#smash. in the face. with a frying pan.

[bg3smash-or-pass]

[alcohol-man]

I am an ugly pug dog son Javert truther.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

Been thinking about this one for a bit

Mini Headcannon

How would the M6 react to someone breaking into the shop WHILE M6 and Mc are inside? Like it’s late at night and then all of sudden they hear a window smash and voices coming from downstairs or whatever goes on during a burglary/robbery. How would they react?

- 🃏

( I love when I seen people leave I little emojis so I wanted to do it too )

The Arcana Mini-HCs: When someone breaks into the shop

Julian: ever the reckless one, dashing downstairs with 1 (one) random clothing article to whip in the face of whoever intruded and no plan

Asra: asking Faust to keep an eye on the intruder for them while they concoct a Home Alone-style prank gauntlet to subject them to

Nadia: drawing a sword, leading the way downstairs trusting you to be her backup as she bests them in combat and takes their names

Muriel: heading for the nearest window. except your safety is at stake, so you two can just hide together. Inanna scares them off

Portia: sneaks up with a frying pan, but ends up eavesdropping on their conversation. blackmails them into submission with it

Lucio: the intruder can hear his infuriated squawking from upstairs. between that and the dog's growling they take off quickly

[fragileruns]

floating lights | steve harrington

a/n: sorry if this super sucks!!! it’s not proofread and i just wrote it on a whim because i finally got motivation back. i know you guys voted for henderson!reader so i promise to try and make a little thing with that but i just had so much inspo for this. also sorry this is so long for barely anything to happen but!!! i hope you enjoy anyway and follow along for the rest of the series :) i might make the next chapters longer but i don’t want them to be too long incase you guys get bored so??? lmk what you prefer

content warnings: based off ‘tangled’ so technically hostage/kidnapping situation but it’s not really directly described as that, cursing, hitting with a frying pan ??, reader has long hair

wc: 1200

Being locked in a tower for eighteen years of your life certainly stunted your learning, in some ways. Not in academics, necessarily, but more so, it kept you from understanding what the appropriate response was in certain situations. You didn’t know how normal people reacted to a stranger climbing up the walls of their doorless towers, especially handsome strangers.

Probably, they would call the police. Putting that much effort into making it inside (as the tower was quite tall, your mother only being able to make her way in and out with your help) had to be a bad sign. But you didn’t have a phone or any way to contact anyone unless you dropped down and ran for dear life, and you didn’t have any weapons on hand to defend yourself, really.

So instead of reacting like a normal person one, like someone who’s mother wasn’t so overbearing they never let you leave home, you grabbed a frying pan and smashed it as hard as you could on the stranger’s head. The strength had knocked him out, which at least kept you safe. But you didn’t really know what to do now. Tie him to a chair, maybe? It would keep him from being able to harm you, at least. That was the main goal here.

And so, that was what you did. You stared at the man now in the chair, trying to wonder why such a pretty man would be coming inside your tower. He was too young to be a friend of your mother, he was probably your age, maybe a year older. His brown hair was falling in front of his face now that his head hung over, unconscious and not controlling his movements. Your eyes landed on the satchel crossed over his body, and you carefully removed it off of him to look inside, hoping to find more clues.

A glittering tiara sat inside, shiny and bright and extremely pretty. You pulled it out, handling it with as much delicacy as you could. The temptation to put it on was almost too much, but you heard grunting as soon as you started to hold it over your head, so you shoved it back in the satchel and kicked the satchel behind a nearby chair before turning back to your captive.

“Jesus, what the hell?” The stranger grumbled, eyes slowly opening. He struggled against your hair (which had been the only thing around you could think of to use to keep him from moving), presumably trying to bring a hand up to rub the sore spot on his head, and instantly panicked when he realized he couldn’t move. “What - did you tie me up?” He questioned, glancing down. “With… hair?”

“Who are you? What are you doing in my tower?”

“Could you answer my question first? Who the hell ties someone up with hair?” He huffed, glancing up at you, hair falling back into perfect place even after being knocked out.

“Me. Who are you, and what are you doing here?” You grabbed the frying pan again, holding it up in hopes that he was threatened enough to tell you what you wanted to know.

“Uh, my name’s Steve. Harrington. Could we put the frying pan down, maybe? Please?” He glanced back down for a second, noticing the missing satchel around his waist. “Did you take my satchel? Where is it?”

“I hid it. You won’t be able to find it.”

He glanced around the room, before his eyes caught on something gleaming behind the chair. A slow smile spread on his face, and he couldn’t help but chuckle. “Behind the chair?”

“No. I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I can see it, babe.”

“No, you can’t. Because it isn’t there.”

“Okay. Sure. But it’s behind the chair.”

Your eyes narrowed at him, glancing back at your hiding space. You thought quickly, banging the pan against his head again and rushing to hide the satchel and tiara somewhere else, somewhere less obvious. You came back just in time to see him gain consciousness again with another groan.

“Could you stop doing that?”

“Why are you here? Are you some freaky serial killer?”

“I look freaky to you? Damn, babe, you really know how to deflate a guy’s ego. But no. I just - I was being chased by these guys, and I saw your tower so I… climbed it.”

You squinted, head tilting to the side, and Steve thought for a brief moment that it was adorable. That was before the throb in his head reminded him of the pan you were still holding.

“And you’re telling the truth?”

“Yes. Swear. Could you put the frying pan down, please?”

You sighed, reluctantly setting down the pan. “Okay. But I need to make a deal with you, first.”

“A deal? You’ve got me tied up here, babe, I don’t have much to offer.”

“Stop calling me that. And, I need you to take me somewhere.”

Steve tilted his head, urging you to continue with some more details. You just stared at him for a moment, not really knowing why you would trust a complete stranger with something like this: this was your lifelong dream. But, your mother wouldn’t indulge you, and he seemed nice enough. Nobody that pretty could truly be harmful, right?

“I - there’s these floating lights, in the kingdom. They happen every year, always on my birthday, and I’ve always wanted to see them.”

“Floating lights…” He trailed off, a confused look on his face that almost resembled a puppy. “The lanterns?”

“Um, yeah, I guess. I don’t really know what they’re called.”

Steve resisted the urge to ask anymore questions, finding this entire situation strange in the first place. “Okay. What do you need me for? You can’t just take yourself? Or have a friend bring you?”

“No. I don’t know my way there and besides, I don’t want to go… out there, alone. And if you haven’t noticed, it’d be a bit impossible for me to make any friends up here,” You gestured around you. How would you ever go to meet a friend? “My mother is a bit overprotective, and she doesn’t like for me to go outside. At all. But, she’s gone for three days and it’s my eighteenth birthday and I really need to see these lights.”

“You don’t go out? Like, ever? You’ve never been outside?” Steve questioned, making you shrink in on yourself as you shrugged. You knew it was an odd situation, but your mother was just keeping you safe.

“Anyway, if you bring me to see these lights and back… I’ll give you back your satchel and the tiara.”

“I could just find the tiara.”

“You won’t. Not this time. Besides, you’re trapped, and wouldn’t you like to get out of my hair?”

“Yes, that’s true.” Steve seemed to consider everything for a moment. “What if you give me back my satchel, and in return, you get nothing? Hasn’t my presence been gift enough, babe?”

“No. Stop calling me that.”

He sighed dramatically, before looking back at you with a defeated look. “Alright. You win, babe. I’ll take you to see the floating lights.”

[gatitties]

Dear friend

─Dio x fem!reader (Platonic) [Phantom Blood]

─Summary: You find yourself tied to the infamous Dio Brando, creating a strange relationship despite being complete opposites.

