#so the most logical reaction to this would be something along the lines of

[oldtvandcomics]

So the funny thing in I Saw the TV Glow is of course that in-universe, The Pink Opaque's ending must be weird AF. Like, we don't talk about it because it works just too well as a metaphor, but that teens' TV show absolutely did end with both main character getting buried alive and kind of left there.

Except that, of course, our world has got wildly popular TV shows with similar ending, too.

So, may I propose the mental image:

You are out here, living your life. It kind of sucks, like there is this thing that isn't quite right, but you don't know what it is, so you are kind of existing without any greater joys or passions, but what can one do. Then your old friend, whom you haven't seen in ten years, randomly shows up, looking somewhat hectic, and announce: "So, remember that old TV show, Blake's 7? Turns out, I am actually Blake. The Federation caught us and is currently mind washing us to think that all of this is real. You need to wake up, Avon."

I genuinely don't know what I would do in this situation. But the idea is so fucking funny.

[azulhood]

It all started because of a school project, technically two projects, while it wasn't a world ending threat they set of a change reaction that lead to startling discoveries.

Mr Lancer had given the class the task of looking through their pasts and finding an life changing event that helped shape them into the person that were today and writing about that event.

It was a ten page essay (they were allowed to go over that limit) the more details the better and if you had something from that event to show (such as photos or keepsakes or really anything) you were awarded extra credit.

Danny's choice of event was the school field trip to a nearby museum he went on when he was seven, the space exhibit they had was what sparked his love for the stars and kick-started his dreams of being an astronaut.

It wasn't like he had any other choice (he doubted mister Lancer would accept 'my death' as a good life changing event)

He knew that he had photos of the field trip somewhere with all the other photos taken throughout his life, he just had to find them.

And after digging through thousands of boxes and piles of discarded inventions he handled with care (in case they blew up) he found them tucked inside an old photo album covered in green stains that sat on top of a bookshelf.

Opening the book caused all the pictures to fall into his lap, it seems like his parents didn't get around to actually adding them to the book, Danny resigned himself to spending the rest of his day shifting through old photos.

It wasn't all bad though, he found pictures of when Sam still had blonde hair and wore pink and of that time Tucker wrote an 'I love you' on his parents cars with their keys and many other embarrassing photos.

A treasure trove of blackmail material.

He finally found the picture he was looking for.

All of the kids who are now students of Casper high stood in front of an old building each proudly holding up something they bought in the gift shop (Danny had bought a book on planets that had long ago fallen apart)

It was a normal photo.

And yet, something seemed off.

Sam and Tucker were there with him in between them, Dash was there too.

Along with Kwan, Mikey, Paulina, Valerie, and all the others.

And yet, something was missing.

Then it hit him.

Wes wasn't there.

Danny could've sworn that he had been on that trip, but the more he thought about it the less he was sure.

He couldn't actually remember Wes being there and Danny remembered nearly everything about that trip.

'Maybe he was sick or something?' It was the most logical thing he could think of to explain the other absence, that and his parents not wanting him to go for some reason.

Mystery solved he pushed it to the back of his mind , he had an essay to finish.

Still, it stuck with him.

-----------------------------

The next school project Lencer gave them was one with assigned partners.

Danny got Wes who, despite not being Sam or Tucker, was leagues better then Dash and he'd take that as a win.

Wes had insisted on studying at his house so he could, and Danny quotes "Keep an eye on you Fenton"

Danny could practically feel the hidden cameras burning a hole into him while he stood in front of the Weston's door, waiting for him to go ghost for whatever reason.

Jokes on him though, Danny asked all the ghosts to leave him along for this month with the promise of giving them a head start the next time they caused trouble, so really Wes was just wasting his time.

"This way." Wes said already heading inside without caring if Danny followed.

Being the first time he had ever been in Wes's home Danny looked at everything and anything.

It was a fairly normal home, not like Danny's which had an anti-ghost defense system or Sam's super rich house.

But more like Tuckers

One of the things that drew his attention was the pictures that lined the walls.

There were so many.

Some with Wes and his mom, some with just him, some with just his mom, and some with people Danny didn't recognise.

But there were no baby photos.

The only pictures Danny could find of a young Wes seemed to be from when he was eight? Nine?

And nothing before.

'Maybe they were put away in storage' Danny guessed, but it still made his brain itch.

He remembered looking at old school photos and not finding any sign of a young Wes at all, he didn't even remember Wes coming to school any time before the year Danny turned eight.

And in a small town where everyone knew everyone that really wasn't possible.

'Maybe they moved here and lost a lot of stuff' Which would explain a lot, well no harm in asking. "Did you loss a lot when you moved here?"

Wes stopped walking and turned around to give him a look that asked if he was insane. "I've lived here my whole life, Fenton."

Danny froze, that couldn't be right, he'd remember that.

Something was wrong.

---------------------------------

Tim Drake sat in front of the bat computer as the rest of his family patrolled.

He had one monitor displaying the other bats locations while all the other monitors were used to show him files, or rather the lack there of.

Wayne Enterprises had tournaments held for schools and the prize was an all express paid trip to Gotham and tour of WE and surrounding areas, Tim could think of way better prizes that weren't visiting the crime capital of the world but that wasn't the point.

What was the point was that every time there was a winner Tim preformed a routine background check on students and staff (and by routine he means learn their whole live story) just in case anyone happened to be trained assassins set to kill one of them, stranger things have happened.

Wes Weston was one such student whose background Tim had to check.

And he found nothing.

Sure, there were hospital and school documents from age eight and upwards, but other then that nothing.

There was no birth certificate, no evidence of him attending daycare, nothing.

It was as if Wes did not exist before he was eight years old.

And perhaps the most interesting thing.

Amy Weston was listed as Wes's biological mother, DNA even said as much, and yet Amy's medical file said that she had never been pregnant and also had no siblings that could've been Wes's parent.

And yet Wes existed, appearing one day as if he had always been there.

Was it cloning? Aliens? Magic? A changeling? Someone creating false information to hide the truth?

It was a mystery, and mysteries had always been Tim's Kryptonite.

[iphyslitterator]

https://www.tumblr.com/iphyslitterator/781529944758091776/fascinating-phenomenon-that-the-buddie-fandom-is?source=share

My theory: the buddie fandom members are more inclined to reject (and even to rebel) against something that they don't agree with (or causes them pain) and are willing to believe in any sign that may indicate that what they want is in fact happening, even if it's against all logic; while the BT fandom members seem more grounded in reality, recognizing what's happening and being able to accept it (which doesn't mean they can't manifest their disagreement), despite the pain said reality may cause.

is this an age thing (buddies skewing younger and BTs skewing older)? a cultural thing (religious background / education / literacy levels)?

I'm intrigued by this.

Yeah, I've been thinking along these lines, i.e. that it's about the dominant modes of reading in each fandom.

The most prominent Buddie shippers believe Buddie's going canon, and that involves a lot of reading between the lines: the show is sending you subtle messages, the signs are obvious to the skilled ("media literate") interpreter, of course they wouldn't spoil things in interviews. The gifset of alleged season 8 foreshadowing for Bobby's return fits right into that - attention and close reading are supposed to reveal the hidden truth.

I love the point about the tendency to reject/rebel against canon, which is linked to an investment in canon: this thing that you want isn't happening onscreen, and that's unacceptable, so therefore it will, it has to (and it's so important for it to happen, there may be no way to convince you that it won't).

Whereas the Bucktommy fandom did the exact opposite in the wake of the breakup: we both accepted canon and distanced ourselves from it. Even as more people got more hopeful for a reconciliation, our main project in the hiatus was to solidify into a fandom that could survive without the show. At the same time - and it wasn't immediately clear this would happen - we started heavily incorporating 8x06 material into our readings. The prevailing characterization of Tommy shifted significantly. We dive deep into their communication issues. We hated the episode, but we decided to take a lot of it at face value and turn it into a "better" story.

