#silver run falls
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blind0raven · 4 months ago
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Pffft
I just love how they already are just accepting the chaos that will commence (or know they can't escape it~)
Meanwhile
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Malleus be like
"I welcome the chaos, let us welcome the gremlins~"
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thistransient · 1 year ago
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silverselfshippingchaos · 2 months ago
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this is slightly embarrassing, but this line always makes me blush
hearing him say the word "ash"... like me 😳
#ash rambles 💚#like a flowing wind 🔳#AQHDKQGDJWGDNWVDNHWDJHERJ ASH.. HIS VOICE.. SJDHWNFHNFJENDHWJSHWJE I'm self inserting so hard#but also. wow. he's so fucking pretentious. silver ash.. i know I've posted about it before but still sjdjwjdjs#it's so fucking funny#he's got ash on the mind so much that he's gotta call his hair silver ash-#i actually really like the color#he's just pretty#it should come as no surprise that I'm insanely attracted to the guy he got plastic surgery to look like-#speaking of.. he mentions being really handsome before surgery too.... I'm slightly curious tbh#but how do i bring that up in casual conversation- + he mentions that any pictures or anything related to his old life have been destroyed#ah well. i love him so much anyway! no biggie. though it is an interesting thing that this ship explores. ash kinda realizing that there's#always gonna be a part of him that she doesn't know. whether it be who he was before or things relating to his... occupation#he keeps it far from her. they love each other and they're very much an adorable couple but like.#something something falling in love with a hitman and the body double of a literal mob boss- ash is literally just some civilian#she owns and runs a bar called Sunset btw! super cool! she has a karaoke machine + lots of bunchan plushies at her bar. loves it there!#Sunset is her pride and joy. j.oongi go visit!!!#anyways this post got so sidetracked. sorry pals i cannot shut up when i talk about J.oongi H.an my beloved <3#hearing him say my name... i remember blushing so hard and setting down the controller after seeing this in-game..#ash.. his ash.. his voice.. his voice is so pretty too!!!!!! i think he's my only y.akuza f/o in which i like his dub voice better#his jpn voice is great and all but that's too y.akuza 6 j.oongi to me! dub voice is my Boyfriend <3#ash... AGDKWGDNWGDNHWEH-
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ismyteadoneyet · 3 months ago
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How fortunate am I to have so many Things to love and be excited about, to appreciate and look forward to?
Things I feel so strongly about that they stumble into my mind, univited, at random times of the day? Things that spill into my speech and vocabulary without me noticing? Things that impact my vision to the point where everywhere I look, everywhere I go, I see ghosts of them?
How lucky am I to have so many Things I love and cherish enough for them to reshape my very person, change my beliefs and make me grow? Things that make my own loved ones see the Things out in the wild, and go out of their way to make sure I see them too?
How wonderful is it that I have Things that I love so much that the very act is deemed and dubbed "not normal", making my love for them seem like it's more than they are supposed to recieve? An out-of-the-ordinary and above-the-norm appreciation for the Things that make the people around me shake their heads, call me "silly".
My dear, beloved Things, may I always stay silly for you ❤️
#yes this is yet another post about legendborn lmao#but also one of my friends sent me a post with a reminder to log into Genshin today#just to get the birthday-greeting card for one of my/my favorite character#and they send me this because even though it's my favorite character#this person also knows I don't actually play genshin that much and knows that I would probably miss it if they didn't remind me 🥺🥺#and my friends let me yap about Legendborn the other day lol#and my fellow legendbornian-in-crime commented on my insta story about annotating the book that “noone loves this series more than you”#which ofc isn't *TRUE* true but it still made me feel all fuzzy lol#my parents also got me a few sets of silver earrings for christmas bcs I mentioned in passing I wanted more silver jewelry#and one of the pairs they got me was with owls because Owl City has been one of my favorite artists since forever#and I THRIVED in 2012-fashion bcs the owl jewelry was fkn EVERYWHERE and I got SO MANY because it made me think of Owl City lol#and my brother got me The Book Of Bill bcs both he and I love Gravity Falls SO MUCH#I just love ✨️ loving ✨️ things I guess#so this post is very much a love letter to my special interests and hyperfixations <333#currently have had 'Tears Run Dry' by Patrik Jean on repeat for the past 2 or so days bcs it's fkn STUNNING#but it also makes me think about my friend's ArleFuri fic bcs it just fits so welll 😭😭#and at the same time (and the reason I have it so within reach lol) is bcs I have added it to an OC's playlist for a story I'm writing#I have so damn many things I love and I almost start crying thinking about how fortunate I am to have all these things I love so dearly#and live in a time where all of these things exist and I get to experience them all at a moment's notice#and just simply get to indulge in fandom behaviour and have people around me who also LET ME do that#i love hearing people yap about what they're passionate about regardless if I know what it is or not#like how beautiful isnt it to see someone's eyes sparkle and looking like they're itching all over because they simply can't help it#they just can't contain their love and passion for the Thing ??? absolutely incredible#tove rambles#oh and don't fkn get me started on how 'Dream Catcher' by Set It Off basically is the reason I'm so determined to become one#and it being part of how I made my 17-year old self believe I could actually do what I CURRENTLY DO nearly 10 years later
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true-blue-sonic · 5 months ago
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The 'only one bed' trope wouldn't work with either Espilver or Sonilver.
Espio would insist that Silver takes the bed because he can just sleep on the floor in meditation pose.