─Warnings: occ and a little angst i think¿, Dio is soft in this one

I was a little delulu while watching jojo's and listening to sad music late at night led me to write this 😔🤌🏻

Dio Brando's life was not good in general, condemned to live in misery since he was born, with the only source of love and hope dying little by little, his mother was the only thing that kept him sane during his childhood, once his mother's life vanished in just a breath, he thought he would never feel what he used to call humanity again. His father could not be considered human, after all he had monstrous and condemnable actions, being only scum deserving of the most painful death.

He thought that he would be condemned in a spiral of darkness and filth, that his only goal in life would be to wait for his father's death and take over the fortune of the Joestar family once they adopted him, then another ray of light broke his dark shell, where his heart bled with pain, where the most sensitive part of the human being was hidden, even from him, who thought that nothing could give him back that lost humanity.

Dio was making some money as usual, betting a couple of coins to win more in that filthy bar, the carefree conversations and fights were a dull noise to him at this point, but the explosions, the burning smell and the screaming of someone in the kitchen wasn't something that happened often, that was the first time he saw you.

You ran out of the kitchen with teary eyes, coughing from the smoke you had inhaled, some parts of your clothes were burned, your cheeks were red from the heat and the embarrassment of being scolded by your boss while everyone watched, although you recovered soon when you were sent to do anything other than cook, it definitely wasn't your strong point.

Neither was waiting tables since you tripped over your own feet several times, your balance betrayed you at the worst moments and your hands seemed to be made of butter, but you remained firm with your optimistic attitude, that, and you needed the money, you were not going to leave this job nor would you allow such a quick dismissal.

Dio thought you were stupid to say the least, clumsy, distracted, inept… but for some reason he couldn't take his eyes off your figure when you were juggling to leave the beers on the table next to him, he couldn't figure out if you were purposely ignoring the lustful gazes of some depraved people or were you really that ignorant of your surroundings, he found it endearing in a way.

"Hey you, pay attention to the damn game!"

He grimaced, fed up with the man, he made his final move, winning and enraging the guy he was playing against, he threw the coins across the table, but before Dio could grab them his face was smashed into the plate of hot food making a thud that stopped the sound throughout the bar for a second.

It happened before he could react, he was planning to hit that old geezer to break his nose, but someone had gotten ahead of him, before he realized it, a burnt frying pan hit the bastard's face, causing blood to drip from his mouth, some teeth shooting out from its place.

"Don't waste food, you stuck-up idiot!"

Your expression changed to a frown, although everyone ignored your outburst, it wasn't the first time you hit someone for doing something that bothered you, but coming from a family with limited resources made you appreciate every little thing, you were a brave fool, you could mess with the most dangerous person on the entire face of the earth just for standing up for your values and ideals, and that, that's what caught Dio Brando's attention.

He didn't really look for interactions with you, you only caused him a slight curiosity, but there were many people just as stupid as you, living a miserable life, accepting their fate without aspiring to much more, but destiny seemed to want to intertwine your paths, that, or he just began to notice your presence more once he noticed you.

Of course, you also began to notice him more, it's not every day you find people with such striking appearance in the suburbs you used to frequent, especially people your age, and especially those who move through the darkness like you.

You accepted all kinds of assignments, even if they were dangerous, you always had luck on your side and a handful of sharp or blunt objects, aim was the only thing that probably stands out about your physical abilities along with stealth, you had learned to move like a rat, dark alleys, damp sewers… you knew every nook and cranny of this city by heart.

And that was how your first real interaction happened, you were both hired to do some smuggling for a good amount of money, you had worked in pairs before, but meeting the person you were strangely seeing everywhere lately was strange, you weren't going to turn down the job anyway, money is money.

What started with some ups and downs in your relationship was how curt Dio was, his harsh comments and lack of empathy made you frown, you scolded him occasionally for being so impolite and rude, not only to you but to other people who didn't deserved it. It was a tug of war between the two, complete opposites attracting each other.

When the relationship began to heat up, or rather when the remains of goodness that remained in a broken child made a little hole in his bleeding heart, it was when you took care of a drunken Dio, you found him raving, beating to death some poor devils who had decided to mess with him that night, you would have suffered the same fate if you hadn't been lucky enough that before he hit you he tripped on a rock, hitting his head. You took it from there and helped him without asking for anything in return, which caused him to distance himself for a few weeks after coming back looking different.

"What's wrong with you? Huh?"

You pointed accusingly at the blonde, who slapped your finger away from his face, letting out some complaints.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh don't try to play that with me, the time working with you was enough to be able to see through you, ah, I know, did you find a partner!?"

His eyebrow twitched at your new explosion of emotions, grabbing your head to keep your body still as you started to surround him asking a bunch of questions about his supposed partner.

"No."

"Aww" you deflated at his harsh response, recovering immediately "Anyway, seriously, there's something weird about you, I can see it in your eyes."

You moved a little closer to his face once he released you, looking directly into his captivating crimson eyes, although in truth you were just looking at your reflection on his gaze, sticking out your tongue as if you were posing for a photo, he looked in disbelief, you were too stupid and he didn't understand why, why after leaving those suburbs did he return? Why did he keep visiting you if he no longer needed you for anything? Why did he come back after moving to a better life? His mind couldn't understand it, but his heart won this battle and he let the only good feelings guide him towards your clumsy person.

"Whatever makes you sleep better."

He found himself enjoying your presence, your voice, your silly thoughts, your insignificant emotions more than usual, he found another source of light that illuminated the cracks in his shattered heart, minimally healing his inner child, and in turn, he repudiated every inch of your being, so kind and pure for someone like him, were you ignoring his evil nature or were you really that naive to not notice all the red flags around him? He didn't know it, but he would prefer that it stay like this for a while longer, all of his plans were moving forward and you weren't part of them.

You silently observe the sunset, the warm colors gradually disappearing as you lean against the half-broken cement wall, this building used to be your meeting point for the assignments you had together. You look back at Dio, who is unusually thoughtful, you also immerse yourself in your own thoughts, you were conscious, conscious of everything that Dio was and will be, you only needed some information that he let escape between the lines and his behavior of greatness to know that your friend was someone evil, someone who wouldn't think for a second about ending someone's life if they were a threat, you knew it and yet… Was it selfish to want to maintain this friendship? Even knowing that he wasn't someone to admire? Someone who repudiated half the world? That didn't agree with most of your values? Well, you were human, and selfishness is one of the facets that characterizes humanity, you never asked for much in your life, you wanted to grant yourself this whim despite everything.

"I don't know what will happen from now on, but thank you for all these years, I never thought I could have this kind of connection with someone."

Your neck almost broke from the speed at which you moved it to look at Dio, who was facing away from you, there was no way he had said that, expressing so many emotions and feelings like never before, were you dreaming? Was this some kind of alternate reality? Your eyes began to water because of his words, yes, you were a sentimental softie.

"That's so nice Dio, you should say that more often, instead of 'shut up bitch' or 'you suck'!"

You jumped on his back like a baby koala, sniffling on his shoulder while he froze for a second, trying to shake off your crying form, you seemed as fragile as a twig at that moment but you clung to him like a damn leech. He took you off of him after a couple of minutes, unexpectedly his arms surrounded your figure, seeing you buried in a mass of muscles for the first time, you were going to make a stupid comment, but for once you decided to shut your big mouth, passing your arms through his back.

No one dared to say anything, well, the look he gave you after he separated from you was a silent threat so that you wouldn't say anything about this moment of weakness he had, after all Dio has no weaknesses, he is superior to everyone.

