#so you all get to cry too
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"Maybe two kids with a bunch of missing pieces don't make each other whole..."
"...Maybe they just empty each other out more."
#hello neighbor#nicky roth#aaron peterson#hello neighbor books#can you tell this scene made me cry?#hello neighbor fanart#hello neighbor art#drawing#artist#digital art#artists on tumblr#these books have emotionally devestated me#so you all get to cry too
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REPLICA PLAYLIST
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/60c59cba7fa494e1419d41d7b408f341/fb0033c60dac976d-80/s540x810/c80ad0e543642e34e2aae1fe92954c0bbcde5dde.jpg)
MUSIC UNDER CUT
I have been receiving requests for any songs that inspired Replica, so here, have my personal playlist. Sorry it’s not Spotify/Soundcloud but they don’t have some of these songs available so uh… guess you’re stuck with YouTube vids. For fun I'll include my personal titles for them (which might give a few hints of what to expect in the future/end).
Replica Main Theme - “Die for You” by Grabbitz Like Father Like Son Like Brother (Omega and Shelldon) - "As Above So Below" by Alistair Lindsay Mikey's Theme / The 1st Vision - "Suzume no Tojimari" by Nanoka Hara Military (Mad) Dogs / Central Park Colony - "Imperium" by Madeon Shanghai - "Icarus" by Madeon Boom Goes the Donnie-mite (Mikey/Donnie vs the Sweeper) - "The Red Zone" by Mitsuoto Suzuki The Day the Sky Bled Red - "7 Seconds Till the End" by Nobuo Uematsu Going Out Like a Boss (Raph and Leo) - "Agape" by Nicholas Britell Remembering the Right Way (Mikey and Leo) - "The Souls of Many" - by Alistair Lindsay Mystic Hands / The 2nd Vision - "Am I Dreaming" by Metro Boomin x A$AP Book 2 Trailer - "Sea Dragon" by Covet 7 Years Later - "Iron" by Woodkid Leo's Theme / Attack on the Labor Camp - "Ego Death" by Polyphia Omega's Theme - "Touch" by Daft Punk Flat Lines (Omega Alone) - "Die Toteninsel Emptiness" by 1000 Eyes Spear - "Monsters" by Tommee Profitt Final Protocol - "The Kraken" by Katie Dey Rise / Epilogue - "Close in the Distance" by Masayoshi Soken & Tom Mills
I will admit, it's a little embarrassing since you can easily see the patterns of what I've been listening to for the past year or two. I swear I listen to more than just videogame OSTs, these songs just jive well with the story and I often find lyrics distracting when brainstorming scenes. Regardless, the music I listen to is such an important part of my creative process and some of these songs really defined the scenes I now have locked in my head. So I figured it was only fair to give them the credit they're due.
I will continue to add to this playlist, and will note in comic updates when one of these songs is applicable!
