#sickly little guy moment...... (me any time i try to eat literally anything)

[b-blushes]

in a rare move for me next week i'm gonna try NEW RECIPE it is called 'sloppy-joe stuffed peppers with wedges' which is a name i Do Not Like but essentially it's peppers stuffed with turkey mince 👍 Never had any success with that before (turkey mince) and i've gotta substitute a bunch of ingredients hahaha BUT hopefully the gist of it is there and it will make a delicious meal.........

i will report back, hopefully victorious...... o7

[honeybunnybeez]

Duuuude. Sfw alphabet for Eret or Bad??? Or even Fundy. All very underrated and I need see much content for them -⚰️

SFW alphabet:

C!BadBoyHalo:

♡Reader is Gender Neutral!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Bad is pretty affectionate when it comes to you, almost never leaving your side if he can.

He's very affectionate physically and verbally, clinging to you and giving you kisses while calling you sickly sweet pet names and praising you. Despite what he's supposed to be, he's incredibly adorable and hard to resist.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

The friendship starts after you're introduced to him thanks to Skeppy, who you met first around the server and clicked well with. After getting to know you better and seeing you get along great with Skeppy, he easily accepts you as one of his close friends.

As a best friend he's kinda clingy, often wanting to see you and knowing what you're up to. He also likes to make sure you're okay and comes to visit you often, making sure no one messes with you.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Cuddles are his jam and given the opportunity you two would probably never leave the bed for the whole day. He doesn't have a set cuddling style, though one thing stays the same and it's that he wraps his arms around you pretty tight.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He does seem like the type to want to settle down. It sounds like a very nice thing to do once everything in the server calms down, well, if it ever does calm down.

Domestic life wise, he's pretty decent at it! His best chore is cooking, he makes a pretty good meal when he cooks.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Depending on the situation and what led up to it, I think it'd end on good terms but he would get very emotional while doing so. He would be crying while apologizing and explaining why he feels like a romantic relationship wouldn't work as to not hurt you too severely. He still wants you to be in his life as his best friend though so you two do keep in close contact if you're okay with that.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He is rather loyal and commited to the ones he loves so I think he would get married. Maybe after being together for 6 months or a year would be when he pops the question.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He is very physically and emotionally gentle with you, not wanting to hurt you in any way.

Sure he does tackle hug you in his human form but in his demon form with his tall height he makes sure to treat you like glass if he ever handles or holds you.

Emotionally he doesn't ever want to say mean things to you. He always apologizes profusely (almost crying himself) if you ever get truly upset with something he teased you about.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Loves hugs, the moment he sees you he's running up to give you a big old hug. Hug him back, please. Please, (y/n). Hug him back, he wants you to.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

He used to say it quite often back when you two were friends, so there's no exact way to tell when the I love you's started to be genuine.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Lord above, we've seen this man be jealous. He's super jealous when you start to spend more time with others. Can and will blow up your communicator asking you where you are and who you're with. Sometimes Skeppy joins in too half jokingly. If you're with Quackity you bet your ass you're getting dragged somewhere far away from the man.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Loves giving you surprise kisses and half expects you to return the gesture. ESKIMO KISSES! All the eskimo kisses, he loves them. He love giving and receiving eskimo kisses from you so much.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Oh he adores kids quite a bit. Innocent, active and still full of life, he thinks they're precious. Though he can't really handle the spoiled ones, the ones who scream and throw really bad tantrums when they don't get what they want in the supermarket.

I don't think he's capable of having his own kids with his partner (being a demon and all) but he'd like to adopt one or two if you're into that idea. He's had experience raising Sapnap (and he doesn't hate bad's guts as far as I remember) so he's sure he can handle it.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Before you wake up he likes to stare at your peaceful face while you rest. At first you did get a bit surprised when you wake up to see a pair of dimly glowing eyes staring back at you so closely. Now, you just instinctively reach out to give him morning kisses when you wake up.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

He holds you in his arms while you slowly drift off to sleep. Sometimes he hums a soft happy tune while playing with your hair as your eyes grow heavy.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Skeppy totally tells you a few of Bad's secrets before you two started dating, only very minor ones though. Other than that, he's a pretty open book and if there was a secret he has he spills pretty easily when you say his name in a dissapointed tone.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Unless you insult him or swear like a sailor on purpose to annoy him, he has a good bit of patience with you and your shenanigans. If you're best friends with Skeppy then you're bound to get into a little bit of trouble.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He remembers things about you quite well. Such as what you like to eat, what your favourite ore is, your schedule, etc.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He loves you and he loves his best friend Skeppy too. He enjoys every moment you guys are all together but his favourite moment was when you three all hung out with one another watching the sunset on the roof of your home. It was all so unsually calm during those few minutes. You 3 totally held hands, just saying.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He knows you can hold your own but even so he does get pretty defensive when others try to threaten you. Will stab a person for you if they really hurt you, no hesitation.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He puts in a lot of effort to make you and everyone happy! It doesn't always feel like a chore when he's trying to find something you like or helping you around here and there. Anniversaries with him are simple but they're very sweet and memorable.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Oh boy, his clinginess and jealousy does tend to be a bit of a problem. You have to remind him that you need personal time too. He always pouts when you say that and often times you do give in because of it. Though, if you really do need to be somewhere without him, promise to spend your next free day with him and he'll happily agree.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Not very concerned, he's aware that he looks a lot different than others but he doesn't think it matters when almost everyone in the server is a different kind of human or hybrid. Everyone's different and that's normal, he thinks.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Sure we know that Skeppy is his whole heart both metaphorically and literally in a sense, but he would be devastated if anything were to happen to you. He would feel like a part of him is missing and it would frustrate and upset him to no end knowing that the missing piece could never be found again.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

In his 9'6 form he will carry you around in his arms like a doll just to tease you. He think you look adorable as you whine and tell him that you aren't a toy to haul around.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

He wouldn't like someone who takes advantage of him or does things he doesn't like consistently on purpose. Like, teasing him is fine, he does that too, but don't do what he doesn't like on purpose everytime you see him. He just thinks that's disrespectful even if you were just teasing.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

When he sleep he's absolutely wrapped around you. Laying by your side, arms and legs wrapped around your torso and waist respectively. You are his pillow now and you're being held hostage until he's decided he's satisfied.

A/N: Hey ⚰! Thank you for the request! I have to admit it was a little hard not to make it reference poly!c!skephalo because of how often its referenced that Bad and Skeppy are close to one another. (Someone please give me an excuse to remake this with poly!c!skephalo-) Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed reading this!

(Requests are open and anon is on!)

[shebeafancyflapjack]

Little Blue Eyes

A brief follow-up to this. Eleanor visits Michael during his reforming.

.

She had to hand it to Jason. If anyone had told her that it was possible to break a Janet out of Hell and get her away from an army of demons using just a Molotov, a single demon exploder gun, and a bag of weed, she’d have been very sceptical. But somehow he managed to bring their not-a-girl home, riding back in that hand-cart, grinning away as if he’d gone to a Jaguars game with her.

That was one problem dealt with. Now only a billion others to sort out.

As overjoyed as she’d been to see Janet back, safe and sound, she hadn’t been looking forward to reliving the most awful night of the year by explaining to her why their tall, dandy dressed demon wasn’t at her side, or hadn’t gone to save her.

It was easier to hand her the note that Michael had wrote (or possibly snapped into being after she slammed the door as she was sure even he couldn’t write that fast) before he’d pulled the trigger on himself.

I’m sorry.

I don’t want you to be worrying about how I might betray you or let you down again. If I’m locked up, you’re just going to worry that I’ve escaped. Just leave me in a tank on the other side of the map, or in Janet’s void if you bring her back, or just leave me in the Bad Place. If anything I just wanna ask that you make sure I’m all in there as I’d rather not come back shorter. Also if you can make sure no dogs are around to lap me up, I’d appreciate it.

I only ever wanted to save you all. I’m sorry I did nothing but screw up. I understand if you don’t want me back in the group after I’m back to normal. Please just get Janet back safe, even if it does mean going to the Judge. And give my best to Chidi when he wakes up.

I wasn’t lying about one thing; I really do love you all so much. I’m sorry it could never be enough.

Michael.

Reading the goo-stained letter with shaking hands, she’d struggled not to burst into tears of anger or throw up. Standing in the middle of the empty room, her friend dripping all around her, she’d wanted to scream at him for this being his best attempt to make things up to her - to forking leave her! To take the cowards way out. 

Being angry was so much easier than accepting the guilt of what she had said to him before that moment. Of questioning if she had gone too far...if she’d just taken a moment to listen to him...Usually the dude had trouble shutting the fork up but that night, all he’d done is stand there and take everything she threw at him...until there was nothing left standing. Literally.

If she’d had any idea he would do something so reckless and stupid then of course she would never have said...

But you did know. You knew exactly what he was prepared to do to help you, if it’s what you said you needed. What you wanted.

She never wanted this, she admits to herself, barely a couple months later.

Running this experiment basically single-handed was...not overly difficult. In fact, she was pretty confident in saying they were doing okay, considering the circumstances. 

But it still sucked. She was alone. Again.

Obviously there was no way she was going to have Michael’s goo abandoned in some random, isolated location. She was mad at the guy but she wasn’t a monster...so she told herself. At the same time, she couldn’t give up the role he’d thrusted upon her by suddenly taking up the role of nurse-maid, as hot as she might have looked in the uniform. He’d chosen to do this so she could work without distractions. Without a liability. 

“He sacrificed himself to save me. We’re on our own now. Let’s make it count.”

Just get the fork on with things, same as before. No point in looking back.

Tahani is the one who volunteers. She’s able to separate herself from the other humans without causing too much suspicion, claiming the need for a private getaway up in the hills, deep in the valley, a hidden fancy lodge by a stream, surrounded by peaceful deer and mountains. Definitely not Eleanor’s scene, anything involving the wilderness or even resembling camping.

By the time Eleanor sees her off on a private car Derek conjured up, Michael’s goo already reached its first form. The blind, helpless demon larva showed no signs of awareness of his surroundings, curling up as small as possible, malleable as Tahani swaddled him in her fluffiest blanket. Eleanor was almost impressed at how quickly the sexy giraffe had overcome being grossed out at the slimy, squidgy creature, able to look almost maternal as she carried him into the car. And she made sure to say as much.

Tahani’s heavy hearted response would stick with Eleanor for the next few weeks; “I didn’t reassure him when he asked us if we could ever be friends with a gross monster. Best I can do is show him how much we truly care.”

Ouch. Way to kick her in the girl-nads.

“You sure you’ll be okay?”

“I’ve helped out in multiple animal sanctuaries and used to fly out to work with deprived children with my dear friend Angelina...But this is definitely new territory for me.” She’d said as she looked over the larva demon, making the tiniest cooing noise in his sleep (or what they assumed was sleep). “I’ll try my best.”

That was all any of them could do. She’d contemplated attempting to speak to the larva Michael in her arms. What could she possibly say? Could he even understand her?

She was still angry. And yet it was difficult to connect the anger towards the one who abandoned her to the pathetic looking being in the blanket. Best to save all those harsh words on the tip of her tongue for when he was back to being tall and slappable. 

Is he really the one you want to slap?

The question comes back to haunt her more frequently each night that follows, whenever she thinks back on that night, or wonders how the two of them are doing. She and Tahani send letters often via the birds who are happy to act as messengers. They just have to be careful none of the humans intercept them. She lets her gorgeous friend know how the experiment is going and Tahani offers her tips on how to improve John, in particular. Every time she goes to write ‘how is Michael?’ she erases it, chest tightening. Tahani tells her anything important.

The slug monster form that follows the larva is a lot more challenging, she reports. He’s now the size of a Tibetan huskie and just as hungry.

I just let him roam the fields and eat what he can find. Sometimes I have to pull him in on a leash if he doesn’t tire himself out, otherwise I worry he’ll slither off in the night. I try to talk to him but he just grunts or roars at me until I tell him off. I was a little worried he might try to eat me but I found playing music - 80′s classics, mostly - calms him down and makes him rather docile. I don’t think he knows quite who I am or remembers anything. Perhaps it’s like when Janet is rebooted? He may need time to restore his memories, as she did.

Oh, darn, I must finish - he’s in the rose bush again!

Sometimes the image of her prim socialite friend trying to restrain a two-hundred-pound slug monster is so hilarious she can’t help but laugh. Other times she feels more guilt tugging at her soul to go lend a hand.

Is Michael really little more than an animal, in his head, right now? She’s hardly proved herself the best at pet care, though it sounded like Michael overeating was the least of their worries. It pained her to imagine what his head must be going through right now. Is he scared? Confused? Lost? Does he have any emotions other than the instinct to feed?

Does he still blame himself? Does he miss her as much as she...?

The more she sits in that chair in the office, the smaller she feels. It doesn’t belong to her; she’s merely filling it in while he’s gone. She has lunch in silence, remembering the jokes they used to share, the games of trying to aim food in the others mouth across the desk. She remembers him snapping a margarita for her when he knew she needed it most. She remembers his hand on her shoulder. She remembers him finding her at her lowest point, when everyone else had doubted her, turned their backs.

She remembers him, always there. And now she’s lost him.

Was wanting him gone over a stupid lie really worth all of this?

When Jason returns with Janet, on the same day she’s hesitating whether to jump on the nearest unicorn and head towards the mountains, she takes it as a sign. She has no excuse to stay away now - not with Janet back to watch over things, though she’ll probably be paying Michael a visit soon too.

She rides up on the train Janet conjures for her, saving her from trying to figure out how to ride a unicorn without breaking her neck. Something tells her she might have more luck at taming a slug monster than her British friend, not that she has any experience, just a few encounters with the grosser men in Arizona. Besides, it was Michael, at the end of the day. Their Michael.

The same Michael willing to sacrifice himself to help a bunch of cockroaches.

It’s such an idyllic landscape she arrives at. A total holiday card photo, without the snow. Nothing but grass and trees for miles before a backdrop of purple mountains. She looks around, seeing the evidence of devoured flower gardens and broken fences. At least the solid, oak cabin by the stream stood in tact, smoke billowing from the chimney. 

Eleanor is so focused on keeping her eyes peeled for a rampaging slug monster that she almost fails to spot the little person sat on the front step of the veranda.

She frowns. That has to be the whitest child she’s ever laid eyes on. Granted most kids growing up in Phoenix were smothered in fake tan before they were three by their moms, but this is something else. The kid has long white hair, half-plaited, down to the shoulders of the cream dress she’s wearing. Her skin is so pale it’s nearly translucent. Fork, is she looking at an actual ghost?

Wait...She’s a ghost. That really shouldn’t freak her out.

There’s just something so eerie about the little girl, from her sickly appearance to how weirdly quiet she is for...However old she is. Six? Seven? Thirteen? Eleanor really knows nothing about kids, just that they’re usually much louder than this one, sat alone, playing with a set of shining...

Oh.

“Michael?”

The kid looks away from the chain of a paperclips they were linking, gazing up at Eleanor on the gravel path. As soon as she sees their eyes, she has her answer. Even without a pair of glasses, she’d recognise those sparkling blue eyes anywhere. It’s only then that she remembers the third form.

Spooky little girl.

Though far less spooky than she imagined. More...sad.

Despite her surprise, she tries to smile, not knowing how badly she needed to see those eyes look at her again after this past month.

“Hey, buddy. How’re you feeling?” She starts to approach.

The kid drops the paperclips and jumps up to their feet, beginning to tremble terribly, eyes wide as saucers. 

Eleanor stops. Is he afraid? Of her?

“Michael? D’you remember me? It’s Eleanor, dude..”

“‘Hani!” The child cries turning and running inside the cabin. Fork, she knew was bad with kids, but shirt! Eleanor rushes in to follow, unable to hold back.

She enters the cosily furnished cabin to see the pale girl run up to the leg of the six foot beauty standing at the stove and cling to her skirt for dear life.

Tahani looks over from the pot of spaghetti, face fearful at first before lighting up when she spots her friend stood in the foyer.

“Eleanor! What a lovely surprise.” She beams, turning the stove off; “I’m so glad you decided to visit.”

“Wow...You’re kinda rocking the whole rustic single mom look here, babe.” Eleanor says, looking around the place, everything making her feel so warm and comforted from the open fireplace to the heavy air of recently baked bread. 

Tahani looks down to her charge hanging onto her dress, reaching down to pick the little fingers off carefully.

“Well, it was rather nice to have a project to myself, and Derek was surprisingly helpful. Everything else I acquired myself, having learned to survive in the wild from a well known ‘Bear’ friend of mine.” She holds the kid’s hands and bends down to their eye level; “Michael, sweetheart, look who’s come to visit. Remember Eleanor?”

The demon child whimpers, throwing their arms around Tahani’s neck and hiding in her luscious dark hair.

Eleanor bites her lip; “He’s a lot more shy than the slug monster, I take it.”

“Oh, I don’t understand. They were fine with Jason this morning, they were playing video games for hours - he and Janet teleported over briefly to check in on us. So glad they got back safe.”

So Jason gets a teleport but she takes the train? The first time she’s not an immortal being’s favorite to spoil.

Eleanor shuffles her feet, trying not to feel wounded at how terrified her friend currently is of her, when apparently there was no issue with Jason. But then, Jason makes it difficult for anyone to dislike him. Eleanor makes it an open invitation. 

The kid whispers something to Tahani that causes the woman to pick them up.

“Oh, darling, don’t be silly.” She responds, rubbing their back; “That was just a nightmare.”

“Nightmare?” Eleanor asks. Is she the stuff of nightmares?

Tahani eventually convinces the pale kid to go back outside to continue playing while she catches up with Eleanor.

Questions Tahani has about the experiment and the subjects get quickly brushed aside. Eleanor is unable to focus on anything but the image of Michael’s eyes looking at her with so much fear. When Tahani hands her a fresh cup of cofffee, she wants to stick her hand in it, just to scold herself for the sake of it.

“He’s having nightmares? I mean...she’s having...” Eleanor frowns.

“I find it easier to use ‘they/them’, which Michael seems to prefer as well, currently.” Tahani explains; “Most of the time, they’re a calm, affectionate child. Such a welcome change from the beast I was putting up with a fortnight ago, as much as they grew on me. It’s just at night, while their brain is still reforming and all these memories are flooding back...It can be rather distressing. Trust me, it’s heart-breaking just to see them crying and screaming...”

She can’t imagine that recalling centuries of brutally torturing innocents along with the knowledge of why that was wrong is easy for anyone, least of all in the form of a small girl, creepy or not.

“Honestly, the creepiest I’ve encountered so far is them levitating at the end of my bed - and that’s usually when they’re just looking for a cuddle.”

Eleanor smiles a little, Michael never was the best at being a truly ‘frightening’ demon.

“And I’m in these nightmares?”

Tahani sighs; “I suppose the memories of their last night are mixed up with everything else. They just...were worried you were here to say something mean or...you wanted them gone.”

Fork-sake. 

“I never wanted this, Tahani. I never wanted him to...Shirt, I didn’t even think he could, but...” She struggles to hold back tears; “I shouldn’t have come. I’ve just made him...Them more upset. Fork knows what I’d be in for if I stayed for the Teenage Boy phase. He’d probably set my hair on fire as payback.”

Bratty Michael in his fully grown form had been enough to handle. A hormonal one with amnesia was a whole other level.

“Eleanor. Just go talk to them.” Tahani presses; “This whole distancing thing you two are doing to deal with your falling out is dangerous. You’re not going to fix anything by staying away from them. As I kept telling my good friend Courtney when she had a row with my other friends, Lisa and Jennifer - you just need to communicate!”

“Babe, they’re afraid to even be alone with me.” She’s the monster under the bed now. All because she took one sin he committed to heart and forgot about all the good he’d done for her that outweighed it.

“Then stay, there’s plenty of room. Even if it means we swap and you stay here and I return to help with the experiment. Either way, this needs to be sorted out. I don’t believe demons are supposed to be this upset during their growth...You could help with that.”

Can she? She’s not the nurturing type, like her hot friend. She melted her own doll in the microwave as a kid. And she unwittingly talked her own demon bestie into exploding himself.

Tahani’s hand squeezing her wrist gives her some strength. 

“...Okay. I’ll try.” she meets her eyes; “Is Michael the only one allowed to snuggle in bed with you when they’re scared?”

Ten minutes later, she goes to find the creepy girl outside, this time sat among the flowers, being far more gentle with them than her previous slug form was. 

Eleanor approaches slowly.

“Michael? Buddy?”

The kid gasps, standing up again and flinching back. Eleanor raises her palm.

“Please don’t run away. I promise I won’t hurt you...and I won’t be mad.” She says, soft as she can manage, getting down to the ground; “And I’m not gonna make you go away anywhere. I just wanna chat...That ok?”

Michael doesn’t look too convinced, glancing over at the cabin. Looking for the one constant they’ve had, who’s been here for them, caring for them. Where Eleanor should have been, at least sometimes.

Okay. Time for the trump card.

“I got you something. Tahani said you have trouble sleeping. I thought maybe this guy could help?” She produces the minion toy from behind her back.

Michael’s eyes sparkle and he instantly reaches out to take it.

“So ugly!” They cheer, hugging it to their front.

Eleanor chuckles. Still so easily impressed.

“Can’t argue there...Also, I picked up those paperclips of yours. Did you know you can do this with them?” She holds up the chain; “Gimmie your wrist a minute.”

Michael frowns, hiding behind the toy a little.

“I won’t bite, dude. Kids are way too gross to eat. You’re too stringy and bony.” She wrinkles her nose.

They blink at her before slowly holding out their wrist. Eleanor takes the paperclips and links them around Michael’s arm, forming a bracelet.

The child gasps, clearly thinking they’ve seen it for the first time; “Holy motherforking shirtballs.”

“Damn, you kiss Tahani with that mouth?” That must have been another residue memory tucked away.

Michael sneers; “Kissing is gross.”

“It’s pretty weird if you think about it, yeah.” She concedes, glad they’re at least talking, as much conversation as she can have with a billion year old immortal that’s lost their mind as they regrow in the body of a haunting little girl; “...What about hugs? You like them, right?”

The kid nods, eagerly.

“...Maybe I could have one, someday? If we can be friends? I’d like that...” More than they could know right now. More than anything else, even having Chidi remember her. This...This is just as painful, because she can’t be sure if this is fixable. 

Eleanor crosses her legs as she sits, facing her friend.

“I’m so sorry, Michael. I know...you don’t understand that right now but...I’m sorry for why you’re scared of me...I wouldn’t ever wanna hurt you. Please believe me.”

Trust me? God, she’s such a hypocrite. 

The kid eyes her, up and down, before turning to the flowers. They bend down, picking a few up into a small bouquet of daisies. Michael turns and hands it out to her.

“Oh...Uhh....Thanks...” Eleanor reaches for them.

Michael’s blue eyes flash red. The flowers burst into flames.

“Forking shirt!” Eleanor jumps.

And still the kid holds them out; “Pretty, right?”

A heartfelt laugh tumbles out of her; “...I can tell Jason’s been here.” Or maybe that was part of her friend’s demon nature. Either way, it was adorable. “Thank you, Michael.” she says, taking the flaming daisies. “You know...if you want, I could show you how to make chains out of these? We could make a crown for Tahani?”

“And ones for me and you?” Michael asks, hopeful.

Eleanor’s lip quivers, a sudden lump in her throat. She reaches out to run her palm over her friend’s white hair, soft as it’s always been; “Yeah...Me and you too, bud.”

[starbeyy]

how haikyuu characters would die on the oregon trail

this is so incredibly stupid. i guess you can imagine this as them playing the game but I like to think that it’s actually the characters in the old west dying from ancient diseases. it’s funnier that way. cw: cursing, lots of death (but it’s kinda funny)

Karasuno

Hinata // died from cholera. shit himself to death. literally the least glamorous way to die when you’re traversing in search of a better life.

Kageyama // he got bit by a venomous snake but we all know he’s the kind of bitch to get bit by a zombie then not tell anyone, so he’s walking around holding his wrist and then one day he just kinda drops dead and everyones like 🤨 huh?

Tsukishima // literally a broken arm. you can die from a broken arm on the Oregon Trail. and everyone is like a little convinced that someone poisoned him to make him die quicker cause they were so tired of his bitching..

Yamaguchi // broke his leg from jumping into a lake bc he didn’t want to pay for the bathhouse; he limped too much and got run over by the cattle that was pulling his covered wagon :(

Nishinoya // died from exhaustion. he just went too hard for too long and then he tried to wrestle a gator and dropped dead literally immediately after. mad respect tho that gator had it coming ✊🏼😔

Tanaka // another tragic exhaustion loss, but it’s only because he tried to carry Kiyoko the entire way. she tried to make him just let her sit in the covered wagon, but he INSISTED on carrying her piggyback. he made a huge deal of his death but Kiyoko was just like “this could’ve been easily avoided”.

Ennoshita // poor thing was doing a great job, more than halfway there, then he got a fever. a fever put this poor mfer down. i don’t even know what to tell you he just fevered himself to death.

Asahi // he was an early loss. he didn’t want to drink any of the river water or eat any of the meat they bought from ~suspicious~ men on the trail so he eventually died from hunger and thirst. like, you gotta eat. but he simply refused.

Daichi // i genuinely think he makes it to Oregon but then, idk tries to build a barn and accidentally lets the wood frame fall on him. like everyone knows him because he braved the entire Orgeon Trail then got K.O.’d by some 2x4s. rip.

Sugawara //  he got measles. like who gets measles? you get it from contaminated droplets and Sugawara just can’t figure out where he might’ve encountered those. except for when he kissed that cow that he didn’t know was dead until he got really close. genuine accident, i swear.

Nekoma

Kuroo // cholera :( he was kinda peeved about it but Kenma caught him one night writing out a bunch of possible jokes to be carved on his tombstone. they ended up just putting the piece of paper on top of his burial spot and calling it a day

Kenma // actually makes it to Oregon. no one knows how, he didn’t even really try. he’s just really good at games, I guess.

Lev // another snakebite lookin’ ass. i think he genuinely just wanted to pet the snake and didn’t think anything of it when its butt rattled. he though it was an invitation like when cats purr. his body didn’t hold up much longer once the venom ran its course.

Yaku // honestly? madness. he didn’t die so much as he tore off all his clothes and abandoned his cattle and covered wagon to run off into the prairie and start his new life as a crazy mountain man. he just shouted “you’re all fools” one day and no one’s seen him since.