Sonic would insist that Silver takes the bed because he can literally sleep anywhere, floor, window sill, on top of the table, it's whatever to him.
Silver would insist that either of them can take the bed because he's used to sleep on hard floors, so it's no big deal.
If anything, Silver would probably end up sleeping on the floor with his crush/boyfriend instead of sleeping in the same bed with them.
Sonic would know memes, wouldn't he? I can imagine him just go like "So there really is only one bed" *sagely nod* while Silver stands behind him like "??????? Just get in there and sleep???" and then the bickering about who goes where commences XD I think Silver's argument is that he can just fly, so why would he need the bed? Flying in the air sounds far more comfortable than either sitting meditating or laying on the floor or furniture. But I can imagine all three of them just gallantly trying to offer their companion the bed, with as conclusion indeed being no-one takes it. Silver's got plenty of pride and a desire to help people, so I don't think he could be convinced to go sleep in the bed, haha. But him and either Sonic or Espio floating above the bed, Sonic/Espio snuggled in his arms while they both rest, is a cute thought! <3
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futuretrain · 1 year ago
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having kara zor-el thoughts today about her getting out of her ship, and she does not yet know what she is doing so years after she was supposed to. she is trying to focus not on what she's lost, but what she still has, and her first thought is "kal can't sleep without a lullaby, i need to find him and sing him to sleep, he must be so scared and alone" because she is scared, she is alone, she wants nothing more than for someone to sing her to sleep, but it will never happen again, and if she amounts to anything now that the future she was supposed to have is gone, she will do it for her little cousin, who will never even know krypton if not for her
but her cousin is not the little baby she used to babysit, he is a grown adult, older than kara is, and she wonders how the people who took care of him got him to sleep without knowing the kryptonian lullabies he was used to (how will she sleep now?), how quickly kal adapted to the lullabies of earth instead (did he forget the sound of his home entirely?), or who she would have to sing to sleep now that kal-el doesn't need her (who can she ever share with? will she forget, too?)
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i think i cried like twenty times playing through Ultima Thule and the ending of Endwalker 🥲🥲 i love them all so much
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kirbyddd · 1 year ago
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ok that was a new one
#trying to fall asleep half falling asleep and then instantly waking up in a cosmically dissociative state#that was not ok. it can't start happening to me without an adverse reaction to treatment ...#i can't remember when the other time in my life i experience a similar thing was....#one part of the brain fully awake but an entire other part still asleep and the rest conscious without it (NOT supposed to happen)#hellish stuff maan not ok not ok#i looked at my hands and recognized and understood them... but also recognized and understood the arbitrariness of their shape and number#and of the form of my mind and perception and place in time and errything.#cmon man you're only supposed to do that to people on random drugs not overstressed ppeople tryin to frickin sleep 😭#fuckin worst anxiety attack in a long LONG while fuckin hell.#i had to walk and wait for the rest of my brain to wake up and start perceiving so i could fuckin have the rest of my human context back#like where do you even hide man when the rest of your mind isn't there to run back to. it's like being stripped under the eye of sauron#the zones of my brain are too frickin detached and desynchronized i need to be neurologically sewn back together#i experienced temporary (~hourlong in ebbs and waves) broca's aphasia at treatment the other week. wild. and not ok#im gonna try tms again i think. it wasn't a silver bullet for me but it did help repair my cognition and memory and coherency for a bit...#til i lost it again at least#i miss josette. i played her game when rising on the brief crest of tms before my exhaustion started outweighing the few improvements#I'll revisit josette and sedona blue if i do that treatment again. J1 is too much of a slog to replay but J2 is a timeless precious gem#tms is so painful though it shocks my neuralgia#but im desperate i guess#ahahaahhh i need helppp. i ain bin this screwed since 2020 i think
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avionvadion · 11 months ago
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Someone stop me I’m already typing support convo ideas for Irene and Robin in my google doc fic notes 😖😫🫠 what switch in my brain flipped and how that it made me simp for this man overnight???
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All I remember is thinking how funny it would be if Irene summoned Grima and he became her begrudging Bestie but then what if she summoned the wrong Robin instead of OG!Henry’s Robin and now it’s gotten so out of hand and WHY AM I SIMPING FOR ROBIN.
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fantastic-mr-corvid · 1 year ago
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Dog Days Are Over by Florence + the Machine Elena anamatic... oughhhh.... its fucking perfect for the year before Elena leaves, with the dog days being over [shes gonna leave soon] but the horses are coming [everything going to shit for everyone else] and shes got to run far away from those she loves to outrun the horses [but shes got her own challenges to face once shes got out...]
