#so i’m for sure not taking one now
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our college asked us to send in pictures of ourselves for graduation and, me being me, i have exactly zero pictures where you can see my face
someone end me now
#┊glimpse into the crystal ball ೃ༄#you have to understand i’ve been running from cameras ever since i had the ability to#then again i still look the same way i did when i was 12 so i can go back a few years and nobody will notice#it’s worse since i have to send it to a classmate and not the college directly#and my class is such a gossip circle i really don’t want to#i’d rather die thanks#also since i’m super stressed atm my face looks like you could have filmed the moon landing on it#so i’m for sure not taking one now#some people just take pictures of themselves? wild concept#‘can i send in a picrew?’
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the fact that kevin day also witnessed a man being chopped up in the tower at evermore after neil’s audition is mad, and it’s something that is very much not addressed ever. like, maybe part of kevin was so accepting of how things were in the nest because he knew that this is the second branch, and if he were to leave, he’d become the main branch’s problem because he knows too much, and the main branch casually chops men up as a warning to literal children. and then he’s still called a coward for leaving ?? but also a coward for wanting to go back to make the inevitable less painful for him ??? and that’s not even considering what riko and tetusji did to him specifically, before even jean arrived at the nest. and his mother’s death would’ve been quite recent at that point. just insane.
#like i’m pretty sure the man being chopped up was the final straw for mary to take neil and run#and kevin saw that and wasn’t allowed to leave#so he accepted that maybe where he is is the better of two options and decided it’s okay because at least he gets to play exy#so exy became his only escape because if he was so scared that if he were to leave the nest he’d be the next one given to the butcher#it’s not until he doesn’t have exy anymore cause riko took it from him that he leaves#god i have so many thoughts but i am going to stop now#aftg#all for the game#kevin day#neil josten#so you’ll believe that neil was scared of nathan for a good reason but won’t believe kevin was scared of riko for good reason#(i said i’d stop but i did not)#and tetsuji#like even in tsc kevin is still calling tetsuji the master without hesitation
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Love when people play with the idea that one of Leo’s katana could have accidentally been left in the Prison Dimension and furthermore I love when that idea has Consequences™️.
Oh a chunk of your soul is in a place nothing can escape unless by means of ripping a hole through dimensions? Good luck with that.
Imagine Leo doesn’t realize it at first, and just assumes that this off, empty feeling is just “depression kicking it up a notch haha.” Later, he thinks it’s “probably just the ✨trauma✨, that’s what Mikey’s pamphlet said, I guess.”
And then, his body heals, and the brothers go out on the first mission they’d had in a while.
Leo goes to teleport and-
He’d never known what the in-between state of teleportation felt like until then. Seeing the world in a state of everything and nothing, simultaneously. To witness reality as a mass of molecules, just an infinite well of things put together to make a whole, and he, too, is broken into pieces yet he feels it all. He doesn’t know what’s happening, and it doesn’t really hurt but it’s-
In a blink, he’s at his katana, his teleport successful.
