#shitposting (not foone)

[yesthatsatumbler]

someone should make a keyboard layout where the first six letters of the top row are DVORAK

just for the sheer memetic confusion potential if it ever catches on

[foone]

I talk to God about maybe getting everyone a present for 2025 and I talk them into giving everyone a new fetish for the new year.

It won't all be the same one, obviously. If we picked a fetish like, say, feet, not everyone would get a new one, since some people are already into feet.

So it'll just be a random one. A gift, from Pope Foone, God, and all of us here on The Tumblr.

(There won't be any paperwork or official notification, but you'll know soon enough)

[steakout-05]

hmmm let's try some of my own

i think im so funny with these :3

This is the greatest thing ever

[parker-d-bloodrose]

House M.D. is bisexual and you can't change my mind. Thank you to @foone for making this shitpost possible via the death generator.

[tauon07]

hate matthew mullenwanker? you should join the fediverse, NOW!

the fediverse is totally awesome. it's a magical system, sort of like email, meaning anyone on different websites can talk to each other, seamlessly! (usually seamlessly. sort of. kinda.)

there are a ton of awesome websites (known as instances) you can join! if you don't like one, that's fine, because the magic of the fediverse allows you to follow people on all the other ones!

some of my favourite are:

wafrn (short for "we allow female representing nipples") made by our own @gabbomanestamuyloco - it's a tumblr-like social media written in angular. it supports tags with spaces and symbols like tumblr does.

transfem.social (an instance of sharkey, hosted by transfem.org) - it's more like twitter, but so much better! it allows advanced post formatting allowing for animations and custom emojis and even more! it also has emoji reactions on it.

goblin.band - another tumblr-like fedi instance, based on firefish, so it's similar to transfem.social, but it has traditional tumblr features such as notes and reblogging. i think it also has tags with spaces but i'm not fully sure since i've never used it.

wet-dry world - an instance of mastodon, running on a modified software called chuckya. it has emoji reactions too, and it has a cleaner ui theme made by freeplay (but the old one can be turned on in settings). they also have tim sweeney from epic games, and steam from steam (not really)

(there is also the software akkoma, but i don't know any good instances of it, sorry! >w<)

now what?

first, once you've set up your profile, you should make a post using #introduction as a hashtag. just say a little about yourself and what you like. you should also mention that you come from tumblr, people are really nice to tumblr users on fedi.

also, you should understand fedi is different to tumblr. you should do stuff like put alt text on images, and use content warnings on your posts.

next, you should follow some cool people! here are a list of some i know:

follow me if you want, i'm @tauon@possum.city

@gabbomanestamuyloco is @gabboman@app.wafrn.net

@jv is @javi@goblin.band

@puppygirl-hornyposting2 is @puppygirlhornypost@transfem.social

@yassie_j@labyrinth.zone is a shitposter (and really nice person :3) with lots of interesting history

@foone is @foone@digipres.club

@beigely is @beige_alert@universeodon.com

@whenthesilly@transfem.social is my bestie and she would really appreciate more followers i think :3

there are lots of other cool people you will see quickly once you start interacting with people :3

maybe this is just me, but after i joined fedi i started noticing a lot more "mastodon" or fedi links on peoples' websites, so i found a lot of cool accounts that way. keep an eye out!

i hope you have fun with your new knowledge about the other places out there, just a few clicks away. :3

also this is my first long tumblr post sorry if it's bad >w<

[foone]

Is the poly library thing like… real or is it a bit?

(And do I have to spoof an RFID tag and hope someone grabs me or is there an easier way to get into this thing?)

It is, sadly, merely a bit.

[yesthatsatumbler]

This strongly reminds me of that one time in April 2006, when I was offered one of those newfangled MP3 players as a prize in a math competition, and I didn't understand how it could possibly have worked (or have been of any use) because the box was real tiny and didn't look like whatever gadget was in it could possibly fit a CD, DVD, or even 3.5 inch floppy. (Especially 3.5 inch floppy.)

Another contestant at the same prize level got an electronic watch, and I knew what those were for, so I offered to exchange and he agreed. I ended up using that watch for several years after that. I hope he was happy with the MP3 player.

