#so i apologize for not being very active | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

candyheartedchy · 2 months ago

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Hoping I’m not dealing with burnout again…

#kinda struggling rn not gonna lie #like before I been kinda having a hard time drawing any self ship stuff #so I ended up working on my original stuff for a bit #but now I kinda feel a little numb??#and I haven’t been very active or checking/responding to my notifications late #it could just be my depression acting up again #which would suck since I been doing better #but I’m also struggling to enjoy things rn #so i apologize for not being very active #💬 chy chatter 💬#ventish #vent #i guess just in case

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qiu-yan · 1 month ago

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gonna be real here boss when it comes to the ancestral hall scene i am 100% on jiang cheng's side

#mdzs #jiang cheng #jc apologism #yanyan speaks #king that is his house. you are in his house. you left and you did not come back so that is not your house anymore.#you don't get to walk around like you own the place because you actively chose to give that up #also king you hit first....jc was being an ass but you were the one who escalated a verbal confrontation into a physical one #also these are all thoughts i had on my very first readthrough before i became a jc stan #i only became a jc stan at the guanyin temple scene #mo dao zu shi

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wayfinderships · 2 months ago

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Hmmmm....Romance Repulsed 👍

#Sorry for not being very active lately-agksnfkdn #I think Romance Repulsed is the best way to describe how I've been feeling lately #It's not permanent or anything- My stance on romance fluctuates often but it's usually in the more favorable category #or indifferent #But since yesterday its been more on the repulsed category- Just thinking about it or engaging with it too much has made me uncomfortable #So my apologies for not posting or engaging much ^^#pan rambles

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bathtub---mermaid · 12 days ago

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hai jiraiblr !! a bit of an urgent question [ hence the lack of pretty text ] , but how exactly do you hide cat scratches properly ?

i have some on my hand from when i was feeling episodic in class , and turns out i have a psychiatrist appointment on tuesday .?! i'd really appreciate if someone could help . . .

for reference , they're quite textured and somewhat healed [ i say somewhat since they're about two days old now , but most cat scratchesend up taking a week or so to heal ]

pretty please help !! your ace detective does not want to be hospitalised during the holidays again . . . !!

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altruistic-meme · 18 days ago

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sigh.

#i hate. being at all rational ornpolite sometimes.#cus like #my sister that i hate called to apologize. about things i frankly don't even care about at this point.#and i let her bc while i don't particularly want her to be actively in my life or see or at all very often #i can acknowledge that it is good that she is TRYING to figure her shit out even a little #and while it is FAR from what she SHOULD be apologizing to me about #at least its. a step?#maybe one that will lead to her either figuring it or building up to the actual problem #so i accepted that apology and moved on #but i told my other sister about it and she's just.#'i would've hung up immediately. i would've cussed her out'#ok. 1. thats your own decision but not how i handled it. though ik shell be annoyed if i say anything to imply that #that is a terrible way to respond. and like shes entitled to her anger in not saying she doesnt have a good reason for it #but damn dude. chill.#and 2. what would that even accomplish. like. what would that do.#it would demotivate her to work on her shit and like i get that sister 2 doesnt ever want to see sister 1 again #(again. she has valid reason and im not blaming her for that)#but like. that would only grow the circle of violence. it would end up with more people being hurt than have already been.#and frankly its fucking immature as shit lmao #sorry.#i have to actually go reasons to sister 2 now im just #sometimes i get annoyed when i remember my mom telling me that she genuinely forgets im the youngest #bc it means that she has always treated me like i was older than i was and put more on me than anyone else #but then i have situations like this.#and i go yeah. YEAH. i can see how i am more mature than my siblibgs to the point that the woman who GAVE BIRTH TO US #will sometimes FORGET THE ORDER OF THAT #shh ac

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magnusmodig · 1 month ago

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ovo whispers menacingly abt his grandstanding .