Certainly, everything changed from that day, the relationship cooled because he disappeared from your life, you understood that the change in lifestyle was what caused it and if in a certain part it was true, you wanted to check that he was doing it right, it wasn't the case when you discovered that he was trying to kill Mr. Joestar, who welcomed him with open arms.

Your heart squeezed at the information, you knew that your friend was not a saint, you knew that he was a horrible person with others, but you remained selfish in your decision not to see him as human scum, to continue loving him like any other person. Your thoughts didn't last long though, at least not with the new version of him.

You were scared when you found him in your room one night, in the darkest corner, staring as if you were a prey, you could see his agitated breath coming out like smoke from a chimney, his eyes were still the same, but they scared you.

"Has the cat eaten your tongue? It's me, Dio! I don't think you've forgotten about me, I haven't, dear friend."

"You're not- you're not my friend…"

Your words came out shaky, the lump in your throat growing the closer the blonde got, this had to be a bad dream, you had heard that your friend had died after trying to kill Jonathan Joestar, although his body was not found among the rubble of the mansion, this couldn't be true.

"No? Maybe you're just confused, I'm still me, I've discovered a new way of living! I don't need that bullshit humanity, a longer lasting, stronger way of life! I am my best version."

You grabbed the lamp on your nightstand, making him smile at your fear, he knew you used to throw random things when you were angry or scared.

"You are not Dio! You are not the Dio that I know… your look is no longer the same, even when it was mischievous and evil before, it contained that shine of hope."

"Hope? That's pathetic, but you're lucky, I'm giving you the opportunity to live with dignity as a superior being! Just for being you, my only friend."

A hand covered your mouth, knowing that you would scream when he was next to you in the blink of an eye, he laughed at your reaction, resting his chin on the curve between your shoulder and neck, he grimaced as he felt you licking his hand, at least you were still stupidly brave to do that.

"Well? Will you agree to reign over all those filthy humans? You can live forever, without worries like money, no more shitty jobs."

You closed your eyes tightly in a last attempt to wake up if this was a dream, accepting that it wasn't, you moved away from his body, almost falling off the bed, you turned your body slightly to face him directly, oh that certain look of yours, it made him smile.

"I'm sorry, but the Dio I know is dead, and I refuse to accept a deal from a stranger."

He began to laugh lightly without taking his eyes off you, in another blink his imposing figure caught you, feeling again the mass of muscles imprisoning you between chest and biceps, your face pressed to his heart made you listen to the calm rhythm of it.

"I didn't expect anything less from someone as stupid and clumsy as you, I honestly knew that you were going to reject eternal youth, it's a real shame… but coming here was more of a whim."

His grip loosened a little, he rested his head on top of yours, closing his eyes for a few seconds, taking in as much of your scent as he could and it was gone as quickly as it came, you were barely able to react as the heat around you disappeared in a fraction of second, you looked with doubt at the open window, noticing how he was watching you from somewhere, you frowned, still with your lamp in your hand you threw it out the window, closed it as quickly as you could, you got under the sheets as if you were going to scare away the monsters of the night, closing your eyes although with a small smile when you heard the moan of Dio, who had been hit by your impeccable shot.

If you weren't his dear friend, you would have been three meters underground for a long time.

[dreamcatcher2113]

The Sunflower and The Dragon: The Dragon’s Sunflower

Summary: No one would have that Aegon Targaryen would settle down, and commit to someone. Then he met you. Aegon started to become a better person since he met you. The two of you just made sense when you are together.

Author Note: Just another cute little series that I want to do.

Warnings: Suggested Sexual Content

Masterlist

The Dragon’s Sunflower

It was early morning, Aegon was dead to the world. He usually doesn’t wake up at ass crack of dawn. So when he turned to your side of the bed, expecting you to be there. Instead he feels your side of the bed empty. Aegon should have known that you are already up, he looks at the clock that was on the bed table. It was 9 in the morning, Aegon groaned as he got out of bed. He loves you dearly, even though you love waking up before noon is a mystery to him. Aegon puts on gray sweatpants, and decide to just go shirtless because why the fuck not. It’s yours and his apartment, he can do whatever he wants.

Aegon walks out of your shared room and turns to the kitchen. He starts to hear music, and then he sees you with your hair up in a messy bun, and only wearing one of his black shirts. He couldn’t help but to smirk at the sight. Aegon sits on one of the chairs on the island, watching you sway your hips. The shirt is a little long, but it left room to the imagination. His goldendoodle Sunfyre came up barking happily. You turned and saw your boyfriend sitting on the chair, smirking at you. 

“Oh goodness. Aegon you scared me.” You were startled at his sudden appearance, but smiled regardless.

“Good morning my sunflower, what are you making?” Aegon asked.

“I am making french toast.” You said sweetly, putting the bread on the frying pan.

Aegon chuckled a little bit, since your back was turned you didn’t see him walking behind you. He wraps his arms around your waist, you jumped a bit but relaxed. Aegon starts kissing your neck.

“Aegon.” You called out his name.

“Yes, my love.” He replied.

“I’m trying to make breakfast for us.”  You said, but not really trying to pull away from him. Leaning into him closer, you love feeling his touch. 

Aegon smirked into your skin. “I’m not hungry at the moment. I’m craving for something else.” He continues to assault your neck, moving his hand to your hips, rubbing circles on them. Wanting to feel your lips, he spins you around so you are facing him. Aegon immediately smashed his lips against yours. He licks your bottom lip, asking for access and of course you gave it to him. Your hands begin to travel to his hair, gripping it. Aegon couldn’t get enough of you, you have become his addiction. The both of you pulled apart for air, his lips made their way back to your neck this time he wants to find the little special spot that makes you weak in the knees. His hands travel to the bottom of the shirt you are wearing a little bit, exposing a little bit of the dark green lace panties that Aegon loves so much. 

“Aegon.” You moaned a bit.

“Yes sunflower?” Aegon said against your neck, still raising the shirt a bit more.

“The stove is still on, and I really don’t want to explain to our landlord why we burned our kitchen down.” You explained, feeling Aegon sucking on the spot on your neck that makes you feel weak.

Chuckling a bit, Aegon skillfully turns off the stove and he picks you up and places you on the counter that is next to the stove, earning a yelp from you. He places himself between your legs, and you wrap them around his waist. The two of you start kissing again, his hands gripping into the shirt that you are wearing, and sliding it up more. While your hands explore his neck and his hair. Aegon pulls you closer, and moves the collar of the shirt, so he can kiss the space between your neck and shoulders and starts marking you up again.

“My love.” You said so sweetly, one hand gripping his hair while the other grips on his bareback.

“I’m a little busy Princess.” He said, kissing your neck this time.

Giving up, you just let Aegon do what Aegon does. Not that you are complaining. Wanting to mark him up too, you make him pull away from you for a bit. He looks at you with puppy eyes, and pouts a little bit. You giggled at his reaction, and started kissing his neck. Aegon moans a little bit when you start to suck on the spot on his neck. Once you pull away, you admire your work. Aegon smirks and starts kissing you once again.

“Gods I want you sunflower.” Aegon growls in your ear.

“What’s stopping you my dragon?” You asked.

Aegon chuckles a bit, he was about to pull the shirt off but then his phone begins to ring. Usually he would just ignore it but he recognized that ringtone, and knows that it’s his mom that’s calling. He grunts in frustration, a little irritated that the two of you were interrupted. 

You giggle a bit. “You should probably go get that.”

