#shes my step daughter
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soupbaddie · 11 months ago
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brionysea · 1 month ago
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I'm trying really hard not to just be The Complainer because that's an energy I don't want to bring here when I love (present tense; I rewatch it like 5 times a day) arcane season 1 so much but does anyone remember when powder was taken in by silco and being raised by this very utilitarian merciless 'the ends justify the means' type character made jinx turn out violent and merciless as well. and vi was horrified by her and the lanes were terrified of her and piltover was falling over itself trying to scapegoat her as the one bad apple of the undercity to kid themselves into believing that everyone else was perfectly fine with being treated as less than. and that contrasts vi after vander etc. died because she was raised by him and internalised the idea that no one wins in war and fighting back against systemic oppression isn't worth the damage it causes to your own community which is why she ended up working with cait and the council like vander worked with grayson. the people who raised them shaped them into who they are today but then in season 2 jinx has a daughter and she's suddenly completely normal and well adjusted and her attachment style isn't digging her nails in until she draws blood at all. like What. what happened. didn't things used to mean something
#arcane#arcane critical#powder was raised by vi more than vander#she barely spoke to him#and powder always cared more about vi's reaction than the dead parents on the ground 2 feet away from her#which does a lot to explain 'I am the monster you created' when season 1 was so heavy on children being shaped by their parents#vi did eldest daughter syndrome too hard. vander told her it was her fault if things went wrong and then most of her family died#vi having a momentary bad reaction to her little sister causing all of this and realising that vander was right about violence#because she's so used to it that she just hit powder in the face and made her nose bleed and it seeped into every aspect of her life#and needing to step away for a moment and just feel and cry and be a child#ruined everything and it's always framed as her 'abandoning' powder (which I understand how powder would see it that way#because I'm such a youngest sister that's my first thought too. I have to remind myself that's Not What's Happening. also powder has bpd#she demonstrably cannot handle what she perceives as rejection or abandonment or betrayal or the truth being withheld)#vi has to do So Much. why is everything her fault. I so adore how much she wants to look after powder because of course she does#but jinx isn't seven anymore. she doesn't want to be treated like the helpless little girl she was that day. she's an adult#she had to nuke the council for vi to understand that she isn't the same anymore#and she's responsible for her own actions#ITS ALL SO GOOD ITS SOSOSOSO GOOD I LOVE SISTERS#*correction: I believe jinx is vaguely a teenager in s1. not an adult (being imprisoned by piltover would be as wrong as when she was 7)#but not vi's kid sister anymore either
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lilybug-02 · 1 year ago
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I wanted to redo my attempt at drawing Dess Holiday. But she seems more "stereotypical deer person" here, so this may just be a practice on anthropomorphic characters.
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i-mybrunettelady · 4 months ago
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it is an ancient ascalonian belief that lighting candles invites the favor of the gods. in every proper home of the ascalonian rites, one is lit for each of the six; as long as it burns, there is hope for that home and for ascalon. candles also invite the spirits of long gone warriors to protect and inspire ; for world is loss and grief, and faith and hope, as balthazar's scriptures teach us. so take heart, o' heretical daughter of ascalon, o' vain godkiller, and rejoin the war eternal. light a candle for those you've lost; say your prayers to the gods you still believe in. and say a prayer to yourself, as you know that death is not the end, but the end of the beginning. did your little adventure to the domain of the lost teach you nothing, after all?
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kendelias · 1 month ago
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katie’s neverending ocs 🦇   ↳ princess therese "tess" of maldonia (✗)
It did not surprise anyone who knew her that Therese has had her entire life planned out since she was four years old. It did not surprise them that she has since stuck to that plan, either - going to Auradon Prep, preparing to graduate top of her class, and gearing up to take over her mother's restaurant. Therese has always been this way. Smart. Meticulous. Ambitious. Maybe it's those qualities that the prince liked in her. Maybe that's the reason he let her plan his life, too. Since the day they met, it's always been the two of them - Ben and Therese. Or, because his clumsy four-year-old mouth couldn't quite get around those letters, Ben and Tess. Ben the heart, Tess the brains - they balance each other out. And, more or less, they both followed Tess's plan. Sure, there were a few kinks along the way - Ben dating Audrey was kind of a curveball, and adding Princess Adaline to the group was a welcome change, but the plan was still in action. That was what was important. It's honestly impressive that they made it nearly 12 years without any major incidents. But if Cinderella taught them anything, it's that the other shoe always drops. And drop it does. Because, as if it's his mission in life to give Tess a heart attack, Ben decides to open the bridge to the Isle. And all hell breaks loose. When the villain kids arrive, Auradon is swiftly thrown into chaos. From tourney to science class, it's clear the kingdom will never be the same. But Tess will always side with Ben, and she's big enough to admit they're not all bad. ... Even if Jafar's son manages to get under her skin. Really under her skin. As soon as he gets the chance, Jay promptly throws Tess's entire life plan out the window, offering to show her a world she's never known. And as her best friend falls for a complete stranger and her school crumbles beneath their own petty biases, she can't say she's not tempted by the idea. The plan is still in action. That's what's important. But sometimes plans change... right?
