#kamisato ayato angst

[chilumi-shipper]

Crowned Flowers

Kamisato Ayato x Fem!Reader (Royal AU)

Summary: He's the Crowned Prince and you're just a commoner. You love each other but you had to keep your relationship a secret. Knowing it was the best to leave him alone and not make his life harder, you avoided him and no longer visited the castle. After years of pining for his first and only love, he is met with the sight of a little boy identical to him.

Warning: Slight Smut nothing intense

Tags: Slight Angst to Fluff, Royalty x Commoner

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

The young prince Ayato wasn't aware that such a cheap flower could bring about such beauty, yet a crown made of those cheap flowers laid on the head of a maiden he found strikingly admirable, he couldn't keep his eyes off you.

You were trying to catch the attention of other people around you, offering them a look of your basket of flowers, perhaps hoping that the flowers would be of interest to some people, and thus buy it off you.

"Sir..." The blue haired prince was shaken out of his trances, realizing that you had made your way over to him. You smiled at him with all the joy in your possibly pure heart. "Would you like to buy a flower? They're really pretty."

You didn't recognize him, probably because of his thick robe, covering the unmistakable blue hue of the hair of the royal family.

"Ahhh- Umm..." Ayato patted himself, looking for some mora to give you, but all his expenses are handled by his retainers, so he doesn't have anything on him. "I-I apologize, I don't seem to have any-"

You held up a flower for him still, "That's okay! I want you to take one for free! My mama said that giving something nice to others brightens up their day, and you can make good friends!"

He took the flowers in his hands, and never has the young prince felt so grateful for something so small.

Nobody knows why King Ayato's favorite flower is a cheap, white petaled flower that can be seen all over the kingdom. Surely someone of his status would love a rare, exotic flower only someone as rich as him could gaze upon.

But the sight of the beautiful flower reminded him of the love he unfortunately couldn't keep in his arms. The love that remained embedded in his being, never letting him forget the face that brought upon color in his world, the hands that cradles his face and caress his cheeks ever so softly, the body that he forever wants to hold close to his own, though he probably could never again.

The crowned king Ayato could only reminisce about the love of his life.

"The young prince is missing again!" Yelled one of his guards, his voice laced with worry, less for the prince and more for himself if he doesn't bring the prince back to the palace immediately.

The panicked guard yelling for help at the other guards drew a little giggle from you, making you cover your mouth to avoid making too much noise. You were hiding behind the tall fence of the local orphanage, Ayato next to you sitting close, trying not to laugh as well.

"Looks like we got some time for ourselves." He whispered, his face awfully close to yours. You smiled brightly, as you usually do, cuddling up to him.

"Your parents might kill you..." You rest your head on his shoulder, prompting him to wrap an arm around you. You sighed in contentment, hearing the fading frantic footsteps of the guards.

"I don't think I mind having this as my final moment before my parents kill me." You playfully slapped him on the chest due to his statement.

Ayato then had a thought, "Maybe... they wouldn't be disapproving of our relationship like we thought." He tightened his hold of you. ''Perhaps, we can finally-"

"It's unheard of, couples like us." You spoke sadly, sighing after. "It's only in those teenage fanfiction books does the commoner get the prince."

Ayato didn't want to admit that you were right, there was a low chance that his parents would allow him to marry a commoner, much less would the royal court.

He chose to end the topic with a joke. "Well then, I hope the writer of this story knows the decorations I want for our wedding." He basked in the smile that your lips formed.

As the king of his kingdom, he was expected to produce an heir to the throne within the first five years of his reign, yet he had not stuck to this expectation, he had not even chosen a bride.

It feels as though his heart is tied to only one, and no other lady could capture him in a loving blanket of eternal bliss in which you caged him in.

And no other could satisfy the hunger that you satiated during your first (and last) night together.

"I still wish to see you after this..." He says in a breathless moan, his hand landing on your hips as you grind yourself closer to him. "Archons, my queen..." He hisses, shutting his eyes at your moves above him sending him to absolute euphoria.

Your fingers poked at his cheek before your palm made contact, caressing it to opt him to open his eyes. You smile softly at him, "You have a duty..."

In the dim light of the moon illuminating from the windows of his room, you looked absolutely radiant, completely naked for him to devour with his eyes. His hips instinctively jerked up at the sight, making you whimper at the sudden sensation.

"I have a duty to the woman I love..." His own hand reach for your face, cupping your cheek. "I fucking love you..."

He had never felt such raw and intense emotions, but being bare and romantic with you within the warmth of his abode, showered by the cascading light of the moon truly made him love you even more.

You lean into his touch, closing your eyes as you start to move on his lap, letting him caress your insides. "I love you, I love you too..." You whispered, letting it mix with the moans that leaves your mouth.

After your intense, romantic, sweet love-making, you left his life with one last kiss to remember him by.

He's never seen you since then.

Sometimes he even thinks that you were just a figment of his imagination, his version of perfection within a girl that he would hopelessly fall in love with for the rest of his life.

But, as he stares at the scene in front of him...

"Flowers! Fresh flowers here! So pretty, it'll make you fall in love!"

