#so while this one did end up being a nightmare in the end... it wasnt trauma related (as far as i can tell)

[dirt-str1der]

Ive been trying to get him angry enough to kill me but all he wants to do is call me slurs

[dandelionpath]

man i know I've been getting back into mindfulness and spirituality but that dream I had last night was so painfully on the nose regarding my thinking about how everything may be connected via energy and how we may all be small within everything else LMAO

there was imagery of the earth being folded into the universe and then the "camera" zoomed out and we saw the milky way being folded into itself into a ball shape (similar to earth's shape) and then from there another zoom-out and the same folding into a sphere happened to the universe as a whole and then we were looking at just a void with the universe as a ball (with two cartoonish eyes for some reason), small within the nothingness. at that point things started to lose the plot a bit (as dreams tend to do) but there was some grand presence that sent this little universe ball to school within the void with a bunch of other universes, so I could technically glean meaning from that as well I suppose, but MAINLY the dream was carrying symbolism similar to horton hears a who, which is ... pretty funny, all things considered

[sophswritingthings]

Had an idea where mizu has an injury and ringo has to take mizus clothes off enough to reveal her back (she covers her front side by holding up her clothing or something) but once he sees her back hes shocked because it has scratches all over it (due to reader omg?? Ifykyk) and Ringo and Taigen are both confused because they dont know mizu and reader are dating! They end up asking if she did anything in the brothels and mizu is just smiling in a love sick way at the thought of reader as shes being pushed and bothered by the two boys. Readers tending to the fire while this is happening and snickering to herself?? Love your writing i hope this wasnt too confusing

pairing: mizu x fem!reader

warning(s): implied nsfw

a/n: hi!!! I’m back!!! (I feel so much better, thank you for all your kind words and wishes <3) and I love this idea 😭

summary: ringo and taigen find scratches all up and down mizu’s back.

word count: 310 words / 1,738 characters 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“careful.”

mizu hissed the word, holding her clothes against her chest. she had a deep wound across her shoulder. the only one she trusted other than you to see her like this would be ringo.

if you knew how to stitch, she’d have you do it.

but, she didn’t, so ringo was her next best option.

and of course—taigen was there, but she’d shoved him away. him, seeing her like this? her worst nightmare.

“uhm, master..” ringo whispered, gazing up and down mizu’s back. “you have scratches covering your whole back—did something else happen? how long have you had these? they look new..”

her eyes widened, for only a moment. scratches? what did he mean? oh.

oh. that’s what he meant.

“ah.. just..” she could barley get out a few words before she chuckled. she glanced over her shoulder, seeing you snickering by the fire.

“we’re you up to something in the brothels, mizu?”

taigen’s voice rings in the room, seeing him leaning against the wall.

“well.. I—“ she chuckled again, unable to make a full sentence. “sort of.”

you snickered again, smiling down at your fingertips—where your nails were rather long, able to leave deep scratch marks on anything you so wished.

“well someone must be good at it, then,” taigen scoffed, not wanting to really admit the fact.

“you could say that,” you snorted, covering your mouth with your hand. 

mizu looked at you with wide blue eyes, her cheeks flooding with a red tinged color. you smiled softly at her, giggling as you saw the expression on her face. 

“(y/n)..” she mouthed, gazing at you with slightly slimmed eyes.

you smiled brightly at her, looking away and back at the fire. her eyes narrowed fully. now she’d have to go through a whole thing with taigen and ringo and explain your words.

she’d deal with you later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[freakinator]

funny thing about how i view the conflict in todays stream is that i view flame and wemmbu in very separate ways despite them doing essentially the same thing

in flames case:

i view his betrayal as ultimately a tragedy, their history all thrown aside due to a combination of wounded pride and genuine upset

if yall didnt see his chat for this stream it was actually really, really bad, like his chat is genuinely so fucking annoying oh my god and is a really good demonstration of why i think streamers should be mean to their chatters sometimes to so i actually wasnt at all surprised that he was so upset but i thought hed log off instead of acting out like this

he wanted respect but literally ruined the months long work of one of the few ppl that were willing to trust him over something that couldve been resolved if he just waited until september, but at the same time i can kinda understand why he was being so impulsive considering again his chat is Really bad, but at the end of the day that really shouldnt have been something you took out on one of your few allies like???? bruh even mocked zams storytelling as if he didnt do thee same shit as well 😭

honestly one of the reasons i was sad about his betrayal is cause it kinda sounded to me like he was genuinely about to cry at first??? maybe im just making shit up tho and he def stopped sounding like he was gonna cry after blowing up the spacewaffles tower lol

in wemmbus case:

i feel no pity for this man, he wanted conflict wherever he can get it and he got it! i think hes a lot like zam in that he just wants some attention and most importantly something to do but whatever happens to him next is his own fault lmao, i respect his honesty tho like hey he sucks but he knows what hes about at least lol

the fact that he still kept trying to get a commission from zam (or at least guilttripping him about it for lack of a better word) like bro i know you wanted to do a capitalism morality dilemma arc with zam but read the room my guy 😭

maybe hes at least a little mad that zam kept turning him away despite the fact he accepted a commission from mapicc of all ppl but like. bro. theres a reason zam called him a nightmare customer lmao

that being said you can tell hes not used to going this overboard considering he offered to help repair the tree when zam got upset lmao

idk i just thought his evilness was kinda funny, still hope he gets his shit kicked in spectacularly tho!

its funny, despite being acting like the shitty no reading comprehension version of abyss he gives me the exact same feeling of schadenfreude i did for minute back in s5 and i believe part of it is his mockery of lore and weird complicated dismissal of moral conflict particularly regarding zam

by weird complicated dismissal of moral conflict i mean both he and minute both tried to convince zam to see ''their side'' and ''reason'' but coming at it from an angle that completely misunderstands zam and when zam points it out they dismiss it and act like it means nothing because of their ''objective'' view of reality, spoiler alert! its not objective at all and they refuse to understand things from zams perspective cause they think hes just being unreasonable or something

idk overall i think their motivations for doing things are just kinda... shit lol

like ik theres some pretty obvious parallels that can be made with s5 here but the difference between the og players and flamebu aside from the lack of style and drama is that the og players waited several months before they started acting out the way they did and when they did start acting out tgey always made sure evryone who wanted to get involved Actually got involved rather than doing it while everyone was away plus their opps werent their own allies (except maybe pangi depending on how you look at it)

[romanoffsgal]

Hotcakes and Love.

A/n: i’m back and i would be posting a series soon. I love Nat and this one is soft.

Summary: Mornings and warm hotcakes with Nat.

Warnings: none

Nat x fem!reader fluff

I always hated mornings, i was not a morning person, worse was the fact that i could not fucking sleep at night thanks to the nightmares that didn’t stop chasing me. But she made it different.

I got up and went to the kitchen, i wanted to make something for her, i hoped i didn’t make a noise, she was a fucking spy. Jeez.

I pulled off some ingredients and made up hotcakes, she liked them, i liked them and i wanted her to have something nice, she was the most beautiful human being on earth she deserved nice things.

I made her coffee and went back to bed with all the food.

When i came in, she was confused, even scared, i could see it on her face, her eyes were looking everywhere, and when they laid on me, she softened.

“Hey” she said with a shy smile and all her hair messed up.”where were you?”

“Nat, i was making you breakfast” you smiled, your heart was beating hard, you could not believe she loved you.

“Oh” that’s what she said, she was not used to this, i wasnt either, it made my head spin around i really didn’t knew what i was doing but it felt nice so i just stopped thinking. “i thought you left” she said.

“Why would i? Do you want me to?” i asked shyly.

“No!” she almost shouted “please don’t leave, stay.” she said and made me come over with all the food in hands. She was not looking at me, and i got worried, this was always a challenge.

“Малыш, ты хорошо?” (Baby you okay?) i asked sitting down in her bed. She didn’t wanted to look at me. I watched her and cupped both of her cheeks “what’s wrong Tash?” she looked at you now, eyes full of tears wanting to leave her beautiful green eyes.

“Nothing, i thought you left, i didn’t saw you when i woke up, and i got worried, i thought that i did something wrong, and-“ you shut her up, kissing her lips, while she grabbed your arms, pulling you closer, ending it putting you foreheads together smiling like freaking childs, again.

“Nat, i’m not him, i would never leave you, not unless you want me to.” she looked at me and her tears streamed down her face “i’m here. And i would always be here.” you cleaned up her tears, kissed her cheeks, and said “come on, you have to eat, i made them the way you like them.”

She just smiled, got comfortable and started eating, you watched her, you could watch her your whole life and never get bored, whoever who left her, was a fucking coward, she is everything to you.

“what are you looking at weirdo?” she said smirking, pulling you closer to her, grabbing a piece of hotcake and guiding to your mouth “eat some too.” she said while she watched you eat too.

You cuddle up closer to her, and left kisses along her face, she acted annoyed and huffed, but you knew it was all acting, she loved it. You knew that if you dare to pull yourself out of her tight embrace, she would chase you and haunt you down like some savage animal wanting her food, it was her, and you loved it.

Life could be so easy this way, in her arms, with a normal day, a normal life, not thinking too much about what could happend, or think about missions, traumas, childhood and life, im her arms and eating hotcakes all was forgotten, all was forgiven, because it was you and her, all alone again.

[geralallfandoms]

|JOEL MILLER|

○Just a dream○

warning: TLOU SPOILER but I promise it have a better ending (I'm sure we all dream about this)

His bloody face, his screams of pain mixed with your screams of despair, his eyes closing, his still body on the floor, Ellie's crying, his slow breathing...they were going to be recorded in your mind for your entire life.

María and Tomy were sitting in the living room, trying to process everything that had happened, thinking about how to move forward from now on. Ellie in her room was still trying to fall asleep, but like you, the images did not disappear.

The silence of the house went from being comforting to overwhelming. Many emotions in the air, many tears flooding the floors, many broken minds in the corners.

The silence that from one moment to the next was interrupted by a scream. A cry of pain.

"JOEL! NO!...NO-PLEASE!" Tomy and Maria ran to your room, knowing that sooner or later this was going to happen.

The door slammed open revealing a broken, heartbroken and sad figure. Tomy was the first to approach you, trying to calm the sudden movements, the attempts to free you from hands that were no longer holding you down.

"It's okay...its okay now..." he repeated over and over again while caressing your arms and brushing the hair from your face. But what in reality was an act of consolation, in the nightmare were bloody hands on your face, hands holding your body, hands that prevented you from helping him...helping Joel.

Helping your Joel.

