#so I’m not quite convinced
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Iron Man (1968) #64
#I’m a bit hmm regarding that Tony’s feelings for Pepper are completely settled#and that him having a relationship with Roxie Gilbert can be made to work#the conclusion that Tony’s come to here is that Pepper’s place is with Happy#but Tony was not the start of their issues so I don’t think he’d be the end of it either#it remains to me seen if they can get their lifestyle preferences sorted#and Roxie saying#‘I can never forget the murder his munitions rained on Viet Nam for more than a decade!#And yet… perhaps I can forgive him those crimes in the name of good intentions- if tragically misplaced’#is some really weak reasoning#so I’m not quite convinced#though it does look like Roxie’s not as young as I thought cause I was thinking she was college-aged#and forgot she owned a health foods store#actually even aside from how he built his fortune his wealth could still provide a conflict in their relationship#last issue she insisting on splitting cab fare with him#but not everything in his life is something that she can afford to pay half of#also I really like that Pepper’s hatred for Iron Man is being brought up directly#because it was really striking to me in the last batch of issues I read#there was a part where she had been told that Iron Man was dead and then Tony came across her crying#and he was like btw Iron Man isn’t actually dead but also why are you crying cause I know you wouldn’t cry for Iron Man#like damn#also it would just be a really big deal if Pepper finally learned that Tony is Iron Man in the upcoming issues#marvel#tony stark#roxie gilbert#pepper potts#happy hogan#my posts#comic panels
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Why do you think the tides have slightly turned from "Elia deserves better than Rhaegar" to shipping her and Rhaegar together? Like what is the psychology behind these people because I've seen some of them like/reblog anti Rhaegar posts while also shipping Rhaegar x Elia at the same time.
hey anon! my thoughts are a bit messy, but i’ve done my best to explain them coherently :)
so, rhaegar was the best man anyone could have when elia was alive, and most people want the best for their favs. he was considered the most handsome, didn’t have a bad personality, and he was crown prince—meaning elia was almost queen, which is often seen as the greatest role a woman can have. the narrative also treats rhaegar as a beautiful, tragic, haunting figure, and elia actually had this very aesthetically pleasing man all to herself at one point! she was married to him, had children with him, and her life was so close to perfect! but rhaegar just had to go and ruin it. 😠
for many elia stans, if rhaegar hadn’t fallen in love with another woman (they want him to have been a completely different character), then everything would’ve been perfect, and elia would’ve had the best, most desirable life. however, that’s not what happened—elia met a very tragic end, and as a result, these stans feel double the bitterness. because of this bitterness, they blame rhaegar for everything (even though it’s not logical to do so), but he’s just too ‘perfect’ to let go of. so, for years these stans have made rhaegar revolve around elia, filling his tag with posts about her out of bitterness. so, i do believe that this obsession with rhaegar x elia has always been there, but i think it’s become a more favorable stance on the elia stan side of the fandom because of a mix of reasons.
plus, rhaegar is one of the few canon relationships we know elia had, since she’s not much of a character. because of this, and the fact that most people don’t like to stray too far from canon, most elia stans are forced to focus on rhaegar, which has created an echo chamber. basically, if a sentiment about elia and rhaegar’s relationship becomes popular, then the whole elia stan side of the fandom will likely regurgitate the sentiment. (also, this desire to stick close to canon is likely why the elia x arthur ship was so popular. while it’s a total crack ship, it had good aesthetics, and since elia and arthur at least knew each other, it allowed the stans to create their perfect fanfiction whilst sticking it to rhaegar. but remember, elia was actually married to rhaegar and had children with him, so while arthur is cool, rhaegar was always ‘top dog,’ meaning arthur would never be able to match up to rhaegar to most elia stans. also, the arthur x elia crack ship is likely her second most popular ship, which just shows how little elia stans have to work with, so they’re always forced to eventually return back to rhaegar for a lot of things.)
however, even if the elia x rhaegar ship gains more popularity, these stans will never stop hating rhaegar because he wasn’t ‘perfect’—and he wasn’t perfect because he didn’t love elia. plus, rhaegar loving another woman and supposedly kidnapping her is what began the war that led to elia’s tragic death. that’s bitterness times 1000. and while i don’t actually blame rhaegar for the war, i do think that this is how an elia stan sees it. i also don’t view rhaegar’s complex relationship with elia as a bad thing—it’s actually a very realistic take on an arranged marriage between two decent people. but most elia stans will never be able to get over the fact that they almost had everything, which is why many have it out for lyanna, as they consider her a thief who ruined their ‘perfection.’