Fukurodani

Bokuto // ate some bad wild fruits. it wasn’t hit fault, he was really hungry and he got too attached to his cattle and couldn’t bring himself to kill and eat him :(( but he had a nice little trippy moment before he bit the dust.

Akaashi // y’know what, I’m gonna say it, he makes it to Oregon. and he THRIVES. he builds his house and tends to his cattle. because that’s what he DESERVES. 

Aoba Johsai

Oikawa // HAHA he died of typhoid. and if you think this guy didn’t make the BIGGEST deal out of his death. it was absolutely shakespearean. like he was on the brink for three whole days. and he kept giving these long speeches to each of his friends and pretending to die in the middle. then he actually died in the middle of iwaizumi’s and it was kinda awkward.

Iwaizumi // I think he makes it to Oregon, but he like loses his arm to a bout of gangrene or something crazy. like it just rotted and then fell off. and now everyone in Oregon makes fun of him for only having one arm and it’s honestly kinda pissing him off

Kyoutani // let a snake bite him, just to see if he could take it. he could not. he died very shortly after but not before he could try to suck the venom out of his own arm. it was kind of terrifying, honestly. 

Yahaba // another brave soldier lost to cholera. no one knows how he caught it and he just kinda bitches about it all the time. Kyoutani pushed him out of the wagon once and he sustained some pretty nasty head trauma from that so it really sped up the process.

Matsukawa // he and Hanamaki thought it would be funny to eat literally any mushroom they came across. obviously this worked against them at some point and they both started dying horrible deaths.

Hanamaki // basically when he and Mattsun were on their deathbeads, they gave an engraving on a piece of wood for both of them to be put at the gravesites bc obviously they’re gonna be buried together. it isn’t until they’re six feet under and the pieces of wood have been stuck into the ground that the group looks really closely and sees that the pieces go together to spell “PENIS”. classic.

Shiratorizawa

Ushijima // listen he just looks like the kinda guy to catch typhoid. but he doesn’t tell anyone that he doesn’t feel well, he just kinda coughs on the low and wipes the blood from the crook of his elbow. when he finally dies, everyone just kinda looks behind them and is like “where’s wakatoshi?🤔”. he’s dead, ya’ll, like four miles back.

Tendou // i’m sorry he’s got that sickly victorian child look you know he was one of the first to contract something deadly. i think he like caught multiple diseases. he was collecting them like pokemon: diptheria, dysentery, typhoid, you name it. the worst thing about him dying on the trail was the fact that his body couldn’t be donated to science. no one had any clue how he lived so long with so many ailments coursing through him.

Goshiki // he broke his arm. he BROKE his ARM and then DIED. yes, that can literally happen in the game do not ask me how. there was no foul play, no overexertion, he just 💀. sorry, buddy.

Inarizaki

Atsumu // he drowned. you wanna know how?

Osamu // drowned while wrestling Atsumu. it was a friendly quarrel turned nasty fight as they rolled into the gross river water. everyone kinda stood around and watched but they couldn’t tell when the flailing limbs were cries for help rather than thrown punches. swallowed too much water. guess it’s better than contracting double-cholera with your twin brother.

Kita // exhaustion. this boy doesn’t stop walking. everyone is begging him to set up camp or lay in the covered wagon for a little while but he refuses, he just wants to keep walking. yeah he eventually just drops dead and everyone’s actually pretty sad about it.

Suna // the kind of bitch to fake diptheria. he acts all achey and feverish and says he just HAS to stay in the covered wagon. he says he can’t fish or hunt or do anything and then when someone actually catches diptheria, he’s forced out of the wagon bc he doesn’t wanna catch it. he does anyways. good riddance.

Aran // yeah he was the one who gave Suna diptheria. he didn’t mean to get it, but it was a little bit satisfying to watch Suna cringe as Aran gave him a big hug and called them “diptheria buddies”. they had a nice little double grave though <3.

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober Day 22: Lose - Keen Of The Green Chap.2: Hack Up A Ghost Or Two

Kwan’s always been the kinda guy too clean up others messes, you could say he was the teams mother hen, but this was kinda ridiculous. But at least he wasn’t cleaning up after his teammates for once.

Casper High was much more used to Danny and his general.. weird, now. To the point that people would give him random ghosts -usually plants, Whisps, or Blob ghosts- they found. Or if they were getting chased by or spotted a ghost people actually ran to him. The real surprise and improvement was that the teen wouldn’t run away from ghosts now, which everyone was in agreement he had been doing to try to ‘hunt’ the ghost in private, and would actually just eat what people brought him like it wasn’t as absolutely weird and messed up as it was.

Though seeing the switch flip in him between random Highschool senior loser to predator, if someone did manage to lead a ghost to the teen, was freaky and even rather scary. Some folks watched purely out of morbid curiosity others in some odd attempt to be supportive of the local monster. His friends were the only ones who seemed genuinely unphased. Which did make some wonder just how long this had gone on for, if the boy was born like this, or the really unpleasant thought that his parents messed him up.

He didn’t like that stuff being questioned though so no one did. They just treated him like they had before excluding the, probably odd and messed up to anyone outside of Amity, support of his oddness.

No matter how used to this they were though, Kwan was honestly not prepared to walk into Fenton throwing up chunks of a ghost into the school toilets.

Kwan blinks and opens and closes his mouth a few times before finding something to say after opening the -unlocked, what was Fenton thinking?- bathroom stall door. “Ate too much or something? And Fenton, for future reference, for the love of everything, lock the door”. Fenton predictably flips him off over his shoulder while hacking some more.

Kwan sighs, muttering, “why am I always the one to walk in on this stuff”, and walks over to the teen. Kneeling down and rubbing Fenton’s back like he does for his bros when they drink way too much. At least he made it to the bathroom. That was something. Todd literally never did. It was to the point he was banned from drinking heavily at anyone’s house other than his own.

Fenton grumbles, “you-”, hack, “-just have really bad luck”.

Kwan nods, agreeing that might be accurate, “well I’m not sure if this should be more or less embarrassing for you or me”.

Fenton makes a few gagging noises, “too sick to-”, hack, “-be embarrassed”. Which again, Kwan will admit is fair. Vomiting into a toilet, especially a public one, was always embarrassing but no one really thought about that in the moment. Especially if he couldn’t even be bothered to lock the bloody door.

After a bit Fenton sits back on his heels, arms on his knees, and looks to Kwan, “ugh, probably gonna get sick a bit more before it’s outta my system”. Kwan gives him a probably rather pained cringy smile at that, though noting how the whites of the smaller teens' eyes were pale green; which he doesn’t think has been something anyone has seen before. Maybe Fenton was actually sick? “Getting what out of your system?”.

Fenton rubs the back of his hand over his mouth, scowling down at the green smeared there, before actually answering, “ah. Well”, readjusting and shaking his head while mumbling something about him probably deserving some answers for this shit. Which while Kwan doesn’t actually think is the case, he still would like to know. Finding out things about Fenton has become kinda a fun game. So he keeps his mouth shut and lets Fenton continue, “so I had -let’s call it ‘breakfast’- things didn’t smell right but I’ve barely had any sleep and do I really care? No. I’ve drunk rotten milk before. But now I’m pretty well positive someone went and ecto-poisoned the NeverWoods or something”.

Kwan blinks, well that was a dick move. Sure the NeverWoods produced a lot of ghost plants and the Whisps and shit but that was cool and the things were cute. He even had one of the little blob guys as a pet, Fenton had nonchalantly given him food for the little guy. Which was weird ‘cause he had been nervous the odd teen would try to eat his pet or something when he found out. Like how some people ate rabbits and horses. Shaking his head a little, “so... so this is more, uh, food poisoning than anything else?”. Fenton shrugs but holds up a finger and leans back over the toilet; promptly throwing up again. Fenton grumbling after hacking a bit, “I’ll be fine”.

Kwan believes that, when is Fenton ever not okay? “Eh, this is as good an excuse as any to skip health”. Fenton chuckles a little, “your fault for putting it off ‘till senior year”. Kwan just shrugs and gives an agreeing, “yeah”, but hey, at least it was easy.

Kwan speaks up again as Fenton’s just been leaning over the toilet hacking and make other sounds the jock was more used to hearing late at night than mid-morning, “I'm guessing that whatever was done to the woods ain’t good for all the ecto there?”.

Fenton hacks a bit more, “no man, obviously”, spits into the toilet bowl and turns to look at him, “if I can’t handle it in my system then they certainly can’t”. Kwan frowns, “well damn”, speaking back up at Fenton rolling his eyes and turning back to the toilet, “so... what we gonna do about it? I take it goth girlfriend isn’t going to take that lying down, especially with you hacking into a gross ass toilet over it”, making a point to chuckle, “though hunter girlfriend might approve of it”. Pretty well everyone called those three friends of his his girlfriends and boyfriend, largely because it was funny. Fenton predictably moves his arm back to shove him over. Him banging the stall door open as a result and just letting himself land on the ground -kid was strong alright?- just as Dash and Dale come in.

“There you are man! We’ve been looking- hey is that Fenton?”. Said teen just groans, it sounds more out of annoyance than sickness though, even if he does throw up again.

Dale chuckles, “well looks like someone’s losing their lunch, or breakfast really. Or did he just spend the whole night drinking”, and smirks.

Kwan gets up and closes the stall door to give the kid some privacy. “More like got second-hand poisoning. Someone went and poisoned the NeverWoods or something like that”. Both other jocks scowl immediately. Dash snapping, “oh that is so not cool”. Dale nodding in agreement, “we should pummel whoever”.

That gets a chuckle from inside the stall, “I’d place my bets on the G.I.W., my folks ain’t the type”, followed by more hacking and spitting sounds, “and Val knows better”. They all know that what he means by that is that she wouldn’t go poisoning a place she knows is something of a ‘hunting ground’ for her friend. That girl hated ghosts a lot but not enough to go getting a living person -humanity questionable or not- sick. And his parents really were the more ‘shoot their heads off’ type. Kwan hums, “see now this sounds like a good excuse to go ransack their compound”. Dash and Dale immediately grin meanly, “oh Hell yeah. we’ve been waiting for an excuse to do that”, which as true. The whole town hated those men. For a lot of reasons. Everything from blowing up buildings to murder attempts to trying to tax them for the ghost problem; plus, the town all agreed they were way too violent with ghosts. Even Valerie/Red did.

Fenton grumbles, “this town is insane”.

Dash rolls his eyes, “says the guy who eats ghosts”.

“The fact that none of y’all even-”, hack, “-treat me weird over that now is part of the insanity”.

All three boys make waving off motions at the door, “eh, we love and support our local monster”.

“Then why do you still shit-kick me?”.

Dash smirks, “got an image and norm to maintain. Highschool hierarchy to uphold, Fenton”. They all hear the teen grumble back, “you know normally, sheep don’t go around poking wolves”. They decidedly ignore the low-key sorta implied threat of him eating them; everyone knew by now that the kid wouldn’t actually do that. Alpha predator or not. Even if he probably could.

They can hear him flush and get up, opening the stall door seconds later. His face looked practically flushed a kinda sickly green, he glares at them anyway, “if you’re really gonna do that then you have my full support and involvement”. That makes the three jocks grin and cheer. And all it takes to get Fenton’s three friends in on it was dragging Fenton over to them and blurting out that the G.I.W. poisoned him. Which they oddly seemed less surprised and more just fed up about.

[johnkrrasinski]

the chain on your neck; 

full masterlist

Pairings: Steve Rogers x female!reader 

Word count: 2,291

Warning: too much fluff probably 

Summary: Steve Rogers came home to you after a delayed return and brought something special for you. 

a/n: i was listening to call it what you want by taylor swift (well, it would be pretty obvious for my swiftie followers lol) anyways, i was really inspired by the line “i want to wear his initial on a chain round my neck” and that to me, has always been one of my favorite lyrics of reputation. also, the title was inspired by that exact line from you are in love. so here’s a steve rogers fic predicated on that line! hope you like it. please leave a like and comment. ❤

It was 9.30am on a Sunday morning in New York. Normally, you would take your sweet time to stretch in your bed and turn slowly to the other way around to gaze lovingly at your boyfriend. It was a rare sight to see him in such a serene state, so you didn't have the heart to wake him. It was lovely to see him without the wrinkles on his forehead and furrowed brows because he was carrying so much on his shoulders. His duties as Captain America, the missions, the battles, the reports, the urgent late night calls, the miscreants had clearly took a toll on him.

And you being his girlfriend, it was crystal clear to you how often he would put on a facade to be the backbone of the Avengers. Because, everyone is relying on him. There were innocent folks that needed his protection. There were little kids looking up to him. He didn't have the luxury to pour a couple tears to lay off some steam or have a mental breakdown in public. He had to be strong and steady.

Often times, when the fight really did a damage on him and it was written all over his face, he would try to hide it away from you. You knew he needed you, you knew he needed your comforting touch to ground him. He wouldn't ask for it though, he would simply undress himself out of the grimy suit and wordlessly wrapped himself around you. The feel of your skin against his kept him sane throughout all the worst missions he'd ever gone through.

So when you had the chance to just take a minute and enjoy this brief moment of life simply letting your boyfriend be... Human, you cherish and savor every single second of it.

That's your usual Sunday morning routine. But not today, today you woke up in a cold bed alone because the love of your life had gone to another mission in Prague four days ago, and he was supposed to come back last night. You were feeling grouchy because you didn't get your morning cuddles and kisses and Steve's morning cuddles and kisses were like coffee to other people. They need their morning boost to start off their day.

Delayed returns were part of the job. There was always unexpected incidents that required immediate attention of whoever took the mission. And the behest is that, you do not come home before the mission was truly taken care of.

So instead of sulking all day in bed, you leisurely check your phone and send him a good morning text. You figured that it would ease the feeling of missing him. You knew better than to wait around for an instant reply. You were not allowed to check your phone under any circumstances during missions unless you are safe and sound in your hotel room. So you decided to get yourself out of bed and washed your face and brushed your teeth.  

After your daily morning routine, you went to the kitchen to cook yourself some early meal. Nat, Tony, Wanda, Vision, Rhodey and Clint were already there in the middle of their breakfast. They greeted you in your not-so-cheerful state.

"Good morning, kid." Tony was the first one to speak up.

"Hey Tony." In an indifferent tone. You just weren't in the mood to socialize because you missed your boyfriend terribly, and you just really wanted to spend your Sunday morning with him.

"Someone's in a grumpy mood." Natasha spoke up. The woman was always too good in seeing right through people.

"Not really, I'm just hungry." You retorted. Again, with that disinterested attitude.

"Hungry for some food or a certain super soldier, cause I've seen you hungry for actual food y/n, it wasn't like this."

"Okay! You're right. I'm missing my boyfriend and I'm so goddamn worried. He hasn't contacted us since last night, when he was supposed to come home. I texted him this morning and he still hasn't answered. What if something had happened to him and he wasn't able to send a message? What if he got stuck somewhere where he can't find a signal? What if he-"

"Sweetie, I think you are getting yourself too worked up. Just take a deep breath and eat some breakfast, yeah? I'll make you some coffee to ease your nerves." Wanda politely interrupted you. Out of all people, she knew exactly what the feeling was like. Aside from being able to read people's minds, she had actually lost so many of her loved ones, so she understood your overwhelming fears.

You put your head in your hands and took a deep breath and exhaled. You were getting too worked up and you needed to clear your head because freaking out is clearly not going to solve anything or give you any answers. It's not going to turn whatever situation Steve was stuck in and provide you a call or a text from him out of nowhere.

And you didn't realize how hungry you had been until your stomach started to make some growling noises that told you you needed some nourishment.

"Yeah, okay, I'm gonna cook something up."

Just as you pushed your chair back and stood on your feet, Friday's voice alerted everyone from the tranquil state of the room. "Captain Rogers, sergeant Barnes and Mr. Wilson are about to land in 5 minutes."

As everyone in the room had realized what was happening, they all immediately got on their feet and ran to the where the helipad was placed. You, on the other hand was overwhelmed with a sense of relief and joy. Because your boyfriend has come home and in one piece. You were about to see his beautiful sapphire eyes again and you couldn't wait any longer. You wanted to be the first one to welcome him home as soon as he lands.

As the quinjet landed on the ground and the door opened up wide, revealing your boyfriend and your friends, Bucky and Sam on his sides, walking out limping but still with that warm, familiar smile on his face because he finally saw you. Four days had felt way too long for being overseas from you.

He instantly ran as fast as he possibly could to you and grabbed you by your waist and carried you off the ground in a tight embrace. He buried his face in your neck and inhaled your luscious scent. You couldn't see his face because you were also burying your own face in his neck, but you could feel him smiling so widely because he was home and you were in his arms now.

"God, I've missed you so much, baby."

You moved your face to the front of his and pressed your foreheads together.

"I've missed you too, baby. So fucking much." You sniffled. In that moment it was just you and him, because you had been without each other for way too long to have a care about anything else in the world. Four days felt like four thousand years. It might seem dramatic but that's what happens when you are madly in love.

"I know baby, I know. I'm here now, it's okay." He kissed you, it was brief but it held more meaning than words. You closed your eyes as you relished in the feeling of him. Pressed up against you and tangible. Not a looming presence in your room, not a ghost in your dreams, not a whispered name in your prayers.

He put you down as threw his arm around your neck to keep you close. You both walk in each other's embrace to your room. Luckily, he didn't bring home any severe wounds that would require an immediate & extensive care. He could go straight to his own bed, take a warm shower and change into his pyjamas so he could lie in his cozy bedstead with you. Really, that's all he really wanted right now.

Steve Rogers was a man of sentiment. Not a lot of people saw it but, it's factual. You were lucky enough to witness the way this man displayed his affections and the way he'd never let you doubt his love and loyalty a single second. He was an assertive and a solemn leader to the team, especially when he had to save the world and faced the government. But you knew his tender heart way too well to let it affect you behind closed doors. You love him for the man he chose to be even when he didn't.

After you both wash yourself off the dirt, you put on one of his hoodies that literally swallowed your smaller figure. You looked so tiny and adorable in his shirts, he never minded that he'd often have trouble finding a certain shirt. It was always his hoodies, sweaters and old shirts that he rarely wore anymore. If she claimed it, then it's hers. No room for argument. Not that he'd try anyway.

She was drying her hair with the hairdryer in the small mirror of her bathroom when he walked in with nothing but his sweatpants on, he stared into her beautiful eyes in the mirror with a smile. "I got something for you."

"Yeah? What is it?" She smiled back at his reflection in the mirror.

He pulled out a lovely navy blue box with a silver ribbon on top of it. It made her turn around with an inquisitive look. She moved her eyes directly to the box in his calloused hands. He opened the lid cautiously, fearing that she might not like the surprise. Because even Captain America is still scared of rejections, he was trained for orders and enemies, but no one taught him that the little, sickly guy from Brooklyn would be rejected by  a lot of women who couldn't see him past his appearance. And certainly, no one  prepared him for the rejection from the love of his life. His past fears are clouding his mind and taking over his emotions before she even said a word.

The navy blue box revealed a beautiful piece of jewelry, specifically, a golden vintage necklace that hang up the letter "S" in the middle of its rounder. The red rose adornment on the left side of it only added the exquisite intricacies to it. And the antiquated piece of leaf on the other side enhanced more of its charm.  She couldn't help the desire to touch the charming piece with her own fingers. She delicately curled them around the rustic chain, deliberately picked them up closer to her sight; she was charmed by it.

"Do you like it?" Steve spoke up timidly, as if he was doubting his own choice, he really wanted her to like it. He nervously stared into her eyes, waiting for her answer.

"I love it, Steve." She returned that restlessness expression on his handsome face with a fond smile. She loved it. She truly loved it and she meant it. She wasn't even faking it to spare his feelings, she genuinely became attached to it even if she hadn't even hung it around her own neck yet.

"Where did you get it from?" She continued. Her curiosity knocked on the moment.

"There was this local gift shop in Prague, it looked really old and small but still had its own charm, you know? I was walking around one night..." He looked distant for a second. "Couldn't sleep, the mission really carried a weight that day. I just kept walking, taking in the fresh midnight air until I found the shop... It drew me in."

Steve's face changed from an agitated expression to pure delight. He couldn't wait any longer to see it encircle the shape of her neck, so he asked; "do you want me to put it on you?"

"Please." She turned around to face the mirror again and waited for Steve to unclasp the hook of the necklace. She could feel his warm, steady breath on the back of her neck and this is the kind of intimacy not a lot of people talk about, but oh, how much it mattered in the moment.

When the necklace was on, she took her time to soak it in, how divine it looks on her now, she didn't think she could go anywhere without this necklace being a part of her. She pressed her thumb on every inch of this necklace, it really is a part of her now.

He is now wrapping his bulky arms around her shoulders and put his head right on the right side of hers. He looked at her reflection in the mirror. "You know why I chose this necklace?" He left a swift kiss on the right side of her neck where he was just resting his head on.  

"Why?"

"Because it's the closest thing to your heart, and that's where I'm always supposed to be."

She didn't realize tears had started brimming in her eyes, the tenderness and sincerity in his voice made her realize just how lucky she was to possess such love him, and to have that love returned in if not, a greater measure than she ever hoped for.

"I love you, you know that?" It was rhetorical, she knew damn well  that he had it ingrained deep in the back of his head that she loved him. Desperately, utterly and irrevocably.  And so did he to her. It was more than a mere declaration but rather a vow, that it would be bounded to their souls for eternity. In sickness and in health, for better or for worse, 'till death do us part.

"I love you too, angel."

[kelelamentia]

Dogs are a Ladybug’s best friend

Dogs are a Ladybug’s best friend

@ozmav

This came from @thebookwormfairy idea “What if Marinette had a Retired Police Dog as a Pet”

@realrandomposts and I discussed which Miraculous would be used and, while my initial thought was turtle, @realrandomposts was the one who came with the idea for the fox, and just fit better for this fic (And I want to tick Alya off), because Trixx would NEVER miss a chance to cause chaos via having a dog as a holder.

As for Trixx’s gender, the site basically told me it varied from translation to translation, so I flipped a coin; literally.

 At a Gotham hotel:

Marinette couldn’t believe Captain snuck himself on to the plane!  Actually, she could, he’s such a smart boy.  But, how did he get past all that security?  Never mind Trixx probably helped with that, he likes to cause chaos like that.

“Trixx, did you have a hand in getting Captain on the plane?” Marinette asked.

“Noooooooooo.” Trixx dragged out, trying and failing to look innocent.

Marinette sighed, running her hands through Captains fur.

“Besides he was going to miss you terribly so.” Trixx continued.

“And you would have missed him as well Marinette.” Tikki added.

“True…” Marinette agreed.

“And I know Captain never wants to leave his partner alone unless he has to.” Trixx said.

Marinette smiled, still petting Captain and him loving it, the Fox Miraculous; hidden by dog tags and a bandana, catching her eye.  Marinette remembered how this came to be.

*Flash back*

Marinette was having an awful week; Lila spread rumors around the school about her, her classmates have shown to be more like sheep than classmates, Adrien wanted her to continue being a doormat, and Chat could NOT take the hint at the last Akuma attack and left her alone to fight so he could throw a tantrum.

Thankfully, Captain has proven to be the best and most loyal friend she could ever hope for. Marinette knows he would never leave her in danger just because he didn’t like what she said, he never believe she was petty and jealous of a person with such FAKE tales, and he would never ask her not to stand just for justice; being a former police dog.

That’s when an idea hit Marinette.

“Tikki, I have an idea.”

Tikki tilted her head in confusion, watching Marinette look over at her dog.

“Come on Captain, I’m going to introduce you to Master Fu.” Marinette said.

The worst the Master could do was say no, right.

 With Master Fu:

“Greetings Marinette, Tikki” Fu welcomed.

“Hello Master Fu.” Tikki greeted.

“Hello Master, I hope you don’t mind but I brought my dog; Captain.” Marinette returned.

“I don’t mind Marinette; animals can be the best of companions and partners.” Fu smiled, holding out his hand for Captain to sniff.

Captain gave a cautious sniff, but accepted Fu; allowing him to give a single head pat.

“Why don’t we sit down, I feel we have much to discuss.” Fu offered.

“Thank you Master.”

Once they were seated at Fu’s low table, Fu began talking.

“What would you like to discuss Marinette?”

“Can a Miraculous be given to an animal?” Marinette asked.

Fu raised an eyebrow.

“May I ask what brought this on?”

Marinette steeled herself.

“First Chat Noir; he’s late or doesn’t show to battles, when he does he’s pretty much out of the fight immediately, he flirts at the worst times even though I’ve told him I’m not interested in him, he throws hissy hits on a regular basis, and he doesn’t see being a hero as a responsibility but as a game.”

“What of the other heroes?”

“The other heroes have proven that they see being a hero as game as well, they don’t look to see the truth went given no evidence, they like pretty words and offers of connections than working for it themselves and are unwilling to listen to reason when it’s something they don’t want to hear.”

Marinette looked Fu in the eye.

“I’m tired of fighting alone Master Fu.”

The last sentence bore a lot of weight behind it; and Fu heard it.

“I understand Marinette.”

Fu got up to retrieve the box, once he sat down again he started talking.

“You wish for Captain to stand beside you.”

“Yes Master.”

“Do you think he will be able to handle it?”

“Yes Master, he’s a former police dog, he probably has more training and experience than I do.” Marinette giggled.

Captain gave a small tail wag; he loved hearing his girl laugh.

Fu smile and nodded.

“Now it is possible for an animal to use a Miraculous, but the process is different.”

“How so Master?”

“Normally the Guardian would choose the hold, but in the case of animals; the Kwamii’s get to choose if they want to work with them or not, so I cannot guaranty anything Marinette.”

“I understand Master.” Marinette nodded.

“Good, first we must…”

Fu was cut off by a box shaking and jumping around until Trixx popped out.  Once he was out he grabbed Marinette’s hand and began to beg.

“Please, please, PLEASE let me team up with you and your dog! This looks like it’s going to cause chaos and so much confusion!  Please let me, I know how to speak canine, so I know when to transform and stuff, I get along really well with Tikki, my Miraculous can hang with his tags, and my charge up food is really easy.  Please, please, PLEASEEEEEEE!”

Marinette couldn’t help but laugh.

“I have no problem working with you Trixx, but let’s see what Captain thinks.”

Marinette turned to her dog, he liked Tikki, but that doesn’t mean he’d like Trixx.

Trixx flew over to Captain; Captain gave him a sniff.

“Hi Captain, do you want to team up with me to protect your girl?” Trixx asked.

