#shut up mate
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
heartz4shauna · 3 months ago
Text
bitches just be annoying for real 😭
2 notes · View notes
annagaw · 7 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
"Obscurial and Crow”
read and adored the wrong strain by @colubrina last week, so have some art ya filthy animals
here our young lovers (or “friends" as they insist on calling it) are all dressed up for a costume party. if these elegant black ensembles aren’t costumey enough for you dw, zabini dresses as a pirate and oils up his bare chest. something for everyone!
live laugh love me a veela fic - feel free to rec your faves, I dearly hope there are some out there I’ve not yet encountered
(edit: altered my caption slightly because it came out better on reddit - I was sleep deprived before and someone got mad I jokingly criticised masquerade balls and I’m simply not ready to be cancelled over these deeply controversial opinions of mine)
541 notes · View notes
three-in-one · 11 months ago
Text
One thing we CANNOT stand being told about being a system. "Well it's still you, because they're a part of you." LIKE BITCH. We are DIFFERENT people. Just because we're all stuck in one body, doesn't mean we're all the same damn person.
627 notes · View notes
spirit-lanterns · 2 months ago
Note
Which alpha(s) do you think would be the most excited and giddy at finding out their omega is pregnant?
All of them would be pretty excited. But if you’re talking about who would react all giddy and excited at the news of you being pregnant?
Stelle, March, Serval, Topaz, Qingque, Sparkle, Robin
I feel like these women would be the type to jump out of their seat and not believe you until you show them the pregnancy test. Then they proceed to let out a loud squeal and hoist you up into their arms to spin you. They’re so happy they could eat cardboard!
102 notes · View notes
biscuitboba · 15 days ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
2023 vs 2024
Happy Birthday Roronoa Zoro💚
69 notes · View notes
forgottenbones · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
176 notes · View notes
idontlikeem · 3 months ago
Text
youtube
they make me so absolutely violently ill.
'so like you once told me, i wish you more goals, more points, more games, and of course, more cups.'
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
87 notes · View notes
carbon--14 · 3 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
pspsps phannies come get a little 2009core treat and help me decide which of these are better. plz and thanks :] i intentionally didn't put a both option but if enough ppl say i should i will
69 notes · View notes
alissssssaka · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
they're the same picture
254 notes · View notes
gareleia · 4 months ago
Text
THE KNITTING SAGA BUT ODY PULLS A BRUCE WAYNE
update: my co-writer friend FINALLY got a tumblr account, so I can tag them now!!
previously: part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4
okay, bear with me for a moment. odysseus' perspective in all of this would be fascinating. and you know what is also fascinating? the way we can do whatever we want in this AU. so we can and will keep baby Astyanax alive.
to start with, Ody doesn't kill the baby. obviously. the reason is that, while he's having his fascinating little soliloquy about the morality of child murder in JAM, some terrified nursemaid that had been hiding somewhere in the room (I imagine her behind a conveniently shaped vase) picks up a dagger and stabs him in the shoulder from behind.
obviously she fails to do the deed, and he quickly and almost automatically kills her. but he's still stabbed. non-lethally, but enough to greatly hinder him.
Ody decides to go back to his people to get first aid. he can't bring himself to kill the baby, but he also can't just leave it there for others to find, because there's no telling if the remaining Trojans would rescue the boy, or if the Greeks would take him as a prisoner/slave or adopt/lose him somewhere where Odysseus can't ensure Zeus' prophecy won't come true. so Ody takes the baby with him.
the soldiers are,,, not impressed.
Eurylochus, looking at the infant: so, uh. what do you have here, captain? Odysseus, avoiding eye contact at all costs: a smoothie-
Eurylochus in particular is beside himself thinking about the implications. but overall people are too happy about finally going back home to really make much of a fuss about it, so it's fine (for now).
anyways Odysseus is still on edge about the baby's (and everyone else's) safety, so at first he tries to bring the boy with him everywhere. but his injured shoulder doesn't allow him to actually carry the kid too much. so that job falls to Eurylochus.
