#so much to unpack here friends
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You know for comedians, you're all a little out of touch.
HACKS Season 3, Episode 4 "Join the Club"
#tw homophobia#hacks hbo#deborah vance#tvfilmgifs#tvgifs#tvandfilm#lgbtsource#tvedit#so many things i wanted to gif from ep 3#AND THEN EPISODE 4 HAPPENED#so much to unpack here friends#this was so personal to her#even when ava asks if she was defending her#she redirects with a joke#ahhhhhhhhhhhhh#ALSO THE STUFF ABOUT HER DAD AFTER THE DJ EP#JPL LOVE LOVE LOVE TO DROP INFO THAT IMMEDIATELY RECONTEXTULIZES WHAT WE'RE BEING SHOWN#and just the way i have to keep reminding myself she went a YEAR without ava's influence#she is so cut off and cold to those around her especially dj#because ava was the one that challenged her to open up#ava is the catalyst#and with out her it was SAFE and she regressed#AND NOW SHE'S BACK#the way she simultaneously can't be vulnerable enough to say she was defending ava and cares about her#but also absolutely the INTERPRETATION for more is there#and i actually can't handle people acting like they KNOW it's difinitively not that
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Currently considering how the first time Daniel is presumed dead Jack broke a window because of how helpless he felt. The way he remembered Daniel screaming for his help, not being able to do anything before it was too late. That really got to him. I think being helpless to the death in his life is a constant theme for Jack that he's always had to accept and sit with and try not to break windows over every day.
So I think it's really fitting and touching that when Daniel really died (ascended, but for all intents and purposes, was dying), when he was dying painfully, hopelessly, in front of all his loved ones- He asked Jack for help, he gave Jack the honor of helping him pass on, trusted him, gave him the opportunity to say goodbye that Jack never, Never seems to be allowed.
#daniel jackson#jack o'neill#stargate#☆ adam originals ☆#i just. theres so much to unpack here and ive been trying to word it un a way that does the idea here justice but. u know what i mean???#daniel gave jack something. his whole reason for ascending was because he was convinced he could do more good that way and ultimately-#-the sucess of that could be argued both ways but the fact that he started his ascension with giving jack comfort and closure that-#-hed never been afforded when watching all his otger best friends fall around him. well its sweet and its such a testimate to his character-#-that the one thing he wanted to do more than anything else was to let jack Specifically say goodbye and see him go peacefully instead of-#-letting him sit and fester watching daniels body die suffering as he'd dome so many times before.#is this thing on HELLO CAN YOU HESR ME IM INSANE ABOUT THEM
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Clips of Orange Cassidy & Willow Nightingale VS Mr Frog & Rachel via AdultSwim's instagram stories at SDCC on 25/07/24
#SO much to unpack here re: willow & oc being the biggest cuties ever#cheersing with the beer bottle mid-match#the cute little post-match jig with their arms linked through the belt#orange being carried away like a damsel who has been rescued#please aew give us willow & oc intergender tag team (and make intergender tag titles) look at them!!! they deserve it!!!#both of them lost their friends and their titles c'mon let them be tag champs together#AEW#SDCC#Orange Cassidy#Willow Nightingale#Taya Valkyrie#Johnny TV
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BTVS (2.02) & ATS (3.18)
#GROWTH
#btvs#btvsedit#atsedit#angel the series#cangel#cordelia x angel#cordelia chase#buffysource#otpsource#usershannen#televisiongifs#tvarchive#our posts#show: btvs#btvs episode: 2.2 some assembly required#btvs season 2#season 3#multi ep#episode: 3.18 double or nothing#so much to unpack here#in the first gif she is seeking comfort and in the second gif she's giving it#in the first gif she is taking overly familiar liberties with his personal space#in the second gif she is the *only* person he'll allow into his personal space at that point in time#in the first gif they are little more than strangers#in the second gif they have become the closest of friends and each other's family#the way no one could have predicted (least of all them) that the dynamic in the first gif would one day grow into the second
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What’s up with the ties between Sally & Eddie?
There are quite a few - to the point where I’m starting to suspect that they may be foils, or at least inherently tied together in the story.
First let's bring things back to the clocks. The “day” side has an obvious resemblance to Sally, like how the “night” side resembles Eddie. There’s not really much I can say here since we don’t know much more yet, and who knows if this has changed behind the scenes. But just think about that, the rarity of the color purple, night vs day, and the “monster”. Keep it in your head, I think it may be important.