tbh, that might be why so many elia stans are so obsessed with the idea that rhaegar only got with lyanna because of the prophecy—they don’t want to believe that rhaegar actually loved a different woman and not their perfect self insert elia. that’s a bit mean of me… but i don’t know what else one would call the ‘elia’ elia stans have created.
now that i’ve laid all those thoughts out, i’ll try to explain why the tides seem to be turning… i think it may have something to do with the ‘targaryens are all evil and bad’ sentiment losing popularity. i think this shift has occurred due to a mix of factors, such as years of fandom fights and fandom cycles leading to the targs being more liked now than before. it helps that canon doesn’t actually condemn the targs/favors them quite a bit, and the influx of new targ fans from HOTD has also contributed. this combination of reasons seems to have shifted the way the mainstream fandom discusses all the targaryen characters, including rhaegar. so, with this shift, it’s only natural that some elia stans/elia x rhaegar shippers—who’ve always been there—are using this opportunity to push their agenda. while these stans still hate rhaegar and see him as the bad guy, they just can’t let go of him. and as the mainstream fandom moves away from the anti targaryen sentiment, these smaller corners of the fandom, which tend to be echo chambers, are also affected, which has therefore led to a rise in rhaegar x elia shippers and the ‘shifting tide’ that you’ve also noticed.
#‘if only rhaegar did this’ is a very common sentiment amongst elia stans#most stans have always had the ‘if only’ mindset#‘if only elia survived’ easily leads to ‘if only rhaegar didn’t run off with his whore’ as the targs become less hated#it’s kinda a pipeline? rhaegar anti plus elia stan leads to rhaegar x elia shipper who still hates rhaegar#another reason that a lot of this happens is because elia and the martells plus dorne are the good ‘others’ a person can like#while the targaryens are the ‘bad others’ one can safely hate as they’re white & have a bit of demon symbolism + come from an ‘evil’ empire#the targs also ruled over everyone so a lot of fans like pushing all the blame onto them for all the problems#however the targs are cool and they’re hot af and being royalty is the best! so they’re the ‘bad others’ one can safely hate#but people still want their aesthetic and want their favs to have what the targs had. all the cool magic + the aesthetic + danys monikers#so people can convince themselves that it’s okay and logical and right to hate the targs but most ppl will still connect their favs to them#of course… things have been shifting in the fandom which i’m very happy about#and all of these sentiments are combined and compressed when it comes to rhaegar and elias relationship#so any big shift on how the fandom views the targs will always affect the way rhaegar and elias relationship is viewed#it just so happens that the targs aren’t the evil dragon nazis anymore so it’s kinda okay for elia stans to ship him with her#i’m not gonna go through my tags and make sure they make sense so i’m simply hoping for the best#anyways… i hope i didn’t digress too much. i just found this shift so interesting so i couldn’t help myself#asoiaf fandom critical#anti elia stans#rhaegar targaryen#anti rhaegar x elia#house targaryen#valyrianscrolls#pro rhaelya#lyanna stark#rhaegar x lyanna#anon ask#thanks anon this was a fun topic to cover#i recently found a really old post about both elia and lyanna and boy… it was quite discusting to read#elia stans kinda cycle from ‘elia deserved better x crack ship with shallow aesthetic’ back to elia x rhaegar while shitting on rhaelya#just know that rhaegar is always the bad guy to them! the sentiment on lyanna will go from hot to cold but rhaelya is always bad as well!
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LISTEN. If we get a bisexual!Buck arc, I will ACTUALLY LITERALLY CRY, I’m already emotional just thinking about it, it will literally bring me so much joy
BUT
I don’t want it at the expense of an Eddie coming out arc…
Bc listen, I read a post talking abt how the writers probably won’t give both of them a really flushed out Queer Realization Arc bc it would be redundant, which like, okay sure, yes, I can see why you wouldn’t want to have two main, male characters going through the exact same thing, so sure, whatever, BUT -
I feel like, out of Buddie, Eddie is going to be the one that really struggles with coming to terms with his sexuality.