"LET ME GO! N-NO...NOT HIM!N-JOEL NO!" Maria had a hand over her mouth, not believing what she saw. Unable to believe how far humanity had come. How bad a person could be.

In your nightmare you were living that moment over and over again. You continued to watch without being able to do anything as they took Joel's life blow after blow, how he never stopped looking at you, how his hand always tried to reach yours.

You kept watching as Joel slowly died.

"Its okay...we are safe...you have to wake up."

The hand that was caressing your arms suddenly began to caress your face.

Big hands, full of imperfections...

"I'm here...im okay..."

A harsh but comforting voice. A strong but sweet voice with you.

Your eyes opened quickly. Your hands moved quickly to remove the ones that were touching you, to get rid of that feeling that they were his hands.

But it wasn't a premonition.

He was here.

Joel was alive.

"Im okay baby...breath..."

Joel wasnt dead.

Joel had survived the beatings.

Joel had been in a coma for two days, but the moment your scream echoed throughout the house Joel instantly woke up.

"Y-ou are..." you said as you brought your hand closer to his beaten face.

"I will never leave you my sweet girl..." He said as he took your hand and kissed it.

The moment you realized it wasn't a dream or a nightmare, tears began to fall down your cheeks quickly. Sounds echoing throughout the room.

Joel felt his heart break when he saw you so badly and he swore on everything he had, that he would survive whatever it was, as long as he didn't see you cry... to not leave you alone.

His hand grabbed your waist and pulled you close to his chest, hugging you tightly.

Tomy and Maria walked away from the door the moment Joel began to hug you while whispering in your ear that everything was fine, that he was alive and that he wasn't going to leave you.

"I love you baby...im not going anywhere..."

________________________________

HELLOOOOO something short but that occurred to me and I couldn't stop thinking 😭

Hope you like it!😊

If you have any requests I will gladly do so!

[bunniklino]

TPOT 10 REVIEW!!!!

what a gooooood episode, man, there's so much i have to say about it

i'm so happy that sam thornbury has switched tpot back to being more character focused since tpot 7 and not challenge focused, which is part of why i don't like episode 6

now about the episode itself, the challenge was to escape your teammate's nightmare, which is a really good gateway to more character development, and most of them are very well excecuted (except for one which i'll get to later). i'm not gonna talk about all of them, but i will mention the most notable ones

just not's dream was in the style of early BFB, but no one except for JN is around. book however, unlike the rest of the team, is trapped inside a jawbreaker, and no one can hear her from inside it. meanwhile, the rest of JN try to look for where she is, and when they find out she's in the jawbreaker and get her out, price tag tells her more about themself

book's nightmare was being left behind and having no more friends after her conflict with taco occured. even when she was freed from the jawbreaker, she still felt very lonely, having been forgotten, or abandoned, by all her old friends. that is until price tag starts talking to her, which creates a very sweet dynamic between the two that i adore, and when ice cube goes "hmmm :[" while looking at book and price tag at the end opens up the door for some icy-book interaction at some point?? that would be cool

SPEAKING OF THE S!!!! let's talk about them huh?? the S (and clock) are transported to winner's nightmare: past memories of loser, and how loser took what the two did together and ran off to become famous by himself, and winner learns to let go of him with the help of clock, which not only saves the S from elimination, but it also ends the winner-clock conflict

i am so happy they finally ended this arc, it's something that made me interested in the S in the first place, and it's so satisfying to see that it's finally over!! also, i hate loser even more now. at first he was just a gary sue but now he's just a straight up asshole for ruining what he had with winner. i hate loser sm i never actually liked him

every nightmare was great, except for Are You Okay (which was still good but it's my least favorite)

they were in pen's nightmare, and it was that he'd be arrested for not paying his debt of i think 200 vigintillion dollars?? and they had to get him out of that

pen's debt was never something i thought twice about, so i wasnt entirely interested in this one. it was still funny though!! so i don't mind it all that much

this episode was really good!! i love the direction tpot is going in!! there was a lot more i couldnt explain in this review since i wanted to keep it short (like death pact again's plot) so watch the episode for yourself!!!

[uh-niran-really]

AAAA sososo many ideas, im welcoming myself back into your inbox HAHA!

Prince! Niran au x fem reader please! One where reader is his personal maid and he absolutely spoilsss her, jewelry, fancy clothing, etc etc and she falls head over heels for him. Reader one day plans to confess her feelings to the prince, even tho the chances were slim, she dreamed of being together with him. She was supposed to call him to talk to him in private when she finds him in the garden with lady satya(shes a noble from a highly respected family here so shes 100% fit to marry him)

Reader gets incredibly insecure and upset, so she leaves. She rushes to the king to get herself resigned from her job, too upset to face niran Knowing that she won't ever be able to have him.

Little did the reader know Niran was talking to lady satya on how to get his father to approve of marrying his maid! :00 hes yapping to her about how shes the love of his life, wants to marry her, and when satya tells him the chances were slim he takes her hands and looks at her dead in the eyes, completely serious, and tells her that he's willing to drop everything in his life, his wealth, his status, etc etc just to live a normal life with reader 🥹

Satya sighs in defeat knowing she cant stop him so instead she helps him plan on what to say to the king

When niran comes back to his room hes hella excited but everything in his world Falls apart when he sees a different maid in his room. He kindly tells her to leave but snaps rlly badly when she tells him the reader resigned and shes his new maid now.

Maid gets scared and leaves while niran has a panic attack and a full blown break down in his room, trashing everything and crying his eyes out. He eventually goes out tho and proceeds to yell and order at guards to find reader

Meanwhile, more drama :00

Reader is lost in the forest! :00

She went to the forest to calm down, take a walk with nature but ended up being lost and going too deep in the forest to be in contact with anyone. Shes stuck there for days, health slowly deteriorating as she slowly starves and become dehydrated.

Niran is DEPRESSED. constantly lashing out on guards to search faster or send out more men despite his family refusing his wishes(making his breakdown worse)

To the point that satya had to be over there CONSTANTLY bc he needed constant support or he'll probably self destruct😭

He hasnt eaten or slept in days, leading to satya begging him to do something about his health, anything at all, a bite of food, a wink of sleep. ANYTHING.

But he refuses until he finds her.

Idk how to transition but angsty angst 😈

Once reader is found hes practically yelling at the guards to take her to the clinic to get her checked, for the chefs to make her a hearty and healthy meal, for the doctors to get her checked properly, all while he stressed for her health and safety

Poor boy kept passing out by her side multiple times and panicking when he wakes up due to a nightmare or bc he was scared that she woke up and he wasnt there

For the ending of this hospital sequence, 👀continue the angst bc id like to see how u continue this but the actual story- end it off with happy fluffy ending where he convinces his dad to marry her after he explains the real reason why satya and him were in the garden that day TEEHEE THANK U 🤭

Fem Maid Reader x Prince Lifeweaver - Flirting with Prince Pruksamanee

Content: Angst and Sweet Royal Fluff

Word Count: 6,000+ (oops 🫢)

A/N: Oh my I loved writing this one for you dear! Ahhh such a delight. Our darling Niran is so regal! I love him! Let me know if you want a part 2 to this? Maybe them navigating royal life and having their babies (or making them 👀) But ahhh seriously, I loved this! Thank you as always for your beautiful prompts! Can’t get enough of them!

“It’s beautiful my prince!”

You stand in front of the floor length mirror admiring the new necklace the prince had brought for you. It was a gorgeous gold chain with a rose gold lotus flower charm on it.

“It looks lovely on you my lady.” His words sincere, voice as charming as ever, smile soft and regal.

It always surprised you when he honoured you with such a title, especially since you weren’t noble in anyway. You were just his maid.

“What’s the occasion?”

“Must there be one? You work so hard and don’t you deserve a token of my appreciation?”

You smile at him. Although he was royalty he was so humble and gracious about it. You were his maid but he treated you as if you and him were equals. You loved that about him. He brought you beautiful dresses and gorgeous heels, along with the most exquisite jewellery to match. He allowed you to model it all for him, loving the way they made you look. You often couldn’t wear such things outside of his room, but he kept them for you for whenever you wished to be something you weren’t. He could never resist watching you twirl for him.

“I want you to have this on you always. It’s like a good luck charm. I want you to think of me.”

“I already do my prince.”

Typically you didn’t wear his jewelled gifts outside of the room either. Niran feared you would be seen as a thief, a commoner who only sort to steal from the prince, though you did want to steal something, his heart.

“Then aren’t you just the world’s most perfect girl.”

You fell so hard for him it’s a wonder that you could still do your job. He was a massive flirt, but also kind, honest, genuine. Everything a prince should be, but often weren’t. His brother was a brat. You loved him for how he treated others and for how he prided himself on helping the environment. He was perfect, truly. One day you would confess your love for him, fantasising about running away together. Though sadly he was a prince and soon you were about to learn that the hard way.

——🪷——

“Lady Satya! Oh how lovely to see you.”

“Yes, though we do see each other rather often don’t you think?”

Lady Satya Vaswani of Vishkar. The princes closest friend. Also his betrothed lover. Niran was to marry her due to her status. She was of nobility, and a rather high up one. He didn’t have much of a choice in the matter, though he could hardly complain, she was perfect for him in every way. Kind, beautiful, fierce. Niran was fairly certain she was chosen for her ability to reign him in when he got a little wild. Something she always did when they were kids. They looked like the perfect couple. And yet…

“Yes, I suppose you are right. Are you well?”

“Yes, and you Prince Niran?”

The two began to walk around the garden, Lady Satya holding on to his arm. They often loved to walk around the Biolight garden, watching the roses bloom and sneak a peak at the happy couple. These flowers were alive and of the Prince’s own creation, living light. A fascinating invention that saw the Prince propel in popularity. He saved a whole village from starvation one winter. Quite remarkable. The flowers did love the couple, wanting to grow tall whenever they were near, battling one another to sneak a glance at the prince and his lady. Such a perfect couple. And yet….

“Lovely weather we’re having my lady.”

“What’s bothering you my Prince?”

The lady stopped walking, favouring a particular rose that warmed to her right away. It’s delicate petals spreading out to show her its beauty, sharp thorns dulling to show it wasn’t a danger, scent as sweet as a real rose. It was desperate to be plucked.

“Im sorry but, I have something to confess to you.”

Unbeknownst to him you were heading out to the garden. You needed to tell the prince how you felt. He was your reason for happiness. He was so kind, so perfect, so undeniably meant for you. You needed to confess these feelings because you were sure he felt the same way, and if he didn’t, surely he could see your point. You rounded the corner and spotted him with Lady Satya, your heart sank as you heard his next words.

“I’m in love my lady.”

