#simply divine harlequin

[throwaway-settings]

“Painted in 1991, Kerry James Marshall’s Nat-Shango (Thunder) is a pivotal early example of the powerful and poignant paintings that have propelled the artist to become one of the most important and insightful chroniclers in contemporary art. Depicting the story of Nat Turner, a Virginia preacher who led a rebellion of his fellow enslaved people in 1831, with this work Marshall confronts a challenging moment in American history with dexterity and intelligence. Best known for confronting head on the lack of the Black narrative in the art historical canon, his richly configured paintings weave together multiple layers of the lived Black experience, referencing figures from African culture, the lives of enslaved Africans, the later civil rights movement, and the contemporary Black diaspora. During his more than forty-year career as both an artist and a teacher, Marshall has influenced generations of young artists, and—arguably—has been responsible for the emergence of Black figurative painting as the dominant artistic movement of the new century.

In Nat-Shango (Thunder), the life-sized figure of a man is positioned front and center, brandishing an axe in his right hand, and pointing with the axe in his left hand to the distant farmhouse. He has the stance of a man who is on the brink of his own destiny, and who is about to embark on a course of action—that while not knowing the exact outcome—does know that it will change history. Dressed in a pale shirt and a pair of tattered pants, he is located barefoot next to the remains of a once mighty tree, its stump perhaps a metaphor for entire generations of enslaved people not reaching their potential. Scattered throughout the composition are a collaged assembly of enigmatic heads, a series of portraits of young white women taken from the covers of the popular Harlequin novels that were consumed in their millions for their tales of young women in search of true love in the arms of a tall dark stranger; in such close proximity to the figure of Nat Turner, these two motifs confront issues regarding beauty, race and sexuality.

The whole scene is bathed in a rich twilight (provided by the solar eclipse that Turner thought was a sign from God to begin his rebellion, and shown over his left arm), saturating both the deep blue sky and lush green fields with an eerie luminosity; this dawning light on the horizon a symbolic indication of the new day, and the change that it will herald. This verdant setting, complete with its pristine white farmhouse surrounded by picket fencing, strangely at odds with the lived experience of many of the enslaved people forced to work the land.

This painting is Marshall’s re-telling of the story of Nat Turner, an enslaved man who was hanged in 1831 for leading an insurrection that resulted in the deaths of approximately 60 white people. The ensuing retaliation by the local militia and other groups killed at least 100 enslaved people and free Blacks, before local laws were passed outlawing the practice. Turner believed he had been divinely chosen to lead his congregation out of bondage, but “Turner’s Rebellion,” as it became known, led to increased restrictions for the Black population. Nonetheless, Turner was regarded as a martyred hero by many, and an inspiration to generations of others who followed. However, unlike most traditional history paintings, Marshall’s is not simply a retelling—albeit, a heavily nuanced one—of the past. By imbuing the painting with multiple layers of history it reflects the complex nature of the debate surrounding race, one which still resonates as much today as it did in the nineteenth century, and perhaps even more so.

By giving this work the title Nat-Shango (Thunder), Marshall includes another important component of the Black experience, that of the shared African heritage. The title is a reference to the Orisha of Thunder, Fire, and Storms, an important figure in the Yoruba pantheon of Orisha spirits. As well as being associated with drums, masculinity, war, wealth and strength, Shango was also a mortal warlord king of the Oyo Empire, before dying and transcending into the heavens to become a orisha. Yoruba religious beliefs were part of the complex litany of songs, histories, stories, and other cultural engagements that traveled with the enslaved peoples of west Africa on their journey to the New World and, for many remained an important, if concealed, part of their personal everyday culture.

Throughout his career, Kerry James Marshall has sought to redress the lack of visibility of the Black figure in the art historical canon. One of his earliest paintings to receive critical acclaim was Portrait of the Artist as a Shadow of His Former Self (1980), his first to feature a Black figure and a dramatic departure from his previous work with collage. It was created primarily in shades of black and depicts the bust of a man with a large white smile and gapped teeth; the work is now in the permanent collection of the Los Angeles County Museum of Modern Art (LACMA). Although working with this theme for the past forty years, his championing of the Black figure remains especially pertinent today. Many of the current generation of critically acclaimed artists who are contributing to the contemporary debate about race and identity, are only doing so because of Marshall’s earlier inquiries; Jordan Casteel’s depiction of the chromatic richness of Black skin, to take just one example, can be seen to be in direct dialogue with Marshall’s monochromatic renderings. It is Marshall’s lived experience, and that of his forebears, that has shaped his worldview, and which led him to produce work that reflects the social and political reality of Black America. "You can't be born in Birmingham, Alabama, in 1955 and not feel like you've got some kind of social responsibility" Marshall has explained, "You can't move to Watts [in Los Angeles] in 1963 and grow up in South Central near the Black Panthers' headquarters and see the kinds of things I saw in my developmental years and not speak about it" (K. J. Marshall and D. Smith in Conversation, quoted in Along The Way, Kerry James Marshall, exh. cat., London, 2005, p. 17). It is with paintings such as Nat-Shango (Thunder) that Marshall has not only played his own important role in recontextualizing the debate surrounding race, but has also enabled a new, younger, and perhaps more vociferous, generation to make their own voices heard in shaping the present critical inflection point in American history.”

from https://www.christies.com/en/lot/lot-6316970

Kerry James Marshall, Nat Shango (Thunder), acrylic, collage, found material on canvas, 55″x 78″, 1991

[bunimalsfiberdolls]

[zozie-brown]

Rune is sporting some shiny new sunglasses. They were too big for the other boys so he was happy to take them off my hands.

[meanae]

Face-up batch! A bunch of SD guys.

[b-yp-nk]

“that’s my boy.” I don’t want to make a habit out of posting my own collection here, among the works-in-progress, but this time I just couldn’t resist.

[eliot-rambles]

So...Having just bought two bodies for floating heads...I’m going to be breaking the 30 completed dolls mark very soon. It doesn’t feel like there’s 29 (even though 18 of them are larger than MSD) dolls in my room atm but there is. 

I have officially become that person with SO MANY DOLLS that I never really thought I’d be. 

[nanshe-of-nina]

Interesting extratcs from The Masochistic Pleasures of Sentimental Literature, re: Elsie Dinsmore:

"To be sure, on the surface Horace’s severity toward Elsie is censured, and eventually he bitterly repents of it and begs God to forgive him. But who is more charismatic and attractive in the Elsie novels? Her stern, abusive father or her future gentle, kind husband, Edward Travilla? Horace’s abusive streak is part of an undercurrent making him appear attractive, not because we love arrogance and cruelty, but because we love power. Like the prototypical male hero in the contemporary Harlequin-type novels Janice Radway discusses, the hero of the Elsie novels must be transformed from a tyrant into a strong and virile crusader for justice. But the initial streak of despotism is the key to his desirability, because it establishes his strength and vitality, which remain part of his permanent psychological profile. Goodness without power is boring. Even before Horace’s change of heart, Finley paves the way for seeing his abusiveness as a sign of attractiveness by linking his severity to God’s severity. It enables us to see in him “the lineaments of the divine Master.” After all, his brother is equally cruel to Elsie, but lacking the allegorical connection to God, Arthur simply comes off as a bully, whereas Horace never does."

"In consolidating this pattern of eroticized paternal violence, Elsie Dinsmore is a masochistic influence upon its young readers, urging them to associate female submission with erotic pleasure. But its masochism may not be completely oppressive. It may indeed foster in female readers an attraction to a man who demonstrates his love and affection in acts of violence and discipline and in male readers a belief that they need to be authoritative in order to be attractive to women. But just because Elsie Dinsmore preaches the ecstasies of informed submission is no reason to think that its readers accepted that message. Indeed, the interplay between the text and a potentially resisting reader authorizes anger as well as passivity. Berliner observes that the desire to express unacceptable anger is one of the principle causes of masochistic behavior: “Suffering is the weapon of the weak and unloved where undisguised aggression is dangerous. The masochistically exhibited suffering excuses the [masochist’s] aggression, partially conceals it, serves its new repression, and disarms retaliation. Masochism is a way of hating without great risk”. Many recent studies of masochism have similarly addressed the way that fantasies of suffering constitute an indirect form of hostility for the person who cannot express anger directly. In the eyes of a just God, the superego, or an implied reader, the victim of unmerited suffering looks blameless and pure, while his or her abuser looks detestable. Projection into that onlooker’s mind affords indirect access to anger, since the onlooker speaks on behalf of the fantasizer, who can remain mute in accordance with social proscriptions against the expression of anger. Relating a case history in support of Berliner’s thesis, psychologist Robert Stoller describes a masochistic female patient who routinely implied that his own behaviors were sadistic, and he realizes that being positioned as sadist made him feel manipulated by her and uncomfortable with what an implied onlooker might make of him. Masochism, he observes, was his patient’s effort to express hostility indirectly."

"This indirect expression of anger toward abusive authorities may well have played an important role in the popularity of the book, enabling readers to feel their own repressed anger toward oppression. And boys, I suspect, could take as much pleasure in that circuitous expression of rage over parental subjection as girls. This is the nasty side of sentimentality, the aspect that rouses the ire of sophisticated readers, who recognize the hypocrisy in its sentimental celebrations of paternal authority and unqualified affirmations of a conservative status quo. But we might also recognize in that hypocrisy a certain, albeit limited, avenue toward agency. Disabled perhaps, by Calvinist prohibitions upon the expression of anger and hostility, the sentimental author found in masochism an indirect avenue toward such expression. And readers anxious to experience release from similar constraints found in masochism the pleasure of venting anger without having to face the causes and the consequences of that anger."

