#some part of me wishes I could make something like that for someone or at least say something that's interesting and quotable for a while
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mariasont · 3 days ago
Note
hey girlie, first of all absolutely adore all of your hotchie fics no one writes him as well as you do!! second of all i am dying to read bimbo!assistant! x hotch smuuuutt (only if ur comfortable, pls ignore if not!!) i feel like that would be the only time hotch would have her completely and utterly speechless (idk why but i literally cannot get hotch w a breeding kink out of my goddamn mind!!!!!!) anyways hope ur having a fab day, and thank u for feeding us over the last few days 😘
Space Between Distraction & Indulgence - A.H
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summary: bimbo!assistant!reader want’s aaron’s attention. aaron wants to finish his case notes. too bad for him, you always get what you want
masterlist
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pairings: aaron hotchner x bimbo!assistant!reader
warnings: 18+ MDNI, explicit stuff going on here, fingering, p in v, no condom (bc we trust hotch is responsible but you shouldn’t be), dirty talk, hotch is a boob man sorry not sorry, after care with a side of psychoanalysis bc he can’t help himself
wc: 6k (got a little carried away my b)
a/n: thank u sm for requesting ugh!!!! u all r going to give me a god complex if you keep talking about how i write hotch LOLOL i love u sm hope u like the fic!!
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Saturdays with Aaron had a way of making time feel like something slippery and golden, something you could almost touch before it vanished between your fingers. The mornings stretched long and languid, a lazy kind of indulgence that should have felt endless, but somehow, with him, it never was.
You woke up late. Very late. The kind of late that made you blink at the clock in mild disbelief before flopping back against the pillows. And then there was the warmth. Not just the heat of the blankets, but something deeper, something winding low in your belly.
Oh. Right. The dream. You swallowed, biting your lip as if that might make the memory dissipate. It wasn't outright filthy, but it had been suggestive enough. Annoying. Frustrating. Embarrassing. It was the kind of thing that made you wish Aaron was still in bed.
He wasn't, of course. That would require Aaron Hotchner to do something reckless and irresponsible, like relax. If he wasn't keeping the country from total collapse, he was finding something equally as urgent to fix, probably buried in reports right now, coffee in hand, eyes scanning the page like national security depended on it. And maybe it did. You didn't know.
What you did know was that you'd been circling him all afternoon, orbiting like some needy little planet trapped in his gravitational pull, and he still hadn't acknowledged you. A small part of you—one you didn't want to name—had hoped he'd notice you by now. That he'd glance up, see you, reach for you. But he hadn't. And that was okay. Really. You weren't needy. You weren't desperate.
But you noticed him. You always noticed him. And this version of him, the weekend version, was particularly hard to ignore. The casual clothes, casual for him, anyway, stomped all over your ability to think straight (not that you had much to concentrate on in the first place).
The grey crewneck he had on stretched across his shoulders, molding to the shape of him like it had been made for him. His jeans, worn in all the right places, settled on his hips in a way that made you feel like a pervert just by looking.
Even his hair had you practically drooling. Not messy, of course—Aaron Hotchner didn't do messy—but it was softer than usual, a little mussed, like he'd dragged his fingers through it one too many times without bothering to fix it.
It made him look almost touchable, like someone who should have been stretched out next to you on the couch, letting you mess it up even more, not hunched over a pile of paperwork like the case files were going to disappear if he blinked.
His forearms flexed every time he turned a page, his muscles shifting subtly every time he moved. You didn't even realize how blatantly you were staring until his fingers skimmed up to his jaw, scratching absently at the stubble there. Because now all you could think about was how it would feel under your fingertips, under your lips, under—okay. Enough.
The magazine in your lap was technically open, fingers flipping through glossy pages filled with designer gowns and scandalous headlines. Normally, you'd be all over it, sipping coffee as you devoured the who wore what and who was caught with who. But today, you weren't really reading, you were just holding it, turning pages for the sake of it. Something to occupy your hands while you definitely didn't stare at Aaron.
He had started keeping these around after you mentioned, offhandedly, how much you loved them. You hadn't even meant it as a suggestion, but the next time you visited, there it was—sitting on the coffee table like it had always been there.
He hadn't spared you so much as a glance since you walked in—not even when you'd practically drifted past his desk, close enough that he should've felt you there. He had mumbled a good morning, sure, but his eyes never left the page, his attention locked onto whatever was in that file.
You sigh—loudly. Pointedly. The kind of exaggerated little huff that normally earns you at least a glance, maybe even a what's the matter, sweetheart?  There was no reaction today. He just flipped another page, one hand smoothing over the text, the other tapping against the desk like you were completely invisible.
You toss the magazine onto the table—just a little too hard. Then you stretch out on the couch, shifting just enough that his button-down rides up, baring more of your thighs than should be considered decent. The air against your skin makes you hyperaware of what isn't there—only your favorite panties. The tiniest scrap of fabric between you and absolute obscenity. If he so much as glanced in your direction, he'd have the perfect view. But he doesn't.
You sigh again, softer this time, just enough to sound absentminded, like you're not trying to get his attention (even though you absolutely are). As you push yourself off the couch, you stretch a little, giving yourself an extra moment to watch him. You make your way toward him, steps slow, letting the hem of his shirt brush against the tops of your thighs as you move. His fingers flex against the page.
You settle against the edge of his desk, bracing yourself on your elbows, making a very intentional point of pressing your tits together. It's the kind of thing that should be subtle—just a natural consequence of your posture.
Months of Aaron have taught you more than just the way he takes his coffee or how he organizes his files. You've studied him—memorized him even. And one thing has become crystal clear:
He's absolutely a boob man.
You realized it gradually—the subtle stiffening of his posture whenever you leaned a little too close in the office, the way his fingers flexed when your blouse had just a bit too much give.
Then, when you started dating, it became even clearer. His hands never just grabbed—they claimed, like he was making up for all the times he couldn't touch.
His voice would go low, reverent, when he murmured, so pretty, sweetheart, his thumb brushing over your skin like he needed to feel it. And your bras—he had thoughts about those, much to your surprise. Which ones were his favorite. Which ones he hated because they got in the way.
But it wasn't until months later—when he had you spread out beneath him, his mouth hot and urgent against your skin—that he admitted it. His voice was rough, breathless, his grip tightening as he groaned, been trying so fucking hard not to look at these for years. And then, just to prove it, his mouth sealed over you like he had years to make up for.
"Do you need anything? Water? Coffee? Maybe lunch?"
His eyes lift—quick, practiced, almost indifferent.
Almost.
Because before they settle back down, they pause, just for a fraction of a second, right there. Right at the collar of his button-down, where the top buttons are hanging loose, where your skin is warm and soft and practically begging for attention.
But then, before you can revel in it, he's already looking back down. "No, I'm fine, sweetheart."
You bite your lip, actually contemplating throwing his stupid case file out the window. He's either knows what you're trying to accomplish and ignoring you on purpose or he's just that focused. You weren't sure which was worse.
You shove off the desk, but you don't step away. Instead, you step closer. Your hands find his shoulders first, sliding down to his chest as you lean into him, pressing against his back. The shift is immediate. He goes still, his spine going ramrod straight, like his brain has just caught up to what's happening.
Your shirt is paper-thin, your nipples are pressed right against him, and unless he's suddenly gone completely numb, he feels it.
You sink against him, letting your chin rest on his shoulder, breathing him in. Gods, he smells good. Clean, sharp, like something expensive.
You recognized it as the cologne you bought him. The one you picked, the one you dabbed on his wrist in the middle of a department store and grinned, telling him, This. This smells like you. This is the one.
Your fingers skim over his collar, your nails just barely catching against the heat of his skin.
"What are you working on?" You let the question drip from your lips, your voice all honey, sweet, but not innocent.
Aaron hums low in his throat. "Case notes."
"That's boring. Is there anything I can do to help? Your assistant is very willing to be of service."
His fingers pause and your stomach flips. But then, before you can savor it, he moves. His hand finds yours, slow, gentle, lifting it with patience. He presses a kiss to your knuckles, featherlight, frustratingly chaste, before setting your hand back down like you're some good little thing that's been successfully pacified. And then you catch it, the tiniest twitch of his lips.
"Thank you, honey, but I've got it under control."
You make a noise, half scoff, half petulant whine, and shift your chin against his shoulder, angling yourself just enough to shoot him a pointed glare. "You always say that. What's the point of having such a capable assistant if you're not going to use her?"
"Hmm. So that's what you want? For me to use you?"
"I don't know. Is that an option?"
Aaron's laugh is low, the kind that rumbles through his chest without much warning. It's never loud—it doesn't have to be—but it still manages to send your stomach into a ridiculous free-fall.
"There's just some stuff I need to finish up."
You groan, letting your forehead drop to his shoulder, arms squeezing around him like you can physically hold his attention. Like you can will it away from the pages in front of him and back to you where it belongs.
"Is that your way of telling me I just have to sit here and be patient?"
Aaron's pen doesn't pause. "Mhm."
You huff. "And you think I'll be able to do that?"
His answer is immediate. Too immediate.
"You've survived this long," he says, and you swear you can hear the smirk in his voice. "I think you'll manage."
"Fine," you say after a moment, stepping around the chair before sinking into his lap, giving him plenty of time to stop you, but he doesn't. He never does.
You shift until you're settled, one leg draped over his, chest brushing his. His breath stutters—just a little, just enough to tell you that he feels you. His fingers flex against the desk, pressing harder into the wood, tension rolling through his back as he goes perfectly still beneath you, like he's waiting to see what you'll do next.
"What are you doing?"
"Nothing," you hum, arms draping easily over his shoulders as you sink against him. Your cheek brushes his, lips just close enough that if he turned his head, just a little, you'd be right there. "You said you had to finish working. Don't let me stop you."
A slow inhale, a slight tilt of his head, then—his pen moves again, like nothing's changed. Like you haven't changed anything. You exhale against his skin, hiding your smirk in the crook of his neck, fingers idly tracing slow, featherlight circles along the nape of it. He's humoring you, and that's fine.
You let him pretend for a while, content to exist in the space between distraction and indulgence. You shift in his lap, weight pressing into his just enough.
His body reacts before he does, muscles tightening, his breath slowing like he's thinking too hard about not reacting.
"Sit still."
"I am still," you reply, the words light on your tongue, but the slow curve of your hips tells another story.
"Sweetheart."
You lean in, close enough that your noses brush, your forehead pressing to his as your lips part ever so slightly. "What? I'm not doing anything."
Aaron's breath comes out sharp, ragged, the sound scraping its way from his throat like he's been holding onto it for too long. His chest pushes against yours, every inhale pressing you closer, every exhale heating the space between you. He leans back, just enough to create the smallest sliver of distance.
