#so idk what im gonna listen to
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been listening to a (very fascinating) nonfiction book for two days and my brain is clawing for some fun and whimsy
#the nf book is Because Internet by Gretchen McCulloch#and it is really cool to learn about linguistics and the way language changes and specifically how it's changed in the last 30 years#and how the shift in written language in particular is being documented in a way we haven't been able to achieve#like i love it! i do!#lots of things i never really considered but having them pointed out i See It#great time highly recommend!#my brain however needs a good time#so idk what im gonna listen to#ks has a book tag#ks talks
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the thing about trying to recommend fiction podcasts to someone who isn't familiar with them is that not only are so so many genres represented but also the level of production can fall anywhere from "basically an audiobook" to "major motion picture minus the pictures"
#original#idk just something i think about sometimes#you can read a description to get a sense of the genre/plot/vibe but you truly dont know What exactly youre getting into till you listen#with nonfiction podcasts it tends to be easier to get a read on whether its gonna be like. some buddies fucking around with a mic#or more like a whole documentary#or with fiction books there can be different framings but the actual makeup of the thing is almost always the same#idk what im saying at this point i need to stop putting so much bullshit in tags#whatever#audio drama
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logan 2017 movie canon divergent au kinda.. kurt deus ex machina, everybody lives, happy family = profit
#never read the comics so im purely going off of movie(ish) canon kind of so ermm use ur imagination idk#this isnt movie kurt tho since i didnt really care for movie kurt and idk what happened to him sooo..hes whatever kurt u want him 2 be#movie divergence w established comic friendship if you will#basically an au where logan and kurt somehow miraculously run into each other and nothing bad happens<3#LIKE A STONE BY AUDIOSLAVE is definitely their song for this au...i was listening to it on loop the whole time while drawing this#laura gets another dad 2 electric boogaloo#x men#xmen#x men comics#kurt wagner#nightcrawler#logan howlett#wolverine#james logan howlett#logurt#nightwolves#was gonna draw more for this au but nah nvm probably not..*throws this out from my drafts and makes yall fetch*
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[ID: A digital comic in two images of Samama Khalid and Celia Ripley from The Magnus Protocol on a gray background. Sam is a fat South Asian man with short, curly black hair, and a mustache and small goatee, and he is wearing a turtleneck, a cardigan, black nail polish and small black earrings. Celia is a slim Korean woman with short black hair, and she is wearing a button down shirt, a vest, rectangular glasses, an x-shaped earring, an industrial piercing, and snakebite studs. Sam is colored in solid red, and Celia is colored in solid green.
The first image is three drawings of Sam. The first is of him looking up pleadingly with his hands clasped and his eyes large and sparkly with sparkles around his head saying "Ahem, please?" The second is him holding up two tickets and smiling, saying "Ta-da! These incredibly exclusive, hardly-discounted, barely obstructed theatre tickets?" The last is him holding up the tickets to himself to read them and saying "I don't really know much about it, I just thought-" His eyes are drawn as dots in the last one.
The second image is of Celia smiling down at him with half-lidded eyes and an amused and slightly scheming smile. She is blushing lightly with a thought bubble next to her with partially blocked out text reading "I need to (blank) him and (blank blank) him until he (blank)". The censored parts also contain pink hearts on the black censor bars. end ID]
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thinkin bout that one bit. i love him <3 celia you need to kiss his silly little face or i will
#fg's art#the magnus protocol#tmagp#samama khalid#celia ripley#ripsam#that's what im going with for now for the shipname akjlshdakldh#suggestive#i guess?? idk how to tag this augh#this was the awkward silly sam celia thing from that poll btw <3#every time i listen to that scene i am just. banging my hands into my desk he's so CUUUUTE I'M GONNA EAT HIM ALIVE#HIS TAP-DANCING FOAL CHARM. HIS BABY SHRIMP SWAG#celia you need to do this for me please girlie treat him RIGHT or I WILL
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Kokichi, similar to Noritoshi in the sense that they're analytical and kinda tsun, but that's mostly it. This is another Megumi and Noritoshi situation where, on the surface, they appear to be very similar, but you squint and realize they're extremely different.
