#so. ill deal with it tomorrow ! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

triglycercule · 2 months ago

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horror is so BLESSED he's the only one out of the murder time trio that has actual good people trying to influence his story 💔💔 dust and killer were both driven to INSANITY because of the choices of their respective humans but horror??? every time without FAIL the polls for horrortale's plotline have always ended in a good place for aliza (either by bettering her relationships/reputation or for her to just. not DIE)

horrortale's potential alternate timelines my beLOVEd🙏🙏 they're SO lucky that we're being kind and benevolent hehe (≧ω≦) now where are the aus based off the possible different outcomes that could've happened in horrortale HUH???? (like how aliza couldve killed toriel or chosen horror's puzzle or gone with undyne to the core........)

#something something all three of them have their fates determined by an outside force #ermmmm but horror doesn't- yeah he does. what aliza does decides EVERYTHING for horror and horrortale #just because its not direct like dust or killer doesn't mean theyre all subject to the same community x3 #PARALLELS MTT PARALLELS FOR THE 500TH TIME THEY HAVE SOOOO MANY PARALLELS OHHH MY GOOOOOODDDDDD #mtt going to visit horrortale would just be dust eying aliza (out of paranoia. he knows shes a good kid)#and then killer knowing in his head that the poor kid aliza that horror weirdly seems to like doesn't have control over her actions #she doesn't know horror doesn't know nobody knows except killer. is that a bit sad?#theyre all living in the dark unaware of the reality of their world. i mean thats how its meant to be after all thats what the players want #but....... it would be tempting to tell horror...... hehehehehe- and then he's interrupted by horror and dust #(theyre trying to get killer to eat papyrus's spaghetti in their place. he's the only one that can stomach it even though there's no human)#mtt i love thee SOOOOO much. theyre back in horrortale for the holidays ✨✨ coming back to visit the family ✨✨ WHAT horror's visiting.......#not dust or killer of course. this isnt their world noooope thats not papyrus. but that doesn't stop dust from having everyone like him #its just like the good old days :333 except now there's three sanses and triple the insanity :333 almost like nothing's changed!!!!!#oh killer??? yeah he's there. probably won't try taking up the sansish type of role horror and dust do but he'll find a way to get used 2 i #after all the point of this is whatever he wants it to be now ;33333 were these tags all just a reference to my mtt fic. yes. yes they were #LMAOOOO i forgot that aliza didn't fall into horrortale yet in my fic. still a fun thing to imagine tho!!!#i think it would be fun having aliza be the first of humans for horrortale to deal with that they won't instantly kill #itll be hard but really rewarding for all of them........ especially horror i believe!!! man he didnt even go through therapy but #just being away from horrortale and out doing new and FUN and NOT MURDEROUS things has done wonders for him :3 #i need to get to writing smh..... winter break is the day after tomorrow (TECHNICALLY AT 2:32 PM SINCE THSYS WHEN SCHOOL ENDS SO HAHAHA)#so ill probably work on it more over break since i'll have nothing to do hehe.......#today was an amazing day for me ✨ TWO mtt angst death related hcs..... some work on my latest chapter i've yet to post..... SWAPINVERSE FAN #ARE YOU KIDDING ME MORR SWAPINVERSE ART THIS IS SOOOO AMAZING THABK YOU UNTITLED29876011111 I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY YOU DO THIS!!!!!#tricule rant #killer sans #dust sans #horror sans #murder time trio #utmv #sans au

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iraprince · 2 years ago

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well! i've exited my 20s. not gonna get goopy or graphic about it but this is a big deal for me bc for the vast majority of my life i did not think i was gonna get this far. now like once a day i distinctly have the thought "i'm so fucking glad i didn't kill myself"

i feel weird of course but im also really excited for my 30s. im excited to enjoy my marriage and to become better friends with myself and to make more art. thanks for being here and for being kind to me

#cw suicide mention #in past years i have requested no birthday greetings for personal trauma reasons #but ive been kind of trying to like. wean myself off that gently. bc i dont want to be sensitive abt/scared of my bday forever #so this year like. let em rip. i think its fine #also tumblr will not let me edit my pinned. im gonna be irritated if i have to remake it lmao. but ill deal w that tomorrow

