#snarky little shit saturday

[jessieren]

Snarky little shit Saturday

To be filed under: If you ask people if they're sleeping with someone in that tone don't be surprised that you get slapped...

I mean, seriously, I'm no fan of Mrs Robinson, sorry Richardson but you deserved that 10000%

[oeuvrinarydurian]

It’s SNARKY LITTLE SHIT SATURDAY!

I haven’t posted one of these in a bit.

Clearly, Teenage Morse does not care for magic.

He wants to get on with it, after his multiple-months hiatus chopping wood, lakeside, drinking and doing God knows what else. He wants to avenge his friend’s death, find the heroin…& all Fred wants to do is hang out with the carny folk.

[librawritesstuff]

Snarky Little Shit Saturday

You *know* that in about 3.7 seconds that SOMEONE is going to be on the receiving end of razor-sharp verbiage

[fanficrocks]

What is it that you're all hoping to be liberated from, exactly? Is it just the dishes, or light housekeeping in general?

Trying on the snark with Dorothea Frazil........ doesn't last too long though (thankfully for Morse)!

[too-antigonish]

Snarky Little Shit Saturday

A late add-on to @librawritesstuff's Snarky Little Shit Saturday:

Love this one. And he is being *such* a snarky little shit.

I'd also love it if anyone knows who made this gif.

I'm usually pretty careful about recording authorship for anything I save, but I somehow messed up on this one.

[wannabeschyulersister]

I need some Carmen berzatto! Reader licking frosting off his fingers 🥵

Baking was something that you liked to do when you were stressed after a long day. You weren’t the best at it. Like nowhere near Marcus’ level but you enjoyed the process.

Marcus let you shadow him one random Wednesday as he taught you some basics. Carmy told him that you had gotten into baking as a stress reliever and Marcus wanted you to see him in action.

It was nerve wracking to say the least but you did enjoy the time you spent with Marcus. The kitchen was busy but you focused solely on what he was doing. It was truly like watching an artist at work.

Now, you were in the middle of making homemade frosting for the chocolate cake you just baked. It was nearly midnight and you definitely should’ve been getting some much needed rest. It was Friday, well early Saturday morning, so you could sleep in.

The front door to your apartment opened and closed. Carmen had a long day at the restaurant and couldn’t wait to get some sleep. He had been thinking of nothing more than getting under the sheets with your body molded right next to his.

He took off his coat and set his keys by the small table. He heard noise from the kitchen and was surprised that you were still awake. “(Y/n)?”

“Who else would it be?” You answered like a smartass.

Carmen rolled his eyes at your joke and made his way into the kitchen. He noticed the dirty mixing bowls, measuring cup and the flour that was on your right cheek. “Have a long day?” He walked to the sink and washed his hands.

“Yeah, I just felt a little restless and wanted to make a cake.”

“You want to talk about it?” Carmen was tired as fuck but if you needed to decompress and tell him about your day, he didn’t mind spending some more time awake.

“No, I’m feeling better now. I know you’ve had a long day and I’m sure you don’t want to hear about my crappy job.” You didn’t mean to sound snarky or anything but you hated piling your problems on others. Even your boyfriend.

Carmen crossed the kitchen and stood behind you, “Hey, look at me.”

You set the bowl down and turned to face him. He placed his hands on either side of your body, trapping you between him. “You know that I like hearing about your day. Good or bad. You can tell me anything.”

“I know that I can. It’s just, you have a stressful fucking job and I don’t want to add my problems to your plate. No pun intended.”

Carmen rested his forehead against yours, “I like hearing about your day. It’s- something that distracts me from the shit that I had to deal with.”

He softly kissed your lips and it was like all of your problems melted away in that moment. Being with him was like being in a bubble where nothing could go wrong. Carmy made everything better.

“Thanks, Carmy.” You whispered.

“Anytime.” He reached behind you and placed his finger in your mixing bowl getting some frosting from the side.

“Hey! No fingers in my bowl!” You laughed.

“Sorry, it looks delicious.” He started to put his finger in his mouth to taste it but you stopped him. Instead, you grabbed his hand and guided it to your mouth.

Carmen watched with a lustful gaze as you licked the frosting from his index finger.

“Mmmm. Delicious.”

“Bedroom. Now.”

You laughed, “I have to finish frosting my cake.”

Carmen stepped closer to you, “If you aren’t in that bed in one minute, I will carry you there myself.”

“Yes, Chef.”

[harrywavycurly]

Do we ask Niall to be our man of honor since Gemma is Harry’s best woman? If so I’d love to see a little something of us asking him because as snarky as Niall is I know he’d cry 😂😊😊

Hiii lovey!!! Oh 1000% Niall James Horan is the man of honor, I will happily give you how it went when you asked him! I love how in this series it’s normal to just assume everyone is always crying 😂💖

-find all things Lonely here✨

A/N: Niall doesn’t do well with surprises but this really isn’t what he was expecting, enjoy a look at how you and Niall communicate because you two are besties✨

“Why are you in such a rush?” You ignore Niall’s question as your grip on his hand tightens as you practically drag him towards the back of the restaurant, smiling at the bartender as you head towards a private room that you had spent the better half of the afternoon decorating with the help of a very huffy and puffy Harry who wanted nothing more than to enjoy his Saturday lazing about on the couch, but who was he to tell his fiancé no. “What are we doing back here? Last time you and I went through a door like this it was in Paris and we accidentally stumbled upon that sex club place and honestly I still have nightmares about what we saw so please just tell me-”

“Niall.” Your voice stops his ranting as the two of you are now standing outside the door of the private room. You give his hand a little squeeze making him look down at you, his eyes are a bit wide and he’s bitting his bottom lip so you know he’s nervous for whatever’s on the other side of the door and you want to laugh because you know what’s waiting for him but you don’t you just bring your free hand up and give his cheek a playful pat. “We swore we’d never talk about that night again didn’t we? But don’t worry there’s nothing weird behind this door. Trust me.” You watch him nod as he lets out a deep breath as you let go of his hand so you can take a small step back and let him enter the room on his own. He runs a hand through his hair and looks at you over his shoulder and when you just give him a reassuring smile he turns his attention back to the daunting black door in front of him.

