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furiousgoldfish · 4 months ago

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(tw mentions of physical abuse, essay about life after abuse)

Imagine a kid who is forced to work, in a room where they're being kicked while they work. It doesn't happen all the time, but often enough that they know to expect to be kicked while they work. If they refuse to work, abuse gets worse, so the least painful thing they can do is work and endure being kicked.

Eventually, the kid escapes. Now they're in a situation where they need to work to earn income to survive. They only know the one job they did while being kicked, so thats what they do. They find themselves in a room, and as they work, their stomach clenches. They're looking around anxiously, expecting to be kicked. It doesn't happen, but people are walking by, and some of them come too close, and it feels like a kick is about to happen.

They flinch every time and are met with bewilderment, offense, sometimes ridicule for being paranoid. But they can't help it. Being kicked is all they know. Every time it doesn't happen, it feels like a cruel joke, a prank that is being played, a game. A setup to make them feel stupid for imagining they wont get kicked.

From the outside, it looks normal. Nobody is kicking them, nobody is doing any harm to them. Other people must wonder why are they flinching. Why are their reactions bizarre. It comes off weird. Self obsessed. They hold this view of themselves in their mind, because they had to view themselves from others point of view for self preservation. They know they're only viewed critically and try their best to offer a good preformance of normalcy. But it does nothing to change the fear or the pain they feel. They assume its irrational and illogical to feel this, since nobody else seems to be ecperiencing that.

They're no longer being kicked, but they're still in the environment where nobody cares what they're going trough. They do not receive any warmth, concern or understanding; they're unable to connect with anyone in their environment due to differences in life experience. They don't get a chance at bonding or having a community. They're in a sea of impassive strangers, all one their own.

They have no way of asserting their emotions because they're foreign and unrelatable to everyone else. The dissaproval, misunderstandings and judgments fall heavy on their heart, feel li.ke a punishment. They cannot even acknowledge that others around them get acceptance, community, connections and approval, because that concept is unexperienced and foreign to them. They cannot see they're at a disadvantage, and not standing on equal grounds. They feel shame for not managing their situation better, while being an outcast.

And in the end they wish they would just get kicked already. One reliable, predictable and constant thing in their life was replaced by endless anxious anticipation and foreign environment that brings new shame. Before, they could at least count on something, have a tangible proof of harm, know how to react, what to do. Usually after the pain would happen, there would be a few moment of relief because the worst was over and at least they could relax for a second. And their brain adapted to it, releasing relaxing chemicals only after pain, and never breaking tension otherwise.

Now there is no breaking of the tension, nobody is visibly causing pain, and they're stuck feeling anticipation and dread all of the time, coupled with a shame for so 'ičrrationally' feeling this.

This is how it feels when abuse victims are expected to immediately function normally after escaping abuse. Being kicked is a metaphor - it could have been anything that chronically caused distress, pain and loss of control over their life.

It's unreasonable to expect someone from an extreme environment to be quickly okay. It's cruel to put them in a situation reminiscent of abuse in any way and expect them not to flinch. It's ignorant to shame them for wanting back the familiar pain, over the stressful new situation they're not equipped to handle. It's unfair to ignore their disadvantage and act like anyone could be okay without any warmth, connection, understanding or community just because they're not being kicked anymore. Most people would collapse without all that.

It gets worse before it gets better after escaping abuse. It doesn't mean it was wrong to escape, or that victims can't learn to function. Victims are often going above and beyond to make it, and are rewarded for it by being forced to see themselves trough the eyes of society that judges them for being set up to fail.

It will get better. Your brain can and will adapt. You will gain experiences that will allow you to have things in commom with others. You won't have to feel inadequate or ashamed forever. Especially if you can be in a room with people who understand what was done to you, and will not put you in a situation where you have to wonder when a kick is coming.

#child abuse #cptsd #abusive parents #escaping abuse #abuse aftermath #abusive environment #trauma #complex trauma

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krisluxxeeempress · 2 months ago

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MARS OPPOSITE ASCENDANT SYNASTRY | SYNASTRY SERIES

The ascendant person in this shared synastry will to some degree experience disillusionment with the mars person. When we think about meeting new people, especially, of romantic or sexual nature, we tend to appear in a way that isn’t quite authentic. Granted, that is the case generally because most believe “ first impressions are important”, therefore, we are subjected to these false facades, personalities and ultimately, the appearances of others. Those who like to think of themselves as open-minded and adaptable are especially challenged. There are some ascendant signs that are indeed open minded, flexible, accepting and accommodating to whomever and whatever is opposite to them; and then there are ascendant signs who simply are not. The problem with this opposition will depend heavily on the ascendant person because as forementioned, some want to believe they are open minded to others that are different and then there are those who are not- but may surprise you, if the right pressure is applied; they may become tolerant and eventually accepting. As with any synastry compilation, it can vary how the energy is played out between two individuals in a relationship.

The ascendant in astrology reveals the perspective that one has of their environment, the world and in this case relationships. Our perspectives are born from experiences in addition to what we observe and how others treat us. A libra ascendant for example, views the world in relation to others. Everything is superficial, surface level, sexual, materialistic and all about being in relationship of any kind.

A libra ascendant believes truly, that their appearance and people skills can make or break them. Whereas a Scorpio ascendant has experienced circumstances that make them perceive the world in an untrusting manner. A Scorpio ascendant understands why a Libra ascendant thinks appearances and impressing others matters though, they do not agree, nor will that make a Scorpio ascendant act or see the world or their environment the same and so forth.

A libra ascendant will trust everyone because they do not know or want to believe that others do not deserve to be trusted like that of a Scorpio ascendant individual.

A libra ascendant person for example will attract a mars opposition and this superficial mentality and worldly perspective will be challenged by way of the mars person and trust me, the mars person will either make or break the ascendant person. If the mars person "breaks" the ascendant in Libra person, this will manifest as avoidance.

With such a statement made about “making or breaking a person”, proves to be very relevant if we consider mars co- ruling Scorpio as well. The mars person not only brings challenges but also offers transformation and this eventually, will become painful, shocking, foreign and very uncomfortable to the ascendant person- depending on the sign the ascendant resides in. Some opposites attract and can handle the other, whereas others cannot. Perhaps this occurs because there is a lack of respect for the opposite energy and in this case, person.

In the beginning, we are all on our best behavior and the mars person has the ability to suppress their natural energy aka. put up a façade but this eventually will be perceived as deceptive to the ascendant person who saw a “different side”, a more appealing side in the mars person in the beginning. Talk is cheap whereas action matters, therefore, the ascendant person easily believes the words coming from the mars person until their actions start to not match.

No pun intended -

With opposites, it’s very difficult to determine where the energy starts and begins. We may all assume that the mars person may be the initiator and pursuer of the ascendant person but sometimes, it’s the other way around. The mars person may be attracted to the ascendant person because subconsciously, they feel that it is their mission and duty to challenge the ascendant person and give them a new perspective on life. The ascendant person, however, may be attracted towards the mars person because they are seeking a different outlook, challenge, perspective or maybe even pain or drama.

This synastry combination reminds me of financially comfortable or wealthy person, who may be attracted to someone who physically opposes that.

Let’s say the ascendant person was born into a wealthy family. We can already assume their perspective on life is in alignment with wealth and he/she may not resonate or understand the struggles of those who were not born or raised into wealth. So, if the mars person is the one who was born into the trenches and somehow attracts the ascendant person, who, in my example is wealthy- the mars person and their struggles and baggage, will challenge the ascendant person.

The ascendant person may eventually become down to earth, understanding, sympathetic even and or maybe, humble. Or simply reject the mars person because they do not fit into their worldly perspective. The ascendant person may have the perspective of “ well I have money; therefore, I must be with someone who has money”.

We see this play out in reality and the rare times we see the opposite, a wealthy man/woman who chooses someone “regular and normal”- it’s a big deal. Of course, speculation that really derives from jealousy is cued in, with statements like “ he/she just wants them for their money, status etc.”. It’s honestly quite sad but I digress.

Let’s say the ascendant person has a Sagittarius rising. In simplistic terms, they have had the privilege to travel the world and or enroll in ivy league colleges. Let’s say the mars person is in Gemini and they have only travelled locally and or went to community college. The ascendant person may not accept the mars person because to them, they aren’t good enough. This energy can also play out where the mars person is never in the right places to even attract the ascendant person because maybe they simply don’t have access.

The ascendant person is like the important person in the VIP whereas the mars person is stuck outside waiting in line for a chance to get in. They may share the same space, environment or see each other in passing but they may never actually get the chance to meet.

In the event that they do meet, there’s a small window allotted for the ascendant person, really, to decide if they can “tolerate” the challenge the mars person presents.