#(you can grandstand and be impulsive and prone to violence and have a terrible temper without being arrogant thanks)#(the closest he ever gets to saying he's above anyone else is w/ the jotuns if you really squint at it and he only ever said-)#(- that he wanted to use /force/ aka /violence/ to get them to submit to his rule bc otherwise he views them as DANGEROUS)#(based not only on historical /fact/ but cultural differences boogeymanning and seeing firsthand how they-)#(-MURDERED SOME OF HIS PEOPLE???? AND BROKE INTO HIS HOME???? ON CORONATION DAY????)#(he doesn't act like heimdall or the warriors or sif or even loki is below him. he wouldn't /ask them/ for permission otherwise)#(he even asks the humans-he-just-met for permission a la jane and then respects their decisions and apologizes for being rude abt the mug)#(and the one time he says 'know your place' to loki is when loki is actively bUTTING INTO A CONVERSATION that thor is being ridiculous abou #(bc to thor it's about /winning/ the argument with laufey and he's totally losing track of his goal to try and figure out wtf the jotuns)#(were doing ///in asgard inside the palace IN THE VAULT on CORONATION DAY///.)#(arrogance is specifically thinking you are inherently better than anyone else bc you exist)#(thor very clearly demonstrates selfish desires that translate to poorly thought out deeds)#(eg: taking it directly to laufey instead of trying to take a step back and figure it out in OTHER WAYS before a direct confrontation)#(and he also demonstrates overblown self-confidence.)#(eg the “i have no plans to die today” / “none do.”)#(that's being overconfident in his own abilities that's still not arrogance.)#( ooc . ) — stories that leap from the page .#( salt to taste . ) — in this house we love the actual main character . crazy i know .#tbd #(thor expresses boastfulness and pride similarly to his whole culture of over-exaggerating ur war stories)#(his vice is letting that vanity get to his head and fueling increasingly impulsive and stubborn decisions)#(out of the sheer and desperate desire to prove he's good enough to take up such a heavy mantle as the crown of asgard + nine realms)#(but he doesn't just look at other people and go 'oh yeah i'm so totally better than you just because i exist')#(he's also not a lightning mcqueen who actually DOES see himself above the rustees cars and the route 66 cars)#(goes out of his way to make that abundantly clear and wants actually nothing to do with any of them in pursuit of his own gains)#(only to finally figure out he's not all hot shit and slows tf down to understand and enjoy life as part of society not above it)#(he literally flies of the handle because he fully believes the jotunar actually plotted an entire elaborate scheme)#(SPECIFICALLY in the effort to exploit him as the green thumb weak link as Newly Instated King who Doesn't Know What He's Doing)#(And therefore will OBVIOUSLY do a terrible job because he's not odin and can never be odin but he /needs/ to be like odin bc odin is stron #(HE doesn't know it was loki's plan. he doesn't know it was /loki/ who timed it to the coronation.)

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empirelead · 8 months ago

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"It seems this place has become ... crowded again."

#[ roleplay :: in character ]#[ roleplay :: dashboard commentary ]#// HELLO HELLO EVERYONE #// SO NICE TO SEE THE FANDOM BEING ACTIVE AGAIN #// APOLOGIES FOR THE LACK OF ACTIVITY #// i am still in my bg3 era #// but i still love kuvira very much~

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sselroloc · 9 months ago

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i'll be your valentine's if you'll... 💘

#happy valentine's day #i tried my best #but i have had a very struggling disappointed and self-depricated 3 weeks or so now #that being said #i kept my word and it is what is #you're looking at someone who just recently started getting active again and is slowly motivating themselves to be productive #please don't be mean and body shame #it wouldn't let me add the gifs naturally because apparently the mb was bigger than 10mb so oof #this was the best i could do #i was like 70% hard. i couldn't get myself super hard my apologies. i really really made an effort to do so but alas #anyways #i feel like shit but whatever life goes on and this feeling won't last forever. getting back on track 👍🏽#i am going to be a-fucking-okay 👊🏽#😊😊😊#a rose colored tease #personal #🥀🖤#stay sexy y'all

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taiyami · 1 year ago

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Bought myself two new anime figures .. life is looking up.

#tai talks #had to cancel my chest tattoo appointment due to unforseen circumstances 💔 very bummed about it #i apologize for not being very active. have a lot going on atm!!#but im still around so thanks for sticking around my friends

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synthshenanigans · 7 months ago

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there’s one on here currently and they’re bringing back up old controversy (jashshipping)

Yeaa I saw that. They also seem to post a bunch of CJ related things, so I might make the daily photos one since there isn't one for just CJ screenshots/photos