He’d been in the inbetween for ten minutes.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#listen I love the prison dimension I love Leo’s teleportation and portal abilities and I love when two cool concepts overlap soooo#idk it’s late and I wanted to ramble#Basically take Leo’s abilities but add a bit of ~delay~ to them#I know now that both swords fall out the portal I’m p sure but CONSIDER#could have so easily had one not go through the portal on time or just barely miss out on falling though
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@nowfallc PICTURE!! FOR YOU!! PLEASE TAKE IT!! <3
#agh I’m so so nervous but I’m big and strong and you all agree with me <3#plus it’s nearly 6 in the morning and I pulled an all nighter to finish this. which I’m sure is not helping my stress levels At All!#ALSO!#I’m gonna do another one!#you will NEVER know which picture so get fuckin ready HELLLLLLLLL yeah!!!#<- as for those of you who were Present when I said which picture I was gonna do. ummmmm. shut up! say nothing!!#ALSO…..2!!#wanted to share how I did the scuff marks cuz I felt like it. and also I said I was gonna do it. anyway!#what you wanna do is get a real textured brush. ideally something pencil adjacent#and a mid grey color#and with LIGHT pressure you follow the edges of whatever metal bit you’re rendering#you can go a little heavier on the corners if you desire#from the corners you take a smudge tool and gently blend in the opposite direction of the corner if that makes sense#and then take an eraser (IDEALLY one that’s the same as your rendering brush)#and gently erase back towards the corner. but with a much smaller brush size#add little scratches and pick marks as you please#and that’s it#you know maybe this would make more sense with an actual diagram I’m so so bad at explaining stuff agh#I’m gonna shut the hell up now 🙏#trigun#nicholas d. wolfwood#trigun stampede#trigun fanart
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i have this entire fleshed out shy reader lore for i guess a hypothetical universe where shy reader dated jj and/or pope first but eventually they broke up because of the whole season one treasure plotline not even because of a lack of love but mostly just her feeling neglected and alone. right at the end of all of that is when she would meet rafe just when he’s in that season two craziness/spiral and they become so insanely codependent and just around there somewhere when the pogues hate rafe even more they find out he’s dating shy reader and it’s just a whole other layer. so basically obx writers let me into the room.
#there’s so much more though I’m sure no one cares#this is my favorite shy reader plotline that I’ve never elaborated on#there’s so much angst and sadness about shy reader breaking up with pope or jj (I can’t decide which one)#because shy reader always loves with her whole heart and she thinks especially with pope/jj that it’ll last forever#sensitive/broken shy reader meeting spiraling/crazy rafe like it’s a match made in heaven#she takes his possessiveness and toxicity as a sign of love and attention after being neglected (sorry pope/jj..)#he thrives off of being able to fully control someone and actually have power in something for once#OH and then when pope and jj find out it’s just mayhem like so much angst#and in my 🩷💞💕perfect world of Shea🩷💞💕 rafe is locking this girl in#shy reader is carrying around the dead Cameron moms engagement ring like before the third season#ok I’ll shut up now
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I’m happy for the little life I built for myself
#there’s a lot of ways to go#i am nowhere NEAR the dream life I really want to attain#or the dream person I want to be#but high school me#hell even freshman in college me#would GAWK at the life I have so deliberately made happen.#the solid network of friends I have#the confidence I’m slowly but surely growing into#the discipline I’m harvesting bit by bit. i do not claim perfection but I am 100% improving#I’m just happy idk! i don’t compare myself at all now bc I know I’m on the right track#especially compared to where I was like 5 years ago. such a different mind state from now#and no one can take that away from me#there’s a lot more to go. a lot more. but I thought I’d pause and be intentionally grateful for what has been accomplished#bc it actually puts things into perspective to look at the past rather than just look to the present. it creates contentment#i get so caught up being hard on myself for not accomplishing certain things yet#that I forget I pulled myself out of such a deep rut by the skin of my teeth#and that’s important to keep in mind even as you progress to your goals#anyway <333 happy content in my own lane etc etc#p
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Downloading cc and all I have to say is… why on earth am I having to click through three or four different sites to get to the download are you getting paid for every link clicked????
#like why are you taking me from tumblr to patreon to curseforge omg#why would you do that???#or I get to patreon and now I’m going to another patreon post to go to curseforge or simfileshare#and whyyyyyyy are you using like 100 different sites to upload cc surely we could just settle on one or two what is going aawwwwnnnn#and whyyyyy are people using curseforge instead of patreon now I’m so confused what happened#downloading cc is just one of the most tedious things ever
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It’s disability pride month, and if you are disabled in the U.S. from Long Covid I want you to know that you’re not alone, and you’re valid in whatever you feel. Whether that’s sorrow at your new problems or rage at society for failing you, you are valid, and it is truly messed up that society is continuing to fail you.