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cosmosarcana · 2 months ago
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Hu5h
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brewscoop · 9 months ago
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fushitoru · 4 months ago
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i don't wanna lose this with you a spiderman gojo fic
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pairing ⸺ spiderman!gojo x reader
summary ⸺ an amalgation of misunderstandings and stress lead to a very big fight between you and satoru, but you certainly don't expect the way he wins you back.
warnings ⸺ college au, spiderman!au, angst, hurt/comfort, i warn you reader might infurate you, but she's just a woman in stem :(, tooth rotting fluff bc he's a loser for his gf, not edited sue me
playlist ⸺ quantum rizzics
a/n you'll probably need to read the first installation (nsfw, so mdni) to understand this one :3
general masterlist | spiderman!gojo m. list
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you've blocked gojo on all platforms.
you don't really remember what caused the "break up" (you didn't really break up). maybe it's the fact that you've been stressed about grad school admissions, your dorm's floor was covered in his boxers, and he's never been able to visit you pre-3am these days. somehow, the city's criminals are determined to keep your boyfriend away from you, and maybe it was your pms, or maybe it was truly just because satoru is annoying. regardless, it's when you guys have plans that's not an impromptu healing-gojo's-wounds-in-your-dorm-at-3am sesh and you're waiting at the coffee shop that you explode.
because he was supposed to arrive ten minutes ago, and when you move to go to the bathroom, you see him. through the window, his white hair is never not noticeable, and who you see next to him makes you falter.
he's standing next to a girl with blue tinted silver hair that you recognize as mei mei, and she's gripping his upper arm as she smiles while looking at his face, his lips with such fuck me eyes that you could tell they were having some sort of intimate conversation.
and if it were an ideal day, you would know that it's all a misunderstanding, you would know your boyfriend is someone you trust. but, again, the cards were stacked against you, and the only things that go through your mind all make your eyes all glossy. he's late to the one date that you planned because you and him were finally free at the same time and you've been busy because you've been desperately applying for internships because unlike your boyfriend you don't have a plethora of papers and coding experience and you've been getting four hours of sleep on average this week and ugh you've heard a rumor that satoru used to hook up with her and fuck now your tampon is poking at you in the wrong way—
great. now tears are fully streaming down your cheeks. in public.
as you rush to the table where your stuff is your vision is so blurry that you also almost fall flat on your face as you stumble over the legs of chairs and tables. blurting out a ensemble of choked up sorry's and excuse me's you hurriedly gather your laptop and notebooks in your backpack and book it for the exit.
the biting cold stings at your face, but you nevertheless determinedly move in the opposite direction of where satoru and mei mei are situated, praying your boyfriend doesn't recognize you. however, it seems that the heavens are working against you because you hear a yelled "baby?"
you don't look back because you know a new set of tears will leave your eyes, and with it being finals season, you're not very hydrated to being with. but you hear footsteps running towards you and fuck your boyfriend's long ass legs because he quickly catches up to you. then, he grabs your hands, attempting to stop you from running away and face him.
"baby," he breathes, baby blue eyes looking into yours as he moves to kiss your forehead. you stay silent, pinning your gaze to the ground while shivering. "where are you going? aren't we supposed to hang out right now?"
look, you and gojo have a good relationship. but recently, things have gotten...strenuous lately. you guys haven't been communicating, and it might not help that half of your calorie intake was from energy drinks. or perhaps what lead you to say what you said next was driven entirely by the brain eating mold on your unwashed dishes, but dumb excuses aside, you sneer. "shouldn't you be busy doing that with mei mei, instead?"
a small part of you--the part that knows you shouldn't be like this--feels relief that hurt doesn't immediately flash across his eyes, only confusion. but lack of sleep has not only stripped away at your sanity but also your people pleasing and overthinking tendencies, leaving you only as a girl frustrated, even irrationally angry, with her boyfriend. so you only avert your gaze when he dumbfoundedly asks, "what?"
"what do you mean, "what?"" you scoff, wrenching your hand from his grasp. "you were ten minutes late to our meet-up, gojo." it is at your use of his last name, instead of your sweet my love, that the hurt you've been looking for flashes across his eyes. he moves to speak but you cut him off, no longer wishing to be here with him. "if you're so busy talking to bitches you hooked up with before, why did you even bother saying yes to hanging out with me?"
he looks at you in confusion, eyes quickly flitting back and forth across you. then, slowly, as if he's still processing the weight of your accusations, he says, "i don't exactly know what you're referring to, but let's calm down---"
and you see red.
"calm down?" you snap, voice sharp and icy, just like the wind stinging your cheeks. "did you seriously just tell me to calm down? you were late again, gojo, and i find you chatting it up with her?" you practically spit the word, arms crossing as a flimsy defense against both the cold and the ache building in your chest.
satoru blinks, his confusion genuine, but you’re too far gone to care. "wait—mei mei? is this about mei mei? she's not—"
"don’t you dare finish that sentence," you cut him off, your voice rising as your blood boils hotter. "i don't want to hear how she's just a friend, or how it's not what it looks like. i’m so tired of hearing the same bullshit excuses."
"baby, you're jumping to conclusions—"
"and you’re jumping at the chance to look like an idiot in public," you snap, your hands trembling now, either from the cold or your rising fury. "god, what do you even say to her? let me guess, you go around telling girls you're spider-man to get into their pants, huh? bet that works like a charm."
the accusation hits like a slap, and for the first time, satoru looks genuinely stunned, his mouth falling open slightly. "what the hell are you even saying right now?"
"am i wrong?" you let out a bitter laugh, one that echoes in the frosty air. "you’re late to the one date i actually planned, and i see you with her, all cozy, like i’m not even waiting for you. like i don’t even matter."
his eyebrows knit together, frustration mixing with something softer. "you seriously think i’d—"
"i don’t know what to think anymore, satoru!" the words burst out of you, your voice cracking as hot tears well in your eyes. "all i know is that i can’t keep feeling like this. like i’m some afterthought while you’re out doing—whatever it is you do. swinging through the city or flirting with your exes or—" you choke on the words, wiping at your cheeks furiously as the tears spill over. "just forget it. i’m done."