#im gonna be a fait bit busy today so I cant make it rn #also wont be making it tomorrow as there's another strike happening then [ill make a post on that later too btw]#but i want there to be an account just of stuff from the vids or of the ones he posts on twitter #as for the shipping thing #i wish ppl wouldn't be so rude with things sometimes man #my stance is basically the same as CJs. interpret it however you'd like just don't show it to ppl who are uncomfortable with it #also don't harass or be a dick to people who do or don't ship it #im glad it died down since then at least & that there's not a bunch of hate going around #this fandom is simultaneously really nice to be in & also really draining sometimes #tho it definitely isn't the worse. ive been in a lot of ones that are a LOT worse than here. big & small #place is actually quite nice mostly. despite some things that deserve needing to be called out [like some of the ableism toward Heart]#I think things would be a lot better if people just let others do their own thing. as long as its not like. fuckin illegal or offense #or against CJs boundaries. just let others vibe out in there own corner #ain't that what we all said when TH purists complain about CJs covers? No ones forcing you to consume the content. is all good #just stay where you're comfortable! if anyone's forcing you to look at their stuff then they're the issue. and that goes both ways #again just listen to what the guy said. don't show it to people that don't like it. don't harass people who do it don't like it. an like #just be groovy #sorry for the rant this has just been on my mind for months now #im generally very neutral on things but i hate everyone just yellin at each other when there doesn't need to be yelling in the first place #again this place is hell of a lot better than other spaces ive been in #its a main reason this is the first fandom I've actively participated a shit ton in #im actually using discord & talking [a bit] to other ppl for once lol #idk man i like it here. Just don't make a reason for people not to like it here #again apologies for the rant op. this has just been on my mind for some time & i really don't want shit being blown up again #also apologize if anythins spelled wrong or sounds like nonsense #shitty keyboard + dyslexia + not being able to edit tags can make dumb results lol #moss rants #[atlas asks]

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just-shapes-and-sweaters · 1 year ago

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Hello, this is Icyangel. You people may remember me as "Peppi". I am still Sparkys girlfriend, but to getting to the point, Me and Sparky have seen this post.

Sparky is needing a moment to decide, but I do have a lot of words. I will unblock you on discord and here. Message me if you need my discord.

rAiNb, feeL freE tO reSpOnD tOo, bUt sinCe I haVen'T maDe a reSpOnSe yeT, I'd liKe tO maKe a prOpeR apoLogY

I'm stiLL veRy sOrrY fOr hUrtiNg spArKy, aS tHeY weRe a geNuiNe frieNd aNd soMeoNe tHaT loOkeD uP tO mE, aNd I'vE beeN beAtiNg mYseLf uP fOr iT sinCe, I eVeN pUt oFF dOiNg tHe apoLogY beCauSe I feLt sO gUiLtY I feLL iNtO a hOrriD spiRaL abOuT iT, bUt I dOn'T wAnT tO rUn aWaY frOm iT aNymoRe. I'm sOrrY, aNd I meAn iT wHoLeheArtedLy

wAy baCk wHeN, I wAs giVeN "eVidenCe" "prOviNg" spArKy wAs iN tHe wrOnG bUt I reaLiZe nOw iT wAs mOsT liKeLy fAbriCateD, aNd wHiLe iT dOeSn'T eXcuSe wHaT hAppeNeD, I tHouGhT I wAs iN tHe riGhT, iN sHunniNg a peRsOn tHaT wAs buLLyiNg peOpLe, bUt I eNdeD uP beiNg tHe buLLy iN tHe eNd

I wAs a nAiVe aNd yOuNgeR veRsiOn oF mYseLf tHat hAd tOo muCh oF a senSe oF juStiCe, wAs eMotiOnaLLy streSseD leAdiNg tO iNstAbiLitY, aNd I huRt peOpLe oVeR iT

I've goNe tO tHeRapY oVeR iT aLL aNd haVe medS nOw aNd I'vE beeN muLLinG iT oVeR

I dOn'T neeD yOu, oR aNyoNe eLsE I'vE huRt tO fOrgiVe mE, I kNoW tHe tHiNgS I sAiD muSt haVe, aNd liKeLy stiLL dO, stiNg

bUt I juSt wAnT tO geNuiNeLy apoLogiZe beCauSe I neVeR meAnT tO huRt aN innOceNt bYstAndeR, a cLoSe frieNd, soMeoNe I appreCiAteD a loT, aNd iT suCkS

I cAn neVeR uNdO tHoSe yeArS aNd wHaT hAppeNeD, aNd sO I wAnT tO gO fOrwArD beiNg a betteR veRsiOn oF mYseLf, aNd eVeN iF I'm nOt fOrgiVeN (wHiCh I cOmpLeteLy uNdeRstAnD) I aM apoLogiZiNg iN tHe hOpE tHaT, iF notHiNg eLsE, it'LL giVe yOu, aNd eVeRyoNe affeCteD, a seNsE oF cLoSuRe

I dOn'T wAnT aNyoNe tO huRt aNymoRe beCauSe oF soMe dUmB tHiNgS I sAiD aS a teeNaGeR, sO leT mE kNoW iF I cAn dO aNytHiNg tO leSseN tHe huRt I'vE cAuSeD yOu, spArKy aNd iCy