Eurylochus is soooo enthusiastic about the prospect, especially when the infant starts biting his chest, trying to nurse.
the baby: h o n g r y eurylochus: ARGH! GET YOUR GODS' DAMNED KID, BRO! odysseus: it don't bite eurylochus: YES IT DO
Odysseus prohibits everyone from using the baby's real name, both to keep its origins a secret from potential enemies, and to avoid getting attached to it (in case he actually decides he wants to kill it). so Eurylochus nicknames the baby Aphe, from greek "αφαιμάσσω", which means "to leech". because the damn brat keeps biting him.
eventually he and Poletes get into a heavy debate about whether or not it's mean to call a baby a bloodsucker, and Ody, who'd been having a crisis of faith, steps in and settles it for good.
from this point on, Astyanax the Prince of Troy is officially dead. and Odysseus is bringing home his infant son Aphemachus the Prince of Ithaca. etymology is somewhere along the lines of: afaimasso (to leech) + machos (war) = Aphemachus (the blood-sucking war; the war that sucked our blood)
Eurylochus is the one who Aphemachus had gotten attached to the most, due to all the carrying (and the biggest boo). He cries all the time when they're apart, and only Poletes seems to somehow be able to distract the boy, so they end up watching him in shifts.
aphemachus: *wailing in the dead of night* eurylochus, groaning: poletes, your leech is awake. poletes, also groaning: until the sun is up it's your leech.
Odysseus at the same time is still having doubts, so he doesn't trust himself to be too close to the baby.
those thoughts will haunt him for years, and will eventually play a huge role in their relationship, even after Ody starts forcing himself to spend time with his new son to forge a bond that would hopefully stop Aphemachus from destroying Ithaca.
Aphemachus indirectly saves Poletes' life. because when they reach the cyclops' island, Poletes stays behind with the majority of the soldiers to look after the baby. as a result Polyphemus doesn't kill him.
the downside is, Polyphemus almost gets a drop on Odysseus, and in an effort to push him away from danger Eurylochus gets severely injured. his right shoulder never quite recovers, and very deep down he blames Odysseus for needing help in the first place, because not freezing up in battle is the first and most important lesson they were taught as children, and then Ody went and froze up anyway.
sidenote, in Mutiny later on Odysseus will intentionally aim for said shoulder, exploiting the weakness that Eurylochus will have been very put out by and insecure about. just to add to the overall drama.
what none of them know yet, is that Odysseus had royally pissed off Zeus by ignoring his 'friendly advice' of infanticide. so much so, in fact, that Zeus tasks Ares with ensuring that Aphemachus grows up to destroy Ithaca.
as a result, poor kid grows up with the voice of bloodthirsty God of War in his head, constantly trying to convince him that everyone secretly hates and wants to kill him, that he's been stolen from Troy for nefarious purposes, and that it's his duty to avenge his REAL family. so, basically, your standard run-of-the-mill gods-induced paranoid schizophrenia.
odysseus: so, what do you want for dinner? ares: YOUR HEAD ON A SPIKE aphemachus: a bagel ares: NOOO aphemachus: two bagels
as you can guess, the poor boy's mental health is... Not Great™. he grows up a difficult kid, sensitive, too smart for his own god, prone to angry outbursts. think a cross between Damian Wayne and Jason Todd. he's also very paranoid, and remember that Odysseus still has doubts? Aphemachus can sense that, and that scares and angers him more, which makes him lash out, to which Odysseus also tries to keep his distance even more. he doesn't have much experience at actual hands-on parenting, and it doesn't help that he's not sure if he has a right to act as a father to the boy he had indirectly orphaned and directly almost killed.
poletes, exasperated: aphe, dear, we've talked about this. you know violence is never the answer, right? aphemachus: right. aphemachus: violence is the question, and the answer is YES-
so the most consistent positive influence Aphemachus has in his life are Eurylochus, Polites, Perimedes and Elpenor - until the latter dies and Perimedes decides to stay away.