#lofi Donnie anyone?#also sort of celebration for 19k followers wow#should I do something else for it?#I particularly like Leo's theme being titled Ego Death#very fitting#Also the final song makes me cry because the lyrics are just too dang perfect#I'd like to do an animatic with the song when this story is all done#check out the lyrics if you get the chance#in fact I'd like to do an animatic trailer for the Book 2 Teaser#we'll see though#i can't allow myself to get too distracted from the comic itself haha#replica#rottmnt replica#kathaynesart#playlist#music#spoilers? but like... you know how it ends in the movie so not really?#kind of?#did you see the rise movie?#then you’ve been spoiled sorry#posting again at an ungodly hour#I am tired#save rottmnt#rottmnt#TMNT#Donatello#casey jones
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can't believe im saying this but long time no megumi
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jjk megumi#jjk art#am i getting my speed back or am i just procrastinating what im Actually supposed to me doing the answer may surprise u#regardless i realized i havent drawn megu properly since waaaaay pre-halloween and i was feeling the withdrawals#i wanted to get a handle on this newish render style with yuuji first bc i think the lighter hair forces me to know what im doing#vs with black u can hide things a lot better so its easy to play it safe and revert 2 usual habits#so im rly happy i did yuuji first bc these bruise-y colours on megumi's hair look SO good i cld cry#im rly enjoying this thing where i put whatever colour down wherever without worrying abt being too precious with it#the bright neon salmons the dusty purples the olive greens these r all colours i would not normally turn to#esp fr skin#but its so FUN it makes the lighting so fun and saturated and interesting to look at#overall this ws nowhere near as meticulous or 'clean' as the yuuji draws but i didnt needit to b so its ok#this ws just an afternoon#n i just needed to draw megumi :'> i abandoned my boy..........#yall im having fun drawing again pro tip if u feel stuck Do New Things#yet another lesson you think i wld have Retained after 21 years of drawing
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i listen to fog lake too much
#falls through the ceiling with a mighty crash hello#it's been what...8 months?#I was too busy w uni and being mentally ill#thank u everyone so much for the tags on all prev posts.. i re-read them oaccasionally 💗#they make me v happy thank u for giving me a moment of ur time#that means so much#anyway! vashwood!!#i hate them so much#i want to eat them#i want to ugly cry#i want an ideal world where they could've had something for a little bit#im eating drywall and pacing around the room in a cold sweat#so trimax-atypical overt intimacy it is#more coming...in maybe another year#It's a big project!#to me. yeah#my dream is to be put in a terrarium for a while#if only u knew how many wips I have w vashwood..#maybe i'll get tired and pile them into one post all unfinished and no less ok for it yk#whatever u r doing doesn't need to be perfect to make someone happy#didn't u experience a positive little zap from my imperfect colored doodle rn?#what a speedrun of a drawing that was#(<spent 10h on it. that's the minimum for anything ever)#hope today is treating you well! so long stranger!#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trimax#trigun#tzarrz
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something people just don’t think about is how often chronically ill and disabled people just don’t have access to good food. not healthy food, good food; well made, tasty meals that don’t come from a jar or a freezer. how many of us are housebound or can’t drive? delivery services only offer within certain distances, if you live outside a city they aren’t an option. many people don’t have the energy or ability to cook for themselves if they have the skill to begin with. many certainly don’t have the ability to learn how. it’s something that goes completely unnoticed, just the opportunity to have a good meal and how much that wears you down
#all i want is chinese food#the closest one to me is 40 minutes away and its a /bad/ chinese place#its my worst option and its not even an option#‘fried rice is easy to make heres a recipe!’#i cant use a stove bc the heat will give me a seizure#even if i keep myself cool something that should take 15 minutes will take upwards of an hour bc i need to take breaks#even then ill probably be too nauseous to eat it after being active for so long#all of that for a bad cooks version of fried rice#more expensive and worse than a takeaway place#but i cant get it from a takeaway place#repeat ad nauseum for the rest of my life and is it any wonder im so sick of the same food ive eaten for 10 years#the only time i get takeaway is when my parents decide to go out and bring something home#can you imagine living like that for the rest of your life?#i dont have to#and its so dumb to want to cry over rice#but its not really about the rice is it#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#spoonie#chronic illness#disability#pots#postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome#ehlers danlos syndrome#fibromyalgia#chronic fatigue#chronically ill#mental illness#mental health#save post
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It’s about this time, another voice pushes into your head, like a bat out of hell.
#critical role#cr lb#ygifs#cr3#WHAT IF I CRY#jester#imogen#sensory overload imogen Finally getting her own jester sending as jester is firing all her slots to talk to her ok girls...........#jesters like ok ok ok so I can’t send anymore messages but I was talking to this really cowboy girl fjord do you know her and he's like#she was talking about lake umami and jester makes eyebrows and jester immediately tries sending again and gets psychic coldcocked again#but do you think about how hard imogen woulda fallen for this bubbly tiefling had they known eachother cos I sure will ok fine#LAURA GETTIN EMOTIONAL GIRL ME TOO
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Remember: The burning sensation is part of the process.