Aegon groans again. “Fine.” He gives a quick peck, and leaves to answer his phone.

You couldn’t help but laugh a little bit. You hop off of the counter and start making breakfast again. You hear his footsteps again, hearing Aegon talking to his mom. “Just give me one sec mom, I’ll put you on speaker.”

“Alright mom, you’re on speaker.” Aegon said. As he sits on the chair that he sat on before.

“Hello Y/N.” You hear Alicent.

“Hey Alicent.” You yelled back, still making french toast.

“I was wondering if you would like to come to a family dinner at our place tomorrow night.” Alicent said over the phone.

You looked at Aegon, mouthed if he wanted to go. Even though his relationship with his mother and the rest of his family has gotten better, there are still wounds that need healing. As much as you love his family, Aegon’s well being is more important to you. Aegon gave you a nod, telling you that it’s okay.

“We’ll be there Alicent.” You answered, putting the last of the french toast on the plate. Putting them on the island where Aegon is sitting.

“Great! We will be seeing you tomorrow night. It’ll be nice seeing you both.” Alicent said.

“It’ll be nice seeing you too Alicent.” You said.

“I have to go. Love you both.” Alicent said.

“Love you too mom.” Aegon replied, and hung up on the phone. Aegon sighed, you reached one of your hands to hold on to his. Without hesitation he holds your hand back. Rubbing his thumb across your knuckles, grounding himself a little bit.

“Are you sure you want to go, baby? We don’t have to if you don’t want to.” You suggested, looking over your boyfriend with a worried look.

Aegon shakes his head no. “No, sunflower. I want to go. Mom has been trying, and I want to show her that I am too.”

You walk around the island and sit on Aegons lap. Wrapping your arms around his neck, while Aegon has his arms around your waist so you wouldn’t fall.

“You have been trying my love. You have made so much progress, and I am so proud of you.” You said. Putting your forehead against his, smiling at him. 

Aegon smiles back at you. “Thank you, sunflower.”

“Of course, my dragon.” You said back, giving him a quick peck on the lips. The two of you started feeding each other the french toast you made. The both of you were laughing, smiling and having a good time. Moments like these, makes you feel so thankful that you fell in love with Aegon. Even though things started rocky between the two of you, you wouldn’t have it any other way. You and Aegon are happy together, and both of you have become better people for each other. You love this man, and he loves you too.

[ntls-24722]

Debu Neanderthals!!!

Also known as the Simmons.

So! These guys are based off of DJMM's beta design! The teeth are stained just like in Debu but instead, they're stained with tannins, which is the same stuff that gorilla teeth are often stained with in the wild that makes their teeth black! Because of that, and the way it chips, I was able to make them kind of resemble the green soundwaves on his old mouth. They also have black scleras and more prominent iris colors, which I hoped would resemble the look of his swirly eyes? Their evolutionary reason is so that it's easier to follow gazes the same way we have white scleras, except they went the different direction and had the irises to be really bright and prominent so they stand out as much as Sans's eye. Debu kind of technically went the same way we do, it's just less... constant?

Onto the general, non-djmm-related traits: They don't live in the same place as the Debu, they're in a more tropical environment where sunlight isn't so damn harsh and is also a lot wetter - their skin lighter and smoother than Debu for those two reasons respectively. They're smaller, even though there's more food, but there's less space since there's also a bunch of trees, and for that reason they're actually a lot more vertical than the very wide debu, since they don't really climb. These "neanderthals" also have a less flat face unlike the Debu who look like their faces got smashed in with a frying pan, they still have a little bit of their basal snouts, and they also have a lot more hair than Debu, they still have their fur - just as a long mane though. Finally, they don't have as much mouth-glow - they still do have some! their very red mouths are due to the weak, red bioluminescence that they do have. Their environment is darker than usual just due to the sheer density that the land coral canopies have, so the bioluminescence is still kinda useful, but the darkness doesn't compare to the complete darkness that Debu live in, in their cliffside caves.

Also; they're sapient! So hooray on them. So now there's 2 Debu and 2 Zebrapeople (i'm not counting the quaggaelves... that one's sapience is kinda sus)

There's a secret third "debu," it's not a member of their genus like this guy is, but it's more like member of their family that I wanna talk about but I need to set a specific, spooky stage for them

[fractualized]

Who do I speak to for a live action Batman scene in which Wayne Manor is infiltrated while Alfred is cooking dinner, and he fights the intruders off using only kitchen equipment? And not so much with knives– that's no fun– but he captures an attacker's knife with a pair of tongs. He uses a frying pan as a bullet shield. He smashes a saucepan of roux in an intruder's face and clangs the back of another's skull with cast iron. He pins a guy against the fridge with a rolling pin to the throat. He breaks someone's hand with a meat tenderizer. People are dodging ramekins left and right. By the end, the last attacker is cowering before Alfred, who raises a ladle over his head and demands to know who these bastards work for.

Matt Reeves, anyone, are you out there?!

[xiaoscarasimp]

Smol bit of cat boi smut 3

So im back at it again. ^^ this didn't turn out quite the way I wanted it to, but that just means I have stuff for pt 4

Nsfw(duh) mdni

triggers: afab reader, somewhat sadistic scara, mirror sex, piv sex, consensual voyeurism, oral(both give and receive) cum eating and of course SiZe KinK

Cat Boi Smut 3 

After a few hectic weeks of trying to make heads or tails of the magic book Lyney gave you, you decided it was time to test it out. However, you were a bit hesitant, in fear of screwing up, so you decided to call that Fontaine twink.  You dial his number and it rings a few times too many for your comfort. When he finally does pick up, his voice is groggy with sleep; it almost sounded like you had woken him up at 2 PM on a Tuesday. 

“H-hello?” He asked, not sure of who was calling. 

“Oh, hi, Lyney? This is y/n,” You keep your voice even, but the nerves start creeping up on you. “Remember that magic book you lent me the other day? I want to test it out, but am rather scared to try it with just me and Scara. W-will you help us out?" Ah, shit, you stuttered. 

“O-oh, hi y/n!” His voice gained a bit more energy. “Oh, yeah, sure. Is your cat boy ok with testing it out? I help without both of y’all’s consent.” 

“...did you just say ‘y’all’s?’”

“...not at all. Ok, maybe I did; I slip up when tired. When are you free next?” 

“Let me get with Scara, but I feel like Friday night should be good.” Not that your cat boy ever had any plans outside the occasional show he’d like to watch as it airs; there wasn’t anything on Friday that you knew of. 

Lyney yawns on the other line. “Sounds good. I’m going back to bed, late night last night.” 

Your stomach starts getting butterflies at the thoughts of your next adventures. While you wanted it to be just you and Scaramouche, you didn’t want to take the chance of stuff going wrong; plus you had a feeling that your cat boy was starting to like not only being with you, but also with Lyney as well.

Once you get home, you let Scaramouche know that you two have a "date" with Lyney Friday night, and that you were going to test out the book of magic. His ears perked up at this, his tail twitching happily; however, his face portrayed none of the excitement that his body was. 

"Better not screw anything up," He pointedly says, although with a bit of affection. "Been getting bored lately because someone's too pussy to try anything on her own." The cat boy has the audacity to wink at you, smirking and glowering. 

You tackle him to the sofa and straddle him, hands to his throat. Scaramouche still has that cheeky grin; he knows you won't actually hurt him. You'll just tease him a little bit, make him beg for you. He starts laughing darkly as you tighten your hands playfully, his gaze egging you on. 