tag list: @rose-of-oz
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cairavende · 3 months ago
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Worm Arc 23 thoughts:
So much happened in so few chapters, how do I even break this down?!?
First off, Colin had better stop fucking bonding with my daughter! And apologizing and making amends for past wrongs! I'm a huge fan of redemption arcs and second chances and that is being used against me! JUST LET ME HATE THIS MAN!!!!!!
My bug daughter is in prison but that's almost like, a minor side thing? It barely matters right now except that it gives some background structure. Compared to everything else the prison bit is just . . . a thing.
I'm in tears over bug horse. I'm bawling. I may never recover. RIP Atlas, you were the best of us.
TAYLOR GOES TO THERAPY!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT IS EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED!!!!!!
I love Jessica so much! She does such a good job. I want to bake her cookies as thanks but I'm not sure if that would trigger some type of conflict of interest.
Fucking Glenn. I want to hate him and love him all at the same time.
Is he an artist? Absolutely! He has a vision and it is beautiful.
But also if it comes down to "letting the world end or compromising said vision" he might be the kind of person who would watch the world burn with a tear running down his cheek, because at least it was beautiful.
Look I get it. My daughter is terrifying. But that isn't because bugs are scary. It's cause my daughter is terrifying. Making her use butterflies just means a bunch of people are gonna start having butterfly phobias.
Like come on, Clockblocker gets to break fundamental forces of the universe and cause people to question their very existence!
Do not try to tell me that someone getting time frozen and just . . . skipping a chunk of time because their mind is not part of the time stream for a few minutes would not provoke some deep thoughts of existential dread! Sure not in everyone, but not everyone is scared of bugs either! I just think it's very unfair.
The Adepts are fun. Sure powers aren't "magic" but might as well have fun with the idea! Besides it seems to be working and if I had powers I'd absolutely love to lean into a magical focus idea.
I am quite upset about the fact that during the whole Thirteenth Hour thing Weaver didn't get to shove bugs down Clockblocker's throat to save him. It would have been so poetic. Saving the day by shoving bugs down throats was still super amazing, I just wanted it to be Clockblocker.
It was the most extreme level of active awareness and minor "control" while being disabled that we've seen from Taylor so far though! Really curious to get more into that, the nature of passengers/shards, and all those things. I have so many thoughts, but they're all just speculation right now (I don't think writing 75 pages of theories that all end up being wrong is really gonna be very helpful).
“If anyone asks, you kicked their asses with butterflies.” Clockblocker gets it!
It was really cool to get more into different vibes of the world with the Vegas section! I love me some thinkers and strangers.
I'm very glad The Number Man used a sniper rifle. I would have been a little disappointed if he didn't after getting into his head in his interlude - it is just the perfect weapon for him. Motherfucker over here just bouncing bullets.
Finally got to see more Bambina after the little bit in arc 8. Her power is wild, I love it! Also Bambina's mom just shot right into the top contenders for "worst parent in Worm". Like, WTF lady.
August Prince is wild. Sucks when the most effective use of your power is "human shield" though.
Considering she had an interaction with The Number Man and Contessa, Taylor actually came out of it pretty good! Sure they lost the target they were trying to bring in, but I don't know that they really had a chance of keeping Pretender. Contessa isn't easy to stop.
The only problem I have with the Las Vegas Wards actions is hiring Bambina to break Pretender free. Otherwise ya, fucking ditch the Protectorate. Given the information they have it makes sense.
TAYLOR HAS FAN MAIL!!!!!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Grue's letter was way to heartfelt. Tattletale clearly wrote most of it.
Like come on: "I could hit you, hug you, yell at you and hold onto you for hours all at the same time. It’s fitting that I want to kiss you and throttle you at the same time because that’s what you were to me for a long time. You drive me crazy and I can never understand what’s going through your head." This is totally Tattletale! She couldn't flirt with Taylor in her own letter, she had to be sneaky about it!