Whereas Noritoshi isn't as bold because he still holds remnants of pride, Kokichi is just shy about it since it's so new. He won't back down from it, just hesitate.
[Long ass rambles under the cut! + bonus doodles.]
When referring to shyness, Kokichi leans into the awkward and stiff type. There's always confusion and slight fear in his eyes when he's experiencing something new or romantic. He doesn't want to mess up, but if he does, he just hopes it works in his favor.
Being born in a body where he was under constant pain and stress, someone touching him was the last thing he wanted. He'd never known the loving touch of another because the heavens decided he wasn't allowed to.
After meeting you, that yearning to be next to you became too much. To hell with his restrictions. He'd to do whatever it takes to be able to be with you even if he had to sacrifice others to do it.
In retrospect, he feels like he should've done it sooner. Being touched or even grazed doesn't feel like his skin is falling off anymore.. Plus having both arms and working legs is always a good thing. It's new and odd, but not terrible. His mind never once wandered back and regretted those he's thrown under the bus because why would it?
Unfortunately, when his body was being healed, Mahito made him healthy.. and that's all. Knowing Mahito, he'd leave Kokichi to struggle with catching up to the rest of his peers by working for his own stamina, weight, and strength from square one. Though Kokichi isn't complaining much about it. He'd still take this rather than being stuck in that god forsaken tub for a second longer.
He used to hate being fussed over because of his illness. He prefers to do things on his own and now he can. Yet, Kokichi still gets pitiful looks on other's faces when he's too weak to carry something. It makes him want to spit at them, he can use Mechamaru to do his heavy lifting for now. He doesn't need a beefed up body to do it.
Unless you're the "beefed up" one fussing over him.. He doesn't mind it when it's you. In fact, Kokichi feels grateful when it's you, endeared even. He never feels belittled or pitiful when its you.. Only you.
Judging by how he treated panda for having the ability to interact with others in person despite being a cursed corpse, Kokichi has a number of insults and creative verbal abuse he's ready to spew out once someone tries getting a little too close to you. Scratch that, he's rude in general to those he isn't familiar with.
Kokichi has a lot of anger for those he deems ungrateful. What do you expect from someone who thought he was gonna rot in a bathtub for the rest of his life to do? Not harbor resentment? Luckily, he holds just as much, if not more, love for you who he's unbelievably grateful for!
Your affection is so odd to him, a new experience that he never knew he could grow to yearn for. It's not terrible, quite the opposite. It's so wonderful he can't get enough. Every time you're around, he wants to have at least one hand on you at all times. Doesn't matter where, just as long as he feels you're around. Safe to say, he's extremely touch starved.
Oh how Kokichi would drop everything for a walk with you. He'd use every Mechamaru he had just to make sure no one disturbs either of you. Murder is just a side effect if they get too persistent. He just wants to spend time with you!
Though he likes walks, he still gets out of breath easily. Walking is nice, but he still needs time to get used to it. Offering to help will only cause him to lean against you, it's not too difficult, he doesn't weigh much for better or worse. He loves when you lend him a hand, it's just another reason to get close to you.
When you part, it's only natural that Kokichi gifts you a little trinket he made. Rejecting it will only reward you with the most devastated frown, so just accept it. If you get rid of it when coming home, it somehow always finds its way back to you? Destroying it will lead to Kokichi giving you another one.
Yes, it follows and watches you, but it's just to keep you safe! Who knows what could happen. Whether or not the little trinkets are subtle, all depends on how you reacted to him asking if it was alright to know your location at all times when he's not around. Kokichi is understanding if you're not okay with it. He'll just make his gifts extra subtle so you wont know he's watching.
He just wants to be by your side constantly, even if he's not able to be there in person. Watching you through a screen gives him a sickly familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach, but it's better than not knowing what you're doing. He can even pick up little things about you this way for when he sees you next time! This is nothing but a win-win in his mind even if others beg to differ.
