#so the only damage this has for others is having to maybe see it

[wlwsoccerfics]

Long Distance(LiaWältixBühlReader)

Warning: mentions of Type 1 Diabetes, injury

Being apart from your girlfriend sucked. She played for Arsenal while you played for Bayern Munich(Just like your older sister Klara). So you didn't see eachother much. But you still made it work because breaking up was not an option. Your love was way too strong for that.

The two of you met almost two years ago when you and some other players were invited to a Panel about women in sports. You two locked eyes and couldn't stop glancing and smiling at eachother the entire weekend so before you and her had to fly back from Paris where the Panel was you asked her out and you two had your first date in the City of love.

Today you would be playing against Arsenal in Munich for the Champions League . You had the Chance to finish first in the group stages. Which you hated but also enjoyed. One of you for sure would be disappointed cause neither one of you wanted to lose. But you also were excited cause Lia was staying with you. She was actually still asleep in your arms and would go back home with you after the game until she would have to leave again tomorrow. When she landed last night the two of you cuddled and talked alot, unfortunately that was cut short when your blood sugar started to act up. Then it did hit you like a brick. You were so excited for Lia to arrive that you forgot to eat. Bad move for someone with Diabetes. You were diagnosed with type 1 at the age of 10. Anyways Lia was right by your side while you fixed this mess with some juice boxes.

When she woke up the two of you took a quick shower that didn't end up being so quick cause the two of you haven't seen eachother in a while and you both had needs. So the whole shower took like 40 minutes. Those were well spent in your opinion.

You were fully dressed by 10am and the two of you had a small breakfast. You sat in her lap. "I hate that you have to leave again tomorrow. I don't want you to Go." You whisper out. She smiled sadly. Holding you close while eating her breakfast. "My love i don't want to leave you again either. But guess we have no choice!" She answered. You hide your face in her shoulder for a moment and she stroked your hair gently. "My contract ends after this season..." You told her. "Arsenal has interest in me!" You added on. Lias eyes lit up. "That would be wonderful! So only a few months to go until we could be together 24/7." She was really excited about it. So were you. "Exactly. Maybe it's time to go look for a bigger place?" You suggested. "When i move there... A place to start a family!" When she heard you say that she grinned from ear to ear. Because you two had talked about wanting kids quite early in the relationship. You talked about your future together for a little longer until you had to drop her off at the Hotel the Arsenal Team was staying. You looked forward to seeing her again on the pitch & afterwards.

You also realized that you were late to the Last Team Meeting before the game. So you made sure to drive a bit after then you were allowed to but still careful enough not to cause any damage. After parking your car you made a run for it. Racing inside with your bag. First talking with the Coaching staff to let them know you won't be extending your contract and will be moving next season to Play for Arsenal. They tried to Change your mind but in the end they accepted it. You went to the locker rooms where the Team was talking with one another ."Look who managed to join us, it's Baby Bühl!" Sydney said teasingly. "Very funny Sydney. Sorry for being late. I had an important talk...with Alex and the rest. Klara can we talk in private for a moment?" You looked at your sister. Klara looked quite concerned and so did the rest cause things sounded serious. "Yes sure." Your sister replied and walked out of the locker room with you.

You stood a few feet away from the locker room entrance with Klara. Your older sister looked at you, biting down on her bottom lip. "You are leaving by the end of the season, right?" She asked. You nodded her head softly. "Yes. I will move to play for Arsenal and to be with Lia. Long Distance is so hard and we want to start a family in the next two years. So this Is what's best for me!" You told her. "It was only a matter of time but i still gonna miss you, even though i already had a feeling that this was the case!" She admitted. "I will make sure to visit you as much as i can!" You promsied Klara. "As long as you are Happy, i am happy for you!" She let you know, pulling you in for a hug. You hugged her back. "I love you sis." You whispered out. "Love you too, y/n." You stood there like that for a few minutes before returning to the others.

Back in the locker room all eyes were on you. So you told them you wanted to make an announcement. "I am leaving by the end for the season. To be closer with Wally. And play for Arsenal! Don't worry i am still giving it my all later today and we kick their butts together! But please don't break my girlfriend, thank you!" You told them. They all were a little sad & upset at first cause they would miss you but they also were quite happy for you.

The Game was gonna be at 6:30pm. Currently it was 2pm. So you still had time to mentally prepare for the game. Some of you played games together and some did a little workout.

Around 4pm you all ate something light so you wouldn't feel too full during the game. You started to feel a bit unwell. But nothing too bad.

When you went outside to warm up on the field before the game you partnered up with Klara. It was now 5:30pm. One hour until the game started. Every now and then you would glance over to Lia, smiling at her. You also quickly went to hug Leah who became quite a close friend of yours as well.

The first half went amazing. You scored a goal and by half time you were leading with one point. A surprise you managed that cause you started to feel even worse. When your sister and some of your teammates asked If you are okay cause you didn't look like you were you told them everything was okay. It was time to go back out for the second half of the game. You all were in the Tunnels with the Arsenal girls when all of sudden you started swaying back and forth, realizing that maybe the sweating wasn't just from the Game . Leah who was looking at you was alarmed right away and quickly catched you when you fainted. "Y/n!" Klara yelled out when she saw what happened. "Someone get Wally! She is still in the locker room!" Leah answered. Trying to stay calm. Everyone was worried about you. Leah carried you to the medic room, Klara following her. You were checked over and turned Out your blood sugar was pretty low. The reason was because your sensor didn't work anymore cause it almost fell out. Which you didn't notice. And cause you didn't get anything send to your Phone that would suggest you had any blood sugar issues. Thankfully it was able to be fixed with some juice boxes. Leah left as soon as Wally was by your side. She didn't care that she missed the rest of the game. Klara also refused to leave your side. So she was also subbed out just like you were. "You scared the crap out of me, Darling!" Lia replied. "Yeah agreed! Even though i should be used to it by now. It's still scary to witness every time it gets this bad." Klara mentioned. "I am sorry for scaring you both!" You let them know. "I hope you are ready for that happening alot! This one doesn't take good care of herself sometimes." Klara informed your girlfriend. "I promise i will make sure she takes better care of herself and i will do that as well!" Lia answered. "I always knew why i liked you for my sister!" Your sister replied with a soft chuckle.

After the game was done, which you won 2-1 by the way, your Team went to check on you you already could sit up without feeling dizzy. Some Arsenal girls also came to check on you. Leah & Beth for example. Leah playfully punched your shoulder. "Don't scare me like that again, y/n!" She told you. "I am very sorry! Didn't mean to scare you! Thank you for catching me!" You let her know. Having heard from Klara that Leah was the one catching you cause your memories were quite a bit foggy. "Always!" Leah replied with a soft smile.

All of you went out to grab a bite to eat and have some drinks before your girlfriend and her team would leave again tomorrow. Lia made sure your new Sensor was working well and checked in on your blood sugar with her Phone every so often.

After the end of the Season you indeed got a three years contract with Arsenal and moved in with Lia. Things were perfect. Your Love only kept on growing.

[emshiftss]

‧ new year's shifting pick a pile ✧ ‧˚₊ ❆ ‧ ₊ ⊹˚

{ i've been meaning to do another collective reading but honestly forgot, but hey it's a new year so... this will just be anything you may need to hear right now. i hope you find what you were looking for, and if i was able to help in any way then i'm glad. and just like any other reading you find, take what resonates and leave what doesn't }

❆ take a deep breath... and choose the pile you're most drawn to...