You roll your hips again, slower this time, savoring the friction that sends a shudder through you, tightening every muscle in your body with anticipation. The feeling sparks through you, sharp and intoxicating, sending heat pooling in your stomach. His reaction was subtle, the shift of his jaw, his hand brushing against the desk, like he doesn't trust himself to touch you yet.
His gaze drops, heavy-lidded, to where your bodies fit together, the rise and fall of your breath syncing with his.
His hands land on your hips, thumbs pressing in, not enough to stop you, just enough to remind you he could if he wanted to. When his eyes meet yours again, there's no rush, no immediate reaction. You knew exactly what it meant and what usually followed, he was just waiting for the moment you tip the scales too far.
"Do you want to tell me what exactly it is you're trying to do?" he asks, his voice low, the kind of tone that makes you forget your own name for a second.
You push against him again, grinding just enough to feel the press of him, the heat of him, and god. His fingers dig in—tight—like he's trying to stop you, but you don't miss the way his breath catches, the way his grip falters for half a second. Your fingers curl into his shirt, and suddenly, you can't remember what your original plan was.
You shift forward, your body molding to his, your breath fanning against his skin as your lips brush his ear. Your teeth scrape, light, but not accidental.
"I'm just feel a little... overlooked." Your fingers tighten where they rest, nails digging in just enough to make sure he feels it. "Is it so bad that I want your attention?"
His grip tightens, harder this time, his fingers digging into your hips with a kind of warning you'd be stupid to ignore. The heat of his palms seeps through the thin fabric of his shirt, scorching into your skin like a brand.
"You have my attention." You don't believe him. Not really. You press your lips into a pout, brow furrowing just slightly. "But if you keep moving like that, I might now be so nice about it."
Your hips shift, an instinctive little squirm, testing to see if you can push past his hold. You can't. "I can't help it."
"You can't help it?" he repeats, almost thoughtful, like he's turning the idea over in his mind. "I think you can. You just don't want to."
You want to argue, you really do, but nothing comes out, only a sharp inhale that never quite makes it into words. Because he's right. He knows he's right.
The little noise that escapes your throat is purely instinctual, frustrated but breathy, like your body is already conceding before your mind catches up.
"I told you to stop," he murmurs, but the way it sinks into you, the way it wraps around your ribs like something stretched too tight, tells you exactly what kind of trouble you're in.
He mirrors you, crowding in, his breath skimming your ear. His palm presses into the small of your back, slotting you back into place. "But you don't listen, do you?"
You shake your head without even meaning to, the deafening roar of your pulse making it impossible to think clearly.
"No, you don't," he murmurs, his tone dipping lower, turning darker, more intimate. His hands flex as if to remind you of the control he holds. Then his lips graze your jaw, his breath fanning over your skin. "You push. You test the boundaries. And then you pretend to be shocked when I hold you to them."
His fingers slide down, dragging over your thigh with an almost excruciating slowness. He pauses to squeeze there.
"First, you sprawled out on the couch—" his thumb sweeps over your skin, "like you didn't know exactly how that would look."
Your breath stutters, catches, knots itself into something tangled and messy as his hand moves, sliding higher, pressing firmer, stopping just shy of where the ache blooms.
His eyes darken, the heat behind them smoldering with something deep, something that settles like fire in the pit of your stomach.
"Then you leaned over my desk, practically shoving these—" His hand moves before the words fully land, cupping the curve of your breast. His thumb rolls over your nipple. "—right in my face."
Your breath catches, your hips lifting, your thighs parting like you're meant to be touched. Like you need him there. But he doesn't give in. He just moves lower, slow and taunting, until his palm covers the heat between your legs, pressing lightly over the thin fabric of your panties.
His fingers flex, testing. Feeling.
"And now this," he murmurs, and gods, his voice, his voice, is like a razor wrapped in velvet, smooth and cutting all at once. "You squirm and pout like you don't know exactly what you're doing. But I know better, don't I?"
The words settle in your spine, and suddenly, you don't feel like you know what you're doing. Like you're the one pulling at a thread you don't quite understand, but it's already too late to stop. A shiver rolls through you, bone-deep, leaving your muscles lax, your body melting into his like you were always meant to be here.
"I'm sorry," you murmur so quietly, you're not even sure if he hears it. "I just... I wanted you to notice me."
Aaron's hum is low, deep, almost amused. His thumb finds your jaw, sweeping along the curve of it as he tilts your chin up, forcing you to meet his eyes.
"Oh, I noticed you. I always notice you. In fact, you're all I ever notice." His hand slips away from where you want it most. "But if this is the only way you know how to ask for my attention, sweetheart, then I think we have a problem."
Your grip on his shirt is useless, you're clinging to him, to anything, but he's the one in control. His hands settle on your hips, demanding, guiding you over the hard line of his cock, forcing you to take the friction, to feel every inch of him through the layers still between you.
The friction is blinding, sending heat licking up your spine, setting every nerve in your body on fire. Your legs tremble, a sharp, choked sound escaping before you can stop it, and you clutch at his shoulders, nails sinking deep into muscle as pleasure coils tight and insistent in your belly.
"Aaron," his name slips from your lips, high and uneven, like it costs something to say it. Your head bows, forehead pressing into his shoulder, hands trembling against his chest. "I wasn't trying to be bad. I just... I didn't know what else to do."
"No, sweetheart," he murmurs. "You didn't think, did you? And now look where that's gotten you."
His words should sting, but they don't, not when his hands are so gentle, smoothing down your spine like he's soothing something raw inside you. And then his voice, warm and promising, settles over you, "But I'll take care of you now."
And gods, you need him to. He's so hard, the thick length of him pressing against you through denim and cotton, teasing, tormenting. Everything burns—your skin, your stomach, that deep, pulsing ache between your thighs. Your head swims, feverish, your mind caught between more and please and I can't take this. But he knows. Of course, he knows.
"Do you feel that?"
"Yes."
"Good. If you want to keep going, you'll take care of it. Go ahead."
Your hands move with the kind of urgency that betrays just how badly you need this, need him. Your fingers trail down, brushing over the tight muscles of his stomach, and it's almost enough to make you dizzy, just touching him, just knowing what's waiting for you beneath layers of fabric.
The button of his jeans fumbles beneath your fingers before finally popping open. And then you're pulling him free. He's thick in your hand, burning hot against your palm, and something about that, about feeling him like this, for you, makes something feral sink its teeth into you.
And then he finds you.
His fingers slip under your panties, gliding through the obscene slickness there, and you don't mean to react so violently, don't mean to moan so loud, but it rips out of you before you can stop it.
"Oh, honey," Aaron murmurs, almost thoughtful, like he's just now realizing the full extent of your undoing. "I didn't realize you'd gotten this worked up."
Like it's an observation. Like it's fascinating.
His fingers push, stretching you open, teasing just the right spot, and you jerk against him with a sharp, strangled moan. Your grip around him tightens, your strokes turning sloppy, uneven, desperate.
"Aaron—" His name tumbles out high and needy, your head tipping back, eyes fluttering shut.
"I didn't mean to—" Your voice shakes, a hitched little gasp tangled between syllables. "I just—" Your breath stutters, heat climbing, overwhelming. "I didn't know what to do."
"You don't have to know what to do." His fingers slow just enough to let you catch his breath as he murmurs. "You just have to let me take over. That's what you wanted, wasn't it?"
Your nod is frantic, almost mindless, as his words echo in your ears.
"Please." It falls from your lips like a confession, like you'd say anything if it means he'll give you what you want.
His fingers thrust deeper, and the shock of it rips a gasp from your lips, straight into his kiss. It's messy, frantic, all clashing mouths and stolen air, your breaths coming too fast to match his, like you're afraid if you let him go for even a second, he'll pull away.
Your grip on him tightens without thinking, your fingers flexing around his cock, but the sensation barely registers now, drowned out by the wetness pooling between your thighs, the slick drag of his fingers against your walls.
You can't keep up. You're chasing something that feels just out of reach, your hands leaving his cock, fumbling for something solid, something real. They find his face, fingertips brushing over the rough stubble of his jaw, trying to find yourself in him, in the way he's ruining you.
You kiss him like you can tell him everything that way, like he might understand the ache better through lips and tongues and the way your body trembles under his hands.
And then—he stops. His fingers slip free, and the sound you make is a whine, a protest, your hips tilting, seeking, trying to drag him back in. But he doesn't move, doesn't give you what you need, just smirks against your lips like he enjoys watching you squirm.
"You're so impatient," he murmurs against your lips.
But before you can protest, before you can tell him that yes, yes, you am impatient, please just give it to me, his hands tighten on your hips. And then—oh.
He lifts you, positioning you just right, and then, lowers you down.
The head of his cock pushes inside, and your breath catches, lips parting in a broken gasp. The stretch is devastating, inch by inch forcing your body to open, to yield to him. He's so deep, impossibly deep, and for a second, you forget how to breathe, how to think, your only thought being how does he even fit?
It feels endless, your thighs shaking against his as he takes his time, forcing you to feel every slow, torturous inch. Your body clenches around him, your nails dragging over his scalp as you bury your face against his neck.
"Breathe," he murmurs, voice thick, lips grazing your temple. "That's it. Let me take care of you. You just have to let me in, sweetheart."
"Okay, okay," you whisper, voice shaky as you bury your face against his neck, arms wrapping tighter around him.
His other hand moves, dragging up your spine before wrapping around your waist. And then—he presses deeper.
The air leaves your lungs in a sharp, punched-out gasp. He doesn't stop, doesn't let you breathe, just sinks in, stretching you open until he's fully seated inside you. Until there's nowhere left to go.
"That's it," he groans, voice tight, his mouth ghosting along your jaw. "So tight. So warm. Fuck, sweetheart, you know this is what you were made for, don't you?"
You try to think of something, something teasing, something bratty, something that might tip him over the edge, but your body betrays you, trembling around him, squeezing down so tight you feel him shudder.
"God, you're tight," he mutters, his fingers pressing into your hips, hard enough to leave bruises. "I can feel every little tremble, every squeeze. You feel that, sweetheart? How perfectly you fit around me?"
"It's like you don't want to let me go. Is that what you want, honey? To keep me right here?"
Your body clenches down instinctively, like you're answering him without meaning to, and his breath catches for just a second before his lips curve against your skin. You nod, frantic, a little dazed, a little wrecked, and his chuckle is pure sin.
"Good. Because I'm not going anywhere."
He pulls back just enough to create the kind of unbearable friction that makes your breath catch, your body tightening like a bowstring.