More examples would be the ascendant person being the CEO and the mars person the worker. Obviously, the CEO, makes more money and ultimately is superior to the mars person. Will the CEO give the mars person a chance, especially in a relationship sense? Or will the CEO look down on the mars person? Will the CEO ever be in the same room as the worker?

The ascendant person is like a celebrity and the mars person, “the groupie” especially if the ascendant person has a arrogant perspective contingent upon the sign the ascendant is in. Perhaps the ascendant person comes into contact with the mars person in a clothing store – kind of like how Chris Brown met Karruche. I am not saying Karruche was a groupie but she certainly knew who Chris Brown was- not the other way around. Karruche was working in a clothing store and met Chris Brown and it was at that moment that he felt challenged.

I can only assume his perspective and thoughts about Karruche, being the mars person, was along the lines of “should I entertain this woman? If I do, I’ll make her famous or well known like me”, “what if she’s going to use me or try to get pregnant?”. And so forth. With Chris Brown being the ascendant person, his perspective is deriving from his lifestyle, experiences and past relationships that are now being challenged in such a moment.

From the outside looking in, Chris Brown chose Karruche because Chris brown was initially “ a nobody” BEFORE and became somebody therefore, choosing Karruche, the mars person, he accepted the challenge of her being a normal person and giving her a chance. A rare situation. I may have digressed however the point is, in that moment, they were both opposites and they eventually fell in love until Karrueche was disillusioned by way of being cheated on by him.

There is always some kind of superiority and inferiority complex with this synastry combination, in which also breeds insecurity, mainly for the mars person. Mars energetically is always trying to prove themselves and this is extended especially towards the ascendant person. You would think the mars person is in control of this dynamic but no, not at all.

I personally have my mars in taurus and let’s say, I came across a Scorpio ascendant. The Scorpio ascendant person is already set in their ways and viewpoints of everything around them including themselves. With my mars in taurus, though it’s fixed, I would feel inclined to make the Scorpio ascendant person trust me. Having the Scorpio ascendant person trust me is the challenge that I want to overcome. The Scorpio ascendant person will be challenged with actually trusting me when I’ve done nothing but show trustworthiness however, I am the one exerting more energy, as the mars person.

It is more important for the mars person to gain validation, I suppose, from the ascendant person than the other way around. Back to my example, Chris brown being the ascendant person can have anyone he wants and Karrueche, being the mars person, knows this. She would have been the one trying to be the only one, Moreso than Chris Brown- as the ascendant person.

In a way, this synastry combination is fated especially if the ascendant person accepts the challenge of their opposite. Karrueche may have never met or come across Chris Brown at any other point in her life because they did not run in the same circles, nor did she have the same money or status that Chris brown has- it was clearly fated, and the two of them falling in love was proof.

This synastry is also equivalent to star cross lovers to some degree as well. The rich and the poor. The educated and the uneducated, the successful one and the unsuccessful one. The attractive one and the unattractive one. The hustler and the lazy mf. The drug dealer and the church girl/boy. The promiscuous one and the virgin. The skinny one and the fat one- you get the point.

The ascendant is the rising one so to reiterate, the mars person will be the one who feels insecure or unworthy somehow in this dynamic.

As a libra ascendant, it would be very difficult to be with a mars in Aries individual who is only focused on themselves whereas, I am focused on the both of us. I wouldn't be able to respect a mars in Aries individual because of their selfishness and my selflessness. So i repeat, some opposites can work and others, not so much. I would feel inclined to avoid a mars in Aries individual because as a Libra ascendant, i have no interest in changing my perspective on equal give and take- even if my perspective is superficial or unrealistic, as a Libra ascendant can be.

This dynamic also reminds me of people who walk past expensive stores in the mall without so much as a glance. The expensive store is the ascendant, and the passerby is the mars. The mars person won’t glance at or even inside the store because they are intimidated or insecure about not being able to afford whatever is in the store aka the ascendant. So, most times, you will observe or not, that the mars person really wants the ascendant person but again, does not feel confident enough to approach them ( or change them) but this is covered up by not even appearing or acting like they want the ascendant person.

Expensive stores never reduce their prices which makes them exclusive. It will be up to the mars person, the passerby to step their funds up to walk inside the store and be able to buy something- back to my previous example. The mars person is the one who may or may not put in the extreme effort to prove themselves to the ascendant person- because the ascendant person may not change their perspective. Just like the expensive store may never change their prices despite your sob stories, expired or fraudulent coupons.

Just like as a Libra ascendant, i would not care about whatever sob stories or life circumstances that made a mars in Aries individual selfish. I cannot accept that behavior- no matter what.

As forementioned above, with opposites it is very difficult to tell where the energy starts and ends therefore, the roles can be interchangeable.

The ascendant person could very well be the insecure one who may need to change their perspective etc. to earn the mars person but again, this is contingent on the signs involved.

#astrology #krisluxxeeempress #astrology observations #astro community #astro observations #astrologer #astrology aspects #astro notes #synastry astrology #ascendant synastry #mars synastry #predictions

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aclockworkreader · 5 days ago

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Hi! I was wondering if you had any thoughts about everything that is going on around It ends with us. I didn't really know anything about the actors until after the movie was released and now I've seen that all the people involved seem to have horrible politics. I feel like this is similar to what happened in the Amber Heard trial, it's being treated like some kind of entertaining show even though the allegations are really serious. I think that the media coverage is not being helpful either and this type of cases might scare victims to speak up about their experiences after seeing how quickly everybody seemed to believe Baldoni.

i actually have a LOT of thoughts about this.

i made a video about the it ends with us movie (this was months before any news about her allegations and the lawsuit came out) and in it i briefly talked about the “drama” that was surrounding the press tour. i mentioned that while i don’t like any of the actors involved, i think most of what’s being said about blake lively is just misogyny and that i don’t trust justin baldoni because anyone who considers themselves a feminist and says “this is a story about women and i wanted it to be told by women” would never a) adapt this book in the first place and b) make himself the director.

and now, after all the news came out, i still stand by what i said.

what’s happening is exactly like the depp/heard trial and is a direct result of its outcome. people want a perfect victim. they cannot conceptualize that a woman can be complicated, unlikeable, even a bad person, and still be the victim of a crime. it doesn’t matter if blake lively is difficult to work with, took over the project, or is just simply annoying, everyone deserves a safe work environment free of sexual harassment. the way the public turned against her so quickly…..it’s genuinely disturbing. and for what?? a man people barely knew a few months ago? they believe him because he’s a self proclaimed feminist?? evil men flock to feminism the way they flock to religion, because they think it will absolve them of their sins.

i mean his team (which is the same pr team johnny depp hired, if that wasn’t already a huge red flag) has outright admitted to manipulating the public and turning them against her during the press tour?? his team isn’t even denying her claims (because they can’t because she has evidence) so instead they’re going with the “she was asking for it” narrative. it’s textbook! if it weren’t so fucked up, it would be funny.

and even if you ignore all that, even if you don’t want to look at the facts or the truth, even if you want to ignore all the signs we’ve seen a thousand times before—i would much rather be wrong about believing her than be wrong about believing him.

#i probably have more to say #but that’s what it boils down to #idk this shit makes me so mad #the woman got married on a plantation and i’m out here defending her that’s how dire the situation is that’s what our world has come to #anyway #asks

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benevolentindigo · 2 months ago

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So… Fear, right?

Are you really as evil as they say, or are you just as afraid…?

*Fear takes a deep "breath" before responding*

"N-No... I am n-not..."

"I... D-Do not have any intention of "being evil" or causing harm to anybody in any way. I-In fact... My purpose is to protect... You, Others, E-Everyone..."

"E-Even at the very begining, through the experiences of p-pain and associations with death shared by all that has dwelled on the land, seas and skies... I had been created; And I-I have continued to develop, evolving and a-adapting through the times into what I-I am now. I... m-may have been born out of pain, b-but I was not created to cause it. I guess I... Consider myself as a g-guardian made to be on alert and to ensure the survival of those under my shade..."

"A-A lot have changed since primordial ages, life for most creatures, s-specifically, beings like you, is more... Relaxing. No need to fear for hunger, thirst or predators... Y-Yet, I still remain, j-just in a different form. I-It's still me, just trying to help even in such a d-different environment. Yet, d-despite the changes throughout all of time, my purpose will r-remain the same; Making sure that you know how to thread safely throughout life..."

"Sometimes, I may overreact. Sometimes, I may be overbearing. Sometimes, I may take control. Sometimes, I may be correct. Sometimes, I may be wrong. And for a-all the times that I am, I will apologise. I-I'm not perfect, and I-I do n-not cause harm out of malice, as all that I do... Is to make sure that what you do today will allow you to survive the following week and thrive in the following year; But, s-sometimes, I need to remind myself that I cannot always... Keep you within boundaries; And... S-Some risks can be allowed for you to truly be able to enjoy life."