#Mouthwashing#blood#body horror#Emphasizing here that this is in reference to a media and character and not a cry for help on my end.#Mouthwashing is one of those games that tickles my brain and checks all the boxes for my niche interests -#-but it wasn't something that got the silly comic part in my cortex firing up. My analysis brain is eating well though!#What said...It is impossible for me to see this scene and not say out loud: “Me in the middle of my work day".#While there is a lot more going on with curly I personally resonated a lot with his struggles with burnout.#Burnout feels like mouthwash to me. That you keep rinsing out your mouth trying to get rid of the rotting smell#but it's just surface level solutions. The real cure requires something far more significant to actually make a difference.#The job 'is hard' and 'everyone struggles'. It's part of the process right? You're tired? Anxious? Depressed? Us too! Chin up!#Actually I resonated with a lot of things within Curly (this is a curly positive space - he's not perfect. He's just human).#One thing being his desire to see the good in people and believe in their potential.#Because here's the thing. Some people truly do just need someone in their corner who stands by them so they can grow and improve.#And some people will take advantage of your kindness. You focus so much on their humanity while you stop being a person to them.#The horrifically toxic relationship persists because Curly tries to see the bigger picture and believes in the good within.#Anyone who has lived through constantly trying to reframe the hurt as something else knows-#-just how many excuses your brain will make to avoid cognitive dissonance. It's human psychology.#Jimmy sucks so bad. But we the audience have the privilege of not having years of baggage associating him in our minds as 'friend'.
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do you ever like wanna make something cool but you dont know how so you just sit around like a moron for 5 hours straight pretending you know how
me neither
on a more serious note i know ad astra as a whole isnt over but i still want to thank daybreaker for their fics. what friends are for was the very first md fic i ever stumbled upon when trying out ao3 for the first time, and prior to joining the server i was checking it near daily for uploads. god knows if i'd be as deep in ao3 as i am now if it werent for this story and convenient timing. Thanks for the story.
#so What Friends Are For is over.#i did nOT CRY. i DO NOT CRY.#the lyrics incorporating the lyrics into the final chapter. daybreaker i HATE YOU#i still get GOOSEBUMPS just THINKING about the lyrics and then you FORCE ME to READ THEM#i thought it would be cool for the lyrics to be from different characters so i just picked kinda at random maybe#would i consider this a long post#gonna say no cause its more grid. be happy i didnt spread them out like i usually do#just pretend all the frames are in a consistent style and also better in every way also#oh i could probably tag daybreaker here but i dont remember their tag#its probably @lady-daybreaker or something but im too deep in this to check now#im not that deep im just lazy#i made uzis beanie look good for ONE PANEL. a SINGLE PANEL#and it was the VERY FIRST ONE#this post sucks im going to sleep#art#murder drones#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones uzi#not tagging the lyrics or nori. figure them out yourself bozos#for that one guy who liked how i made the limbs bend in the last one. sorry i got lazy#is there a picture limit
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/844af26e47064362b5930eedfc2b8638/42772f3127709ee0-81/s540x810/3b56c0425e28ab62b21fdfb2170f7d10e2bc8272.jpg)
#an art#sdr2#super danganronpa 2#danganronpa 2#fuyuhiko kuzuryu#hajime hinata#kuzuhina#Guess who had a ✨REALLY bad nightmare✨ and was shaking & crying for an 💃hour💃#It was so fuckin targeted. I wouldn't even *write* a nightmare so on the nose. C for originality A+ for effectiveness#Been super out of it all day at work & get choked up if I think too hard about it.#This doesn't even look good idc. Give me catharsis you bunch of pixels on canvas