"wait." his voice is quieter now, more desperate as he steps toward you, his hand reaching out. "baby, come on, we can talk about this—"
"no," you say firmly, jerking your hand away before he can grab it. "i’m blocking you. on everything." then, mockingly, "you can figure out how to save the world without me."
his eyes widen, his mouth opening like he’s about to plead or argue, but you don’t wait for him to speak. you turn on your heel and storm away, the cold wind biting at your skin as the lump in your throat grows heavier.
you don’t look back. not when he calls your name, not when you hear his footsteps falter. you just keep walking.
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it’s 3 a.m., and you don’t know if you exist.
well, you do, but after how light you feel after you’ve cried a disgusting amount, you just lie down on your floor staring at the ceiling and contemplating the meaning of life. or more specifically, the meaning of your life, which right now feels like it’s revolving around nothing but stress and a breakup you don’t even fully understand.
you wouldn’t be having these problems if you were a childless cat lady.
but alas, you’re just a college student. in the few days where you haven’t seen satoru, you’ve finished all your finals—miraculously, considering the fragile state of your emotional wellbeing—and now you’re finally on break in your dorm. you’re supposed to go back home in two days, but the thought of packing feels like trying to climb a mountain barefoot. you can’t summon the energy to do anything except wallow in your self-pity and selfishness, letting it wrap around you like a weighted blanket that’s somehow comforting and suffocating all at once.
you’d like to say this is rock bottom, but truthfully, it’s worse than that. because rock bottom implies a kind of finality—a place to push off from. this? this feels more like you’re sinking in quicksand, the weight of everything dragging you further down.
in your stress and impulsiveness, you’ve managed to kill your entire grind for internships. deadlines have slipped past while you spent hours doom-scrolling job boards and second-guessing every application. the ambitious, career-focused version of yourself feels like a stranger now, buried under the weight of your own doubts and insecurities. and on top of that, you may have potentially lost the love of your life.
it’s laughable, really, how thoroughly you’ve managed to self-destruct in such a short time. the worst part? you can’t even bring yourself to check your socials. if you unblock him and see there aren’t any messages, you think your heart might shatter completely. which, if you’re being honest, isn’t exactly fair to him. you’re the one who had the meltdown. you’re the one who blocked him on everything. he probably doesn’t even know what he did wrong because you didn’t even communicate anything.
your stomach twists at the thought, guilt mingling with the ever-present ache of missing him. he was supposed to be the one person who made everything feel a little less impossible, and now you’ve pushed him away.
there has got to be a taylor swift song for this.
so you make your way to your spotify account to listen to afterglow, putting in your airpods while somberly looking at the ceiling once again as the lyrics fill your ears. tears well up as soon as the lyrics start
i blew things out of proportion, now you're blue⸻
tears well up before you can stop them, hot and heavy as they trail down your cheeks. god, you’re a mess. and yet, as much as you hate it, you can’t seem to stop the flood of thoughts that follow.
you miss him. you miss the way he made you laugh even when you were on the verge of tears, the way his ridiculous confidence somehow made you feel like everything would work out. you miss how he’d stay up late just to facetime you when you were overwhelmed with schoolwork, how he always seemed to know exactly when you needed him most.
and now? now you’ve gone and ruined it. maybe he’s angry, maybe he’s hurt, or worse—maybe he’s just done with you entirely.
the thought makes your chest ache, your breaths coming in shallow and uneven as the lyrics hit their crescendo.
i need to say, hey, it’s all me, in my head—
then, suddenly the song changes. you frown as you hear early 2010's pop blast through your ears.
i threw a wish in the well, don't ask me i'll never tell⸻
why the fuck is call me maybe playing?
annoyed and rubbing at your eyes, you move the change it back to, now, the sad girl hours playlist spotify curated for your and assume your dead fish position on the floor once again.
however, it seems as if your spotify is genuinely tweaking, like it's realized it’s gotten your attention. when call me maybe starts playing again, you groan out loud and move your phone. but before you have a chance to switch the song again, it seems to switch.
baby by justin bieber.
call me, blondie.
i love you, i'm sorry, gracie abrams.
letstalkaboutit, aminé.
i don't understand but i luv you, seventeen.
please please please, sabrina carpenter.
and then, once more, as if to really drive the point home: call me maybe, carly rae jepsen.
again, it's 3am, and you're stuck in a surreal mix of grief and confusion, staring at your phone as your spotify queue seems to have gained sentience. each song feels like a pleading nudge, an unmistakable pattern forming, and your blood runs cold when you remember one very important fact.
you share a spotify account with satoru.
"carly rae jepsen," you mutter under your breath, a mix of exasperation and fondness bubbling up despite yourself. he's hijacking your queue. right in the middle of your emo songs.
you sit up abruptly, tossing your airpods onto the bed, and hover over the call button on your phone. there’s a split second of hesitation—your pride battling with your longing—before you give in and press it.
the line rings twice before his voice comes through, breathless, like he’s been pacing. "baby?"
the sound of his voice sends a fresh wave of emotion crashing over you, sharp and raw like an open wound. the sound of his voice makes your stomach twist uncomfortably, equal parts relief and guilt. "satoru," you say, barely above a whisper. "why are you messing with our spotify?"