Also the fact that Eddie is the only one with a watch, but Sally’s face has an incredibly similar face on her door.
Obviously Sally has some sort of beef with Eddie, despite him being nothing but friendly and (to our knowledge) being undeserving of it. One thought I entertained was “maybe Sally is dismissive of him because he’s a worker,” but that holds zero water when you consider how perfectly friendly Sally was with Howdy (karen Sally debunked <3). The second thought I had was “maybe Sally senses the queer in Eddie and it intimidates her” - which would make sense if Sally is a lesbian like I suspect. Internalized homophobia, anyone? This holds up if Eddie is going to turn out to be - not open about himself, but comfortable in his skin in a way that, say, Frank isn’t. Which I have a feeling that will be the case, which would likely make Sally put on airs even more so than usual.
Anyone else seeing a continuous trend of (social) masks and performances unfolding in the Neighborhood? I sure am.
But let’s talk about why I think they might be foils. They balance each other out in an interesting way, despite their only solid similarity being that Both will work/perform no matter the weather. They have a lot of closely related differences:
Eddie has been mentioned (and implied within the story so far) to have a deeper well of knowledge than he lets on, but acts humble about it. Sally has been mentioned (and implied) to know less than she portrays, but acts like a bit of a know-it-all - she pretends to know things that she doesn’t.
Eddie’s role is about helping others at his own expense, while Sally’s is using others to reach fame.
Eddie strives to connect with his Neighbors and is all about accuracy/precision. Sally is in her own little world and has proved to be more than willing to improvise / not think things through before acting.
Eddie is slow to anger, and Sally is easily irritated.
Selfless vs Selfish.
Night vs Day.
And to put them in the Johari Window - i believe that Sally resides in the Blind Spot (known to others, not known to self), and Eddie resides in either the Facade (not known to others, known to self) OR the Unknown (not known to others, not known to self). Personally I’m starting to believe that Eddie may reside in both.
It’s far too early to draw any real conclusions, and theorizing on all of this is difficult. I feel as though - as usual - we have puzzle pieces but no frame of reference for the way they fit together, what picture they build. And who knows, tomorrow’s update may shred this to ribbons, but I doubt it.
One thought I had was that they’re in cahoots about something - it doesn’t have to be something malicious or some sort of secret plot, it could simply be something they both know and are trying to keep quiet about. Eddie is trying to connect with Sally since they have this in common, but Sally is actively putting distance between them to preserve their secret / plausible deniability. Do I actually believe this? Meh. I’m just throwing spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks.
So current base thoughts: Sally is dismissive of Eddie either because he intimidates/scares her on an internalized level, or she’s actively trying to put distance between them for a currently unknown reason. There’s probably a secret third option I haven’t even considered!
#she's just so fascinatingly dismissive of him in a way she isn't with anyone else#she exclusively calls him 'mailman' she brushes him off when he tries to talk about her halloween costume-#i bet if anyone else has so much as Mentioned the word 'pedrolino' sally would be on them abt it#much like how barnaby had to Escape a convo w/ her bc she was that passionate#so what is it with eddie... why does she feel so strongly about him in such a negative way...#ITS KEEPING ME UP AT NIGHT <3#there is so much to unpack there i feel but i dont have the right scissors yet...#homebogging#welcome home speculation#wh speculation#man i feel so bad for eddie#he's trying to be friendly!!! he's trying to be her friend so hard!!! MAN.#i suspect that if eddie snaps in some way (he probably will) it will likely be in relation to sally#bc no one else treats him that way. like. even like... howdy keeps up an amicable pretense#but sally is straight up out here treating him like a pack mule named 'mailman' and brushing him off with obvious disinterest/frustration#LIKE DAMN. GIRL. WHAT DID HE DO TO DESERVE THIS#i love it. its fascinating. i cant wait to see how that unfolds
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After packing the vast majority of our apartment entirely by myself, and arriving at our new place finally, I am now mostly home by myself bc my husband works 10hr shifts (4 days/week) and I lost my keys in the last minute packing flurry. There’s a whole lot that Can’t Be Done Yet for various reasons, but I want to make progress unpacking…. Decided fuck it, I’m not dumb; I can anchor my own bookshelves to the wall and start unpacking books. They’re not really the most important thing rn but at least it would start getting boxes out of the way since there’s 30 of them.
First I couldn’t figure out why the stud finder wouldn’t turn on— the batteries had been taken out of it.
Then, I couldn’t keep the screw steady enough to get it into the shelf— mostly likely I can’t put enough weight behind the drill at that particular angle.