"The use of suffering as a circuitous method of expressing anger does not undermine the argument that Elsie Dinsmore makes paternal violence look attractive; to the contrary, this circular expression of anger reinforces the construction of masochistic desire in the book. In a study of a book that resembles Elsie Dinsmore in this respect, James Machor points out that The Wide, Wide World repeatedly produces a rebellion in the reader’s heart. “How dare Aunt Fortune be so cruel to poor Ellen? How dare John find fault in her?” But as he points out, rebellious thoughts such as these reinforce rather than subvert the dominant message, which is that all people harbor rebellious impulses against God’s law and are in need of the Christian discipline the book advocates. The reader is positioned to say, “If that nearly perfect girl requires discipline—and I see that she does—do I not require even stricter discipline?” The fact that discipline, punishment, and surveillance are rendered so attractive in the book, and the pleasures associated with them are propped onto internal experiences of painful affect, completes the circle. “Indeed I do,” the reader is prompted to think. “In fact, it is my most deeply felt desire.”

[puddin-kun]

[muselexum]

Aria of the Damned

@zahraalgernon​​

What had begun his journey down into the depths, one might wonder. While several meaningful reasons could be provided as answers, the root of his actions were always whims. Every century or so an itch would begin to develop at the back of his skull. Excitement. He needed something to break up the monotony of his existence. Sometimes it was duels with Wrath, sometimes it was drinking the river of wine that flowed through Kuraigana dry, and sometimes, at least it used to be, reading. 

Reading had been one of his favourite pleasures. The library within the walls of his castle was expansive, filled with novels and textbooks that fancied his interests. He had collected every book that was worth reading, and he had read them all multiple times over. There was nothing better than closing himself away and letting time melt into itself as he read through his library. The last several times he had done it though, it did not quite scratch the itch he had. He was beginning to grow disillusioned. Were there truly no worthwhile books any realm had left to offer? It had not been the first time he considered picking up a Harlequin Romance novel simply to satisfy his itch to read something new. The day he lowered himself to read The Greek Tycoon’s Disobedient Bride would also be the day he finally decided to fall on his sword though.

So the itch was back.

The idea had come to his mind one evening as he was reading The Investiture of the Gods for what he believed to be the 374th time. 

He needed to read something new, and there was only one place left that would have something to offer him.

He was aware of the prison, what lay inside its walls and how it came to be so. The divine blade that rest on his back and the cherub that accompanied him on his excursions both came into his possession during the events that had caused it. The prison that entrapped the dragons used to once be their palace, a house of knowledge where they would commune with mortals. Mihawk had recalled visiting it several times himself, though demons had not been particularly favoured guests.

The deeper into the ocean depths he traveled, the more he felt pressure building and compressing his body. He had been submerging further and further down for what had to be several human days. It was no matter. He did not need to use his lungs, and the water’s attempts at crushing him were nothing more than a nuisance. He made note that at a certain depth he had just begun falling, the water doing most of the work in sinking him as the pressure made him more dense. 

Then he heard the screaming. Groans of agony seeping up from the darkness below, warbled by the water that drowned out their cries. The cherub that traveled by his side began to grow uneasy, but followed close behind him nonetheless.

The sounds of despair were his guide, Mihawk using them to navigate the depths until he reached the grand entrance of a place that had once been held in the highest regard. He stood on marble steps, decrepit statues and pillars lay fallen apart around him. It was a palace once so beautiful and magnificent. A shame, really. He held a true reverence for things that were masterfully crafted.

He raised a hand, placing his palm on the gates until they gave way to him, allowing him to enter.

[boop-le-snoot]

Hello! Are you still doing kinktober? If so I'd love a sub loki x reader fic, reader being non binary if that's possible. The s p i c y part is bondage if you are comfortable with it! I just rarely see any sub loki fics, so I'm going to shoot my shot! Thank you so much, have a nice day/evening/night💕

sub!Loki x nb!reader | rope bondage

a/n: you get two drabbles because it turns out I see ropes as being erotic and not sexual so the first one turned out sounding like a harlequin novel with feelings and the second one is considerably more smutty. also enby dom titles are just the coolest!

The blossoms on his wrist were stark white, smelled divine and looked, frankly, pretty. The aroma was subtle and unobtrusive. It reminded him of lighter, brighter days spent chasing butterflies around his mother's gardens, not a care in the nine realms beyond catching bright, beautiful critters.

They noticed his smile threatening to spill. He felt like a cloud, light and floaty.

"Good, good," They smiled at him, encouraging and secretive, placing featherlight kisses along the bare skin of his torso.

Loki's eyes slid shut. His lover's touch was always brief and gentle, like the butterflies when they flapped their wings atop his head. Involuntarily humming began somewhere in his chest, quiet, but too loud for the quiet room.

"Now, you were doing so good," They chastised him, closing their teeth around his nipple and giving it a gentle tug. "Be good to me, pet, and rewards will surely come. Behave."

Loki's legs twitched. Stubborn, he gritted his teeth. The implications behind his lover's soft tone were clear.

Oh, how he loved it. He loved their gentle voice and sharp words. In moments like these, his magic, bound by the golden-glowing ropes criss-crossing his hands, flared, casting an ethereal light on his lover's form.

His submission always had mattered to them more than dumbly chasing a release and leaving them both even more hungry. And Loki submitted willingly, until the butterflies left his insides and danced on his skin, pathways conducted by his love's fingertips. In submission, he was free.

//

The bed frame squeaked pitifully once, twice, but it was not long before the annoying noise was drowned out by a cacophony of choked moans, deep and primal. Loki's eyes were clenched shut so tightly all he saw was white-hot flashes; the noises coming from would have embarrassed him any other day.

But not now and not with them. They played his body like a virtuoso, exposing his strings for all and stroking, stroking, stroking, until the world around him froze and the only thing remaining was the melody of their combined moans and whines.

"Not yet, pet," They clamped a vicious hand around the base of his manhood but the slick glide of the toy inside of him didn't still. It was torture of the sweetest kind.

Loki keened, his body temperature dropping in response. They wound him up so well, his control over his magic began slipping. A noise of distress left him, briefly, and the movement inside of him stopped.

"Don't be afraid, love, I know you want to," Their voice was gentle but Loki made no mistake: it was an order.

"Yes, Your Grace," He growled, feeling the chill seep into his bones and blossom on his azure skin.

"Good pet," They smiled. The toy inside of him began moving again - and it was oh so warm, he was so sensitive, he simply could not help himself.

The restraints around his wrists and ankles glowed, saturated by his magic, but did not give.

[auredosa]

i NEED a one shot of malistaire having a ptsd nightmare about their escape from dragonspyre then sylvia is there to comfort him when he wakes up

thank you for the prompt again, anon! i hope this meets your expectations! enjoy!

wet hands

tw; destruction, war collateral, trauma

Malistaire was tailing his father home from the Command Academy the hour it began.

Whispers of a riot, a coup, an attack had been floating around the mage division as of late. No, not floating, more like crawling up the grape vine and becoming the subject of many late night meetings between the senior members of their branch.

High General Vladan Drake, naturally, was required to be in attendance. At first, Malistaire was worried that the other correspondents wouldn't let him attend-he had a fraction of his father's experience in service, but to his surprise, he was given a seat at the table and even asked for his opinion on occasion.

"Just in case one of us drops dead before this all blows over. You have a youth to tell our story," one of them, a blunt Diviner, had stated.

"We have the crystals for that, Agatha," his father snapped back. "Why shouldn't we use them to keep record of our rendezvous?"

"You saw what happened when those little gems get into the wrong hands." She took a long whiff of her cigar and leaned back into her chair. The smoke smelled to Malistaire of burnt parchment and sandalwood; not something that he'd remotely want wafting in his lungs. "Can't trust anybody these days. One leaked jewel and the upper echelons of society go to-"

"Enough," commanded a third voice. He was seated at the head of the round table, rings of every cut and metal adorning each of his thumbs. "We will not be holding any proof of our meetings on this topic. My superiors are suspicious of us as it is-"

He was about to elaborate further when the crystal goblet before him began to tremble. The drink within started to ripple, then splash onto the table. Malistaire gripped the edge of his chair and looked towards his father.

"What is this, now?" Vladan hissed, looking to the door of the room. "Another experiment of the lower division?"

Suddenly, a frantic knocking sounded at the double doors to the conference room, accompanied by a voice too young to be a late attendee, too old to be one of the servants.

A white haired woman who had yet to speak raised her hand to the deadlock, and the chains fell apart at her will. The doors flew open to reveal a gentleman in harlequin robes, red as a child in the snow. His breaths came out in wild pants, and his fingers gripped his wand as if he were still in battle.

"Mikaeil," the woman greeted stoically. "What is going on?"

"The Titan!” he gasped, struggling to stand up straight. "The Titan is-is here."

"I beg your pardon?" Vladan probed, brows knitting in disbelief. "Tell the full truth, boy!"

"It is the truth!" insisted Mikaeil, rising to full height in the presence of the General. "And you must evacuate at once! The insurgency-"

Another tremor rocked the underground chamber. This time, dust cascaded above their heads. A hairline crack appeared in the stone, before splintering across the ceiling.

“The insurgency has begun,” the woman finished. She finally opened her eyes, revealing glowing ivory pupils which had scried their doom.

"But-" Vladan began, just as a stone column shattered the stone ceiling and appeared like a giant rusty nail in the center of the room.

"I said we leave! Now!" The mage repeated.

They were running. It was difficult to keep pace when the ground wasn't meeting his feet. The thunder and rumble were deafening to his young ears. When they were outside, the sky was blanketed in thick fog. Not fog, Malistaire realized. Smoke and debris from the destruction that had only begun.

"To our airships, general?" The cigar-wielding woman shouted.

"If we can!" Vladan called back. "There's a cargo ship near the commerce district. Meet there!"

As was taught in all schools of battle, it was too dangerous to travel together. While they couldn't quite see their enemy, it was better to assume they had the entire command academy surrounded.

"If this is an attack, then where is-"

A hellish roar tore through the quarter. They all gazed up to the sky, where the crimson, leathery wings beat mercilessly through the smog.