“Fuck it.” You laugh as he mumbles the words as his hand grips the doorknob giving it a twist so it’ll open. You slowly follow him into the little room and you clasp your hands behind your back as you watch Niall take in the sight before him. “You’ve got to be shitting me.” His eyes are the size of golf balls as he fully steps into the room, not sure what to focus on first.

You know the surprise in his voice is genuine because while Niall Horan may be your bestfriend, when he found out you and Harry were getting married he didn’t assume he was going to be apart of it other than a guest or maybe a groomsman for Harry but that was a big maybe since everyone has always considered Niall more yours than Harry’s. So asking him to not only be in your wedding party but the Man of Honor wasn’t something he was expecting so he surly wasn’t prepared to be asked like this.

You got fancy silver balloons that spelled out “Be my Man of Honor?” And hung them on the wall above the little couch that was in the room and then got white and powder pink streamers and hung them from the ceiling framing the balloons and on the wall across from the couch you picked some of your favorite photos of the two of you throughout your decade long friendship and clipped them to some fairy lights that Harry neatly hung in nice rows while you stood off to the side and supervised. Sitting on the table in front of the couch was a basket filled with random things Niall would need to help plan wedding activities, a flask with his name engraved on it and his title, little bottles of his favorite liquor and a card that would no doubt make him cry when he reads it. But the thing that you know was going to really send him into shock was the two pints of Guinness sitting next to the basket, something you know he’d instantly take as your way of bribing him to say yes and normally he wouldn’t be wrong but this time it was just a token of your love and appreciation for him.

“Did you really think I’d be able to marry that lanky hunk of a man without the help of my bestfriend?” Niall turns to look at you from where he’s standing in the middle of the room and you feel your eyes begin to get that all too familiar sting to them when you see the look on his face. His eyes are still a little wide but glossy and his cheeks are a tiny bit pink while his bottom lip is tucked between his teeth and you know he’s doing his best not to full on lose it.

“You’re a proper asshole for this.” Is all he says before you meet him half way and he’s wrapping his arms around your shoulders bringing you into his chest for a hug. “Like really you get me all dressed up just to make me fucking cry in a back room of a pub.” You just laugh as your arms wrap around his middle, you feel him rest his chin on the top of your head and let out a sigh. “Tammy is gonna be pissed you didn’t ask her.”

“Tammy? You thought I’d ask Tammy to be my maid of honor?” You pull away from him just enough so you can look up at him with a raised brow making him just shrug as he looks down at you. “Niall she doesn’t even like Harry why would I ask her to help me plan my wedding to him?”

“I mean I don’t like him either and here I am.”

“Oh shut up you love him.”

“Yeah whatever. So what’s a man of honor do anyway? Is this a paying gig?” You can’t help but laugh and shake your head as Niall releases his hold on you so he can walk over to the table and take a look at what you put in the basket. “Is this a checklist of things I have to do? Why do I have to do so bloody much? It’s your wedding not mine.” His tone is teasing as he flips through the notebook you put in the basket that had random things in it that you found online that listed what most maid of honors did so you figured a man of honor could do them as well. “This says hold the bride’s dress while she pees? Now I love you and all but I’m not holding your dress while you pee.” He states as he looks from the notebook and over to you.

“I held your hair when you got sick at Halloween two years ago when Amelia was out of town.”

“That was a wig so it wasn’t even my actual hair.”

“So? I still held it while you got sick. So why can’t you hold my dress while I pee? It’s not like you’ll see anything you big ninny.”

“Ninny? Real mature. Does Harry know one of my jobs is watching you take a piss?”

“No but-”

“You know how weird he’s always been about people getting too close to you and that was before he went and decided to marry you. I can’t imagine he’s gonna take too kindly to seeing me follow you into the bathroom so I can assist you in taking a leak.”

“Fine I’ll have someone else assist me during my bathroom breaks you asshole.”

“I’m not an asshole I’m being a proper gentleman and not trying to get an inappropriate glimpse of my bestfriend’s lady bits on her actual fucking wedding day.” The two of you stare at each other for a moment, both of you have your hands on your hips and playful glares in your eyes but Niall is first to break as his mouth forms a grin before he starts laughing making you laugh as well.

“I love you Niall.” Your voice is soft once you finally get your laughter under control, you reach for one of his hands so you can give it a nice squeeze. “Thank you for being my man of honor.” You add making him shrug as he leans down and grabs one of the pints of Guinness off the table with his free hand.

“I love you too and you’re welcome because it says here I get to plan your bachelorette party so you’re in for a world of fun love.” You roll your eyes when he shoots you a wink before he brings the pint up to his lips to take a good long swig. “I’m thinking strippers and a round of golf. How’s that sound?”

“Horrible.”

[season-77]

My rather late contribution to Snarky Little Shit Saturday, here it is for you all:

the 'What a load of bloody nonsense' eyebrow

[cyripticchronicler]

Ink and Destiny - Part 2

The long-awaited date with James arrives, and you see him in a new light. But wouldn't it be crazy, to fall for your soulmate?

Masterlist

Part one Part Three Part Four

Warnings: Kissing, swearing, I think that's it if not lmk :)

A/N: Thank you for requesting a part two @lilianelena39I appreciate it sm!!

