#so much for not venting on main lmaooo

[lover-of-mine]

so I saw your earlier post about how Tommy is getting Ali’ed, and I wanted to ask about who you think is the most developed and likeable out of Buck’s love interests? (except Eddie ofc, he’s the best and I can feel it in my bones that he will become endgame.) I’m still in s3, so I’m kinda a new watcher you could say. (I’ve read too many tumblr spoilers and copius amounts of fanfics though, so I’m able to keep up with and watch season 8 live).

I wanted to ask this because I’ve seen so much Tommy hype and promotion on here that I really thought that he was developed as a character and a main. But from what I’ve heard, he’s only worse than Buck’s and Eddie’s actually developed love interests. Before I actually started watching the show, I’ve only heard bits and pieces here and there about 911 and the “gay” firefighters, but that’s about it. I only started watching seriously during season 7, and I’m a pretty slow binge-watcher (hence why I’m only 3x12 lmao). When I went back to season 1, I fully expected to see Tommy (bc honestly, I thought Tommy and Eddie were the same person for a while lmaooo), but then I got to season 2 and saw the begin episodes and I was like wtf? How do people actually like this man? Eddie is literally RIGHT there. Even if Eddie wasn’t endgame or a romantic interest, he’s still a better compliment to Buck platonically than Tommy is romantically. So then I thought “oh maybe he had a redemption arc or like changed for the better like Buck did,” but from what I’ve seen on s8 and on here, it seemed like he didn’t? So that only makes me more confused on why a majority of the fandom seems to love his character. Personally, I don’t really see anything, but I guess everyone has their own opinions 🤷🏻 . Though, I’m scared that I’m basing this on too little info and I missed something because I haven’t watch seasons 4–7.

(this got so long I’m so sorry. it kinda ran away from me a little bit 🫡. Lowkey needed to vent my thoughts)

Hi, darling! I'm gonna ignore Abby, because in the context of season 1, Buck is her love interest, not the other way around, since she is the main character. So most developed is hands down Taylor. Ali was barely there, and Natalia didn't fulfill what they wanted to do with her since the actress couldn't come back to s7. Likable is complicated because Ali and Natalia aren't around enough for you to get attached and, Taylor and Tommy have a past of hurting the 118, so it's hard to be sympathetic at times. Taylor gets a lot of background information, they live together, even though the relationship is clearly wrong, both of them are trying to make it work as best as they can, so it makes sense for Taylor to be around. She tries to love Buck as best as she can, it's just not enough, they are incompatible. And, well, Tommy. Imma be honest, the only thing Tommy has going for him is the fact that he is a man. The bt fandom took that and ran. Basically, they decided that since he is a man and a first responder that meant that the relationship would be super developed and they built it UP based on nothing really (actually based on Lou having a cameo and people paying him to headcanon with them, but that's a whole another you just had to be there), not on the show at least. I don't believe he had a redemption arc, the show kinda makes it seem like being queer excuses his behavior and just doesn't address it. In my opinion, when I try my best to be unbiased and ignore the way I deeply hate the character because of the fandom, I think Tommy is pointedly being written as a bad fit in Buck's life and the relationship will run its course once Buck wakes up and stop just accepting whatever.

And if you think Eddie is the better compliment to Buck and you're still in 312, just wait, they get more intense. It's madness. They are soulmates, I don't care about anything else.

[voxasks]

ᡣ𐭩 • ｡ EVENT : 200 FOLLOWERS <3 ( CLOSED )

just to avoid any confusion, please type the emojis in the beginning of the ask and nowhere else unless you’re signing off as a specific anon, thank you!

this event is ENTIRELY based off of @hellishradio’s <3

asks regarding this event will be tagged under ‘.voxasks 200 event’.

— contents :

𐙚 ASK THE EDITOR !

𐙚 INTERACT WITH VOX !

𐙚 KIND WORDS .

𐙚 ASK THE EDITOR !

🐋 . . . ask me anything like my headcanons, opinions of my muse, how i write my fics / think of my ideas or responses, or even my personal life

🦋 . . . send me a plot / story idea you have for my muse and i will tell you how i would write it (so kinda like an imagine?) though my main blog is specifically a fanfic blog so you can also just send in any requests if you have any at @bindeds (and ofc, i take vox requests lmao)

💧. . . send a “dress/draw vox in _____” and i will draw it!

💦 . . . send me any character from hazbin hotel and i will provide any opinion, vision, or headcanon about them!

𐙚 INTERACT WITH VOX !

🫐 . . . tell me about yourself anonymously and vox will tell you his inner thoughts about you! ( gender + personality + likes + dislikes + hobbies + etc, you don't have to answer all sections if you're uncomfortable! )

🧊 . . . put vox in a specific scenario! and he will react!

🌊 . . . vox can't lie LMAOOO send any asks and my muse will tell his truth!

🛝 . . . ask a question! works like a regular ask but i will add an ooc comment of my headcanon so there's more info!

❄️ . . . send in anything you're sad about, whether it be a vent, something you're stressed about, etc. vox and mod will give you advice! ( send anonymously please, and include any trigger warnings! will be tagged ‘.voxasks advice’ so if you don't want to see asks like this, please block the tag. vox won’t be such a bastard obviously, because i just know this man has SOME sad backstory somehow )

🥣 . . . send any confessions and vox will react!

🐳 . . . send a headcanon about vox and both vox and mod will react!

𐙚 KIND WORDS .

🍓. . . i love how you portray your muse

🍇 . . . i love your aesthetic and graphics

🍒. . . you're one of my favourite blogs

🥩 . . . your posts always make me happy

🍿. . . im grateful for your blog

🥤. . . admiring from afar

i look forward to your asks guys, thank you again so much for 200 ! it really has been so fun with you guys <33

[depressopax]

Dating Kim Wexler headcanons

Pairing: Kim Wexler x gn!reader Genre: Fluff, headcanons Warning(s): Cheesy lmao, reader is gender neutral (and referred to as “partner”), some dirty jokes lol Words: 700 Summary: Being in a relationship with Kim Wexler would include…  English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 NSFW version AO3 link soon!