✿ PILE ONE ⋰˚☆

KEYWORDS/SIGNS: rain, orange slices, pie, hot tea, 777, gloomy weather, allergies, ears ringing, dogs barking/whining, 222, trust, hourglass, boredom, keys, heart ache, homesick, road trips, four leaf clover, golden child, shaking hands

❆ a decision, a choice. is this right? am i making the wrong choice? let’s take a deep breath ok? it seems you are at a crossroads of sorts. perhaps you don’t know what to do with yourself when it comes to your shifting journey. that’s ok! whatever this issue is for you specifically, i believe you already have they answer. let’s slow the roll, take some deep breaths and try to see this clearly. to me it seems you are over consuming information. i suggest you log off of social media for a bit, sit with yourself and look over the information you already have, discard what no longer fits you and keep what works. you know you best! some random person online cannot (unfortunately) fix your supposed problems for you. no matter how much advice you seek, you can only do that. you need to let go of this internal struggle, you are only fighting yourself, creating resistance. if the answers still seem to be foggy to you, perhaps you can meditate and look for the answers there.

❆ it seems your mind might be in the midst of chaos, or perhaps your life is as well. yet when it comes to your shifting journey you may just be on the brink of a spiritual awakening you desire (or need). the clarity is within YOU. it looks like you are walking down this path with a blindfold on, unsure of where you are going, what choices to make. maybe there is something you don’t want to face. but these fears and worries do not need to hold you back. let’s try to use them to your advantage. face what is holding you back and if you just can’t rid it, know that it does not stop you, only shows a different part of yourself.

❆ instead of putting your journey and motivations on others, it’s time to look within. there’s only so much more “new” information you can gain. your journey is yours and yours alone. that doesn’t mean it has to be a lonely one though. trust that you have the answers, and trust that there is still a community for you! having so many different pieces of information and advice forced upon you to try and digest and make use of is not helping you. sit with yourself and ask yourself if there is genuinely anything you still need to learn from others at this point? at what point do you let it all go and just use it to your benefit?

❆ maybe creating some sort of routine will help you as well, setting up some self-discipline. on the flip side you may need to let go of perfectionism as well. you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. shifting is supposed to be fun. maybe reflect on what you can do to make this all the more enjoyable. let go of the process and remember where you started.

SONGS ✧

‧ ₊ escaper - sarah kinsley

“ everything changed

but my mind couldn’t change me ”

‧ ₊ wildflower - beach house

“ need a companion…

a hidden prayer

you know your not losing your mind

what’s left, you make something of it ”

‧ ₊ eye contact - fromis_9

“ When I closed my eyes and felt it, there was a small gap between you and me

I want to see you again, I want you so…

When you look at me, the moment I started believing in eternity

When I look at you, it was possible because of you ”

METHOD SUGGESTION ✧

{ remember you don't need a method! }

‧ ₊ void/pure conscious

‧ ₊ julia method

✿ PILE TWO ⋰˚☆

KEYWORDS/SIGNS: waterfalls, cinnamon, 444, crows, 88, water damage. doubles, holiday, patience, crowns, one of a kind, eye on the prize, chocolate cake, stars

❆ let’s take a moment to give yourself a pat on the back! give yourself space to celebrate your accomplishments, big or small, bright or dim. it’s ok to reflect and give yourself credit for all you’ve done, someone has to, and you deserve it. you are at a place of harmony and balance in your journey. embrace it! know that you already have it, and if necessary take a breather, pause and look around yourself. look at all you’ve achieved! it will still be here for you, even if you take a break from it all. whether it’s here or in your desired reality, you are surrounded by so much love and support. even on your worst days. your vision is clear, if you're ready, know that it is yours, and make that first step. perhaps all you need is a little reassurance, you got this!

❆ you’ve clearly invested a lot into yourself and your journey. your hard work will pay off, you just need to sit back and let it. perhaps you are confused over slow results. yet you should persist, for it is already yours. stay in a mindset of gratefulness, if needed share your feelings with someone, talk it out.

❆ stay steady and clear, you are on the right path. if victory is what you want, victory is what you’ll get. you are just on the verge of making a breakthrough. keep going. embrace all your ideas and write them down. let yourself create your vision, live in that moment. your creativity is your strength. you may be overwhelmed with the excitement, all the possibilities. harness it and let it push you further. it is all up to you.

SONGS ✧

‧ ₊ mariners apartment complex - lana del rey

“ i ain’t no candle in the wind

i’m the board, the lighting, the thunder…

they mistook my kindness for weakness ”

‧ ₊ numb - men i trust

“ please forgive me if i ever did you wrong

i’ll be your candle; burn me upside down ”

‧ ₊ moon song - beabadoobee

“ i’m lying on the moon

my dear, i’ll be there soon

it’s a quiet and starry place

time’s we’re swallowed up

in space we’re a million miles away ”

METHOD SUGGESTION ✧

{ remember you don't need a method! }

‧ ₊ intention

‧ ₊ lucid dreaming

✿ PILE TWO ⋰˚☆

KEYWORDS/SIGNS: love, pairing, 555, daydream, interruptions, cats, heartbreak, lonesome, tears, sleeping in, not sleeping enough, castles, cages, 333, 1212, floating

❆ it has been a long journey for you, a hard one at that. you may have found yourself in many setbacks. perhaps you blame yourself, there’s a lot of sadness and anger here. in this moment you can choose forgiveness, forgive yourself and know that it’s all ok. whatever has happened, there’s no use for guilt. open up to a friend, a stranger, someone. vocalize your feelings and hardships. with mistakes you can learn and grow from them, and ultimately come out stronger in the end. show yourself grace and love, and set your eyes on newer and better things. know that no matter what you can still trust yourself. take small steps and build yourself back up. find the romance and beauty in shifting again, it’ll always be there.

❆ i see that you may be someone shifting for love. keep your partner in mind. despite everything, please remember you are deserving of love and happiness. keep your love close to you. just as you wish to be with them, use it to bring you two together. your emotions are not a flaw, feel them, sit with them, BE them. wherever you are and where you want to be, what are you feeling? are you in your bed? perhaps the arms of your lover. whoever you want to be, FEEL IT, let your compassion drive you forward. there’s no need to be embarrassed over your feelings, they are valid, and so are you.

❆ you need to make the decision. you can’t sit in despair forever, pick yourself up and know that there are better things for you. use it all to your advantage, all the bad just as the good. being interrupted during a meditation? that’s fine, it doesn’t have to stop you forever. Distracted? that’s ok, take a deep breath and know that it doesn’t have to hold you back, unless you let it. you don't have to have the most squeaky clean mindset ever to shift, that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense does it? accept where you are at, and accept where you want to go.

SONGS ✧

‧ ₊ whale - kim sejeong

“ i find you hidden in the dark night sky

when i walk on the purple road among the clouds

Can I face you only at the end of the darkness?…

Where did you disappear

i miss my whale…

time has become today in front of you ”

‧ ₊ high - slow pulp

“ i have to much in my pockets

i wish they were empty…

my limbs are feeling lazy

why won’t they work with me?

and now i can’t seem to focus my eyes

won’t let me see ”

‧ ₊ sweet nothing - taylor swift

“ they said the end is comin’,

everyone’s up to somethin’

i find myself runnin’ home to your sweet nothings…

to you, i can admit that i'm just to soft for all of it ”

METHOD SUGGESTION ✧

{ remember you don't need a method! }

‧ ₊ fives senses

‧ ₊ staircase method

‧ ₊ wake back to bed

[vxxcte]

to add on to this with my own idea:

I think s3 might get a little boring if all of Gi-Hun’s POV for some episodes was spent watching him watch the games. he would spiral and get fucked up to some degree of course but that can be difficult to portray in a live action, if the settings and actions of a character are limited.

so what if gi-hun, while having to watch these games, was given the power to also alter the way the games must be played? think in s1 when they turned off the lights on the glass bridge. I think that would be interesting to see and would also add a twist rather than him just being forced to watch.

it would make him more akin to a VIP, but it also gives him the opportunity to help out the other players, a chance to try and minimize the deaths. and maybe in-ho would pull some sick move of his own. he could add his own alterations to the games so that instead of lessening the collateral damage that gi-hun intended his changes to bring, the combination worsens it.

or maybe in-ho doesn’t have to do anything at all to counter gi-hun. a big theme in squid game as a show is about how certain situations bring out the worst in people. every time gi-hun has tried to save these people, it has backfired on him without outside interference because they did not want to be saved and they did not want anyone else to be saved.

it could happen again if he has to watch and only interfere from a distance. it would happen in a completely new way, when gi-hun has been given this much power to try and help these people but it ends up doing more damage because of the people he is helping.

the system is utterly broken and doomed, and it’s because of the people in it. and it would line up with what in-ho told him before, and it would break gi-hun because maybe il-nam was right all along.

being super vague here of course but this is just food for thought, imagine what this kind of situation would do to gi-hun. and imagine what it would do to their whole dynamic that is (unknowingly on gi-hun’s end) based on having or letting go of faith in people’s humanity.