"You’re an idiot. I want you to know that. You’re an idiot, Skitter. You’re brilliant and reckless and I’m betting it makes sense to you to do this but you’re an idiot." - also Tattletale.
LOOK I'M GONNA MAKE THIS SHIT GAY AND THERE ISN'T ANYTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME!!!!!!!
Imp's letter might be my favorite.
Tattletale's actual letter ends with "See you there, hun?" Just. So fucking gay. Sorry I don't make the rules.
Speaking of gay, Rachel's letter!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wolfspider wolfspider wolfspider!
Like I mean come on
"Being around you wasn’t simple or quiet but things made more sense.  Your minion with dark hair said we need to be around people but I’m around people and still feel somethings missing." GAY
"Going to take puppies to your place again soon. Show the kids to them. Might help." SO GAY
"You have plan, okay. But if your plan means you’re thinking about fighting us you should know I am getting very good at hunting and skinning things." HOLY SHIT IT'S THE MOST LESBIAN THING EVER
"We both stay alive. Try hard." TOP-TIER GAY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!
GGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY
AND THE SCENE WITH THE CHILDREN!!! AND THE BUTTERFLIES! AND THE DICE!!!!!!!!!!!
dies of joy
Seriously, 23.4 is the most beautiful chapter in Worm so far and it'll be very hard for it to be outdone.
I could talk about just that chapter for pages. It was perfect in every way. Even if I knew it had to end with Behemoth pretty early on. There was too much hope in that chapter for it to end any other way.
But in the middle of all that downward "oh fuck it's Behemoth" stuff we got an Undersiders reunion! With so much gay!
Like - “But you guys mean a lot to me.  I’m sorry I didn’t say it before, but I couldn’t without letting on that something was going on.  You’re my family, in a way.  As lame as it might be, I love you guys.” My head turned from Grue to Rachel to Tattletale as I said it.
SO FUCKING GAY
She starts at Grue sure but ends with Rachel and Lisa when saying "I love you". Certified gay.
So gay that even Imp agrees! Though I've been doing the long drawn out “Gaaaaaaayyyyyyy” since like arc 2. So Imp is a bit behind the curve here.
TAYLOR WANTS TO GO ON A DOG PARK DATE WITH RACHEL! IT'S THE MOST LESBIAN DATE POSSIBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!
Weaver's new flight suit is pretty neat. Dragon is a pretty good big sister.
Cody Interlude thoughts:
THIS motherfucker! I was waiting for him to show up again.
I am so mad. I'm so fucking mad.
Cody is the worst. He's pathetic and dumb.
And Accord just has to go and get killed by him in the dumbest way! GOD DAMMIT ACCORD I SIMPED FOR YOU SO HARD!!! AND THEN YOU DIE TO CODY! OF ALL PEOPLE! YOU CAN'T BE COOL IF YOU DIE TO CODY!
Chevy too! I thought he was cool and all, but he had to die to Cody. God. The worst.
ALSO MY BABY GIRL HE TRIED TO HURT MY BABY! THE ONE WHO ISN'T MY DAUGHTER!
SOMEBODY HELP TATTLETALE!
I did like seeing more of the mechanics of the Yàngbǎn after getting hints about how they work in the Lung interlude.
The power sharing plus the power amplification is a pretty broken combo tbh. Feels like there is some pretty neat stuff that could be accomplished with that.
Fuck this man though. Simmy just had to whisper to him and just dove right in. Cody can't even conceptualize what fighting back means, that would require him to grow as a person in literally any way.
Sucks for the Behemoth fight though. I guess my daughters are going to have to save the day. Again.
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blaithnne · 10 months ago
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Menaces when they team up. Need to find a dynamic name I can tag them with that doesn’t sound shippy. Does Kaisen work
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lilacerull0 · 3 months ago
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this is about lila&tina btw.
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valleyofdeaddandelions7 · 1 year ago
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I'm literally watching the first episode of "im in love with the villainess" right now and lemme tell y'all from all the self indulgenced, isekai audience inserts there are
Rae Taylor is by far the most relatable one cuz, i too would be more than ecstatic if i were transported to another world and the pretty villainess decided to dedicate all of her attention to me (yes even bullying is attention and maybe just like Rae herself i would like to get stepped on, HARD!!!)