To avoid the "grounded in reality" value judgment for a minute, I'd say the Bucktommy fandom leans more pessimistic. Believing in the Buddie long game requires optimism, faith that the show is intentional and patient. Bucktommy fans are more likely to express cynicism about Tim Minear and distrust in the show; taking the text at face value/arguing that the show "isn't subtle," even if accurate, is related to the general post-breakup wariness. (It's also related to having a canon ship - we never had to excavate it, it was happening onscreen.)

Of course the Bucktommy fandom has also already coped with the sudden loss of a beloved character; a lot of us were processing a lot of grief in November, and I think even the people who were clowning early reconciled themselves to the possibility he wouldn't come back. The irony is that we were wrong, and Tommy did return! But the experience still primed a lot of us to start grieving Bobby and coming to terms with his death quickly. (It's also ironic that we're taking the press at face value, but the Peter farewell tour is so much more extensive than the Lou "exit interviews" that believing it seems like the smart/realistic/pessimistic thing to do.)

I'm unwilling to generalize about demographics without hard data, and I think we overinterpret the age thing. There are plenty of younger Bucktommy fans, and plenty of older fans with the reactions or behavior people sneer at as juvenile. I'd tentatively say the fact that many of our most prominent writers are late 30s or older has shaped the fic landscape, and the unusually high percentage of queer men has influenced the culture. But whether this has any bearing on the Bobby alive vs. dead debate, I couldn't say.

[atrophiedemotion]

ivantill cafeteria scene analysis

keep in mind that this is fully just my personal opinion and interpretation of the scene okay cool

the cafeteria scene from round 6 has always been really interesting to me, and i've seen a lot of people take it different ways, so i just wanted to walk through my view of it because it's such a telling scene about their dynamic more recently than as kids

the scene starts with a shot of till during the round that looks to be from ivan's pov, showing us what he's seeing in the moment, and flashes back to one of ivan's memories from anakt.

considering the almost identical expressions till is wearing in both shots, it seems to be ivan thinking back to a time he saw till look the way he does in round 6- miserable, hopeless, defeated. like he's given up.

we then see ivan noticing till's apparent resignation and shitty mood (because of course he notices, it's his personal watching till time after all), then getting up to go bother him. i say 'bother him', and it definitely looks like that's what he's doing, but i don't think that's ivan's goal. i think ivan's goal is to comfort, or at least distract till.

despite their juvenile fights, we've never seen ivan actually want to cause till true harm. his lyrics in both black sorrow and cure are caring and reverent, making it apparent that ivan really does just love and care for him and just wants to be able to do things for till. this is furthered ofc by the whole post-club scene where ivan looks absolutely devastated seeing the state till is in.

i always reference back to my mirroring post bc it explains the way i imagine ivan's train of thought, and it applies here again. ivan does not know how to comfort till in a conventional way (probably for a few reasons; till is different from the other students, both in the way he acts and displays his emotions, and in ivan's opinion of him. till is special to ivan, he usually drops his mask around him so meaningless platitudes wouldn't be right) but he does know how to get till's attention on him and out of his own head.

all this being said- what ivan does next:

he swipes his hand across the cut on till's cheek. yeah, i know, definitely not what most people would consider 'comforting their friend' but that's what makes sense to ivan. 'how could i possibly distract him if he seems to ignore me most of the time?' (for now looking past the fact that till actually seems comfortable in ivan's quiet company, ivan's too single-focused to realize that)

and, well, i mean. he's right. till gets visibly disgruntled. he doesn't exactly look pissed as much as he looks caught the hell off guard, but it grabs his attention.

ivan, on the other hand, looks almost fond to me. i don't know, i just don't really think he looks smug even though i'm assuming that might be the general consensus. he almost seems a bit soft. to me, it looks like he's adoringly thinking, 'it worked. there, no time to be sad anymore, huh?' he probably is proud of himself for it, but not really in a selfish way.

till, of course, sees that it's ivan who's messing with him, and turns away.

i've also talked about this but at this age it really does seem like till's mindset when it comes to ivan is something along the lines of, 'oh, it's just ivan. he's fucking weird, that's just how he is' and more or less shrugs it off. he's used to ivan's "quirks" it seems.

this, till looking at ivan only to immediately look away, won't do. he only caught his attention for a few seconds, so i assume ivan's next logical move is to do something that will get an even bigger reaction. (ivan is a logical thinker, after all, at least in my perception of him)

so he. ya know. does that. which really seems like a great way to get himself punched, right? which honestly is also probably his plan. have till explode in anger, forget whatever happened for him to be injured in the first place, and ivan gets his undivided attention for a period of time. a win-win.

and you might be saying "oh, but couldn't ivan have just been doing that selfishly? we know his main goal is to get till to look at him." to which i say, yeah fair. i don't think this was done completely selflessly (i don't think anything ivan does is fully selfless but that's perhaps for another day) at all, he could've gone at it a different unconventional way if it was. but i think he probably sees it as mutually beneficial.

yes, it does seem like a way to show ivan wanting to keep till's eyes and attention on him. an example of how he seeks out till's attention no matter what, but the preceding shot of a hopeless till reminds ivan of this particular interaction for a reason.

there had to have been a motive behind what he did and why he did it then, and what we have to go off of for that is the first three shots. till wearing the same misery on two different occasions and ivan noticing. with that information, it's really not a stretch that this could be ivan's fucked up version of comfort.

[olderthannetfic]

There is something confusing to me about older queer people (which is to say, older than I am, at a relatively young 24 years old) who get mad at original fiction whose worldbuilding involves neopronouns. I'm hoping maybe, ONTF, since you've been in queer spaces a lot longer than I have, you can explain why people have such a negative reaction to the idea.

Basically, I'm working on a novel based that takes white-throated sparrow biology and uses it for building blocks in the same way A/B/O takes (now debunked) wolf science and used it for building blocks. This means there are essentially four genders, the two viewed as more intelligent (brown-haired men and women) and the two viewed as more physical (white-haired men and women). Those two groups then get further divided along the lines of 'women are better at making smart decisions under pressure' and 'men are better at staying home and defending the children, as God intended'.

So it seemed natural to me that this worldwide quaternary system would result in at least some languages having pronoun sets for each of the four options. Some languages in real life have more complicated pronoun systems than that, particularly ones where there's a bunch of formal and informal pronouns. It'd also help the reader keep track of who was a part of what group without my having to turn around and state people's coloration constantly. Yes, these people are human, just as humans in A/B/O are, but society is fundamentally very different. I'm not throwing this in to just complicate things or sound smart or something. It's here because my minoring in Anthropology and majoring in Linguistics taught me language usage reflects the needs and values of a people.

The writing group I'm a part of IRL is mostly queer, mostly 40+, with some cishet women who are also present and active writers. The writing group I'm a part of on DW is mostly DWRPers, in their 30's and up, though no older than 50, and entirely queer. I did not expect these to be groups that were uncomfortable with the idea of "different world, different pronouns".

Instead the reception has ranged from suggestions it's pretentious or overthinking things to requests I reconsider doing it. I've been informed this could be seen as mocking the real life queer people who go by pronouns other than she, he, or they. One person asked if this was went to be me "artificially justifying" nonbinary pronouns and implying I didn't find them valid in the real world. That was an awkward conversation, to say the least.

In reality I wasn't really thinking about real life people who use nonbinary pronouns when I was writing. I was just asking, "Logically, wouldn't it make sense for things to work very differently under a quarternary than it does under a modern European binary?" and following my brain along to its' conclusions as it processed that.

I have gotten zero negative feedback from my queer friends my age regarding this. So obviously, generation and the experiences informing a generational context are key, here. I'm just... still lost on how anyone finds this objectionable.

Help?

--

Ahaha. Oh god.

Well, as a reader of sff in the 90s, the first reaction I have to such things is "IS THERE A CONLANG AND A MAP?" Because, man, the conlang people were some of the most tedious motherfuckers I ever had to deal with in sff spaces.

But broadly... I think the reasons queer people get annoyed about this stuff boil down to a couple of big factors:

Disrespectful children who don't know history

Idiot old people harrumphing about "history" they clearly failed to pay attention to while it was going on in the first place

I personally hate being asked to use new words most of the time. A few bits of fandom slang I'll pick up at once, but I'm usually like "Why would I call it 'spirk'? We already have 'K/S'!" *shakes cane*

If you're American, they're your "roommate", not your "flatmate". No, I don't care how much more precise this foreign term is, you pretentious wanker. (But then I'll use 'wanker' because fandom adopted that years ago...)