Eurylochus is the stone-faced stern mother hen. he's the one that makes lists upon lists in his head of what the baby, and later toddler, needs. he enforces bed time, makes him eat as healthy as possible on the ship, etc. as such, his status as 'favorite' is quickly revoked once the kid grows old enough to complain.
the new favorite is Poletes, who spoils Aphe rotten and has a hard time saying no to anything. he's the fun uncle who's always down to play games.
Perimedes and Elpenor are like semi-responsible older brothers, who teach him about all kinds of stuff. Perimedes is the type to give Aphe lots of different chores to keep him occupied, and Elpenor, in contrast, tends to whisk the kid away to get him to relax and unwind. he also likes to teach Aphe about stars and constellations. meanwhile Peri 100% had handed toddler Aphe a knife as a prank to test everyone's situational awareness (think Stabby the Roomba), and got shit from everyone.
eurylochus: let me see what you have! aphe: a knife! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ eurylochus, going through all stages of grief simultaneously: NO!
Ares, while he detests lying and 'cheating', doesn't want to wait until Aphe grows up to make him wreak havoc. so instead he starts trying to trick the kid into accidentally causing bloodshed. and most of the time he targets Polites, because the peace-loving fool is an affront to everything Ares stands for.
this results in Aphe often running in between someone's legs at most unfortunate times, spilling liquid where people walk frequently, hiding fish hooks in food as a 'joke'…
it comes to a head with a contraption born out of every inch of cunning Ares possesses (not much), all Aphe's wild child imagination and many of Perimedes' trap-making lessions. it's a glorious thing, straight out of something between Home Alone and the Final Destination series.
Nobody ever really catches him, blaming the near-accidents on pure bad luck. Poletes never once notices that something is amiss, thinking he's just clumsy. the only reason he's still alive is because Elpenor is somehow always there to run interference.
Elpenor is the only one to suspect Aphe, but, since he's a dumbass alcoholic, nobody believes him, even his boyfriend Perimedes. Ares gets fed up with this and starts making Aphe target Eple instead, but before anything could really be done Ruthlessness happens, and they come to stay with Circe.
elpenor: I fear no man aphe: (✿◠‿◠) elpenor: but this thing… this thing scares me
it's only after Elpenor's untimely death that Perimedes starts to take his concerns seriously, but it's too little, too late. it's actually an honest to gods accident that Aphe has nothing to do with, but Peri had sat through so much paranoid, drunken rambling from Elpe that it just clicks to him. he blames Aphe, and, despite not voicing his concerns (because nobody would believe him either), he makes it abundantly clear that he doesn't want anything to do with Aphe anymore, to the boy's dismay.
finally, a few important notes on continuity:
in this AU the journey is a bit slower-paced than in canon, so instead of Act 1 happening almost at once after they left Troy, in the Knitting Saga after the Polyhemus fiasco, pissed off Poseidon decides to torture them first before the execution, so they are lost at sea for a couple years in between Remember Them and Storm, before Poseidon gets bored and decides to kill them for good. then they spend a year with Circe as she cooks up a way to send them into the Underworld, in the meantime hoping that Poseidon cools down somehow. then the Underworld and the Thunder Sagas happen a couple months apart, and then Ody (and Aphemachus, who is kept alive by the gods purposefully, so he has a chance to grow up and destroy Ithaca) spend 5 years with Calypso, and then another year trying to get to Ithaca.