"why am i messing with our spotify?" he echoes, his tone incredulous. "why did you block me on literally everything? what was i supposed to do—send you a letter by carrier pigeon?"
you wince at the edge in his voice, your earlier anger wilting under the weight of his hurt. "i… i don’t know," you admit, the words tumbling out before you can catch them. "i was upset, and i wasn’t thinking straight. i shouldn’t have done that."
"yeah, you shouldn’t have," he says, still sounding a little indignant, though there’s something softer beneath it now. "do you know how many songs i had to go through to make my point? do you know how hard it was to resist the urge to rickroll you instead?" then, there’s a pause on his end, the line suddenly feeling too quiet. then he sighs, his voice softening into something that feels too much like an apology. "i didn���t know what else to do. i hate not talking to you. i hate knowing i made you upset, even if i don’t entirely understand why."
you close your eyes, the lump in your throat returning with a vengeance. the silence stretches between you, thick and unbearable, until you finally break it. "i’m sorry," you whisper, the words slipping out before you can stop them. "i shouldn’t have blown up at you like that.” and now that the dam has been broken, it all comes rushing out as you start choking up. “i’ve just been so stressed, and i’ve been missing you and then i saw you with her and then got irrationally angry when i really should’ve trusted you and oh my god i’m like a possessive tradwife husband that doesn’t let you leave the farm i’m sorry and i didn’t even communicate before i blew up at you like that—”
"hey. hey, hey, it’s okay," he says immediately, his tone filled with an earnestness that makes your chest tighten. "i know things have been hard for you. i should’ve been better, too. more present. i hate that you’ve been feeling like this while i’ve been...doing spider-man things." then, he lets out a dramatic sigh, the kind that’s equal parts exasperation and playfulness. "but wasn’t fair,” and you can hear a whine in his voice, “you blocked me and then ghosted me like i’m some kind of random tinder match. do you have any idea how insane i felt when i couldn’t even check to see if you were okay? i thought you hated me."
your breath catches at his words, guilt twisting like a knife in your chest. "i don’t hate you," you say quickly, the words spilling out in a rush. "i could never hate you. i was just… stupid, and emotional, and i didn’t know how to handle everything piling up. i’m so, so sorry, satoru."
there’s a pause, and when he speaks again, his voice is quieter, a little more vulnerable. "then why did you say those things? about mei mei, and… and me using the spider-man thing to get into girls’ pants."
you bite your lip, the memory of your harsh words making your throat tighten. "i didn’t mean any of it," you whisper. "i was just lashing out, and i know it wasn’t fair to you. i know you’d never do something like that, and i trust you, satoru. i just… i let my insecurities get the better of me."
"wait," he interrupts, his voice laced with amusement that shouldn’t make your heart ache the way it does. "you actually think i’d use the spider-man thing as a pickup line? that’s...wow. that’s genius. i should write that down."
"satoru!" you exclaim, half-laughing, half-crying, your emotions unraveling all over again. "i’m being serious!"
"i know, i know," he says, but you can hear the smile in his voice, warm and teasing. "and i’m being serious, too. i’d never do that to you. mei mei���s just...she tripped in front of me, i was just helping her up. i didn’t even realize how it must’ve looked, but i’ve never done anything with her. you’re it for me, okay? always."
you sniffle, wiping at your cheeks as your heart swells and aches all at once. "you mean that?"
"of course i do," he says, his voice soft and sincere in a way that makes your breath hitch. "i love you, even when you block me on everything and make me resort to spotify warfare." he sighs again, but this time it’s softer, the warmth in his voice breaking through his remaining irritation. "i’m not mad. i mean, i was mad, but mostly i was just upset. you really hurt my feelings, you know?"
the lump in your throat grows, your guilt threatening to choke you. "i know," you say, your voice cracking. "i’m so sorry, satoru. i’ll make it up to you, i promise."
"oh, you will make it up to me," he says, the teasing edge returning to his tone. "i want a week of boyfriend privileges—no complaining when i steal your fries, no making fun of my movie picks, and you’re buying me snacks for at least three of those days."
a small smile tugs at your lips despite the tears still clinging to your lashes. "deal," you say softly.
there’s a pause on his end, and then his voice comes through the line, quieter but no less sincere. "you really mean it? you’re not still mad at me?"
"i’m not mad," you say, your voice thick with emotion. "i was never really mad at you, satoru. i was mad at everything else, and i took it out on you. but i’m not mad anymore. i just… i miss you."
"i miss you too," he says, and the raw honesty in his voice---the subtle way it chokes up, as if he had been crying and missing you too---makes your chest ache. "so, can i come over? or are you going to make me keep hijacking your playlists to get your attention?"
you laugh softly, the sound tinged with relief. "just come over already, you dummy. and bring snacks. good ones."
"done," he says, his grin audible through the phone. "i’ll be there in twenty. and for the record, you owe me at least a whole playlist dedicated to how amazing i am and you sucking the absolute soul out of my dick---."
"don’t push your luck," you reply, but there’s no heat in your words, only warmth (and you’re absolutely going to suck his soul out of his cock). regardless, for the first time in days, the tightness in your chest starts to ease, replaced by something lighter, something whole.
