#so much kissing

[reviewdiaries]

Nancy x Ace and the enigma of hope in 4x08

The timeline for this show is insane. Like, we knew it was insane, but this is truly melt your face off crazy fast. In world, Ace and Nancy have had their “we’ll take our space” moment the night before. Game night was last night. Nick is still riding on the high of being freaking awesome, and Rebecca wants to know why Ace snuck back in looking like he’d been crying with two boxes of her silver…

But the speed with which things are happening just makes the start of this episode more painful, because when Ace shows up after Nancy’s text to the group, she truly didn’t expect to see him. She thought they were back to space and not talking and nothing but fissures in her heart where it hurts to see the lack of him. 

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

It also adds a whole new layer of pain to how Nancy has responded over the previous few episodes. When you’re anticipating a tough anniversary it can often be hardest in the days leading up to it when you’re braced for the pain. Suddenly her devastation the night before when Ace leaves her is even harder to watch. Her determination to distract by showing up bright and early at Nick’s door the day before makes even more sense with the context this offers. Her taking a moment to enjoy an uncomplicated moment with Tristan after a traumatic event where she nearly died, even more understandable.

Grief is complex, it layers everything, and how we react to it can often be confusing and inexplicable to those around us. But Ace knows what day it is - of course he does, he absorbs everything about Nancy. And whilst he will almost always show up (work and breakups permitting) there was no way he wasn’t going to be there today, no matter how much it hurts, no matter how much he’s said they’ll have some space. He’ll have told Connor he couldn’t work today because he needs to be there for her. Found himself at a loose end after the night before and ended up sat having breakfast with his dad unsure what to do with a day stretching out empty in front of him. He’ll have sat with the thumping insistence of her wanting space to move on juxtaposed against her text asking everyone to meet at The Claw for a few minutes after his dad left, trying to work out what to do, before he follows his gut, trusts his gut finally and goes to her. For all his fears and doubts he cannot leave her this day, not this day.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams 

It’s there in the little moments, the little pieces of understanding. The quiet comprehension in that Ace way of his without pushing. He’s there for her, in whatever way she needs, no matter how it hurts.

GIF Credit @whitefluffyyeti

 And it does hurt, being around her like this with the pain of their words the night before stuck like barbs under his skin. But so does not being around each other. So does the haunted grief he can see in her eyes. And he’s finally starting to trust his gut again, to listen to the quiet thrumming insistence that he stay, that he help, that he hand her the necklace. Because yes everyone expects to see it on Nancy’s body, but if anyone who doesn’t know about the body swap were to see it on Ace he would be the one person it wouldn’t be strange to see wearing it.

GIF Credit @whitefluffyyeti

It’s been a year of the two of them causing mayhem and getting into places they shouldn’t. And Horseshoe Bay are familiar with the sight of the Drew Crew causing havoc, but more so the sight of Nancy and Ace, Ace and Nancy, the two so often in orbit around each other, a silent support at the other's side. Ace’s mouth a stoic line against Nancy’s playful hijinks that tells whoever she’s up against that he’s got her back, that if they mess with her he’ll be there too, that he has her back, always.

But the problem these few weeks hasn’t been a lack of feeling, of not being there for the other. It’s been a lack of communication, of fighting so damn hard to protect the other that they end up hurting themselves and then the other - not necessarily in that order. It’s being so twisted up in the pain of wanting and not having that they’ve forgotten how to be around each other, how to find the words to admit what they want. And they want the same thing, they have all along, too afraid that they aren’t worth the fight to actually stand up and say how much they want the other to fight for them.

Tied up and desperate and there’s nothing like being stuck in the other’s body to clean the dirt away and show what’s underneath. Love and hope and a depth of feeling that feels like they could drown in it if they slip.

It’s the little details. It’s Ace finding out that Nancy was learning ASL - not so much for him, although of course it’s for him too, but so she can talk to his dad, so she can be part of his family, carve out her own space next to him. And for a moment he looks at her head on (it’s hard to look directly at her whilst she’s in his body, too confusing to see the love he’s worked to keep hidden shining so blindingly obvious from his eyes, how direct his gaze is, how sure he is in his own skin - like looking in a slightly skewed mirror. Because this is something new. This is a sign that she thinks he’s worth it. This is not him doing something to be useful for her, this is her spending her free time learning something to make his life, their life, easier. It’s a chink in the armour, a small sliver of sunlight breaking through the clouds. It’s a lifeline for him to hold onto.

GIF Credit @yellenabelova

It’s the way they speak without words again, how even with his own face staring back at him he knows what Nancy is thinking, knows the quiet reassurance she offers him as he leaves her alone with his dad. She’s got this, and he trusts her. Doesn’t trust many people with his dad - protective in a way he can’t quite articulate, but that’s how he’s found he feels about the people that mean the most. Can’t put the words out into the world, just ties them to his tongue and leaves his heart on his sleeve.

