#she's a housewife? that too. she's actually a person with a thought process and a personality who happens to be a housewife

[salty-dracon]

the mere existence of harue shigima paranormasight absolutely flies in the face of every piece of 2012-2016 feminist discourse arguing that “you can’t write a compelling self-sacrificial housewife character” or that “housewives are antifeminist” because it subverts 0 tropes and relegates women away from the public eye and makes them only child managers. and i LOVE that about her

not only is she an important character within the narrative of paranormasight, including the most important character in her side of the story because you’re playing from her point of view, but it is HER choice to resurrect her son, no matter the cost. it is 100% her choice, and you hear that from her point of view. in fact both ayame and richter argue it at the end of her route, and they’re totally right that harue is ultimately being selfish. harue may be driven by grief and anger, but it’s 100% her grief and anger, not given to her by anyone else.

she doesn’t lack agency because she’s a housewife either. she’s more than willing to commit murder under her own set of conditions, if that’s what you call agency, and her movements aren’t restricted by anyone. richter himself pretty much does whatever she tells him to, with his role being the investigation ability needed for the operation.

and there is so much depth to her. there’s a total apathy for everything, and a dislike for her own home. wouldn’t you be hollow inside if there was only one person in the world you truly loved, and it was taken away from you by a murderer? beyond that apathy is grief for her loss, and anger for the one who killed her son, and selfishness and yes, her choice to sacrifice herself if necessary for the sake of her son. still, it’s not all negative. she has fun watching richter horse around with kids, for instance. her point of view shows you so much about her personality, and it reflects the thoughts of a person, not the thoughts of a throwaway housewife.

basically, i support women’s wrongs, but there’s so much depth to those wrongs and i’d be doing a disservice if i didn’t point out that she is an amazing character before those wrongs.

[pynkhues]

https://x.com/snow_droplet/status/1836806686041944275

lots of people see this scene (louis reading madame bovary) as a one more confirmation of louis = housewife = mother. just as the yellow painting depicting mother and child. why do you think he relates to these works so much? and what do you think it says about writers' intent wrt his character?

Mm, I can see the thought process, but having read Madame Bovary a number of years ago, I'm a little surprised at the interpretation of Louis as Emma, who cheats because she finds monogomy boring, provincial life even more so, and dislikes motherhood - three things that I'd associate a lot more with Lestat than I would with Louis given a) Antoinette, and the fact that Louis never cheated on Lestat given he only had sex with Jonah when the relationship was opened up, b) Lestat spent most of his mortal life trying to escape the French countryside when Louis has only ever lived in cities, and c) his Whole Deal with Claudia.

I do think that it's worth noting too that the copy of Madame Bovary Louis' reading is actually Lestat's, not Louis':

It also shows I think a real sense of taking Louis' self-assessment when he's at one of his lowest points of depression across the course of the series, as an actual representation of himself? Claudia calling Louis a housewife was pretty specifically about trying to emasculate him into action, and we're sitting with Louis here where he does feel emasculated. Louis does find purpose through work - he's an ambitious man and a capitalist from the moment we meet him - and him being forced out of the upper echelon of earning capacity due to his race is both, of course, racist, but I think also is something he does find emasculating.

Louis always took his role as provider seriously with the du Lac's, I think both as eldest son and patriarch (and I kinda touched on it in my post about Grace, but the show flirts a little with gothic themes of a perverted family structure there in that Louis is both father and brother to Grace and Paul, and son and husband to Florence), and I think even having the illusion that he was providing for at least Claudia, if not Lestat (who of course is cashed-up from Magnus), was still a crucial part of his identity. It's why it's easy for him to fall into a (again, perverted) version of that role with Armand.

That's even without getting into the Capitalism of it all, haha. I actually forgot this and just caught it again on my (very slow) re-watch, but The Azaelia isn't Louis' only business at the time when it starts getting targeted. He's invested in, at the very least, grocery stores and millineries, which Lestat points out to him when Louis' making his No Whites Allowed sign:

This - - again - - is emasculating. Grocery stores and hat makers are very specifically pink-collar industries, and Louis' been making a fortune not off women's quote-unquote 'interests', he's been making it off women's bodies. And again, one day, I'm going to write my Louis-is-a-misogynyst post, but for now, my point is that it's the insult of this that fuels Louis' (rightful!) anger, not his relation to it.

The painting I do think is a bit different, but that's kind of harder to talk about given visual art is so subjective (and honestly I know less about it / can speak to it less). I do think it's significant though that the artist is a Black man, and someone who's still pretty up and coming. The maternal side there I can see, but I don't think it's as absolute as others, just personally.

[fizzing-imagines]

My mom's Billy | Billy Hargrove x Single Mom! Military! Reader

Notes: This is the ending Billy DESERVED, with some good therapy, a nice home and a family that loves him

Warnings: Mentions of abuse

Words: 4.1k

This was your first time in group therapy. It was highly recommend by your therapist to you, after having trouble connection to others. Her idea was that meeting people with similar experience to yours would help you. Two friendly-looking therapists happily greeted the group of eight, then introduced you. "We have a new face joining us today." Everyone looked at you, you could feel your face heating up. "Oh, uhm...Hi, I'm (Y/N). Uhm...my ex-husband abused me throughout our twelve year relationship. And uhm...I used to be a lieutenant in the navy, but I quit when my son Leo was born so I've been a housewife for five years. I work as a waitress now though." The female therapist of the two gave you an encouragement smile. "I, uhm, I left him a year ago. The divorce was actually finalised last week, so...now I'm here." You let out an awkward laugh, but the group also gave you an encouraging smile. A man with ocean blue eyes and curly, blonde hair stood out to you as he looked you up and down. His face was wrinkled, even though he didn't look too old to you yet. There was a stubbly beard on his face, a bit darker than his hair, and while his lips were full they were also chewed up. What stood out most were the hickeys on his neck.

"Thank you for sharing.", one of the participants told you. With a smile, you gave her a nod. "Have you thought about going back to the navy?", another participant asked you. Wow, these people were open. "I have, but I don't have a partner and my mother is too old to constantly take care of my son when I'm on deployment so that's off the table." It disappointed you, really. You loved your career and regretted letting your ex take that joy from you. "And daycare has gotten so expensive.", a man in the group said. "I have two young children, we have them in daycare." He continued talking about barely being able to afford having his kids looked after at a daycare, so the focus was finally off of you. But the meeting itself was nice, the participants were kind and understanding. Even though the man who checked you out in the beginner barely talked, until he was asked towards the end of the meeting. "Billy, you haven't shared today.", the male therapist said. "Anything you wanna say?" He shrugged his shoulders. "Not really, nothing interesting happened. Had a date, but she wasn't my 'forever person'" He put the last to words into air quotes. "Nothing else interesting happened, really." For some reason, he intrigued you. "Well, besides that this is your last session today.", the male therapist added. "Oh yeah, that too. My therapist said I've gotten a well-enough social circle to not attend anymore and I could really use the hour for more shifts at my job." Everyone said goodbye to Billy.

After group, you left the centre to get to your car. As you unlocked your door, you saw Billy walking over to your car. "Hey, (Y/N), wasn't it?" You nodded your head. "Well, since I'm not in group anymore I was hoping I could give you my phone number." Your cheeks suddenly felt hot - you haven't been asked out since you met your husband. It hasn't been a concept that was a possibility for you. "Listen, I think I get that it might be hard for you, so you don't have to give me your number." He took out a piece of paper and wrote something down. "But give me a call if you feel like going out on a date. I'd be happy to hear from you, you can reach me at any time of the day." You took the piece of paper from his hand and let out a quiet "Thank you." before he left to get into his own car. You yourself sat in your car for a good five minutes to process what just happened. Someone asked you out on a date? You really couldn't believe it. Eventually, you started your engine and drove to your mothers house to pick up your son.

After you got him into bed you sat in the living room and kept starring at the tiny piece of paper with Billy's number on it. You told your mother about it, and she encountered you to call him, but your brain had a blockage. But will it ever go away if you don't break it? The clock told you that it was already midnight, you questioned how you could sit there for hours with your own thoughts discouraging you. Slowly, you took your flipphone out of your pocket and dialed the number. After a few rings, you were greeted by a sleepy "Hello?" His voice was raspy, and you immediately felt bad for disruption his sleep. "It's...it's (Y/N)." The two of you talked on the phone for a good while, talking through details of what he wants to do where with you. Billy had good ideas, but you insisted on public places only. He was very understanding and suggested a nice restaurant downtown. When you said that you couldn't afford that, he said "Don't worry about money, I'll invite you for the evening." It made you blush a bit - you can't remember the last time you've been invited to dinner.

You two had a good date. Your mother looked after your son and let him have a sleepover at her place, meanwhile Billy picked you up from your house. He brought you flowers and showered you in compliments before even letting you step into his car. It made your stomachs flip up- and down, especially because you sort of accepted the fact that you'd never find love again. While it didn't have to mean that Billy has to be the one, it was nice to be wooed again. Dinner went just as well, you had nice conversations, went on a walk afterwards and he dropped you off at your apartment afterwards. "I'd like to see you again.", he said to you with a smile while standing in front of your entrance. It made your heart skip a beat and your cheeks heat up. "I'm free next Thursday, maybe we can get breakfast together?", you said while smiling at him. He took his hand in yours, said "I'll pick you up at 8:30." and kissed the back of your hand. You said your goodbyes and went inside your apartment. Once you laid in bed and thought about the evening, you couldn't help but grin until you fell asleep.

You looked forward to breakfast with Billy for days, and it went just as well as the first date. Billy took you out at least two times a week for the next month. What you loved most about it was that he never pressured you into any physical contact - the most he ever did was give you a kiss on the cheek. Everyone around you noticed how much happier you've gotten. It also rubbed off on your son, who turned from extremely shy and introverted to an extroverted ball of energy. Right now, you were at Billy's house, having a few snacks and talking about life.

"Billy, can I ask you something?", you said as you leaned your head against the backrest of his couch. "Anything.", he said with a smile. "You really don't need to answer if you don't want to, but since you know why I was in group...why were you?" You've had your suspicions after being at his place a few times. There were no family pictures anywhere, except one of him and his stepsister, and a few childhood pictures of him and his mother. "Was about time for that question, huh?" He let out an awkward chuckle while thinking of an answer. "My dad, actually. He, uhm, he first abused my mother and eventually me. And when my mother left, I became too much like him. I was a bully, and was a dick to my step-sister. But I eventually got out, moved back here and got help. So my sister forgave me at least, but she still lives in Indiana." You knew that he lived there for a while, until he had an accidentally and came back to California. "Billy, I'm so sorry..." you said while reaching out for his hand. He took his hand in yours and squeezed it once. "I'm okay now, (Y/N)." Even though he just told you what happened to you in his past, he still smiled at you. "He's miserable now, we put him in a nursing home in some shithole town." His thumb started stroking over the back of your hand as his eyes looked into yours. "Uhm, I actually had a question...about your ex and your son.", he said while looking down. Something told you that that question was uncomfortable to him. "Sure, what's up?", you asked. "Well, I know what your ex did to you but...what did your son experience?" Knowing what Billy went through with his dad, this was probably for his own piece of mind as well. "It honestly started when he was born. He screamed at him as a baby to shut up when he cried, then he started pushing him when he was running through the house. But once he punched him, I packed our things and ran away with Leo. Pressed charges the same day and haven't looked back." Now Billy was the one to squeeze your hand. "You did the right thing (Y/N), I'm proud of you." You smiled and scooted closer to him, letting your knee touch his. Somehow, both of you knew what the other thought about - he pulled you into a hug and held you tight to his body, while you wrapped your arms around his torso and rested your head on his chest. You could hear his heartbeat, take in his scent; you felt like you were home. Billy was the one for you, you knew that.

On the next date, you two kissed for the first time. The one after that, he asked to be your boyfriend. Of course you said yes, how could you not? But now there was a problem: You'd have to eventually tell Leo. While you did tell him that you've made a new friend and meet up with him a lot, you never told him that you're dating again. That was your mistake, because now you'd have to tell him. The biggest problem? Leo was afraid of men. He couldn't be near male teachers or any of his uncles, even male cashiers got a massive side eye from him. So his mom now having a new boyfriend, after his biology father abused him for his entire life? It didn't seem possible to you. But you did have to tell him eventually, so you sat him down on a Saturday after you two got ice cream.

"Leo, do you remembered my friend Billy that I have been seeing a lot lately?", you started the conversations with. Leo nodded his head, then took a lick of his ice cream. "Is he coming over?", he asked then. "Well, maybe. I actually have to tell you something else about Billy." Your heart started racing, and you honestly didn't even know where you were going with this. "You know when we talked about how daddies and mommies love each other?" He nodded his head once more. "Well, when daddies and mommies separate, it can happen that they meet someone else who made them as happy as the other mommy or daddy made them. But when the other mommy or daddy wasn't a good person-" You were interrupted by your own son. "Like Dean?" Leo never called your ex dad, he always called him Dean. "Yes, like Dean. Well, then the mommy or daddy might meet someone who makes them even happier." Your son continued eating his ice cream quietly. "And Billy is that other person who makes me even happier, and that's what I wanted to tell you, Leo." He remained quiet for a bit, trapped in his own thoughts, before he talked again. "So is Billy your boyfriend now?" He didn't scrunch his face in disgust or anger, which was a good sign. "Yes, sweetheart, Billy is my boyfriend now and I wanted to tell you so you could get ready to meet him someday." Once again, he thought about your words for a while. "Does Billy hit you like Dean did?" Unfortunately, Leo knew too much about abuse too soon. "No, Leo, Billy has never hit me or insult me. Do you remembered when we talked about how Mommies and Daddies should treat each other?" He took a big lick of his ice cream before answering. "That they always cuddle and kiss and hug each other, and that they never hit or scream at each other." You nodded in agreement. "That's right. And that is how Billy treats me." For the third time, he was inside his head and thinking something over. "My friend Lee, his dad has a new girlfriend and he says that she's his step-mother now. Is Billy my step-dad?" Oh, you were not prepared for that question at all. You actually expected a tantrum. "You can call him that if you want to. But you can also just call him Billy." Leo went on to ask when he was going to meet Billy, if he could cook for him with you, if Billy liked basketball as much as he does.

So the day came. On the following Thursday, you and Leo were making two different pizzas for the three of you. He insisted on making a funny face out of salamies on one pizza while you added mushrooms, olives and spinach to the other one. Once you put the food in the oven, your doorbell rang. "He's here!", Leo said while running up to the front door. "Mama, can I open it?", he asked you. As you were washing your hands it wasn't such a bad idea. "Sure sweetheart, be nice!", you said over to him. Your son opened the door and greeted your boyfriend with a wide grin. "Hello, are you my mom's Billy?", he asked. His question made you chuckle. "I am your mom's Billy. Are you your mom's Leo?" He loudly said yes before leading him inside and telling Billy to take his shoes and jacket off. "Mom's in the kitchen.", he said to Billy. "Leo, go wash your hands and change your shirt. Dinner is done soon." You could hear your sons footsteps running off while Billy came through the kitchen door. "That was quite the greeting.", he said with a chuckle in his voice. "He's uncharacteristically excited to meet you.", you replied while drying your hands. The two of you shared a quick kiss before the timer for the pizza went off. "He even made you smiling pizza."

Leo's and Billy's first meeting went extraordinarily well. In the evening, after your boyfriend left, he asked you when he would come over again. And it didn't take long until he asked when Billy would move in with the two of you. Six months deep into the relationship, Leo and you moved in with Billy. He had two extra rooms and a big backyard that he couldn't use all by himself. Your son loved it, and he loved Billy. At some point, he started calling the two of you "My mama and my Billy", which made your boyfriends heart melt. Billy and you got married two years later, you took Billy's last name and tried looking into how Leo could get it too. Eventually, it all resolved itself.

Billy was looking after Leo while you were at work. He picked him up from school and was making him dinner while Leo was doing his homework. However, math wasn't his strongsuit so he walked to Billy with his textbook. "Dad, can you help me with this?" Billy stopped in his tracks as he heard Leo call him dad for the first time but swallowed it down to not make him feel uncomfortable. He helped him with his homework and didn't let anything show until he was alone in the kitchen and cried some tears; happy tears. He continued lunch with your, and now his, son like he always does. Once you came home, he immediately pulled you into a tight hug. "What's gotten into you?", you said with a giggle. "Leo called me dad today.", he mumbled into the crook of your neck. Your eyes went wide in suprise and happiness, then you laughed. "Seriously? Billy, that's amazing!" You passionately kissed him on the lips as he was still squeezing you against his body.