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doyoulikethis-vocaloid-song · 7 months ago

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So sorry for the delays! I've been packing + moving this weekend and completely lost track of the days. As soon as I'm settled and ready to go I'll post the next round of polls, so expect those tonight! Very very sorry again 🙏

#not a poll #i also completely missed the splatfest despite looking forward to it for months but WHATEVER that's less of a big deal lol #the movers scheduled to arrive a day earlier than expected (today) so i spent all of yesterday running around #and im still not done 💔#BUT! Again ill get those polls up before tomorrow night trust

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angelpuns · 9 months ago

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Raughhh I'm fine rn but frustrating to think that I haven't been able to like - just relax and enjoy things lately cause I'm too busy overthinking and having a constant anxiety attack ( exaggeration ) about nothing

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elliscousland · 2 months ago

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twirling my hair thinking abt the threads tht i have in my drafts tht have taken months to get to

#ooc.#tbd.#its what i do #its my ~ flavor ~#however i havent slept / have busted out a bunch of first drafts #ill straighten them up over the next few days methinks #it's been my first christmas in a long time w my brothers so i just havent really been prioritizing tumblr #they go home on the second then i should be going back to business as usual #it'll only take ONE month instead of three LMAO #i've also been like traveling this year which has made me put online things on the backburner #+ there were other things i was dealing w & still am #which im not sorry for but like this is just my rambling I want to write more than i have time to lmao #i did just start all of the epic starters / some memes #but my first drafts always rough so i dont post them right away #especially w no sleep in me who knows what tomorrow me will think of them LMAO

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phagodyke · 4 months ago

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the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

#struggling to tolerate this one ngl its fucking dire this weekend. i just cant do this man #thr things i would fucking do for attention please. just one person to notice and care in the slighest i feel like im losing my fucking #mind out here how does every single person who has ever mattered to me in my lifr see me in distress and choose to ignore it or maybe they #dont even recognise im ij distress in the first place i dont know whats worse i dont think i hide it well at all im just so done #listen like ultimately its fucking fine. i will get myself through it like ive gotten myself through everything else in my fuckijg life #i dont even feel bad that often these days im doing so so so much better and its so much more tolerable to only have to deal with this #once or twice a week instead of it being a struggle every single day like i dont think i could go back to feeling like that again ever i #dont know how i managed to get througyh it before jesus fucking christ. but i can deal with it i can deal with this #ik ill feel fine tomorrow. its just thr fact im so desperately fucking alone with it that makes it so much worse than it has to be #i fucking hate repression i hate being so incapable of expressing myself that its easier for me to injure myself than it is to talk about #how i feel to anyone i hate being trapped in this stupif fucking torture labyrinth and not knowing how to get out of it and never being #given a single avenue anything to hold onto i hate having to do it alone every single fucking time and when i do try i just freeze out #entirely i cant form a coherent thought my brain enters total fucking shutdown pure static white noise fuzz and i dont know why please #its so unfair i dont think its that much to want a little comfort. just once just for someone to stay with me while i cry it doesnt have #to be more than that i just dont want to be alone like this i just want to feel safe around someone just close to someone just once #and well ill survive without it bc i always have i guess. so far at least. and there are many things im grateful for and i do in general #feel pretty okay my life is pretty good at times even. i feel so pathetic and stupid and ashamed for even feeling like this #but do i have to go my entire life without ever experiencing any kind of real intimacy with another person emotionally that is #i mean physical is nice too and they go hand in hand in some ways but i just want to feel seen and safe over anything.im tired #i feel like i try.but not hard enough i know its all my fault really but i dont know how to try any harder but nothing will ever change if #i dont i cant expect anyone to do anything if i cant rven communicate in thr first place. oh i dont want to think about it anymore #i have a headache from crhing and its not even 8pm ugh. okay. well it is what it is.#ill breathe until i calm down and then tidy up whatever i left in the kitchen and get my work stuff ready for tmr #and polish my boots maybe. and read and go to bed at 9:30 i think. and ill feel fine in the morning #my fault for thinking about it earlier i know i shouldve nipped it earlier on its such an easy spiral to fall into i need to get better #it happens. okay anyway. no cause for concern im good guys. weakly thumbs up at the camera all covered in blood #my period is late actually thats probably all this is lmao. makes sense thinking abt it #cant wait for it to finally start and all earthly desire to leave my body so i never experience pain again amen #.vent #ignore this sorry for being mentally ill im not even that mentally ill anymore so no excuse rly ummmm. bit embarrassing innit.