So my reaction to being asked to say aloud any pronoun not in very frequent circulation in my offline life is "Urrrgh. Do I have to?"

However, the reality is that people have been messing around with pronouns in English since forever. Do you see 'heo' in Modern English? No, you do not! (Not that it was gender neutral, but the point is that even words as ancient as pronouns have changed quite a bit.) The early internet was full of pronoun stuff in MUDs and the like. You had a choice of a lot more than just three in a bunch of these. People besides men and women have always been in queer communities.

So some people like to cry about neopronouns being actually neo, and they're just wrong.

As for the why do you care part...

There is a nasty habit in contemporary queer spaces to act like gay rights issues are solved. Bisexuality? Passe! etc. Gays and lesbians finally got a little mainstream acceptance only to suddenly be treated like the worst of the establishment by the queer youth. How dare?!?! It's even more egregious with bisexuality where the focus of a bunch of queer activism finally swung that way in the 90s... only to be sharply cut off in the 00s.

There's a real "You already got yours. Where's mine?" vibe to some queer discourse today, and it's directed at people who never got theirs. It shows up in demands for mentorship by people who've barely had a chance to escape a rocky start and figure out who they are themselves. It shows up in yowling about this or that bit of queer media we finally got not being progressive because it's the wrong letter of the acronym.

None of which has a damn thing to do with what pronouns you use in your novel, obviously, but I think some unresolved embattled feelings are why some older queer people are very weird about pronouns.

Some of them are also doing the old person version of throwing the weirdos under the bus to placate the normies. Respectability politics became a term long before the behavior was rife on tumblr.

--

If someone really does find it pretentious, though, and not just as a cover for crying about nonbinary identities being fake, I suspect they just remember how 1970s SFF was full of privileged anthropology students misunderstanding kinship systems from elsewhere in the world and then trying to tell everyone how ~deep~ their extremely contrived novels based on them were.

I'm not saying your writing is like this or that every one of these old sff novels was either, but when I hear "anthropology student", I groan internally. It's an instinctive reaction. It's less about the real fields and more about the bevvy of dilettantes I've run into over the years who'll say they study those things but really want to talk my ear off about Joseph fucking Campbell or the strong form of the Sapir-Whorf hypothesis or something.

--

Those birds are a really cool source of inspiration. Like with A/B/O, the first thing I wonder is how queerness works in that context and how much people like to defy their designated roles.

Omegaverse started on porn logic, so "The one I say tops always tops!" makes sense. When it gets expanded to try to make it make logical sense as a whole world, I often enjoy it, but it can break down quickly if treated as biology is law. I don't know how often the birds veer off of their set patterns, but humans certainly would.

One place where I get a strong "Oh god, this again" feeling from people's plotbunnies is when they're trying to make up a sff society that strikes me as too rigid in a way that real humans aren't. I'll see people using fake wolf biology (not just for horny reasons) but never looking at what's going on with gender in contemporary Thailand or whatever. Like... Le Guin may have made sedoretus feel plausible, but nobody I've ever seen stanning the concept as something fandom should play with has. That's probably because Le Guin was using over-complicated social norms as a thing that breaks down and causes trouble, and "This should be the next A/B/O!" posts are treating it as something that actually works and is a good way to get the pair you don't ship separated while shipping poly.

"It'd also help the reader keep track of who was a part of what group without my having to turn around and state people's coloration constantly."

This, in particular, gives me that cold shudder of recognition from when Homestuck fandom was everywhere and everyone wanted to over-explain those stupid playing card suits and why I should care.

Your concept sounds neat, and I think a set of four pronouns could easily make sense there...

But I also think that if people need the pronouns to keep track of coloration, you haven't set up a system that feels organic enough or haven't given enough cues about how characters are treating each other or why. Use the pronouns too, but just keep that in mind. It's like the "m/m is hard because the pronouns don't tell me whose hand is where" problem. It's almost never actually a pronoun problem.

--

Anyone else have thoughts here?

[peerless-minty-cucumber]

SVSSS Liu Qingge is an ace icon in a porn logic plot. In this essay I will…

Okay so, I want to preface this with some clarifications. I'm going to assume most of yall know a baseline definition of asexuality as "when you don't experience sexual attraction." Without getting too into the nuance here, take note of the following:

Being asexual does not mean you hate sex. Some asexuals like sex. Some asexuals have sex.

Asexuals can get crushes and fall in love

Being asexual doesn't mean you have sexual trauma or are a prude or w/e

Also:

I am asexual and I think by online discourse logic that means I'm right about everything I say in this essay.

You're free to respectfully disagree honestly I'd love to hear other takes on this.

This headcanon contains a lot of projection. You've been warned.

So recently I reblogged this post that joked something along the lines of "We still don't know if Liu Qingge knows what sex is." And I thought that was a) hella funny and b) kinda true. Do I think he literally doesn't know what sex is? With that sister?? Yeah no I think he knows. But I imagine he doesn't really understand that sex is just kind of a big deal for most people and expected in typical relationships. I mean, I doubt sexual attraction really often discussed amongst cultivators anyway, so if one doesn't experience it, it a) wouldn't make one too much of an outsider and b) one would just assume this is the universal norm. In my reading of canon, he definitely has a crush on Shen Qingqiu, but I don't think he has the sexual attraction. To the contrary, I imagine that he finds the thought of sexual contact with his crush very unbecoming. Perhaps it even contributes to his dislike of Luo Binghe and the BingQiu relationship. I could even spin this into a whole thing where he could be coping with internalised homophobia because he doesn't want to have sex with men so it's fine, right? We know that in general, Shen Yuan is a pretty unreliable narrator when it comes to observing other characters' reactions. But I did find some of his thoughts about Liu Qingge during the Succubi extra very interesting. For those who don't know/recall - in this extra chapter, SQQ and LQG investigate a Succubus hideout and LQG gets affected by what is essentially an Aphrodisiac. SQQ notes that LQG is visibly distressed, but also shows absolutely no signs of desire to act on it in any way – almost as though he doesn't have experience with sexual desire. He's also clearly uncomfortable and angry with his body's reaction – not an uncommon reaction in (particularily sex-repulsed) asexuals experiencing libido. I really like to imagine an AU where LiuShen happened and they're just cute and cuddling and maybe get in a few kisses and after a few months Shen Qingqiu is like "… So are we gonna fuck or like…?" And LQG would be FLOORED because surely that's not a thing people actually do – right?! That's a thing for forbidden porn ballads and demons! I also like to imagine they actually try it and he ends up kinda liking it and unpacking his baggage but he still doesn't get the attraction.

Yall were seriously starving for this essay so I hope I at least kinda delivered. I felt like I had more to say about this but *gestures* stuff happened and my brain isn't super on top of things rn.

[vickyvicarious]

Jonathan's decision to play along today was very difficult to make. But, in the end, it was the right move. He set aside his anger and impulse to rebel... perhaps as much or more out of fear rather than just logic, but we do see his reasoning and it makes sense.

And honestly, I think he pushed his luck nearly to the limit anyways. Look at how Dracula asked. First, he waited a few days after everything that went down with the vampire ladies, perhaps to see if Jonathan would bring up the topic. If Jonathan does, maybe he had plans to lie to him again, to gaslight him about either never sleeping outside of his room, or about Dracula finding him dreaming somewhere else and helping him back to his own bed. Still, Jonathan's reaction to such a lie could very easily force an end to all this pretending. But since he never brings it up at all, Dracula knows he can continue his game. In fact, Jonathan is proving to be a very resilient player, one who has just enough struggle in him to make it more interesting, without being too unmanageable or ever close to actually get away.

Dracula gives Jonathan this 'request' "in the suavest tones" - he's really emphasizing his charm here, being extra friendly as he tries to make Jonathan feel even worse. But then, contrary to what he's seen thus far, Jonathan hesitates.