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faaun · 8 months ago
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procrastination is starting to have its consequences finally
#on my friends living room floor they love together but one of them has been london for weeks or maybe months#to be with her love. im on a foam mattress from one of their beds next to a glass bottle of water opened by one of them#in a mug given to me by another. the weather felt like my childhood today and it also felt like 2 years ago.#(put space in the heavens Einstein's idea and hes your friend too so nothing to fear) around the table they drank and laughed and i thought#i hope you keep growing so full with the love you receive . i hope your appetite becomes insatiable from how used to it you are#and i know youre all leaving soon but i hope one day you miss this and that youll be happy you miss it#its worth missing i think#i thought he didnt care but he said after exams hes going walk around this area over and over#(this is near where he lived and where we visited almost daily for a year)#(hed come across the bridge on a lake)#we went where she used to live and at the entrance a fox sat calmly. it just yawned and stared.#it felt important somehow. i think maybe their impressions of me will never be close to how i feel inside but i think#i love them enough for that not to matter. i dont think theyll ever know this. i dont think if they did it would change much.#and seeing them smile makes my heart glow anyway. today i tried their malaysian tea the ginger burned my throat#they warmed my heart. hes going to canada soon and hes going to the US soon and shes going everywhere soon ill never understand#how were supposed to live with memories and with seperation and with the past but we do it anyway so i think it doesnt matter much#i wanted to write a poem for the lab rats with the fibre optic wires lit with blue forcing them to turn around and around#something about how im sorry that the two photon arrays burned the inside of your brain. im sorry about the sharp points of multielectrode#arrayes. im sorry about everything we do to you. she asked to see me tomorrow. im trying to have self control but i miss her so awfully#last night my friend talked to me and i updated on everything that happened with love and the lack of it and she just started laughing#and she told me about the same thing from her side. and she told me about how she loved london because she would walk the streets#and she felt like the people were her. and her eyes would go over the people and the bag of bagels and the construction men they probably#have a kid at home maybe shes a daughter. this kid is crying for her mother and the building you just walked past caused#blisters and pain and people died in it and very likely people were born in it. we talked for hours and i felt like#i was holding her hand just like that time she held mine watching a horror film. i love her so much#my friend is a genius and i remember her picking up the charms of my phone and staring at the leaf hanging from them. shes side stepping to#music drinking dangerous cider and cocktails from a movie and chit chatting with billionaires and undergrads#i love her dearly. his head covered in electrodes. she tells me about a syrian guy shes in love with and she says#what you feel and what i feel is like cocaine. ive tried a lot of fucking cocaine.#she says ive reminded her of what living actually feels like and to never put energy into someone who doesnt see me this way.
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ann7av · 5 months ago
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(spoilers) I am rereading FW and once again face the same dilemma I had since my first read back in July 2023.
Do I think Lilith Sorrengail is hot or do I just have mommy issues?
Do I think Lilith Sorrengail is hot or do I just have a thing for mean women who are good at giving orders?
Do I think Lilith Sorrengail is hot or do I just enjoy an older/more unhinged version of Mira?
"Oh but she is a war criminal"
I'm aware, she's also a middle-aged woman in a uniform who'd carve me up like a pumpkin and I would not mind it at all, blessed be the violent tendencies running in this family
AND THE BIG BROWN EYES TOO, why would RY give her big brown eyes if she didn't want me to like her?
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hauntingblue · 2 months ago
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ARCANE DAY
Episode 4 and 5 in the tags and:
SALO BEING A VIKTOS FOLLOWER??? CRAZY. ALSO BOTH VIKTOR MISSING JAYCE AJDHSKSJ also cait has kinda calmed down... and I am sure she misses vi so I KNOW this is going to happen to her soon.... we aren't getting much of her feelings yet... she's still too onto Jinx to catch up on where ambessa is going...
DID JAYCE JUST KILL SALO??? WHAT HAPPENED IN THERE
Also vander not recognizing vi at first until she gives up fighting.... incredible ALSO vander and silco being miners and vi wearing her gauntlets that were initially thought out for miners.... damn
This is my favourite episode so far....
Episode 6 here:
Sky really being there..... of course she is....
Ambessa training caitlyn.... of course thats her new daughter akdjskms Tunnels in your eyes.... GIRL!!!!!!! THAT'S WHAT YOU DON'T NEED RIGHT NOW also the guy outside is a mage... ambessa is such a hypocrite
Vi and Jinx vs ambessa and cait.... this was always about class war don't get it twisted SINGED!!! TRAITOR!!!!
ARE THEY GOING TO SEE VIKTOR???? I looove how viktors touch on their faces leave "scars" so recognizable
Did isha just take the gem from vi's gauntlets??? Omg I wasn't expecting viktor to build a hippie commune to be honest omg he looks so good.... with the blonde underhairs.... and I do believe that's the same blanket....
And of course viktor knows who vander is.... nvm he diesnt know omg viktor asking for Powder.....
