#since 2014 actually
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soo i have an ao3 now :)
#[ important ]#i mean. i always had jt#it#since 2014 actually#and i havent taken a look at those bookmarks in years#but i finally decided to post my works there!#ill be reposting some of my works there#so go take a look if you want :)#this is spiraled by me finally making progress in my law fics#and wanting to post them in ao3 to make them more legible#since its going to be multi chaptered#and tumblr links sometimes dont work#so yeah#long rant oops
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Happy 10th birthday to Cercerion!
OUGHHH UR RIGHT CERCIE IS 10 YEARS OLD NOW !!!!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY BOY BELOVEDEST DID NOTHING WRONG EVER IN HIS WHOLE LIFE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#ALSO IM RLY HAPPY HIS OLD DESIGN IS NOW MUCH OLDER THAN HIS FIRST DESIGN WOAH!!!!!!#since i drew the old one SO MUCH back in 2014 i remembered it as being so super prevalent. that when i changed his head shape a couple year#it took a while to get used to the not boxy head but god it was so much more fun to draw the beak. and now its the standard#and it makes me rly happy fr fr. i actually thought i changed his design like only 2 years ago but it was SIX YEARS WHAT!! HOW TIME FLIES..#ask#cercerion#SORRY I JJST WANTED TO REPOST ALL OF THESE#omg dude this also means u and i have known each other for 10 years thats CRAZY#this photoset is so funny its like he went from being :D to being >:U over the years but i assure you now hes more chill than before#HIS COLORS HAVE NOT CHANGED FOR EIGHT YEARS ALSO WHATTTTT i just chose the perfect hues forever#sobbing and crying i love this guy so much#i dont show him online a lot or at least i didnt as muhc until recently but hes always in my brain#cercerion may as well be a part of my soul at this point#HAPPYU TENTH BIRTHDAY CERCIE I LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLOWING KISSES INTO A HURRICANE FOR U#windyart#sure ill put it in my tag. this is literally my art
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day 129
so was anybody going to tell me @adorkastock had their own random pose generator now or was i just supposed to find that out on my own
#day 129#year 5#aradia megido#homestuck#so hey genuinely i think adorkastock taught me to draw???#well among other things obviously. BUT.#in high school when i was just starting to like. understand anatomy as skill that i could Actively Practice#instead of just drawing whatever the hell i wanted and hoping it looked okay#i spent entire art classes just TEARING thru their deviantart page and drawing my blorbos in the poses i found#because my art teacher didnt know what to do with me since i was blowing through all the regular assignments WAY too fast#so she really just let me go nuts#and this was still homestuck mind you. like. it was 2013-2014 i was very much in the rabbit hole already#so fundamentally i have changed as a person in the last decade but also no i havent#ANYWAY it was adorkastock and line of action that basically got me Actually Improving at art at that point. cant recommend them enough trul
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I owe you everything, Scully, and you owe me nothing.
Acrylic on canvas, A3
#so fun fact this is the first physical-painting portrait I’ve done since 2014#I started doing this piece digitally a year and a half ago. and after something like 14 hours of tracked time and only getting about ¼ of it#done. I went ‘this would look so much better as a traditional painting’#and then it took me a year and a half to go and buy the canvas. and another month to actually build up the courage to paint it.#but I’m so glad that I did#I kind of wish I’d done it A2 tbh#I think that would have been even cooler.#but I don’t actually have space to hang it as it is so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#my art#txf fanart#xf fanart#msr#msr fanart#fox mulder#dana scully#txf#the x files#x files#david duchovny#gillian anderson#fight the future#txf ftf
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honestly I've never seen the appealing in solavellan
but Solas x Rook???