Kokichi never felt blessed. Not once since the day he was born, not until he found you. You who he feels is truly a gift from the heavens. You who he would give up everything to have. In a way, Kokichi is delusional. He sees you as the reason he got a heavenly restriction. It was as if other worldly forces tried to keep him at bay from pursuing you, but you're also the reason he broke his restrictions. He now has the body he wished for thanks to you, his drive, his motivation, his purpose, his love.
[extra shit]
Kokichi’s so fucking low key about being a chuunibyou. you're telling me he named his mech after an anime he watched. half his attacks have ultimate or ultra in the name.. HE MADE A FUCKING MECH. Your ass can't tell me he didn't watch anime while growing up and got inspired to make it a reality. He probably watched Evangelion or something.. Woah, anime dates with him where he makes your favorite creature and uses it to his advantage.. woah.
[Bonus Kokichi verbal abuse]
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#kokichi muta#muta kokichi#kokichi muta x reader#muta kokichi x reader#mechamaru#mechamaru x reader#jjk x reader#welcome mob kun to the cult.. im so sorry that you have to be our sacrificial lamb to these psycho's bullying#tl;dr kokichi is a little shy bc everythin is new but hes still open to everythin. hes just an obsessive freak for you ykyk#i love kokichi.......... dont you love him?? hes so good bro#can you see how hard im snorting copium to make up my au where hes alive#i had to put some yan into him BUT LISTEN TO ME IM NOT EVEN TRYING TO MAKE HIM A FREAK BRO#HES LITERALLY JUST LIKE THAT AND ITS SUCH A SHAME ITS NOT USED MORE#“there was someone who i loved. and i didnt care what happened to the world as long as i could be by her side and protect her”#“even if that girl didnt want me to be the one to protect her.”#HE WAS DOWN TO SACRIFICE THE WORLD?? MF HUH?? YOU WERE GONNA BETRAY EVERYONE BC YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD FIGHT. WIN. AND FIX IT??#AND YOU WOULD FR STILL BE THERE EVEN IF THE ONE YOU LOVED DIDNT LIKE YOU BACK???#DUDE?????#WHAT THE FCUK KOKICHI WHAT THE FUCKKKKK#ong idk if theres a handful of kokichi enjoyers out there or its one person asking for him specifically but i see you...#i'll feed you my starving cult member.....#THIS IS THE ONE I POSTED ON ACCIDENT SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY AND MISHAP ANON. I LOVE YOU.#shout out to salsamander who caught me slacking#im not sorry for the LowTierGod reference#null rot
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"if we make america worse and more of a dictatorship that will be even harder to unravel and make it the way we want the country to be, maybe then everyone will join our Glorious Revolution!" bb girl you cant even be in the same room with someone who thinks you should vote, how in tf do you think you're gonna unite people to fight in The Revolution with you? it's gonna be you and your 5 friends, i hate to break it to you.
#i dont think you realize how repelling you and your politics are to everyone else#you get all of your validation for how Smart You Are from your friends and ignore any kind of feedback that suggests you should#change or do something differently. thats the only reason you're so convinced average people will go along with you bc you keep getting#affirmation from the people who ALREADY agree with you- but you have NO IDEA how to bridge the gap between people who agree#with you and disagree with you. you're horrible at convincing people of your side of things outside of straight up guilt tripping them#or bullying them like a highschooler. im sorry but the tools you learned to survive with as a kid aren't gonna help you in this situation.#the ONLY THING you can come up with to bridge that gap is a bloody revolution. thats how bad you are at this.#and you're also so bad at this and unimaginative that you dont even realize how THAT might not even be enough.#you cant imagine ANY kind of avenue to getting people to change AT ALL outside of blood and fire. and thats why people call you#an authoritarian.#i'll be honest- i really do think the world would be a better place if we did incremental change under a democratic president who wont#set the world on fire vs the godkingemperor republican WHO WONT EVEN LISTEN TO YOU AT ALL EVER AND MIGHT KILL YOU#FOR PUTTING UP A STINK. idk if you noticed but if that evil fuck gets into office we are severely outnumbered if he gets police#n shit to go after his own citizens. letting trump win is making this battle so much harder than it needs to be.#you are choosing trying to fix the world while its exploding vs trying to fix it before it explodes at all.#what is this like a procrastination thing? you wanna wait till the last minute to try? idfgi. wtf is wrong with you#throwing minority lives away to prove a point. and then you try to tell me you care. gtfoh.#accelerationists should never be taken seriously.
