#so many tags for reach LMAO

[inlovewithairy]

i am once again promoting the system skatepark

we're at 70+ members!! i wanna try get to 100 by monday!

(anti endo, anti misinfo, pro recovery system only safe space)

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

Hi? Gosh how do I even start with this :'D

I know it's been ages since I've last popped up on here. I've been debating when to post this for a while, but I kept adding to my draft more and more and now it's the end of JULY omgg I felt so guilty disappearing with zero updates but then thought my birthday would be the best day to finally address this considering it'll feel less random? idk but Ive always celebrated my bday with you guys and I'd feel so bad answering your kind asks without me at least explaining why I was gone for months.

Truth be told, I was dealing with a lot of stuff irl. health issues and sudden declining grades that left me stumped and drained for months now- along with technical issues like having to replace some parts of my computer that took a while for me to find to even draw digitally, which I didn't have the time for anyway with how tired and weary I felt every day.

I'm frankly shaken up by a lot of shit rn and I don't know how to be active online with this burden on my chest- Especially as it's been a while since I've even looked at utmv related content and my motivation dwindled. I swear I'd hype myself up to post or reblog something- but I'd see just how much I've missed or the overwhelming amount of posts I'd need to go through and I'd feel so swamped with exhaustion and most importantly guilt, for not clearing the air up sooner to reassure you guys that I'm, y'know, alive, and not dead in a ditch somewhere. And I'd procrastinate cause typing it all out is hard and I'd give up halfway every time and it's just not fair to you all!

I thought I was handling it well when I started going out and socializing more, instead of staying cooped up at home on my computer all day. and in the first draft of this post I made months ago I was gonna detail some of the fun plans I had, for my life and for this blog :D but relaxing my strict study schedule and letting go a bit of my tight routine, thinking it was better than wringing myself dry to keep it up, backfired horribly, to say the least.

I know right?? so silly to be hung up on stupid shit like studies of all things! but this is a very important thing for me considering my career plans and the competitivity encouraged by everyone I'm surrounded by, the pressure of keeping up adding to my already stressful days. I had to fix myself up first and I couldn't handle the strain nor interact with people and thinking of jobs and exams sapped my energy so much it's frankly embarrassing. writing this feels so cheesy too and it frustrates me to know I could've come back a month earlier if it weren't for that, but I also know putting all of this into words then would just sound like incoherent venting (not that this is very different tbf) and I wasn't in the right headspace to address my absence, or anything really- I didn't want everyone to see me return when I couldn't muster up a genuinely positive message, let alone talk to anyone with a shadow of my usual cheer

I feel like a complete mess and It drives me up the wall how depressed I've gotten. I debated deleting this blog so many times 'cause the fear of disappointing my audience and my friends, for lack of a more fitting sentiment, made me feel even shittier. I'm constantly thinking if this wall of text is worth posting, or if it's better not to burden you all with all my sappy troubles as if it's the end of the world. Trust me, I'll be fine. I'm not trying to dramatize this situation, but I don't think I'm up to pretending I'm all sunshine and enthusiasm you're all accustomed to.

So sorry for worrying you all! I'll try to catch up, deliver some missed birthday gifts, and answer some asks while I'm at it! Again, I can't state how much I appreciate your support throughout the years. It's frankly a miracle I kept any of you around with how much I keep popping and leaving at random with no warning. I definitely can't promise for my stay to be without a hitch, and if you don't mind an inconsistent schedule you're free to stay of course, but I'm afraid I can't sustain the pace I had when I first started this blog. I'll keep posting art, but lower my activity in the fandom sphere to reduce the strain on my mental health. so fewer rants and walls of text, more art, and less stress overall. Love you all and thanks for waiting for this long <3

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

request for playlists!

as i am about to finish s3 and begin s4, i feel that i am at a place in which i can enhance my morning commute by putting on txf playlists. so if anyone has spotify playlist recs... pls feel free to drop a link <3

i mean obviously i still have a WHILE to go, but!!! i am well-established at this point. i love individual character playlists AND ship playlists! i love playlists that are “fox mulder would certainly listen to these songs” and playlists that are “these songs are literally about MSR and Phoebe Bridgers CLEARLY was watching season 3 when she penned this"

[lavenoon]

bh!Eclipse "asked to reach the top shelf" meets "can't reach the lowest cupboards without folding like a paperclip" - @clxckwork-sun-n-moon

Yeah, I mean, there's a reason SI is laughing here after Eclipse "gets on his level" - man's too tall, he'd need to lie down to get close

But shenanigans are so very fun, so:

vs

It's called symbiosis <3

bloodstain fool by naffeclipse and og detective au by sunnys-aesthetic!

[non-plutonian-druid]

babies!

i hope none of you thought i *wouldnt* be making centaur delores. As usual, her level of realness is ambiguous but it's a silly au so the answer can be "very" if that's what floats your boat. Also, note that she's taller than five is. that's what we in the business call "foreshadowing"

[ID: Two drawings of baby apocalypse five and real person! delores as centaurs. In the first, they are both standing looking at each other. Five is looking skeptical; almost, for example, as if he ran into another person in an empty wasteland where he was expecting everyone to be dead. Delores is smiling mischievously, because she knows she's about to make a friend. In the second image, Delores is rolling around on the ground with her horse legs going everywhere. Since her horse half is a foal, this is a lot of legs to be going everywhere. Five has his hands on his hips as he looks down at her. In both, Five is wearing an apocalypse survival outfit, while Delores is wearing a cute top. End ID.]