"Many... Like you have said, belive that I a-am "Evil", B-But... They do not u-understand; Understand why I exist, understand my purpose, understand what I am... Thus, many see me as a plaque, a w-weakness in their minds. I... do not want to b-be feared. I don't want to be hated. I-I'm only here to help. Y-Yet... O-Others have tried... G-Getting rid, or even killing me... But I'll always be there as an innate r-response, my roots... Embedded deep within your nature, curated by the blood of your ancestors. To deny my existence, is to accept death."

"Do I care because I truly love others and you? I'm... N-Not sure myself, a-after all, I am just some concept that had been... Interpreted in this form. But, I w-would be lying if I said It wasn't in my nature to do so... I need; I want, you to be alive to see the sunrise of tomorrow so that we can continue to persist. However, I cannot deny that even for beings like us, death is inevitable. When the last book have crumbled to dust, when the last creature breathes it's final breath; When the last words are said and w-when last soul fades into the ether... W-We would cease to... E-Exist; As there is no... Mind to be affected by concepts like... Us; And I... Am... Not p-personally ready... For t-that... Time... Yet..."

"..."

*Fear takes another "breath" to recollect themselves*

"...B-But I know it won't happen for a long... Long, while. For hundreds of millions of years, I've... Done my role in the minds of billions, possibly even trillions before you, and I am... Happy, that life has persisted and that the world is thriving; And, I-I want to keep it that way. I would... love for me, you, everyone, to keep l-living on, as long as... Possible, to make the most out of our current existence; In the present moment. T-Try to... Be at peace, but at the s-same time, be wary, as you need to be able to sway and withstand the winds of fate; A-As well as support, or avoid those that come before you."

"There are... Many things in life that are scary... So many things that could hurt you, so many things that could kill you. B-But know that you aren't alone... When I see danger, you will feel me, as I too, am afraid. However, I'm... Afraid for c-careless, and reckless people who d-disregard my existence a-and I'm afraid of people who hate my existence b-because they do not u-understand that I-I'm not a foe. So please... Understand and be willing to work with me... Be not afraid, as..."

"All that I do..."

"...Is to try and keep you safe."

//Eueueueueue

And ya I've not been doing nothing I've been working on this for the past 4 days along side other stuff euebdhhehe

God sorry I took so long bruj ejemdsnhdhdd

I've been waiting for this type of question to come sjdvdjdbhd

Btw all the images except for the 1st one is metaphorical so don't take it like anon literally saw it or idk djdvdbdb

I hope u enjoy this response, Anon shsjbdbd

Btw yes Fear did throw quite a bit of shade at Hatred too subtly

Anyways here are some alternative versions too

This is like the og pic lol because I wanna make the "message" clearer (or something idk if it even worked sjdhjdd)

This one is without the blur and color blend because hehe pretty colors and ya I used the colors of the vices

Without effects so that u can see the pain of me moving and placing each kaji 😭

And yes, nine sols reference hehehhe

Oh ya had to sacrifice one of the art in the message because I reached the image limit 😭

Again hopefully now I can finally finish the other 3 asks waiting for me 😭😭😭

#fear block tales #block tales parody #roblox block tales #block tales #ask blog #tumblr parody #parody #fear answers #monologue #yapping #ranting #fear #9 sols #nine sols #nine sols ref #block tales fear fanart #block tales fanart

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outsidereveries · 7 months ago

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hello! I am new in kpop and i am starting to accompany enhypen,bts and IVE. They overall are good people?Because i don´t want stan bad people persona in behing camera ik. What cards say?

I asked about the members' overall personality (whether it's good or bad).

most likely to be nice

ive's jiwon (liz): the devil rx

might be the most nice out of all of the mentioned members in these 3 groups. she tries to show the most authentic side of herself - the good and bad. to me she's first because i appreciate the raw side more than anything. liz tries to be really pure with dives and her solo stans, so i can feel whatever she shows is genuine.

bts' jung kook: 6 of pentacles rx + 10 of cups

to me he is possibly the second most nice person out of these 3 groups, i feel so. jungkook is helping other people, sometimes even more than needed. this might make jungkook more naive than he really is like, but he actually loves to do that. he's very optimistic boy, very happy, there's only positive things i can see and feel. like i said before, a total sunshine. to you, he might be the most nice out of the members of these 3 groups.

enhypen's jungwon: 2 of cups

very communicative with people, he loves to get close with his audience and he actually cares for engene and not only them. it feels like he's someone who's willing to help even if he cannot to do it.

bts' yoongi (suga/agust d): knight of pentacles

very determinated to work what he loves! despite everything he's been through, suga loves to do music, beats and these things that are related to his idol job. suga is working for the feeling of the hobby itself and to him is pure admiration of the job itself. it makes him happy and if army and his solo stans are happy, like his work and so on, he'll be even happier. he lives for the job, it makes him happy and feel that there's purpose for his life. (compared to other people, i see suga has changed quite a lot and has grown up as a person. he'll do the same with his friendships and not only, the relationships with people)

bts' jimin: page of pentacles

he is pretty much a perfectionist. jimin's intentions to everyone are purely good but he tries to have the perfect friendships and etc. with people which sometimes isn't good because sometimes we have to get into any hardships. jimin seems to have this perfectionism as a habit. overall the vibes i am sensing are good but he has some traits that are hard to change.

bts' seokjin (jin): 2 of wands

since he got out of military recently, i see he tries to adapt. jin also seems really nice person, like without a doubt, but he has hard time with adapting and re-adapting. since i feel his thoughts rather than is he good or not, jin might not know either not because he did something but rather than the environment in hybe has changed too rapidly. jin seems to not be used into the corporation as it is nowadays.

enhypen's jake: page of cups

compared to jungkook, jake is also a bit naive. he might be a fool at times, but i sense he's not that experienced in real life for some reason. he might be introverted in some aspects and even have issues to communicate properly, but he's not as bad as some people might think. he's really nice person and might sometimes look like a lost puppy, but once you "get to know him", he's not that bad.

enhypen's sunwoo (sunoo): 5 of wands rx

also nice boy but doesn't like arguments. sunoo's very chill and hates quarrels. he'd prefer to either not take a side or give something to someone else just to not hear screams and feel bad. i am not sure if it's related to how he grew up in his family, though. this seems to be a side he has for some time.

bts' hoseok (j-hope): 7 of cups

he's also nice, like really nice. why he's low compared to his other members though for me is because he's extremely multi-layered. he's not only sunshine, he's not only the main dancer of bts. hobi has a lot to say, if you let him to do it. he wants to be raw and pure and just himself (to be as similar as liz) but considering his status and other circumstances, he cannot do that just yet. currently hobi is overthinking more than usual and if hybe just make him free to talk what he wants to say, he'll just do it, but just not yet..

bts' taehyung (v): the moon

even more multi-layered than j-hope. nowadays he is harder to get mainly because he wants to "break free". the freedom he seems to long for is rather related to his beliefs, they seem to be the main key. he feels too many emotions at once. why he's so high, though, compared to the other people, is because i sense this blockage is temporary and possibly because i've been in a similar situation before. he's not bad at all but he currently is going through a period that make him feel mixed. despite him being in the military, v seems to be around coworkers there that are trying to wake him up spiritually.

bts' namjoon (rm), enhypen's heeseung: 5 of swords rx

both boys are neutral to me. so, about namjoon, i see he's a bit better compared to heeseung. rm has been through a lot too but he seems to be in a "not this but not that" situation. heeseung on the other hand, i cannot sense much except that he might be currently really passive. heeseung seems to be harder to get. both boys are deeply in their thoughts and in different situations but they aren't as bad as they might be. currently they just are a bit harder to reach simply because they're overthinkers, especially bts' leader.

ive's gaeul, ive's wonyoung: 4 of pentacles rx

wonyoung is better to me. her mental health is so and so and that affects her a lot. despite how popular she is, wonyoung seems to get through the things in a odd way and it just cannot be explained by everyone. she's very generous and thankful for this lifetime but nonetheless she tries to be chill and to strengthen her mentality (psyche). gaeul on the other hand, my intuition said "uh she's so and so as a person". i don't have anything else to say.

enhypen's sunghoon: 5 of pentacles

he's currently getting through a lot and i am unsure where to put him. intuition-wise and through older readings, he's more introverted but despite that, he's also really nice.

enhypen's riki (niki): 9 of swords rx

from older readings i've sensed his personality differs a lot from most of the members, so that's why he's this down.