Pretty much: You fell hard, she fell harder.

Kim is not really good at romances, so you’d be the one to take the initiative with flirting and dates etc.

When you first confessed your feelings for her, homegirl was confused af.

Like, totally clueless and flustered lol

…Which you’d probably take as a sign she doesn’t feel the same

But oh, so does…

When she tells you she feels the same, you can hear the relief and happiness in her voice, though she tries to act calm

She would be the one to say “I love you” first, and would do so without realising it, leaving you both surprised.

But you didn’t mind, since you felt exactly the same but just waited for the right moment to say so.

Being Kim’s partner also means being her best friend.

She trusts you with her secrets and dares to show you her true feelings. 

She’ pretty reserved, but not when it comes to you

You know her too well, and know when something is wrong.

And you’re always there to support her, of course. 

She does the same for you.

After a rough day, she wants to be the shoulder for you to cry on.

She is a bit awkward when it comes to cheering you up, but she will be there for you either ways

She’s a good listener too. Whether it's just you venting, or asking for advice she succeeds to support you.

The two of you have good communication. 

None of you like conflicts, and hate the thought of being angry at each other. Of course, you sometimes have disagreements but always find ways to solve them.

Apologizing to each other in the most cheesy ways lmaooo, like buying flowers, leaving sweet notes to each other etc…

…Or in other ways iykwim ;)

One of Kim’s favorite things is having late night conversations with you.

Staying up at night, in bed or outdoors whilst watching the stars and talking.

The both of you have everything from deep conversations to random rants

…Or talking shit about people you don’t like

Kim likes calm dates with you - going to a romantic restaurant, movie nights at her place, etc…

She’d even take you on spa dates, spoiling you in all ways possible.

She also likes taking you out for walks in beautiful places - such as the beach and forest.

She holds your hand tightly on walks, enjoying the feeling of being out in nature with her loved one.

Kim might not be the most affectionate, but she shows her love for you in other ways.

She doesn’t really say “I love you” with words, but rather with actions, such as touch and quality time.

She has a busy job but makes sure to spend her free time with you, because she wants to, and to show you her love for you.

She is not that big fan of PDA, but doesn’t mind handholding and hugs.

But it's a whole other thing if she feels insecure or jealous. Then she won’t hold back with PDA, kissing you, calling you pet names and making sure to be extra affectionate. She trusts you, but still doesn’t like it when people try hitting on you

She’s also VERY protective of you.

If someone is being a jerk to you, let’s just say they’ll reget it.

Other ways she shows love for you:

Sharing clothes, she loves seeing you wearing her things, and loves wearing your things. That way, she always has you with her, cheesy as it sounds.

She likes making coffee for you, especially in the mornings so she can wake you up with a hot cup of coffee

Sharing cigarettes with you (if you smoke too)

The way she looks at you says a lot, too. She tends to look your way with a smile and affection.

Kim does like cuddling you, but you’ll have to convince her

She prefers being the big spoon

Or having an protective arm around your shoulders or a hand on your hip when sitting next to you

Her favorite place to kiss you is your forehead and cheek

She loves how soft your face feels against her lips.

Kim doesn’t want to move too fast in the relationship

But with you - the idea of asking you to move in is very tempting.

She also wishes to marry you one day

You’re her number 1 fan, and she is yours. <3

[the-kr8tor]

MY DEAR 🪦 ANON...YOU KNOW..I THINK WE MIGHT HAVE MORE IN COMMON THAN I ORIGINALLY THOUGHT. Daily Hobie HC! I couldn't do character study tonight because of assignments but tomorrow I swear It's almost impossible to be proper enemies with the Spider-Punk, which was the cause for the weird friendship between the two of you. Being the Prowler, it was an oddity to see you and Spidey, as you call him, running around like chaotic children on the roofs. Some days, you both manage to do your jobs well done, being in a pretty good mood. Other days? Sometimes the other just needed to vent out pent-up frustration, which was the main cause for the battles everyone else sees. Sometimes, Spidey just needed to punch things, and would use you as his own punching bag with your permission, always keeping an ear out for the word 'pulp', a safeword in case it got too much to handle.

Other times, it was you who needed to beat the shit out of Spidey, curling in the robotic claws of your gauntlet and powering it into his chest, knocking him back. After these venting fights, you both would seek refuge in a nearby alleyway or a secluded area, tending to each other's wounds after the battle. During this period, it was usually verbal venting, with various 'what's wrong?'s and reassurance. The fact that you both acted like close friends, yet never knew how each other looked like, never even entered his or your mind. Once, Hobie sat on the edge of a roof, looking down at the hazy city below, sniffling slightly under his suit. He felt as if he was coming down with something, his throat feeling itchy. Luckily, you managed to appear right next to him, taking your own seat and asking the casual question of how he is, handing a crinkly brown bag with a donut inside for him. As the two of you conversed, with Hobie rolling up the bottom of his mask to eat the food you had brought him, he mentions about how he might be coming down with something. Hobie nods and smiles as you offer to take over for him until he feels better, which definitely doesn't go unpaid by him. The moment he's up and running again, he nicks some food for you as well and offers it to you as a payment gift. Although he knew you couldn't exactly eat it in front of him due to your helmet, you always ensured to eat it when you were alone. One fight, while Hobie was taking out his stress of being Spider-Man, he had accidentally landed a punch that messed up the control of your helmet, springing it wide open and unintentionally face revealing you. Hobie paused as you tried to quickly fix it, to no avail. With an awkward chuckle, he gives you a very out of pocket compliment, genuinely feeling taken aback at how lovely you were on his eyes. No doubt, the ordeal was quickly forgotten with the sound of laughter, until Hobie decided to even it out and pulled his mask up fully, causing you to choke on your own spit briefly. Oh no. He's hot. -🐦‍⬛

🐦‍⬛🤝🪦

Daily Hobie HC ‼️‼️‼️

No worries!! Good luck on your assignments!