"The Titan . . ." Malistaire muttered in awe. The stench of burnt flesh and ash wafted from above. From the cloud cover, he felt a drop of rain hit his cheek. Placing a finger to his face, he found that it was warm. Blood.

"General!"

Behind them, an ornate pillar gave way. But not just the shattered stone beam. Shards of crumbling white stone, all fashioned into jagged points, were hovering in the air, like knives pointed at a target. Pointed at them.

An unseen puppeteer gave the command, and the pillar came down in unforgiving gravity.

“Father!”

“Malistaire?” came a soft voice beside him.

He gripped the cotton bedsheets in clenched fists. There remained an unyielding tightness in his chest, and sweat gathered on his brow. But the air was different: tinged with morning dew and waxy smoke wafting from the nightside table. The warm glow of an oil lamp filled the room, illuminating their shared bedroom.

No fire. No chaos. No blood raining from the carnage-stained clouds.

Just his wife, staring at him with a familiar concern.

Ah.

It happened again, hadn’t it?

Another nightmare to inconvenience those around him. Some sorry part of him wished he could carve his memories out of his head. The aftermath of this was never pretty. He didn’t need comforting. He didn’t need to recount the days of horror and warfare. It wasn’t as if that would change anything. Those events were singed into his brain like a brand on skin. No theurgist could fix that.

“Apologies,” he muttered, clearing his throat. “I . . . I’m sorry for waking you.”

“No need to say sorry, silly,” assured Sylvia. “It’s really nobody’s fault, you know. The mind can be a horrible foe sometimes.” As if she hadn’t parroted that to his brother too.

She slid off her side of the bed and stretched her arms. Her hair was twisted into unruly tangles, brushed aside to show tired green eyes. Despite her best intentions, he could tell she was tired, too. Now she wouldn’t be able to fall asleep until she had to get up for the day’s work.

“I’m going to make tea,” she yawned. “Raspberry leaf or the stuff from Marleybone?”

“Your call,” Malistaire replied. He was still unnerved by what he’d seen in his subconscious, and anxious about the trouble he was causing her. His throat was too dry to let him offer another apology.

There was nothing to do but stare blankly at the other end of the wall with his racing thoughts. Before he knew it, Sylvia had returned with two teacups of floral refreshment. He made a mental note to thank Arthur for introducing them to this custom.

“Here. Be careful.”

He took his own cup and wrapped his palms around the base, smiling at its fleeting but welcome warmth. Sylvia took her place next to him and they both said nothing for but a moment, quietly partaking in their drinks.

“Same sequence?” She asked once they’d both had a sip.

“Not quite. It . . . this took place earlier, minutes before we arrived in Wizard City.” It was easier to talk about if he treated it like a historical text from a book, not the horrors of his own mind. “It’s as if I’m going through all the motions in reverse, back to the start of it all. The problem is that I don’t think there’s any further to go back to.”

“Well,” Sylvia began, “that’s a good thing, isn’t it? You’ve completely exhausted the entire story, so it can’t get any worse from here.”

“Not necessarily . . .” Malistaire grumbled.

“I know.” She sighed and took another sip of her tea. The conversation always progressed this way. There was little she could do to quell his self-destructive subconscious. As far as either of them knew, there were no spells that took away bad dreams, at least not ones that didn’t require the favor of a fairy or a monetary fee of some sort. Those were simply fiction[SH1] .

“. . . I’m sorry there isn’t more I can do, my heart,” she said sadly, setting her cup on the nightstand. “And I understand that I don’t really understand the things you see in your dreams.”

“Sylvia, don’t bother.” Malistaire grumbled, putting his down as well. “It doesn’t change anything.”

“Exactly,” his wife affirmed. “I’m not going to stop searching for something to make this easier. Dahlia might know something, or maybe a seraph on the Way could-“

“That isn’t what I meant.” He interrupted, more roughly than intended. “We would both know about that, wouldn’t we?”

He scowled at the floor, finally feeling better now that his anxiety was turning into frustration.

“My father and mother have been lost. My brother and I can’t return home because there isn’t one to return to, not even if we wanted. And for all we can do, between the both of us, we can’t bring them back.”

Cracks, shouts, fire, stone, shards.

"General!"

“Ever since then, every night, I am reminded of that, and I despise it.”

“Ah.”

Sylvia’s face was unreadable. It took her a moment to rationalize the horribly charged vent that’d spilled from his mouth. before her face gave way to kind understanding. The corners of her mouth turned up in a wistful smile, and he could only wish he could have her saintly patience.

“You are correct, love. Nothing you said was wrong,” she soothed. “However-“

She scooted closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder. Her graceful hand clasped over his. The messy locks of her hair brushed against his face, daisies and rain under his nose.

“Your wounds are fresh, and they can still heal. Your parents may have passed, but their legacy is not entirely forgotten-thanks to you and your brother,” she added, smiling. “I promised you that I would save as many people as I could, and I know there are so many more, and that there is still so much work to do. So, so much work.”

Three tiny squeezes in the heart of his palm.

“I know it hurts, love. I know you’re tired. But I’m almost certain that one way or another . . .”

A tender kissed pressed to the stubble on his cheek.

“You can always find your way back home.”

[mmmmalo]

Do you have any thoughts on the super popular headcanon transgirl John?

Been pretty resistant to it, since it doesn’t seem to mesh with the idea of John seeking to merge with the image of Dad, which I’ve read as alternately realized in John becoming the Dad of a family unit and in his gay thoughts (for his Dad or others). But the fact that ‘merging with an image’ is an impossibility that requires interpretation to be brought into reality means there are some exploitable cracks in that position, which I’ll try to outline.

An acquaintance of mine once suggested that John’s dabbling in ectobiology (in Mom’s lab robes no less) constitutes appropriation of the feminine – on the grounds that the scifi trope of penis (bearers) creating life without vagina (bearers) should be viewed not simply as an aspiration to a (gender neutral) God-like capacity for emanation, but as a jealousy of the opposite sex. This would be one approach to June – to read the fantasy of reproduction via busting-out-ghosts (ie manbro bukkake theater) as necessitating a desire to embody feminine characteristics, and to proceed from there. 

But I’m also acutely aware that within the confines of heterosexuality, gay thoughts can entail positioning oneself as the opposite gender (in a “i would have to be a girl to like guys!” sort of way) – which is to say, John “i am not a homosexual” Egbert could potentially reconcile that statement with his attraction to men by identifying as a girl (even if that’s in tension with the identification with Dad that’s packaged with the attraction to men?) – but this is not necessarily the case, since depending on the configuration of John’s head, he could just as easily come to the realization that he does /not/ have to be a girl to like guys, and that his statement was a denial.

[Tangential: I read Nedry in Jurassic Park as being gay before (x) on the basis of his loading an embryo (amber mosquito) into a phallic symbol (shaving cream) and later being blinded by bukkake (poison spit), but for similar reasons as the above, I suppose trans woman is also a valid reading]

There’s also the matter of Nanna – that John’s birth entailed her mortal fall from the ladder could imply that John actually sees Nanna as the image from which he is descended (and thus seeks to return to), though this is in tension with moments that imply Dad is highest… likewise, since kernelsprites represent wishes, the existence of Nannasprite swings the pendulum towards identification with the feminine… while John’s association of clowns with Dad swings the pendulum right back again, perhaps suggesting Nannasprite as the reconciliation of the competing ideals. (Perhaps related to how Jane aspires to certain masculinized ideals while still viewing herself as a girl?)

More on that tension: on pages 48-50, John swings from vilifying the aromas of his nemesis Betty Crocker (Dad is actually the one who bakes, so the aromas are actually Fatherly?), to insulting Dad and the associated harlequins, to waxing romantic on transcendent Platonic Forms at the fireplace (above which sits the image of Nanna and her ashes). This is also the moment where John invokes pale fire snatching its light from the sun, which brings us to the Thief of Light.

It’s very interesting that Vriska interrupts a dream in which John nearly re-unites (ie merges) with (the image of) Dad. (And in the subsequent conversation no less, John reads Vriska’s elongation of his name as “June”) Could be related to John discussing how Dad is more of a half-brother than a father, while acknowledging Nanna as the true source? And thus the true target of aspiration.

Also interesting that Vriska acknowledges that John’s session is doomed to fail, in light of her seemingly representing John’s realization that he cannot (or does not want to?) become his father. Her insistence that he should try to win anyway (because winning is the only point of anything) also seems loaded in the context of the parallel discussion of ideals… likewise, John’s insistence that winning is still possible becomes an insistence that dreams CAN come true. Vriska manifests again as John muses on the desecration (and decaptation?) of his Con Air poster, upon which Nic Cage has become a sad clown… which relates to John’s ongoing disillusionment with Dad…? (Finding out that Dad was a boring businessman was a while ago though). Reminds me that the phrasing of ‘reunite with your loving wife and daughter’ can at once represent union with the masculine role of husband AND union with the feminine… so I’m lost again? Very possible that masculine/feminine is just an inadequate dichotomy, but let’s ignore that and press forward.