#disability#trauma#chronic illness#long COVID#COVID#Tbh I’m not sure if I have long covid or not but I keep swinging between despair and fury#The brain fog SUCKS#I might have always had it but it feels especially bad now?#And I have all kinds of respiratory problems that got exacerbated#And possibly chronic fatigue but it’s unclear#And I’m one of the lucky ones!!!#I can still exercise without needing three days of bed rest after!#I was so RELIEVED when it turned out I could do that#I did like. Three weeks of breathing rehab to make sure#Not sure if it helped but now I’m not getting post-exertional backlash nearly as much anymore#And I didn’t lose my sense of smell or get my taste messed up#And I don’t need a respirator just an inhaler and some allergy meds and to take frequent breaks#And like. I know so many people have it worse#And that suuuuucks#But EVEN THIS makes me want to scream and rail half the time#Update as of Sept 2024 — this is no longer true#Got Covid again and now I can’t exercise without being too tired to move for three days#🙃#Probably will die mad about this actually#I had SUCH a good time working out one night#But then the next morning#Nope#head-to-toe muscle pain#couldn’t do any chores#Couldn’t even feed myself
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I think it matters a lot that a) everyone who has seeming offered to help Karna has done so *after* she needed it. And b) was in some way using her and therefore needed her.
In the eyes of a child, if you weren’t there when she needed you, and can’t even help yourself, what good are you to her?
#seph watches the ravening war#the ravening war#d20 the ravening war#karna solara#dimension 20#dimension 20 spoilers#the ravening war spoilers#I just have so many Karna feelings right now#I’m sorry I don’t mean to just ramble endlessly#I’m not just trying to get attention but I do giggle like a small bashful child if I do catch the eye aabria#I was not anticipating the first time and I’m not sure if I’m supposed to acknowledge it or not? hello if you read this I’m flattered#mostly I’m just going giddy over an angry literally rotting and starving warlock assassin#the idea of rotting befor she ripened is turning me literally feral#‘be careful with that one love [she] will do what it takes to survive’#is a lyric that ends up describing some of my all time favourite characters#though not actually the guy it’s about… Oop.#scavengers and survivors and damaged children with hungry eyes who learn how to be whoever you need#just to stay alive one more day to make it long enough#to outrun you so they can outrun the bear#the kid who learned that you can’t count on anyone so be everyone
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sunday is a deeply funny character to me because prior to knowing his character i was like yeah i enjoy his unintentional but also completely intentional cruelty and his manipulativeness and nowadays it’s just like… if i wanted to talk to a delusional evangelical protestant who believes their worldview is right for everyone i could just talk to my mother. sunday ain’t special
#thoughts#hsr#what do u mean u think ur worldview is the right one to save everyone & ur willing to force everyone to conform.#anyways. sunday’s concept of ‘ena’s dream’ goes directly against ena’s entire shtick as an aeon. i don’t care if it’s bc of childhood trauma#or grooming by gopher or whatever. his actions r still his actions. amazing how that works.#tbh the ena’s dream thing is just. so entirely annoying. yes he thought he was bringing ena back.#yes that is also antithetical to ena’s entire concept of cyclical natures and the rise and fall of things. what is sunday on.#like. now i can’t stand him. & tbh his fans bending over backwards to justify and excuse his actions r just. absolutely wild#anyways. only sundays i can stand r ones in aus where someone makes him get his shit together#normally dont like to post negative stuff but like. damn#like. not to be a hater on main. i’m sure ppl r legitimately talking abt him & taking it seriously#& i’m just not willing to go into his tags. oh my god tho. the poor little meow meow effect