In love. He was in love. With.. her? Of course he was. They had known each other for years at this point. The prince spoke of her often, such sweet words, never a negative thing to say. You watched them, two lovers spending their time among the roses, laughing, giggling, chatting. She was to be his Queen. She was to give him an heir to the throne. They were built to last.

You felt sick to your stomach. You had seen enough of them to know where his heart was. You couldn’t take it anymore, so ran. Away from them. Away from the heart break. Away from him.

“I’m in love with my maid.”

“How typical of you my Prince.”

He grinned at her. She knew him better than anyone, she knew he was serious. He was practically swooning at the thought of you.

“Oh my lady, she’s the one.”

He danced around the roses, being his typical dramatic self, pouring his heart out. Singing love ballads. Lady Satya watched on in amusement at her best friend. She wasn’t thrilled at the idea of marrying him, she didn’t want the pressure of being a Queen, let alone all the duties that came with it. She was quite happy to sit back and let him enjoy this one.

“Oh she’s perfect. You should see the way she looks dressed up in fine dresses, adorned with the most beautiful jewels on her skin. Uhhh I’m in love.”

“In happy for you my Prince, but… are we not to marry? Your father will not like this.”

“You know as well as I do that this is not what we both want my lady.”

“Yes, I do believe I broke your heart with that news years ago.” She giggled.

It was true. At one point in time he was in love with her. Smitten by the idea of making her his. She had plenty of the requirements to be courted by him. She was regal and elegant, had stunning beauty, incredibly smart. But she never felt the same way. If they were to marry it wouldn’t be for romantic love. A thought that broke his heart. They would have children sure, but that would be no fun. He was torn at the thought. But then he met you, his gorgeous little maid. Oh the way he thought of you was enough to make angels cry. Too many times had he stopped himself from kissing your gorgeous lips. Too many times had he stopped himself from confessing his undying love. Too many times had he started at you, wishing he could have you instead.

“But now I have her. She’s the one. Help me convince my father to break off our agreement. I love her Satya.”

He hardly ever used her name without her title, unless it was something of high importance, such as this. He took her hands in his, gazing into her golden irises, pleading with her.

“My Prince..”

“Please.. I’m willing to drop everything for her. My wealth, title, succession, anything. I’d be willing to live a commoners life just to be with her. Do you understand how I feel? She’s the love I need in this life. If he says no.. well I might just run away anyway..”

Lady Satya gasped. What he was saying was weirder than usual, but she understood on some level. Love was often unexpected. She found herself seeing the beauty in a common life. Maybe he did too.

“I beg of you, do not deny me this request.”

“How could I refuse a direct request from you, my Prince.”

——🪷——

You had ran straight to the King, begging for an audience with him, claiming it was of the upmost importance, concerning his son. You were seen rather quickly, for the King feared his son were ill or worse. The Prince did like to get into trouble.

“My King.. I wish to resign.. I can’t work for you any longer.”

The King said nothing, expecting more from you. He wanted an explanation, surely these theatrics weren’t for nought. You drop to your knees to beg for a termination in your contract. You understood what this meant. You would be banished from the castle, forced to live elsewhere. You just couldn’t face Niran anymore.

“I’ve grown too attached.. I fear I cannot effectively work closely to the Prince any longer.. please.. I beg of you my King.”

“What’s changed. You’ve been with him for quite sometime yes? Has he done something to make you uncomfortable?”

“No my King.. the Prince is nothing but kind to me. I am but a lowly maid.. yet he treats me with such generosity..”

“I see. Very well, you shall be replaced. You may go.”

Although your heart broke, it was the right thing to do. You couldn’t work so closely with the man you loved, knowing he was promised to another. It would only get worse when he married lady Satya. You just couldn’t be around him like this anymore.

“Forgive me for the inconvenience.. My King.”

——🪷——

Niran practically ran back to his room, climbing the stone steps in his tower. The sun was set ablaze, much like his heart. He was going to confess his love for you. Lady Satya would seek an audience with the King claiming infidelity in Niran’s feelings. The King would then have no choice but to hear his son out. He would threaten to leave if nothing else worked. You were his lady. He couldn’t wait to see you, almost forgetting just how beautiful you were. He’d ask you to pick a dress, requesting you model it for him, before confessing his love to you. It would feel less pressured that way. It would feel like you were both equal in a way. He got to his door, straightening out his shirt, and tucking his hair neatly behind his ear. With a deep breath he opened the door and stepped inside.

“Y/N my lady I- Who are you?”

“Your new maid your highness.”

New maid. What was this person talking about. He hadn’t requested a new maid. He was so happy with the one he had. You were always so kind to him, not afraid of his status, his power.. You weren’t mindlessly serving him, you were living with him. You accepted his gifts with a smile. A smile he wouldn’t see again.

“Leave. I didn’t request a new maid.”

“Your old maid resigned your highness.”

Those words cut him deeper than any blade ever could. Why would you resign. Did he not treat you well enough? Had you met someone else? Why would you leave without saying goodbye. He tried so hard not to snap, but he just couldn’t control himself. He was in pain.

“I SAID LEAVE!” He picked up a vase of Biolight flowers and threw it at the wall in a fit of rage and heartbreak. “JUST GO!!”

The terrified maid, leaves, narrowly avoiding the pottery shards that smashed off of the wall. Niran couldn’t help but smash up his room. His desk was flipped, his notes flying everywhere. His bed sheets ripped off the bed, tearing in the process, due to the delicately thin silk. He screamed in a mix of anger and sadness. Why did you leave him? He flung his wardrobe open, tearing out the dresses he brought for you, being too critical of each one. Remarking how they weren’t pretty enough, how they looked to common. How the fabric wasn’t fancy enough. Tearing each of them into shreds before laying in the heap of fabric, scream crying for you to come back to him. His world was on fire, much like the sky that burnt so brightly as the sun began to set.

A royal knight came running to his room, hearing the prince in such distress, and seeing a maid running from his room, in tears.

“My Prince! What’s the matter?!” His thick German accent boomed over the sounds he made.

“FIND HER!” Niran screamed at him. He was shaking, practically tearing his hair out over it all. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t think straight. He just needed you. “MY MAID Y/N! FIND HER! PLEASE!! PLEASE SIR WILHELM! BRING HER BACK TO ME!!”

“Yes my Prince.”

——🪷——

You walked through the forest with such childlike wonder. The trees towered above you as the suns rays penetrated down through the leaves, which gently swayed in the breeze. If you weren’t so heartbroken, this would be such a lovely memory. You thought of Niran again. He would be in his element here. His gorgeous cream hair flowing gently in the winds currents. You imagined flower petals getting caught in his hair, only adding to his beauty. Nature was his domain. Maybe that’s why you headed into the forest. A gentle reminder of the man you loved.

“You’d love it here.. wouldn’t you..”

You wondered deeper and deeper still, enchanted by all the wildflowers. Niran would know all their names, he’d recite interesting facts about each one, before getting self conscious, embrrassed by it all. He had such a pretty outlook on life. A life he shared with lady Satya now. Your eyes stung with tears. Every flower. Every tree. Every woodland creature. Everything reminded you of him. It hurt. Maybe leaving wasn’t the best idea.. What if he missed you? What if you confessed? The wind picked up and it started to rain. The gentle droplets mixed with your tears as you looked up to see a blanket of reds and pinks stretch across the sky. It was getting dark, the sun tiring from its hard days work. A gust of wind blows you forward making you lose your balance and stagger into a tree with a light thud.

Whilst the day made the forest look so heavenly, the night made it look like a bad dream. The tall trees towering over you menacingly. The moonlight shattering through the canopy, illuminating the swaying branches. Shadows looking like assassins waiting to pounce on you. You spun around, realisation hitting you straight in the face. You were lost. The dark made it so hard to tell which way you had come from. You had no food. No water. Nothing. You weren’t suppose to wonder this far into the forest. People went missing here. You would be one of them. You let out a scream, desperately hoping someone would hear you. Secretly hoping Niran would hear you, though you knew you were too far and beyond help.

——🪷——

It had been days. Days since the search for you began. Days since he saw you. He had every guard in the damn castle looking for you. His sister called him ridiculous, but he didn’t care. He was a shell of his former self. He tried to join the search too but collapsed from exhaustion. He wouldn’t eat and barely drank, so it was no wonder he collapsed. He was sent to his room to rest which only made him worse. He felt so numb. His body shook from the lack of nutrition. He was in a bad way.

Things got so bad, lady Satya had to stay with him constantly. He didn’t do much besides cry and lash out in anger. At one point he grabbed a dagger and attempted to slash his wrist, just to feel something. She grabbed the blade however, her hand getting sliced in the process. Seeing her so hurt by his actions was enough to calm him for an hour or so, before the drama started up again.

Often he went to his window, staring up at the moon. He wondered if you were looking up at it too, thinking of him. Oh how he missed you. His gorgeous maid. His lovely flower.

“I know you’re somewhere out there.. somewhere far away..”

He got so ill with worry he couldn’t care for himself. His cream hair became matted and tangled. It pained lady Satya to see him this way. In all the years she had known him, he had never let himself fall into such disarray. Even as children, he was always the best dressed and best groomed.

“Let me brush your hair for you...”

“What’s the point.. It will only get messy again my lady..”

“Oh my Prince.. It displeases me to see you this way. She’ll be found. Have hope.”

“What good is hope when I feel this way… but.. if it pleases you to brush my hair.. then do so..”

She took a brush and sat on the bed behind him. His hair was an awful mess of tangles, mats, and knots. Depression wasn’t pretty for anyone. It was raw and emotional. This is the worst she had ever seen him. It’s almost like he had died. This wasn’t the Prince she adored. He was always the loudest one in the room. Always lighting up people’s faces with his warming personality. This man however was cold and lifeless.

“Ouch..” He groaned as the brush caught on a hard tangle.

“Do forgive me.. Niran..”

It was rare she ever called him his given name. Even as children, he was always ‘my Prince’. In this moment she wanted to show him she was more to him than a noble lady. She was his best friend and would support him as such. She was gentle to brush his hair out from then on, not wanting to cause him anymore pain than he was already in.

“Thank you.. Satya..”

“Yes.. It’s going to be okay Niran. Will you please eat today?” She continued to brush his hair, seeing it transform back into its usual texture.

“No.. I won’t eat until she’s found.”

“That could be never..”

“Then I shall perish… along with any hopes of romance that I once had.”

She wanted to scold him, but just couldn’t. He was stubborn but she was persistent too. She drew him a bath herself, knowing he wouldn’t want another maid in here. Not when he was so devastated over you.