"I'm no pussy. If anyone's the pussy here it's you, pussy cat boy," you laugh. You release your hold on him and ruffle his hair and ears. He scowls at you, hopes smashed (unlike him). 

"I have dinner to cook tonight. Was thinking about a stir fry style dinner, i.e. fried rice beef and a few veggies. If you're a good cat boy, maybe I'll even pan fry you some shrimp." You say as you get up. His tail flicked happily, mouth was drooling slightly at the thoughts of pan fried shrimp.

As you're cooking dinner, you see Scaramouche scrolling his phone, even typing out a few things here and there. Usually, this was not abnormal behavior, but since you mentioned the date for Friday night, he was probably looking for ideas of what to do to you. The cat boy had a sadistic streak going for him, and how far he would take things with you underneath him had you a bit worried. 

"Hey, Scara," you call out. "Shrimp's done! Pan fried in garlic and herb butter." You puff out your chest proudly. The stir fry was also done, but Scaramouche had little to no interest in it; he only had eyes for the shrimp. 

As you guys discuss plans and boundaries for Friday, you realize that almost anything was on the table as long as it didn't kill or permanently mutilate either of you. Oral, toys, anal, pegging: all things that you and the cat boy consented to. 

~~♡♡♡~~

Friday night had arrived at last. You and Scaramouche picked out some appropriate outfits for the night: you wearing a shorter and tighter than normal skirt with a lacy top with a nice lingerie set, complete with thigh high stockings and garter belt underneath. Your cat boy did not put as much effort in his outfit: going in his usual skin tight black turtleneck and skinny jeans. You weren't going to deny it: that look suited him very well; it accentuated his sharp features and complimented his hair very well.

You knock on Lyney's door three times, and wait a bit before hearing frantic footsteps on the other side before the door swings open. Lyney’s hair was almost perfect, however you could still tell a few hairs were out of place; he must have overslept a bit. 

“H-hey, welcome in!” Lyney stammers; very unlike him. “I was just getting some props ready for tonight. Have you guys eaten? I have a roast going.” He was speaking a thousand words a minute. It was actually rather cute to see the usually suave magician flustered. 

“Lyney, calm down,” You laugh. “A roast sounds lovely, don’t you think, Scara?” The cat boy was scowling in the background, not fond of the light blush on your face when talking to the blonde. 

“..fine, whatever makes you happy, y/n.” His tail flicked in annoyance. Scaramouche wasn’t fond of beef, but he knew that he needed the energy for their activities tonight. The cat boy’s eyes sizzled at the thought of those activities. 

As Lyney invites the two of you in, you can’t help but to be in awe of his house. It had an old-timey aesthetic, lined with wooden bookcases and dressers in the hall way. The hallway split off into multiple rooms, with a modern looking kitchen at the end. The smell of the roast greeted you as you got closer to the kitchen; it had obviously been slow cooking for hours upon hours. 

“Make yourselves at home,” Lyney says in an upbeat voice. “I’ll grab the plates. Eat as much as you like, my siblings have already had their fill.” 

He must mean Lynette, you muse to yourself.

“So when do we get to the fun?” Scaramouche asks abruptly, ears twitching impatiently. “Save the pleasantries and let’s get on with it. I need you to hurry up and teach y/n how to work the damn book so I can get rid of you." 

Lyney almost teleports across the room and grabs Scaramouche’s chin, purple eyes twinkling mischievously. "We'll see how long you'll be saying that, mon chéri. I think you'll find some of the more fun things can only be done between you and I." He winks and gracefully grabs plates and chairs for dinner. If you didn't know better, you'd think that you were watching the furniture and tableware come to life. 

As you guys eat, you set boundaries for the night; each party having a say in what they did and did not want to do along with safe words. Lyney offers up toys or all sizes for you guys to use, along with the thoughts of sitting some of the action out to let you enjoy your cat boy one on one. He wasn’t going to leave you alone in case something went wrong; he’d be watching over you. 

“Oh, yeah, I completely forgot to mention, yes you will be getting cat ears and a tail again; it’s part of procedure at this point. Don't ask why; apparently the creator of the tome had a thing for cat boys or cat girls or something like that," Lyney mentions casually. You weren't going to lie though: having cat ears and tail made you feel closer to your precious cat boy.

Lyney leads you two to one of the side rooms that has a bed with a canopy, surrounded by mirrors and few dim lights. There was a dresser on the left side of the bed, supposedly with the lube and toys Lyney had mentioned over dinner. The sheets were pink and appeared to be satin and the comforter was rather plush.

"Here you guys go!" Lyney leads you two in, arms stretched out. "The mirrors are two way, so I can see you, but you can't see me. Any questions? Remember: the magic words are felis nekomas. I did not make the phrase; blame the creator."

"Felis nekomas!" You say in a timid voice, scared of the tome not responding to you. To your surprise, you feel the sensation of the cat ears and tail sprouting from your head and back, wiggling on their own at first. You catch Scaramouche looking at you in awe when he turns away, face flushed with pink.

"Now, the shrinking or growing is variable," Lyney continues on. "Since it's a two way street, you can shrink him and he can do the same to you. Likewise with making each other bigger. Now granted, you can also be selfish and use the magic on yourself, but it'll be less efficient. Any questions so far? Also, same rules apply as last time: cumming will make you shrink and if you cum in or on each other, you will grow" You and Scaramouche shake your heads. "I'll keep an eye on you both; make sure to put on a good show for me, will you? I want to enjoy myself tonight too." 

“Lyney, what is the actual purpose of the room?” You question him. 

“It was my master’s room, and where I learned how to do magic. I figured it would be a great place to set the mood.”

You and your cat boy exchange glances, wondering what to try first, and how to give the magician the show of a lifetime. You decide that you were going to let Scaramouche take the lead since he was not in control at all last time. As the door shuts behind you two, you drag your cat boy over the bed and start kissing him gently, starting on the forehead, then progressing down to his lips. 

As you deepen the kiss by biting gently at his lip, his hands move themselves down your body, eventually finding their way to your tail. Once he was at the base, he tugged gently, sending shivers up your spine. You gasp and Scaramouche uses this opportunity to thrust his tongue in your mouth, swirling his tongue around yours. 

"Sc-scara," you moan, your senses overwhelmed by him. He deepens the kiss, and starts to push you backwards on the bed, one hand moving to cradle the back of your head. His knee moves between your legs, rubbing against your throbbing pussy.

"Heh," He chuckles. "If kissing has you this turned on, I'd hate to see the state of your pussy." The cat boy practically rips off your shirt, revealing the lacey bra. His eyes widen; you were wearing his favorite lingerie set. 

"So cute, but don't you think you're wearing a bit too much?" 

Scaramouche unhooks your bra and discards it, leaving your erect nipples exposed. The room wasn't cold by any means; they were stiff from arousal. He leans down and swirls your nipple with his tongue and groping the other one with his hand. His slightly rougher than normal tongue enhances the sensation ten fold. As he bites at the nipple, running his tongue over the sensitive bud even faster, your hands start to move towards your dripping sex. Scaramouche grabs your hands and holds them above your head, shaking his head. 

"Now," the cat boy says with a devilish grin. "It wouldn't be fair of my pretty little cat girl to get her pleasure first." His nails dig into your wrists as you rub your legs together in an attempt at soothing the burning sensation of arousal.

He presses his knee further into your crotch, his face daring you to rub yourself off on it. You start to rub your still clothed pussy on his leg, when he pulls it away, tutting at you. 

"You still have too much on," as he takes off your skirt, leaving you in a lacy thong and thigh high socks. Scaramouche knew about the stockings as they completed your outfit very well, but the selection of panties was a pleasant surprise. 

