#so take some screenshots while i figure it out
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well, it's been a year since i found you all...
My dear maggots,
This is a long letter, but I owe it to you, and I hope you read it. One year ago. That's when I made that fateful Good Omens post. I'd joined tumblr a couple of weeks before that, in some part for Drarry, mostly for some kind of community.
You see, the month before, I'd just dropped out of college, not even halfway through the first year. I'd been isolated by nearly all the students, and the administration took their side. Of the few I'd considered friends, only one checked in on me after. My high school friends were busy with their own college lives. It's a long story, and a sad one, but this isn't about that story.
Hopped up on reading too many tumblr screenshots on pinterest, I threw myself into the hellsite, and finally was able to talk to a couple of people. Some of you have run into my I need a friend post. For once, I had some kind of interaction. And then my dash was flooded with Good Omens and so I made a post trying to figure out what the fuck was going on with the gay angel and demon.
I was in freefall. I'd long since passed the edge of the cliff and fallen over, and everything in my life was upended, and everything that I'd valued about myself, I'd lost. I was in freefall, and you caught me.
Delighted by my utter dumbassery, apparently, you crowded around me and offered theories and fanart and posts and lore. You laughed at my stupid jokes and pulled me in to watch the show with you. You read my summaries and named me the Mascot of your fandom. You were all so, so kind.
Which is why I adore the Good Omens fandom, and why I'll never leave, even after what Gaiman did. Because yes, I'd interacted with him before things went down, and sure, he was involved in the journey, but this isn't about him. I didn't even know he existed before this year. This is about you, and me, and the community that we created. He doesn't get to take that away.
And then, even once I'd watched the show, you stayed. You became my family. You adopted me into your fold. You began to talk to each other, too. Some of you made friends, some of you found qpps, some of you fell in love with each other, some of you found family. And you thanked me for it, but I don't think you understand, it was thanks to you. You did this. You found a sad, lonely boy with a weird unhinged sense of humour, and you saved him. If you were saved yourself, well, I am very, very, glad. Because you deserve that. You all do.
Whether you've never interacted with me with words or whether we've had hours long phone calls, whether you found me out a year ago or last week, whether you're part of the good omens fandom or not, it doesn't matter, I want to say thank you. You should know that no matter what else happened, you are so deeply good. And kind. And you helped me.
I'm in art school now. You were with me while I was searching for a college. While I wondered if I should even join one. You were with me the day I did the entrance exam. You were with me on my first day, and every day after that. When I was at the hospital or at home or on holiday. I knew I was never alone. Because I had you.
You never have to be alone again, either. You gave me a family, and I will do everything I can to keep it safe. I love you, so, so much.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
~ Asmi
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I have wanted to write a fanfic about the outfit from the 2nd screenshot, but I was almost pulling my hair out because I couldn't figure out how, for the love of the Outsider, this marvel of style even works.
I think I figured it out with the photomode.
Let's call it a study in a Corvid Cloak.
Perhaps it may come in handy for some people.
To begin with, a few shots of the outfit itself.
Then, I'll try to separate it layer by layer.
First, there seems to be a shirt underneath it all.
Then, comes some kind of cotton tunic or some such.
But it seems to be long only on the front, it doesn't cover anything but the front.
Then the main mystery (at least for me): where does this lace on the back even come from?
It seems to be a part of that broad belt, because you can see here that the lacing ends where the belt ends.
But the more I looked at it, this garment seemed like less of a belt and more of a skirt of some sort, because the layered hem comes from under it and seems sewn to it. I guess the lower garment is actually doned on like a skirt, but instead of a zip like on modern ones, it is fastened by the lace.
And under it Lucanis wears deliciously form-fitting leather pants.
I'm sorry for taking such inappropriate shots of you, Lucanis, it's all... for science.
An observation I had about the boots: the ornate knee pad may come separately from the boots, looks like it's on an individual leather belt.
Aaaaaand, to finish it all with the main attraction - the cloak itself.
It seems to me that everything - the cloak, the cape, the shoulder padding - are sewn onto the vest. Or it seems like a vest at first, but it looks like it's actually an intricate jacket.
I may be wrong in my assumptions, and if so, please do point it out. For the love of all holy, this outfit ensnared me and I want to dissect it layer by layer.
Well, that seems to be all. Thanks for your attention.
As a bonus: a few shots of Lucanis I took while studying him.
Throwing these in the wild, but does anyone know if there are better quality references already of Lucanis' sets and could link them to me?
I took these from ingame screenshots, put them together and tried to make the image size bigger praying the quality doesn't break that badly-
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#tccblr#lindsay souvannarath#been meaning to post the full pages#but this website wont let you download without a subscription#so take some screenshots while i figure it out#info
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And here we are everyone! The final update to the Life Tracker with all the chaos at the end! Apologies for the delay here - most of my timing notes were done by Sunday, and then the graphs were complete by the middle of Tuesday, and now it’s Thursday morning. I have no good excuse this time, but here it is!
Previous posts: Session 7, Session 6, Session 5, Session 4. As usual, below the cut is close ups and data and commentary!
There were 37 deaths I counted this session up to Pearl’s permadeath, and then Impulse died twice more before some off-camera life exchanges occurred (Scott showed the first two, so they’re here with their timings, but then after that no one showed when Impulse gained an hour (so got two more kills), Martyn lost an hour (so died once), and Scott gained half an hour (so got a kill), and as you see something doesn’t add up and given that immediately after they get down to their final life I have elected to ignore it and just adjust the time anyway). Then there are the three consensual lava deaths, and then the three final deaths... so there were 45 on camera deaths this session, plus some extra off camera time shuffling.
I actually missed two deaths from Session 7 as well - I had them in my notes so my number of deaths matched what should be, but I somehow forgot to put them in the excel data, so I put them back this week. They were when Impulse fell and Cleo got the kill credit, as when as the Grian double kill on Bdubs and Cleo. I have also removed the 30 minutes I awarded Bdubs for his wolf killing Scar so that he could permadie at the correct time - though I left the 30 minutes Bdubs got for killing Joel in self-defence as a Yellow, as Cleo’s timer shows that she still had this, so I wanted consistency there.
Close up of Sessions 6-8 together
Close up of Sessions 7-8 together
Here you can see all the permadeaths together! It was far harder to label these lines than when players were alive and in a nice orderly line, so I hope this is fairly clear. And a close up of Session 8 alone:
Crazy how Pearl was briefly the one with most time, and Impulse’s habit of keeping his mouth shut about his time served him well - two hours into the session he had 4.5 hours, while Scott and Martyn were both down to 2 hours (and Grian on 1 and Pearl and Etho on half an hour). Scott wasn’t kidding when he said he stole all of Impulse’s time there.
I also decided to acknowledge Martyn’s /kill at the end there, and made him lose the rest of his time there.
Another interesting thing is the fact that Etho and Pearl’s mutual killing of each other, where they both net lost half an hour, didn’t actually effect their final placements. They were on under half an hour when they died, but if they hadn’t killed each other, they still would have been under an hour, and still would have permadied. Grian was definitely on the most time at his permadeath, and BigB got so damn close to it before being saved. If it had taken Mean Gills + TIES even a minute longer to find them and kill them, BigB would have died then (and Pearl may not have lost as much time as quickly as she did).
I do want to acknowledge that Pearl did gain an hour from permakilling Cleo. Because it was PvP, the half hour got automatically added. However, because Cleo permadied, her death message took up the entire screen and completely hid the message telling Pearl she gained 30 minutes, so Pearl then gave herself another 30 minutes. Which means she may have otherwise died when Etho pushed her, but I’m willing to let it slide - Martyn also gained 30 minutes for an unknown reason back between Session 3 and Session 4 that was never acknowledged or removed. He also never fell below two hours until they agreed to equalise, so it probably didn’t effect anything, but I do want both to be acknowledged here.
I also created the graph for the average time per team again, in two forms.
First: where dead people are included in the average
And the Session 6-8 close up of this
And the Session 7-8 close up
And below is the Session 7-8 close up of the version where dead people are removed from the average
I don’t have much to say here other than I think it’s interesting comparing the two. The first one suppresses how much time Impulse has on account of Skizz and Tango both being dead, but the second one shows it loud and clear.
Now is time for the data screenshots! This session was longer than every session except for the first - they had been averaging around two hours, but this time was an hour and a half. Presumably, this is because at the 2 hour mark, there were still 6 people alive, and three of them had an hour or less to live, and 15 minutes later there were only three but at that point you may as well let it play out.
The first 50 minutes of Session 8:
The next hour and 10 minutes of Session 8:
The final 30 minutes of Session 8:
As usual the red and green boxes indicate deaths and kills. The blue boxes is what I’m using for the “time equalisation” the three of them did off camera. I really tried to work out who would have killed who there but something didn’t work and then I decided it didn’t matter lmao. I did do their three lava deaths separately though because I’m still being anal there.
After doing all that, I finally worked out a better way of zooming in on the graphs, by remembering I can actually force the axes to be smaller, which means more detail can actually be seen. So here those are below.
Life Tracker Session 1-4:
I also finally worked out how to rotate the text boxes because it wasn’t working earlier, and I think it looks so much better there!
Life Tracker Session 5-8:
Here unfortunately the text on the left had to be huge for the spacing to work, but then on the right the text had to be much smaller so I could try to space all the names out at the point of death.
Life Tracker Session 6-8:
I actually made the 6-8 one before the 1-4 or 5-8 ones, so before I worked out the angled text, but I think this still works with just the names at the point of death (the start of the name is at the point of death, unless there’s commas in between and then they’re all at the same point)
Life Tracker Session 7-8:
Lots of little details here! We’re close enough that Tango’s death can separate from Scar and Cleo. You can see vertical lines close together rather than overlapping as well which is nice!
Life Tracker Session 8:
This one I did forget to change the title, but you can tell it’s Session 8 only. Tango, Scar, and Cleo died within two minutes of each other, it’s so tight. And Impulse and Scott were within six seconds of each other, so that was always gonna be impossible to separate.
Team Average Time Session 1-4:
Team Average Time Session 5-8:
Team Average Time Session 6-8:
Team Average Time Session 7-8:
Team Average Time Session 8:
I also have a copy of the above four with the dead people excluded, which I can share if people are curious, but this post is maybe getting a bit long right now, and I think the version where dead people are included is the better one to show - more accurate to team strength.
I also made some other graphs while procrastinating this post (because I was procrastinating making a decision about some of Bdubs’s deaths/kills to make the time work), but I will include those in their own post as this one is absolutely far too long right now.
I definitely had fun making these graphs each week, so I hope you guys enjoyed too!!
#limited life smp#limlife#24lsmp#i never ended up figuring out the interactive graphs so you can hide individuals#i saw someone suggest to just make a new graph with just the people I wanted#and while that would work... making each graph takes a while bc I also want to add the green yellow and red lines and also each episode mark#and then i have to colour each line individually the colour i want#and like. its possible#but i just wanted the one graph where i could click some things to ignore or include a series#like for the two versions of the average time graph instead of making two graphs i just changed the formula in the data each time#like most of the time its =AVERAGE(all people in the team) but when i make the screenshots for dead people excluded i manually go in and#and delete the dead people and then reverse it back after#bc thats faster than having two graphs to fix#anyway the other graphs and data i made while procrastinating was like. how much time each person spent on each colour#including when they jumped between colours#only one person spent the full eight hours on one of the colours#everyone else had each colour cut short#and that one person had the other two colours cut short#it was fascinating to actually see the eight hours there#being vague bc i do wanna save that reveal for when i make a post sharing those numbers and graphs#but not rn i need to have a shower and stuff first#this post really should have been out like two whole days ago at the latest#i procrastinated on sunday *making* the graph (i had the data) but on tuesday i had made the graphs and then didnt make the post#its thursday now so#it was actually like 7am when i started the post but then tumblr was being so slow so i had to save the draft and pause for an hour or so#so that tumblr didnt eat the post#but its cooperating now#anyway now im rambling in the tags which means im procrastinating hitting post AGAIN#pls enjoy the graphs and data and numbers :D#my spreadsheets
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seriously, though. i work in higher education, and part of my job is students sending me transcripts. you'd think the ones who have the least idea how to actually do that would be the older ones, and while sure, they definitely struggle with it, i see it most with the younger students. the teens to early 20s crowd.
very, astonishingly often, they don't know how to work with .pdf documents. i get garbage phone screenshots, sometimes inserted into an excel or word file for who knows what reason, but most often it's just a raw .jpg or other image file.
they definitely either don't know how to use a scanner, don't have access to one, or don't even know where they might go for that (staples and other office supply stores sometimes still have these services, but public libraries always have your back, kids.) so when they have a paper transcript and need to send me a copy electronically, it's just terrible photos at bad angles full of thumbs and text-obscuring shadows.
mind bogglingly frequently, i get cell phone photos of computer screens. they don't know how to take a screenshot on a computer. they don't know the function of the Print Screen button on the keyboard. they don't know how to right click a web page, hit "print", and choose "save as PDF" to produce a full and unbroken capture of the entirety of a webpage.
sometimes they'll just copy the text of a transcript and paste it right into the message of an email. that's if they figure out the difference between the body text portion of the email and the subject line, because quite frankly they often don't.
these are people who in most cases have done at least some college work already, but they have absolutely no clue how to utilize the attachment function in an email, and for some reason they don't consider they could google very quickly for instructions or even videos.
i am not taking a shit on gen z/gen alpha here, i'm really not.
what i am is aghast that they've been so massively failed on so many levels. the education system assumed they were "native" to technology and needed to be taught nothing. their parents assumed the same, or assumed the schools would teach them, or don't know how themselves and are too intimidated to figure it out and teach their kids these skills at home.
they spend hours a day on instagram and tiktok and youtube and etc, so they surely know (this is ridiculous to assume!!!) how to draft a formal email and format the text and what part goes where and what all those damn little symbols means, right? SURELY they're already familiar with every file type under the sun and know how to make use of whatever's salient in a pinch, right???