GIF Credit @erinchristmaselvis

It’s allowing the frustration at Nancy barging into the club even though it jeopardises the investigation, to bubble to the surface. Biting out the words that she wanted space, she asked for space, and she’s there, looking confident and competent in his skin and it grates on him in a way he can’t fully articulate. Just as the smell of her shampoo being all around him makes him feel electric in this skin that isn’t his. The feel of being close, so close to her, and unable to feel like he can relax, like he’s constantly stepping over unseen lines and it’s too much and too close and makes him want to scream.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

It’s noticing that she’s slipped out the moment they’re in their own bodies again and not being able to say no to the tug under his ribs that tells him to go after her, check she’s ok, check in, show her he’s there and he cares (he still cares).

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

And he’s not thinking about the bannister at the yacht club. Not really. He’s thinking about the little pieces of her he’s seen today. The tension in her body, coiled too tight and desperate to flee, to do something, to keep busy, to push down the memories that keep threatening to surface. He’s thinking about how tired he felt, how she must not be sleeping. How it felt to be working a case with her, trapped into proximity and cut loose to try and be Nancy Drew for an afternoon. To feel useful and wanted and seen. He’s thinking about the weight of her necklace warm and close to the skin by his heart. The knowledge that she’s been learning ASL. That when he comes to stand next to her by the water’s edge she moves slightly closer to him, weight shifting as though pulled on an invisible string.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

He’s thinking about the layers of the conversation. Because they’re talking about the mystery and the yacht club and Nancy’s tendency to slip off and get herself into dangerous situations on her own. But they’re also talking about how Ace wouldn’t want her to change, wouldn’t want her to stop being her, but just needs her to let him be there, let him in, not be alone in this, to lean on him a little and let him help keep her safe. That he sees her, that he understands her, that he can’t do it, can’t bear the space, can’t bear being apart. And so here they are, even when it hurts, even when they rub each other the wrong way, and he cannot stand to leave her. Just wants her to be safe and happy and near him. Selfishly - he just wants to be selfish, just for a little while. And maybe, just maybe, if Nancy was learning ASL, maybe she wants to be selfish too - maybe they can be selfish together, maybe they can find a new way of being that doesn’t pretend that they don’t love each other. That each other are true north, the compass point that never wavers. That maybe they can find a way back to each other. That maybe this thing between them isn’t twisted into something poisoned. Maybe it was just a rough patch whilst they worked out how to be with each other - reminded themselves what they’re fighting for, what they stand to gain if they keep trying to break the curse.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

It’s the slight wince as he knows he has to give the piece of her back. That he can’t keep the necklace, no matter how much it feels like a piece of her next to his heart. That  for all the lightness in her words (her voice, her eyes, her face) he has to tell her he knows. 

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

He’s known all day. And he risks bringing that heartbreak to the surface but he can’t not tell her he knows her, he sees her. Can’t resist the lightest touch of fingertips against her palm as he gives this piece of her back again.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

Can’t take his eyes off her, bathed in the sunset and all fire and fight and beauty and he knows he can’t risk being burned, but god the fight is getting harder and harder to maintain. It’s getting harder and harder to remind himself all the reasons they shouldn’t break the curse when all the reasons why they should are clamouring to be heard.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

It’s the layers to their conversation as he leaves to go fishing with his dad. Because Nancy is talking about her mum, and what it is to lose a parent, but she’s also talking about them. All they’re left with now are memories, messy stupid memories. And he can see in her face the memory of their kiss, has been trying so hard to shutter out the feel of her jaw under his palm, the frantic flutter of her pulse, the feel of her lips rising up to meet his own, the gasp he let slip at the touch of her that she swallowed down along with the longing that he’d kept hidden for so long.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

But he can see the shadow of other memories that she has that he can only hold onto the brief outline she sketched for him - of his lips on her skin and promises murmured into the crook of her neck and waking up together tangled in nothing but sunlight and sheets. 

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

And it breaks his heart as her voice catches slightly on the idea that he gets to make more memories - with his dad, with another woman. And she is left with ghost of her mother and the ghost of his lips. The pain in his eyes, the pain in her voice. As he looks at her you can see how desperately he’s tamping down the urge to pull her close, whisper into her hair that she’s not alone, that he’s there, he’ll always be there, even when it hurts. It’s another promise, another chink in the armour, in the wall that’s ready to crumble at the slightest push.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

He doesn’t want to leave her, feels like she’s sending him away. But crushes that voice under the understanding that she’s giving him a gift, asking him to make memories with his dad for her, for him, for the knowledge that one day there won’t be any new memories to make. That it will just be these to take out and hold in the sunlight and to remember the good and the bad and the hard and know that they are a patchwork of a father who loves his son. That this is a way for him to honour the memory of Kate, for him to embrace the opportunity to spend time with his dad who’s still here, Knows that this conversation isn’t over, it’s just a pause for breath, to regroup, to allow them both to process the day, knows that he’ll go out on the water and talk to his dad and unpick some of the knots of his feelings and come back calmer and clearer and certain of his way forward.