Later that night, you checked in on your son after he went to bed, just to see that he was still awake and seemed upset. "Leo? What's wrong sweetheart?" You walked over to his bed and sat down on the edge of it. "I called Billy dad today and he didn't react...", he mumbled into his blanket. Oh. "Why does that upset you?", you asked him while petting his head. "Because I thought it would make him happy. And I never had a dad..." You opened your arms as an invitation for a hug, which he gladly took as he scooted closer. "Billy was very happy, but he didn't want you to feel weird about it.", you said to your as you hugged him. "He thought that you wouldn't want to do it anymore if he was too emotional." Leo hummed, a sound he started making when he thought about something, before asking "Can dad come in?" You smiled and told him that that was possible, then gave him a kiss goodnight and left the room. "Billy, your son wants to talk to you.", you said to your husband as you stepped into your shared bedroom. "Alright.", he said while getting up and leaving the room. You went into bed and waited for him to return, which was a good 20 minute wait. When Billy came back, he was quiet and quickly got under the blanket next to you with no words. "Sweetheart, you're awfully quiet.", you said to him while taking one of his hands in yours. "It's okay.", he mumbled while getting closer to you. "Our son just had some questions. But it's all good now." The way he said 'Our son' made your heart melt. "Father-son secret?" You smirked at your own words, Billy let out a small chuckle. "Definetly.", he replied before placing a kiss on your cheek.

Life went on for months. Billy was the father Leo never had, he was happier than ever. Billy finally had the family he always wanted. And you were planning on going back to the navy - that was until a tiny plastic stick with two blue lines came in the way. You've had your suspicions before, considering that this would be your second pregnancy. But how? Leo was nine already and so used to being an only child. Billy and you weren't going to get any younger either - at age 37 now, you'd almost be a senior citizen by the time your child graduates high school. So you did what you always do: Go to Billy.

"Bil.", you mumbled as you stood in the doorway of your shared bedroom, test in your shaky hands. It was only natural to him to see how terrified you were, so close to crying but swallowing it down for the sake of your son in the next room. "Come here.", he said while walking up to you. It was only then that he noticed the positive pregnancy test in your hands. "You know, I always wanted two kids." was all he said before wrapping his arms around you. "We'll manage."

He stayed true to his words. You gave birth to baby Leia and went back to the navy months after. Leo was ecstatic to be a big brother, not wanting to ever leave Leias side at any time of the day since the moment he first saw her. He went so far that he volunteers to bring her to bed on some days, and for whatever reason she'd always fall asleep when he did without fuzzing. And Billy, oh god, Billy was so happy to watch his daughter grow up. Of course he saw Leo as his own son, but he couldn't watch him grow up from the day he was born. Knowing your and Leo's past, Billy made sure that he won't be anything like your ex or his dad. During your second trimester, he went back to his old therapist to see if he truly was ready to be a father. When Leia was a year old, you and your family were send to Finland for deployment. Once again, your husband stayed true to his words: "We'll manage.". Leo was send to an english-speaking school while Leia went to a regular, finnish daycare. If you were going to live here, you want her to learn a second language while doing so. Billy, somehow, got to continue working as a mechanic while you were obvious caught up with the finnish navy. Everything was beyond perfect and felt like a fairytale. The four of you were send back to America after six years in Finland, but to Florida this time. Leia cried a lot when she had to leave, including the entire flight back and the first night in America. You couldn't blame her - she's leaving the place she grew up in. You promised her to go back to Finland during summer break, and while that cheered her up it didn't help a lot. Once again, Billy stuck to his words. "We'll manage.". He did everything he could to get Leia out of her head, helped her with schoolwork, went surfing with her, took her on daddy-daughter dates. She got better eventually and found many friends. You, on the other hand, felt bad that this would eventually be ripped from her again.

Four years later, you decided on a desk job at the navy in California. It took a lot from you to make this decision, but it was the best one for your family. You couldn't watch your daughter sit and cry for her entire childhood. California was the best decision for everyone, including your husband. He was happier, Leo was happier, Leia adapted after a few months. She loved California eventually, especially because her Dad could show her around so much more now.

"Dad, I have a confession to make." Leo made sure you weren't home. He was two weeks away from graduating high school, and already signed up for his future profession. But he told neither you nor Billy. "What's going on kid?", he asked while looking up from the newspaper he was reading. At this point, he needed glasses to even make out a single letter. "Mom didn't want me to, but I signed up for the marines and got in." Billy knew about your opinion in this. You didn't want your children to get into the military at all. It wasn't a taboo theme at home, but it was barely on the table. After what your ex-husband did to you, you couldn't bear to possibly have them go down the same road as you. "Why did you want to join?", Billy asked. He'd form his opinion based on his reply, he decided. "Mom saves so many people. I've always looked up to her, and I wanna be like her." Billy smiled at his sons words. "You know, I'm convinced that she'll be okay with it if you tell her like that."

You were. Leo went to bootcamp, your old bootcamp, where you dropped him off with a heavy heart. Billy and Leia came with you as well to send him off. "Stay safe, son.", Billy told him before giving him a tight hug. Leo promised to not die, and that was enough for him. Leia cried a bit while saying her goodbyes, and had to hold onto her father after hugging her brother. You were last, it was only logical to him. "I'll make you proud.", he promised you. "Leo, I' already so proud of you.", you said to him with a smile. "You'll do just as well. Bootcamp will be the best months of your life, promise." In motherly fashion, you gave him a kiss on his cheek before letting him walk inside.

Back in the car, Billy tried changing the topic as the mood was low. "Well, if my son comes after his mother job-wise, I hope my daughter comes after me.", he said to you and Leia.

"I was actually thinking about Infantry.", she replied.

[soft-bellied-tannies]

Little Bite #34

Read here or on AO3!

Jimin grew up with a demanding mother since he was such a promising dancer.

She controlled every bite of food in their household and forced Jimin to work out and practice constantly, leading to injuries that stopped Jimin from dancing almost entirely.

Jungkook grew up with a mom who was a horrendous cook, but she was adamant that they have family meals together, take her food for lunches, and not order out - all related to her pride as a “traditional housewife”.

She was not controlling about the food health or intake amount, but Jungkook barely ever ate a full meal because her food was so terrible yet enforced.

Growing up in the same neighborhood and school, they found a solidarity in their precarious food relationships and decided to leave home for college together.

Jungkook and Jimin meet a group of five friends very quickly after arriving on campus who immediately noticed that both have terrible eating habits.

Jimin still with a rigid workout schedule even though he has chronic pains and Jungkook worryingly underweight with how thin he was.

All their friends, especially Yoongi and Jin, make a point to encourage them to eat more starting with making homemade meals for them.

It’s difficult to get Jimin to eat “off his meal plan”, but Jungkook is more than willing.

Jungkook instantly is in shock and is amazed by their food.

“I had no idea this could taste good!”

He immediately starts to build an actual (and huge) appetite, filling out rather quickly - finally getting himself to a healthy weight for his age and height.

He continues gaining as they help him rediscover foods he always thought he hated and he actually finds that he enjoys food for once.

Jungkook’s new appetite and enjoyment for eating created a healthy attitude toward food so it encouraged Jimin to break his instilled habits too.

He begins allowing himself to eat full meals, have dessert, and drink things other than water.

Feeling like he has energy and happiness thanks to food and his now boyfriends, Jimin also begins gaining weight.

He walks and does yoga plus casual dancing with Hobi instead of forcing himself to still do full cardio, strength training, and running.

Jimin does have periods of regression and anxiety after coming back from a bad visit with his parents or chronic pain flare ups.

He will tend to indulge in candy or sweets before he leaves for a visit due to stress, force himself to work off as much as he can right before he goes home, has a bad visit with his mother, comes back with a pain flare up due to pushing his body, and then allows the pack to pamper and spoil him while he emotionally and physically recovers.

Jungkook has random bouts of guilt from enjoying food so much now where he skips meals thinking about how hard his mom worked to feed them even if it wasn’t good.

It typically resolves with one of his boyfriends convincing him that his fostered love of food now does not reflect his childhood food relationship and once Jungkook eats again after skipping for a few days, he binges.

It takes some acceptance, but as Jungkook and Jimin are still active and so happy, it makes it easier to process.

Jungkook learns to cook with Jin and Yoongi, taking pride in being able to cook for his boyfriends as well.

He learns how much he loves being spoiled and enjoys the way he can encourage Jimin to eat more too, especially when they are both going through a hard time.

Jimin finally cut off his mother after a visit so bad, he needed a week to recover - spending full days in bed while his boyfriends cuddled and fed him.

They both foster comfort eating as a coping mechanism and find themselves eating their way through stressful exams, family issues, and insecurities.

However, both Jungkook and Jimin recognize how much healthier that is than the way they were living before.

Considering how affectionate and supportive their partners were on top of the personal acceptance, the weight started to feel like an accomplishment - a measure of pride and healing.

By the time they graduate college, there is nearly 200 pounds gained between the pair and a whole lot of love throughout all seven.

[navarice]

Each character in the spyfam has their strengths and weaknesses, but we never talk about how their weaknesses just makes sense for each of their personalities.

Anya, an esper, can read the thoughts and intentions of anyone around her. Although she struggles with understanding and processing this information (she is only five after all), she still possesses high enough intelligence to formulate plans and situations in reaction to the information given to her that actually work. Her weakness, on the other hand, is her attachment to families that lead her to outlandish and dangerous situations. Her particular attachment to Loid stems from her childhood abandonment and consequent governmental experimentation. Anya is aware she is only valuable because she has her gift, but she doesn’t share this with Loid in the fear that he will leave her, just as all the parental figures before him did.

Yor, as an assassin, is very powerful and through. Her physical prowess and keen awareness for people’s emotions help her at her job greatly. Her strong sense of justice and loyalty is what gets her to complete her commissions in scary accuracy. She also shows the same level of commitment to be a traditional housewife (that schoolmaster’s words cut deep). However, her biggest flaw is that blind sense of loyalty she has towards Yuri, Loid, and Anya. As the sole caretaker of a young boy when she was a young girl herself, it makes sense that she would develop a complex for taking care of others to the best of her abilities. However, she has no perception of her own limits, which can be dangerous for Anya and Loid if situations stem out of control.

Loid, perfect in any role he needs to be in, is a man who’s potential is limitless. Franky and his other spy comrades all know he is a man who can get any job done. Cold, ruthless, man of a thousand faces. His blindsight, strangely, became this identity he built that he should be ready to discard at a moment’s notice. It can be argued that many spies become too immersed in their role, however we have been told that Twilight is unique compared to other spies because of his ability to separate himself from his missions. I bet no one, not even Twilight himself, expected to play a role that suits his most authentic self, to the point where the line between him and his missions blur. His personal weakness…is himself. Or more accurately what he truly desires. He wants his friends and family to live safe and carefree lives, and he would to anything to ensure that happens. Most importantly, he wants the gilded version of peace he is living in right now. Taking his child to school, going to work as an upstanding citizen, and having a wife who’s morals and personality aligns with his. After so long of war torn streets and violent struggles to survive, he wants a home to come back to every night.

The common denominator between the three of them is family. They all would go through insane lengths for each other because circumstances lined each of them together perfectly. They fight for normalcy and steadiness. A life without unwanted surprises. This is not only a character weakness, but also an unchecked flaw into each of their goals as well. What will Twilight do when he is forced to choose between Operation Strix and his pretend family? What will Anya do when her secret is revealed, or if her birth family shows up in the picture in some way? What will Yor do when she is also forced to choose between her role as an assassin and protecting her loved ones? What matters more: the safety of the world or this small eccentric chosen family the three of them built together?

[yukisnowywriting]

Before I Continue To Lie To Myself Again

_____________________________________________

Kamisato Ayato x fem!reader

Genre : Angst, hurt/comfort

warning : mentally unstable reader, mean words

Summary : you have to be perfect, everyones watching! But right now, you're at your breaking point. “Don't worry, I'm just in pain, I'll smile again after this, but can I cry right now? Before I continue lying to myself again”

Masterlist

_____________________________________________

The lover of the Kamisato Clan Leader, a very high position is where you are. Everything counts, your smile, your words, your actions, your manners, your face, your body, reputation, even the clothes. As long as you do everything perfectly, you could be with Ayato. So you did it, you always smiled, you're always cheerful, you're always respectful, you're always perfect. Someone hates you? It's fine, just hold it. Someone think you're unworthy? Just smile, you’ll be better. You made no mistake but everyone criticizes you? Apologize, I need to be perfect.

You were so tired. But as long as Ayato is with you, it's gonna be okay. He is with you, right?

You've been practising your manners, your expressions, everything so you could be perfect in the upcoming new year celebration that is held in the Kamisato household. Everyones there, the other clans, the important people, everyone.

It's finally the day. The new year celebration. They ended up ending the celebration at 11 so each person could enjoy the festival, the fireworks, and the last hour of the year with their family privately.

You ended up staying with Ayato the whole party. He ended up dragging you along everywhere, he's just so cute. But maybe people were taking it the wrong way, some thought you two were very cute, but some thought you were just too clingy. Probably everyone in the Kamisato household knows how Ayato loves you so much. Even Though you don't really know, He was always asking about you, trying to meet up with you, he even tried to skip his work to see you. So when you two were sticking together like glue during the celebration, the Kamisato household knew what was actually happening.

You were very happy that he kept sticking with you during the celebration, but your throat was getting dry and you needed to drink, so you went to drink alone while Ayato was chatting with some other family. You were quite close to their position so you could hear their chat. You regretted it, you hoped you would have never heard it. The second you processed what the wife of the clan leader was saying, your eyes started tearing up, you chest hurt, every emotion you were trying to hold in was flooding to the surface.

“Are perhaps still with that girl? l/s y/n? Isn't that lady unworthy for the title of your wife? Will you give a thought of having my daughter as your wife? My daughter is a very promising housewife, she is also rather great at paperwork. I could promise you that the Kamisato Clan would be much better with her as your wife, not that common girl. She looks like shes here just for the wealth-”

The lady was still going, but you can't hear anything she's saying anymore. You were biting your lip to hold your sobs. You were trembling. You were in your worst thoughts. Then a guard had broke you from your thoughts.

“Miss y/n? Are you okay? You're shaking… are you perhaps unwell-”

“Don't worry t-too much, I am just a little unwell… Oh my, forgive my manners, I will go back to my chamber. I shall take my leave now. T-thank you…” your tears started to get out of hand, you were at the edge of sobbing, you were covering your mouth. You then fastly walked away to your shared bedroom.

Ayato saw you slowly fading away to the hallway, toward the bedroom. He didn't know if he saw it right, but he saw your tears then he got worried. “y/n?!” He called your name.

“Leaving in the middle of a celebration, she has no manners! Like I said, you should consider my daughter-” “Thank you for the offer, but I love y/n and not your daughter. I will not marry someone I don't love just for the sake of the clan. Please respect my decisions. Y.n is a very hardworking person, please think before saying something disrespectful.” he says with a gentle smile as the crowd looks at the lady. The lady then covers her face with her fan and paces out of the household as the crowd speaks of her disrespectfulness. “Look at the time! It's almost 11! As we agreed, let's end this with some words from the Kamisato Leader, and the other big clan leaders shall we?” Someone of a close clan to the Kamisato Clan says with a cheerful voice as he looks at the lady that had left. “Thanks for that reply! You should've done that sooner Mr. Ayato! Now hurry do your speech and go find your partner you lovebirds!” he whispers quite loudly to Ayato's ear making Ayato blush and fastly does his speech.

11.00 pm, You were still crying into your pillow. Make up ruined, hair messy, eyes puffy red.

You were tired of acting fine, you were tired of lying to yourself, you were sick of hiding behind walls. You've been holding too much, you coulndt feel free, always bound with the thought of everyone watching everything you do.

“y/n… are you okay? Sorry i came quite late, you heard what that lady said did you? Don't worry i already took care of her, she wouldn't bother you anym-”

“Don't worry Ayato… sorry my manners were quite disappointing today-”

“No you did nothing wrong-”

“I'll smile again tomorrow! I'll be better tomorrow! I'll be more perfect tomorrow! I'm just a little hurt, I'm used to it, don't worry!” “y/n-”

“Hey Ayato… I'm tired… Can I just cry for a while..? Can I cry just this once? Before I continue lying to myself again…” You say with a weak trembling voice.