THEY MUST CERTAINLY know, innately, as one knows how to inhale, how to type in business formatting and formal communication style, how to present themselves in a way that gets them taken seriously by formal institutions, how to appear and be competent in basic/standard digital skills. SURELY. Of course. RIGHT!!!!
it's MADDENING, it's insane, and it's frustrating from the receiving end, but even more frustrating knowing they're stumbling blind out there in the digital spaces of grown-up matters, being dismissed, being considered less intelligent, being talked down to, because every adult and system responsible for them just
ASSUMED they should "just know" or "just figure out" these important things no one ever bothered to teach them, or half the time even introduce the concepts of before asking them to do it, on the spot, with high educational or professional stakes.
kids shouldn't have to supplement their own education like this and get sneered and scoffed at if they don't.
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I've got those requests almost at the same time jsrfwwxewe also I fucked up big time and accidentally deleted them but thanks god I've made the screenshots
I've been looking forward to writing something nsfw for him lmao
nsfw headcanons w/Aventurine
characters - Aventurine notes - gn!reader, nsfw, subby!Aven. Somehow turned into a character study. Somewhat angsty but with a turn for hurt/comfort. No beta.
Okay, first of all, he's no virgin. But he's NOT a manwhore either. Like for some reason when it comes to the cunning characters it's always either he's a dickrider-pussydestroyer-900 or he's actually a fragile innocent virgin baby. Not the case with Aventurine, not on my watch at least.
I mean it's pretty much canon that the only moment he feels truly alive is when he's gambling so he won't seek sex for the purpose of filling up the hole in his heart. And I don't see him as a lustful person in general.
He has one-night stands from time to time though. Not particularly often but once in a while he feels a certain level of frustration and stress budling up in him so in order to distress without losing his cool he seeks sexual relief. For him it's a safe way to relax a bit without actually taking off the mask of a frivolous and confident man.
Also. He's very touch starved. Not even in a lustful way, he just wants to feel someone's touch. Someone on twitter pointed out that he's practically hugging himself on his e6 and I haven't been the same ever since.
And now look at his body language in almost every cutscene. He has his arms crossed and is generally pretty reversed. I think he doesn't trust people around enough to be in his personal space but when it's a part of the sexual act, it's just natural. He doesn't have to feel exposed. So yeah. This is another reason why he seeks sex.
Now do you remember what Sparkle said to him? About stripping himself naked for Sunday and all that? Yeah I feel like he gets comments like that a lot due to people's prejudice against Avgins. People are usually not this straightforward butttt the idea behind their comments is the same.
He may act unaffected as long as he wants to but I do think it messed him up quite a bit.
Due to his fucked up views on his own value and his sexuality he doesn't have a healthy set of boundaries with his partners, allowing them to be as mean and rough as they want. And I don't mean just kinky stuff, I mean genuinely uncaring partners who really don't give a shit about Aven's comfort. I think subconsciously he seeks people like this. In his eyes, it's better this way, otherwise he may crumble from a gently and caring touch.
So yeah. His sexual encounters usually leave him sore and exhausted. The initial feeling of relief washes away in the morning, leaving him more empty than before.
Okay now to the happier part because we are 466 words in and I still didn't say anything good or sexy.
If the two of you started your relationship as a fling then initially he would be surprised because of how observant and attentive you are.
"My, my, how caring you are. But don't worry about me, you're free to use me as you wish" he says in the same flirty tone as usual. And you just. Stare.
He acts like he's bored while you literally pry the information out of him and, well, he doesn't give you anything specific anyway so you have to ask questions during the whole prosses to make sure he's doing fine. Orrr you just set for something very vanilla just in case.
In reality he's a bit confused. Has mixed feeling about this. Being treated with such care makes it harder for him to hide behind his mask but it feels so nice.
And when he realizes that he has actual feelings for you he just. Stops sleeping with you lmao. If you have questions about this he'll find 2134144 excuses but in reality he just tries to figure out his own feelings.
If you started off as friends then he would not try to sleep with you until you start dating. At first he just doesn't want to mix up this dynamics. And when he catches feelings, he just tries to make sense of it. Plus since sex is not something entirely positive for him, he's just kind of... unsure how it may affect your relationship even if it's obvious that the two of you want each other.
Okay now the real talk. When the two of you are officially lovers be prepared to face his messed up views on his own sexuality. Will probably need a lot of reassurance, attention and aftercare to realize the importance of his own safety and comfort. Learns to value himself through you.
A very good lover, knows how to please you and wants to please you. His previous sex partners weren't important to him so he didn't go out of his way to make them feel good but with you it's a different story. Literally worships your body, pressing kisses everywhere. Especially likes your thighs. Kisses them, bites them, leaves marks all over them. Loooooves teasing them while keeping eye contact with you right before giving you oral.
I feel like he's a switch but leans towards being a sub. May dom if you want him to or, rarely, if he feels like it.
May look like a brat but is not actually a brat. Well, most of the time. He's a tease but still does pretty much everything you want without making you work for it. However, if he's in a playful mood, may get all cheeky with you. Says stuff like: "Oh, that's all? I know you can do better" or "My dearest, don't disappoint me, okay? You know I don't make deals that don't pay off" just to rile you up. He loves being tamed okay. He knows you won't hurt him so him being all cheeky and disobedient is actually a huge sign that he's comfortable with you and trusts you fully.
Worship his body and he'll melt. Like. He'll genuinely crumble.
Goes all worked up and needy and soft and completely submissive in your arms.
Loves loves loves edging you. And fucking hate being edged. And by "hates" I mean he will whine and sulk and beg you to let him cum already. Secretly loves it but won't admit. You know it anyway since he never tries to stop you, obeying your every command, like a good boy he is. If you tell him that you'll stop doing that if he actually wants you to he'll huff and admit that he's not actually against you being a meanie.
Loves marking your body and loves when you mark his. HOWEVER would prefer to leave/have hickeys on the parts of your bodies that are usually covered. Doesn't want to create any rumors and doesn't want to make you uncomfortable. However, if you're into this, he'll gladly cover your entire neck with hickeys.
Is actually very sensitive pretty much everywhere so it's quite easy to overstimulate him. Once again, he'll whine but would never be against it.
Has the pretties moans and is very loud as well.
Doesn't have a lot of stamina so if he tops and you're still not satisfied after he cums, he'll use toys to entertain you up until he is ready for another round. If he bottoms then please give him some time to rest. Andddd kiss all over his body so he would get worked up again as soon as possible.
Has a praise kink. And a bit of a degradation kink too actually. Don't just insult him, mix it up with a praise and boom he's ready to cum.
Loves aftercare. Both giving and receiving it. He feels extremely vulnerable after a sensual lovemaking session so please just hold him and tell him he did great.
#hsr#aventurine#aventurine x reader#hsr aventurine#honkai star rail#sub aventurine#reader insert#walp's writing
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Satoru’s favorite toy
This was influenced by a request I received. It’s not been checked so will probably have grammatical errors here and there.
TW: stepcest, pseudo incest, noncon, somno, choking, non consensual recording
Don’t like, don’t interact,
StepBro! Satoru who leans he’s soon going to be having a new sister after his father remarries the mistress who shattered his family
StepBro! Satoru who seethes at the thought of having to share with some sluts bastard child
StepBro! Satoru who builds up resentment towards you before meeting you just to have it all disappear upon meeting you in person
StepBro! Satoru who no longer resents his father for remarrying but is grateful for him bringing home a new toy
StepBro! Satoru who offers to help set up your new bedroom but instead is hides hidden cameras in multiple areas of your room.
Clueless you who would never think that the smoke detector on your ceiling could be anything insidious nor do you ever question the plugs on your walls, sure they look slightly different from the ones in the common areas but you pay it no mind.
Clueless you who thinks locking your door grants you the privacy to undress or the privacy to slide your hand between your legs and rub circles on your clit while muffling your cute whimpers.
StepBro! Satoru who goes through the footage of you in your room every night, his right hand on the mouse and his left gripping his hard cock
He takes screenshots of your body, sharing them with his friend Suguru, showing off that he got a “hot stepsis” and sleezy Suguru who just loves to get off to naive cute girls like yourself, hoping he gets a turn after Satoru gets his hands on you
It wasn’t much longer before he did get his hands on you. It was during the winter, your parents left for vacation and to Satoru’s convenience, you got sick and had to stay home in bed whilst he was left to care for you.
He made sure you got all the supplements and medicine prescribed and then some. Maybe he did add a sleeping pill into the mix every now and then. Maybe he did take advantage of your unconscious figure each time you passed out.
He would take your limp hand into his and stroke his hard leaking girth with it. Chills crawled up his spine as he felt your soft fingers graze the veins decorating his shaft. He wrapped his hand around yours, and begin stroking himself with a tight grip.
While your breathing remained slow and even paced his started to speed up, the excitement of his hot sister touching his cock turned him in so much but the smug pride he feels for taking advantage of your unconscious form is what’s making his eyes roll back.
As his hips begin to pick up speed he began to pant and worry less about remaining quiet. What does it matter if you wake, you can’t beat him, especially not in your current state. You were so sick you could barely feed yourself. You probably got sick on purpose, desperate for your big brother Satoru’s attention.
Sure he could have any girl he wanted but all he wanted right now is to conquer you.
He grew sick of using your hand and wanted something more, something wet, something tight. He dropped your hand and it limply fell, hanging off the side of the bed, letting the cool night air dry off the precum that dripped down the palm of your hand.
The bed started to sink as he began to crawl on top of you. His legs straddling your weak body as you foolishly slept without a clue of the danger you were in.
He hunched his body forward and pushed his lips against yours, his tongue grazing your bottom lip before sitting back up onto his haunches and scooting further up your body. At this point his legs were on either side of your shoulders, he caressed your face, dragging his hand from your temple to yours chin, gently pulling your mouth open. He slid just the tip of his length between your lips, enjoying the sensation of your tongue instinctively rubbing itself against his mushroom head.
He began to tilt his hips further as more and more of his length slid into your mouth. When he felt his dick hit the back of your throat he heard you gag, and briefly worried about you waking up. But all you did was twist up your face and continue to sleep. So he felt more comfortable to push himself further and deeper. Once he was so deep he could feel your throat grip his cock as it tried to dislodge the obstruction. You started to gag more but he kept slowly rocking his hips back and forth barely giving you time to breathe.
Your lashes began to flutter as your eyes struggled to open, unable to process whats in front of them. You don’t quite know it yet but what you’re staring at is your step brothers lower abdomen, what you feel tickling your nose is his bluntly shaved pubic hair brushing against your upper lip and nose every time he thrust forward.
Your struggle to breathe jolts you awake, and you immediately grip at his thighs to stop him from moving, but your sleepy weak body is no match for him, satoru is too lost chasing his own orgasm to care that you’re awake, to care that he might be hurting you, ignoring your hands squeezing against his thighs he simply interlocks his fingers in the back of your head and holds you in place so he can continue abusing your throat over and over again. Every time you tries to scream your voice would cause vibrations along his length sending him over the edge.
He tightly gripped your hair and pushed your face against his pelvis as he pumped load after load down your throat. With his dick shoved so far down your throat you had no choice but to swallow it all like the good girl you are.
When he climbed from on top of you, your lungs immediately fought to get back the air they lost. You heaved and coughed regurgitating some of his several loads of cum before you were able to breathe normal again.
By the time you came to, Satoru was long gone from your room, you struggled to process all that happened to you before inevitably falling back to sleep.
#Jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#tw.noncon#tw.somnophilia#gojo satoru smut#tw.dark content#tw.yandere#yoleleiswriting#dead dove fic#ddde
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AlterEgo
The last thing I expected on my 20th birthday was to receive a gift from Cody, my roommate. We were never close, and there was no way in hell he actually knew much about me to know it was my birthday without me telling him. Him and I were basically complete opposites. While I was your typical nerd, smart, introverted, and so on, he was basically your typical jock in all the worst ways. He was boisterous, arrogant, and a total meathead. We mostly agreed to stay out of each others’ way, considering our irreconcilable differences, but that didn’t stop him from being a massive pain in the ass. His room was constantly in a state of disarray, with sweaty clothes scattered all over the place. As such, I often avoided being anywhere near his room if necessary since it smelled like a locker room. He often invited over his “bros” who were just as bad. Whether they were hogging the TV to watch whatever game was on, smuggling alcohol into our dorm to get wasted, or playing catch in the fucking living room, they were always a nuisance. And whenever I brought any of that up to him, he would always end up saying something like “It’s not that serious, dude. We were just having a good time.” Yeah, a good time at my expense. Whoever assigned the two of us to live together must’ve thought this was some twisted joke.
I woke up at 9 AM, still a little tired from last night. I hung out at one of my friends’ dorms to celebrate my birthday. I yawned, and went to the kitchen to make some breakfast. I saw Cody was up as well, his legs spread across the couch, to the point that he was taking up two seats, watching something on the TV that was several volume levels too loud for me.
“Hey bro, today’s your birthday right?” Cody asked, as he tilted his head to face me.
“Uhh, yeah. How did you know?” I responded.
“Oh don’t worry about it, bro. Happy birthday!” I saw him get up and run to his disorganized room, likely to grab something for me. I could see a pair of worn gym shorts on the floor through the crack in the door. He pulled out an old Nike shoe box, since he likely had nothing better to put a gift in. “I’ve been saving this for you. I hope you like it!” Is this his way of trying to get on my good side?
I rolled my eyes since I doubt he got me anything I would enjoy. He probably just got me something that he’d enjoy, like some tight-fitting tank top or protein powder or something. Not that I work out or anything. The only gift I’d want from him is for him to stop being a douche. I opened the box and I was surprised about what I saw. It was a video game. Not any that I’d ever heard of. I looked at the box art and the words AlterEgo were written in a wacky, colorful font.
“Yeah, I knew you like video games, so I found this for you. I heard on the internet that it’s pretty nitch…nichy…what’s the word…”
“Niche?” I responded. I had to admit, him struggling to pronounce the word right was a little amusing. As amusing as being with a simpleton like him could be.
“That’s the word! I got it for myself, but I realized like half an hour in that it wasn’t my thing. I’m happy with what I have right now. I figured you’d probably get more out of it than me.”
“Thanks, I guess.”