Telegonus still exists in this AU, despite not being the son of Odysseus and Circe. instead, he is the unwanted son of Circe and some unnamed sailor from that first batch that she had taken pity upon and let her guard around. because of being born a demigod and living on a magical island his aging is a bit wonky, but he appears to be around 12-15 years old. he's a charming, confident, precocious child, who takes after his mother in personality and approaches. him and Odysseus get really close in the time that the crew stays on Aeaea, because Telegonus is not (as far as Ody knows, at least) prophecized to harm Ithaca and Odysseus desperately misses Telemachus; while Telegonus just imprints on the first dad-shaped adult he sees. Aphe is sad and desperately jealous.
aphemachus: d-daddy??|・ω・) odysseus: do I look like- ಠ益ಠ telegonus: you are my dad! you're my dad! boogie-woogie-woogie! (~˘▾˘)~ odysseus: awww!! yes!! what a good boy!!(✿◠‿◠) aphemachus: ಠ_ಠ
fun fact, Ody considers leaving Aphe on Calypso's island. Aphe, who's like 8-9 at the time, almost expects him to do so. only on the morning of their departure do they have a heart-to-heart about how Ody was a shitty, emotionally unavailable father, and how Aphe only ever wanted to be loved.
fun fact 2, telegonus will make another appearance later ٩(๑・ิᴗ・ิ)۶
42 notes · View notes
skelespidey · 1 month ago
Text
"i was suuuuch a weird kid" mfs when i didn't just like fnaf and wear bunny hats in 2020 (that was literally all the rage. i was literally fucking weird since goddamn preschool. yall arent "weird kids" for having liked something that is now cringey or something that is no longer popular. i got bullied bro. so hard dude. people took advantage of me and all. being a "weird kid" isnt just liking a random media, it's about who you are as a person.)
43 notes · View notes
bookishfae · 9 months ago
Text
now lowe could you explain to the class why the fuck you would say that to misery only for it to be a fruitless endeavor a couple hours later
101 notes · View notes
the-patrex · 1 year ago
Text
not to be Aro on main but lord. I love the Giggle so fucking much. I really didnt see that end coming for 14, and even if I did, I would not have expected to be this emotional about it. Now that the overall hype died down I can with a clear mind say: this shit meant the world to me.
67 notes · View notes
ratatatastic · 1 month ago
Text
local man haunts (me) open practise yet again more news at 11
#txt#what an experience#i didnt go alone this time which means shenanigans heightened by 20#and by that i mean we were by the glass drinking mate (that security thankfully let us bring in)#and ___ kept going (lifts mate up to the glass) quieres? to all the players that skated by#and i had to just go STOP THAT#and they went they dont want our mate hmph what do they know about mate and i went. well thats the thing. they dont 😭😭#theres was a bunch of kids next to me which meant a lot players over to our side and ekky trucked over#and knocked the glass w his stick on a driveby and scared the shit out of me I ALMOST DROPPED MY MATE he had this shit eating grin#maffhew also kept doing little toodle-loo waves at the kids behind him it was so cute 😭😭😭#but anyways i think its so funny ___ kept focusing on ekky too and i didnt realise why until they just drop the bombshell of#“they remind me of your brother” and i went “DONT FUCKING SAY THAT WHAT THE FUCK MAN DONT SAY SUCH SACRILEGE”#the rest of the convo was in spanish and i dont know how to like fully convey 🇦🇷 banter in eng but it roughly went#“no he does. he has the same dumb face when he starts shit (because he kept bodily bumping into boqy and forsy)#the same 'was that me? did i do that?' troublemaker face. hes a shit stirrer but never answers to it. hes sleazy in that way.#he has the same beard too dont you see it“#and then i promptly spent the whole time going god he is just like my older brother oh this is a horrifying revelation oh god#anyways they kept saying look at his dumb face look at it just like your brother the whole time in spanish when he crept near#and i had to go SHUT UP PLEASE HE CAN HEAR YOU to which they snorted and went you said its fine if we spoke spanish here theyre not gonna#understand us and i was like OKAY BUT IM SURE 11 YEARS HERE HES GONNA PICK UP#SOMETHING AND WE KEEP CURSING SO FOR MY SAKE CAN YOU SHUT UP#mikksy and schmidty were super playful with eo. tuomo ruutu kept messing w mikksy. and ekky was like a damn bumper car bumpin everyone#maffhew ofc was very dramatic when he couldnt get a goal in against knighter and he did the horse headshake in front of us#and i went “you can tell whos number 19 because hes the most dramatic person on the ice always”#ekky was super vocal i know he wanted to practise against the empty net but aj was practising tipins and he goes#MOVE OUT OF THE WAY. MOVE OUT OF THE WAY. and aj so confused just moves like ???#and ekky notches one in goes over to him and waves his glove at him to move#also dmen + lundy were practising on my side of the ice afterwards (lundy ekky uvis kuli. kuli was practising solo. lundy was feeding ekky#for some slapshots uvis got some passes in with them) and anyways i did not fucking realise swaggy was still out because i was so focused on#the dmen until he shot a puck straight at my face and like man i know its not personal but damn did it feel personal with the lookback
14 notes · View notes
monpalace · 2 years ago
Text
LEGEND
Legend is reasonable, he’d consider, just not when he's presented with (almost) constant questions and concerns regarding his relationship status with his closest friend.