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harryshomebaby · 4 months ago

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all of a sudden today everything has kind of just gone silent in my corner of the internet and my friends aren’t on their phones anymore and now im alone

#i am better than i was yesterday but im still just feeling so heavy and bad and like i can’t do anything but think about this #this is gonna stick with me for a long time but i hope by tomorrow i can start moving forward a little more #everything is just quiet now and i have to deal with the very real fact that this happened and nothing can be changed #its a new reality now and im having trouble accepting it #but ill be fine #its just very quiet today as everyone processes this on their own #I know this isn’t true at all but now that it’s quieter i feel like everyone has already moved on and im the last one still in the trenches #that big sense of community we all felt the last two days has already fallen away at least in my corner of the internet #now its just normal�� which hurts #anyway. i think ill watch this is us soon for some nostalgia and coping cause i need to grieve a little more #hope everyone is doing okay today #one direction #liam payne

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gaylightisminetocommand · 28 days ago

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#im not looking for sympathy or anything with this post i just need to fucking say something #but i don't want to dump it all on one person #or even multiple people #because idk what i'd do #or what i'd say to someone in this situation #'just keep going' is all well and good but it only works for so long #so i don't expect anyone to try and deal with this #i wouldn't want them to #because it's fucking stressful #so this is just. screaming into the void.#but uh #fuck #im not ok and idk what to do #dont worry ill be fine #ill still be here tomorrow #and the next day #and the next day and the next day #cause im like a fucking cockroach #living out of spite #but im so fucking sick of feeling like this all the time #im so fucking sick of having no energy or motivation and feeling like my life is gonna go nowhere #im so sick of just. hurting all the time.#it hurts so much #vent post #tw vent #im gonna tag this shit from now on #cause i understand why ppl might not wanna see it #cause there's enough depressing shit going on right now #and if you saw this im sorry and it's not your responsibility to deal with this 🫂#go drink water and take care of yourself

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sea-buns · 1 year ago

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but what if i dont WANNA watch the new d20 ep. what if im SCARED.

#even tho ive shaken off the itchy feelings of the last one i know its just gonna be the same cycle every week #we revisit some trauma. we forget. we return for laughs. it continues.#i mean theres no way im NOT watching it lol #just dont know if i wanna deal with all that when im already so tired. plus i still need to watch the last ap #so eh either today or tomorrow. maybe ill split it who knows what the adhd will decide #dimension 20 #d20 #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #sea rambles

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ganondoodle · 1 year ago

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sorry about that last rambling post, i didnt mean to sound like its worse than it may be, but i got no ... lense to view it through but my own, and the main reason i wrote it out anyway was bc i needed to get it out (even if posting it might be not the greatest idea) .. and bc it kinda showcases, i think, how my stories kinda write themselves, involuntarily in a way? its not like im not putting in any effort- but its like .. i cant STOP it always keeps going and even the dumbest idea stays in some form, its very hard to get everything in place bc theres so much going on all the while i am very slow at making anything, writing or drawing anything, especially anythign coherent is very hard bc not only do i get constantly distracted, i get distracted by my own thoughts suddendly skipping to a certain scene and me having to go throguh imagining in detail NO MATTER how many times i have done it before for the same scene that i already decided on how it goes, when theres a new idea it can take over my entire day bc i cant let go of it-

not trying to sound either like im the only that has that sort of problem, but i think its a big part as of why i start tso many projects without being able to finish them, or even start them bc i constantly have to fight my own thoughts from derailing into another daydream session, thinking of too much too fast than i can ever draw or even write about and not knowing what is worthwhile and what isnt (im telling you i have no idea what is good and what isnt, idk why but for all i know all things i do could be trash, or they all could be bad, maybe the one i thinnk is decent is actually worse than the things i deem not good enough and once i start to think no this isnt good enough i stop having fun making or thinking it bc im trying to do better

honestly its kind of impressive that i can get anything out at all, not to pat myself on the back there but even if i hate how long it takes me, considering how much im having to work just to start working on something at all, the fact that i could post stuff coherent enough for some people to understand AND LIKE is something i should be a little more proud of