...that young boy, selling white flowers in a somewhat familiar, worn-out basket, hair covered with a cloak, but his eyes... that unmistakable tint of purple that only one member of the royal family has.

His heart then drops, as the door of the house behind the little boy opens, revealing... you.

You... 're so beautiful...

A version of perfection within a girl that he would hopelessly fall in love with for the rest of his life.

"Your Majesty, the royal guards are done with their business here, we may go if you would allow us." A guard stood beside him, unbeknownst to the conflicting feeling swirling within the king.

"Yes, go..." Ayato refuses to take his eyes off the scene in front of him.

"And you, your Majest-" The guard could not finish his question before Ayato was walking up to the boy holding the basket.

"Sir with the crown! You want flowers, right?" As their gazes meet, the purple-eyed boy pointed at him and shouted excitedly.

Ayato chuckled, taking out a pouch of mora from his suit and kneeling down to the boys level. "Would this suffice for one lovely flower?"

"Wow! That's for a whole basket!"

"You can have it, I've been thought that giving something nice to others brightens up their day, and you can make good friends."

"My mommy says that!" As the boy exclaims, a figure walks up behind him, opting Ayato to look up.

"I know she does..." Though he is filled with conflicting emotions, he still smiles at you. "My queen says that."

"Is mommy your queen, Mr. Crown?"

Your eyes lock onto his, your gaze softening. "King Ayato... I'm sorry for my child..." His eyes seem to darken as you refer to your son as only yours.

Ayato gently places a hand on the little boys hood, lifting it off a little to reveal the same shade of blue hair as his. "Hmm... a very handsome young prince..."

The boy silently tugs at your skirt. "We're secretly royalty, mommy." He giggles, making his father smile.

"Yes, nobody would go against a king for declaring his beloved as a royal, to be by his side. " Ayato smiles proudly.

For the longest time in his life, he had always wanted to just hold you without worrying about the eyes of the public, and as he shamelessly holds out a hand to cup your cheek, he has fulfilled one of his many wishes.

"You can run from a crowned prince, but not a king, my queen." He pulls you in for a kiss, and despite to nosy eyes of your neighbors, you let him.

And you don't have to run away again.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

The little boy is unnamed, cuz I suck with names, so comment what you would name your little love child with Ayato!

Also, I found this in my drafts, it was like from a year ago and I read it and I can't believe it's so... beautifully written?? (not tutting my own horn, I was just truly impressed that I could come up with this, I mean, you guys read my smuts >:)) Anywayyy, hope you like it!

[mustangbby]

How about blind!reader with genshin men (you can choose) and she accidentally slipped and somehow managed to mess up genshin man’s important work and he ends up blowing up on her? Angst please and I don’t mind if you do comfort or no comfort!!

Have a great day🌚

-> blinded mistakes

synopsis -> you're blind, and you accidentally knock over a months worth of your husbands work, and it gets ruined.

warnings -> super angsty!!! brief mentions of ayato putting his hands on reader (no hitting or anything) might do a part 2 for comfort part cus i wanted to focus on the main argument w this one...

a/n -> ooooooomg i'm a sucker for these tropes i love angst so much. thx for ur request, this was sm fun to write! 💗💗

w/c -> 1.1k

-> ayato

ayato knew you were blind, and he was as understanding of it as he possibly could be.

but in times like these, where all of this work was to be turned in for city matters by next week, he had no patience for anyone.

he had been cooped up in his office for a while at a time over the past month. these documents were incredibly important to him and how the words written on the paper could impact how festivities were held to be a much easier way for himself and the city. 

basically, his papers were pretty damn important. and you knew that.

you walked in his office one day with thoma helping you through the hallways. you didn’t want to trip, especially with a mug of tea in your hand, and you didn’t want to bring a cane with you. 

but, thoma may have made a big mistake of leaving you in ayatos care as soon as you walked through the door. because you knew ayato was in no way shape or form able to draw himself from his work at the moment.

you were not able to use your cane to feel around the room, so without knowing where the rug was, you tripped.

and the tea you held in your hands went all over his desk, soaking his documents. the ink was splotchy and obviously ruined. you weren’t able to see what happened, but by the way ayato gasped and grabbed your wrist you knew you fucked up pretty bad.

“what the hell were you thinking???” he pulls you up forcefully and pushes you down on his couch, where you started tearing up. you weren’t necessarily used to him yelling at you, for arguments, especially over such as this, were very minimal. he always found a way to come to an understanding with you, no matter what you may have ruined. 

“i’m sorry! i didn’t think thoma was just going to leave-” you were cut off by an angry voice.

“this isn’t thomas issue, y/n. it’s yours. how clueless can you be?” he brings his hands to his face, rubbing the bridge of his nose before groaning loudly. 

“i’m sorry that i can’t fucking see, ayato!” you yelled back, slamming your hands on the couch and leaning back. “is that what you wanted to hear?”

he shook his head, but you didn’t know that. he lays his hands on your thighs, squeezing them, before getting close to your face. you could smell his hair, the sakura shampoo he uses being evident. 