Any question along the lines of “so when’d you two start dating,” are quickly met with a snappy response with little second thought. “I saw you with your significant other not too long ago,” and any further ramblings are quickly put to an end when he sends a withering gaze their way.
At some point, Legend becomes tired of comments regarding his relationship with you. If it weren't for his aversion to dark magic, he’d drown himself in a curse of some sort that stopped any related questions entirely.
He’s never turned down acts of reassurance from your side. Whether they are words of affirmation or acts of affection, he never fails to be less inconvenienced about the event when you intervene.
Legend tends to hold his sharp tongue when you're around. He’s never rude to you, or (sometimes) to the other Links, when you're around because he always wants to be a better version of himself when you're around.
That doesn't mean he's good at biting his tongue.
He’s very much susceptible to rolling his eyes, groaning, and telling someone to shut up with a scoff. Legend might wind it down even further with a “please leave us alone,” or “can you just drop it,” if you don't seem pleased by his responses.
Despite his very obvious annoyance when it comes to misinterpretations of his relationship, Legend is quick to dispel any doubts you may have in your mind.
“Would you rather I tone down on the affection? I—” Absolutely not. You’re the only person he feels comfortable with when it comes to anything tactile; he's so used to it now, he’d rather die than lose it all because of some stupid rumor.
“Maybe we shouldn't share food or drinks anymore. It sends the wrong idea.” Okay? Who cares about an indirect kiss? What even is it? You either kiss or you don't. Besides, you have food that he wants to steal (or, he has food he wants you to try), where's the issue with that? Is sharing not caring?
One way or another, Legend is one of the less tolerant Links when it comes to his platonic relationship being taken the wrong way, only being rivaled by Wind and Four’s Blue.
“My Great Goddesses,” Legend groans under his breath. He folds his hands on the side of his temple, the beginnings of a headache working its way into his mind the longer he (forcibly) hears the group of older women coo over his supposed relationship. “Make them stop.”
A swift kick under the tavern table makes Legend’s complaints come to an end. The sharp glance you sent him reels him back in like a dog on a leash.
“Sorry,” he mutters just barely under his breath.
You laugh quietly, just barely audible over the afternoon rush. “I was trying to tell you to go after them,” you hum in an equally low voice. “I’m honestly a little tired of it too.”
“Seriously?”
“Naturally.”
There's a giddy feeling that fills Legend as he stands. It might have been the slight buzz that came with his drinks, or the more natural feeling that was released when he realized he wouldn't have to be nice anymore, but the feeling is there nevertheless.
“Will you cover my part of the bill if I manage to do it without making them leave?”
“Half.”
“Three-quarters.”
“Twenty-five percent.”
“You don’t love me anymore?”
Taking out your wallet, you shake your head at his antics while putting rupees on the table. “You forget the last time you pulled something like this; but I do love you, yes.”