I think all computers should have cd slots and all phones should have headphone ports send tumble

[foone]

one of the main reasons I like using tumblr so much is that the search function is dogshit and google doesn't do a great job of indexing it either.

you know why I want that? because I'm interviewing for a couple jobs right now. and I keep talking to people so say things like "oh hey foone, I heard about you on twitter" or "so tell me about when you put doom on a pregnancy test?"

potential employers are googling me. but they don't find my tumblr shitposts!

AND THANK FUCK FOR THAT

[foone]

Hi I'm Foone Turing. I've been here a while but never really did an introduction post, so...

Hi. Yes, that's my name. I'm an asexual trans enby (they/them pronouns), I'm married, and I'm both older than you expect and younger than you expect, depending on what you know me from. I'm a writer and programmer. I'm better known on Twitter, at the moment. I'm well known for being severely ADHD and I'm also on the autism spectrum, somewhere near ultraviolet. I live near Oakland, California, USA, but I grew up on a farm in the south. I'm a furry, but I don't have a fursona yet.

I'm big into retrotech stuff, especially floppy disks. 80s and 90s PC stuff mainly, but I have a passing interest in everything else. I loves me some weird tech that you have no idea ever existed. I'm also big into analog media. VHS tapes, laserdiscs, that sort of thing.

Fandom wise, I'm a Trekie from way back, primarily in the TNG/DS9/VOY/ENT era. I haven't yet gotten into the new stuff, and I have only a passing knowledge of the original series. I'm also a big fan of Babylon 5, Red Dwarf, and Doctor Who (4th doctor, and new who doctors 9,10,11). I watch a bunch of British panel shows: HIGNFY, Mock the Week, Nevermind the Buzzcocks, 8 out of 10 cats (primarily the countdown spinoff).

I am a Big Hater on crytypocurrentseas and AI art. I used to be famously mad at the JWST, but now that it's in space and functional, I've calmed down. They just need to rename it and I'm golden.

I'm currently splitting my social media presence across three sites:

* Tumblr, obviously. Shitposting, jokes, queer stuff, and queer joke shitposts are all going here.

* mastodon: I'm putting my tech stuff here. Teardowns, building new death generators, fun historical weirdness.

* Twitter: formerly my primary platform, but now I just use it to keep in touch with people and make fun of the impending collapse of Twitter.

Stuff I do and have done after the readmore.

(I'm on mobile now but I'll get back to this on the desktop and add more links)

* I run lettuce.wtf, a webcam showing a lettuce to see if it will outlast Twitter. (My money is literally on the lettuce)

* my long running site The Death Generator: a tool for making fake video game screenshots, with user supplied dialogue.

* I run some Twitter bots, one of which is more popular than me, and all of which will need to be migrated soon: Gay Cats, WinIcons, Print Shop Deluxe, and Every Clue Line.

* I got Microsoft 3D Movie Maker open sourced

* I got rickrolled so hard that it ended up on national TV

* I ran doom on a pregnancy test

* I have made many horrible and weird keyboards. Keyboards with hair, keyboards which write poetry, keyboards that take 5 hours to say "hello world", keyboards with randomly placed keys, keyboards with 7 toggle switches instead of buttons, and many more.

* I tear down random electronics and try to figure out and explain how they work. (originally on Twitter, but moving over to mastodon now)

* I pissed off the FBI on more than one occasion. They tried to get me fired, they delayed my wedding by over a month, and they mentioned my 4chan nickname in a federal trial.

* I used to work for 4chan. I was a moderator and coder, I created /rs/ and /r9k/, and I convinced moot to destroy the original politics board (for obvious reasons). Things went further to shit after I left, but I am still glad I left. Oh and I also inadvertently prevented the creation of the 4chan dating/meet up site by being too ADHD to actually complete development of it. You're welcome.

* I ran a windows 95 machine for the maximum amount of time. There's a bug where it crashes after 49.7 days of uptime, so I let it happen. I livestreamed the end on YouTube.