“No problem, dude. Anyways, I gotta hit the gym. I’m gonna be out all day so you have the PS5 all to yourself. Hope you enjoy it bro!”
I watch him leave, thankful to have some peace and quiet. As I ate breakfast, I read the back of the cover in order to figure out what this game was about.
“Become a new you! In this life simulation adventure, you can become any kind of person you want and live any way you choose. Control your fictional avatar, your AlterEgo, and level up your stats to become closer to your true self.”
The game seemed something like The Sims or Animal Crossing, but with some stat progression system. It was a game that I had never heard of, but it could be some hidden gem. The rest of the back was filled with screenshots from the game with the cartoony characters doing activities such as cooking, jogging, and riding a motorcycle. I figured I might as well try the game since I did get it for free. Even if it was from Cody, I wasn’t one to refuse someone’s generosity.
I put the game in the disk slot and booted it up. The title screen had that same logo and some bubbly background music. I pressed the start button and I was presented with a save selection screen. I noticed that Cody’s save was on there, which was odd because I was playing on my account. I knew I should’ve put a password on it. I wanted to make my own character, but part of me was curious about the character that he made. Knowing him, I can only guess. His game time was less than an hour, as he was only on Day 1, and he likely spent most of that time on the character creation screen.
I started his save and my character was sitting in his room. At this point, it was very bare, with only a bed and a bunch of cardboard boxes scattered around the room. I guess the character starts by moving into their new home? I went into the menu to find more information about the character. The character was named Cody obviously and his AlterEgo somewhat matched him too. I went into the stats screen and I was greeted by a tutorial.
“Here you can check your AlterEgo’s stats. You have already set your initial growth modifiers and assigned your base stats. If you need a refresher, whatever stats you chose your AlterEgo to excel at are highlighted in red and the ones you chose to trade off are highlighted in blue. This means that your AlterEgo will grow in the stats in red much faster and prioritize activities that increase those stats and avoid activities associated with increasing your stats in blue. As you play, your AlterEgo will naturally develop into one of hundreds of potential archetypes based on the activities that they excel at. Experiment and see who you become!”
I looked at the stat screen and saw a list of stats with a bar indicating percentage level. The stats included Strength, Constitution, Dexterity, Intelligence, Wisdom, Courage, Charisma, and Luck. Not too far off from DnD I guess. It seemed like he chose to have Strength and Constitution as his highest stats as their font was colored red and Intelligence and Wisdom as his weakest stats as they were colored in blue. Gee, why am I not surprised… Cody was anything but a genius. It seemed like he had 20 initial points to allocate wherever he chose with a default limit of 5. And I was equally not surprised to find that my meathead roommate chose to put 5 in Strength and Constitution again like a barbarian. It’s like all he cared about was his looks and perceived masculinity, even in game.
Strength (physical strength): 5
Constitution (physical build and stamina): 5
Dexterity (agility and flexibility): 2
Intelligence (knowledge): 0
Wisdom (intuition and discipline): 0
Courage (risk-taking and bravery): 3
Charisma (social skills): 3
Luck (good or bad fortune): 2
After looking through his stats, I decided enough was enough and I didn’t really want to go around pretending I was Cody the whole game. I quit out of his save and went back to the title screen. I was back on the save select screen when I became confused. There was still one save, except the name of the character wasn’t Cody…it was mine? The play time was set to 0 minutes. I don’t know how that happened, but if it saves me the trouble of building a character and reading more tutorials, I’m happy.
To my relief, the avatar representing Cody wasn’t there. Instead, a very generic, average character stood in its place in the same room. I wouldn’t be surprised if this was some placeholder account with everything set to the default. Whatever, I can probably change stuff about him later. I decided to move my AlterEgo outside and I was greeted by a map of a large city. I chose an area of the map to explore at random and controlled my new avatar. On the busy city street, there was a cafe, restaurant, and a gym. It was too early for the cafe and restaurant to open, so I guess my only option here is the gym. I’ve never stepped foot in a gym before, but this character doesn’t have to represent me as a whole. Plus, I’d like my character to be well-rounded unlike Cody’s who would probably spend the whole time grinding here.
I went into the gym and had to perform a set of quick-time events. First, I had to do some bench presses. Then some squats. Then finally, run on a treadmill. At the end of it, my AlterEgo did a cartoony celebration and flexed his arms. A pop-up showing that my Strength, Constitution, and Dexterity went up by 1, followed up by another one saying that my Strength and Constitution will double every time I do activities like go to the gym. So it looks like Cody’s modifiers carried over after all despite everything seeming to be the default. That should’ve been the first thing I checked. I didn’t want my character to be specced to be some lumbering brute. I suppose that if I wanted to get my character’s Intelligence and Wisdom, it’d probably be like playing on Hard mode. Honestly, I was open to the challenge.
I was disappointed to find out that it’d be harder than it seemed. When my character got home in the evening, I went into one of his boxes and I was presented with an option to read. I was presented with several options, ranging from comics to full-on novels. I chose the novel since I figured it would raise my Intelligence the best. I watched my AlterEgo try to read the book, but I saw a look of confusion on his face. Eventually, he grew frustrated and threw the book back into the empty box as if he were shooting through a basketball hoop. I expected my Intelligence to stay the same, but no, it actually dropped!
“Sometimes when your AlterEgo fails to complete an activity, their stats can decrease! These stats can even go into the negative. Make sure to keep your stats high because it can become very difficult to increase your stats if they fall below a certain point.”
I couldn’t believe that my character struggled to even read. This guy was nothing like me at all! I hoped that it would be easier to raise my AlterEgo’s Intelligence because I didn’t want him to be a moron. I watched my character fall asleep and I could see into his dream. Another tutorial popped up.
“Sometimes your character will have dreams! These dreams are mostly random, but will also depend on your character’s stats. Just like other activities, you have a chance to increase your stats.”
I watched my character fight in a zombie apocalypse, but the zombies didn’t even look remotely threatening. I succeeded in the activity and my Courage went up by 2 and my Luck and Strength went up by 1. My character wiped his head of sweat as the zombies turned to dust.
The next day, I learned that my AlterEgo can go to school. That was expected, considering my character’s age, only I didn’t realize how hard it would be for him. He was sitting in a desk trying to write down notes. Eventually, like an idiot, he slammed his thick head on his desk and started snoring. This was honestly getting embarrassing. My Intelligence and Wisdom dropped yet again, not by 1, but by 2. If I didn’t do something different, my AlterEgo would basically be a clone of Cody instead of myself. After class, instead of being given an option to go and do something, my AlterEgo is approached by a group of buff men.
Quarterback: Hey new guy, you’re looking pretty strong. Judging from your Strength and Constitution, I think you’d make a good fit for the football team. Your Dexterity and Courage also seem pretty good. Wanna join, bro?
You know who else played football? Cody. I had to keep being reminded of him even when he wasn’t even around. This was my character and I didn’t care about sports, so I clicked the no option. To my surprise, my AlterEgo nodded instead. It's like this game is going out of its way to spite me at this point. Two tutorials popped up.
“If your Wisdom is too low, your AlterEgo might act on their own desires rather than your command. This means that they can sometimes act on their own or select activities that they are more interested in rather than those they are not. Raise your Wisdom or else you will have less freedom when developing your AlterEgo.”
“You have decided to join a club or organization. This will grant you a passive growth to certain stats every week.”
I watched as my AlterEgo walked away with the group of jocks. A football uniform magically appeared over his normal clothes. For joining the football team, I was granted a point in Strength, Constitution, Courage, and Charisma every week, with the usual double for Strength and Constitution.
I kept playing the game, getting frustrated at my AlterEgo’s reluctance to even try to act smart or reasonable. He frequently avoided or skipped intellectual pursuits to focus on those that made him look or feel good. It honestly just felt random whether he wanted to obey me or not. By the end of Day 7, the first week my stats were looking like this.
Strength: 30
Constitution: 28
Dexterity: 10
Intelligence: -20
Wisdom: -15
Courage: 21
Charisma: 17
Luck: 16
My Intelligence and Wisdom seemed unfixable. My AlterEgo wouldn’t even bother to try to read or pay attention at school and he consistently started to make random choices that satisfied his needs as the week progressed. I grew incredibly frustrated at this, but out of curiosity, I wanted to see if there was an end to this so I could go back and make my own character. Either way, this game was plagued with questionable design choices. It’s like the AlterEgo was already locked into a specific path. I hoped that I had accidentally skipped a tutorial or something and that I hadn’t softlocked myself out of raising certain stats. Unfortunately, my AlterEgo’s stats continued to grow and drop as I hit Day 30.
Strength: 75
Constitution: 69
Dexterity: 44
Intelligence: -66
Wisdom: -49
Courage: 54
Charisma: 37
Luck: 41
I received another tutorial message on Day 31.
“You look like you are on track to evolve into your archetype very soon! By this point, your AlterEgo’s stats will be locked in place. That will be the end of the main story, but there is still so much to enjoy afterwards!”
I figured I might as well see this through to the end. You know, see how much of an idiot my character can become. Despite my efforts, all my AlterEgo does now is work out, practice and go to games, and go to parties, outside of necessities. His Intelligence is so low that he rarely even goes to school anymore and that has caused his intelligence to plummet to the bottom. I played for even longer, eventually hitting Day 60. Turns out that this is the day I would discover my AlterEgo’s archetype.
“Congratulations on making it this far. I hope you are excited to find out your archetype, because I know I am! Remember that these changes are permanent, so there will no longer be ways to increase or decrease your stats.”
I watched my AlterEgo marched onto the stage and I was able to view my final stats and a rating of each of them. The descriptions seemed to be heavily based on my other stats, and trust me, they were very satirical, and in my case, very scathing.
Strength: 100
I’d give this an A+. I’m not even sure if you are human anymore. I’ve seen you lift things that no normal man could, not because you have to, but because you want to. You spend more time at the gym than you do at your own house and you might give The Hulk a run for his money.
Constitution: 100
You also get an A+. Your months of training at the gym have given you a perfect, chiseled body that looks like it could be made out of iron. You have a seemingly endless supply of testosterone and your stamina (in more ways than one, it seems) cannot be beaten.
Dexterity: 75
This gets a B. You are very athletic and quick on your feet despite your appearance. However, your large size means that you can be pretty clumsy and you’ve probably broken more things than you’d like to admit.
Intelligence: -100
I’ll just go along with your teachers and give you a big fat F. Are you even trying? I worry that there’s not a single thought going around in your thick skull. You care very little for anything intellectual or sophisticated, not that you even know what those words mean.
Wisdom: -90
Likewise, you also get another big fat F. Were you dropped on your head when you were a baby or did you take too many tackles to your cranium? You have incredibly poor judgment and you only make decisions that satisfy your brutish desires. In short, you often act before you think. Your lack of discipline is only matched by your lack of brain cells. As long as you’re having fun, should I really care what you do with your life?
Courage: 90
I’d give this an A, but not an A+. Because your brain moves too slow to process any risk, you often think before you act. You often find yourself in the most dangerous of situations and you often perform incredibly stupid stunts. When you’re on the field, you’re a risk taker, and at least it usually pays off. On the bright side, you always come out unscathed, so I can commend that.
Charisma: 70
I’d give this a B-. Being on the football team and being very attractive is going to place a lot of eyes on you, but they are all focused on your body because everything else you have to offer is very superficial. I wonder if you surround yourself with people who think and act the same as you do or if people keep you around to laugh at every stupid word that comes out of your mouth.
Luck: 80
Lastly, you get a B. Your luck genuinely amazes me sometimes. Despite everything, despite your lack of any intellectual thought or reasoning, you have survived long enough to make it this far in life. This alone proves that life favors some over others. If there is room for the concept of a higher power in your shrunken headspace, then they probably feel a sense of amusement at the state of you bumbling around through life with only your good looks and muscles salvaging you.
“What do you think? Are you happy with your results? Anyhow, it’s time to reveal your archetype. It’s who you are and who you will be from now on! Drumroll please… (As if it wasn’t obvious enough…) You, my friend, are…THE JOCK!”
The Jock
You are likely an athlete or bodybuilder and you likely care little for intellectual thought. You enjoy playing and watching sports and working out above anything else. You are hyper-masculine, aggressive, arrogant, and egotistical. However, you are also very muscular, tall, athletic, popular, and handsome. You feel a deep sense of camaraderie with anyone you consider your bro, which mostly includes other jocks like yourself. Your wardrobe mostly consists of tank tops, jerseys, varsity jackets, shorts, sweatpants, jockstraps, baseball caps, sneakers, and everything in between. Because of your high testosterone and your above average genitals, you are viewed as a desirable partner and often partake in sexual activities with members of the opposite sex, and sometimes even other men depending on the person and situation. Your most likely career path is as an athlete or coach, but as long as it doesn’t require too much deep thinking, you could probably find a job anywhere with your connections and attractiveness. Enjoy your new self!
I watched my AlterEgo vanish within a cloud of smoke and come out a cartoonish representation of your average stereotypical jock with blonde hair and a very lunkish, yet admittedly impressive build. He looked around, clearly disoriented, with a dull, confused look on his face before flexing with a cheesy, confident smirk on his face. The audience cheered and clapped at this ridiculous personification of a walking stereotype as if they were watching a magic show. Honestly, it was almost amusing how the description it gave for “me” couldn’t possibly be more wrong. It sounded like everything Cody was, not me. Although I guess I was playing with his settings, not by choice I will add, but I had little control over how my AlterEgo decided to live its life. I just wish I could get him off my mind for just one day. Either way, I found myself incredibly dissatisfied with my new AlterEgo, but I accidentally found out a way to make things even worse for me. I just wanted to scroll through the remaining text to get to the credits, since I have been playing for 8 hours by now, when I saw a selection that would seal my fate.
“Are you satisfied with your result? Now that you’ve discovered who you truly are, are you ready to be The Jock in the real world? WARNING: If you select Yes, your save will be deleted as a result. These changes are permanent. If you click No, you can continue playing after the credits.”