It seems as if Saturday was never going to come. Which was both a blessing and torture. You were excited to finally get to know your soulmate. But James Potter? The boy who’s been pining after Lily for years? Not to mention all the cruel pranks he’s played on people around school. So, obviously, you were a little hesitant to get to know him. 

You’ve been talking all week, never in person but rather on your skin. You’ve pointedly ignored his flirty comments whilst he pointedly ignored all my snarky comments. 

But alas, Saturday arrived. It took everything in you to get up and ready, already dreading the day ahead. But you still promised to go on that date, and you weren't going to let your crippling disgust of awkward first dates and small talk ruin your chances of getting to know your soulmate. 

So here you were, dressed in your prettiest dress as you made your way towards the lake. The sun's heat grounds you and you push your nerves to the side, taking in the shimmering lake instead. 

James told you to bring nothing, insisting that he’ll handle everything instead. You were flattered but now your hands are empty and you don’t know what to do with them. 

He’s not even here yet. Relax. 

You made sure you got here earlier so you could mentally prepare yourself. But the extra time did nothing for you when you spot James making his way towards you, grinning devilishly, picnic basket in one hand and a wrapped gift in the other. 

You smile tightly as he stops in front of you and he gives you a knowing smirk, “Miss me?” He asks and you scoff. 

“Need any help?” You ignore him, gesturing to the basket in his hand. 

He shakes his head, “No thank you, Love. Let’s move up the lake a bit.” You nod, walking beside him. The silence is awkward- for you at least- so you quickly come up with something to say. 

“How was your day?” You ask, eyes looking everywhere but him. 

“Better now that you’re here,” He grins, sending you a playful wink. You roll your eyes, stopping underneath a big tree. James deems the spot good enough and he gently places the wrapped gift and basket down. 

He pulls out a blanket and sets it down on the grass. He sits and you follow suit, making sure to keep a good distance between the two of you. 

“If a bird shits on me I’m blaming you,” You blurt, immediately wincing. Who says that? 

James just laughs, eyes playful, “I’ll try to keep the birds away from you then.” Your cheeks flush making his grin widen. 

He starts pulling everything out of the basket and you take notice of the way he brought all of your favourite food. 

Noticing your confused stare, his cheeks flush a deep red. “I may have asked Alice what food you liked.” He mutters sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. 

You melt, “That's very thoughtful. Thank you, James.” He blushes more and you have to bite back a smile. “How’s Quidditch going?” You ask, deciding to change the subject before James burns from embarrassment. 

He perks up immediately, “Really good, actually, we’ve started practising-” You try hard, really hard to focus on what he’s saying but the way he’s sitting, and the way he looks at you makes it hard to focus. 

You’re not sure what’s gotten into you. Just yesterday you were thinking about how much you don’t like him. 

“-listening?” You jump as you realise he just asked you a question. 

“Hm?” You flush, trying to act as if you werent checking him out. James sends you a knowing smile, “I asked if you wanted some butterbeer. You seem distracted, what’s on your mind?” 

You flush, “Y-yes, please. I‘m not distracted.” 

He hums like he knows you’re lying, “Cracker?” You nod. “Do you have any plans for Christmas ?” 

“No,” You respond, “My parents are travelling so they won’t be home for Christmas. Do you?”

You munch on food as he responds, “Sirius is coming home with me for Christmas but I’ll make sure to send you letters so you don’t miss me too much,” He winks and you scoff, “I won’t miss you at all, James Potter.”

He leans in closer, “Just you wait.” 

You don’t miss the way he looks at your lips, and you’re sure he doesn't miss the way you stare back at him. 

Clearing your throat, you attempt to deflect, “So you’re finally over Lily?” James freezes, finally looking back at you. 

“I was barely into her,” He responds cautiously like he doesn’t know where this conversation is going to go.

“Ask anyone in the school and they’d say that’s a lie,” You respond, chewing on a grape nervously. 

“Well, it’s not. I promise you,” When you don’t respond he sighs, “I got you a gift.” You perk up slightly, tracking his movements as he pushes the gift towards you. 

“I didn’t get you anything,” You say guiltily and he smirks in response, “That's the point.”

You roll your eyes, muttering a ‘thank you’ before ripping open the present. You gasp at the contents. “How did you know this was my favourite book?” You question, eagerly inspecting the frayed book. “And it’s signed?!” You screech. 

James laughs gently, “I have my ways. So, do you like it?”

“Do I like it? James this is amazing thank you,” You don’t think to question your actions as you fling your arms around his neck, causing him to fall forward as you pull him closer. His laugh is like honey as he returns the hug, cheeks flushed slightly. 

“I’m glad you like it. Maybe you could read it to me sometime? On our second date.” He pulls away slightly, hands holding himself up beside your head. 

“Our second date, Huh?” You grip his wrist gently, running your hand up his arm. 

“Yeah. The date where I prove to you that I have no feelings for Lily and where you read to me.”

“You know just because we’re soulmates doesn't mean we have to be together,” You’re not sure why you say it but you do. James' eyes soften like he can see in between the lines. “I’m not doing this because you’re my soulmate, I’m doing this because I like you.”

You suck in a deep breath, “Oh.”

He smiles in return, “Yeah, Oh.”

You act on impulse, pushing yourself up slightly to plant a quick peck on his lips. His grin widens and your cheeks explode. 

His eyebrows raise smugly, “So is that a yes to the second date?”

You nod shyly and he giggles- like actually giggles- and shoves his head in the crook of your neck. “It’s going to be the best second date you’ve ever been on,” He mutters against your skin 

You find yourself growing excited at the thought of a second date with James, and you bite your lip to stop your smile from growing. 

“I can’t wait,” You whisper. 

“Me too,” He whispers back.

[thisapplepielife]

Written for the @steddieholidaydrabbles December challenge.