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everyone seems so sure that nell is a recast of holly but i truly don’t see it tbh…. she’s not giving holly wheeler vibes To Me. seems funny (weird) to recast her Now (as if the other child actors haven’t also grown far past their canon ages) and then Also style her so distinctly different than we’ve seen holly before. the high pigtails to low ones, the muted/pastel colors to bright ones… if it really were holly, wouldn’t they want to definitively convey that by styling her in a way that balanced how different she would already look being played by a different actor? idk man!!! maybe i’m very wrong!!! but. i just don’t buy it
#especially with ‘henry’ there. like! who are you people!#also like………. hwhy#why is that the theory where did that come from. why does everyone just assume that#i’m not saying there’s not a reason i just have not seen a good one#right now it seems like people are just. making assumptions. speculating and then taking things for granted#(all this to say though. at the same time. the Resemblance to holly is eerie. like the differences seem deliberate. which brings me straight#to alice. and jane even. what’s going on??? there is so much we don’t understand yet. but people just seem so sure!!! it baffles me)#anywayyyyyyyyyyy#beets posts
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LiminalSpaces— Chapter 3
Hades (Video Game) | Modern AU (College/University) | PZA | Explicit | Chapters: 3/7 | Words: 21,238 (Chapter 3: 6,763)
Summary: Inspired by The Dreamers, except make it 2010s and vaporwave. Zagreus is a university student who feels aimless in life. His girlfriend dumped him, things between him & his best friend are weird, and he lacks ambition in his studies, all while the optimistic visions of his generation’s future are becoming lost. Until one day, he falls into the orbit of Achilles & Patroclus―a charming, yet eccentric pair who completely alter Zagreus’ outlook on life & death, love & loss, past & future, and the transitions in between. (Chapter 3 summary: Zagreus reaches a stalemate in his relationship with Thanatos. Achilles & Patroclus invite Zagreus back to their place again for what ends up being a highly-charged evening of music, games, drinking, and sex.)
Excerpt:
“Ugh, Pat. Why don’t you go get a glass?”
Achilles scowls as he watches Patroclus take a particularly clumsy swig directly from the wine bottle, accidentally allowing some to escape from the corners of his mouth and run in blood-like rivulets down his chin and neck. Achilles, to his discredit, hasn’t been behaving much better. His own glass has gone untouched for a while now, and he opts instead to pass the bottle back and forth between himself and Patroclus.
“I will get one whenever I next have an excuse to end up in the kitchen,” Patroclus says as he hands the bottle back to Achilles. “Consider every sip of wine a kiss from me.”
“Why consider it, when I can just do this?”
Achilles pours some wine into his mouth, holding it there while he leans over to Patroclus and feeds it to him. Wine dribbles out between their mouths as the transfer devolves into a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss. They struggle to stifle their giggles over the mess they’re making, while reveling in the delectations of the kiss.
If they were anyone else, Zagreus might have felt irritated to be made a captive audience to their impudent displays of affection. But as it is, he has difficulty ever seeing their behavior as anything but endearing. And to be fair, he thinks to himself, as he tips back his wine glass for small sip: they are probably really, really drunk.
“We should let Zagreus have a turn at the game,” Patroclus says as soon as he regains his composure.
Zagreus, whose mouth is still full, tries not to splutter as he swallows down his drink all at once. He titters incredulously.
“What, me? I don’t even know anything about the kind of music you like.”
“Don’t you worry about that,” Patroclus says kindly. “I’ll help you with it.”
“Patroclus, no, don’t you dare—” Achilles starts, his voice sharp with warning.
“It’s all right, Achilles! Don’t you want to make our guest to feel clever? And who knows, maybe you’ll know the answer.” Patroclus grins impishly as he bounds over to Zagreus’ side, taking the wine bottle with him.
“And what if he doesn’t?” Zagreus asks Patroclus.
“And if he doesn’t—” Patroclus repeats; he leans in slowly, his mouth now so close to his ear that Zagreus can hear the gentle intake of breath in his preparation to speak. Zagreus feels the coarseness of his beard, the nearness of his warmth, making his skin prickle; he can catch a whiff of the alcohol, along with the earthy, yet floral sweet smell of his dark brown skin. “—He’ll have to do whatever you say.”
