floor.

You ate, drank and talked for hours. A feeling that you could only describe as home warmed your chest. The little jabs Lucanis and Illario threw at each other, the silly flirtatious remarks from the latter, and the adventurous stories of grandeur, whose only point was trying to top the previous one. Just like always on the nights back in Treviso.

Things had always been like this between you and Illario; you were good friends who tossed flirty jokes around and shared gossip over a bottle of wine. He was… simple. Safe. On the same wavelength. Nothing romantic had ever happened between you nor were you interested in him as such.

Lucanis was like a brother to Illario, so you had formed this tenuous friendship, that was more about having a loved one in common rather than nurturing an actual relationship.

Lucanis was complicated; intelligent, efficient and business-oriented but also loyal to a fault, kind and considerate. He was an expert assassin, but his heart was in the right place. Not to mention you oftentimes had difficulties taking your eyes off him or stopping undressing him in your reveries. Lucanis was an enigma that made you itch and you yearned to scratch that itch. There was just no way it could ever happen and you had accepted it a long time ago. He was the grandson of the First Talon and you were just… you.

But there was also another reason.

You were terrified that one day Illario would realise you had been in love with Lucanis Dellamorte ever since the day you met.

While you ate, Lucanis and Illario told you about the Wigmaker contract in Vyrantium. It had earned Lucanis the moniker ‘Demon of Vyrantium’ and the rumours were already spreading like wildfire. Caterina was surely pleased.

Illario wanted to know more about your recent contracts, as much as you would be able to share. Lucanis tried to reel in his cousin’s eager insisting, ever the picture of a considerate gentleman.

“Fiore, I’m so happy to see you, but I thought you would surely be busy on a contract,” Illario tried again to inquire as to why you really had come to this small harbor town to meet them.

Maybe three glasses of wine was enough. You glanced at Lucanis, instantly regretted it, hoping Illario wouldn’t have noticed, and started talking:

“I am. Busy on a contract.”

“In here?” Lucanis asked, quirking a brow. The tone said all there was to know about the town and the probability of someone hiring an assassin on a target in such a place. There was literally nothing but the fish market, and a small harbor that served as a logistical centre for other towns further inland that couldn’t afford the taxes and expenses issued by larger harbours. Lots of people passed through, hence the fairly nice accommodations, but usually the kind of contracts you were dealing with would never turn their snooty noses towards a place like this.

“Not here. But–”

“The contract knows you’re onto them,” Lucanis ended the lie before you had the opportunity to speak it out loud.

You shrugged in admittance of defeat. It was just like him to follow your line of thought so fast, then just unravel the whole delicately woven web in a single pull.

“Ah, a false sense of security. I like this!” Illario clapped his hands together and patted Lucanis on the back – possibly as a way of congratulating his cousin’s quick wit.

“Also,” you started and cleared your throat, “There was a small incident yesterday, after I arrived in town.”

Lucanis and Illario exchanged looks.

“Who tried to murder you?” Illario asked in jest, but his smile soon dried up.

Lucanis placed his wine cup on the table and straightened up. He looked annoyed and his gaze started instantly scanning the exits in the room.

“I’m not sure,” you replied slowly. A pang of guilt tried to make a rise. “I took him down, but there was nothing on him to indicate if it was an order or a paid attempt. So who knows.”

“We should leave,” Lucanis said, still rigid and looking really unhappy.

“Come now, Lucanis. She said she took care of the amateur,” Illario argued and motioned towards the almost empty wine bottle. “Besides, we can’t leave a bottle unfinished. The Crows’ reputation will be ruined.”

“I’m sure he was working alone. I will be perfectly safe in my room,” you said and tapped the dagger hidden against your side. 

“Which one is your room?” Lucanis asked, just slightly relaxed.

“At the other end of the hallway.” You nodded to the general direction, already sensing where this was heading and it filled you with ominous tingling.

“Speaking of which, I should head to bed.” You started to rise up from the table and avoided both pairs of sharp eyes.

“Are you going to let her sleep alone in a place like this?” Illario teased, looking pointedly at his cousin.

“I can–” you huffed, but Lucanis shot you an intense look. His eyes were so dark and unamused that it shut you up at once.

“He is right,” Lucanis said. “We might not be able to hear you across the whole building if something happens.”

You swatted the words away. Whatever he was implying was not enough to bring you around.

“It’s fine. Seriously. I don’t think the Merchant Princes would waste any more gold on trying off little ol’ me.”

Illario nodded slowly but Lucanis didn’t look convinced.