(I am skipping around re-evaluating the events surrounding conversations with Vriska at this point, since the circumstances of her intro seem to be a pivot)

…in John’s first conversation with Kanaya (after which Vriska manifests for the Remember Me date) is prompted by John preparing to send his gift to Jade, which I don’t know what to make of. However, the conversation dips into a discussion of Contact (need to watch), pivoting on the ambiguous reality of Jodie Foster’s vision of her Dad, which Matthew [horse-noises] has faith in – so we’ve returned to the topic of John musing on his own dreams of Dad, and everything that entails. That reminder is followed by perhaps the most damning exchange:

…which suggests that the applicability of John’s tangent is gender skepticism? But let’s return later to evaluate the resulting Vriska convo – I want to stay linear here. Vriska next manifests as John prepares to kiss Ghost Dad:

…after which Vriska mostly berates John for waiting around and not doing things when he’s supposed to, despite her being the very reason that he is forced to wait. This seems appropriate insofar as union with the Father also represents union with the divine will (in the Stoic sense), to which the Heir of Breath’s openness to suggestion is an end. So the confusion and frustration of Vriska’s orders constitutes an interruption of this fantasy of doing exactly what you’re supposed to do (ie what god/the player tells you to do), which is visually represented by Vriska preventing John from kissing Bill Cosby? I think… though since John’s present objective is to meet up with Nannasprite, I feel like the roles are blurring again… (even more so when Nanna reminds John that he is also sort of HER father)

John’s penchant for playing pranks on the bossy aliens who claim to rule him, submitting disingenuous words for them to repeat, is also a disruption of this supposed order… and/or John’s way of claiming the God-status for himself? Vriska makes the disruption of the way things are ‘supposed to be’ more explicit later when she berates John for initiating a conversation…

Anyway, the rest of this gets very rambly and speculative, so I’m placing it under the cut. Long, incoherent read.

The next “moment” that strikes me spans from 3386 to 3468, from John spotting the Hussie-Rufio kiss in the clouds to Vriska’s giant X-marks-the-spot. Crucially, these moments (emphasizing a father-son kiss and feminine anatomy) are bridged by Seek the Highbl00d – implying that that flash functions as an expression of John’s thoughts, just as Return to the Core was an expression of Jade’s thoughts. What follows is an attempt to make sense of the dream – I expect to fail in some capacity, but I will do my best.

3386: Hussie emphasize that Rufio saw Peter as a father-figure, so Hussie’s attempted revival involve bestowing the breath of life upon a son-figure. SMOOCH! (It bears repeating that the insertion of the divine breath into inert matter also has bearing as John’s self-conception as a video game avatar, animated by a divine will)

3393: The kiss appears in the clouds of Skaia above John, meaning that the thought of being kissed by his Dad is running though his head. He is transfixed by this image (for hours!)

3401: Since the instillation of breath into inert matter is often tinged with traces of necrophilia (corpsesmooch!) WV imbibing shaving cream “like the wind” seems like a euphoria tinged with sensuality, as though John leafing through his Dad’s wallet with a recently conferred sense of responsibility is akin to Terezi falling in red kool-aid (there’s no way he’s not getting off on this)

3410: WV compared buckling himself into the drivers seat to his (imminent) assumption of the title of mayor. The position of driver linked to a role of authority…

3414: …so as John takes off into the sky, we get another peak at the moment that Gamzee first declared himself God, to insinuate John similarly feels like he’s on top of the world. The SBaHJ complements this – John is riding his 4-wheel device into the sky (thus achieving unreal air) up to a cloud labeled clown (which is associated with fatherhood). John feels as though he’s achieved the ideal.

3419: The main takeaway from John’s conversation with Jade for me is that he is anxious about the idea of his Dad marrying Mom (jealousy?) and also anxious about idea of himself getting married… inclined to read this as John getting antsy about some of what (he believes) being an adult man necessarily entails, which here means getting wife. The comment about “a shipping grid made by an alien” strikes me as a tongue-in-cheek jab at heterosexuality as GOD’S PLAN, given John and Karkat’s previous conversation about Superman.

It’s also striking to me that the many of the cloud visions John describes were of Jade, if the idea that the clouds function as internal mirrors holds. I suppose the vision of Jade surrounded by frogs means he’s thinking of reproduction, even before he brings of romance… and Jade worrying about if the frogs are going in a cauldron is interesting, considering her infanticide motifs…anyway,

3420: John commented about discomfort at the Crosby tops blinking at the beginning of the Jade convo, and now that it’s staring me in the face I feel compelled to contend with it. I think… it’s sort of a call back to page 1, with John blinking and staring directly at the camera. The moment of locking eyes across the forth wall – the moment orders started entering the command prompt, the moment union with God (the player) started. I’m not sure if, looking at that blinking computer, John regards himself as the player or the played.

Anyway, Karkat has manifested, and he is terrified of Gamzee – John asks him what’s up, which in context of the above is a haunting echo of Gamzee’s first line, which then too functioned as a questioning of the nature of hierarchy. (“What /is/ up? What is authority? What is divinity?” - you have to read it literally) John makes WV stop honking the car in response to Karkat’s mortal terror of honking – not sure if this means John is the Gamzee figure, all the car beeps triumphant honks upon having ascended to the domineering position of godhood, or if John is Karkat here, experiencing terror of the various potentials of his ascension. Perhaps both, perhaps neither. Moving on…

3422: John contacts Karkat (again, reversing the way that trolling is “supposed” to work… I think John is the only kid to initiate contact pre-act 6?)… but otherwise I’m not getting a lot out of this conversation. The panel though, I will note, uses the arrangement of clouds from 4 panels prior to emphasize that John is heading towards and unseen castle. After the upcoming sequence, he will crash into a tree… suggesting that Seek the Highbl00d represents an end to whatever high John’s currently on?

3427: Karkat just took a fall down some stairs in response to the terror of a honk… which places him squarely on Earth instead of Heaven… (important only insofar as it establishes Gamzee as high and Karkat as low, for the purposes of this scene). Terezi manifests, poorly attempting to hide her excitement about murder (which makes sense, since murder!Gamzee originally manifested for Karkat?). This implies that Karkat’s own terror is accompanied by titillation… and retroactively means that John’s anxiety about sex masks an excitement that he regards as unbecoming?

Then Terezi honks – ostensibly, because Gamzee has claimed her glasses (leading Karkat/us to believe she has been killed). But the appearance that Terezi honked is perhaps equally important…? It’s as though the enthusiasm for murder which Gamzee presently embodies has possessed her, as she kissed Tavros’s corpse? (Worth noting that the depiction of her corpse-smooch directly preceded the Hussie-Rufio kiss, which John responds to by… getting in the car and honking a bunch, as he approaches the sky-image of a megalomaniacal Gamzee?)

3431: Things are getting weird now, and I’m starting to lose my grip on how this all relates to John. Quoth Equius, “Are you saying the highb100d has finally embraced his position atop the hierarchy” (in response to happy Gamzee murder times) – which in context suggests that this is well within what John considers the tyrannical rights of a father, somehow. Or of a God, I suppose – whatever you wanna call that-which-occupies-the-highest-rung….

Also, seeing as Karkat is manifesting for Equius, Karkat asking if Equius is still strong means Equius is questioning his own strength… why? The only context we get is that he is looking at Nepeta, and is somehow enmeshed in Egbert’s psychodrama…

CG: THE POINT IS, IF YOU SEE HIM, WOULD YOU MIND SNAPPING HIS STUPID WAND IN HALF OR SOMETHING? CG: AND THEN CHOKE HIM TO DEATH WITH HIS OWN SHITTY PRETENTIOUS SCARF.

Weird future-echoes of Equius’s death in Karkat’s words… the motif of Breath is definitely significant, seeing as the transmission of the animating breath of life is the key act of God here, and thus representative of total domination…? Whereas choking the breath out of someone would mean…?

I’m getting ahead of myself, perhaps.

CG: JUST DO WHAT I SAY, OK. CT: D –> I will 100k into it

An ominous note to end on, given that Equius’s willingness to combat orders from above is part of his conflict here.. but also, because of the motifs of self-alienation, orders from above /includes/ orders from within (ie urges)…? Or should I consider those at odds, in an id/super-ego kind of way? God I’m confused

3437: All I’ve gathered from Terezi’s proceedings  here (which lead into Seek the Highbl00d) is that she is projecting all of her concepts of criminal debauchery onto Vriska – which you could compare to all the absurd clown theatrics that John used to project onto Dad, but there’s no particular reason to privilege that at the moment…

I will admit that John’s fear of disillusionment (of the collapse of the ideal, the fall from the Pleroma to Earth) is giving me some confirmation bias which may be clouding/guiding my appraisal of the proceedings. I will try to remain openminded.

3438 (Seek the Highbl00d): Oh boy here we go

This is… something? Cats are a child symbol, so to call someone feline-obsessed is to call them baby crazy (see: Roxy). Earlier, John was “joking” about a desire to sink the Mom-Dad ship – and later, Bec Noir’s murder of Mom and Dad realizes the fantasy (Noir’s bloody footprints lead Rose to John, further implicating him as source). If Equius and Nepeta are doing parodies of eachother’s masculinity/femininity here, only to be brutally killed, could this be regarded as precursor…? But the deaths themselves bear no resemblance at all…

I guess the idea of Dad having Equius’s attitude of being SO PROUD that his son has finally decided to kill him for supremacy is funny to me (even more so, but I’m not sure that it checks out…

…okay, when Nepeta is checking out her shipping wall she emphasizes the role reversal in Karkat Gamzee so I guess that’s our focus here?

…for Nepeta to enter the grate placed along the wall of ships makes it as though she entering the wall, the unreal place where all the possible union are true? Or that could just be where the grate is

…Kanaya sliced the left most transportalizer, which prevents her from being followed, but also from going back where she came from. Gamzee’s “miracles” imply a child-like state of blissful ignorance – the announcement of a miracle at this juncture, along with Nepeta travel in the direction that Kanaya has marked as impossible, make it seem as though Nepeta is going into the past…? So the horror of what Nepeta sees in the final grate should reflect a (possibly falsified) rendition of the past?

…likewise the arrow fired into the chessman’s eyes seems to suggest being blinded by the light (also the motif with Rose jabbing her ogre’s eyes out), hinting that some horrible truth lies ahead.

The truth being that, like Equius, John finds joy not in domination but submission? Or the reverse, if Gamzee is the figure of identification…? Or if this is truly a look into the past, this would be how John has come to regard his own relationship with Dad? As brutal subjugation, and forced deference? Which he has nonetheless come to fetishize (as per Equius’s ecstasy)? (If this were absolutely a memory, it would not be outlandish to accuse Dad of sexual abuse, given how Equius looks like he’s giving Gamzee head while he’s being choked, as though Equius were actually gagging on a dick. But for lack of any other instance of this coming up, it seems more likely to me that John has eroticized otherwise normal interactions with Dad?)