"Every little sound you make drives me insane." His breath drags over your cheek, his lips just shy of touching, like he's teasing himself as much as he is you. "Do you even realize what you do to me?"
You try to answer, you really do, but your lungs don't work properly anymore, your body focused on the pleasure threatening to snap at any second. Your fingertips tremble against his shoulders, your thighs quiver, and Aaron knows exactly what that means.
"That's it. I can feel you trembling, sweetheart. You're so close, aren't you?"
His words strike something deep, something primal, and the fire curling between your thighs roars in response. Your head tips back, your breath breaking apart as your hands scramble for purchase, fingers sliding to his face, thumbs brushing over the roughness of his jaw. You pull him into a kiss that's all hunger, all desperation, your lips parting to let him devour you.
He groans into your mouth, a sound that vibrates through your chest, and then his hips snap up into you. The stretch is suffocating, the sheer fullness of him sending sharp pulses of pleasure up your body with every deep thrust.
"I've got you," he murmurs against your lips. "You don't have to hold back. Just let go for me, sweetheart."
It crashes into you harder than you expected, knocking the breath straight from your lungs. Your moan catches halfway, tumbling out in pieces as your body convulses, clenches tight, gripping him in a way that makes him hiss through his teeth.
He thrusts deep, brutal, final, and then he's gone, his head dropping back as a groan tears from his chest.
He fills you in thick, pulsing waves, each pulse making your thighs tighten around him, making you gasp at how deep it settles. The feeling is overwhelming—the heat of him, the weight, the way his cock still twitches inside you, like he’s unwilling to let a single drop go to waste.
You're not sure where your body ends and his begins, your limbs heavy, useless, boneless as you slump against him. Your breath stutters, still uneven, every exhale pushing against his chest as the last waves of pleasure roll through you.
"You take every drop so fucking well," he murmurs. "Meant to keep you full."
His fingers press into your hips, just a little tighter, just enough to make you feel how deep he still is.
"Don’t move yet."
Your breath stutters, the words landing deep, something fluttering tight in your stomach.
"Just a little longer," he murmurs, his hands absently smoothing up and down your spine. His voice drops, lower, rougher—
"I want to make sure it sticks."
You shudder, pressing closer, your face tucking against his neck as everything—the fullness, every drop of his cum—settles in.
Aaron exhales, his chest rising beneath you, and suddenly, he shifts. His grip on your hips soften and slide up, like he can feel the way you're trembling against him. 
"Breathe, sweetheart," he murmurs. "You can do that for me, can't you?"
You try, you really do, but when you inhale, it's a stuttering, gasping thing, barely controlled. Your thighs still shake, your body still throbs around him, and you can feel the way he exhales, like he enjoys this—enjoys feeling you like this, soft and trembling in his arms.
"Easy," he murmurs. One hand slides up your spine, cupping the back of your head, fingers threading into your hair. "That was a lot."
You nod—or, at least, you think you do. Everything feels floaty, light, warm. Your head feels like it's filled with pink clouds. Your limbs feel soft, useless, like you're some well-loved doll that's been played with for hours.
He tilts your chin up, catching your gaze.
"You okay?" His brow furrows slightly, his thumb brushing over your cheekbone.
You blink slowly at him, lips parting, trying to focus.
"Mhm," you hum, then pause, frowning just slightly. "Wait, no—hold on."
His jaw tenses immediately, but you reach up, poking his cheek with a weak, clumsy finger.
"You didn't kiss me," you mumble, like it's the most important fact in the universe. "You're supposed to kiss me after, 'cause, like, you love me and all that."
Hotch lets out a slow breath, like he's holding something back. His head tilts, just barely shaking, like he's in mild disbelief of you. And okay, fine, maybe you do say a lot of dumb things. But this wasn't dumb. It was valid. It was scientifically proven that post-sex cuddles should include at least one (1) I love you and one (1) kiss, and you were simply holding him accountable.
"Of course I love you," he murmurs, like the answer is so obvious, so unquestionable, that it almost makes you feel silly for asking. And then he kisses you.
It's deep, drawn-out, the kind of kiss that makes you forget where you are. 
You're still in his lap, still tangled in the ridiculous, oversized leather chair, but you don't feel like you're anywhere. Not in his apartment, not even in your own body. Just floating, existing in between his lips and yours.
When you finally pull back, it's not even voluntary—just the sad, unfortunate reality of needing air.
"Wow," you murmur, your fingers lazily brushing over his jaw.
"Wow?"
"Mhm." Your tongue darts out, sweeping over the kiss-swollen curve of your bottom lip, like you're trying to catch what's left of him there, trying to savor it. "Like... I feel very wow."
A smirk tugs at his lips, but his hands don't stop moving, don't stop tracing, don't stop feeling. His fingers smoothed absently over your hips, up your spine, his palms blending into your skin. Like he's checking for something. Like he's making sure you're here with him.
And for a second, you think he's about to kiss you again. He looks like he wants to, his gaze flickers to your lips, his hands flex just slightly, his body leans in just a hair. But then his gaze flickers, his lips part slightly as if he'd just remembered something.
"You said something earlier."
You blink again, brain lagging behind slightly as reality creeps back in, still floating somewhere in bliss. Which you felt was a more pressing topic than whatever he's about to say.
Your face scrunches up immediately, like maybe if you look cute enough, he'd drop it. 
"I said a lot of things earlier," you rush out, voice a little too high, a little too hasty, your hand flapping vaguely in the air. "So many things. A real stream of nonsense, actually. I was just saying words, you know, as one does—"
You shift slightly, suddenly painfully aware of the position you're in, and he doesn't even blink.
"Aaron," you say, narrowing your eyes. "You're literally still inside me and you want to have a conversation right now?"
"Yes," he says simply, like of course he does, like this is completely reasonable, like you aren't still wrapped around him, skin warm and sticky from what you just did.
His brows furrow slightly, and his head tilts in that very specific way that means he's already pulling apart the words, unraveling them like a thread, and working through them with that brain of his before you can even begin to take it back. 
"You said you felt overlooked," he states plainly, like a fact, which you guessed it was. "If that was something you just said in the moment, we can drop it."
His eyes narrow, studying you like he already knows the answer. "But if you meant it, then I want to understand why."
Your mouth parts, ready to push out something easy, something light, something that won't lead to the very real, very terrifying act of actually admitting things.
He was serious. Not angry or annoyed. Just serious. And concerned.
You exhale, suddenly very invested in dragging your nails lightly over his chest, watching the way they disappear into the fabric of his shirt, how his muscles shift slightly beneath your touch.
"I mean... it's not a thing," you mumble, barely glancing up. "More like a thing-adjacent."
"Sweetheart." The firmness in his voice made your stomach flip. It's not a scolding or a warning, just his way of making you hear him. "I'm not interested in whether you think it's a thing or not. I'm interested in whether it's true."
"I mean, I guess... maybe a little."
His fingers flex, like he's taking that in. He nods once, slowly. "That makes sense."
Your brows furrow. "It does?"
"Yes," he states plainly, like it's obvious. "You pick up on subtle changes—even the ones I don't intend to project. And when I get hyper focused on something, I shut everything else out. Not just you. Everyone."
"It's a defense mechanism. A way to compartmentalize. It doesn't mean I don't notice you. It means my brain assigns the highest level of urgency to the task at hand, and everything else—everything outside of that—is temporarily shut out."
"When I do that, it makes sense that you would feel like I'm not paying attention to you," he continues. "Because in those moments I'm not."
Your breath catches. He says it so matter-of-factly, so plainly, that it almost doesn't sting at first, it just lands.
His grip tightens ever so slightly where his hands rest on your like he already knows how you're taking it.
"But that doesn't mean I don't want to be paying attention," he murmurs, fingers brushing slow, absentminded circles against your skin. "It doesn't mean you don't exist in the back of my mind, even when I'm caught up in something else."
Aaron leans in a fraction, his eyes holding yours.
"Do you know what I did last night after you fell asleep?" he asks.
You blink. "Uh... sleep?"
He smirks. "Eventually. But first, I checked the thermostat. You always get cold at night, even when you say you won't."
Your face warms. "That's just—,"
"And before I left for work last week, I moved your car closer to the building because I saw you left your umbrella at my place."
"I—,"
"And when I'm out of town, do you know what I do every morning?"
You swallow.
"No."
"I think about what you're having for breakfast," he murmurs. "Not consciously. It's not something I try to do. It just... happens."
"You always eat something sweet," he continues, his thumb brushing over your jaw. "It's usually a pastry or something covered in chocolate. Sometimes cake, if we're being honest."
Your scrunch your nose again and he smiles.
"So, tell me," he murmurs, tilting your chin up. "Does that sound like someone who overlooks you?"
Your lips part but nothing comes out. Your heart aches—not the bad kind, but the kind that makes your chest feel too small for everything inside it. Because he's right. He notices everything. Not in the big, showy romance-movie ways but in the little things. In ways that matter.
You inhale a little too hard, blinking quickly, but the stinging in your eyes isn't going anywhere.
Aaron sees it immediately. "Sweetheart."
You shake your head quickly, sniffling.
"I'm not crying," you announce, even though your voice cracks on the last word, which kind of ruins the effect.
He smirks. "Are you sure?"
"Yes," you say firmly, poking his chest. "I just—I feel very loved and now I have to process that."
"Okay," he murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Do you need time to process, or should I just assume you're going to be attached to me for the foreseeable future?"
Your smile is instant, automatic, the kind that takes over your whole face before you can even think about stopping it. Your arms tighten around his neck, fingers curling into his shirt like you have any intention of letting go.
"Oh no, you're definitely stuck with me," you declare. "Like, you might need to call someone if you ever actually want me to let go."
His smirk is instant. "You're saying I should alert the authorities?"
You nod sagely. "I mean, that would be the responsible thing to do. But by the time they arrive, I'll have already made a compelling argument about how you should just let it happen."
Aaron huffs a quiet laugh, shaking his head. "I'm sure you would."
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taglist: @readergf @edencherries @aurorsworld @princess76179 @malindacath @broadwaytraaaaash @sunfyyre @sleepysongbirdsings @trulycayla @crouchingapple @navia3000 @aaronlovesava @bakugocanstompme @pansexualhailstorm @averyhotchner @looking1016 @everythinglizzy @sky2nd @alexxavicry @spencerssatchel @candyd1es @storiesofsvu @pleasantgardenwitch @kodzukenmaa @hiireadstuff @dilflover-3 @spennciesslut @phoenix-le-danseur-de-pole @jstcln @just-here-to-read13 @c-losur3 @wondergal2001 @oliver-1270 @ssahotchbabe @savagemickey03 @justanotherbimboslxt @imoonkiss @estragos @khxna @de-duchess @raysmayhem-72 @piinksdoll @justyourusualash @whimsicalpolitical @kcch-ns @cool-light32 @reidfile @sugarbutterbailey @ssamorganhotchner @persephonestears @moonyxstars @spookyysinsanity @proxxyshouse @spoolsofgreenspoolsofblack @imsonotweird @jungchloe @she-wont-miss @duchesz @may-machin99 @historicallyweirdandqueer @in-the-kosmos @lcvealwayss @p13rc3-th3-m4tt13 @babyhoneybyhs @reire11
taglist is closed for now until i can figure out the best way to include more than 50 mentions :(
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avionvadion · 2 days ago
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This Trey discourse is getting ridiculous.