Wosnqpmsms yknow i love a good reverse roles au!!!

HAHAHHAHAHA they're dating but they're the only ones who don't know it yet

Their love language is beating the shit out of each other! I can just imagine them patching each other up after a good fight while munching on slices of pizzas (hobie gives the last slice to r ofc but they cut the last slice in half to share 🥺)

They're literally partners and everyone in the city is so confused about their relationship I bet there's posts speculating abt their relationship lmaooo

I wanna share a donut with him too 🥺

R is as lovestruck as Hobie after the impromptu face reveal!! Except hobie is pretty good at hiding it but r is like frozen on the spot who can't even get a word out 🤣

[momotonescreaming]

Howdy!!

I just read your Dustin and Steve fic and it was spectacular!! So well written both in just the overall story but also in Dustin and Steve’s characterizations!

I was curious would you ever be interested in writing this story or snippets maybe from Steve’s perspective? You wrote Dustin’s pov so perfect both in his internal monologue and his external experiences that I would love to see your take on Steve’s perspective of this story! Like Steve’s feelings building up to the initial conflict, how he dealt with the abrupt separation from Dustin, his discussions about their fight with Robin and Eddie how he reacted to Dustin’s voicemail! You wrote this story so well I would just love to see your writing from the other side

Obviously if you are not interested in writing more for this story no pressure but if you did you would have a very engaged reader at the ready lol! Thanks for sharing your story!! 💕

Hello!!

Thank you so much for reading!! and for liking!! It really means a lot!! 💜

It's definitely been something I've been thinking about! Writing something from Steve's POV. Just not in so much detail, so I'm not making any promises lol 😅. Maybe something small, a scene or two focusing on him venting to Robin and Eddie or something. Definitely not something as long as the main fic was, I worry that it will just detract from the emphasis of it? Plus there's not as much to explore since Dustin was the one who had to go through some changes.

I've also been considering a mini sequel of sorts, where Dustin is trying to be better, he's making progress, but he's finding he's not butting heads with Mike. Maybe Mike will demand some free stuff off Steve, demand a ride, call him lame. And Dustin is not losing Steve again, so he stands up for him. Tells him to quit it. And Mike has this moment of insulting Dustin for going lame, he's not fun anymore. What's wrong with you, do you like Steve more than us or something? And Dustin kinda goes - what if the answer is yes? What if I do like Steve better than you Mike? And has to go through the horrible situation Steve went through where you realise that you and your best friends aren't on the same page anymore. Except he's got Steve on his side this time. He's still trying. He's better.

That being said, I'm a little mentally strained right now to even think about writing anything 😅. It's like my brain needs to boot up again, come back online. Everyone's responses to this fic have been so sweet, and so lovely, and just sort of a lot. I'm not used to it! And I'm more overwhelmed than I thought I'd be lmaooo

Long story short thank you so much!!!! You're so so nice and so so flattering 💜💜💜

[rawrtriesagain]

Long post incoming idk how to do Read More on mobile, sorry. Tldr: just a post abt my writing as usual and stuff about my interest in lwa (nothing crazy)

I know I talk abt my old fuckin fics all the fuckin time (like Jesus theyre old enough to be considered toddlers now) but anyway this is my vent blog and y’all will never hear the end of it so guess what still has an absolute GRIP over my mind after 3 years

Its forest of arcan- im jk its dreamer of stars lmaooo. I reread it right now for the funsies after months of forgetting abt it, and each time I read it I think “surely I am over this story and can move on with my life” and like the first half of the story its like yea I kinda am over it haha but then the second half just obliterates the thoughts and runs me over and I just lay in my bed and contemplate my life and go into like a State of Emotions and simply have to talk about it (but it also could be because its 4am at the time of writing this)

I do think it mostly has to do with nostalgia though. Truthfully I’m probably not able to write smth like that again because it was 100% written completely on emotion and quite actually everything bad Diana was feeling in the story was smth i was also going through so it was easy to… write a vent and disguise it as a fic LOL. But I was also running on the high of being in love with my best friend which also really easily translated to everything going on in the fic blah blah nobody remembers it but me so this means nothing to anybody and im being cringe and gay on main (not even my main)

ANYWAY the point of my babbling here is that honestly I miss having that intense amt of emotions that would spur that level of creative writing? Like yea forest of arcana (not updated in over a year) is fun and all but it definitely isnt written on a personal level like dreamer was. I also just genuinely miss writing lol and its like ok bitch why dont you write then and then its like good question why dont i?? I probably still enjoy writing more than i do drawing and i know my blogs say otherwise but the two mediums are both definitely different outlets for my life. Maybe i would change my mind the day my art is actually good tho 😛

Im laffing rn seeing me talk abt this “deep” different outlets of life cause like when u think abt it im also literally just Currently describing little witch fanfic and fanart since thats all i do LOL. Not that theres anything wrong with lwa being my Muse of course, but it just adds humor in whatever the emo hell im going on about

Another side sad mini vent but i dont think im as into lwa as i used to be which also waters down my interests in doing things, but im literally not interested in any other media or fandom rn either so lwa stays my hyperfixation. Plz dont be alarmed lol im not saying im NOT into lwa anymore since diana is still a fuckin god to me like 10/10 chara design and vibes, but its definitely not as strong as it was when i first joined the fandom 3 years ago. And you know what maybe it has to do with me not watching little witch academia in full in those entire three years after i first watched it lmao. Most of the friends ive made in the fandom are pretty much gone too which is sad but is what it is. Sometimes i get a burst of seratonin when i think about smth diakko and definitely like now when i reread my fics i also remember the Emotions i had for these Gays and it like floods back for a bit like a buff.