Captain was quiet for a moment, but eventually gave a gentle woof in agreement.

“Yes!” Trixx cheered.

Marinette, Fu and Tikki laughed as Marinette clipped the Miraculous on Captain’s collar; behind the tags, but that laughter was cut short by screaming and crashing outside.

“AKUMA!!!!”

Fu turned to Marinette.

“Go.”

Marinette nodded her head.

“Alright Tikki; Spots on!”

Captain gave a stern bark.

Once the transformation light died down Marinette could see what Captain looked like.

Captain wore an orange, black and white vest that was modeled after a normal police dogs vest; it had the fox tail symbol, in white, on the back and a ladybug symbol on the front where a police badge would be.  Captain also had arm guards on his front legs that covered the top of his paws; they faded from orange to white, but Marinette’s favorite part was his mask.  It was just a normal orange, black and white mask, but just looked so cute.

“Well, I can’t call you Captain, no matter how common that name might be.” Marinette said, looking at her dog. “How about…Hunter?”

The newly christened Hunter gave a soft woof in agreement.

“Come on Hunter, we have an Akuma to fight.”

And then they were off.

“Good luck.” Fu said as they left.

 Where the Akuma was:

The fight with the Akuma, which Chat did not show up to, went smoothly. Hunter cast his illusion by howling and apparently, he could also sniff out the akumatized item, this made things so much easier.  Ladybug didn’t even need to cast Lucky charm! They even did a ‘Pound it’ where Hunter bumped his nose against her fist.

But once everything was fixed by the cure, Chat showed up.

“Hey Bug-a-boo.”

“You missed everything Chat.” Her voice was hard, causing Hunter to tense up.

“Aww, don’t be like that Love bug, it couldn’t have been bad.”

Chat reached out to grab Ladybug only to be blocked by a snarling Hunter.

“What the heck is that?!” Chat exclaimed, back away from the costumed dog.

Ladybug smiled sickly sweet smile at Chat.

“This is Hunter the new, and permanent, fox holder and my new partner.”

“But what about Rena Rouge?! And I’M your partner” Chat demanded.

“She has been retired, and don’t worry about the Guardian; he’s already agreed to this.  As for being my partner; tell me Chat when was the last time you showed up on time for a fight, didn’t get turned against me, or thrown a hissy fit and leave just because you didn’t get what you want?” Ladybug asked.

Chat couldn’t answer her, his mouth flapping uselessly.

“That’s what I thought.” Ladybug then turned to Hunter. “Come Hunter we should leave before your time runs out.”

Hunter gave a woof in return and jumped away with his girl, not before giving one last hard look at Chat.

*End flashback*

Trixx had been appalled by Chat’s attitude and was steaming while he ate his marshmallows, Tikki doing the same while eating cookies.  

Marinette smile as she remembered Alya’s outrage at being replaced, and by a dog at that.  But Hunter proved to the people of Paris how good he was and how great of a partner he was for Ladybug; Their ‘Pound it’ was all the rage in the internet and is now the most popular trick to teach your pet.

So here she was in Gotham with her super hero dog, which snuck aboard a plane, and two powerful little gods.

What was her life?

“Well, sulking around this hotel won’t do us any good; how about we go for a walk guys?” Marinette suggested.

Captain, Tikki and Trixx agreed; Tikki flying into Marinette’s bag and Trixx flew under Captain Bandana.

 At a nearby Park:

Marinette felt so much freer at the park, the only thing people would see was a girl and her dog.

She was just throwing the ball she got for Captain when another dog, a Great Dane, came up and began sniffing Captain.  Captain held still, ball in mouth, and let the other sniff; eventually Captain seemed to like the other dog and began leading them over to Marinette.

“Did you make a friend Captain?” Marinette asked, petting her dog.

Captain gave a slight wag of his tail and Great Dane’s tail was going so fast in was a blur. Marinette reached out her hand for the Dane, so they could get her scent; she was rewarded with a lick on her hand.

“Well aren’t you a sweet heart!  Let’s find out your name.” Marinette laughed, before reaching for the Dane’s tags. “Titus? Well it’s nice to meet you Titus!”

Titus barked his hello, trying to get closer to Marinette’s hands for petting.

“Alright buddy, you want to play fetch with me and Captain while you wait for your owner?”

Titus barked again, this time jumping around in excitement.

“Okay, okay,” Marinette laughed before winding up the ball. “FETCH!”

Marinette let the ball go and both dogs shot after it; tussling a bit to be the one to bring it back. This went on for a while before Marinette heard a voice shouting.

“TITUS!”

Titus responded to the call and ran over to a boy about her age, a very handsome boy.  Titus circled around the boy a couple times before running back to Marinette.  Marinette could only guess that this was Titus’ owner.  He made his way over to her.

“Hello Miss, I’m sorry if Titus caused you any trouble.” He greeted.

“Titus was no trouble at all; he was a real sweet heart.” Marinette assured. “My name is Marinette, and this is my dog Captain.”

“It’s lovely to meet you Marinette; my name is Damian, you’ve already met Titus.” Damian greeted, gently taking her hand and placing a kiss on the back; Marinette couldn’t help but blush.

Watching his girl blush at the new person caused Captain to step between the two, making both of blink.

“I’m sorry Damian; Captain doesn’t like strangers getting too close to me.”

“It’s fine Marinette; I should have introduced myself to your dog before invading your space. It’s understandable that he takes me as threat.” Damian said, slowly reaching out his hand for Captain.

Captain investigated the offered hand and gave Damian a hard stare.  There was a tense moment before Captain gave a snort and walked to Marinette’s side.

“I think you’ve been approved of Damian.” Marinette said surprised. “He usually doesn’t like a lot of people; really it’s just me and my parents.”

“A high honor then, I will do my best not to waste it.” Damian stated. “I would hate to ruin my chance at talking to a beautiful lady such as you.”

The blush returned to Marinette’s face.

“T-Thank you, but I’m not much.”

Damian just smirked at her, making her blush more.  Damian was going to say something when he noticed Titus sniffing at Captain’s Bandana. Marinette knew he was smelling Trixx.

“That is a very well made, where did you get this Marinette?” Damian asked.

“I made it myself; I couldn’t find anything in the stores that I liked.”

“Really?  Might I commission you to make one for Titus?”

“You can, but I don’t have a lot of my sewing supplies with me in Gotham, so it could take some time.”

“Where are visiting from Marinette?”

“I’m visiting with my class from Paris; we’re here mainly to see Wayne Enterprise.”  Marinette clarified.

“And they let you bring your dog?” Damian asked.

“They didn’t ‘Let me’.” Marinette looked over at Captain with a mock serious look. “Somehow, someone managed to trick the entire airport and sneak himself onto the plane.”

Damian gave a snort in amusement.

“Really?!”

“I know it sounds fake, but…”

Damian cut Marinette off.

“No, I believe you; I’ve seen animals be smarter than people before, but this very impressive.  Your classmates must have thought it funny.”

Marinette wilted a bit when Damian mentioned her classmates; he noticed.

“What’s wrong Marinette?”

“You won’t believe me…”

“I’ve been told I very good at telling who’s lying, so please tell me.”

“There’s a girl in my class who doesn’t like me, and she made it sound like I snuck Captain aboard the plane on purpose just to get attention.  I wouldn’t even know where to start on that!”

“It sounds like she’s done more than that Marinette.”

“She has…” Marinette sighed, she then gave a brief explanation to Damian about what was going on; he was not pleased.

“Your classmates are morons; large ones.”

“Yeah, they are.  Hey Damian, do you know much about Wayne Enterprise?” Marinette asked.

“I know enough.”

“Do you think they let Captain in?  I’d hate to leave him at the hotel tell all day.”

“I’m positive they will Marinette, the Wayne family is a very open-minded family.”

“Thank you, Damian,” Marinette smiled, before asking another question. “Do you know any nearby dog friendly restaurants are?”

“Of course, I’d be happy to show you.  Perhaps you would let me join you as well.”

“I’d like that Damian; it would be nice to talk to someone with common sense that isn’t Captain.”

Damian chuckled and held out his arm; which Marinette took, and began to guide her to the closest café their dogs trotting along with them.

While at the café Damian got Marinette to open up a bit more about her classmates; Marinette didn’t know why she did that, she was just comfortable with him.  And if Damian thought her classmates to be morons before, he though them to be outright imbeciles now.

“These people clearly have no brain cells Marinette.”

Marinette smiled at Damian, it was nice to have someone who can listen to reason.

Eventually Marinette and Captain did have to go back to the hotel, not before they exchanged number though.

“Can we do this again tomorrow; my class won’t be spending all day at Wayne Enterprise.” Marinette asked just before she left; surprising herself at her boldness.

Damian didn’t seem to have an issue with her request though.

“You took the request right out of my mouth Angel.”

“A-Angel?” Marinette stuttered.

“Certainly, you’ve shown your class kindness and patience when they don’t deserve it or you, so yes Angel; unless it makes you uncomfortable Marinette.”

“It’s fine Damian, just please; never call me Princess.” Marinette pleaded.

Damian clearly wanted to ask why but left it alone.

“Of course, Marinette; I will respect your wishes.” Damian nodded his head. “Now will you allow myself and Titus to walk yourself and Captain back to your hotel?”

“Sure Damian.”

The walk was made up of Marinette asking what Damian wanted the Bandana for Titus to look like.  Once they reached the hotel they said their goodbyes.

“It was wonderful meeting Damian, you too Titus.”  Marinette said.

“You as well Marinette, Captain.” Damian waved goodbye.

 The next morning:

Marinette, Captain and the class set off for Wayne Enterprise, Lila being Lie-le the entire time on the bus.

“The Wayne family just loves me; they always try and make sure I’m alright.” Lila boasted.

“Wow Lila, do you think you could introduce me?  I’d love to have an interview!” Alya questioned.

“Maybe Alya, they are a very busy family after all; we probably won’t even see them.” Lila redirected.

“Aww, that’s too bad.” Alya was disappointed.

Marinette, keeping a hand on Captain, resisted the urge to roll her eyes.  Last night before going to sleep, Marinette looked up the Wayne family; ignoring all the pictures she didn’t care about those and found many things. Like, if Alya wanted an interview she could just request one, yeah there would be some restrictions but Alya doesn’t care for doing her own research.

Adrien just kept quiet, just as always.

The class reached Wayne Enterprise; Marinette and Captain at the back of the group and were greeted by a surprise in the lobby.

“Hi everyone, I’m Dick Grayson and I’ll be the one giving you the tour around the building.”

The entire air shifted; Alya was ecstatic, Lila could get her an interview right away!  Lila was terrified, because this could go very south on her and she had no back up plans on being called out by one of the people she bragged about.  Marinette was confused, why were people getting excited?

Marinette was never good with icons outside fashion and music, so she didn’t know the Damian she spent time with the day before was the Damian Wayne.   So, when Damian got home he spoke with his family, telling them of a girl in the French tour would likely be using their names for gain.  Nobody liked the idea of being used, so if the topic came up they would shut it down; Damian figured out from Marinette’s descriptions that the topic would come up from one person or another.

Damian theory proved true when Alya; the pushy, rude, ‘always right’, Alya raised her hand.

“Go ahead.” Dick called on her.

“Hi, I’m Alya; I’m friends with your friend Lila Rossi!”

Lila froze at Alya’s exclamation; going very pale.

Dick frowned, now knowing who the liar in the group was; but was inwardly smirking at the chance to call them out.

“I’m sorry, but I’ve NEVER met a ‘Lila Rossi’ in my life; whoever that is lied to you.”

Alya looked like her world shattered with that one phrase.

Marinette realized Dick must be an important person Lila lied about; which one Marinette wasn’t sure they all sound the same after a point. Marinette looked over at Alya and saw the devastation on her face; Marinette really hoped her former friend would learn from this and start fact checking.

Marinette started running one her hands through Captain’s fur, the motion keeping her calm; watching more horror appear on her classmate’s faces as Dick continued.

"I hope she didn’t use our name to take advantage of people and she continues like this she will be hit with a lawsuit.”

Lila blanched, a lawsuit would really be bad, but she didn’t know how to backtrack from this lie; she didn’t think a Wayne would be the one conducting the tour.

“Well, now that that’s cleared up we can begin the tour.” Dick said, clapping his hands together.

But in a desperate attempt to get the negative focus off her Lila tried to get Marinette in trouble.

“Look Marinette brought her dog!  He can’t be here!”

Everyone turned to look at Marinette; Ms. Bustier was quick to say something.

“Marinette why in the world did you bring your dog?!”

“I didn’t want to leave Captain alone in hotel ALL day, what kind of pet owner would I be if I did that Ms. Bustier?  And how did you not see me bring him onto the bus?!”

Ms. Bustier opened her mouth to try and reprimand Marinette more but was cut off by Dick.

“This is perfectly fine Ms. Bustier; we were warned ahead of time that due to some strange events, there would be a dog in the group today.”

Ms. Bustier could only nod, not being able to argue with Dick, But Lila was outraged by this turn of events.

“Who could have possibly warned you about her dog?!”

Marinette; as much as she didn’t like Lila had to admit, that was a good question.

“I did.” Came a voice off from the side.

“Hey, Damian.” Dick greeted.

“Hello Grayson,” Damian nodded, before approaching Marinette; Titus at his side. “Hello again Marinette, Captain.”

“Damian! Titus!  I hadn’t thought you might work here!” Marinette said, “Which is silly looking back now, because you knew if Captain would allowed or not.”

“It’s fine Marinette.” Damian smiled at the sweet girl.

“Oh, hold on!  I was going to give this to you later, but since you’re here now.” Marinette said as she rummaged through her bag, pulling out a yellow piece of cloth.  “I managed to find some cloth and made Titus a Bandana, it’s nothing fancy but I wanted to see if he even liked it first.”

The Bandana was yellow with black thread spelling out ‘Titus’ in cursive.

“Its wonderful Marinette.”

“Thank you, Damian, can I put it on Titus now to see if he likes it?”

“Certainly.”

Marinette bent down to carefully tie it to Titus; who was holding still for her.

“There.” Marinette stood up.

Titus was then bouncing around her and Captain, braking and wagging his tail in happiness.  Making Damian and Marinette laugh, as Titus did his best to get Captain to play with him.

While they were in their own little world the people around them watched in awe; Damian Wayne could smile, he could laugh!

Dick was grinning ear to ear, being very thankful the lobby had cameras or else there would be no proof of this happening.  

Alya could decide between being hurt or confused; hurt by Lila’s lies or confused by the fact Marinette knew THE Damian Wayne.

Adrien was concerned; this was just going to cause more problems, why couldn’t Marinette just stay low?

Lila was seething, how is it that when she finally won over the class of idiots and turns them against Marinette, Marinette goes and somehow charms one of the riches and coldest people in the world!  This could not continue.  Lila slipped away; unknowingly catching Dick’s eye.

The rest of the class was just in awe of the sweet atmosphere around the two.

That atmosphere was broken when the sound of screaming and breaking began, a giant form comes busting into the lobby.

“Hello everyone, I am Arachnae and with no Ladybug or Chat Noir around, you all will be nothing but flies in my beautiful web.”

Arachnae was a human torso on a spider’s body, her entire form was covered in bright orange fuzz; head to the tip of each spidery leg.  The form was also very clearly Lila; she had her face and hair and the necklace she always wore, but the one thing different about Lila’s is that she now had 8 eyes.

Dick was the first to react.

“What the %&$@!”

Arachnae let out a hiss and shot webs from her hands; the strands aimed mostly at the class and Marinette.  The people that got hit were turned into little soulless puppets for Arachnae to play with and amuse herself.

Marinette jumped to dodge the web, hitting the ground running; looking for a place to hide, Captain at her side.

“Marinette!”

When Marinette dodged she threw herself away from Damian, causing him to worry, but his yell brought Arachnae’s attention to them.

“Ah yes Marinette, when I catch you I’m going to make you miserable!  And your little dog too!”

Arachnae charged at Marinette.

“Damian run!  She’s focused on me, go get help!” Marinette yelled, before she and Captain took off.

The chase began, with Arachnae destroying anything that got in her path.  As she ran Marinette began looking for a place to transform, counting on Captain to guild her around Arachnae’s attacks.  Eventually Arachnae ends up bringing the ceiling down and blocked herself from Marinette and Captain.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Arachnae screamed in rage. “FINE, I’LL JUST PLAY WITH MY NEW TOYS UNTIL YOU COME BACK! I KNOW YOU WILL YOU USELESS GIRL!”

Marinette looked around for a place without cameras and spotted a closet.

“This will have to do Captain.” Marinette said to Captain, as she closed them both inside. “Tikki? Trixx?”

“Ready!” They chimed together, flying from their hiding spots.

“Alright, now; Tikki Spots On!”

*Bark!*

With a flash of light Ladybug and Hunter were ready.  Looking around she saw some vents she and Hunter could crawl though, so the cameras didn’t see her.

 In the Lobby:

Arachnae had gotten most of the people in the lobby, except for three; Dick Grayson, Damian Wayne, and Adrien, her biggest targets outside Marinette.

“Just surrender to me, it would make this all so much easier!” Arachnae hissed at the boys, sending more webs and puppet people at them.

Dick and Damian had managed to dodge webs, puppets and Arachnae; Adrien was hiding behind a plant behind Arachnae, but they were also trapped in the lobby and running out of options.  Titus was running around, unable to get to Damian and Dick.

*Bark, Bark, Bark*

“Shut up, you dumb mutt!” Arachnae hissed, raising one spider leg bring it down on Titus.

“Titus!” Damian yelled.

Just as the Arachnae’s leg was about to hit a string from a ceiling vent wrapped around it and pulled. Arachnae was pulled with such force she toppled over, and two figures fell out of the vents.

“I don’t know how you got Akumatized outside of Paris, but that doesn’t mean you’ll win.”

“Ladybug.” Arachnae snarled.

“What?  Not happy to see me?”

Arachnae gave a war cry and launch herself at the duo.  Ladybug and Hunter jumped out of the way, Ladybug in the opposite direction of the people, Hunter grabbing Titus and bring him over to Damian and Dick. After dropping Titus off Hunter went back to Ladybug’s side; who was dodging Arachnae’s webs and people puppets, and bit one of Arachnae’s spider legs.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH” Arachnae let loose a scream of pain, she turned to Hunter. “You God awful waste of space!”

While facing Hunter, Arachnae left herself for a hit; but the hit wasn’t from Ladybug.  A small black blur cut Arachnae across the arm.

Arachnae hissed at the contact, as Batman dropped down from another vent in the ceiling.

“Batman?!  What are you doing here!” Arachnae growled.

“Really Lila?!  We’re I Gotham, you’re causing trouble and you expect Batman not to show up?” Ladybug’s exasperated voice came.

“Shut-up! And it’s Arachnae!” Arachnae snarled, clearly humiliated.

Batman threw a few more baterangs that exploded into smoke bombs and ran over to Ladybug and Hunter.

“What’s going on?” Batman asked.

“That is Lila, she has been akumatized,” Ladybug started. “Not sure how outside Paris, but that’s worry for later, but we need to find the akumatized object and break it.  That will make her lose any power she has.”

“What’s the object?”

“The only thing it could be is the necklace, everything else is just orange fuzz, but getting close to her is dangerous.  If you get hit by her web, you’ll become her puppet and I rather not fight you Batman.”

“What are your names?”

“I’m Ladybug and this is my partner Hunter.”

*Woof*

The smoke was beginning to clear from Arachnae’s face.

“We better hurry before she…”

Ladybug was cut off by a voice.

“Don’t worry Milady I’ll help you!” Chat yelled, while trying to jump in, only to get hit by on of Arachnae’s webs.

“Not again Chat!” Ladybug cried.

“Does that happen often?” Batman asked, disappointed.

“More than I’ll ever truly admit to” Muttered Ladybug.

“Oh, this perfect! Or should I say purrfect?” Arachnae jeered, as Chat puppet now dangled at the end of her web.

Batman tried to cut the web by throwing some baterangs at it, but they just bounced off.  Arachnae then sent a swarm of people puppets at them. Ladybug then had an idea.

“Batman, I need you to throw more smoke bombs.”

He did as he was instructed.

“Hunter!” Ladybug called out.

Hunter let loose a howl.

Once Hunter’s howl was done Ladybug grabbed Batman and ran behind a pillar.  Once the smoke was cleared Batman carefully looked around the pillar and was stunned when he saw the figures of himself, Ladybug and hunter were still there; Moving, talking and just outright distracting Arachnae.

“How?” Batman was blunt in his question.

“Hunter can cast an illusion, but he can only cast it once before he’s on a time limit.” Ladybug explained.

“And you?”

“This; Lucky Charm!” Ladybug through her Yo-yo in the air and what came down was a bottle of peppermint extract.

Batman gave Ladybug a confused look.

“Lucky Charm only gives me what I need, not what I want.” Ladybug clarified looking around and spotted the sprinklers in the ceiling. “I have an idea; do you think you can cut the necklace off of her neck?”

“Yes.” Batman replied, catching on to her idea.

Arachnae just managed to destroy the illusion; disappearing in a puff of smoke, when Hunter and Batman dropped in front of her.

“Why won’t you do things MY way!” Arachnae screamed.

“Because your way is wrong.” Batman stated, throwing baterangs at her.

Hunter jumped at her spidery legs, barking and biting at them; because he was under her she couldn’t shoot webs at him, but his biting allowed enough distraction for Batman to try and target the necklace.

As the three battled, Ladybug made her way up to the sprinkler system; carefully hooking up the bottle.  Once it was secured Ladybug dropped to the floor and pulled the nearest fire alarm; causing the sprinkler system to go off.

Since Lila was currently part spider, and spiders don’t like peppermint, she started to scream and curl herself into a ball.

Batman saw the opening and accomplished cutting off the necklace; which Hunter caught and brought over to Ladybug.  

Ladybug broke the necklace and release the akuma, catching it with her Yo-yo and cleansing it.

“Bye, Bye butterfly.”

After she was done cleansing the butterfly, Ladybug turned to Hunter and held out her fist.

“Pound it.”

Hunter bumped his nose against her fist

As Lady was cleansing the akuma, and ‘Pounding it’ with Hunter, Batman turned off the sprinklers a brought back the Luck Charm.

“I’m sorry for the trouble.” Ladybug said taking the charm. “I really don’t understand how she did this.”

“Gotham’s use to damage.”

“It doesn’t make it okay, but don’t worry I have something for it.” Ladybug smiled, “Miraculous Ladybug!” Ladybug tossed the bottle in the air and it exploded into thousands of little sparkly pink ladybugs.

The ladybugs swarmed over everything, reversing all the damage, turning people back to normal and healing any injuries.

The barricade Dick, Damian and Titus were behind was cleaned up and put away, leaving two stunned people and a very happy dog; Titus bounced over to Hunter to say Hi.

“Holy Sh*t! How!?” Dick asked looking around.

“Magic!” Ladybug chirped.

A groan caught Ladybug’s attention; it was Lila.  Ladybug made her way over to her.

“So, here we are again Lila.” Ladybug said in a scolding tone.

Lila tried desperately to come up with an excuse.

“It wasn’t my Fault Ladybug! Hawkmoth…”

Ladybug cut her off.

“Hawkmoth doesn’t have the power to akumatize someone in another country, let alone one across an ocean, or he would have been doing it from the start.  Now how did you get akumatized Lila.”

“You can’t prove anything!” Lila tried.

“I can.” Batman said, pulling up some security feed on his computer gauntlet, he projected it for all to see.

The video was of Lila slipping into a hallway, clearly trying not to be seen by people, and when she was done double checking her surroundings; she pulled a little glass jar out of her bag.  That jar contained a purple butterfly.  Lila then opened the jar and let the akuma to fuse with her necklace; creating Arachnae.

The people from Paris gasped.

“I-it isn’t what it looks like…” Lila began.

“Really, because to me this looks like you are either helping a known terrorist or wanted the destructive power at your disposal for whenever you felt necessary.” Ladybug was disgusted, turned to Batman. “Gotham, America in general, are not my territory; how do you want to handle this?”

“The young lady is clearly a threat to people and has purposely tried to harm them; she will be facing justice.” Batman said pulling out a pair of hand cuffs.

“What?...No!  YOU CAN’T!  I’M THE DAUGHTER OF A DIPLOMAT! TWO OF THEM!” Lila tried to fight Batman off, but without the power of the akuma she had no chance.

Around this time the GPD showed up, Batman gave them a quick run down about what happened, and they took Lila away; Batman would be dropping by later with the evidence.  A few stayed behind to take statements.

A frantic beeping was heard.

“I’m sorry Batman; Hunter and I have to return to Paris, out time is almost up.”

“Before you go can you tell how you got here?”

“The horse miraculous can teleport,” Even more beeping, “Thank you for your help Batman, come on Hunter.”

*Bark*

With that Ladybug and Hunter were gone through the vent they entered, leaving Batman and a disoriented Chat behind.  Batman made his way over to Chat.

“How did you get here?” Batman asked, Chat clearly hadn’t come with Ladybug, so he needed to know.

“Uhhh…Got to go!” Chat just ran off.

Batman knew he was just going revert to civilian state somewhere in the building, he’ll look at the security feed later.

“Damian!” Marinette busted into the new repaired lobby with Captain right beside her.

“Marinette!” Damian yelled running over to her “Are you alright?”

“I should be asking you that!  You were the one trapped with her!”

Batman was shocked to see Damian be sweet with a girl, with anyone really, and subtlety glance at Dick. Dick smiled and mouthed ‘Future girlfriend’ to him.

As Damian and Marinette were connecting, Batman noticed a blond boy run into the lobby; from the same hallway Chat ran down.

“Marinette, what were you thinking?” the blond asked running over to her and Damian, interrupting them.

Just as Adrien was about to reach her Captain stepped in front of her in a protective stance; Titus joined him, causing him to stop short.

“Adrien, what are you talking about?” Marinatte asked, standing behind her furry guards.  Damian wrapping his arm around her for comfort.

“You caused Lila to be akumatized!”

“What!  No, I/she didn’t!” Marinette and Damian yelled.

“Yes, she did, if Marinette has just stayed low none of this would have happened.” Adrien insisted.

Batman intervened before Damian could break the boys jaw.

“Young man we have proof that Lila Rossi voluntarily did the ‘akumatization’ to herself.  This young lady had nothing to do with it.”

“B-But Batman; if Marinette hadn’t exposed Lila…” Adrien began, only to be cut off by Dick.

