#so disingenuous

[bilboyagathechickenfootedhobbit]

And now the troll that originally started this nonsense is trying to disguise his public sex kink as “if you don’t educate kids about sex you are making them vulnerable to predators.”

For fucks fucking sake.

I refuse to engage directly with his posts because I’m 99% certain he has an abuse kink and I will not participate in it. But like….this is just so fucking dumb. So dumb.

OBVIOUSLY you need to educate kids about sex and consent. I do that every day in little ways with my kid, starting in infancy when we only ever used correct and accurate words for anatomy. This removes the shame around genitals and gives them the vocabulary to speak up if anything ever happens. Instead of “someone touched my no-no” they can clearly describe what happened: “an adult touched my penis.” No vagueness, no room for misunderstanding. He used to follow me into the bathroom and that naturally raised some questions, which I answered matter-of-factly and in an age-appropriate manner. “Mommy doesn’t have a penis because women have vulvas.” Boom, that’s it. There was no need to explain to him what the parts are for; he was three. But you lay the groundwork by talking about bodies and genitals without shame, so that when it does come time to start discussing sex (there is no such thing as one sex talk, it should be an ongoing and open conversation that addresses whatever issue is concerning the involved parties) you can do so without shame and embarrassment.

I model consent all day every day. Playing around and tickling and he tells me to stop? Immediate full stop. He’s feeling upset and says he’s going to his room to get his feelings under control? I don’t barge in demanding to talk. Likewise, when I tell him I need ten minutes alone, I expect that boundary to be honored, and it is. He knows that when someone says ‘no’ it means exactly that. When he and Daddy are wrestling and Daddy tells him he needs a break, he knows it means no surprise flying kicks. Because the adults around him model consent to teach him consent.

You do not need to expose children to adults having sex to teach them about sex and consent.

The idea that exposing children to adults having sex will somehow safeguard them against sexual abuse is the absolute pinnacle of stupidity.

The fact that this nitwit vehemently argued for people having the right to have sex where children could see it and is now pulling the “but this is to HELP the children!!” card is so predictable and unimaginative that I can’t even be mad, just TIRED. Sure, bud, make your post about how you’re just trying to safely educate kids about sex to protect them in order to make everyone else seem like rabid screaming lunatics who don’t actually care about kids safety. It’s so transparent I could make a greenhouse out of it. But I do truly worry about the younger kids (there I go again, looking out for the pesky youth) who are taking all this in and going “Yeah!! Show kids porn, it will HELP THEM!!”

There’s a big fucking difference between a kid growing up seeing casually naked family members about the home, being naked in the changing room at a gym/spa, or going to a public bathhouse with the family, and seeing strangers openly fucking in public, and you know this.

The whole public sex discourse is insane. But what goes beyond insane into heart-dropping, what the fuck where did we go wrong territory is this attitude of ‘who cares if kids see? They’ll be having sex one day eventually.’ Like???? Yeah, most likely they will. My six year old kid will one day drive an automobile. Does that mean I should just give him the keys this morning and let him drive himself to school? I mean, he’s going to drive EVENTUALLY, right? By that same token, I should also just give him a tumbler of whiskey and let him take a drag off a cigarette; I mean, he’ll probably try these things one day ANYWAY, may as well be today, right? And since he’s going to learn what sex is, why not invite one of his little friends over and show them how to fuck one another?

Oh wait, does that make you uncomfortable now? The idea of two six year olds being encouraged to have sexual intercourse? DOES THAT SEEM WEIRD??? Why?? I mean, they’re going to do it one day anyway, WHY NOT NOW??? Why NOT get your six year old wasted and zooted and teach them how to properly fuck?? Does that make you feel weird? What are you? Some lame-o virgin who doesn’t know how to party? Weak sauce. See, I happen to be a super cool edge-lord sex god who has had ALL THE SEX and therefore don’t care if anyone sees anyone having sex. Since I, the ultimate Sex Lord, have definitely already had sex it is now appropriate for every single human on earth, regardless of age or anything, to witness anyone else having sex. I mean, I’M okay with it, so therefore everyone else has to be okay with it.

I cannot believe that at the exact same time on this hell site, we have a post going around threatening to kill adults for listening to TikTok’s on full volume in public and a post going around saying everyone is SUPES COOL with people just fucking wherever they feel like in public. So this site is more offended by auditory disruption than literal sex crimes being perpetrated against them.