Now I have to wait for my husband to get home so HE can anchor the bookshelves to the wall for me. Lame. :(
#just in case I would like to say that my husband is lovely#it’s not his fault I’ve had to do so much by myself this move#he wants to help but couldn’t#and he’s taken this Thursday off so we have 4 days in a row of both of us home unpacking#also he and his friends and 2 paid helpers unpacked the truck when we got here#he made me stay inside directing traffic so that I wouldn’t be doing the stairs too much
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one of these days i'll write up a post about the parallels and foils between vivi and hermes and why it fucking kills me. for now all i can say is in hindsight the 'latched onto vivi Hard as a kid' to 'latched onto hermes Hard as an adult' pipeline is Real
#ffix#ffxiv#vivi ornitier#ffxiv hermes#final fantasy xiv#final fantasy ix#the absolute fuckor#hermes really is just such an interesting and visceral deconstruction of/foil to vivi's themes#ranging from *vivi* being the one in the same role as the familiars here#in comparison to hermes meaning the best in the world and trying So Hard; but ultimately coming from a place of immense privilege#and the fact that he was fumbling around in the dark in a society that very aggressively tried to insulate him from any meaningful#perspective on the shitty things he had internalized about familiars without realizing it; much less knowledge to unpack it#and how in the end he still was shitty to and about familiars; including and especially his daughters; who he abused#and some of that stemmed at least partly from his own selfishness and the things he was in denial about#to the fact that vivi had *support* when it came to things like grief and fear and life being precious#and the importance of finding your own meaning in it; while at the same time treating unavoidable death with weight and respect#and people in his life being like 'yeah it's pretty fucking understandable to be fucked up about all this'#instead of at most condescendingly treating him like a freak and an outlier for like. fucking being sad or angry about things. lol#bc *vivi gets angry.* he doesn't just feel sad he gets fucking furious; he feels real ass hate; he wants people to die for what they've done#and when he *does* question that in himself it's not ~uwu if i hate people i'm just as bad as them~; it's 'i've repressed so hard that i#literally have forgotten how to identify what sadness feels like; and it bothers me that my grief response skips straight to hatred now'#i just. god i love vivi so much i could go on. anyway when someone tries to pull a 'familiar-equivalents are soulless puppets#with a single purpose and it's fine to kill them if they're defective or obsolete' vivi tries to explode him with his mind#and his friends go i'll help! and that's why i love ffix#ffixtag#ffxivtag#FF tag
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God of War: Ragnarök Meeting Thrúd
Loki, right? I gotta say, the irony isn’t lost on me. This was his room you know
#i feel like Thrúd fucks with everyone she meets#it's her way of making friends#atreus' little faces are so cute here#he legitimately thinks he's going to bite it and yet STILL tries to show off#side note:#what the fuck happened in her childhood#there's a horror story to unpack here#and i don't think i want to know#tbh i feel like she does miss them so much but odins gaslight her into thinking its better theyre gone#Thrúd GOW#Thrúd Thorsdottir#Atreus GOW#God of War: Ragnarök#god of war ragnarok spoilers#dailygaming#videogameedit#gamingedit#mine: gifs#Chapter: The Runaway#god of war edit#queue of kyber
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👀please, if you're still doing them?
of course!!
this was an interaction I witnessed on the street that bounced around my head like an early 2000s screensaver. this was november. he had two large bobas and she had the straws. I wonder about them sometimes
#she speaks#and answers#thank you friend!!#there was so much to unpack here#i witness a lot of odd people in the new place bc there's just so many of them#another favourite was the businessman in suit tie and briefcase who also had a backwards baseball cap and was facetiming on an escooter#my art
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#every day my roommate has a screaming breakdown over her grad school classes#i’m not exaggerating#and every day for my own peace of mind I have to sit in my room and pretend I don’t here it#I refuse to engage I refuse to be her friend about this I am so deeply adamant about just being roommates#but I also am cognizant that like. I was never allowed to have screaming meltdowns as a kid if something was frustrating#like I’d yell at my parents but I was never banging around the house or like. wailing. that was not acceptable#so part of me is very much like. is the refusal to engage because I’m keeping myself safe and distant#or because I actually view her as being childish cause I tamp my anger and frustration down pretty damn hard#so therefore viewing her as childish is unfair#idk man#idk#I’d like her to stop yelling though#I’m trying to sleep#and yeah I guess my parents did and do label me as hysterical whenever I express a single negative emotion so#perhaps I should unpack equating maturity to being emotionally quiet#I think that can occur separately from me taking on any sort of responsibility to engage w my roommate thoug#I think#I’m not sure#a#/is/ the right thing to do to ask her if she’s okay?#I mean I did do it once and she brushed me off#am I supposed to be providing more support than that?