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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banquet (based on the mv for dance dance by lexie liu)
#all the poses are from the mv ! :p#yuri on ice#art#fanart#katsuki yuuri#yuri katsuki#my art#I wanted to make the gifs the exact bpm of the song but I got too lazy to make it exact. So I just guessed and it turned out close enough 🧐#if you sync it right. Which is kinda hard esp getting the 1st and 3rd gifs to sync w each other but it’s ok#+ my laptop was crying for help . I saved so many tests. this was my first time ever making gifs .. had fun
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f9efd43793f2f80e5566b77b31c58eea/1d4e8779d31e8a2a-da/s540x810/54c9886001c3c7d581cc9c6491df8c29ecbc6c1d.jpg)
LET HIM GET UP LET HIM GET UP
#NO! LEAVE THAT MAN ALONE!#sometimes its embarrassing watching this part like bro only got a few punches in#let charles be a badass GOD#i get that he was fighting apocalypse BUT THIS IS LITERALLY CHARLES DOMAIN WHY IS HE GETTING BEAT#apocalypse wiping the floor with him damn#they really giving charles the damsel in distress roles IM CRYING#that man literally has military training please ☹️#my phone updated now my emojis are too big pissing me off#he’s literal the worlds most powerful telepath why is he losing in the astral plane?? 😧#if people weren’t so pissy about telepathy charles wouldn’t have to limit himself so much#anti-telepathy people i am coming for you (and not in the good way)#honestly this was all probably an excuse for jean to be cool but she could’ve done that herself we didn’t need to beat charles to a pulp#charles xavier#professor x#x men#anti xmen apocalypse#xmcu#cherik#wish does not shut up
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Please Reset Your Save File :)
idk what came over me but here take this forgettable au wingdings undertale ARG ass image
speaking of being a mystery image with secrets to be unlocked, i’m gonna refrain from yapping. do the sleuthing yourself I believe in you
ok…. fine….I cant resist…. BUT DO THE TRANSLATING YOURSELF IM NOT DOING EVERYTHING FOR YOU
Ill start by explaining my proccess cause it was quite eventful!
The jumping off a cliff towards something was inspired off of this tiktok :D
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f7cce597c66819d609ddb8ba02a6d24c/87850be225665cb4-47/s540x810/270b52721a7cef40fc14a99e648a9799b27444f1.jpg)
Thought it worked GREAT for a character who was so dead-set on his goal he destroyed himself in the process of achieving it… And thats all I had in mind, Wingdings reaching twords his goal (a star/the player) and the rest I just went along with as I drew
I didn’t intend on the background being black, was just a placeholder, so once I finished the line art I fiddled with the color. thought some sort of “blue screen of death” would go well with the themes of what happens to him since he is IN a game. so the universe literally restarts (resets :3) itself to get rid of a glitch (him)
My theory currently is that his goal was to become some sort of player/gain the ability to reset, and once he did that, the game saw him as an error/glitch, so got rid of that- bro IS Turbo from wreck it ralph
After that whole idea- I was looking at some references to replicate the text and it made me go “OOOHOOO” when I saw the QR code like “oooo I could make my own and have some fun with that…” and so I did- and decided to link my original idea for that!
Reference:
I had fun making some differences in the wording to fit the situation
In the end, 2 silly illustrations that are fun to flicker between!
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ce7aca26f11bac1cc9ff0e797d76ca9d/87850be225665cb4-4b/s540x810/755560e61990c70c6819fd1814692e83e4db6511.jpg)
talking about the actual drawing though:
The cliff Dings is running off of has echo flowers because I SWEAR those are important. trust.
Him not wearing gloves is meant to depict how little he cares for his own safety in his last days. I did the same thing in my IM SANE amv!
The “star” having an eye is meant to show how its both the player, and seeing the stars/surface that Wingdings is reaching for.
The wingdings font covering Dings’ face/eye socket is meant to symbolize that perhaps he feels defined by his inability to communicate like other people naturally can.