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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]
saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS#REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT#NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS#THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of#another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her#idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had#when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think#i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that#AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE#I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME#THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE#WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL#in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad#this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi#gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show#i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM
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daily affirmations: im the shit
#homestuck#hom3stuck#home24uck#home2t4ck#dirk strider#jake english#dirkjake#admin draws#fanart#can someone power wash my brain ive gotten addicted to the shoe commercial song again#and 2nd one is not related. well now it is. but it was supposed to be its own thing#i ended up not liking the sketch enough for how much trouble it gave me so its going up like this#sweep ur bf off ur feet (flying edition)#anywayz. 1st one done in an hour while listening to something on repeat. no prize for guessing what#im at my vacation now so its gonna be backlog for a little while until i get my bearings#its a tradition by now to draw fullbody walkies while listening to hip hop so who knows. i might do more of that#now i sleep for tomorrow i go shopping#today i packed spent 4 hrs in a cramped car. had a swim a pint some real good canned tuna for dinner. truly life is good#and i cant wait to sleep on this mood so i can wake up feeling different tomorrow#it hasnt quite been dread latwly except when it has. but idk#i remember id used to wake up and not feel like im in a pressure cooker set on medium to low#its been a year. id like to know that feeling again
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Hey. Just sat down and realized that Endeavor spent 23 years terrorizing his family. Even if you say he was a good person for a good while (which, I mean. He still bought his wife so.) then at least 15 years based on Shouto's age.
15 years spent abusing and terrorizing and hurting and breaking his family and. Nothing. No consequence. He got everything he wanted, being Number 1. He's still a good person in the eyes of everyone. His family are still around him. He is still popular and liked and rich and. The only hitch there is his own son (whom he caused the death of). But that son is considered 'insane' by everyone so no one even deigns to actually listen to him so what's the point? Endeavor got everything he wanted.
Just thinking about it.. it doesn't make me angry per se, but just empty I guess. 15 years. And he just got off scot free.
23 years or 15, does it really matter?
#thinking about it just makes me..hopeless i guess?#idk how to explain it#but it feels like a weight on my heart#i dont think this post accurately expresses how i feel but whatever#anti endeavor#anti enji todoroki#anti todoroki enji#endeavor bashing#look if youre going to defend him dont even bc im not gonna listen to you anyway#bnha critical#mha critical#i laid in bed and thought 23 years. 23 years. what the hell#its just..so unfair
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Collection of WIPs for my newest honkai 3rd AU: a synth- and post-punk band AU! featuring the band “Mirror Mirage”
More art and an explanation further below
I dont want to put too many details down yet since i intend to do more with this and don’t necessarily want to spoil future story stuff, but the gist of it is that its an AU focused on the villainous Herrscher personas (except Veli, but she fits the vibe lol)
The tentative setting I’m working with for now is Central Florida and its meant to be a more serious/realistic AU with a focus on young adult life, not late-teens stuff. Think less “fun times at Perfect Fairytale College(TM) with my besties! Lets have fun and study today!” and more “rent is due, my roommates are assholes, the hourly bus is 20 minutes late again, and i almost got hit by a drunk driver on my way to work for the third time week and it’s only Tuesday”. That sort of thing lmao
I’m not sure if there’s any real interest in a story that focuses more on some underrated characters like Herrscher Mei (not normal Mei as a Herrscher, but her alternate persona), much less a story that also deals with more serious IRL issues
Mei is bassist and a vocalist, formerly lead until Kiana (more precisely HoV in Honkai terms) joined; Mei also handles the finances as she is an accountant in her day job working at a community redevelopment agency. Has a strong sense of justice and puts on an air of confidence and superiority on stage and when fending off hostile folks, but acts with great humility with the ordinary people she encounters in her daily life.