I accidentally clicked Yes as I was mashing through the text. What the hell was I thinking?! I had no idea that this would change the entire trajectory of my life. At first I felt nothing, as the screen faded to black. Then, I saw the credits start to roll, playing a remix of the joyful title screen music, and that’s when I started to feel all warm inside and I felt a painful shock come from my controller.
I felt a sudden wave of pain rush through my body as my bones started to crack and shift in my body and my muscles began to inflate like balloons. I looked at the credits and noticed that the new jock AlterEgo was doing the things he normally enjoyed doing in the background. But I couldn’t really concentrate on it as I found myself focusing down below. My legs stretched and stretched until I was around 6’4. My feet grew to a size 15 and my thick glutes and ass made me sink deeper into the couch from their weight. The fat in my stomach felt like it was melting as it left behind nothing more than a layer of sweat and a firm six pack of abs. My upper chest formed into a round set of bouncy pecs. Likewise, my biceps and triceps were almost the size of my head now and my soft hands became rough and covered in calluses from intense lifting. I felt my clothes cling tightly to my body as if they were two sizes too small, and they’d easily rip if my body grew any more. My shirt fit more like a crop top on me and my clothes were damp from pit and ass sweat.
I felt my long hair recede into my head until it formed into a shorter cut that was much easier to maintain. As it did that, my chestnut-colored locks lightened into a golden blonde. My soft, round eyes became more sharp and masculine and I could feel them turn from a chocolate brown into an icy shade of blue. My youthful face lost most of its baby fat and buried beneath it was nothing more than the chiseled edges of my jawline. The lower half of my face, which used to be soft and hairless, was now covered in a prickly lawn of stubble. Even my pasty skin turned a shade tanner from the years I spent in the sun throwing balls around. I noticed that my entire body started to sweat profusely to the point that I could smell my own musk and I became absorbed by my new-found masculine scent. I could smell the testosterone that was pumping through my veins like a drug. I felt powerful, dominant, virile, and dare I say it, good… Lastly, I found my lips contort into an obnoxious, conceited smirk. Was I…enjoying this? Judging from the growing feeling in my groin, I was led to believe that I was. And it kept growing and growing and growing…
All the while, the credits continued to play and the happy-go-lucky music felt like it was mocking my painful situation. Despite the strange pleasure I felt, it was only a distraction as my body still writhed in pain through the whole process while I changed entirely into a real life manifestation of my AlterEgo. What the hell is this game? I noticed that the jock avatar stared directly towards the screen, as if he was breaking the fourth wall, and started to walk closer and closer before vanishing from his virtual prison for good. The lively credits started to simmer down, giving the screen a more empty and disquieting feeling. That was the last thing I noticed before I felt a sharp headache ring through my head. I am usually fine playing games for a long period of time so why…Why did my roommate buy me this game anyways, bro? If he was gonna buy me any game, he should’ve gotten me the new CoD or Madden game, not this weird shit. I had to admit, it was kinda addicting. I liked being able to work out or play sports even when I’m at home. Wait, what was that? I felt like I just heard another voice in my head, both sounding similar yet different to my own. Eventually he called out directly to me.
“Hey bro, it’s me. Your AlterEgo. You know, the real you. It’s been fun, dude. Now I get to enter the real world, isn’t that sick? So here’s what’s gonna happen, dude. I am currently inside your mind and I’m making the final changes to turn you into the person you were always meant to be. That’s right dude, we are becoming one singular person in both body and mind. Don’t try to struggle or fight back. You know I’m stronger than you. There’s no going back. So, are you ready to become one with your true self?
No…I thought to myself. I wasn’t a jock. I was never a jock. I’m nothing like my AlterEgo. This is a mistake. This was Cody’s AlterEgo, not mine!
“Chill out, bro. I know you read the warning and you clicked Yes, so you obviously knew the risk. Why did you keep playing if you knew you’d become a jock regardless of the decisions you made? Because you are one deep down. Or maybe you secretly wanted to be one. Maybe you wanted to see what life was like on the other side. Maybe this Cody guy wanted you to try out this save, you know, to see what would happen... Whatever reasoning, it really doesn’t matter dude. I know you can feel me taking over your mind. You’re finding it harder to think. Soon you’ll be The Jock, me. I just wish you realized a little sooner who you really were…”
I felt my brain starting to shut off and my vision starting to become blurry as my AlterEgo took it over. I don’t even know how any of this is possible, even by today’s standards. An AI buried deep within the game was taking over my body and mind entirely, reshaping me in his image. But I continued to resist, to cling onto whatever parts of my personality I could. However, as I felt my mind sink deeper and deeper into this mental void, I felt myself slowly becoming more and more like The Jock. The archetype that was decided on, not by me, but for me. Until that’s all I was.
Everything turned black for a few seconds. I slowly regained consciousness as my brain rebooted itself. Wait…what’s a reboot? I sat and watched the credits with a dim look on my face as it finally ended. I was booted back to the title screen and saw that my save was indeed deleted. This was proof that my AlterEgo was now a part of me and that he was finally whole. I pulled out my phone wanting to learn more about this game, because, dude, it was kinda fucking weird. By scrolling, I couldn’t find much, but I did discover a post from not too long ago on some ancient forum site that was probably made in the early 2000s.
“Is The Game AlterEgo Real?”
“I’ve heard rumors about this game called AlterEgo, but I have very little information on it. It’s said to be incredibly dangerous and could lead to permanent bodily and mental changes. Throughout all of my research, I could not find any copy of the game for sale, nor any definitive proof that it’s real or any information on the company that developed it. If you have any information on this game, please let me know.”
I skimmed through the forum page, not that interested in reading what everyone had to say. Who has time for that anyways? But I did find one reply that caught my eye.
“I can confirm with certainty that AlterEgo does exist. My friend received it as a gift for Christmas and he wouldn’t stop talking about it to me. It’s like he was addicted. A week later, when I saw him next, I could barely even recognize him. His body had grown and changed greatly and he didn’t act like his usual self. I even feel like his memories might be a little distorted. I tried checking his house to find the game in order to figure out what it was all about, but I don’t think he has it anymore. He probably sold it or gave it away since he said he finished it. No matter what, he won’t tell me. If there are any other copies of the game left, please let me know.”
Woah, so this game is fucking weird, dude. Wasn’t just me. I just played it right? But I don’t feel any different. You know, I bet these nerds would pay a lot for a chance to find out about this game. Maybe they might come out as different people. I’ll put it up on eBay for a high price. One of those dweebs just has to take the bait. I wouldn’t mind a little cash though. I’d feel bad for selling Cody’s gift, but just imagine what I could get with that much money.
“Hey bro, you still in here dude?” I heard a familiar voice shout as they opened the door.
“Yo Cody, there you are. What’s up dude?” I was happy to see him. Cody was my roommate and my best friend. We were practically inseparable. When he made eye contact with me, his eyes widened. I couldn’t really blame him for being impressed with my awesome body.
“You beat that game I gave you already?” He seemed surprised, yet almost impressed.
“Yeah, it’s not usually my type, but I enjoyed it dude.”
“Do you…feel any different, bro?” Cody sounded kinda hesitant there. Had he read about the rumors too? I don’t see why he’d have to worry. None of those rumors are true anyways.
“Nah, same as I’ve always been.”
“Alright, good. I was just making sure you were down to get some food. You should be out partying and celebrating your birthday, not playing some nerdy video game. And trust me, I know all the good spots.”
“You’re right bro. I haven’t gotten enough exercise in today. Let’s go.”
“Wait, before you go, your clothes are so sweaty dude. You should change.”
“Oh shit, good idea.”
“Y-you can just wear one of my clothes. They’d probably fit you better.” He was right. As I soon realized, someone shrunk all my clothes as part of a prank.
Me and Cody went to a sports bar to watch the game. If I remember correctly, this was our favorite spot to get food, except you know, anywhere that lets me hit my macros. Since it was my birthday, he even paid for the whole meal. I don’t remember how long I’ve known him, but couldn’t ask for a better bro. On the way home, Cody grabbed a six pack of beer from the frat house and brought it to our dorm to drink the night away. I wasn’t old enough to drink, but it’s not like I never had alcohol before. And besides, today was basically my cheat day.
We got wasted while we watched TV, and we did some things that I probably wouldn’t admit to anyone but him. I couldn’t help it though. I hadn’t gotten laid all weekend and it was my birthday. Quite frankly, I deserved it. Thankfully Cody took one for the team. He said it wasn’t weird because we’ve definitely done it before and that it was our secret. I had to give him credit. His tight hole is better than most girls’. I didn’t know he was a bottom until tonight. I also didn’t remember having a dick this big, but you don’t see me complaining. After all was said and done, I passed out drunk next to him in his bed, our bodies drenched in sweat and each other’s fluids, as I enjoyed the bromance I have with my best bro. This was the best birthday ever.
The next day, I got up extra early to go for a run despite my hangover. Afterwards I went to school, but like usual, I struggled to pay attention. It was like my mind was in a constant fog. My grades are slipping and this football scholarship is the only thing keeping me from dropping out entirely. After classes, I joined Cody and the others at practice. Throughout the day, I kept getting this feeling of uh…dayjah voo? That word that means that you feel like you’ve done something before. I wasn’t exactly sure where it was coming from. I shrugged it off. I was just a jock and I didn’t need to worry about stuff like that.
When I got home, I got an offer for the game Cody gave me. You know, AlterEgo. Some nerd seriously offered $1000 for it. I didn’t actually know it was that rare. I hope he enjoys it more than I did. I’ll sure enjoy the 1000 dollars. I bet he’ll love passing it around to all his other geeky friends. I wonder what their AlterEgos might look like…
#jock#jock bro#jock tf#jock transformation#jockification#male hypnosis#male tf#male transformation#mental change#muscle tf#dumbing down#dumb jock#dumber#dumbification#himbo tf#himbo#himbofication#gay tf#gay jock#football jock#college jock#nerd to jock#personality change#reality change
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PLAGIARISM UPDATE!
So, maybe I should not have said: "Hopefully this will have been the last we see of plagiarizer Kristynaka1." Perhaps from the exterior it may have seemed like it's been over, but it hasn't. Again, I've tried to deal with this silently in the background. However, my hands are tied at this point and I believe it's best to go public with this once again.
Let's rewind it a bit, shall we? In order to give y'all the full picture of what is going on.
DECEMBER 26, 2024
The story containing the plagiarism is deleted. Oh, what a joyous day. I had figured that would be the end of it, as there's nothing left to do but move on. But, as usual, I was proven wrong.
DECEMBER 27, 2024
I was made aware of an announcement post the plagiarizer made which I will share here. Keep in mind, to my knowledge I was still blocked but others alerted me and shared evidence with me.
Not too long after, I receive a message in my inbox. A message that states they were a neutral user on the issue but accused me of bullying.
I was initially suspicious of this message, but I decided to take their words into consideration. I asked others of their honest thoughts and opinions, because I genuinely wanted to know if I did anything wrong. Most agreed that the user truly didn't sound like they were a neutral party, and that it was likely the plagiarizer themself or a friend of theirs.
Later, I received a dm with practically the same message.
So what do I do? I block them. Perhaps that was wrong of me, and they accuse me of doing the same that they did when they blocked me. But I ask you to consider. Why would I want to continue to entertain this notion of accusations and messages when the ordeal is supposed to be over?
It's around this point where I'm notified by others that comments are continuously being made to defend me. These comments were appearing on the plagiarizer's Wattpad profile, often arguing with the plagiarizer only to get their commented deleted or profile blocked. But it was slowly and continuous. Which is one of the main reasons I am making this post, and is something I will address towards the end in more detail.
Later, I am notified by a few people that the user seen in the screenshot above, let's refer them to as IDK, was messaging multiple users asking for help and their opinion on the matter. IDK created a post accusing me of bullying. While these are heavy accusations, I personally see no truth in them. Again, since I had asked the honest opinion of others earlier when first messaged in my inbox.
Not too long after, I receive another very similar message in my inbox from an anon user. I don't even try to entertain it. I block the user, because at this point, it has become a form of spam or harassment.
The first comment and like on the bullying accusation post was made by a user named Kryllia. Basically they seemed to support what was said in the post. I bring them up because the post happened on a profile with no other posts or visible likes or reblogs. And if you see the current comments, which I won't show here because there are too many, their manner of speech is very similar to Kristynaka's own. Which is why I believe it might be an alt account or a friend of theirs. I also believe this because this account is blocked from my view, and I don't recall ever manually blocking this user, so it must've been them who sent one of the messages in my inbox on anon.
Anyways, those that were messaged by IDK and alerted me, informed me that their own opinions did not align with this new user's claim of neutrality. The post gained a bit of attention, but I attempted to do some damage control by messaging users privately to please keep this under wraps as I didn't want this spiraling out of hand. To which they all obliged and were very respectful.
I had assumed that this would fizzle out and nothing would happen. I was wrong. Now I had users alerting me to comments being made on Tumblr and on Wattpad.
DECEMBER 28, 2024
Now is probably a good time to bring up Teenfic.net and Penana. Just to remind you all. Some research was done and we found both the user and the copied stories on these sites. DO NOT go to these sites, as they are both ridden with malware!
Teenfic appears to be a mirror site that copies stories from Wattpad, so it likely saw the story from Wattpad and copied it. While Penana is a smaller and highly suspicious website where the plagiarizer likely created an account and posted the copied story since they were banned off Quotev and the story was taken off Wattpad. I'm not too concerned with Penana, since it's also full of malware and there's hardly any traction.
I will take the time to say that if you see any stories that are highly similar to mine, please make me aware privately before doing anything else! I imagine this plagiarizer will continue to use other people's work and claim it as their own. I will bring this up again later with more screenshots.
JANUARY 2, 2025
I'm notified by others that the user Kryllia has commented on the bullying accusation post again. Now, after reading their recent comments, they sound more and more like the plagiarizer Kristynaka. However, I'll let you be the judge of that.
So from the looks of it, their plan is to get my account deleted and also to feed original work into AI and claim the result as their own work. Which is not how writing works.
JANUARY 3, 2025
Today I made the decision to finally go public with this information. However, not for the reason y'all may suspect. I want to be honest with my readers. Although I truly believe there is no reason for my account to be banned, I just wanted to put this out there in case it does happen.