#ganondoodles talks #personal #sorry today is a bit of a brain fart day #got a headache and have wasted the entire time until now (5pm) with watching old analysis videos i have watched 5 times already #and crying over undertales music #how much could i get done if i didnt have to deal with thought trains going 200 above speed limit #also didnt mean to sound mean to people who like the things i deem cringy #BC I DONT KNOW WHAT IM TALKIGN ABOUT 90% OF THE TIME #I DONT KNOW IF ITS GOOD maybe it is #my judgement of my own stuff is pretty random #.... maybe thats why i can work with fanstuff that adheres to lore better #bc it sets limits for me #it gives me options of rails to derail onto without falling straight into the woods #idk if that made sense either #... i need to start drinking more #(and i guess by calling some of my stuff cringe bc i am entirely unsure of its quality im trying to make myself smaller than i am)#(so if it turns out to be actually bad- im more safe from ridicule since LOOK I AM SELF AWARE)#and there i go letting my thoughts spin further #maybe ill delete both of these posts tomorrow when i realize how dumb this is to say in the first place

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lemon-wedges · 6 months ago

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#havening trouble falling asleep and i KNOW anything i think about right now is just blown out of proportion #but genuinely not looking forward to my grandfather coming home tomorrow #living with him stresses me out so much #in some fucked up way im glad he wasnt here when kevin died #i cant imagine those first few days of grief having to also deal with him #i guess im just afraid that whatever progress ive gone thru is going to get lost the moment he comes #or if i trigger myself i wont be able to handle it as well #sigh #i know ill just have to take it as it comes

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fantabulisticity · 26 days ago

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I feel the same as yesterday, but my Covid home test was negative, so hopefully it's just a regular cold!

#and the ear congestion is back :( it was mild when i first woke up but now my entire left ear is clogged :(#i think the cold medicine will help though. it helped yesterday and the night before.#personal #illness #also. this DOES mean i have to stay home and can't go to karaoke tonight :((((((((#my friend is having a get-together tomorrow and i don't know if i'll be able to go to that either. hopefully i feel better tomorrow.#but at least i'm sick over a weekend so i don't have to use a bunch of sick time at work.#and it's fairly mild. i'm not comfortable but i'm not totally miserable. i can deal with congestion as long as i'm not moving a lot.#my sore throat went away on the first day and all the nausea was motion sickness. my stomach feels fine after being on the ground.#and hopefully getting lots of rest and hydrating and eating spinach and orange juice will help me recover before Monday.

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mypeggableromance · 4 months ago

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#hhhhh I'll probably delete this later but if i don't physically put these thoughts somewhere I'll maybe explode.#but fuck man. shit sucks fr! I highkey think I can't go to work tomorrow but yknow how it goes!!!!#I'm caught somewhere between finally being taken seriously about my health issues #and having the most wretched mental health crisis #like on one hand fantastic! I'm being taken seriously now its gotten to the point where I cant fucking walk normally #but on the other hand oh my god holy shit. i had to get this bad???? and I'm worried. i know theres shit so much bigger than me rn going on #but I'm worried about my health. especially when I've been trying to deal with it for the better part of like.... 5 years #since i was 19!!!!#I'm 24 and worrying about whether or not I'll actually walk about with 0 pain ever again isn't that fucked.#so that's bittersweet. ive got physio tomorrow. blood tests next week #an ultrasound coming up #its ultimately a good thing im being taken seriously. if not a terrifying acceptance that everything ive been feeling has been real and #well. bad.#and like with this right is the crash of my mental health. just a fuckin nosedive man.#i have a relatively stressful job i felt out of my depth about and thus guilty for but now its a role that I've approached in constant pain #for the last few months.#i can't deal with that actually! lots of stress! lots of pain! lots of mental pain over my physical condition! my job grinding my soul!#aaaaa!!!!!!!#like i dont WANT to be unemployed either #I'd much rather be uhhhh employed! and able to save money towards actually getting Help™#but I've got to admit that i hurt too much. and its consuming my whole fucking brain.#but I'll go on #ive got my first trip out the country solo next week!! im heading to san Fransisco!!! im excited.#but I'm worried for the inevitable moment where my pains catch up with me #ill surpress it while I'm out there. try and remind myself to have a good time. return to the uk and feel a weeks worth of pain #and even THAT sucks to consider #but i should stop #rambles

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courtillyy · 9 days ago

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projects actually can be fun how about that ?