The cat boy slides the crotch of your almost non existent underwear to one side and starts running his tongue across your clit. As you approach the peak, Scaramouche growls, "Say my name," through licks.

"S-scara! I'm c-cumming!!" You are almost screaming at this point, pleasure rolling over you. “Scara, pl-please! I-I need your dick inside m-me!” 

“Good girls cum in my mouth first.”

As you cum, you start to feel the familiar icy hot sensation of shrinking underneath your lover. Your formerly too tight underwear and stockings were now comically too big. In contrast though, his tight clothing becoming even tighter; his bulge becoming even more prominent. Scaramouche had a Cheshire cat-like grin on his face; the sight of your small body underneath him, the anticipation of your tight, hot pussy, waiting to be filled by his throbbing cock. 

Once the shrinking stops, you notice that you are about seven inches to a foot smaller now, but Scaramouche grew by the same margin. He towers over you as he grabs your pretty little face and slams his lips into yours. Scaramouche quickly unbuttons his pants and practically rips them off, revealing a big, flaming red cock, dripping with precum. You start to wonder how that's even going to fit in you at this point, but more importantly: you were enraptured at the thought of being impaled by your lover. 

"You want this in your pussy, don't you?" He smirks, not missing the lust in your eyes. "Too bad. Good little whores only get this cock in their mouth." You start salivating at the sight of the precum dripping down the shaft. "But first: I think you deserve this." He holds up a slightly bigger than average dildo with a clit stimulator, although at this size, the toy was almost too big. Scaramouche slams the toy inside you, causing you to moan a little bit. He shows you the remote with an evil grin on his face, hinting that he was going to turn it on at any moment.

"And you're not allowed to cum until I do. Can't have you getting any smaller before you please me. Now: suck" 

You gently start licking the tip of his cock, starting at the slit and working your tongue around the head. Your tiny hands were gently massaging up and down the shaft, although they could barely wrap themselves around the large member. As Scaramouche moans in pleasure from stimulation, he finds himself wanting more. 

“Haaa, don’t be afraid to stick the whole thing in your mouth, you know. If you do, I’ll reward you,” the cat boy moans. As soon as your mouth wraps around the tip, he turns the toy to the lowest setting, making you moan in surprise and delight. The vibrations send shivers down his shaft, his cock almost bursting from the pleasure. 

With a sadistic smile, he looks down on you and cranks the toy up the max setting making you yelp and moan in surprise. 

“S-Scara!” You cry, tears pulling at the edges of your eyes. All of your senses were being overwhelmed by the taste and smell of his dick and the vibrating toy in your pussy. “I ne-need to cum!” You manage to moan with his member in your mouth.

“Good girls w-wait for their p-partner to cum first,” He moans, ears twitching in pleasure. Scaramouche just needed more of your tiny mouth and was prolonging the act to try to get more of it.

You feel his dick pulsating in your mouth along with your abused clit and all the sensations sent you over the edge before your partner could attain his high. You groan in frustration and pleasure as you shrink with your mouth stuffed full of cock leaking even harder than before. Scaramouche notices that the toy was becoming too big for your hole, and begins leaving a bulge in your stomach and starts fucking your face faster and faster. 

"Haa, you f-feel so d-damn tight. A small, perfect little mouth, j-just for m-me," He moans out. "B-be a good girl a-and swallow it all, hmm." You nod vigorously, the tip of his massive cock barely in your mouth. Your tongue runs over his slit right before he cums in your mouth, a sweet, salty, but yet bitter release. You swallow the entirety of his load, opening your mouth as proof you swallowed it all. 

As the magic would have it, you eventually grew a little bit and your cat boy was back to his original size, if not a bit smaller; his pants and shirt that were tight to begin with now a bit looser. You wrap your tail around his, noticing how right it felt. As you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, you became self-conscious of how small you looked beside him now, but somehow it felt so right. 

You had forgotten the toy was still inside of you as Scaramouche pulled it out, it  was dripping with your juices. The cat boy did something you’d never expect him to do: lick the toy clean, growing a bit as he did so. After the toy was licked clean, he then shoved his fingers back in your abused hole and swirled them around, hitting that sweet spot, causing you to arch your back in pleasure. 

“Hnng, Scara,” You moan, voice becoming winey. “I just c-came, i-it’s too much.” 

His ear flicked, as if he heard something in the background. “Shh, darling, we still have to give the magician a show of a lifetime,” he murmurs in your ears, breath stimulating you even further. 

Scaramouche lifts you up effortlessly and slams you down on his dick, facing away from him, staring at the two of you in the mirror. You try to turn your face away in shame but his delicate but strong hands grab your chin and force you to look at yourself, face stained with tears of pleasure. He was covered in sweat, hair plastered to his face, but it made him look even hotter, not that he wasn’t before. 

“I think our friend is watching; if I didn’t know better, I’d think he was enjoying himself. Same could be said for yourself.” His voice was a drug at this point, clouding over your mind.  The more he whispered sweet nothings in your ear, the more turned on you became, bouncing up and down on his cock, looking at yourself in the mirror, embarrassment. You tried to look away a few more times, but each and every time, he’d force you to look back at the mirror, pulling on your tail or ears as he did. 

All of a sudden, he bites down on your neck, your walls clenching down even harder on his dick as he does so, prompting him to bite even harder harder on the other side. The cat boy almost came the first time your walls clenched down on him, but the second time he bit down, he emptied ropes of hot cum in your abused hole. 

You can feel him shrinking underneath you, his shirt almost two sizes too big now. As you got bigger, you could feel him starting to get hard again despite just cumming inside of you just now. Your poor cat boy just couldn’t get enough of you, big or small. He tries to move out from under you, but you flip him around and straddle his face so he could lick you clean. 

“Now, lick,” you command, and he nods furiously. Scaramouche’s semi-rough tongue starts at your clit, stimulating it to almost another orgasm, but you decide to hold out for one last round. He then moves his way to your hole, tongue lapping up every last bit of the mixed juices. This time, however, you stop the spell from changing your sizes; you wanted to end the night like this before canceling the spell. 

“Mmph,” Scaramouche moans. “So b-bitter; I l-like it. Aren’t I supposed to be growing though?” He suddenly asks in a clearer voice. 

You giggle; teasing what you could see of his ears. “Sorry, honey, I want you to stay underneath me for a bit longer.” 

As he slurped the juices from your sex, you orgasm one last time, before releasing the spell, returning you both back to normal albeit a bit messier than what you started. Your tail and cat ears recede slowly,  eventually disappearing entirely. Panting, you look around for Lyney when he appears right beside you, clapping with a big smile on his face despite being a bit disheveled himself. If you had to guess, he was probably pleasuring himself while you and Scaramouche were going at it. The fact that mirrors were two way meant that he could have seen how small and needy you had become, the thought making you blush slightly.

"Bravo, mon chéri" Lyney says, eyes twinkling. He then grabs Scaramouche’s face, eyeing him top to bottom. His ears flicked in annoyance, jerking his face out of the magician's hand. "You guys are marvelous! Especially you, Scaramouche. The look on your face as you-” Your cat boy’s hand covers his mouth before he could go any further. You chuckle awkwardly, still pretty well fucked out and basking a bit in the after glow. 

“Shut it…” Scaramouche mumbles, a flush of red marking his face. Although he knew that Lyney was watching them, and even knew exactly where he was to try and give him the best angle, he still was embarrassed after the fact. He turns his head towards you and asks if you two were staying the night as it was quite late and none of you guys had anywhere to be in the morning. You sarcastically ponder for a moment before saying yes.