“You’re a target. We don’t know who is after you, but if it were me, I would strike tonight.” Lucanis pinched the bridge of his nose and continued explaining carefully: “There are no witnesses. The building is only two stories high. No one will look twice at a murder in a place like this.”

You bit your lip. Lucanis was making a good case and perhaps only because you had been thinking about the same points yourself. If the assailant had not been working alone, it was most likely that they would try again before you had the chance to skip town. Maybe they knew you were with two other Crows, maybe they didn’t, but did you really want to risk it to keep your silly pride?

“I’ll accompany you for the night, just to be safe,” Illario said and for once you couldn’t detect a hint of ulterior motives in his tone. Though, the lack of confidence in your abilities stung.

Lucanis stood up and locked eyes with you. A chill rushed through you. He was determined. And maybe a little pissed.

“I’ll go. You didn’t sleep on the ship so you must be exhausted,” he said offhandedly to Illario.

“Always so considerate,” Illario replied with a blatant smirk that Lucanis missed. He too got up and stretched his arms.

You sighed in defeat and popped one of the few remaining grapes into your mouth. You should’ve never brought up the stupid contract. The Merchant Prince would pay extra for arranging this spectacular shit show.

“I will take care of her. Now rest,” Lucanis turned to say to Illario, who he found still smirking.

“Oh, I have no doubt you will.”

Lucanis replied to his cousin with a flat stare. Heat rose to your cheeks and Illario winked at you.

Great. So it was not about being confident in your abilities. He was just trying to push you into making a move on his cousin. You didn’t want to think about what that implied.

“Well, fine then. Shall we?” you asked Lucanis.

He motioned you forward. “Lead the way.”

There was just one problem: your room had only one bed.

-

→ Part 3

[weaver-z]

Well my three-headed calf sees THRICE as many stars as usual, so

[franklyimissparis]

the poet and the one-man band:

[tiptoethewordsgo]

its the final countdown!! just like they always sung about !!!

[deranged-and-crazy]

What if we…

writhed on a dirty bathroom floor and cut our feet off together…

haha just kidding….…unless…?

[birodactyloftheblog]

In an alternate universe the danny phantom fandom is called the dandom

[tooies]

guy whose pronoun's are who/whom

[pjlotrhhjeml]

I swear this ship was a joke at first...

[ghostieplus]

fuck ya life

bing bong

woke up today and realized that tumblr entirely killed fuck ya life bing bong so here ya go again

[yanderenightmare]

TW: nsfw, dubcon, coercion, bullying

fem reader

Your bully says he’s always been curious about what it’s like to fuck a geeky good girl like you—and that he’ll leave you if you let him have a taste.

You knew he was probably mostly joking when he offered… but you were sick and tired and perhaps a little desperate for the chance of him finally leaving you alone—so you balled your fists within his shirt, dragged him inside an empty classroom, and told him he could do whatever he wanted.

You don’t know who was more surprised.

He never knew you to be so brazen—but it’s not like you’re some blushing virgin, either.

You have experience. However, most of that experience is with nicer guys… not someone like him…

It’s not like you expected him to go easy on you, but still…

You bruise against the desk he has you bent over on—dewy-faced and panting, lying cheek-down in your own drool as he fucks full-chested moans right out of you. He snickers when your thighs shake, whistling with a grin when feeling your tight cunt flutter around him—slick dripping to the floor in a little puddle.

“You’re so wet it’s embarrassing.” He laughs.

He’s got your arms tussled behind your back, using your shirt as bindings—having balled your skirt up around your waist in two tight fists, knuckles white while using it to keep you still as he pounds into you with a mean snap of his hips. 

Your heart drops when you hear a rip. A second time when, you feel his movements still, and a thick warmth starts to fill you.

“Ah—fuck—don’t squeeze so tight—I’m ‘bout to—” He grunts, but it’s already too late once he pulls out.

Panting heavily as his cock drips with the last drop—hunched over—his eyes fall to your glossy cunt, half-mast while staring at the way his cum slowly leaks out of the still-fluttering little hole. 

He feels a cute-aggressive urge to slap it but doesn’t want to get his hand all sticky.

He pulls his pants up instead, only bothering to button his shirt up halfway, tie hanging loosely around his neck. Anyone with eyes could guess what he’d been doing with his sweaty hair and that flushed look on his face.

And yet he starts leaving without a care or a word. 

Already halfway out the door before you get your wits back.

“No—wait!” You warble, unknotting your sleeves to wrap your shirt around you. “You can’t leave me like this—my skirt…” You hold the tattered piece up for him to see, showing him the tear he’d made, rendering it unwearable.