“i don’t want a fucking apology, y/n. if these documents are not in by friday, there is no change for inazuma. the change you’ve been awaiting, the change i’ve been awaiting, and the change everyone of the city has been awaiting. you took that away from all of them. because you decided you weren’t going to bring your cane to make sure you don’t fucking fall!” he yells to your face, making the tears spill out.

“i’m sorry! i just wanted to bring you something to drink because i was told you were overworking yourself. gosh, how bad of me for caring for my husband,” you yelled, hands shaking in both fear and rage. you knew talking back to him this way wouldn’t lead to anything good, but you tested your luck anyways.

“remove yourself from my office. i don’t care how the fuck you do it, but i demand you leave,” he said with a low, threatening tone. you knew he was enraged, and you stumbled through the door to the hallway, where ayaka was waiting to take you back to your room.

-> wriothesley

you always felt grateful for wriothesley, and the last thing you wanted to do was to upset him. he was one of the only people to look past your disability and see your heart, see your kindness and purity. 

so when you come up his office stairs very, very slowly with a cup of tea and trip on an uneven plate in the ground, ruining his documents that were incredibly important to him and the palais mermonia, especially to neuvillette, you knew you were screwed.

normally, this didn’t happen. he’d meet you down by his office door after a guard or sigewinne escorted you through the fortress, and help you walk up the stairs with the support of his arm.

he immediately slams his hands down on his table, walking over to where you were. 

you felt his presence looming over you, though unable to see it, you slowly and carefully sit up. he lifts up your chin before speaking.

“why. why would you do that,” he starts in a low tone, something similar he’d use to speaking to misbehaved criminals. “i told you not to visit me today. and what do you do? the complete fucking opposite!” 

you rub your eyes, trying to show no signs of weakness. you stand up, and he grabs your hands, making you feel the mess you made. ripped papers, bleeding ink. a month of progress is officially gone. 

“you feel what you did? that has taken me months! and it’s ruined! if i lose my job because of this-” he starts, dropping your hands as you turn around, your bottom leaning against the desk. 

“i’m sorry! i should’ve either stayed home or have a guard escort me up, i didn’t mean to ruin your progress!” you wipe more tears away, hearing him give an annoyed sigh. 

“you’re right. you shouldn’t have come at all. this would never have happened if you didn’t come. do you understand how much trouble i could be in? if you didn’t visit me at all, i wouldn’t have to go through the embarrassment of asking for new documents, and i wouldn’t have to do hundreds of papers in three damned days!” he says, obviously distressed.

“look, i’m sorry, okay?! you can tell neuvillette and all of fontaine that i was the one who ruined everything if you want to! i’m sorry about the hassle and i’m sorry for putting more stress on you! all i wanted to do was bring you a cup of tea because you left the house stressed this morning!” you yelled back, crying at this point. “if you don’t want the embarrassment, then you can embarrass me. it seems like i’ve done enough to deserve it, so do it! tell the whole world what i did wrong, and how horrible of a wife i was!”

you called a guard in to escort you out, and that was the last wriothesley had seen of you that day.

[himasgod]

ANGST Ayato Kamisato x Reader I

At the end of the day, you will never be his priority.

(part II is already published!)

In the dim light of the Kamisato Estate, silence reigned with an unbearable weight. The moonlight timidly filtered through the windows, barely illuminating the figure of Kamisato Ayato, sitting at his messy desk. All around him, official documents piled up, completely ignored. From the darkest corner of the room, you watched him, noticing how his usual calm and calculating demeanor slowly crumbled.

"You should rest," you said softly, knowing it was useless. You had learned, after so many years at his side, that Kamisato Ayato was not a man who allowed himself the luxury of resting when there were problems to be solved.

Without even looking up from the papers, Ayato let out a silent sigh. "The Kamisato clan cannot afford to rest," he replied, his voice low but firm. You knew what those words implied. The weight of the clan, the pressure of the shogunate, and the responsibility of maintaining the stability of the Yashiro Commission crushed him. And in that context, you were barely a shadow in his life.

You approached slowly, trying to find a way to reach him. But as you placed your hand on his shoulder, Ayato tensed, pulling away from your touch as if it were a reminder of something he couldn’t afford to have. You knew he loved you; you saw it in the brief glances you shared in stolen moments, in the way his voice softened when he spoke to you. But that wasn’t enough for him. Ayato had always prioritized his duty, and you… you were just a distraction in his life full of obligations.

“You know you can’t keep going like this,” you whispered, your voice cracking. But he wouldn’t look at you. Commissioner Yashiro could never show weakness, not even in front of you.

“I can’t stop now,” he replied, his tone sharp as a sword. “The clan needs stability. My sister, my people… It all depends on me.”

The mention of Ayaka made your heart ache. You had seen the devotion Ayato felt for his sister, and you understood it. But it also made you realize that, try as you might, you could never really take a place in his life. Not in the way you needed. He was wedded to his duty, and you were just a footnote in his complicated story.

“And what about me?” Finally, the words you had been afraid to say slipped from your lips. A deathly silence fell over the room. Ayato’s eyes, cold and calculating, rose to look at you, but there was no immediate response. Silence was your only answer.