I think this prediction is quite wide spread but I'm really curious to see what will happen to Gi hun after In ho killed Jung bae.

I've seen people bring this up and feel like it would be sooo interesting, which is that In ho is not going to let Gi hun go back to the game but takes him with him to watch the Games unfold alongside him, to force him to watch his friends die, to force him to become something of a VIP himself in a way.

And on one hand I badly want Gi hun to go back to the other players, but on the other, this plotline would be so amazing. It'd be so interesting to see Gi hun grapple with that situation, and In ho just watching his downfall (because watching the Games and not being able to help will DEFINETLY wreck Gi hun, like he has such a savior complex and feels so responsible for everyone, so not being able to be there with his friends will destroy him).

Anywayyys I'm so hyped for season 3 but I sure know that they'll break our hearts. Like, it feels they'll go all out for the kills next season, since a lot of players we know survived until now.

[lostinlovingrevery]

He's Definitely Obsessed With You: Chapter 1

Plot: You're readjusting to life after a gunshot wound to the shoulder in Vietnam, figuring yourself out and navigating the waters of life back in the States. The only thing that really kept you steady was the thought of Logan, although after his letters to you dropped off, you still thought about him, and begin to wonder and doubt- if anything had ever been there between you two at all.

A/N: Okay, I PROMISE the next chapter will have more Logan. I really wanted to build on where reader was at in life both physically and mentally, and what they were going through. It's important I SWEAR. This also came out really long. I just kept typing and adding more and more to it. It's not perfect but if I don't post it now I'll never post it

Warnings: Reader gets horny af thinking about Logan (18+ please, although it's not super descriptive), mentions of blood and gore (not super in depth), politics regarding Vietnam, allusions to PTSD, and reader has anxiety and slight depression, mentions of nightmares mentions of weed, making out, etc. Probably spelling and grammar mistakes

Word Count: 6319

Prev<- ❤️ ->Next

CHAPTER 1: That’s Really Unhealthy Honestly

1971, New York City, New York

“You’re not going to pursue becoming a doctor?” 

You sat across from Doctor Frank Jones, the military doctor you were working under back in Vietnam. Today was your last day of physical therapy, rehabbing your arm and shoulder after getting shot in the jungle, a stray bullet hitting you- instead of the soldiers that stood guard around you while you were attempting an amputation on a young private, who had gotten stuck in a grisly dirt trap made by the Vietcong, and you were not able to get his leg out with the damage that had been done. Medics, doctors, nurses, were usually never targeted, either side knew not to hurt the people of medicine, that was just a rule of war, but that still didn’t mean you weren’t in any danger. 

Doctor Jones wanted to meet with you, having kept track of your progress when you returned to the states. It wasn’t his job to do so, but he was fond of you, and saw potential of making a good doctor out of you. You, on the other hand, weren’t so sure about it anymore. You hoped he wouldn’t push you.

Jones was a good man, a good doctor. He was older, and had served in the military a long time as a doctor. Salt and pepper hair, handsome, with a polite and genuine face that was beginning to see his years of military, worry lines that merely added to his character, he reminded you of an older version of Rock Hudson. His voice was steady and low, and he talked like a professor, quick and precise with his words. 

“Not now at least, I haven’t decided.” You informed him, cupping your mug of warm lemon herbal tea you ordered from the pleasant little coffee shop that you agreed to meet him at. It was in one of the less crowded neighborhoods of New York, but traffic and people were still bustling by the window, the door of the shop opening and shutting every few minutes, as a people came in to grab a coffee or a donut as they continued their daily routine, routine full of coffee, work, and some kind of personal dilemna, some angsty problem they face in their day to day life, and maybe a touch of romance, if they’re lucky. It was 8 in the morning, the world was waking up, and carrying on their lives.

As if there wasn’t a war going on. 

You have not exactly adjusted to your new life and routine. You had been formally discharged from the military, with some kind of honors, something your CO pushed for you, due to the work you did over in Vietnam. You didn’t really care about that though. You never joined the military for fancy honors and discounts, you joined because you wanted to help people. You had all your reasons why, your own personal backstory, but in the end it was just what you wanted to do. Although you do appreciate your CO vouching for you.  Now, you were left wondering what to do with yourself. A month of recovery and rehab, you spent it trying to figure out what you wanted to do when you finally were done with it all. Life back in the States was an adjustment, your sleep schedule was wrecked, a mixture of nightmares and insomnia. Your family and friends were happy to have you back, and you gotten countless visits from them- and while you were happy to see the familiar faces to, it felt weird just to jump into this new reality, where everyone is okay, happy, and not counting on you to save them. You’d think it give you some release, the pressure and stress dissipating the moment you got your discharge papers, but to be honest, you could never be more tense. 

It occurred to you that you had zoned out, staring at your tea that was slowly becoming cold, Doctor Jones having called your name multiple times, and it wasn’t until he gently touched your arm that drew you from your thoughts. 

“Have you seen a therapist?” He asked you, concern spread across his face. 

“What?”

“I get returning back to reality after what you went through can be…disorientating. There’s nothing wrong with searching for some help.” He says gently, letting go of your arm and returning to his espresso. 

“Reality?” You sat back in your chair, sitting your tea on the table, your voice tinged with irritation. “Felt pretty real back there.” 

“You know what I mean.” He mutters. “So, have you?”

“No.” You shook your head. It wasn’t that you saw anything wrong with therapy, or that you had trouble admitting you needed help. You were still adjusting, and you just weren’t ready to go and start working through the last four years of your service in ‘Nam. You wanted to figure out your next step, and get yourself settled first. “I will, I just want to figure things out first.”

He nodded. “So, are you planning to stay in New York?” 

You pursed your lips together, and shook your head. “Probably should, since my familys nearby. Honestly though the city just…isn’t where I want to be right now.” You said, your mind flashing with the place you did want to go. Somewhere you originally planned to just visit, but now your mind- your trusty gut instinct, was telling you that maybe it’s where you should be all along. “I’m thinking of moving out into somewhere small.”

“Ah, searching for a little peace and quiet?” He hummed, a tight lipped smile. You returned the same smile back and nodded, hunching in your seat a little bit. 

“Yeah, it’s…a place in Canada. In Alberta, a small little town.” You say. A look of surprise came across his face. “A friend, told me about it. He was from there and he always talked about how beautiful it was. He always thought I’d enjoy it, long as I get used to the harsh winters.” Your smiled turned into something warmer, as you thought about Logan. There was an ache in your chest though, something in your heart. 