“Perhaps a warm bath..”

“No..”

“And if she comes back? You want her to see a Prince that can’t even wash himself. Even commoners wash. Are you worse than a commoner? I’ve never known you to deny a chance to relax in warm water.”

Something stirred within him. On some level she was right. She was well educated of course, but even emotionally she tried her best. He sighed and laid down, body weak from the lack of food and water.

“Please Niran.. if not for yourself then for…”

She couldn’t finish that sentence anymore. It was clear that the Prince wouldn’t function without you. He wouldn’t do anything for her as long as you were missing. All his generosity gone. All the love he held for anyone, gone.

“Hmm..?”

“If not for yourself.. then for me.. if not for me… for her..”

“I said no.. I show you kindness because you are my closest confidant, my dearest friend. Do not make me repeat myself my lady.”

She sighed, opting not the waste the water, deciding she would use it to relax herself. One of them had to remain calm in this situation, and it wouldn’t be him.

——🪷——

The royal trumpets were like a lifeline for him. He shot out of bed, and ran to his window to get a glimpse of who was returning. Sir Wilhelm was hard to miss. He was a large man with a big personality. Once he saw him, he stared so intently looking for you. He held his breath, a little too long however, causing lady Satya to smack him for being so stupid. He kept searching for you. His gorgeous maiden. His lover.

Then he saw you.

“Y/N…”

A royal guard bridal carried you, on horseback, inside the castle walls.

“Y/N!!!” He screamed, bolting out the room and down the stone steps. He passed servants and maids who gasped at the state he was in. He didn’t care. He needed to get to you. It had been almost a week. Too long in his opinion. He just needed you. His flower.

Lady Satya ran after him, as best she could in heels and floor length dress. She lifted up her skirts, and ran as fast as her heels would carry her.The pair looked ridiculous. Some even remarking that they were having a ‘lovers tiff’ or that the Prince had ‘met his match’. It was almost comical.

Finally he made it outside just as the royal guards were dismounting their horses. He must have looked so deranged, screaming and raving about some lowly maid, but he didn’t care. He stumbled down the steps, tripping and almost tumbling down the remaining ones. Lady Satya shrieked at him, cursing him for being so careless, but it would be a miracle if he ever heard her over the sound of his own heartbeat.

“Y/N I MISSED YOU! OH MY LADY YOU HAVE NO IDE-“

He was stunned to silence when he saw your unconscious body. You had lost so much weight, the colour drained from your face. Your lips as dry as a desert. You looked so grubby it was hard to see your pretty face.

“Y/N..?”

“She’s alive my Prince. Barely. We gave her some water but we weren’t sure when the last time she ate or drank was.”

It took everything in him not to scream. Not to rip you away from the guards arms and hold you so close to him. Instead he dropped to his knees eyes closed so tight he started to see colours dance around from the strain. The guards stared unsure what to do. The Prince was usually so calm, so rational.

“Take her to the clinic!” Lady Satya screamed at them. “And for goodness sake get a meal started. Honestly..”

She hurried over to comfort her Prince, knowing how much pain he was in. He silently thanked her for being his voice, something he often did for her. She helped him up, practically dragging him up the steps, her dress ripping as he stood on it, making her sigh in frustration. She kicked off her heels and hauled him up as best she could, being his crutch as they walked to the clinic.

“You have servants for a reason, you are aware?”

——🪷——

He stayed by your side the whole time you were in the clinic. He was the one to clean you up, apologising for seeing you so exposed, when you weren’t even courting. He was the one to hold your hand when doctors came to examine you. He was the one breaking down in tears every night wondering why you left. The poor man had been loosing his mind so much that doctors started to question his own sanity. He didn’t leave, he didn’t tend to his duties, he didn’t give up.

Things got so bad he would pass out regularly before waking up screaming from nightmares about you being gone again. One time he fell out of his chair and woke up on the floor and panicked that he couldn’t see you. He worried you woke up without him knowing and left.

Slowly but surely doctors convinced him to eat, claiming it would help his mental state. He refused at first but was reminded by lady Satya that if he recovered first, he could help you recover later. Food tasted too good. The flavours burning his tongue. He could barely stomach the finer foods, opting for plain porridge and dry bread. It was easier to stomach. His water intake improved slowly and he agreed to have a bath, though it pained him to leave you for mere minuets. He worried you would wake up and he wouldn’t be there. A fear he had developed.

He started to feel like his old self again, doctors remarking how much progress he made just by looking after himself. It hardly mattered to him, he only cared about you. The Prince spent his days reading to you, teaching you about flowers and different types of fauna. It was a comfort for him, one he needed.

“The deer is quite remarkable Y/N.. Have you ever seen one? They are such beautiful creatures. I was lucky enough to touch one once.. such a soft coat.. Oh my lady, if you promise to wake, I promise to take you to see one.”

Surprisingly his father stopped by, wanting to see why his son was so interesting in a common maid. He watched as the Prince held your hand tenderly, sadly smiling at your face. He noticed that his son practically lived in the clinic with you, bringing his books and his silk blanket from his room. The blanket draped so lovingly over you.

“We hardly see you anymore, Prince Niran.”

The Prince nearly jumped out of his skin. He hadn’t realised that his father was there, too busy focusing on you. He scrambled to stand, his left hand crossing over his chest before he bowed to him.

“Father.. I.. hadn’t heard you come in..”

The King eyed you again, recognising you as the maid who resigned. He glanced back to his son, who very much looked like a deer in headlights.

“I just saw lady Satya not to long ago. She’s rather fond of you, and yet you spend all your time with this commoner. Why?”

The Prince sat down beside you again, hand running over his scalp. He couldn’t hide it any longer. He had to tell his father that he wouldn’t marry lady Satya. He had to explain how he loved you.

“Father.. me and lady Satya aren’t in love.. she’s a remarkable woman, truly a visionary...”

“But?”

“She’s a friend. A confidant. I’ll never experience true love with her. You know what that’s like, don’t you father?”

The King did know. He too had to marry a woman he didn’t love. His heart was set on another noble lady, but she had less status then Niran’s mother. It hurt him deeply to think of her now. The King sighed.

“Are you telling me, you the crown prince, heir to the throne, wish to marry a common maid.”

“Yes father.. I’m willing to give it all up. My status, my succession to the throne, my home, my wealth, my family. I love her.”

“She feels the same?”

The Prince laughed softly. He had no idea if you even felt the same way about him. Judging by the fact you kept the golden lotus necklace around your neck, he chanced a guess, praying to the gods that he was correct.

“Yes.”

“Then this must be why she resigned.” The King turned to leave the room. “Come and see me again when she wakes. We shall have a discussion.”

“Thank you father.”

——🪷——

The moment your eyes fluttered open, he was there. He had dozed off, still lovingly holding your hand. You felt dizzy, but compared to the sensation of your stomach eating itself days ago, you couldn’t complain. Prince Niran looked so peaceful asleep next to you. You wondered how long it had been, but judging by half of his things being in the clinic room, you guessed a while.

“My Prince..”

His eyes snapped open to the sound of your voice, meeting yours immediately. Overcome with joy he pounced, wrapping his arms around you like life depended on it, tears streaming.

“Oh my lady.. you scared me.. please never do that to me again. I fear my heart won’t take another round of such torturous pain.”

His words as smooth as ever. His courtship abilities strong. You wondered why you were still in the castle. You had resigned. That’s when Prince Niran explains everything to you. How he had the whole castle looking for you.

“Why did you leave.. Was I not good enough to you? I would like you to be honest. I am a Prince after all, it’s a crime to lie one. I already allow you to commit crimes on my heart.”

“You and lady Satya.. I.. didn’t want to watch as you fell in love, married and had kids. So.. I left..”

He was a bit surprised by your bluntness, but he did tell you to be honest. He was a little confused as to how you got to that conclusion, laughing softly when you mentioned the garden.

“Oh my dear. I was actually confiding in lady Satya to ask that she beg my father for a termination in our betrothal. I have eyes for another.”

“Oh..”

“If it wasn’t clear, my lady, that someone is you.”

You swore your heart stopped. He loved you. He was breaking off his engagement with lady Satya for you. He wanted to be with you. He could tell you were stunned, so he probed a little further.

“I am hoping that, well, you feel the same way I do my lady?”

“I- Yes.. but.. what about lady Satya?”

“She never was interested in me romantically. Hand on heart, she hates the idea of marriage and kids, and responsibility over the stupid things I do.”

He was so dramatic, but he did bring warmth to your cheeks. You let your mind wonder of what life could be like with him. He could look after you, like your parents always wanted for you. You missed them, but now they wouldn’t worry. You didn’t need comfort, luxury or finer things. You just needed Prince Niran.

“So? My lady, may I court you?”

Your lips landed on his. Fireworks exploding in his mind and yours. It was a pleasant Suprise for him. He could hardly complain. His shaky hands cupped your cheeks deepening the kiss, craving more of you. Your hands tangled up in his hair, wanting the same. His tongue felt so good against your own. Like it was made for just you. It was your first kiss and it felt so perfect, so right, so needed.

When you pulled away you caught a glimpse of him panting softly, eyes opening to stare at your lips again. A small smoulder appearing on his face before pulling you close for another kiss, deciding that one was no where near enough. He needed more of you. All of you.

——🪷——

“I promise you my lady, no matter what happens, I won’t let him belittle you.”

“I’m scared my prince..”

He squeezed your hand tighter, smiling at his pretty little maid all dressed up in a beautiful dress. He took pride in replacing all the ones he had destroyed. The new ones were much nicer anyhow. This one was a deep lavender with gold adornments. The bodice had lace flowers stitched into it, forming the most gorgeous sweetheart neckline. The sleeves were a ballooned shape, made of lavender lace with tiny Biolight vines sewn in. The skirt itself covered with gold stitched to form beautiful flowery shapes and vines. It was beautiful on you. Niran had it made especially for you. Lady Satya helped you change and even offered to do your hair, fixing a Biolight rose above your ear. Both of them did what they could, wanting you to look your best for an audience with the King and court.

“Oh don’t fear, you have not one, but two nobles in your corner! Yes, one’s a Prince and your lover.. and the other wants me to shut up… but wait till you see us persuade him!”

“Dramatic as ever my Prince.” Lady Satya rolled her eyes.

“Naturally.”

You weren’t so convinced that the King would say yes. The entire way to the throne room you panicked that he would laugh at you and call you nothing but a commoner. A lowly girl that wasn’t fit to marry a prince. Prince Niran however had a spring in his step. Lady Satya rolling her eyes again as he dramatically flung the throne room doors open, stunning the whole court to silence.