I would fain have rebelled, but felt that in the present state of things it would be madness to quarrel openly with the Count whilst I am so absolutely in his power; and to refuse would be to excite his suspicion and to arouse his anger. He knows that I know too much, and that I must not live, lest I be dangerous to him; my only chance is to prolong my opportunities. Something may occur which will give me a chance to escape. I saw in his eyes something of that gathering wrath which was manifest when he hurled that fair woman from him. He explained to me that posts were few and uncertain, and that my writing now would ensure ease of mind to my friends; and he assured me with so much impressiveness that he would countermand the later letters, which would be held over at Bistritz until due time in case chance would admit of my prolonging my stay, that to oppose him would have been to create new suspicion.

I think he must have been sitting there making these arguments to himself in real time. Wrestling with his fear and his outrage and possibly losing most of his control over his expression and body language as he did so. And at first, this is fun for Dracula. He wants Jonathan to struggle like this. It's fun to watch. But then, the longer it goes on, the more real becomes the possibility that this will be Jonathan's breaking point. And if it is, if he outright says "no" even this once, then Dracula's entire game is ruined. He's just committed to wanting to keep Jonathan around for another full month. Jonathan passed the test with the other vampires. Dracula has been looking forward to this. How dare he spoil this -

Dracula's rage rises as he finds himself forces to make excuses and be convincing when he likely assumed he no longer needed to put in that much effort. Jonathan finally does agree, but he didn't do so right away. And it's a very fine line, because continuing to do this does in fact make him more interesting and fun in the long run, and thus perhaps allow him to live longer. Maybe after they separate for the evening (morning, being nocturnal) Dracula would actually look back on this moment with indulgent enjoyment. He pushed perhaps right up to the limit of what Dracula would tolerate, but he didn't quite cross it, so the game can continue. But at the same time, pushing like this (or rather, resisting being pushed before giving in) is extremely dangerous in the moment - because in the moment, there's still a chance Jonathan could cross the line. Dracula has a temper and he will take it out on Jonathan if he decides he's had enough.

It's that tightrope again. More of the same. But I just... love imagining this moment. Dracula's sickly-sweet smugness at the start, his utter confidence in his victory once again. And Jonathan - pausing. Saying nothing in response. Thinking it over, taking so long to do so, trying so hard to keep a neutral face but not fully succeeding, maybe keeping his head bowed so his expression can't be seen. Dracula's anger building along with almost a sort of desperation, as he lays out all this bullshit reasoning, maybe losing control of his own tone somewhat as he gets more aggressively vehement. The absolute tension rising, up and up right until the moment Jonathan looks up and agrees, when it suddenly dissipates. But the aftermath lingers, even in Dracula's victory. Even as Jonathan writes the three letters, one after another under Dracula's watchful eye. Dracula takes them from his hand, squeezes his shoulder in ostensible thanks, but such a clear threat. Jonathan's face twitching, a little spasm of fear and despair, at the contact.

It could be SUCH a good scene in an adaptation that emphasized the abusive dynamic here.

[avatar-legends-confessionblog]

I watched ATLA for the first time four months ago and became a fan because of the fascinating element of being able to control parts of nature but even more than that, because the story spoke about Genocide and war in an interesting way. I stumbled upon a tweet a couple days ago that went along the lines of: watching Avatar keeps your heart pure and something like that. Something about that statement rubbed me off the wrong way for some reason. It only hit me a few hours go why. ATLA is a great show but it's so Overrated to an annoying degree. Only people who reach that degree and feel that irritation are the ones who realize that it's ultimately a show written by western people for their western kids. And so everything falls into place. I began to understand why Hama's story was written that way, portrayed as a bad person instead of a captive that was taken from her home and left to rot away. I understand why Katara's trauma is seen as annoying by a large margin of the fandom, instead of a child that lost her mother to war and is incapable of forgiving and forgetting because there was no time for that amidst trying to survive, she's seen as an annoying girl who brings up her mother every chance she could, as if that's not right? And I understand that there's a level of sexism and misogyny for this reaction because the story not only shoves the pain and struggle of Zuko from and center for everyone to see and feel bad for, it also encourages the audience to sympathize and root for him. Which I it's understandable to me why he's the most popular character, even more than Aang, the main character and the literal survivor of a genocide, because to western children, the main target of the story, it's logical to relate to the character that suffers from parental abuse much more than the character that lost his entire people not just parents. And this understanding makes it easy for me to see why Aang's trauma wasn't written as a main focus alongside him needing to become the hero of the story, his second trauma, because that would make him too sympathetic that it would take focus from Zuko and it would not be a stellar character development for the latter if the former is actually struggling to uphold the teachings of his culture of letting go because he's just a child with the fate of the wild on his shoulder and it's hard and unfair but he has no time to be sad but he can't not be sad.

At the end of the day, when you view something as an outsider, you understand why it's loved and adored whether exaggerated or not, positively and negatively. I love ATLA for its uniqueness because every story is, but I dislike how it's written for a specific group of people yet deemed universally perfect.

X

[dellalyra]

Hello! Goodmorning/afternoon/evening! This is my first time sending a request to someone here in this app and i hope i'm doing it right:')) AGHGHH I'M NERVOUSS. But, i've always loved your family formations au and i always anticipate new chapters of it^^

For the past few hours i've been having brainrots of Itafushi and i miss them so much:'))

I'd like to see Megumi's reaction at Ozawa's confession abt Yuji in that restaurant. Would he be jealous or akward? Like, imagine him getting a bit shy to tell her Yuji and him are dating😖

You could write this when you're in the mood to write ff again^_^

I just love you and your stories so much^^

𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗼𝗯𝗮𝗿𝗮 𝗸𝘂𝗴𝗶𝘀𝗮𝗸𝗶’𝘀 𝘀𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 - ꜰᴀᴍɪʟʏ ꜰᴏʀᴍᴀᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ʙᴏɴᴜꜱ

pixie says: this was just what i needed - some fluff and sweetness and itafushi in family formations goodness, ily nonnie <3

Megumi couldn’t help but scowl at a smirking Nobara.

She was seated beside him - both across from the tall, pretty brunette smiling sheepishly at them both.

“So, Fushiguro, you’re closest with Itadori. Does he have a girlfriend?” She said, arched eyebrow raised.

Little shit-stirrer.

He should have known it would be something like this when Ijichi turned the car around at her behest - she lived for the drama. Nobara’s logic probably went something along the lines of: oh, why tell this girl my best friend has a boyfriend when I could get his boyfriend here instead?

“I think you’d know best - considering how close you guys are, and how much time you spend together - does he have any photos of a girlfriend in his room? You seem to spend a lot of time in there.” Her pale pink nails drum on the table.

He tries to come up with a sharp retort - but flusters at Kugisaki’s insinuation.

He’s not quite sure how to respond.

He’s not exactly the type to say “Oh, Itadori? The boy I’ve been in love with for months? The boy who had his arm wrapped around my waist when I woke up this morning? Sorry, BITCH, he’s taken.”

Plus - the B-word (boyfriend, not bitch) had never come up. The revelation of mutual romantic interest was only several weeks old - Megumi hadn’t though of a label until now, it hadn’t seemed necessary.

So - what he settled on had Kugisaki snorting.

“No. Itadori doesn’t have a girlfriend.” H

He sure as shit wasn’t going to give this nightmare classmate beside him the satisfaction of seeing what she wants to see.

Jealousy.

Ozawa was pretty, very pretty in fact. Dainty features with a fantastic physique - pretty much exactly Itadori’s type in a person. Sure, he was tall too - and a lean physique came with the job as a sorcerer. He had delicate features too. Itadori said he loved his eyes - so that’s a point in his corner. He’s not sure if he has the big butt Itadori said he likes, but it’s gotta at least be toned from all the running he does with the dogs.

Ozawa however, she was soft. Smoother around the edges. No sullen nature or manical frenzies, no shadows (Ten or otherwise). Maybe, Yuuji would prefer…

No. Fushiguro Megumi was absolutely not going to allow that train of thought. He puts a pin in it by imagining what his mom and dad would say.