Most importantly, the main reason I wanted to make this post was because I want to discourage anymore interactions with the plagiarizer or their alts/friends. Please, no more comments or posts about it. While I appreciate any attempts that were made to defend me, I would like them to stop now as this is only prolonging the conflict. However, if anything does come up, please message me privately.
I would like this to stop, and the situation to end. I realize that it may not go according to plan, but I would rather not acknowledge anything else said by the plagiarizer or her proxies anymore unless the need to arises again.
Thank you to my readers and anyone reading this post. As I said above, please do not engage in any interactions with them, and I encourage you to share this post in the possible scenario that Kristynaka really does uses AI to copy from my works or others again in the future.
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Alexey Luchin, former Ice Pick Lodge employee, has commented to support the allegations against Dybowski, giving more insight and making additional accusations regarding grooming, physical and emotional abuse.
One of the most noteworthy things is his claims about Dybowski's current relationship with IPL. According to Luchin, Dybowski has not cut any ties with IPL or vice versa, and is only claiming that to avoid alimony payments:
Nikolay formally removed himself from the company (IPL) in a legal sense, in order to avoid paying adequate alimony. The payments on the screenshots are as low as 100$, which isn't nearly enough. [...] He's still working, the maneur [sic] is only to avoid alimony. Though I must say, these days the team is "carrying" him mostly. New Ice-Pick Lodge is great, there are lots of motivated people who gre up on old Ice-Pick games and are doing their very best!
Full comment thread here.
I will also post his comments below, for those who may not have or wish to visit Reddit. Special thanks to user Winterlings for asking follow-up questions, and of course a massive applause to Luchin for being willing to share this under his own name.
As a former colleague (I worked on Pathologic 1, The Void, Cargo, and a bit of uncredited work on Pathologic 2), I am sad to confirm, that this is most likely true. There is a link to follow the ongoing court considering the child alimony payments, and it looks like there will be another one, considering recent occusations. (As link to Russian websites are banned, see original source in the mod comment. You will need a VPN to go further down the first link in the post to see the court progress, or use google translate on that link to bypass the need for VPNs) I know Nikolay well, from at least 2006, and unfortunatelly his "misbehaviours" have been an open secret for a long time, on which I didn't comment for two reasons. One - he is not the studio, and isn't involved much in development since The Void - do NOT take out your anger on the talanted and good people working of Pathologic 3. Second - I've been kind of a coward, until I've learnt in 2018 or so, that a girlfriend of mine was also groomed by him, while we were still dating, and since then I broke all ties with Nikolay. He has been a raging, violent and erratic alcoholic, a sociopath and a pathological liar all these years. I personally know at least 10 people who he harmed directly in relation to public accusations (but it's their stories to tell, not mine). He is a manipulative sociopath, that is very good with words, another reason why these stories only surfaced now. The reason I'm speaking up right now is because I figured that after the last ephebophilia and grooming accusations, that cost him his job as a univercity teacher, and danger of going to court, he would change his ways. But things have gotten worse and more rotten since then. There isn't a reliable "reputation institution" in Russian gamedev, but it must start at some point. I believe the best path for Nikolay would be to leave Ice-Pick Lodge to not tarnish their reputation with his own fuckups, and leave the current studio to work as is - they're doing a great job on Pathologic 3, and they once again should NOT be harrassed for a single person's misdeeds.
When asked about identity verification:
I'm easily googlable by my handle, my name is Alexey "The LxR" Luchin. Though my work is uncredited on both Pathologics ironically, but also I'm falsely credited on Knock-Knock, which I haven't worked on. Anyhow, it'll be easy to find me in the credits for The Void and Cargo and by traces of my active participation in building the early game communities on the forums. :) Also possibly another colleague of mine in this thread may verify that it is indeed me, though I'd understand if they wish to remain anonymous.
Whether or not we as a community should hold IPL as a company responsible for this in some way, or go through with some financial boycott, I am leaning more and more towards at the very least requiring some kind of statement. Not only because of what Dybowski has done in his personal life, although that's more than bad enough, but because this crosses the line into actively having an impact on the dev team, the games, and in turn the community. I want to be able to know that this is something they take seriously and that Dybowski is gone, before I give them more money. But that is just my stance, and any nuanced take is of course welcome.
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in honor of the mma! abby x model! reader fic that is rotting in my drafts, i desperately wanna talk about the cute shit yall get into while pretending you're not dating - pt 2 if you care
free palestine! click this link for more info
☆ abby is so aggressively offline, but you are chronically online. in particular, you’re a livestream fiend. it’s a cute way to interact with your fans and it passes time while you’re getting ready for events. you two spend so much time pretending you aren’t together, but on more than one occasion people have screenshotted a figure that looks like her in the background. buff, long blonde hair, kind of tall, she’s hard to miss. you take delight in fucking with people so whenever people ask in your comments you reply with a quick
“no that’s the ghost that haunts my apartment. she’s nice though.”
☆ re: you enjoy fucking with people, once your relationship status was official and you two had settled, you’d post pictures of the two of you out at dinner captioned with some variation of “just a couple of besties”. abby doesn’t get the joke at all, but is happy to participate.
☆ paparazzi are constantly up your ass, and one day when you’re on what you thought was a secluded beach with abby, they snap a picture of abby kissing you along your neck, your fingers wrapped in her long blonde hair. then, someone leaked the address of the hotel you’d be staying at and you were bombarded by fans at the door. one of them screams at you “was that a picture of you and abby on the beach?”
thinking quickly on your feet, you respond “i haven’t been to the beach in years.” an obvious lie, but it sold the idea that you weren’t going to talk about it.
☆ celebrity blind items are constantly being released, revealing details of your personal life. you have no idea who on your team is running their mouth, but there were plenty of worse things that could be revealed to the public.
this A- list model was caught at the club sucking face with this rookie alliterative alphabet fighter. sources are saying they’ve been together for months, but neither are willing to confirm on or offline.
☆ finally, about a year into your relationship you and abby concoct this ridiculous hard launch for your relationship status. abby’s in las vegas for a pretty important main card fight. not a title fight, but she was still new on the scene and was trying to establish her relevance. she gets a devastating first round knockout with the nastiest punch to the jaw that you’ve seen in a minute.
the crowd is in an uproar when the announcer and her team flood the octagon. they ask the standard “how do you feel?”, “do you have anything you wanna say to the fans?”
then came the question she was waiting for. “what are you going to do once you get out of the octagon?”
“i’m gonna go call my girlfriend.” she chuckles between sharp exhales, still riding the adrenaline from the fight. “she’s the first voice i wanna hear after every fight. she couldn’t be here tonight because she’s off in milan, but i know there’s no way she missed this.”
of course you were watching. it was no secret that you were a ufc fan. you’d been caught front row in the stadium a few times. even if abby wasn’t fighting, you tried not to miss the pay per view events.
an hour later a photo was uploaded on your instagram of you holding your phone to your ear, still in your pajamas with the caption
absolutely loving milan <3
it took very little time for “WE WERE RIGHT!” to start trending on twitter.
i WILL be writing more of them don't worry. idc if only 3 people like this, more is coming :P
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The Sims 2: 20th anniversary - Gigantic Baby Costume Updated
This thing is cursed, you say? How dare you.
Since I learned how to add face morphs to meshes, I thought to myself “what better way to celebrate this anniversary than updating this classic, this piece of Sims 2 history, this iconic masterpiece by bootsbrisket?” Of course all credits go to them!
Download here: SFS / GD
Please read all the details under the cut if you want to download this!
Here’s all the changes for my version of this costume, which basically makes it so it’s actually, in fact, a real giant baby, not a costume anymore lol:
-I split this into two pieces: the body, found in fullbody outfits, and the head, found in the custom hairs section. This makes it so you’ll see the baby head on the pie menu, instead of the Sim’s head that’s wearing it underneath.
-Both pieces are available for all categories, unisex and ages range from young adult to elder.
-Added all face morphs using the original toddler face as a reference.
-Replaced the bones assignments on the body, this time using the toddler diaper outfit as a reference. Now they’ll look smoother.
-The body outfit replaces the original cc by bootsbrisket, so delete the original one if you have it. The head is a new piece of cc hair. You’ll probably find the head at the top of your custom unnatural hairs catalog, and the body buried (no pun intended) all the way at the bottom of the outfits catalog, right before the maxis clothing, due to how old the original one is.
If you want to see this thing in motion, here’s this video capture I took of them rapping while testing 🔥
Known issues:
-Due to how the Blender plugin works for the Sims 2, I haven’t been able to avoid making the head look bright in CAS. This is a sorta common issue that’s easily fixable using Milkshape3D, but again, I could only use Blender for the head mesh. Luckily, there’s Lazyduchess Overly Bright CAS fix, which I totally recommend you use to avoid this minor annoyance.
-While the eyes are fully animated and open and close as they should, the direction they look at won’t be animated. Haven’t figured out a way to implement that into a custom mesh yet.
-When the baby head opens their mouth, the nose’s Sim underneath might clip a little bit inside the mouth. Not very noticeable, but if you want to avoid this, you can make the Sim with an invisible skin like this one by MDP.
-This is something the original mesh had too: due to the size of the giant baby, there might be some clipping with itself in certain animations. Nothing too bad though I think.
And last but not least, some small tips to set up this Giant Baby character:
When the Sim wearing this goes to the shower, they’ll change into their naked adult bodies, which might look pretty creepy. Fortunately, there’s a way to make this outfit showerproof: the Never Nude trait and mod by Hexagonal Bypiramid! Change all the Sim’s outfits to the baby body, most importantly their swimwear, and place the Never Nude trait on their inventory.
Same goes for job outfits. If you want this Giant Baby to follow their dreams and pursue their professional career, they might change into something else when they go to work. For this I recommend the Job Outfit Stopinator by episims. Same as the other one, install the mod and place the object in the Sim’s inventory to prevent them from changing into job outfits.
And voila! You now have a fully functional Giant Baby Sim!
Want more screenshots of this majestic baby? Here ya go:
… Why am I taking this weird thing so seriously, you ask? Well, why wouldn’t I? I may be a little too perfectionist, even for stuff like this 🤓
Anyway, happy birthday Sims 2! 20 years and still going like a champ 🎉
God I love this game.
If you find any issues, please let me know! I have absolute Splatoon brainrot right now playing the Grand Festival 😬
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Office Hours - Chapter One
Summary:
Your colleague Dr. Ancunin is a smug condescending bastard and you can't stand him. But you also can't get him out of your head.
Pairing: Astarion/F!Reader Rating: E Word Count: 5.2k Tags/Warnings: unprotected p in v sex, creampie, no breeding kink, masturbation, vaginal fingering, vampire bites, modern au, college/university au, urban fantasy, enemies to lovers, like the briefest mention of suicide while talking about Hamlet
This would not exist without @zipzoomzaria's gorgeous glasses screenshots because PROFESSOR, PLS. Go follow her bc her edits are out of this world. The masturbation scene is also heavily inspired by @astarionfreak's "Are You Satisfied, Darling?" If you haven't read it what are you doing???
Read on AO3 ~ Masterlist
There’s something about him that rubs you the wrong way. It could be his arrogance, or the condescending way he peers over his glasses at you and your other colleagues. It might be the overpriced cashmere turtlenecks that hug his figure perfectly or the stupid silver earrings adorning his stupid elf ears. But every time he opens his pretty little mouth you feel a snarl growing deep in your throat.
This is the first university you’ve worked at where the theatre and English departments shared an office. Theatre and music, sure, even theatre and dance. But theatre and English? It feels insulting, honestly. English PhDs are some of the snobbiest people you’ve ever met, and they always speak to you like a child. Is it because they’re unimpressed by your MFA, like it made you less deserving of your position? Who knows. But Astarion Ancunin is no different.
“Grace, would you mind making twelve copies of pages 219-254 when you get a chance?” You hand the administrative assistant the heavy book. “You can leave them in my mailbox, I’ll pick them up later.” Grace opens the book to the instructed page.
“Oh, Much Ado About Nothing! I love that one!” she squeals with delight. “That Beatrice and Benedick,” she sighs, stroking the Complete Works lovingly. You smile at her cordially.
“They’re great, they’re basically the non-problematic version of Kate and Petruchio,” you respond in agreement.
“How tragic that Taming’s writing is better.”
You whirl around to see Ancunin walking in looking at something on his phone. He doesn’t even look up as he inserts himself into your conversation. You glare at his interruption. He looks up at Grace, bypassing you completely.
“Good morning, Grace darling, how are you today?” He sweeps over to her and takes her hand in his, planting a kiss on her knuckles. Gods he’s fucking insufferable. Not to mention unprofessional. Grace, however, blushes and giggles like a schoolgirl.
“I’m doing well, Dr. Ancunin, and yourself?” The tiefling’s voice jumps up about three pitches and her tail starts swishing excitedly.
“Leagues better now that I’ve been blessed with your presence,” he coos at her, voice positively saccharine. It takes every ounce of your patience to keep from rolling your eyes. He casts his gaze to you, and even you need to turn away from those piercing red eyes.
“Good morning, professor. Starting Much Ado with your students, I take it?” he asks with a light smile that makes you bristle.
“Yes, it’s a great way for them to practice switching between verse and prose,” you respond coolly, more than a little defensive.
“Of course, one of his best.” He glances down at the volume still in Grace’s hands and his eyebrows raise, peering over the top of his round glasses. “Going with the Bevington, hmm? Interesting. I’m more of a Norton man, myself.” He runs a slender finger along the binding as you grit your teeth. Is he really patronizing you over your choice of edition of Shakespeare’s Complete Works? Of course, he’s an English scholar.
“The Norton is a great tool dramaturgically, but the Bevington is a much better resource for actors, so, yes.” Your voice is steady but there’s an undeniable venom in it. Can he tell how much he’s bothering you? Probably, he’s almost certainly getting enjoyment out of riling you up. His little smirk would seem to suggest it, at least.
“Well certainly, and who knows acting resources better than our resident classical acting expert?” he intones, voice still dripping with honey. You narrow your eyes at him, unsure if he’s taking another jab at your degree.