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general masterlist | spiderman!gojo m. list
a/n he's so cute :( i'll keep on writing stuff for them whether it be small fics like this or long ass fics. i think my next one is gonna be freaky if you guys are nice to this one
TAGLIST im really sorry if i missed you if you sent an ask asking to be tagged pls feel free to remind me again im afriad ur ask has drowned in my shitposts and other asks
@chilichopsticks @livelaughloveisagiyoichi @moonchhu @k0z3me @seobluv
@m1gota @celloccino @satxoru @fishrene @myahfig4
@watermelonmuntchers @bxnfire @ayumilk @venussdovess @michelleeveline
@bochichi @applepi25 @6xillaa @almostdifferentstudent @mugamoo
@iv-vee @jaemissso @wil10wthetree @localartisttttt @rirk-ke
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@gojodickbig @kyon-cherri @nikkissecretlibrary @omg-its-rdj @isleqt
@suguruscousin @idkwhatursayinh @yourfavbabigirl
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nereidprinc3ss · 10 months ago
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be my angel
in which BAU fem!reader was injured on the job, but is refusing painkillers at the hospital. spencer thinks he knows why.
fluff (+a little angst) warnings/tags: established relationship, hospital stuff, reader got beat up by an unsub, discussions of spencer's past addiction, mentions of period cramps, reader ends up being administered some sort of painkiller a/n: another draft i found in my literal hundreds of pages of abandoned wips and fixed up cause it's cute, I hope you like!!!
Spencer is tearing through the hospital. They all keep saying you’re going to be okay, but what does that even mean? Why is nobody telling him anything? He’s not even sure he heard what the orderly at the front desk said, but his feet are carrying him with a strident purpose through the winding white halls, so he has to assume he at least subconsciously knows where he’s going. 
Finally he spots Penelope, a beacon in her candy-colored clothing, speaking to a doctor in hushed tones. Penelope sees him approaching and turns away from the doctor, looking harried and exhausted. 
“Is she okay? What happened?” Spencer demands, before either of the others can say a word. 
“She’s okay,” the doctor assures. “She was beat up pretty bad—concussion, broken ribs, some bruising that looks worse than it is. There was a clean shot through her arm, but—” 
His blood runs cold. Nobody told him you were shot. Why had nobody told him you were shot? 
“I need to see her.” 
The doctor frowns, glancing between the two agents. 
“I’m sorry, are you her spouse?” 
“Yes. No, not yet, I just—I need to see her, please. Now.” 
“Sir, unless she—” 
“Just let him see her!” Penelope practically yells. “She wants him here, believe me.”  
The doctor clenches her jaw and scribbles something on her clipboard. 
“Okay. Maybe you can try to convince her to accept some painkillers.” 
Spencer’s frown deepens. 
“She’s refusing pain management?” 
“We gave her as much ibuprofen as we could, but she refused anything stronger than that. She has to be in a lot of pain right now, and there’s no background of addiction.” 
“I’ll talk to her,” Spencer says, already twisting the silver door handle. He has a sneaking suspicion as to why you denied pain treatment, and it makes him feel incredibly guilty. More than he already did, after this entire debacle. 
The sight of you, bloodied and bruised and obviously suffering has his heart splintering right down the middle. Whatever meager semblance of a smile he can scrounge up and offer is reflected back to him on you—which only makes him feel worse. As always, you’re putting on a brave face. 
“Hey,” Spencer says quietly as he closes the door behind him. 
“Hi,” you croak. “How do I look?” 
He approaches, sitting on the edge of the bed and pushing your hair away from your face. 
“How do you feel? The doctor told me you wouldn’t accept pain medication,” he murmurs. 
You sniff. 
“I feel okay. Did she tell you it’s not as bad as it looks?” 
But your voice is so small, so wavery and weak, that he knows you’re lying. 
“Sweetheart...” 
You’ve been holding it together since the unsub beat you nearly unconscious. You held it together as he ran away, even got a couple shots in before he turned around and returned fire. You held it together while you sat against the dirty truck, bleeding out, not sure if your team was coming, and you held it together in the ambulance, and for the past thirty minutes in this hospital bed. But all it takes is one gentle word from Spencer, with that concerned, solicitous look in his eye, and the floodgates are opening. Tears spring up in your eyes and begin silently falling down your dirtied cheeks. 
“It’s okay!” you attempt to reassure him, affecting cheeriness even through the tears. “It doesn’t hurt. I’m fine!” 
He says your name soft and low and he tries his best to keep his tone even though he is liable to burst into tears or start yelling at someone (not you) at any minute.  
“I know that’s not true. You have broken ribs and a gunshot wound. I know how badly it hurts to breathe and how it feels every time you move your arm. That is too much damage for over-the-counter anti-inflammatories. You need real analgesics.” 
“I don’t,” you whisper. Your teary eyes make his whole body ache. He squeezes your hand—the one that’s not connected to the wounded arm. 
“Because of me?” You stare at him blankly, as if you’re shocked he was able to put two and two together. “I promise you don’t need to worry about that.” 
You sniffle. 
“But what if—what if they give me the drugs and I get all weird and it’s, it’s like... triggering for you, or something?” 
“It’s been a really long time since I’ve worried about that. I’d rather see you a little tired and out of it than in extreme pain and trying to pretend you’re not. You getting the pain relief you need in a medical emergency is not going to make me relapse.” 
“But I really think I could go without,” you begin, voice already tightening around a cry. “I’ve—I’ve had period cramps that were worse than this.” 
Despite himself, he chuckles. Goes back to stroking your hair. 
The laughter fades quickly. All the pain you’re in is so evident in your eyes. The dissociative glassiness, the tension around them, the bloodshot quality—he's seen it many times before, and he hates it on you. 