Tell me you don’t understand the dream without telling you don’t understand the dream. Tell me you don’t like Trey or understand his character without telling me you don’t like Trey or understand his character. For starters, the reason most of the fandom disliked Trey early on- book one. He didn’t stand up to Riddle’s mother or stop Riddle from being a tyrant.
Argument one: he was a child. A ten year old child whose parents were being screamed at for five hours straight (something of which BOTH Idia and Leona are horrified by, and those two had some strict upbringings themselves) while listening to eight year old Riddle wailing and sobbing for his mother to stop. That shit is traumatizing. Have you ever been screamed at unjustly as a kid? It’s terrifying. It haunts you. That kind of memory latches on and never lets go. Not without help.
Argument two: Trey is 18. He is a big brother. Not a parent. He didn’t raise his little siblings either, as his parents have a seemingly good relationship with each other and their children. He hasn’t seen Riddle in years, and while excited to see Riddle at the entrance ceremony he was quickly rebuffed by the now cold and steely Riddle who grew up under his abusive mother’s rule. He and Cater then worked with Riddle to dethrone their horrible then-dorm leader, and Trey was then sacrificed to the position of vice dorm leader because the entire dorm took a vote. Still, he did his best as vice dorm leader- not wanting to lose his head or watch their dorm mates stumble accidentally onto the execution block.
Trey, at the start, wasn’t particularly close to Riddle because Riddle wouldn’t let him be, and as someone who was traumatized by what happened when he WAS A CHILD likely struggled to speak up against Riddle’s harsher rules, and that most likely muddled together with Trey’s wish for Riddle to be happy. Going against Riddle would lead to conflict, and Riddle is short tempered as is. Trey likely believed that standing up to Riddle would make things worse instead of better.
He learns quickly from Adeuce later in book one how wrong he was, but that’s beside the point. The best Trey could do in the position HE DID NOT WANT was to give advice to his dorm mates and attempt to be Riddle’s voice of reason, acting as the peacemaker and struggling to keep any situation from escalating.
Something of note here, that I find particularly fascinating, is that it’s been stated by several characters that Riddle’s reign, though tyrannical, was nowhere near as bad as the last dorm leader- who was chaos incarnate. That plays a part in why Trey and Cater both were so willing to go along with Riddle’s iron ruling, even though both knew he was going about being dorm leader the wrong way.
There was no controlling or manipulating of Riddle- despite what Leona and Idia, who have ZERO CONNECTION AND INTERACTION with Trey and Cater prior to this dream, believed. There was no stopping Riddle, either. The best they could do was appease him and keep him calm.
Now, onto his dream.
We learn that Trey and his family “laugh” about what happened with Mrs. Rosebitch. This isn’t an, “oh they weren’t affected by what happened” situation, it’s an, “oh they were so badly affected by what happened that they can’t even talk about it properly because it’s so fucked up that they just laugh instead”. That’s called a trauma response. That trauma is so deeply rooted in Trey because he’s never learned to process it, that it’s there in his dream instead of being omitted.
Trey is also dreaming of a world in which Riddle has no stressful responsibilities. They’re at school, but his mother can’t reach him there, and Chen’ya- a childhood friend of Trey’s who was THERE when the Clover family got screamed at by Mrs. Rosebitch- is dorm leader instead. Riddle is not held down by what happened, and is seemingly “freed” from his mother’s cruel hand. Heartslabyul has become a safe space.
One built by Trey and Chen’ya, something they had unknowingly tried to do as children for Riddle (as they were unaware of the abuse, but had been a shining light for sweet baby Riddle who lived in the suffocating darkness) but failed- and paid severely for it.
Now, onto Fandom problem number two: the Round Bois.
I’m seeing people call Trey a “feeder” and are behaving harshly towards him because of it. But that literally couldn’t be farther from what’s happening. For example, let us take a look at his conversation with Vil (I brought my freaking receipts; this boy is my FAV of Heartslabyul) during Vil’s lab coat vignette.
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We know Trey likes to bake.
He bakes for the Heartslabyul parties, and often gives Adeuce pastries to bring to Ramshackle to share with Yuu. But we learn in his New Years vignette that he bakes as a form of stress relief, too, to work his thoughts out and/or distract himself. It is a comfort to him. A safe space. And he knows whatever makes he will likely bring a smile to someone’s face. He enjoys baking, and he enjoys seeing people enjoy his sweets.
If someone is stressed, he encourages them to eat sweets- or cake with lots fruits, though that’s specific in this vignette because he just made a strawberry cake and was trying to find someone to give it to because it was one cake too many, lol, and Vil happened to be stressed out from something Rook said.
Trey isn’t being a “feeder” here or in his dream. He saw someone stressed and went, “Hey, I have a solution, why not try it? One slice won’t hurt and it’ll make you feel better/put you in a better mood.”
Baking is Trey’s solution, and a reliable source of comfort. He likes seeing how happy people are from the things he bakes, and he knows eating sweets can make other people happy. That’s why he goes out of his way to find someone to give the extra cake he accidentally made to- because it’ll put that person in a good mood and the cake will have a “good home” to go to.
Trey’s dream was basically giving Riddle and their other dorm mates a life where they could be happy and enjoy themselves without fear. A safe space. He could bake to his heart’s content in this massive kitchen his dream Heartslabyul provided, and everyone around him are happy and overall stress-free.
The reason they’re all ROUND BOIS???
It’s not because Trey was a “feeder” and fed them to that point, it’s because the dream-versions of his friends lacked self control and there was no one to stop them from eating sweet after sweet after sweet. They just happily ate whatever it was Trey baked, because he baked a lot- not to “feed” them, but because baking is something he greatly enjoys doing.
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theballadofharkness · 2 days ago
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Housewarming Part 2
Part 1
Pairing: Agatha Harkness X fem!reader
Summary: After the housewarming is over, you have the opportunity to discover just what Agatha said to Jen and show Agatha just how much you belong to her 💜
Word Count: 3.3K
Warnings: smut warning, fingering and oral (Agatha receiving) and some hurt/comfort!
A/N: this is my first written smut so some feedback would be hugely appreciated my loves 💜🪻 and as always MDNI
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The quiet of the room was intoxicating, the kind of calm that only came after the chaos of a party. Agatha’s house had emptied out hours ago, the last of the coven members waving their goodbyes and leaving behind a feeling of emptiness that only Agatha could fill. You lay next to her, nestled in the warmth of her arms. The bed was softer than you remembered, and the weight of Agatha’s presence next to you was like a protective shield. You still couldn’t quite believe you were here in her bed, now your bed, wrapped in her arms. You had moved in mere hours ago, something that still felt like a dream in moments like this. It was still a little strange to think of this as home, but with Agatha beside you, everything felt... right.
But there was something nagging at the back of your mind, something you had sensed but hadn’t quite been able to put into words. Agatha had been quieter than usual since the party, her playful teasing had been replaced with something more introspective and you could feel her usual confidence slip beneath the surface.
You shifted a little closer to her, humming softly as she stroked your cheek, you lifted your fingers to trace the veins of her hand where it rested against you. "Agatha," you murmured, your voice soft, "what exactly did you say to Jennifer before she left?"
The way Agatha tensed immediately let you know you’d hit on something. Her gaze flickered briefly toward the ceiling, and for a moment, her lips quirked into that trademark, wry smile. But it didn’t reach her eyes.
"What did you hear?" she asked, her voice low and almost teasing, but there was an edge to it, a quiet tension beneath the words.
You bit your lip, hesitating for a moment. You hadn’t meant to make her feel uncomfortable, but the question had been eating at you. "I don’t know, just... the way they looked at me when they were leaving. And when you spoke to Jen before she left… It didn’t seem like the kind of conversation you’d want overheard."
Her expression shifted. Her eyes narrowed, her jaw set in a way that was unmistakable.
Agatha’s lips quirked into that knowing smile she was so famous for, but there was a sharpness in her gaze now, something possessive. "You noticed that, did you?" She sat up, her posture shifting, an edge to her voice that made your heart skip. "Well, I overheard them too."
You lifted your head, your brows furrowing. "What did they say?"
Agatha paused, when she finally spoke, it was slow, deliberate, as if weighing the words. "They were talking about you, sweetheart," she said, her tone shifting into something possessive. "Said you were beautiful, sweet... said someone like you could have anyone. They wished they could have seduced you before I had a chance to”
Your eyes widened in shock as you felt a flutter in your chest. You had no idea that Jen and Alice felt that way about you, and you certainly hadn't encouraged them. But before you could respond, Agatha continued.
"They said that a young witch as gorgeous and sweet as you would eventually leave me for someone younger," Agatha said, her voice dripping with venom at the sour memory. "That you would eventually get bored and leave me. They were pretty sure of it, actually."
Your stomach twisted, a rush of protectiveness sweeping over you as your heart ached hearing her say those words. They cut deeper than you’d expected. You knew Agatha had a reputation, a history, and you knew she’d suffered because of it. You knew that her past with Rio and Wanda—both messy and broken in their own ways—had left scars on her heart that she never fully acknowledged. But hearing this, hearing that someone else thought you’d abandon her, hit harder than you’d realised.
"What? How could they think that?" you asked, frowning. "I’d never leave you, Agatha."
She leaned back against the headboard, her fingers absently drawing circles on your skin. "They don’t know you like I do," she said, her voice a little quieter now, less cocky, more reflective. There was a flicker of something vulnerable beneath her words, though she quickly masked it. "But I can’t help but wonder... maybe they’re right. Maybe someone like you... someone with so much life ahead of them... maybe I’m not enough."
"Agatha, there's nothing on earth that would stop me from loving you or wanting you," you said sincerely. "You're the center of my universe now, and I couldn't imagine being with anyone else."
Agatha's expression softened slightly at your words. It was rare to see her so uncertain, so vulnerable. Usually, she exuded confidence and self-assurance like it was second nature to her. But when it came to love, she was anything but. Agatha’s past relationships with Rio and Wanda had been difficult- complicated- and though she never admitted it, you knew they’d left scars. The way she’d been burned by those who couldn’t give her the kind of love she deserved made her protective of what she had now. And, in that moment, she was worried that, despite everything, you would slip away from her too.