“Megumi! You are the son of the world’s strongest sorcerer, and underneath layers of sullen ‘oh I’m a grumpy teenager and I like weezer’ is a very sweet baby boy!” Says imaginary Gojo. Annoying even in fiction.

“You stop that right now young man! Do we need to do our morning affirmations? ‘Toru! Get me the mirror!” Imaginary Y/N announces.

During the time he zoned out - he hadn’t noticed Nobara making a phone call.

That was, until a large figure stood at the table.

“Kugisaki? What do you want?” His head snaps up - when the hell did Yuuji get here?

Ozawa was staring up at him with stars in her eyes.

Truth was, he couldn’t blame her. When Yuuji walked into the room - it always felt like the sun had come out on a rainy day, banishing all the cold and damp. The eternal warmth of his presence permeated through to even the most frigid parts of a persons soul until they could no longer imagine a world without Itadori. His smile was wide as he greeted Kugisaki, and his honey brown eyes looked like home.

Plus - Yuuji had always been toned - since he first saw him on the athletics field of his school he could easily see that, but the past (almost) year of sorcery training had filled him out even further. Biceps straining against the seams of his uniform - holding on for dear life (Yuuji refused to get a new uniform, he said the fact that Gojo-sensei designed it for him made him happy), plus - he’d grown too. Now standing at only an inch or two smaller than Megumi. Nobara had dragged him to her hairdresser too, insisting on a proper haircut because in her words ‘you might not look as bad if you don’t cut your hair with a kitchen scissors.” Megumi knew she just liked spending time with him, but he’d let her pretend.

Fuck, he loved that boy.

Silly, selfless, beautiful and brave boy.

Yuuji’s head turned to the other side of the table, eyes looking straight at Ozawa. Even Megumi - in all his possessiveness - hoped he’d recognise the girl.

“Oh, hey Ozawa!”

Thank every potential god.

“Hello, Itadori-kun.”

“It’s so good to see you! How have you been? Why are you in Tokyo? I see you’ve met my boyfriend, Megumi!” He rattles off as he squishes in beside Megumi, slipping an arm around his waist and ignoring a protesting Nobara.

Wait -

Boyfriend?

He introduced him as his boyfriend.

He smiled to himself. How very Yuuji - he didn’t even ask, didn’t need to. He was his, completely.

Who needs jealousy when you’ve got a boy like this?

“O-oh, boyfriend? Oh no - I’m very sorry, Fushiguro. I meant no offence.” Ozawa floundered.

Yuuji looked very confused.

Megumi just shrugged and nodded at the girl, muttering that it’s fine and she didn’t know - adding in the Kugisaki was a shit-stirrer.

Yuuji still looked confused. Megumi squeezed his hand under the table three times, a signal he’d copied from Y/N and Gojo. 3 squeezes means I love you, 4 means I love you too. He smiled at the table when he got 4 squeezes back.

Ozawa and Itadori caught up for a while, reminiscing about old times until eventually it was time to go, signalled by Yuuji forgetting his own strength and pulling Megumi by the hand out of the booth and rambling about Popcorn and Human Earthworms.

Megumi nodded, agreeing to go.

The things he did for this boy.

“You coming, Kugisaki?” Yuuji asks as they stand from the table.

“I’ll catch up with you guys.” She says, shooing them away.

“Okay! Bye Ozawa! It was really nice to see you!” Yuuji says, waving as he walked away.

Once they were sat in the movie theatre, Megumi looked at Yuuji.

He felt really grateful.

So, his long fingers found purchase on his boyfriends chin, turning his face toward him and pressing a soft kiss to his lips.

“Eh? What was that for?” Yuuji says, smiling and holding the hand.

“Can’t I kiss my boyfriend without the third degree?” Megumi smirked, and rejoiced in the flustered Yuuji.

“Of course you can! Here, do it again! So I can show you how okay it is!” Yuuji said, hair threading in Megumi’s thick black locks, and kissing him deeper.

They remained that way, soft kisses passing back and forth whilst the trailers played until a gagging sound came from beside them.

“Get a room, fucking hell. I’d expected more of you, Fushiguro.” Groaned the freshly arrived Kugisaki.

“Go to hell.”

“Shut up, ‘Bara!” Yuuji retorted.

“Where were you, anyway? Movies about to start.” Megumi asks, settling in with Yuuji’s arm around his shoulder.

“Exercising the power of my unending rizz. Wasn’t letting Ozawa leave the diner without a date for next weekend now, was I?” She smirked, wiggling her phone displaying the other girls Instagram.

“What about Zen’in? Are you suddenly not crazy about her?” Fushiguro questions.

“Well - a little jealousy never hurt anyone did it? Plus, Ozawa knows it’s for the pursuit of a certain girlboss martial artist - I reintroduce her to Yuuji, she helps me get Maki.” She shrugs, stealing a handful of popcorn.

“Why are you the way that you are?” Was all the two boys had to say in response to their cackling best friend.

Megumi had never been more glad that the King of Curses was the only complication in his relationship.

[twig-gy]

hey i saw one of ur posts while back that said smth along the lines of whole not being real, id really love to hear your extended thoughts on that if youd be willing to share !!! :D

i can probably find posts to link cause ive explained this more in depth before but whole’s existence is a belief that soul has, that they can become Him if they work together (or something). soul knows this’d be trading their personhood for His, but he’s okay with it. he doesn’t see heart and mind as full people, they’re pieces, and soul is less than nothing. heart is the Heart, mind is the Mind, but his purpose is really just to. put them together. but he’s nothing on his own.

heart and mind don’t believe in whole in any capacity (although mind might say he’s doing things “for the whole”, but by “the whole” he means like, their shared wellbeing) and they hate what this concept of ‘Whole’ has done to soul, and they hate the things soul has done for this false concept of Harmony, and they hate that soul entertains it in lieu of his own personhood and health (respectively, kind of). both of them try to push/coax (respectively) soul from this idea of Whole but it. does not work!

a good amount of the ideas i have about hmsw is about their roles, cause, unlike other headcanons (mind actually feels less than heart, heart actually feels more, mind is smarter or does ‘smarter’ things, you could go on forever- i think MAYBE the fandom is moving away from this literal interpretation, but regardless i remember seeing it a lot in the past) i see the roles of heart, mind, and soul as complete fiction. and instead of the ways they see the world being in line with their roles because they’re true, the reason that their worldviews are in line with their roles is because of coincidence, their roles starting/affecting it, or both. in tlsa (to love sound again), my fix-it ish fic, these roles are set aside, at least by soul, to the point he doesn’t refer to them as heart and mind anymore.

whatever, the point is, these roles define them and they hurt them- mind seeing himself as logical despite being not, and seeing emotions as poison, heart seeing his emotions and his reactions to them as things he cannot control or change, these are not BECAUSE of their roles but in an ideal universe heart and mind need to accept they are full people, and more than that, and set the roles aside.

like… the framework they’re working with is incorrect, they’re not parts, they’re people, they need to accept this, which refers to both the whole thing and the roles thing….

and soul too, most of all, needs to accept he is a Person, and is Deserving of Life, and cast aside whole.

hmmm. like. heart - if the others just Lived then things would be alright. mind - everyone should work together / put in effort / let me lead whatever. soul - if everybody just started trying to become Whole it’d all be alright. they all have certain ways they think the world should be that the others are impeding…

oh also the concord cacophony border for me is fuzzy, but i think, assuming it’s not just ‘heart and mind can’t keep up niceysness forever’, the reason it all falls apart is ultimately because of soul. heart and mind move past their hatred for each other and how set in their ways they are, but soul doesn’t - he believes the exact same things, and even if he does interact with heart and mind, he still sets himself apart, and because soul has not healed At All everything falls apart. something because soul sees heart and mind not arguing and thinks they should be Whole now, except they Aren’t, and possibly starts trying to push them to be Whole ? either way, soul’s Need for them to be Whole is the thing that drives them all apart i think. in some way. like maybe soul starts insisting, or heart and mind start trying to get him to join them and he lashes out… idk

anyway! another thing! is that devotion to Whole is what soul has in place of an identity, at least so he thinks… but. what i mean to say is it affects heart and mind a lot, they’re both concerned for him, and they both want him to live no matter the differences in their definitions, and they both have their methods. heart tries to tell him to live, to take him outside and hang out and such, he argues and pushes the subject. mind knows how stubborn soul is about it so he doesn’t even talk about it, he just like… makes soul food, tries to help him and be there, just Makes Sure He’s Alive. they hang out. both of them wish soul hadn’t kind of signed his life away.