“Will you please tell them you’re ready to take something? They won’t give you Dilaudid. It’s too strong. They’ll give you something that I’d have no interest in anyway.” 
“Not funny,” you whisper. 
He ignores this. 
“Will you let me call the doctor back in?” 
You take a deep, shuddering breath—or at least, you try to, before you’re loosing a sharp squeak that deteriorates into a little sob. The ribs. 
Spencer doesn’t bother asking again, just gets up and begins to walk away as efficiently as his legs will carry him. You need painkillers and he thinks it might be fastest to just fetch the doctor or a nurse from the hallway. 
“Wait,” you plead.  
He stops. Reminds himself that you need him right now—not his medical opinions. Spencer turns back around and approaches again, crouching by your bedside this time. 
“What, honey?” 
“I don’t...” 
You trail off, overcome by something like fear in the width and shine and nervous dart of your eyes. Spencer knows, everybody at the BAU knows, that showing fear to a serial killer will get you killed that much quicker. During your time alone with the unsub, which is a can of worms Spencer literally cannot psychologically open right now, you had to put on your bravest face. Even while you were being beaten within an inch of your life. Even when you thought you were going to die, alone, and that your team—that Spencer—wasn't coming back for you. Because that’s the kind of thing you have to do to cope when you’re at rock bottom. But you were terrified. Petrified. That doesn’t just go away—and Spencer knows it’ll be bumping against the surface until it finds a way out.  
He has to remember that just because you look unafraid and you act unafraid doesn’t mean you aren’t. 
“You were so brave,” he manages after he’s sure he can say it without incident, swiping moisture from your cheek. “You did everything exactly right.” 
“I know,” you whisper, chin trembling. Spencer knows you, and he knows this kind of trauma well enough to know that you’re thinking, I did everything exactly right, and it wasn’t enough. I did everything exactly right and this is what I have to show for it. 
“But nobody needs you to act like it wasn’t hard, okay? You don’t need to pretend like it doesn’t hurt. You were so, so brave, angel. You don’t have to be brave anymore.” 
Your eyes squeeze shut, sending a new wash of tears over your tacky cheeks. A few moments pass. You say nothing. He hopes you’re not going to hide away inside yourself like he did. 
“Will you please, please, let me get the doctor?” 
At least this time you don’t immediately say no. 
“Will you come right back?” 
“Of course.” 
Finally, you nod your hesitant assent, and Spencer presses a careful kiss to your forehead. 
A few minutes later, the doctor—who was shocked that Spencer was able to so quickly change your very made-up mind—is back, and so is Spencer. It only takes a moment for them to determine the best course of action for you and soon the fist around his heart is loosening its grip as he watches some of the agony melting from your eyes. 
“Better?” he murmurs as the nurse who’d administered the drugs leaves, fanning his thumb over the underside of your wrist. You nod, already appearing sleepy. 
“Can you lie down with me?” 
He smiles at the way your words slip against each other, simply relieved that you’re able to relax and no longer in extreme pain. 
“Hospital beds aren’t rated for two people.” 
“Spencer.” 
It’s enough for him to climb onto the bed—not that he was ever going to deny you what you wanted to begin with. The fit isn’t exactly perfect—he's a bit too long and combined the two of you are just slightly too wide—but with some finagling it’s comfortable enough. Spencer has slipped his arm underneath you and your head is on his shoulder and he’s so glad to have you in his arms and so grateful that you’re okay he does something almost like praying in his head as he kisses your hair. 
“Hey. Ask me about my bruises.” 
“Why? Do they still hurt?” 
“You should see the other guy.” 
It’s dumb and it doesn’t make sense because you didn’t bother waiting for him to actually set the joke up—but he smiles dryly nonetheless. 
“Can you please give me... I don’t know, 36 hours before you start making jokes about almost dying?” 
“Clock starts now.” 
“Thank you.” He feels your lips curve into a half-conscious smile against his neck. It’s a wonderful feeling. “How are your ribs? Breathing feels okay?” 
“Mhm. Love breathing.” 
“Mhm. And your arm?” 
“Like I got shot.” 
“Well, that’s pretty much unavoidable. But not as bad as before, right?” 
“Right. Spencer?” 
“What, my love?” 
A little pleased puff of air warms his shoulder. He carefully rubs your hip. 
“Will you tell me how brave I was again?” 
He takes a silent, very deep breath.  
“You were incredibly brave. And smart, too. I’m really proud of you for how you handled that situation. I’m so sorry you had to go through that, but I don’t think anyone could have handled it better. Especially when you chose to stay put by the truck, instead of chase him. I know that wasn’t what you wanted to do, but it was the right choice.” 
“I thought you guys maybe weren’t coming,” you murmur, no hint of sadness in your smushed, flat voice—like you’re barely awake. “I waited half an hour and I thought you weren’t gonna find me.” 
“Angel, I will always find you. We didn’t stop looking even once, as soon as we noticed you were gone. I’m just sorry I wasn’t with Emily and Rossi when they got to you.” 
“’Nelope told me... she told me you got really angry and scary.” 
He stares at the ceiling and considers this. 
“I could see... how what I was feeling would be interpreted that way. I was pretty angry. But not at Penelope or any of them. I was mostly just scared.” 
“I’m sorry I scared you,” you whisper. “And I’m sorry if I made you mad.” 