You sat up, crawling into her lap so you could meet her gaze, refusing to let her hide behind her usual defences. "Agatha," you began, your voice firm with affection, "there’s nobody who could make me feel the way you do. You are enough. You’ve always been enough."
Agatha’s gaze softened slightly, but she didn’t speak right away. She looked away for a moment, as though considering your words, and you saw her shoulders relax, just a bit. Still, there was a trace of insecurity in her eyes, something that wasn’t easy for her to admit. You reached out, gently cupping her chin to make her meet your gaze again.
"I’m not some innocent young girl," Agatha said, her voice a little rougher now, like she was trying to convince herself of something. "I’m old, I’ve had my share of heartbreak, I’ve seen people leave, seen people betray me. Wanda… she never truly cared about me. And Rio? Well, that was a mess from the start. I always knew that, even if I didn’t want to admit it. You, though… You’re different. I know you could have anyone, and I know I’m not perfect. I’ve…” Her voice trailed off, and she blinked a few times, a flicker of something painful crossing her features “I’ve done some awful things."
You felt your heart break for her. You knew Agatha was strong, and you knew she never let anyone see her vulnerabilities. But right now, she was showing you a side of herself she rarely let anyone see. A side that wanted to be wanted, wanted to be loved in a way that didn’t end in pain.
You smiled gently, stroking her hair back from her face. “Agatha Harkness, I love you more than anything. No one could ever make me feel the way you do. No one could love me the way you do. You’re perfect just the way you are. Fuck the past, the only thing I care about is making you smile because you’re the person I want to wake up to for the rest of my life till the day I die. And nothing, and I mean nothing, will ever make me leave you. Not even death could take me away”
Agatha’s lips parted, as if she wanted to say something, but she was quiet for a moment, taking in your words. You saw the glint of doubt in her eyes, but you also saw something else- something that made you realise how deeply she needed to hear this. How much she needed to believe it. She had built so many walls around herself, but all it took was you, here, with her, to begin breaking them down.
Agatha’s eyes flickered down to your lips, then back to your eyes, searching for something. "I know you love me," she said softly, her tone low, almost hesitant. "But the last time I trusted someone, I lost them. And I... I don’t want to lose you."
You could hear the pain in her voice, the rawness beneath her confident exterior. Agatha was strong, but she had been hurt- deeply. Her power, her dominance, her unwavering authority- they all hid the vulnerability that lay beneath. And right now, that vulnerability was splayed out raw before you.
"Agatha," you whispered, your hand gently cupping her cheek again, pulling her closer. "I’m not going anywhere. I promise. You’re everything to me. You don’t have to worry about losing me. I’m not like them."
Her eyes searched yours, and for a long moment, neither of you spoke. Then, Agatha’s lips parted, and she pulled you towards her, her hands firm on your waist as she pressed her forehead to yours. You could feel the weight of her emotions in the air between you. The need for reassurance, the desperate desire for you to understand just how much she needed you.
Agatha’s hand slid around the back of your neck, her thumb caressing the sensitive skin there. She pulled you closer still , her lips hovering just above yours, her breath warm against your face. “I want to hear you say it,” she murmured, her voice hushed, almost possessive. “Tell me you belong to me.”
You smiled, a flutter of warmth spreading through your chest at the thought of Agatha seeking that reassurance from you. “I belong to you, Agatha. Only you. Forever.”
"Prove it," she murmured, her voice low but edged with that familiar cocky confidence that, despite everything, was still part of her. "Show me you’re mine."
You smiled softly, your heart swelling with affection. You hadn’t needed to be asked. You leaned forward, trailing soft kisses down her jaw, taking your time which was too much time in Agatha’s opinion. You stop your trail of kisses just shy of her lips, nuzzling the tip of your nose against hers. You smile as you feel Agatha cup your jaw and press your lips against hers. The kiss begins slow and sweet as a silent promise of forever, but quickly becomes more heated. You moan desperately against her as her tongue invades your mouth to try and taste every part of you. You wrap your arms around her neck to pull her impossibly close as her fingers dig into your hips, hard enough crescent bruises in their wake. She catches your bottom lip with her teeth, making you whine and roll your hips down against her.
When you finally pulled back, panting into each other's mouths, Agatha’s eyes were softer, warmer, but there was still a trace of that possessiveness there, that desire to keep you all to herself. You saw it, and you welcomed it. You were hers to command, to guide, but it was clear she was yours too. Completely.
"I’m yours, Agatha," you whispered, your hand caressing the side of her face. "Only you. Forever."
Agatha’s lips curled into that sly, knowing smile. The same smile that had once made everyone in the room quiver, but now, it was just for you. "That’s what I like to hear," she said, her voice more confident now. "You belong to me baby. And I’m not letting you go.” she added, her eyes studying you with an intensity that made your pulse quicken. Her words were both possessive and tender, a declaration that made your heart race.
“I belong to you, Agatha,” you whispered back, your voice steady with conviction. “Only you. Always.”
Agatha’s fingers dug gently into the fabric of your shirt as if she needed to ground herself in the reality of your words. She pulled back slightly, her dark eyes searching yours, looking for something, perhaps some final sign that you truly meant it.
Her lips found yours again, in a kiss that was slow, deliberate, like a promise. A promise that no matter what doubts plagued her, you were hers. The kiss deepened, but it wasn’t rushed this time. Agatha wasn’t in a hurry. She savoured it, as though needing to imprint this moment, this connection, into her soul.
When she pulled away, her lips brushed softly against your neck, the gentle touch of her breath sending a shiver down your spine. “I can’t lose you,” she said, her voice a quiet murmur. “You’re everything to me.”
You smiled, your fingers lightly trailing along her jawline. “You won’t,” you promised. “I’ll never leave you, Agatha. You have my heart.”
Her expression softened, and for a brief moment, all that lingering doubt seemed to fade away. You saw the woman beneath the confident, domineering witch—the one who longed to love and be loved without fear of rejection
"Prove it," she whispered suddenly, a sly smirk spreading across her lips.
You raised an eyebrow at her challenge but couldn't help but feel drawn into the game she was playing. Your lips met in a fierce kiss once more, addicted to the taste of one another, the air around you igniting with passion as Agatha began to take control. You melted into her touch, your lips parting to allow her tongue to claim yours. The kiss was deep and possessive, leaving no doubt as to who was in control here. You felt a shiver run down your spine as Agatha's hands roamed over your body, claiming every inch of skin as her own.
As you broke apart for a breath, chest heaving with exertion, Agatha’s eyes filled with a hunger that couldn't be denied as she whispered a soft command, "be a good girl and take care of me."
You nodded eagerly, feeling a surge of desire mixed with anticipation. You'd done this before, many times, but it never got old. You loved the way Agatha tasted, the way she responded to your touch. You gently nudged Agatha back onto the pillows, your mouth tracing a path down Agatha's neck, over her collarbone, and down to her breasts.
Agatha's hands wandered through your hair as she felt the soft caress of your lips on her skin. Her nipples hardened under the gentle touch, and she arched her back slightly, inviting more.
You continued your trail of kisses down Agatha's body, her fingers dancing over Agatha's hips and abdomen before coming to rest at the edge of her pubic bone. With a tender glance up at Agatha, you removed her purple lace panties, taking your time to run a finger through her wet folds, humming softly as you nuzzled closer between her thighs to taste the sweetness of her pussy.
In tune with Agatha’s body as ever, you silently answer her plea for more, you slip two fingers inside of her, humming contentedly against her sex as your fingers explore inside. You crook your fingers up and soon your lover is seeing stars as you press into that familiar spongy spot inside of her.
“That’s it baby, you’re doing so good for me," Agatha praised breathily, her long fingers threading through your hair to keep you exactly where she needed you.
Her praise given freely and wantonly lit a fire under you to have her teetering on the edge, your tongue sucking on her clit and your fingers doubled their efforts fucking in and out of her, hitting that perfect spot every time. Agatha whined pathetically as you removed your fingers, your tongue going from flicking over her bundle of nerves to teasing her hole.
“Shit- that’s it baby… fuck.. taste me, good girl that’s my good fucking girl” she babbled incoherently.
You barely registered her praise as you drowned in the taste of your lover, your thumb finding its way to her clit. Agatha’s back arched off the bed, hips cantering against your face as she lets out a loud and filthy moan. You could help but smile against her, gleeful that you had this kind of effect on Agatha.
“Fuck I love you” she gasped.
You pulled back from her pussy just enough to whimper back “Love you Aggie” before diving back down to run your tongue flat from her hole up to her sensitive bundle of nerves, moaning against her as her fingers tighten their grip on your hair.
It was after a particularly harsh suck of her clit that Agatha tugged your hair to pull your head back as her body twitched in overstimulation. “Shit baby” she panted softly, gazing down lovingly as you beamed up at her.
Her grin is feral as she pulls you up from between her thighs to capture your lips with hers. She licks into your mouth and moans as she tastes herself. Breaking away for air, you blush when you notice you’d smeared her slick on her own face. You reach over and wipe it away with your thumb, an act so soft compared to the filthy kiss you had just shared.
"You did so good for me," Agatha praised softly. Agatha let out a soft hum, pressing a lingering kiss to your lips before murmuring, “I love you, babygirl.”
You felt warmth bloom in your chest, a familiar ache that always came when she spoke to you like that- soft, reverent, as if you were the most precious thing in the world.
“I love you too,” you whispered, nestling yourself in her embrace.
She tightened her arms around you, her chin resting atop your head. “I can’t wait to start our life together. Waking up with you every morning, coming home to you every night… Just knowing you’re mine, here, always.”
You smiled, feeling your heart flutter at the thought. It was real now, you and her, together. No more separate spaces, no more longing at the end of the night when one of you had to leave. Just the two of you, one home, one life, entwined.
“Well,” you murmured, voice tinged with amusement, “we’ll see how you feel tomorrow when we finish unpacking the rest of my stuff.”
Agatha chuckled, the sound deep and rich, vibrating through your body where you lay against her. “Oh, kitten,” she said, pulling you even closer, “I’ve faced ancient magic, rival witches, and unspeakable horrors, but something tells me this might be my greatest challenge yet.”
You giggled softly, the sound muffled against her skin. “Told you.”
She sighed dramatically, but her lips found your forehead, lingering there in quiet devotion. “Doesn’t matter,” she murmured against your skin. “You’re worth it. Every single bit of it.”