Eddie, who had to be The Man Of The House at 10 years old. Eddie, who grew up in the Deep South. Eddie, whose family is Catholic. Eddie, who already had a strained relationship with his judgmental parents. Eddie, who had a WIFE. Eddie, who says that what he had with Shannon was magic & compares every relationship he had to her. Eddie, who was in the military, which is infamous for DADT. Eddie, whose aunt constantly pushes him at random women because he needs to not be alone. Eddie, who canonically suffers from comp-het, saying that dating women feels like putting on a performance, not that he understands why. Eddie, who dated Ana & was planning on staying with her, even though he was unhappy, for his son.
I think Buck would be way chiller with realizing he’s queer - if he doesn’t already know, which is my fav head-cannon - & I feel like he wouldn’t struggle as much bc it’s Eddie, & Eddie is his best friend, and gender wouldn’t play as big a part for him as I think it would for Eddie.
I would love for them both to have an arc where they worked through their expectations when it comes to relationships & realize that they’re queer, but idk man, I feel like Eddie is going to be the one to really struggle & he deserves to really have that flushed out.
Idk, I’ve been thinking about this ever since I saw that post & nobody I know watches 9-1-1 😭
#buddie#911 abc#evan buckley#eddie diaz#911#Queer Buddie Arcs#I want them both to have nice things is that really so unreasonable?#literally all of their other arcs take place at the same time#let them realize they’re queer & in love with each other at the same time too#honestly this only applies if Buddie goes canon which I’m not even convinced is going to happen#i have so many feelings#Buck would just be like “I’m in love with my best friend? fucking dope#bc my darling boy just wants to be loved & chosen & Eddie has already done those things#either way I wish they would stop putting them with random ass women who have been on the show for less than 10 minutes#I don’t need them to go canon in s7 but if we don’t even get a HINT of it this season I’ll probably quit watching#unless s7 is REALLY good bc they put some WEIRD shit in recently that I dfw#I have no idea how Tumblr is supposed to work am I doing this right? idk pls advise
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Hi, it's me again. I decided to follow your advice and try to seek out your 'actually serious' analysis, which led me to your komahina bible, the most easy to find compilation of this supposed analysis. Here are my thoughts-
1) Overview
- Most of this 'analysis' isn't analysis but a summary/overview of the game. It's not so much a 'bible' as a children's book summary of the bible, which at that point it would be better to play the actual game itself. It's clear it was made for a presentation on the 'uninitiated' if you will, but if that's the case, you shouldn't be advertising it as the literal bible on the subject.
- When you are not regurgitating points from the game beat by beat, the screen is halfway filled with either manga panels or fanart. My gripes with manga panels are, that even though they do depict the events of the game, the way they can be depicted by the artist can be pretty subjective due to the freedom of the medium in comparison to sprites, and that the role of one character can differ depending on whose pov manga it is (chiaki vs nagito). Fan art therefore should be scrutinized even more since it fully depicts abstracted and even the fandomified version of events, leading to situations where it's either unclear what is actually happening or betrays your more shallow view of the characters (i talk abt this later.)
- When you do use pictures directly from the game it's either a possible screenshot from a memorable moment or dialog from the wiki, limited almost exclusively to the freetime events. This leads me to believe that you haven't actually played the game(there are other factors hinting towards this) or watched a Let's Play of it, but going off of merely information that's already widely known and circulating within the fandom, and easy to search on the wiki.
2) Incorrect/Questionable information
Here I'll compile a lot of information that's either plainly wrong or baffling to having come to that conclusion , leading more credence to the theory that you either haven't actually played the game or your memory of it isnt as good as you think.
-"if Nagito's plan went off of without a hitch, he would have killed anyone that was closes to him at the time" plainly wrong. Komaeda's goal from the start was to make himself the victim, so by dying this way his death could have meaning and help the others. For somebody that keeps talking about Komaeda's "Martyr complex" this is truly a weird take to have.
-"Nagito...got the nurse for sure sick" is there any proof that specifically points to Komaeda for this? I believe the takeaway should've been that Mikan got sick because she was around all of them AND she overworked herself trying to take care of them. Is this just an awkwardly phrased attempt to make more of a connection between Tsumiki and Komaeda? I don't think you needed more than the ones that already existed.