“Hey kid, I’m the one who called out that liar and are you insinuating that you KNEW that she was lying to her classmates?”

“W-Well she wasn’t hurting anyone.”

“Kid you need a lesson on toxic people; BADLY.” Dick shook his head at Adrien.

Adrien was about to say something when he felt a hand on his shoulder; he turned, it was Batman.

“Please return to your class, the police will take your statement.”

“What about Marinette?” Adrien tried, wanting the girl to came back with him and away from Damian and his dog; not that Captain would let him get close.

“I’ll be the one taking her statement, now please return to your class.” Batman stood firm in this.

“I’ll take him back Batman.” Dick offered, grabbing Adrien’s shoulder.

So Adrien shuffled away; being lead by Dick, continuedly glancing over his should at the group.

“Is this normal behaviour for him Angel?” Damian asked.

“When I don’t do what he wants, yes.” Marinette confirmed.

Damian made a face at her answer, but before they could farther into that talk Batman had a question.

“Miss can you tell me more about these ‘Akuma’ and what happened with Ms. Rossi.”

“Sure.” Marinette sighed, “But you’re going to need some back story as well.”

Batman nodded his assent and Marinette gave the entire rundown about what is happening in Paris and the amount of rolls Lila played as an Akuma.  When she was done Marinette was out of breath but looked like the world had been removed from her shoulders.  Damian had pulled her closer as she spoke, and Captain and Titus were trying to cuddle up to her.

There was a beat of silence before Batman spoke.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know how the League missed what was happening.”

“It’s fine Batman, I know the League would never let us flounder if they knew what was going on.” Marinette assured, “Honestly I think magic had something to do with that, but I’m not sure WHY the mayor didn’t contact you.”

“It will be investigated, thank you for your time.” Batman then walked off to talk to an officer.

Once he was gone Damian turned to Marinette; who was still in his arms.

“Are you sure you’re alright Angel?”

“I’m fine Damian, I promise, Captain and I hid in a closet.  Thank you for staying with me though, talking about akums and Lila just takes a lot out of me.”

“Consider what you told me yesterday and what you just told Batman, I think it’s a miracle that you were akumatized yourself.”

“I work hard not to be, but I should be allowed to feel bad without Hawkmoth trying to take advantage of me.” Marinette sighed.

A commotion of noise grabbed their attention, it was Marinette’s class; they were arguing amongst themselves.

“I really don’t wat to go back over there; that looks like pure drama.” Marinette groaned.

“Drama that could have been avoided if they had any common sense.” Damian commented, “Since you don’t wish to rejoin your class, and you’ve already given you statement, would you and Captain like to join Titus and I for lunch again?  We’ll still be in the building and I’ll let Grayson know what’s going on.”

“That sounds wonderful Damian.”

Captain gave a small tail wag and Titus was just happy to spend more time with Marinette and Captain.

“Then it is agreed.” Damian said, sending off a text to Dick and then holding out his arm to Marinette. “Shall we?”

Marinette giggled and took the arm.

“We shall.”

Damian began to lead Marinette and the dogs to the cafeteria.

“I hope the Wayne family isn’t too mad at the problems my class caused.” Marinette commented, making Damian freeze in his tracks.

“Damian?”

“Angel I should let you know; because I would hate you to think I lied to you, but I am Damian WAYNE son of Bruce Wayne.”

“Oh.” Marinette blinked, “Well I hope you and your family aren’t too mad at my class.”

Damian’s was stunned, Marinette saw the look.

“Damian, clearly your family is important, but that doesn’t matter to me; what matters is that you are a good person.  I’ve met other kids from important families, but they were terrible, and I wanted nothing to do with them.  You’ve already proven to be a great person and that’s all I need.”

Damian gave a soft smile.

“Thank you, Angel, you truly are treasure.”

“So, your family won’t be mad?” Marinette asked.

“Nope, Gotham sees more damage than any other place in America, so the problems Rossi caused wouldn’t raise any more attention.” Damian explained. “The fact is was repaired by a hero from Paris will actually draw more attention.”

“Oh.”

“Indeed, now shall we continue to lunch Angel?”

“Definitely.”

So, arm in arm Damian and Marinette went to lunch; Captain and Titus trotting along with them.

 End.

That was Dogs are a Ladybug’s best friend.

 Also

 Extra:

The Day after the Akuma attack:

Wayne Enterprise Employee - *Crying*

Bruce - *Very concerned* What’s wrong?!

WEE - *Still crying* N-Nothing.

Bruce – But you’re crying.

WEE- *Crying* I’m happy!

Bruce – Happy?

WEE - *Crying* Ladybug fixed everything!

Bruce - *Warry* Yes…

WEE - *Crying harder* We don’t need to redo all the paper work!  Or do the added paper work for the repairs!

Other Employees nearby - *Start crying in happiness as well* No extra paper work!

Bruce - *Has no idea how to respond*…

 Extra 2:

Before the trip to Gotham:

Alya – *On her phone* Ooooo a new interview with Ladybug

Alya clicks on the link

Interviewer – So Ladybug who is the new fox?

Alya - *Screaming* NEW FOX!

Ladybug – This is Hunter, he is the new and permanent fox.

Alya – PERMANENT?!

Interviewer – May ask what happen to the old fox?

Ladybug – You can ask, but I won’t give you an answer; I won’t let you take what happened and turn it into a hot topic.

Interviewer – I see…What can you tell us.

Ladybug – Hunter is my trusted partner, don’t be afraid he’s here to help you and me.  Please give him the same respect you would gave me.

Interviewer – Of course!  There has also been a talk about you and Hunter doing a ‘Pound it’ is it true?

Ladybug – This is true, would you like to see?

Interviewer – Yes!

Ladybug – Hunter!

Hunter - *Bark*

Alya – A DOG!!!!! I’VE BEEN REPLACED BY A DOG!!!!!

Ladybug - *Holding out her fist* Pound it!

Hunter - *Bumps nose against Ladybug’s fist*

Interviewer – Awwwwwwwwwww.

Ladybug - *Smiling* I’m sorry, but hunter and I have to go.

Interviewer - *Nodding their head* Thank you for your time Ladybug, Hunter.

Ladybug and Hunter leave.

Interviewer - *Facing the camera* Well there you have folks, we have a new fox!

Alya couldn’t watch the rest of the interview.

Alya – AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

 Extra 3:

Wayne House hold:

They were sitting down to dinner.

Bruce – So, Damian.

Damian – Yes Father.

Bruce – When will you be bringing Marinette over for dinner?

Damian - *Chokes on food* F-Father?!

Dick – Yeah little D, we need to meet your girlfriend properly!

Damian – Grayson!

Jason/Tim – GIRLFRIEND?????

Damian - *Turning red* She’s not my girlfriend!

Bruce - *Smiling* But you called her ‘Angel’.

Damian – FATHER!!!

Tim – When did this happen?!

Jason – What the h*ll did we miss?!

 Extra 4:

Batcave:

Bruce - *Looking at the security footage*

Damian – Father, what are you looking at?

Bruce – Take a look.

Damian sees the blonde boy (Adrien, if he recalled) hiding behind a plant arguing with the air, before he was surrounded by a green light and reappeared as Chat.

Damian - *Not impressed* So he’s a failure on all fronts.

Bruce – So it seems.

 Extra 5:

Adrien Hiding behind the plant when the Attack was going on:

Adrien – *Whispering* Plagg we need to do something!

Plagg – How do you plain on explaining how ‘Chat’ got here?

Adrien – No ones going to ask that.

Plagg – Yes, they will!

Adrien – No, they won’t.

Plagg – Your class may not, but there are others here that have more than one brain cell!

Adrien – Plagg! That was rude!

Ladybug and Hunter show up.

Adrien – *Dreamy sigh* Ladybug…

Plagg – And her PARTNER Hunter.

Adrien - *Not paying attention* Plagg I need to transform.

Plagg – Are you nuts! You can’t transform here!  People will see!

Adrien - *Still paying more attention to Ladybug* Alright Plagg let’s do this…

Plagg - *Beyond frustrated* Kid!

Adrien – Plagg; Claws out!

Plagg - *Is done and wants a new holder*

[arukou-arukou]

A Non-zero Chance

I jumbled the timeline as I was writing this. Just go with it, okay? For @stevetonygames prompt Fluff: Sparring, for team angst. Also adding fic non-linear and tropes: soulmates. Angst with a hopeful ending. Mentions of sex acts. Canon typical violence. There is a read more line after the first section.

 Many many months after that faithful day in Sibera, Tony returned to the scene of the crime. The site was untouched. He hadn’t told Ross about it, and apparently T’Challa had decided well enough was better left alone. The holes they’d put into the bunker of the facility had completely covered over in frost and ice, and Tony had to wonder how Zemo had even dug the little hillock out in the first place. Though there had been a snowcat parked outside when they all first arrived. Without any care, though, it had once again faded into the arctic surroundings. Only someone who knew what they were looking for would find it.

Tony broke in through the holes rather than the front door. He wasn’t really in a mood for digging, and as satisfying as it might be to melt snow with an overloaded repulsor, this mission was also supposed to be stealth and secretive, and he didn’t really need Ross any further up his ass.

Inside, the evidence of their fight wasn’t as big or horrifying as he remembered. There were some structures that had toppled, and a few spots where he’d scorched cement with a repulsor, but it didn’t look nearly as bad as he remembered it being. The Avengers had certainly done worse elsewhere. Tony ran his hand over a shield-shaped crack in the wall.

—

 “This is ridiculous, Cap, we need to know how to fight together, not fight each other.”

Steve smiles back over his shoulder. His ridiculously broad shoulder. “After Wanda mind-whammied us, I’m not taking any chances. We should all know how to incapacitate each other just as a precaution.”

“Only incapacitate, Steve? Not maim?”

Steve chuckles and starts strapping on boxing tape. “No maiming on the docket today. Maybe next Tuesday.”

 —

 Tony followed their trail of destruction back into the heart of the bunker, where the super soldiers still rested suspended, illuminated in sickly yellow. There was the fucking TV, right there. The thing that had ruined it all. Tony stared down at it, wondering where the tape reel itself was located. Probably back in that room Zemo had been hiding in. The bulletproof one. Somewhere in the hallways, Tony could hear water dripping. Impressive, really, given the permafrost all around. He would’ve thought the systems had frozen over long ago. Near his foot, there was a gun, the semi-automatic Barnes had been carrying. It was useless now, its clip and firing mechanisms slagged by his repulsors. He picked it up all the same and aimed it at the glass where Zemo had hidden. The suit’s fingers were too thick to fit over the trigger—what was left of it anyway—so Tony just imagined how satisfying it would be to fill that glass full of shrapnel, to watch Zemo crumple to the ground.

 —

 “Why are you even training me, Rogers? I’m retired. Aren’t you supposed to be looking after the rookies?”

“Just because you’re retired, Tony, doesn’t mean trouble won’t come looking for you. You’re a pretty attractive target.”

“Why yes. Yes, I am. Thank you for noticing.”

Steve punches his bicep gently before offering a bottle of water. Tony takes it, squirting some into his mouth before moving on to his sweat-drenched hair. On Steve’s left wrist, he catches sight of the red band that hides Steve’s words. It would be rude to ask. Totally taboo. But Tony can’t stop himself.

 —

 Tony managed to jimmy his way into the control room, and there he found the VCR, still loaded with the incriminating tape. If he were smart, he would just rip the thing apart, burn the tape and shatter the shell. And Tony was smart. Just not smart in the right ways. He fired up the power to the TV, rewound the tape, and then hit play again. He’d rewound too far. Barnes was in his cryo tube. Some slimy scientists were hauling him out, shoving him into some horrifying chair, pushing down the nodes, saying the words.

No. Tony didn’t want this. He didn’t want to feel sympathy for Barnes. He wanted to let his rage fester and corrode him until he didn’t care anymore. All caring had ever gotten him was betrayal.

 —

 “Do you know who they belong to?” Tony asks, looking up defiantly, refusing to be sheepish about his lack of willpower. Steve glances down at his band before looking up again.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do.” He looks wistful and boyish, sweet and beautiful. Tony wants to kiss away the sorrow he sees in that face.

“Who?”

“Doesn’t matter. He’s dead now.”

“Oh.” Tony touches his own band, thinking of the words beneath. He’s my friend. The most significant thing anyone will ever say to him. The thing that, if the romantics would have him believe it, points him toward his soulmate. He’s never really gone in for that, though. His parents had had each other’s words, and their marriage was anything but blissful and romantic.

No. Tony’s got a different theory about the words.

 —

 There. Tony spotted it before even knowing he was looking for it. On Barnes’ collarbone. Had fate known he would lose the arm? It was unusual for words to be somewhere else on the body. Non-dominant wrist. That was the norm. The tap quality was shit and Tony couldn’t enhance it without bringing the tape back to Fry. And like hell he was bringing the tape home. Were the files somewhere? Hadn’t Zemo had a book? Maybe it was here?

Tony searched the control room, trying to find evidence of the thing Zemo had used to control Barnes. There was no sign of it, but what there were were dozens of filing drawers, all of them covered in a layer of dust. Tony started digging.

 —

 Steve’s off his game today, Tony can tell. He’s distracted by something, mind not in the ring, and Tony takes advantage. Just like Steve and Nat taught him to. He sweeps Steve’s leg, rolls on top of him, pins his leg in a position that's precariously dangerous even for a supersoldier, and applies weight. “Yield?”

It’s late, the halls are quiet. Tony hadn’t even meant to do sparring with Steve today, but Steve had asked, so Tony had delayed his return to New York City and well, the late hour puts his mind elsewhere.

Their eyes lock. Tony’s still on top of Steve, holding him in place, threatening his knee joint. Between one breath and the next, their positions are flipped, Steve on top of Tony, both of them hard, teeth clacking. Tony doesn’t make it back to New York City that night.

 —

 What felt like hours later, Tony finally discovered what looked like a medical log. He’d been trying to learn Russian, but adding a new script was harder than adding a spoken language, and he was a busy man, what with covering Rogers’ ass every other day. Natasha might have been a master spy, but Steve was a puppy who hadn’t learned how to control his tail wag yet, and he left destroyed crockery in his wake. There was always some trail to some terrorist or smuggler or weapons dealer that needed cleaning up, lest Ross take notice. The point being, Tony’s Russian wasn’t exactly sparkling.

But he’d double-checked ahead of time to know what he was looking for and now he was pretty sure he’d found it. Flipping through the file, Tony found what he wanted to know almost instantly. ‘Til the end of the line. The words. Those words.

 —

 It’s a thing. Sort of. Tony comes to the compound. They spar. They fuck. It’s only their third time sleeping together that Steve drags him into the shower, wristband conspicuously absent. Tony touches the thin skin, for once asking permission before he looks down. Steve nods, trusting, contented. I’m with you to the end of the line, pal. “He” Steve had said. Tony doesn’t need to ask to know who “he” is. There was only one really important “he” in Steve’s life way back when. And it makes sense, too. After all, Barnes plunged to his death trying to protect Steve and Steve had tried to protect him just as hard. Of course they’re important to each other.

“Can I see yours,” Steve asks, kissing Tony’s band. Fair’s fair, Tony thinks to himself, and nods.

Steve gently unclasps the snaps and sets the band aside outside the shower. He looks down at the words and then up at Tony with a silent question. “I don’t know whose they are.”

“And you’re still okay with us?”

“Steve, I’m standing naked in a shower with you. I’m pretty damn okay with this.”

The bright grin Steve gives him feels like a gift.

 —

 Tony left, hauling the tape and the filing cabinets behind him. They would be useful sooner or later, he was sure. And it felt so important, hauling his literal baggage along with him back to the US. Well, first a pit stop in Wakanda so Shuri could make copies. Fry flew the quinjet on autopilot, which was maybe a mistake. Tony needed distractions and all he had were files rendered in Russian, which were frankly giving him a headache. He wanted to hate Barnes so much. But fate was literally sending him a message. Barnes. Rogers. ‘Til the end of the line.

Eventually, frustrated, he managed to sink into a fitful sleep, which took him to Wakanda’s borders. T’Challa sent along an escort at the shield wall to make sure Tony was alone and also to make sure Tony didn’t cause any undue trouble. As if he could manage anything more than a nervous breakdown at the moment. Shuri was waiting for him on the platform, and for her and her brilliant mind, he managed a tired smile.

“Brought a present for you.”

“Thank you, Tony. I would get them myself, but—”

“No, no. You’re busy in Oakland kicking science ass and shooting layups with the youth. Let the old guy take care of the analog—” Tony shuddered theatrically “—files.”

Shuri smiled more brightly and kissed him on the cheek. “You look tired. Go see my mother. She’ll be wanting to mother you.”

“I shouldn’t. I’ve gotta—”

“My brother has already ensured that General Ross cannot find you. Go. Eat some food. Get some rest. Perhaps we can talk about your latest arc reactor designs in the morning. I have some ideas.”

“I bet you do.”

Tony knew when he’d been dismissed, and he also knew he was being handled a little, but it felt nice to be handled. It felt nice to not have to be trying to outwit Ross at every turn for a little while. So he allowed Ramonda to stuff him full of delicious, spicy food and then shuffled off to the guest wing, intent on getting at least four hours before he took off.

But the second he laid down, he was awake and restless, unable to settle. His thoughts kept going back to those files, going back to the “end of the line,” thinking again and again about the letters carved into Steve’s skin. How many times had he kissed that wrist? How many times had Steve kissed his? How was it fair, that Steve would be Tony’s words, but Tony wouldn’t be Steve’s?

Fed up, he yanked on a pair of loose cotton pants and a loose cotton T-shirt and wandered the palace, looking for distraction. None of the guards stopped him, though they watched him with considerable distrust. He didn’t blame them. He wouldn’t trust him either. Not anymore. It was only when he heard the sound of skin slapping leather that he stopped short. That sounded like… But it couldn’t be. All the same, he pushed through the door, freezing as he discovered a huge training ground, Steve inside, alone at a punching bag.

Steve froze too, and the bag caught him on the backswing, smacking him straight in the nose. Tony found himself caught between laughing and rushing forward with concern, and ended up doing a bit of both, snorting as he approached, though he remained well out of Steve’s personal bubble. “Smooth, Cap.”

“Tony, what are you doing here?”

Tony scuffed his toes into the mats, which felt solid right up until he kicked them and then gave way like kinetic sand. It felt heavenly and he wanted to play with it and see what it was made out of. “Oh, you know. Just dropped in for a cuppa with the King.”

“Did…did you bring those files?” Steve remained sprawled on the floor, looking up at him, a trickle of blood trailing from his nose.

“And if I did?”

Steve swallowed heavily, rubbing at the blood and smearing it. And then he was up, faster than Tony could react to, holding Tony, kissing him sloppily through mumbled “I’m sorry’s.” Tony didn’t know how to react. Was this what an out-of-body experience felt like? He remained motionless even as Steve broke away, jumping back, looking more unsure than he’d looked since he and Tony first met. “Shit. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… You don’t want…” Steve took a huge breath and squared his shoulders, looking Tony in the eye. “That was wrong of me. I hurt you. In so many ways. It was wrong of me to kiss you.”

“Also pretty sure you’re cheating on your boyfriend if you kiss me. Don’t forget that bit.”

The little line between Steve’s eyebrows deepened. “Bucky and I, we’re not… We’re just not. I thought we would. But I can’t. Every time I tried, I felt like I was betraying you. And Bucky felt like it was wrong, too. We didn’t…we didn’t click. Not romantically, anyway.”

“You’re not…” Tony could barely dare to let himself to hope. “Didn’t you back in the war, though?”

“No. No, we didn’t. It was too much, running missions, fighting Hydra. Plus, he was afraid I’d get caught and outed. So we didn’t. I should’ve told you. But I didn’t think it mattered.”

All the thoughts Tony used to have about the words, the idea that maybe they had nothing at all to do with romance, came back to him. He ran a finger over his own wrist, where Steve’s words were hidden.

“Hey, Steve?”

“Yeah?” Steve stood there, square, looking as though he was waiting to be punched, ready to take his punishment like a man.

“Wanna spar?”

[jq37]

The Royal Report– A Crown of Candy Ep 14 Encounter in the Ice Cream Temple

We All Scream

We return to the Ice Cream Temple after the absolute bombshell that the SPF engineered Jet’s death as a way to get the Candians to her lair and gear up for the fight that that revelation obviously triggered. We get a better idea of the battlefield with the amazing Rick Perry set--like even by his standards it’s amazing, fog is involved. The party is on a ledge on one side of the room and there are huge levitating Popsicles and ice cream cones between them and a massive tower of frozen desserts which has the chocolate egg stuck in it in a little alcove.

As the fight begins, the SPF quickly cycles through all her glamours before revealing her true form, a huge, blue/purple, many-faced, many-winged, angelic type being--but angel in the, “We’re saying ‘be not afraid’ not as a formality but because we know we look scary,” sense. And with a Nat 20 initiative she goes to cast something in a cone that would have hit everyone for 8d8 damage but Rina dispels it with a clutch 5th level Counterspell (rolling exactly the DC without even adding her mod), absolutely foiling Brennan. In celebration, she finally puts the crown on Amethar tossed to her a couple of eps back.

Cumulus does some crazy monk movement to jump all the way across to the alcove with the egg. Unfortunately, the SPF immediately uses a legendary action to hit him with with a Ray of Frost for 27 damage and then gets a lair action to skewer him with an icicle, fully dropping him to death saves. The one small mercy is that Cumulus falls towards the egg, not into the mist.

Liam takes some shots at the SPF, and learns that she has both a really high AC and some kind of Mirror Image spell going to take some of her hits. He also eats the Peppermint Heart Seed the SPF returned to them, hoping it will give him flight like it did to Preston (almost jumping off the ledge to test it) but Brennan rolls on the Wild Magic Table and it instead makes the entire party Invisible. 

Ruby (at Brennan’s mischievous suggestion) jumps off the edge so she’ll be in range to use Mage Hand, ties it to the end of the rope to the closest floating Popsicles (the orange one), and hangs on. In the distance, she can hear her aunts cheering for her. The SPF blasts her with some cold damage, insisting she just wants to take her somewhere safe but Ruby is having none of that.

Amethar throws some javelins which just gets rid of some of the illusions. The SPF does some more damage to Ruby.

Theo, student of Lazuli, realizes that the SPF is like a dragon sitting atop all this magical treasure but she’s not the source of the magic per se and they should be able to get the floating Popsicles to move at their command. He tells everyone and then holds his turn to see if Rina does anything crazy. Rina Thundersteps herself and Theo to the Popsicle Ruby is hanging onto and uses Winterscoop like an oar to try and move it (DC 10 Wis check w/ advantage--Brennan’s one small mercy). She gets it and yells to her guys to jump onto the other Popsicle (the red one) but they aren’t able to move it. With the rest of his held turn, Theo cast Protection From Evil and Good on Rina. 

The SPF tries to blast Rina’s group with another cone attack but Rina stops it cold (ha) with another Counterspell, viably breaking Brennan.

Cumulus fails a death save. Theo takes some cold damage which he lessens with Absorb Elements. Then the SPF casts a spell on Ruby, entering her mind and saying, “You came to me in the glade. Wherever you go, I go.” And she hears a scream from Jet as the SPF begins stitching her own shadow to Ruby. (Spooky, hate that!)

Liam jumps on the red Popsicle and attacks the SPF again, getting rid of the last of her protective illusion.

Ruby swings up to where Cumulus and the egg is. She the rope to Cumulus and pushes him off the edge (Zac’s Face: *Immediate Concern*) so they can pull him up and help him. She also does an Insight check on the egg and feels that the outside is cold but there’s a deep rumbling from within.    

Amethar jumps onto the red Popsicle and is finally able to move it. He gets closer to the SPF to throw some javelins and gets a hit this time but, unfortunately, as the SPF is hit, an identical wound dealing half damage appears on Ruby. Ruby yells this info to everyone else.

Theo again delays his action to wait for Rina to act. Rina Healing Word’s Cumulus both because he’s down and to boost her movement by ten (she gets that free 10 feet of Fly when she casts a spell) and she uses that movement to get within range of the egg and cast Bonfire (a cantrip) on the egg (Ruby insisting she could have done it without help). Brennan, womped thrice, needs a 12 or higher on 2d8 to damage the egg. Rina gets a 13 on the dice without having to even do any Sorcery shenanigans. 

The egg cracks, releasing hot steam, the smell of cinnamon and the most ADORABLE baby dragon that imprints on Rina immediately. Rina coos that she finally has a family.”

“That is mine,” the SPF says.

“Not anymore,” Rina replies. 

Ruby’s Big Day

Jon Bon nails the SPF with a throwing ax, doing half damage to Ruby again.

The SPF does a ton of damage to the red Popsicle peeps and Swifty and Gooey look ROUGH.

Cumulus (after determining that the SPF connection with Ruby will fade soon) jumps and grapples the SPF, doing a successful Stunning Strike, but the SPF uses a legendary resistance to come out of stun and then attacks him, paralyzing him and leaving him to fall.

Ruby tries to figure out if she can do something and Rina says if she trusts her and holds her action, she can do something to help. But it’s not necessary because, on his turn, Liam hits the SPF with a crossbow bolt (Ruby takes no damage as the connection has faded) and then moves the Popsicle under where Cumulus is going to land. The SPF hits Liam for 25 points of damage, taking him down to 9. 

Even though she doesn’t need it to save Cumulus anymore, Ruby still delays her turn to get movement help from Rina (reluctantly). Amethar catches Cumulus out of the air before he hits the Popsicle and then does almost 50 points of damage to the SPF with Payment Day now that he’s in melee range. 

Theo moves the orange Popsicle closer to where the action is happening, Misty Steps to the floating ice cream cone between his Popsicle and the other one, then tries to boomerang his sword to hit the SPF, but it doesn’t hit. 

Rina (slipping into a very Fig manner of speech for a second) asks Ruby, “You wanna go for a ride?” Ruby accepts and Rina (after telling Cinnamon--the newly christened dragon--to fly over to her when he has a chance) Thundersteps herself and Ruby over to the very crowded orange Popsicle with the SPF. She also casts Create Bonfire on the SPF which does double damage--24.

And Ruby decides to take her held turn.

She casts Green Flame Blade on Flickerish--Jet’s sword--and says, “For Jet, bitch.” 

Yak flies over to give her advantage (and make this as cinematic as possible).

Nat 20 bay-bee!