“Great! I knew this was going to happen, so I prepared a room for you two!” Lyney absolutely beamed; it wasn’t often he had guests, especially ones that put on such a show for him. He does an over exaggerated magician's bow.“Right this way then!” 

You two follow him down the long hallway before arriving at a wooden door which opens into a large open room, not unsimilar to the one you were just in, minus the mirrors. The bed had the same type of satin sheets, but this time in blue although the comforter was just as plush as the other one. 

“Room comes with its own bath so you guys can refresh yourselves before bed. I feel like you guys might need it,” Lyney winks. Knowing what he was getting at, you accepted his offer, but told him no funny business. Scaramouche scowls in the background, but the magician shrugs him off. 

Thanking him as he steps out, you strip down to go relax in the bath. You extend the offer to the cat boy to come in with you, but he shakes his head and mutters something about not wanting to get water in his ears. 

Sighing, you step into the huge, white bathroom that looked like it had a swimming pool in the middle, which you discovered was the actual relaxing area. Upon closer inspection, you notice that this pool had what looked like hot tub jets-perfect for relaxing sore muscles after a long stressful day. You almost start to wonder if this was Lyney’s personal bathroom, but shake your head at the preposterous thought. No way he would let guests into his precious space, right? 

You head over to the wash area and rise yourself off before settling down into the tub, letting the heat and jets add to the bliss of being fucked out earlier. As your mind starts to wander, a shadow looms over you. 

“Scara?” You question sleepily. “I thought you didn’t want to bathe with me tonight.” 

A pair of hands cover your eyes, startling you awake. You try to squirm out of them, but they have a firm grip on you.

"Guess who?" 

[journey-to-the-attic]

Is it weird that I want some reaction, and conon reaction to demigod!IK (It would be cool if you did)

i'll see what i can cook up!! just keep in mind that i don't really know how pj works lol - i'm basically looking at the fandom wiki page for demigod abilities and trying to construct stuff around that

it'd be funny if ik had started encountering monsters shortly before being summoned to the devildom, so when she gets there she immediately starts trying to fight everyone

she was given a scimitar imbued with abilities of some sort but she keeps defaulting to hitting people with a frying pan

i say maybe this is a situation where monsters found them first and (drawing on my faint memory of the first book) she fully thinks her dad was killed by one, and is currently on the run

meanwhile the actual gods are trying to track her down to tell her what's going on and ik is somehow evading every last one of them

basically she has no idea what's going on and is super paranoid and is also discovering a whole bunch of demigod powers so she is going CRAZY

so she just. keeps going. diavolo is trying to defuse the situation and explain things but ik is just like "ARGHHH GO AWAY" and THWACKS him the pan

lucifer has to send his other brothers out of the council room while he attempts to help get things under control, but wow is ik a handful

of course they don't want to actually kill her, but ik thinks they do, and is retaliating accordingly

i'm going to say that the powers she gets from melinoe are mostly diminished versions of the powers of children of hades - which includes a whole bunch of stuff actually

but at this point she hasn't really developed them, so what's happening is that she keeps zipping around the dark spots of the room, hitting the demons in the face with her frying pan, then running away again

then she smashes through a window and starts running, and now everyone is really panicking

past a certain point they have to resort to trying to settle her down using force - which is unnerving, because ik just keeps going through all the injuries that were meant to immobilise her

the thing that finally gets her to calm down is when diavolo and lucifer accidentally run into each other cartoon-style, and it makes her laugh so hard that it snaps her out of it

she gets like half an explanation out before one of the rad professors arrives and immediately sedates her

diavolo finally gets to have a proper conversation with her. prior to going in he has a serious talk with lucifer about how they might have to just send her back if she's going to be so disruptive and hostile

when he comes out of the conversation he's immediately like "actually she is staying here forever"

he feels so bad for her dude. like, that is way too much to be going through at that age

lucifer is hesitant but can't go against diavolo's wishes, so he begrudgingly agrees to keep watch over her

ik is actually quite well-behaved after resting for a while, but the other brothers are low-key a little terrified of her now

lucifer, to be honest, thinks it's a bit of a blessing because at least now they're a bit quieter around the house. though he does feel a little bad for ik now

ik befriends solomon first in this au (he hears about what she did upon first arrival and thinks it's hilarious)

maybe solomon already knows about demigod thing (perhaps he even is one himself) so he's the one who explains everything

then monsters start appearing in the devildom as well and the brothers wake up at like 2am to find ik basically fist-fighting one in the yard while simultaneously trying to shush it

they sort of warm up to each other after that

hmm would belphie be able to kill ik in this au?? maybe if he tried really hard... although at the same time ik does have some nightmare-related powers from melinoe so maybe she just helps him out and he doesn't end up trying

[brokenlovesong]

Two-bit after JFT hcs please

I tried really hard to think of like a bunch of little ones but I got some reason was struggling. But here are like the two main alternate headcanons I have

This first one is my personal favorite (I'm very biased) because it's the one I used in my ace x marcia fic :) After Two-Bit gets jumped, Marcia stays behind to find out what she can do. Two-Bit is in really rough shape and can barely even stand so he tells her to go to Buck Merril's and find Dally. They then bring him back to the Curtis' to get patched up.

For all the Dar-Bit fans, this is when Darry finally confesses his feelings for Two-Bit. He's trying to keep it together because he's no stranger to having to patch people up. His brothers are Sodapop and Ponyboy, after all. But this is different. He'd never seen Two-bit in this rough of a shape. It's not until Two-Bit puts his hands over Darry's that Darry even realizes how badly they were shaking. "I just don't like seein' ya like this," he confesses. It's even worse because he knows it's Paul who helped do this all to Two-Bit, someone he once cared about. He wants to go back out there, find Paul, and smash his face so far into the concrete no one will be able to tell who he is. But Two-Bit grabs his hand and holds him back. "You'll get your chance with the rumble. Just stay with me. Distract me from how they messed up my beautiful face."

also here's two random hc that aren't connected to anything specific:

Two-Bit didn't go home for the first couple of days because he didn't want to freak his mom and sister out with how bad he looked. But his sister showed up at the Curtis' banging on the door cause she knew he'd be there and demanded to see him to know he's ok and that's when he realized he was scaring them more keeping stuff from them.

To prepare for the rumble, Two-Bit began sparing with Dally every night. He didn’t drink anything all week because he really wanted to focus on their sessions (and because Darry would beat him over the head with a frying pan if he drank while having a concussion)

[windex-for-blood]

Today in "Games That Will Never Be Made"

Aggrivated by Smash's absence from the EVO main stage and legally forbidden from killing Sakurai Masahiro in order to make a new installment, Nintendo decides to semi-revive the NES fan favorite Pro Wrestling with the reveal of a new Mario Sports entry.

The opening cinematic is a swooping shot of four wrestling rings (arranged like a D-Pad), in which four matches are already happening. A panning shot starts on Mario and Bowser doing standard Mario vs. Bowser shit (dodging fireballs, getting swiped at by claws), moving to King Boo and Petey Piranha pushing and palm-striking each other sumo-style.

The camera stops and goes out of focus, as Luigi and Waluigi comically enter the frame. They're having the cliched nerd slap-fight, with Luigi wailing miserably as Waluigi laughs spitefully.

Pushing his opponent away, Luigi suddenly stops, looking between Waluigi and the ring his brother is in, with Kevin Afghani giving his most Martinete-esqe "eh?"