…but then what of the death of Nepeta? Is her failed attempt to avenge herself upon this past also a part of the dream? Does Gamzee scarring himself imply and integration of Equius’s knack for taking pleasure in pain?

3462: …or rather, Nepeta’s death marks the exact point that we exit the dream, the car’s beeps one again replacing Gamzee’s honks. So it’s as though she was John’s eyes, preparing to die a second death at the hands of the patriarch, and the result is an awakening, and fall back to Earth (crashing the car again).

3465: Oh goody, Vriska’s manifesting in response to all of this as John arrives at the castle. Please enlighten me Vriska, I’m dreadfully confused.

3466: Vriska telling John he looks great with his hood up reminds me of Vriska telling him how great he looks in her clothes, making me wonder if the windsock hoodie is being construed as long hair. In which case, as per Egbert’s weird gendering of hierarchy, it’s possible that his ultimate refusal to consider upending the total authority of (his image of) Dad comes with the feminization of himself…? Hence Vriska’s current interjection.

3467: …the doubt and regret surrounding Vriska’s lifetime of murder is loaded in a way I am utterly failing to parse. I don’t think Homestuck ever painted aggression as a ‘masculine virtue’ or whatever so there’s no reason to take John’s vocal horror at the bloodshed as a feminine thing.

3468: X marks the spot…. why here, though?

…Vriska seems to be making the connection between violence and sexuality, both noting that the game selects players on the cusp of sexual maturity and contending that if Karkat hadn’t done such a great job of brokering the peace between teams, perhaps more of them would have god tiered…

Her observation that the dead-girl (Aradia) had John’s same laptop is ominous for some reason. I know the kids have a paranoia that they are in the Matrix, and that if the die/wake up, they will suddenly be real – but stuff like this always makes me paranoid that someone is /actually/ secretly dead, like Aradia. Hate that feeling.

…more likely that John views himself as metaphorically dead, as a mere hollow vessel before the divine will, and thus feminized before God? But my ability to parse all of this deteriorated like 20 pages ago.

3475: involves Vriska and John musing how alike they are in emulating their ancestors, for anyone who wasn’t aware that was a Thing

…and we’re done. Well that was pointless. Let’s go to the point were dead!John and Vriska go on a date. Vriska opens up with a reminder that she made John change close, then mostly teases John about how she will kill him, as John intermittently brings up Little Monsters.

Did you know that in Little Monsters, the tire swing is used to represent a noose? It’s like when Vriska accused John of being obsessed with her as he attempted to prototype Grandpa’s blue beauties… the undertone was that he was obsessed with death (through the medium of the crypto corpses). Which is, more characterization of the dead/vessel as implicitly feminine or?

…I’m not learning a lot going through their d8 again, but I sure am getting sad.

…Yeah I’m getting nothing, psychology-wise. We’re done here.

[bunimalsfiberdolls]

smoke and daggers

[classicalsatanism-blog]