- mOd veL

#rAiNb aLsO aLLudeD tO jSaS beiNg oVeR #it'S nOt #I'vE juSt beeN veRy buSy witH liFe stUff bUt haVe beeN wOrKiNg oN iT beHiNd tHe sCeNeS #bUt I wAnteD tO apoLogiZe eVeN tHouGh I'm nOt aS aCtiVe riGht nOw aS I uSeD tO bE beCauSe I tHiNk it'S reaLLy iMpOrtAnT #I aM sOrrY. deepLy. deepLy sOrrY fOr teAriNg dOwN spArKy liKe tHaT #I tHouGhT I wAs iN tHe riGhT fOr iT sinCe I hAd 'prOoF'#bUt I wAsn'T #aNd sO I wAnT tO maKe tHiNgS riGhT #rAmbLe oVeR #apology #not art #not an ask

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flippedorbit · 1 year ago

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do you want me to fucking go off on you? do you truly fucking want that mother?

#“oh you and your sister never listen to me and blah blah blah” we fucking do (or at the very least i do)#“you guys never help out” does me doing the litter and taking out the trash and on occasion hand washing the dishes mean #fucking nothing to you? does me sweeping the floor every once in a while because you chose to keep us in an area that is ALL SAND/DIRT ROAD #for whatever stupid ass reason also meaningless? does me doing my damn best to help out mean fucking nothing?#do you want me to kill my self. do you want to lose your eldest child to something YOU could have fucking prevented all because you can’t #stop being a bitch to him all the time? do you really fucking want that mom? because at this rate i am once again on the road to fucking #attempting it. i’m so god damn sick of how you treat me. the only time i can do anything i want is at night. i stay up super late playing #games with my friends because its the only time in the day when you aren’t bitching and whining for me to do something you don’t want to do #for the past several days i’ve been up until five in the damn morning just to do something that makes me happy.#you misgender me. you deadname me. you refuse to accept any aspect of my identity. you don’t treat me like a god damn person.#i have so many different ways i can consider attempting if i truly wanted to. the only thing keeping me alive is my friends. because they a #least show that they fucking care and actively want to do things with me. like group drawing or playing video games.#YOU on the other hand; mother; yell and get mad at me over the stupidest shit and never fucking apologize.#i cannot recall a singular time you’ve apologized for being a complete bitch to me over something so fucking unimportant.#and yet i’m expected to be completely fucking fine and happy all because you provide me with the bare fucking minimum.#”i clothe and feed and provide a place for you to live” THAT IS THE BARE FUCKING MINIMUM. sure you could argue over the fact i’m 18 and #should be out working somewhere. but you give me so few opportunities for going places and even considering getting a job or finally gettin #my driver’s license. plus i would rather fucking die than work any food service or customer service job. because i’d be going somewhere #where i’d mostly get talked down to or yelled and then come home and have the same shit done after working for hours and getting minimal #pay. i’d rather work on my own fucking terms with commissions than go into any job where i have to interact with others in public for any #reason. where i’d be treated just the same as at home. like someone who isn’t a person and doesn’t deserve anyone to be nice to them.#i constantly so desperately wish that maybe one day soon i’d find someone to be with romantically and that i could maybe live with them and #get out of this hell hole that i’m supposed to call home. to go somewhere and have my efforts appreciated. to go somewhere where i’d #actually fucking be loved. i shouldn’t have to wish so god damn hard for a better life all because my mother can’t fucking treat me like a #person with hopes and dreams and thoughts and feelings.#i’m ending this rant here before i get too angry and upset. see you all in maybe an hour.#suicide mention #ask to tag

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yeleltaan · 2 years ago

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//Hey everyone! Just wanted to let you know that I'll be going on a short hiatus (roughly a week) to sort out a variety of stuff and get some rest from the platform.

I've been feeling negative lately when it comes to writing, and also not all that comfortable on the blog. On top of that this Spring break isn't much of a break for me between assignments and other personal matters, so I really need to be in a more focused headspace and not let stress get to me.

I won't be around in the dash and I'll likely miss most of what goes on, though if you tag me in something or send me a link I'll be sure to take a look. I'll also still respond to IM's on Tumblr and Discord so by all means feel free to message me for anything, be it plotting or some other kind of chatting!

That is all, I'll see you soon. Take care!

#ooc #you likely won't see much of a difference in the dash since I haven't been very active #but I haven't really been 'away' from Tumblr just quiet #I've been inconsistently struggling with activity for over a year #as well as the accumulated effect of some stuff over many more years that's been weighing on me #(apologies if reads like vagueing or anything of the sort it's really not. It's just a lot to put into words and I don't want to vent)#so I'm trying a short but more 'thorough' break to see if that helps clear my head a bit and prevent this from going further #I'll admit I feel a bit uneasy about it... being away gives me FOMO feelings + I don't want to be rusty with writing #but I still want to give it a shot #see you when I'm back (unless we chat that is)#take care! May this week treat you well -u-#I hope this week treats you well! -u- And if it gets rough remember to be kind to yourself

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borom1r · 1 year ago

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I have thoughts abt Beanix but they are NOT coherent ooooargh!!!! HIM!!!!!!!