So she’s getting extra dice from Green Flame Blade, Rogue Sneak Attack, Flickerish’s Superiority Dice, and the Nat 20. Siobhan is rolling a DM number of dice here and you truly love to see it. 

Brennan, sensing that, writes a number on a folded piece of paper and hands it to her. The amount of HP the SPF has left. Then he has her roll in the Box of Doom. She lets those colorful dice fly and counts them up--while Brennan looks on with increasing consternation in the background.   

59.

She opens the piece of paper.  

52!

Ruby lands graceful, balancing with her circus training, shadow of Jet being cast tall on the wall of the cavern.

“Can’t you come home with me?” asks the SPF.

“Why don’t you come home with me?”

Ruby thrusts the sword forward and the SPF (who Brennan says was literally just about to use her 9th level spell slot to cast Wish and restore all her HP) is no more. 

Cold Shoulder

Fight over, the mist begins to clear. They see the floor of the cavern is just magical items on magical items and Swifty is stoked as hell. The magic of this place goes from painfully freezing cold and sickly sweet to the good kind of crisp cold and welcoming availability.  

Ruby in her ear hears 4 voices:

“Proud of you, kid.”

“You make it look effortless. I am so proud.”

“Sweetheart, I don’t know where we’re going next. It was nice to be here, but we’re gonna go somewhere we don’t know, but we’re gonna go there together.”

“I was fourth in line and I didn’t know that we were all gonna say something. They didn’t tell me.”

“Look after her please,” Ruby says.

“I wouldn’t dream of doing anything else.”  

Then she feels the embrace of her shadow and it returns to its place.

(“I love you so much. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you.”) 

Rina says to Ruby that she could have finished off the SPF herself but she wanted to let her have the killing blow because it clearly meant a lot to her. She doesn’t know if that will mean anything to her now and she feels that maybe she’s wasting her time continually trying to reach out to her but maybe, someday, it will get through to her. 

Rina’s guys escort her away and she can tell that Gooey has something on her mind. Rina gives her permission to speak freely and Gooey (with Swifty and Jon Bon chiming in) basically says, “Fuck the Candians. They treat you like shit. We’re your real family. You’re gonna be a dope ass queen.”

“You know, it’s funny. That’s the first time someone has called me queen and it hasn’t felt uncomfortable. It actually felt really good.”

Ruby takes another moment of silence for Jet. Theo says that it was always Jet’s dream to be fighting with and for the common people which is Rina’s whole thing. They should be rallying behind her. Ruby and Amethar never even wanted to rule--now he gets to be a warrior again like he wanted. Amethar shoots back with his perspective on the last 4 weeks: his daughter died, he died twice, he decided he was gonna finally man up and bam, it turns out he’s not even king anymore. So excuse him for not being the most gung ho person in the world.  

Theo says that he trusts that Amethar is on board but Rina doesn’t know him. From her POV, this is just unprovoked shunning.

“You have two living daughters.”

Ruby goes to talk to Rina and, on a Nat 20 Insight, sees that all her guys are fully ready to remorselessly kill her if given the order. Still, she presses on, laying out her cards: Her entire worldview has imploded in a matter of weeks. Her twin sister just died. She’s going through so much and now this too? She can’t accept Rina as both her sister and her queen. She has to pick one.

“I understand that you lost everything,” Rina says, “but I was born with nothing.” She says that she was actually very excited to meet Ruby and have a sister and finally not be alone anymore, tears cracking through her cold facade for a moment. But then she gathers herself. 

“If I must choose, then I choose to be your queen.” 

“Very well.”

Rina and her crew exit the Temple and start down the mountain. Everyone except for Liam follows them. Liam goes to check on the hoard and rolls a 24 Investigation check. At the base of the tower he sees an old lair with ancient chocolate eggshells. He knows this is the dark space from his dreams and he knows this was once a dragon lair. At the center of the nest (which is still somehow warm), there’s a little ember that glows brighter as he approaches. It grows red and bright, filling his vision, a hand reaches out, grabs his throat and pulls and we end the ep!   

Medal of Honor

Killing a god should be enough to get anyone this spot.

But killing a god with only a 7 point margin on a Nat 20 in order to avenger your sister’s death with her own sword a turn before said god was about to down a Full Restore?

Ooh, man. All hail Princess Ruby Rocks baby!

Things I’m Concerned About

OK, I mentioned last week I was worried about Rina doing a Cat's in the Cradle but I said I’d elaborate later and what I feared seems to be materializing so I’m going to talk about it now. Rina clearly had a certain vision of what she wanted this family reunion to look like and, for valid reasons, it’s not happening that way. They’re not really bonding. So what this ends up being is them relying on her in battle but brushing her off socially--at least that’s what it looks like from her POV. And like, she’s been around for like 2 days so it’s kind of unreasonable for her to expect them to be fully on board already but I see where she’s coming from. If I grew up as basically a Dickensian orphan and a princess told me a sob story (however valid) I wouldn’t be impressed. It would be a complicated situation even without a war happening in the background. On top of that, Rina is surrounded by Yes-Men which concerned me from the start when Gooey pulled her aside that first time. The last time we had the potential for serious party conflict in D20 (not counting Bloodkeep because I maintain that, despite the setup and Brennan’s best efforts, that was never going to happen) was the Kingston/Pete situation and that ended up fizzling out but idk man. That conversation Rina had about how it felt kinda nice to be called queen? That def set off some alarm bells in my head. I don’t know enough about GoT to know if this is a totally valid statement but when she got the dragon and then that convo happened I was like...hmm...how does Dany’s story end again?

Lol also, whatever the heck is going on with Liam and the dragon. Really this should be first but, I’m gonna be real, the Rina thing was so much that I fully forgot this was a thing that also happened. 

I’m concerned about whatever happens next ep that was so bad they’ve been talking about it for ages. Feeling pretty trepid about that my guys. 

We haven’t heard from Annabelle and Primsy in a while and that doesn’t necessarily mean anything bad but...hmm...

Five A Few More Things

Ah yes, the return of the, “Why can’t a butterscotch bird help me perform first aid?” argument. “Are you telling me a bird can’t save someone’s life?”

“Give me the child.” Brennan, I know I say this a lot but if anything happens to Cinnamon...a single thing...a solitary hitpoint...Brennan…

 There's a bit where Cumulus rolls like a 9 and Ally goes, “Can he get advantage from the egg?” And Siobhan makes a face like, “Fully what?” but then a second later is like, “That’s a great question,” totally straight-faced and it’s so funny.

I wonder if Rina’s peeps feel the way they do about the whole party? Because Theo is honestly (in Murph’s words) also one of her goons practically and Cumulus pledged the orders’ services to her. You’d think they’d get consideration. 

When Cinnamon gives Rina a Help action she goes, “I’ve never gotten  Help action before,” and I understand what she meant but also, lol, she gets Help actions like every turn from her guys.

“Don’t come after my distant cousin!”

Very happy that if combat is happening in our story eps we’re getting some story in our combat eps. Getting a significant chunk of immediate aftermath is very cool and something I often wished for in the other main seasons.

FYI: Celestial is Liam’s Greater Favored Enemy. 

Brennan really does love to undercut the tenseness of the situations of his dark world by reminding us all that it’s also deeply stupid and made of candy and I think that’s great. 

One More Thing

Two big fandom art things are happening right now that I want to shout out:

(1) Until the 24th, D20 is accepting CoC fanart for their finale montage. The email is svod@chmedia.com and the details are on their Twitter. 

(2) A fan run event is also happening--as big bang (which is a fanfic-visual art team-up thing that I’m learning about for the first time but seems really cool). Info for that is here. 

[hopeaterart]

I’m gonna be there Chapter 10

Joot and Kak vs Rubber Soul

(WARNING: Rubber Soul, at some point, uses a language that implies Kakyoin and Dio were an item back when Kakyoin was under Dio’s control. I’m gonna say now it wasn’t the case, but still. If you’re sensible to that kind of stuff, be careful while reading.)

Noriaki blinked, shocked at the sudden accusation. He then frowned. “What do you mean by that?”

“Her- their eyes are too dark,” Jotaro started, “they’re too tall, their voice is too deep and flat, their mouth is too wide, and my mom isn’t a passive-aggressive bitch.”

Noriaki slowly nodded, taking a hold of Jotaro’s hand that wasn’t busy with his iced coffee. “Come on, Jotaro-kun. We don’t want to keep Seiko-san waiting.” As they started walking behind ‘Holly’, their voice switched to a whisper, not letting the imposter hear them. “Maybe she’s just in a bad mood?” The redhead proposed.

Jotaro just shook his head. “Mom in a bad mood looks like when she was fighting Polnareff.”

“... so when your mother gets mad, she starts acting like you? Or is it the other way around?”

“What?”

“Did you base your entire delinquent persona on your mother when she’s mad, Jotaro Kujo?” Noriaki asked, looking genuinely curious.

The taller teen spluttered, his cheeks reddening. “N- not all of it-” he got out as Kakyoin snorted, but the quickly calmed down as ‘Holly’ turned toward them.

“Well? Why’re you boys dragging around for?” The imposter asked, and Noriaki heard Jotaro’s teeth gritting more than he saw them.

He waved his hand dismissively, putting on his best attempt at a smile. Time for a test. “Don’t worry, Holly-san. Just talking about school stuff.” ‘Holly’ rolled their eyes and shrugged, resuming their walk as Noriaki nodded to himself.

Holly had insisted for the redhead to call her Seiko, at least in public.

“See?” Jotaro hissed. “Not mom. What are we supposed to do?”

“On one side, we could leave and go find Seiko-san.” Noriaki mentioned. “It’s very likely something happened to her.” Jotaro’s face twitched with worry at the mention of anything bad happening to his mother. “On the other one, this person is likely to have been sent by Dio. If we take care of them now, we can go find your mother without worrying about being found.”

“What if they have someone else helping them?” Jotaro asked.

Noriaki shook his head. “Unlikely, Stand Users attract each other, but there’s a reason most of them decide to go live in isolation. Most of the time, being a Stand User correlates heavily with being a world-hating jackass.”

“Oh.” The taller teen seemed to think for a moment. “Can you punch them first? I don’t feel comfortable punching someone who looks so much like my mom.”

“Oh, I can do much better than punching.” Noriaki assured Jotaro with a smile that would be too wide on anyone’s else face, but fit just right on his. “Can you hold my icecream?” As the taller teenager did so, he took a few step backs, propped himself to take a running start, called out Holly’s name, yelled ‘wanna see me do a flip?’, and cartwheeled himself, using the momentum to launch himself to kick them in their face. 

He heard their face crack and felt his foot sink into it, quickly jumping off and landing on the floor in a low crouch. ‘Holly’ turned toward him, their face deformed and eyes glowing a sickening yellow. “What was that for, you little shit stain!?” They yelled, their deformed voice clearly not Holly’s.

Noriaki got back up as Jotaro came near, fury barely concealed on his face. “Knew it.” The taller teen muttered.

“You need to work on your acting skills.” The redhead told the imposter. “Jotaro-kun knew the moment he took a look at you. And you didn’t get your facts about Seiko-san straight.”

“Who the fuck is Seiko!?”

“My point exactly.” Noriaki nodded to himself.

“The point is,” Jotaro hissed as he moved to stand next to the redhead. “we know you’re not mom, the jig is up!”

“Oh, really? In this case...” ‘Holly’ started, their face gradually starting to melt before melting off in yellow goo, their whole body going with it and revealing a man that was naked from the waist up. “No need to hide my beautiful face anymore!”

“... so. When is disguise coming off?” Kakyoin asked with a raised eyebrow, and had the situation been any less dire Jotaro was pretty sure he would’ve laughed.

“If I was you, I’d be more scared of my Yellow Temperance.” The man sneered, before pointing down at Noriaki’s foot. The same yellow goo that was surrounding him was slowly creeping up his shoe, the redhead frowning. “It’s going to slowly eat you. Do you understand that? And if you try to get it off, it’ll just spread faster-”

“You do realize I can simply take my shoe off, yes?” Noriaki asked, raising an eyebrow as he started kicking his shoe off. “Demonstration:” The redhead then back flipped, his shoe flying off and hitting the enemy straight in the face. He yelled, clutching his nose and groaning as the teenager turned toward, flipping his hair out of his face and grinning.

“You think you’re so smart, uh!?”

“I mean, you’re the one getting his ass beat by a skinny teenager right now.” Jotaro sneered. “Seriously, Kakyoin-kun’s light enough for me to throw him around. Literally.”

“It’s not our fault you’re an idiot.” Noriaki sing-songed, his smile wide and mocking. The smile left his face as their enemy started laughing lowly, slowly morphing into something higher pitched. “What’s so funny?”

“No, no, it’s just funny that you of all people think you’re hot shit.” The man sneered. “With all the stuff Dio did to you, I would’ve thought you’d be more spineless.”

“... What are you talking about?...” Noriaki asked in a shaky voice, feeling a dull throb start in his head. Worry started pooling into his chest. 

“I mean... you always did do everything he asked you to.”  The man started, sending a leery look at the redhead. “I’m sure you enjoyed how he treated you.”

“It’s not- I had a fleshbud in my head!” Noriaki snapped. “I wasn’t in control of my actions!”

“Still, Dio seemed pretty attached to his little toy. He wants someone to bring you back to him.” Ice ran through Noriaki veins as the man started bragging about how Dio was going to reward him, memories of sickly sweet words being whispered into his ears and sharp pain he did not ask for erupting into his mind.

He started breathing heavily, not noticing the person next to him leaning down.

“Kakyoin-kun?” Noriaki snapped his head toward Jotaro, who seemed worried at the look of panic written all over the other’s face. “Are you... okay?”

“I... I don’t know.” The redhead admitted, averting his gaze and doing his best to ignore their enemy's laughter.

Jotaro turned toward the man, anger starting to take a forefront at his mind. He handed Noriaki their snacks from earlier. “Hold this.” He then started walking toward their opponent.

Said opponent just laughed. “What? Don’t you think it’s a little too late to defend the sl-”

[ORA!]

“ACK!” Noriaki blinked in surprise. Jotaro had called out his Stand, the purple spirit punching the shapeshifter in the throat with a furious look on his face, who was now coughing and taking a step back, part of his Stand having faded away.

“Look.” The teenager started, his hands coming out of his pockets to crack his knuckles. “No one is ever going to say that Jotaro Kujo is a nice person. When I get into a fight, I tend to overdo it and send everyone in emergency. I didn’t like a teacher, so I made sure he would never walk again. I often don’t pay when I go at restaurants. And you’re just a guy doing his job.” One of his hand came up behind his neck. “The thing is, I’m just serving justice when no one else will. I never throw the first punch. The teacher was harassing girls at my school. The restaurant’s food is lousy. And you’re trying to kill us.”

“Wh- what’s your point, shithe-”

[ORA!] Noriaki nearly snorted as Jotaro’s Stand punched it’s opponent in the throat again.

“Don’t. Interrupt. Me.” Jotaro hissed, bending down so he was at eye level with the guy. “It’s rude. And you’ve talked my ears off about how this Dio guy took advantage of Kakyoin-kun, so you’re gonna deal with me talking about justice. And unlike you, I have a point to make. Evil,” the teen pointed his finger for empashis. “is when you use the weak for your own gain. And good is when you punish evil, yes? Let’s just say that me not being nice won’t prevent me from being good.”

“You- did you really just- why did you give me such a long-winded speech!?”

“To make you understand just how badly you and Dio fucked up.” Jotaro said, standing back to his full height and looming. “Had you kept your mouth shut, I wouldn’t have gotten involved in this fight. And had Dio not decided to go after my family, we would’ve never heard about him. Do you understand? You opening your damn mouth is the final nail in Dio’s coffin, aka the one my family’s gonna bury him in. And as for you...” 

Earlier, during his discussion with Noriaki, Jotaro had smiled for the first time in a long while, happy at having found someone who understood him.

Now, he was smiling again, his teeth showing in a display that looked more like he was barring them. 

“I’m gonna enjoy bringing justice down on you.”

[ORA! ORA! ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA!] Jotaro’s Stand bellowed out, Noriaki watching in amazement as the shapeshifter was pummeled to a paste. [ORA!!!]

Their enemy then flew onto the lower floor, landing into a fountain just as Holly came into view. The blonde woman blinked, looking at the man in the fountain, before turning her head up and looking at the two teenagers. “Boys, what’s going on, here?”

“Don’t worry, Seiko-san.” Noriaki yelled from his point, giving his iced coffee back to Jotaro. “It’s just an enemy Stand User with shape shifting abilities. He pretended to be you!”

“Oh!” Holly exclaimed as vines started wrapping around of her legs, moving to stand close to the defeated. “In this case.” She then kicked him the crotch and electrified him with Hamon, making him cry out, before calling down the two teenagers. “Are you two finished with your shopping? I’m gonna go load the groceries in the car.”

“Coming, mom.” Jotaro yelled, before turning toward Noriaki and taking his hand. “Come on, let’s go.”

The redhead nodded, following the taller teenager as they made their way down, finishing his ice cream. “Jotaro-kun?”

“Yeah, what?”

“For what it’s worth, I think you’re very nice.”

“... Thanks.”

[quatschmachen]

Bitchumen

A nice heartwarming sort of xmas fic. Phone call takes place in 2000, the xmas in 1999.

Edward rants to someone about something.

XXX “Right, like you can actually understand what’s going on.” The sarcasm dripped thick like bitumen from Edward’s tongue, the sticky anger clinging to every surface.“You treating me with the polite decency of a stranger doesn’t actually make you a good person, Calvin – it doesn’t even make you a friend.”

Blowing a breath out, Edward rubbed his face, his shoulders stuck between wanting to spike up in stiff defense or simply drop down in defeat.

“Which is why you get the couch,” here his arms crossed, brooking no argument, “I don’t even know why you thought it was going to be fine just showing up, months after being an asshole thinking I would even put you up. I just know Edith would have you out on your ass, and honestly you’re lucky you got me when I was even in town. Hold on… Mr. Big Shot, you have enough money to get a fucking hotel room, why the shit am I even considering you to stay here with me? Why the hell am I not throwing you out on your ass?”

Another breath out, and Edward sighed, “No, this won’t do.”

With a slump, he plopped onto the couch, and glanced around his small living room, wondering why the hell he was even practicing this as a conversation. Calvin hadn’t dropped by in months. It wasn’t like he was going to any time soon. The lines had been clearly drawn, and even an entitled oil cowboy wasn’t going to pretend everything hadn’t changed.Apparently the weeks off were just giving him time to go crazy. Usually this would be the time he would jet off to Montreal, but instead he was stuck in his house losing it. He was worried if he showed up on Étienne’s doorstep he would just start crying. Definitely not a thing to do.

His thoughts were disrupted as the telephone began to ring. With a sigh, he rolled off the couch and grabbed it. “Hello?”

“Eddy!” Étienne’s voice rang out through the phone and wrapped around him like a warm hug.

“’Tienne,” Edward breathed out, automatically relaxing, he flomped down into the seat beside the telephone.

“I’ve been calling for weeks and thought you had died,” he joked, but the edge of worry was still there.

“Sort of had.” Edward murmured, “Actually I sort of moved out, I guess. Mac came down in January and I ended up moving north with him and picked up a hitch. Just got off and am laying around at home too dead to do anything.”

“Hitch?”

“Uhm working in the oil patch. Living at camp, pretty much isolated from the world…”

“Surrounded by big burly men? You could have at least sent me a postcard, Eddy,” Étienne teased, but there was an underlying tone Edward had difficulty deciphering, “I was thinking if it was my turn to come pull you out of the swamp of misery.”

“I guess I could have but… to be honest it all sort of just happened?” Edward sighed, “And once I was up in Fort Mac, and then out working, it’s difficult to really communicate. Just work till you drop, then into the camp to exercise or watch porn.”

“What? They actually supply porn?”

“And sometimes even prostitutes, but that’s apparently not truly allowed…” Edward paused, “but unfortunately no prostitutes were of interest to me.”

“How unfortunate. I was up to my eyeballs with inconvenient work,” Étienne paused, “Christmas was about the same as always, Suzette passes along her best wishes. The food was divine, and I ended up losing an arm-wrestling match to Élyse.”

Edward laughed, “What were the stakes?”

“Hmmm, well she got to eat my slice of cake; it was some terrible cake Samuel had made – yes I know, please believe me when I say he made this cake. Truly no real artisan of food would have produced something as terrible as that cake. I think it ostensibly was supposed to be a fruit cake – with a thick layer of chalky marzipan on top. Somehow he managed to over-alcohol a cake while having it be dry at the same time. I was ready to submit it to the Guinness Book of Records…”

“So why was Élyse battling you for your slice?”

“You see, I may have already had a fight or two with Samuel – he has some new boytoy, and he was being so insipid and sickly about it, I may have been ready to fight over any little thing. Élyse figured if I got rid of the slice via arm wrestling it could possibly save Christmas or something. Yadda yadda. Apparently no one seems to enjoy the Christmases when Samuel breaks down in angry tears and yells for an hour – not sure why when I find that sooooooo entertaining.”

“God I wish I was there for that… seeing Samuel’s face as if he was punched when he tries to cry elegantly is so therapeutic…” Edward murmured, “I feel like my Christmas was just me being the crying one.”

“Crying? What happened, Édouard?”

Squiggling in his seat, Edward wondered how much he should tell. A part of him wanted to spill it all, but another part wondered if that would be too much of an inconvenience. How much of his stupid worries did Étienne really want? Closing his eyes, Edward pretended they were in the same room together, maybe even touching, head on Étienne’s shoulder, not necessarily looking at the man, but bodies snuggled up, his hair getting played with. Those small stolen moments of bliss, where the worries got spilled, and he didn’t worry about the consequences.

“Christmas was so awkward; I don’t even know where to begin. The entire time I desperately wished I had gone to yours… it felt like the last time I try to be a functional person among them… hell, I only went because I thought maybe I could improve relations with people… start the new millennium off with some hope about the future.”

It really had been terrible. They had held it at the ranch – Bert’s ranch. Why the hell did he think hanging out with people at the ranch would be a good idea? Surrounded by people you probably should know better, but in reality only held passing pleasantries with. The one bright spot had been Calvin. Calvin who seemed to be best buddies with everyone who arrived, Calvin who smiled brightly at him and argued with him, distracting him from the knot of anxiety he was harbouring over whether he should come out during Christmas or hold off until New Years?

He was attempting small talk with Jo, who was talking at him about how they should go shopping together (did she not do other stuff?), when he overheard Bert loudly say “I personally don’t think those fags should be given the deal.”

It felt like time had slowed down for Edward. No one seemed to pause or care. Orson in fact nodded along with Bert’s rant, sipping his Sprite. Jo continued on with her plans for her next visit, and somewhere nearby Red laughed at a joke Madeline made. As he observed the room to see if there was any reaction to Bert’s loud rant, everyone was involved in their own conversations. Calvin was in the distance deep in conversation with someone he could not quite make out. 

Right, this was not the place. He still wanted turkey dinner, and as he dimly nodded along to Jo, Edward felt small. He had no allies here. Well, that wasn’t true. He was sure Edith supported him, but one in how many? Edward didn’t want to ‘ruin Christmas’.

“And you know how I’ve been thinking about coming out and stuff, but uh, can I just say no? If you were in the room you would understand – seriously Étienne, these people who claim to be my so called family would just as well lynch me as their Christmas bonfire – I dunno they could just douse me in bitumen and light me up human torch Christian martyr style for bringing the faggotry home for Christmas… Soooo I didn’t want to ruin Christmas and make the event awkward for everyone,” Edward related over the phone.

“And then horror of horrors, Orson managed to corner me in what he thinks is jovial conversation. It felt like everything he had to say to me was condescension masked in care and concern – honestly I am not sure how he even manages that. I think he felt like it was his civic duty to carry on a conversation with me. He even reminisced about the temple open house he dragged me to. Ok honestly I went to the open house out of curiosity, to see what sort of cult he’s in, but I didn’t think he would already be reminiscing about something that had literally JUST happened. Temple? Yeah, a Mormon temple just opened up in my city… so it meant I had the pleassssuuure of Orson coming up for the Open House and dragging me along. Stay with me? God no, please ‘Tienne I’m not that insane, what would I do if he snooped and found my big old dildo? Yeah he was staying with some church people since he was volunteering and such.”

“I think I wanted to die when he sat down at the piano – yeah, I didn’t even think Bert ever tuned that thing, but knowing Orson maybe he came extra early to tune it, and began banging out the Christmas carols. Like he’s talented and all, and I don’t mind a round of Jingle Bells, but he really has this creepy 1950s vibe and I wanted to roll my eyes when his eyes started to shine with unshed tears at Away in a Manger and O Holy Night.” Edward twisted the cord around his finger, as he listened to Étienne chuckle. Apparently the tactic was avoid talking about himself and instead rant about goody-two-shoes Orson? “You should count yourself lucky you don’t have to deal with him on a regular basis… mmm? Yeah he is kind, considerate and is literally the guy to volunteer for the worst tasks but there is something about him where he is a little too perfect? Like somehow can’t let my hair down around him type of deal. Which makes him perfect for Lilith – as she always has her hair up, haha.”

Edward had relaxed into his seat, somehow feeling lighter, as the words slipped out, “And then New Years was somehow worse… no I wasn’t at the ranch. I probably should have taken you up on your fireworks show, because the one here is uh Edmonton grade. You know – trying real hard but still somehow failing to miss the mark,” he chuckled at his own joke, not picking up on the strained tension from Étienne over the phone. “Calvin came up, which surprised me since I assumed he would want to be gallivanting about in Calgary, but apparently he wanted to spend it with his best buddy which is me? Somehow? Don’t worry Teddy, you’re still my best friend…” Edwards voice lowered, as he realized what he was about to say, admit. Pause. “So how was your New Years? Aahh why are you yelling – oh you’re saying I didn’t mention why New Years sucked? It’s because it wasn’t with you, darlin’.”

Somehow Edward couldn’t do it. Couldn’t quite bring himself around to admitting he had come out to Calvin. How he had fallen into a depression when he got outright rejected. “Hmm? Well, how else can I put it… while I could have been kissing you and sucking your cock, I instead got to hold Calvin’s hair back as he literally puked in my poinsettias… yes… mmhmm. The poor plant didn’t make it.”

Tangling his finger in the phone cord, Edward found himself relaxing as Étienne told him about his New Years event, feeling like he had dodged a bullet. The other man’s voice soothing him. Trying to be home for Christmas and the New Years - attempt to enter the new millennium as a man of his own place, had been a major mistake.