“Okay… I'll be here, always. I promise. You could rest. You don't have to act so strong all the time. You could cry, shout, break the walls, anything. Just know I'll always love you no matter what.” He was starting to tear up. She looked so fragile. He then just noticed how hard she suffered just to be with him and fulfill her duty as the clan leader's lover, keeping her reputation high even if she has to suffer with an experience that's killing her until she's near the edge.

“You did a great job, I love you.” he says with tears, he embraces his love as fireworks burst in beautiful colours seen from the window of their bedroom.

“Let's be happier this year and on”

_________________________________________

Im accepting request so feel free to request anything~!

And im also free to chat or talk to if anyone needs to chat! Im not gonna judge so feel free anytime!

[tiesthatbind-tf]

A lad finally gets some of that coveted spotlight!

Benjamin Bane (just Ben or Benji, thanks) may be the youngest of the active Autobot team as their sprightly scout who’s got a chip on his shoulder he wants to hurl into the next Functionist or Decepticon picking on him for his size, and who’s been through quite a bit despite his age, if the burn on his left arm, the slide bite on his right hand  and the multitude of old cigarette burns he’s reluctant to explain are anything to go by.

When not on the field, he’s an avid dancer (with a love for ballet, something he could only pursue in secret until recently, and something which forms the core of his offensive style) and a good enough artist that he, alongside Mirage, are the two assigned to decorate armor for the team.

His smiley, chirpy facade hides quite a couple of issues, including PSTD and self-esteem issues, anxiety attacks, and an urge to please those he trusts even if it comes at his detriment.

More to his story below. (TW for child abuse)

Benjamin Bane (Bumblebee) would be hard-pressed to come up with a single good memory concerning his biological family during his childhood, and not for the lack of trying.

Born to an upper middle-class family in New York comprising a bullish, hot-tempered police sergeant father and a housewife mother, he grew up in the shadow of the son his father, who came from a family of law enforcers, wanted him to be in order to carry on the family legacy.

That he was a gentle, bubbly, sensitive child who loved following his mother around in the kitchen and spending his free time drawing did not bode well for the image his father wished to portray, and it didn’t take long for the discipline intended to mold him into a ‘man’ to become horrifically physical when he was barely five.

His mother, already used to his old man’s temper and quick hand, would often step in to take the punishment meant for him whenever he did something undesirable, though she couldn’t save Ben from the man’s wrath completely, and by the time he was nine, he was never seen without a hoodie in school and had perfected every excuse he’d been told to repeat when asked why he could not take it off or why he would come in on some days with a split lip.

He was small for his size, quiet, and took great pains not to be noticed, which had the opposite effect of making him the target of every other larger child looking to blow off steam, and he became good at running.

Really good.

There was no running from home however, home where the walls were insulated so neighbours wouldn’t hear what was happening within, and while some days would be better than others, there wasn’t a moment that he didn’t break into a cold sweat whenever he heard his father’s footsteps approaching his room.

With his mother unable to bear more children due to an illness, his father furiously continued with the campaign (sometimes the carrot was used  though mostly it was the stick) to mold him into the son the man wanted, so he could make the cut during the streaming process prior to high school where students would be sorted into their future occupational classes.

What support he might have had from his mother in his young years also evaporated, as she pushed him to be the son his father needed him to be to keep the peace, putting the weight of the household’s sanctity on his slight  shoulders.

He was forced into marksmanship lessons (where his first attempt to fire a gun went awry and left him with a deep slide bite wound), multiple self-defence classes to toughen him up (helpful for bullies whenever they didn’t come in packs), and a series of workouts to encourage a growth spurt so he could catch up to other potential cadet  candidates.

The little sliver of hope that he would be good enough to make the junior police  cadets went up in smoke when he was assigned to the manual class instead, owing to his size and his visceral aversion to handling firearms.

Branded as worthless and only good for paying off the ‘debt’ accumulated from the classes his father had earlier forced him into, Ben entered high school with his self-esteem scrapping at topsoil and digging deeper, and had it not been for a chance encounter with another boy who was evading a group of military-classed students intending to instil a lesson about talking back to those higher in the hierarchy, it might have dug itself into a grave.

The boy, who introduced himself as Guillermo ‘Memo’ Gutierrez after Ben dutifully sent the bullies scattering, was also assigned to the manual class and both of them  decided to stick together for safety in numbers.

Ben had ruefully accepted his lot in life after years of being broken and beaten down. Memo, however, had a loving and supportive family; this kept the spark of his defiance to the system alive and he kindled it in Ben’s by giving his friend a safe space to escape to whenever the situation at Ben’s home became too intense.

Among Memo and Memo’s family was the first time where Ben opened up about his interests, could speak freely and found acceptance for what he liked and who he was.

The desire to reclaim the things he loved pushed him to seek out part-time work, which he eventually found after befriending a girl, Charlie Watson, who had helped put an end to the harassment he and Memo endured at school by playing the hierarchy to their favour and wielding her Navy ‘prime-pick’ status.

That she actually wanted nothing to do with the class she was pushed into (Navy) and wished to pursue a career in automotives despite parental objections was something that she and Ben bonded over, and she brought him to the scrapyard her uncle ran where he found work sorting out car parts and helping perform repairs.

He began to pursue art and dance in secret with part of his pay (keeping his sketchbooks and supplies at Memo’s place and taking dance lessons under the guise of after-class study sessions), while saving up the rest and planning for the day he would eventually break free of his father, ‘debt’ or no ‘debt’.

During this time, he subtly packed away important items and was careful not to anger his old man more than his mere presence already did on a good day——something which would become increasingly hard when the Clampdown began.

He would hear his father rant over the dinner table about how ungrateful the protesters who were made up mostly of the Manual Class were, how they weren’t worth the safety net they were demanding for the job they were doing, how they needed to know their place.

He would hear, as time went by, about how his father would beat the ones who were arrested, and more than once, how he would be killed if he, as the man’s son, ever did something as stupid and insolent as that.

He bit his tongue through all this and reluctantly refused Memo’s offer to join a peaceful protest for better wages and workplace compensation.

The protest turned violent after police assaulted those taking part however, and as he watched the news hoping to see if Memo was alright, he saw his friend among those who were tossed into the dreaded black vans to be brought over to stations for interrogation.

His father, fielding a call from a colleague about the batch of protesters being brought in, told them to separate the adults from the teenagers, who would be easier to break, and it was at this point Ben’s spark turned into a bonfire.

As his father got dressed for work, he crept into the man’s study and managed to figure out the combination to the safe where the man’s gun was kept, retrieving it and aiming it at the police sergeant who came in and demanded for him to stand down.

Ben, in turn, demanded for his father to call the station and have Memo released, and when his father laughed at his audacity, mocked the way his hands shook while he was holding the gun and threatened to beat him senseless once this was all over, he shot the man close enough to the head to clip an ear to prove a point, before repeating his demand again.

This time, his father complied and called the station to order for Memo’s release; Ben’s relief however was all the momentary lapse of guard that his father needed to rush in and attempt to wrest the gun back, and in the struggle, he accidentally shot his father in the knee.

Under the hail of threats on how he was going to die once his father got hands on him, Ben flung the gun where the man could not reach, grabbed one of the bags he had secretly packed and ran out of the house to the screams of his mother.

He called Charlie and explained the situation to her, as both of them made their way to the station where his father worked to pick up Memo, who was confused about the state of affairs.

At 18 years, Ben was now a fugitive who could no longer go home; Memo brought him to the manual class district where Ben could hide among allies, and it was here that he spent a few months in hiding, disguised as a manual worker.

However, still fully terrified at the thought of his father eventually hunting him down within the confines of the city, he made plans to leave and head to the West Coast, far away from any chance that he would meet his old man by accident on the streets.

To his surprise,  Charlie and Memo elected to join him in the move, and the three of them left together on a  Greyhound bus; Him to escape his father, Charlie to escape her future with a military complex which her father died for and Memo to protect his family after he was named a person of interest in the protest.

However, they were forced to stop in Texas when police were inspecting passing buses for runaway Cold Constructs. Here, they met Ian Hart (Ironhide), a rancher secretly helping Cold  Constructs escape ownership by crossing over into Mexico to start new lives.

Ian, seeing how they ran from the bus, assumed they were young Cold Constructs and immediately took them in and offered them shelter; when they explained their situation, he kept his offer, letting them stay until they had their plans sorted out and paying them for work done on his ranch in the meantime.

All three of them grew fond of him and spent a month working on his ranch, helping out equally between his longhorn cattle and the Cold Constructs who would come in scared, starving, and seeking refuge from bounty hunters looking to bring them back to the establishments they were assigned to.

Someone however, had gotten wind of Ian’s clandestine operation, and the man was arrested during a midnight raid, though not before he flung Ben, Charlie and Memo into a secret basement with three Cold Constructs who he told them to help cross the border the next day.

They did as they were told, but decided to return to the ranch to figure out how to help Ian, and when they came back there, it was to come face to face with two strangers who were also seeking Ian after seeing him on the news.

These strangers introduced themselves as Omar Parvez (Optimus Prime), Jace Zayden (Jazz) and Preston Wan (Prowl), members of a rebellion that had sprung up in the UK, and upon hearing that they had been with Ian for the past month, requested for their help in tracking the man down to save him from a terrible fate at the hands of government interrogators.

Realising that they were now caught up in something bigger than they ever imagined, Ben nonetheless accepted the request, unwilling to stand back and do nothing while a good man suffered.

Youth, size and a lifetime of abuse would not be an obstacle to him helping someone else, especially with his best friends  by his side.

[introvert-pansexual]

MIDNIGHT PROPOSE.

MASTERLIST | HANGE ZOË X FEM!READER

summary : sleep is the last thing on both hange and y/n's minds, as one of them asks an unexpected question.

cw :

COVERING HERSELF WITH the covers, y/n got comfortbale in the big bed she shared with her partner. a weight being added on the other side of the bed alerted the e/c eyed female, as hange climbed up on it, finally realived to have a small moment of peace with their lover.

a smile creeped onto the glasses-wearing brunette's face, when y/n didn't waste any time, before laying down onto her partner's chest, the warmth of their body bringing her comfort. gently stroking y/n's h/c hair, hange pressed a kiss onto the top of her head, just the presence of her making them happy and feel safe.

laying in a comfortable silence, the full moon rays peaked through to window curtains, illuminating the bedroom a little bit. with a sudden thought in the e/c eyed female's head, she raised her head up from her lover's chest, making them furrow their eyebrows. "hange?" y/n softly called out.

"what is it, darling?" waiting for an answer, the hazel eyed person cocked their head slightly to the side. "have you ever thought about where would you be, if the world would be..." the female stopped for a second, searching for the right word. "...normal? you know- no fear of what's behind the walls, death not being behind every corner and having time to waste." thinking she said something wrong, y/n sat up, her back slightly leaning onto the bed head.

"did i said something messed up?" it was now the h/c haired female's turn to furrow her eyebrows, as she watched hange stare into nowhere for the next few seconds. "i've never really thought about it." finally breaking the silence, the glasses-wearing brunette answered. "almost my entire life was and still is about science, the survey corps and titans, so imagining the world without those things is rather strange to me." nodding at hange's words, y/n rubbed the back of her neck. "i guess you're right."

"where would you be, y/n?" suddenly asking, the brunette raised an eyebrow. "i'd probably be someone's boring housewife." the e/c eyed female softly chuckled, not being sure about it either. "what about my housewife?" a smirk appeared on hange's face, making y/n playfully roll her e/c eyes and smile. "yeah..." placing her head on her lover's shoulder, y/n sighed. "...i'd like that."

sneaking an arm around the h/c haired female's waist, the hazel eyed person gently pulled her closer, resting their own head on top of y/n's. "being able to waste time would be actually nice sometimes." bringing up something their partner has said earlier, hange muttered, earning a small, approving hum from y/n in response.

after few more minutes of silence in each other's holds, the e/c eyed female shifted in her place, alerting the brunette next to her. "i'm really thirsty, you want me to grab something in the kitchen for you too?" grabbing her robe, while standing up from the bed, y/n raised an eyebrow. "i'm alright, thank you. want me to come with you?" hange softly smiled, as the female slowly shook her head from side to side. "i'll be fine." leaning closer, y/n pressed a quick kiss on the hazel eyed person's cheek, before walking out of their shared bedroom.

making her way through the dark and quiet halls towards the kitchen, the e/c eyed female wrapped her arms around herself, cold wind hitting her uncovered skin. it didn't took y/n too long to get to the kitchen, where she carefully grabbed a cup of fresh water, trying not to get caught or wake anyone else up, before filling up the cup once more and deciding to bring it back with her, if she or hange would get thirsty.

quietly opening the bedroom door, a bunch of candles burning caught the h/c haired female's attention. "um, hange?" y/n called out, causing hange jump at their place, stand away from the drawer and hide one of their hands behind their back. "y/n, you're back." nervously chuckling, the hazel eyed person pushed their glasses higher with their other hand. "is something wrong? what's all this about?"

"you were right about having time to waste being nice, but that's not how it works right now, which made me realise i can no longer waste my time." hange made their way closer to their lover, making her slightly furrow her eyebrows. "i'm actually pretty nervous, but um- here i go." the glasses-wearing brunette nervously chuckled, before taking a deep breath.

"you, y/n, understand me more than anyone i know, and i couldn't be more grateful for that, because no matter what, you're always by my side. you made me realise life's about more than just fighting and showed me even in a world like this, loving is worth it. i can't help, but love you and i want to protect you no matter what, because i can't stand just the thought of you not being here. and when i say i'd love to spend the rest of my life with you, i mean it."

tears formed up in the corners of y/n's e/c eyes, at the sight of hange slowly kneeling down on one of their knees and opening the small box they've been hiding behind their back until now. "the only question i have for you right now..." the golden ring caught y/n's eyes, the second hange opened the small box. "y/n l/n, will you marry me?"

covering her mouth with her hand, the e/c eyed female was loss of words. meeting hange changed her entire life and she couldn't be grateful enough for someone so caring, loving and understanding like hange in her life. words weren't enough to explain how y/n feels towards the brunette, meaning spending the rest of her life with hange would make her the happiest person in the world.

"yes! yes hange, i will marry you!" letting the salty tears ran down her cheeks, y/n couldn't stop smiling. not being able to help it, hange quietly sobbed, while they stood up from the ground and gently grabbed the female's hand. carefully sliding the golden band onto her ring finger, y/n's loving gaze never left hange's slightly concerned one, as the second they raised their head to look up, the h/c haired female smashed her lips against theirs.

with both y/n's hands on each of hange's cheeks, their hands roamed over her frame, holding y/n as close as possible. the kiss was passionate, full of true happiness and love. as the couple smiled to the kissed, the h/c haired female sneaked her arms around the brunette's neck, hiding her face in the crook of their neck in process.

"i love you, hange." y/n whispered, causing a soft chuckle escape hange's lips. "i love you, y/n." whispering back, the hazel eyed person pressed a kiss on the side of the female's head, as they both continued to enjoy the warm embrace, not being able to be more grateful.

[mxtcha-tea]

Useless Love Letter.

✎desc; when he receives a love letter from someone else and you're unphased by it.

✎pairing[s]; tsukishima x gn!reader, matsukawa x gn!reader (let me know if i miss any)

✎genre; angst, unrequited love (not proofread)

✎warning[s]; cursing

✎language[s]; english

✎chef note; AHHSHDBJSJSUD WRITER'S BLOCK HITS ME WHEN I'M DOING KUROO'S PART HNNNN, please give me ideas for this...

Tsukishima Kei

You stopped right in front of your classroom’s door frame when you saw a girl shyly standing in front of you while looking down on the floor. Her rosy cheeks peaked from her long and beautiful hair, biting her lip. You recognize her from the other class since she has been visiting your class a few times.

Then, your eyes landed on the letter, slightly crumpled up on her hand. Your mind spiralled a bit at your first thought, that she’s going to give you a love letter, but then again, you snapped out from the thought and focus back on her figure,

“Can I help you?”