“You can’t just cast me aside forever,” you whispered. “I’m not a burden you can just shrug off whenever it suits you. I’m not one of those political problems you can solve with a strategy.”

Ayato stood up then, walking towards you, but the distance between you was still overwhelming. He stopped in front of you, his usual calm expression unwavering. But in his eyes, in those blue eyes like the water of a calm lake, you could see the torment he carried within.

“It’s not that simple,” he murmured, his voice low and filled with a sadness he rarely showed. “You know I love you, but… I can’t give up my responsibility. Inazuma needs peace. And the Kamisato clan… needs me to be here. Always.”

“And what about me?” you repeated, tears beginning to fill your eyes. “How much longer do you plan to keep me waiting, Ayato?”

A long silence followed your words. In the end, he simply looked away. “I don’t know how long. Maybe forever.”

It was as if those words struck you in the soul. The truth was clear: in Kamisato Ayato’s life, you would always be secondary. The love you shared was real, but not strong enough to overcome the weight of his destiny.

And then you knew: you would never be his priority

Here is my masterlist, in case you are interested in any more of my work or want to send me a request <3

[dark-night-hero]

Imagine sitting next to each other a meter away from each other as the two of you surrounded with nothing but silence as you two watch as dawn came upon he horizon.

"Have you ever wonder?"

"Wonder about what?"

"What we could have been if you aren't the Head of the Kamisato Clan."

Imagine the return of silence. Only the sound of the breeze came upon that makes you look away from the horizon into the guy right beside you. He was always like that. So close yet so far away. Someone within reach but you do not dare reach out.

Imagine the way you turn to look at the horizon, the sun was starting to emerge, painting the endless sea into warm colors as the day starts.

"I used to think about it alot. But I don't do that nowadays. There is no used thinking about the what ifs."

"I see." You chuckle.

"The sun is rising. I need to get going now, My lord"

Imagine as you were about to stand up, a hand grab your wirst. It was Kamisato Ayato looking at you, holding you tightly yet gently. As if if you were to brush his hands off away from yours, he would not hesitate to let go. Letting you know how easily he could and have already let you go.

"Anything else, My lord?"

"Can you stay...? Until the sun rises... Just until the sun rises..."

"... You're cruel until the very end... aren't you?" You spoke, not missing the pained look in his eyes that disappeared in a blink on an eye.

"Fine, just until the sun rises."

Imagine, they say that sun rises was a sign of new beginning, a new day. Perhaps it was right, painfully right as the two of you has now gone through different ways.

Imagine, looking at the sun that has rise from the horizon, a small, beautiful yet painful smile makes it's way on your lips as you stood up. Brushing off the invisible dirty on your clothes, you smoothen it out before turning your back on the man you loved, still love.

"(First name). Write me a letter once you arrived... okay?" Why does it sound like he was about to cry?

"...I.." With a deep breath and a clear of throat as you tried to hold on into every bit of your emotions.

"It's quite early, but congratulations on your marriage soon to happened, My lord."

Imagine, if only you looked back. If only you had the courage to look back. You would have seen how lonely he have become upon your departure. You would have seen how he was begging of you to stay as selfish as it may have seen. Because let's face it. You are whom he loves, but not the one he needed for the sake of his Clan.

[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2023°

: wtf happened? I should have just gone to sleep.

[thebomb-thebird-andtheburntbitch]

Wishing On Golden Stars [INDEX]

k.ayato/fem!reader

genre: isekai, slow burn, fluff, hurt/comfort, humor(?), series

general warning(s)!!!: this is NOT a yandere!isekai/SAGAU, characters/reader not-insane confirmed, imposter syndrome/identity placement struggles, dashes of insecurities, canonverse violence/combat

a/n: this is a prewritten series! all parts of the story are already written in a master draft and will be edited/released in parts on a schedule. this way i wont have to let another wip series die. i didn't intend to let this fic get so out of hand but uhhh, here we are. lets just chalk it up to world building and bonding c:

SYNOPSIS: what's a girl who just wanted to enjoy the banner of one Kamisato Ayato to do when she finds herself waking up not at the computer desk she fell asleep on, but instead outside on an unfamiliar pier? furthermore, waking up with armored spearmen threatening her?! being taking in by the Kamisato's is a blessing that kept you out of prison, but how can you expect yourself to survive in a world you just found yourself in with all the knowledge from reality residing in your mind? on top of trying to ignore your feelings for the Yashiro Commissioner himself? inazuma was not the place to be.

CHAPTERS:

Welcome to Teyvat [4k]

Intertwined Fate and the Yashiro Commission [4.4k]

Allow Me to Introduce... [4.2k]

Home [4.5k]

Anxiety of Illness [6.3k]

His Name [2.6k]

Before the Meteor Shower [4.1k]

Seeking Advice - COMING SOON! [Dec. 22]

…loading… [FINAL]

a/n pt.2: the finished draft for this series turned out to be 37k words long, so the process of editing it/making changes may melt my brain. but i'm determined to make it work. still haven't decided the lengths of each chapter, so bear with me bc they probably wont stay consistent whoops

[tb3ih]

BEHIND CLOSED DOORS (pt. 1), ayato kamisato/reader

SYNOPSIS... whispers of an unhappy marriage seem to have fallen on deaf ears, OR it is deep within the Kamisato Estate where you bury your broken heart, far away from the encompassing reach of a loveless union with AYATO.