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And people bitching about Yaz’s gay arc or whatever because it doesn’t fit their personal experience need to shut up about it, really, you are not a monolith and you’re just betraying your ignorance. Just because it’s not relatable to Your personal lived experience, doesn’t mean it isn’t to others, and the casually offensive bs that is spouted in some circles is both inherently self centred and most ironically, pretty homophobic.
#dw shit#there is sooooo much bullshit here#it's hard to unpack it all#yaz's coming of age story including something about sexuality is not weird#it's not weird it happened when she was like 24 in general!!!!#but Especially in the context of the story where we know for a fact yaz was friendless and bullied in school#went straight to a job she overworked at#then met 13 and did nothing but travel with her#like hmmm woman who has Probably not had a deep friendship with anybody let alone a woman#in her adult years#doesn't realise she's In To another woman and thinks they're just friends#is... very explainable in every way#like??? r u guys okay#it would be perfectly explainable if yaz was a social butterfly and Still didn't notice till then!#an uh#najia asking yaz if she's dating 13 and getting a nope and then asking if yaz is dating ryan is#a parent that has no idea whom their kid is into and is deliberately being Inclusive so they don't box them#and/or let them know it's alright if they Are into the same gender#basically her mum is nosy af but not homophobic the end#and tbh since sonya isn't shy about talking about dudes it's probably Super obvious to her parents that yaz Doesn't talk about dating#in a compare and contrast way
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hm, out of all of the things I was expecting when I slowly started putting myself back in fandom spaces, “unresolved trauma from being an autistic kid/teen who was always perceived as Too Much” wasn’t on the list, to be quite honest.
#ooc !#maybe I’ll unpack this more on my personal blog later. Who’s to say. not me certainly.#but yeah the amount of friendships/relationships I had from like. elementary school to high school(to even some of college)#where like. it’s suddenly revealed to me incredibly late that I’m being seen as overbearing / overwhelming / needing or being Too Much#and by then there is no fixing it yknow. by then they’re just telling you to get you to fuck off (or telling other people and not you lol)#(that happened way more often in online fandom spaces)(but tbh my hang-ups in online fandom spaces)#(come WAY MORE from like. interactions with Very Particular People)#(who self-admitted to like. actively trying to dig up dirt that didn’t exist on people ‘just in case’.)(or if they just didn’t like someone#(they aren’t around here anymore but nevertheless the few times we interacted and they tried that w me made me paranoid for ages </3333)#ANYWAYS if you read this far: hiiiiiiiii#i’m doing fine but oh god the weird nostalgic loneliness of being That Kid really hit me all at once#I’m still so bad at making friends now because of all of this naksdak#like I have to put effort into keeping up with people or else I’ll accidentally hold myself back / kind of isolate#under the assumption of like ‘oh you don’t want to scare this person away do you? you don’t want to be overbearing right?’#and it’s like. hey. hey brain. hey bitch. we gotta talk to people to actually form relationships with them. that’s how this works.#vent#anyways I gotta go build a closet now ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ...
