#slytherpuff squad

[slytherpuff-squad-goals]

Says the Hufflepuff

all food is "guilt free" to me because i love foods and treats and snacks and drinks forever and ever amen

[chubby-maimaki]

Title: I didn't know that I was starving till I tasted you

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Summary: Emily has been in love with Aubrey ever since they met. However, she never found the courage to tell her and it's been eating her alive. The solution to her problem? Writing a song about Aubrey. She hopes that's enough for her to express her feelings and for Aubrey to take the hint.

Inspired by Hailee Steinfeld's song "Starving"

Notes: For @forthosebelow.

I'm obsessed with Starving and as I was listening to it repeatedly, this idea came.

This fic has been in my Google Docs for three weeks. But I thought today was the perfect day to post it.

Why?

Well, because it's my best friend's birthday 🥳 . @forthosebelow is the biggest Hailee and Junksen shipper I know, so this fic is my birthday present to her. 😇

Happy Birthday my Queen. I love you so much ❤️❤️❤️

You can find the story on AO3

[slytherpuff-squad-goals]

Slytherin: Huffle how much pain are you in?

Hufflepuff: Oh just the normal amount.

Slytherin: The normal amount is zero!

Hufflepuff: huh. I didn’t know.

[ridiculously-over-obsessed]

Happy Happy birthday my amazing young sibling! 😍🥰😍🥰🎊🎉

In true older sister fashion, I will annoy you the whole day. And make sure you know how much I love you.

I'm so happy I get to call you a sibling, a best friend, family.

I love love love you

Thank you for being such a light in my life, always listening, always there for me.

I love you G

Big Three forever 💓

Joooo this is so soft 🥺🥺 thank you so so much, I love you so damn much honestly 🥺🥺

You could never annoy me, and I will always be here for you love 🥰🥰

Big Three for liffffffe 💖

[bittercinnabon]

Interaction #72

Person A: oh hey i know that kid, my class helped her dad give her a middle name

Person B: oh? what is her middle name?

Person A: Danger

Person B: . . .

Person B: what

Person A: my sophomore year pre-calc class helped our teacher pick a middle name when she was being born and now her middle name is Danger

(no but seriously, my teacher legit took our advice and the whole school now calls her “baby danger”)

[of-sunshine-and-sea]

It just figured out that my other friend is also small Slytherin. All my friends are little snakes, all of them and I'm a big badger. What the hell what the hell what the-

[slytherpuff-squad-goals]

I feel like this is a Hufflepuff thing.

I think it’s cute that thing humans do when they see a boat pass and the people on the boat wave at them and they wave back. For absolutely no reason. They don’t know each other they’re not trying to communicate anything other than “LOOK! I am on a boat!!! Hello!!!!” “I see you!!!! On the boat!!!! Hello!!!!!!!!!!” in a genuine moment of wholesome human connection and excitement.

[ladydrarry]

The Houses based on my friends

Gryffindor: • "Hey guys look what I can do" • dances and sings a lot unconsciously • has weird hairstyles • mood swings • leaves essays until the night before • mega ultra super nerd Ravenclaw: • finds really stupid things funny • spends lots of time on social media • says please and thank you all the time • loves pillows • amazing eyebrows • uses a candy wrapper for bookmark Hufflepuff: • wears bows in hair everyday • physically cannot be angry • tries to scare everyone and fails • very affectionate • walks on tip-toes • blushes uncontrollably 24/7 Slytherin: • salty af 100% of the time • swears every other word • killer fashion sense • carries dog around like a baby • really contagious laughter • will challenge anyone at anything

[chubby-maimaki]

G can't control the gay @ridiculously-over-obsessed

[slytherpuff-squad-goals]

How the Houses Handle Quarantine

Ravenclaw: Is fine. Sits in front of the fire reading a good book when not telecommuting.

Griffindor: Spends the time getting in shape in his own house gym, while also making plans to lead work outs with neighbors from their balcony.

Slytherin: Plots the revenge of their enemies while simultaneously reading up on the best ways to get ahead. Creates new spells and potions never seen before.

Hufflepuff: After a day eating snacks and watching movies, wonders when this Quarantine will be lifted because oh my god they can’t handle the lonilness anymore.

[slytherpuff-squad-goals]

Yeah she is.  She was the greatest Head of House. Even a Huffle can admit that.

Insp

[ridiculously-over-obsessed]

Are you into... Nef's kinks?

My brain mates kinks are my kinks

ask me “are you into ____” and I’ll say yes or no

[slytherin-and-hufflepuff-in-life]

The squad in cinema

Hufflepuff n' Slytherin: *giggling like high*

Slytherpuff: *sitting with straight face*

[slytherpuff-squad-goals]

Those times when Winnie the Pooh is a closet Hufflepuff. Hi just give me food and I’ll be fine.

Those time when you’re coworker offers the chocolate, you know you can’t take it because it isn’t hers to give. Then she brings up cold cut apples from the fridge, and it settles your mood.