“Ths Stars, They Cry Out Your Name” is my favorite thing in this… from Wingdings’ perspective, the only thing that matters, that understands him, that TRULY values him…is THE STARS. its like this goal that he has that will make him feel valued. Getting to the surface = being “worth it” But truly, the stars are the PEOPLE that care about him. Asgore, Alphys, Sans, people that are genuinely concerned over his obviously deteriorating mental health- they CRY out his name, not “call” like I had originally planned.
“66%” hehehehhe funy gaster numbr
ok and last thing- Im gonna cry remembering this dialogue from the official Clock App
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/99f19418dcf165641b7c087fded8a79b/87850be225665cb4-60/s540x810/9261dfae5645b8810308464a290d04c95495a441.jpg)
its so important for this AU, PLEASE
#undertale#forgettable au#undertale au#forgettable au fanart#undertale fanart#wingdings is the bane of my existence#wingdings i hate you#I spent way too much time deciding what I should put on that qr code#thought of making a google slide presentation from wingdings’ perspective#but that wouldve been way too much work#and probably contradict things that will be revealed later…#IT WOULDA BEEN COOL#But I valued the ‘they cry our your name’ too much not to include it SOMEWHERE#sooo#ALSO IM GETTING SO MUCH BETTER AT DRAWING SKELETO ANATOMY???#maybe having an undertale hyperfixation wont have so many lasting consequences on my art after all#give me lots of opportunities to improve my skeletal structure!
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Book Fiyero: *immediately recognizes Elphaba and stations himself at the backdoor to prevent her from evading him, stalks her halfway across town to her aerie (even though at that point in time she was only a college friend he hadn’t seen in five years), insists on seeing her again, instinctively goes to comfort her when she first cries, gets sucked into increasingly deep and fraught conversations with her about collateral damage and freedom fighter terrorism, calls her the “most individual, the most separate, the most real” DURING AN ARGUMENT, says he adores Elphaba’s looks IN THAT SAME ARGUMENT, doesn’t understand Elphaba’s “being born with a talent or an inclination for goodness is the aberration” comment because (implied) he sincerely believes Elphaba isn’t evil, changes his mind about the plight of the Animals all by himself but doesn’t mention it to Elphaba because he is afraid she would distance himself from him, buys scarves for both his wife and Elphaba even though only Elphaba likes scarves, is so concerned for Elphaba and her dangerous Lurlinemas Eve mission that he stalks her instead of staying at his club or just leaving town altogether, and is so worried about her that he returns to the aerie just to see her*
Also Book Fiyero: Am I in love with Elphaba?
#😭😭😭😭😭😭#wicked#wicked meta#wicked book#faeyero#fiyeraba#re reading wicked and i am crying#maybe the musical was right all along in making him the scarecrow#jk fiyero’s wicked smart no pun intended#i think he was protecting himself subconsciously from heartache#because he had sarima and the kids#if he got in too deep with elphie…well…#but sarima believing he was a little in love with glinda makes me laugh so hard. so off base#honestly the intensity with which fiyero just latched onto elphaba when he sees her again. real I'M NOT GOING TO LOSE HER AGAIN vibes#it almost makes me wonder#because it’s been five years dude#crope saw her too#but he didn’t stalk her halfway across town just to say hi#and he knew her for much less time than glinda boq crope AND tibbett. they literally had only (1) line of dialogue during the shiz years#don’t get me wrong#typically when you have to ask yourself if you love that person the answer is usually no#but i think in this case actions speak louder than words#no shade to musical fiyero btw he also got the sauce. especially bailey!fiyero oh god#but book fiyero is something else#‘my wife is from nest hardings’ ELPHABA WAS BORN IN NEST HARDINGS#he could have said ‘my girlfriend or friend or cousin’ but nooo it had to be wife#also the fact that he refused to sleep with sarima’s sisters or be unfaithful to sarima because he didn’t want to compromise his power#but then sleeps with elphaba when she sheds (1) tear#i’ll shut up now
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Bryce felt pretty good. Music drifted through the air from Levi's guitar, and he was grilling his signature BBQ ribs. What more, he was in the company of his favourite people: his beautiful wife, sister, and best mate. "I still can't get used to this, I'm a grandad!" Bryce laughed heartily at the table while the parents engaged in animated chatter about their kids. Soon they were gushing over photos of Renee, Robbie, Kiana and of course the twins. "Honey, two more weeks and we'll meet the twins!" Leilani kissed her husband and smiled from ear to ear. They couldn't wait for the day to come!