- "he helps Junko brainwash a bunch of students" Kamukura at neither point in the anime or Danganronpa 0 was ever specifically implicated in the brainwashing. He never 'helps' Junko, especially in that way. If you meant, participates in the student council killing game, you should've said that, but even then his agency and influence is limited.
-"they found the Remnants and captured them!"...no, they didn't. The Remnants presented themselves as survivors and the Foundation took them in. They handed themselves over willingly. It was a pretty big piece of the final part of the game...
3) Komaeda and Komahina
- "Nagito's habit of putting people on pedestals" Where. Sure, he certainly parrots the belief that the "Ultimates" as a unit are at the top of the food chain and should be prioritised, but its clear that doesn't exactly carry over to his classmates like teruteru, Kuzuryu and even Souda sometimes. Just because of a few positive comments refering to them as Ultimates and the trial which he literally breaks down in, this is a hard position to support.
-"Nagito manipulates Hajime into playing the game" How. He literally just told him to play it. How is that manipulation. Also, isn't it a bit unfair to put the blame on Koizumi's death to him as well? I think they were multiple factors playing into this, but sure, how else are you gonna convince people that Komaeda is a twisted fucking cyclepath that loves leading people to their deaths.
-The way that you say the Kuzuryu/Pekoyama relationship mirrors Komahina as 'I will give up my agency for you/ I just want you' is also confusing. Unless of course you mirror Peko's struggle with her agency and harmful beliefs the clan enforced on her with Komaeda's own belief system, in which case, idk man, i feel like you are giving a bit too much credit to the supposed severity of Komaeda's views and trying too hard to make Hinata the 'rational' and 'grounding' one in the relationship.
- Again, the amount of times you refer to Komaeda as a freak for doing something 'weird' or even being drawn weirdly doing it , mostly in the manga, makes me belief this isn't just an affectionate tongue in cheek joke as you claim, but an actual way in which your interpretation of Komaeda is colored.
-"it doesn't excuse his nonchalance towards tragedy and murder but explains it" what needs to be excused here exactly? Komaeda doesn't need to immediately bawl his eyes out when someone gets killed or else he's suspicious and...bad? I am confused with what you mean by this. If you mean that Komeada shouldn't be so nonchalant about murder because he's constantly trying to kill someone else, that is plainly incorrect and i explained above why.
-Posturing about Komaeda's 'black and white thinking' while in the next exact slide you show fanart of him smugly explaining he has Borderline. First, i want you to explain to me the black and white thinking in a way that isn't "oh, the friends and classmates i previously liked turned out to be fucking terrorists". I think that's a pretty justifiable situation for your thinking to go from white to black. Also, if that is enough credence to assign Komaeda BPD, you really don't know how BPD works, especially since you assigned it to the one character you constantly talk about being a freak (and also lust...pseudo lust? after).
- The insistence with Hinata not really understanding Komaeda and running away, even if he wants to understands him is pretty suspect, especially when compared to the game. Hinata is confused and overwhelmed yes, but it's not just that he wants to understand Komaeda but that he still feels fondness for him, he still follows his advice and puts his faith in him and the way he mourns him in Chapter 5 is also pretty indicative of this. It's just another part in the pattern in you making Hinata the confused, rational, 'morally pure' man that's 'tempted' by 'corrupted' manic pixie mentally ill demon Komaeda. Something tells me your priest AU isn't so much playing with dolls as much as...what you actually believe these characters dynamic is.
- The whole page where Servant is basically made into a joke about how hot and sexy and freaky he is doesn't help your point either.
-The most damning evidence of course is a drawing in the second to last slide, wherein Komaeda is supposed to be analogous to 'guy who has something wrong with him' (distorted, freak, mentally ill) and Hinata is analogous to the guy that 'is the only one that understands them' (the rational one, the relationship of understanding doesn't go both ways).