* I've done exhibits at the Vintage Computer Festival on the history of floppy disks and optical discs.

* I've worked with the Video Game History Foundation (and others) to preserve old games and game development resources (source code and such). I'm big into archival!

* I wrote a really famous Twitter thread about the surprising way our vision works, which is still circulating in screenshots (including on Tumblr!) something like 5-6 years later.

* I made my old apartment play the Zelda Ocarina of Time shop music when you walked I the door.

* I run the Tumblr animefloppies, collecting screenshots and GIFs of floppy disks in anime.

* I run several other sub-tumblrs for collecting weird things, but I'll have to link them later.

* I am technically a speedrunner. I did the TAS of Duke Nukem 1, episode 1, and a joke speedrun of Solar Winds, where I beat the game by ignoring every single possible objective and just flying to the end, which takes over an hour.

* I used to make games. Some of them are available for download.

* but it still do, too: I'm working on a (currently unnamed) game about managing a dairy farm. Both the developers have ADHD. This is going to take forever before it comes out, if it ever does.

* I'm currently working on three books. Two are compilations of stuff previously twitterized, one is a novel:

- Always Screaming Forever: non-fiction, stories about my career in the tech industry and various other tech/science/history stuff I love ranting about.

- The Other Side of Screaming: fiction. My short stories.

- Mundane Kaya Sona (placeholder title): a linguist gets pulled into an FBI investigation into a car crash. An unknown language leads to the discovery of a wizard living in a forest in Oregon, and an interdimensional plot to smuggle nuclear weapons to another world, and break a cold war stalemate we (the planet earth) didn't realize we were in. I've been working on the setting for this story since I was about 7 years old, and I'm excited to finally get it out of my head and into yours.

* I'm probably forgetting like 5-10 major things I've done but ADHD is a hell of a drug. I'll add more as they come to me.

[yesthatsatumbler]

more-cursed-than-average hot take: 1 light year should be 31622776.60168... light seconds (that's the square root of a quadrillion, if you were wondering)

but also yeah it was a bit of a "wow that's cursed" mood when I found out that 1) physics has an official definitive answer for "how many seconds in a year" and 2) it's not any of the four-or-five numbers for seconds-in-a-year that I have already memorized

[those being 31536000, 31556952, 31556926, 31622400, and marginally 31556925]

today i learned that the 'year' in the official definition of the light-year is specifically the 365.25 day average julian year

[yesthatsatumbler]

Still two genders: bunny and bnuuy.

the woke left is trying to hypnotize our girls by turning them into cute bunnyboys

[irradiate-space]

CNC: Computer Needle Control

I just used a spare estrogen uptake needle to inject thermal paste in a tight spot on my 3d printer's hotend, which I think fills an entire line on the transfem bingo card by itself

[yesthatsatumbler]

My approximate knowledge of Slavic languages suggests that this actually means "fire (diminutive, affectionate)".

...I'm not sure which interpretation I like better.

[yesthatsatumbler]

They typo-ed one of the acceptance dates as 2105, as well. I wonder if they had to issue a meta-correction to that one.

[Addendum: Corrections to accepted dates for articles in Journal of Paleontology, vol. 89, no. 5]

Link to original

It’s not every day you see a correction to article acceptance dates.

Submitted by @bossarmadimon.

[yesthatsatumbler]

@funnier-as-a-system

Need to have that kind of t4t makeout sex where we start merging together and losing track of which body parts belong to who and by the end there's only one of us left but it's both of us, in one body.

That'd fix me. Or kill me. Either way, what bliss?

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Literally just follow people who post interesting things and unfollow people who post upsetting things and your feed will gradually aggregate.

Personal recommendations include:

@bogleech (Apostle of Pestilence)

@elodieunderglass (Bird Expert)

@evilwizard (resident Evil Wizard)

@foone (Speaker to Machines)

@headspace-hotel (Eloquent Ecology Enthusiast)

@i-am-a-fish (Shitposter Extraordinaire)

help i just got here where do i find the cool people rant about space and math and paradoxes and might accidentally spread misinformation because they misunderstood what their vsauce or veritasium or whatever video said