You weren’t able to say goodbye to him. He wasn’t there when you got shot, and everything happened so fast, as they had thrown you onto the closest evac to get you to some medical hospital, since no one could take care of you there the way you did for them. When your belongings got sent back to you, sent to the hospital you were staying at in the States, he had written a letter, urging you to rest, and a heartfelt apology for not being there for you. It was that, and a polaroid photo one of the medic boys took of you two, his arm around your shoulder, his body turned to you, as he practically glared at the camera in his trademark expression, yet still managing to look handsome as always, and you, a big smile on your face, your hand up in a “victory” sign, which somehow turned into a symbol of peace in this era, and you were leaning in to him. You keep it on you all the time, a small comfort of him carried in your bag or pocket.  You of course quickly wrote back to him, telling him everything that happened, and expressed how deeply you missed him. It was unusually emotional for the both of you, considering you typically took jabs at each other, and joked around more often than not. Yet you both were always able to open up to each other- without fear of judgement. It was true, you missed him, and despite the fact that you were home, surrounded by loved ones, you felt more alone than ever because he wasn’t there. Perhaps that’s why you’re chosing to move to his hometown. 

“That sounds nice.” He nods, noticing the way your cheeks turned pink at the mention of your friend. “Well, I’m sorry to hear you’ll be putting off med-school. I’m glad you’re taking the time to rest though, that’s more important.”

“Thank you.” You say softly. “It’s not a permanent decision. I just want to figure myself out-”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me. You have a good head on your shoulders. I know whatever you do will be the right thing. I simply want to just encourage you.” He stops you, holding a hand up, and then using that hand to brush his hair back, before resting it on the table. Despite his words, his body language told you he was slightly disappointed. “If you do however, change your mind-”

“I’ll call.” You smiled. You knew why he wanted this for you. Society was changing, while women doctors were not unheard of, it was still a rarity. It was part of the reason why you weren’t sure about going to med-school, you weren’t sure if you were ready to face the scrutiny that you would surely get. Not that anything like that has ever stopped you before, but Vietnam had changed something in you, you were lost in yourself and what to do, the world was moving so fast around you and you couldn’t keep up. He smiled back. “What about you?” You asked him, 

“I’ll be staying in New York. I was called to work on a project not far from here.”

“You’re still in the military?”

“Of course. With the injury I sustained,I can’t go back to ‘Nam, I wouldn’t be fast enough to work the pace it’s like there. They figure I’m more useful with this project, will supposedly help with the war effort.” 

“Help with the war effort?” You asked, annoyance creeping up your stomach. “Surely you don’t still think this war is necessary, right? It’s gone on long enough?” 

“Of course. I still feel a duty for my country though. I don’t blame you for feeling the way you do-”

“Frank, c’mon.” You scoffed. “There’s no reason to be over there. I watched so many young boys, and men, die, or get so messed up they lose apart of themselves-”

“I know, I was there too-”

“Then you shouldn’t want to help with the effort.” You voice rose a bit, filed with tension and anger, falling back into your seat and crossing your arms. “Every little thing you do for them, in regards to Vietnam, just keeps this war going, those boys over there - innocent people in that country are still dying and-” You stopped yourself, as he looked at you with indignation. “Sorry.” You mutter. 

“I get your frustration. I do believe the war should end, and I believe If I help with the effort, then perhaps I can help make things end faster too.” He explains himself calmly. Your hands were shaking, it wasn’t the first time you gotten heated over the topic of Vietnam since you’ve been home. It frustrated you to no end watching people endlessly argue on whether it should happening or not. Taking a deep breath, you nodded, sipping at your tea, now having gotten cold because you completely forgot about it. 

“Lets…just move on.” You suggested, feeling like if you linger on the thought of ‘Nam any longer you were going to burst in the middle of the shop. He nodded, and you listened to Doctor Jones ramble on, mentioning he couldn’t give you details on the project, but it was exciting nonetheless. Then he switched to talk about his kids, his son having turned into a huge hippie - which ended up making you laugh, as Jones was very patriotic for the most part, loyal to the country, but he seemed to understand and accept his sons opinions and lifestyle. Perhaps his injury had given him a new perspective on life, a new meaning, even if he was still aiding the military…

You, though, you were still trying to find your meaning.

1972, Alberta, Canada

“Oh shit!” 

You yelped as you stepped outside the porch of your house, into the freezing cold air that surrounded you. You wrapped your arms around you in attempt to warm yourself, as you quickly ran down the steps of your porch and to the mailbox. The metal door immediately froze your fingers as you pulled it open, peering inside for mail, and you spotted two envelopes. You reached in, snatching them and quickly ran back into the house, stomping your feet on the outdoor rug that sat in front of the door, and kicking them off once you stepped into the warmth of your house, the heat cloaking around you- just biting at the cold that stung your cheeks. 

“Girl you are CRAZY!” 

You smiled at your roommate, Rose Mitchell, a lovely yet feisty woman, around your age. You met her at your current job, nursing at the “local” hospital. (Not so local, but it’s the closest hospital to this little town you’ve moved too.). She was a new nurse too, and you invited her to be your roommate at the shaggy little house you found and slowly worked on fixing up. You had the money to be on your own, but you and Rose had become fast friends, despite being polar opposites in some ways. 

You loved rock music, but she was all about pop and that new disco, and you both found balance in enjoying jazz. Your styles couldn’t be more different as well, you sported jeans, bellbottoms, band shirts, jumpsuits, crop tops, the more comfortable style of clothing in this new era you were finding yourself in, while she wore short skirts, leopard prints, heels, tight dresses that barely covered your thighs- and she looked damn good in it. With such opposite styles of clothing, it guaranteed you wouldn’t steal each others clothing. You admired Rose for her honesty and confidence, her ability to fit in anywhere and everywhere because she was sure of who she was. She didn’t allow society to turn her into something she was not, especially with the discrimination she had to face growing up. She was a party girl, and why she decided to move to this small town with you, instead of the bigger city where your work is located, you won’t understand- but she had become your closest friend, another girl you could talk about those girl things with. She was close to your height when she wasn’t in heels, had a beautiful natural afro that she was quite proud of, and dark brown eyes that matched her skin color. She’s the only reason you haven’t technically become a hermit yet, as she pushed you out of zone, making you go to parties and bars and concerts with her nearly every weekend - and while at first you dreaded it, you began to grow to enjoy the time and memories you were making. In fact, you’ve really begun to start building a life for yourself here. 

When you first moved here, you were still struggling with yourself, adjusting to your life, a new job, and a completely new environment compared to New York, that you were previously residing in. You were shutting yourself off from people, staying in the comfort of your home, trying to pick up old hobbies you left behind before you had joining the army medics. You believed yourself to think that you were doing fine, but the longer you went, the more anxiety began to build inside you, nightmares plagued you, and you even found yourself growing paranoid when out alone in public, afraid of getting jumped, of getting shot. As much as you didn’t want to do it and begin to work through the trauma of it, you forced yourself into therapy. It got you to be a little lighter, to open up, which is how you ended up talking to Rose, and how she ended up your roommate. Slowly, as you were working through things, life became a little brighter, and less lonely. You made new friends, new connections. You still struggled deep inside, there were still days where’d you feel haunted by the ones left in Vietnam, men who always appeared tough as steel, clinging to you and sobbing, young boys begging for their moms to save them, the blood and the gore you witnessed that no human should witness. You’d have these impulsive urges, to pack up and go back to the country and do something. You may not be able to save every life but you could at least provide comfort to them, you could help, but you knew better. Going back wasn’t the answer. Looking back wasn’t the answer. It was time to move forward, and you always been good at embracing the future.

The only thing missing, was him

Rose was curled up on the couch, a blanket settled over her, as she had a book in one hand and tea that you made her in the other. “You are so obsessed with the mail, it’s really unhealthy. Just because your waiting for a man to write” She clicked her tongue. 