Surprise @duusheen and @estah!!! I'm sorry that these guys have not appeared in my posts for a whole freakin year 😱 (esp Bryce and Leilani TERRIBLE IK!!!). I've slowed down my legacy for storytelling and once you move on a gen, the previous ones don't feature as much 🤧 I'm trying to include more sims that are relevant (e.g Uncle Billy 🫡) but unfortunately not everyone is involved. So I am here to say your babies Leilani and Levi are living their best lives in my game!!!
#ts4#sims 4#ts4 gameplay#ts4 legacy#postcard legacy#postcard gen 3#bryce reichmann#bailey reichmann#levi costello by estah#leilani kahananui by duusheen#kiana costello#renee reichmann#robbie reichmann#louis kingsley#harvey kingsley#antony camacho#you can blame school/work demotivation playing tjolc too HAHA!!!#im so happy seeing my sims all happy and everyones getting old 🥺#ive tried to make them look older but my gshade hide their wrinkles well lol bryce has had like 3 adult looks (and 3 YA)#i looooove that last picture 🫶#im crying seeing them all again#and that is kiana and her bf anthony!#shes all grown up!
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☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 2 ]
{☆} characters furina, neuvillette {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings none {☆} word count 1.9k {☆} previous [ 1 ]
This had to be a punishment of some sort – some kind of divine punishment.
She was bored out of her mind just watching the sleeping body – she hadn't blinked once in the past five hours, her eyes were really starting to hurt. Yet they still hadn't moved so much as an inch since she sequestered them away to the only place she had known to be safe.
But it'd been almost a week since then.
The only solace she found was that Teyvat had seemed much less hellbent on collapsing in on itself like a dying star.
That counted for something.
Not much, but something!
..Even if their position was no better then it was a week ago.
There was, after all, still the issue of what to do about the false Creator – the actual imposter – and the Archons following them like blind lambs. The other Archons wouldn't listen if she tried to reason with them, and it would only risk the life of Divine One if she spoke of their location to anyone else.
She also was pretty fond of having her head still attached to her shoulders.
So she avoided them all together. Partially because she wasn't sure she wouldn't have a breakdown at the sight of them..she'd never been a fighter, and fighting an Archon? Easy pass.
Instead she was forced to babysit the sleeping Divine until they woke up while Neuvillette handled taking care of the nation and dealing with the other Archons – and by extension the false Creator.
Really though, she would almost think them dead if not for the subtle rise and fall of their chest.
Though..this also left her with a lot of time to herself. A lot of time to think.
She really didn't like it.
There wasn't a lot to occupy her mind and what little there was only distracted her for a scant few moments before her eyes drifted back to the Divine like she was locked in their orbit, unable to escape.
She closed the same book for the twelfth time – she kept count – and returned it to it's meticulously designed place within her bookcase. A low, barely audible huff of frustration escaped her lips before she could bite it down, her stare boring a hole into the body of the Divine One with a sharp intensity she rarely showed.
She was tired, bored and constantly on edge, fearing that at any moment someone would find out about their presence here.
That, at the drop of a hat, she would be powerless to stop the greatest tragedy of her time play out before her eyes.
Neuvillette would have scolded her for being so petulant, especially around the Divine One, if he were here.
But he wasn't.
He was out running her nation, instead.
And what was she doing? Nothing!
She grit her teeth, nails digging harshly into the palm of her hands as she took a deep breath – now was not the time to think about that. She had..much more pressing matters. Sulking and letting her thoughts spiral helped no one, least of all herself.