⋆ warnings, kamisato ayato x fem-presenting!reader, alcohol consumption, a CHILD, marriage conflict, & the crippling weight of complexities that follow an unhappy marriage :\

⋆ notes, this is for my mama, who never got the courage nor the chance to make the choice i wish for anyone in this situation to make. (SORRY FOR LEAVING THIS AS A CLIFFHANGER PLS FORGIVE ME I BEG) p.s. i'll make a part two bc i can't end it like this, y/n deserves a happy ending.

⋆ tags! @rqkuya @sohyuki @usertsubaki @rinoomi @scaramew @rainsoughtflowers @rysird @manji-ro @xiaophobic @redninjakitty14rp @meowlumi @mimissubway

kamisato ayato does not come home.

you let this cascade down your throat and tell yourself it's just the sake when you feel it burn, vision blurring a bit as your eyes trace the gold edges of the glass you rotate between your fingertips.

it's nearly two am, but the city of inazuma has yet to rest its technicolor eyes, lost hopes and vivid dreams painting themselves in the brightest of hues between buildings and bustling streets.

it's laughable almost, the way you spend the latest hours of the night after tucking in your daughter sipping overpriced rice wine, and drowning in second-hand smoke, waiting for a man of all things.

your candle's nearly burned out of wick, and you sigh at the idea of having to purchase more, but you supposed you'd just send a butler to the candle shop. after all, how could you make an effective housewife if you didn't remain in the house?

but it is no surprise to you, the renowned head of hayashi clan and sole heir to one of the greatest legacies in the nation, that you are waiting out on your balcony overlooking the estate for your husband to miraculously walk through the front gates for once in the last few months.

and when he does, you're choking on your wine, eyes blinking furiously as you watch his tall but somewhat obscured figure waltzing through the front gates like its any other night he's supposed to be coming home; as if he hadn't been neglecting his own home for the past months.

"milday? the lord of the house has returned," a soft voice informs and you don't need to turn to see that it's your closest chambermaid, akane, the most loyal (and well informed) lady-in-waiting you'd ever had the honor of being acquainted with. "it would seem he's in a rather... sober state..."

you snort in amusement, lips pressing once more to the rim of the glass in your hand for a final sip, and you're thankful for the dull numbing that follows, a hot, searing emotion beginning to bubble in your chest. it would seem rice wine and sake have begun to lose its favored taste and you made a mental note to make sure akane arranged for it all to be removed from the house entirely. you never really liked it that much anyway.

you're making your way through the long hallway leading to the front courtyard, where akane tells you he is lounging. when you walk out, ayato is seated at the chabudai, his back facing you as he gazes out into the night sky. on the table sits a warm teapot and akane comes to place a second cup down before you can take a seat, bowing politely before stepping away to remain at the outer edges of the raised patio.

ayato has not turned once to address your presence, nor do you beckon him to with a greeting. you settle gracefully on the zaisu, tucking your feet beneath you before taking the pot to pour yourself a drink. it is quiet but for the summer insects and the sloshing of green tea as you fill your cup.

"it's a little late for tea, isn't it, sweetheart?" his voice is smooth and almost taunting in the tension-filled atmosphere. turning to face you, the azure of his eyes probably would have had you drowning to your death if you hadn't been so accustomed to every one of his antics over the years.

"oh please," you chuckle, examining the cup in your hands, "you flatter me, darling. but yes, i concur it's too far into the evening to be enjoying a casual drink. on the contrary, one might note that there is no time a house lord should and shouldn't be allowed to enjoy his evening tea."

not that there ever was a lord of the house to enjoy tea, you thought behind a sip of hot tea.

"then to what do i owe the pleasure to?" he's watching you carefully, from the way you sip your tea haphazardly to your direct eye contact.

you hum, as if to mull it over. "well, perhaps i was hoping you'd had come to your senses, but i suppose you can't teach an old dog new tricks."

you hear him scoff, an incredulous look marring the complexion of his face. irritation laces his low voice, "dear archons, y/n, i don't have time for this."

and it's in that moment you find the anger bubbling up your throat in a cruel laugh, whirling sharply to bring your hands against the lacquered wood of the table. "well then, commissioner, i daresay i must ask what in the hell do you have time for? because it obviously isn't your home," you spit, venom and heat keeping your throat in a chokehold.

akane shifts uncomfortably from where she stands across the room from you and you allow some space between you and your husband to reassure her.

ayato's laugh is unamused and withering, "you know, my sweet bride, you truly are insufferable." his eyes have narrowed. "is it attention? are you perhaps, unsatisfied with your life of luxury? not enough treasures to satiate your heart?"

this infuriates you. "treasures?! i attempt to discuss the real issues here and you dare frame me—"

"what else could it be?!" ayato brings the cup down with a curt slam that causes you to flinch. "i work day and night tirelessly to settle the most complicated of national affairs and the moment i return home you bring up the most trivial of matters? have you any shame?"