His hand is still on the doorknob, only bothering to acknowledge you with a jaded look over his shoulder. “How’s that my problem?”

Your brows cinch that pitiful way it always does. That cute way that has his gut bubble and fizz. “Please…” You plead, and it’s almost enough to make his cock perk up again. “Just bring me a skirt from lost and found… please?”

He sighs—the door at his back as he leans against it with arms folded upon his chest. “Tch—and what's in it for me?”

You nibble your lip in thought—but you already know the answer. 

“I’ll be better at it next time—just... please?”

“Hm…” He hums in thought, a small smirk playing at the corner of his lips, tugged as if your words had pulled it with string. “Wait here, I’ll be back.”

The door closed with a click, and you were left in the classroom alone.

A few minutes passed. You doubted his return. 

You could always call a friend… but you didn’t want to get anyone into any trouble—calling them when they’re in class. Also, how would you even explain it to them? What type of person skips class to have sex in an empty classroom? Not to mention, they’d ask who you’d done it with—and there was just no way you could tell them. It’d be too embarrassing—you might just die—and if anyone else ever found out, he’d more likely kill you himself.

Well… suppose you could always make the run to Lost and Found yourself. The hallways should be mostly empty at this hour, but there’s really no guarantee. 

In the end, the thought of someone catching you in cum-soaked panties makes you hold onto all hope that your bully would return as he’d said.

And fifteen minutes later, he does. Black school skirt in one hand and strawberry milk in the other. Seemed he’d taken the time to stop at a vending machine.

But you don’t care. Breathing out a sigh of relief—gratitude on your lips as you leap over to him. “Thank you—” 

You eagerly accept the skirt—putting it on just as quickly.

He leans back against the door again, sipping his carton while watching you fall still with dismay. Humored at the pout that takes your lips as you look up at him with those pitiful doe-eyes.

“This is too short…”

He hides his smile with a tilt of his head. “Oh?” He grabs his jaw and pretends to assess your bottom half with focus. “Hmm… turn around, lemme see.”

You listen trustingly—as though you actually believe he cares. It almost makes him laugh out loud at how fucking gullible you are. But he keeps his act tight. Humming at the sight of the skirt only barely covering the crease of your cute ass.

“You’re right—something’s off.” He admits. 

You look back at him just in time to see his smirk before he grabs you. 

Keeping you still with an arm wrapped around your waist, he tips you over and grabs your panties—pulling them despite your body's protests as you wiggle in his hold. You cry as the fabric wedges up between your asscheeks, kicking your legs behind you until feeling it rip.

“There you go…” He coos while letting go of you, twirling the torn string in his hand. “Now it fits perfectly.”

He chuckles at the pretty tears clumped upon your lashes as you look at him with your lip tucked between your teeth until you finally get the grit to say what’s on the tip of your tongue.

“You’re an asshole.”

He sneers with a smile and bags your panties in his pocket—then turns around and opens the door. Leaving you worse off than before.

“Never said otherwise, buttercup.”

BNHA – Bakugou, Dabi, Shigaraki, Hawks, Shinso, Kirishima

JJK – Sukuna, Geto, Gojo, Toji

DS – Akaza, Sanemi

HQ – Kuro, Miya twins

[quoththemaiden]

Do you prefer reviews in the form of AO3 comments or Tumblr tags? Because I'm five minutes into writing tags and starting to realize this might be strange of me...

oopsie!omens pt 11- St. James Park, 1862

They don't listen, break up ensues.

prev chp / kofi / AO3

[certifiedestronaut]

Ya'll wanna hear a joke? Of course you do.

So a guy comes back to his apartment and his roommate asks "Where have you been?"

And he says "I was just on a date with a trans girl."

And the roommate asks "Oh really? What is she like?"

He says "One thing is she's pretty tall."

The roommate says "Really? How tall."

He says "Well, she has a good 3 inches on me."

The roommate says "That's very impressive, but I was asking about her height."