ive's rei: ace of pentacles

she's workaholic to the extent she doesn't think about anything else, like work is her only purpose. rei's "more nice" than yujin because she doesn't have ill intentions behind all of this and that's her way to cope with .. anything. i don't feel much for her too.

ive's yujin: king of pentacles

another workaholic to the extent her work is only on her mind. the difference is that she gets so obssesed over the work she has that she loses herself.

enhypen's jay: 4 of swords

.. very passive person, more than heeseung if i have to compare with him. he's down here because this trait of his is prominent.

ive's hyunseo (lesseo): 3 of swords

sometimes she's too brutal with her words. exteremely honest but also critisize a lot without working on herself for example. basically, she has traits that aren't good. i don't see she's manipulative but she has some work to do if she does want to change.

least likely to be nice

my ask was based on one card for each member and it's allegedly the "overall look". there might be some discrepancies here and there so i also used my intuition.

done on 29.06.2024

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novelconcepts · 9 months ago

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PLEASE elaborate on the yj videogame idea (if u want)

I dunno where it actually came from, but periodically @owltrifecta and I just spitball what an open-world game adaptation of the show would look like. The crash takes place, and then the player would just make an endless series of decisions that affect the outcome of the story. You can play it true to canon, or you can make changes, but every change would then mess with the story more. Like, yeah, you saved Laura Lee from the plane, but later on, she's trying to sabotage the rituals. Or you rescue Jackie, but then a bunch more characters die of starvation. Taissa stays awake and the wolves don't eat Van, but they press on too far, and find some other horror waiting in the dark. Just a delightful terrifying Choose Your Adventure in the wild.

It would just turn into this Reddit thread environment of people being like "I am trying to make Shauna the antler queen, does anyone know what series of events have to happen???" or "I accidentally got LOTTIE to the take the plane, and she blew up, now what?" You'd get players who try to speedrun their way out of the woods, caring only about getting their favorite out alive, and you'd get the ones who would not REST until they save everyone (spoilers: you cannot save everyone, no matter what you do). Some are only invested in coaxing their ship together. Some want so badly to kill Misty. Travis only makes it out in like a third of the playthroughs, but his death seriously fucks up your chances of getting Natalie out safely.

And, in the middle of it all, you've got Van the unkillable goalie. It becomes a Thing for a subset of players, trying to take her out, but she just. won't. die. Players try to lure her into the frozen lake, thinking they've done it, but when spring rolls back around she's just loitering on the shore. She goes over the cliff? Just rolls to the bottom, unscathed. Set her on fire, the game glitches spasmodically, and then she's just standing there with a few burns and a shrug. My favorite idea in this was Owl positing that Van is the only character who can--and will, if you try to deliberately kill her enough times--break the fourth wall. The only one who understands she's in a story. "Oh, did you think you were in charge here? Joke's on you, dude. It chooses. You don't."

#ask #yellowjackets #it would be fucking delightful and so so upsetting to play #no two playthroughs are the same even if you think you're making the same choices #there are always tiiiiiny little ramifications #and the glitches are just bonkers #after doomcoming someone just gets stuck tripping out for the rest of the game #jackie dies but her voice keeps echoing whenever shauna's onscreen and none of the other characters react #taissa glitches out and there are suddenly two of her in any given scene. one does what the player wills. the other does not.#there's a whole weird DLC where you play as nugget #the opportunities are just boundless

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granulesofsand · 2 years ago

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Violent Survivors

As I’m seeing more content about the Crowded Room, there are some things I want to say.

I do understand that DID (or any other CDD) systems get a lot of negative attention from media. These disorders have been demonized by horror creators who only see us as a fun moral exercise, and it isn’t fair that survivors are reframed as abusers or liabilities. Most systems aren’t violent, most trauma survivors are not violent.

However. Some systems do struggle with secondary issues. Depending on what had to be done internally to achieve survival and not victimization (death), folks can come out of their abusive environments with a variety of unhealthy coping skills.

Some of us did have to hurt people. Some of us had to emotionally cope with that. Some of us didn’t have a choice as to whether or not we perpetrate, because if one alter won’t we will be split until someone will. That doesn’t even include systems who end up with personality disorders or other adaptive survival skills that don’t work in a safe environment.

I, as an alter, have been hurt by people who didn’t actually have another option. I have been hurt by people who did have another option. And I wholeheartedly forgive them. I also was them. There are cycles that go on that don’t always have an off ramp, and I cannot overemphasize how lucky we were that we got out. Because it was just that. Luck.

I can respect the right of the people I’ve hurt to be angry, afraid, pained, or any other emotion they’re having about me. The rest of y’all are not those people. It takes so much to keep from drowning in shame about the things that I’ve done, the belief that I am unforgivable and inherently bad.

This isn’t helping. I did what I needed to do to survive. There are more layers to these things than meet the eye, and it is still okay for survivors to be upset at abusers. It just isn’t okay to go on about how impossible it is for a system to be violent.

It takes a lot to heal. Anger is a good emotion to grab onto, especially if you struggle with fawning. But I didn’t hurt you. Leave me out of it, leave my system out of it, leave everyone like us out of it. RAMCOA survivors did what we had to to survive, we don’t need to put ourselves in danger with this toxic shame. Take your anger to the producers.

#did osdd #dissociative identity disorder #traumagenic system #actuallydid #ramcoa #tw ramcoa #did system #polyfragmented system #osddid #complex did #highly complex did #cdid #hc did

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mbti-notes · 4 months ago

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Anon wrote: Hi! 18 y/o ENTP here! I’ve always wondered about the role that culture plays in personality development. In my case, I came and know people from cultures where security is highly emphasized (the East Asian and southeast Asian kind, to be more precise) , and it seems like people have suppressed their natural tendencies very well to fit in in order to maintain survival needs , to fulfill their desire for status and well, “face”. I am personally not very adept at these and I eventually convinced myself that these people probably made a lot of unnecessary sacrifices just to live a life that is socially acceptable. Yet knowing that I am just terrible at meeting expectations, i suspect that my ability to adapt to my environment is just pathetically low hence my opinions are not justified. Security is important, no way I can refute against that.

Can oneself change their orientations just to meet the demands of their environment? I am aware that it is not often the case, but I feel like the way such theory may apply differently in more collectivistic cultures, at least from what I’ve observed. There’s indeed a lot of people who deviate from their original self, and they think it is constructive even though their way of thinking is just elitist and doesn’t take account for nuance. It almost seems like the end goal of self-improvement is to fit some idealized community image while tooting their own outstanding qualities (which is ironic, we all know they just wanted to play safe) and save for retirement. Or maybe, i wouldn’t be thinking of this if only I could’ve done what my parents , institutions and corporations expected of me. Things would’ve been less complicated if I tried to suck it up and become that doctor or lawyer that everyone respects. Life would’ve been so much easier when you are in line with society instead of sticking out like a sore thumb. And that is the kind of thing i wish would stop happening to me even though I don’t see the point of doing what everyone does (since that invites more competition and workplace toxicity which i cannot cope, obviously)

Should I stop caring so much about fitting expectations by attaining absolute job security as the end goal, or my self-improvement has to align with a value that is universally important but difficult to achieve? If i go with the first one, it almost seems like I am trying to escape from putting in effort to work with the second option, but going with the second one could leave out other interesting options to live a life that could be equally fulfilling.

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There are several problems/errors in your thinking because you're conflating many concepts that need to be understood separately:

(1) Oversimplistic View of People

The key point isn't about personality but about values. It doesn't matter the personality type, values play a major role in guiding one's future direction in life. It sounds like you haven't done enough to clarify what your values are, which means you are likely to struggle with making good decisions and finding good direction. What happens when you lack strength and conviction in your own values? The void within is easily filled by external forces.

The void is YOUR problem and it is YOUR responsibility to address it. By blaming external factors like parents or society for pressuring you, you are deflecting responsibility. What this does is set up an attitude of "me vs world". Eventually, the inner conflict morphs into an outer conflict, and you start treating your parents and society as "enemy". It's then easy to irrationally believe that your existence, freedom, individuality, etc, is under constant threat.

When you approach life with a "me vs world" attitude, you are always on defense and come across as combative right out of the gate. This doesn't encourage people to listen to you and understand where you're coming from. While it is true that not everyone is capable of reasonable discussion, you're not going to find out who is or isn't as long as you don't give people the benefit of the doubt.

You seem tempted to adopt an "individualist" mindset to justify going against cultural expectations, but there are significant disadvantages to it. When you focus too much on the individual, it's easy to fall into the trap of blaming individuals for larger social forces that are beyond their control. Culture doesn't just appear out of nowhere.

For instance, East and Southeast Asian countries are populated with people who have been directly impacted by some very extreme and traumatic historical events. It is an appropriate and reasonable response to value security because of it. You are lucky to be born in a generation where security is possible, which means you are among the most likely to take it for granted.