Yet her attention was caught by a harsh inhale, the rustle of fabric – were they finally waking up? She was exhausted, but it all vanished at the sudden drop of life within the otherwise deathly still body of the Divine.
Her eyes followed the subtle twitch of their fingers, watching as their brow furrowed and their features twisted in something almost like..pain.
..She wasn't ready.
What was she supposed to say?
Should she even say anything? Would that be considered impolite? Does she wait for them to speak first? Should she kneel? Bow?
She doesn't get much time to find her own answer before their lashes flutter, chest heaving with every strangled breath. Every single thought vanishes from her mind the moment she meets their eyes.
For a long, silent moment she thinks that her heart must have stopped.
Their eyes glow like the cresting of the sun over the horizon, painting the world in hues of gold – yet it also reminded her of the dipping of the moon below the waves, casting the briefest, most gentle of lights upon the world engulfed in darkness. In the depths of their eyes was the birth and death of stars in the infinite cosmos – glittering stars in a sea of empty, blank space that left her feeling lightheaded and breathless.
Beneath the splendor is a spark of recognition in their eyes so vibrant it was like a shooting star piercing through the dark night sky, leaving nothing but the wonder in the eyes of the observer as the only proof it ever existed – brilliant in it's beauty, however brief.
It is the most beautiful thing she has ever seen.
"Focalors?"
The lilt of their voice nearly made her knees buckle beneath her – euphoria so consuming it left her feeling she was starving swallowed her whole, her mind blanking in a moment of utter bliss. It was..an indescribable feeling that she doubted she could ever hope to put into words – not in a way that could properly express it, try as she might.
She swallowed the words that threatened to spill from her lips – she couldn't make a fool of herself. Not in front of them of all people. She'd never forgive herself.
"Divine One," She rasps, clearing her throat and covering her mouth with a hand to mask both her nervousness and the small smile that creeps across her face. She quickly regains her composure, hand resting on her hip as she puffs out her chest with every bit of pride she can manage. "I am sure you must be confused, but worry not– your most loyal acolyte has seen the truth!"
The silence is deafening.
She opens one eye, peaking at the bewildered and almost distraught expression of the Divine.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
That..she was not prepared for. Surely they knew who they were! Surely they knew. They had to– she's been praying to them for as long as she's breathed, she's dedicated every hour of her life to living up to their ideals, they can't just–!
"Lady Furina?"
Neuvillette, thankfully, spares her the embarrassment of having a meltdown in front of the Divine, the gentle rap of his knuckles against the door making her and the Divine pause, the soft lull of his voice soothing her nerves and yet setting her on edge at the same time.
"Neuvillette." She clears her throat again, her steps hurried as she marches to the door and pries it open none too gently, a forced smile pulling at her lips. She wastes no time tugging the man into the room, shutting the door behind him with a short huff. The silence is, somehow, even worse then before as the three of them stare at each other in absolute exasperation.
Neuvillette, for his part, manages to get his act together with a sharp clearing of his throat, bowing so low even she looks unnerved. She steals a brief glance at the Divine, and she's taken aback by the uncomfortability twisting their features into a grimace.
Their expression is schooled back into one of empty apathy when he stands back to his full height, but she saw it – she knows she did! Did they not like their worship? Were they not respectful enough? For a moment, she feared the Divine would smite Neuvillette down on the spot..but they just stared at him like he was a ghost.
"Why aren't you killing me?"
The defeated, resigned tone combined with the way their voice cracks makes her heart ache in her chest – it feels as though her entire world is crumbling down at her feet, and she cannot explain why she feels such emotions so strongly, but it is suffocating. It is almost as if Teyvat itself is weeping, bearing down upon her shoulders like a heavy weight.
She feels the urge to weep herself, but she powers through, gritting her teeth long enough for Neuvillette to take his place at the side of her – though it feels more like their – bed, kneeling like he was going to pray.