GIF Credit @livelovecaliforniadreams

Because he doesn’t bother with a greeting or telling her who it is. He’s come back to shore knowing he wanted nothing more than to hear her voice, to check she’s ok after an evening remembering her mum. Barely made it into the car after saying goodbye to his dad before he was hitting the call button. Needs to make sure that she understands. That he knows what she was doing and he’s grateful, that he sees her, sees her pain, sees the ways they make each other better and all the ways they might make each other worse, and he loves her, can’t stop loving her.

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

The emotion so thick in his voice that he can barely choke the words out around the tears in his throat and the fear that’s been winding its way around him all day. 

GIF Credit  @nancy-drew

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

Last night they ended on a discordant note, unsure what the other wanted, poised on a precipice that they never jumped from. And he’s been off kilter and unsure for so long, but today. Today has been sunlight on the water, breaking through the clouds, a chance to breathe a full lungful of air and feel the tension drop from his shoulders. Because he’s been there in all the little ways for Nancy, but he’s started noticing all the little ways she’s there for him too, and to listen to all the ways she’s telling him she loves him too, that she thinks he’s worth it, that she wants to be with him, be near him, keep trying. He can see the disconnect between her words last night and her actions, and it fills him with hope.

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

The pauses are filled with all the things he doesn’t feel he can say yet. All the layers he’s starting to peel back.

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

He’s able to be honest, to let some of what he’s feeling come out. And this is why they haven’t spoken on the phone before now. There are too many opportunities for them to misread, to misunderstand, to second guess when they’re face to face and clouded with emotion and want and the pain of seeing the other. But this, he can speak to his phone, speak to the quiet night around him, let the truth out in small pieces as he lets his guard down and the words out from the confines of his heart.

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

He can tell her these things, doesn’t need to hear anything back, just needs to let the words drop quietly into the silence between them, and to feel a little lighter with the admission. Ace is so good at listening, and being there for her, but he’s bad at admitting his own needs, at expressing his own wants and desires. The most confident we’ve seen him was in those first few episodes of the season where he finally pieced together the curse, and they were on the same page trying to break it. Since then he’s been lost and adrift and in pain and doesn’t know how to right himself, how to staunch the bleeding.

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

And then she says the magic words. I’m not happy without you in mine. Not, I need you, not you’re useful, not you make my life easier. Those are all quantifiable things that Ace can do things about by being of service, by being helpful, be being needed. This is something ephemeral, magical, something other that is simply him being in her life. This is Nancy wanting him for him, for the joy and the peace and the love. They make each other better.

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

It’s such a rare and precious thing to see him smile. And he’s not even smiling for anyone, simply cannot help the surprise huff of joy, the way her words fill him up with something new, something missing from the darkness of the last weeks. Can see him begin to say something

I - 

Bites it off, cuts himself off, doesn’t want to say it yet. Doesn’t want the first time he says it to be to empty air and the sound of Nancy’s soft breathing over the phone. Wants to be able to see her face. Simply sits for a moment in the knowledge that he makes her happy simply by being him, no agenda, no need to make himself be anything more or less.

GIF Credit @nancy-drew

And there’s so much more he wants to say. Is filled up with wanting. Could sit and just listen to her be at the other end of the line for the rest of the night. Fall asleep listening to the sound of her voice, the catch of her breath, the way his heart beats out the rhythm of her name in his chest. In the darkness where he can start to unspool his feelings it no longer feels so insurmountable, his feelings, his fears, his desires. He can start to untangle the simple fact that he loves Nancy, and he wants to be with her, and they’re going to break the curse. Together.

[meimeiherokitten]

So... there was a prompt on here that said "what if Ed takes Izzy up on his offer to kill Bonnet and thru a series of miscommunication, ends up with Bonnet thinking Izzy has a crush and kisses him the night of the fuckery?" By @dillyslinger

I wrote it. And it expanded. Who's up for some canon-divergence fuckery?

There's more coming too!