“You did not. I wasn’t mad at you. And it’s not your fault that I got scared. You were just trying to do your job. None of this is your fault.” 
“She also said that you said fuck like... three times.” 
“Mm... doesn’t sound like me,” he evades. You giggle, and the sound is more a relief than any drug he could take.
“No, seriously, I’m so mad I missed it. I love hearing you swear. Tell me what you said—and you have to cause I’m all messed up so I get whatever I want.” 
He sighs in mock annoyance. 
“Well, she’s wrong. I only said fuck once. I used fucking as an intensifier twice.” 
You hum. 
“Sexy.” 
“Alright,” Spencer laughs, flushing as he moves his hand to your shoulder. “Go to sleep before I tell them to up your dosage, weirdo.” 
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greenhillguy · 1 year ago
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tag drop ✌️
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sushiyuzu · 6 months ago
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sleepy sylus
warning: fluff + tension — eepy sylus moment! 💤
- second acc: @blushpawss
you walk into sylus’s office late at night, expecting him to still be working. but as you step inside, you see him slouched over at his desk, his head resting on his arms, fast asleep. his silver hair falls messily over his forehead, and for a moment, he looks so peaceful. you can’t help but smile, thinking about how rare it is to see him like this—relaxed, without his usual guarded expression.
so cute. you smile softly, careful not to wake him up from his slumber.
quietly, you grab a blanket from the nearby couch and drape it over his broad shoulders, hoping to keep him warm without waking him. just as you’re about to turn and leave, his hand suddenly reaches out, grabbing your wrist. you freeze, feeling the warmth of his touch, your heart skipping a beat.
uh oh.
“you’re not going anywhere,” sylus mumbles in a low, sleepy voice, his crimson eyes cracking open just enough to glance up at you. the tiredness in his voice makes it sound deeper than usual, sending a shiver down your spine.
“sylus, you should get some rest,” you whisper, trying to keep your voice soft. “you’ve been working all day.”
he doesn’t let go of your wrist, though. instead, he pulls you closer, his grip gentle but firm, guiding you down onto his lap. you let out a small gasp, your hands instinctively landing on his chest as you straddle him. the sudden closeness makes your heart race, and you can feel his warmth seeping through his shirt.
“i’ll rest... if you stay,” he murmurs, his lips brushing against your ear as he speaks. the heat of his breath sends a wave of warmth over your skin, and you can’t help but lean into him, your body melting into his. his arms wrap around your waist, holding you in place, as if he’s afraid you might slip away.
“sylus...” you start, but your words trail off as he shifts beneath you, his hands sliding down to rest on your hips. there’s something possessive in the way he holds you, even though he’s half-asleep. his head rests against your shoulder now, his silver hair tickling your neck, and you can feel the rise and fall of his chest with each slow breath he takes.
you’re not sure if it’s the quiet of the night or the way he’s holding you so close, but the air between you suddenly feels heavier. your heart is pounding, and your body reacts before your mind can catch up. you gently run your fingers through his hair, brushing it away from his face, and he lets out a soft hum of approval, his lips grazing the skin of your neck.
“you shouldn’t work yourself so hard,” you whisper, trying to focus on anything but the growing heat between you. but it’s impossible to ignore the way his hands grip you a little tighter, or the way his lips barely brush against your skin, leaving a trail of warmth in their wake.
“it’s hard to focus on work... when you’re around, sweetie.” he murmurs, his voice a little more awake now, but still laced with that deep, sleepy tone that makes your stomach flutter. his hands slide up your back, pulling you even closer until there’s no space left between you. you can feel the heat of his body against yours, his breath hot against your skin.
you let out a shaky breath, your hands gripping his shoulders as his lips finally press fully against your neck. the sensation sends a jolt through your body, and you can’t stop the soft moan that escapes your lips. sylus chuckles softly, the sound vibrating through your skin, and his hands move to cup your face, tilting your head slightly so he can look at you.
“you look good like this,” he says, his crimson eyes heavy with sleep but filled with something else now—something that makes your heart race even faster.
“sylus...” you whisper again, but your voice is barely more than a breath as his lips move closer to yours. the moment stretches out between you, charged with the quiet tension of the night, and then, finally, his lips meet yours. the kiss is slow, unhurried, as if he’s savoring the moment, and you feel yourself sinking deeper into him, your hands tangling in his silver hair.
his lips are soft but firm, guiding yours with a quiet confidence that leaves you breathless. and even though the kiss is gentle, there’s a possessiveness behind it, a quiet reminder of the way he always seems to be in control, even now. his hands move down to your waist again, pulling you tighter against him, and you can feel the hard planes of his body pressed against yours.
when he finally pulls away, you’re left panting, your head spinning from the intensity of the moment. sylus rests his forehead against yours, his breath coming out in slow, steady puffs as he tries to calm himself.
“i think i could get used to this,” he says quietly, a hint of a smirk playing at the corners of his lips.
you laugh softly, shaking your head. “you should be sleeping.”
“i will,” he murmurs, his hands still resting on your hips. “as long as you stay right here.”
with that, he pulls you closer once again, and this time, you don’t resist. you settle against him, your head resting on his shoulder as his arms wrap around you protectively. his heartbeat is slow and steady beneath you, and it doesn’t take long before the warmth of his body and the quiet rhythm of his breathing lull you into a peaceful sleep.
and just before you drift off, you hear his voice, soft and low in the quiet room.
“i’ll always keep you close.”
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