She flinched, slowly looking up from the ground and making brief eye contact with you, “Um, c-can you hand this to...Tsukishima….?”

Handing you the letter in her hand as you sighed in relief internally, taking it from her, “You mean Kei? Sure, I’ll let you know his reaction okay?” The girl slowly looks back at you again, giving her a small smile.

A blink as a response as a small smile started forming up on her face before nodding and started jogging back to her class.

You sighed, looking at the love letter for your beloved best friend, “Ah, young love~”

A chuckle escaped from your lips at the thought despite not even being that different in age gap with Tsukishima. You turned around, finding his figure sitting on his desk while listening to his headphones as always. You walked towards him and sat on the chair in front of you.

The male opens his eyes at the sound you made with the chair and put on an annoyed look, expecting yet another rant from you until he saw the mischievous smirk plastered upon your face,

“What do you want?” He blandly asked, not even bothering to put his headphones down. You pouted at that,

“Oh, c’mone, can’t you be more nice with me? I even bring good news right now,”

Tsukishima lifted a brow as his eyes traveled around you until the familiar white envelope caught his eyes. His breath hitches a bit as his cheeks started heating up. Without making it any obvious for you of course.

Is that a love letter? Why do you have one in your hand right now? Are you...confessing to him? He mentally slaps himself in the face and focuses back to what you have to say, hoping that it is about the love letter, “What?”

You hold out the letter onto his face with an excited grin, covering his face. He groaned, trying to put it back down but still took a glimpse of the small red heart in the middle. He snatched it from your hands, finally putting down his headphones and examined it.

Before he can ask you any questions to make it seem like he’s oblivious to it (but in reality he’s not), you spoke first.

And oh boy, it’s really not what he’s hoping for,

“The girl from class 3 asked me to give it to you, and as you can tell, I think she has a little crushy- crush on you~” You grinned, quite oblivious to the emotions welled up inside him now.

Not like he’ll show it any obvious anyway. The slight hope in his eyes died down as he looked back at the letter with no emotions. As if the letter itself has no meaning whatsoever to him.

It’s true, because it’s not from a certain person in his mind, so why would he look at it with excitement?

“Yeah, sure, so what?” You frowned at his response, putting the letter down on the very corner of his desk while rolling his eyes and putting his headphones back on, “What’s with that response? Don’t you feel, I don’t know, excited or something? I mean, I would get excited if I get a love letter from someone,”

‘Because it’s not from you’

“Because there’s no purpose to it? How do you even expect me to react when someone give me a stupid letter? Also, how come you’re not even bothered by it?”

The last question slips from his lips as he yelled at himself internally but trying to not make it any more obvious that he didn’t mean to say that. Thankfully you didn’t caught on to it, like every other time,

“Should I be bothered by it tho? I think that I’m happy that you finally receive one because your lonely ass needs a s/o. You shouldn’t ignore it too, y’know,” You pouted, resting your head on your palm while looking out from the class window.

Tsukishima frowned, it’s not the response he’s hoping from you, then again, he should’ve seen it coming. But it still hurts,

“I already promised her that I’m going to tell her your response-” “Just tell her that I don’t accept the confession,” He sighed, waving his hand around as he buried his head on his arm, avoiding your stare,

“Tch, whatever I guess, if she cries because of it then you’re responsible for it,” He grunted, looking back onto your eyes.

They look as pretty as ever, just like yesterday, and honestly everyday. But he can still couldn’t admit it,

“Shut up, have you finished the english work?” You widen your eyes at that panickly holding onto his table, “FUCK, I HAVEN’T FINISHED THE LAST ONE YET,”

You quickly went to your seat and rummaged around your bag, pulling out two books and a pen before landing back at your previous seat. The blonde sighed, rolling his eyes and put down his headphones while watching you flip through the english textbook.

The love letter left next to him.

Tsukishima walked through the hallway with Yamaguchi next to him. In the end, he still keeps the love letter thanks to your pestering. If you hadn’t stopped him from throwing it away, he could’ve caught into some unnecessary drama.

Yamaguchi takes a glance at the blonde next to him, then at the letter inside his pocket. Slightly crumpled and dirty from the amount of ignorance he gave to it, “Tsuki, sorry to hear about that. So, did they know about it? Y’know, about your crush on them,”

He kept on walking towards the gym, where Hinata had asked both of them to help him and Kageyama practice a bit during lunch. His face unphased and hands left on his sides,

“No, still oblivious. And I’m pretty sure that…”

His words fell on deaf ears when both of them reached the noisy gym, filled with the balls hitting every corner of the room along with Hinata, Kageyama and…

Your voice.

Both of them took a peek inside through the small opening and his eyes went wide when you spike a ball, holding up your hand in victory and clapping hands with Hinata and Kageyama.

Yamaguchi sighed, half lidded eyes staring at his best friend, “And because they have another person in mind right?” The blonde looked at Yamaguchi and pulled out the letter from his pocket.

Hollowly looking at it’s crumpled up state before averting his pupils back to your beamed figure talking with a flustered Kageyama. The expression you’re wearing is enough to make it obvious on who you’re REALLY into.

Tsukishima clenched his hand, crumpling the letter fully with a dead stare towards both of your figures. He calmed his mind a bit, looking up with his eyes closed avoiding tears falling down.

His friend gave him a pity look, patting his back. He throw the letter at the trash bin and turn his expression back to neutral again,

“I fucking hate them. Whatever, it’s not like I care anyway,”

Matsukawa Issei

“Fuck, gross!”

You punched Matsukawa’s shoulder, laughing in the process while walking with him towards your classroom. He chuckled, shrugging slightly and catching the familiar frame of both you and his class,

“What? I already told you it was once,” “Shut up loser,” You shake your head, walking ahead of him and entering the classroom. Greeting some of your classmates that’s either talking with one another or playing cards.

The latter yawned, slouching his figure a bit as his eyes caught something on his desk. He stares at it for a second before realizing it’s a letter and a little bento. He walked towards it and lifted the letter up, “[y/n]!”

After putting your watch down on your desk, you look back at him, “Hm?” He held the letter up as it caught your attention. You walked towards his desk and take a look at the letter closer,

“Oh fuck, you got a confession letter!” Matsukawa looks at the letter back and flip it showing a name written in cursive, “Miyahara...Sora,” He read it out loud as you widen your eyes at that,

“MIYAHARA?? Mattsun, that’s like, the sweetest girl in our whole school, she likes you?” He barely shrugged, “Seemed so,”

You rose a brow at that, “Aren’t you excited? She’s really popular and to know that she has a crush on you?? Of all people?”

“Oh shut up, who’s even getting the letter right now?” He lightly hit your head and put the letter down, grabbing the bento next. He opens it as your eyes sparkled at the content. As expected from the cinnamon roll of a person Miyahara is, the food was aesthetically pleasing to look at and even smells good for bonus point,

“Well, at least she’s one good housewife,” “Oh my god, stop with your housewife kink,” You groaned, earning a laugh from him as he handed it to you, “And you seemed like you wanted a taste,”

You flinched at his statement and wearily looked at the bento in front of you. You wanted to refuse since it’s for him but the octopus sausage is practically calling you to eat it,

“Fuck this,” You grabbed one of it and chewed happily, making a sound of content as the ravenette watches you eat it. But, now that he started realizing it, you didn’t seem bothered by him getting a love letter from some popular girl that he didn’t bother to know about.

In fact, it looks like you’re actually rooting for the romance between him and ‘Miyahara’ to blossom.

His smile faltered a bit but then he put back his usual grin when you turn your head to him, “Can I eat one more- wait, no! It’s for you, one is enough,” “Are you sure?” “...”

You reached out your hand to grab the onigiri and stuffed it inside your mouth, earning a chuckle from Matsukawa, grabbing one too,

“Mn, what did she put in here? Tuna mayo?”

“Hm, taste like it honestly,”

“It’s good, dang I hope that I can have her make bentos for me,”

“Yeah, sure,”

The letter’s still rested on his hand, he fiddled with it and left it unopened. He doesn’t want to open it since he could already tell that he won’t feel anything while reading it. Matsukawa saw your figure running towards him as you stopped right in front of him, panting,

“Hey chief, you okay?” He asked with a lopsided grin, you stand up straight and look at him with a glare, “Why didn’t you tell me that you don’t have practice right now?! I had to deal with Oikawa’s ass inside the gym and cleaning it up since none of the others want to!”

He dodged your attacks as you continue your rambling, “And what’s worst is that your stupid volleyball gym is so fucking far away from the school main gate!”

You stopped trying to hit him when he catches your wrist and shoving it back down, “Geez, sorry I guess, don’t get so worked up with it since you knew that this isn’t the first time it happened,”

A sigh escaped from you, letting go of his grip as you opened your shoe locker. He chuckled, leaning against the locker with one hand inside his pocket while the other still holding the letter.

While struggling to put your shoes back on, you catch a glimpse of the letter previously from your class, “You still haven’t read it?”

He looks at the letter then back at you, “Nah, I don’t feel like reading it right now,” You scoffed, standing up straight and hit your front shoe onto the floor, “Well, I hope you would read it anytime soon, not making the owner of the letter to wait for your response,”

You froze a bit and looks at him with a small smile, “Wait, don’t tell me you have a crush on me so that’s why you haven’t read it,”

His eyes widened at that as both of you stare into each other, his cheeks heating up at the contact. Was he really that obvious? No, if you had already known it, you would have tease him about it a little earlier. He kept himself calm under your stare as he coughed,

“Pfft, what? Of course not, you’re seriously hallucinating right now,” “Oh,” You chuckled, leaning against the locker besides him, “Thank goodness,”

You easily stated.

Matsukawa can feel himself getting stabbed from the back at your mere words, and he started noticing why you still pestered him to accept the letter. How can it not be any obvious? You don’t love him more than friends.

Then again, you act so carefree around him, you’re always comfortable with him and could effortlessly talk with him without being shy. That it became hard to know if you like him or not.

Some days you would just be next to him engulfed with silence and he would think that you’re in love with him. If only, that was true and not a scenario that he made up. But it’s quite impossible isn’t it? There’s actually no way for you to hold up a more-than-friends feelings towards him.

That’s pretty much the number one ‘not to’ rule as best friends. And he broke that sole rule. How stupid of him, he should’ve known better.

“I just know that you two would be the perfect couple, I mean, you two are so cute together now that I think about it!” You give him a bright smile,

The same smile that made him fall in love, and the same one that got his heart broken,

“I’ll be your number one wing person, so I hope you could read the letter when you got home,” He blinks, chuckling at that while putting on a smile that could’ve mirrored yours, if it isn’t so fake,

“Whatever,”

You smack his shoulder and wave your hand at him, “Loser, see you tomorrow, kachow,” He waved back, almost half heartedly, “Kachow,”

And with that, you’re running out from the gate, trying to not miss the train again. Half way through it, you tripped on a rock but quickly gained balance and started running again.

His hand fell down to his sides, the smile on his face disappearing in a second. He lifted up the letter, almost glaring down on it as he speed walked towards the nearest trash bin.

And almost too easily ripped it into half, throwing it away and not caring that the owner would find it anytime soon. He held up his middle finger at it, sticking his tongue out at the process, “Fuck you, you ruined my fucking life, Miyahara,”

Matsukawa frowned, searching through his pocket and pulling out his phone, dialing a number that’s all too familiar to him.

It let out a few beeps before the call was accepted, “Hey, what’s up?”

Hanamaki’s voice echoed from it, a little bit hoarse from sleeping the whole day. He covered his face, letting a sigh before responding,

“Hey, I know that you’re sick right now, but can I go to your house?”

A line of silence filled in the gap between them before his other best friend responded back, “Is this about [y/n]?” His voice now laced in pity, almost knowing exactly what happened between you two while he’s away.

He let out a forced smile as his vision started to blur and sting from the tears welling up. He bite his lip, trying to calm himself from breaking down right there, letting the whole school see him crumbling,

“Isn’t it obvious enough? I even bet that you had known about this in the first place,”

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

Notting Hill AU Snippet #6

When they finally leave her brother's house, Lena is simultaneously exhausted and wired. Exhausted, because even a good time takes it out of her, and yet wired because the world's most famous woman is right next to her on the sidewalk, nudging shoulders as they walk down the block. It makes for a heady combination, which is the only reason at all that Lena finds herself rising to Kara's challenge of climbing over a wrought iron gate to the garden beyond.

"For the record," she huffs, struggling to find purchase with her bare hands, "I am not dressed for this-- whoopsie daisy!"

What the FUCK did she just say?

"What did you just say?" Kara echoes, her smile audible in the dark.

"Nothing," Lena brushes off as she resets. "Just, trying to get a decent foothold-- whoops!"

She slips again, and this time Kara laughs, the sound loud and musical. "You said whoopsy daisy. Like some mid-century housewife--"

"You keep distracting me!"

"From what? Another whoopsy daisy?" Kara nudges her aside, dusting off her hands. "Step aside, miss priss. Watch the professional work."

Lena obeys, turning her head aside to avoid her nose brushing a very toned, very firm ass as Kara shimmied her way up and over the fence in one try. Lena's mouth goes dry at the smoothness of the motion, and the way Kara's arms strain against the slim cut of her blouse.

Kara may be an actress, but she's clearly no waif.

The woman in question grins at her from the other side of the fence. "You know, you say you're not intimidated by a silly rule, but I think there may be some subliminal hangups..."

Lena scowls. "Oh, like hell."

Boots scrabbling against the fenceposts, Lena hauls herself up through sheer willpower alone. By the time she lands on her feet on the far side, Kara has disappeared further into the garden. With a quiet curse, Lena brushes herself off and straightens her hair before trotting after her.

"Wow..." Kara breathes when Lena catches up. "It's like it's own little world in here."

Lena watches her observe the garden, noting the way her eyes sparkle in the faint light trickling in around them. The field they stand in is lush beneath their feet, and even in the dark the scent of fragrant flowers fills the air.

Kara makes her way over to a bench, and reads the inscription on. "To June, who sat on this bench every day. From John, who always sat beside her."

Lena smiles at the sentiment, and the way Kara's voice softens as she reads it. It's beautiful, and she says so.

"I guess some love does last forever," Kara remarks, half to herself. She sits on the bench, smoothing her hands across the wood as if to ask its owners for the privilege. After a moment, she notices Lena watching. "Come sit with me."

Lena does, and they spend the night with Kara's head on Lena's shoulders, looking at the stars.

---

The next night, they go on a proper date. Or at least they try to, except Lena can't find her glasses and Querl is absolutely no help in finding them, so she watches the entire movie through the prescription lenses of her snorkel mask.

Luckily, it only makes Kara laugh, even if it earns Lena a couple handfuls of popcorn in her hair from being pelted. Afterwards, Lena takes them to her favorite sushi restaurant, and makes a show of ordering in Japanese.

"Arigato gozaimasu," she finishes, handing over her menu. When she looks across the table at Kara, she's pleased to see she's impressed.

"Now how did you learn Japanese if you've never traveled?"

Lena shrugs. "I may have dated a few travelers in my day."

"Uh huh," Kara deadpans. "What else did they show you?"

Looking up, Lena lets a lascivious grin curl her lips. "Maybe I'll get to show you."

Lena revels in the fluster that marks Kara's acceptance of the sake that comes a moment later, and marks the red blush that heats under tan skin. The conversation shifts away, but continues, and Lena lets it, content with the impact she's made.

As the meal winds down, they linger a little bit, trading information they haven't shared yet.

"What's the one place you want to go, above all others?" Kara asks.

Lena sighs. "I don't know." Kara looks at her suspiciously, and Lena lifts her hands. "I could give you the same tripe I give any customer in my shop, but the truth is, the idea of travel has never really been the destination for me."

Kara looks surprised at that. "Oh?"

With a hum, Lena nods. "For me, it's always been more about who you're traveling with. And for a while there, I thought I had someone, but she never wanted to go anywhere. In the end, it turned out she just never wanted to go anywhere with me."

It still aches. Her split with Veronica had been so sudden, it split Lena's entire entire world apart. It had been bad enough to learn that Veronica had well and truly checked out of their relationship long before she ended it. To hear that Veronica had never really been in it in the first place had--

"Then she's an idiot," Kara says, bringing Lena out of her thoughts back to the present day. She reaches across the table, and links their fingers together. "And it's her loss."

Lena forces a grin. "Funnily, that's exactly what my therapist said..."