You Say Bark, I Say Bite

Prompt Day 1: Open Mic Night | Word Count: 1000 | Rating: T | CW: Language, Smoking | Tags: Pre-S4, Pre-Steddie, Platonic Stobin, Corroded Coffin

"No, no, no," Steve says, waving his hand in front of him. He's not doing this. 

"Steve, please," Robin begs, "it's just one night. For me. You love me." 

There are so many other ways they could spend a Saturday night that don't involve listening to shitty musicians. They'll all suck. He knows that. They've done this before, and he's never heard anything he's liked. 

"Steve. For me," she pleads, giving him the eyes. 

He sighs. He was always going, but he's not happy about it. And he wants Robin to know that. 

"Tammy Thompson sounds like a Muppet," Steve says.

"You've said," Robin mumbles, annoyed. 

That's the whole reason they're here in Indianapolis tonight, at some under twenty-one club, listening to teens and college kids play shitty music. To hear Tammy Thompson nasal her way through a song or two.

Someone brought a goddamn flute. To an open mic night. A flute. These people are all weirdos. No talent to be found.

Then the little stage is suddenly bustling with movement, bringing in actual instruments and equipment. Okay, maybe they're getting somewhere. This has to be better than another douchebag with a guitar.

Oh, no. 

That's definitely a douchebag with a guitar.

"Is that…Eddie Munson?" Steve asks, cutting Robin a look. 

"Well, duh," Robin says, totally unbothered by this very weird turn of events, "he has a band, you know that."

He knows that? He doesn't know that. He knows Eddie Munson is a dealer. He knows Eddie Munson is a freak. But he didn't know Eddie Munson played the guitar.

"I didn't fucking know that," Steve says, confused, wrinkling his forehead.

"They play at The Hideout every week. Eddie, Jeff, Gareth and Goodie. Corroded Coffin. You know that. Everybody knows that. Eddie is always hanging up flyers everywhere."

News to him. He doesn't know any of these guys. Who the fuck is Goodie? That's not even a name.

"I think you're making shit up. I don't recognize any of those guys. Like, not at all. Did they go to Hawkins? While I was there?"

Robin looks at him like he's an asshole. Okay, they must have. 

"They gotta be way younger," Steve finally says, indignant. "I know Eddie. Because he's been a senior for the last five years."

She gives him a withering look, "Three years. Last three years."

Like that's better. 

Eddie is quietly helping the drummer get his shit set up as fast as they can, and Steve watches. This should be good. This will be way more entertaining than Tammy Thompson. Because he can't fathom what Eddie Munson might think is good music. God, Steve hopes he tries to sing. 

He's positive this will be worth the cover charge, for sure. A trainwreck.

It's not a trainwreck. Eddie Munson falls back, and the black kid takes the mic. Okay, he didn't expect that. He expected Munson to be front and center.

"Who's the singer?" 

"Jeff Williams. His sister was in your class," Robin hisses. 

Oh, okay. Molly Williams was fun. She wouldn't give him the time of day when he tried to get her to go on a date with him, but fun. He didn't even know she had a little brother.

They start playing a song, and Steve doesn't recognize it.

Jeff shouts, "All aboard!" and laughs as the drummer starts clicking his sticks together, then playing, and it's okay. Fine. 

Then, Eddie starts playing the guitar. 

Goddammit. 

Steve hates to be wrong, and hates that this is really working for him. Eddie Munson looks at ease, happy, and kinda hot. Steve's never seen him look like that at school. Not once. Munson is snarky, snappy. Always quick to bite back. Funny, for sure, but Steve would avoid him, because Munson never shied away from trying to make Steve look stupid at every fucking turn. 

But he can play the guitar, apparently.

Robin nudges his shoulder, "They're good, right?"

He nods, not looking away. They're good.

They play another heavy song, but it's Queen. They're doing a metal cover of Bicycle Race, and that amuses Steve, he likes Queen.

After they're done playing, Steve makes excuses, and slips outside into the alley. He's pretty sure Eddie Munson isn't going to stay to watch this other shit.

Eventually, there he is, guitar case in hand. Steve thinks he'd like to ride him like a bicycle, and that's a new thought.

About Eddie. Not about men. 

"Oh, hey," Steve says, leaning against the wall of the alley, smoking a cigarette he bummed. Robin will kill him, but he needs an excuse to be out here. Like he wasn't waiting. Even if he totally was.

"Harrington," Eddie says with contempt, "what brings you out here with us freaks?"

"Robin," Steve says, and Eddie gives him a look.

"Buckley's really friends with you? I thought that was a terrible rumor."

Steve pretends that doesn't hurt, and just nods.

"Too bad, I like her," Eddie says, and this was a mistake. What the fuck was he thinking? Eddie Munson will just give him a tongue-lashing, and not in a fun way. He's an idiot for thinking otherwise. Steve isn't this hard up. 

"Okay, well, you guys looked good," Steve says, pushing himself off the wall. 

Eddie laughs, incredulous, "You thought we looked good?" 

"Sounded," Steve corrects. 

"You, King Steve, thought we sounded good? I've been to your house parties. You don't listen to metal. Do you even know who Ozzy is?"

Steve doesn't, and shakes his head. And Eddie's been to his house? Since when? Nevermind. Doesn't matter.

"You guys were good compared to all that other shit I had to sit through tonight. You sounded like, you know, actual music. I guess." 

Eddie raises an eyebrow, like he can see right through Steve. 

Shit. 

Shit, shit, shit.

Steve suddenly feels like he's in big trouble. Trapped. Backed into a corner.

Eddie smiles and takes a step towards him, and it's predatory.

Steve swallows.

Oh, he's definitely in trouble.

If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, head on over to @steddieholidaydrabbles and follow along with the fun! 🎤

If you want to see more of my entries into this month-long challenge, you can check them out in my tag, right here!