CLASSICAL SATANISM TEXT 2 The Ruling Demonic Legion

Given here is the Ruling Demonic Legion of Hell … their Names, Genders, most powerful Day and Moon Phase to call upon them as well as their Demonic Title by which they may be Called. Below this areas of influence over which each of the Demons hold power are detailed to aid the Practitioner in selecting the appropriate Demons for the Workings they undertake … particularly in such Workings Evocation and Invocation. The inclusion of Days appropriate for each Demon calls Planetary Forces into play, for those not interested in incorporating such Forces then simply ignored these elements ~ whether you plan to incorporate these influences or not never let them dictate putting off a Working of importance, for the Demons can be summoned on any day at any time. The Moon Phases are also not a mandatory obligation but included for those who have an interest in harnessing the power of Moon phases into their Workings, however I do find this element more useful than that of the Planetary influenced days as the Moon itself has such a strong influence on so many areas of are World and ourselves. In truth on a Planetary level the one Planet connected to all Demons is that of Saturn, its energy, its Dark Current completely conducive and attuned to the Infernal Currents of the Demons themselves … which is why the Sigils of the Demons utilized in this Book have been designed upon the Kamea Planetary Square of Saturn. SATAN - Male Day- Saturday Moon Phase - Dark Title: Infernal Father Of Hell Occult Wisdom ~ Black Magick ~ Knowledge ~ Mastery ~ Protection ~ Healing ~ Power ~ The Dark Arts ~ Rulership ~ Authority ~ Command ~ Demonic Power ~ Creation ~ Desire. LILITH - Female Day - Monday Moon Phase - Dark Title - Infernal Mother Of Hell Infertility ~ Miscarriage ~ Lust ~ Menstruation ~ Mandragoras ~ Stillbirth ~ Desire ~ Destruction Of The Pious ~ Slaying The Clergy ~ Abortion ~ Death ~ Hexes ~ Succubi. ABADDON - Male Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Prince Of The Desolate Pit Destruction ~ Death ~ Misery ~ Torture ~ Hexing ~ Binding ~ Isolation ~ Cursing ~ Desolation ~ Fetishism ~ Pain ~ Darkness ~ The Black Arts ~ Catastrophe. SATANACHIA - Androgynous   Day - Tuesday Moon Phase - Full Title - Weaver Of That Made Manifest Lust ~ Seduction ~ Protection ~ Passion ~ Success ~ Magick ~ Sexual Manipulation ~ Sigil Magick ~ Controversy ~ Deliberation. ADRAMALECH - Male Day - Monday/Tuesday Moon Phase - Waning Title ~ Prince Of Pestilence Plague ~ Disease ~ Blood Sacrifice ~ Pestilence ~ Malady ~ Pandemic ~ Viruses ~ Cursing ~ Malediction ~ Desolation ~ Destruction. AGALIAREPT - Male Day - Monday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Keeper Of The Gate The Initiatory Path ~ Initiation ~ Gateways ~ Portals ~ Scrying ~ Seership ~ Other Realms ~ Divination ~ The Gates Of Hell ~ Knowledge ~ Literature. AGRAT BAT MAHLAT - Female Day - Friday Moon Phase - Full Title - Princess Of Wanton Desire Harlotry ~ Sex ~ Fornication ~ Infidelity ~ Seducing Other Women’s Husbands ~ Prostitution ~ Sexuality ~ Promiscuity ~ Wanton Sexuality. SARGATANAS - Androgynous Day - Monday Moon Phase - Full Title - Guardian Of The Faithful Psychic Protection ~ Magickal Protection ~ Safe Travel ~ Seduction ~ Command ~ Psychic Powers ~ Protection ~ Fortitude. ALASTOR - Male Day - Tuesday/Saturday Moon Phase - Dark Title - Lord Of Bloodshed Death ~ Destruction ~ Execution ~ Assassination ~ Bloodshed ~ Violence ~ Murder ~ Bloodlust ~ Brutality ~ Torture ~ Retribution. MEPHISTO - Male Day - Wednesday Moon Phase - Waxing Maker Of Pacts Revenge ~ Pacts ~ Deals ~ Trade ~ Commerce ~ Etiquette ~ Passion ~ Liberation ~ Wisdom ~ Contracts ~ Oaths ~ Trading ~ Enticement. ASHTAROT - Female Day - Sunday/Friday Moon Phase - Waxing Princess Of Gestation Creating Magickal Beings ~ Psychogones ~ Golems ~ Egregores ~ Sexuality ~ Desire ~ Lust ~ Sex Magick ~ Servitors ~ Mandragoras ~ Ritual Sex. ASMODEUS - Male Day - Tuesday Moon Phase - Full Lord Of The Carnal House Lust ~ Spirit Boards ~ Protection Of Others ~ Protection Of The Self ~ Desire ~ Male Virility ~ Sexual Possession ~ Liberation ~ Wisdom ~ Power. BEELZEBUB - Male Day - Sunday/Thursday Moon Phase - Full Standard Bearer Of Hell Power ~ Strength ~ Bravery ~ Fortitude ~ Loyalty ~ Influencing Other People ~ Command ~ Authority ~ Leadership ~ Military Tactics ~ Conflict ~ Mastery. ARIOCH - Male Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Dark Title - Harbinger Of Revenge Revenge ~ Karma ~ Retribution ~ Justice ~ Vengeance ~ Bloodlust ~ Vindication ~ Attonement ~ Punishment ~ Legal Victory. BEHEMOTH - Androgynous Day - Tuesday/Sunday Moon Phase - Full Title - Demon Of Decadence Avarice ~ Greed ~ Sloth ~ Luxury ~ Apathy ~ Lewdness ~ Exhibitionism ~ Voyeurism ~ Seduction ~ Debauchery ~ Blasphemy ~ Decadence. NAAMAH - Female Day - Friday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Princess Of Seduction Seduction ~ Fornication ~ Seducing The Pious ~ Sexual Excess ~ Adultery ~ Sexual Possession ~ Succubi ~ Fertility ~ Sexual Vampirism. BELPHEGOR - Androgynous Day - Friday/Sunday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Architect Of Creation Love ~ Inventions ~ Friendships ~ Alliances ~ Reconciliation ~ Creativity ~ Craftsmanship ~ Ideas ~ Binding Lovers ~ Relationships ~ Compromise. EURYNOMOUS - Male Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Prince Of Tears Death ~ Suicide ~ Depression ~ Self Harm ~ Pain ~ Misery ~ Loss ~ Mental Disease ~ Paranoia ~ Apathy ~ Misanthropy ~ Misfortune ~ Malice. EISHETH - Female Day - Friday Moon Phase - Full Title - Seducer Of The Pious Lust ~ Seduction ~ Desire ~ Fornication ~ Seducing Others Lovers ~ Promiscuity ~ Passion ~ Seducing The Chaste ~ Inciting Adultery In Others. LEONARD - Male Day - Saturday/Wednesday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Master Of The Arts Black Magick ~ Voodoo ~ Sorcery ~ Knowledge Of The Occult ~ Hexing ~ Cursing ~ Dark Magickal Arts ~ Witchcraft ~ Spellcraft. LUCIFUGE - Male Day - Sunday/Thursday Moon Phase - Full Title - Grand Paymaster Of Hell Wealth ~ Prosperity ~ Good Fortune ~ Riches ~ Gold ~ Promotion ~ Ambition ~ Attaining Lucrative Employment ~ Money ~ Luxury. MAMMON - Male Day - Wednesday/Thursday Moon Phase - Full Title - Prince Of The Golden Throne Wealth ~ Power ~ Money Lending ~ Banking ~ Business ~ Commerce ~ Business Deals ~ Employment ~ Dictatorship ~ Management. UKOBACH - Androgynous Day - Sunday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Watcher Of The Flame Fire ~ Pyromancy ~ Ash Scrying ~ Protection From Fire ~ Commanding Fire ~ Defeating Flames ~ Divination ~ Passion ~ Lust. XAPHAN - Androgynous Day - Sunday/Tuesday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Bringer Of The Inferno Fire ~ Fire Seership ~ Burning ~ Destruction By Fire ~ Death By Fire ~ Infernos ~ Burning Properties ~ Death ~ Wrath ~ Anger. ABYZOU - Female Day - Friday/Saturday Moon Phase - Dark Title - Feeder Upon The Soul Possession ~ Lust ~ Pain ~ Hatred ~ Discord ~ Destruction ~ Anger ~ Obsession ~ Blasphemy ~ Death ~ Torture. RIMMON - Male Day - Sunday Moon Phase - Full Title - Grand Physician Of Hell Healing ~ Medicine ~ Science ~ Mathematics ~ Healing The Self ~ Medication ~ Health ~ Physical Rejuvenation ~ Medical Success. UNSERE - Female Day - Friday Moon Phase - Full Title - Princess Of The Giving Womb Childbirth ~ Healing ~ Pregnancy ~ Fertility ~ Safe Childbirth ~ Family ~ Healing Children ~ Fertility Of The Land ~ Harvests ~ Cultivation ~ Healing Charms. SONNEILLON - Female Day - Tuesday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Weaver Of Discord Discord ~ Disagreements ~ Arguments ~ Conflicts ~ Divorce ~ Feuds ~ Strife ~ Hate ~ Grudges ~ Family Feuds. DELEPITORAE - Female Day - Friday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Princess Of Enchantments Seduction ~ Enchantment ~ Sexuality ~ Entrapment ~ Allure ~ Glamour ~ Beauty ~ Feminine Enticement ~ Sensuality. HUICTIIGARA - Female Day - Monday Moon Phase - All Phases Title - Lady Of Dreams Sleep ~ Insomnia ~ Dreams ~ Lucid Dreaming ~ Dream Prophecy ~ Nightmares ~ Command Of Dreams ~ Meditation ~ Protection On The Dreamscape. FRIMOST - Male Day - Tuesday Moon Phase - Full Title - Possessor Of The Flesh Seducing Young Women ~ Seducing The Wives Of Other Men ~ Promiscuity ~ Sexual Excess ~ Liberation ~ Sexual Libertine Behaviour ~ Adultery. BECHARD - Androgynous Day - Sunday/Thursday Moon Phase - All Phases Title - Harbinger Of Storms Storms ~ Rain ~ Winds ~ Thunder ~ Lightning ~ Weather Magick ~ Control Of Storms ~ Tempests ~ Hail ~ Windstorms ~ Snow. FRUCISSIERE - Male Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Lord Of The Dead Necromancy ~ Death Rites ~ Mediumship ~ Dark Rituals ~ Ouija ~ Automatic Writing ~ Seership ~ Seances ~ Funerals ~ Passing The Dead. GULAND - Androgynous Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Bringer Of Malady Inflicting Disease ~ Plague ~ Malady ~ Infecting Wounds ~ Fatal Illnesses ~ Pandemic ~ Germs ~ Viruses ~ Sickness ~ Ailments. BRULEFER - Androgynous Day - Friday Moon Phase - Full Title - Demon Of Alliance Love ~ Friendships ~ Allegiance ~ Alliances ~ Partnerships ~ Compromise ~ Passion ~ Compassion ~ Empathy ~ Reconciling Friends. HIEPACTH - Androgynous Day - Monday Moon Phase - Full Title - Keeper Of The Lost Discovering The Lost ~ Finding Missing People ~ Discoveries ~ Locating Those Missing ~ Finding Missing Items ~ Revealing Secrets ~ Revelation. MORAIL - Androgynous Day - Monday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Demon Of The Veil Invisibility ~ Hiding ~ Concealment Of Truth ~ Concealment Of Others ~ Anonymity ~ Remaining Hidden ~ Remaining Unseen ~ Clandestine Plans. FRUTIMIERE - Androgynous Day - Wednesday Moon Phase - Full Title - Bringer Of Joy Celebrations ~ Festivals ~ Gatherings ~ Parties ~ Happiness ~ Harmony ~ Fruition ~ Rewards ~ Recognition ~ Occasions ~ Entertainment. KHIL - Androgynous Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Harbinger Of Chaos Earthquakes ~ Storms ~ Natural Disasters ~ Tsunamis ~ Volcanic Eruptions ~ Flooding ~ Mass Destruction ~ Astral Storms ~ Chaos. MERSILDE - Female Day - Monday Moon Phase - All Phases Title - Lady Of The Spheres Astral Protection ~ Astral Projection ~ Astral Travel ~ Visualization ~ Meditation ~ Pathworking ~ Entering Other Realms ~ Oracles. BALTHAZAR - Male Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Prince Of Torment Pain ~ Misery ~ Torment ~ Persecution ~ Evil ~ Wickedness ~ Inflicting Loss ~ Mental Torture ~ Fear ~ Harassment ~ Demise. NYSROGH - Androgynous Day - Wednesday/Thursday Moon Phase - Full Title - The Harlequin Of Hell Promotion ~ Position ~ Commanding Lower Spirits ~ Commanding Elementals ~ Etiquette ~ Charm ~ Wit ~ Popularity ~ Influence Of Others. CARNIVENAN - Androgynous Day - Monday/Thursday Moon Phase - Full Title - Demon Of Sorceries Witchcraft ~ Sorcery ~ Black Magick ~ Pride ~ Strength ~ Boldness ~ Arrogance ~ Augury ~ Sorcerous Knowledge ~ Willpower. VERDELET - Androgynous Day - Wednesday Moon Phase - Full Title - The Shapeshifter Of Hell Ceremonies ~ Rituals ~ Command ~ Class ~ Etiquette ~ Popularity ~ Judgement ~ Compelling The Will Of Others ~ Aesthetics. PHILOTANUS - Male Day - Wednesday Moon Phase - Full Title - Lord Of Wisdom Teaching ~ Philosophy ~ Understanding ~ Intellect ~ Knowledge ~ Experience ~ Wisdom ~ Studying ~ Commitment ~ Comprehension ~ Exams. ARPHAXAT - Male Day - Tuesday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Prince Of Blasphemies Possession ~ Sexual Possession ~ Control ~ Compulsion ~ Blasphemy ~ Desecration ~ Sin ~ Wickedness ~ Spite ~ Discord ~ Self Destruction. ROSIER - Female Day - Friday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Mistress Of Unions Marriage ~ Proposals ~ Engagements ~ Love ~ Passion ~ Longevity Of Love ~ Alliances ~ Acceptance Of Proposals ~ Courting ~ Charm ~ Romance. PICOLLUS - Androgynous Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Walker Within Shades Necromancy ~ Death Hexes ~ Blood Sacrifice ~ Cursing ~ Doom ~ Calamity ~ Catastrophe ~ Mediumship ~ Bloodshed ~ Death. FLEURETY - Androgynous Day - Thursday/Monday Moon Phase - Full Title - Demon Of Demands Commanding Lower Servitors ~ Commanding The Mandragora Spirits ~ Hail ~ Rain ~ Strategies ~ Command ~ Rulership. MUSISIN - Androgynous Day - Thursday Moon Phase - Full Title - The Demon Of Manipulation Influencing Those In Authority ~ Commanding Those In Power ~ Influencing The Will Of Another ~ Authority ~ Seduction Of Will ~ Manipulation. CLAUNECK - Female Day - Sunday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Mistress Of Fortune Riches ~ Wealth ~ Inheritance ~ Heirlooms ~ Legacies ~ Financial Security ~ Money ~ Financial Gain ~ Investments ~ Rewards ~ Financial Rewards. SEGAL - Female Day - Monday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Mistress Of Apparitions Apparitions ~ Paranormal Phenomena ~ Illusions ~ Paranoia ~ Terror ~ Hauntings ~ Inciting Paranormal Activity ~ Ghosts. VERRIER - Female Day - Sunday Moon Phase - Full Title - Princess Of Healing Healing Others ~ Good Health ~ Vitality ~ Herbal Medicine ~ Natural Healing ~ Health ~ Healing The Elderly ~ Banishing Disease ~ Vanquishing Malady. JEZEBETH - Female Day - Wednesday/Friday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Mistress Of The Serpent Deceit ~ Jealousy ~ Envy ~ Manipulation ~ Obsession ~ Material Greed ~ Lies ~ Cunning ~ Concealment Of Intentions ~ Mental Manipulation. CLISTHERET - Androgynous Day - Monday/Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - The Wraith Of Hell Illusions ~ Mirages ~ Dreams ~ Nightmares ~ Mental Imbalance ~ Schizophrenia ~ Insanity ~ Apparitions ~ Fear ~ Paranoia ~ Mistrust. HUMOTS - Androgynous Day - Wednesday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Demon Of Tomes Locating Books ~ Literature ~ Archives ~ Libraries ~ Research ~ Book Discoveries ~ Tomes ~ Knowledge ~ Grimoires ~ Manuscripts. BIFFANT - Male Day - Saturday/Tuesday Moon Phase - Dark Title - Lord Of Destruction Possession ~ Holocausts ~ Genocide ~ Death ~ Persecution ~ Conflict ~ Destruction ~ Disasters ~ Volatility ~ Demise. SERGUTTHY - Male Day - Wednesday/Tuesday Moon Phase - Full Title - Prince Of Manipulation Influencing Women ~ Seducing Women ~ Inciting Women To Sexual Promiscuity ~ Charming Women ~ Compelling Women. ELELOGAP - Female Day - Monday/Saturday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Princess Of The Depths Drowning ~ Bodies Of Water ~ Sinking Sailing Vessels ~ Storms At Sea ~ Tidal Waves ~ The Tides ~ Hydromancy ~ Lake Scrying ~ Protection At Sea. SERGULATH - Male Day - Thursday Moon Phase - Thursday Title - Lord Of The Battlefield Military Tactics ~ Dividing Enemy Allies ~ Combat ~ Dividing Alliances ~ Strategies ~ Plans ~ Military Success ~ Command ~ Vigour ~ Bravery. SIRCHADE - Androgynous Day - Friday Moon Phase - Full Title - Lover Of Beasts Communication With Animals ~ Protecting Animals ~ Healing Animals ~ Totem Animals ~ Animal Spirits ~ Nature ~ Wildlife ~ Linguistics. AGLASIS - Male Day - Wednesday/Monday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Prince Of Sojourns Safe Journeys ~ Transport ~ Trade Deals ~ Transportation ~ Protection On Journeys ~ Communication ~ Travel ~ Expeditions. PENTAGANONY - Androgynous Day - Thursday Moon Phase - Full Title - Master Of Masters Granting Favours From Those In Power ~ Gaining Profitable Alliances ~ Gaining Powerful Alliances ~ Compelling Those In Authority ~ Sedition ~ Charm. TEZRIAN - Female Day - Saturday Moon Phase - Dark Title - The Soul Gatherer War ~ Warfare ~ Gathering The Souls Of Dead Warriors ~ Mass Death ~ Graveyards ~ Battles ~ Destruction ~ Global Conflict. PROCULO - Androgynous Day - Monday Moon Phase - All Phases Title - The Dream Painter Sleep ~ Peaceful Slumber ~ Rejuvenation ~ Seership ~ Dreams ~ Prophetic Dreams ~ Dream Travel ~ Command Of Dreams ~ Trances. ELMEK - Male Day - Saturday/Tuesday Moon Phase - Dark Title - Lord Of Blades Blades ~ Knives ~ Death By Blade ~ Swordsmanship ~ Fatal Wounds ~ Concealed Weapons ~ Concealing Homicide ~ Infected Wounds. NYBASS - Androgynous Day - Monday Moon Phase - Waxing Title - Waiter In The Shadows Visions ~ Apparitions ~ Messages ~ Oracles ~ Divination ~ Lucid Dreaming ~ Remote Viewing ~ Augury ~ Possession ~ Psychic Attacks. SUCCORBENOTH - Androgynous Day - Friday/Monday Moon Phase - Waning Title - Demon Of Excess Jealousy ~ Emotional Imbalance ~ Possessiveness ~ Sexual Obsession ~ Wanton Lust ~ Exhibitionism ~ Attention ~ Pity. ©copyright2018 Brother Nemo