Life is difficult for most people. The majority of us, not born to great wealth, have to make difficult calculations, concessions, and trade-offs in order to obtain what we need from society. Society intersects with personality insofar as different personalities value different things and will thus make different decisions about what aspects of culture to accept or reject.

Having conviction in your values requires you to apply them fairly and consistently. If you hope for people to be accepting of the difficult choices you have to make, then you should be the first to accept the choices they have made. While I recognize your attempt to see the other side of the issue, you haven't reached a full understanding, so you aren't capable of genuine acceptance yet. You still speak about their decision to "conform" with disdain, as though it is a lesser choice that makes them lesser people. Be warned that having a shallow view of people contributes to feelings of alienation.

Acceptance is much easier when you're mature enough to realize that: 1) people are complicated and you shouldn't rush to judge when you don't understand their full experience, 2) what other people do is none of your business, and 3) other people's opinions should only inform yours when they are valid opinions, and validity isn't always easy to determine.

At the end of the day, while you should consider outside opinions, the values you hold have to be chosen by you. The reason you are easily triggered by outside opinions/expectations is because they are exposing the truth of your void within. When you have a deeper psychological issue that remains hidden or you refuse to address it, you end up becoming hypersensitive to any mention of it. If you don't want to be hypersensitive, then the answer is to stop blaming and face the problem head on within yourself.

You seem to want to contrast yourself with your culture by claiming to care more about individual choice, but you can't claim to be an individual when you don't know your own values. As long as your values are unclear, you are in a poor position to advocate for yourself. How can you persuade others to be sympathetic to your perspective or convince them that you are capable of making good decisions when you can't articulate why your values are important and worthy of upholding through your life decisions?

No parent wants to see their kid miserable. Can parents, especially Asian parents, be pushy, bossy, and overbearing? Sure. However, if you meet their pushiness with adolescent rebellion, you won't get far. Culture aside, any normal parent wants to see that you have a good head on your shoulders before they trust you to make big decisions for yourself. If you're able to approach them as a capable adult who takes life seriously, you might find them much more amenable to discussion.

An important aspect of learning how to use Fe properly is to realize that you have a big influence over how social interactions proceed, so learn to wield that influence wisely. But this isn't possible as long as you always see yourself as a victim of outside forces.

(2) Oversimplistic View of Society

What your parents expect of you may or may not overlap with societal expectations, however, one should not simply assume they are the same. From a Jungian perspective, parents often act as a stand-in for understanding society. However, how can two individuals adequately represent an entire society made up of thousands or millions of people? They can't. This would be an illogical leap. At best, your parents represent only a few aspects of society as a whole.

Of course, you don't only see society through your parents. You also have peers, friends, school, or work experiences. However, keep in mind that people tend to segregate themselves based on factors such as class, race, ethnicity, religion, educational attainment, common interests, etc. It is very likely that the people you've been exposed to outside of family are very similar to your parents with regard to the above factors. Therefore, it is still only a small sliver of society you are seeing.

Of course, you also learn about society through media. However, media companies are mainly interested in making money rather than providing a realistic, nuanced, and comprehensive view of society. What makes money for them? Lowest common denominator stuff; images that appeal to the simplest and often basest aspects of human nature. It is not only a small sliver of society being presented here, but a heavily distorted view of it as well.

All of this is to say that, with the little life experience you possess at 18, what you think you know about culture and society is extremely limited. You feel constrained by this thing called "society" and don't realize that what you're actually being constrained by is your own oversimplistic or distorted idea of what society is.

You are clashing with your parents and you've extended that clash to society, to the point of believing that the world is antagonistic toward you. This sort of thinking is emblematic of the adolescent drive toward independence. But society is an abstract concept; it is not a conscious entity that is capable of expecting things from you in the same way a parent does.

When you have a "me vs world" attitude, it's easy to trap yourself in the position of victim, rather than see yourself as an agent of change. If you were to confront every real person in your life who expected something unreasonable from you and resolved those differences as constructively as possible, it's likely that the antagonism you feel from "society" would disappear.

In other words, this problem is to be resolved in the realm of the practical, in your actual relationships. Thinking about the problem through sweeping overgeneralizations about "society" at large doesn't help because it just makes you feel lonely, cynical, and, eventually, depressed.

(3) Oversimplistic View of Culture

As part of your overgeneralizing, you seem to be conflating culture and society; they aren't the same thing. Society refers to a large group of people that are held together by some kind of commonality. Culture refers to a specific set of beliefs, values, norms, and practices that a group of people share and honor. Culture is more related to ethics, in terms of prescribing what is/isn't acceptable behavior.

A society can contain several different cultures and subcultures when there is a higher level of commonality to link them together, such as nationality. Perhaps you haven't realized that society is big enough to house a variety of cultures. Maybe you have to look harder for your kind of people or create a community better suited for yourself.

Calling cultures "collectivist" or "individualist" is actually one of my pet peeves because of how it leads people to stereotype or make insulting assumptions. It is important to note that this terminology was coined by western intellectuals, some of whom had obvious prejudices against any "eastern" peoples living east of Germany. Also, contemporary research has not been able to find compelling evidence for the distinction except when using the most extreme cultures for comparison. In other words, these are outdated concepts. There are newer and more useful concepts available.

Yes, it is a fact that some cultures place more pressure and perhaps even try to coerce members into conformity. However, calling this kind of culture "collectivist" is misleading. It doesn't account for how people really feel, deep down, about the pressure. Go to a "collectivist" culture and you'll find plenty of people who are critical of it or even openly rebel against it. Go to any "individualist" culture and you'll find plenty of people who spend a lifetime conforming to mainstream standards. What does this tell you?

We are all individuals. As an individual, you have a choice to make about the degree to which you subscribe to and participate in your culture. And I use the word "degree" very intentionally because you seem to have trapped yourself in a false dichotomy.

Thinking in polarized either/or terms is a sign of intellectual immaturity at best and intellectual dishonesty at worst. It hampers good decision-making and can even lead to helplessness because you lose access to the full range of possibilities available to you. The choice does not come down to either: individual or group; respectable or shameful; security or poverty; etc. Most people actually live life with more nuance than that. You accuse others of lacking nuance but you are the same.

You're living through a rocky time of transition between adolescence and adulthood. The brain doesn't reach full maturity until around 25. Eighteen-year-olds still suffer from certain childish thought patterns. Children have a very small and narrow understanding of the world, only concerned about whether the world brings them pain or pleasure. However, as you grow up, you should start to realize more and more that: 1) the way the world works is much more complicated than simple dichotomies, and 2) your subjective experience is not necessarily representative of the larger objective world.

(4) Oversimplistic View of Economy

In 2024, there's no such thing as "absolute job security". And it's not the case that every job can be easily sorted into either "stable" or "unstable".

As an example, I live in an area that has traditionally been great for computer science and engineering. Many members of my immediate and extended family are engineers and I was pressured to become one. For the longest time and even now, both of these careers were touted by all parents and teachers as foolproof, always secure. But that is not the case today. The economy has changed and these jobs have been disappearing or moving to more favorable places. Today, every job opening has hundreds of applicants and even those with advanced degrees find themselves unemployed.

What this should teach you is that the work society considers to be valuable changes over time in accordance with economic shifts and needs, but the culture doesn't necessarily keep up with those changes. Once upon a time, business people were looked down upon as dirty, greedy, and selfish. But now look at all the people in Asia clamoring to get a business degree.

To be aware of economic changes, let alone try to predict them, requires expertise and imagination most people don't possess. That is why all they can do is stick to what is known or what has worked in the most recent past. Unless you live in North Korea, nobody knows for sure which direction the economy is going to go. It's not something within your control. However, you can learn enough about it to make some good guesses and take smart risks. You can take time to research the full range of career possibilities open to you and make an informed decision.

The more useful question to ask is: Are you able to find or create work that the economy values enough for you to build a fulfilling life? It is largely irrelevant what the culture thinks about it because they are always behind the curve. What matters most is whether you can contribute/create something valuable given the socioeconomic conditions you live under.

Opinions are just words; they need not mean anything unless you ascribe meaning to them. Everyone has an opinion but not all opinions are equally valid. If you want to make good decisions in life, you shouldn't be easily swayed by every opinion thrown at you, rather, you should only be swayed by opinions that are backed by solid expertise and evidence - this is what Ti development should help you with. In the end, the results will speak for themselves.

However, if you can't get over the adolescent mindset of reflexively rebelling against "expectations", you will always be overreacting to every opinion that comes your way (which is a recipe for getting stuck in tertiary loop). Even if you end up choosing a so-called "secure" career, the underlying inability to carefully analyze and evaluate the quality of the opinions you encounter (i.e. underdeveloped Ti) will nevertheless result in an unstable life.