#yea a lot of them r very nicely summarized in ‘he is trying to teach Apollo a lesson’ and ‘if the whole world thinks he forged evidence #then why not ACTUALLY do it. the fuck is it gonna cost him?’#but like. mmmgh. mmmrmph!!!#grabbing him and shaking him by the shoulders so hard #bc Miles was under the SAME scrutiny and yea he never got disbarred over it but there were rumors and then active accusations and the very #real and serious threat OF being disbarred. it never came to pass but it WAS there #and like. it was phoenix’s arguable naïveté and his ‘blind’ faith in Miles which halted that shit in its tracks #if Phoenix had this same sort of ‘being naive will cost you everything’ attitude. almost pessimistic. at that time? things would’ve been #FUCKED. and like ‘but Phoenix always believes in Miles!!!’ Because He Trusts People Wholeheartedly At That Current Stage of His Life #and like two sides same coin or whatever but how much of him not DIRECTLY (visibly) going to Miles for help is like #class trial. everyone thinks he stole the money so he might as well have. and he goes to apologize. except Miles declares that it’s not #fair. there’s no proof so Phoenix shouldn’t have to apologize if he didn’t do it #but now. he did it. maybe not in THAT trial. but he gave forged evidence to Apollo. this time there’s proof. this time he did it.#for real. no takebacks. and this is the Prosecutor Edgeworth in endless pursuit of the dirty bitter truth. and it has to be a pretty heavy #weight to think of what this truth would mean to Miles in particular. considering their history (in Phoenix’s mind anyways)#I think miles would understand. not agree with it but understand. a forgivable transgression (just not forgivable to the part of Phoenix #that is still himself. that isn’t playing a game of deception and recognizes that his own genuine faith saved multiple lives.)#ARGH. There’s more. microwaving him like a fucking burrito there’s SO MUCH MORE!!!!

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multishipper-baby · 2 years ago

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Thinking about how the whole Deya situation resolved because having the family fight makes me big sad :c

#myocs #derek for his part just couldn't resist the parental bond- he's just too softhearted and family oriented for that #he saw the lil newborn looking all small and weird and couldn't help but want to protect her 🥺#he was scared out of his mind and didn't know if he'd be a good parent but he knew he'd forever regret it if he abandoned her #especially with her being weak and sickly and stuff #he'd always be mentally worrying about what happened to her. if she ever recovered. if her guardians where taking care of her needs #what if he left her with someone and they didn't properly deal with her medical issues? he'd never forgive himself #so. dad mode activate #gold on the other hand couldn't stay mad at red. especially when the situation wasn't fully his fault #did he make bad decisions? most definitely. but red is that sort of guy and gold loves him all messed up as he is #also; red was extremely distraught when he found out something was wrong with the baby #he wouldn't stop blaming himself and started being uncharacteristically melancholic #it was honestly pretty worrying because he'd never been the type to get sad before and now he was acting downright depressed #and there was no way gold could abandon his husband when things where that dire (or worse- give him additional stress)#so he was red's support person like he's always been. and red was able to properly apologize to him once the whole situation ended #I don't think their relationship ever went back to how it was before deya- but they still love each other very much #and red would do anything to make sure gold knows he's loved

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usarinnpa · 1 month ago

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whines and paws at you and paws at you and paws at you

#miss my friend. he's busy at the moment but i still miss him #i'm still half shifted (werewolf style; not system style) so it's. hfnrgnrghrhhhhfrnn #if you see this: YES this is about you astarion. tease me for this and i will... cry; i suppose.#made a wolvden account and it's sort of helping.#bays and whines and presses my muzzle into the crook of your arm so very stubbornly #grown half-elf. by the way.#though... i'm glad that the full moon has passed.#honest to selune i was actively trying to not shift in headspace. needless to say that it didn't go well; and that i had to be restrained.#with silver bands. which hurt a lot.#i was being very good; though. i hadn't mauled anyone :(#really quite unfair.#and i was keeping my ears pinned and my eyes slitted and my tail low. i was so good...#very mean.#in any case; i've been selune's specialist girl recently. i do hope no one turns into a big dumb wolf and licks everyone.#...and also bites and attempts to maul a few people.#i've been a really really good girl though :)#apologies for the strange manner of speech. as i've said; half shifted.

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