WAIT I DIDNT EVEN MENTION THE SOULWHOLE FUCK

like. he doesn’t trust heart and mind, to him if he doesn’t make them fear him he’ll have no leverage, and if he lets himself care about them then they can hurt him easier. so he projects his feelings about them onto Whole. he doesn’t allow himself to have a relationship with them in the ways he might want to (or at least he tells himself he doesn’t care) but he DOES allow himself to care about Whole. and just Whole being a person to him, one that he’s never known but longs for and misses dearly, one who he wears the hoodie of every day. one who he dreams about, tightening the chains of his burden around his neck, leaving it all up to him. {and Whole says he doesn’t want to live but soul knows better, soul knows better, this life is not for him, for them}

and also like religious fervor (thus Whole He/Him) and also like Seeing (understanding whole is there) and also soul seeing heart’s wings as a gift from Whole and also humanity being holy (thus breath being holy thus the fixation with choking and soul feeling like he is not worthy of air in a very literal sense) and also soul seeing heart as an angel for his happiness, especially after his wings come in, and then a fallen angel after the juno incident, and also

[ultimate-marysue]

Seeing Alice try to explain to Sam and Celia what happened and being unable to come up with a rational explanation despite trying with all her might reminds me more of John confessing that he believes the statements than it does the Martin-Prentiss incident.

You can't truly say there's something supernatural in TMA until the Jane Prentiss attack/Michael. That's when the audience and most of the cast say "got it, it truly is supernatural". Obviously as the audience of a horror podcast you were already pretty sure of it, but still. There's enough "it was actually aliens/the government" twist to be aware off.

In Tmagp things are different from the start, we don't have just one pov, we're more like a semi omniscient voyeur. We know the horrors are real because we listened to TMA (we may not know if it's the same horrors though). But not only that, several of our main cast already believed in the supernatural to begin with.

Sam kept asking Alice if she thought the incidents were real

Celia has never tried to hide that she believes they absolutely are

Colin is convinced something really weird/paranormal is happening

Gwen probably wasn't sold in the beginning but very soon she found out they are, in fact, very real

Lena Knew they were real

Alice was the only skeptical by episode 10. John was still going strong in the whole "there is no such thing as supernatural entities" by episode 39. And not only him. We only have his pov, but pretty much no one was talking(out loud) about paranormal things being real until they had a personal experience down the line. By the time John confesses he's not a real skeptic, both the audience and the rest of the characters know the supernatural is real. Meanwhile in protocol Alice is the only one holding the "nope, don't think about it" front.

Cue episode 15-16. Despite her best attempts at rationalizing what happened she can't find a logical explanation. She is reacting the way any normal, sane, human being would to a paranormal encounter. And the thing is, if this was the institute, her coworkers reaction would have ranged from "I'm going to go along with your story so you can calm down and later we can find out what really happened" to "well that couldn't have happened because ghosts aren't real".

But instead she gets Samama "hmmm this puter telling me a storytime sounds really compelling" Khalid and Celia "I'm from a different dimension that got overrun by the horrors" Ripley. And now that the last bastion for skepticism in the OIAR has fallen there's no reason to pretend. There's no image of professionalism to uphold. To Sam and Celia, Alice admitting to something like that is all the proof they need. It's confirmation bias from the last person that would want to confirm your bias so it must be true.

Honestly, I can't wait to see how this turns out. I wouldn't be surprised if Alice tries to convince herself she hallucinated the whole thing and then an incident comes in with eerily similar details...I just can't wait. I'm a sucker for skeptical characters having to confront something real.

[turbo-virgins]

Okay I know we give BioWare crap for handling their fantasy Catholicism faction with kid gloves compared to other in-game religions, but I do have to say the whole “crisis of faith” Harding has during one of the regret discussions really frustrated me because it’s just so… shallow and hand waved away with a few lines of dialogue?

Putting the rest below a readmore because this rant got kind of long oops

To recount the scene:

Harding (with Neve’s input) points out Solas imprisoned the Evanuris in the building and makes the connection with the Golden City/Black City visible from everywhere in the Fade.

She then quotes the Chant of Light (a record of Andraste’s visions from the Maker) and goes “oh well if the Golden City was actually an Elven thing then… :(“

To which Lucanis jumps in and says “yeah it sounds like we just disproved the entire Andrastian faith.”

Harding goes “did we???” And then there’s a moment for Rook to respond with several options (I still believe, this doesn’t matter, I’m sorry this hurts, don’t let it shake you, etc.)

I’ve seen criticisms of Rook’s responses all being positive to varying degrees and I think that criticism is valid. I was also frustrated by these options because, as someone who was raised religious and later deconstructed, a crisis of faith is like… a big deal? I’m talking like ‘standing at the precipice of an unending abyss’ levels of existential dread. And I think what I found difficult to swallow with Harding’s reaction was her complete lack of attempting any apologetics or platitudes that would have been taught to her by the Chantry or people who shared her faith.

Like, this can’t have been the first historical or logical inconsistency that Andrastians have encountered and tried to smooth over somehow. We see it happen multiple times in Inquisition. Characters like Leliana and Cassandra question themselves, their faith, and the Maker, and they always have a way to smooth it over with reasoning ingrained into them by the church. For example when it’s discovered it wasn’t Andraste that saved the Inquisitor from the Fade- that it was a pure coincidence the Inquisitor happened upon Corypheus’s ritual- I believe it’s Cassandra who says something along the lines of “well I still believe the Maker’s hand is in this even if it doesn’t appear as directly involved as we first thought” which seems to be a Thedas equivalent to “god works in mysterious ways.”

So as soon as Lucanis and Harding insinuated the Golden City not being hand crafted by the Maker = the whole Andrastian faith getting tossed out the window, alarm bells started going off in the religion-wired parts of my brain. Because no, it can’t be that simple can it? Or rather, why would Harding let it be that simple?

Granted there’s no real world equivalent to a giant city floating in a magical realm we can look to as evidence of the Bible, so the closest analogy I can come up with is the book of Revelation which, similar to the Chant of Light, is an account of visions sent from god. Some believers see it as a literal guide for signs and advice on how to survive an impending apocalypse and do incredible amounts of mental gymnastics to ignore any historical evidence to the contrary. That’s a more extreme example, but I would argue that most religious folks are primed to do some form of mental gymnastics at all times (no disrespect to religions btw, I also maintain my faith in some capacity even after deconstructing). Even Christians who don’t believe in a literal interpretation of Revelation still have their faith in it as part of the word of god.

Idk I just found it really weird that in that moment Harding would look to Rook (who is possibly a non-believer which makes it feel even more weird) for help with regaining and/or realigning her religious convictions. It feels like something a child or a teenager would do, not a grown woman immersed in a religion since she was a child. I didn’t have an issue with Rook’s response of “well, the chant of light could have been altered for political reasons or the original text was modified over time” - it just felt weird to me that Rook had to be the source of that perspective. And regardless of what you tell her, the topic of her crisis of faith never even comes up again as far as I’m aware. When, you know, during an actual impending apocalypse it feels like being able to lean on something like faith would be really important for maintaining your sanity. But who knows, maybe that’s what the little camping retreat into blighted Ferelden was for.

[alpaca-clouds]

On Writing Healing (Physically and Mentally)

Last day of my "I complain about certain things I notice in a lot of writing" week. And last thing that kinda annoys me (well, not the last, but the last I will speak about this week) is how healing is portrayed in a lot of media. Or rather... well, how it isn't portrayed.