He should have kept to his original plans of escaping to Montreal, escaping his own clay dirt to mold himself into his own dream man.Sometimes he wondered if he loved Étienne or simply wanted to be Étienne. A complicated mixture of feelings confusing him ever more when it came to that man.

“Visit? I would love to visit… oh wait, you want to come visit me? When? Hmm let me… check my calendar.” Edward sat up, looking around, and then picked up the phone, carefully picking his way into the kitchen, so he could squint at the calendar. His telephone cord ran out though, so he had to do an awkward strain, trying not to unplug the phone, while seeing his own scribbled-in life.

Well… the only thing really was his work shifts. Everything else a blank. “How does this time work? You’re booked up. Alright…” Edward and Étienne haggled over dates, until somehow, it lined up that Edward was going to Montreal. A subtle shift, but as Edward said with some practicality – that’s just how it lined up. As he hung up the phone, he wrote down the date of his trip, feeling better. Now in between work was a small bright spot, one small thing to look forward to.He was not as friendless as he thought, and, perhaps with enough courage, he could finish his New Years story.        

[supersickies]

Summary: “It went without saying that getting bitten by a radioactive spider had its perks.

But apparently a cure for the common cold wasn’t one of them.”

-

College final exam season leaves Peter sick with a nasty cold, and on his wonderful girlfriend Michelle's first day of her summer internship too. Now it's up to mama Pepper and little sis Morgan to nurse their favorite spiderling back to health.

A/N: This was intended to be a little drabble based on a post I saw (I can’t find it for the life of me but once I do I’ll reblog it asap) but it ended up being a 5k+ fic of sweet sick Peter and his mess of a family. I couldn’t help it I love them all too much. You can read it on Ao3 or under the cut! Whatever what works for you!

Spider-Man can, in fact, catch a cold. This was something that Peter was surprised, yet annoyed to discover. Before the bite, Peter was a sickly, asthmatic, all around fragile kid, and while it wasn’t something that he was exactly confident about he never let it crush his spirit. However, that didn’t mean that as soon as the spider bite rid his body of all his past ailments Peter wasn’t overjoyed. He could finally run a mile without having to stop a quarter of the way through or eat a PB&J without having to instantly call an ambulance. It went without saying that getting bitten by a radioactive spider had its perks.

But apparently a cure for the common cold wasn’t one of them.

He and Mr. Stark discovered this about a year after he was bitten when he had come down with a nasty case of bronchitis that had him hacking all over the compound for four days. Since then Peter was bound to catch a bug here and there, much like he used to before the bite just less severe. It was harder for him to catch things as well, his immune system was usually a force to be reckoned with, unless for any reason Peter was not at “peak Spidey performance” as Mr. Stark would say.

Which leads us to now, a mere 24 hours after the last final exam of his junior year at Columbia, Peter was laid in bed suffering through what he would consider the nastiest cold he’d ever had.

It was barely after sunrise, the clock reading a taunting 5:30, and Peter doing everything he could not to sneeze. With deep, even, wheezy, breaths, the spider-boy was using all his strength to keep the sneeze at bay for one reason. MJ. His lovely, wonderful, amazing Michelle who was starting her first day of her summer internship at nine and would massacre Peter if he woke her up before her alarm. The girl loved her sleep, and Peter would be damned if he deprived her of it.

Think of anything else Peter, literally anything. Remember that big biker guy you helped on patrol the other week? He was pretty nice…oh god it iiihhtches…no, enough Peter, biker guy. Right he had that cool jacket with the patches, I bet I could pull off a leather jacket. Maybe put a spidey patch on the back? Fun…cool…really gotta sneeze. Ugh, FUCK! Okay, okay maybe if you just do that pinch-y sneeze, like Ned and Natasha do…heh imagine Ned knowing he had the same sneeze as Black Widow, he’d flip. Ehh..fuhhhhuck okay thats it, pinch-y sneeze please don’t fail me.

With a shaky hand Peter pinches his nose between his thumb and his forefinger, the motion instantly making his nose tickle more and within seconds Peter was attempting, and failing, to stifle his sneeze.

And it failed hard.

The sneeze was stronger than it seemed and instead of being held back and becoming a noiseless stifle, it came out louder than it should have as it scraped the back of his throat, causing barking coughs to escape as well.

Well everyone, bid him farewell, this will be the day that Peter Parker meets his untimely demise. He instantly feels MJ stir against him with a groan. She was up, oh god sound the alarm she was awake.

“P’ter? That you?” She slurs, sleep lacing her voice.

“Umb, yeah. Sorry embjay I didn’d mbean to sndeeze.” God how he wished his could blow his nose, but he was not going to poke the bear any further.

It was quiet for a moment, Peter knew that he was in danger. MJ was plotting how she was going to murder him and it was only a matter of time before she-

“You feeling okay, baby?” Her angelic voice rings as she turns to face him on the bed. “You sound terrible.”

It was like music to Peter’s ears. He would live to see another day! He was almost shocked, she didn’t even pepper in the classic “loser” nickname. She was concerned. Wait, did he really sound that bad? Should he be concerned?

Peter clears his throat before responding. “I-I thingk I’mb combing down with sombthing. I’mb sorry I’ll try to be quieter.” A wet sniffle concludes his sentence. Damn it he really wants a tissue.

Almost as if MJ could read minds, she places a soft white Kleenex into his hand. “Blow your nose, Pete. I’m gonna go get the humidifier, you’re way too congested.”

“O-Oh, okay. Thangk you Emmby.” He uses her absence to sit up a little and expel the nasty gunk from his sinuses. He still can’t completely breathe, but it’s better than it was before. MJ comes back into the room moments later, carrying the chunky machine. The water inside of it sloshes a bit as she set’s it on Peter’s bedside table but as soon as she plugs it into the wall, a warm soft mist starts flowing from its lid. Peter can’t tell a difference now, but he knows it’ll make a difference the longer it runs.

Satisfied with how the humidifier is working, Michelle sits beside Peter on the bed and looks at him quizzically. “How’d you get so sick?” She questions, her fingertips reaching to brush Peter’s bed head away from his eyes. His forehead moderately warm, but it doesn’t feel like anything that provokes worry.

He hums at her soft touch but shrugs his shoulders at her question. “Don’t kdnow,” He presses the tissue to his nose as it starts running, the humidifier must be working. “I felt fidne yesterday. Mbaybe kinda tired but ndot sick.”

“You know what it probably is?” Michelle says. “All those nights up late studying, not to mention all that trash food you ate-“

“What is this, mbake fun of your poor sick boyfriend day?” He gives a wet coughs for emphasis, and because he really needed to cough.

“Sorry sicky,” She giggled. “what I’m saying is that you had a long hard week and you weren’t exactly taking the best care of yourself. No shame in it, I mean, it happens to everyone but I think your body is so used to you eating well and exercising often that as soon as you stopped your immune system freaked out.

Clearing his throat, Peter nods. “I guess that mbakes sense.” He looks down with a sigh, thinking of all the things he was scheduled to do today. “I better call Todny and tell him I can’t combe in to the lab.” He sighs and reaches for his phone but MJ intercepts.

“First you’re going to go back to sleep until a reasonable hour. It’s almost 6 a.m. Parker, and my alarm goes off at 8, so I’d like a few more hours of rest.” She jabs, pulling the covers up to his chin and kissing him softly on the cheek. “And you definitely need the beauty sleep.”

Peter chuckles at that, which only lead to more hacking coughs. MJ softly pats his back until the coughs subside. With a tsk she tucks him into bed once more before rounding the bed to lay back down on her side. “Rest, I’ll let you know when I’m about to head to work.”

With his eyes closed and his breathing only slightly less congested, thank you humidifier, he smiles contently. “Thank you Emmby, love you.”

“Love you too, snotty.”

Peter wakes again to a kiss on the forehead and the scent of strong perfume making his nose tickle. Before he even opens his eyes, he curls in on himself and muffles three sneezes into his pillow. Ugh, gross. He opens his bleary eyes to see MJ smoothing out her work outfit in their full length mirror. She looks amazing as usual, Peter notes, but her perfume is strong. Or maybe he’s just way too sensitive, a super cold and super senses probably don’t mix well. Without warning, two more sneezes barrel out and he barely has time to cover them. With a groan he sniffles thickly and reaches for the tissue box conveniently placed on his bedside table. He get a warm and fuzzy feeling as he realizes MJ had put them there for him, as they weren't there when he had woken up earlier. It’s the little things. He blows his nose, which get’s MJ’s attention.

She glances over to him with a smile. “Good morning, again.”

“Good mbornding, you look ambazindg.” He rasps, a goofy smile painting his face.

MJ breathes out a laugh at her dopey boyfriend. “Thank you, dork. How’re you feeling?”

He snuggles deeper into the bed, closing his eyes again and coughing weakly. “Call a physiciand,” Peter jokes in a congested and bad British accent. He throws a hand over his forehead for good measure. “I believe it mbay be the plague.”

MJ snorts a laugh at her boy’s dramatics. “Okay, you sickly child king.”

Her heels clack against the hardwood floor of the bedroom as she steps over to where he lies in their bed. As she sits on the bed, her soft hand cups his forehead and then his cheek. “You’re soft.” He mumbles, leaning into her touch.

“And you are running a bit of a fever.” She rubs her thumb sweetly over his cheek before standing back up. She tells him to sit tight and goes to the bathroom to grab a digital thermometer. She returns to find him dozing so she gently brushes his hair back to get his attention. He lifts his eyes to see the thermometer in her hand and opens his mouth just wide enough that she can slip the device under his tongue. “Give that a minute.”

MJ walks out of the room a moment later and Peter hears running water from the kitchen. The thermometer beeps right before she reenters, ice water with a straw in hand. Peter didn’t realize until he saw it just how thirsty he was. He stares at her lovingly as she takes the thermometer from between his lips. “Are you a mbind reader?” He asks, only semi-joking as he sits up slightly to sip the water.

Michelle scoffs lightly. “You bet your ass I am.” She jokes looking down at the medical tool. “Hm, 100.8. Not horrendous but I don’t love it.” Once again she’s gone, this time to the bathroom where Peter hears more water running, making him want to take another sip of his water. He sighs as the cool drink soothes his dry throat. MJ strides back to the bed with a damp face towel folded in half. When she starts to dab Peter’s forehead with the cool cloth he can’t help the shuddering sigh that escapes him. She stops. “You alright?”

Her boyfriend just nods, opening his eyes to look up at her with a small smile. “Feels good. Cold.” He explains. She smiles back at him, taking the cup of water from his hands so he can lay back down. She continues to wipe his brow with the towel and doesn’t stop until a snore leaves his mouth. MJ can’t help the giggle that bubbles up, but to be fair she’s never heard Peter snore before and right now he was quite a sight to see. His hair was sticking up at all angles, even in his reclined position, his nose nearing a shade of bright red, and his mouth open just wide enough that the tiny snores were heard.

She couldn’t help but snap a quick picture to send to Tony.

MJ:

your favorite little mentee won’t be in today…Spidey caught the sniffles : /

Old Man Stark:

Wow he looks rough, you have your internship today?

MJ:

yep first day

dont wanna leave him like this tho

Old Man Stark:

Don’t stress, this is a big day for you. I have meetings all day but Pep would be more than happy to stop by and make sure all is well.

Morgan too

She’s in her “wanting to be a doctor” phase

MJ:

you trying to say she cant be a doctor, stark?

Old Man Stark:

Good lord of course not

The kid is smarter than me and she’s barely 11

I’m just saying wasn’t there a point in your life when you wanted to be a doctor too?

MJ:

yeah of course

Old Man Stark:

And you’re now getting a degree in…?

MJ:

journalism

Old Man Stark:

so…

MJ:

i could be a doctor if i wanted to

Old Man Stark:

I know

And thats why you terrify me

MJ:

>:-)

Old Man Stark:

Go to work!

Let us take care of Peter and we’ll keep you updated as you break into the great big world of being a working adult.

MJ:

:P thanks T-Star

Old Man Stark:

Don’t call me T-Star.

Michelle pockets her phone and grabs her computer bag that’s packed and ready in the living room. Quickly she takes out a stray piece of paper and jots down a quick note for her boy just incase he wakes up alone.

Petey,

Had to get to the office (wish me luck lol) but Pepper and Morgan should be by soon. Please don’t die while I’m gone. I’ll be pissed if you do that. Wash your hands, blow your nose, and don’t leave used tissues on the bed that’s gross. Love you. Feel better.

-M

Satisfied, she leaves the note under the tissue box, gives him one last kiss on the forehead, and makes her way out the door. But not before sending Morgan that goofy picture of Peter.

MJ:

here

use this as blackmail

tell him you’ll post it on insta next time he says he won’t take you to mcdonalds

Mo Mo Stark:

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Peter wakes to his front door closing and whispering coming from the living room. He panics for a moment before realizing that the voices belonged to Pepper and Morgan. As the fan blows above him, he hears a piece of paper flutter next to him. With a shaky hand he grabs it and reads over the note that MJ had left for him. He cant help but blush, just at the thought of his girlfriend. He wonders how her first day is going. He misses her a lot. Then he realizes his fever must of gone up, as he definitely wasn’t this emotionally fragile when he had gone to sleep.

With a yawn, he sits up and swings his legs over the side of the bed and grabs the quilt at the end and wraps it around his around his shoulders. With a huff he slides off the bed and makes his way to the living room. He finds Pepper setting grocery bags down on the kitchen island and Morgan already situated in front of the TV, some YouTube vlog video playing over the speakers.

“Morgan Hope, turn that down before you wake your broth-“ Pepper stops when she notices Peter standing in the doorway. “Oh, afternoon sweetheart! Did Morgan wake you? I’m so sorry I told her to quiet down-“

“Pep, it’s okay, I actually woke up whend you guys walked ind.” He rasps, congestion still heavy in his horse voice.

“Oh honey you sound awful, come on now, on the couch. You shouldn’t be up.” Pepper says, guiding him with a hand on his back to the couch. Morgan scoots a bit to make room for her big brother.

“Hi, Dr. Mborgand, you brindg any of the good drugs today?” Peter jokes, making the girl roll her eyes.

“Mom, Peter says he on drugs. He needs to detox stat. Get me an IV with glutathione, vitamin C, and vitamin B.” The youngest Stark states.

Her mother sighs as she returns to the kitchen. “Alright, that’s enough Discovery Life for you. Why can’t you just watch Disney Channel like a normal eleven year old.” Pepper mumbles as she starts taking items out of the grocery bags.

Peter and Morgan just giggle, which leads to a coughing fit from Peter. Morgan’s tiny hand pats his back as he hacks into his elbow, he murmurs an apology as the coughs taper off.

“You need to lay down Petey, and you need tissues.” Morgan articulates as she stands and looks around the apartment.

Clearing his throat, Peter points to the bedroom. “There should be sombe tissues by mby bed…if you could grab those that’d be ndice.”

Morgan nods confidently and makes her way to the bedroom. Seconds later she reemerges with the tissue box in hand and places them in the crook of Peter’s arm.

“Thangk you doctor.” Peter smiles, causing Morgan to smile in return.

“You’re welcome!” The girl returns to her spot on the couch and presses play on the video she was watching. It was vlog about makeup, Peter assumed, as the YouTuber was covered in a very impressive, glossy, look and was showing off makeup pallettes. Peter watches as the video cuts and suddenly the makeup artist is bare faced and begins to work on the look they had previewed in the intro.

Pepper chuckles as she approaches the couch, mug of hot tea with lemon and honey in hand. She hands the cup to Peter, who is drowsily watching the makeup being applied. “You don’t have to watch this you know.” Pepper whispers to him. “This is your apartment and you’re sick, turn on whatever you want.”

Taking a sip of the tea, humming as it soothes his sore-ish throat, Peter shakes his head. “Ndo, this is awesombe, look at how precise he is with the brush. Oh, thangks for the tea…also.” Pepper chuckles more, kissing the boy on the top of the head, and leaving him with Morgan to watch some internet celebrity do a perfect line with their liquid eyeliner.

Pepper had called May in the morning after hearing from Tony that Peter wasn't feeling well, knowing the boys aunt would have all the inside knowledge on how to care for a sick Peter. It wasn’t as if Pepper had never seen Peter sick, though. Since Tony had introduced them to each other way back before Morgan was even a thought, Peter had spent some sick days in the tower, the compound, and even one or two in the lake house. Yes, Pepper had seen a sick Peter Parker in her lifetime, however this was the first time she was his sole caretaker. However, after the quick call to the boy’s aunt, Pepper had a pretty good idea of how to care for the sick Spiderling.

“Oh for a cold?” May had responded. “Simple, grilled cheese and tomato soup for every meal, he’ll probably want to watch Parks and Rec all day, oh and he has Tony’s old MIT hoodie in his closet and he always wears it when he’s not feeling well.”

Pepper smiled at that. When Peter decided to stay in New York for college, for family and spider-y reasons, it was no secret that Tony had been a little disappointed. No, Tony hadn’t done anything special to get Peter into MIT, honestly because he didn’t have too. Peter’s grades and test scores were good enough on their own, but he still would have loved to have seen the kid at his alma mater. When Peter had told him of his college decision, scared out of his mind might he add, Tony just hugged and told him he was proud of him. Tony reassured the kid that where ever he went to school was fine by him and that he’d support him the whole way through. “I am going to need that MIT sweatshirt back” Tony had joked, waiting to be met by a “shut up Tony” or an eye roll, but instead he was met with tears— big fat ones that welled up in Peter’s eyes. Tony was quick to see he had messed up and it took about twenty minutes to reassure the boy that he didn't want the sweatshirt back and that “of course I still love you Peter”. Since then Peter has kept the garment close to him at all times, just incase Tony ever thought about taking it.

Pepper goes to Peter’s closet, instantly spotting the faded maroon hoodie and taking it off of the hanger. Both he and Morgan are still mesmerized by the YouTube video, but they glance up when Pepper walks over again. Peter’s eyes light up at the sight of the hoodie in her hands. He’s close to making grabby hands for it but she hands it to him first. He puts it on and settles back down onto the couch. “Thangk you Pep.”

“Keep it safe, can’t have Tony snatching it.” She jabs as she walks back to the kitchen to start the grilled cheese.

Peter, though thoroughly invested in the new makeup video Morgan put on, can’t help but doze off as the ambient sounds of his apartment lull him to sleep. He hears a shuffling on the couch next to him and opens one of his eyes, seeing Morgan giggling at him. “Can I braid your hair Petey?” She whispers. In true college kid fashion, Peter had let his hair grow out a little bit, and while it wasn’t long enough to braid it all together, Morgan liked to do tiny braids with tufts of his hair for fun.

Turning onto his side away from Morgan, giving her better access to his hair, Peter chuckles at his little sister. “Go for it Mborgie, mbake mbe beautiful.”

With a squeal of delight, the eleven year old Stark pulls tiny hair-ties out of her pocket and gets to work. Peter, who had always loved having his hair played with, lets the braiding put him right to sleep after only a few tiny braids were done.

If Morgan laughed at the snores that came from Peter moments later, she didn't tell him. He did let her braid half his head, anyway.

The rest of the day passes in a sleepy haze for Peter. He remembers waking up a few moments after falling asleep on the couch. Pepper helping him sit up and setting a tray of his favorite sick day meal in his lap. He had to hand it to Pepper, she made a mean grilled cheese soup combo. He finishes the sandwich and about half of the soup before he feels his eyes grow heavy again and the tray is taken from his lap.

“Go back to sleep, hon. Morgan and I are here if you need us.” Pepper reassures the boy, so Peter does.

The next time he wakes was when Morgan and Pepper we’re on their way out. He vaguely remembers sluggishly thanking them for staying with him and Pepper saying something about MJ being home in just a few minutes, but as soon as the apartment door closes Peter was out once more.

The final time he wakes up is to Michelle gently shaking his shoulder, attempting to wake him from his short slumber. His eyes open, but quickly close again as he stretches his whole body, somehow exhausted and sore from his long day of sleeping.

“Emmby, you back?” He asks, not yet opening his eyes again.

He hears her adorable laugh and his heart soars. “Yes, dork, it’s me. Wanna open those pretty eyes for me, Tiger?”

Obviously wanting to see his beautiful girlfriend, he opens his eyes again. MJ looks tired from her first day but extremely happy.

“Was it ambazing? Everythindg you could have hoped for?” He asks, nuzzling closer to her thigh, much like a cat.

She hums an affirmation, bringing her hand up to trace random shapes along his arm. “It was everything and more. Honestly I can see myself working there forever. It was…it was perfect.”

Peter smiles at that. MJ deserved the perfect job and more. “Babe, that fandtastic. I’m so happy for you.” He says horsely but sincerely. He moves closer to her, raising his head a bit to lay it on her lap. With the motion, one of Morgan’s many little braids in his hair make themselves apparent and Michelle can help but burst with laughter.

It causes Peter to jolt up in a sleepy state of panic. “What, what happended?” He asks sitting up slightly, eyes half closed but alert.

She reaches up to ruffle the tiny braids that cover the right side of his head. “What is this? Did Morgan just learn how to fishtail braid because these are honestly kinda good.” She inspects the braids as Peter’s cheeks blush.

He smiles, coughing slightly and gently shaking his head so the braids flop around. That gets another laugh from MJ. “Mby sisters pretty talendted, huh?”

MJ nods, very amused. “An interesting look…but I’ll give it points for creativity.”

As the couple laughs again, Peter brings two fingers up to massage his temple as he feels a dull ache in his head.

“Headache?” Michelle frowns.

“Mhmm,” Peter confirms. “I thingk Mborgan made the braids a little too tight.”

“That’s no good.” MJ sympathizes, lowering her boy’s head back down onto her lap, braid side up so she can work on undoing the little knots. She makes quick work of it and within minutes, Peter’s hair is braid-less and the throbbing in head head dies down. In thanks, Peter snuggles his face closer Michelle’s middle, wrapping his arms around it as well.

“You thingk you can use a vacationd day tomborrow? I mbissed you today.” Peter whines, partly joking but sorta kinda being serious.

“From what I heard, your eyes were open for about thirty minutes today. Too busy sleeping to miss me that much.” MJ giggles at the sniffly boy with his head in her lap. He just shrugs in response, and she can feel his body relaxing and congested breaths evening out. “You going back to sleep on me already, Parker? Not even gonna let me tell you about my day?” She jokes again.

Peter snorts involuntarily as he turns his head to look up at her, eyes glossed with fever and sleepy but apologetic. “I’mb up I’mb up, tell mbe everything.”

She grabs the sides of his face sweetly, slightly squishing his cheeks while she kisses his forehead and then his nose. “I’m kidding, Peter. God your brain must be frying, come on let's go to bed.” She pats his cheek lightly and helps him sit up.

He yawns with his whole body, his hands stretching into the air and his back arching. “But it’s only like six, arend’t you hungry for dinnder?” He coughs into his fists while Michelle takes his other hand, helping him lift off the couch.

“Let me rephrase. You’re going to shower, put new pajamas on, and get in bed while I make us grilled cheeses, your second one today I'm assuming. How does that sound?” MJ asks, leading him to their bathroom.

Peter clears his throat as he sits on the closed toilet. “And…umb…and the tombato soup?”

The shower roars to life as MJ turns the handle. “You think I’d forget the most important part?” She scoffs, feigning hurt. Peter just smiled, the dopey smile he gets when he thinks about how in love he is with this girl. With two more quick forehead kisses she leaves him to shower.

Peter exits the shower feeling refreshed, less stuffy, and hungry once more. Thanks to the shower stream he can faintly smell the toasty cheesy smell from the kitchen and it gives him a nostalgic feeling.

As he grabs pajama pants and the MIT hoodie, Peter thinks of the first time he got sick after going to live with Ben and May. It was the first day of what was considered flu season and the sickly kid had contracted the virus at the drop of a hat. He was miserable the whole day, crying and wallowing in the aches and pains of the illness. The biggest issue, however, was that he refused to eat anything, that is until Ben decided to make himself a grilled cheese for dinner.

The older Parker noticed Peter looking the sandwich with feverish eyes. “Look tasty, bud?” Ben questioned, raising an eyebrow. Little Peter just nodded and Ben smiled, extremely relieved that his nephew was finally going to eat.

Sticking his pointer and middle finger in his mouth, Peter watches as his uncle stands from the couch and starts on another sandwich. “Uncle Ben?” Peter asks in a small voice. Ben looks back over to the kid and nods. “Do you have any of the-the red soup? Mommy always made grilled cheese with red soup.” Peter nearly whispered.

Ben thinks for a minute, not completely sure what the boy meant by red soup, but then it clicks. “Oh! Tomato soup?” He smiles as Peter nods. Ben open the cupboard to him and pulls out a can of tomato soup, flipping it in the air once to see Peter smile. “Tomato soup and grilled cheese coming right up monsieur Parker.” Ben says in a horrible French accent which makes the six year old giggle, as sound that was music to Ben’s ears after all tears. From then on, Peter would only insist on eating that particular meal anytime he had so much as a headache.

The door creaking open as MJ pushes it with her hip brings Peter out of his thoughts. She has the tray of grilled cheeses and soups in her hands and an amused look on her face. “You okay? Need help with something?”

Peter blinks and remembers that he’s sitting in the edge of their bed, in a towel, pajamas in hand. “Oh…no I’mb okay. Just thinking ‘bout stuff.”

MJ sets the tray down on her bedside table. “You already sound less stuffy. Maybe you should sleep in the shower.” She quips, not missing Peter's sweet tiny giggle as she grabs the water tank from the humidifier and takes it to the bathroom with her.

Peter gets dressed and settles into bed. He notices that Pepper has changed the sheets and his heart clinches, nearly overwhelmed by the love he feels from his family. He takes out his phone to text her a thank you but is intercepted by a string of texts from Tony.

Tony Stank:

Morgs is showing me pictures of the wonderful makeover she gave you

Honestly thought you pulled it off really well

…but you need a haircut

Please kiddo let me get you in with my hair guy

You’ll love him

Spider-Tot:

sorry pops but I am fully committing to this college hair thing

mj says she wants me in a man bun by graduation so

cant let my girl down

Tony Stank:

I swear you two are conspiring against me

Oh well

How you feeling bud?