#entp #auxiliary ti #tertiary fe #career #society #culture #values #adolescence #parent child relationship #alienation #cynicism #false dichotomy #critical thinking #ask

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cazort · 8 months ago

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How to Acclimate to The Heat Safely, and Why it is Beneficial To do So

Much of the eastern US is experiencing a heat wave accompanied by high humidity, and I unfortunately see a lot of people engaging in "avoidance" behaviors (staying inside in overly air-conditioned spaces nearly 100% of the time and avoiding any exercise) that might actually increase their risk of health problems like heat exhaustion or heat stroke.

If you have trouble coping with heat, you might benefit from intentionally and gradually acclimating yourself to heat. One way to do this effectively is to go on a walk (initially a short one) outdoors during the hottest time of the day, which is often around 4-6PM. If this is too uncomfortable, start earlier by walking outdoors earlier.

Make sure to ramp up your activity level and heat exposure gradually, stay adequately hydrated, and also make sure you have enough electrolytes. A simple way to do this is to drink a glass of water and eat a small amount of salty snacks and some fruit or veggies.

When you walk, it increases your body temperature. It's not super strenuous exercise, so it's not going to be exhausting or dangerous the way it might be to do something vigorous like running or vigorous cycling in the peak of the heat, but the combination of light exercise with exposure to heat is going to be enough to give your body quite a workout.

Over time you can walk more vigorously, but I recommend starting walking at a leisurely pace if you are unaccustomed to going out in extreme heat.

Your body adapts to heat in multiple ways. Your heart rate increases, and the efficiency of your circulatory system improves. Your body does things like dilating blood vessels more, but it also builds more capillaries (tiny blood vessels) close to the skin, which helps your body to pump heat to the skin. Your capacity for sweating also increases. This process takes a few weeks, so take care not to go from 0 to 100 while trying to acclimate to the heat.

When you start becoming heat-adapted you will notice that you start tolerating hotter and hotter temperatures. You might even start feeling cold at temperatures you once felt comfortable at. Like in the peak of summer, I feel cold when the air temperature gets as low as 75°F (~24°C) and feel totally comfortable at 78°F (~25.5°C) or even higher.

Here are some benefits to heat-acclimating:

You can set your thermostat higher, so your air conditioner operates less, and/or spend a greater portion of time not using your AC at all, which both saves money and protects the environment, and can sometimes improve air quality (indoor air quality is not always great in spaces that are always closed.)

Your aerobic fitness improves, to where your aerobic capacity will be higher than before when you return to exercising in normal or cooler temperatures.

Your risk of heat exhaustion or heat stroke is reduced.

You will be both more comfortable and safer in situations (like being outdoors or in indoor non-air-conditioned spaces) where you cannot control the heat.

You increase the range of activities that are comfortable and safe for you to do in hot weather, and thus help to make your life more enjoyable and a bit more stable or resilient in the face of heat waves or just generally hot weather.

Stay safe everyone. But recognize that avoidance is not the best strategy for dealing with summer heat or heat waves. If you isolate yourself in a heavily air-conditioned environment, you are not only wasting money, but you are weakening your body.

Keep in mind, we all have our limitations, and people with medical conditions may have a limited ability to acclimate to the heat. Listen to your body and make sure to ramp up gradually and take care to stay adequately hydrate and consume enough electrolytes.

But everyone can benefit to some degree from heat acclimation. And for those of us who sometimes have to be in situations where we are active and exposed to extreme heat, it's a necessity and we will ultimately be much safer and healthier if we train our bodies to adapt slowly and gradually. The highest risk of heat exposure comes when you are not acclimated to heat and then you are suddenly exposed to extreme heat! This is the worst case situation!

Protect yourself!

#heat wave #hot weather #heat exhaustion #heat stroke #fitness

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gen15gg · 8 months ago

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okay SO! these r a bunch of creloise fic ideas i came up w on the train ride home from uni bc am i not jus a girl who overthinks? w all the time in the world?? on a train???

so fair warning this is a LOT, but at least ik the old man sittin next to me was fairly entertained so u win some u lose some i suppose lmao 😭

- i def wanna see more 2000s or 90s AUs cuz duhhh i would love a little line ab them havin specific ringtones for each otha on their silly little flip phones (id cry if i saw this)

- OR OR OR clubbing scenes, meeting on the UNDERGROUND OMG!!!

(the trains that go under ldn for the americans idk if u lot kno what it is sorry, it’s like NYC subway??😭)

.. anyways cressida could always notice eloise reading something and tries to talk to her by either reading the same book or one journey jus offering the book “emma” (LIKE IN THE SHOW GUYS?!?) as a good read before she gets off on her stop OMDS and/or eloise always noticing cressida’s fashionable-ness for a fùckin 9-5 (yes cressida would be giving office siren absolutely) and maybe if the tables are turned, cressida is reading and eloise notices this and suddenly sparks up conversation bc she simply cannot shut her mouth (and replaying all the times she’s seen cressida in new outfits like the montage scene of anne hathaway in the devil wears prada LMFAO) n every tube journey they encounter each otha on, they go back n forth on their opinions on which eva book they’re reading atm OMGGGG n maybe on valentines one of them gives the otha a rose or a book before they get off SOMEONE RESTRAIN ME MY BRAIN IS WORKING OVERTIME 😭

- would also love to see more modern AUs in general like yes i loooove seein this pairing in different time periods, adapting to the ideas and limitations of that era MWAH to everyone who has been writing these i love you - let me kiss u on yo fùckin cranium MWAH !

- imagine a 1920s jazz girls creloise like idk who would be a jazz singer (maybe cressida??), havin them be in ‘flapper girl’ attire.. IDK id jus love to imagine them in that environment perhaps smoking from those thingies that held the cig itself

- not to stress this too much (i am) but i wanna see them as a 90s or def a 2000s famous pairing!! like both are singers!! i mean cmon cressida would hav an unbelievable stage presence w her amazing outfits we’ve seen in the show itself and eloise would be more punk-ish i suppose!!

or eloise remains a singer and cressida is a model?! but in both situations it’s like they despiseeee each otha or at least eloise does of cressida bc of her overall appearance and the message her looks send (i.e. similar to bridgerton era blah blah expectations etc)

but then they hav to date as a publicity stunt to push down rumours that they hate each otha or maybeeeee penelope is a news outlet they’re trying to get the jump on by going ‘noooo we don’t hate each otha we’re actually dating!’ (they do hate each otha but they fall in love obvs)

or penelope is one of their publicists and has set this up??.. or they’re forced to write a song together IDK this can go any which way but i was inspired by the song “maybe” by emma bunton as a song cressida would DEFINITELY sing OR “let me see” by Morcheeba

man idk Cressida jus gives me the vibe that in this AU she could be equivalent to kylie minogue or a brit pop icon of sorts regardless or Kate Moss if u went w the cressida as a model version AND MAYBE ELOISE AS A PHOTOGRAPHER??? IDK!!!!

- also NEED NEED. NEEEEED. a MR n MRS SMITH AU OF THEM!!!! like omdssss

(im referencing the original film w angelina jolie but go wild if one were to write this, which most like won’t happen but oh well 😭)

but omds the tension that would be between them both !!!! like eloise fits the playful goofy but intelligent character of mr smith, whilst i can most definitely see cressida in the role of mrs smith! trying her utmost best to keep things calculated and goin according to plan but (as u kno if you’ve watched the film) eloise will ruin this calculated streak she’s got 😭 OMDSSSS i can jus imagine their banter as they fight

- uhhh fuck me a surfer AU??? why not atp i’d love to see it where either teaches the otha to surf?? or it’s one where eloise is the one travelling around instead of colin (lmao #white girl goin on holiday to find herself) or w him as this would be a modern AU n she meets cressida somewhere in the mediterranean (bc cressida was sent away by her father) n yk sparks and whatnot ensue 🤭

or omds a rendition of that mermaid movie ‘aquamarine’ ??

- YES OMG A MERMAID AU GODDAMN WAITTTTT ELOISE ESCAPING PATRIARCHAL EXPECTATIONS BY PRETENTDING TO BE A PIRATE AND FALLING IN LOVE W MERMAID CRESSIDA OR THEYRE BOTH PIRATES??? LIKE ANNE BONNY AND MARY READ!!!