Kiana is the (new) lead vocalist. Works the graveyard shift at a gas station and is a self-proclaimed “cynical asshole” that barely gets along with anyone else; also plays the guitar occasionally. She was dragged in by Mei and reluctantly joined the band, leading to an awkward and tense relationship with the others, but her incredible skill as a vocalist means the rest of them put up with her shitty attitude.
Seele is the lead guitarist; she is an immigrant from Estonia and came to the US with Elysia a couple years back, in early 2022. Keeps in touch w/ Bronya, who is still living back in Europe. Tends to be a bit withdrawn but is very loyal to the band and would throw hands to protect the crew. Seele has Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and is a system comprised of two alters: Saule and Veliona. Veliona is the one that actively plays in the band.
Elysia (HoC in Honkai terms) is the synth player and mixer, and does a lot of work in planning and executing complicated tracks both live and in studio recordings. Despite being having no local heritage, she loves switching between a southern cowgirl persona and her usual preppy nice-girl persona. Since Elysia is said to be from “Vladivostok 51” in Honkai canon, that would make her Russian; however for the purposes of this story im headcanoning her as Ukrainian (which ik is far from Vladivostok irl), simply to mix things up a bit, lol
Fu Hua (Senti in Honkai terms) is the drummer; still a college student, shes a bit of an odd one out in the group, but was there since the beginning and has grown close with the rest. Has a bit of an attitude and says cocky things, but is much more timid at heart and acts a lot more calm with her friends at school.
A huge part of the inspiration for this story is a desire to try and depict the more ordinary aspects of urban life, adding flavor to mundane daily activities without relying on magic or scifi or high-octane action and drama. The villains of the story aren’t comic book supervillains, but rather its the various systems that the characters have to live within- corrupt governance, financial struggle, societal divide, etc.
I also really want to tell a story that emphasizes the queer experience. Not just the usual lovey-dovey girls-love stuff, but what life is actually like for real women in real sapphic relationships when living in the state that passed the infamous “Don’t Say Gay” bill IRL. As much as I love the canon KiaMei relationship in Honkai 3rd, i think it’s hella sanitized and can’t really convey the depth of the history and culture of the LGBTQ+ community. So I’m hoping to address this by placing their relationship in a specific real setting, one where LGBTQ+ folks (including myself) have to fight for our rights, acceptance, and representation.
As for musical inspiration I largely draw from a few big sources: one of the bigger inspirations is ASTROPHYSICS & MINTTT, as well as more recently Chappell Roan; genre influences include rock/punk, synth/EDM, and Sovietwave! This is both inspiration for their vibes and also for what type of music i imagine this band would play
The last image is a more suggestive one but ive hastily and sloppily censored it, so hopefully that is okay with y’all x-x
I rarely make spicier content like this, but having listened to The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess for the first time today and then listening to it 4 more times in a row, I couldn’t help but push the limits of what i usually do just that little bit, lol
#cw suggestive#shout out to anyone that actually recognizes any of the scenes or structures in my crappy little bakcground sketches lmao#y’all dont understand just how much this AU means to me akskkskskskdkc vdcbjhsdgbjid#I love this cast of characters so much and I really think they deserve better than what the story left them with#at least in most cases lol#honkai impact 3rd#honkai 3rd#hi3rd#honkai fanart#honkai impact#kiana kaslana#herrscher of the void#raiden mei#herrscher of thunder#hi3 elysia#honkai elysia#herrscher of corruption#honkai seele#seele vollerei#honkai veliona#fu hua#honkai hua#honkai senti#herrscher of sentience#if i listen to California one more time i think im gonna melt into a puddle of tears and nostalgia and pure yearning#also the final sketch was heavily inspired by Femininomenon and im thinking of adding the chorus as background text#idk if i will yet tho
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someone Help!!! i wanna get into the beatles.. does anyone have any song suggestions or wanna info dump to me or literally anything!! my ask box and dms are open if so 🙏🙏
#eventually ill go thru and listen to each album for now im js going thru playlists ppl have made#but idk whwre to start w like.#everyrhing else#about the actual#Guys#if that makes sense#the fandom on here seems pretty sweet from what ive seen so far...#but yeahh.. ive been wanting to get into them for a few months now#so im gonna finally try to#the beatles#john lennon#paul mccartney#ringo starr#george harrison
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I need people to realize how horrible 'stalking/constant surveillance/breaking into each other's homes is how the Batfamily show love' is. Like i really need someone to just acknowledge how horrific saying this bullshit is.