I think something im very interested in for both the spark of writing and also the revitalization for my love for diakko is that i wanna do like a oneshot slice of life series for diakko. Just something easy, cute, subjectively funny, and a vibe. I still fantasize abt diakko shenanigans even if mundane and i wish i could also capture it more in my art but im not at that level yet, so writing it is. First i probably need to rewatch lwa in full since ive forgotten most everything except for key diana scenes haha oopsie And sucy world episode that was a good fuckin episode.

Anyway thanks for reading this far if you did lol sorry for the LONG ASS NONSENSE POST. Sometimes i see how i type in my blog and to people and compare it to my writing and its like where the hell did my comprehensive english go. Sorry if this was just hard to read from the lack of grammar and punctuation but thats showbiz anyway stay tuned for the next diana content ttyl bffl rofl xD zomg

[finsterhund]

reading a quick synopsis of To The Moon

jesus christ so this thing essentially plays out like it’s a fix-it-fic for one of my background characters in my main original work????

That I cannot get into under any circumstances because massive spoilers????? Like spoilers that could completely recontexualize the entire thing??? And book one isn’t even published and this is like prequel era stuff???? so I’m, just stuck with this in my head and I need to suffer?????

that was written to vent a specific flavor of my childhood trauma?????? (If you’ve been here for the Spot photos saga you can kinda get a sense for what it’s all about but ???? I guess I’ve made steps in recovery in this area but ????)

 oh fuck oh shit jesus christ oh my fucking shit

also there’s themes that are like, hand selected to deal the most emotional damage to me possible. Constellations lmaooo lol fuck shit. It’s no wonder I like, am blocking out this game my god.

Yeah if I try to replay this it’ll kill me.

gonna make a joke to try and deflect how I feel right now and say that this memory manipulation organization if they had been on Power Island could have prevented so much shit. Leave it at that. That meme image of the photo of the two books one big one small. Oh god oh fuck.

Bruh of course when I write characters who experience the same basic fucking concept I don’t let them have a happy ending what is wrong with me (yeah a lot okay i think you can tell by now.)

But man.

Themes of forcing child through unnatural means to forget extremely important childhood memories because they’re traumatic can I get a hell yeah?? *quiet whimpering sobs*

fuck shit goddamn it

[mizuski-pirat]

UPDATE

BECAUSE I CAN

(pay no attention to the fact it has been less than a day)

Unlike some of the later supersoldiers, F1t isn't really a hybrid/based on an Animal (...probably) he's sort of just REALLY buff. Pumped full of chemicals and cybernetic enhancers. (He doesn't look TOO bulky though, you gotta have SOME subtlety man) however, he does have some other war-related modifications, like a cyborg eye to better track and hunt down prey, improved senses and instincts, and a great memory! (He's gonna regret that one last lmaooo) Also no super healing, L. He's really tough-skinned, so hard to injure, but once you actually DO he can't just magically heal himself unfortunately (well, unfortunately for him anyway ehehehe)

The big reason he's so well known is he was in a lot of huge epic fights with a Minotaur-like hybrid supersoldier from the other side that fucked him up big time but eventually he emerged victorious and was subsequently used as propaganda by his country to say HEY LOOK!!! HE'S SO STRONG ISN'T HE WOWWW!!! OUR GUYS ARE SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOUR GUYS!!!!!! SEE?? HE BEAT THAT GUY!!!!!!!!! (Hence the other countries considering him a threat, and the general public also thinking he's A LOT stronger than he actually is)

I mentioned earlier that there are other super soldiers? Yeah. There are like. A lot. Fit isn't even the strongest by a long shot, he's maybe top 10. I'm thinking Cellbit is one (a hunter-type cat hybrid envoy) and mmmaybe Phil? Due to his cannon war-like past on the QSMP and the fact that he is birb, but volunteering himself to be a giant suicidal pawn doesn't really seem like him. He doesn't like authority. Maybe he needed the sign -up money for his many kids? Anyways, they aren't in Pac's clinic. There are a couple of other supersoldiers in there, but none of them are as known. All of them are brutally and utterly injured. And all of them are unusable. (And none of them are Pac's favorite ;)

Speaking of country... Yeah the nationalities and detailed descriptions of the war and the history or whatever aren't important. Like. Genuinely. When Fit signed up to be turned into a monster , he was a lower class citizen with no family, no purpose, no future, and experiencing what he'd like to call "post-youth anger issues" (having a really violent childhood will do that to you) when he caught wind of some wildly inaccurate propaganda offering the "opportunity of a lifetime". The motives of any of the countries in this story aren't NOBLE or "GOOD", in fact, I'm pretty sure the whole 10 years ish war was about territory. It doesn't matter who won. It doesn't matter to FIT who won. People still died anyway. The most "governments" will play a role in this story is providing slightly over bare minimum funding for Pac's "rehabilitation" program. Sorry for the vent, but that's just how wars work sometimes. :/

Ramon and the other eggs aren't present in this, they mostly just don't fit yet. I imagine that the adoption of Richalyson and Ramon would come after the main storyline, when Fit isn't in immediate danger of dying or killing all the time (oops spoilers)

Enjoy, people in my phone!! :D

Pac stealing Fit's blood homoerotically the other day gave me an idea for a Mad scientist AU :0

I definitely don't have the skill to do anything with it so if anyone wants to adopt it feel free lmao

I might explode into brainrot about it on here occasionally tho 👍

Think combination Frankenstein+ Monster and Capitan America style scientifically created supersoldier... But reverse.