Your heart clenched at her words, at the sincerity woven through them. You turned your face up to hers, pressing a soft kiss to her jaw before whispering, “Always?”
She looked down at you, eyes dark and filled with something fierce and eternal. “Forever, my love.”
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Took me a while because I literally did everyone lol, so here we have:
Obey me characters and their fashion styles Pt. 2
Holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shi- This is part 2 as there is the stupid 3 gifs/images per post limit
Pt 1.
Solomon
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Only has one proper fit in his closet that he put together everything else was bought and put together for him by Asmo
Has little interest in fashion and with the years blurring by in his human mind has lost track of what is actually fashionable so can't really dress properly outside of suit and tie events since there isn't much variations in that
Always in something that covers his body because he dislikes showing off his pact marks and whatever scars he has on his body
Despite this all his clothes are breathable and doesn't overheat him, he overheats often very easily and just uses magic to seem unbothered but he wears breathable clothing to avoid one more chore
Let him dress you and you'll come out looking like a damned hot mess never let him actually dress you, let him put in opinions and give out ideas but never let him actually dress you!
Diavolo
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On par with Lucifer with the fact that he can only dress formally properly as he's been having to do it forever
His difference is that casual clothing (on the rare occasions that is) is a mix of Lucifer's casual and Solomon's fashion sense because he doesn't get to dress casual often and refuses to let Barbatos find something suitable for him to wear
Really likes themed clothing though and will try and force Lucifer or even push Barbatos to wear matching clothing with him Mephibfrebchd wishes he could be like that with Diavolo
Compared to Solomon though Diavolo is more on the cringe leaning side and will gladly look like a pair of dads with Lucifer and wear Hawaiian shirts with khakis
Even with his bad fashion sense it's hard to make fun of him or even tell him it sucks because what do you mean you're gonna bully someone who rarely ever gets the freedom to be chill and choose his own stuff and rarely gets a chance to wear these crappy casual clothing? WHAT DO YOU MEAN??????
Let him dress you and you'll come out wearing some matching cringe shit with him, yes it's gonna be embarrassing but on the bright side not only did the King of Hell dress you but you're matching with him! Anyone who makes fun of you is also making fun of the king so they better get ready to grovel for forgiveness
Barbatos
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The king of formal wear
Despite this he does know how to dress casual and for any event and how to not look weird either
He has to as he dresses Diavolo and has been taking care of him from since forever
He's just simply one hell of a butler
His no specific style outside of not really being fond of clothing that may show his body
Let him dress you and you'll come out looking in the most ideal way of your style, he's a butler that caters to other's needs so he knows how to dress people to their tastes!
Though if you let him dress you how'd he like you to look you'll come out looking like a royal or a noble as  that is what you are to him
Simeon
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(Btw why does he dress like a slut)
Has a very casual sense of style tbh, not too formal but not too cozy and lazy, the perfect middle
Though I'd have to say most of his clothes has no sleeves, he has a weird problem with sleeves on his clothing though he will wear them to be appropriate.
Enjoys the fact that heaven gives them stuff to wear cause he actually dislikes finding outfits
Despite this the king of casual comfy clothing like the first fit you try you love immediately 
Let him dress you and you'll come out in an outfit that you'll often wear cause it's so good
Luke
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I feel like dressing with him would be like dress up time with a child
Doesn't know much about fashion since that is not something to be focused on in Heaven and I'm pretty sure they restricted for what they can wear
Has the innate ability to pick out very cute looking clothing though it may not always be comfortable sadly
Dresses in the cute shota fashion, think like Mitsukuni Haninozuka from Ouran Host Club
Is fine dressing in any color but likes dressing in pastel colors the most outside of any shade of blue and yellow
Let him dress you and you'll come out looking adorable! like so cute, very cute and probably matching with him.
Raphael
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(Why is he dressed even sluttier????? WHY IS ASMO MORE DRESSED THAN BOTH OF THE ADULT ANGELS 90 OF THE TIME??? IS HEAVEN A STRIP CLUB????????)
If we think Solomon was bad Raphael is 10x worse because at least Solomon has an idea of what he thinks is cool and what is fashionable even if it sucks Raphael has no idea or care
All outfits chosen by himself is weird and uncoordinated or similar to his regular fit so almost everything for the world to see
Constantly manages to find the most comfortable clothes you can possibly find also, so though he looks weird he's comfy
Actually prefers to have as much skin out as possible as it makes it easier for him to move around and fight if needed
Hates clothing that fully covers his skin and it makes him feel stifled, prefers stuff that isn't close to his skin (he just like me fr)
Let him dress you and you'll come out looking veryyyyyy funky but very mobile and somehow very comfortable, demons stare at you and tell you that "you have a unique sense of fashion" and you have to let them know that you let the "Angel with the Spear dressed you today" and suddenly they understand and are sorry for you
Thirteen
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Thirteen is an amazing fashionista and has an amazing sense of style
I'm sure you can tell by her personalized reaper uniform and R.A.D. uniform but she loves alt styles 
All her clothing is different and ranges from comfortable to non comfortable but most are comfortable because it's supposed to be something she likes
Also doesn't care much for how much of her body is exposed but prefers to always carry some sort of sweater she likes her arms covered but doesn't always care for sleeves or long gloves (she's just like me fr)
Go to a thrift shop with her and she'll find the coolest and comfiest stuff to wear
Let her dress you and you'll come out looking so fucking cool, you'll look like those people on magazines or that cool alt person you see that you add to your pinterest board
Mephihdewuhcds Mephistopheles
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On the same level of dressing as Lucifer and Diavolo (simp) but when asked to dress down dresses like a prep kid
The brands on this man radiates so much money that Mammon's mouth waters and you look like a walking cash bag to him
Most of his clothing is very uncomfortable but he's just gotten used to it (I personally believe he comes from a shitty noble family hence why he's so stuck up) so comfy clothing is foreign and weird to him
Does not know how to dress casual (even in rich branded clothing) as the average person may see it, and is very uncomfortable in casual clothing because of his upbringing
Let him dress you and you'll come out looking similar to how Satan would dress you, a prep student that aces all their exams! (though the clothes may be a bit uncomfortable)
Tags:@kisakis-boyfriend
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luckymousey · 1 day ago
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Thoughts about Ace's dream (parts 245-248) (mostly things I liked)
THEY FINALLY UPLOADED ACE’S DREAM BABYYYYYYYYYY
First of all, to be honest, when I first saw the snap in Tumblr I thought: wait, didn’t the Stitch event end already?🤨 and then I realized it was his dream.
Let’s start!
⚠️ English is not my first language, and there are spoilers⚠️
There might be some spelling mistakes
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Cater filming everything with his phone through the whole ride, I just love how he’s still himself (Honestly, I feel that not a single student of Heartslabyul would feel dizzy because of the traveling, yk, they’re based off Alice in Wonderland, and Alice fell through a hole, I’m sure they would feel dizzy by others things, not something that’s similar to a roller coaster ride) and then he says: ah, but Grimmy was shouting too loudly and the wind is annoying, I need to put music to hide it 😔
I also love the fact that he takes photos of everything even knowing that the photos aren’t in his real phone (I hope they find a way to recover the photos for Cater)
When Sebek asked if Ace is from Sunset Savanna I was like: wait, weren’t they friends? How could he not know? And then I realized i had been looking at too many fanarts of the first year gang *slaps forehead*
Honestly, I’m impressed by how much knowledge this guys have, when Deuce said that Ace lived near the capital of the Kingdom of Roses, Leona started talking about how it was not possible for them to have an ocean near (maybe I’m too dumb to know things like these, maybe not)
Grim getting disappointed that it was a dream, he really wanted to have holidays the 365 days of the year 😂 (my baby son is so cute)
Cater saying that he knew skateboarding and surfing, I don’t know, I just LOVED that fact, even more, I’ve a headcanon of the TWST actor AU I wrote some time ago that says that both Leona and Cater use their brooms like surfboards while filming because they go surfing together during summer.
I love that we got to know more about Cater
Idia’s comment right after Cater explained why he liked those hobbies, he’s like a narrator inside the book, but instead of talking to the public, he talks to himself
AND RIGHT AFTER THAT HIS OWN BROTHER SNITCHES ON HIM, HAHAHA, I just couldn’t stop myself from laughing when he said Idia also made himself a small boat (the video I saw was in Spanish and it said “barca”, which means boat in English, I’m not sure if the game referred it as a literal boat tho)
And Idia’s wish? Riding a shopping cart through a home goods store? I also wish for that, Idia, a lot of people wish doing that, you’re not alone, my man.
When Idia got scared because Cater reminded him of the time when he kidnapped Riddle and others with a smile, he just started stuttering, so cute (his actions weren’t cute tho)
ACE MAKES HIS APPEARANCE, YES BABYYYYYYYY (I love him so much 😭)
Idk why, but I just love when the characters shout at people, like calling them from afar, and Ace nailed it
It seems like the Lilo and Stitch event doesn’t happen in the original timeline, because everyone was so surprised (even Yuu has the option to make a comment about his shirt or his sunglasses)
Honestly, I never, EVER, thought about the fruit that was on Ace’s shoulder until Grim pointed it out, I swear to you all that I started laughing once I imagined someone having to walk with those and couldn’t stop until I remembered I still had to watch the episode (and now I got another headcanon for the actor AU 😈)
AND NOW RIDDLE APPEARSSSSSS
I loved when he went like: “don’t overdo it, got it, Ace?” And then everyone was like: “YOU ARE ALREADY OVERDOING IT!” I think they thought Ace’s imagination was too powerful
When Cater pointed out that Riddle was showing his bellybutton, it reminded me of that meme of: SHOW US YOUR ANKLE, SHOW US YOUR ANKLE (we’re talking about Riddle here, I wouldn’t be surprised if he got flustered about naked skin)
I realized that Riddle is kind of naive, because he says: “Ace told me this was a formal attire for an island” and he just did as he was told, my poor boy, one day, you’re getting pranked
And then he slowly approaches Cater and whispers (which made him look sooooo cute) him if he looks weird (NO MY BABY, YOU DON’T, 10 OUT OF 10, YOU’RE SLAYING MY QUEEN), HE LOOKED LIKE A BABY ASKING HIS OLDER BROTHER FOR ADVICES
Considering both Silver and Sebek are in the same club as Riddle (in one of Ruggie’s cards, Sebek even got punished by him while doing club activities) their surprise is understandable
One thing I didn’t really like is that we didn’t get to see fake!Trey or fake!Cater wearing new outfits 🥹
I know they all wear makeup, but for someone reason my eyes couldn’t stop looking at their eyes, they are all so fucking gorgeous, ugh
Honestly, does someone here knows if Cater is rich or not? Because they also mention that Cater was the one who rented the private island (I know it’s a dream, but who knows) maybe it’s because of his father’s job?