[sexy-opium-ravioli]

Photo Booth

Universe: Resident Evil

wc: 1,791

Pairing: Stepbro!Leon S. Kennedy x Reader

Warnings: Not many, just the fact that Leon is your stepbrother and he is .5 of a little shit. Otherwise, this is a good, old fashioned fluff piece.

a/n: Hihi hello hello :) I've been trying to claw my way out of depression for a while, but here's some cute Leon content in the meantime!

@lipglossanon !! thank you for being such a wonderful writer, honestly reading you has been really inspiring as of late! and your characterization of the Leons you have are among my very favorite.

It not my best work by any means, but I hope anyone reading this enjoys <3

--

The liminal space of a mall was the place where you could see through a person, like light through glass. You'd get to see what stores they prefer to go to, what mall food they like to eat (or if they can't), what they buy vs what they don't. 

Or sometimes, as is the case with you and your weird, pseudo-freudian stepbrother-boyfriend Leon, you just get boba and mess around. 

There were other things you'd like to do with him, sure. Sometimes you two would catch a movie- or fuck each other until you're both sensitive and whimpering (as young lovers often do). Really depended on the day. 

But it was earlier in the morning and it was a free, clear Saturday, in the haze of a temperate spring. And, the last couple of days were kind of stressful. Keeping up separate social lives, exams, dealing with your shared parents- sometimes just being apart from each other was okay.

You were starting to suspect something in Leon. You didn't know what it was, really. Everything was in a haze with him- truer emotions he always hid behind something snarky and barbed. And since you could never really get an accurate read on him, you could only try to squint in the dark and decipher the signs in front of you. 

Still, something foundational was shifting. And there was a strange feeling in your stomach that had been there all morning, and it wasn't bad, per se; but it was constant and unusual. You sipped on your boba and started chewing. 

You and Leon were both sitting on public benches. The time was before most of the retail shops started setting up, only the food court was open. You laid your head on Leon's shoulder and closed your eyes while you both soaked in the sun's warmth. 

The mall was bright and quiet, not many were there yet. You still felt a bit sleepy, but it didn't seem like Leon minded resting either. There was a difference in the emotions you feel someone going through when you rest your head on their shoulder- and the way Leon's was giving into the weight of your head spelled relaxation. The both of you spent a bit of your morning like this. You lifted your head and glanced at how the sunlight reflected off of Leon's golden hair. How it also cut a shadow at the curve of his jaw. 

"You wanna walk around?" You asked with your voice low, not wanting to disrupt the quiet, alive whirring of the building. Leon looked at you, smiled a bit and nodded his head before getting up. 

When you caught up to pace with him, you decided to annoy him and cross pinkies. He retaliated by taking hold of your entire hand, and you tried not to make a big deal about it. Your heart was starting to beat really fast, though. 

You thought he would let go after a couple of seconds. He didn't. 

Exiting the first floor common area to the escalators surrounding it, you both enjoyed the warmth of a second floor perch. Leon hasn't let go of your hand yet, but you were joking around about other people you were seeing at the mall, or the vaguely strange sale ads you'd see posted on windows. 

It was light, conversation felt easy for once.

And then Leon saw something, and you watched the way his eyes captured a glint of absolute mischief. 

Your eyes followed the laser point focus of his- and oh. 

Oh. 

A photo booth. 

And before you knew it, the distance between you and the box was already halved from Leon practically yanking your arm off. It didn't hurt, so all you could do was laugh. 

Walking up to it, Leon already got his wallet out and was feeding the machine bills. You decided to slip in and look around inside. All photo booths look different- this one was pretty new and sparkly. 

Not long after, Leon swept the curtains and stepped in with a mean smirk. You got yourself ready, trying to make yourself look alright while Leon selected to start through the menu. 

You always felt a weird sort of anxiety in photo booths. They never gave anybody enough time to actually prepare for a photo, but Leon was already doing someth- "Hey-!"

He quickly stepped behind you, caged you in his arms, gave two hand horns, and made such a twisted face he actually did kind of resemble the devil, because in his heart of hearts, Leon S. Kennedy was a dork. 

You decided that if he was going to suffocate you with all the muscle he was trying to show off, you were going to get a picture of biting it. 

The bite wasn't too hard, but the quick noise that Leon gave was mostly out of being startled anyways. He quickly retaliated by flicking your arm before posing for the next- 

"Let's do a nicer one," you interject, quietly and quickly. You both prepare and in time, you're smiling together while Leon has his arm draped over your shoulders. It all happened so quickly and concisely that the warm feeling you got in your stomach from all the affectionate, silly, friendly contact was delayed. 

The countdown started again. Leon almost shoved you in front of him, but instead of putting his arms over your chest and neck and face, (being annoying about it), he placed them gently over your waist. And then when the camera flashed, he was kissing your cheek. 

You turned around in his arms, not really caring about the photos anymore. But he was the one that leaned down and kissed you gingerly, and with meaning. His lips were always so soft and smooth against yours-

The camera flashed. You two were together a little longer, and then you both separated. It was a few long seconds where time just stopped, and you could swear that if you opened the curtain and tried to find one of the rare morning pedestrians of the mall, they would be left unmoving. 

But all you could do was look at Leon. It didn't help that he was so pretty. But there was this weird flash of emotion in his eyes, that same one you couldn't read and he wasn't looking away-

The camera flash made you both jump a little, and then Leon gave a quiet, nervous laugh to himself that sparked yours. He looked at you again, an upward pull of his lips that didn't seem too mean anymore. "Better get those photos," 

"Yeah," you offer back, already leaving the booth. He followed you, and not long after, the booth started to give out a noise before producing two copies of the same strip. Leon quickly snatched them before you could even hope to grab them, and he held them out of your view after that. 