So Pac is a scientist who specializes in chemistry and biology (with a dash of mechanics... Unless Mike handles that) who recently signed up to rehabilitate, heal, and re-humanize chemically-created supersoldiers after the end of a recent war (because leaving them crippled, traumatized, and dehumanized in more ways than one is no way to honor them for their service... As long as they're no longer of good use)

Fit was a particularly powerful and infamous super soldier, one of the first actually. (So leaving him on active duty would be seen as a threat to other countries). But... Beyond that, he's also very very badly injured.

Becoming a chemical and partly mechanical monstrosity isn't exactly good for you, so it's sort of expected that even if you don't die during the transformation process, you'll either die sometime afterwards or at least much earlier than the regular human life expectancy. Going through a whole damn war definitely didn't help. (I'm thinking maybe blown up by specially designed "End" crystal explosions at least 35786543 times). So by the time the war was over, he was more or less found in an explosion-torn ditch in the middle of the wasteland, surrounded by corpses, entirely unable to move, and in constant unimaginable pain (he's still pretty much in constant pain all the time btw. Everything hurts). There's little-to-no chance he'll ever fight again.

This is where Pac comes in.

[the-pigeon]

sometimes you just gotta sit down and realise that you kinda suck. and then you gotta learn to deal with that

[youreonyourown-kid]

It’s so weird to me that Harry Potter is such a huge thing all around the world and the fandom is so big. 

I cant remember when I first read the books but I was young enough to not know or care what was mainstream or popular, and my parents never stopped me from enjoying it but they also wouldn’t have like...brought me to any midnight releases. They had jobs and two other kids. And I just like...liked being in my own little world.

I slowly, very slowly, realized I was not the only person who liked the books a whole lot. And it was fun to talk about it to others, but in the back of my mind I was sorta “sure they like it but this is my thing. and they’ll never really like it like i do”.

AND. It wasnt until college that I realized how many different takes there were. People LIKED and DEFENDED SNAPE?????? People thought HARRY and DRACO were MEANT TO BE???? PEOPLE SHIP HARRY AND VOLDEMORT???????? Like making ol Voldy younger and calling him “”””””Tom””””””” somehow makes it okay (honestly this is the wierdest to me why is it so popular on AO3 still idk i try not to judge but gotdamn people.) AND MOST CONFUSINGLY AT THE TIME PEOPLE WANTED TO BE IN SLYTHERIN(i have since grown and learned but really it was culture shock at the time). None of this stuff shocks or surprises or bothers me anymore, everyone can enjoy things in whatever why they want unless you ship harry and tom thats just weird guys i mean do you but i never want to see it .

ANd really sometimes i’ll take looks inside the fandom and look at the art and read the fics. But mostly, it’s still just my thing. I love it in a way that’s completely mine and no one else really understands. And that’s okay. Sometimes it’s just odd cause...all the other things I really love I LOVE sharing and discussing with other people. 

[leoxxii]

oops! all sadness anger and bitterness in the chilles tonight!

[bitterxweetencounters]

~5 months later~

Ok I lied. I’m not going to talk about my Japan trip in this post. Instead I’m going to provide an update on what’s been going on in my life for the past 5 months since my last post. Lol. 

Okaaaay. So we ended up having a second wave. Hahah..aha..hah. A very intense and overwhelming one, at that. There was a day I believe when the number of new covid cases reached almost 800? It happened around mid this year. I remember it being a really devastating and disappointing period of everyone’s lives. It would seem like the number of new cases would only get worse everyday. I would be so put off from watching the news or reading about anything related to covid ‘cause it would only make me depressed. 

Today is a notable day to write this post ‘cause today’s the first day, since this second wave started, that VIC reached 0 new cases and 0 new deaths. 4 stages of lockdown (plus an extension) later, we're finally here! Everyone up until this day had been feeling it - despair, restlessness, anger, hopelessness - at this lockdown that seemed would never end. But today we got the news that VIC will be re-opening again (1st stage) this Wednesday (it’s a Monday today), then even more on Nov 8. The glimmer of hope we’ve been waiting for, for literally months now. 

Now for the non-covid related updates. Lol. 

It’s tempting sometimes to overgeneralise 2020 as “the year wasted”. “Nothing happened this year” (besides covid of course). But there have been a few new things I’ve experienced this year which I think would be worth noting. And a few thoughts I’ve been having lately that I really need to deposit somewhere before I forget them. 

Ever since I became single early this year, I’ve received some interesting dm’s via Instagram. One of the first ones was from this guy from Canada, who sent me one of my posts via my DM then proceeded to comment “cute haha *monkey covering it’s mouth emoji*”. I got this message while I was showering, at like 3am, so it was pretty unexpected. This was the beginning of a very strange friendship (?) thing. Long story short, and around a month later, I found out him to be a very strange guy. He was cute, seemed like a catch at first. BUT he gave off major player vibes and also, he was basically 4-5 years younger than me, and didn’t live up to the maturity he claimed to have (emotional maturity mainly). He would make it seem like he was after a relationship with me sometime in the future but also kept implying that he wasn’t necessarily after a relationship right now, and just wanted to “go with the flow”. He was always complimenting me, always wanted to FaceTime everyday, and would sweet talk me with things that were nice to hear. But I couldn’t shake off the feeling that he was bad news and wasn’t really serious about any of this (I even kept telling him I was thinking this). I should mention he was asking for a selfie and wanted to FaceTime from the very first conversation we had (after only exchanging a few messages). We didn’t even know each other yet?? Lmao. After a few weeks of talking to him I eventually caught him in a lie, and yeah. That was one of the biggest red flags. I had a weird feeling about him from the get go, but I guess I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt (and also what threw me off a lot is that he told me that he told his Mum about me - but I’ll never know if that was just a lie too). He also told me that he was going to visit here from Canada in August (it’s October now) and kept going on about how he wanted to spend a whole week out of the two weeks he was going to be here, with me, and how I’m so chill and fun to talk to that we would have so much fun spending time together. Lmaooo. He told me he’s dated a lot of older girls (I’m not sure if this is a fetish of his), but every time I asked him how many exes he’s had, it would always be a different number (which is hella sus ‘cause it seemed like he was lying then). He tried to do some weird sexual stuff as well which I never entertained and pretty much shut him down straight away whenever he tried. Not sure if he was just joking, but it was disturbing nonetheless. I won’t go into detail ‘cause this isn’t the place for it. It eventually got to a point where I was decided on the fact that I couldn’t take this guy seriously and didn’t want to waste both our time so I started replying less/later to his messages, basically friend-zoned him by calling him “man” and “dude”, and teased him about other girls saying that he had potential with them. I think he eventually got the hint ‘cause one day he just stopped texting me “good morning” everyday. Lol. But anyway, yeah that was more or less the main stuff about guy #1. 