And Cater immediately getting into his role, he knows what he’s doing, he’s so smart, I love him.
When Ace suggests getting changed because he doesn’t like seeing the school uniform Leona said (I’m not quoting from the game): “we’re BUSY” I felt it was more like: “I want to get over this bullshit and take a nap”
THE WAY ACE WAS SMILING WHEN HE ANNOUNCED THE REASON OF THE CELEBRATION, that is the same smile he has when something good happens to him, but knowing what’s going to happen next, I just couldn’t help it🥲
I also realized how much I like when a lot of characters shout at the same time, it’s nice to hear
The part where Ace denied when Trey said how they would get sad talking about Yuu leaving, I know you’re just a tsundere, accept it, Trappola I’m still not prepared for that part
In the video Idia says: “I could be hit by a extroverted lighting” I’m just loving everyhting Idia says
I got sad when Ortho said there was no point in attacking him, I wanted to see Ace getting bullied (don’t hate on me, it’s just karma doing its job)
I would’ve loved if Jack and Epel were there too
Ace was talking like a salesman: “we got pink shirt here, and then a yellow one, and then a blue one” I just can’t with him 😂
We can’t see what is really happening between the characters (like, two characters could be hugging but we aren’t able to see it because this is not an anime, yet) but I believe Grim took Ace by his hair, pulled it and shouted in his ear to make him clear they were in a dream, YOU’RE DOING GREAT BABY, SHOW HIM WHO THE REAL BOSS IS
Aaaaand, we made it until here, no matter how many times I say it, I’m not prepared to reach that part
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rococo-sonata · 2 days ago
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i digged up in my notes and guess what
Kunikida HEADCANONS ☆📗 part 2!!! + some other characters at the end!!!
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- he absolutly hates having his hair down and having his bangs in front of his face like in the oav so he put heavy amont of hair gel that makes his hair feel kinda like cardboard
- he was a troublemaker as a kid
- he's cisgender in a very transgender way. he considers himself a boy only because he was born as one and never really thought about it or feel any connexion to it despite having a schlong. like he's kinda gender apathetic
- it's not a rat tail!!! it's some sort of weird jellyfish haircut he only ties the lower layer and use way too much hair gel
- during his earlier years at the agency he used to have depressive episodes, where he forgot his ideals and bedrotted for days. now he feels so awful about it that he doesn't allow himself to take such breaks
- he likes poetry, mostly romanticism and naturalism. he sometimes writes some himself and has a notebook for it. Dazai found it and thinks his writing style is cringe and corny (he's kinda right...)
- he has a weird laugh, like an ugly one but it's cute
- once he came up with a schedule for katai and katai didn't even look at it
now just random dump of silly hcs i made up about the cast
- atsushi climbs the stairs on all four (even outside...)
- when someone shows him a silly video of a cat falling he takes it personally and answer something like "IT'S NOT FUNNY!! HE HURT HIMSELF😡"
- the type of guy to bite his nails until it bleed and peel the skin of his lips and kunikida swats his hand when he does
- fukuchi always has a favorite in the hunting dogs, sometimes it's tachihara, sometimes teruko, sometimes jouno but it's never tecchou. they're all kinda his children and tecchou is the least favorite💔
- he got fangs like a cat. he's literally just a big cat
- tachihara saw fukuchi as a father figure. he used to admire him a lot and think he was super cool so he sometimes copied his posture or mannerisms. im saying that bcs of this artwork! like look he's literally copying him they're so cute😭
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so imagine how absolutly disappointed he was when he learnt he was kamui.. and when the man he kinda saw like his dad stabbed his eyes... :/ womp womp
- jouno believes he is the most beautiful mesmerizing creature to have ever blessed this planet
- natsume is trans!!! he's a calico cat!!! calico cats are at 99.9% females!!! NATSUME IS AFAB
- he's katai's dad. don't ask me why it's just that scene where he shows up at katai's house they got such a cute dynamic he's his father in my head
- ango got the worst eye correction ever. probably has bifocal glasses for staying on his computer for so long
- kyu does age regression, because this is NOT a 13 years old
- katai is an avid reddit user. he is not the same person online his digital footprint is ass
- i feel like he would love shoujo and slice of life anime that are girl lead like k-on, lucky star, nichijou or azumanga daioh. but not in a weird way. he would envy feminity, how in touch with their own feelings they are, and women frienship and intimacy, he wishes he could experience that too
- he loves cats and wishes he could adopt one but he knows that he wouldn't be able to take care of it in his state and would probably forget to feed it
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asexualbookbird · 2 days ago
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It sure has been a Year huh. Ups and downs this month, as life happens. Saw friends I haven't seen in years, went into the city and met new friends, tried new foods, saw some birds, tried new crafts, read new books.
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The Fireborne Blade by Charlotte Bond ⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Hm! Interesting! Didn't hate it, but something feels missing? Almost like it could've benefited from being at the very least a short novel. It needed more. I also have qualms at this being pitched as sapphic when there is no romance at all and the main character talks a lot about being betrayed by her last romance with a man. One mention of Woman With Hot Thighs. Not mad I read it, might even read it again.
That Time I Got Drunk and Saved a Demon by Kimberly Lemming ⭐️⭐️ ‐ I'll be honest, one star is Mean but I had a lot more fun reading Fourth Wing and that was two stars. The tone is what dragged this one down for me. It reads like YA, but it's very much not. I do not believe for a second the MC is 24, she doesn't act like it at all. The sex scenes. Are there. I could make an entire post about the book ending on them having penetrative PiV sex. Part of my grievances are me not liking the genre, but I truly think this just isn't that good. Plenty of people on the internet write better more filthy works for free. Why was this sitting unassumingly on the library shelf.
*amended to two stars if this is indeed satire
The Dead Cat Tail Assassins by P Djèlí Clark ⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Fine. Not much to say because it was Completely Average. Not mad I read it, but don't wish to repeat the experience. I think maybe Clark isn't an author for me, as I recall feeling similarly about A Master of Djinn. It's not so much that the characters or world feel flat, but something definitely feels missing. It was silly and lighthearted and gory and I did like that though!
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The Spellshop by Sarah Beth Durst ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Another hit from Sarah Beth Durst. I see your Themes. I see your Tropes. Kindness. Found family. Accepting help. All personal attacks on me. Adorable, fun, some sort of cross between T Kingfisher and Becky Chambers, I didn't want it to end, and now have a name for my spider plant. It also seems like I need to get my spider plant a friend.
The Woods All Black by Lee Mandelo ⭐️⭐️ - I have very mixed feelings about this that are really summarized as This Wasn't For Me. I like the idea that yeah you're a monster but someone loves you anyway. I like using the monster to punish those who called you one. I think there's some very specific midwestern religious trauma that I'm missing to really Get It, though. On top of that, while I recognize the themes and significance in the age gap, a 30 year old going after an 18 year old icks me out. I'd still recommend it with very very heavy reservations.
The Spare Man by Mary Robinette Kowal ⭐⭐ - Going to be honest, I just finished this and I'm already moving on. The writing was fine and I'm not put off of the author entirely, but I never felt wowed. I was annoyed more than anything. I didn't love any of the characters, but I didn't really hate anyone either. The amount of people Tesla let pet her service dog drove me nuts. The ending felt slapped together. It never really felt cohesive. I feel vindicated reading that fans of her other books also were unimpressed with this. I wouldn't steer people away from it, but I didn't have a lot of fun.
I'm tentatively excited for February. I have art ideas I'd like to get started on, I am working on a craft thing that I might be able to profit a bit off of, I'm flat out ignoring the world, book club is approaching. I'm looking for good things in the world, and I will find them. That is a threat.
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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago
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Pictures and things
#photo diary#image 1 - pretty sky!.. so many sky photos as always#2 & 3 - baby son keeping me company during one of my Sickness days where I kind of just sit on the floor in a blanket#for hours slowly sipping pedialyte and having applesauce and such lol#He likes to bite the squeezy apple sauce pouches.. and try to steal the heating pad#4. Sky again. lighter more scattered fluffy clouds.#5 - greeting card that I drew at someone's request so they could send it to their elderly family member lol.. It's like.. cats baking#in a kitchen I guess? My eternal curse.. being the number one lover of cats in the world yet still somehow barely having a grasp#on their anatomy so they always look ridiculous when I draw them. I have both drawn and looked at cats for my entire life basically#yet somehow those two things do not come together to make me a good cat artist.. alas..#6 - underpart of an outfit I did (and havent yet posted of course because of my evil backlog of onemillion drafted posts)#I took the main dress off the top but thought the underneath part looked cool on it's own as well#7 - more sky.#8 - Mushroom fettucini alfredo. steak. and grilled asparagus. A fun little meal for me though I can't remember the occasion. I think maybe#as a reward for getting my covid booster or something. Though I still feel it's not as much of a reward when I am personally cooking#everything myself at home gjhbjh.. so its like... I'm having to do quite a lot of labor which makes it feel less relaxing I suppose. but eh#a treat in some form. Still cheaper by overall cost than ordering from a restaurant - and also can be customized and prepared#exactly how I like - which is the point. I guess more I just wish I weren't the only cooking person in the house. Everyone could#take turns making special meals for each other rather than like.. ''hmm I feel like having a treat. suppose I shall spend an hour#making it all myself and then feel tired whilst eating it'' lol.. ANYWAY#9 - and then.. you guessed it..MORE sky pictures!!! This time pinky bluey and so on.. huzzah..#A very sky heavy entry into the photo diaries I suppose#The sky in the 1st/7th image is jsut very ethereal seeming to me. something about the way the lighting is behind the clouds. It's#transportive. An interesting sky will make me feel like many other places in time or things I've seen in dreams or something. You get#a sense of being in a different world or like you're looking out over something you once imagined whilst reading a storybook. maybe lol
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i-gwarth · 2 months ago
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some people will just create the most beautiful, evocative, soul-altering art you could possibly imagine, bring unhoped-for light and joy into your otherwise miserable life, and fundamentally define your aesthetic tastes for the rest of your existence and then continue on with their day like it's just another tuesday
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lavenderjewels · 1 year ago
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I appreciate the love for Shoko but all the theories about her somehow resurrecting gojo from death is really setting her up for disappointment
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foxgirlmoth · 1 year ago
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I had a timeloop dream that feels like it should be fucking me up a lot right now mentally.