- jus had the biggest brain moment on this train ride me thinks… flowershop AU..

specifically an ‘imagine me & you’ AU. cressida had married some man ?? could be Debling to get her parents off her back but then falls in love at first sight of eloise the florist as she walks down the aisle to get married

omg i’m literally jus askin for creloise as ‘imagine me & you’ bc why not i think it’s adorable 😭

ANYWAYS!!! that’s ova but if anyone has any more ideas i’d love to hear them bc i hav serious brain rot from this pairing who will prolly not get togetha </3

#creloise brain rot real #very sorry this is so long #let me have fun #creloise #cressida cowper #eloise bridgerton #eloise x cressida #cressida x eloise #bridgerton #bridgerton season 3

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paingoes · 2 months ago

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What would LW!Lorelai and Aegean Seas Delta be like? Like if Delta's parents had gotten Lorelai instead of Paris.

oughhh good question!!!! i feel like ive already established lorelai as someone who needs a certain amount of conflict and action to thrive. this is true across both universes. the way Aegean Seas programming works is by traumatizing the students into requiring a certain amount of pressure to hold them together. they’ve adapted to extreme conditions and will decompress without them. like deep sea fish! this is part of why AS!paris is struggling so much.

i feel like lorelai might struggle with this even more? not so much a desire to be useful, but just a desire for something to happen. putting her in a peacetime nation feels like a cruel joke.

at the same time, a big reason canon lorelai seeks out conflict so much is because she was so sheltered growing up. AS!lorelai cannot say the same. so in the beginning, i imagine the change in environments is actually kind of welcome! shes got a deep appreciation for nature and would probably find the coastal setting very cool. i doubt she’s seen anything like it before.

additionally she lucks out with delta, who is not cruel and also not a creep! Aegean Seas isnt as patriarchal as canon but I imagine there’s still misogyny in that universe and so delta’s reaction to her arrival is not just like. “why the fuck would you buy a person” its also like. “why the fuck would you buy a GIRL??? thats sick. youre sick.”

so i think hes like. lightly creeped out by her being there and only calms down after observing her for a while. lorelai def gets hit w/ the benevolent misogyny whenever she’s in a whumpee position. delta probably feels less of a need to control her just because she’s not unstable or argumentative the way paris is.

she starts chafing after the first two months at around the same time he gets comfortable telling her what to do. its not the bossiness she necessarily minds, she’s used to it, kind of into it. its just that it feels like the things theyre doing are all futile and pointless. she resents delta for his position in the aristocratic and how hedonistic he is about everything. he does not take his position seriously at all and he doesnt dignify the real politics that affect everyone he rules over. its fucked up!

and she’s obviously not really doing it to spite delta. she just feels powerless and thats her outlet for it. but delta takes it fairly personally in a “can you stop acting like my mom” way at first that eventually turns into a “who the fuck do you think are?” way. will threaten to muzzle her.

i feel delta must sense on some level thats its very easy to cross lines with her and accidentally find yourself on the other side of something you cant come back from. AS!paris is kind of a kicked dog and AS!lorelai is…not. i think if you damage her trust, you’ve really damaged it, and things will not be the same afterwards. delta cares about her enough to want to avoid this. he still muzzles her ❤️‍🩹

i think her needling will get to him at some point and achieve net positive change in him. but her own boredom and sense of powerlessness will eat away at her until she becomes more reckless and volatile and boundary pushing. shes kind of giving scheming adviser here. takes advantage of her general respectability and guilelessness - “who, me?” - to get away with more and more direct involvement in statecraft and revolutionary signaling.

tl;dr lady macbeth? but like, nice.

#destroyer asks

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dailycharacteroption · 5 months ago

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Planar Tour Guide: Negative Energy Plane part 4

(art by Diehlal on DeviantArt)

Adventures

So throughout the week we’ve looked at the Negative Energy Plane, stared into the Void if you will, and seen not only that the plane itself is anathema to life as we understand it, and the creatures that can survive there are either monstrous undead or beings so utterly alien to the rest of the cosmos’ metaphysics that they cannot help but hate everything that isn’t them. And heck, they might even be justified in feeling that way.

With such a hostile environment, is there anything in this wide cosmos that would actually make a group of heroes want to go there? Let’s talk about it.

Much like the Positive Energy Plane, adventures on the plane are pretty much limited to rare minor negative zones until mid to high level when the planar adaptation spell becomes available. Not only that, but the nature of the plane’s magic makes healing more difficult, requiring extra stockpiles of healing items so as not to be dragged down by attrition. Once you’ve got the proper protections though, one can expect little to no respite or places to rest that the characters don’t bring with them, as pretty much every settlement is going to be occupied by hostile entities, or in rarer cases trapped mortals that struggle to get by as is. Luckily nothing prevents you from plane shifting out.

The easiest way to get your players into the void is to throw them in there yourself, by which I mean, some planar accident (which may or may not be the players’ fault) pulls them into the plane. At lower levels, this should probably end up with them in a minor-negative zone so it’s not just a “rocks fall, everyone dies” situation, but at higher levels where you know that at least one mage is packing planar adaptation or similar spells for emergencies, it could be anywhere you want. In any case, the adventure quickly becomes “find a way out”. Now obviously if the party knows plane shift this is no problem, but if they don’t, they may have to be clever, perhaps happening upon a movanic angel, or infiltrating a guarded portal.

However, maybe the party actually wants to leap into Entropy’s Heart, most likely hot on the heels of a villain fleeing into the plane to escape them and plot more villainous deeds where they assume no one will follow. Many a lich’s sinister planar castle lurks in the Void, so it certainly makes sense to take the adventure there to finish them off. This also covers situations where an invasion from the plane requires fending off and then following any retreating forces so they can’t come back with reinforcements later. Nightshades in particular are a good choice for villains of such adventures.

Just like how the Positive Energy Plane is useful for hiding away artifacts, so too is the Nothing for the same reasons, though the fact many residents are cruel enough to try and use such power for themselves makes it slightly less likely unless said artifact is dangerous to them. As such, artifact-focused adventures are more likely about retrieving the artifact than they are about hiding it away. Also consider that sphere’s of annihilation grow like fruit on this plane, so those seeking a weapon, or perhaps many might try to harvest the dangerous orbs.

Related to this is of course the search for rare materials, such as blight quartz, which can be made into weapons that sap the vitality from victims, as well as other esoteric ingredients made from the compressed entropy of the plane.

And of course, some may venture to the plane purely seeking knowledge. Lethal or not, those of a scientific mind may simply seek to study the plane and it’s secrets, braving the dangers to contribute to a greater understanding of the cosmos.

As we can see, there’s a shocking amount of potential in a plane that literally is filled with nothing, with plenty of opportunities for adventure. However, tomorrow we’ll bring everything to a close.

#pathfinder #planar tour guide #negative energy plane

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zodiactalks · 10 months ago

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These Zodiac Signs CANNOT HANDLE STRESS

It is said that stress is the disease of the 21st century, and while there might be some truth to it, people have experienced stressful situations for as long as people have been around.

Life itself can be pretty stressful, and we've all reached a point where too much is happening at the same time.

When faced with this situation, some people are capable of keeping their heads above water and solving things quickly and efficiently.

Others will stumble along the way but will find ways to resolve the problem after a while.

The following Zodiac signs, however? They'll either explode, implode, or a mix of both.

These are the Zodiac signs who just can't handle stress.

#1. Aries

It's easy to see self-assured and adaptable Aries as one of the most capable signs when it comes to dealing with stress, but the truth is they absolutely suck at it.

Sure, it takes a lot to get them genuinely stressed, which gives people the impression that they're unflappable, but the moment things get out of Aries's control, they genuinely don't know how to cope.

A stressed Aries will shut down and retreat, and in the worst cases, they'll go nuclear and self-sabotage, which will only make things worse for them.

Aries is many things, but being good at handling stress is not one of them.

#2. Gemini

If you thought Geminis were indecisive, wait until you see them stressed.

Geminis have very high standards for themselves, so they try their best to present a capable and unflappable exterior, and while they can be pretty indecisive even when at their best, they're usually good at handling it.

A stressed Gemini, however, won't even know where to begin fixing things and will grow more and more stressed until someone forces them to step away and relax.

A stressed Gemini will desperately attempt to fix the situation, but will often end up making it even worse for everyone involved.

#3. Virgo

Virgos can be nitpicky and critical in the best of times, but when they're stressed, they become a genuine nightmare.

They will criticize everything around them –including themselves– and will go on the offensive at the slightest inconvenience.

They're the kind of people who make their stress other people's problems, which in turn stresses everyone out, which stresses Virgo out until everyone around them is stressed and no one can accomplish anything.

A stressed Virgo is a Virgo that should be avoided if possible, and if you can't do that, then try your best to not take their bait.

#4. Libra

Is it really a surprise to see Libra here?

Libras are well-known for their need for peace and balance, so a stressful environment is not something Libra can tolerate.