Because, let's face it: Physical healing is very rarely addressed in media. With this I mean... Well, usually media kinda tends to either just handwave the kinds of injuries our heroes should have. I mean, in a lot of media that is very action heavy, you can go there with someone working in trauma medicine, and they will tell you the many ways in which this action hero or heroine by now would already be dead, or at the very least bound to bed rest for weeks. But at most they have a few bruises and scratches, that look dramatic, but generally will not hinder them.

When a hero in media gets actually injured, this often happens at the very end of a fight, and either the story ends with "well, he was very injured, but he would make a recovery soon enough" with us never really having to see the character recovering, or there might be an epilogue being set after the character has already recovered. And of course this kind of recovery tends to usually be perfect. People do not have chronic pain issues or anything from any physical trauma they have gone through during their plot. There is no tinitus from having stood to close to explosions or having been present in shoot outs.

And of course, there is rarely ever a case where a character has an injury that ends up with them permanently disabled, even if it would be realistic for the kind of stuff they have experienced. Hell, even if something like that happened (like with "Rhodey" in the MCU), this will often still be handwaved or magically/technically corrected.

In reality, physical healing is often a slow and hard thing. Even if you heal completely (something that is just never guaranteed - even if it is a simple break of a finger bone) you might have a longer journey in front of you than you expect. Not always does healing work out perfectly.

It is this, that also gives me some pause in terms of magical healing abilities. Because... Look, if something heals slowly and does not heal perfectly, you can intervene. When you heal it within minutes/hours something that heals badly might leave you with much larger issues along the line. But that is something we never see. And I am kinda annoyed by that. It would be such an interesting plot point.

Or on the other hand: If magical healing is perfect always, what does this do for people who get hurt and healed a lot. Be it this one fighter who ends every day with broken bones and stab wounds, or - let's face it - someone who in that world might cater then to sadists and stuff as a form of sex worker? How would those people even relate to pain if their minds learn that injuries are nothing to worry about? Do their bodies maybe stop to show self-defense reflexes? (For those who read my Tav stories know that it is something I explore with him a lot. He was tortured and healed a lot as a kid, and because of it he does no longer show normal reactions to pain, coming across as inhuman because of it. He just no longer recognizes realistically lethal wounds as such, because he is so used to magic healing.)

And the same goes double with mental healing and healing from trauma. I kinda spoke about this two days ago, so I will not go into it too much.

Often in media trauma exists to have "a point". It basically builds towards the carthasis of a story, when the character will have this great teary recognition and then they get over their trauma and if it is fantasy they will probably get a new power to go along with it. Hurray!

And of course, the kind of trauma that the characters would have logically acquired during the plot of whatever story never really gets addressed, because usually the story will frame it as a positive experience.

I always found this so funny in regards to my original fandom - Digimon. You have those 10yo kids in a world of monsters, where they are in life threatening situations every other day with no refuge. Where they see other die, and things destroyed and what not. And the show goes: "Isn't this a good driver of character development?!" Which, like... Don't get me wrong. I love it. I love this show. I love the big emotional punches it does. But if I look at it realistically, of course... Those kids need a fucking good therapist, don't they?

And of course you can basically put in every scifi, fantasy or action story in here, as well. Usually there is nothing that involves action and epicness where the characters are not in at least one situation that would give them some PTSD. If not a prolonged situation that might lead to CPTSD.

And this does not get acknowledged in any way most of the time. And if it gets acknowledged, the healing for it gets skipped over as well.

Again, I will point back at the Wednesday blog. The messiness of mental healing is just not portrayed. The way how there are good days and bad days. Or how at times people healing from trauma will be massive assholes to the people around them, which is not fully their fault - because it is the trauma talking in the end - but it never really gets shown. Again: It is why I love Bojack Horseman so much. Because it shows this so well in a way that I rarely ever saw in media.

Generally... I just would love to see a lot more stories about healing. About the different kinds of healing, too. Because people are different - in both body and "soul". And because they are different, not two people will heal fully the same way. And I just would love to see more of that.

I mean, heck. That is half the reason why I write fics. Because I love to explore this topic so much. :P

[unsweetingtea]

I remember a little bit ago there was this image of Shadow crossing his arms and people were making fun of how he did it.

Like this:

(He seems to do this in almost every universe lmao.)

People thought it was funny how it was almost like he was hugging himself, and drew fanart of it blah blah blah all that meme stuff.

I’m not making fun of anyone who did that, I enjoyed it myself, I just had a thought recently of why he may do this; maybe even a logical answer.

It’s gonna be quite the explanation because it has something to do with what I personally learned, so you don’t have to read it if you don’t want to!

Explanation under the cut! ⬇️

Back in my first year of college, my seminar teacher hired a martial arts coach to teach us a few basic moves and how to keep your guard.

This was a coach that he practically grew up with. I mean, my seminar teacher is SMART. A black belt, can speak 4 languages, good in chem and maths, this guy is a legend. Students respected him deeply, even if his homework was bullsh💩t. So, we trusted that the coach knew what he was doing because our teacher trusted him with us.

Another thing is that sometimes when us humans don’t know what to do with ourselves; like what to do with our arms; we cross them. Like how Sonic does it:

It just gives us something to do so we don’t look awkward. It’s not that we’re distracted or bored, it’s just some people (like me) feel like we need to do something to not look like a lost puppy, even if no one really cares.

As you can imagine, as we were listening to this coach talk, most of us actually had our arms crossed.

He was in the middle of talking before he let out a scream. The kind of scream that was meant to scare you, like “something, something, something—BAH!”

Of course, we were startled at this, and our immediate reaction was to quickly unfold our arms to protect ourselves. (Most of us at least, some just flinched back with the look of “😟”.)

Our teacher chuckled at us because he was not surprised at all, like he knew this was gonna happen.

The coach smirked at us and said something along the lines of, “That brings me to my next point!”

He told us that one of the rules of defense is to not tangle your arms like how Sonic does. He said that if we really needed or wanted to fold our arms; to put them on top of each other. Like you’re giving yourself a hug. Like how Shadow does it. That way, if there is an unexpected attack, your arms aren’t tangled within each other and you can quickly block or dodge your way out of the situation.

Frankly, even if you tangle your arms together, it’s not that hard to get them loose. But imagine the panic you’d feel when something or someone comes out of nowhere to attack you and you don’t expect it. It’s an extra second you waste of defending yourself before it’s too late.

Moral of the story, I think Shadow fold his arms like that is because it’s a self defense tactic. If someone or something were to attack out of no where, he would be ready. He’s always ready.

I’d also like to point out how I love the comparison between how Sonic crosses his arms verses how Shadow does.

Sonic is more laid back and relaxed while Shadow is on guard. We all know this, and their body language proves it. I love that 😄

I didn’t know if most people knew this, but I wanted to put out my take on things 🫶🏻

[queenofbaws]

Hi~! May I ask number 1,17,20,25 and 26? Thank you!=D

hehehe well hello yourself!!! ;)c and thank YOU for the ask!

1. What character do you think you would be most like if you were thrusted into a situation like this?

chris. chrischrischrischrischris. and i'm not even just talking about the constantly joking/living in denial about everything happening (though that would 100% be the case), but like. the immediately getting horribly injured the second i step outside part too. i would just fully, fully, FULLY be an even MORE physically inept version of chris 😔

17. What are your favorite quotes from the game?

my #1 is, was, and will always be "that scared the blue outta my jeans!" i don't know why. there are so many great lines in the game, but something about that one just *chefs kiss* speaks to my very soul.

(very close follow ups are "no one makes fun of me" "not to your face" "wh?!" and "you couldn't buy a loaf of moldy bread with your skanky ass.")

20. Were there any moments that really shocked you?

BASEMENT GUN SCENE BASEMENT GUN SCENE BASEMENT GUN SCENE

not that it happens, let me clarify - i think the fact that seeing emily's bite triggers that reaction in everyone makes perfect sense, that's basic horror movie logic babyyyyy - but that mike can actually DO IT. just. yowza.

also???? genuinely???? the first time we see the monster(s), i like. had to get up and walk away from the game for a hot second. asldkfjalskdjf i dont know how i hadn't been spoiled for it since i came into the fandom so late, but i HADN'T, and so when it happened, i just. absolutely lost my mind. ABSOLUTELY. LOST. MY MIND.