Make it make sense.

[sheher-gayboy]

Oh no! I'm going to be viscerally upset!

[cashmere-caveman]

this is what really happened to the franklin expedition btw

[khaopybara]

this gifset was brought to you just because i wanted to gif the second one.

[trashcatsnark]

Rejecting Lae'zel: yeah sorry not interested in you tasting my flesh lol- yeah you can go fuck astarion instead i don't care Rejecting Astarion: Say please.... ha, yeah, it's still a no, but that was funny, anyway... Rejecting Shadowheart: *didn't even realize i did it* Rejecting Gale, Wyll, or Karlach: Oh god, oh god, oh no I'm so so so so so so sorry, I, I really hope I didn't like lead you on- please don't look at me with those eyes, please, oh no, I'm so sorry I'm just doing a different romance right now, I still care about you so so so so so so so much, I'm sorry I'm just a terrible person, I'll be flaying myself alive tonight in penance, I'm so sorry-

[gobstoppr]

Tetris Fanart.

I've been playing tetris while listening to horror podcasts. and yeah

[aaronsinferno]

Canonically, Buck's relationship with Tommy is the spark that propels him into facing and embracing his bisexuality. This is a key narrative development, as Buck states that he wants to take his next steps forward with Tommy. This relationship, while not the sole focus of Buck's personal journey, undeniably influences it.

Again, while Buck’s personal growth is not dependent on Tommy, the narrative makes their relationship a valuable lens through which Buck’s sexuality and personal growth are explored. This does not diminish Buck’s individuality at all, but does show how personal connections can impact someone’s self-discovery.

[thefloatingstone]

Watching the "Making of" feature for Disney's 'Wish' where they go on and on about how amazing Walt was and how much he loved stories and fantasy and I'm having big feelings in the discord chat about it

[nkjemisin]

Hey there. I'm writing a story set in New York City and am not American. I have few characters, but most of them are arab or white. I can't help but feel a bit wrong about it, given that America is much more diverse than that, and NYC being an emblem of that. Do you think I should force myself to include more representation or should I just tell my story, and leave that more diverse cast to some other story I could write? I know this is a neverending debate and there are many opinions about it, but I've always agreed with everything you've said in matters of representation in fiction, and so I'd be curious to know your personal answer on it.

I'm a little confused by how you're using "representation," here. It sounds like you think representation = "randomly sticking BIPOC everywhere." I think when most people use that word, it means something more like "create an accurate or at least plausible depiction of a group or place." In actual New York, there are plenty of Middle Easterners and white people who live in relatively homogeneous small communities where they might only see someone of a different ethnicity on the subway. If your story is set in one of those communities -- and you do stick some random BIPOC in that subway scene, because that's plausible -- then it sounds like your characters might be an example of good representation.

(Note: if you're not writing something set in the real world, but it features human beings, it needs to represent humanity as a whole, unless there's a good in-world reason not to. But if it's our world? You can get specific.)

Here's the catch, tho: plausibility is relative. If you've absorbed some biases and haven't done enough research, then you might end up writing something that feels plausible to you, but which isn't actually representative or plausible to anyone else. The way to avoid this is to do the research and check (to the best of your ability) your biases. For example, you aren't American, I assume you've at least visited NYC? If not, you should. You can visit some of the communities I mentioned! You can eat in restaurants, visit mosques, have conversations with actual real people who are living the life you're writing about! If you don't have the time, money, or spoons to do that, there are other ways to do good research -- films and YT/Tiktok videos made by people from the communities in question, for example. But you'd need to watch a lot of them to get a good representative sample.

I recommend this book to all the writing students I've taught at Clarion, and other writer workshops: Writing the Other, by Nisi Shawl and Cynthia Ward. There's a particular part of it that seems relevant here, which is a kind of hierarchy of "appropriate" appropriation, I think first mentioned by Diantha Day Sprouse but included in Writing the Other. Basically it says that if you want to write about a culture that isn't your own, you can learn about that culture in one of several ways: a) You can be an Invader, and just go take whatever intellectual and artistic tidbits from that culture that you want, regardless of how damaging this might be to members of that group. Example: non-Indigenous people who write about actual secret practices, or who encourage the desecration of sacred places. b) You can be a Tourist, in which you're still mooching from that culture, but at least you're figuratively paying someone for it and accepting tidbits that the culture has chosen to sell. Example: getting a sensitivity reader. Or c) you can be an Invited Guest, who brings in as much as they take out, and who has formed relationships that are beneficial to all involved. Example: being part of an exchange program, both as a student and later as a host, and maintaining those friendships outside of the program.