A round of raucous table from the table behind them drowns out whatever else she might have said. Glancing over, Lena registers a group of young to middle aged men in suits-- likely stock brokers, in this part of town. They were rowdy even when they came in, but now--a round of sake later-- they're downright obnoxious.

The next one who speaks doesn't bother to mind his words or his volume.

"Give me Kara Danvers any day."

Kara meets Lena's eye across the table, rolling her eyes as his buddy chimed in.

"Didn't like her last film. Fell asleep as soon as the lights went down."

"Don't care what the films like-- if it's got Kara Danvers, it's fine by me. I mean, have you seen that ass."

Lena's jaw clenches. Kara's hand slips away, as does her gaze.

"Oh hell yeah," another one continues. "And you know she's just begging for it. Never wonder how she got that gig in Dirty Dancing, did you?"

"It sure as hell wasn't because she could dance!" They all laughed. Lena shifts in her seat, blood boiling, but Kara catches her eye, shaking her head no. Too late.

Lena rises to her feet and marches to the offending table. "Excuse me, boys, but every single person in this restaurant can hear you. And while I'm perfectly happy to watch you reveal yourselves to be the absolute cunts you are, I take exception to the fact that you're talking about a very real person in the process."

The table stares at her, shocked.

"You." Lena glares at the worst offender. "Does your mother know you debase women with the same mouth you use to kiss her on the cheek? How about your girlfriend, though I find it incredibly doubtful you've managed to shag anyone with that kind of charm."

Kara tugs on Lena's arm, trying to pull her away. Lena almost goes, but turns back at the last minute, nearly colliding with the server hurrying in with the table's paid check.

"Actually, I'm not finished. Until each and every one of you learns a woman's favorite song, color and five year goal, you sure as hell don't get to wonder what flavor condom she prefers, you got it?" Her gaze lands on the platinum credit card in the ticket tray, and smirks in triumph when she sees it's a corporate card.

"And I'm sure that Lord Holdings will be thrilled to hear all about how their employees behave while they're out eating on the company's dime."

At that, the man she'd skewered a moment ago finally recovers enough to scoff. "Hah, and what do you care? What are you, her sister?"

"Actually," Kara speaks up, coming to stand beside Lena. "She's my date."

Dead silence follows as every single one of them registers who exactly is speaking. Finally, one of them tries to sputter an apology, but Kara waves it off.

"Oh, no, don't worry about it. I'm sure it was just joking between friends, just as I'm sure your dicks are the size of peanuts. Enjoy your dinner!"

With that, Kara turns away, snagging Lena's hand as she does. Allowing herself to be towed away, Lena flips them the vee and grins, then joins Kara in trotting out of the restaurant.

As soon as they hit the street they both start to cackle, drawing stares as they laugh maniacally. Lena's heart is pounding, as is Kara's, judging from the way she holds a hand against her chest.

"Oh, my god... I-- I've never done that before!" Kara laughs. "I don't know what came over me!"

"What, standing up for yourself? You're a natural!"

"No, you were amazing! I dunno, I just heard you and I saw you facing off against them all alone, and I just-- did that! I just did that!"

Kara laughs again, and Lena tugs her closer by the hips. Pressing a kiss to her lips, Lena smiles at her. "It looks good on you," she purrs. "You should do it more often."

Kara smiles back at her, rubbing her thumbs on the ridges of Lena's hips. "Maybe I will."

Lena could kiss her again, but Kara steps back, tugging them back in the direction of the hotel. "Walk me home?"

The walk back is spent in comfortable silence, but as they near the marquee of the Ritz, Lena's heart starts to pound for a whole new reason when Kara turns to her. "Wanna come up?"

Lena nods. "Yeah. I'd like that."

Kara gives a small of relief, and smiles. "Good. Give me five minutes."

The next five minutes are the longest of Lena's life. But she waits them, hands jammed into her pockets, and counts every second before finally allowing herself to head up to the room.

When she knocks, she isn't entirely sure what to expect. A robe, maybe, left open to reveal tantalzyingly firm abs. Matching lingerie, even, to match Kara's eyes.

What she doesn't expect is Kara fully clothed with panic in her eyes.

"You've got to go," Kara whispers.

Lena freezes, but keeps her smile in place. "Why?" she whispers back.

"Because my boyfriend, who was in America, is in fact here in the next room."

previous / next

[honeysorwell]

(a very unprofessional) game changer

Pairing: Audrey Tidall x fem!Reader x Diane Sherman

Summary: Audrey Tidall ends up conquering the role of the protagonist in the expected film that marks the great director and screenwriter Diane Sherman return to the film market, Run, that the blonde one desired really much. The filmmaker has only managed to return now since she left her job almost twenty years ago to take care of her daughter. She has no real plans other than finishing the film that will mark her return, but her nonpeaceful coexistence with Audrey during the filming, along with the loneliness that consumes her personal life ends up instigating an unexpected affection - and that grows every day - for Y/N, the costume designer for Run.

What Diane did not expect, when giving Y/N anonymously flowers during the recording months, is that the costume designer has been in a secret relationship for more than months with Audrey. However, the feeling of indifference and disdain that the director feels for the actress gradually dies after a heated argument between the two, leaving an unnamed tension in the air, while Y/N searches for her secret admirer with her girlfriend.

[gif by @sapphiclesbian​ ]

[gif by @cherry-jimin] 

A/N: I was extremely surprised when I posted You rush into my life, stay a little while (I know that we can have it all), and in less than a month I got +50likes (after all I barely know how to use tumblr and I discovered these days how and where to look at the followers that I have lol). And thanks to that, I will use (a very unprofessional) game changer as a social experiment, to see if you guys really like what I write, and if the answer is also positive, I will open requests to write things in my free time. And yes, my first language is not English so maybe something might sound strange.

I had this idea as soon as Run was released, thanks to Diane's passion for films... And since Audrey is an actress, I thought it would be good to combine these two...

I can say that this is a big AU because Diane is a lovely mother, and no one from Roanoke dies (because I don't have time to develop any of this shit).

Hope you all like it!

Synopsis of the story + Chapter 1 ,  Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , Chapter 4 , Chapter 5 , Chapter 6 , Chapter 7 , Chapter 8 , Chapter 9 , Chapter 10 (final one)

Chapter 1

Chapter’s summary: Audrey and Y/N get to know each other thanks to Diane, and even though they are about to start recording Run, they decide that it is worthwhile to continue with their relationship. Even if secretly.

Warnings: In this chapter at least, none. Just implicit mentions of smut, it's not really something!  

Word Count: 1,2k

In theory, when someone wins an award as important as The Saturn, their career between movies becomes more likely to invitations to productions. Films, miniseries, or even theatrical productions. But that didn't happen with Audrey.

There was a voice in her head that said it was thanks to her age. But since none of the actors in Roanoke's cast, especially women, were so different in this aspect, Audrey continued to ignore that voice.

Everything was relatively ready for the British woman to participate in Return to Roanoke: Three Days in Hell, however after her breakup with Rory, the blonde one preferred to focus on something new. She quickly fell in love with him, but when the red-haired man asked about marriage, everything was clear to Audrey. Their paths and thoughts were so different, even with the significant feeling between them, that it was better to break their love relationship before their friendship was affected. And this was what she did.

It was audacious. Refuse a proposal for the same program that gave her fame and awards, to audition for a new film that she barely knew would happen. Some people would call her crazy, but the email she received from her agent was enough to give her courage.

Or rather, four words from that email. Directed by Diane Sherman was what caught her attention and prompted her to try to venture out to take the test.

She can still remember. Years ago, while she was still fighting for a minor role in any theatrical production in England, Diane Sherman was already acclaimed worldwide for the grandiose films with unexpected endings that she produced, even at a young age.

All the films of the woman with a reddish tone between her brunette hair strands became hits. But in the midst of it all, Diane decided to take a break from her career, and less than five months later, a pregnancy was announced.

After that, twenty years passed and no film was released, no interview, no magazine cover. Such a gloriously famous woman disappeared from everyone's view with her baby. But only up to now.

That test was probably the one that tired Audrey the most in her entire career. To portray in a few minutes the pain of the life of a woman who is obsessed with her daughter to the point of making her sick was difficult. But she did, and so, while her former co-stars were locking themselves up in a seemingly haunted mansion, she was getting a call from her agent saying that she got the lead role.

Everything worked well when the blonde received her script and started working with Diane on how they would like this character to be seen by the audience, but as the conversations flowed, Audrey understood why all of the woman's films were such a success. She was a perfectionist and her authority was clear.

Everything needed to be perfect. Including the costume.

And so Audrey met Y/N. A beautiful costume designer with so much talent to spare to the world.

The first time they saw each other, Diane was not present, after all, it was just a date to take Audrey's body measurements. As the story was about a housewife, movable and comfortable clothes had to be designed, which did not force Audrey to strip naked to have her measurements known by Y/N, even if an unprofessional part of her wanted to.

Quick encounters followed, some with Diane briefly present, just to define new color palettes or to approve and disapprove something. The director never stayed more than twenty minutes with the two women, but thanks to Y/N's perseverance, in producing everything exactly as Diane wished, and Audrey's free time, due to her mind being ease in memorizing lines and just a few friendships outside England, the two woman became relatively close.

When the costumes were all designed and in the final process of being made, Diane decided that she would like Audrey's hair to be longer. Some wig tests took place, but a joint decision was made.

The film would be postponed in five months from there, so that the blonde's hair would grow.

It was frustrating, to say the least, and maybe that was the trigger for Audrey's disapproval with Diane, but one thing was good. The time now acquired has started to be spent on Y/N.

Always at discreet lunches or afternoon teas in their homes...

Y/N thinks it might be extremely inappropriate and absolutely unprofessional to get personally involved with a co-worker, even outside the set, and even though their work on Diane's film was relatively distant. But, after many glasses of wine and random conversations, nothing made more sense to Y/N than Audrey's lips against hers.

A one-night stand. That was what they thought they were born to be. But the skin on Audrey's stomach was so smooth that Y/N didn't know if she wanted to kiss her until she moaned or laughed, confused as she tried to understand which one of the sounds was the actual responsible for her heart beating faster.

A one-night stand. Because Audrey didn't feel ready to start a relationship after such a recent breakup. But there was nothing more beautiful than Y/N's face full of pleasure while she was being touched, or her face concentrated on redoing a crooked seam, even if she was the only one that noticed the defect in the piece.

A one-night stand. That turned into two, three, ten, thirty... and when they noticed, Audrey's hair was long enough for the film to start recording and their mind was unconsciously bought each other's favorite foods at the supermarket.

And on one of those nights, when they were both lying on Y/N's bed and Audrey was drawing imaginary flowers on the bare skin of her right hip, a whisper escaped the actresses lips:

"I don't want this to end because we are going to work together... Does that make me unprofessional?", The moment the question escapes her lips, she raises her face towards Y/N and looks deeply into her eyes.

"Well ...", the costume designer starts and stops, distracted by the beauty of Audrey's brown eyes and a lock of her hair - now longer - that is hindering the Y/N view of the blonde's cheeks, but that soon puts the hair strands behind her ear and continues - "Count me in because I don't want this to end either..."

It is a smile so beautiful that it takes hold of Audrey's lips, that the courage to take possession of Y / N's body and one more phrase escapes her lips.

"I think I'm in love with you."

The word think sounds so low, it's like it's not even there. Because Y/N's mind knows that she is sure, even scared and that is why Y/N's eyes focus on the whole room, except the face in front of her. Until delicate fingers touch her chin and direct her to see brown eyes bathed in tears, amid the same glorious smile of seconds ago.

"And I don't know how you didn't notice that I fell in love with you too."

And so they come to an agreement. Nothing will be explicit while they are on set. At work, they will be just friends, close friends if the distance wraps their stomachs, but still, just friends.

For the sake of their reputations, their jobs, and the Diane Sherman film they will be just friends.

[rainbowsky]

The Wolf Reviewed

Spoiler-free section

My life is divided into two eras: ‘before seeing GG as Ji Chong’ and ‘after seeing GG as Ji Chong’. I will never be the same.

GG is magical in this series, and Ji Chong is among my absolute favorite characters of all time (I am actually in love with this character, which is heartbreaking given the fact that he’s fictional). The show also has many interesting characters and some exciting storylines, and in spite of some of its flaws this series is quite good. Highly recommended.

Of course there’s a lot more to it than that, but I can’t give a full review without spoilers. Here’s the rest for those who have already seen the series.

Spoilers under the cut

OK, where to start?

The Characters

There were so many great characters in this story and overall I found the performances of all of them well-acted and exciting to watch. I especially loved Ji Chong and Yao Ji. Both were complex, mysterious characters who stole the show every time they were onscreen.

Ji Chong was incredible. Everything about him was over-the-top amazing. I can imagine that GG must have identified a lot with Ji Chong because he has a similarly gallant, charismatic and kind personality. Seeing GG perform a character like this was mind-blowing because of the harmony between them in spite of their physical differences.

I could go on and on about how much I love Ji Chong as a character but if you’ve seen the series you already know how great he is. I truly fell in love with that man. He was everything I love in a person, and in such a beautiful package. I loved his nimble mischievousness, his rebelliousness, his fierce independence, his devotion to those he loves, and above all, his integrity.  With one exception that I’ll get into later, everything he did in that series was consistent with the image I had of him and it made my heart melt.

And it was pretty insane to see GG go from the thin, twinkish, bubbly and somewhat diminutive Wei Wuxian to the rugged, masculine, mature and level-headed Ji Chong. Not only because of the personality differences between the two characters, but also because of the physical differences. They look like two entirely different people. Ji Chong looks so tall and imposing in the series!

It’s impressive to see GG’s acting ability shine through in these roles. He has such a gift for acting, and for drawing viewers into the hearts of the characters he plays.

Yao Ji was another character that really impressed me. She had so much intensity and complexity, and her character arc was so strong. She was also just incredibly well styled and she looked breathtaking in every single frame she appeared in. The various headpieces and hairstyles she wore were stunning, and her sidekick Zi Shen was an aesthetic marvel.

I also really loved Ma Jing. Despite the fact that she was often used for comedic effect, her character was quite nuanced and multidimensional. I loved her loyalty and strength, and the depth of the love she had for Ma Zhai Xing really shone through in every scene she was in.

The entire Night Fury group was also amazing. I loved them as a team and as individuals, and the trajectories their characters went through were interesting and engaging. I was really invested in what became of them. When Wen Yan died I was gutted, and I was grateful that Hai Die and Mo Xiao had such a satisfying conclusion to their story.

I also adored Butler Shi. What a great character. He reminded me of one or two guys I know hehe. He had such a warm, endearing quality about him.

I’m realizing that I could sit here and name almost every character in this series. Despite some of the problems that I have with it, I’m reminded that the characters are exceptionally well-realized in this series.

The Story

Overall I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by the story. It was exciting and engaging, and there were some very interesting side conflicts and intrigues. There was an overall sense of adventure and plenty of action, some really emotional moments and even comic relief.

When you think about it, almost every character had something deeper going on outside of the main plot, and those side/back stories were really interesting and varied. There was complexity to the characters and their motives and experiences without it overcomplicating the plot.

The romances were not my cup of tea. I’ll get into that later on. But despite being the thread that ran through the entire story, they really didn’t feel central to it and it was easy to simply enjoy the show while putting aside the annoyances I had with the romances (I did this primarily by consciously choosing to take the story at face value, and choosing to believe that Ma Zhai Xing really was through with Prince Bo).

The show did a great job of getting me engaged and keeping me interested, giving me a story that was complex without being confusing, emotional without being too sappy (with some exceptions). The action, fight scenes, battles, etc. were exciting without feeling fake and cliche. There were some well-choreographed scenes.

I really can’t complain about much. I mean, there were times when I was watching this series that I thought I hated it, but in retrospect I can see that I really loved it in spite of some of the flaws, which I’ll discuss in a moment.

The Soundtrack

The soundtrack was quite good, even if it felt repetitive when I was bingeing the show. So many songs have stuck with me since I finished the series. I especially like Backflow by Jolin Tsai (second-last song on the playlist I linked). Of course I would have loved a song or two with GG, but the soundtrack we got was memorable.

What I hated

I really struggled with some aspects of this series.

I found Bao Na mostly unwatchable. She was incredibly annoying. As a character she had all the traits I dislike. Whiny, stalker, demanding, emotionally immature, jealous... I really couldn’t stand that character for a lot of the series.