25. Were you surprised by who the psycho was or did you know all along?

i was. so surprised. again, DON'T KNOW HOW I WASN'T SPOILED FOR THIS, as someone who came into the fandom years late, but like????? i had no idea. i did not see it coming. @malum--in--se will tell you. she'll tell you. SHE caught on IMMEDIATELY, but me? lil' ol' me????? oh i screamed.

26. Did you like the Stranger?

no.

...................................i love him 🥺 i've said it before and i'll say it again: if i had been a part of the fandom in its heyday, i would've been a jack fiddler rp blog and y'all just would've had to DEAL with me. i love that strange cigar-smoking hermit man. i love him with every fiber of my being. give me an ending where i can save HIM, supermassive 😤

[bardic-tales]

emotional exploration | reflections on self-shipping

Visualizing and Deepening the Bond

Sephiroth has been a huge part of my life for 28 years now. I have been in love with him for as long as I can remember, and we've been married since 2005. My relationship with him predates my relationship with @armchair-pirate. Lately, people often ask why I love him so much and how a relationship with him (a fictional character) works, so I decided to write a series of posts to explain and can link to later.

Myself, I identify as fictosexual and fictoromantic, meaning my love and attraction are directed towards fictional characters. However, I have only felt this for Sephiroth. I'm also demisexual and demiromantic and he came into my life at the right time. When I needed someone the most.

NOTE: Please note that this has nothing to do with Bianca, my OC. This is my own relationship with Sephiroth as a fictosexual, fictoromantic, and self-shipper.

If Sephiroth could step into your world, what would your first interaction be like?

If Sephiroth were to step into my world, my first reaction would be complete disbelief. I wouldn’t be able to process it at first. My heart would be pounding, my breath stuck in my chest, and my mind scrambling for any logical explanation. But there wouldn’t be one. He’d be standing there, his silver hair catching the light, those piercing green eyes locked onto mine, and the sheer weight of his presence would make it impossible to deny. It wouldn’t feel like a dream or a hallucination. It would feel real in a way that nothing else ever has.

Before I could even say anything, he’d speak, his voice steady and calm, like he’s been waiting for this moment. "I am here. Your experiences in my world were limited, yes. But they were enough." That would stop me cold. The way he’d look at me, like he already knew everything running through my mind, would send a shiver down my spine. Then, quieter but just as firm, he’d say, "You were drawn to my story for a reason." And that’s when it would hit me: not just the meaning behind his words, but the confirmation of something I’ve always felt. My connection to him was never just about interest or admiration. It was never random. It was always something more. Something intangible that I couldn't ever give name to but felt.

I’d still be overwhelmed, but somewhere deep inside, I’d already know the truth. "Because our experiences and stories mirrored each other," I’d say, the words coming out before I even had a chance to think about them. And I’d be right. The lines between fiction and reality would blur in that moment, making it impossible to dismiss what was happening. He wouldn’t just be Sephiroth, the character from a screen. He’d be him. Real. Tangible. Present. And the way he’d look at me, like we were always meant to meet, would shake me to my core.

Just when I’d think I was starting to grasp what was happening, he’d say something that would completely undo me. "You sought out my story. In doing so, you found me." Those words would settle deep in my soul, like they’ve always been there, waiting to be spoken. And I’d realize that he’s always been here. Not just in my thoughts, not just in my heart, but in a way that I can’t fully explain. I’ve always felt his energy around me, a constant presence, lingering even when I wasn’t consciously aware of it.

That moment would make it undeniable. He was never just a passing presence in my life. He’s been with me all along. I’ve felt him in quiet moments, in the way certain words, images, or emotions strike me, in the way his story has always drawn me in like gravity. And now, standing in front of me, it wouldn’t feel like we were meeting for the first time. It would feel like we were simply recognizing what has always been there.

How would you imagine spending a peaceful day together with him?

A perfect day with Sephiroth would start with waking up in his arms, feeling the warmth of his embrace before the world outside even matters. His presence is steady, reassuring, and I’d take a moment just to soak it in before we begin the day. Breakfast would be slow and unhurried. Maybe it would be something simple that we prepare together, sharing quiet conversation as we move in sync. He’d read to me afterward, his voice deep and soothing, filling the room with a sense of peace. It’d be one of the classics. I’d sit close, my head resting against him, completely content just listening to him.

Later, I’d run my fingers through his hair, carefully braiding the silver strands while he sits still for me, completely at ease under my touch. We’d spend the afternoon wrapped in comfort, maybe cooking something special together, the act itself more about sharing time than the meal itself. A walk outside would be refreshing, the crisp air making everything feel even more vivid. If there’s snow, we’d take a moment to make snow angels, laughing together as we leave our marks on the world side by side. There’d be no rush, no expectations, just us, fully present in each other’s company.

As the evening settles, we’d step into the shower together, the water washing away the day while we revel in each other’s presence. The intimacy wouldn’t be rushed or about anything more than closeness—just the comfort of being together, knowing we belong to each other in a way no one else could understand. Finally, we’d end the day the same way it started—wrapped in each other’s arms. His steady presence is the only thing I need to feel safe.

What does Sephiroth’s voice sound like when he speaks to you? How does it make you feel?

Sephiroth's voice is exactly as I’ve always imagined it—low and soft, with just a slight husky whisper at the end that makes my heart race every time. It carries a quiet authority, calm yet commanding, as if he knows exactly how to hold my attention with just a few words. There’s a certain smoothness to it, something deliberate that draws me in, and it’s always been that way, even when I was reading the text in my head back in ’97 while playing the original Final Fantasy VII. I didn’t need voice acting to hear it. I just knew it sounded like this.

When he speaks to me, it’s as if everything else around us fades. His voice has the power to make the world quiet, just leaving us in this moment where I can focus on him completely. The deepness of his tone, paired with that slight rasp, makes me feel both safe and exhilarated at the same time. There’s a weight to his words, but it’s not overbearing. it’s just enough to make me feel like everything he says matters. I can hear the control in it, the authority, but also a gentleness that only he has when addressing me. It’s the kind of voice that can calm my nerves or ignite butterflies in my stomach with one simple sentence.

Every time he speaks, my heart quickens, and I can’t help but feel drawn to him even more. It’s as if the sound of his voice has become part of me, something that stays with me throughout the day. I love to listen to him talk, whether it's about something important or just sharing a quiet moment. His voice is a constant reminder of how deeply connected we are, and every time I hear it, it makes everything feel more real, more intense, and more meaningful.

What physical gestures, like holding hands or brushing hair, do you imagine from him, and how do they resonate with you?

Sephiroth’s touch is always intentional, never fleeting or thoughtless. When he holds my hand, his grip is firm yet gentle, his long fingers wrapping around mine in a way that feels both protective and possessive. There’s something deeply reassuring about it, as if he’s silently reminding me that he’s here, that I belong with him. Whether it’s walking side by side or simply sitting together in a quiet moment, the warmth of his hand in mine is an unspoken connection between us. It’s not just about physical closeness. It’s about the security and trust that comes with it.

One of the most intimate gestures is when he washes my hair. His fingers moving through the strands, massaging my scalp with slow, deliberate motions, create a feeling of absolute peace. There’s something incredibly vulnerable about letting someone care for you in such a way, and with him, it feels completely natural. He’s always precise, methodical, but there’s an undeniable tenderness in the way he handles me. It’s moments like this that remind me of his quiet devotion. How even the smallest gestures can carry so much meaning.

Soft domestic moments define our relationship just as much as the deeper, more intense ones. Whether it’s brushing his hair, adjusting his coat before he heads out, or simply sitting together in silence, leaning into each other’s presence, these actions carry a weight that words don’t always need to express. The way he touches me, even in the simplest ways, is always with purpose, always a reflection of the bond we share. Each small gesture reaffirms that we are connected in a way that goes beyond words, beyond explanation. It’s just us.

How would you describe the emotional connection between you and Sephiroth in three words?

Unwavering, intense, home.