yeah. yeah I think I can do it
#too bad that my Rook wants to obliterate Solas from existence😔#“and i suppose i had you” SHUT UP MAN HOLY SHIT THERE'S NO POSSIBILITY I'M HERE TO SHIP YOU WITH ROOK#(solas x human who keeps questioning him my beloved since 2014 actually)#dragon age speculation#dragon age spoilers#dragon age veilgaurd spoilers#dragon age the veilgaurd spoilers#davg spoilers#dav spoilers#da4 spoilers#solas spoilers#i think at least??#There's no spoiler in the post but I tagged it just to be safe#meria#solas x rook
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both my cat and my current relationship are exactly the age of Veilguard Development. That's crazy bro
#slightly older actually but same year! both chichi and me and beanie's first kiss happened in march 2014#and then inquisition and then The Wait. we've lived so many lives since lmao#10 years down to 10 days baby let's go#text
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The Deca itself amazes me, but its fandom is on a whole other level. We have one canon source material (and a few other mentions scattered throughout the Whoniverse), but the fans have managed to tinker with it so much that fanon is actually more popular than canon and more wildly accepted. And I love y'all for it
#doctor who eu#the deca#i don't think there's any mention on the book about Millennia having blue hair? not as far as i recall#and yet everyone agrees that she has blue hair#this little corner of the doctor who fandom is absolutely incredible. my favorite little corner#this post came to me while i was in the shower planning on how i'm going to write my next deca fic#it's been about TWO WHOLE YEARS since i had the idea but i can't pick the right beginning for the story#i think i have a good one now. but i haven't made a lot of progress#is the who tops my one hit wonder? lmao#(not a hit but it's the story i'm most proud of so)#but seriously i have been a deca enjoyer for years ever since i found it which was like in 2014 i think? idk#and i only read the book a few years later and i was like.... “oh. so we made up all the cool stuff about them”#divided loyalties is a good book actually but the fandom made the deca more fun let's all be honest
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hey dad so when i was ten years old and i told you that i'd gotten tired of romance plotlines in books and you told me that i'd be interested in them when i got older. i just want you to know that i was right
#might've been younger than ten even but it was thereabouts haha#i remember. standing on the driveway. complaining about romantic plotlines. hearing that i'd like them again when i was older.#pressing x to doubt. and now here i am#sometimes i wonder if being aromantic has made me more averse to romantic stuff just by virtue of like. conditioning myself into it#but no actually... this is one of those times where i Have been this way since childhood... openly and actively...#it's never made sense to me. never been super compelling to me. never been my thing. never really wanted that never longed for that.#you'd say 'imagine your wedding' and i would be planning my cool 2014-era tumblr doctor who wedding dress if i Had to plan smth#forgetting that you're maybe supposed to have like. a groom.#anyway dskfjghds#talking#aromantic#aromanticism#arospec#aroace#aro positivity
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Hello Dhmis fandom, I’ll just leave this here. Okay bye!
#dhmis#I’ve been in this fandom since 2014 and never posted#so hi I guess!#also I gave him back his tie#why does it vanish so much in the actual video#dont hug me im scared#fanart#tony dhmis#tony the talking clock#dhmis fanart
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2023 Monaco Grand Prix - Fernando Alonso(ft. Max Verstappen & Esteban Ocon)
#guys i have a pet peeve#with nando specifically people have this habit of being like 'oh god podium with [driver he had past drama with] its gonna be rancid'#and then...it's perfectly fine and actually most times ends up very pleasant and cute#like this podium especially#but then all 3 of them are pretty cute with each other!!!#its always so funny how tiny fernando is compared to esteban hahaha#anyways not my fav race in the world im a little sad but p2!!! first p2 since 2014!!!!#and as they said in his post race radio this is just another step forward to winning a race!!!#so i shall see you next wk at his home race hopeful as always#(i dont know actually if catalunya is suited to the amr i dont think so but im hoping for a podium as always)#fernando alonso#fa14#max verstappen#mv1#esteban ocon#f1#formula 1#formula one#2023 monaco gp#2023 monaco grand prix#we do a little bit of f1
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every year ppl on tumblr and twitter ppl are like no trivial pride discourse im serious guys :( and then day 1 of june they miss being at each other’s throats and rehash decade+ online arguments anyway
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🎉🎉🎉10 YEARS OF TOUHOU PROJECT!!!!🎉🎉🎉
how it all started...
#touhou#touhou project#10th anniversary#of being a fan#since 2014#i'm doing this more than a month late#I actually got into this series in Aug 2014#relatable (for th fans)#does anyone even member Kinema Kan#or all those music circles that posted mv's of their covers#what ever happened to them?? i miss them...