It’s true that she started to redeem herself a bit through the course of the series but she never really evolved into someone I wanted to see more of. I definitely had some moments where I liked her and sympathized with her, but mostly she grated on my nerves.

I also hated Prince Bo through most of the series, and found it insulting that I was expected to view him as the protagonist and cheer for him to win the princess’s heart. I felt that the ‘love-hate’ thing between Prince Bo and Ma Zhai Xing was overplayed to a point where I lost all sympathy with Prince Bo and desperately wanted him to die a horrible death through much of the series.

His behavior didn’t reflect someone who was in love but wanted to protect her. Much of his behavior was excessive and gratuitous, much worse than was necessary to achieve its stated goal. He was incredibly emotionally and psychologically abusive toward Ma Zhai Xing to a degree that was often really hard to watch. Especially his near-rape of her.

This is a man that I didn’t want to see redeemed. This is a man I wanted to see burned alive. No one who truly loved Ma Zhai Xing would be even remotely capable of the actions Prince Bo took.

I will admit that he did begin to redeem himself in my eyes a bit later in the series, but not to where I could ever see him with Ma Zhai Xing. I don’t think that’s the sort of treatment one can ever redeem in a relationship. He might be able to redeem himself, but not the relationship. There are some lines, once crossed between people, that one can never come back from.

I actually felt that Yao Ji was a much better match for Prince Bo than the princess was. They were true equals with similarly difficult pasts, and similarly dark deeds to redeem themselves from. They were in so many ways perfect for each other.

Ji Chong and Ma Zhai Xing were a better match because they were more natural equals in terms of personality, values and life paths. There were tremendous parallels between the two of them. Although I ended up feeling she didn’t deserve him.

So for me, it was really difficult to get invested in the love stories I was presented with. Ultimately I found them all very unsatisfying. The people I wanted to see together were treated as unsuitable for each other in ways that were completely unbelievable, and the people I was expected to want to see together had unconvincing chemistry and incompatibilities that I couldn’t overlook.

Seeing Ma Zhai Xing die in the end was an OUTRAGE. Especially when I read about the director’s rationale for that decision.

“Her thought process on killing off “Zhai Xing” was that “King Bo” had done so much for her that it was time for her to do something for him. “Her character had matured the most in the series. Dying for Wolf Boy is the best ending for this identity of hers. To me, this perfect ending is even more in line with her character’s growth.””

I found that shocking. I couldn’t disagree more with this sentiment. She wasted so much of herself and her life for Prince Bo. He treated her like crap, and he didn’t ever truly do anything to redeem himself from that behavior. He should have been the one to die.

In my opinion, REAL character growth for Ma Zhai Xing would have been to see her overcome the fixation with Wolf Boy and with Prince Bo and just move on with her life.

I will say this, though: By the time Ma Zhai Xing died in the show, her character had already been so utterly and thoroughly decimated beyond all recognition via the Prince Bo housewife trajectory that there was no point in her surviving.

The absolute worst moment for me, though, was Ji Chong ending up with Bao Na. Talk about adding insult to injury. This is the one thing that Ji Chong did as a character that ran against my understanding of him as a character.

You could have done anything at all to Ji Chong, including killing him or turning him into a villain, and it would have been less of an insult to me than putting him with Bao Na.

I do try to interpret his invitation for them to travel together in a non-romantic way (despite the fact that in the world of the show there’s no way that a princess is going to go traveling with a prince without her reputation being ruined unless they are a couple). But when I tell myself that he took her traveling to get her away from court and give her some life experience - as friends only - then it becomes less of a bitter pill to swallow. I could see him doing that for her, and I could see them developing a strong friendship through their travels.

I just can’t see them as remotely romantically compatible. Not on any level.

I found it completely unconvincing that the most emotionally mature, honorable person in the entire series who had the healthiest boundaries and a lot of worldly experience and intelligence, would have any interest whatsoever in someone as emotionally immature, childish and inexperienced (and with no boundaries whatsoever) as Bao Na.

I would have preferred it if they’d framed that whole thing as him being a sort of big brother/mentor figure to her.

I felt like I saw chemistry and compatibility between Bao Na and Fourth Prince Chu You Ze, and I would have loved to see them end up together. They were much more at an equal footing. I was expecting that to be the outcome and it would have been a sweet one. They would have made a cute couple.

Final thoughts

The romances in this story seemed fixated on unhealthy, often misogynistic power imbalances and they were really, really hard to watch. Not just in terms of Prince Bo and Ma Zhai Xing but also the ugly Ji Chong and Princess Bao Na hookup they tried to get me to swallow at the end. I hate that kind of ‘love’ story. I prefer seeing actual equals find each other in the great wide world.

However, pretty much everything else about the series was excellent. Ji Chong owns my heart and I only wish I could see more of him. GG completely blew me away and far exceeded all of my expectations.

Overall, I really love this series and will definitely be rewatching it.

[jean-does-not-have-a-horseface]

Before Dawn: Bonus Chapter (1)

Helloooooo, alright listen, I re read a choice with no regrets and uhm here is this, a little insight on what has happened a little while before our story began, I'm sure you'll want to see some nice bonding with Isabel

Warnings: just a few teeny little mentions of intercourse

@hidehaskak of course here's your tag❤️

Turtleneck

"Yehawhaww" The moment you appeared at the entrance to the roof Isabel screamed at the top of her lungs in great enthusiasm. You stood silent after you spared her a smuggling nod pacing your eyes between the two men that accompanied her, awaiting for a signal of approval. "I knew I could get you to come! You guys don't mind her hanging out with us right? She's a friend."

At that sound the males finally gave in, letting Isabel close the distance between the both of you. Her significantly smaller arms wrapped around your frame in a pure hearted childish manner and seeing that you towered over her you placed your hands on the small of her back, almost too reassuringly to the males' liking. Their unforgiving gazes burned holes in your whole body with much rage built in for ruining their fun for the night.

You knew you were practically unwanted, but it was for Isabel that you stepped foot on this rooftop to begin with. Tired of her never ending pleas to join her and her so called bros as they looked at the stars and talked about everything and anything you had decided to violate curfew and join her, not them, just her, because you wanted to share some more moments with her. This young little redhead was growing on you in the best way possible, you thought she kind of reminded you of yourself in times where you needed salvage or just a friend with whom you could share your piece of mind and heart.

She wasn't like that at first. Isabel probably resembled a rose, it occurred to you, with her godly youthful looks and her thorn like personality. It was a result from growing up in a trashhole like the underground, among thugs, being forced to build a rough personality if she wanted to survive, it was merciless for her and any other girl down there. But the bubbly side of her personality assured you she was much more than a badass teen who could hand you your ass in any fight, she had a pure heart and you longed to help her feel like she deserved post childhood experiences. But for now, it felt as if your roles had reversed. Sure, you were -if not just as her- bubbly and kind but sometimes you were frustratingly unresponsive and ill faced that it worried her until she got to know you. You hadn't put yourself in a place to talk about you trauma to her; she had her own demons and there was no point in burdening her with your abusive background, but you managed to explain to her that most of your weird and uptight behaviors, most things you could dispose of to become a better person, were curved into you in ways you could share yet. And Isabel, as respectful as ever had assured you it was fine not to be able to share.

Most girls would shut her out due to her formal nature as a thug, much like your friends who at first were adamant about discouraging you to befriend her. They had assumed she wouldn't be able to be nice and kind or to talk like them, but you were against any pretentious act behind her back. Maybe it was due to egoistical motives that you wanted to salvage this little girl, because she reminded her of you, and Nanaba, the only person who fully knew about your situation was taking a stand against this at first. She didn't want you to hurt yourself or the redhead in the process of trying to project your condition on her. But you didn't give up. With Isabel as your new bunkmate you had many chances of getting it right.

"Did you bring what I asked you to?" Isabel hurriedly asked, reaching her hands to make a quest inside the tote bag that you carried. You showed no sign of holding back as you let her peak into the cream colored bind, but only managed to cover your ear as her squeks got louder. "Thank you thank you thank you! Sit down, show me!

Isabel shooed Levi and Furlan apart, placing herself right next to the blond man while tapping her hand on her left side. You followed her smile hesitantly and proceeded to sit down to where her hand was rested a few seconds ago, next to Levi. You felt his eyes ravaging your whole form, up and down as if you were some dirty pig that seeked to rub its mud onto him. When seated neatly enough as to not touch him you proceeded to pry open your tote bag and toss a share of it insides to Isabel.

With a determined face she got a strong hold of the grey colored yarn and the pair of slightly thick needles you had managed to recover for her. "Okay show me, show me!"

"Oh what's that?" Furlan peeked his head over Isabel's shoulder to inspect of the situation.

"It's yarn and needles."

"Ahh, Furlan don't interrupt, (y/n) show me how to cast on!"

"See that's the easiest part, sweetheart." You watched Isabel coo at the support in your tone while she puckered her lips to a cute kid like pout. She followed your slow movements as if you were a goddess, showing her how to create new wolds with her strained hands.

Levi, even though he was suspicious of you, a member of Erwin's team who tried to coax her way into Isabel's life, felt somehow relieved to see that beloved expression on Isabel's face. He had overheard her once, taking to her self in the mirror, wishing she had a lady friend to spend time with and it pained him that she had a feeling of such lack inside her. Therefore your presence was a little soothing in their company. He would be lying if he said he personally didn't like it. After all he had thought you were a beautiful company to Erwin in one of the many times he had come across him in the Underground, silently watching him from the shadows. Not that he was a creep to begin with, it was just his lack and a response to the question of whether you can ever see a stranger twice, that you were actually a scout.

"Where did you learn to do this (y/n?)" Furlan was set to break off Levi's thoughts for one too many times tonight.

"Old mothers are adamant about these things, you know, good girl stuff and all."

"Oh." He began with a flirtatious tone that made both Levi and Isabel turn to him wide eyed "Good girl huh? Every Bad boys dream, including min- ah shit Isabel, ouch!"

The squint in Isabel's eyes was something that you couldn't see and you even ignored it as a matter of fact. Isabel was aware of your teeny crush on Levi, she had gotten it out of you one day during training after she had caught you gawking and drooling at him for doing the bare minimum. It was simply natural for her to get overly excited at the fact. Ever since then she had been convinced that him and you would be a perfect match, that you wouldn't have to be so uptight with him after all but you would always brush her off. It didn't torment you just get, even if his cold gaze somehow tickled your heart at certain times you were perfectly fine with hanging out around him. But there was no point in trying to convince Isabel to give up, not when she practically lived off of you and the male duo. Perhaps that was why she had squinted her eyes so hard at Farlan, she didn't want the couple in her head to be broken apart before it even started.

For the rest of your time with them you barely speak. You were fine with standing there and knitting away your project, a grey ribbed sweater that you had accidentally managed to make huge up to a certain point when you didn't find a purpose in casting off and undoing. You wondered if Isabel really wanted to knit or if it was her excuse to have you hang out with the ravenette since she had seemed to long forget about her needles and was fixated on a bottle of booze, talking away about some merchants in the underground flee market. You figured you should take your leave being to alienated to break their usual trio, you couldn't even keep up with their conversations, not that they cared to include you.

"So if you're all about playing housewife what are you doing here?" Farlan's voice calls out to you almost strained from any actual purpose, he probably knew it was kind of rude on the part to not include you after Isabel had invited you.

You remained silent for a few moments, tilting your head back to stare at the jewel decorated dark sky. Finding the right words for your purpose seemed unbelievably difficult and suffocating but it perhaps was nothing compared to their previous lifestyle.

"I didn't want to die." Two of the three almost fall to instant, bubbling laughter the moment your thoughts longer in the air as actual words.

"And you came here out of all places?" Levi sternly inquired without ever initiating some sort of eye contact.

"I wasn't top of my class, but even if I was I wouldn't go in the MP. I don't want to live a full life as a bastard you know and Garrison, let's say I have my reasons as to not going there."

Something about that bastard themed sentence caused curiosity to twitch inside Levi's chest but he didn't quest on it, oversharing wasn't in his plans to do so with a practical stranger, even if deep down you didn't exactly feel like one. He couldn't be explain that feeling but he could certainly understand what it was that made Isabel so attached to you. Something about your aura was like fresh, dripping honey, unprocessed yet sweet and endearing and overpoweringly strong to the flavor.

"You're not a bastard you had parents right? You just talked about your old mother."

Conveniently, Farlan's words allowed you to shut up and look away, further away from the former thug trio and into the vast horizon that laid before you. You contemplated what was it that enamored everyone outside the walls. With all that death, the scouts corpses that rot every where, you didn't have anything against the walls or life inside, taking down Titans and following orders was therapeutic enough to you as long as you came back to an eventual cup of milk tea and your knitting and embroidering projects. You couldn't bring yourself to give a damn about your future, but you liked fighting for the future of others, maybe somewhere there was a child, just like you, who wanted to get away from an abusive household and start a new life or pick up on experiences they had never lived. These people deserved not to feel caged inside the walls and plus, the nature of the Titans was very much appealing to you due to Erwin and his constant pep talks.

"Wait so how did you end up in Erwin's squad if you're mediocre?" Farlan pushed again, not wanting to let you stay silent for what's worth it.

"Don't forget I'm a veteran. I've outpassed the years a scout is expected to live so Erwin decided to move me to his squad, Mike insisted since we were from the same district."

"Oh so you fucked your way up huh?"

With the corner of his eye Levi watched as your eyes widened in shock. He couldn't possible know about your past, but you didn't seem the tyoe to go around and fuck your superiors so you could earn a higher rank. You were too ignorant to anything, it was prominent that you didn't care about even receiving your own room for serving well all these years.

"How dare you! As if it's something to open your legs for!" There it was, sweet confirmation that you indeed were ignorant.

"Good girl and all huh?"

"Sure."

There was something tense in the air as Farlan flirted, the subtle roll in your eyes, the unusual monotony of Isabel's voice, even Levi has seemed to bring his shoulders towards his collarbones in any attempt to distance his mind off of the unrequited nature of scenery. You weren't flirting back, momentarily he wondered if you even knew how since the sheer blush on your face betrayed your otherwise distinctive spitfire. You acted more childish than Isabel, in a way that you probably didn't realise caught Levi's attention because he didn't mind to spare you a glare, he'd rather keep it to himself.

____

Next time, it was supposed to be Farlan who approached to help you get your foot out of the muddy hole it was stuck to, Isabel squealed profanities at him, but it was Levi who had managed to push past him and the redhead, exposing his self to the cold pouring rain to run towards you. Just how stupid of your team was to leave you in the pouring rain to make your foot in your own?

His mind was at gaze as he sprint, random thoughts filling empty apathetic species that begged for overthinking to take over them. He knew Farlan didn't really like you, he was just trying to such to their plan and keeping you close was in sole purpose of getting closer to Erwin but for Isabel is want like that. She really liked your company, even he enjoyed some of your company at times and they weren't taking any chances with using you.

Moreover and much to his despise, he found himself in a very murky situation with each extension of his foot to your location. Fuck did you really have to look like that? With one leg stretched, toned bottom swaying in the air, strong veiny hands gripping on your knee, mud on the tips of your fingers and hair wet, making wild moves as you flipped your head upwards to get it out of your face. He twitched at the way a small tress stuck to your chapped lips, almost as if you were a goddess of water, a Nereid, as if you were made to be in this drenched state. Small droplets traveled from your chin down your exposed neck, hiding inside the base of your soft grey turtleneck, it was indeed a magnetising scenery, an alluring unraveling play to his eyes but he dared to rip his eyes away. He wondered if anyone could perceive this scene the way that only he did.

"Tch, try not to get that filth on me." He spoke as his sleek palms wrapped around your torso in delicate force, fitting almost perfectly. He closed his eyes. What the fuck was he even thinking? He wasn't even going to stay here for long.

"Wouldn't dream of it, but I beg of you to help before I get sick"

From a distance Isabel watched with teary eyes. A soft feeling of happiness engulfed her whole, not letting her give some form of attention to Farlan who clicked his tongue.

"Whatever Farlan, Levi is finally going to get some action for once. It's not like it's interfering with our mission!" Her brows forrowed at his sight. "He likes her, can't you see?"