- Your slide with sources is pretty vague and unclear. Also the way that you credit "Your superior mind" before the game itself when all you've been doing is repeating and misinterpreting the plot of the game is ...ironic
So yeah, that's all I got. Feel free to 'debunk' my observations as much as you please, I just want to know if there's actual basis behind everything you just said or I should go digging for 'the actual serious analysis' yet again.
i think you forgot that fandom is meant to be fun
#ask#anon#tw anon hate#i’m not gonna go through each individual point here bc frankly that’d be a waste of my time#so i’m just going to say this:#i am someone who makes jokes. funny haha jokes. i Laugh. i Shitpost. Common Fandom Behavior#‘freak’ is a word i use to refer to myself more often than anyone else#i view it with a positive connotation. and also kmda is objectively weird!! that is part of what makes his character good#i use 2 definitions of ‘freak’: the first is Related To Sex and the second is Strange Or Bizarre#komaeda is a strange and bizarre person who is regularly used for fanservice#you could for sure say maybe i have some sort of bias with calling people ‘freaks’ but for you to assume ill intent is nasty#that presentation was made to give my irl friends an understanding of what i mean when i talk abt kmhn#‘kmhn bible’ is a JOKE title. it’s a BIT. i don’t know if you’ve noticed but i try to have fun around here#anywho. i’m not going to argue semantics with someone who is clearly convinced that i couldn’t possibly know what i’m talking about#that’s not worth my time or energy.#i’m going to continue to have fun on the internet with my friends. i am going to continue making my funny jokes#i am going to continue to make weird bad not-quite-horny art. and i’m going to be happy#you can either block me like an adult and move on with your life. or you can send me another anon#if you do send me that ask know that i will block you. this is a conversation i am done having#because i will not have these conversations with people who refuse fo respect me#it’s clear that you have it in your head that you’re smarter than me. which sure whatever believe what you want idgaf#but regardless of how you view me i am not obligated to prove myself to you. ever#thanks for downloading my funny little powerpoint though ^_^
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need an age regression/de-aging fic where a post-KH4 riku has to take care of a younger sora, and bb sora is just completely awestruck over how strong and kind and pretty (and tall!!) his best friend riku got… and is so transparently smitten that riku, who is actually dating present-day sora, is just like: wow we really were oblivious how did either of us miss sora’s glaring crush on me??
#soriku#i’m picturing like… sora right before kh1 or post-kh2#old enough to have butterflies over this other riku but not quite old enough to know what it means yet#just a puppy crush#there’s angst potential too if it’s kh2 sora before he found his riku#so he throws himself sobbing at older riku#but a BBS sora bouncing around teen riku would be very cute also#anyway i would write it myself but i don’t have the time#also am not confident about writing children#i just want riku getting to see firsthand that he wasn’t the only one pining for years and years#and that sora always loved him even at his worst#8yo sora doesn’t care that his riku teased him sometimes he still wants to play games with big riku#10yo sora doesn’t understand why his riku said they’re too old to hold hands#and is thrilled that big riku is happy to give him hugs and ruffle his hair#kh1 sora doesn’t care about their old ‘rivalry’ or that his riku was working with maleficent#he is just overjoyed to learn that riku came back to the side of light and that they get to be friends again#kh2 sora is loud about how much he missed him and very impressed by how far riku has come as a keyblade master#(also blushes when he sees him working out and then is confused as to why)#(i am thinking of that one manga panel where sora talks about riku’s “big arms” and how he can carry big logs by himself lmfao)#any of these soras would follow a cool older riku around like a duckling and be wowed by everything he does i am convinced
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i’m trying to successfully coerce my aunt into coming to see the outsiders with me-hoping to make enough money to be able to buy tickets-i have my outsiders book from eighth grade when i first read it and i think it’d be fun to get the cast to sign it if things work out the way i plan-fingers crossed!