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look I’m not going to argue that Edward truly loved Kristen for who she was genuinely ( he didn’t ) but seeing him as someone who got over her death and it barely affected him is kinda a reading I can’t agree with at all
I know what scene started this reading it was the whole “actually I do enjoy hurting people this is my true self and I greatly thank Kristen for making me reach my potential” but that realization came from when he cut her up, no? When you go back to THAT SCENE he describes how the light vanishing from her eyes was beautiful. This means two things, one, he had to first known he was hurting her, and two he was enjoying that fact
WHEN YOU GO BACK TO THE SCENE WHERE HE KILLED HER THERES NO TRACE OF THIS IN THE ACTING THERE!!!!! He’s not even angry he’s more so desperate to explain himself, he even smiles as he tells her he loves her and would NEVER HURT HER! And when he realized he killed her he sobbed himself to the point of blacking out. Even if you brush off the fact riddler is very poorly written and just make it be ed the fact he blacked out and went out fucking around with her corpse while not remembering any of it and only hours later regained consciousness and now having to search around the gcpd to find her. Genuinely why should I believe a man, who consistently convinces himself he’s actually super smart and has no emotions is telling ME the truth here about his own feelings when I as the viewer have just witnessed things that contradict this!!!!
Also the show contradicts that whole motive like two episodes later!!!!!!!!!! When Oswald tried to kill Ed for saying his mother made him weak Edward discusses Kristen’s death and says love wasn’t meant for men like them and that it will always weaken them. Notice how different of a explaination that is to the one in the woods? The one in the woods basically says it was his true self leaking out and he actually had some awareness of what he was doing and he enjoyed every second of it and he feels no remorse. The one during this scene says that it was unavoidable, an accident, but actually him brushing over his feelings and forcing himself to not think about it or ever attempt to love again is the correct awnser. Doesn’t the second answer flow better with the actual death? It aligns exactly with both his narcissism making him unable to admit he was in the wrong and also unable to let him grieve since it would go against the idea he has of himself in his head and aligns with the fact it was a ACCIDENT WHERE HE DIDNT EVEN INTEND TO HURT HER AT ALL!!!
I can’t blame people for taking the whole actually I enjoyed it reasoning as the true one since Gotham is very very badly written but the reasoning he gave to Oswald works better for his character and for the event itself! The whole point of that death was you can hurt people without even trying to and not be able to see that ur acting like the people who have hurt them before it’s too late and that’s!!!! Powerful but Gotham just had to make Edward secretly evil and sadicist this whole time which takes away from that message. The first time he finally realizes Kristen was a person who existed outside of what he thought of and was capable of thinking and acting outside of his image of her was when she died, and he pushed her back into a fucking box, a fucking role she played to further him in his life because the mere horror of his actions were too hard to bare, he had to convince himself this would always happen and it was either of their flaunts to keep his ego intact.
not to mention how the whole denying he needs love in his life kinda relates heavily back to his npd too. Since he couldn’t get what he wants he feels terrible and then convinces himself that actually WHAT HE WANTED was the inadequate thing instead of him, so he doesn’t have to mourn the fact that he couldn’t have it. It’s projection in a way, he projects his inner wants and desires that he hates to others so he can mock them and feel better. He is telling himself he doesn’t need connection to others, that he can provide for himself and will never need or depend on anyone ever in his life again which is contradicted again and again in the show. He can’t stop needing people to like him, affirm him or to depend on them. That is the ultimate paradox with npd, narcissism in itself locks someone into a state of both being completely independent and not needing or caring for others while completely needing and depending on their praise so you can keep your self esteem intact
i think why I’m kinda quite against this reading of Edward as someone who intensely enjoys hurting others in his nature and is completely logical and almost unemotional in his action is because it kinda just falls into his lie he folds himself and others, it’s believing in the narcissist fantasy he has convinced himself and others around him to be true, he will never be that, no matter how hard he tries he will never be smart enough and unemotional enough for himself, he will chase proving that fantasy until he dies if he keeps doing this, taking anyone who comes in his way down with him
you can read Gotham Ed however you want idc I’m not ur mom and I’m not mad I just really wanted to explain myself since last time I tried to it was horrid and nonsensical I should’ve been executed on the spot. You can read Edward however you like I’m not thought police I just really needed to say my peace here
#gotham#edward nygma#rambles#character study#gotham fox#gotham 2014#do not take this post as a actually Kristen was the one who did something wrong I literally make her cheat on this fucker in my rewrite#I just don’t like people making Edward clearly evil here it’s quite clear in the show he’s kinda intended to have psychosis in a way#hes not mentally stable and logical with his actions is what I’m saying here DO NOT BELIEVE HIS LIES!!!!#this post is also a sneak geek out about npd since I find it really really interesting it’s a personal hell someone puts themselves in#and they often aren’t even aware they suffer and burn in it#I have a lot of appreciation for self aware narcissists who are trying to get better it’s a hard disorder to live with#NURSE HES OUT AGAIN
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The show has popped off in a Really big way the last two episodes. Like, taking a critical lens to the series, season one was rushed but it got the job done and introduced the concept characters and major conflicts and had a lot of good moments with characters even if they were quick. That was all pretty clearly a result of them having to do rewrites when they had two episodes cut last minute.