Spider-Tot:

still kinda gross

snotty

but i think my fevers kinda lower

so thats something

tell pep thank you so so much for today

i was barely awake when they left

i feel bad I didn't get to say anything

Tony Stank:

I gotcha Pete don’t worry

If you need more company tomorrow let me know I’m free all day

Spider-Tot:

wdym ill just come in to the lab tomorrow

Tony Stank:

That’s a negative Petey Pie

As your gracious boss i’m giving you the next three days off

I want all this crap out of your system before you’re back in the lab

Spider-Tot:

three days ??

boooo

u stink old man

Tony Stank:

Good lord

You’re the only person I know that complains about getting days off from work

Get a good nights sleep and maybe ill bring you a circuit board to mess with tomorrow

Good enough?

Spider-Tot:

hmmm

fine

Tony Stank:

Good

Now go rest

Don’t bother your girlfriend too much

She complains to me when you do

Spider-Tot:

now I think its you two conspiring against me

:P

night tony

love u

Tony Stank:

Love you too bambino

Michelle returns from the bathroom, makeup off, hair down, and humidifier tank full of water. She sets the tank back in and turns the machine on, steam filling the air. After quickly putting on her own set of pajamas, MJ takes her and Peter’s dinner from the side table and places it on the bed between them. Peter wastes no time digging in, groaning in admiration for the food. He mumbles a thanks with his mouth full and MJ laughs, wiping a bit of soup off of his lip with her thumb.

“You’re welcome, loser.” She teases, beginning to eat her own meal. After a few bites she take the TV remote by her side and flips on Peter’s favorite sick day show.

As the Parks and Recreation theme song begins to play, Peter looks up at his girlfriend with appreciative eyes. “You’re too good to mbe.”

“You remember that next time I make you vacuum and you get pissy about it.” Michelle deadpans, but Peter knew she was messing around.

“I’m not messing around.” She clarifies, turning to look at his with one eyebrow raised.

“You really are a mbind reader.” Peter whispers with feverish wonder.

Throwing a paper towel at him playfully, MJ laughs and Peter joins her. They finish their food as the TV continues to play in the background, Peter yawning and coughing quietly as soon as he swallows his last bite. Without a word, MJ takes the empty plates and tray back to the kitchen. She turns off the bedroom lights as she reenters and tucks herself back under the covers. It's barely after 7 p.m. and the sun it only just starting to set, making the room glow a with dark blues and purples.

Peter is cuddled into her side as soon as she's back in bed, head resting on her chest and arm around her waist. “What am I gonna do with you Peter Parker?” She sighs, twirling her fingers through his already messy hair.

“Love mbe, no matter what? Even if I’mb yucky like this?” He pulls out the puppy dog eyes for this one. MJ may be stoic on the outside but not even she can resist the sweet sparkling glare.

“If I must.” She agrees, holding him tighter and resting her head on top of his.

But she’s happy to do it. Loving Peter Parker is an extremely easy thing, MJ thinks.

[smalltownbeans]

Lights, Camera, Action | Joey, Buck, Taylor Kelly

@evan-buckley118​

When Buck had asked Joey to come to the station with him that day, she hadn't realised that there were going to be reporters - or, more specifically, one reporter and her camera man. The look written all over Buck's face when he spotted said reporter made Joey think that maybe, just maybe, he hadn't known either, but something about his expression in general didn't settle right with her. He'd never been camera shy, always stepping up for interviews with those bright smiles she adored seeing so much, so something about the situation was immediately off for her.

Not to mention, Buck seemed to take them the long-way round to the locker room, avoiding the pair completely. Most of the team were there already, just Eddie left behind pulling on his shirt so she opted for following Buck in this time, perching down on one of the benches while he changed into his uniform.

"That's Taylor Kelly, right? Off of uh... Whatsit..." Joey started, hand making general motions as her brain searched for the answer.

"Skywitness News Eight." Eddie interjected, giving Buck a look that Joey caught at the last second. It was all quirked eyebrows and expectant eyes and... Joey was definitely missing something here, wasn't she? Like the punchline of a joke she hadn't heard properly. Then again, it wouldn't be the first time that something like this had been all in her head...

"Right, of course. She does the traffic, doesn't she?"

"Yeah, and a bit of reporting last I checked," Buck answered, giving Joey a shrug once he'd tugged his pants on. After leaning to press a kiss to the top of her head, he pulled his t-shirt up and off and for good few seconds, Joey was blissfully distracted, "She did a report on the firehouse one time, maybe she's just back for a follow-up.”

Joey nodded slowly, tearing her eyes away and looking out through the glass wall in Taylor’s direction, lips twitching into a bit of a frown when she caught her looking back, though it wasn't at Joey - it was at the boys, an almost predatory smirk on her lips. Specifically, she was looking at Buck who was still very much shirtless, distracted in his task while Eddie tried to change the subject and rattled off something about Christopher's latest school project.

The unease in Joey's chest grew just a little, but... no. She wasn't that girl. She was better than that. Better than the green-eyed monster that had no business showing up yet. Eddie excused himself a few moments later with a clapped hand on Buck's back and a squeeze to Joey's shoulder, jogging up to the kitchen area.

"I don't remember that report..." Joey exhaled, looking up at Buck who was just buttoning up his uniform shirt now, feet in unlaced boots as he shuffled over to her and plopped down on the bench beside her. "Was it while we-"

"We'd broken up," He confirmed, to which Joey nodded slowly. Noa had kept her away from the TV a lot during those months, she knew that, particularly when it came to the news. He must've stopped her seeing it... Joey sighed, sparing one more glance over to Taylor, just in time to catch her making a beeline for them. 

"Incoming."

"Firefighter Buckley, long time no see."

Oh yeah, Joey hated this woman's voice already. It was sickly sweet, smug almost. She'd never be able to listen to the damn traffic report again. Buck stood up beside Joey, thankfully fully dressed now though his laces still needed to be tied.

"Taylor. Good to see you, uh.. What-What're you doing here?"

"Just a follow up report. You know, the 118, how are they getting on. I thought it could be good to see how you guys were doing. A lot's happened." That's when Taylors eyes fell to Joey, her eyebrow quirked, "And who's this? New recruit?"

She felt Buck's eyes on her now and... was that a moment of hesitation from him? She couldn't be sure.

"Uh, no, no. This is Joey. My girlfriend. She hangs around the firehouse some days for moral support." And okay, the hand resting on the back of her head as he said that did wonders for settling her nerves.

That was, until she caught a glint of something in Taylor's eye as she looked away from Joey and back up at Buck, "Oh your girlfriend... Is the Evan Buckley finally getting serious with a girl, or is it still too soon to tell?"

And there was one of Buck's nervous laughs and Joey decided then and there that she didn't want to be part of this conversation anymore, at risk of going literally green. "I should head up and see if Bobby needs help with the breakfast," She cut in, rising to her feet as she spoke. And dammit, why was she the shortest in the room, what kind of cruel trick of fate was that? "I'll see you up there?"

Buck gave her a hum and a smile, a kiss to the side of her head taking the edge off of her nerves all over again. It didn't last long though, because that edge was right back within a few moments, scratching at her insides as she said a quick goodbye to Taylor and her cameraman - though, the cameraman seemed to be the only one listening - and headed up to the kitchen.

"No Buck?" Eddie asked as she made it upstairs, quirking a brow from where he stood by the table.

"Still in the locker room." Joey cleared her throat, looking up at him with the most convincing smile she could muster, "The reporter... grabbed his attention." She exhaled, to which Eddie gave a feint nod and pursed his lips, hands settling on his hips. Well, that wasn't comforting.

"Do you guys need any help? I don't know how long he'll be..."

And that was how Joey ended up with Bobby beside her at the kitchen, teaching her how to make the perfect omelettes with Hen sitting opposite flicking through a book. Buck still hadn't come up, and every second unsettled her just a little more.

"Careful with the salt, you don't want too much..." Bobby warned her as she went to shake it out without even looking. She exhaled, shaking her head at herself and giving him a sheepish smile.

"Sorry, distracted."

"He'll be up in a minute. Taylor Kelly can be... persistent with her interviews."

Joey nodded slowly, her smile faltering a little. "What's... Is there history there? They seemed pretty friendly..." When Hen looked up at her, breaking from the book, Joey knew she'd hit the nail on the head. Great. "And before either of you ask, no, he hasn't told me anything. I didn't even know they'd met until today."

"It's really not our place..." Bobby started, but Hen cut in, giving Joey a reassuring smile. Thank god Hen understood her habit of overthinking after so long.

"They had a fling. It was nothing, barely two dates from what I hear. She disappeared as quickly as she'd appeared."

"So they were together?"

"If you can consider sex as-"

Hen cut off the second they all heard boots on the stairs, clambered steps that Joey knew instantly were Buck's.

"Sorry that took so long..." Buck exhaled, arms immediately going around Joey's waist when he got to her, hunched over to set his chin on her shoulder. It wasn't the first time he'd done something like this at work, but something about this hold seemed almost apologetic, and Joey wasn't sure how that made her feel, "She was asking about the accident."

And now his clinginess made sense.

Joey smiled softly, turning her head slightly to peck his cheek. "What do you wanna eat? Bobby's making omelettes but I’m sure we can whip up something vegan-friendly."

That alone seemed to settle Buck, who just grinned, already tugging her over to try and find something in the fridge. Joey chose not to bring Taylor up.

***

The next time Joey saw Taylor Kelly talking to Buck was about half an hour later, once the reporter had done her rounds downstairs and headed up with the camera in tow. Thankfully, the whole team were there, giving little comments and answers to her questions about the year, about the natural disasters, about how they'd gotten through being a firefighter down. She could see Buck was uncomfortable in his seat even from where she'd settled just out of the camera line. She didn't fancy her face being plastered all over the news... probably some obscure headline about how she'd tamed Evan Buckley or lit a fire in the firefighter.

Not that she didn't want the whole world to know that, by some miracle, he'd chosen her to love, but simply because she didn't want Taylor freaking Kelly to be the one to announce it.

In that moment, though, his discomfort was far outweighing her own, and so she'd stood, moving over to Buck and smiling as she settled a hand on his shoulder, making the excuse of reaching over for a bottle of water from the middle of the table.

"If it's quiet, do you wanna get lunch, later? We can pick up pizza from the place down the road..." She offered softly, trying to keep it audible for him if no one else. His arm around her waist and squeeze of her hip was enough confirmation, drawing a smile to her lips again. He seemed to settle after that, at least for the minutes that followed until the alarm went off and he was up and running, a carrot still clutched between his teeth.

*** Joey was sure that Taylor had gone with them - why wouldn't she? But apparently, a medical call of a woman *and* her son choking on pancakes at her home wasn't enough of a thrill. Joey didn't realise she was there until she had a camera in her face while she was trying to get on with a bit of work.

"Joey, right?"

She looked up straight at the camera, then to Taylor, then back again.

"I... I'm sorry, I don't feel comfortable being part of this report," She tried to offer as politely as she could, even giving Taylor a smile, "I'm just here for moral support."

"But you're a part of Buck's life, right? From what I hear, a big part. He wouldn't shut up about you."

He wouldn't? The hint of a smile tugged at the corner of her lips, but the look on the other woman's face made it disappear quickly. The whole morning, Joey had been sure that her distaste for Taylor Kelly had been purely because of how she acted around Buck but now, looking at the condescending look in her eye, Joey knew, right then and there, that she would've hated her anyway.

"You heard right." She said simply, trying to look back at her laptop, hoping it would deter her from asking any more questions. Wasn't that a rookie error.

"How long have you two been together? It can't have been more than a year. Unless Mr Buckley isn't quite as kind hearted as he seems."

Okay now that had her blood boiling.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Joey found the words tumbling out of her lips before she could stop and think, her eyebrows knotted in a mix of confusion and disbelief.

"Well, from what I hear, he was still sleeping around not that long ago."

"It's none of your business," She snapped, looking straight up at her, even closing her laptop in the process, "It stopped being your business when you stopped seeing eachother. And for the record, Buck is as kind hearted as they come and if you had a shred of decency in your whole body, you'd know that. We were together before, took a break, and we're together now. So yes, it's been more than a year."

"Oh, you're her," Taylor responded, dragging out the second word with a smirk at the corner of her lips, "You're the girl that broke his heart, right? Left him all broken and-"

"I think that's enough, Taylor. You have permission to film us, not our guests."

Joey hadn't noticed Bobby coming upstairs until she heard his voice, commanding just like the captain she knew him to be. Taylor didn't seem immediately bothered by it, giving Joey a look that she wanted to wipe right off of her smug face with a slap, but she kept her hands clenched down around her laptop instead, knuckles almost white from the effort.

"Shame. It would've been quite the story." She sighed, standing to leave. It wasn't until Taylor had gone downstairs, cameraman in tow, the Bobby sat himself down next to a still tense Joey.

"I can assure you, she had this effect on a lot of people. She's too much about the story, not enough about the people behind it."

"How did he... How did Buck ever..." How did Buck, a kindhearted, too-much-love-to-give, treasure of a man go for Taylor Kelly of all people. It probably had a lot to do with the long legs and red hair and perfect body, but...

"She's convincing. When she wants to be."

Joey sighed, giving a feint nod again, looking up as she heard the firetruck start reversing back into the station.

"I just wish she'd be convincing somewhere else."

Bobby settled a hand over one of hers, giving a little pat before pushing himself to stand. "I dont think you have anything to worry about. He's never looked at anyone like he looks at you. Plus, I hear he learned pretty quickly that she wasnt what he wanted."

Joey looked up at Bobby after that, searching his features for any sign that he was lying, her shoulders and grip finally relaxing when she realised he was being honest. He was always honest... she wasn't sure why she'd even questioned it.

"Thank you..." Came her soft response, which was met with a smile before Bobby excused himself to go and meet the team. She could feintly hear them all scuffling around putting away equipment, and before she could think it through she was standing, wandering slowly over to the barrier. A mistake, because from there, she could see that Taylor had already cornered Buck.

From where she stood, Joey could see his bright, warm, heart-aching smiles that she adored. Smiles that she was usually at the recieving end of. His shoulders shook when he laughed at something Taylor had said, his thumb flicking over his birthmark as he seemed to shrug off a comment she made. He had one hand settled in his pocket, the other dropping from his eyebrow to splay over his stomach all while he rocked on his feet.

Joey didn't like to think of herself as a crazily jealous person, but surely she got a free pass this time, right?

This was a normal situation to be jealous about... right? Should she go down there? Stake her claim with growling and snarls like a feral part of her wanted to? Maybe she could just pull him into a kiss that stole both of their breaths, audience be damned. Yet, with every potential idea that flew through her head as she watched them talk, her feet never moved.

"Go save him," Eddie's voice eventually broke her from her thoughts, his shoulder bumping into hers as she looked up at her boyfriend's best friend. "Trust me, he'll appreciate it."

"He looks like he's handling it perfectly fine."

"He's on camera, he's good at pretending. Go on, go get him."

Inhaling a breath, Joey turned her head back, looking at the way Buck's eyes were now cast down even as he smiled, his hand patting at his leg with his shoulders tensed up. Maybe Eddie was right...

"God, I'm never gonna live this down..." Joey grumbled, huffing out a breath as she put one foot in front of the other and started walking down to meet him.

She kept her eyes on the steps, determined not to fall or slip or trip or something equally as embarrassing. It was because of that that she hadn't realised he'd spotted her already, or that he'd cut Taylor off mid-sentence to meet her at the bottom. Not until he was right there, holding a hand out to help her down the last few steps.

At the hand in her line of vision, Joey looked up, lips twitching into a relieved smile as she took his hand almost on instinct though stayed a couple of steps up to give herself a bit of height. "Eddie said you needed saving," She said softly, trying to keep it inaudible from the reporter but she wasn't sure she'd be overly bothered if Taylor had heard her.

"I don't know about that, but I'll totally pretend if you're the one saving me," Buck countered with a smirk, hands moving to her waist to lift her up and down the last steps instead, "Did you still want that lunch? I'm starving."

With a giggle at the lift, hands resting on his upper arms even after her feet were back on solid ground, Joey was nodding and running one hand down to take his hand. "Hell, yes. You can tell me all about the call."

"Firefighter Buckley, can I have five minutes to finish the interview? We were getting some really... interesting footage."

"Can it wait? I've got a date."

And maybe Joey took just a little bit too much pleasure from the look on Taylor's face as she started to tug Buck out of the fire station and away from the camera.

[screamingatanemptyroom]

Superhero School Part 2

Hey guys, here is part two to the story about Tess and the superhero school. 

Part 1 linked here. 

I mapped it out and this story should finished in one or two more parts. I’ll just finish up this story before going back to regularly scheduled content since I’m on a roll.

Hope you guys enjoy!

“Congrats!” 

A smiling man shook my hand, squeezing just a little tighter than was comfortable. Fortunately the handshake didn’t last long. He handed me my certificate of acceptance, allowing me to awkwardly pull my hand back, and sent me on my way. Clutching the small paper tightly within my fist, I ran away, looking for my best friend. After searching fruitlessly for a few minutes, I spotted a familiar face within the see of anxious children.

“MIA!” I waved the paper over my head, blushing and stumbling to a stop once I realized that everyone’s eyes were on me. I’ve never liked public speaking, and I felt myself shrinking back as more and more attention came my way.

“You’re hopeless, come on!” Mia sighed, pushing her long dark hair out of her eyes with a smirk. Grabbing my hand, she pulled me out of the crowd and into an abandoned hallway to talk. Far from peering eyes, I finally calmed down and caught my breath.

“Thanks.”

“I don’t get it, you always seem fine and confident in one on one situations.” She leaned against a wall, shaking her head. “Why do you turn into a stuttering bundle of anxiousness as soon as we’re in a crowd?

“I told you I get stage fright! But that’s not important.” Again I waved the small piece of paper in the air. “THIS is!”

Taking in the paper and the grin, the smile slowly faded from Mia’s face as her expression became serious.

“You got in.” It was a quiet statement, not a question.

“I GOT IN!!!” I jumped up and down with excitement, unable to hold back a wide smile. “It’s what we’ve dreamed about for all these years, Mia! We’ll train at S.T. high, become super heroes, and help kids like us! We’ll be heroes!”

“…” An awkward pause settled between us.

“… Mia?”

She let out a long sigh. “Here.”

She handed me a similar paper to the one in my hand. Glancing over it, my eyes brightened at the words “acceptance” but my joy quickly faded as I read on.

“LP school program? I don’t understand! You can make fire with your mind!” The acceptance paper crumpled under my tight grip. “Why wouldn’t they accept you to S.T.?”

Mia shrugged, a bitter smile crossing her face. “They said the ‘power output’ was too low.” Her hand rose to eye level, a tiny flame blooming at her fingertip. “Not ‘S.T. material.’”

“That’s stupid!”

“Stupid or not, that’s their decision.” The flame went out, leaving us both to stare at each other in silence for a few moments.

“So what are you going to do?”

Mia’s question surprised me, shouldn’t I be asking HER that? “What do you mean?”

“We promised to train together.” Her gaze was intense, making me want to shrink back and hide. “I can’t go to S.T. High, but you…”

“You want me to give up my spot and switch schools?!” I was stunned. “But…”

She didn’t back down. “You promised.”

“But I…” I trailed off, miserable. I had worked so hard for this chance, would I really give it up? Give up my dream of training here?

“You promised, Tess. Will you come with me? Yes. Or. No?”

“…” I hung my head, not wanting to meet her eyes.

“I thought so.” With a final glare in my direction, she turned around walking out of the school and leaving me to stand in the hallway.

Alone. 

No, not again.

I don’t want to see this again.

I wanted to run forward, to change my mind, change what happened, but it was too late, it was long in the past. I reached out a desperate hand in the direction Mia had run off but she was gone. Everything was fading. The halls, the tiled floor beneath my feet, all fading into darkness. I tried to move but I was rooted into place. I called out to her but my voice made no sound. All I could I hear was the sound of her pitiful, desperate sobs.

Mia? No, please, no!

“I just wanted to be powerful like you.” Her broken voice called out between the tears, catching my breath within my chest.

MIA! STOP! I screamed silently but there was no one left to here me.

“Tess, help me!”

MIA NO!

Flames sprung up around me, licking at my clothes. I couldn’t feel the heat, but I could hear it crackling around me. And then… I could feel the pain.

The pain of being burned alive.

“NO!”

I woke up in a cold sweat, panting for breath. I rubbed my throat, clearing it with a groan as I realized it was raw from screaming. Shaking my head to clear it, I rubbed my right arm, feeling the bumpy surface of the skin where the skin grafts had healed in. I could still feel the pain from my dream, lingering on the long since healed flesh. 

“Mia.” Slapping a hand over my eyes, which burned with unshed tears, I whispered her name once into the empty room, before burying the grief deep inside.

“TESS!” A shouting voice caught my attention as my dorm room door swung open, revealing the red headed boy with a wide grin. He ran through the doorway, coming to an ungainly stop right before my bed, blinking with a confused expression at the sight of me still resting there.

“Why are you still sleeping?!” He waved his arms. “It’s breakfast time!”

I groaned. “Look, Liam, it’s…” I looked at the clock at my bedside. “SIX AM on a Saturday?!!!! Plus, who ever told you to barge into a girl’s room without knocking!”

Liam stared at me, obviously lost.

“What if you had walked in on me and I was… less than presentable for company?”

“Presentable? What, were you…” He looked around, and then continued in a hoarse whisper “Solving calculus problems?”

“What? No! Why would that even…” I sighed. “I don’t understand how your mind works.”

“Funny, my mom says that all the time!” He grinned, pulling out a candy bar from his pocket, unwrapping it, and biting into it with relish.

“…” I got out of bed with a shrug, and dug around for some comfortable clothes to wear. Holding them in my arms, I cleared my throat, pointing towards the door. Liam didn’t notice at first, all of his attention was still on the quickly disappearing candy bar.

“LIAM.” I reached out and pushed him towards the door.

He yelped with surprise as he was forced out of the room. “What?”

“Get out until I’ve changed.”

“Then can we eat breakfast?” He asked hopefully. “I’m starving!”

“You just ate a candy bar.”

“That was forever ago!”

“You ARE LITERALLY STILL HOLDING THE WRAPPER…” I took a deep breath, steadying myself. “Just wait here.”

“But…”

“WAIT. HERE.”

I slammed the door shut, sighing to myself. “So frustrating!”

“My Mom says that too!” Came the muffled reply through the door.

Ignoring him, I walked away, preparing for the day ahead.

 “So what’s the plan?” After breakfast, during which I noticed an uncomfortable amount of food had been stuffed into Liam’s pocket space, we headed out into the main building of the school.

“Can you take me to the room of that guy you told me about?” I paused, trying not to watch as he forcefully tried to force an apple that couldn’t completely fit into his dimensional pocket.

“Which one?”

“You know, Cameron? The swirly guy? The last one that disappeared?”

Liam gave up on trying to fit the apple into his space, taking a bite out of his with a rueful grin. “Sure I can, but why do you want to go there?”

“I want to investigate the disappearances of the missing kids. “

I was ready with countless different explanations if he asked for more information. After all, it wasn’t like I could tell him the truth about how I came to attend his school and who I really was. I felt myself tense up, ready for a barrage of questions.

“Really? Like a detective?!” He pumped a fist into the air, and then dug around his pocket, pulling out a pipe and a magnifying glass. “My moment has arrived!”

“Your… moment?”

“Years of waiting for a chance to solve a mystery, and now the time has finally come!” Liam held the magnifying glass up to his eye, making it appear comically large as he looked at me through it.

“…Sure.” Holding back another of many sighs, I gestured down the hallway. “Lead the way.”

  Cameron’s room was strangely clean. His belongings still were there, posters, books, even a small sketchpad full of superhero costume designs sat neatly in the corner. Everything was tidied up carefully, as if the occupant was preparing to be gone for a long time. I stood in the center of the room, looking around.

“There doesn’t seem to be any signs of struggle.”

Liam nodded, studying a poster on the wall with his magnifying glass, a serious expression on his face.

“Find anything?”

“Yeah, Cameron had awful taste in music.” He gestured to the band poster, shuddering. “No wonder we weren’t friends.”

I shook my head. “Nevermind.”

As I wandered around, however, I noticed something strange.

“Liam, do you smell that?”

“I swear it wasn’t me!”

“No, it’s a sickly sweet smell… I can’t quite place it.” I took a deep breath in through my nose, trying to concentrate.

“Yeah, I guess I smell it too… Do you really think it’s important?”

“Anything could be important.” Digging through his desk, at first I didn’t find anything, but after reducing the friction under it and sliding it back from the wall, I found a planner which had been hidden underneath.

 “Bingo.”  Glancing through it, I whistled, impressed. “Wow this guy is organized. Meetings, classes… he even kept track of which kids he gave swirlies to and when!”

“Ah, yes.” Liam nodded. “My time was Tuesdays at 2:30 PM. “

“Well, let’s take this with us, it could be useful…” I paused, hearing the sound of nearing footsteps. “Quick, hide this!” I shoved the planner in his hands.

“WHERE?”

“Where do you think?!!!”

“Oh.” He tried to put it in his pocket, realizing he didn’t have enough room. Six candy bars and a banana came out and were placed on the desk.

“Why… oh nevermind, just hurry.”

“I’m trying!” He shoved the planner into his pocket, giving out a relieved sigh as it easily slid in. “Got it!”

As he said that, the door to the room burst open and the boy with the eyepatch walked in.

Seriously does anyone knock at this school?

“John, what are you doing here?” Liam asked with a surprised expression.

John grinned, leaning against the doorway with his arms folded. “That’s not the right question, pocket boy. The real question is: why are you and Dropout here doing in Cameron’s room? Breaking and entering isn’t looked well upon, you know.”

“We didn’t break in, the door was open.”

I smiled awkwardly. Actually the door WAS locked… I just reduced the resistance of the mechanism until it slid out of place with a small tap. It was probably not the right time to confess, though.

Fortunately, eyepatch didn’t ask any follow up questions. “Whatever, everyone has to go to the school yard. There’s been an emergency meeting called.”

“What?” I was shocked, the principal shouldn’t have done anything to get in the way of my investigation unless it was really pressing. “Who called it?”

The boy’s grin turned cruel. “Your old schoolmates. It’s the student council of ST High.”

Oh no.

“Why the long face? Think they’ve missed you?” He laughed to himself, but I ignored him, walking out of the room.

He started to extend his foot  across the door way to trip me, but I increased the air resistance of his foot, slowing it almost to a stop while I passed by, his leg hung in the air, unable to move forward.

“what the…”

With a hidden smile, I released all of the resistance around his leg at once.

BAM! It struck the doorframe with a loud noise.

“OW!”