Like even fics where they're shown as happy and healthy and with good ties, you've always got this thing where none of them have privacy or any boundaries with each other. Which is directly antithetical to actually having good relationships. And this invasion via hacking and stalking and breaking into homes is portrayed as a positive, good thing; it's just how they show love and care to each other, after all. But for some reason I just personally don't find stalking, lack of privacy or boundaries, and emotional manipulation funny, endearing, or healthy, and just end up disgusted at the attempt to sweep it all under the rug.
#my dc posting#dc#batman#batfamily#jason todd#barbara gordon#bruce wayne#dick grayson#tim drake#damian wayne#listen i can only take so much of it before i just breakdown okay#apparently controversial opinion but a family where its normal to vreak into each others homes and manipulate each other and stalk and#invade boundaries and autonomy and privacy can NOT be healthy#no matter how much you try to dress it up all cute w 'this is just how they are' 'its how they show their love' its never not gonna be#unhealthy and bad and toxic#like yeah they do do that. they are like that. either acknowledge it or stop trying to justify it#god this actually irks me so much#i try to idk. suspend my disblief but theres only so much i can actuallt fucking take before just#its just. im trying to read happy fluffy fics. but i cant be comforted by a family that normalizes breaking boundaries n invading privacy#and its specifically that the author aleays disregards it. instead of fixing it or making it better they opt to keep it and come up w excuse#s for it#and thats what actually triggers me#'i broke into ur house cus if i asked if i could come over ud say no' is actuallt fucking horrifying stop trying to make it seem loving???#im writing this while having a panic attack dont mind me 👍#but its like. if you can write the batfam w/o bruce hitting his kids or any other horrific thing that they do#then why must you keep the boundary&privacy breaking? why cant anyone even seemingly try to write a batfam#where theyve worked their issues abt this out best they can n have healthy established boundaries w each other??#like if u can write them all hanging out together 24/7 n bruce being s good dad why is this one simple thing the One Thing#nobody even tries to address properly???#'aw dick broke into jason's saehouse bc he wanted to hangout but jason would say no if he asked' aw. maybe dick should learn 'no means no'
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Come back home when you have some sense
You can throw your life away just not at my expense
You’re not the son I raised
#jhariah#this one just rawrrfrrr#and then uh another line thats like ‘tell me did you raise a man?’#nice#im just listening to the new album to cope with nasty sickness and feeling out of it#god this album is really good it has every emotion in there like this song for example just the part where they scream the chorus its like#hnnnghhh#hm some other moments from the album im liking a lot uhhh i love re: concerns a lot#the part where hes like reading off the complaints and then the part where hes just screaming and its like BAM BAM BAM BAAAM#sasuke is so good and the bit at the end where its like ‘i just want you to know im so so...’#like hes gonna say sorry but cant seem to say the word for whatever reason and i know nothing about sasuke#but i has to imagine the fan girlies are eating gravel over that one lol it gets me#and theres just that like spooky echoing afterwards#the intro to fire4fun goes SOOOOOOOO hard i was losing my shit its awesome#the entirety of trust ceremony is giving me big feelings but specifically that part towards the end where its all quiet and you hear#its like whistling i think? like a marching band is coming in maybe#but it also kinda sounds like nature too and idk i like got a little bit um magical at that part cuz i was driving down a big hill#and it had been raining but there was a clearing in the clouds and the sun was bright and like at this particular hill#you can just see everything like the land stretches for miles theres trees hills the river farms all that shit#and idk with the extreme stress and depression ive been feeling its hard to have these moments where life seems worth it#and its hard to really feel anything anymore or to feel in the moment but idk i was just going down that hill seeing everything and it was#very majestic so yeah that song is definitely gonna have the same effect as pin eye for me#which i must mention pin eye again its still OOOOGHH very good it came at a pretty good time for me#yeah basically this album is uhhhh whats keeping me somewhat grounded rn i recommend 👍