[cloudycrystalkpop]

One shots masterlist

AUs:

NCT U Predator AU Series Masterlist

Neo Culture Coven Technology AU Masterlist

Folklore AU Masterlist 

Reverse Folktale AU Masterist

Looking Glass AU Masterlist

Underground AU Masterlist

hybrid AU masterlist

covens AU masterlist

Groups:

* SUGA | RESILIENCE | (shifter!) Suga x (witch!) reader | MOODBOARD

she witnessed that no matter what came at him, he always pulled through. he was impossable to shake. | -

* SUGA | LEATHER AND GASOLINE | (Agust D!) Suga x reader + feat. JHope

“i told you one of these days i wasn’t gunna be able to watch your back, and here i am, supposed to be the one stabbing you in the back.” | language, gun violence

* RM | SMOKE | (blue caterpiller!) RM x (Alice!) reader

the way the smoke billowed and curled reminded her of they way his thoughts would whisp around him as they coiled off his tongue. | smoking

* RM | CRAZY = GENIUS | (arsonist!) RM x reader

you can set yourself on fire, but you’re never gunna burn. you can set yourself on fire, but you’re never gunna learn. | mild drinking

* JHOPE | REFLECT | (sun god!) JHope x (moon godess!) reader

she spent her world living in his shadow, but that wasn’t the way he saw it. | -

* XIUMIN | WONDERLOST | (cheshire!) Xiumin x (Alice!) reader

she was lost in the wonder of such a place, and he was lost in the wonder of her. | -

* XIUMIN | CLOVER | (wolf!) Xiumin x (witch!) reader | MOODBOARD

after so many years of being on your own, you now have a gentle wolf to watch your back. | gender neutral reader

* XIUMIN | CRESCENT EYES | (witch!) Xiumin x (hybrid!) reader

as winter melted into spring, so his power drained from him. for the first time in the countless years, he had received no sign from his creator. instead of the guiding light, he found his strength in the shy crescent eyes of a feline. | -

* BAEKHYUN | ATTENTION | Byun Baekhyun x reader

Baekhyun had been ignoring her, and she began to suspect him of possably cheating on her with another idol. | -

* CHANYEOL | LOST BOY | (changeling!) Park Chanyeol x reader | MOODBOARD

lonely little boy, you never really belonged. but that’s alright, nether did she. | -

* CHANYEOL | GUARD DOG | (hybrid! familiar!) Park Chanyeol x (witch!) reader | MOODBOARD

i can’t take care of you anymore | -

* CHANYEOL | STERLING | Park Chanyeol x reader

you always had a curosity with dolls. your father used to bring you robotic ones he made in his tinkering. sometimes, you wondered, if you could bring them life. you blamed that for your later intrest in necromancy. | voodoo, gore

* SEHUN | DARK SIDE | Star Wars AU (Jedi!) Sehun x (Nightsister!) reader

Sehun was unsure of whether or not to trust this witch with an affinity for the dark side. | smut

* JB | DRIPPING ROSES | (knave of hearts!) Im Jaebum x (alice!) reader

silly little girl, i don’t think you’ll much like what you find in the heart of wonderland. | slight gore

* JACKSON | SELFLESS | (dragon!) Jackson Wang x (mystic!) reader

he was cursed for his family, but she set him free. | character death

* JINYOUNG | OF FAERIES AND FORSETS | Park Jinyoung x (faerie!)reader | MOODBOARD

Jinyoung had always been curious about the forest, and what creatures wandered there. | duel endings

* YOUNGJAE | PRECIOUS | (blood slave!) Choi Youngjae x (vampire!) reader + feat. N

he was her most precious possesion. | a little bit of master/slave kink tbh, but not very sexual.

* BAMBAM | SURVIVAL OF THE RICHEST | post-apocalyptic au! Bambam x reader | MOODBOARD

morals are simply a set back in the aftermath. they’ll get you destroyed. | mentions of sexual assault against minors

* BAMBAM | SNOWGLOBE | Bambam x reader

for as long as he could remember, the cold nipped at his nose. The snow dusted his clothes. The trees where always stickly, covered in a layer of shimmering ice. But he always wondered, what lay just past the old lampost. | -

* YUGYEOM | SALT WATER | (siren!) Kim Yugyeom x reader + feat. (cabin boy!) Jisung + NCT

she could hear it, that distant melody. it called to her, cared for her, looked out for her when no one else would. | impiled sexual harassment and assault

* JOHNNY | PROMISE | revolution au! Johnny Seo x reader 

we’ll shout it from the tallest building / we’ll be here when their heart stops beating (inspired by Wake Up by Black Veil Brides) | gun violence, language

* TAEYONG | FREEDOM | (run away au!) Lee Taeyong x reader | MOODBOARD

some kids never learn. | mentions of achehol and cigarettes

* TAEYONG | HARLEQUIN | (yandere!) Lee Taeyong x (psychopath!) reader | MOODBOARD

he would do whatever she asked, more than happy to simply be a member of her cort of jesters, even if that ment his silence. |  mental illness, emotional abuse

* TAEYONG | ROSE COLORED BOY | (prince!) Lee Taeyong x (knight!) reader

a beautiful, youthful prince, the crown jewel of his kingdom, kindhearted and breathtaking in beauty, locked away and lost. frozen in time, forever young as the years pass around him. | reverse sleeping beauty au

* TEN | RELEVE | (dance teacher!) Ten x (ballet student!) reader

he was born with the rhythm in his blood, and his words were kind to those who looked for guidance. | -

* MARK + LUCAS | PRAY FOR THE WICKED | Mark x reader x Lucas | PART TWO

 sin will find you | drug use, sexual themes and implied threesome, some guy x guy 

* RENJUN | EAST IS UP | Renjun x reader

it can take some time to compleatly wake up when you’ve been alseep for so long. | inspired by Jumpsuit by Twenty One Pilots

* HAECHAN | MALICE | Haechan x reader

not everyone get’s to have a happy childhood, some of them tread on shattered glass though hellfire. in that heat you eather burn or freeze. | violence

* JAEMIN | DISTORTION | (yandere! merman!) Jaemin x reader | MOODBOARD

your kind forgot long ago, that it’s sea water that falls from your eyes you simply renamed to tears. | drowning

* G-DRAGON | IN-SANE-ITY | (mad hatter!) G-Dragon x (Alice!) reader

what’s so weird about being a little weird? | -

* N | RHYTHM | (spirit!) N x reader

there is a rhythm in all living things. if you listen, you can feel it’s hum. | -

* N | REDRUM | (ghost!) N x (cannibal!) reader

all work and no play, makes you just so… hungry… | all the warnings. !!!