“Father!”

Confidence dripped off him. He was oozing with pride as he presented you to the court. You step forward, your heart pounding. Many people gasped and whispered about how you were just a commoner playing dress up, and how shameful this was for lady Satya, to see her fiancé so blatantly pining for another. You felt so out of place, wanting to run away again, and yet lady Satya took your hand and lead you further into the room.

“You know why I am here father. I wish to marry this woman. I will give up my status, wealth, place in line to the throne. Please father, your blessing.”

“What say you lady Satya? You seem rather calm about this.”

“With all due respect your highness, the Prince just isn’t someone I’m in love with romantically. I am honoured and humbled by you, but no, I do not wish for this life.”

The King stared at you with intense eyes, watching to see if you crumbled under the pressure. Instead you stepped forward and curtsied as best you could, holding the position until he told you otherwise.

“Rise my dear. Prince Niran, is this really what you want?”

“More than anything in the world father.”

“You’re willing to give it all up yes?”

“Right now if needed.”

He took off his crown and placed it neatly on the floor, taking a step back to show he cuts tied with it all. He was very serious about this. He didn’t want to run away in secret. He wanted a blessing.

“Very well. Then you shall have my blessing.”

The Prince turned to you, lifting you up and spinning you around in delight, before lowering you for a warm hug. You were stunned. You came in here prepared to fight for him. It was too easy. You couldn’t believe it. He so desperately wanted to kiss you, but thought it was best saved for a moment of privacy. He took your hand in his and turned to leave.

“Niran.”

“Yes father?”

“Pick up your crown. See that you show her the proper royal way to behave. If she is to be Queen someday then she’ll need the lessons.”

“You mean..?”

“No one said you had to give up your royalty. You’re a smart man, so see she learns fast. She’ll have to impress the court on your wedding day after all.”

Overjoyed, he bows, holding it for at least ten seconds before thanking his father and rising. You had no idea that this would be the outcome. Never in a million years, and yet, you were to be a Princess, and one day Queen of the court.

A fairy tale come true.

——🪷——

“How are you feeling my lady?”

“Scared. Shocked. Surprised. Take your pick.”

“Yes, it is a bit much isn’t it. The pressure will wear off soon. Once we have the wedding and have our first child-“

“Child?!”

Prince Niran grins. He was kidding. Children were important in a royal relationship, but he was happy to wait. Still the thought of having children with him someday wasn’t so bad. He was gorgeous in every way, your children would inherit that, you were sure.

“So my gorgeous little maid, will you marry me then?”

You watch as your gorgeous Prince drops to one knee, holding the most beautiful ring you had ever laid eyes on. The jewel itself was alive with a tiny Biolight lotus, that pulsed with power, enticing you to put it on. His smile was like starlight. He really loved you.

“Oh my sweet Prince. Did you really have to ask? Of course I’ll marry you.”

[gardensnakie]

Do you think when Sunny and Stranger hold each others hands, Sunny doesn't know his own strength and occasionally breaks Stranger's hands, yet Stranger doesn't say anything because he doesn't want to frighten Sunny into letting go?

Hm well dang, i dont think Sunny would be that strong to break anyone's hands, but if he were to have a tight hold i think Stranger wouldnt say anything.

(Im going to ramble about the faraway au for a moment since im imagining this happening after sunny comes to visit faraway and meets stranger)

If the hold did start to hurt too much, Stranger would subtely loosen his own hold to ease the pain and to let Sunny know that it was uncomfortable without saying anything.

Off topic but i like how it shows the contrast between basil and stranger.

Because it seems like Basil would be the one more likely to hold on to Sunny very tightly while Stranger is much more hesitant to hold on at all. Its hard to explain with all this history in the faraway au i have made up in my head.

But in short, after the good ending passed, Stranger was left by himself again and no one was coming back for him. It made him suffer the realization that the person he wanted to protect, to help, had ignored him to the very very end. No last words. Stranger wasnt sure how he would feel if he saw Sunny again in the real world. Stranger wasnt sure If it would even be right because Sunny was under the impression that everything that happened in his head was just a dream. Dreams made up to help him cope. All of it was fabricated and fears develop into nightmares, it was all built from subconsious, no real life was gone.

How could Stranger meet with Sunny again? after being ignored for so long? It wasnt Sunny's fault to think that his dreams didnt have a mind of its own. (Cause thats literally supposed to be impossible but dam) That hurts.

I dont think Stranger would want to hold hands with Sunny anymore, but that validation of worth is hard to pass up after everything. I imagine its a complicated emotion, that drastic feeling of self-worth along with resentment over all that hes been through.

I think the reason Sunny is willing to hold hands with Stranger would be to show some form of apology. Or perhaps a way to make peace.

Sunny might hold on tighter because the idea of making peace with yourself eventually blurs with making peace with someone else. It becomes a gray area since Stranger isn't a part of Sunny's mind anymore and is becoming his own person.

(sry for saying 'in short' and then proceeding to paragraph) Those are some extra thoughts i have about that, feel free to share more thoughts im curious and like reading

:]

[preciadosbass]

10/8/24 [draft from saturday, key & significant photo/s at end]

woke up at 9 and said goodmorning to boris via the camera i have on him when i’m away. unlike me, i actually got dressed quickly [saw shirt, black ripped skinny jeans, the same studded belts as yesterday, knee high converse, and the same band bracelets as yesterday because i forgot to pack more] upon realising i might actually get a chance to look in those charity shops that were closed yesterday. hearing myself after the concert was really weird, my voice was messed upp. after having something to drink i noticed something on my sisters bed and a fucking baby stick insect from home decided to come away with us 😭. we had to put it in a food pot and hope for the best because we obviously weren’t prepared for that.

we got out of the hotel at 10 and went charity shopping [thrifting]. on the way to our last shop we came across a cat cafe so i obviously watched them for a while. there was a guy outside and his mum and she was saying how they go there everyday and know all of the cats names and things. i took a picture of one of them because it was sleeping with its tongue out and i thought it looked silly. afterwards me and the rest of my family went into our last charity shop and i got an american idiot [green day] cd! i’ve actually seen that cd a ton in shops but never got round to getting it for some reason.

i did previously find like 3 cds in a shop that looked really cool, one had deer skulls on the cover but i looked the music up and wasn’t keen on any of them. they all tended to be too relaxed and country-like for me to enjoy them. on the way back to the hotel/carpark we came across this market stand. most of the stuff being sold there was pokémon and anime, so not my kinda thing — but i found a few pins that caught my eye. i looked at the nightmare before christmas/beetlejuice/metal band/shark pins while my sister eyed up some pokémon figures dressed as people from demon slayer. neither of us could decide if we wanted anything so mum and dad got something to eat and we followed so we could procrastinate.

we both ended up wanting to pick something out so we went back to the stall and my sister got a deal of three figures + an extra pin so it worked out perfectly. she let me have the pin and i chose out a shark with legs because it kinda looked like a cat hybrid and i happen to love both animals. we went back to hotel to pick up some food left in a freezer and i took a few leaflets to make a collage when i get home. we set off on our way back at 1:20 and i slept almost the whole drive. i tried my best to stay awake so i could listen to fall out boy’s american beauty/american psycho but i was shattered. we got home at 3 and i fussed boris while watching even more of ‘danger days gerard -- best moments’ in youtube.

while i was outside with boris i noticed that my neighbours were being extra noisy and heard what sounded like people my age so i went for a walk round the back of the woods to decide whether i’d be too scared to see what was going on. afterwards i decided that i want to go so i asked my mum to ask about me joining in although she’d already reassured me my neighbour says i can always join in with whatever’s being hosted there. once my mum had confirmed me going wasnt a problem, i touched up my outfit and straightened my hair [it thankfully worked this time]. i somehow convinced my sister to go after telling her about what i’d seen so i said goodbye to boris and went next doors.

turned out it was some christian camp thing. ive never been religious and if anything, i concider myself a buddhist/pagan/taoist — but i do find other religions interesting and as we all know now, im desperate to meet people my age. we got there while a service was on so i politely mooched around to see what i could do. i got excited when i saw someone my age, or so i thought — she was actually even younger than my sister lmaoo

my sister met someone she used to see regularly at skating lessons, but i didn’t know her as i’ve always used roller blades and none of the tricks there could be done on those types. the atmosphere was kind chaotic, there was a ton of toddlers just wandering around, but it was somewhat exciting to be socialising like this as i haven’t in at least 2 years. there was a bouncy castle, various log cabins, singers, etc. id only ever been in my neighbours garden 3 years ago when he and his family had a bonfire night so i didn’t know my way around. with that, i just sat on the bouncy castle with my sister and waited for somebody to ask where on earth we’d come from.

eventually somebody did and we started talking. he was really fascinated with the way i dress and kept on asking why i wear the clothes i do. a few other kids also asked where i’d gotten my band bracelets from but i think they were just making small talk. the same boy they spoke to me originally just sort of joked about the others around us with me and i had to awkwardly laugh. after being there for over an hour, i decided to go back home and check on boris. my sister went with me and we stayed there for about half an hour. when we got back all of the other kids were playing football and im terrified of being booted with it so i sat on one of the many seats facing the singers.

my neighbour [i think, i honestly don’t remember what he looks like] handed me leaflets to put onto each chair and once my job was done, a service started. like i said earlier, im not anywhere near a christian so i didn’t really know what to do with myself. i just looked around. while doing so i saw a group of adults go round the back where the bouncy castle and things are so i very discreetly followed. i sat around over there for 20-30 minutes until i went back to see boris, this time alone. my sister wanted me to bring snacks back so i packed my pin-covered bag and also took my camera as word had spread that there was going to be a bonfire.

when id gotten back to the kids area i couldn’t find my sister so i searched a few of the log cabins. i ended up finding her in a huge, comfy cabin with a film playing inside. id watched that building be built not long ago, it was weird finding out what was actually inside. the film playing was ‘yes day’ and i really didn’t like it so i just sat on my phone. my mum randomly teleported out of nowhere to give my sister a jumper and then walked off into the abyss. i think she sat with the other parents. i got bored of doing nothing and after some time the film ended so me and my sister went back outside. at this point in time it was almost pitch black so i took my camera out.

that boy noticed and started playing around with it. it was awkward because he kept on grabbing the lens and trying to show me how to use my own camera lmaoo and this was when he made it even more apparent that he had a crush on me. it’s quite hard to explain how you know someone’s into you through writing but it was painfully obvious. and obviously awkward because i had absolutely no idea how old he was and he at least acted very young. i watched the bonfire for a while while he spoke to me and then got told about going into the woods to hear ‘scary stories.’ i thought it’d be like paranormal stories so i obviously came.