[james-spooky]

this is a test

[gremzon]

I might have OCD actually

[cuteniaarts]

Digitalised + coloured + redesigned version of my Suiren and Vaatu sketch from two days ago, as promised!!

Coming up with Suiren’s design was a very long process of trying and failing because after you’ve drawn 9+ different versions of one character, the creativity starts to run a little dry, but I’m actually really proud of this one, she looks absolutely adorable <3

(Also yeah I did mostly just scribble Vaatu’s pattern because who has the energy to draw the all out accurately. Not me, that’s who, I’m chronically tired. People who draw him on the regular have my utmost respect. He’s still a funky little guy though :D)

Bonus, Raava incessantly screaming inside Suiren (and being completely ignored because Suiren is tired of her) while all this is happening:

[jamiethebeeart]

Sketches

[coridallasmultipass]

well one of family never ends' author's other fics is the epilogue of course ;) but ipgd also wrote people don't do that (alphacest), homestuck watches boku no pico, and like the first uucest fic

YAASS OMG.

ANON.

Thank you.

Deeply and truly thank you. Saved me a real pain. It was People Don't Do That. Gonna reread it ASAP. I don't remember if I read the uucest one, but I powered thru a lot of fics while I was sick in Jan, and I don't remember like 90% of those two weeks. (Like, as I'm going thru the tag I'm reading now, I'll see something unclicked and go to read it, finish the fic like OMG SO GOOD, and then scroll a little more and I see my name at the top of the kudos list and it's like, wait, when tf did I read this? It was when I was sick.)

Ughhhh. I ADORE the dynamic of whichever younger Strider being the instigator, and it fits Alphacest so deliciously. (I don't even know what to say here without being so fucking overtly horny for Alpha Dave in general but that's not new lmao.)

But seriously, the scene on the roof where Dirk took Dave's underwear, like. I died. There's no other way to put it. It fucking killed me. I'm going to remember that forever, it was so good.

[vagueconfusion]

You're getting a bass this weekend? Sick. What kind if you don't mind me asking?

It's pretty dependent on what ones are available at the store, I'd like to try to get one secondhand (some people say you feel closer to instruments you buy new? But for years I learned and played on a secondhand saxophone and loved the instrument dearly) so it depends on what's there and the price. Hopefully there's something in my price range because I'll need an amp too. I also, uh, have no clue how to play a bass, so I figure I'll start on an inexpensive-but-decent one and see how it goes from there?

I read up a bit and saw good things about some Squier Classic Vibe and Ibanez SR300 for beginners, Yamaha in general too. I'm not picky about the brand right now, I figure I'll get a more nuanced opinion as I learn and figure out what sound I want? One reason I want to go to the store is so I can try to get my hands on some to hear the sound of them, and choose from there.

[vshushmshu]

UP AND DOWN AND UP AND DOWN AND AANYYTHING I DO IS NOOO SINNNNNNNN !!!!

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

lies on the floor and stares at the ceiling about how lorien and the garde kids are the ultimate example of 'you inherit your parents' trauma but you will never fully understand it'

[crokitheloki]

ok I need help because my impulsive ass just bought new yarn to start a new project except idk what to do because I have like four other crochet projects. so instead of being overwhelmed with all my options I'm gonna ask tumblr to help me figure out what to do. I can't just work on one cause my brain doesn't work like that so top 2 will be the ones I focus on until I finish a project!

Option 1: dress with these two colors (I have to finish another cup and then I can start working on the skirt)

Option 2: dress/shirt with this yarn (this is the new yarn that I just got)

Option 3: blanket with this yarn (featuring my warriors bookshelf and my baby photo book)

Option 4: shirt/tube top with purple yarn (this is my longest running project oops)

Option 5: my mood blanket that I am incredibly behind on (I don't have a picture sorry)

in the meantime I'm gonna start what I want and then depending on the outcome I'll stop whichever ones lose

[sandpapersnowman]

anyway though I saw my coworker and met her new adopted kid today and when my coworker hugged me she said "heyyy, girlfriend!" and the new kid was immediately like ? she doesn't look like a girl?

and instead of being weird about it my coworker went "no, she doesn't, does she!" and he proceeded to spend their whole appointment hanging out with me to let me know I'm pretty and "your face looks like a girl but your hair looks like a boy"

like 😭💖💖💖💖

[smol-tired-binch-blog]

Sometimes I think I must consume media wrong because I don't remember The Lottery by Shirley Jackson fucking me up

Like sure I read it and was like 'wait hang on, what- oh dear.' but I didn't have the 'Dude That Was So Fucked Up I Am Fundamentally Changed As A Person' experience everyone else apparently had

And that ain't a flex btw this ain't a "oh I can read the most fucked up stuff and feel NOTHING" kinda bullshit I just. Wasn't that deeply affected lmao