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Am I nauseous because I'm hungry or because I triggered myself last night
#my stomach hurts and i need to eat but the idea of doing that is. ack#and i cant tell my parents why because id have to unpack so much spontaneously#like id have to explain i was on the internet before they let me make an account and that i didnt tell them when i was getting those dms#and how its basically ruined any neutrality i had towards sex because ill be fine and then BAM!#everyone else is 12 year old me and im an adult and im my abuser and im going to hurt them if i keep talking about this#just because it was only words doesnt mean it fucked everything up forever. i know back then i was aroace but didnt have the words#but i sincerely think id be just sex neutral if it wasnt for that fucking asshole and now i think about sex for too long and get sick#and i didnt say anything because i thought they were my friend and i dont know if they were 11 like they said they were or not either way#its just. im getting so much off my chest here i wish i could go back in time and tell myself to block after that first message#and i didnt say anything after i realized because i wasnt allowed to have social media and i didnt want to get in trouble over that part#fantasizing alone is one thing but as soon as someone else is involved theyre me and im that person on da and i hate it. i hate it i hate it#i hate it i hate it#is that a common thing. where you feel like youre the abuser in certain contexts even if youre nothing like them#whatever. i have physical therapy and then ask a prof if i can use him as a reference and then finish my application if he gets back to me#and then i can rot all i want#sky vents like amogus
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okay i have my fan going fast enough it sounds like it’s going to fly off the ceiling and kill me maybe i still have a chance at life
#basically my friend and i were literally talking the other day about how I’m not a particularly high maintenance traveller#but one thing I will not budge on (if I’m booking it myself) is that there has to be A/C#and I was saying yeah it’s not even that I necessarily need it like super cold or anything#it’s just that when I overheat it’s like one sensory thing too much with all my other symptoms#and fuck if that hasn’t been true since moving into my dorm#because of course i agreed to move back into the non air conditioned dorms because like genuinely it’s usually so nice all you need is a fan#but ig cause it’s August or cause my health or whatever it’s just been fucking hot as balls#and today especially since I’ve been mostly in bed with my period kicking my ass#it’s just been driving me insane#like i can mostly handle the pain but I just can’t handle the heat like I finally moved my boxes to be out of the way#cause I finally admitted to myself I’m not unpacking them in my current state#and I shed tears over how hot it was just moving boxes like four feet#and like please let it be clear I don’t live somewhere actually hot like im not doxxing myself#but like it’s nice outside but for some reason inside is just gross and on top of my fucking pain it’s too much#i also just I fucking hate move in so much#and I hate that i’m gonna have to text or call my mom and be like yeah im not coming to visit you this coming weekend cause im already dying#and the school year hasn’t started?#like I just tried so hard when I got here to be like ‘yes this is my year for real everything’s gonna be great’ and I just#i’m like one day into being in pain and i’ve lost my mind I can’t even think straight#i KNOW it’s my period I know it’ll last at most a week but it’s so scary everytime that it’s going to last forever cause it used to#im so scared about being an adult I don’t even feel like I can get through this school year but at least this is like. a specific task. what#the fuck am I supposed to do after that when it’s nonspecific#why does everything hurt#why do my arms hurt like that’s not a thing#my fucking throat?!#my legs are obviously killing me cause that’s a near constant these days#my headache isn’t terrible but it’s not great#and my fucking stomach#i think move in should be illegal and chronic pain should be outlawed and I think my parents should call me because what the fuck#boom’s bad days
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Dude yesterday/last night was the most teenagery I’ve ever felt and I’m gonna have cliche teenager mall trip with my other friends later this week too and I’m so happy like I never get to do stuff like this and it’s never this. Fun. Im very happy right now
#only thing that would make it better is if these two friend groups were closer friends but it’s ok I know they don’t have much in common#for the most part at least#gah I love my friends so much#i still can’t believe my ex tried to convince me to cut them all off… but we’re not here to unpack that!!#im happy right now!!!#i love my friends!!!!
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【直接的性格】 BLUNTNESS AND DIRECTNESS
kiyoko is one of the more blunt characters in haikyuu , evident by the way she refuses second-year tanaka’s proposal , humbles the third years during their shrine visit by informing them that a prayer to the gods won’t grant them a victory at nationals , explains to sugawara that she has no intentions of marrying him when she tries to steady his hands with her own , and constantly rebukes tanaka and nishinoya’s outlandish requests to be spanked/scolded.
this blunt character is unique , not only as a character trope , but also in cultural context. directness is viewed as a negative attribute in japan since it can be conceived as abrasive and self-centered—— and it’s especially considered a negative trait for women. in a lot of ways , japan is still conservative about femininity , and women’s behavior is certainly not exempt from scrutiny. most women in media and in trends exemplify youthful cute charms ( girlish femininity , innocence , kindness , etc. ).
it is rarer to see mature and “sexy” styles , especially those that also involve blunt and direct personality types. part of the reason that kiyoko isn’t criticized for being blunt is because she’s attractive and able to suit this style. other haikyuu characters who go against the natural grain like ushijima and tendou don’t have the same sort of social “clout” that a beautiful high school girl does , so their directness is considered a fault. tendou isn’t conventionally attractive and he’s a bit of an otaku nerd ( which isn’t a problem in today’s high schools , but in a private high school 10 years ago could easily have been an isolating factor ) , and ushijima is attractive but a jock-type who doesn’t have the same social fluency as other students ( since he focuses mostly on volleyball and might produce very one-note conversations ). kiyoko may be blunt , but comparatively she doesn’t have anything that ostracizes her from fitting in. she simply chooses not to engage with people at times.