[laurashapiro-noreally]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Good Omens (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens) Characters: Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley (Good Omens) Additional Tags: Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Ineffable Spouses, Ineffable Partners, He/Him Pronouns For Aziraphale (Good Omens), He/Him Pronouns For Crowley (Good Omens), Kissing, Making Out, Snogging, Biting, finger-licking, Fishhooking, wet and messy, above the waist, Light Dom/sub, slightly kinky, Begging, Top Crowley (Good Omens), Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Power Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Topping from the Bottom, Service Top Crowley (Good Omens), The Final Fifteen, Fix-It of Sorts, not really a fix-it Summary:

I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. -- Bull Durham

My first story in over a year, and wow, I am glad to be back. @racketghost sparked this one with this outstanding post and I had to. I just had to.

--

“Do it again.”

“No.”

Tears still tracked down Aziraphale’s face, but Crowley would not be taken in. Never again would he be swayed by Aziraphale’s manipulations.

“But – surely we’ve said everything there is to be said.”

The angel was flushed, brow knitted, anxious eyes darting here and there. Crowley didn’t read books – he’d been reading this one for six thousand years. Six thousand and more.

“Might have. Might be I need to say a little more.”

Aziraphale’s gaze dropped to Crowley’s mouth. Crowley licked his lips, then could have blessed himself for it. No. Not giving in.

“What is it you want to say, Crowley?”

Crowley wanted to tell him he hadn’t been idle, since Aziraphale went. He’d learned. And if there had been no one left he’d particularly fancied practising with, well, he’d put his disinterest aside, at first. And then he’d worked out how to be interested.

Crowley wanted to tell him he wouldn’t get another chance. There could be no second chances, because this wasn’t his second chance, it wasn’t even his dozenth chance. There were too many to count. And yet, here they both were, weren’t they.

Crowley wanted to tell him he understood what forgiveness was a lot better than Aziraphale ever had.

What Crowley said was, “Beg me.”

Read more

[ramblingoak]

omg do you have a sneak peek or something you can post of the next cardinal's bride chapter??? PLEASE

So the only thing I really have is a bit with Terzo that I posted before which I'll put again here. But other than that Primo appears for the first time! And there's dancing!

And lots of kissing :)

Anyway here's some sad cowboy Terzo:

~~~ ~~~ ~~~

“It’s a song about Lucifer.”  You glanced over at Terzo, sighing when you saw him stamp his cigarette out onto the wood of the bar.  He noticed your look and grinned before flicking the butt onto the floor.  “I wrote it.”

“You did?”  

Terzo nodded, his smile already gone.  His eyes were on his brother now and you couldn’t help but look back at Copia too.  Goosebumps appeared on your arms as his voice rang out clearly in the common room.  

“Have you ever heard him sing before?”

“Not like this.”  Copia’s eyes met yours and your heart fluttered in your chest.  As he started the chorus again two other voices joined in, Swiss and Sunshine easily harmonizing with Copia.  “It’s beautiful.”

“Well, like I said,”  Terzo’s voice was quiet, lacking the carefree tone you had gotten used to.  “I wrote it.”

When you glanced back at him he was wearing a look you hadn’t seen before, his eyes boring into the bar.  It was like he couldn’t stomach watching his brother sing.  More voices joined in and before you looked back towards the stage you saw him wince.

“Then why don’t you join in?”

“I don’t sing anymore, Principessa.”

It felt like a confession and when you finally managed to drag your eyes away from the stage Terzo was gone.  You looked around and saw him at the door to the dorms.  His eyes met yours but his face remained blank as he turned and left.

[murcielagatito]

still processing this episode im not gonna lie

[writer-rider-flirty-thirties]

Marinette wants this to be the best Christmas Party ever. Tikki has an idea for how to make it perfect.

For Miraculous Ladybug Secret Santa Exchange 2022 for @bizarrelovesquare <3

[phantom-of-the-501st]

Remember that this is not the proof that they love each other

That was a last-ditch attempt from Crowley to get Aziraphale to stay

This is the proof that they love each other

Their love wasn't just made real because they kissed

It always existed

[aldecaver]

Just their usual Monday

[its-your-mind]

[theeroticlover]

Mhmmm !!! Come here you ...

[meimeiherokitten]

Hey there, duckies! Next chapter is up! Wanna know what symbols Izzy and Stede have for each other? Go find out!

Don't worry, it isn't done yet. These dramatic bitches got some more dramatic bitching to do. And smut.

[nalonzooo]

you ever like someone so much

[mothgenes]

i need to psychoanalyze him fr .

[nutmeggery]

actually I will say something about this:

setting up a romance line but waiting until one of the actors is a freshly legal adult before executing it is creepy, actually, especially when the co-star is 15 years older

[blackkatdraws2]

[Toon x Mobster] A tender moment.

[Animation timelapse here!]

[AUDIO USED:] Chet Baker - Almost Blue Sound Effects edited by me!

[evgar]