The goal is to be an IG, but that isn't always possible. Tourist is still better than being an Invader. (...I feel like I'm leaving out a category. It's been a while since I read the book; any more recent readers want to check me here?) But the closer you can get to actually participating in that culture, the more your work will be informed by reality instead of biases or misinformation, and the more likely your work will read as plausible not just to you, but to your widest possible audience -- people familiar with the culture and people who aren't.

(I'm a little concerned about your phrasing of "force myself to include more representation," note. Why would that need to be a forced thing? A writer's goal should be to write something that feels lived-in and authentic to [if it's a real place] most people's experience -- not to meet some arbitrary standard, but because that's how you master immersion and characterization. If good immersion and characterization feel forced to you right now, that suggests you need more practice. I recommend writing short stories!)

[ghouldtime]

I feel like König can absolutely melt your heart like this in the kitchen while a big pot of stew is simmering. Feel like it would be mid winter, a cozy fire going in the living room, probably a smudge of paint on his face from having just completed the miniature diorama he made of your wedding day or something. I JUST FEEL LIKE HES SECRETLY A HOPELESS ROMANTIC

https://www.facebook.com/share/r/CZRSbWa5D1b2ryCA/?mibextid=uSdriS

(If you don't want to click the link, it's cool. It's like a really slow beautiful old timey princess kind of dance. Lots of twirling and the holding hands behind your back kind of thing?)

I'm sorry I'm bursting yet another bubble here 😭 while that's a sweet thought and he has plenty of romantic actions to boot, he's not a hopeless romantic or even close to it.

A hopeless romantic is someone who believes in love conquering all and they have an idealistic view of it. They're someone who believes in love, no matter what they've seen or their past. They're someone who holds onto love above all and usually centers their life around it.

He doesn't even come close. Truth be told, he's extremely pessimistic and is near the polar opposite of that 😭

He's seen a lot, experienced a lot, and has never been one to feel that way. After being ruthlessly bullied as a kid for simply existing as himself and seeing his comrades torn into meat confetti for stepping one foot too far, he's doesn't exactly have a pearly world view. He doesn't think about love first, or second, or even third, fourth, or fifth. Love wasn't a focus for him or an interest - it wasn't a necessity in that department, he's been without romantic love most of his life, why would he need it then or now?

Love didn't stop bullets from spiraling towards you on the field, love can't conquer all when things like hate, retribution, and vengeance are sung much stronger in his world. Love could motivate but it destroyed many from the inside out. He wasn't going to start believing in love or wanting it just cause.

Sure, he had familial love. He loves his parents and that did wonders in a world that was usually otherwise cruel towards him. But romantic? He wasn't ever particularly interested. To him, it's usually yet another complication in the line of things. And anyone who is nice to him, he's usually suspicious of. He doesn't let people close for a reason.

Quite frankly, he usually thinks others have ulterior motives, especially if they're trying to cozy up to him. All his life, he's pretty much been an outcast. People tended to only be nice when they wanted something. He can count on one hand the few people who have genuinely been nice to him without WANTING something from him, whether that be his perks with his rank or just to have him as a human shield as they charge into battle.

He was the awkward kid, the loner, the one no one talked to in school. He never had a romantic life there. And he went straight to the military which left him no time or room for one - not that he cared for it. It's just not something he cared for or went after because he hadn't really experienced it and it wouldn't do him any good. He's seen how many marriages end and heard of all the troubles.

He was never actively looking for it or thinking of love. He wasn't seeking it because he's seen how miserable people are in and out of it. He's very much "if it happens, it happens. If it doesn't, I'm happy with being me." König is a very independent man, he's fine on his own and is content with himself and where he stands.