of course , if she weren’t attractive , her bluntness would be considered a fault. it’s simply because she was lucky enough to be beautiful that her direct personality isn’t considered “abrasive.” instead , it lends her character to the onee-san trope ( a mature , no-nonsense , cold woman type ). being beautiful and blunt effectively elevates a woman to some goddess-like level. it may be because onee-san types are somewhat “rarer” to find—— not only is beauty “rare,” but a woman who isn’t the average girly/cutesy type is also “rare.”
however , i think it’s easy to lose sight of the fact that kiyoko isn’t completely cold-blooded and unfeeling. her behavior with the team may make her an onee-san type , but with other characters and other teams , she’s not quite the same. rather than directly refusing others , she adopts a technique of disregard or avoidance. she ignores oikawa who tries to talk to her , rather than confront him—— a person she doesn’t know—— by saying she has no interest in him. she also avoids talking to the players on other teams at the training camp in tokyo who are ushering to try saying hello to her , by instead chatting with the female managers she’s more comfortable with.
when she does have to interact directly with someone , she’s polite and indirect. terushima stops her in the hallway at the spring interhigh and rather than be blunt or ignore him , she uses the typical japanese style of deflecting ( which is considered more polite ) and explains that she has people waiting for her. in japan , people understand an excuse like this to mean that she’s not interested and to signal that she’d like to break away.
also , the way that she interacts with yachi and the other female managers completely contradicts the notion that she’s cold and blunt. tanaka and nishinoya even ogle that she’s chatting a lot , smiling , and having lots of “girl talk” with the other managers , which means that she’s not the sort of solitary person who blocks everyone out.
at face value , an outsider would see kiyoko’s behavior of being quiet , enjoying time to herself , and avoiding/ignoring interactions with people she doesn’t know as being very onee-san-esque. it’s easy to label her as an onee-san because of her outwardly expressed behaviors , in conjunction with the fact that she also doesn’t fit neatly into the cutesy girly trope. from my experience , most japanese women are sorted into these two categories ( the third might be somewhere in the middle , like the “girl next door” type , though that tends to lean youthful and girly too ). but this trope is , of course , just a shallow label and doesn’t hold any weight when considering the spectrum of kiyoko’s social styles. it may just be because most people don’t end up talking to her that they view her this way.
in my portrayal i try to emphasize depth in her personality—— her humor , her tendency to take care of others without being asked , and her thoughtfulness that may not fully manifest as words or actions beyond simply her own ideas. i do think that she’s more blunt and direct than most people. i think she’s not afraid to speak her mind , and to do so concisely—— which isn’t common in japan. i think it makes her a unique character when compared with others in the series. however , i don’t think it’s the one and only aspect of her personality , nor do i think it should be emphasized as the encapsulation of her personality. it’s just one element , and clearly one that she disproves by her proclivity for disregard and avoidance , and her ability to have friendly , sensitive , and supportive conversations with other characters.
#headcanon tag tba.#anyways i just think the onee-san trope is really interesting#because from my experience like 90% of the japanese women i meet are all very cutesy girly and feminine#(obviously from a western perspective theyre much more feminine than me or american women)#so i'm often called an onee-san bc i'm not 'cute' .... like i'm very ambitious and focused and my coworkers have said its very 'sexy'#and i think a lot of people think onee-sans are very refreshing because they're not the trendy norm in terms of style or attitude#but like all tropes saying kiyoko is onee-san type is very shallow because she's actually quite normal and she can have warm conversations#she's a normal high school girl it's just that she doesn't really fit in the cutesy trope box that well and her attitude is more...#'i enjoy being alone too' and 'i'm focused and serious about things that matter to me' and 'i don't always care to humor weird requests'#so on the outside that would make her seem like an onee-san type. and for a lot of people that means she's EXTRA beautiful#i dont wanna unpack het mens psychology and why onee-sans are so attractive but honestly#i think kiyoko gets more attention than a cutesy beautiful girl would... even though theyre both beautiful#her personality SOMEHOW makes her more attractive and i can only think its because its not really common here#and it definitely makes women seem untouchable and elevated to be a bit colder and mature-like#one of my coworkers is quite beautiful and serious about her work... and our other coworkers are in awe of here#her*#even though there are other teachers who are equally as attractive but not as diligent; and some who are diligent but not beautiful#it's really interesting jgksj anyways#i do want to explore more... nonblunt kiyoko stuff.... kiyoko with friends being warm
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