"we are married," you seethe.

"only by law," he bites back, which once more makes you flinch. this causes you to pause, the man before you breathing heavily out of anger. "only. by. law."

and something on your face contorts in the way your heart seems to twist at his statement. ayato does not spare the moment to continue. "did you truly think there was more to this union than political benefit? that there was love or even consideration of feelings? archons, y/n, you are so naive. there is no love!"

in that moment you feel your anguish clawing at your throat, harassing your voicebox into letting it be heard—and you almost do, if it hadn't been for the tiny voice that calls out from where akane stands. "okasaan...?"

a tiny figure hides behind your lady-in-waiting, her blue hair and eyes reflecting that of the man across from you. your eyes widen at the sight, panic in your expression when you meet akane's apologetic one.

sora.

you close your eyes for a second, collecting the salvable pieces of yourself from this conversation. you stand, "well, kamisato-sama, i suppose this is where i bid you a fair evening." you walk over to akane, opening your arms to receive a tired little sora, sleep still adorning her soft expression. "i can assure you personally that you will never again have to deal with such trivial matters, after all, i'm sure even a moment of your time would cost a fortune."

"kasaan? otosan said there was no love?" sora's voice is quiet against your hair as she rests her head in the crook of your neck. you pause in your step, turning to look at the man in question.

you cannot read the emotion in his deep, azure irises nor do you attempt. that would suggest you considered his feelings, which you simply cannot! the edges of your lips pull to form a sad smile, the corners of your eyes burning with the last bit of care you might ever shed for him. "you're too young to worry about that, my sweet little flower," you soothe, not breaking eye contact with him. "if he was your father, he'd have the heart to know that a father would never say such a thing."

sora mumbles an 'okay' against your neck and you smooth a hand down your hair, coaxing her to sleep. you turn, watching his expression as you walk away. "i've always loved you enough for the both of us anyway."

something behind his eyes shifts at your tone, but you're sure it's not remorse. because kamisato ayato does not know love, nor feel remorse for matters concerning his home.

part 2 ! | part 3 ! | part 4 ! | part 5 ! (still in progress)

© tb3ih mmxxii all rights reserved.

[2ch3rr13s]

Too little, too late

im bored on a drive and I have nothing to do, so why not have some angst?? Mostly supposed to genshin, but I kinda wanna do honkai star rail too, so if you see traveler or paimon its trailblazer and march 7th :)

When he first heard you utter your words of affirmation for him, he knew not what to say or do. He knew that you had feelings for him, but for reasons unknown to either of you, he denied your feelings.

Seeing the pained expression on your face made him want to take back his words, but he knew this was for the best, other wise you'd only get hurt in the end.

Either way, it hurt you, with a heavy heart, and tears in your eyes you left him there alone as he tried to ignore the way his chest panged in guilt and agony at your expression.

It was the last time he ever seen you, he would wait and wait as if you would come back to him as casual as the the days before your confession, but why aren't you here now?

He'd be lying if he said his heart didn't drop when the Traveler (or Trailblazer) ran to him, a panicked expression with small tears in their eyes.

So when they told him of your injured state, he knew to get up and go along with them as the traveler led him to a clinic.

A nurse greeted the two, and out came a doctor from the back with a solemn expression and all bloodied, his eyes on the ground before he looked up a bit taken back from the amount of people.

He opened his mouth, but the doctor held up his hand, just as a nurse went to the back to console a sobbing Paimon (or March 7th). With the cries that reached his ears, you were no longer in this world anymore.

Traveler's (Trailblazer's) hands flew to their mouth as their own tears cascaded down their cheeks as they moved to go see your body before you were moved elsewhere for your burial.

As he was left there, he could help but feel as if it was his fault you were dead. If things would have went differently on that day, would you still be alive and in his arms?

No matter he forced himself to go to the back room, and nothing could prepare himself for what he seen in the small room.

Of course he looked over to Paimon and Traveler (March 7th and Trailblazer) who were sobbing like children, he want to console them, because he knew he would be the same if he looked over to your bloodied corpse on the medical bed.

His throat tighten, and he felt like he couldn't breathe when looked over to all the blood. Cuts, bruises, and large gashes covered your body as he felt his eyes burn.

A choke sob left his body as he took large stride to your side of the bed. He dropped to his knees and took one of your bloodies limp hands in his and he felt himself sob harder as he could no longer feel any warmth to you.

You were gone and you never got to hear the words he wished to say to you all those days ago. Nor will you ever get to hear him much he actually loved and adored you.

He was too late to realize his own feelings, how stupid of him, right Y/n?

ZHONGLI, XIAO, CHILDE, AYATO, DILUC, KAEYA, SAMPO, DAN HENG, WELT, kazuha, heizou, wanderer

[wondermilka]

Unbound Sacrifice

Pairing : Ayato x reader

Synopsis : Your relationship ended when he was bound to marry another for the sake of his clan.

TW : Angst, no comfort.