[birodactyloftheblog]

[reshinless]

❝ 𝐜𝐮𝐳 𝐢 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐞'𝐬 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐞 ❞ hsr x reader 𓆩 𓇼 𓆪

pairings. dan heng, caelus, sampo, welt yang, gepard, blade, jing yuan, luocha x gn!reader

a/n: i miss getting silly little reuqests like this . send me requests guys (if u snet a req b4 its not in the swag askbox anym sighhh), reupload from old blog!!

warnings:oh no SEX AND NSFW AAAHHH, breeding kink caelus, jing yuan, and blade, bc yes!!. kinda bdsm w blade, praise kink w jing yuan, degrading kink w blade, kinda sadist sampo, belly bulge 👍👍, fingering BUT NOT IMPLIED FEM READER 🤬🤬

dan heng is more than happy to be yours, legally, and to be the man to put a ring on your finger. has waited his whole life for this moment, to see you walk down the aisle and everything. and nothing more than finally carrying you in his arms to the bedroom of your newly built house. but having your hands pinned to the bedframe, as his cock is so brutally penetrating your hole, and he can't help but praise you for being such a good pet and taking all of him in you. the endless thrusts you felt that kept coming, and your hole so easy to work himself in and out from all the cum from the rounds that happened hours ago, it felt so endless in your mind, but dan heng couldn't help but indulge himself into you, because you're finally his, and he's finally yours. more under the cut.

caelus thought he was foreign to this kind of stuff, like no one would ever would love him like that back. but he's here now, and you are too. picks you up bridal style on the way up stairs, ripping your wedding dress off. (not rly, just takes it off you, but lets just say he did) all he wants is to literally fill your precious hole up with his seed :(( can't help but go another round, because his stamina was just too much for you to handle, but all it did was turn him on more! the way his cock made such a cute mark on your tummy.. he couldn't help but cum at the sight of how your poor hole will remember the shape of his cock, and his alone.

sampo..? i'm surprised someone actually married him, anyways! kind of rough with it honestly, still type of guy to just ravage himself in you. taking his sweet time, especially when you were so close.<3 your expression, and the way you were just whimpering, and begging for him to just harshly thrust into you to finish it up. all he could say was "i wanna make this night extra memorable for you, and me~!", wants to be begging for his cock to just shoot his warm seed into you already.

welt yang.. all i gotta say is that he's overjoyed, over the moon that he got married to someone as amazing, stunning, to be his world, his everything, the person he'd start a family with. but before all of that, ever since you both started your relationship, he promised himself, that on the night of your marriage, that's when he'd give you the time of your life. a time where you'll always remember. remember the way his huge cock would just be so rough with you aa, just wants you to get every drop of his cum till your belly bulge that he put inside you is so full of his seed, or that your hole will always remember the shape of his dick muahahahshhdkfjvi

gepard my man! already planned it out, knows exactly how the night will go, maybe.. but whatever happens tonight will be according to a plan. probably saved his virginity for this moment, he.. he's tried reading about it, just lets the night go as it is... i guess.. but dear god he really did not hold back, as soon as you gave the go sin that he could go as rough as he wanted, bro wouldn't hesitate AT ALL. just wants to see you so full of his cum it hurts mfmfjfjfjfn. he's jerked off to this moment before too, and the way you just take all of him in, he loves ot so muchh! will breed you like crazy, no joke, even if you're a guy, bro will say he's gonna get you pregnant. anyways, he'll be soft and gentle w u in bed if you want, but if u ever say to go faster, good luck in that wheelchair next day ‼️‼️

blade?!? getting married?!? damn!! very rough, lowkey forgets about you when he's at his climax. but he didn't really plan for it, just let the night play out. oh i have to say this but silver wolf is the flowergirl, kafka is maid of honor, and nanook walks him down the aile. anyways, bro doesn't hesitate to just absolutely breed you, be honest cause i know this man wants kids. and you will have them, don't give a fuck if you a man, he will breed yo ass. licks up the excess seed that didn't, or couldn't fit in your hole that was already so full of his seed. thank you 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥‼️

jing yuan!! oo he is probably the same as gepard, will plan it out, but probably won't go to plan at all. and probably has read smutty books too, just in case. and wow that really helped because just as long as you ask bro to go faster, he will non stop breed you 'till you have like 3 generations of heirs for him. jokes aside, but he would breed you so bad. just needs to see your hole so full of him that it's too much, and won't fit anymore! probably makes you sit on his face once or thrice after all those rounds of pounding you too ;3

luocha.. hmm, if you think about it really hard, lowkey dislikes the idea of sex at the wedding night, but we do not think about it really hard, he does it anyway!! he is the type to know all your spots, all the right places to make you cream on his cock over and over again, cuz bro is a doctor. and would finger you like crazy while making out before the actual intimacy. bro is so careful with you like you are as fragile as glass. his kink is just your whole body. everything about you, your curves, your thighs, your neck, he wants everything, and thats why he'd do it on the wedding night of his!!!

for america i say for AMERICA!!!! (i dont live in the us anym)

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