"Leon," He was snickering. That pretty smile he hasn't dropped for 5 minutes now has had its teasing quality reapplied. Irritation quickly bubbles back up in your throat. 

"Ugh, Leon, you-" He does that little shit older brother thing where he lets the strip creep just into your reach before yanking it away a couple of times, but he doesn't do it too much. He gives you one of the copies after starting to giggle at you. 

You shake your head, ready to be embarrassed at your own face or maybe even his, and- well, the first photo has you laughing. Your head is tilted backward and your eyes are closed, and the laughs pour out of your throat like smooth wine. 

"Leon you're such a dork,-"

"Oh ok! And we're not gonna talk about the absolutely feral thing latching itself to my arm-," 

"Noo~, we're not," You interrupt teasingly, and you take a look back at the pictures. The air swiftly changes from playful, easy and teasing to meaningful, endearing- kind of tense in a way. Leon looked beautiful, and you looked nice too, and now you just noticed that Leon is right behind you actively gauging your reaction. 

The third photo was almost too sweet and intimate to look at publicly, and you could feel the tips of your ears start to heat up. Leon's face is mostly obscured, sure, but the way you react to why it's obscured is so sweet and genuine it kind of embarrasses you. Your lips try to hide a smile and your eyes are cast downward and away from Leon- low, but not closed. One of your arms rests on the lean coils of muscle wrapped around your center, while the other reaches up for your hand to rest on his head. 

The fourth makes you inhale a little sharper, and you can now feel the high part of your cheekbones heat with your ears. Leon's chin is resting on your shoulder now, and you can't even imagine the shit-eating grin he must be wearing on his face. Well, both of your faces can't be seen by the camera, if that's any consolation to your poor, heated skin- you might melt ice at this point. 

You don't know why it has you so weirdly dizzy, but maybe it's the way Leon looks so boyish, almost soft kissing you. His head is so slightly tilted, and the way his body curls around yours is just so engaged-

The fifth one is sweet in a different way. It makes your heart instantly crackle and spark for hope, which any sort of tired rationality your dopamine abused brain has left is probably screaming at. 

There's that fear in your chest, but there's no denying the fact that there's a light glimmering in Leon's sea glass eyes that you haven't seen from him too many times. 

It's a look that makes your entire body feel warm, like your skin is being pricked by needles. At this point, you've stopped looking at the photos altogether and buried your face in your hands. It makes Leon's chin lift off your shoulder, and you hear a chuckle come from him, but nothing sarcastic. 

"C'mon, stores are opening soon, weirdo," And when he says that you realize that there's warmth behind his words. You lift your head and look at him, and he's scratching his nose but- is he blushing too? Oh. 

Oh. 

He is. 

Probably not as scorching hot as you, but still. He starts walking, you start walking with him. And then, he takes your hand like that entire thing just didn't happen, and you find that you can't really stop smiling. Even if you reduce it to the smallest pull of your lips, it's still on your face for a while longer. 

--

[jessieren]

Snarky little shit Saturday- late edition

The snark factor around George Fancy was particularly strong

[babybreadddd]

sorry no cure

characters: hyunjin x f!reader, established relationship

summary: (for u to find out!)

warnings: angst, cursing, arguing

a/n: its my first short fic, i hope you like it! ending is up to your interpretation, might do a pt2 ?

wc: 1.2k

in reality hyunjin isn't like this!!!! they are all cute, nice and friendly!! this is not the actual character of hyune!!

nothing was going your way. your heartless boss just dumped paperwork on you - on a weekend and demanded it to be done by monday. he took advantage of your willingness, your eager-to-please personality to make you do his dirty work. and at what expense? 

you suffering, toiling on a saturday, one where you should be enjoying your day at home with hyunjin. 

well, there was no point stopping your work. hyunjin wasn't home. he was out, going to a dance class. 

i have to finish this quick, then wash up and clean the house... then i have to go grocery shopping, and maybe pay my sick dad a visit? if i finish my work, maybe i could get a quick treat. like, some acai? 

oh, wait. you can't. money's tight, and well, acai is expensive. right. 

you sighed internally. all you could do as you trudged through your work was to hope that hyunjin would come home in a good mood and comfort you, and what you could do now, was just to keep your mood from spiraling. too many worries spinning around. you couldn't keep this up for much longer. 

hours passed quickly. with each passing hour, bottles upon bottles of caffeine were downed, your mind becoming a hazy mess as you mindlessly do your work. 

you can't take it anymore. you detach yourself from your work and let your body slump on your chair. your eyes hurt, so you close them and leave your mind wandering. 

screw your boss who doesn't respect your boundaries. screw you, who doesn't have enough guts to stand up for yourself and say no. you brought this suffering upon yourself, and now you're facing the consequences of your actions. 

none of this could have happened if you said no. it's not like you would be fired if you said no. just accept reality - you're a people pleaser, and you're so easily manipulated by people. in all honesty, doing someone else's work isn't pleasant, but you feel validated. you live for the commendation, the acknowledgement, the applause. no matter how bad it feels, as long as someone validates you - that you've worked hard, you're someone, someone kind and loveable - that's all you care about. 

and seeking that feeling, that validation has led you to this hell of a mess. it's all my fault right? you need to stop seeking validation, and just do your work well, and not overwork yourself. sounds simple enough? 

the creak of the door opening sends you out of your trance. you see hyunjin, mustering a slight smile at the sight of you. he's definitely tired and exhausted. 

you're still deep in your emotions, but you manage to get out a small "hi baby. how are you?"

"fine. did you get my art supplies?"

shit. his art supplies….you were too absorbed in doing your work that you forgot about it. 

well, he's gonna get mad at you and then there goes your whole day. you can imagine it in your brain - work, arguments, maybe even sleeping in separate rooms? fighting with hyunjin over the smallest things often progressed to long, cold days of isolation where no exchanges would take place, and each would ignore the other, until one of you finally gave in. 

no. i can't let that happen. it was painful for both of us last time, it hurt both of us. 

you swallow your pride and mumble out a "sorry."