We are getting viktor horsegirl montage.... omg the vander momtage I can't..... omg they wanna stay.... singed is gonna fuck all this up NOOOOO 😭😭😭 they are already there I am going to kms
CAITLYN STOP THIS MADESSS!!! ✋️ CAITLYN!!!!! VI KILL THIS MAN!!! OMG CAITLYN...... mongoose... yeah.... and fuck you too.... CUPCAKE!!!! ABOUT TIME!!!! CAITLYN I SAID STOP THIS MADNESS WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!!! And jayce too 😭😭😭 we're never making it out of the fissures
It's such a shame the spit on here won't work like on challengers.... one can only pray I guess
Jinx experiencing the "there's nothing more undoing as a daughter" moment.... incredible
"Your absence provided a vacuum I was able to fill" TO VI???? I KNEW THAT HAND HOLDING IN THE COMMANDER SCENE WAS SUS AKDHKASJ maddie exists and ambessa knows that and still.... it was not filling her mother's void...
YES CAITLYN!!! YES!!!!! VI is so hot I am distracted... ambessa was right.... now what the fuck will jayce fuck up??? Thats the question... NOT ANOTHER CHILD!!! jayce is a menace... the guys smiling at jayce are viktor... maybe the child even....
JINX KILL THAT MAN!!! NVM VANDER KILL THAT MAN!!! JAYCE YOU FUCKING MORON!!!!! JAYCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHEN I GET YOU JAAAYCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Isha what are you going to do omg 😭😭 did she kill vander... another powder... my god another week...
That was such a good fucking episode too.... and caitlyn didn't go insane when finding Jinx that is a step forwards but viktor can't be dead... no fucking way... he was giving himself away for the people and he was going to finally die by saving vander and look at what we got... no wonder viktor hates his guts. Jayce you were so good in act one.... what happened..... alright. Christ.... another week....
#FUCKING MADDIE?????????????? NO FUCKING WAYYYYYYYYYY#fucking maddie??? yes she is fucking her. christ. jinx was right vi should have hit before all of that.... maddie bet her to it 😭😭😭#i have tears in my eyes aldjaodjsk no fucking way what the heeeeeeell ooooh my goooood nowaaayyaaayyyaaaayyyy#and cait looks so pretty....... she is still focused on jinx.....#omg isha..... jinx gave up jinx??? what...... ambessa is making hextech... so jayce is still missing.... well she is trying#and mel is still missing too.... christ and ekkos friend is sympathetic to jinx... mmhmhmmmmm also ambessa clocks everything aldjakaj#cait has calmed down.... what is happening... she is now only violent towards jinx i guess. ambessa is opening that wound over and over oof#THE MIDDLE FINGER AKDBAKSBKANSKA sevika is unifying the underground i knew it!!! yes!!!! jinx show up!!!!#cait paying homage to her mother while rictus beats up some guy.... her suffering meking her an enabler to those actions... yeah#oh no..... they know.... isha lighting the fire like jinx did.... sevika getting her arm cut... ISHA BEAT HIM UUUP!!! JINX!!!! omg singed..#enforcer vi becoming part of her hallucinations... its so over... also silco... jinx kill this man. not ambessa... omg jinx run....#she likes iiiit yeeeeahhhh.... ekkos friend... . and THE BROTHEL LADY... SHE KNOWS WHO SHE IS!!! SHE IS SO GLAD!!! WARWICK!! FUCK SHIT UP!!#OMG HE RECOGNIZES HER!!!!! HE SPEAKS!!!!! WHAT A FUCKING MASSACRE OUTSIDE BUT HE DOES RECOGNIZE HER!!!!#CALL VIIIII THROW A PARTY WE ARE A FOUR PEOPLE HOUSEHOLD NOW!!! FIVE WITH SEVIKA!!! COME ON AT LEAST TRY!!!#his eyes changing color... singed you are nothing compared to a fathers love... jinx complaining about not really having killed powder....#she didnt and vander recognises that.... amazing omg........#THE CAIT IN BED HALLUCINATION AND JINX THERE!!!! its so weird seeing them both like this.... jinx wanting to help him.... ofc...#THEY GOT VANDER???? also you know whats funny... the cape makes cait look like silco... it looks red even#why is singed based.... OMG MEL!!! HER BROTHER!!!!! OH MY GOD VIIII LOOKS SO GOOOD!!!! HER GAUNTLETS ARE PAINTED BLACK TOO AKDBAKS#bitch mittens (not even diy) damn vi she got you hard THE BITCH SLAP omg vi... your big sister duties...#singed actually venering vander.... do not help the opressor singed!! i just said you were based!!! IS MEL PREGNANT?!?!??!#she does enjoy her puzzles..... oh of course he is an hallucination.... the first time he appeared behind her....#silco and vanders old hq..... omg MORE DOOMED YAOI...... vander apologised but silco didn't read the letter 😭😭 as vi reaches for jinx omg#vi wearing her enforcer plaque without the plaque.... slay but why. no vander no loke he is a dog akdhaksj IS VANDER THEIR ACTUAL FATHER#NO FUCKING WAY A LOVE TRIANGLE AND EACH ONE GETS OME DAUGHTER AIDHOQSJOSAKL i need a fucking moment....#well its not vanders.... BUT THE SAME CUP AND STRAW FOR POWDER OMG!!! THE FATHERS THAT STEPPED UP!!!CONNEL GET RECKT!!!!#bedrock and blisters my fucking god. vander and silco wanting to build a better zaun for her daughters... AND JINX AND VI ARE GONNA MAKE IT#vander looking at the woman she likes whos hair is purple: ive always liked the name violet. im going to be sick!!!! my god!!!#MY GOOOOOD!!!!!!! VANDER HUGGING VI!!! THE SHOT OF HER OFFERING JINX TO JOIN WILL END MEE!!!!#watching arcane