"Divine One," He offers a hand with a quiet rumble of his voice, the words slipping off his tongue like honey. It's like trying to soothe a stray cat..though she'd never voice such comparisons of the most Divine out loud. "I..we mean you no harm. I swear on my authority as the Iudex of Fontaine and Chief Justice that you are safe with us."
The skepticism she expected, but the reverence in which Neuvillette must convince them – or perhaps they are simply so tired that they simply did not care any longer if it was all some ploy to drive a knife between their ribs. She didn't expect them to actually place their hand in Neuvillette's.
He didn't either, judging by the way he visibly brightened – not that they'd notice, but she did.
..Not that she could really blame him, her heels clicking against the floorboards as she shifted her weight to the other foot with a nervous energy that was practically bursting at the seams, more then a little jealous of the attention he was receiving. She was the one who found them, she was the one who stayed with them the entire time..but he gets all the attention?
How unfair.
"O-of course! We would never lay a hand on our creator," She adds, her voice a little higher pitched then she would have liked as she placed her hands on her hips, puffing out her chest and brushing off the sting of jealousy. "Least of all I– your most loyal, most devout acolyte!"
She felt baffled when she heard the sound of their laughter, her shoulders hunching and her cheeks flushing on mere instinct – she was expecting mockery, but the look in their eyes, still dulled by a pain she cannot even begin to imagine, made her hesitate.
..It was, perhaps, the most genuine thing she'd heard from them ever since before the hunt began.
She wasn't sure why her heart hurt at such an idea, but it was enthralling to see the beginnings of a half hearted smile on their lips.
For a moment, her mask of theatrics was forgotten as she stared at them in a mixture of awe and adoration– and though she didn't look at Neuvillette, she could imagine he must've shared such an expression.
Had she any doubts that they were her Creator, that they alone were the most Divine..they would wiped clean now. There was no mistaking the way the world itself seemed to grow clearer as they glanced up at her like she was worth something.
For a moment, she realized how cold the false Creators gaze had been now that she has felt warmth so gentle it almost made her knees buckle beneath her. It felt like a pale imitation, now.
Nothing could compare to the warmth that spread through her body at the mere semblance of a smile upon their lips. She didn't even mind if it was her they were laughing at anymore, she just wanted to hear them laugh again.
She'd make a fool of herself, if she had to.
She'd never felt so..ravenous for such a thing, but just the briefest glimpse was addictive.
She simply couldn't help herself from striding across the room and clasping their free hand in her own, her smile wide enough to unnerve as she leaned her weight onto the bed. For a moment, she considered pulling away at the way they startled, but her mind was made up by then – there was no going back.
"Again."
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#fic tag#neuvillette#focalors#furina#dont ask what happened here idk#this was. also supposed 2 be neuvi focused and then i.#dont talk 2 me abt focalors i wont ever shut up#got a 300k word essay on hand abt how i feel abt her character/how i interpret her personality and her story#focalors jsut like me fr fr (cries at the slightest inconvenience or the slightest mean comment)#shes so pathetic girlfail im gonna chew on her#what happens when reader gets stuck with two emotionally repressed french bastards?? hell#neuvi is the “emotionless” flavor of emotionally repressed in that hes HORRIBLE at showing emotions at all#ask him to smile and its incredibly unnerving and theres too many teeth but hes trying his best please call him pretty or he will cry :(#furina is the flavor of emotionally repressed where she makes it up by having Too Many emotions#using theatrics and masks to show everyone what they want to see but inside this girl is a MESS#constant anxiety and panic 24/7#will do random shit and look at you and if u dont compliment her she will think u hate her and cry#compliment her and she'll do even stupider shit to try and impress you more#i love my scrunkly little babies they r so stupid and mentally ill someone get these bitches some THERAPY#i want 2 put them under a microscope#watch this be ooc fr furina when more of her lore drops if shes not girlfail im leaving#anyway see u in a week im going on a trip ill get back 2 u in 6-7 business days
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