#the outsiders#the outsiders musical#not me thinking about this 24/7#this is the only thing getting me through work because i’m gonna have to quit in september apparently so i can focus on school#so im gonna try to work my ass off to get tickets#my aunt loves the outsiders-she said it’s the movie that made her realize she loved men#and i think it’d be fun to bring her if i can a. get money to and b. convince my aunt to come with me#pray for me
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Meeting someone else with a shared special interest is wild because you’re either going to spend hours talking or you’re going to get into a fight
#emma posts#my autism#my adhd#the drama#or complete lack of it#it’s a toss up#this is how it feels to use Reddit tbh#there’s a reason i only open it a few times a month#but this was also a bit close to what being in knowledge bowl felt like#or maybe more accurately your favorite class#or a sleepover with that other autistic kid that also loved (insert shared interest)#the knowledge bowl example wasn’t quite the same because the in the team I worked best on we all had extensive knowledge in different areas#the team I worked worst on was in the first year I tried it. I was the youngest and only one other person there really knew me#and we had an awkward history. so I wasn’t taken seriously#and sometimes the person with the tense relationship would intentionally convince the other kids to do the opposite of what i said#which would end badly since I’m obsessed with many of the topics I chimed in on#and thus knew the answers to most 😑 I quit that year#and i didn’t try to join again until senior year. my classmates took me seriously and I got put on a team without past drama#one of the people was my own cousin and luckily one I have a good history with 😅#people say if I loved it so much it’s a shame I didn’t do it sooner. but that other person was a year older and would have probably kept#doing what caused the problem. plus I was more exhausted
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#very paranoid thought but i’m slowly becoming convinced that my manager is beefing w me or smth but won’t let me on to it#bc they’re changing the shifts the whole time && i’ve had no opens in like 2wks#&& ik that slowly fucking w someone’s hours & refusing to say anything directly is SO his game but i’ve also not worked w him in like a#*month so i’ve no clue#ppp#was telling one of the guys abt the mfa thing & he was like ‘oh well like yk. don’t let it fuck w ur mental health’#& i was like huh?? bc i’d honestly been thinking of it as a chance to rly justify quitting rather than having any intention of staying &#doing both at the same time - but since that’s in my head now i can’t let go of it#idk. if it’s shit enough i’m gonna quit pre-christmas. no interest in doing that again#but i also got told i was paro for thinking that i’d jumped up in the TL possibilities bc someone else had fallen out of favour#& that was 1/2 true ! if only a month earlier than anything happening
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Captain America (2018) #1
#I’m not sure I’m quite convinced of Steve being this unused to seeing people die#I know that he’s this unrealistically perfect character and so he shouldn’t get that numb to these things#but by this point he should have a lot of experience with death#I know there’s that thing about Bucky doing his dirty work during WWII but Steve wasn’t /that/ uninvolved#but this isn’t near as bad as Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes (2005) trying to claim#that Steve had somehow never killed another person before#marvel#steve rogers#bucky barnes#my posts#comic panels
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#vent ahead sorry#i’ve just been in the worst. idk. fog#part of it is summer i hate summer#but i can’t convince myself that i am anything except supremely fucking annoying#i feel like nothing i do is quite enough#and the way i am is just weird and incompatible with living and socializing#and yeah i am genuinely anxious about being on tumblr lately because#i mean this has been how i’ve felt for a long time#i really don’t think anyone fucking likes me😭#it’s not like i talk to enough people for it to matter i guess but also why Would anyone want to talk to me#idk. i feel like everyone prefers other people over me#and it’s FINE that isn’t NEW i’m just. ugh#life has sucked so yeah i guess i have to be depressed to match it#delete later
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On the topic of Porsche’s dad getting killed, it is such lazy misogynistic writing that Nampheung faints in response to her husband being killed. Like this is a woman who, as far as we know, was raised by two separate mafia families at different points, she would hardly be unaccustomed to death (esp the death of loved ones since we know her whole birth family died). Why is she relegated to the role of swooning damsel instead of being allowed to Do Anything in response.
#kinnporsche#kinnporsche spoilers#correct me if I’m wrong on the two mafia families thing#but they say she was apart of a ‘rival family’ so it seems a safe assumption#quite frankly I don’t buy that she actually tried to kill herself#unless she believed that Porsche and Chay were dead which isn’t unlikely#then Korn letting off those gunshots would serve two purposes I guess#convincing her AND Gun that everyone was dead#anyway I think nampheung should get to kill Korn everyone else has to wait in line behind her
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everyone please do me a favor and stop romanticizing this musical and please do not show it to your eleven-year-old
#this is why i miss it when we were a small fandom#this is why i don't like fandom anymore#y'all can't handle it#and like this is at least a 15+ show#the covers of kids singing are cute ig but please tell me they only know one or two songs and not the rest#this is not a kids show!!!#and you adults out there enjoying it: be adults about it#quit the romanticization of cannibalism and murder#some of you have gone too far#*❈ ‣ i’m a silly little ninnynoodle — ( ooc. )#tbd.#i don't even care how i sound in this rant i'm so sick of it#the way people handle this musical is disguising sometimes#i'm not above humor but the line has been blurred#t.urpin is disgusting#l.ovett is disgusting#s.weeney is disgusting#don't try to convince me otherwise