I actually wouldn't describe him as any kind of romantic aside from unintentional because it's not a conscious thought! He's not doing it to woo or impress or to be a big gesture, he's just doing it because he likes you and wants to see you happy. What he does isn't born out of romance or desire or the want for either - it's just from the heart. It's an instinct.

He's not thinking of how romantic it would be as he plants your favorite flowers in his garden. He's growing them because he wants to see you happy and wants to put more of what you like in the world. He stocks your favorite drinks and snacks in his house because he wants you over - he wants you happy, comfortable, and enjoying his company. His actions are how he shows how he feels, but he's also not actively doing it because he's enamored with love itself or loving and how it feels. He doesn't care about the idea of love in particular, but he cares about you and what he feels for you.

He isn't making a diorama of the wedding because it's a romantic gesture, he's doing it because it captured how you both felt that day - and how truly beautiful you were in that moment, outshining the stars that danced above that night. He's memorializing his love in every brushstroke and clay flower, making sure to take extra care on the model he built of you. If he could relive any day over and over, it would be that. Sadly, he doesn't have that power, so he'll stick for the photos that captured it and the replicas he could make to truly memorialize it in the physical realm for years to come.

König's love isn't flashy, it isn't showy, it isn't meant to be something grand or fairytale levels of romance. It's simply his. Will he make you a ballgown if you wanted? Absolutely, but he's no prince, nor a king despite his name. Will he dance with you like that if you wanted? Absolutely. But that's not his first thought or a fantasy he really thinks of unless you implement it in his head. He's just him, living in the smaller moments of life. He doesn't need to show off to the world, he doesn't need it to be extravagant or formal, he doesn't need it to be by the books romantic - all of what he does is heartfelt, that's what he knows matters. And it has to be with and for you 💚 that's what matters the most

He's more one for holding you close and slow dancing in the kitchen as the water in the kettle boils, with no rush to be anywhere else. He's not hopelessly romantic, he's not even intentionally romantic, the only thing he's hopelessly in is love 💚

Besides, he's gotta save some moves for the wedding to make it that much more special 👀(he's signing you both up for ballroom dancing the second you express wanting anything like that. He's already picking out the fabric for the dress too)

[marzipanandminutiae]

yes this is about the stupid "make everyone bi button" poll

like I'm sorry. If you can't see any reason a gay person would be bothered by the sentiment of "oh you just need to be attracted to the binary-opposite gender and then you'd be Better! I would do this to you without your consent if given the option!" besides biphobia

especially when people in our own damn community express this sentiment

what is wrong with you

(especially takes on a added dimension with lesbians, because we all know how much society loves punishing women who dare to have ANYTHING in our lives that's not Inclusive Of Men At All Times- and no that is not a dogwhistle; t*rfs can fuck right off. but it is still true; "what about men?!?!?!" still frequently drowns out conversations about misogyny even in queer and/or ostensibly progressive circles)

[velvetjune]

I like how Jessica Preddy says Rose is not in love or infatuated with Alan, but it’s her third job, her life calling. the unstoppable President of the Alan Wake fan club, genuinely Alan’s strongest soldier. (Source: Remedy YouTube)

[crimeronan]

another Vital AU hunter-and-camila thought from this morning was a thought of, like. camila very very very gently and carefully explaining that she'd like luz to get a basic physical done by a doctor in the human realm, because luz has not been seen by a human doctor since she was four and is overdue for ten million vaccines and desperately needs bloodwork to check her vitamin and thyroid levels, etc, etc, etc, and hunter is like. visibly freaked out and upset by this. bc he is SO afraid of strangers hurting luz.

anyway. that's all pretty much expected, on account of The Horrors.

what got me in my feelings was the thought of camila telling hunter that she has a lot of the same worries, and that she Knows not all human healers have good intentions, and that she Promises she'll take that into account when finding one for luz. because she does not want luz to get hurt.

hunter, naturally, is like "how.... do you know that....?" and camila is like ay dios mio. HOW do i explain medical racism or the united states..... to a boy.... with no concept of racism or the united states.....

[butterflysonnets]

yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.

to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!

i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.

also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.

they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.

they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.

i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.

[starrysharks]

i want to delete my twitter account so fucking bad

[laprasboat]

i cant tell what's worse, someone comparing writing smut to the shit shane dawson was accused of, or that apparently 1300 people agree