You sorted through the two envelopes, one addressed to her, which you flicked at her playfully, it flying across the room like a boomerang until she smacked it away with her hand, gasping dramatically at your audacity. You giggled, looking at the other envelope- it was addressed to you, but it wasn’t from who you wanted it to be from. You groaned, dropping your shoulders. Roses smile faded. 

“Nothing?” She asked. You shook your head, setting the envelope into a basket, stacked with mail addressed to you that you didn’t care to open. “Sorry hun….” She says sympathetically as you move to sit next to her, crisscrossing your legs. 

“I don’t get why he hasn’t been writing.” You say, bringing your nails up and chewing, an anxious habit you’ve formed. 

“He’s probably just busy.” She wrote. “You’ve been over there, didn’t you say you can’t get a break some days?” 

“Yeah…” Your eyes stared at the ground. As embarrassing as it was for you to admit, his letters were like a lifeline for you. You had been writing back and forth a little over a year now. You excitedly told him about moving to his hometown- even bought a polaroid and took pictures of the town, the forests, and your house to send back to him. You wrote about your job, and the friends you’ve made. He’d tell you about the things going on over there, the camp you were at has now been taken down, moved to a different location, nearby a village, he’d tell you the antics he and the others would get up too- and complain about how the new doctor that was assigned to the camp was a huge asshole, and that he was glad he had self-healing abilities because then he wouldn’t have to deal with his smug ass. His letters would make you smile, and blush, because he’d often tell you he thinks about you a lot. You two shared feelings more easily through writing than you would in person, because putting your feelings on paper than saying it outloud was easier. Although you still hadn’t addressed the other feelings you had for each other, ironic, considering if anyone had read your letters- they would have thought you two were involved. 

“I hate seeing you like this.” Rose says, turning in her spot to face you. “You’re so depressed over a guy you haven’t even slept with!” 

Your eyes widen and you gasped. “What- No- I’m not! I’m just worried about him.” you felt your cheeks start to burn.

“Yes you are. Girl it ain’t WORTH it.” She exclaims. “You shouldn’t be getting all worked up over him. You got to focus on your OWN life. I mean, you’re breaking your own heart, and you sit here all worried about him and if he writes letters and all, what if he’s come back, and ya’ll do the nasty and he’s got a small -”

“Oh my god, don’t-” You interrupted her, holding you hand up to make her stop, “ and Uh, excuse me, I have focused on my own life.” You rolled your eyes. “I got a house, a good job, you!” You argued. “I’m happy. I get out and socialize, do fun stuff-”

“Yeah because I make you.” She crosses her arms. “You’re so heads over heels with this guy, who’s literally halfway across the world. You don’t date and you turn down every man that does ask you out!” 

“Just because I’m not interested in dating doesn’t mean it’s because head over heels, for Logan. We are literally just friends, nothing romantic. And DEFINITELY, nothing sexual like you’re claiming- you vixen.” You rolled your eyes. 

That was a lie. You were definitely hard for Logan. When you were in Vietnam, you were too busy to think about sex or any kind of personal pleasure. Then Logan showed up and your hormones flared to life for the first time in a long time and haven’t stopped since - leaving you with the biggest, non-stop hard on you ever had- even if he isn’t here. Now your home and it’s so much worse. The only temporary relief you get is late nights alone with you, your hand, and your imagination. Hell any moment you’d see him shirtless around camp, or even just think about him shirtless, had you soaked within seconds, with his hard pecs covered in coarse hair, his chiseled stomach, hard abs that flexed anytime he strained his muscles, which led to a happy trail below his pants, a prominent vein that travels up from below his pants- that you have spent more time than you care to admit, staring at in secret. You’d watch how his biceps flex as he carried heavy boxes and guns, and you’d wish he’d put you in a headlock with them as he railed you from behind. It filled you with guilt to feel like that over someone you did consider a close friend, but sometimes your mind wonders, and suppose you are just a lady…Embarrassingly enough, your CO had caught you staring at him in a dreamlike state multiple times, and reminded you to keep your head straight and out of the clouds, but you did notice he began sending Logan to give you your supplies and papers more often. 

“You so are. I see how you blush when you look at that picture of you two.” She points accusingly. “You need to get laid girl. And not just in your head.”  she continues, leaning over to poke at your temple. You laughed, shaking your head. You were becoming embarrassed at this conversation. Yes, it’s true. You didn’t have a sex life, or a dating life. It wasn’t as if you didn’t have the choice, you had plenty of opportunities, you’ve been asked out, flirted with. Some of the men Rose was friends with were handsome, charming, and would usually be your type- but you just didn’t want them. Maybe it was a little unhealthy, holding onto Logan, you guys were still just friends, no matter how often you may fantasize over him, and build up your relationship with him in your head. Your little bubble was about to pop, the more Rose spoke in your ear. “I’m serious!” She practically shrieks. “This is the most freedom us women have ever had when it comes to sex. Take advantage of it!” 

You rolled your eyes. She was right. Things were starting to change in the world- slowly, and for the better you hoped. Society was beginning to be more open and accepting, signifying that maybe things will start to get better. There was peace talks with Vietnam, the US was considering officially pulling out of the war. Even mutants weren’t getting the hard flack they usually were, albeit, they’re still getting painted as violent criminals in most parts of the states, but the government had dropped the bill that would put restrictions on mutants, and force anyone who was a mutant to identify and register themselves as mutants. Much to your relief. It wasn’t that you wanted to go around banging every guy you see - which is an activity that Rose pursued often, not that you cared, but you did just want that human connection with someone that just wasn’t over paper. 

 You weren’t ready to let go of Logan though, even if you’re starting to wonder if maybe you were setting yourself up for heartbreak, and not because he may have a small… Well, y’know, that was not important. He may be over there, writing letters to you with one hand, while he has another woman- who knows maybe another nurse- in his other hand. How’d you know he really feels anything for you? He hasn’t written a letter back in weeks. Part of you though knew better, Logan wasn’t the type, you’d seen if even when he didn’t know you were watching. While surely he was a man with desires, he’d never participate in the “locker room” talk you’d overhear many of the soldiers do. He’d sit there in silence, eating his rations, or sharping his knife, or staring into the fire, not joining in whenever they asked him if he had a type- or if he liked this particularly pair of tits on a playboy magazine that somehow got snuck into the camp. It was part of why you liked him, respectful, even if he was given all the room to be…well, a man. Another part of you still worried though, Vietnam was already dangerous, and even if he could heal, neither you- nor he, knew his limits in that. He was smart and knew how to survive, you heard the stories the other privates would bring back when they came back from patrols. What if he gets discovered as a mutant? You got by lucky, he may not. What if he’s not writing because he got too badly hurt? What if he got discovered? What if he was captured by VC? You couldn’t bear the idea of someone you cared about so deeply being hurt.

Maybe you were just overthinking everything. You do that often nowadays. 

Rose could see it on your face, as she moved to sit next to you, resting her head on your shoulder. “Well, I suppose I can’t blame you for holding out. He is pretty darn cute in that polaroid you’re so attached too.” She hums, making you both burst into giggles. 

1973, Alberta, Canada

“So, you were in Vietnam huh?” 

You stared blankly at the fellow that Rose has introduced you too. He was leaning against the doorframe, where you were standing just in case you needed a quick escape, but now that he was here, that wasn’t going to be an option anymore. He raised a brow waiting for an answer, but you were lost staring at the mustache above his lip. It was becoming a common style nowadays, and you heard a few friends start referring it as a ‘pornstache’. You didn’t want to know why. The thing looked like a giant fuzzy caterpillar on his top lip, and honestly, it was grossing you out.  