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Me when my life is trauma and mental illness all the way down but I am determined to make something good of it in the end
#I’m in such a weird spot right now because I can barely remember anything positive that’s ever happened in my life#every time I look back on any year I just see all the pain. and there has been lots of pain#and I know logically there was joy or happiness or something positive or I would’ve killed myself a long time ago#but I can’t remember it at all and my brain is trying to convince me I should kill myself now so I can escape the pain#if my life is just going to continue being pain#I know it’s not true. there’s been joy in my life before and there will be again but everything just hurts so bad#I don’t know how long I can keep going for#but even if I quit my job or drop out of school I’ll have to stay with my parents and that makes me want to kill myself more#in fact maybe that’s what’s making me so suicidal. staying with them now is not triggering my hypervigilance but it is making me flashback#to every trauma I’ve ever had much more often than usual#I’m not myself right now and I need to remember that there is a me to get back to#maybe I’ll go out tonight and remember I’m not destined be stuck in my parent’s house for the rest of my life#anne speaks#like. I realise that yeah I’ve had a great deal of pain in my life (I don’t mean to be navel gazing and also I have been super privileged in#a lot of ways but also ten mental illness and child abuse and ptsd three times over is a little excessive I think)#but there was joy before and there will be joy again! even if I’m exhausted I’m gonna hold on like I always have and one day I’ll be#glad I did#it sounds and feels trite but it’s happened before and it won’t be trite when it’s true#tw suicidality#tw suicide mention
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Does anyone else not use shampoo or conditioner?
#and my hair is fine#I quit about 2 years ago#I’m so glad I did#I’m saving money and my hair feels healthier#and I am more convinced than ever that capitalism is scamming us#the way I wash my hair is just that I take extra long in the shower to thoroughly scrub my scalp with my fingers#and rinse water repeatedly through my hair#when you think about it it makes sense chemically and logically#soap isn’t magic goo#it works by making oils mix with water more easily#if you don’t use soap#it’s still possibly to remove oil from whatever you’re washing#it just takes longer and there’s likely to still be a thin residual coat of oil left behind#think of washing dishes for example#and the thing is that your hair and skin benefit from retaining a small amount of residual oil#when you strip them bare it makes them dry and unhealthy#and for hair at least it immediately starts overproducing oil to compensate#so your hair actually gets oily faster#look it up there are other people talking about it too#or DM me#campost
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#i hate crying about things bc before crying i’m so convinced and ready to just drop everything and bolt#but after i’m like no it’s not that serious no i’m overreacting#girl (gn) you were literally about to quit and cry to your parents and maybe even kill yourself wdym it’s not that serious
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I feel like just telling people “consume less childrens media/YA fiction/etc” is missing the point.
A narrow, sheltered perspective on the world and its politics is what causes stupid discourse, and the simplified world of entertainment media attracts people with this mindset.
Having any kind of media as the dominant lens through which you socialize and interact with the world will leave you sidelined from reality, whether your energy is devoted to complex literature or a tv show for toddlers.
Children’s media and their fans make for easy targets because the disproportionate scale of discourse to depth is more visible, but focusing on the kind of media as the main problem seems to me similarly detached from reality. The problem is the attitude. And telling someone who clings to any kind of media as a tenuous connection to others that they’ve wasted their time isn’t really going to change their mind.
So, like, do you actually have any intention of challenging this kind of attitude, or are you just trying to feel superior to someone else?
#indexed post#In other words: Someone isn’t acting stupid because they like children’s media.#They like children’s media because it’s easy to act stupid about.#I think that Twitter discourse corroborates my case here. A lot of Quote Retweet Ghouls are not in fandoms#They will literally just get mad about anything#And I’m talking a little pissy here but the point is that if someone is engaging in stupid discourse they’re not resigned to that#They Can Leave. They can reconnect with the world around them#And balance the things they care about in the real world with the ways they show up in stories#And sometimes they need a little push to do that. They need to know that a (more) grounded life offers many rewards.#But it’s not as simple as ‘quit watching cocomelon you dumbass’. you haven’t fixed the problem and also you were an asshole about it.#And if I wanted to convince people out of this I would start by not calling their discourse stupid because I know it matters to them.#But I can contain multitudes. So how about that.#Anyways I just think it is sad that some of the messaging is ‘think less about the thing you like because it’s stupid’#And not instead ‘think more about the other things in your life and how you can connect with them alongside your interests’
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