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that if you don't actually tell him"

Her eyes harded at what Farlan had said. Of course, she knew Levi would deny ever laying his eyes on anyone but she wanted to be there to watch him experience falling in love, hell even falling out of it. Farlan should plainly accept that Levi is not always going to be hang up from their group. Sticking together even after their time at the military was a given, but wanting to have lovers and relationships now that they could enjoy their lives? Isabel was eagerly excited for it.

She watched you and Levi as you freed your leg from the muddy puddle, flying over by the force you had both been laboring and falling on too of each other, Levi's face was contorted in anger, fumingly red as he tried not to tell at you and she was definite about his feelings towards you.

Outside and laid with his back in the mud, Levi felt startled in a way he hadn't experienced before. He could faintly feel the tips of your breasts on his chest and he guessed you were using cloth binds since the impact wasn't enough to get him beyond a little flustered, but he could admit that this was embarrassing. He was angry, for being muddy that is, god knows just how much he despised mud and the smell of filthy rain but there was something about the way you straddled him and it touched a little flicker inside of him that told him it was alright to be muddy for a few more seconds, as long as he was underneath you. Despite his lack of experience in romantic or tense moments, he only had had sex a few times that he could count on one hand and he had despised each one for being disgustingly filthy, he definitely could sense the electric field in the air around you.

But as soon as the moment occured and you took your glistering eyes off of his, you pushed strength into your arms, digging your palms in the dirt to lift your self up and he was once again his normal self. With a click if his tongue he slipped from underneath you, denying your open hand that seeked to offer him a little help. He wasn't here for a sappy little romantic adventure, he was here to find those documents and kill Erwin, you were merely getting in the way of his brain functioning properly.

[lochrannn]

Warnings: Sexual Content (M Rating)

Characters: Lila Pitts; Diego Hargreeves; Allison Hargreeves; Klaus Hargreeves; Hargreeves Siblings (background)

Relationship: Lila Pitts/Diego Hargreeves

Roommates AU; Fake Marriage; Slow Burn; Mutual Pining; Emotional H/C

Chapter 6/?

-

Lila picks up the letter with the marriage license from the letterbox when she comes home from running some errands only a few days after they applied for it. She recognises that it’s from city hall and hesitates for a moment as it’s addressed to Diego and could honestly be anything, how would she know, but she’s desperately impatient so she decides to open the letter and just give it a cursory look and apologise for snooping through his mail later if it turns out to be something else.

As it is, in fact, the marriage license, Lila gets on the phone right away and books an appointment at the courthouse for a wedding in a week’s time, apparently managing to get a slot that just opened up again earlier in the morning, as the waiting time would otherwise have been a couple more weeks. The clerk at city hall had very kindly explained to them how to go about booking a courthouse wedding and what that would entail, otherwise Lila would have been back at square one again even with the license.

All they need to bring is their necessary documentation and a single witness. Lila really hopes Diego has someone he can ask, because she doesn’t want to get one of her coworkers to come along.

She explains this to Diego when he turns up in the evening and he doesn’t even blink at the fact that she opened the letter addressed to him and then suggests he could ask Klaus to be their witness.

“I can ask my brother to take some pictures as well, so we have them as proof for the visa proceedings.” Diego muses.

“Who, Klaus?” Lila asks a bit confused why Diego wouldn’t just refer to him by name, seeing as she’s already met him.

“No, Ben.” Diego says, a bit distracted, as he reads through the letter that she handed him.

“You have another brother?” Lila asks, surprised.

Diego gives her a blank look for a second, then says, “Uh, I have four brothers…”

“And a sister?” Lila puts together, her voice a little high in disbelief.

“Two sisters, actually… all adopted.” Diego shrugs noncommittally, “I guess we’ll have to go through all of that before the interview process.”

Lila could kick herself, because she forgot to ask him exactly what the interview could possibly entail as she’d not heard of it before Diego mentioned it back at city hall. She’s relatively certain that the image that pops into her head of her pretending to be some kind of nineteen fifties housewife in a hoop skirt and delicate curls, who has to fawn over her breadwinner husband while a government agent takes notes, is probably not exactly what they are in for.

But before she can ask about the interview this time, Diego asks tentatively, “Uhm, have you thought about what you’re gonna wear?”

Lila is sitting on the arm of the couch, Diego standing not too far away from her, very strenuously looking down at the letter in his hand. Lila crosses her arms and raises an eyebrow, but says nothing, and after a moment Diego does look at her and is immediately flustered.

“I’m not— It’s not… It’s just, if we’re taking pictures, we can’t look too shabby, but it’s also just a courthouse wedding, so we can’t look too fancy either.”

“You think I might turn up to my wedding looking shabby?” Lila asks in an even tone, but she tries very hard to give it an edge and tries even harder not to start laughing out loud at the look of panic that makes its way onto Diego’s face.

“That’s not… I didn’t mean…” he stammers, but Lila takes sympathy and interrupts him to say, not unkindly, “I have a dress I can wear.”

“Ok,” Diego says, clearly relieved that she didn’t end up getting annoyed at him again, and a tiny part of Lila is filled with a little bit of guilty regret for making him feel like he can’t say anything to her without the danger of her blowing up at him. He’s doing her a massive favour, apparently despite the fact he seems to think of her as some kind of raging bitch. It’s not like she can entirely blame him, but for some reason that thought really twists something in the pit of her stomach.

Which is odd, because she usually couldn’t give a flying toss about what people think of her.

-

In the end the day somehow arrives much sooner than she expected and Lila finds herself stepping out of her room in a short red cotton dress that hangs a little loosely off the thin straps across her shoulder but is cinched at the waist with a drawstring with a bow, and she’s put on a pair of black high heel sandals.

She hears Diego in the kitchen, so she makes her way over and when she finds him she is hit by the view of Diego in a pair of very nicely fitted grey suit trousers, a matching jacket, and what must be a black t-shirt underneath as he’s pouring himself a cup of coffee. For a second Lila can’t work out if she’s completely underdressed by comparison, or whether Diego is just wearing the heck out of his clothes, but then he notices her and gives her a once over with a strange expression.

“You look… uh… really, uhm, cute,” he says, a bit hesitantly.

“Ah shit,” Lila says, a bit frustrated, “this is way too casual… Hold on, I can take another look in my cupboard…” but Diego interrupts her. “No, Lila, honestly, you look lovely! You’re perf— It’s perfect! Not too flashy, but you look very nice, really!” Diego says in a reassuring tone and despite the fact she doesn’t quite feel like she’s actually struck the balance, she’s finding it hard not to believe him, he does sound awfully sincere.

Diego drives them to the courthouse and Lila is very intrigued by his car. It's classic Chevy and it’s a bit of a banger of a thing, but inside it smells of leather seats and very faintly of Diego’s aftershave, and Lila is weirdly comforted by that, considering her stomach is rolling with nerves. She’s not even sure why. This means nothing, they are doing this so she can get a visa and yet Lila wonders whether she’d honestly be significantly more nervous if this was her real wedding.

On their way they pick up Klaus, who is wearing a sarong and a tie dye crop top and Lila is interested to see that Diego doesn’t comment at all on the outfit, so neither does she. Then they pick up Diego’s other brother, Ben, who’s wearing a leather jacket over a hoodie, Lila can see as he approaches the car. A lot more sensibly dressed than Klaus, but still a little casual for a wedding. Then again, Lila thinks, he’s mostly only there to take the photos, so it doesn’t actually matter.

The first thing Ben does, as he climbs into the car, is make a snide comment at Klaus’s attire and Klaus shoots back with something equally insulting and after a short back and forth Diego interrupts them in annoyance, “Shut the fuck up back there, or I swear, I’m gonna pull someone off the sidewalk to be the witness, and I’m sure we can get the officiant to take a couple of pictures!”

The two brothers in the backseat take that as an invitation to have an argument amongst themselves about the ungratefulness they have to deal with and Diego rolls his eyes at them in the rearview mirror, but Lila catches the fond smile that etches it’s way across his lips and she’s quite certain that she wasn’t meant to see that. She’s glad she did.

She’s also glad that Diego has apparently told his brothers the purpose of their wedding, which means they don’t have to pretend in front of them and only need to start acting like a couple as they are called into the ceremonial office twenty minutes after their actual appointment.

The officiating judge seems harassed and in a hurry and just makes a grabbing motion as they enter. Diego catches on right away. Maybe, Lila muses, he deals with people like this all the time in his job, so he hands over all of their documents that they have compiled in one file.

The judge gives the paperwork a very thorough look, while Lila and Diego stand a little awkwardly in front of her desk.

“Okay, this all seems fine. Can I see the witness’s ID?” she says looking over the rim of her glasses at Ben.

“Oh, that’s me!” chirps Klaus and flounces over to the desk and hands the judge a passport that Lila doesn’t want to think about where he’d been keeping it on his person.

“Alright!” Says the judge and pulls a form out of a tray and starts writing their names on it in what looks, from where Lila can see it, like remarkably tidy cursive.

“Well then, are you, Diego Hargreeves, free lawfully to marry Lila Pitts?” she asks in a very official sounding voice.

Diego, much like Lila herself, must be a bit taken aback at how quickly they got to this part but rallies and says, in an unwavering voice, “I am!”

The judge turns to her and Lila swallows hard as she hears, “Are you, Lila Pitts, free lawfully to marry Diego Hargreeves?”

“I am!” Lila answers without hesitation, maybe she even sounds a bit rushed, but she hasn’t got the time to think about whether that is in any way embarrassing, because the judge just plows on, “Ok, then you sign here and here,” she points at the two gaps and Diego lets Lila go first. Then the judge says quite impatiently, “Witness?” and Klaus hurries over to put down his own name.

“Great! Then, by the power vested in me by the state, I now pronounce you husband and wife!” the judge says, reaching for a stamp and then distractedly adding, “You may kiss the bride.”

Lila watches as Diego’s eyes go wide, and she can’t blame him for that. For some incomprehensible reason she had also not thought about the fact that this might come up.

Diego looks at the judge for a second, but she’s busy sorting out their paperwork, then he looks at Lila and she gives him a half smile and a tiny shrug, because they can hardly just back out of this part now and Ben is just there with his camera at the ready, so Lila feels emboldened by the thought that this is probably really useful evidence for the immigration file, and she’s just about to reach for Diego, as his hand gently lands on the side of her face and in surprise she covers it with her own, and then his lips are softly pressing against her mouth.

She doesn’t even notice that she’s closed her eyes, but for a moment all she can focus on is the warmth of Diego’s hand on her face, the gentle breath that ghost across her cheek as he slowly breaths out of his nose, and the tension in his lips as they move gently against hers. Then he starts pulling away and a deep sense of loss settles into a spot just behind her breast bone just before Diego ever so slightly brushes his lips against hers for one more moment and then he’s gone and Lila almost over balances. She just about manages not to fall forwards and hopes nobody noticed that for a beat she turned into a swooning damsel.

Things turn into a blur then. They are dismissed hastily by the judge and then find themselves outside the courthouse. Klaus has produced a bottle of champagne and some paper cups from somewhere and Ben encourages them to pose for a few pictures in which they are toasting their newly established matrimony.

Lila downs the first cup of champagne she’s handed and immediately asks for a second and Diego gives her a slightly bewildered look, but at this point the day has been too much for her already and she no longer has the energy to feel embarrassed.

“C’mon!” Klaus then says clapping his hands together decisively, “We need to get a few more pictures of the happy couple,” and adds in a loud stage whisper, “for the whole visa things.”

Lila catches a glimpse of how Diego’s jaw tightens in response and when she looks back at Klaus there is decidedly a glint in his eye, and Lila is relatively certain that they are having some kind of unspoken communication literally over the top of her head.

Klaus glides over to stand beside Ben and in the meantime Lila suddenly feels Diego’s arm coming around the back of her and landing on her waist. But his grip is loose and he doesn’t pull her in and she’s unsure of how to go about this herself, so she fusses for a moment before putting her arm around his waist as well and then leaning into him just a bit and putting her other hand against his side.

Apparently encouraged by the fact that she’s not pulled away, Diego’s grip on her tightens and Lila makes the mistake of looking up at him, and their eyes meet and she freezes.

Diego’s eyes are impossibly soft as he’s looking back at her and for a moment Lila wonders whether that means anything. Then she slowly starts panicking as she thinks about whether she wants it to mean anything and just as Diego clears his throat and it almost seems like he wants to say something, Klaus shouts, “Lovely! And now kiss!”

Both Lila and Diego swivel round to look at Klaus but he just gives them an encouraging hand gesture, so they turn back to each other and this time a bit awkwardly press their lips against each other, noses bumping a bit uncomfortably.

It’s not a terrible kiss, Lila has had worse, but it certainly has nowhere near the effect on her that the one in the judge's office did. As she makes a little displeased noise in the back of her throat and Diego pulls away instantly with an expression that looks about as frustrated as she feels, Lila is suddently completely off kilter. In one instant she feels like she might get lost in his eyes and the next they can’t even manage an even slightly romantic kiss despite the fact they have already done so much more together.

Apparently Klaus is also not particularly impressed by their display because he says, irritation in his voice, “Are you kidding me? What was that? Come on you guys, you’re young and hot and… well… not so much unattached, but you know what I mean, you should manage a more passionate kiss than that even if it’s just for the camera! Stop kissing like you would your grandma!”

“Shut the fuck up, Klaus!” Diego growls and Lila can feel him tense next to her, but she’s too busy gaping at Klaus and asks at the same time as Diego speaks, “How the fuck do you kiss your grandma?”

“Never you mind!” Klaus grins at her with a little flick of the hand, “Anyway, we need more passion, right Benny?” he adds, elbowing his brother enthusiastically.

“I’m just the photograoher!” Ben says, raising his hands in defense, one of them still holding his camera, “But yeah that was pretty lame.”

“Fuck you both!” Diego says angrily and Lila definitely shares the sentiment but doesn’t get a chance to voice it, because all of a sudden, she’s vertical, with Diego’s arm firmly behind her back pressing her up against his chest, his other hand at the back of her knee pulling it up against his hip and he is properly kissing her this time.

Almost on autopilot, as her brain has momentarily stopped working, Lila wraps one arm around Diego’s neck, threads her other hand into his hair, and when his tongue runs along the seam of her lips, she opens her mouth and licks into his before he even gets any further. Diego makes a tiny whining noise and Lila automatically presses herself harder against him, even though she’s basically suspended in mid air with only one foot on the ground.

Then there’s a loud whoop from somewhere off to the side and as suddenly as she was tipped backwards, Diego pulls her back upright and then she’s standing unsteadily on her own, already desperately missing the sensation of pressing up against Diego’s warm, solid body and the wet heat of his mouth on hers.

-

It’s become a habit by now.

Diego will go to bed and then lie awake staring up at the ceiling for hours, trying to sort out his thoughts.

But today is particularly bad. It’s past two in the morning and he’s not slept a single minute, despite the fact he didn’t get in that late.

After the ceremony, he invited Lila, Klaus, and Ben out for lunch, mostly to thank his brothers for their help and because his stepmom had taught him how to be at least somewhat classy, so he wasn’t going to marry a girl and then not at least take her out to dinner – or lunch in this case – even if it was a sham wedding. Then he’d driven them all home and as he couldn’t afford to take a full day off, made his way back to his office in a daze.

When he got back in the evening, the apartment was already dark and he couldn’t hear any sounds coming from Lila’s room, so he assumed she’d gone to bed and almost felt guilty at how relieved he was not to bump into her.

Fuck, here he is, lying awake in bed, his wife in the other room—Jesus Christ, his wife!—and he can’t even face her.

But he just can’t work out how to be around her, now.

He has no doubt anymore about the fact that he’s in love with Lila but that realisation has almost made things worse.

For a moment, when he stupidly let himself be goaded into kissing her for the photos, he started imagining that she was kissing him back with the same fervor as he was feeling. It felt so real, he’s not even entirely sure he imagined it, but he worries that he’s just seeing what he wants to see.

He even contemplated telling her about how he feels, but that just wouldn’t be fair, even if a tiny part of him hopes that maybe there is a remote chance that she could at least feel something for him beyond friendship. But it would be so unfair on her if she didn’t reciprocate his feelings. They entered their deal under very specific terms and he can’t just go and make things awkward for her, just because he can’t handle being close to Lila without wanting to pull her in and kiss her senseless. He does wonder, though, if he maybe could talk to her about it once she has her visa, once she has options. She wouldn’t be stuck with him then and wouldn’t have to continue pretending to be in a relationship any longer.