“Um. Yeah.” You say plainly. “I was a army nurse.” 

“Groovy.” He smirks, a small nod of his head. “Bet you’re glad the wars over then, right?”

“Yeah. Glad.” You nodded. You hugged your cup to your body, looking around the party that Rose invited you to. Well, invited was a nice way of putting it. She practically dragged you here kicking and screaming. 

President Nixon declared that the US and North Vietnam had signed an agreement, officially ending the war between the two. Troops have been pulled from the country, coming home to the States. It was great news, finally ending the dreaded conflict that shouldn’t have started in the first place. Celebrations popped up everywhere for the last few month as the boys came home, but it left you feeling solemn, you were worried about the fallout. What was going to happen now? These boys coming home, having gone through hell on Earth. You’ve had two years to adjust and learn how to live and cope. You’ve had support. What about them?

It’s been a year since you last heard from Logan. You had to resign yourself and accept that you may never hear from him again. You weren’t given the privilege in learning what happened to Logan. After a month had passed with no letter, you gave into your worries and attempted to make calls to find out what happened, and no avail. You either didn’t have clearance, or they didn’t know. It wasn’t like you couldn’t find his family and reach out either, he had no family aside from his brother who was there with him. You were just starting to let go- and for some Rose thought that meant you were ready to mingle. You weren’t sure yet but you definitely didn’t want to mingle with this guy. 

“Why’d you go over there?” He asked. “Beautiful lady like you, you could have stayed home, shoot the fat, hang the breeze.” 

“I…Really rather not talk about it.” You say, trying to show how disinterested you were. Hoping he would get bored and go away, allowing you to slip out unnoticed. He just smiled though, 

“You seem tense.” He reaches out to touch your arm, making your eyes quickly dart down to where he was holding onto you, your lips pursing together as you tried your best not to rip your arm away and cause a scene. 

“I’m fine.” You say, slowly pulling back from him. 

“We could always slip away from here. Get to know each other a little better?” He grinned, flexing his eyebrows sensually. “I could help you relax.” Now you just wanted to puke. 

“No thanks.” You say pulling yourself away from the door. You’ll just have to look for another way of escape. You entertained the party long enough. It was inside a huge house, spanning outside over a large decorated lawn- some friend of Rose who was apart of a rich family was throwing it to celebrate his cousin coming back from the war, which you could appreciate family appreciating each other like that. Your own loved ones had done something similar, accept with maybe less questionable substances hanging around all over the place. Honestly, it seemed more of an excuse for people to make out and get high, than celebrate said cousin. Although as you moved through the crowded rooms and halls of people talking, drinking, dancing to some kind of funk playing in the background, and smoking cigarettes and molly. You spotted said cousin, who was introduced to everyone that came in, sitting on the couch in the living room, with scantily clad women at either side of him, giggling and petting at his chest and thighs. Well, at least he was enjoying himself. You can get along with almost anybody, but this type of party just wasn’t your beat, and not to mention you already had a long day at work, you’d like nothing more than to go home, get into something comfortable, curl up on the couch with some warm tea, and watch Clint Eastwood movies. You could appreciate Rose supporting you and pushing you out of your comfort zone, but you figured out a long time ago that comfort zone or not- this was not your idea of living. You’ll support her all the way, while you sat in pajames and slippers at home.

Searching for Rose in the crowd, you found her making out in the corner with some tall, dark, and handsome guy clad in leather. For a moment you’d pondered how rude it would be, if you interrupted her, at the same time though, she’d be madder if you left without letting her know. 

“Rose- Rose!” You called her name over the loud music, before tapping her shoulder, and she tore away from the leather beast. Seriously, he was wearing a lot of leather. That couldn’t be comfortable. 

“Hey! What’sup?” She turned her full attention to you, one hand still holding onto the mans hip, assuring him she wasn’t leaving, but still wanted to make sure you felt heard. 

“I’m going home-” You spoke over the music. “But thank you so much for inviting me- I’m just, tired, you know?” 

“What, you didn’t like Jeffery?” She asked you, seemingly surprised, as if she hadn’t learned what your type is by now. You laughed, shaking your head. 

“No, but thanks.”

“Well, are you sure? About going home?” She asks worriedly. You grabbed her hand and squeezed it. 

“I’m just fine,” You say amused. “You’ll be alright?” 

“Girl,” She looked at the man, who was watching you both with amusement. She leaned in towards you, a huge smile spread across her face, her lipstick catching your eye, a bright pink, slightly smushed from her tongue dance with leather daddy behind her, as she lowered her voice, “I’ll be more than alright, that’s for damn sure.” 

You both laughed, as you playfully pushed her back towards him, you blew a kiss to her, and turned around with a small wave to Rose’s new playmate, as you managed to find the back door and leave, not wanting to risk going back to the front and running into Pornstache again. 

The house was on the other side of the small town you were living in. You and Rose had a car, but the weather was warming up, and you both decided a walk over, which was your way of planning to be able to escape on your own if you needed to. Hopefully your solo walk would be a little nicer, since the walk to the party, Rose ended up complaining because she wore heels on the walk over. 

You zipped up your bolero jacket, and stuff your hands into the pockets of your jeans as you made your way down the quiet streets, the music and smell of weed fading off with each step, leaving you with a clear head. You had to applaud yourself. If you were there a year ago, you would have likely gotten a panic attack, locked yourself in a closet or bathroom until things had quieted down, or Rose found you and got you home. This time though, you felt good- glad you got out- but you don’t feel that tight squeezing in your chest, the way your blood would began to freeze, as your limbs began to feel weightless, your vision becoming unfocused. Nope. Not this time.

Now you get to enjoy the air, and the spring breeze. 

Of course, your mind wandered to Logan again. It often did, you couldn’t help it. You still missed him. You’d find yourself rereading his letters, searching for any signs of why he may have never written back, but you could never see it. He seemed just as eager as you to write. You’d stare longingly at the polaroid, which you’ve retired to stay by your bedside table, since carrying it around so long as started to wear it out, fraying the edges. You’d walk around the town he’d grew up in. He said it looked different then, compared to when he was a kid, which you’d imagine since it was over a hundred years ago,but you still imagined what it’d be like to see him there, tell you what things used to look like, how things used to be. It’d been a long time since you seen him, and even though you had the picture, you could still close you eyes and picture every detail of his face and his voice. 

How pathetic

It’s been a year since you heard from him, and two years since you last seen him! You were so caught up your friendship with him, turning it into a fake romance in your head because you were lonely and didn’t want to admit that. You felt embarrassed at this whole thing. Why were you so hung up on one man, when there was plenty of others out there, that you could easily build a connection with just as you did with Logan. Okay, maybe you felt like he saw you the way nobody else could, maybe he was the first guy to ever make your heart flutter with just a smile, maybe he was the first person ever to have taken the time to really gotten to know you, your faults, your quirks, the way you like your tea….

Ugh!

Maybe that’s why it was so frustrating. Because you felt like you had found someone you could truly connected with, and somehow it had whittled away. You were grasping at what used to be a rope, hanging off of it in the darkness- attaching you to Logan, looking at you with those hazel eyes that still made your brain fuzzy as it did the first time you met him, even a year later of getting to know him while in Vietnam. The rope was now just a few pieces of string, and it was officially about to snap. Whatever happens, or happened to him, you could only hope that he was safe, and happy, wherever he was, as you closed your eyes, and felt it break. You had to move on. Right?

You opened your eyes and found yourself in front of your house. You were so lost in your thoughts, you don’t even remember half of your walk anymore. You sighed, hands sticking in your jackets pocket to pull out your house keys as you approached your porch. 

“Stuck in your head again, huh bub?” 