"sorry no cure, y/n."

you gasped internally. yes, hyunjin could be a little snarky during arguments, but that- wasn't that crossing a line? you always promised each other that no matter what, sorrys were the way to fix arguments, no matter how many apologies it took. 

the word "sorry" in an argument meant so much. it meant putting your pride down, telling yourself you were wrong and that you'd do something to make amends.

the fact that he'd rejected a "sorry"? it's just paint supplies, it's not even something as important as missing a date! besides, he only does painting in his free time, and he barely spends time with me, what more painting? 

"if sorry isn't a cure, then i'm not sorry for not getting you your painting supplies. get it yourself if it's so important." your emotions exploded. you were tired and irritable, and now you had to argue with the stubborn hyunjin? nevertheless, it hurt you so much to spit those venomous words out at him, but how could you break in front of his snarky comments? never.

an expression appears on his face, but it disappears quickly. you're not sure what it is, but you could pinpoint it to be something of horror and shock. 

i've done some horrible damage this time.. i'm going to pay for it sooner or later. in fights like this, the worse thing you've done is to say some sharp words, give him the cold treatment and wait for a while before someone gives in and you both will be good. but this time, you're not too sure. 

your pride, just put down a few seconds ago, begins to rise. you give him one more jab, scoffing lightly, "go get them now. you'll come back to a nice and quiet house with no one to quarrel with you. you like that? of course you do. i bet you hate me because i've failed you so many times." 

that was the breaking point for hyunjin. he stepped closer to you, your gaze meeting his. your instinct was to flinch and take a step back, but for the sake of your pride, you didn't. instead, you stared right back into his eyes, emotionless. 

before you knew it, you felt your composure cracking as you stared cold and hard into his brown eyes, each willing the other to break. you felt yourself breaking under his glare. exasperated, you sent him a death stare before you took your phone and keys, and muttered a quick "i need space" and left your shared home. you desperately wanted to take back your sharp words that plunged a knife straight to his heart, but how could you? you can't. 

in arguments like this, you can't just turn back. you swallowed your pride to say sorry, and he rejects your apology? real nice of him.  

and that's how you left him. you might've felt a little better if he had begged you to stay, but you knew he didn't want to give you the satisfaction of knowing he wouldn't want you to leave, that he still loves you, and he's sorry. that's hyunjin though. 

4 sentences exchanged and that caused a fracture in your relationship with him. all you wanted when he came home was to give you comforting hugs and cuddles to soothe you from the stress of your work. and you'd do the same too, and you both would have a cozy day together. turns out fate had other plans for you. 

you won't be coming back to this apartment for a while. you've plunged the knife in, turned and twisted it and there was probably nothing you could do to patch his broken heart back up. besides, you'd need to wait for him to cave first. 

unknown to you, he was already working out a plan to get you back. you'd hate it, but it'll bring you back to him. 

don't copy my work/post on other platforms! thanku :))) reblogs are appreciated and thanks for reading!

[librawritesstuff]

Snarky Little Shit Saturday: ThrowWayWayBack Edition (Teachers 2002)

(Wait for his reaction at the end)

[jo-harrington]

Corroded Coffin Fest - Day 6 - Heard It In a Love Song

Summary: Let's talk about the real Casanova of Corroded Coffin...

Word Count: 979

Rating: T

Pairings: Dave/Tina, briefly alluded Eddie/OC (The Knight from As Above, So Below)

Warnings/Themes: Unrequited Feelings, Confessions, Mutual Pining, Song Fic (Somethin' Stupid by Frank Sinatra), set the same night as Werewolf but you don't need to read that.

Note: I figured that since Saturdays of CCFest are sort of...love themed I would tie them into some of my existing stories. Don't know how well that will hold up as we continue but...fuck it, let's go.

Check Out the Main Post for @corrodedcoffinfest here! Even if you didn’t start on Day 1, you can still join!

Tagging: @the-unforgivenn at her request.

You can find my masterlist here.

Please do not interact if you are not 18+.

Enjoy!

I know I stand in line Until you think you have the time To spend an evening with me

Dave hated parties.

They'd just never been his scene.

The music was always bad, the food even worse, they were crowded, hot, and uncomfortable.

His pet peeve? He’d actually enjoy the party—dancing, talking to some people—and someone would start making out right next to him. Full on tonsil hockey.

Tonight was unimaginably awful; he was amidst a sea of hormonal, drunk teenagers and he had to sit there and watch his crush play hostess all night.

Christina Clyne. Tina.

The most beautiful girl in school.

Dave was pretty sure that she didn't know he existed, even though they were lab partners. Mainly because she never looked at him.

And if we go some place to dance I know that there's a chance You won't be leaving with me

She'd been flitting about all night, putting out snacks and yelling when people spilled their drink.

She greeted them all when they arrived, desperately thanking Eddie for bringing the weed. And even though she even made snarky remark about Eddie having a girlfriend, she was still pretty welcoming to the freaks.

"Guess if Halloween belonged to anyone it would be you guys," she laughed and waved them towards the patio. "If you wanna set up outside. There's a keg out there, and then snacks in the kitchen. Help yourselves."

Before she disappeared, she smiled nervously at Dave.

His heart stopped in his chest; he figured that he'd just been staring creepily the whole time.

Because that had to be it.

He'd gone steady with people before and they’d been cute.

But Tina? She was completely out of his league.

Surely she had a boyfriend hanging around somewhere. One of Tommy Hagan's douchebag friends? Or that Hargrove guy that had everyone swooning?