Fuck, this is all so messed up, Diego thinks, angry with himself for not being able to keep his feelings under control better. But who is he kidding, that’s never been his strong suit.

He abandons the idea of getting any sleep, so he rolls out of bed and pulls on a pair of sweatpants and an old t-shirt and hopes that a run around the neighborhood might tire him out enough that he can maybe catch at least a little bit of sleep.

[movedkagen]

REI  TODOROKI  STUDY  /  MASTERPOST .

This is mostly ripped from discord so if it’s choppy that’s why ---

TRIGGER WARNINGS : MISOGYNY, DOMESTIC ABUSE, CHILD ABUSE, CHILDBIRTH, CHILD LOSS, GENDER DYSPHORIA.

Rei never necessarily dreamed of being a mother. She had a dream, once. She painted and has a profound natural talent for art, but her family was conservative and never entertained her getting a job. Girls like her were only good for getting married. The most rebellious thing she ever did was anonymously release a few paintings while she was engaged.

 Painting continued to be a coping mechanism when she was in the mental hospital, though they were much darker --- her paintings in there were very gruesome depictions of ... typically feminine things --- pregnancy, childbirth, housewife duties. She just painted them as very painful and bloody because that's how they felt to her and that's how she emotionally processed how she sees her own value as a woman. Obviously this isn’t too relevant in the grander scheme of things but I’m just providing some insight into Rei as a painter. 

Now before I start, I obviously don't write Rei as Black but i think about how in Black and poc cultures women are blamed for their abusive and shitty husbands.  If he hit them its because THEY made him mad, and if he cheated it's because THEY couldn't keep him/make him happy. And i write rei with those burdens. i say this bc i remember rei being on the phone like "i can't take it anymore i can't be around him i'm scared" right before she hurt shouto and i'm like ... if she did that then she must have called her mother before.  and like her mother obviously didn't tell her to leave so i hc her mother was always like "be a good wife and smooth things over, keep ur man happy, if ur household falls apart thats on u"

Rei struggled the most with Touya and fuyumi. She never hurt them or anything but she had weird behaviors around them...And her biggest crime w them was the "weak constitution" she had. With Touya she was still trying to make it work with endeavor so she kept excusing his abuse because she was trying to keep things smooth... like stupid shit like "don't make ur father upset" and "u know he has a temper". not intentional but honestly just how she was raised and she thought she was doing the right thing by avoiding conflict and keeping enji happy. She tried to protect him but honestly she didn’t resent Enji as much as she did later, with Shouto. 

With fuyumi....It’s more a personal hc but I told inad that like. Rei never wanted a daughter due to how she was raised. her family was very sexist and oppressive. She cried when fuyumi was born. she did NOT want a daughter and did not want fuyumi to be like her, a woman she perceived as weak. Because my rei KNOWS she’s weak. Her quirk may have been strong but her "constitution" emotionally was frail. But fuyumi is a child and doesn’t understand why her mom gets upset when she tries to help in the kitchen and Rei tells her to stop.

Touya has every right to resent Rei ---  unfortunately though, Abuse is usually a cycle… I hced Rei dealt with a lot of mental and emotional abuse from her parents, her mother especially. that's how rei's family was. and in my hc quirk marriage is just a revamped arranged marriage. like quirk marriages in and of themselves are not evil like it's just. a cultural practice basically. but rei's family w endeavor........... her abuse was most prominently her own mother, They were VERY conservative, Very “the woman should serve the man” type people. endeavor was looking for someone with the right quirk so like. It’s reasonable to think that rei’s quirk had potential to be as strong as endeavor’s, just with ice. Yet she NEVER became a pro-hero? I think it’s because her parents never even considered it. Her taking an active duty job would have been disgraceful.

And culturally, most arranged marriages are agreements. i don't think Enji stomped in and kidnapped rei. There was an agreement. He was young, too. Like. Rei probably got married at like 18-19...he was no. 2 by 20. He was so driven to be no. 1. He is 46 now, and fuyumi is 23. like he's been grinding his whole career.

So if touya’s older, they had him basically right when they got married. The kids are all about four years apart so it’s probable that he basically had a kid, waited for the quirk to manifest, and then would have another...and fuyumi is the ONLY one who doesn't have that 4 yr age gap. she's closer to touya's age than the other gaps. SO I hc Touya And fuyumi r closer in age like that Bc Touya was supposed to be the Child who Succeeded. his fire quirk WAS strong. and therefore fuyumi was actually just. a planned child. because at that time their marriage wasn't complete shit it was like. something rei was optimistic abt.

for anyone who’s seen game of thrones,  there's one scene where sb accuses cersei of hating the king and she talks almost wistfully about how she was so excited to marry him bc of how strong and famous he was and she was so nervous on her wedding night but then stannis stumbled in drunk and came in 2 minutes and said another woman's name and she quickly became disillusioned by the idea of her whole marriage. I compare Rei’s view on her marriage to that scene.

she agreed to marry endeavor and he was a desirable bachelor @ that point. she was excited to try and get to know him and "be a good wife" to him but. his focus on work was always first. and rei, raised how she was and trying to make things work how she was, did her best to maintain what she thought a good home was for HIM. to keep HIM happy. i don't actually think he started out smacking everyone around. i think physically, touya rei and shouto were the people he abused while natsuo and fuyumi never got that.

he was training touya and fuyumi was planned and that was the only "happy" part of the marriage

it was when touya started “failing” that the things got ugly. I think fuyumi has memories of the family being functional and happy because at the beginning they WERE ... they were functional and did things together and acted like a nuclear family. through a child’s perception, that’s what she wanted to go back to.

Anyways, Rei Met enji. And like., She ofc didn’t love him but she at least kind of liked him as a person. When a man like that comes and asks to marry your daughter it’s not some ogre carrying her off, he was a desirable bachelor & her parents LEAPT at it.

 Rei was hopeful @ first. She thought "he’s handsome and strong maybe this will be a good marriage". She romanticized him a little bit. She kept thinking about being “good enough” for him. She kept giving him children, cleaning the house, being subservient because she was taught that those things made a good wife. she tried to be a good wife. 

 every time he got angry or distant she just blamed herself. what did SHE do to upset him. what did SHE do that didn't make him happy enough. 

 Endeavor didn’t hit her until shouto in my hc ... I think w shouto he just seriously lost his mind bc 3 kids in and no perceived progress. But up until that point, every time he got angry or distant Rei blamed herself. Every time he didn’t want to look at natsuo or called Touya a failure she blamed herself. And like. That fantasy was falling apart.

A resentment started brewing. She was starting to really resent her husband to the point where Touya being so similar to him made her uncomfortable. i do hc that at the time touya looked the most like him / had a temper (obviously we know him being angry would be him lashing out bc he was abused, i'm not saying his temper is wrong or bad). And fuyumi was so similar to HER I think being around her made her sad. I don’t think rei was weak and a pushover at the beginning....She was trying her best and by the very end she was tired

Now going into when she had her youngest child. All the other children disappointed enji and by default were  rei’s “failures”. She didn't give him good enough children to make him happy. That was HER fault. She loved her children of course, but being a victim of abuse from her own family would sometimes get distant from them. Rei has very said, distant eyes. she's always been that way.

Whenever enji yelled at them (I don’t think he hit them @ that point in time) she would make excuses for him.  

Touya and her were developing a strained relationship bc she’d ask the wrong questions and say the wrong things... “You shouldn’t have made your father mad” and things like that in response to his abuse because in her head smoothing things over is still the best approach. She wasn’t trying to hurt him, she just...wasn’t thinking rationally. She thought she was, but she was speaking from a place of abuse herself. She was taught to keep her head down.

When Touya would get angry he’d look so much like enji she’d visibly flinch away from his yelling. It strained their relationship. Like you know how you can’t take it out on the person who makes you angry so you take it out on someone else? like that. again, 100% wrong on rei's part. she made mistakes and tried too hard to please enji. She lowkey put her fear of enji into Touya as he got older. Tried not to show it but it was so clear he made her uncomfortable. And Fuyumi. She kept thinking fuyumi was gonna end up just like her and hated that.

there's distance with both of them because of those feelings. Then she has shouto and like. He’s her whole world. He’s nothing like her or enji and he’s sweet and he thinks the world of rei...Rei ADORED shouto. Natsuo was also very close with rei because endeavor straight up ignored him.

 And the shit starts where he wants to train shouto and she’s trying to stop him. She wants to put her foot down. She doesn’t want him to take her baby and make him like himself. She couldn’t protect Touya, but she won’t let the same thing happen to shouto. SHe starts being defiant. The fighting starts, the hitting starts. 

And you remember how right before she burns him she was on the phone with her family? Saying “I can’t take this anymore” over and over...She wanted to leave. That HAS to mean she has called them before which means this entire time every time she had a problem she probably called her mother or something for advice. And like. I’m sure. SURE Her mother was always on the other end telling her to smooth things over. To fix it. To make it right. To be a good wife. Insinuating she was a bad one for having problems in her house.

Which is why rei never left, She didn’t think to. It never crossed her mind outside of being some silly intrusive thought she’d never entertain... She had mental health issues for years, Anxiety and depression that went unchecked and developed into a schizoaffective disorder. She didn’t hear voices but she would just develop this severe irrational paranoia. and it all came to a head when she burned shouto.

when she got to the mental hospital I don’t think she took it well at all, I think she got there and kept insisting she was fine, was in denial that she was sick. I think she kept screaming and begging enji not to take her kids from her. I think she tried refusing medications, Pocketing pills, Hiding shit. Thinking she didn’t need help, she’s not crazy! Trying to leave and walk out. Her first year there was hard because they had to restrain her, give her injections. The whole ordeal.

She was very resistant to care at first. I also hc like. She’s clearly fine and having worked in a mental hospital before a lot of people ARE fine while they’re there but they’re so scared of integrating back into society they just don’t want to leave. She's not so mentally unwell she needs to be inpatient for 10 years that's just. not realistic. She could have been discharged earlier, but she didn’t wanna go back home. She was afraid to live in the real world again. So she stayed of her own choice there.

REI DOESN’T WANT TO LIVE IN THE HOUSE ENJI BUILT. In fact, when she gets out, she sees natsuo and fuyumi argue about who is going to live with her (to take care of her) and rei just quietly says she’s decided not to live with either of them. She loves her kids, she wants to have a place in their lives again somehow, but she’s also ashamed of how Fuyumi, Natsuo, and Shouto all think they have to “save” her. She’s lost all the years to raise them, but if there’s one more thing she can do for them as a mother, it’s stand up on her own two feet and not burden them any more than she already has. She tells them that she’s sorry for being weak, but that she wants things to be different. And because of that, she says she’s gonna live in a group home for women until she can get a job and get her own place. She has help from the hospital and she’s going to use those resources. 

The kids try to dispute it, but Rei won’t budge. She knows she failed them as a mother and knows she can’t change her weakness in her past, but she refuses to do that to them any longer. She isn’t a fool --- she knows it will make an already hard transition that much harder, but all she’s ever been is someone’s daughter. someone’s sister. someone’s wife. someone’s mother.

For the first time in her life, she wants to be Rei. 

[miss-inkwell]

So I thought someone should write this so I decided to do it a post on Archie and Betty from the comics and how that relates to the show.

Archie Comics Archie and Betty

Archie himself was ‘nice’ clumsy outgoing boy next door who was dating two girls Betty and Veronica.

Betty Cooper

In the comics Betty is obsessed with Archie. She wants to do whatever Archie wants as long as she’s with him. This includes things like fixing his car, cooking for him or helping with his homework. From what I’ve read usually Betty is the second choice for Archie because he normally decides to date her if Veronica isn’t available. Even in Betty’s dreams she sees Veronica take Archie from her every time.

Exhibit A:

Stuff like this makes me sad for Betty because it seems like she’s putting a lot of her self-worth in her relationship with Archie. If they ever did get together she would be more of a housewife than a girlfriend which is exactly what she would be if she got together with him in Riverdale.

In season one of Riverdale she expressed during their dance that she had a fantasy of them being together which is the problem she likes the idea of them together. I don’t think that’s right because if you want to be in a relationship with someone you should like them for who they are not a made up version. If Betty were to be with Archie she would conform to being a housewife she wouldn’t be her own person and Archie and her wouldn’t really have anything in common.

Betty in the comics honestly wasn’t a bad person she did some not so nice things to get Archie’s attention but she cared for others was a good friend. Her obsession with Archie was the most concerning and left her distracted she was literally overjoyed when Archie did something as simple as kiss her for fixing his car, a car he used to take Veronica out.

If they ever put an emphasis on Betty being sick of being the second choice from what I’ve seen it ends with her actually getting a date with him or her failing somehow. Since Betty often dreams or daydreams about Archie or life with Archie as a fairytale or her just doing everything for him that’s something she needs to see a psychologist about.

Why does Betty keep dreaming about Archie choosing Veronica and her just doing his grunt work?

Because she knows it’s the truth and that’s her life but she doesn’t care. She doesn’t care because as long as it’s them in the end with her fantasies she’s happy.

Betty has honestly always had better options Jughead for one who honestly was never that big a fan of women in general but always had a soft spot for Betty (and her baking) and from what I’ve seen always helps her when Veronica does something to her.

In this strip he buys her flowers and has Archie deliver them to say that it’s from the kids Tv show guy Wise Willie Waldo to make her feel better.

We occasionally see Betty go out on dates with other men I remember one strip where she went on a date with a guy but the entire time all she could talk about was Archie I felt bad for the poor guy because he was really into her and was still gentlemenly even though he was clearly annoyed.

Exhibit B: (sorry couldn’t find the comic for it)

She had a daydream about her and Archie being puppies and basically during it she’s digging his bones and when he gets dog napped and she saves him yet he still goes off with puppy Veronica. It always needs to take her physically yanking Archie her way for him to really notice her because as soon as Veronica appears he forgets about Betty daydream or not she knows this. Also just like irl and her daydream she was doing work for him she’s constantly treated like a dog and I don’t think she’s fully ok with it but she forgets all about her treatment when she’s with Archie and that’s not ok.

Archie Andrews

There’s honestly not much to say about comics Archie other than he’s a player who’s relatively nice to other people but doesn’t treat the women that he’s dating with that kindness. He never has a lot of money on him because he’s always spending money on Veronica so he never has money to date Betty so she always has to pay he’s very clumsy unreliable since he cancels dates a lot and forgets important things like anniversaries. He may always be broke because of Veronica but he honestly could do more to prevent that maybe save up, get a job, plan dates that don’t require a lot of money.

One time he forgot his anniversary with Veronica and made a date with Betty that day and actually thought he could wear the shirt she gave him on his date with Betty and then bought Veronica second hand dress that he thought was good enough.

Archie thinks he can have his cake and eat it too because dating Veronica full time is expensive and dating Betty is good for what he provides for yet he still enjoys her company but doesn’t really treat her all that great. Only dating her when Veronica isn’t available is not right. He sees her as an option to date and as a buddy he can rely on.

Archie treats Betty like a dog and plays her like a fiddle and she falls for it every time. Veronica treats Archie like a dog as well so she is at no risk of being housewife because she never has the fantasy and he follows her.

In conclusion

Betty and Veronica both deserve better in the comics and the show. Betty already has someone better and wonderful Jughead who treats her like the queen she is and they have so much in common plus they work because they build each other up.

Veronica deserves more than someone who’ll do her bidding or someone who doesn’t always put her first. Archie may favour Veronica but Veronica deserves someone who’ll only look at her someone who respects her but at the same time challenges her. She deserves someone who she’ll fight for and vice versa. Mutual trust, respect, loving honour and loyalty just to name a few. Veronica deserves someone who she sees as her best friend and love of her life not her lap dog who will always be in the doghouse.

It makes no sense for Betty to go back to Archie because she’s been so happy with Jughead and has no reason to want to be with Archie.

From the beginning she’s been treated with love and respect from Jughead not to mention having an individual in her life that gets her and loves her for who she is and everything about their relationship is wonderful.

Having Barchie be a thing would be throwing all of that away for a fantasy that’s actually quite dangerous because she would be losing her own self in the process.

Did I miss anything important? Did I repeat myself too much?

Feel free to add anything I love feedback and opinions from the fandom.

Special thanks to @stonerbughead for her help