A familiar voice ripped you from your thoughts, as you swung around, dropping your keys in shock at the figure that stood at the end of the sidewalk, your breath stolen at the sight, 

And you smiled.

[fritzes]

and away we go! here are my two cents on the australian open draw. as always I try to be as unbiased as possible... but sometimes that isn't very possible. anyways, here it is:

wta:

I gotta say it's really weird not seeing iga in the top spot on the draw. so massive props to aryna. the fact that she's #1 is indicative of how great she's been, especially on hardcourt. she's the clear favorite, and her draw only supports that. her projected quarterfinalist is qinwen, her known pigeon. mirra is also lurking in this quarter, but when she beat aryna at rg aryna was very clearly ill, and she just beat mirra in brisbane. however, the bane of aryna's existence, donna vekic, is in this quarter but she's on the other side and could be beaten by someone like diana or qinwen. a lot of interesting names in this quarter, but I don't think any of them can beat aryna

coco was in great form at the united cup, but she's got her work cut out for her. her record against jess, the projected quarterfinalist, isn't great, and marta and paula being in the quarter is a little concerning. however, there are a bunch of players who could normally be threats that are completely neutralized by coco (I'm thinking karo, leylah, and penko), so that's a lot of seeds that are out of her way. naomi is also in this quarter and obviously has a great record at ao and has shown that she can do some damage at slams. if she's healthy, she can potentially make a run here

aryna vs coco is so interesting right now, and I think they can both get to the semifinal. aryna is #1 and this is truly her tournament, but coco's improvement over just the last few months has been great, and she was beating aryna even before that

I've already been seeing people write off jasmine, and I think that's a mistake. people forget that her first slam breakout was at ao24, not rg24, and she proved at united cup that she's very competent on this surface. that being said, a healthy elena is a pretty bad draw for her. she beat elena at rg and the wta finals, but elena wasn't fully fit and those were slower surfaces. I think this quarter has the weakest field (not to say there aren't good players, but the other three quarters have more). maybe dayana will make a surprise run again, or madi will have one of her random slam runs, but I'd for sure take the top seeds over the field here

and finally, iga's quarter. at the bottom of the draw. I'm still getting used to that, it's weird. it's interesting because if this draw came out a few months ago, I'd say emma navarro is super dangerous and could be a threat, but she's been in legitimately terrible form lately and I could honestly see her losing first round. if this draw came out a few years ago I'd say maria would go far, but she's been so lost for months now. I think ons jabeur could make a surprise run in the top half of this draw, she's been having some good wins lately and we know how capable she is at slams. I also think there's an opportunity for anna here, as well as vika who is known for being great at this tournament

jasmine has steadily been making her matches with iga closer, and this is a surface iga isn't comfortable on, so I think if that match did happen it could be pretty close

interesting r1 matches: sabalenka/stephens, tomljanovic/krueger, gauff/kenin, osaka/garcia, bencic/ostapenko, navarro/stearns, osorio/sakkari, alexandrova/raducanu, siniakova/swiatek

atp:

I swear they're giving jannik meme draws now. adm? bvdz?? holger??? hubi???? matteo????? TALLON GRIEKSPOOR????? strangely enough, the person who is the biggest threat to jannik is somehow stefanos tsitsipas, but he's on the other side of the draw and I highly doubt he will make it too the quarterfinals. besides, the last time he beat jannik really shouldn't have happened because of that line call in monte carlo. other than him, everyone in this quarter is someone jannik can comfortably, convincingly beat. I don't like to jinx players but he's the world #1 and this quarter is his to lose. on the other side, I do think adm can make the quarterfinals but based on that h2h with jannik, I'm not sure if he wants to

I think the second quarter is the most up in the air. taylor and daniil are both strong contenders to go deep in this tournament but with a lot of question marks around them. daniil because of his recent form and because his wife just had a baby, and taylor because of his mentality. we just don't know how he's gonna handle being a top 4 seed. this quarter is pretty stacked, with gmp, ben, lorenzo musetti, rublev, frances, and alexei. there are also some snaky contenders, like nakashima, shapo, arnaldi, and marozsan. to me, this is the hardest quarter to predict

I don't think I need to say anything about the projected semifinal. just look at the us open final scoreline. taylor has improved a lot since then, but he's just not at the level to beat jannik right now

djokovic/alcaraz quarter. I never thought we'd see the day. but there's a lot to get through before either of them can get there. opelka, who novak just lost to, is very close to him in the draw, as is tomas machac who beat him in geneva. grigor and jiri could also potentially make things difficult for him. on carlos' side, he has to deal with jack and korda who, despite his self-proclaimed greatness at wimbledon (and first round flopping), has actually done pretty well at ao. jack has some injury concerns, but when does he not? if we did get the projected quarterfinal and carlos and novak did play, I'd have to favor carlos but I'm honestly not sure? we haven't seen carlos play this season and ao is easily his worst slam, but novak just lost to opelka so. who knows

the last quarter is very frustrating and you know why. frankly I'm not in the mood to analyze it. I will focus on the top part though because there could be a major upset with felix and casper

interesting r1 matches: hurkacz/griekspoor, zhang/rune, tsitsipas/michelsen, shelton/nakashima, arnaldi/musetti, rindreknech/tiafoe, struff/auger-aliassimee

[dani4the6]

My right as a sick person is my spit cup

[doodlingwren]

It's 2024 can we please stop saying it's normal to trace or copying an entire drawing and pretending it's 100% your work? Just bc you changed the character or added clothes on a base you found on pinterest it doesn't mean you created original art

[lystring]

just love that amongst all the insane pushback people have been getting lately for talking very openly about fatphobia in our society which is a serious problem people are straight up reblogging posts adding severely triggering images of extremely anorexic people as some sort of Gotcha, like fatphobia Cant be real because Look how mean people are being about this person who is clearly dying from one of the worst diseases born Out Of Our Fucking Society Being Fatphobic im losing my mind what is happening etc

[anzfaulkner]

Ok yk what I think I need to run a poll I need to know what the pipeline is for ppl who like went to public school or didn’t have many friends or smth & basically had zero exposure to what is & isn’t socially acceptable until eventually branching out social circles and learning more

SO HERE IS THE QUESTION maybe this is actually a natural human experience maybe im just fucking autistic idfk. All I know is I’m still incredibly fucked up from smth that happened a decade ago and I’ve never bothered asking if anyone else has gone thru smth like it

[zhongli-lover-69]

hey girl is the room flooding or are you just happy to see me

[pygmi-says-hi]

STOP DOING THIS IN INJURY FICS!!

Bleeding:

Blood is warm. if blood is cold, you’re really fucking feverish or the person is dead. it’s only sticky after it coagulates.

It smells! like iron, obv, but very metallic. heavy blood loss has a really potent smell, someone will notice.

Unless in a state of shock or fight-flight mode, a character will know they’re bleeding. stop with the ‘i didn’t even feel it’ yeah you did. drowsiness, confusion, pale complexion, nausea, clumsiness, and memory loss are symptoms to include.

blood flow ebbs. sometimes it’s really gushin’, other times it’s a trickle. could be the same wound at different points.

it’s slow. use this to your advantage! more sad writer times hehehe.