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mar64ds · 3 months ago
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I would like to write down my own experience with lovelessness, we all have a different one and talking about it might help me understand it better + might help non-loveless people understand better as well
For most of my life, I didn't really questionned if I felt love or not. It's just something I assumed I did, to me (and to mostly everyone) it was like questionning if the sky was blue. Everyone felt love, that's what we all do, you see it on movies all the time, you see it at school, you see it in families (be it your own or others). I grew up with a mother that REALLY really valued love, it's the center of it all for her, which it's its own can of worms considering what kind of mother she turned up to be. She told me and my brother that she loved us every single day multiple times, I have never doubted that I was loved.
I was a very distant kid that enjoyed playing alone and being alone, but growing up I became very insecure about it and desesperatly wanted friends just to not be seen as the weird lonely classmate. I made some school friends, but either didn't last long or were very shallow friendships. My only long lasting friend is a neighbor of mine and while I would like to have more friends, I have also come to realize that the idea of having many friends makes me feel a bit... overwhelmed. Very overwhelmed in fact. I like the idea of having friends you talk to sometimes and hang out sometimes, but the idea of talking to multiple people every day and hanging out with them almost everyday sounds exhausting.
But let's get back to the topic of love. I have never been the biggest fan of 'power of love' tropes. When I was a kid I thought it was corny and took me out of the story. I was a bigger fan of stories that were more comedic than anything else, there were some exceptions here and there (big fan of digimon for example), but overall I just didn't relate to feeling an intense amount of love for someone. I started liking stories about love as I grew older, but there was something in the back of my mind that I didn't pay attention to until much later
One day I truly started thinking about it. I started to think about how characters in stories feel love, how I perfectly understood how they feel love. Then I started thinking about myself. I started to think if I loved my mother, my brother, my friends. Keep in mind, I was very young and still wasn't aware how toxic my family was, and at the time I had friends in school. So I started thinking about it and realized that I didn't actually feel any love for anyone. It wasn't like how I saw on tv, I understood love in fictional characters, but I didn't feel anything for the people I was close to. I got really scared and told to myself that I was just overthinking stuff and let it go.
From time to time, the thought returned and I continued to try to ignore it. I felt like a horrible person everytime I thought about it. With my family it was understandable as I realized that, well, my family is terrible. But with friends it felt cruel. I wanted to have friends, I have a good friend, how can I not actually feel anything? It felt evil and selfish.
I told to myself that I definitely do feel love and if I thought I didn't I just had to convince myself that I did. That it's also possible no one really 'feels' love and it's just a word we use for people we are close with and care about. Yep, that's totally what it is
I realized I was aro but I have talked about that already. Later on I found out about lovelessness. I read more about it and wanted to include it when I talked about aspec stuff, loveless people were very mistreated and misunderstood even inside the community. I care a lot about aspec issues, lovelessness felt like a big thing I had to care about, I challenged the way I see emotions and love and relationships, it gave me a lot to think about.