Guy #2 was from London and it started with one of my girl friends messaging me and asking me if I was talking to someone at the moment. I said I wasn’t and she proceeded to tell me that one of her boyfriend’s friends found me really pretty and wanted to follow me on Instagram. She then sent me a few photos of him (screenshots from his IG account), asking if I would be interested (I felt like I was on a dating site for a moment lmao). While flattering, I remember thinking this was so bizarre. To be honest with you though the guy wasn’t my type (looks-wise). My friend said he was “a real sweetheart”. Even though he wasn’t my type, I gave it a chance and told her that I don’t mind him following me. We both agreed that the guy and I had nothing to lose, and if anything we’d just become international friends. Lol. So soon enough the guy follows me on IG and then starts a convo via DM. He introduces himself, seemed like a nice/decent guy. Very articulate, and well versed. He would comment on my stories here and there and try to get a conversation going, try to get to know me better and try to share things about himself. I think I recall him saying he thought I lived in Japan ‘cause I had a lot of posts from Japan. Lmao. It would get to the point though where he would write massive paragraphs, but the energy wasn’t called for, and didn’t feel mutual. I think I found it a bit overwhelming and felt like he wanted to take every opportunity to write an essay about his views on everything. There was a particular time I did an IG story post where I was venting about something, and he replied to it with like two long paragraphs worth of his thoughts, and then said he would be there for me even though we didn’t really know each other that well yet etc. Which was really sweet - yes. But also felt too early, premature. It almost felt like he was trying to forge an emotional connection too early on in a relationship which wasn’t even at the friends stage yet. We’d only been talking for like 2 weeks or so. I couldn’t help it, but I think my neutral and short replies gave off a hint, and he commented less and less on my stories. Till eventually he stopped altogether. Lol. Also I think I may have accidentally called him “man”....on purpose. I feel like a horrible person. There was a point early on though that I looked through his IG profile and tried to find things about him that I liked (I basically tried to convince myself that maybe the guy wasn't so bad). But I think that wasn’t successful. And yeah, it was hard to hide that fact for long I think. 

Guy #3 is this random guy that just followed me out of no where and liked a bunch of my photos on IG all at once. He then started commenting on my stories quite a lot. He would leave brief comical comments, and tried to get me to play animal crossing with him. Lol. He tried to start a convo one time but I didn’t reply to it for a few hours, and then found that he deleted it. Lol?? He would then like a few more of my IG pics. He was a bit strange. I wasn’t quite sure if he was trying to show that he was interested, or if he was just bored and wanted more friends. But yeah he doesn’t comment on my stories much anymore.  Now that I’ve gotten those out of the way, just thought I’d go on about my recent thoughts. So lately I’ve been feeling really stuck. I have a quarter-life crisis pretty much every day. I feel like I’ve plateaued, and I’m not really growing much right now. I feel like I need new experiences, new company. Most of the ones I have at the moment aren’t serving me well or helping me become a better person, if I’m honest. And I’m not happy. The company I have right now aren’t encouraging me to level up, or helping me expand my thoughts and horizons. I’ve noticed that a lot of the friends I was close to pre-covid have changed a lot, and so have I, so we’re not really offering much to each other. I’ve become so low energy lately that I find myself trying to avoid or escape dealing with people or situations that I feel aren’t worth my energy. Which I want to start doing more of from now on. I want to be more selective of the people I chose to surround myself with. I also want to find my community or a new community which I can be part of and grow from. Not sure how or where I will find that, but it’s something I’m keen on delving into more as time goes by. I want to be more myself, I want to change up my look, my fashion. I want to expand my knowledge, expand my vocabulary, expand the diversity of ways I talk/present myself or respond/reply to situations. I want to feel like I have something to offer - not only to my future partner, but to the friends I make in this lifetime. I feel like I’m too basic and uninteresting. I feel like I’m also too careful, too slow, too afraid to make mistakes. Too afraid to take risks. I want to stop “complaining about things, but doing nothing about them”. I want to be confident in myself, no matter what I feel that I am. If that makes sense. I want to speak more clearly, slower. I want to be able to speak Filipino fluently. I want to find the career that I love and work in it. I want to work with people that I can genuinely be friends with, not just colleagues or “fake friends”. I want to not care about what people will think about me, and just do me (especially on IG). I want to be unapologetically myself. But before that, I want that self to be the kind of self I aspire to be. Can you want to be different, but also want to just be yourself at the same time? Can someone confirm this? 

[fmdbomi-blog]

Lmaooo it’s your favorite dumb bitch Oli back at it again with a revamped version of Bomi. As always, I don’t have a plots page, but I will be putting some plot ideas at the bottom of this intro post for us to work with. You can find her profile here if you want to know more about her! Like this if you’d like to plot~

Bomi has two siblings, a brother and a sister. Both are involved in the music industry. (If any of you are thinking about bringing in a new muse and want a sibling connection hmu~~)

Her mother is a vocal trainer for singers and her father is a music producer for a top tier record label.