Stab wounds:

I have been mildly impaled with rebar on an occasion, so let me explain from experience. being stabbed is bizarre af. your body is soft. you can squish it, feel it jiggle when you move. whatever just stabbed you? not jiggly. it feels stiff and numb after the pain fades. often, stab wounds lead to nerve damage. hands, arms, feet, neck, all have more motor nerve clusters than the torso. fingers may go numb or useless if a tendon is nicked.

also, bleeding takes FOREVER to stop, as mentioned above.

if the wound has an exit wound, like a bullet clean through or a spear through the whole limb, DONT REMOVE THE OBJECT. character will die. leave it, bandage around it. could be a good opportunity for some touchy touchy :)

whump writers - good opportunity for caretaker angst and fluff w/ trying to manhandle whumpee into a good position to access both sites

Concussion:

despite the amnesia and confusion, people ain’t that articulate. even if they’re mumbling about how much they love (person) - if that’s ur trope - or a secret, it’s gonna make no sense. garbled nonsense, no full sentences, just a coupla words here and there.

if the concussion is mild, they’re gonna feel fine. until….bam! out like a light. kinda funny to witness, but also a good time for some caretaking fluff.

Fever:

you die at 110F. no 'oh no his fever is 120F!! ahhh!“ no his fever is 0F because he’s fucking dead. you lose consciousness around 103, sometimes less if it’s a child. brain damage occurs at over 104.

ACTUAL SYMPTOMS:

sluggishness

seizures (severe)

inability to speak clearly

feeling chilly/shivering

nausea

pain

delirium

symptoms increase as fever rises. slow build that secret sickness! feverish people can be irritable, maybe a bit of sass followed by some hurt/comfort. never hurt anybody.

ALSO about fevers - they absolutely can cause hallucinations. Sometimes these alter memory and future memory processing. they're scary shit guys.

fevers are a big deal! bad shit can happen! milk that till its dry (chill out) and get some good hurt/comfort whumpee shit.

keep writing u sadistic nerds xox love you

ALSO I FORGOT LEMME ADD ON:

YOU DIE AT 85F

sorry I forgot. at that point for a sustained period of time you're too cold to survive.

pt 2

also please stop traumadumping in the notes/tags, that's not the point of this post. it's really upsetting to see on my feed, so i'm muting the notifs for this post. if you have a question about this post, dm me, but i don't want a constant influx of traumatic stories. xox

[arolesbianism]

Sigh sorry for the ranting I rly did want to be positive abt this update but unfortunately there's just too much negatives and too little stand out positives

[belfrygargoyles]

resolution for the year is to, if absolutely nothing else, look into job training programs i might be able to make use of. If Fucking Nothing Else

[ohnonotthehorrors]

Can I... talk about the theory that winners help craft the next game?

Because, and I really can not say this enough, it puts So Much into perspective.

Everything starts out Normal. Three lives, simple, cut and dry, there hasn't been a winner yet. No one to help craft the game. (And there's something to be said about how simple it really was. Not even a real expectation of the world becoming pvp or combative. No idea of the war to come)

Then Grian wins. The green killer, the man who vowed his first life to the one whose life he took. The next game the boogie man is born. A mechanic that allows and, in fact, demands, a green kill. People can trade lives back and forth, currency and debt wrapped up in one. (can we still be friends? Said the red partner. A life time later and reds are hostile, alone. Maybe it's an answer: No. Not anymore)

Scott wins this time. He refuses to play the game. He will not kill his team, he will love and he will do so fiercely and with all of himself. The next game people are attached through to their very souls. Every bit of damage to one soul is done to its twin. There is no boogeyman. (There is no way for a widow to be left without their love)

Pearl wins and she wins a blood bath. Spent the game draped in red, only wolves for company. Sitting in her tower, shivering in ice, maybe she wanted it to end. To see where it would. Limited life rewards you for killing, limited life has a clock tick tick ticking down, you always no how long you have. A curse yes, but a blessing too.

Now It's Martyn's turn.

And what a turn it is.

Keep your secrets, says the disloyal man, keep them well. Everything hurts, everything Matters, says the man fracturing with every loss. (What if we could love each other without hurting? Says The Hand, who never wanted to be coated in blood)

More importantly, Martyn has always seen the watchers below the surface. Now, they're right here in front of him. Something that could almost... be rebelled against, no? Something that someone else could finally point to and say: hey, hey isn't that familiar?

[ahalliance]

im watching étoiles valo and i’ll probably be too lazy to vod later but it sounds to me like a tubbo cubito is once again going through the Paranoia Horrors <3 but like that specific paranoia where your seemingly outlandish theories and thoughts actually have a decent amount of truth to them and it’s just the way they manifest/are expressed that is rooted in distrust and fear

[charlietheepicwriter7]

Despite Danny's best efforts, no matter how much time past, Amity Park refused to see Phantom as a hero.

Sure, there were pockets of support, particularly among teens, but most of the town blames Phantom for the property damage, saying if he didn't fight the ghosts then it wouldn't be so bad, to that time he got mind controlled by Freakshow and "attacked" the mayor. It wears him down. It wears Tucker and Sam down. Jazz can only try to support them all.

Then one day, a member of the Justice League visits. Someone minor, and kinda a jerk... maybe a Wonder Twin? Zan? Whatever. They don't investigate; they don't look deeper. They listen to the town folks and declare the ghost hunters, Red Huntress and the Fentons, to be the official heroes of the town.

Worse? Danny Phantom is officially considered a villain to the Justice League. Tuck hacks into the Watchtower and confirms that they have a file (a heavily inaccurate file) about how to defeat Phantom.

Danny doesn't think he can do this anymore.

A few weeks later, a young villain escapes into Amity and demands (begs) that Danny help them escape from the hero after them. No idea who, I can't find a lot of info on teen villains in DC, so let's fudge some ages and make it Kyd Wyckyd from the Teen Titans cartoon. Danny agrees, because to hell with the Justice Losers, and they defeat the hero, becoming friends in the process. Kyd confesses that they became a villain after being ostracized bc of how they look, and they've been trying to avoid villain organizations because HIVE was abusive, but it's really hard to be a villain alone bc of all the heroes.

Sam gets an idea. Tucker agrees with the idea. Jazz is just happy they'll end up making friends.

The next day, the Teen Villain Alliance is formed, ready to assist with any teenage illegal shenanigans their allies might get into.

Some notes:

It's created to be a healthier option for teen "villains" to connect with others and support each other.

It's more important that this is for Teens rather than Villains. They're tired of adult villains taking advantage of them. The TVA would rather ally with a teen vigilante than with an adult villain.

Again, no idea who the teen villains are, but Klarion is definitely here. He leaves the Light for the chaos of the TVA. Maybe Ember is there too?

Timeline wise, this is around when Tim is still Robin, but Damien has arrived at Wayne Manor.

This is because, when it comes time to try to infiltrate the TVA, they'll have a convenient child-assassin who has none of the monitors of a teen hero that Phantom immediately picks up on.

Damien, who at this point has been abandoned by his mother, dismissed and scolded by his father, and has had no success at carving his own place in the family, jumps at the chance. He is then surrounded by peers who don't insult him or try to change his behavior (too much; jazz is trying to help him find healthier methods of expressing himself). He... might not want to continue being a spy.

Danny, Sam, Tuck, and Jazz are the founding members.

Danny reinvents himself as the High Prince of the Infinite, Prince Phantom Dark. He got kingship from fighting Pariah Dark, but since he's still alive, he's only a prince. He steals the last name Dark as an intimidation tatic against those in the know; only Danny would have the balls to claim family with Pariah.

Sam works as a powerless villain, but she might no be powerless? Either way, Danny gives her a bunch of repurposed Fenton tech, and she buys the rest with her parents credit card. She does NOT care if that's traced back to the Mansons. She would choose something goth, maybe something spider related or even bat?

I love Pharaoh Tucker, so I think he should get magic powers? Since pharaohs of old were considered the balance between the real and the divine. He's still a tech guy, now he's a tech and magic guy.

Jazz isn't really a villain, more of a team mom who's planning on using everyone's psyche's as her thesis paper. You know what, that's her callsign, she's Psyche. Sometimes she flirts with Nightwing.