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A spoiler-free depiction of the Honkai Star Rail 2.1 story
#honkai star rail#LISTEN IDK HOW TO DRAW GALLAGHER OKAY#it took me fucking forever to do aventurine#im not gonna take that long with gallagher#hsr aventurine#hsr gallagher#anyways how are yalls doing after the 2.1 quest#me?#im shaking hoyo by the shoulders and begging to know what the fuck is going on for once in my life#theyre not following the tropes and i am So Upset
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Spinaraki week day 2: Monster
I've been reading too many manhwas because I immediately went fantasy au where Shigaraki is the hot Duke/lord/noble with the reputation of being cold, stern, and ruthless on the battlefield and Spinner is (????) the love interest that falls for him (housewife spinner and pink haired love interest allegations will never be beat I'm sorry)
(but Shigaraki fits the ruthless leader who actually cares for the people he's in charge of trope so well afdjfkglns)
#spinaraki#spinarakiweek#spinarakiweek2024#spinarakiweek4#shuichi iguchi#mha spinner#shigaraki tomura#mha jbee#listen - i just barely held myself back from putting Spinner is a fancy dress. yes he's a guy here but afshfkfl put that man in a dress#idk maybe Spinner's a field reporter or something? idk why he's on the battlefield#cw blood#cw death#cw beheading#i tried to make the gore-y aspects as.... vague as possible but just in case....#con is over. my crunch is over. I'm freeeee to work on spinaraki stuff despite being a week behind!#thought i'd be done in time for last week but i wasnt. so a week late it is. also highly likely I do the entire week's prompts in cosplay 🙈#yea... what a monster the duke is (heart eyes)#anyway!!!! im also gonna play some games tonight!!!! i havent been able to do that for months!!!! aaaaaah!!!!!
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as a young trans guy who isn't on any kind of hormones or anything like that, I can't wait for the day I can finally start.
I can't wait for my body to change and slowly become what I want it to be.
I wanna be able to wear feminine clothing without crying.
I wanna have stubble.
I want people to look at me and see me as a boy.
I want to look at myself and truly believe I'm a boy.
I wanna be able to look in my reflection and know that the person I'm looking at is Tommy. This is who I am and who I've always wanted to be.
it's not that I'm upset with how I look now, though, don't take it that way.
I do look pretty masculine.
I still wear crop tops and things more traditionally feminine.
but when I think of myself, Tommy, this isn't who I think of.
I think of whatever I will see when I look in the mirror someday in the future.
sometimes dysphoria can make me so upset, I'll get close to crying, I'll hate the way my body is.
but to get to where you wanna be, you've gotta go through the roads, right?
there's shortcuts that make things seem quicker, but you'll end up getting stopped by a red light later on.
and if you hate the ride there, you won't enjoy getting there in the end. you'll be exhausted and you'll just want to leave again.
but if you enjoy the ride, no matter how long or difficult it is, you'll be happy and ready to enjoy your time there as well.
that's what really keeps me going most of the time.
I can't wait to meet the Tommy I want to be, one day when looking in the mirror.
sorry for the long post, this was written at 3 am.
it probably should have just gone in the notes app but isn't that the same as Tumblr? ......no? shut up.
#im gonna regret this in the morning#im not a pussy tho so i wont delete it#‼️#this is what getting your period on a Tuesday night does to a guy#oh and listening to cavetown adds to the cause#and awaiting your binder you ordered to arrive#yeah lots of things#my posts never get popular so im expecting like 5 notes on this so if you read this all the way through i hope you enjoyed#idk what im talking abt here really im so bad with words i just needed to ramble#trans#transgender#trans boy#trans guy#lgbtq#lgbtq community#he/him#it/its#lgbtq+#transmasc#trans girl#trans woman
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