Libras will go to absurd lengths to try to keep the peace, often sacrificing their own emotions and well-being in an attempt to get others to cooperate.

While this might solve things momentarily, Libra will hold a grudge about it, and they'll do it for a long time.

They won't explode or even talk about it, but if a Libra suddenly cuts you off their life, there's a good chance they considered you a stress factor.

#5. Scorpio

Scorpios are a strange case, as they can handle stress in their professional life, but they're absolutely incapable of dealing with it in a mature way when it comes to relationships.

Scorpios work hard to maintain their relationships, be they platonic or romantic, but if they feel stressed or like something is wrong, they'll take the most useless approach to resolve things.

They'll pull away.

A stressed Scorpio will become secretive and withdrawn, they'll give their partners and friends the cold shoulder, and will make solving things much harder than it should be.

#6. Aquarius

With a quick mind that's ideal for problem-solving, you'd think Aquarians would be great at handling stress, but that's just not the case.

That quick mind of theirs becomes a liability when it comes to high-stress situations, as they'll start overthinking absolutely everything.

They'll blow things out of proportion, start doubting other people's abilities, start doubting their own abilities and will second-guess and challenge anything other people attempt to do to fix the situation.

The best thing a stressed Aquarius can do is take a step back, take a deep breath and analyze the situation once they're feeling more relaxed.

#7. Pisces

Sweet, selfless, and very caring, Pisces has the unfortunate habit of playing the victim, and this becomes apparent when it comes to stressful situations.

When stressed, Pisces will refuse to take any responsibility and will blame everyone and everything for the mess they've made.

They'll be completely unable to listen to advice or take any kind of criticism, as they'll take everything as a personal attack.

Once things calm down, they'll go back to being their caring selves, but when they're stressed? Oh boy.

#Zodiac #Zodiac Signs #ZodiacFacts #astrology #astrology signs #Aquarius #Aries #Cancer #Capricorn #leo #libra #Sagittarius #Pisces #taurus #scorpio #Gemini #virgo

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smittenroses · 7 months ago

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— Drawn To

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Fandom No Straight Roads Pairing 1010/reader Chapter Summary Purl-hew likes science, and science is fact — he decides to study you to see how you drew them all in so easily

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Every animal had its habits, every animal had its way of surviving in the harsh living conditions of the planet earth, however, for humans, the way of surviving could be different from one another.

Some were born with the ability to stand over everyone else, becoming leaders and the people who got to decide the rules and regulations even if they do not have the best ideas in mind.

Some were born into situations that they cannot control, forced to either adapt or climb their way out of the situation and become more than what they were born as. Purl-hew liked the ones that worked for their living — they were humble, they were kinder, they were the type of people that didn’t scream and cry when they didn’t get their way, saying that all the issues in their life were the fault of others.

Even if he didn’t have to eat or drink, Purl-hew would tip the servers at restaurants they were forced to be at, watching their faces light up with every gift, he would volunteer to help charities to watch the faces of those less fortunate than himself light up.

It was like watching animals. Every human always being like an animal, falling into their basic instincts in order to survive. To study, to observe, to watch, people watching was his happy place. And his happy place just so happened to be in the home where he got to watch the human maid walk around, engaging with the residents like she just belonged there.

It was like a new queen being introduced to the hive, being fed sugar syrup by the nurse bees in order to flourish underneath the strange environment. Growing used to the pheromones of the new queen, the workers would find themselves thinking that the stranger had grown within the hive, unable to tell that she was a stranger to begin with.

Yet, this queen bee didn’t come with the knowledge of a handler that looked after her to bloom, nor had she been there long to know the entire layout of the hive, instead, this strange variable, the non fan that somehow was able to worm her way into the swarm.

Even with the people watching and the understanding of all the animals known to living kind, he just couldn’t put a finger on how she was able to fit in so well.

Maybe that was what compelled him to follow after the maid as she walked around the halls, clutching the book of animal behaviour under his arm as a form of superficial comfort as he watched her. It was mundane, watching as she cleaned windows, but, it was like she was in her element completely, taking her time as she hummed a soft tune under her breath.

Mimicking the tune, Purl-hew began to sing along softly, listening as their voices blended together in the warm halls, watching as her eye slipped over to his position, her hands not once stopping their movements, only slowed, as she turned her head over to him.

“Are you just going to stand over there, Purl-hew?”

Why did his feet feel so heavy as he dragged himself over to her position, why did he feel like there was a lump in his throat that shouldn’t be there when he could not eat nor needed to push out air to speak? It was like the bumble bee had taken over his thoughts and body, forcing it to feel ways that he had never felt before. He was meant to make her fall for him, just like the bet had been — it wasn’t meant to be the other way around, yet, he found himself being drawn to the human that now stood before him, watching the way the Malaysian sun sparkled through the windows and made her eyes twinkle in a way that he could only compare to a bee, her eyes dazzling in every way.

Her eyes tracked down his body and he couldn’t help but hold his non-existent breath, feeling the way she studied him just as he studied her, with so much attention to every detail of what he wore and the very book he held in his arms. Placing down the cloth and the spray she had been holding, she slowly picked the book from his arms, feeling the heat through the prosthetic skin as she flipped to where he last bookmarked, eyes scanning the pages as if it were just something she picked up randomly.

“Did you know bees engage in play?” Bee said, sending his system into a reboot momentarily. He had to blink a few times as he stared down at Bee, processing what he just heard, yet, the twinkle in her eye was nothing mean or mischievous, instead, it was comforting, kind even, as she passed back the book, Purl-hew holding it close to his chest as he began to listen to her ramblings.

Yet, his mind was stuck on the fact she gave. It was true, it had been observed in the animal kingdom that even a creature as hard-working as bees liked to engage in play outside of their work. There were always so many in the hive that they were able to rotate shifts, that they were able to look after the queen and the hive without even as much of a break between the different bees, yet, the bee that stood in front of him now with her mouth rambling, not even aware that he wasn’t processing anything she said, what could be considered play to her when there was only one?

Could it be the times he had found her in the kitchen, using the equipment to her heart’s content when she had been working hard and needed to have her lunch, being the same lunch that he had seen Neon J sit by her to talk about his days before music?

Was it how she seemed to effortlessly blend in with his family and be a part of them, joining in on the things they did behind the scenes so that they could be themselves?

Was it the fact that she was so effortlessly able to talk to them as if they were living people?

Yet, his mind focused on the one thing he remembered, having caught the Bee when she was the most vulnerable when she had been nodding off at the table polishing silverware. He still wasn’t so sure why he had stayed there that day, watching her from the doorway as she struggled to keep her eyes focused and her hands busy. It was an effort that stuck with him, yet, it had been such a human reaction to want to keep working when one was at work.

When you didn’t have a hive to support you, he supposed that you too would find yourself exhausted.

Yet, she had unknowingly made a hive by herself, her sweet words and actions, treating them more than just entertainment… it had been the very same sugar syrup that made the hive loyal to their queen and she had been feeding that same syrup to them seamlessly from the palm of her hand.

“When a new queen needs to be introduced to the hive to ensure its survival,” Purl-hew began, watching as Bee silenced herself to listen to him speak, “Keepers will integrate them into the hive, usually with the aid of sugary treats that can be eaten away by the workers and the new queen so that they don’t see her as an intruder.”

“It’s like introducing a new pet!”

Purl-hew wasn’t sure if he would call the human standing before him a pet, but, yet her personality brought joy to the halls, knowing that if he were human, he would huff out a laugh of amusement at her comment. She had attempted to stay out of their hair originally, she had tried, but… Shaking his head, he couldn’t help but mutter, “Queen bee…”

It caught her attention, Bee staring up at the blue 1010 for a moment before he processed what he just said, feeling his inner workings grow warm as his fans kicked into overtime to cool down. He hadn’t meant to say it out loud — he usually had a better control of his programming than that, but, the tiny little smile was worth it, listening to the bells in her voice ring as she laughed.

“What about them?”

“Nothing,” He couldn’t help but laugh a little in response, shaking his head, “I suppose I was making another comparison about them while we were talking.”

Her laughter grew, infectious in its nature and full from her belly, one that made his shoulders shake slightly as he began to laugh with her, too. “We’ve just been talking about bees,” She laughed, eyes squinting with her smile, “Are you going to take up beekeeping? Am I going to have to honey up Neon J to let you have some on the property?”

While the thought was nice to be able to observe bees up close, Purl-hew shook his head instead as the laughter died down, reaching a hand toward Bee to wipe away a strap tear that streaked down her face.

“No need,” He chuckled, fingers once more returning back to the book he held in his arms. He already had one hive he wanted to take care of.

#nsr #no straight roads #nsr x reader #no straight roads x reader #nsr 1010 #nsr 1010 x reader

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