Her parents weren’t the best or most loving parents towards her and her siblings. They were extremely harsh on them and wanted to make sure that they were always the best of the best. If they brought home anything less than an A, they were physically punished by them.

Her parents treatment towards her caused her to began to lash out and be really rebellious through her teen years. She started hanging out with the wrong crowd and her getting in trouble, and her parents tried to control her, but that only made her lash out ever more. Her and her parents still have a rocky relationship to this day about that.

Her whole family’s good looking, so it wasn’t surprised when she was scouted out for her visuals when she was fourteen years old. The man offered her a spot as a trainee at Gold Star, which was just formed that year. Her parents were a little hesitant because they didn’t want her to join a company that hadn’t made a name for itself yet, but once they heard that CEO Bang was the one who founded the company, they were more than happy to sign the consent form for her.

She threw herself into training and started working hard. She debuted as the main rapper and lead vocalist for Aria back in 2011, and she’s been with them ever since 

Ever since she’s been knighted as the main rapper of Aria, she’s been becoming more and more invested in it, and she wants to develop her skills and grow as a rapper. Back in 2015, Gold Star allowed her to go on Show Me the Money, where she lasted for three episodes (a lot longer than most people thought she would). She was ripped apart by netizens during her time on the show, and it was embarrassing to her how quickly her time on the show came to an end, but she took it as a learning experience and she’s been perfecting her craft ever since. 

She doesn’t do much outside work away from the group, but now that she’s twenty six (internationally, twenty-seven in Korea) and Aria are established as a whole, she wants to start exploring other avenues, like solo releases, acting, modeling and mc’ing.

Personality wise, she has a nice balance of niceness and meanness, if that makes sense? She has a sarcastic and darker sense of humor, but she has a very kind heart. She’s of course a little closed off and wary of some people because of what she’s been through.

Plot Ideas~

Childhood friends! If there are any muses who grew up in Seoul or spent their childhood in Seoul, Bomi could use all the childhood friends she can get!

Relatives! Cousins and close family friends are all welcomed and very much so appreciated!

Someone that Bomi met while she was a trainee and formed a good bond with (must have been a gold star trainee between 2009-2011)

Someone that Bomi met while she was a trainee and formed a negative bond with (must have been a gold star trainee between 2009-2011)

On-again/off-again flings! Open to all genders!

Exes that ended on bad terms

Exes that ended on good terms

Someone that she goes to when she’s having nightmares and they let her spend the night with them.

Non “idol” rappers who help her better her rapping skills.

Non vocal position holding muses that she helps with their singing

Hoobaenims that she’s taken under her wing and is mentoring

An awkward relationship because she’s your muse’s sunbaenim, but she’s younger than them at the same time. (must be older than a 93 liner, but debuted after 2011)

A best friend and confidant for Bomi

Bomi is your muse’s bias in Aria

Your muse is Bomi’s bias in their group

Another female idol with a lead vocal position that the media and fans pit against Bomi

Bomi and your muse used to be really close friends, but they had a serious falling out and now things are tense and awkward between them

Bomi and your muse used to not be able to stand each other, but now they’ve become very close friends

Just a pair of buds who traipse around Seoul between the hours of 12am and 5am, hitting up 24hr convenience stores and takeout places and eating to their heart’s content while ignoring their outside problems or venting about them

93 liners group chat!

Fans love to ship your muse and Bomi with one another (open to any gender!)

Bomi and your muse actually dated one another in the past and it was leaked out to the public. They were met with support from fans, but a huge backlash from netizens and their company (or companies if your muse isn’t under gold star) made them break up.

Bomi and your muse are incredibly close to one another, but because of differing schedules, they rarely get to see one another. Most of their communication is done through messaging, but when they do get together in person, it’s always a fun time.

Someone who dismisses Bomi as an idol rapper and gives her the motivation to push herself harder and become a better rapper.

Someone who was apart of the bad crowd Bomi ran around with when she was in school.

Someone who tried to get her away from that bad crowd when she was in school, and they’ve been friends ever since. 

[unproduciblesmackdown]

Hi!! So this is an honest question so i hope it doesnt come off as rude or anything- but doesn't the thought that everything you post here can be reblogged make you more reserved or anything? Idk how to explain it but whenever i wanna post something here i think about doing it for a super long time to be sure i want it to possibly be on the internet forever- but i see you're comfortable with sharing pretty personal stuff so i was just wondering if it affected you any way or maybe it was just me?

lmaooo it’s cool!!! there’s an unending AMA going on here and off the top of my head i can’t think of anything off-limits to ask about

it’s definitely not just you!! out of the ppl i know off the top of my head i’m probably really far and away doing the Most airing my bullshit. if you ultimately don’t like the idea of stuff just kinda sitting around to be seen by Anyone, that’s valid and there’s no problem with feeling like that makes you wanna Not Post some stuff

like this is especially true for young teens on the soche media…hell i just entirely threw out the blog i’d had from like 14 -18, and not because i was particularly embarrassed or anything, it just felt mostly obsolete. you can become someone so different in even one year and that’s fine and you might not want Old Venting and the like just sitting around out there. it’s definitely okay to be real private about that kinda stuff

i know sometimes ppl having sorta Compromises where maybe they’ll create a second blog / account specifically for talking abt personal stuff, and then only maybe allow friends (or nobody) to access it; or people will just tag everything with Delete Later and then go back and delete it later so it’s not out there forever, or just because they find it embarrassing soon afterwards lol