all 54+ of us went down into the woods and it was kinda funny because it’s the woods right behind our house and we knew where we were going but everyone kept on getting lost. we couldn’t guide anyone though, because we were decently far back in the queue [i was no30.] we ended up walking to where my mum suspected, the big oak. we all gathered around this large oak tree and then this dude came out of nowhere wearing an old man mask and a fake beard. he started telling this made up story that made absolutely no sense whatsoever. all i remember from it was that he ‘fell in a grave’ and nobody helped him out. at some point ‘i got you [i feel good]’ started playing and then an ad came on and everyone went silent.

after that happened, the ‘old’ guy started speaking about a ‘scary’ scarecrow. then we all waited in painful stillness for something to happen. then this halloween scarecrow was hoisted up from a rope around the tree. and then fell to the ground. it was hilarious because all of this happened in silence and it was obvious that wasn’t supposed to happen. after his story was over, we walked back to the campsite. we arrived back at 11 and i watched the bonfire for a little bit while that boy spoke to me. on the way to the big oak, he was asking about me having snapchat and whatsapp but stopped because my sister was teasing him. so because we were alone, he started asking me again. i didn’t say yes to anything and just said that i might be back tomorrow before everyone leaves.

when we got back home, i noticed archie [our dog] had been dropped back off to our house by my grandad. i tried having a 10 minute nap once getting into my room but i’m pretty sure it didn’t even last 5 minutes before i got called up to ask my parents questions about boris. i cant exactly recall if it was easily or arguable this particular night, but i got downstairs and ready to say goodnight to boris at 2:30. while i was saying goodnight to him, he was sleeping on my collage journal. i love it when he lays on things of mine. i don’t know whether he does it because he knows it’s mine, or because he obviously can’t move it himself, but he dosent like being on things generally so i like to think it’s option one. i went to sleep at 4.

have a good day/night O_o

🗝️ — boris/my cat

[soap143]

Adult

Lee! Jeongin

Ler! Chan

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For the past few days, hell, even weeks Jeongin had a strange feeling inside his stomach and annoying thoughts that wouldnt leave his head.

Tickling was a usual thing between the group. It happened daily more than one time. But somehow, Jeongin just couldnt get used to it. He always thought a bit weirdly of tickling, but after getting closer with the boys, at least for a while, he got used to it. However they were all older now and had much more work to do. It wasnt unsual to witness multiple wreckings in the 24 hours that he would spend with his friends, but he felt like he wasnt getting as much of it. Back when he was much younger, all the members would tickle him quite often, to the point where he thought that he might hate it.

Maybe they do think I hate it?

None the less, that was far from the truth — that was exactly what Jeongin had discovered. He really enjoyed the feeling of sneaky little fingers poking his sides and scratching his neck. The poor boy would always jump and yell for the tickler to stop, never knowing how much he acctually loved it. Whats there not to like? All the attention is on you, youre laughing and making others laugh and in the end — aftercare. Perhaps all the members stopped tickling him because of much he would fight back and plead to stop? It wasnt his fault tho. He was just insanely ticklish.

He watched his band group members poke eachother over and over again, simply dying in the inside. However he knew that he couldnt be too obvious about it. Nobody likes being tickled — thats a fact that he was aware of. Its very weird. So, of course, he would never dare to speak to anyone about this.

It was incredibly hard trying not to angrily stare at Changbin and Hyunjin poking eachother while playing video games. “Youre cheating!” Changbin plaufully yelled as he grabbed a chunk of Hyunjins side and mercilessly squeezed. Hyunjin let out a yelp and grabbed his poor side. “What is wrong with you?! I’m in last place beacause of you!” At this point they werent even playing. Hyunjin was trying to get on top of the dwaeki while the victim was fighting his long fingers off.

All that was happening as the poor maknae watched. He thought of joining in, but decided to sulk for a while until someone noticed.

When he arrived into his room, he had found out that another member was already in it. “Chan hyung, what are you doing here?” No response. “Hyung, why are you here?” Jeongin came a bit closer to the laying boy, only to realize he was sound asleep. “Poor Channie, he must have been tired…” He decided to let the leader rest. He was quite exhausted himself, so he carefully wrigled and cuddled up next to Chan.

As soon as I felt someone slighly squeeze my side, I flinched awake. I had gone into Jeongins room to talk to him, but considering I stayed up until dawn last night, I fell asleep on his bed… It was quite embarassing, but he didnt seem to mind. The maknae had cuddled up next to me and was asleep. Whenever Innie has a nightmare, he tends to squeeze whatever thing was the closest to him, whether it was his pillow, blanket or… His hyung.

He is our only maknae, our little baby, and I seemed to notice him not getting as much attention as he used to. But then I remember what he had said only a couple months ago…

We had just finnished practice, it was 9 pm. All of us were exhausted because of the long day. “Lets go to Mcdonalds!” “No, Burger King!” “Accualy, Ive been craving ramen for quite a while…” Everyone was choosing what to eat, however, I noticed Innie invested in his thoughts, sitting on the floor. “Hey I.N., good practice!” “Sure…” “Whatcha wanna eat? Everyone has agreed on ramen, but what do you think?” “ Ramens fine, but Im not going to eat… I-I did pretty bad today, I think I will stay a bit more to practice that one move.” “ Oh you really dont have to, not all of us quite got that, we will rehearse that again tommorow. We woke up at 6:30 am today, lets get some rest, yeah?” “ No, I really want to master that one move”

At this point mostly everyone had gathered up next to the youngest one in the group. “Innie, lets get food, Im so hungry!” “Who cares about that move, youll get it tommorow” “Even I didnt get it, dont worry, Innie!” Jeongin was fed up. Why did he have to get all this attention when he simply wanted to stay a little more after practice? “I SAID I WANTED TO MASTER JUST THIS ONE MOVE! Please, is it that hard to get?!” Everyone suddenly got quiet. Everybody but Chan left. “That was totally uncalled for, Jeongin! We were just-“ “Looking out for me? Being careful? Wanted the best for me? Jeez! Can I get a break from YOU. You always treat me like a baby! Well guess what, Im an adult now and make my own decisions. I dont want anyone, especially you Chan, constantly babying me and treating me like Im some child who cant make disicions of his own. Now go eat your ramen, Im not even hungry anymore. Im going back to the dorms. See you later.”

After that happened, we gave Jeongin less attention and treated him more like an adult. He had had multiple outbursts like this, but this one made things clear. However, I just think that he was tired and hungry, not necessarily angry. Maybe he just needed to let some emotions out, and needed a decent reason to do so.

Anyway, I think that he liked and still likes the attention, that we obviously dont give him anymore. Which is upsetting and frustrating, seeing our maknae so sad. Even though he said that he hates the attention that we give him, I can see him sulking, especially when we have fun and leave him out. I can tell that the boys aren’t doing it on purpose, theyre just doing what he wanted. But I can tell how much Innie misses being the little baby of the group.

Suddenly, I felt I.N. start moving around and wake up. “Hi Chan Hyung.” “Hello, Innie-ah” “Did I wake you up? I had a nightmare so I suspect I did… Sorry.” “It’s alright, I fell asleep in your bed when I was supposed to talk to you.” “What did you want to talk about, hyung?” I could tell by his voice that he was scared. “ Dont be afraid, its nothing bad.” “Oh. Well, tell me anyway” “Sorry if I offend you, but did you mean it? That you hate our attention and are sick of being babied? Because Ive been observing you and you dont seem any happier than when we treated you like our baby.” “Um… I guess I just feel more like an adult now.” “Do you like that?” I was met with silence. “Answer me Innie, please.” I.N. didnt seem like he was going to answer my question, so I decided to bring out the big guns. I had always known that our baby bread hated being tickled, but a little bit could never hurt. I gave him one last chance before diving in. At first I just pinned him down with both my arms. “Nohohoho, plehehease Channie Hyung!” he giggled in anticipation. “ One last chance, Jeongin~~ Do you acctually like it when we don’t give you attention? Or do you prefer to get babied like a little baby~~. Little baby bread…~~” I knew he couldn’t take any teases considering his red ears, face and neck. “Little I.N. baby bread, foxy baby cutie~” I lowered my face and whispered, pressing my lips against his neck. “Chahahahahnnie hyuAHAHAHA” he laughed harder as I nibbled and blew raspberries on his most vulnerable and ticklish spot. “ Answer my question or move to the next spot?” “Ahahnswer question, answer question! Pleheahase no more…!” “ Alright then, tell me, do you like being treated like the big adult you are?” “…Yes?” “Wrong!.” I yelled into his neck. “NOHOHOHO pleasepleasepleasechanniehyung listen to meee! You don’t have to do this, Im beggingbeggingbegging yoUHUHUUU” I pinned both his arms above his head and swiched to poking and squeezing his armpits. “CHAHAHAN PLEHEAHEHEASE LISTEN TO MEEEE! I HAHAHAHVE SOMETHIHIHING TO TELL TOU!!” “Oh yeah? Perhaps that youre so ticklish that you cant handle it?~” “ SERIUOSLY! SEHEHERIUOSLY PLEAEHEHESE!” I stoped for real this time. “Okay so you caught me. I do acctually like your attention and dont enjoy being treated like an adult as much as I thought I would, there, I said it!” “Please tell me what is true, not some lie you made up because you dont want to be tickled… I wont tickle you anymore, I promise!”