“Well, as much as I enjoy standing around and debating the merit of various editions of the Complete Works, I’m about to be late for a meeting. Grace, thank you so much, I’ll be back later to pick up those copies. Dr. Ancunin,” you turn to his smug face and he looks back at you innocently. “A pleasure, as always.” You grab your papers and leave the office, feeling the heat of his gaze boring into the back of your head as you leave.
***
“Yes, Thaniel, come on in, have a seat,” you call out to the freshman loitering in the hallway outside your office. He comes in and drops his overfull backpack next to the teal club chair across from your desk. You close your laptop and smile at him warmly.
“So, Hamlet, that’s ambitious! I think it’s a good choice for you, but it’ll be a lot of work,” you say, glancing at your own copy of the monologue.
“Yeah, that’s why I’m here,” Thaniel says nervously. “I’m fine with the scansion and stuff, that I get, but I still don’t get the actual words. And I know you said how important that is.”
“For sure, I can guarantee all of the bad Shakespeare you’ve seen has been because the actors had no idea what they were saying. Have you used the Lexicon?” Thaniel looks off to the side, embarrassed.
“No, I don’t really get how that works either,” he says, an air of chagrin creeping into his voice.
“No worries, it takes practice. Here, we’ll do a few lines together. So first off, to be or not to be, that’s fairly obvious, right?”
“Yeah, he’s talking about suicide, right?”
“Sure, but what is he actually saying about it? To take arms against a sea of troubles/And by opposing, end them. What’s ‘them’ referring to?”
“The sea of troubles?”
“Right, the aforementioned slings and arrows. So even though you might know what those words mean individually, look them up in the Lexicon to see if they have a different context here. But you’re right, he’s trying to figure out if it’s better to suffer through the shittiness of existence or to take your fate into your own hands and, well, end them.” You highlight the line and lean over your desk to show Thaniel. A voice pipes up from the doorway.
“That’s not exactly what he’s saying, you know.”
The paper crumples in your hand slightly as your fist instinctively tightens. You plaster a strained smile on your face and look up at him.
“Dr. Ancunin, thank you for gracing us with your presence. Care to elaborate?”
He’s leaning in the doorway, arms crossed, face in shadows. Your office is unusually dark because of the storm outside, and so the bright fluorescents in the hallway give him an almost ethereal halo effect
“It’s a common misconception that Hamlet is contemplating suicide here. Life and death, sure, but ‘to take arms’ isn’t metaphorical, it’s literal. He’s contemplating dying as a result of killing Claudius, not taking his own life,” he says, almost sounding bored. You stand abruptly, your office chair skidding backwards.
“How can that possibly be true? He says ‘to take arms against a sea of troubles.’ He’s using the active voice, deciding whether or not to continue his life or end it. To be or not to be. It’s the first line in the monologue. He’s not talking about the consequences of killing Claudius.” You try to keep your voice from shaking. You know that you don't sound nearly as eloquent as him, and it’s pissing you off. He shrugs nonchalantly.
“You’re oversimplifying it, it’s exceedingly more complicated than that. The whole soliloquy is filled with war imagery. He’s at war with himself, the part of him that wants to kill Claudius and the part of him that is afraid to die.” He pushes himself off the door frame and steps back into the hallway. “But apologies, please don’t let me interrupt your instruction.” And like that he was off, leaving you to stew in silence. Thaniel looks up at you and looks back at the doorway where he stood.
“Should I…” he starts, but you cut him off with a wave of your hand.
“Dr. Ancunin comes at this from a very different angle as an English academic. He’s more interested in the words on the page, rather than how they translate to the stage. But,” you sigh, loathe to give him any credit, “it’s a valid interpretation. We can go down that route, if you want, or we can look at it through this lens.” Thaniel chews his lip while he considers his options.
“I think what you said makes more sense, the suicide bit,” he finally decides. You nod and pull out your copies of the Shakespeare Lexicon.
“Great, let’s go over how to use the Lexicon again,” you say as you flip through the book, looking for the entry for ‘slings.’
***
You drop off your bag and toss your keys into a bowl on the counter. Fucking exhausting day. You unzip your boots and kick them vaguely in the direction of the shoe rack, stretching and curling your toes for relief. You hang up your wet coat and shake rain from your hair. Your eyes dart between the refrigerator, wherein resides a bottle of white wine, and the bathroom door, contemplating how good a hot bath would feel. Both? Both is good.
You pour yourself a generous glass of Riesling and strip your clothes on your way to the bathroom. One of the perks of living alone. Sitting naked on the edge of the tub, you sip your wine as the bath fills.
Fucking Ancunin.
You’re a little shocked at how much he got under your skin today. Normally you don’t think twice about him, excepting the few times you have the misfortune of passing him in the hallway. But today the fates decided to throw you together and your schedules aligned. Well, in your defense, you didn’t seek him out that second time, he was the one who decided to crash your office hours.
You don’t even like Hamlet that much. You certainly don’t care about alternative interpretations of “To be or not to be.” But you’re mostly annoyed because he had a fair point. His read makes Hamlet a more interesting character rather than a cowardly incel romanticizing suicide.
You slide into the bath, hissing slightly as the hot water flows over your chilled skin. Without prompting, Ancunin worms his way back into your thoughts. Hmmph. You take a gulp of wine to try to wash away the taste of the unpleasant image.
Well… not entirely unpleasant. He’s a good looking man, you’d be a fool to deny it. But gods he’s so smug. And interrupting your meeting with Thaniel was wildly inappropriate. Leaning your head against the edge of the tub, you try to focus your thoughts elsewhere. You’re not about to let him interrupt you again, and when he’s not even present, no less.
But there he is, in your mind, crimson eyes looking over the top of those metal frame glasses that you’re, like, 99% sure he doesn’t actually need to see. You take another swig of wine to drown his stupid face. With his stupid cheekbones. And his dumb fucking earrings that you want to bite.
Nine hells, what is happening? You’ve been drinking your wine quickly and aren’t thinking straight. You grab your phone and open Spotify, letting your daily mix play through the bluetooth speaker on the counter.
Now Playing: Hatefuck by The Bravery.
If I put my hands around your wrists, would you fight them?
If I put my fingers in your mouth, would you bite them?
By Mystra’s fucking grace, seriously? You growl at the growing heat between your legs. Between putting off dinner and chugging your wine, your head is swimming. You might be better off getting it out of your system.
The wine glass hits the tub edge with a clank as you angrily put it down and sink into the water up to your chin. You are satiating a purely physical need, nothing else.
You still shiver as you slip your hand between your legs, lightly running your finger up your slit. You can see his face, looking down on you through those glasses - those infuriating glasses - and your lips flutter. What does he look like under those sweaters? He’s so thin, but his clothes fit incredibly well. It’s not hard to imagine a sculpted body beneath. You spread your legs further and let the warm water tickle your folds.
His silvery curls would look so good between your legs, slender fingers wrapped around your thighs while he laps you up. At least then he’d shut up. A gentle moan escapes your lips as you run your finger along your inner lips, pretending it’s him. You could grab hold of those perfect locks, yanking on them to control where he can go, fucking his face.
You move your other hand up to your breast and start teasing your nipple, feeling his lips around it. You give it a little tug and groan, just like if he nipped at it.
You imagine sitting on his pretty face, pointed ears flushed and hair a mess. Your hips buck into your hand as they might on top of him and your toes curl. You make gentle circles around your clit, thinking of all the other uses for his silver tongue. You whine and squirm at the sensations of heat radiating through your body. You slip a finger inside and hiss as you can see his pale digits entering you in your mind’s eye. You curl it upwards and gasp, his imaginary eyes looking up at you through those long lashes and a smirk playing across his imaginary lips.
“Are you ready for more of me, darling?” You can hear him murmur into your ear.
“Yes, gods yes,” you reply breathlessly into the cold bathroom air. You slide another finger in and feel that delicious stretch. The ghost of him moans, coming undone at the sight of you. You could leave him speechless, for once.
You reach over the edge of the tub and grab the box of waterproof toys. You frantically sift through your collection of dildos, trying to find the right one. Here. It’s long and svelte like the rest of him, but bright shimmery purple. You suction it to the bottom of the tub and hover above it on your knees. It sways lightly in the water, tip of it teasing your pussy just like you’d love to do to him.
Gods, to see him beg for your cunt. To see him reduced to a babbling mess, pleading to let him inside you. Your breath quickens at the mental image of him pulling on his own hair waiting for you to satisfy him. You sink down onto the dildo and your groan of pleasure mirrors what you’d like to hear from him.
You start sliding yourself on the purple dick, feeling its ridges glide against the walls of your cunt as you continue to finger your clit. You imagine your hand splayed across his chest, your black nails standing in contrast against his pale skin. You claw at the bottom of the tub as you increase your pace, desperate to see the pink raised skin that your nails leave behind. The fingers on your clit speed up as well, and you can feel yourself getting close.
“Oh gods, Astarion, don’t stop,” the words tumble from your mouth unbidden. You will absolutely hate yourself for that later, but right now all that matters is your ecstasy. You bounce atop the dildo, disregarding the water that splashes over the side of the tub as you chase your finish. Your moans increase in pitch and fervor as the various images of him in all sorts of positions flash through your mind. Between your thighs, sitting on his face, riding his dick, even fucking pegging him from behind because why the hell not?
“Astarion!” You cry out his name as you crash over the edge, legs shaking and pussy pulsing. Your orgasm reverberates throughout your whole body as you ride it out. Eventually, your movement slows and the water gently sways around you. You look down at your hand, milky juices swirling in the now tepid tub water.
Shit.
***
The next day at work, you avoid him like the plague. You keep your office door closed, usually an unthinkable act but entirely necessary right now. You double check the hallway before leaving to go teach, and then after class you immediately duck back into your office and close the door again. You even avoid the main office for fear of running into him there.
You can’t look at his face right now. You can’t possibly look him in the eye.
When 5:00 rolls around, you glance out into the hallway. Most of the other professors are leaving. To play it safe, you decide to work until 6 so that you can be sure that he’s gone when you leave. You absentmindedly grade performance responses. After you’ve read one paragraph about Miss Julie maybe a half dozen times, you realize that it’s probably time to go.
You slowly open the door and glance out into the hallway. You can’t tell from this angle if his door is open or not. You grab your bag and coat, take a deep breath, and make a beeline for the stairs. As you approach his office you realize it’s open.
Fuck.
It’s fine. You’ll just walk past it and get to the parking lot and then you won’t need to worry about it. He might not even be in there. Or if he is, he probably has his head down and won’t notice you walk by. It’s fine. You’ve got this.
“Oh, professor, a word?” His voice floats into the hallway right as you’re passing his door. Are you fucking kidding? You turn to see him sitting at his desk, head down, writing something. He doesn’t even look up at you. Prick.
“Yes?” you ask, not budging from your spot in the hall. He glances up at you over his glasses. Those fucking glasses. You want to rip them off his face and throw them out the window.
“Do you have a moment? I think we need to talk.” His voice is low and cool. Does he fucking know? There’s no way he can know.
Right?
You tentatively take a step into his office. It’s surprisingly cluttered for a man who always looks so put together, but it’s still warm and inviting. You can barely see the walls for being covered corner to corner in bookshelves full to bursting. He’s got a big mahogany desk in the middle of the room - significantly nicer than the university-issued one. It’s covered in stacks of papers, books, weird little knick knacks; it’s amazing how he’s able to get anything done on it. There are two chairs facing his desk, much like yours, but a rich plush velvet instead of a scratchy cotton weave. He’s got a scent diffuser somewhere, giving the room an aroma like an earthy spiced tea.
“Have a seat,” he says, gesturing to the cushy red chairs across from him. You stand there, clutching your bag, staring at him like a deer in the headlights. When he realizes you’re not going to sit, he gets up and crosses over to the door.
“Do you mind if I close this? It’s… a bit embarrassing,” he asks with a crooked smile. You can feel the heat in your cheeks rising. Your mouth goes dry and you try to swallow the lump forming in your throat.
There’s no way he knows.
Right?
But something compels you to nod, so he closes the door and walks back to his desk, but rather than sitting behind it, he leans back casually on the front of it. He’s taken off the blazer he usually wears and is down to just the turtleneck, sleeves pushed up just below his elbows. He crosses his arms in front of his chest as you stare, waiting.
“I wanted to… apologize. For yesterday.”
You blink at him, the conversation not going in the direction you expected. You had been so focused on yourself, that it took you a moment to realize what he was referring to.
“It was inappropriate to barge in on your meeting with your student. You were mid-instruction, and I needn’t have inserted myself into your conversation.” He leaned back on his hands, stretching out his lean figure to impossible proportions. The grip on your bag slackened and you couldn’t help but drag your gaze over the length of his body. He looks at you quizzically.
“I get the sense that you don’t very much like me,” he muses.
Now it’s his turn to give you the once-over, and you feel practically naked before him the way he looks at you. “Then again,” he adds, and pushes himself off his desk. He slowly advances toward you, though whether like someone approaching a vicious beast or a predator stalking its prey, it’s unclear. You retreat while holding his gaze until your back is flush against the door.
No escape now.
He gets precariously close to you and takes an unsettling whiff. When he speaks again, his voice is a husky growl.
“I think it’s entirely possible you like me… quite a bit.” He’s got at least a half foot on you, and he looks down on you with heavy-lidded eyes. The heat in your face has fully reached the tips of your ears now, and your breath comes out ragged.
“I’m sure I-” you start, but it comes out thick and raspy. You clear your throat and try again. “I’m sure I don't know what you mean,” you finally manage with all of the composure you can muster. He cocks an eyebrow at you, then slowly takes off those infuriating glasses.
“No? Then perhaps I’m mistaken, and your heart rate hasn’t increased by approximately 20 beats per second in the past few minutes.” His eyes continue boring into you. “And maybe that smell between your legs is completely unrelated.”
An undignified splutter comes out of you as you press your thighs closer together. He takes a half step back to let you respond.
“If I am indeed mistaken, then I’ve said my peace and you’re free to go.” The seductive honey is gone from his voice, and in its place is a politely professional tone. You fully feel that he’s giving you an out, that you can both laugh on this as an embarrassing moment and neither will bring it up ever again.