With time, lovelessness felt very very comforting. Those scary moments where I thought I was evil and crazy wouldnt have been scary if I knew not feeling love was normal and okay. Lovelessness is also comforting when I have to confront my very love-centered abusive mother. It's good to talk about how love isn't everything when we talk about abusers that use love as a way to come across as sympathetic and well-intentioned. Lovelessness felt sincere to me, love has felt forced and fake to me for the longest time, the possibility of someone that doesn't love but cares about others felt the most sincere thing ever for me. It felt more precious to me that someone is there for you over wether they love you or not.
I decided very recently to try out the label, I consider myself in the loveless spectrum, I'm not 100% sure if my love flunctuates and sometimes I may feel it, I genuinely have no clue. But I KNOW there are plenty of times where I don't feel it. Lovelessness has become a very important part of my life and myself. It makes me think a lot about life and relationships. It makes me happier. But it's also difficult given the fact that this is a very love-obsessed world. Which is why I want to acknowledge lovelessness more and more.
To me, it's true that love doesn't have one definition, it's going to mean something different for everyone. But some of us prefer to stop identifying with the word altogether. Maybe for your own definition of love that makes no sense, but we dont all have the same definition, remember that.
To me love is an emotion I don't really relate with and don't feel most of the time, if at all. I'm someone that wants to have some close friends but does not really want to be surrounded by too many people too much. I'm 100% non-partnerning as well. Love is not really important to me, I don't see it as something important or something to value people over. Toxic love is something I'm very familiar with and it has taught me that love really isn't everything.
Some might say my lovelessness comes from trauma, and while that's the case for many for me is highly unlikely. I already didn't feel love before realizing there was something wrong in my family. But my lovelessness definitely helps when I have to face my abusive mother
Lovelessness is super important to me. I could and will talk more about what it feels to me, hopefully my own perspective can help someone else!
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money-and-dandellions · 11 months ago
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Characters pulling their dear ones out of danger but, instead, taking the damage themselves
and smiling because their dear ones are fine and safe and—
why are they crying?
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pynkhues · 4 months ago
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It is interesting with Antoinette. I could see it being that Lestat genuinely had affection for her, even if he would certainly have killed her had Louis personally asked him to -- or it could be that she was just familiar, and he wanted the closest thing to intimacy he could get, so someone who knew him was better than someone who didn't. And the whole possibility that she reminded him of Gabrielle in some ways...
(x)
Yeah, I totally agree, anon.
I actually unfortunately suspect that Antoinette isn't a character the show will really come back to, and I think I'm one of three people that cares about that, haha, but where I tend to land on her relationship with Lestat is the fact that neither Lestat nor Louis actually have any friends.
That's not to say that I think Lestat and Antoinette were just friends, I don't, they obviously fucked a lot (which like, also comes down to the fact that Lestat doesn't know how to have friends he doesn't fuck, haha), but I do think the reality is that Lestat and Louis have very different racial and cultural contexts, hobbies and areas of interest which aren't things they can easily share with each other, especially not in early-1900s America, and I think that's a bigger factor in their relationship breakdown than either will admit to.
It's why Louis' able to reconnect with Jonah so quickly - they might be leading different lives, but they have more overlapping factors than they don't, whereas he and Lestat have less than they do - and for Lestat as a white theatre kid, he needs to be around other performers. I think with Antoinette, she's obviously a talented vocalist and an ambitious artist, and I can see that genuinely just being company that Lestat wants to be close with. They probably talk shit about crap theatre they've seen and do vocal runs together and fuck, and honestly for a part of Lestat, that would lowkey be a dream relationship, haha. Do I think they have a deep emotional connection? No, but given even Louis' willing to admit she's talented, and his own complex relationship with not succeeding as an artist, I wonder how much that factors in to his portrayal of her and his insecurities around their relationship (to say nothing of the fact that she's both white and a woman).
This feels like it's going on a hundred tangents, haha, but my point is maybe they'd step out on each other less or descend into unforessen levels of chaos and destruction if they both had a few friends they could talk about their identities and niche interests with!!