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hollow-vok · 3 months ago
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Ohh im obssesed
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#uprooted#uprooted naomi novik#solya#marek#my main playlists dedicated to them :]#idk why they cought my attention in 2018 and since that year they have had a special place in my heart. sometimes throughout my day-#i realise im obssesed with them and they're not just some random characters i like. ive dedicated a lot of time on them#i wonder how my interest in them will be when i get older. i certainly know that i will miss them if i stop thinking about them#you could say they have seen me grow. i knew them BEFORE quarantine. they were with me DURING. and AFTER#they have been through so many phases of my life. its so strange.#they changed so much too...except Marek. he still looks the same I imagined him in 2018. solya is definitely different tho#but i do think i have a different more in depth understanding of both characters#even if the words i read in 2018 are still the same now that i look back at the book. they were so many things unsaid but if u looked-#closely you could understand them. solya and marek as individual characters have so much depth...even if its not explicitly said#or maybe its just me reading between the lines too much. i wish i just knew more about them. this is getting so long-#but I got a bit nostalgic. is crazy how i was just a child and somehow even tho solya was just the total opposite of the type of characters-#i like there was something in him. something that made me look at him. and i think thats actually so in character of him#i think that in the book even if someone didnt like him. it was still hard to look away because he stood out from the rest.#there was definitely something about him that attracted people. or else how would have he gotten so far in his schemes?#I may be overanalyzing it. but i love the Falcon so much. and i do like marek a lot as a character. i find him very interesting. i know he-#did bad. terrible. things i like him as a character. not as a person.#i wish i could have seen what was going on in that damaged mind of his...#analyzing his behavior its so entertaining to me. i love making up scenarios where he is at his worst. im not gonna lie#marek suffering and then finding comfort in not comforting things is one of my favorite headcanons.#his obssesion with his mother is also a very important part of his character (ofc) and i love imagine him doing things related to that#thinking about the ways their personalities connect and make them have a very toxic bond keeps me up at night..they made each other worst#and we actually never see that in depth in the book. everything is so subtle but my crazy brain can find the signs in any part#i will stop this rant here. i feel its so long and if i made any spelling mistake i apologise to my future self (probably my self from-#tomorrow) because i know i won't be able to fix the misspelling and that will stress me SO MUCH.#future self please dont stress about it. just be happy. and enjoy thinking about these insane characters
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l0rd-0f-c0ws · 5 months ago
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I frequently feel completely isolated no matter how much I talk to people. So that's fun
#sorry if anyone sees these im tired of using my personal discord servet to vent. i always spiral too much#anyways i have an idea for a good poem to write for class because of recent events#ughhhh idk i just wish i wasnt so annoying about asking if i can open ip to people#or if someone would just ask if i was okay. i mean actually id probably lie i am not actually good at being open.#but like hey idk it feels nice to feel like people genuinely want to know#ughhhhfhfhf i do this to myself sometimes JSHSJSKDJDJD#welp its just how life goes. i feel lonely all the time and i soldier on#surely helping the next person will make me feel better! nope. surely helping yhis next person will make me feel better! nope. surely-#tgats me. thats what i sound like#yeah idk it feels like everyone is going through something worse than me so itd be a moral failing on my part#to ask them if i could just like. feel bad. noticeably#not even talk about it just look down and out of it for a day#yknow i emailed one of my teachers asking permission to go by a new preferred name#this is at like. a massive very queer and trans art school.#and i asked him permission to do this#and i was joking with my friends about how pathetic i sounded in it#and one of them patted me on the head and said “there there buddy” like very jokingly#but i almost cried because thats the first time in so long someone has like. really tried to comfort me#or shown me much physical affection#my mom gives me hugs and stuff but thats always about her. i dont blame her shes got a lot of stuff going on#but idk its really selfish of me but i just wanna have people see me and feel bad for me and it be about my pain for a little while#ill get over it im just being a teenager but shit god fucking damnit#i just want a break from feeling like my world is falling apart#then getting some footing#then it falling apart again#okay i feel a bit better now better stop the complain train JDJDJSKSJD#hey why do i never hear that it rhymes and everything thays so good#damn i gotta use that more#welp weve reached our stop sorry if anyone ever read thjs. hope you have a nice day tho lol
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oveliagirlhaditright · 1 year ago
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I still can't believe out of everyone and everything that could have gotten rid of the loophole in Angel's curse, it was Illyria (strongly hinted at the very end of the season 12 comics). Just goes to show how the Powers That Be don't care about their champions, and are really kind of evil (though we already knew that). And they were probably keeping the loophole on purpose, thinking that if it wasn't there he and Buffy would just run off and be happy together instead of fighting for them, the bastards.
#buffy the vampire slayer#angel#bangel#buffy comics#buffy season 12#buffy the vampire slayer comics#buffy the vampire slayer season 12#but this has gotten me thinking 'could only someone in the series who was a god. or had god-like powers. get rid of the loophole then?'#and making me want to write some different aus now. like part of me is now wondering if maybe in the future dawn could have somehow gotten#rid of it. as she was the key connected to the goddess glory. and in the comics she stars figuring out how to use her powers and stuff#there are some ideas here for fanfiction#especially since usually in fanfiction that gets rid of it it's usually willow (maybe with tara helping her. sometimes buffy's blood being#involved)#which i GET. but the idea that it was illyria opens some other doors in fanon maybe#and how i wish more 'canon' things would explore it. and bangel in general again. looking at you boom#but you know the god thing kind of does make sense because there's also how buffy and angel have sex in s8 when they're both gods and that#doesn't trigger the curse. either because angel's technically not a vampire with a cursed soul there he's a god and/or they keep the curse#(probably he does) keep the curse being triggered with their powers or something#but back to the dawn thing: as silly as this no doubt is. there's a part of me that wants to write her just portaling the loophole away whe#she discovers her portal powers. lol. i don't think anyone's ever done anything like that before#but i bring this all up because i just read this one really well-written fic where illyria got rid of the loophole#which got me thinking about how she's the one to do so in canon#and then about the loophole in general
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neverendingford · 10 months ago
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#tag talk#fuck. I might just be a straight woman.#like. I like men. and the more I transition the more I vibe with binary womanhood.#sure I don't like getting shoved into restrictive femininity. but I vibe with womanhood as separate from femininity.#anyway. I might be straight. and In ten years it's very possible that being trans becomes a much less huge part of my life#because it will stop being something that I do and something that I wish for and simply something that I am#yeah yeah whatever hi my name is Reggie and I like men#I just. as much as I don't like certain restrictive gender roles I find myself slotting very comfortably into others#and I realize that my idea of gender and their roles was very much shaped by my female role models growing up#and a lot of the disconnect and distress when growing up was due to not being able to follow the path everyone else did.#all my girl friends were growing up into women and I was stuck on the man track.#and being gay was the closest I could get to being myself#but I'm closer than I've ever been before to being able to live my truth as myself#still not gonna shave my legs unless it's sometime in the future for a very specific event.#I like them fuzzy. they make me feel cool.#I like having some cultural masculinity still. I just don't want to be defined by it#talking about my binary trans experience is always a little weird because I'm aware of how binary I'm describing things#and I get that if my words were used to describe someone else's experience it might end up sounding hella transphobic#but these words are for me. they're my experience. they're my life not someone else's.#and this is how my identity works.#it's like how feminism protects the right of trad wives to be trad wives.#we just gotta recognize that just because one woman wants to be the designated dishwasher not every woman feels that way.#anyway. I might be dating a guy by this time next week. he's cool so far and we kinda got match-made by a mutual friend#we watched Redline tonight and it's hella good#he's really cool but I feel like I've got something to provide and to bring to the relationship. so we're still on peer-level I think.#which is new. usually I'm way ahead of the other person. maybe my fault for fishing in the bad fish barrel#the emotionally damaged and burdened fish barrel.
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scarletfasinera · 1 year ago
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Anyway since I can't send an ask because of character limit and I gave up after trying to write it three different ways and it not working, I'll just. Idk write a short vague post back? I'm assuming a vague for a vague is fair (don't worry I don't want to be mean I just have no other way of navigating this situation.) Since I'm exhausted & but want to at least express my view of it.
Idk just on the off chance they see this or one of our shared mutuals shows them or something. My "weak subtext" post had absolutely nothing to do with Adam Warlock, I didn't even remember that I reblogged that poll before making my post. I had seen like six other polls after the Adam one, bc I was actively looking through the blog, that did the exact thing my post was about, the blogrunner (who shall remain anonymous) had Pointed Out in private that it was happening and gave several examples & it was distressing them so I checked the blog myself and commented on it, which was why I made the post. Not the Adam poll in particular which I didn't remember and wasn't thinking about. I do not know enough about Adam to say anything about either the text or the subtext or anything, so I just. Wouldn't? It really baffled me that it was read that way.
Anyway. Farewell beloved mutual we barely knew ye...
#txt#the “people doing that across multiple polls” thing was also why I left the “annoying notes” tag#it just happened to be on the Adam poll because I like Miles and it was ine of the first ones on the blog#I didn't even process that people wouldn't have the background context & would read it as being Very Mean to Adam Fans in particular#But honestly I should have & that's on me & I deleted the post for that reason#Anyway I have NO BEEF with Adam fans and don't know enough about him to make any posts about him#It's just VERY STRANGE to me that this happened like I didn't even think about Adam I was just blogging 😭#I wish they had like asked me for clarification or something like I'm a dumbass and oftentimes an asshole by accident.#And I get misinterpreted A LOTTTTT but I never know how to KEEP IT FROM HAPPENING#and idk. I don't like being misinterpreted & I especially don't like being vagued over misinterpretation so I feel weird about it ):#Especially from a mutual that I liked? But. I'll forget about all this in the morning.#I mean I could also just. Reblog their vague and respond to it maybe#But idk I feel like that's a Lot because I don't want to out them to my followers as Having Vagued Me#I just would LIKE to address it privately but the only way to do that is via ask but it would be too long if I'm being serious about it#And tumblr's ask limit is like 500 fucking characters or something. Idk I tried figuring out the character limit andnit cut it off after#the FIRST PART#It would have taken like 7 fucking messages to send the whole explanation#And I don't want to swamp their ask box#The only reason the explanation is so short here is because I wrote it out in an exhausted Whatever tone that clips some of the explanation#short. Which I don't think would go over well when trying to explain a misunderstanding to someone who is mad at me enough to vague me#anyway here's your reminder that you can have conversations with people instead of jumping to conclusions 😔#I mean I'm not mad and I understand retroactively why the misunderstanding happened#but also if they had even like PM'd me like “Hey if your post was about Adam I disagree bc xyz” and I would have responded like#“Oh my post wasn't about Adam at all and I didn't even realise it seemed like that sorry”#or hell if they'd even anon'd me about it#Like I'm... actually not a mean person... I'm not going to verbally assault someone for interacting with me in good faith...
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