But on the other hand…
“You’re not mistaken,” you choke out in a whisper. The lazy smile is back and he lifts your chin with his index finger.
“What was that? Speak up.” His command weakens your knees and you wither under his gaze.
“You’re not wrong,” you say more boldly, trying to meet his energy. His smile broadens, and for the first time you notice two pointy fangs slip out beneath his upper lip.
Fucking
vampire??
That explains how he could track your heartbeat, and even more his ridiculously keen sense of smell. Doesn’t make it any less humiliating.
“No, I don’t suppose I am,” he snarls and suddenly he’s kissing you roughly, hands twisting in your hair and one knee sliding up between your legs. He pushes you against the door and lifts you off your feet slightly. You’re desperate just to keep up as he devours you, hands weakly grasping at his hips, shoulders, neck. But he’s fully in control of the kiss, and after a moment you let him take you.
He breaks the kiss but doesn’t pull away, and you’re both breathing heavily, air cycling between your lungs. Your head feels full of a thick fog and you can’t fully see straight. His hands are still in your hair, tight but not pulling - yet. You get the sense that might not last long.
He drops to his knees and you nearly double over from the sudden lack of support. He runs his nose and lips across the hem of your black denim skirt, inhaling again. Your fingers lace into his hair, but not even remotely in the dominant way from your fantasy. At this point you’re just trying not to collapse.
He looks up at you, flashing another fang-bearing grin. His hand slips up your skirt and his thumb runs across your pussy, barricaded by your sheer tights and panties.
“Darling, you’re positively soaked,” he hums contentedly. “You’d have a hard time hiding this from anyone.” You bite your lower lip, trying to keep the needy whines at bay. But when he fiercely rips the crotch of your tights and presses the flat of his tongue against the drenched gusset, you can’t stop the cry from escaping your throat. He sucks lasciviously, the debauched slurping noise ringing in your ears. Your knees buckle and he grabs hold of your hips, hiking your skirt up to your waist to get better access to your dripping cunt.
He stands and kisses you again, the taste of you lingering on
his lips. He grabs your ass and digs his fingers into your flesh, spreading them until you gasp into his kiss. In one fluid motion he sweeps up your legs and wraps them around his waist, carrying you over to that incredible mahogany desk.
He plops you down on the hardwood and you hear books and papers tumbling onto the floor behind you. He presses his bulge into your mound, this time the sound of both of your moans mingling pleasingly. He tears at your chiffon button down, trailing hungry kisses down your chest as you throw your head back in pleasure. He makes quick work of fully removing your top, though you’re certain he sacrificed some buttons in the process. You hardly care as you paw wantonly at the back of his neck, desperate for him to get his lips onto every single inch of you. He pulls the lace cup of your bra down with his teeth and starts sucking on your nipple, pressing his hand into the small of your back. You arch into him, his hands working you like a soft clay.
So much for the pleading mess that you pictured last night. Instead, you’re the one who's been reduced to shambles, begging for satisfaction.
“Puh-please,” you stutter, and those devilish eyes lock onto yours again. He snakes his way back up your chest and bites your lower lip.
“Puh-please what?” he mocks your stammering, but makes up for it when he rolls his hips forward, dragging that delicious hardness against you. You squirm, trying to pull him closer but he’s got your arms locked in his grip. His lips leave yours and ghost over the flesh of your neck. He very gently scrapes his fangs across your jugular, eliciting a ghoulish moan from you in return. By all the gods, you hadn’t even considered that as a part of it. His movement made it clear that he won’t bite unless you want him to.
But holy hells do you want him to.
“Gods Astarion,” you gasp, and you swear you can feel his cock twitch at the sound of his own name. “Fuck me then bite me, or the other way around I don’t care, but please get in me!” The string of words almost sounds foreign to your own ears, but you’re well beyond the point of trying to sound clever. In an instant, he’s undone his belt buckle and his erection springs forth, bouncing and already dripping precum. He roughly shoves your panties to the side and sinks his cock and teeth into you simultaneously, drawing out your cry of both pain and pleasure. You wrap your legs and arms around him, trying to pull him in deeper. You can feel his mouth filling up with your hot blood just as your cunt fills up with his dick.
You’re panting as you grow more lightheaded, clinging to his neck. Unthinkingly, your fingers stroke his ears, playing with those tiny silver hoops. He lurches and pulls away from your neck, looking absolutely feral with your blood dripping down his chin, which only sets you off more. You angle your hips toward him, trying to get him to start thrusting into you. He pushes your back down onto the desk and hooks his elbows beneath your knee high boots. Then he starts pounding into you properly, and you feel like you’re close to losing it. You grab onto the edge of the desk as he revs up his pace, his cock stretching you out as he keeps your legs close to your ears. You can feel the heat mounting in your core and you know it won’t be long before you come. But at this point you’re just trying to hold on for dear life.
“Fuck, gods, Astarion, I’m-” You finish before your sentence does. He doesn’t relent as the orgasm wracks your body, if anything, he fucks you harder. Just as you’ve barely come down off your climax, he pulls out and yanks you off the desk, spins you around and pushes your face down into the smooth mahogany, warmed from where you had just been. He enters you again, this time from behind, and already you’re working your way up to a second one. Your bare tits squish against the polished surface and he grabs your hair, pulling your head up and arching your back into him.
For the first time you notice the mirror on the opposite wall across from his desk. But rather than both of you, you only see yourself, disheveled and well-fucked, lips swollen from his abuse. Your hair is pulled up by an invisible force behind you. Another unexpected aspect of vampire fucking.
You desperately wish you could see his face because you can feel his thrusts getting more uneven and erratic. You try to turn to get a glimpse of him, but his grip on your hair remains tight. But even if you can’t see him, you can hear him, his grunts and the low string of incoherent swears pouring out of his mouth. The sound of him getting lost in you is enough, and your own moans start building and mixing with his, an utter symphony of epicurism.
His hips give a few more broken thrusts and you can feel his climax, setting off yours. The throbs of his cock match those wracking your cunt, and you hold onto the edge of the desk as the waves wash over you. Once they’ve come to an end he pulls out, and you can feel his semen dripping out of the sudden emptiness and running down your leg. You quietly say a thankful prayer for your IUD.
You’re both panting as he collapses onto your back, planting a half-hearted kiss on your spine. You weakly push yourself up off the desk and see the devastation of papers, smears and fluids. You turn yourself around and relish in his appearance. Your blood is splattered on his fine cream sweater, his usually perfectly coiffed curls damp and sticking to his forehead. You reach up and wipe the remainder of your blood off his chin. He smirks and kisses you, significantly more gently this time.
“That was good,” you murmur through steadying breaths, “but next time, keep the fucking glasses on.”
#astarion#astarion fanfic#astarion fic#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate iii#baldurs gate astarion#baldurs gate fanfiction#astarion ancunin#astarion smut#baldurs gate smut#fanfiction#smut#professor astarion#astarion x reader#astarion x you#office hours
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gifts (h.h)
so! i found this tik tok, and i instantly had the idea of gifting it to one of the members 🫢 i hope you guys really like this!! 🩷
feedback is greatly appreciated 🥰
“Have you figured out what you're getting Hyunjin for his birthday?” Felix asks you while the two of you sit on his couch. He's scrolling through his phone, trying to find the perfect gift to give his hyung.
You feel your cheeks blush, and you reply with a quiet, “yeah.” Your friend glances towards you, a little surprised you already have an idea.
“Wait, really? What'd you get him?” He questions excitingly, shifting his position to face you.
“I got him a customized necklace,” you tell him. You grab your phone, unlocking it before clicking on your camera roll. You click on the screenshot, feeling a bit embarrassed to show him.
You turn the phone to show him, watching Felix's face for a reaction. His dark eyes widen, and his lips part in surprise. “Oh, no way!?” He almost squeals, grabbing your phone.
“I saw it on tik tok, and I thought he would like it,” you explain to Felix, tucking some hair behind your ears. “Do you think he'll like it?”
He stutters over his words while looking at you in disbelief. “Will he like it? Noona, I'm sure he'll love it!” Felix mentions with a chuckle, combing his fingers through his hair.
You grin, feeling a bit better about your gift decision. You really wanted to get him something sensual this year, and you're glad to find out it was a good choice.
“I've seen all the sketches he has of you, so I'm one hundred percent sure he'll love this. Plus, he loves wearing necklaces,” Felix continues to reassure you while handing you your phone again.
“I'm excited to see how he'll react,” you giggle, fiddling with the tips of your fingers.
“Record it and send it to me,” he laughs, tipping his head back. “I need to see how he reacts.”
More laughs leave your lips, and you nod in agreement. “I'll try my best to record it for you,” you tell him, patting his leg.
Before either of you can say anything else, the door to Felix's apartment opens. You cast your gaze towards it, the smile on your lips widening as your boyfriend walks in.
“Speak of the devil,” you nudge Felix before standing up. “Hi, Hyunie!”
Hyunjin's gaze meets yours, a smile instantly coming to his plump lips. “My angel,” he grins, kicking his shoes off before meeting you halfway.
His arms wrap around your shoulders, pulling you into his chest. You circle your arms around his waist, gently rubbing his back. You can feel him press a kiss on the top of your head.
“How was your schedule?” You ask while resting your head on his chest.
You both pull away from each other, following him into the kitchen. “It was good. I missed you, though,” Hyunjin pouts, looking back at you.
Your heart flutters in your chest as you lean against the counter, watching him get a drink from the fridge. He returns your gaze while chugging half of the water bottle. He gives you a wink, causing you to giggle and look away.
“You're cute, angel,” Hyunjin says after recapping his bottle.
“Shut up,” you joke.
He steps closer to you, reaching out to grip your waist. Hyunjin pulls you closer to him before landing a quick kiss on your lips. A hum vibrates in your throat as you kiss him back, gripping his shirt.
“I love you,” Hyunjin whispers, nudging his nose on yours.
You smile and rest your forehead on his. “I love you, too,” you whisper back, moving to kiss his cheek. “I have something for you.”
He raises a brow while taking a step back, curious to what you mean. You grab his hand, lacing your fingers together before leading him towards his bedroom.
Once the two of you are in Hyunjin's room, you shut the door behind you. When you arrived earlier, you placed the neatly wrapped gift on his bed. His eyes immediately find it, and he looks towards you.
“What's this?” Hyunjin asks, slowly sitting on the edge of his bed.
“It's your birthday present,” you giggle, clasping your hands together. He looks between you and the small gift, looking a bit confused as to why he's getting it now. “Felix mentioned that you guys won't be here on your birthday, so I thought I'd give it to you now.”
“Oh, angel, you didn't have to get me anything,” he mumbles, pouting slightly.
You slip your phone out of your pocket, starting a video as he begins to unwrap it. “I wanted to,” you giggle.
Hyunjin carefully rips the wrapping paper, setting it next to him as he comes face to face with a velvety box. You watch his brows furrow as he slowly opens the navy blue box.
His jaw drops first, a light gasp escaping his throat. “Angel…” Hyunjin trails off, his cheeks blushing.
The necklace you gifted him has a sketch of you in lingerie, a picture you took just for this occasion. “Turn it over,” you mention, leaning on your toes to look as well.
Hyunjin flips it over, and he bites his bottom lip. “Mine, huh?” He asks with a smirk, lifting his gaze to look at you.
You stop the video, shoving your phone back into your pocket while walking over to him. “It’s true, isn't it?” You ask with a smirk of your own.
He scoots back a bit before patting his lap, signaling for you to straddle him. You rest your hands on his shoulders while placing your knees on either side of him.
“It is. I absolutely love it, angel,” Hyunjin mentions with a kiss.
Your fingers comb through his short hair, pushing his bangs out of his eyes. “Yeah? You do?” You ask in a whisper, knowing the gift is kinda risky for his line of work.
He removes it from the box before handing it to you. “Of course I do,” He reassures you, grinning at you. “I love anything you get me. Put it on for me?”
“Okay,” you mumble quietly, relieved that he really likes it. You grab the necklace from his hands, unclasping the ends.
Hyunjin wraps his arms around you, dipping his fingers beneath your shirt. Your heart pounds against your chest as you lean forward, clasping the necklace again.
“This is a great view,” Hyunjin laughs, his face pressed against your breasts. You playfully roll your eyes and lean back to your original position.
“Such a perv,” you giggle, lightly slapping his chest. Your eyes glance down at the necklace, thinking of how well it looks on him.
“I'll never take this off,” Hyunjin whispers as he gently takes the pendent and hides it under his shirt. “And, it's for my eyes only.”
Your cheeks blush, and he leans forward to kiss your reddened cheek. “Happy early birthday, my love,” you tell him, returning the kiss.
~
tagging: @strawboorybunny @reddesert-healourblues @spacegirlstuff @moon0fthenight @foxinnie8 @like-a-diamondinthesky @prettymiye0n
#stray kids#stray kids imagines#stray kids imagine#stray kids x reader#stray kids x you#stray kids x y/n#stray kids fanfiction#stray kids fanfic#stray kids fic#stray kids fluff#stray kids drabbles#stray kids scenarios#skz scenarios#skz drabbles#skz fluff#skz x y/n#skz x you#skz x reader#skz imagine#skz imagines#hwang hyunjin#hwang hyunjin imagines#hwang hyunjin imagine#hwang hyunjin scenarios#hwang hyunjin x y/n#hwang hyunjin x you#hwang hyunjin x reader#hwang hyunjin fanfiction#hwang hyunjin fanfic#hwang hyunjin fic
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Daniil why would you say that???
Watching Pathologic (classic HD) while on break from suffering in Pathologic 2, and it really struck me how different the first meeting with the Bachelor was in each game.
Pathologic 1, well, only a screenshot can do it justice,
(Yes . . . far be it from me to call myself a person of mystical inclinations. However, when I look at you, I get the feeling that nature is playing jokes on us. It is as if both the left and right hand have clutched the head to realize for the first time they are two parts of a single whole.
>Why?
>I get that feeling too. Does that mean that we are alike?)