But season two is just plain out Good, and with recent developments, it’s heading towards fucking amazing. The first couple episodes were slower to start but very good thematically, and the last two have, as far as I’m concerned, been off the wall bangers.
Like we are In it shit is happening This is the wheel of time. Before these two episodes I have been enjoying the show yes very much, but the last two episodes have made me the same level of Insane about this series as I was when I read the books a dozen times as a teenager.
The acting? Sharp as a tack. Character beats? Fucking showstopping, starting with Nynaeve’s accepted test through the most recent episode’s introduction of Aviendha.
And obviously, episode 2x04 daughter of the night you will always be famous. Lanfear changed the fucking game here, now that the forsaken are Really out to play this shit is absolutely going places.
The forsaken, the aiel, the seanchan, the aes sedai, the costumes, the sets, THE MUSIC, it is all working so well.
They’ve focused individual episodes on consecutive main characters and I cannot fucking WAIT for whatever they have in store for Mat, since his screen time has been sparing so far (other than the god tier decision to have him team up with Min, that was the first choice that made really go ‘oh this season is On to something here) it is Gonna Be Good. AND Siuan, she’s in the next episode I think???? I hope the last three episodes can keep up this momentum I am Absolutely psyched for the rest.
#obviously the hyperfixation is in full swing at this point it’s all wot up here all the time#think I’m gonna actually reread the series for the first time since 2014 I’m feeling Motivated#also I maintain that the decision to kill Uno was a good one it threw expectations up in the air I’m into it#wheel of time#wot show#wot show spoilers#wot#wot on prime#Caitie speaks
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omf i used to follow you (on twitter...? maybe) like 3yrs ago. glad youre still out there drawing women
we meet again so you can see how my woman drawing has flourished in the last 3 years
#i only started posting art online in 2019 so when ppl have come to me like omg were you x in 2014 im like most definitely Not#that was almost my automatic reaction here but then i was like wait...i WAS posting 3 years ago. time is fake#actually thats a lie ill tell you a story right here in these tags i used to be sooo afraid of posting art online#i thought people would instantly be like this is so bad kys#but one time when i was into bnha (lol) yrs ago i posted my art in reddit since it seemed anon enough#and people were so kind...i was so surprised#it still took me a couple years afterwards to start posting my art on twitter though
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I have genuinely hated almost everything about the internet for about a decade now. Why am I still here?!!
#It's so bad for my mental health a lot of the time#not to mention that social media doesn't even have any pluses that I can see anymore#I miss the blogger era#like pre-influencer#when people just had blogs to share their thoughts on stuff#and their art#Or like back in LiveJournal days or even really early Tumblr era when there was actual community online#the free sharing of art - writing - and ideas#I have friends I made online in 2008#that I still talk to#fairly regularly#but like of all the people I met online from about 2014 onwards#I'm only still regularly in touch with a couple#and I don't even socialize with people#or contribute creatively online any more#and really haven't since about 2017#the whole culture of the internet has drastically changed#hell even google doesn't work anymore because of stupid AI#like honestly#why am I still here?#habit I guess...
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