#relatable 

[ladydrarry]

Hufflepuffs are supposed to be good finders but my best friend just lost her phone for the third time today

[weshouldbebros]

House crossovers imo

Gryffinpuff

-Probably used to taking care of everyone and their shit (but still a bit too irresponsible to be the “mom friend”)

-Probably burned the cake they made on a whim, but they iced the shit out of it so it’s probably fine

-Surprisingly not afraid of most things, and will hold your hand on the roller coaster or kill the spider in the bathroom if you ask them nicely (or they pity you and your average person fears)

-Manages to convince you to join them on all their social occasions, even when you know they’re probs gonna ditch you accidentally (as they’re usually pretty popular)

-Really enjoys spontaneous adventures together that they can cherish and remind you of (or embarrass you with) for the foreseeable future

-Has a painfully stubborn savior complex that will definitely get them into hot water until they start to become picky about the company they keep

Gryffinclaw

-Will NEVER cease to challenge you (and thus themselves) until you agree to a duel of some kind (Mortal Komat, competitive trivia, puns,etc)

-Loves intellectual debates that can go into the night (and will fight you even when they know they’re wrong)

-Forgets to eat and shower sometimes when they get busy/interested with something, but will always make time for the things/people that matter to them (you may have to help them remember their self-care is just as important)

-Dominates the aux cord in the car, regardless of if they’re driving, to exemplify their exquisite music taste bc everyone NEEDS to know this band or obscure artist (and it is probs something you’ve never heard before)

-Is probably really involved with activism and has opinions copious enough to fill a stadium, but still manage to make safe spaces for people to speak for themselves

-DEFINITELY has a compulsive need to buy books for their expansive library but procrastinates to read them when there is perfectly decent fanfiction, fanart, and fanbloggs to keep them occupied (or obligatory work to be done)

Slytherdor

-Has a really put-together life and resume and has everyone convinced they’re an invincible bad ass bitch (and they 100% are), but cries as a daily night time ritual

-Enjoys a good roast to show affection

-Has a problem admitting they need help sometimes, and hate the fact that they can’t do absolutely everything themselves (and they probably can tbh but that doesn’t mean they always should). Is open to collaborative work, though, if they trust you’re committed and that your help is actually helpful 

-Will give the best advice when you’re going through hard life shit, and if they can’t figure out how to directly help make your life better they’ll make sure you’ve got company in your misery

-Partakes in a healthy amount of leisure/labor time, bc they’re equally as lazy as they are ambitious. Schedules in self-care on the calendar, takes needed rest, and doesn’t shy away from earned indulgence

-Is most dangerous when bored and aimless (left to their own devices)

Ravenpuff

-Probably the diplomat who settles arguments with equal parts fairness and reason (sometimes relied upon too heavily for arbitration and peacemaking), and can find themselves uncomfortable with their own anger and avenging their own situations because of this reputation 

-Is an Idealist but is also a realist, and has probably had a crisis about which camp they should set their stakes in to make the world a better place (openly acknowledges it’s a shit draw, let’s not play around)

-Experiences shame for liking “basic” things, that are sometimes even “problematic,” and not always challenging themselves with more scholarly/ enlightened pursuits (but acknowledges that shame is a public emotion and is perfectly content being basic from the privacy of their own home)

-Has hidden diaries somewhere, and they’re definitely filled with cringry poetry  and other people’s secrets they’ve collected over the years

-Baking is a form of worship, the kitchen is their temple 

-Is a lot more witty on their own than in a group setting (they only want a select few to know how powerful their opinions are and what they can do with them)

Slytherpuff

- Has this weird hang up about showing people how hard they work to accomplish their goals (probs bc they’d have to acknowledge how much they care) 

-REALLY loves collaboration and doing things with their “squad” bc they love unity and fraternity and they probably say shit like “teamwork makes the dream work” unironically

-Excelles at customer service bc they’ve spent their whole lives getting to know how people work/how to manipulate a situation to a desired result (also v good a job interviews and dates for the same reason)

-Certified bullshitters who know how to work with what they’ve got and still manage to be better than you

-Judgmental as hickety heck, but tries to hide it (and may furthermore judge themselves for being stubborn about what they perceive). They have pretty high standards and pass everything and everyone through that lense

-Fluid af and probably bi

Slytherclaw

-Will be the most efficient in helping you organize and prioritize your life, bc they’re excellent problem solvers, but don’t always know how to help themselves (unless they can make the “mom friend override” work backwards)

-SUCCESS AMNESIA is alive and thriving inside their sad little serotonin deficient brains, despite how much “potential” they’re told they have

-Seem a lot more open than they really are bc they like talking about experiences and the human condition, but you don’t get to see their pain or emotions in detail

-Reciprocity is their love language and probably the only way you’ll get them to like or respect you

-AGGRESSIVELY subscribes to the “illusion of asymmetrical insight” (think they know themselves and everyone else BETTER than others know them or themselves)--and thrive in the fact that they’re self-aware (pretentious *cough*) enough to know what the theory means in the first place

-”Perfectionist” is a slur (but probably warranted)