for my part, there’s definitely multiple reasons i pretty much don’t care

1. i never used to Vent post back in the early days. but one of my earliest examples maybe was this sudden essay i dumped on my blog when i was 16? 17? abt how unhappy i was at home. it took me till i was 18 to really start to realize that what i’d always lived with was literally abuse, and it was things like The Sudden Venting Essay that really helped me put it all into words and be able to organize my thoughts enough to write about it and realize that there was a lottttt of shit i was rly miserable about2. ever since then really i’ve found that when i write about something, whether messaging it to someone or just posting it in general, a ton of times it helps me kinda make connections or figure something out or just feel like i have a better grasp on an idea.3. even after i started maybe doing the occasional venting post, for a long time i was really hesitant about it, but this was mostly b/c i felt like i didn’t have ~real~ enough problems and/or nobody would really care. as for the former, well yesterday i was saying how i still have this underlying feeling that i’m an imposter / don’t count / not REALLY as ___ as other people or whatever, so i’m still working on that, but it definitely doesn’t upset me as much as it might back in the day. re: the latter—tbh i dont care if nobody cares. i write abt personal shit b/c i care. my entire blog is About and Because i care, and if other people care, great, if they don’t, ok.4. a lot of this is about having compassion for myself. i don’t look down on other people for making personal posts, so i don’t look down on myself, either. 5. more self-compassion: there’s probably olden text posts from the early days of this blog that don’t even sound like me coz my Outer Demeanor has changed a lot these past 5 or 2 or 1 yrs. but even if i stumbled across some Old Post of mine and was like “lmfao whats up w THIS loser” it’s like….well, i’m sympathetic to my Earlier Selves. this applies to like, me never deleting Late Night Sad Posts or whatever (even tho nowadays they’re never exactly like i’m upset, maybe just Melancholy or in a mood to talk abt something saddish) coz i’m like, well, even though rn i don’t feel like i Need this post, back then i did feel like venting to feel better! and that’s fine. i don’t find that embarrassing. it’s like if you’re thirsty on one day and you drink some water and at some random point during the next evening when you’re not thirsty you think back on that time you were drinking water and you’re like “wow, embarrassing.” well clearly its not a perfect analogy but the point is sometimes you might feel you need to talk, and sometimes you don’t, and both times are ok. its not an embarrassment to have been upset6. this blog is the most personal thing in the world for me lmao its my Main social media presence, goes back five yrs, and for like. well the whole five years its been what keeps me from being way more isolated than i am. irl friends have been long distance this whole time (save a couple exceptions) and mostly my way to talk to ppl has been on here. this was especially important when i was at my parents house for a couple yrs. it was fairly awful and being able to be in touch w ppl and being able to SAY it was awful was clearly important, and i became more inclined to write abt shit rather than hold myself back b/c my being able to say anything was important7. i still talk about things b/c being able to say anything here to people in the outside world is important8. i can’t be like “i cant talk abt this b/c its not important/interesting enough” coz if i did i wouldn’t talk abt anything. i just write b/c i have things to say, and this is my pointless blog9. i don’t expect i’ll ever become Well Known in any circles. for me the more likely concern is kinda disappearing either due to dying or incarceration or some other shit scenario. the times i talk on here are good b/c that hasnt happened yet and i have the option10. even if i did become well known, i don’t really care.11. also for uh…all the times i was living in my parents house thru my life i was really really isolated. for eons i was used to nobody knowing shit abt me and keeping p much all my thoughts to myself. nowadays this blog is what lets me be able to sorta Known and Seen and able to get in touch w ppl if we wanna. basically, there’s nothing TOO personal. i’m not even trying to push myself to “overshare” coz like i said, p much nothing is offlimits. i’ve just had a lifetimes worth of being very invisible and unknown to anyone12. actually i can still be very cagey abt myself in person. learning to be more open On Here is a bit helpful for that. 13. idk that anyone else would give a shit about old vent posts from me either. when i talk abt me im talking abt *me*, its really not even vaguely interesting when removed even one degree from that specific context. 14. maybe there’s the chance some shit will happen to be Relatable to other ppl and somehow helpful to them15. for example, a lot of how i realized i was actually experiencing abuse for real was thru anecdotal / qualitative posts abt it. sometimes there’s shit you think is Just You only b/c nobody else who it applies to is talking about it yknow16. maybe making it seem less a big deal to talk abt your bullshit if i unapologetically talk abt my bullshit17. i remember my younger self feeling like i didnt ~deserve~ to talk abt my own thoughts & feelings the way other ppl did coz mine weren’t as good, so i kinda do it for them / in celebration of no longer feeling that way18. i actually like to talk. i just usually can’t. irl i very very very very rarely talk at length about myself, i don’t talk much at all. for me this is where i get to talk19. hmm i may have skipped or forgotten something obvious but hey. for now, there’s this. no-limits milo they call me

[lucasluvia]

Yall this goes out to those two friends who heckin ATTACKED me during my p2 spare?? Literally i cried. Ppl are too nice,, what the heck.

"You may not be a main character in your life, but you're one in ours" -my friend

Heck ive decided friends are cancelled because they're too nice to me and i almost never vent but when i do they pull this shit they suck so much lmaooo

[judeharoldvich]

ok idk if you were looking for real advice or just venting but!! the main idea for first date clothes is comfortable but cute. jeans and a nicer shirt is perfect! something that is easy/nice/comfortable to wear, but also would be good for a low stakes picture day. like the last ask with food - prioritize what makes you feel good. even if it isn’t the super nicest outfit, you feeling more at ease will make it look nicer cause you’ll feel nicer.

also shoes you can walk in!! never know when the date might involve walking around after a meal as an excuse to spend more time with them, or running from how horrible it was - either way shoes to walk in

yess shoes to walk in all the way. mainly cause i own 1 pair of shoes and theyre trainers lmaooo

currently running out jeans bc they keep splitting at the crotch (too much whorishness on my part i suppose) so Hopefully my ripped skinny jeans will suffice. I have an abundance of hawaiian shirts and i think those are niceish?? i consider them Semi Smart Semi Casual so.

i am going to look like SUCH a millennial disney bound dad vlogger but im living for it. thank u anon!!