He promised he wouldnt tickle me. But oh, how much I wanted him to keep going… Curse my hyper sensitive body. “No, it is the truth, I have been a little upset lately” “Well, Im glad that you confessed to me. Can I tell the others?” “ Yeah, that would be great. Im too embarassed to tell them myself anyway…” “Alright then. Rest up! I hope I didnt tire you out much… Sorry for tickling you, I know that you hate it…” Now is the perfect time “Acctually, I have something else to tell you…” He fully turned his whole body to me. Goah, I hate him so much. Why has he got to put me in such vulnerable position? “ I… accualy, its nothing…” not today, not when hes got full attention on me like that. “NO! Tell me, pleaseeeee! Dont make me tickle it out of you again~~” That made me extra scared and all my courage was gone. “I-Its accualy about that…” “What? Tickling?” “Yeah…” “Sorry, I promised I wouldnt tickle you anymore. You dont have to tell me aswell, take your time.” Gosh, can he stop saying the word? Hes so sweet its annoying. “No, I-I want to tell you now. And it is about… T-tickling.” He did that thing again, where he turned his whole body and soul to me, it was scary. Seemed like he could hear my heartbeat. “Well, I… acctually dont hate it. I like it a lot. But I cant take it. And s-sometimes youre a bit too rough.” “Oh…” “Sorry, you probably think Im disgusting or something. I promise its nothing dirty or naughty like your probably thi-“ “ No! None of that! Even though I wouldve never guessed that you like it… I dont find it disgusting, at all. Its cute, very cute acctually.” “You think so?” “Of course! Now, prepare yourself because you basically just asked to be tickled.” He definetly knew how much I dreaded that word and was taking advantage of it. “Beg.” “What?” “Beg to be wrecked by your favourite tickle monster.” At this point I was probably as red as a tomato. “P-please t…t-tickle me…” “Good enough” He lowered his head and started nibbling on my lower stomach and I lost it. He was beeing painfully gentle, probably remembering me pointing out his roughness. I grabbed on his hair and desperately pulled. “Ow ow ow ow OW! Innie, youre gonna have to keep your arms further away from me!” He grabbed my arms and pulled them to my sides.” Keep them there. Now, you understand that Im going to have to pusnish you, yeah?” “Buhuhut I cant keep my arms there!” “I dont care, if you dont, Ill be more gentle” I liked it gentle, but not too gentle, and Gosh did Chan know how to get extra gentle. It would be so painful, worse than rough tickles, which says a lot. So, I try to keep my arms in place as he nibbles the sensitive skin on my abdomen.

He was doing pretty good, too good at holding his arms in place, giggling hysterically, but keeping himself pretty still. “CHAHAHAHAHAN HYUHUHUUHNG PLEHEHEHEHAHEHHEAHSE” He begged and grabbed my hair again. Succes. Raspberries always get him. “Oh no! Was I being too rough? I should be more gentle, yeah? Thats ok, Ill be more gentle~” I loved teasing Innie so much, he would always get so red and shy. I knew I was being mean, taking advange of his weaknesa- rought tickles and using againts him, but in a much more flustering way. He hates rough tickle because he cant take much of them, but extremely gentle tickles are much more agonazing — its just constant anticipation and fear. I start off incredibly gently right in the middle of his stomach “Chahahaniehehe pleheheahahse!” I gently drag my finger around his navel, never bothering to acctually dip it in. I know how much he hates(loves) it. I slowly drag my finger along his side and onto his ribs “ChahaAHAnieEHEhe hyUHUHuhung” He giggles more agressively as I gently poke my finger deeper into his flesh every few seconds. I know how much hes waiting for me to just wreck him. Ive been saving up his energy for the grand finale. “Ready I.N?” “YEHEHES please!” I poke him a couple more times before finnaly diving in. “OHOHOHO MAHAHA GOHOHOD CHAHAHAANA AHAHHAHSNSBA” I start by squeezing his sides rapidly. I switch spots quickly purely for his enjoyment. “CHAHAHAHAN!!” “ Yes, Innie baby bread?~” I ask as I count his ribs, while he desperately tries to stop his arms from disturbing me “GEHEHEHET MY LEHEHEGSS HAHAHA” I can tell that he cant take it for much longer, thats why wants me to switch spots quickly. His thighs are incredibly sensitive, so I start of with them, mercilessly squeezing the firm mucle behind his leg and the front of it, switching quickly so that he can expierience as much joy as quickly as he can. “AHAHAHAHAHAHA KNEHEHEHHES PLEAAAHSHEJDJJEJHA” I quickly listen to his command and rapidly attack his kneecaps, squeezing the top and back at the same time. “STOPSTOPSTOP ENOUGHAHAHAHAHAH” I inmeadiately stop and gently, but not gently enought to torture him rub his whole body. His cute dimply smile plastered on his face that I missed so much. “Anytime you want to repeat this, just tell me the keyword “tickle”, if youre capable of that~~” He was still laying there, panting, but I could see his cheeks reddening up at my words. “I will make sure to…” He whispers shyly. I figured that he may need a moment to think about what happened, so I quietly exited the room.

This was the most flustering yet enjoyable expierience ever. However if he dares to tell anyone about this…

Maybe it wouldnt be so bad, considering all the gang tickles I would get.

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This is my first tickle fic ever. I know the build up is very long, sorry. 🙂

[actualbird]

Wait wait wait I forgot why do you hate the dragon/Rosa card? Is it the plot itself or the ending? 👀

irt my luke card story tier list and me putting SSR Looming Nightmare all the way at the bottom labelled with....

okay, so i actually made a post a long time ago about why i hate this card but after rummaging through my archive, i cANT FIND IT so im gonna have to explain all over again. heads up, this is gonna be a longwinded post, so please bear with me...

OBLIGATORY DISCLAIMER THAT THESE ARE JUST MY OWN THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS, YOU ARE ALLOWED TO LIKE THIS CARD IF U WANT TO OK. DONT COME AFTER ME.

whenever i read any luke card story and judge its merit, i ask myself a couple of questions:

is it paced well?

does it say something interesting or new about luke, rosa, and/or their relationship together?

if there is angst, does that angst mean something substantial?

were there things in the card that couldve been done better?

overall, did i enjoy reading the card?

now let me go through each question one by one

is it paced well? HELL NAW. the entire first few acts go by so slowly with lots of infodumping exposition. even if there wasnt any infodumping exposition, the first parts of the card are boring. luke is essentially alone trekking up to where the dragon is, and by virtue of being alone, we only get to see his internal monolog with nobody for it to bounce off of. the entire first few parts of this card made me go "are we theeeeeere yeeeeeet????"

does it say something interesting or new about luke, rosa, and/or their relationship together? not.....really. it showed luke's devotion and guilt, yes, but we already knew he had that. i'll give this card some credit because it did show luke's devotion and guilt to Extreme Levels, giving us a glimpse of a "bad ending", so to speak, showing us how luke could end up if he destroyed himself. but like....given that these thing happen in what the card later reveals to be a dream, it feels like everything new that the story brought up amounts to nothing

speaking of it being All Just A Dream, let's head to our next question: if there is angst, does that angst mean something substantial? well, since it all just happened in mc's dreamscape, it essentially made the pain feel like it amounted to nothing. it wasnt real, after all. this couldve been handled in a way that couldve made the dream's pain more important, which leads me to the next question

were there things in the card that couldve been done better? YES. in the card, after mc wakes up from the dream, she remarks that it was strange and out of character and then luke comforts her and then like. thats it. i wouldve wanted to see the story instead delving into this more: like them discussing the implications of how mc's imagination thought it was in character for luke to KILL HIMSELF if he thought himself guilty for hurting and killing mc, how her imagination thought his guilt and devotion would reach that extreme. if they had talked about the dream together, if luke's comfort had more context, then this wouldve solved the problem of "does this card say something interesting about their relationship?" because this would be an avenue for something like that to bloom

lastly, did i enjoy the card.....i will admit, the card made me cry, so it's emotional impact isnt non-existent. but after i cried i was like. huh. most of that story was boring, none of it mattered in the first place, and it add anything new to their overarching relationship.

this is why i hate it

it couldve been better. i couldve ranked it higher as maybe in the "good but nothing special" tier, but like. the fact that it squandered its potential to be more, while also mostly just being angst for angst's sake.....well, thats why i hate it kjBLSJFKDJ

again, all just my opinions tho

[goldentlme]

OK SO LIKE . that definitely wasnt a dream and we all agree on that right . right .

i absolutely think that that is exactly what the feds want us to think . the birdhouse was a dream . the book ( " a crow's dream " . it feels purposeful , they WANT us to use that as proof ) , the armor and the weapons and the journey and chayannes floatie still in the heart of the maze while also somehow being in the birdhouse . the cage was never real . OR WAS IT . walk with me .

we start from mexican independence day in eggs garden bedroom . phil goes to sleep and then wakes up with the lore screen to go off on his fucked up unreality adventure . when he comes BACK today , he starts in lore mode and only leaves it when the next fed cutscene forces him to and subsequently - he seems entirely unaffected by the events beforehand until he goes searching for the birdhouse again with tubbo later on . its not there and theres no real proof it ever was , so that means it wasnt right ? WRONG .

we already know that the feds can fuck with the island physically . back at the start of the server when both sides of the wall were populated with abandoned buildings that slowly disappeared as time went on , all of the event builds that showed up seemingly out of nowhere , the presidential office , you get me right . the feds can change the island however they want and they do exactly that with the birdhouse , deleting the chest and replacing the trapdoor to his sub-basement , and even changing the contents of the book .

not to mention the fact that they can Edit your fuckin inventory !!!! tubbos stream from the other day literally proves that when cucurucho was tailing him for like a solid hour and spent even longer yoinking a book from his inventory and changing the text inside . the feds gave phil all his shit back and teleported him right back to where he found that damn crows dream book . speaking of . when he woke up He wasnt in the chair . i know he said he mustve sleepwalked but we dont believe that right ? if everything from him waking back up after " ending stream " to waking up today wasnt real then how did he even get down there ? easy . The trapdoor was broken . are you still walking .

heres how it goes ok . they lure phil to the middle of fucking nowhere . they lock him up with his missing ( and potentually dead ) kids clothes and leave him there for a week . a cage for a cage . a lesson . phils been a functionally neutral party up till the lavacast ( i know he isnt actually neutral . my point is that he hadnt gone against the fed in any serious way up until the eggs went missing ) and the MOMENT he puts himself out there as a threat to the fed and their goals , they put a target on him . that supposed Dream sequence is them shooting him in the head and then slapping a bandaid on the bleeding wound by setting it up as if it were a dream . but they KNOW hes smart enough to question that and thats EXACTLY what they want .

they want him compliant and scared !!!! they WANT him to question if it was real or not - if he goes against the federation again , will he go back to that birdhouse ? and even if it WAS a dream , will he wake back up in there when he goes to bed tonight ? does that mean that the dream itself was created by the federation ? or was it really just a nightmare fueled by grief and paranoia ? cucurocho is the one who trapped him and the one who set him free after all .

i dont really think that taking phil at his word is the move here because theres a big chance of him being an unreliable narrator . the situation is easy enough to write off as a dream but suspicious enough to question . i mean . how would a crows dream still be in that chest otherwise ? we saw on bads stream yesterday when he broke into phils basement that everything was just as it was before , and that a crows dream was IN that chest before phil got back . it was a SETUP !!!! IT WAS A SETUP AND PHIL FELL FOR IT !!! ( JUST LIKE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO )

maybe it was drugs or maybe it was hallucinations from prolonged isolation . maybe it was the feds beaming a fuckin cutscene into his head WHATEVER . the birdhouse was real , phils entrapment was real and he is inhaling some EXTREME copium right now . get therapy dickhead . not at roiers place though hell probably just tell you to have more gay sex or something ( itd help but not as much as you might think )

tldr i think the feds are doing some cocomelon shit to phil and hes fallen for it completely