You glanced nervously at your watch, waiting anxiously for Ayato to arrive at your secret meeting spot.

You had been sneaking around, stealing precious moments together for the past few months.

Your love had blossomed in the shadows, forbidden by Ayato's political lineage and your ordinary background.

Ayato was the heir to a powerful political dynasty, while you were just an ordinary civilian, an insignificant being in the grand tapestry of his world.

Your relationship had been filled with stolen glances, secret smiles, and whispered promises.

Each secret meetings had brought you closer, but also increased the sense of danger that lingered in the air.

You both knew the stakes were high, and yet your hearts refused to be silenced.

Your heart sank at the sight of him, for you knew something was wrong. He approached you, his face resembled with a mixture of pain and determination.

Ayato, tall and distinguished, emerged from the shadows. His eyes, once filled with love and longing, now bore a somber expression.

"Y/N," Ayato began, his voice trembling with emotion. "We need to talk."

You moved to a secluded spot, where the city's noises faded into the background, leaving only the sound of your racing hearts.

Your breath caught in your throat, fearing what was to come. You nodded, your eyes filled with unshed tears.

"I can't do this anymore," Ayato said, his voice heavy with regret. "I've made the decision."

Your voice trembled as you whispered, "What decision?"

Ayato took a deep breath, bracing himself for the painful words he was about to utter.

"For the sake of my clan, for the greater good, I have to let you go."

"I'm going to marry someone else," he states, his gaze fixed on the ground.

You had known deep down that your love was destined to be doomed, but the reality of it struck you with a force you could hardly bear.

The words echoed in your ears, tearing at your soul. It felt as if a thousand daggers pierced your heart all at once.

"But Ayato, we love each other!" you pleaded, tears streaming down your cheeks. "Can't we fight for our love? Can't we find a way to be together?"

Ayato's eyes met yours, filled with a mixture of sadness and regret. "Y/N, you don't understand," he said, his voice strained.

"The expectations placed upon me, the responsibilities I carry, they leave me with no choice. Marrying another will secure connections, political stability, and the future of my family. I cannot sacrifice all that for our love."

The reality of your circumstances had caught up with you, and there was no escaping its grip.

Your heart shattered into a million pieces. You had always known your love was a risky decision, but hearing Ayato's reasoning felt like a cold, bitter truth.

Your love, once vibrant and fierce, had been defeated by duty.

With one final glance, Ayato turned and walked away, leaving you alone in the darkness. Your tears fell like rain as you tried to grasp the reality of the sacrifice Ayato was making.

[eisdendrobium]

fly high, my little dove

pairings : ayato x reader summary : you've loved ayato for so long yet never once had he return the feeling, so with a heavy heart you decides to let go.

"i like you, Lord Kamisato."

you could see his eyes widened and a surprised chuckle left his mouth. "what is it that you like in me?" strong yet curious eyes stare at you, waiting for your answer

"well.. you're kind and.. charming, i mean you could protect inazuma and fight,, it's really cool you know..?" you answered with such uncertainty in you.

i mean, it's not that you're making up excuses for liking the Yashiro Commissioner, it's just the way his eyes stare at you so intently with an expression you couldn't read.

he opened his mouth to answer but nothing came out for a second-probably thinking what he's going to say.

"what makes you suddenly say all of this to me?"

"i- well.. i made a bet with Miko, she said that if i got accepted at a company in sumeru i should confess to you, and... i got accepted"

he nods his head, and stays silent for a moment before speaking again. "but you're just confessing right? not..." your eyes widen and you shake your head "no! of course not! ...i'm just confessing"

suddenly an unexpected adrenaline runs in you and you muster up your courage to ask him your last question,

"well... how about you?"

"well i don't really have any plans on leaving inazuma right now.." a way to make the situation more awkward ayato.

"no- i mean.. do you see yourself dating..." you mutter, eyes casting downwards, suddenly losing your braveness

"pardon? could you please repeat that? i didn't quite catch it"

"do you see yourself dating, Lord Kamisato?" "i'm sorry?" if it weren't for the suffocating atmosphere you were sure you'd strangle this man to death for making you repeat that three time. but you repeat your question anyway, making sure it's louder this time.

and how you could see the way his face fell into hesitation, he turns his head to the side and let out a breath "uhm.. i'm sorry, but.. i don't see myself dating anyone right now"

ouch.

you inhale a deep breath and plaster a big smile on your face "oh, yeah! it's fine, i totally understand!"

Ayato gave you a small sympathetic smile "sorry" and proceed to leave the scene.

Miko, who's waiting not far from the scene went out of her hiding spot after Ayato walks away. You could see the sad smile on her face as she embraces you.

tears starts pouring out of your eyes while you try so desperately wipe them off but it never seem to stop flowing anyway.

you tell yourself that it was better to tell him now and move on later than never telling him how you feel, over and over again yet somehow, it hurts. so damn much.

Miko tries to comfort you yet it just made you feel worse "shh... it's okay.. let it all out.. it's his loss rejecting an angel like you.."

his words of rejection keeps playing inside your head, and oh how your heart broke even more every time you remember. You feel like a fool. Loving a Yashiro Commissioner and thinking he would feel the same way as you.