READ THE REST ON AO3 HERE!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/57964459/chapters/148565071
Chapter Navigation: 1 | 2 | 3
#pza#patrochilles#zagchilles#patzag#thanzag#megzag#my fics#liminal spaces (pza dreamers au)#this is the one I was most excited for and now the fun REALLY starts#I’m pretty sure parts of this chapter were the very first prose I wrote for this fic#the whole unhinged scene you wanted to write so you build an entire story around it#btw this was supposed to be the end of part 1 when I originally envisioned post this fic as 2 chapters#yes I was gonna drop an entire 21k chapter lol aren’t you glad I didn’t?#I’m planning on posting chapter 4 to get us properly past the halfway point and then I’ll take an intermission so I can get WTDF ch8 posted#once again sorry to the WTDF enjoyers!#I’m definitely itching to dive back into it which was the goal here#anyways we’re gonna be in the metaphorical liminal space from here on out!#hades fanfic
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Heyyy….so I’m back to posting arts momentarily I guess (not like I went anywhere though. Still spending my life staring at a iPad screen for nine hours straight….hate this routine I loosely call “living” so much hahahahaha chronically online potato sack. Not doing so hot I can’t even anymore!)
Anyways uh-so I have a lot of scraped things because I’m loosing energy to do creative works I can’t keep pushing myself. Kinda accepted that I’ve weighed myself down exhausted myself with all this pressure and I need to let go. But it’s hard and honestly the last thing I want is fatigue again. But guess it’s a cycle for a reason huh. Can’t fight it off, just stuck powerless and letting it happen begrudgingly
So I made this unfinished gif (you can tell because the hand is missing and the background looks unidentifiable. Plus cigarette smoke just gave up on existing wow so relatable). Honestly I kinda set myself up to get stuck on the process of this anyways since I don’t like animating on Procreate. The layering frames system is a pain to navigate. Only reason I wanted to animate Mr. Puzzles using Procreate is for some level of gained “experience” and added brush diversity for the glitch effect. But guess it wasn’t enough to keep my attention. Started it on August 5th, probably abandoned it two days later or so. I don’t know it feels like a long long time ago by now but that’s just because I’ve been overwhelmed mentally and can’t keep track of days passing bye
And this is the simplified version (aka what I started with originally as a drawn base messy sketchy illustration)
#cw smoking#tw smoking#mr. puzzles fanart#mr. puzzles smg4 animation#mr. puzzles animation#puzzlevision animation#hahah can you tell I’m not feeling all that good about the state of my art and would prefer to avoid drawing attention to it!#yeah yeah you probably can I’m not even bothering to conceal how unstable I feel right now :)#one moment I’m chatting to myself enthusiastically about my interests and then next moment I feel like I’m incompetent and not good enough#just comparing myself to other animators who seem to have no difficulty finishing projects#why the hell can’t I do that? why do I get stuck and take so long#maybe I’m not cut out for it like I thought I was….#maybe I need to switch careers to voice acting instead or something#because as it is I’m getting sick of spending my days in my room animating away without anything to show for my work and time#ahahahaha wow being a creative sure is a double edge sword huh?? :))#damn wonder if Mr. Puzzles is gonna turn into a vent character for me oh boy can’t wait to see I wonder huh#venting in tags#update#hplonesome art
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I mean yes, definitely, but I also just really like projecting lmfao
#Those characters I like?#Yeah they’re me now sorry#I based their characterization on parts of my own personality#And how I reacted to being in similar situations or how I think I would react if I was in the same situation as them#Is it a character study of my personal representation of these characters#Or am I actually secretly character studying myself#Is this therapy?#This counts as therapy right#I’m not allowed to got to therapy lol#So I will instead project on my sillies and secretly vent about my own experiences through the voices I give the sillies#That’s healthy right I’m like 99% sure that’s a healthy coping mechanism#Who needs therapy (me) when you can hyperfixate on a character who has gone through far worse but similar things to you#And then let them heal and be cared for#Except you’re actively projecting on them so it’s basically you who’s healing#See. See what I did there#I’m so smart#Im gonna therapy myself one way or another#Wether I’m allowed to go to therapy or not PARENTS#Yeah. Take that. Teenage rebellion moment#I’m therapy-ing myself#🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯
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(Also thank you for the support, I love all of you kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss) - Rip xxxxx
#rippersz#fanfictionwriter#cuz it may take a while if ppl say yes#I’m doing finals right now so you’ll have to wait 😭#but I can do it!!!!#it would probably be a series of one shots for different characters maybe#or mass headcanons? not sure yet#lemme know#ripleytalks#:3 thank you for the followers btw
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Arcane x Game of Thrones crossover where Viktor is isekaied into Viserys, brother of Daenerys, Mother of Dragons, body
He wakes up on a house in Bravos with these memories that make zero sense to him but the euphoria of functioning lungs are distracting him from analyzing it to much
There is an old man there. He calls him prince. The old man is dying and the servants have a greed in their eyes that Viktor knows well, he was seen it enough on the streets of Zaun
A hunger for more after years of scraps while in the shadows of prosperity
He could fight them, poison them even. The trouble such actions may bring to him would be worth for his sole survival in the long run. But he is not alone in here.
There is a girl. Not older than a toddler.
Dany. His new sister.
The choice is easy really. So there he goes, a staff made from one of the thicker branches of the lemon tree in the front yard (he misses his cane turned staff. Even with both legs functioning, he missed the weight in his hand. And, as the undercity had shown him, having something that you could use as a range weapon was always a good thing) in the dead of the night to steal as much food and coin he can carry with him
He takes one of the fabrics with him so he can wrap it around the tiny girl that is now his responsibility. He wraps her to his back, her tiny body flush against him. Alive, close, protected.
She nuzzles closer to his neck, her tiny hands on his shoulders.
He knows her for only a day and he would destroy the world for her
When he goes back to his world (because he would find a way back) he would be taking her with him
A staff, a purse of coins, a bag with food and a toddler on his back
That’s how the first assassin sent by King Robert finds them
That’s the last thing said assassin sees before the young prince stabs him, hits him in the head with the staff and drops him in the river
Viktor grew up in Zaun. An assassin had to do way better than that if they wanted to off him. Especially because he was fighting for someone besides himself
For himself ? He would survive.
For Dany? He would thrive!
#game of thrones#arcane#viktor arcane#daenerys targaryen#viserys iii targaryen#Viserys brother of Daenerys#in this reality they just straight up steal the eggs from Ilirio#are you really going to look me in the eye and tell me that Viktor would sell his 13 year old sister for an army???#for a throne that he doesn’t give a shit about???#the streets of Essos know the him as the Ruthless Prince#he will bite you#Vikserys to Robert: you think you funny? I’m about to be hilarious *invents gun powder and fire arms*#No one knows what the fuck guns are so they all think that Prince Viserys can kill a man by pointing his fingers at a man and he will die#Dany: brother I want to change the world for the better as queen#Vikserys: sick take this *hands her a gun*#Robert is shitting himself back in Westeros because a prince that kills all his assassins in increasingly looney tunes ways#is a demon he was not ready for#NOW there surely is more loyalist because they could get behind such resourceful ruler#especially after he made a fortune with his inventions for the betterment of the life in Essos#too bad he doesn’t want no crown#Dany is the one he is backing for the throne. Him? if he doesn’t find a way back he will find a little run the castle and live there#inventing#dating hot smiths that don’t remind him of Jayce AT ALL WHO SAID THAT#they find an egg that clearly a dragon egg but is definitely smaller than Dany’s#this is how Rio can still live#so dany has three full dragons and Vik has one purple axolotle that he loves very much and takes naps on#Dany loves her weird hermit feral gay brother#she will cut a bitch that disrespects him#She calls him V
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