That's like the first thing he says to the Haruspex, and while yeah everybody in Pathologic talks like that to a degree, even in game, in character that's a wild thing for Dankovsky specifically to say.
We just spent an entire playthrough as this guy mocking and/or having breakdowns over the existence of the supernatural - especially precognition. And in strolls this 6'2 resting murder-face dude with half-a-medical degree, widely thought to be a serial killer (kinda true), and Dankovsky's like,
"BTW, my heart is telling me we're kinda two halves of the same whole.😊❤️"
Absolutely hilarious. Even funnier is that the Haruspex, grumpy at baseline and currently having the worst day of his life (so far), can agree with him. Great first impression all around!
Then over in Pathologic 2, the Bachelor is high-key fumbling, like fumbling so hard you can get an achievement for it.
Carpetbagger - Remind a colleague of the Hippocratic Oath -- and fail
Not to meme on the guy (who is of course, multi-faceted and at his core deeply altruistic even if he often seems to have trouble expressing that on an individual basis), but initial Pathologic 2 Bachelorencounter is Daniel at his most prickly prick.
He gets Artemy's name wrong (possibly on purpose and definitely twice),
condescendingly demands the Haruspex be his errand boy,
basically calls himself the smartest person in a room of 2,
and can accidentally imply that he left a couple of orphan children to die because he doesn't treat mutts (he actually refused to treat the orphans' dogs).
Yikes - no wonder Artmey spends the first couple of Days taking cheap shots at the guy.
I mean in both Haruspex routes eventually he ends up very friendly with the Bachelor, which makes senses on a thematic level given the some of the Haruspex's major themes/ideals are connection and community. You could say their first meeting was changed to be funnier ("Vorakh") or more in character for the expected tension between two people under a lot of stress who can both be difficult to get along with at baseline
However, what about if we look at it from a meta-narrative level?
While you can play Pathologic 1 as either the Bachelor or the Haruspex on your initial run, it's pretty common knowledge who you are supposed to play first.
"Daniil Danokovsky's Fun Steppe Vacation was just the tutorial for Artemy Burakh's Tormentous Nightmare" - HBomberguy in Pathologic is Genius and Here's Why
This means that the player in Pathologic 1 has already been introduced to Daniil - even if Artmey hasn't - and the game reflects that! You the player know the Bachelor, you've been him, and you probably got really attached after keeping him alive for 12 horrible, horrible days.
Even though you know he can be a bit sanctimonious and dismissive, the player knows he's rational and compassionate and thus already used the evidence at hand to figure out Artemy hasn't killed anybody!
Of course one of the first things you (the player) would want to do as the new protagonist is check on your former avatar, and the game rewards you for it! Talking with the Bachelor on Day 1 as Artemy can raise your reputation - which is super critical. It might be the increase that keeps you from getting hunted in the streets or starving as shops refuse to sell food. What a great first (Second?) impression!!
Daniil's unprompted "hey are we soulmates or is it just me?" line is funny, but meta-narratively it is also true. They are the player's first two avatars, taking turns being puppeted by the same you as protagonists through the same overall story to two opposing conclusions. They are (your) right and left hand. You've played Dankovsky, (you) know this and having previously been the protagonist this new Dankovsky seems to subliminally know this too.
Meanwhile over in Pathologic 2, the only route is the Haruspex - disregarding the Marble Nest (worst day of Dankovsky's life [so far, ad infintuum]) which has enough time fuckery going on that I shall disregard it for this analysis - you can only be Artemy Burakh.
Either under the assumption that the player of Pathologic 2 hasn't played Pathologic 1 or that they've played all of Pathologic 1 including Changeling' Route's extended murder hide and seek between Dankovsky and Burakh, We (the player and Artemy) don't know Daniil when we meet him in Pathologic 2 as anything but the broken man we saw in the depressing into.
Is he our friend this time? Is he our enemy? Whatever he is, he's certainly a sanctimonious prick.
(Today's tragedy won't be the last. I was blessed with a naturally high intelligence, and my observations indicate that a very deadly visitor has come to this god-forsaken town. That's all I can say for now.
>...I don't like you, Bachelor Whatever.)
In Pathologic 2, both the player and Artmey meet Daniil Dankovsky at at his worst, and slowly work-up from there because both of us are meeting, getting to know, and building a relationship with him for the first time.
This is actually parallel to how you first meet the Haruspex in Pathologic 1 as the Bachelor!
If you are playing in the intended order, both the player and Daniil don't know anything about Artmey besides the serial killer rumors, and likewise you meet him at his worst - (in prison and later he murders a young woman to get Daniil the infected heart he needs to try and develop a vaccine). Much like we see the worst of Daniil's classism, arrogance, and inability to connect beyond quid pro quo (hehe, latin) in our Patho2 intro; in Patho1 we initially only see Artemy's standoffishness, brutality, and stubbornness.
Interestingly, following Daniil's themes/ideals of transcendence and rationality we (the player and Daniil) don't actually end up connecting much with Artmey on the Bachelor's route. The player is influenced by the puppet, and why would Dr. Daniil Dankovsky - whose route is plagued by betrayal, manipulation, and the difficulty of connecting to even people who do selflessly care for him (like Eva) - make friends with a violent, possibly dangerous guy who practices a sort of medicine Dankovsky doesn't believe in?
(I couldn't find a good screenshot for this, but mentally insert a picture of Artemy doing a roadside dissection)
Basically if Daniil is the player's protagonist he won't reach out, because in-character why would he?
If Artemy is the player's protagonist, Daniil will try to be friends in Patho1 (because of the player's previous actions affecting both avatars) or in Patho2 Artmey will eventually connect with him because that's in-character for him.
Overall, I suppose this means that Danii's instant and uncharacteristic buddy-buddy attitude with Artemy on the Haruspex route Patho1 is completely justified from a meta-textually narrative, as is his horrific fumbling in Patho2.
And it is also very, very funny.
#Pathologic#Pathologic 2#daniil dankovsky#artemy burakh#TLDR: You (the player) are making your former favorite and current favorite doll bestest friends#No idea what any of this implies for the changeling's route#this isn't really a shipping post but u could take it that way#long post#pathologic spoilers
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A Christmas Beneath Heaven | React | Days: 1, 2, & 3
Alright ya'll let's see if I can get myself back into the swing of things with this christmas event which has me all over the place so far lmao.
It's funny how the plot is this cold that causes MC to be overly horny because I'm recovering from the flu and all I felt was p a i n and n o s l e e p
I've been liking the format that I've been doing my reacts lately as I think it's a little easier to read? (Ya'll let me know if it is or isn't or no change)
Summary, Screenshots with unhinged reactions, recap and what I think so far
So let's jump in with that!!
What's going AWN?!
We're in Gehenna for Christmas once again, and this time it seems the decor is more traditional to Earth standards instead of what they did in the angel cards.
MC keeps running off somewhere and it's pretty much confusing everyone. There's a point where Leraye and Paimon suspect it's a bathroom issue and Leraye says some crazy stuff like???
Leraye apparently doesn't mind if MC were to go to the bathroom in front of him or fart in front of him and Paimon shuts him up by saying don't reveal your kinks <3 So confirmed Leraye is that boyfriend you can go to the bathroom while he's showering or brushing his teeth. (see screencaps below for receipts)
Well, the matter of the fact is that MC is running off to the bathroom but it's not for that. It's because they literally have to jack off as if they're going through a second puberty (honestly I don't remember being horny in my adolescence at all....I was annoyed by everyone else being horny lmaoooo)
Like we're talkin' there's a scene where they rush off to a bathroom in Hades to touch themselves (in detail) and they can sense Foras is in the bathroom (he is)
MC tries to relieve the issue by visiting different devils, I'm talking like bouncing off to every country to get their mind off it. Eligos, Stolas, Vassago, Morax...it doesn't help at all because they're finding something erotic about them in every way.
MC decides to take it upon themselves to find a sage to help figure out what's wrong with them. And well when we get to who it is??? It's fucking Jjyu in a poorly disguised costume. I cannot make this up like you can tell it's him and it's so funny.
So, facts are his full name is Jjyursei. He only works 9-5 as Belial's voice (does Belial know that? lmao) and he's a part-time sage. Crazy. And he was being so rude as per usual I'm just like....you're the size of a trinket/candy I can flick you across this room.
It's also revealed by Jjyu that MC has been hella touchy, rubbing up on the nobles during battles but it's not like anyone minds it because it helps with "morale" (what kinda bs....LMAO i'm sorry I was expecting them to be focused while fighting) and that seems "normal" but MC swears this is different than before.
So he gives them a thermometer to stuck up their ass, and they are literally losing their mind doing that. They also had to spit in a jar, take off their sock, and Jjyu was smelling the thermometer (W H A T) The results are...their desire is off the charts indicating a "hell christmas cold"
So another cool fact: A devil's first time masturbating generates 100C of heat, first time they have sex it's 200C of heat, MC is currently at 800C (gawd damn, like if that much heat is generated I wonder what keeps MC from burning up having sex unless it's regulated to where it doesn't hurt them)
So Jjyu calls a meeting and all hell is breaking loose lmao. Beel even showed up. (Lucifer did not, probably had something better to do) And after getting glared at and nearly jumped, Jjyu explains that MC has caught the Christmas Cold. Beleth doesn't know what that is (bless him) and Sitri explains that it affects humans much differently, because if it was rampant on Earth it wouldn't just affect sexual desires but other unsavory desires (think: THE PURGE).
Naturally, everyone is trying to figure out what to do to save MC, but there's another matter that gets brought up. Mammon wants to fucking buy the thermometer that was in MC's ass. 💀💀💀💀
Satan is pissed off, saying he's not letting that happen because it's Gehenna property (we know the real reason Satan but it's not like he's lying lol) Levi is upset because he thinks this is interfering with him getting proper context. Beel agrees with Levi and Asmodeus is over here like "oh let's make this a threesome <3"
Asmo. pls.
Belphie oddly is being serious when he wakes up to mention that he's never seen anyone get it. This being true because devils don't repress their desires, but MC has been? (I find that hard to believe based on events...)
(Also some of ya'll may have noticed a pronoun mix up but Satan refers to fem!MC as "that guy") Satan though does bring up that he has to remind MC to give in to their desires, and that's indeed true. We see it happen. So perhaps MC does repress enough for the christmas cold to be that bad.
BUT there's someone else who had it. Solomon himself! He caught it when he first arrived in Hell and it was bad, but it cleared up for him. Beel suddenly orders Bael to go find the devil that treated Solomon and to bring him back (poor Bael)
So now MC is being held in a quaratine room. There's nobles watching them, and apparently MC has been masturbating so much they lost weight. Also, they can't see the nobles through the one-way glass but they can see them....so yeah when MC starts up their self-play the nobles have a front row seat. WHATS CRAZIER is that they start masturbating too????? HELLO??????? (idk to me that's kinda hot not knowing that they're watching)
Also, Sitri being shown to be the favorite....MC is like "I wanna finger his hole" and Sitri is out here about to bust down doors to get in there and Beleth stops him lol (NO LIKE he was literally about to tear things apart to get in that room)
AND now it appears that Bael has found the devil that treated Solomon. WHICHHHHHH we get to see on day 4~
SCREENCAP TIME
They are so damn cute, Paimon likes scritching Ppyong on the belly and I'm like yeahhhh when Juno's around they probs fuckkkkk~
Leraye not beating the allegations of having a bodily function kink....maybe even a fart kink (that's real btw and I've heard of folks making content for it 💀)
First, the bathroom in Hades look nice asf. Second, when I said in detail??? Yeah this is for fem!MC btw even the masturbating descriptions. MC is down bad like?
Yup his freaky ass was there watching lmao. He did say he was always gonna know what MC is doing and I bet he was having a hard time not jacking off
Satan being like-
He hates being interrupted or ignored so I can just hear him being irritated lmao
Eligos the bby~ seeing how he reacts to being touched on his head means he probably gets going by intimate soft touches. He was being so sweet <3 (even though MC was fucking HAVING A NOSEBLEED ALL OVER THE PLACE)
Don't stare at him or he will f i g h t
I find this funny because you can literally just be standing there admiring him and he's like YEAH SQUARE UP. Silly.
Vassago also just staring like ???? I found this funny because he's probably an eater but will we ever find out??? H O P E FU L L Y
Now MC, this was a damn mistake.
Yeah Morax I'mma need you to stick three fingers in and see if you can find that nice spot that makes my brain go brrrrrr. Thank you.
Uh huh....sure. (though I wouldn't mind a little Juno in my life forealllll)
Asmo would have have a field day, I wish they would have went.
Jjyu if you don't get yo-
Okay but same. Barb is rideable
Okay so when do they even have time to do all that? Real talk when the devils are supposed to be fighting 💀💀💀💀💀💀
I can picture the pose, he got that big D energy.
Beel and that nose of his. Don't let him catch you with anything else that has MC's scent on it....we know how he gets
The husband and wife are present <3 Love them.
Mammon be fr right now p l e a s e (wonder how much he'd pay for feet pics or used panties)
Astra's bf's are fighting again <3 (they do this often anyway in their relationship lmao)
Levi don't threaten him with a good time. This also sounds sexual
Asmo being like: sitri you goddamn cockblocking bitch i was trying to get some dick and here you go ruining it
😭🥺
BELETH MY POOKIE
Anddddd we're doneee~
So basically the christmas cold for MC is being very fucking horny to point of masturbating to death so here we go. Sounds like Solomon was just coughing and doing normal shit and then got healed. Levi even brought up that MC isn't the same so that means that Solomon most likely handled this a lot better than MC.
So far this event is hilariously amusing. Like I know folks tend to not like the consistent "MC is down bad" writing but in this instance I'm just finding it entertaining because what do you mean we're sick and masturbating every time we glance at someone? (it reminds me of that one episode of 1000 ways to die where the gf had a disorder where she had multiple orgasms a day just doing regular chores and the guy she was dating got knocked down the stairs during one of her episodes and he died from a broken neck)
ANYWAYS let's see how the other days go from here....I actually had to omit a couple screenshots from my react list but it's f i n e.
Stay tuned~
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