[ludinusdaleth]

hey, i'm new to cr fandom and wasn't there when c2 was airing, may i ask out of curiosity what was the fandom's problem with its ending?

i want to start by saying this post is meant as a personal memory and not an incitement of any discourse. i do not want a lot of asks or replies or anything about this if i can help it. i would also politely ask that no one reblog this as i really just. dont want attention about this when ive discussed it to death on twitter. i also apologize for not having screenshots but i truly cannot bring myself to wade through that again. it was bad enough i still have nightmares about it.

basically, about 3 eps before c2's end, matt clarified on twitter the campaign was coming to a close, and that. did not go well. you see, folk (myself included, though i wasnt part of the following clown show) were very sure c2 would continue a while. it felt unfinished as the empire/trent had to be taken down, and for some of us ludinus was clearly the big bad, etc. so this was incredibly jarring to a lot of folk. and with that came anger. a lot of critique came down to fear of things being rushed, a lack of closure, claims of extreme neoliberialism due to not taking down the empire (i could write an essay on and cite multiple leftist activists who have stated c2 is truthful to the activist tale, not neoliberalism, and also how c3 deconstructs beau & caleb's actions, but everyone is allowed to have their own opinion on it), and that if shadowgast did not fuck in this short timespan the fans were going to kill liam & matt. and threats of killing were the least of what ensued. im just gonna put a tw here for discussion of extreme harrassment and even threat of necrophilia/rape:

people were. atrocious. beyond atrocious. know why 4sd/a lot of q&a events of theirs for a while had no fan questions? partially bc fans were frankly terrible at asking non-ship questions on talks machina, but mainly because folk FILLED their inboxes with insults (and a twitter account was made of screenshots bragging about it) that only the crew would get to filter out, not the cast. know why dani was terrified to show her face on 4sd for a bit? c2 fans would not let up on how it was her cishet fault fjorjester happened. people thought the solution to alleged neoliberalism was to therefore @ travis saying they would defile his veteran fathers corpse. if there was any solid discussion critiquing c2 happening, it was so drowned that actors who had nothing to do with the show told cr fans to stay away if that was how they treated their favorite creators wanting a break. it really didnt help that a certain disgraced talks machina host was firing potshots on twitter when the cast seemed to be just trying to take it all in, so more discourse was kicked up from him. in general besides all of that, you had the average death & even a few rape threats you would expect from the pits of fan entitlement. the way they were hardly the most notable of the insults hurled their way still rattles the mind. and thats just what i saw. my friends have claimed to have seen worse, but if we can help it we dont discuss it in detail, it's that bad. like i said, any idea of an actual conversation about c2 and how someone felt about it from an analysis perspective was not even a drop in the bucket; there was no actual discourse but rather spitting hatred pouring over that mistook personal grievances for excuses to mistreat quite literally anyone around them who didnt agree that threatening to defile someone was funny bittersweet revenge.

the thing is, after the c2 finale happened? i mean, a lot of folk didnt originally like it (i think it's generally pretty well liked now, and i enjoy it), but it wrapped up a lot of issues pretty well. all that terror & terrorizing over a fictional story was really for nothing. and even if it had ended undebateably badly did anything warrant that fallout?

there are of course a few other factors that seperate cast from fandom now. laura also got innumerable threats from tlou fans for playing some antagonist character, twitter is a dysfunctional shithole, and it's just rational the more popular you get to not be buddy-buddy with fans. but that was. a Time, for sure. c3 is a decent campaign but im far from the first person to note that many of its traits are set in trying to find vox machina's fixed story beats so no story beat is left "unturned" and being as un-m9-like as possible, even when they love the m9. a lot of the worst m9 fans now who harrass other campaign enjoyers and lament c2 being "an unloved middle child" are folk who never left the bitterness they held in that time. for as much discourse as c3 has kicked up i really dont think any of it compares to the sheer scale of what happened late may 2021, and im hoping with all my heart it never does reach that level ever again (i think c3 has a slightly smaller (at least online) fanbase compared to c2, and isnt marked by a pandemic hiatus, so hopefully that means something).

i hope i answered your question. i really hate remembering this time but sometimes i think it should be remembered so folk know what the cost of extreme parasociality is. the distance the cast has from fans now is not only earned but maybe should have always been there, so things never evolved to that extremity. but now it's done and gone. i envy people who watch cr on their own merits and didn't get sucked into twitter at the time; it has been fascinating watching folk say they love the travelercon/aeor arcs and the ending. rewatching later c2 really emphasizes how many complaints hinged on extremely online & parasocial headspaces - you definitely wont hear anyone nowadays say liam is a biphobic cishet abusing matt by not making caleb kiss essek yet. i hope new fans have a better time than we did. oh - and get off twitter.

[pippafitzamobisleftblueconverse]

MY AGGGTM HCS (mostly pipravi)!

-Pips fav colour is dark red

-Ravis fav colour is navy blue

-Pip has always been burnout.

-Pip has the best comebacks possible

-Ravis parents ADORE pip

-I mean they legit have her phone number added, and always talk to her

-pip loves Ravi’s parents

-pip always exaggerates

-Connor would blast Ybwm when he had a crush on pip

-Cara would kiss pip on the cheek

-pips an omnivert

-Ravi also is

-Cara and Connor are extroverts

-Ravi has a really calming singing voice, so every time pip has a nightmare, Ravi would sing to her to help her fall asleep (this hc is inspired by @incorrect-pipravi ‘s hc!)

-the only way pip was able to fall asleep after what happened with Stanley was if Ravi was with her

-they get married when pip is 21 and ravi is 24

-they have their first child (a boy) 2 years later

-THEY NAME HIM SAL

-mini sal ends up inheriting his uncles dog allergy so they cant get a dog

-they have a daughter named aria 2.5 years later

-random af but i hc that aria was a premie baby

-sal is identical to his dad while aria is identical to her mom

-they are RICH RICH

-their older son Sal is born on November 6, and their younger daughter aria is born in June 28.

-aria is a mamas girl, like she’s attached to pip by the hip

-she Also loves her dad tho

-she’s a picky eater

-Ravi loves to be physically close to pip

-their first time was in a car (don’t ask)

-Ravi cried when he saw baby Sal for the first time bcs he reminded him so much of his older brother.

-they aren’t big fans of PDA but they would occasionally give each other a peck on the lips

-their first kiss was after Ravi spun her around after they confirmed sals innocence

-like I imagine him putting her down and kissing her at the same time, and just as he’s about to pull back from embarrassment she starts kissing him back

-when she overdosed, Ravi refused to leave her side

-Ravi wasnt there when pip woke up, but when he got the call from her mum, he balled his eyes out from relief

-when he saw her after she woke up, he hugged her so tightly, told her to never risk her life like that again, and then kissed her forehead, and then lips😜

-though Ravi is sweet, he LOVES teasing pip when their having yk (again, don’t.ask.)

-he often flirts with pip discretely when their around others to tease her

-they make out often (don’t.ask)

-Ravi has a lot of pics of pip sleeping and vice versa

-they have a shit ton of 0.5s of each other

-Ravi loves baking/cooking for pip

-Ravi hates it when pip has a panic attack, every time she does it feels like his heart is being stepped on because her panic attacks can be so severe.

-the first time she had a panic attack with him he did cry a bit bcs it sounded like she was in so much pain and he genuinely had no idea how to comfort her, or make it go away.

-after what happened with Stanley, pip had ideas of self deletion.

-she told Ravi this at one point and he held her while she cried for abt an hour

-pip has a shitty immune system so she’s always sick

-Ravi is the exact opposite, he never gets sick

-whenever pip is sick, Ravi would always take care of her (ie:spoon feeding her when she’s too weak to do so herself)

-once tho she had a fever so high ravi had to take her to hospital

-he obvs cried bcs of how worried he was

-ravi has a big daddy dick❤️😜 (joke obviously)

-pip has a key to Ravi’s house and vice versa

[hostilemuppet]

aight last thought before i go to bed. i legitimately think john dory wasn't always an abuser. clay says "it used to be fun", so you have to wonder how/when it began. when did he start pushing a Hollywood -type diet on bruce??? what the hell was he thinking when he signed off on the photoshoot for clay's funderdrawers?? what was it like, the first time he dismissed floyd's concerns as him just being 'sensitive'? and just how did they all react when jd decided to include branch, a literal baby in diapers, in the band?? honestly we could all spend hours discussing john dory's descent from "kinda bossy older brother" to "guy who pushes perfection on us at the cost of our physical/mental health"

thats something i think about tooooooo! like, we know the band started BEFORE branch was born, but how long before? i generally think brozone lasted around 3-4 years, and when branch was born jd had already set into nightmare manager mode so branch never knew a jd that was "normal".

for bruce it was a gradual shift. jd suggested "spruce" get some more exercise, and he thought, yeah, he could probably use it. to start, spruce just had to go for a run in the morning, and it was fine even if he was still a teenage boy who hated waking up early. then jd drafted a regime, which wasnt that extreme, but then more kept getting added, and the 6 sets of 20 pushups became 10 sets of 40, then 20 sets of 100, and suddenly jd suggested lowering his sugar intake, but spruce LOVED his milkshakes! so jd started giving him fruit smoothies, which spruce also liked, but then got switched for protein shakes, and then the protein shakes became a reward, and otherwise he was expected to be grateful for his steak (rare), potatoes and raw eggs. and he was not.

with clay it was a lot quicker. hed always been the funny one, even before they started the band. he was a prankster, and he always had a joke, even if it was at his own expense, but he was okay with it because it was HIS choice! but then jd decided it wasnt his choice anymore. now clay felt like people were laughing at him, not with him, and he felt humiliated, which was even worse when jd pushed him to show off how zany and silly he was for the actions jd forced him into, in clothes (or the lack of) he did not want to wear, and he just wanted someone to listen to him when he said it wasnt okay. but jd didnt take him seriously. no one took him seriously. he was the fun one! hes a prankster, he always has a joke, usually at his own expense, soft scripted by jd.

floyd... floyd had to sit and watch his family fall apart. he didnt have to face the brunt of jds meddling, he was pretty much perfect for the role anyway. but he saw the way jd was driving a rift between them, and while spruce and clay leaned on each other, floyd didnt have anyone. until branch came along, and floyd was no longer the baby brother! and he loved him, and wanted to make sure jd didnt hurt branch the way he did the others, but in the process he ended up hurting branch himself, and losing the only brother he had left