Desperately holding back my laughter, I grabbed onto Liam and we ran towards the courtyard, leaving the furiously cursing bully behind us.

“ST High students are really here?” Liam sounded nervous and excited. “Should I go change? Does my hair look okay? Should I give them candy… Oh no, I left my candy bars behind!” He almost turned back to retrieve his abandoned stash but I pulled him forward, chuckling.

“What are you so worried about? They’re just students like you or me!”

“No they’re not!” Liam pouted as he walked. “They’re special, they’re training to be super heroes! They actually have REAL powers, not like my stupid, useless portal or your…” He trailed off with wide eyes, looking guilty.

“Like my useless power?” I smirked, holding onto his hand a little tighter. “Just hold on.”

It took precise control, increased friction behind us to push off, decreased in front of us to let us slide along with each step. Our speed went from a normal quick pace to lightning fast with just a thought.

“SLOW DOWN!”

“Too late, we’re here!” I stopped us, laughing out loud at Liam’s disheveled bright red hair which stood out in every direction.

He noticed, trying to smooth it down with a furious expression. “Great, now the S.T. council will think I’m weird.”

“…”

“Don’t give me that pitying look.”

We walked into the crowd, weaving our way towards the front, where two people stood.

“Attention students of LP high! We have come here today to help you! Be glad! You are safe now!” A young man with a proud expression stood forward, making sure that every pose he stood in while he spoke had his muscles slightly flexed to show them off. A tall, beautiful girl stood next to him silently, looking bored.

Oh great. These guys.

“I am the student council president of ST high, Eric, also know as the Steel Strength Warrior…” 

I groaned quietly, but no one noticed due to the excitement of the crowd.

“And this is my vice president, Al…”

“Don’t tell the weaklings my real name.” She interrupted with a disgusted glance towards the crowd.

“Sorry… the Flying Wonder.”

“They… they don’t seem very nice.” Liam whispered, looking disheartened. “Are all ST kids like that?”

“I’m from ST.”

“Maybe they kicked you out for being too nice?”

Eric continued talking in a loud voice. “We have been summoned to this school to investigate the missing students! Do not worry, we will find the culprit and bring him to justice before anyone else is hurt.”

Terrified murmurings broke out through the crowd. Many of them had obviously not known that students were missing, or that they were in any danger. I let out another, tired sigh.

Amateurs.

I walked away, not caring to hear anymore. Liam grabbed my sleeve, trying to stop me.

“Tess! Where are you going? The ST guys are still holding the meeting! Besides…” He hesitating, pulling on my arm slightly his grip unknowingly slid over old, scarred skin, causing pain.  “We should talk to them later, see if they have any advice on increasing our powers and get into ST high!”

No. Not again.

I shook my head, trying to stop the uneasiness that grabbed my heart at his words. . “Increasing your powers is impossible.  Put it out of your mind.”

“Easy for you to say! You have a useful power! Me? Just having a little pocket dimension to hold stuff in? How am I supposed to be a hero with that?” He waved his arms, distressed, the volume in voice growing steadily. “It’s not good enough! My mom thinks I’m training to be a super hero here! She has no idea that this is just a second rate school for the drop outs and leftovers like you and me!”

“…” 

A silence fell over the yard as everyone turned to stare at us, their attention grabbed by his yelling. I felt myself break out in a cold sweat, my heart beating frantically as I felt all their gazes on me. The pressure of so many people’s focus being on me was crushing me.

It’s too much!

I turned around and fled, using my powers to force myself to go faster than ever, and didn’t stop until I reached my room. I locked the door behind me, my back sliding against it until I was sitting on the floor, my head in my hand. I could still feel their stares, burrowing into my skin, making me feel exposed, vulnerable.

“You were clumsy.” A man in dark robes struck my face with his fist, knocking me to the ground. I tried to get back up, but received a kick to the ribs, forcing me back down. His face lowered towards my own, his eyes pitiless, his smile cruel.

“You’ll never manage to kill anyone if they see you coming.”

His fist drove towards my face once more and everything fell into darkness.

 I gasped, forcing my way out of the memory. Rubbing my eyes with shaking hands, I tried to force myself to see the room around me, not the training room they had locked me in for months. You’re free. You’re not part of them anymore. You escaped.

Yeah, you escaped, but you left someone behind didn’t you? Another corner of my brain spoke out, the words causing me to shudder.

Because it was right.

 I left her behind.

I tried to save her and I failed. 

Now, there was nothing left to save.

Standing up, I reached beneath the mattress pulling out my emergency communication device and activated it.

“Tess, what’s wrong?” The face of Mr. Lepford, the ST High principal, projected in the air above the device, looking concerned.

“What’s wrong?” I frowned at him. “Someone invited the idiot squad.”

“…” his eyes widened in shock. “The public  student council is there?”

I snapped. “Yeah, remember your brilliant idea of having a cover student council? Remember how you told me that they would only be there as a front, and to organize group activities for the school and such? Well they’re here! And they’re  mucking about in MY investigation!”

“Tess, I promise, I didn’t send them. YOU were supposed to investigate the missing students, how did they even find out about it?!”

“Well they did. And they are here. I am not happy.”

“I’m sorry, I promise I didn’t send them. How goes the investigation? Any progress?”

“I just started.” I rubbed my forehead, groaning. “I’ll send you some names as soon as I hang up, please do a general search on our surveillance system to see if there are any hits. In the meantime, there’s a few connections between the missing students. I just need to find where the points intersect and it will lead me right to them.”

“… Tess, are you going to be okay?” He leaned forward, his brow furrowed.

“Really? You think I’m going to lose in a fight….”

“No, not that.” The Principal shook his head. “You’re ten times deadlier than any teacher we have here. Why do you think I made you the student body president, the real one? But after everything you went through with them… you barely had enough pieces for us to stitch together…are you going to be okay facing them again?”

I could still hear the screaming and the roar of the flames in the back of my mind. 

“Tess?”

“I’ll be fine.” I head myself say. “Just find a reason to call the popular patrol back to SP high and get them out of my hair.”

“Will do…” he hesitated one last time. “Please be careful.”

I hung up without answering.

I needed to get back to work.

Heading to the LP high principal, Mr. Gleason’s office, I was surprised to find he was already entertaining visitors.

“Excuse me, this meeting is private.” Eric, the public student president of SP, stared at me with a condescending gaze as he clutched a floral patterned cup filled with steaming tea.

The vice president nodded, sipping for her own cup. The scent of peppermint filled the air, causing me to wrinkle my nose. I looked over at Mr. Gleason, who nervously adjusted his glasses and smiled at me. 

“Tess! Welcome! Would you like a cup of tea?”

“No. I’ve come for the documents you promised me.”

“Ah… that… I’ve already handed them over to your colleagues.” He glanced over at the two students primly perched on his office couch. “They responded to my call as well.”

“Colleague? Who are you?” The boy was obviously annoyed that we had been grouped together. Mr. Gleason looked surprised.

“How do you not know Tess? She’s the real pr…”

“I’m a real fan of your work.” I interrupted him quickly, forcing a smile and waving brightly at them.

“Tess, I don’t understand, won’t you three work togeth…”

“I work alone.” Frustrated, I turned back towards the door.

“At least stay for tea…”

I slammed the door behind me, increasing the resistance between the latch and the door. Mr. Gleason tried to turn the knob but was unable, giving me time to put some distance between us.

I should have known better than to think he could be helpful for this investigation.

At least Mr. Lepford back at ST high would be looking up some background information for me. But that didn’t mean I had time to relax. I needed the planner back from Liam. To search the other rooms. And then… I needed to anticipate the next step.

I wouldn’t let them take another student.

Not while I could stop them.

I wouldn’t fail another person.

Mia… she would be the last one.

I had to keep moving.

[theheartchoice]

 Providence 

dean/cas  |  teen  |  2k  |  canonverse s6  |  ao3 

for @profoundnet's bi-weekly Bot Stat challenge. prompt issued: July 9th 2019 

dedicated to @saltnhalo ~ crack-free! 😘

Dean is cleaning his gun. Cas is the pizzaman. Sam is on the demon blood again.

Dean doesn't miss the apple-pie life, not really. He's a Hunter and this is what they do, this is the life for him. Doesn't mean he can't do with some small comforts, now and then. Or some hope - even if it's just a clue to find a way to stop the stuff of nightmares from wreaking havoc on the world. Pizza helps, too.

So, she broke things off.

..Unclip the mag.. 

So what?

..Clear the chamber.. 

Not like Dean really expected it to last, right?

..This cloth probably needs to be thrown.. 

Guess it was nice while it lasted.

..Where's the pipe cleaner?.. 

Maybe it would've been nice to last a while longer.

..Need more oil.. 

Had a whole year, though. And it was a pretty good year, as Hunter standards go.

..Should grab some rock salt, too. Runnin' low.. 

Sure as hell wasn't perfect. Dean was no model boyfriend or parental figure. Not with all his baggage, his demons.

..Need to make a list. Probably need a bunch of stuff. Wonder if Soulless Sammy's hacked any more cards yet.. 

That life isn't the thing to miss, though. That's not the life for him. He misses them. Her smile, her strength, her warmth. Little Ben growing up so fast, Dean pained he'll miss the rest. But he's not that guy - Mr. Family Man. They deserve better.

..They can hit the store before they leave town. Baby needs fuel. Grab some Johnny to replace the backup. Get outta dodge before the rains come. Sam can find 'em a case once they hit the interstate. They need snacks for the road, too. With any luck they'll find some monster to gank by nightfall.. 

Dean's only halfway through with their arsenal when his stomach reminds him he's past due for supper. Dinner had been a bust; Soulless Sam needs a lesson in acceptable menu classics, asap. Forget beheading a vamp with a baseball bat he could've sworn wasn't on the pitch a moment earlier - Dean'll be lucky not to get salmonella poisoning from that so-called food!

The mini fridge is bare, the cooler barer - unless you count half a dozen syringes of Dead-Man's blood. Dean doesn't. But considering Sam's choice for dinner, maybe he does? Never again. Sam is off food-duty until further notice.

What Dean could really go for, right now, is some pizza. Extra Large and all to himself. There's gotta be takeout menus around here somewhere.

He's barely scuffed one boot over the worn carpet when there's a rap at the door. At midnight. Sam wouldn't knock. Soulless Sam even less likely. 

Grabbing one from the newly-cleaned stash, Dean silently draws up into the crook of wall between door and curtained window, gun cocked. Swift to pull it open and hard to throw himself against it, on the other side of that door is the last person Dean expected to see. "Cas?" Standing in a fuzzy halo of sickly yellow halogen, holding a goddamned miracle in his arms. "Is that pizza?"

"I thought you might be hungry."

"For me?" Cas nods. Dean yanks him - and the pizza - inside. "I'm starved, actually. That's some good timin'."

And so much for the brief trip into Bizarro World where a certain Angel actually respects personal space; Cas' hands are on Dean - shoulder and forehead as he tries to lean over the table, flipping the lid to inspect the toppings. Meatlovers and extra BBQ sauce. Awesome. But those hands are turning him away from pizza, now. "What's up with you?"

"You're not in any stage of starvation, Dean. You're in perfect health.. Aside from you-.. your wrist." He takes Dean's arm from bicep to sprain without hesitation. "What happened?"

It's kinda hard to shrug outta the grip of a guy who could literally throw you as far as the eye can see. "Vamp nest. But we got 'em, no biggy." No more deaths once they arrived in town, too, which was a nice change. "Can we eat? Sam bought, like, raw fish for dinner, man - I think it's still swimmin' around in there." Dean eyes the garbage where he tossed his takeout container, forcing back bile at the memory: one hasty bite before he'd realised his mistake. It had been.. slimy. 

One of Cas' hands slips from his bicep to palm over Dean's stomach. The other leaves his wrist, at least, so Dean seizes the moment and steals the nearest slice from the box; chase away a bad memory with something good. OH, yeah - screw clouds - this is heaven. 

"Nihon unagi." 

"Huh―?" Dean tries not to let the precious pizza tumble from his mouth. 

"Freshwater eel, and they're not swimming. Not consciously, anyway."

Dean's jaw stills. He stares at Cas. 

"Digestive enzymes."

Oh, of course. 

Cas' eyes refocus on Dean's pizza. No - his hand. His injury. "May I..?" 

Mid-chew, Dean figures it can't hurt. He switches his pizza from right to left and holds out the sprain he'd forgot he had. 

Cas' hand closes careful around it, a slip of warmed ice flowing quick through Dean's veins - and then his minor injury is minor no more.

"Thanks," Dean murmurs, and follows it with another mouthful of beef and pepperoni.

Cas leaves him to his second slice to survey the room. "Where is Sam?"

"Li'b'ary.." This is food. This is what every meal should taste like. All the meat, rich with smokey goodness. "R'se'rch."

"I thought you said the case was over?" Cas regains some proximity to the little round table where Dean stands with hips hugging the large pizza box. He takes a few moments to chew, swallow - rushing the savour-part, but Angels don't really understand the pleasure of a good pizza-pie, now do they?

"Not that. Purgatory." With slice #3 in hand, he realises he's got nothing to wash it down with. Slightly annoyed, he leads Cas past the bed laden with guns to the one neatly made with a duffel bag open on top. He pulls out a book, hands it over. "Officially, it's a work of fiction, and we still don't really know what we're dealin' with exactly, but.." He takes another bite. "..There may be a way to counteract the spell Crowley plans on usin'. Last line of defense, sorta thing."

Cas goes pensive and Dean goes back to his pizza, leading Cas over to their Wall of Crazy. They're still trying to track Crowley's whereabouts; It's ongoing. Vamps get beheaded on slow progress days.

"It's almost midnight."

So..? 

"The library would be closed."

Dean gawks. "You know what time libraries close in small-town America?" Cas nods, clearly not seeing the issue. Whatever. "Not a library, a church. Secret archive in the foundations. The pastor, Father Roberto, let him in, a favour for takin' care of the vamps." The fact that one of them had been a colleague of his must've hit close enough to home to warrant unlocking the storm shelter: a small basement room stocked with hunter-esque reads. The guy had only been in their once - twice, including when he caught his former colleague breaking the rules with B&E (and reading). 

They may not find anything ther, but since Sam doesn't need sleep nowadays he agreed to pull the all-nighter and check for certain before they skip town. 

Gaze flitting from Dean and his pizza, to the leatherback book in his hands and up to the Crazy Wall, Cas keeps his thoughts to himself. He looks concerned, wary almost.

"You okay?"

Cas turns the book over, gently. "Where did you get this?" he says to the back cover.

"St. Bruno's. Got quite the collection of lore stashed away in the basement, but Roberto confiscated that one from one of the vamps, before.." Dean trails off, leaving out the details of his bloody foul ball at the local park. "Demonic possession's a big feature, no surprises there. Some monster stuff and gods stuff scattered through - most of it we know already from Bobby's. Also a bunch of balony text. But there was a couple dozen copies of that," he points at Cas' hands with his pizza tip, "so we figured we should see what else was down there that might be useful."

He joins Cas by the map printouts, newspaper clippings, highlighted notes and online article stubs. He watches as Cas traces delicate fingers over the black leather and gold-embossed spine. There's something about the way he handles it - with such care, and hesitation. It's a little odd, but then again he did kinda the same thing with Chuck's books, too. Only this time he hasn't even opened it. 

"It's a graphic novel," Dean explains, "Words and images in a badass, super freaky, pretty damn cool comic strip setup." He'd been more impressed by it than Sam. Apparently his brother's passion for all things Geek was another thing that'd been left behind. It's one thing Dean never thought he'd miss.

Cas is still regarding the ripples in the leather when Dean's pocket vibrates. "You find somethin'?" The last thing he expects to hear are the words Demon and Blood, but measured against the bar of strangeness and crappy circumstance that is their lives, Dean's not as freaked out as he probably should be.

Soulless Sam, Heaven at war with itself, Purgatory existing, Angelic pizza-men.. Anything's possible these days. 

"What about Demon Blood?" Cas must feel Dean's eyes on him because he looks up to pay attention. Dean nods along, shakes his head, wishes he had that spare Johnny to wash down the news. "Yeah, okay. Grab what you can. Forget finding a new case, we'll head to Bobby's in the morning." Hanging up, Dean can feel Cas' eyes on him. "Apparently, St. Bruno's has a book on demons we haven't seen before. Says somethin' about Demon blood relating to Purgatory, but he can't read much of it. Says it's in 'some kind of code'," and Dean shakes his head away from the shadowy thought of just how much of 'Sam' is really left. 

Code-breaking? He used to do that shit for fun, at breakfast, before Dean had even poured his first cup of coffee. Now he.. can't? Or he's just not interested? Dean's not sure which is worse. 

Cas' face steals back to Angelness, all signs of wariness painted over with a blank canvas. He glances at the clock, oddly, and places the book gently down on the nightstand. "I have to go." 

And it's not like Dean expected him to stay, but it would've been nice. Least he brought pizza. "Yeah, okay. We'll keep in touch, let you know what we find." 

Cas nods, and Dean can tell he's about to I Dream of Jeannie it outta there, so he quickly adds, "―You too, you hear me? Don't be a stranger." They lock eyes for a moment, and it feels like old times. "Thanks for the pizza." 

With a tilted trace of a smile, Cas nods again, softer. "Be careful, Dean." 

The fridge kicks on as invisible wings take flight. An owl hoots somewhere outside, waiting for an answer. It's suddenly quiet and the room feels empty in a way it hadn't before. Lonely. 

He flicks on the old box set, turns some late night movie low, and snags the pizza box along with the little black book to settle down in the neatly made bed, tossing his duffel aside.

HP Lovecraft may have some relevance to what they're dealing with, but for now he just reads for the hell of it. To get lost in it; someplace else, somehow familiar. It's a clue, a step in the right direction, hopefully. And though it's not exactly a comfort, there's something grounding in knowing the answers are out there, somewhere. They just gotta keep looking. 

There's fiction and there's reality, and sometimes the impossible is what's real. Sometimes it's a nightmare instead of a dream. That's the Hunter life. Figuring out what's dark fantasy and what's really lurking in the shadows. 

No Lisa, no Ben. No Sam, even if he walked through that door right now. Bobby three states away. Cas off at war. 

He's got pizza and Lovecraft's Cosmicism and Mitchum on the grainy tube. It's not everything, but it's enough. With any luck he'll dream of something better, something more. Probably the best he can hope for, really: if he can't have a better life, dreams might be the closest he ever gets. 

But as long as he gets his four hours, he'll manage, dreams (or nightmares) or no. 

The telltale pitter-patter of rain starts in, grows steadily heavier as the pages turn, the black-and-white noir futzing and pizza filling him, making him sleepy. He drifts off to the flicker of blue neon through the tear in the curtain by his bed, distantly wishing he'd removed his boots or at least his belt; it's digging into him, but he knows on the plus side he'll be ready to jump up and fight if something goes bump in the night.

Just another night in the Hunter's life.

[fallintosanity]

i made myself cry i’m sorry

y’all wanted angst right?

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

“Well, let’s eat then,” Gladio said. He nudged Ignis toward one of the chairs, while Prompto rounded the table to take the seat opposite Noctis. They dug in, the strained silence soon broken by delighted exclamations about the food. Prompto was right; it was delicious. More than that, it tasted like home, a familiarity Noctis had thought he’d never have again after Insomnia fell.

They cleared the entire spread, despite how much food it was. Noctis watched his friends with a mix of amusement and sorrow - as Prompto had said, they hadn't had food like this in a long time. Even Ignis’s cooking in the Hammerhead caravan hadn't been close; even he could only do so much with the limited, sickly ingredients that were all he had after a decade without sunlight. Soft bread, fresh fruit and vegetables, rich meats… they'd had none of it for years.

When the plates were empty, Gladio leaned back and stretched, his spine cracking. “Time to sleep, after a meal like that.”

Prompto yawned. “Sounds good to me.”

Ignis turned his head toward Noctis, a question in the tilt of his eyebrows. Noctis glanced at the clock and sighed. “It's almost ten. My dad probably won't have anything for us tonight.”

“First thing in the morning, then,” Ignis said.

“He’d better,” Gladio said grimly. “We can’t stay locked up here forever.”

“Yeah.” Noctis stood up, then hesitated. “You guys are… you're fine in those rooms?”

“Hell yeah,” Prompto said. “They have real mattresses on the beds! And pillows!”

Noctis couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm, even though it made his heart ache. He’d caught a glimpse of the tiny nook that had been Prompto’s bedroom for much of the last decade, little more than a tattered blanket on a ragged, sagging cot shoved behind a rusty old truck shell in a corner of the Hammerhead garage. Gladio had commented, in the caravan, that he hadn't slept indoors for longer than he could remember. And Ignis had been sharing a tiny apartment in Lestallum with four other men, refugees from Accordo with nowhere else to go. Noctis couldn't blame any of them for wanting to take advantage of the luxurious beds and private rooms, even if Noctis himself couldn't stand the thought of being alone again. So he made himself say goodnight as though nothing was wrong, and retreated to his own room as his friends disappeared into their separate bedrooms.

Dropping his bathrobe on the floor, Noctis turned off the light and climbed into the bed. The sheets smelled like the Citadel's industrial cleaner and, very faintly, of dust, but the bed was soft and the blankets feather-light and cozy. The last time he’d had comfort like this had been in his own apartment, the one he’d packed up the day before leaving Insomnia. Even the expensive suite in the hotel in Altissia hadn't been this nice. He should have fallen asleep immediately.

But every time he closed his eyes, he saw the broken throne of Lucis, looming silent in the darkness of a ruined world. Awaiting him. Awaiting his death.

Noctis shoved the blankets off and rolled to his feet, gritting his teeth against a scream of frustration. Sleep wasn’t going to happen, no matter how much he knew he needed it. His remaining lifespan could be measured in hours; he didn’t want to waste any of it sleeping.

His bare feet were all but silent on the plush carpet as he crossed to the enormous window which dominated one wall of the room. Thick blackout curtains covered it; he pushed them aside to reveal the brilliant white lights of Insomnia at night. The Citadel’s spotlights gleamed off nearby buildings, billboards flashed and glittered on rooftops, and far below, cars’ headlights traced bright lines along the streets. Artificial light, all of it, but still brighter than anything he’d seen since he escaped the Crystal.

Not as bright as sunlight, though, he thought. As a child, he’d loved the view out the windows of the Citadel, the city rosy with dawn’s light or golden at sunset. The silver-white artificial lights had their own beauty, true, but daylight was where Insomnia really shone. His friends were counting on him to bring back that daylight, to let his city - his country, his world - bask once again in the warmth of the sun.

All it would take was Noctis’s death.

He shuddered and turned away from the window. One death. That was all. A small sacrifice, really: the life of one spoiled, weak, useless prince in exchange for the lives of everyone and everything else in the world. It wasn’t even a choice. There was no other answer. This was quite literally what he’d been born for. He could do it. He would do it.

It just… hurt.

A soft knock at the door startled him out of his thoughts; before he could say anything the door opened and Ignis stepped inside. “Noct? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Noctis said, too quickly. “Couldn’t sleep.”

“So I gathered,” Ignis said dryly. “I heard you moving about.”

“Sorry.” Noct sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Didn’t mean to keep you up. Go back to sleep, I’ll be quieter.”

Ignis just stood there a moment, his head tilted slightly. Then he closed the door and crossed the dark room unerringly to Noctis’s side. Taking Noct by the arm, he led him back to the bed, his steps as sure as though he could see perfectly well. But then, navigating a suite of elegant rooms was nothing compared to fighting daemons blind, and Noctis couldn’t help but admire how skilled Ignis had grown. Not that he hadn’t already been incredibly competent, but this was a whole new level.

Ignis pushed Noctis gently to sit on the edge of the bed, then sat beside him, shoulders touching. His skin was warm through the thin silk of their pajamas, his presence so familiar and comforting that Noct’s chest ached with it. They sat in silence for a minute or two, just leaning on each other, and Noctis closed his eyes, drinking in the feel of companionship. His time in the Crystal hadn’t felt like ten years, but it had still been far too long alone.

Finally Ignis said softly, “What is it?”

Noct shook his head. “Nothing. Really. Just… thinking.”

Silence for a moment, then Ignis said, “About your…” His breath hitched. “About your destiny.”

“Yeah,” Noctis whispered. They both knew Ignis had almost said death. “I was… I was okay with it. I made my peace, like I said, no matter how much it hurt to see you guys again.” He swallowed hard, hunching in on himself. He shouldn’t be saying this, but he couldn’t keep it inside anymore. “I could handle it because I knew it would be over soon.”

Ignis made a low, pained noise, and wrapped an arm around Noctis’s shoulders, pulling him against his side. Noctis leaned in close, wanting nothing more than to bury his face against Ignis’s chest, to cling to him like he was a child having a nightmare. He hadn’t meant to say more, but the words came spilling out of him anyway: “But now we’re here, and I—I don’t know—I see you and I—” His voice cracked. “I don’t know how much longer I can do this. I mean… I will, I know I have to and I will, I’ll do it, I just…”

Ignis was shaking against him, his fingers digging into Noct’s shoulder with painful intensity. Noctis shuddered, and before he could stop himself he blurted, “Ignis, I... I don’t want to die.”

It was blasphemy to defy the Draconian’s will - but more than that it was a betrayal. Of everyone who’d died to get him this far, of everyone who’d held on for a decade in the hope that Noctis would return, but mostly a betrayal of his friends, who’d sacrificed everything for him. But now that he’d said it he couldn’t stop, and he whispered again, “I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die.”

A raw cry tore out of Ignis’s throat; he hugged Noctis tight and Noct gave in to the urge to curl into his chest and sob. I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die. Unable to stop, unable to do anything except cling to Ignis and whisper those traiterous words over and over.

He didn’t hear the bedroom door open but suddenly another pair of arms wrapped around him from behind, thin and whipcord-strong: Prompto, burying his face against the back of Noct’s neck, his cheeks wet with tears. The bed rocked as Gladio climbed around behind them, then simply gathered all three of them in his arms. He, too, was shaking, tears dripping into Noctis’s hair. It was nothing like the silent, stoic mourning they’d done on the hill above Insomnia at their last camp, each of them trying to be strong for the others. This was a raw grief that felt far too big for any of them to hold, even as they clung to each other.

But there in the dark, surrounded by his friends - his brothers - grieving for the years they’d already lost and everything they were about to lose... for the first time since he’d left them behind in Zegnautus to go to the Crystal and his destiny, Noctis didn’t feel alone.