#this is not actually related to your ask but i've been thinking a bit about different family make ups lately#and while i was hungover this morning after yoga and getting breakfast with my mum#i told her about how one of our production coordinators at work - let's call her A - had a baby last year with her wife#and they had a very good friend who's gay who became their sperm donor#and he's like#LOVING being fun uncle and A and i were talking about it the other day at work because she was genuinely shocked because he's#been very open about how much he does not want kids of his own and it caused a lot of hesitancy with her and her wife taking him up on offe#but how much he's stepped up#she said he's been amazing#and he's been so helpful and supportive and done so much running around for them when they've been knocked sideways with having a newborn#and he loves being with his little niece who's actually his biological daughter and getting to give her back#and A was like we were close before but now he's my daughter's uncle and now he truly feels like my brother#and A and her partner and him are already talking about having another baby in the next year or so#idk why your ask made me remember this#maybe i was just thinking about it still after talking to mum about it over breakfast#but idk maybe it comes back to this whole idea that queer family units are inherently unconventional in our current structure#and applying conventional tropes to them doesn't work#which again has nothing to do with your ask haha just something i'm thinking about#lestat asks#iwtv asks
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cairavende · 1 year ago
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Worm Arc 11 thoughts (pre-interludes):
Taylor's dad sees his daughter for the first time since she ran away. Since the fucking Endbringer attack! And literally says the line "“I need to go handle this" about a fucking work thing. No Danny. You do not NEED TO HANDLE THIS. God damn. It is fucking hard to be a co-parent for Taylor when I'm the only one doing any parenting!
Speaking of parenting - Taylor, you really should get some therapy. That was a pretty detailed level of fucked up nightmare you had. I love you and just want you to take care of yourself.
Skitter just like "all right, for day 1 I'm going to gain complete fucking control over my territory and establish myself as an unkillable bug goddess". And then she worries if she is doing enough!
Seriously though, letting that guy stab her and counting on her costume to block the knife? Fucking baller move. Also stupidly risky. So pretty much on point for my wonderful but stress inducing bug daughter.
And then she just sits in her chair drinking tea while she destroys two groups of Merchants? Doesn't just beat them, but absolutely terrorizes them. Lights one of them on fire with their own matches! WITH BUGS! I love her so much.
She also gained two minions as a side bonus to controlling her territory. And ensured their loyalty and dedication to her.
For real. Sierra would take a bullet. She'd die for Taylor. But Charlotte? Charlotte would kill for Taylor.
The speech Taylor gave Charlotte when giving her the options "leave town" or "work for me" was so well done! Came across as incredibly fair so Charlotte couldn't complain, but also just tied her in a little bundle all nice and neat. Set her up to want to work for you. Very nicely done. Taylor clearly has been learning from Lisa.
We're just pretty much giving up on that whole secret identity thing huh? It just started cascading out of control quite quickly. I don't expect Taylor and Skitter to be different people for much longer.
Lisa and Taylor went to a party together! A shitty villain party that was dangerous and almost killed them. But villain prom is villain prom. GAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!
Just a number of good Chatterbug (Smugbug) moments here.
Lisa has a MURDER WALL! AAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! I love her so fucking much and I will just sit in there with her working on the murder wall for hours. (She isn't trying to solve a murder so I know it isn't technically a murder wall, but it's a murder wall cause that's the best name.)
Fucking Bryce. Sure went through a lot of trouble for that asshole.
Skidmark just doing a thunderdome up in here. Some people use their powers for cool things and others build a fence.
Also really not seeming to do great for loyalty. Like ya you get a cape or two out of it but it left everyone in your gang not trusting anyone else.
I love everyone in Faultline's crew. Newter was my favorite but Shamrock may have beaten him out. I always loved Domino and Shamrock gives the same vibe.
Newter got a few good Nightcrawler like moments here too which was fun (grabbing things with his tail, talking to people from weird perches).
God DAMN Labyrinth is powerful. Like I knew she was but getting to see it. Holy shit. That was so fucking cool. Literal goddess of reality right here.
I'm really excited to learn more about Cauldron and the superhero in a can stuff. Very Weapon X with the memory wiping and such. (I'm just really on an X-men comparison thought process right now I guess)
Taylor "I'm not a skilled combatant" Hebert over here as she dual wields knives and successfully fights off multiple people, most bigger than her, while specifically using non-lethal attacks on them. Taylor that isn't what "not skilled" means!
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD CHILD, STOP GETTING HIT IN THE HEAD! I WORRY!
Seeing the trigger event thing was really cool. I don't think the fact that any cape near a trigger event appears to almost pass out has been mentioned before. Obviously in universe know one would know anything beyond them appearing to stumble, but still. And we got to see more of the higher dimension beings. We in Flatland now.
Oh god there is so much more I think I'm missing huge amounts. AHHH!!!
Oh, this is important. While describing Mush Taylor says "He bore a resemblance to a particular pink skinned, scrawny goblin of a creature from those fantasy movies." That open endedness of that context made me decide she must be talking about The Goblin King in Labyrinth. David Bowie. But to keep things simple, since it might seem like she is talking about Gollum, I decided that on Earth Bet David Bowie played Gollum in the Lord of the Rings movies. This is canon as far as I am concerned.
That does also mean Mush looks at least a little bit like David Bowie.
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