#astro talks #dude if i had been in ritalin when writing my stranger things fic... my goddd #i literally only finished (after many breaks) bc i had such love for it. like an immense connection to it and just coudlnt let it end badly #but it brought me so much mental pain just to do it. and i ddint understand !!#dude.... yeah.#choosing the icon for the sideblog now :) gonna use one of chilleds emotes #like i dont want to show bias but like pr1 kinda does have him at the center. if not just for a way to explain how theyre all associated #also if i was showing bias i would do speedy lol #its a dinosaur with his hat and a love heart. felt appropriate for a shipping thing #and ill like make the blog pinned page. and start on teh submission form #which ill try to have out tomorrow #and then maybe a week? or two of submissions?#maybe open ended for a bit.#but yeah my dudes this is happening ! hell yeah :)#and i have most of my little degrassi fic done for today #its just kinda vibes and thoughts but that can be ok #and i might have smth up tmr for it. but bc i have changed it to aprox a fic a day #i can skip if needed. we will see :D #hell yeah !#dude being on disability benefits can kinda make u feel like a useless piece of shit to the world #(or at least it has for me at times. but rn. i just feel really good about myself and thats so nice)#god u read about how undiagnosed/unmedicated adhd ruins ppls lives... but like wow #i assumed even if i did have adhd. it woudlnt be that big of a deal. bc i have all my other shit as well. but dude no.#it was so much more debilitating than i could have known #anyways <3 projects yay :)

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milo-is-rambling · 10 months ago

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I can’t even imagine living without anxiety. Like. How. What?

#I mean if I woke up tomorrow with a normal amount of anxiety it would be a shocking difference to my daily life. and I am medicated!!! like.#what? am I missing something here?#my mom tells me that meds can only do so much and that they’re really just meant to make it so you can get out of bed every day #but now I’m wondering like is that true or is that my mom is on the wrong dose herself and something could be done to help us both #gahhhhh idk I just feel helpless bc I’m scared of making big changes and the big changes have to make are scary and large and I need a #bulleted list made of things I can do (and break down into very small steps) to actually progress in a positive way in my life instead of #being SO afraid and SO stagnant. it’s been six months since (ptsd diagnosis causing thing) and I don’t feel like I’ve made any progress even #with a therapist. I’m working towards a more intensive program but I feel like it’s almost making me feel more alienated bc I’d have to like #go be surrounded by other mentally ill people and medical people which brings dad dying trauma and like I know I’m running from it bc I’m #afraid to face the changes I need to make and the feelings that are going to come up but fuck man can’t I get some fucking meds that make #this easier to deal with!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! grief and ptsd and long term isolation and anxiety and chronic pain like fuck it’s #so exhausting!!!! I feel like I’m fucking fighting thru life and then from the outside it’s like I’m doing nothing cause I stay in my room #and get stoned and play animal crossing and watch tv and cry and over eat and sometimes I drive around in circles so I can scream sing until #my throat burns and I get a headache and everything finally quiets down in my head for a second. I know I look like I’m doing nothing and #that’s because I am doing nothing but waiting for the next time a mental health professional will talk to me for an hour like it’s so sad #anyways. you ever take a big dab and then start crying and type all of this like it’s an epiphany even tho it’s things you already know.#honestly crying in front of the air conditioner is so slay slight breeze over my face cooling the tears the white noise calming me down

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hballegro · 21 days ago

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ok before I go to bed legally I have to finish this one thing I'm writing. Its been months. I have like at least 5 people that want to read this. I simply Gotta

#god i hope i get it. i hope i get it so on so on #thats the theme tonight. i shower and then write for an hour. thats the deal #if i do it ill get myself ice cream tomorrow

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