* LEO | CREATURE OF THE NIGHT | (skinwalker!) Leo x (medicine woman!) reader | MOODBOARD

you don’t talk about them. you never go out by yourself, for fear you might run into one. no one knows what they actually do, for everyone who encounters one and doesn’t get away, disappears for good. | dule endings

* KEN | POCKET WATCHER | (white rabbit!) Ken x (Alice!) reader

her curiosity seemed to always run away with her… but what was curiouser than finding a handsome young man alone in the woods? | -

* RAVI | THE SORCERESS’ APPRENTICE | (apprentice!) Ravi x (sorceress!) reader + feat. (vampire!) Xiumin | MOODBOARD

Ravi had left his coven in search of a sorcerer powerful enough to teach him his full magical potental. | adult and sexual themes

* RAVI | RITUAL | (apprentice!) Ravi x (sorceress!) reader | MOODBOARD

Magic like this is forbidden, and for good reason. | mild adult content

* RAVI | WARRIOR QUEEN | Ravi x reader

she had missed her chance, and now it tore her apart. | mental illness

* HONGBIN | ROOM 217 | Hongbin x reader

The Overlook Hotel is known to be home to some very… interesting spirits. | smut

* HYUK | SICKNESS | Hyuk x reader

sometimes the most beautiful rose in the pained broken one. | character death

* HYUNGWON | TEAPOT | (doormouse!) Hyungwon x (Alice!) reader

sometimes even the smallest things can become large depending on your veiw point. | -

* HYUNGWON + I.M | HALO | (witch!) Hyungwon + (witch!) I.M

divinity magic | -

* WONHO | FLOWER PETALS | (ghost!) Wonho x reader

everything has a story to tell if you are willing to listen. | mentions of rape and murder

* ALL | BELOW THE MARSH | seven deadly sins series

some things hide just below unassuming appearances | seven different endings

* WOOJIN | MONSTER | (vampire!) Kim Woojin x reader

if you look past the gentle smiles, you may find what you believed to be innocence is not as pure as before. | slight yandere

* BANG CHAN | SECOND NATURE | (wolf!) Bang Chan x reader

while she might look at first glance, just like any of the other humans, he could smell the wolf in her blood. Long quiet and sleeping patently. He itched to set that wolf free, and watch her dance under the moonlight. | -

* FELIX | THE BOYS WITH FLAMES FOR HAIR | (reverse little mermaid au) Lee Felix x reader

the deep but gentle voice seemed to haunt you. Playing over and over again in the back of your mind. The fuzzy outline of the boy who saved you waited just behind your eyelids. His vibrant hair reminded you sometimes of the mute boy who had wandered into your backyard… | suicide attempt mention

* TAEMIN | DOWNPOUR | (naiad!) Lee Taemin x reader

he is that heavy feeling in your chest when the sky opens up and pours. he glances at you through the curtain of rain drops, the embodiment of mother nature’s sweat and tears. | depression

* ZTAO | ORACLE | (witch!) Tao x reader

there are whispers in shadows of the magic world. Whispers of a cult of witches, fortune tellers. But these are no normal tarot readers, these are oracles. The whispers warn of the horrible things that happen to those who seek out the members of this cult. | slight adult themes

[k-e-monroe]

SONG TITLE PROMPTS

3. How Do U Want It

(Requested By Alec)

About A Girl: “She comes to me, with all the caresses and in the softness I imagined, offering sweet promises and spice-kissed lips.  Like a stone, the ache settles in my chest and I crave just a taste--sweat and ink, sex and musk.  The epitome of beauty and unsound mind--she is the wilderness and I the bold adventurer.  The more I explore, the more  I learn the valleys that she harbors are deeply embedded with her secrets in the tapestry of her soul.  The dips of her body, hot breasts above a shuddering rib cage and shapely, caramel thighs quick to part, are a miraculous sight to behold, but her mind no less a descent straight into chaos--a lost paradise . Where The Wild Things Are.  All these territories of her blueprint remind me of charred ash and madness and the inability to say NO.  She renders me powerless.  And even though I know it’s only short-lived--the bliss between her thighs is worth a lifetime of lies.”  

9. Personal Jesus

(Requested By Sorrow)

“Years spent living in black & white and under bible belt circumscription, mapped out a world all too confining.  Child-like ardor and natural curiosity often denounced for the sake of a religious mob with puritanical mindsets was no less despairing and the spirit of innocence, playful possession trumped by ingrained doubt and fear, was entirely inspired by an omnipotent God eager to cast his judgment and execute punishment.  So, I read the good book like a fable, anything to keep my tenacious curiosities and free spirit from being snuffed out by another’s truth.  And so it was written, little girls should be seen and not heard.  With a voice silenced and will dictated by an organized religion, freedom was just a concept understood, but not truly lived. Survival became imminent.  

Little girls trapped by circumstance will breed tiny little monsters in the depths of their afflicted hearts.

Growing up in the Bible Belt and with a family of Evangelicals, everyday life gave way to nothing short of an illiberal upbringing.  The majority of the time, I had nothing but my own thoughts, curiosities, and the boundless depths of my imagination to get me through the monotony of ‘church’ days and events.  Maybe I was just born bad, like Eve in the Garden, succumbing to the want of all those earthly desires and sins my dear ole preacher would adamantly speak against.  Or maybe it was some sort of rebellion or even reverse mind control against the doctrine. Whatever the case, I certainly wasn’t the good little Christian my adoptive parents prayed for nightly.  I do remember the first time I realized just how wicked and far from grace I had fallen, and just how much I enjoyed my budding debauchery.

Church--being in The House of the Lord, it always did do funny things to me. Even when I was just a tiny, little thing, I found myself swept up in the spirit of it all.  It was as if I was excited and incited by the Holy Spirit himself!  He moved right through me.  As I got older though, that feeling began to change into something less pure and the more fire and brimstone damnation the preacher preached, the more my thoughts would become corrupt.  It might have been all of that poetry and scripture from the old testament about sinful women and the hazards of desire or the rants about some television broadcast depicting sado-masochistic perversions, and the burning of incense and the profanation of pagan altars, or maybe it was the atmosphere of the divine and Holy Spirit sweeping over the congregation, but less than Holy urges stirred within the apex of my sex and from the depths of loins I sang a praise chorus unlike any other.

I prayed, but not for forgiveness for my wickedness.  I prayed for release.  No scripture ever prepared me for such an experience--for this temptation.  Oh Holy Holy!  When it came time for communion, I walked the church floors, burdened by sinners before me and walls threaded by the grotesque images depicting a tortured and tormented Christ, his journey to the cross, the crucifixion, and lastly his resurrection and ascendancy.  I gritted my teeth and clenched my thighs along the way--gospel riding my filthy tongue.  HALLELUJAH! PRAISE BE HIS NAME!   By the time I reached the altar, I was the one that had ascended.  Down on my knees in reverence and quivering in bliss--my innocence lost between hymn and scripture.  My virtue just a puddle in the fabric of my white cotton panties.”

11. Crazy In Love

(Requested By War King)

“When you walk into the room, I’m tongue tied and twisted in knots. Breathless with a racing heart, I can’t even convey the simplest of thoughts. Cast a glance in my direction, looking me over with those wanton eyes and that signature smirk, and I forget myself. Just a touch of your hand and a kiss of your lips, I’m left quivering at the knees and with dripping hips. THERE IS NOTHING I WOULDN’T DO FOR YOUR LOVE.”

Love, when pertaining to the heart and romance is a mysterious, unpredictable beast with a wicked design and when not solidified by a profound bond is more often than not fickle.  For most people, they come up in life experiencing various degrees of heartfelt and romantic love.  Beliefs and notions formed on their ideals of it just as much as said experiences in its regard.  Some say that the need and want for companionship is intrinsic to the human condition therefore LOVE simply exists by default--a reason to explain away said needs and wants for companionship so people aren’t forced to confront the simple fact that loneliness breeds fear and most all are held hostage by carnal impulse.  

LOVE wraps the truth in a pretty package so people can feel better about themselves and the fact that the fear inspires neediness and the carnal impulse spurs a hunger relentless in its efforts to be sated.  LOVE paints the truth a pretty picture so people can feel better about the harsh reality just beneath the gossamer surface. Whatever the case, this isn’t meant to minimize love and the ideals and notions behind it nor is it meant to trivialize the belief in love, it is simply an honest opinion from the abstract mind of a young woman with the ability to see people and world logically, breaking it all down and compartmentalizing the bits and pieces of the construct whilst empathizing greatly to the plight of others.  It’s simply a belief from a young woman yet to experience the intensity and impact of romantic love.  

All her life, Kimber has been acutely aware of those around her, being both ridiculously perceptive and ‘unnaturally’ in tune with the energies catapulted into the proverbial ether.  If anything, it gives one damn good reason that she is so skilled at her job thus successful for one so early on in a career as a Psychologist.  However, surprisingly enough, it has not done her any favors when it comes to romance and love.  If anything, it works against her and she has yet to find herself in its warm embrace, drowning in the euphoria of a fairytale and happy ever after.  But it’s NOT a fairytale and a happy ending or even a Harlequin Romance that she desires much less needs.  No--not in the slightest.  

13. A Little Less Conversation

(Requested By Wayne)

“Eager from anticipation, I remember hanging on desperately to the breath caught between the part of my not so chaste pout as his calloused thumb traced the crest of my lips. He said, “You’re a bad habit but a tasty treat.” With a bawdy expression and trembling thighs, the world suddenly came to a halt and I was left at the mercy of his depravity--melting from my apex.  “Please,” I murmured, the word softly echoing in the ether between us as his rough, commanding hands traveled the tender canvas of my taut flesh.  With a firm grip around my delicate neck, senses were roused and words were undoubtedly lost in translation, but our bodies knew well the language in which we were speaking.”