He makes a time out motion to Waluigi. A speech bubble hovers near his head, containing an icon of a red nose with a spikey mustache next to a question mark. Luigi points to the bubble. Walugi's eyes narrow in annoyance, and he points to the fourth ring with a distinctly unimpressed "weh".

A sudden cut shows Wario, in a shoddily modified Warioman outfit, leaping from the top rope onto an unseen opponent, who is represented by a first-person camera. Wario lands atop his foe, and begins throwing man-sized punches at the opponent. After a few blows, a frying pan pops up and blocks his fist. As Wario leaps sway, clutching his hand, the camera spins to reveal he has been pummeling none other than CAPTAIN SYRUP. She kips up and starts running towards her archenemy. With a shot from between Wario's legs, we watch Syrup slide to a stop kneeling on one knee, and she reels her arm back with the distinctive sound of a shotgun being cocked. The next shot is a close-up of Wario's suddenly blue-tinged face, with tears shooting out of the ducts and bullets of sweat on his brow, the upwards-shooting speedlines confirming that he had clearly been crotched, Chyna-style. A jagged shout-bubble shoots out of Wario's mouth, revealing the title:

SUPER MARIO GRAPPLERS

[jaywings]

Me: Cringe is dead!!

Also me: reading my old fanfics feels like wading through molasses while repeatedly smashing my face with a frying pan tho

[psicadetterra]

What is going on with Maloof's head? No, really. Look at it.

(Turnaround made by mechmolar. I owe you my life.)

It's a goddamn optical illusion. Sometimes there's baby face, sometimes there isn't. It's a GEOMETRIC baby face at that. His head is also FUCKHUGE. It's the same size as his body. His poor face was smashed in with a frying pan, so he has a nose only sometimes from certain angles. It's honestly fascinating. I want to set him on one of those rotating platforms and just rotate him slowly and observe closely.

[whump-or-whatever]

Sam Beckett Whump - Quantum Leap (1989)

Whump scenes for the main character, Sam Beckett, in the 1989 TV show Quantum Leap.

Spoilers ahead!

S1E1- anxiety, amnesia, emotional

S1E2- crying

S1E3- grabbed by the neck, punched in the face, bloody nose, punched in face and falls to ground

S1E4- hit during boxing repeatedly, cut on brow, ko’d

S1E5- falls off a horse, fakes hurting his thumb, sore, punched in the face

S1E7- razor held to neck

S1E8- punched in the shoulder several times, then in the gut

S1E9- hit with bag, almost falls down an elevator shaft, bullet graze on cheek

S2E1- falls out of a tree, in a fight, shot at

S2E2- thrown back in stunt, hanging off building, in a burning building, coughing

S2E5- blinded by flash

S2E6- shocked hand, slapped

S2E8- hit and shoved back

S2E10- moustache ripped off, has guy fall on him

S2E12- glass smashed over head, punched in face

S2E13- briefly restrained

S2E14- in a fight

S2E15- cut by shattered glass, hit in back of head with board

S2E16- beat up, knocked out, shot, in another fight

S2E19- slapped, kicked in the shin

S2E21- hit by door and slapped, punched, hit by door more times, hung from ceiling, pushed into trash compactor, punched

S2E22- falls off short drop

S3E1- wind knocked out of him

S3E3- hit while boxing, knocked down, shot at, bleeding from head, dizzy

S3E5- falls down the stairs, car crash, choked, passes out

S3E7- strangled, severely beaten

S3E9- falls off motorcycle, punched, manhandled, in a fight

S3E11- bullied by his sister

S3E12- pregnancy, labour

S3E13- falls out of spaceship, twists ankle

S3E15- hits knee, shot in the leg

S3E16- thrown into a wall, beat up

S3E17- knocked down, hits head

S3E18- thrown into wall, punched in stomach, punched, hits head, handcuffed, in another fight

S3E19- almost executed, slapped

S3E20- wrestling

S3E22- hit in face, given shock therapy, losing his mind, distress

S4E2- punched in the face, black eye

S4E3- in a fight

S4E4- attacked, tied up, thrown by explosion

S4E5- punched

S4E6- in a fight

S4E7- treated like an animal, put in a cage, shocked, hit with cattle prod, choked, shot with tranquilizer

S4E8- edgy, nightmares

S4E9- in a fight

S4E10- in manacles, hit in the back, exhausted, strangled, hit again, punched

S4E11- punched

S4E12- knocked down, knocked out, manhandled, thrown against wall, punched, black eye, tied up, rope around his neck

S4E14- drunk af

S4E17- headbutted

S4E18- punched in the face

S4E19- pushed against wall, hands around neck, knocked out with a frying pan, chained to bed, jumps out a window

S4E22- pretends to have stomachache

S5E1- smacked in head, in a fight (beat to a pulp)

S5E6- strapped to bed, drugged

S5E7- slapped

S5E9- knocked out, beaten

S5E10- pain in chest

S5E12- punched in the gut

That’s all folks!

[matchupwithshy]

This is a a short story that I'm writing that was inspired by a idea of me simping about Tony Stark.

I was discussing about it with @firedrakegirl so if you want to blame someone blame her.(jk)

It's not complete yet, I don't know if I'll be completing it anytime soon if you want to read it go ahead!

-----------------------------------------

One afternoon a young man was cooking in his mother's kitchen when suddenly he heard a loud bang and the crushing of wood as the house seemed to shake.

Acting as fast as he could he grabbed onto his wheelchair and started to wheel himself out of the kitchen but as he reached the living room he noticed that the roof had caved in, something or someone had crashed through it.

Because lying among the broken plaster and wood was Tony Stark or Iron Man himself. Before the young wheelchair-bound man could try to approach the hero he heard something smash into the living room window.

Soon the air was filled with the sound of broken and crushed glass.

A huge six-to-seven-feet-two-armed alien had just busted through the front window. Landing in a crouch the alien snorted to themselves as they slowly stood up. They glared down at the hero and began to approach with a dark grin on their face.

The young man was scared but he wasn't about to allow a hero that he adored so much to be killed right in front of him.

He didn't care that he knew most likely he wouldn't be able to do anything, the shaking man grabbed ahold of his wheels and pushed himself in front of Iron Man.

Hands trembling he grabbed a hold of the frying pan that he had accidentally placed into his lap, the man pointed it up toward the alien and told the Beast in a fearful voice to not take one more step forward as he the young man would be forced to fight them instead.

The large two-armed alien laughed listening to this shaky displayed little human try to threaten him from his hunt.

As he bent down pushing the pan away slightly with one of his hands he whispered into the human's face *" ... And what exactly are you going to do to me?"*

The young man gritted his teeth and smiled up at the aliens oh so sweetly, he then brought back the pan and with all his might swung as hard as he possibly could smacking the alien upside its head and knocking it over.

With a large thunk, the alien was soon landing on the floor kicking up dust and who knows what else as he landed into the broken window and wood splinters cutting into the alien's skin slowly greenish-blue blood started to leak from below the alien and the beast did not get back up.

Before the young man could try to wheel himself forward and through the destruction, of glass and wood on the floor he heard a cough from behind him.

Feeling slightly scared he raised the pan back up and turned his body around only to see the Forgotten Tony Stark that had been lying on the ground had pushed himself up to look towards the young man that had just saved him.

With a grin on his unmasked face, Iron Man pushed himself up and off the ground to slowly walk toward the youthful male. Stepping over broken wood and glass Tony soon stood in front of the wheelchaired male and the younger man stared up at him with a blush dusting across his cheeks.