She was being polite; she couldn't actually be smiling at him.

Then afterwards we drop into a quiet little place And have a drink or two

As the night went on, he found the the party wasn't all that bad.

Yeah, there were kids making out in the living room, and Jeff had disappeared a while ago. Eddie and his girlfriend stayed outside making fun of people's costumes.

But Dave was determined to have a good time.

He didn’t want to just mope around, especially when Tina was always nearby.

So he'd played beer pong, danced with Nancy Wheeler of all people, and drank spiked punch until he felt a little dizzy.

And that's how he ended up in Tina's bedroom.

"Oh shit," he muttered as he swung the door open to find a frilly, pink-painted bedroom instead of a toilet and sink. But his thoughts came into focus when he realized that Tina was sitting on the bed, tears silently dripping down her cheeks. "You ok?"

She startled at the sound of his voice and quickly made to wipe them away.

"Yeah, don't worry about it," she tried to laugh it off. "Did you need help finding anything Dave?"

His was dumbfounded; she knew his name?

"Uh, I was...looking for the bathroom," he explained but hesitated. "You sure you're ok?"

"Yeah, I was just," she stopped herself. "It's silly."

"It isn't silly if it upset you. I get upset about things all the time. It always makes me feel better to tell someone."

"R-really?" she sniffed and he nodded. "Alright."

They shared a smile and she patted the spot next to her.

And then I go and spoil it all

“Alright, what’s the hubbub bub?” He asked, channeling some of the smooth lingo Eddie used.

It earned him the softest giggle that made him feel like he was gonna melt.

“Like I said, it’s silly,” she sniffled again, looking directly into his eyes. “But…I saw my crush dancing with someone else.”

He felt his heart shatter, “o-oh?”

“I’d been trying to give him hints all night, made sure I was always around…but it wasn’t enough.”

He reached down and picked at the blanket on the bed, “I, uh, I don’t know guys are kinda stupid.”

She giggled again, and he closed his eyes to harden his heart.

“Sometimes,” he cleared his throat, “you have to just walk up to them and tell them ‘hey, I like you.’”

“Seriously?! That sounds like a recipe for disaster.”

And he wished he could be that guy who gave bad advice on purpose, who made Tina look like an idiot because if he couldn’t be with her, then no one should.

But he wasn’t that kind of guy.

“No if you really like them, you should just tell them,”

“Alright.” She gently set her hand on his. “Davey? I…I really like you.”

By saying somethin' stupid like, "I love you"

His head shot back up so he could look at her again for any kind of joke or mockery, but there was only softness and sincerity.

It didn’t make sense…she was talking about him?

When? Who? What?!

He went over the whole night in his head and yeah, every time he found someplace to hang out she was there. And maybe she’d been around when he had danced with Nancy...had she been watching him?

Tina’s hand started to pull away from his.

"This is so stupid," she backtracked. "I'm sorry Da-"

"No!" he shouted at her. She stared at him in wide-eyed shock. He lowered his voice and then turned his hand over to grab hers. "No, it's ok. I, uh, I guess I give really good advice...because I didn't even know...and, uh, I really like you too Tina."

The moment was soft and perfect. Birds were chirping, fireworks going off, soft love hearts appear around her face. He could feel ever very deity devoted to love approval.

And it was the single greatest moment of his life.

"You wanna fool around?"

"Fuck yeah."

[showtoonzfan]

Would you say HB is portraying gays like they can do wrong and are perfect? Because every happy/good character/relationship is gay and every character that isn’t implied to be lgbt is pure evil and any m/f pairings imply that one or both of the people involved is at least bi.

Viv definitely prides herself in creating characters who are LGBTQ+ and unapologetically problematic, but if you know her work that’s the exact OPPOSITE of what she’s accomplished. She sees any of her gay characters as uwu babies who did nothing wrong, so yeah I would say that HB is portraying gays as innocent. This is why so many people make posts begging creators to craft gay characters who are nasty little shits because we’re so used to queer media portraying them as soft or pure. And I’m 100% on that boat, gimme some LGBTQ+ evil villains or bad eggs!!

Viv TRIES to get this done by making Angel a mobster who kills people, Blitz an assassin, Stolas a problematic weirdo ect, but despite their character flaws it’s pretty obvious that she wants you to think they’re good and gentle people deep down, that’s why she crafts Saturday morning cartoon villains against them so they look worse in comparison and you’ll have no choice but to side with the one who “isn’t that bad”. Val is a r@pist and Stella is an abuser so I guess that means the characters that murder people are better than them. Angel and Blitz are the worst case since they’re both murders and yet Viv portrays them as helpless and lord knows what she’ll do to Alastor. It’s been obvious from the beginning but Viv just wants her audience to see these characters the same way she does, soft and gentle uwu boys who are traumatized and just need love. I’d say that Val is the only exception since I doubt he’s straight but he doesn’t count since he’s boringly flat and his mere existence is just to make Angel look better in comparison. Vox seems to be the legit only gay character that’s evil and unapologetic but that’s not saying much since we don’t know the guy yet.

I’ve said it a million times but for the love of god she needs to stop being afraid of what her audience will think of these characters and just LET them be bad people and make mistakes WITHOUT it being excused or justified. I’d say that part of her is worried people will think she’s portraying gay people badly which……people already think that lol but in a sense that she’s painting them in a negative light. It’s an issue that some writers go through, they don’t want to give their audiences the wrong intention when it comes to their characters, remember when people disliked Angel because they thought he was in hell for being gay? It’s like that. I’d say you can accomplish this well if you play your cards right as a writer, but Viv unfortunately doesn’t have that skill. She’s under the impression that she needs to make all her gay mlm characters uwu babies while also slapping the same “snarky crude” juvenile personality onto them over and OVER again and it’s just…sickening to watch lol.