“I love you too, then,” he hums, pressing a kiss to your cheek with a pat on your arm. “I’ll be sure to pay you back— eventually.”
Tumblr media
TWILIGHT
This is not the first time he's been in a situation like this, shockingly. He and Ilia went through this same scenario with the villagers of Ordon, but it's the same twenty people with the same two rumors, so everything was squashed between them rather quickly.
But this isn't Ordon. It’s not the same twenty people; it’s everyone in different eras revolving endlessly.
Yet, Twilight doesn't mind.
Every question and comment is easily passed off with “oh, we’re just friends,” or “oh, no! I don’t see them that way,” with a light laugh.
Tactile responses such as hugs, kisses (to the forehead, cheek, hand, wrist), and hand holding are natural to Twilight. He never oversteps his boundaries (whether they're set or not), so his old habits are always fitted for them.
Being called your boyfriend be damned, Twilight is clingy. He's a wolf at heart, so being around those he considers to be a part of his clan. He gently pulls you out of the way from oncoming carriages with an arm around your waist, rests his chin on your shoulder or head while listening to whatever you’re rambling on about, and presses a kiss on your cheek in greeting and goodbye— but it's still strictly platonic.
Twilight holds more than enough respect to shut down anything like “I bet your wedding will be so beautiful,” and “your children will be the prettiest,” for the both of you. “We already agreed we’d be each other's mate of honor,” and “I already told them they’d be the godparent for my kids if I have any,” are almost always his responses.
Unlike Legend, Twilight genuinely finds it amusing everytime someone gets the wrong idea. He finds it easy to joke about when the person is gone or hours after the fact, but he will stop if he finds you don't find it as funny as him.
If, on the off-chance, you both visit Ordon (assuming you aren't from there), more rumors would pop up once more. Are you another Ilia? How long have you known Link? Do you treat him well, at least? Is that a ring on your finger? Are you wearing his pelt? When's the wedding?
Twilight is quicker to cut those off at the source before they spiral. No, he's known you as a friend for a long while (at least to him) and you’ve just so happened to grow close, he’d like to think you do, it's a family heirloom, and you just wanted to see the appeal in why he wore it all the time— now, please. Stop.
“It’s not funny.”
“It’s not?”
“No..”
“Yeah, alright.”
Twilight hides from the barely cracked door, hands cupped over the lower half of his face to muffle his laughter.
He can understand where the inn owner might have gotten the idea that the two of you were an item.
Upon first entering the establishment, he was pushing himself against you as though you shared the same body (the result of paranoia following a run-in with a particularly strong group of poes). He had insisted you get one room instead of two before you claimed one bed was fine when told there was no room available with two.
He supposes the final nail in the coffin would’ve been when he dropped his wallet on the counter when you started rummaging to get out your own, dragging you up their stairs once the key was dropped into his hand.
Twilight can see the beginnings of your laughter work its way through your body and face as you close the door. The owner’s inconvenienced “try not to be too loud; I’d like to not lose any more customers because of pairs like you,” rattling around in your minds when he stopped by to return Twilight's large pouch.
“It’s still not funny,” you say, trying to steal yourself as you stumble back to the bed. “It— it won’t. It’s mean.”
Denial and the urge to be the bigger person was slowly diminishing within you. It was undeniable.
Twilight joins you on the bed, shifting and ignoring the burning pain from his scrapes as you both become comfortable. The cramping he’d feel during the night was inevitable, but he could withstand it knowing he was right.
234 notes · View notes
spicymotte · 9 months ago
Text
I think I should be allowed to punch my partner when I tell them that I’m extremely anxious about my dentist appointment tomorrow (they’ll be doing a special procedure and I’m scared) and that fucker looks me straight in the eye and tells me that “yeah lol that procedure is HORRIBLE. absolutely terrible. I felt like shit when they did this to me lmao”
because now I won’t be able to sleep all night and I am shaking with anxiety
Tumblr media
35 notes · View notes