---

ever since that day, you starts to avoid ayato at all cost, i mean how could you not? every time you look at him you feel the urge to break. So, you disappear, always leaving the scene whenever he enters or hiding amongst the crowd whenever he's around.

the only time you see each other is when it was work. even at work you tried your best to avoid looking at his figure. and so did he.

---

sometimes you overthink, about him, about you. What is it that you really love about him? years you've spent loving him yet never once did he gave you the same loving feeling. Small, fragile, awkward, and disappointment. that was all he ever gave you - all that he made you feel.

loving Kamisato Ayato is torture, a torture so addictive you couldn't escape it. Falling harder every day even when all he gives you is his cold gaze and fake smile.

you could see how he laugh and smile around thoma and the traveler. You also heard one of his speech a few weeks after that day.

"if an opportunity comes to you, treat it like you would treat something dear"

it felt like a void was sucking you in and you couldn't help but chuckle. Of course, if you were an opportunity he wouldn't treat you like how he did all these time. If you were an opportunity he would smile and laugh with you like he did with Thoma and the traveler.

---

finally. it's the day of your departure, three months after that day. You could finally be free. Bidding your last goodbye to everyone, you stops when you were in front of him. "i guess this is it, thank you for everything Ayato" you look up at him, seeing how his violet orbs are dancing around, reflecting the sun.

this was the very first time you've ever called him by his actual name, not the usual 'Lord Kamisato'.

"yeah, thank you for everything too" he replied, eyes darting away from you to the ship you're boarding.

and right after that, you left.

---

a year had passed since you left inazuma. happy to say you've moved on from Ayato, your life is amazing, you love your job, you've met loads of friends, and.. you may have met a new person to put your interest on.

but you missed your homeland, so you decides to take a visit there.

arriving at inazuma you were greeted by Miko and Thoma. greeting them and everyone else you knew along the way before finally meeting him again.

Thoma gesture him to come when he sees you. Walking towards each other you finally lock eyes with Ayato. after many years not being able too.

Thoma and Miko seemed to understand something and stops their track to give you and Ayato some time alone.

"Ayato." his name came out so smoothly out of your mouth, yet you keep your tone firm.

"[name]" he spoke softly in return, violet eyes never leaving yours

you give him a small nod

"...you finally say my name" you said breathlessly.

a/n : reblogs are greatly appreciated! and please feel free to comment what you think about this fic ^^

[scaranation]

༊*·˚ 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒’ 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐁𝐈𝐓

header art by @/kkaags on twitter

Pairing: chess captain!Ayato x reader

Content: fluff, headcannons, modern high school au, ayato is slightly a red flag on this one

You joined the chess club as a newcomer to the game, where Ayato introduces himself as a fellow beginner. You think he's just terrible at chess - after all, how could he lose to you so often? However, as time goes on, you begin to question if you're the one who's been playing into his hands all this time...

a/n - was just rereading ayato lore and remembered he plays chess, so i wanted to write about him doing it in a modern chess setting where he's absolutely whipped for the reader 😭 i cant stop writing about desperate genshin men im so sorry

chess captain!ayato, who’s been harbouring a small crush on you ever since you stepped foot in campus. despite taking different classes, you’d always be the centre of his attention, even if you rarely interacted with him.

chess captain!ayato, who’s elated to see you join the club. the moment you confess to being a beginner, he flashed you a smile before asserting that he, too, was new to the game.

chess captain!ayato, who revelled in the gleeful look on your face whenever you won a game against him. he’d take care to fumble right into your victory each time, just to feel his heart flutter when you smiled.

chess captain!ayato, who’d play exactly as you wanted when you tried book moves for the first time. oh, you were attempting a scholar’s mate? he’d ‘accidentally’ fall right into the trap, feigning shock as you smugly pushed your queen to F7.

chess captain!ayato, who ignored the incredulous looks everyone else shot him when he blundered his way through every game with you. as a highly accomplished player - winning all the tournaments he competed in - it certainly was a sight to see the kamisato ayato open with pawn to H4.

chess captain!ayato, who would only play at his true level when you weren’t looking. his favourite hobby was to push the worst move possible and watch your thinly veiled happiness as you won yet again, pretending to be annoyed when you teased him for his ‘stupidity’.

chess captain!ayato, who would leave ayaka to run the club as his vice captain whenever he was busy in a game with you. he enjoyed the expression on your face as you thought, the light twitching of your lips to murmur ghostly syllables to yourself. he liked to imagine how those lips would feel on his.

chess captain!ayato, who would desperately try to prevent you from realising he wasn’t exactly as bad as you thought he was. when you were talking to your friends about how absolutely hopeless he was at chess, he’d shoot them a silencing look to staunch their shocked expressions. if you tried to look up previous records from tournaments, you’d somehow find yourself in conversation with him and forget about what you were doing entirely.

chess captain!ayato, who’d nod eagerly and let you ‘coach’ him in chess. he’d smile so delicately as you bid him good luck before a tournament, whilst everyone else idly wondered why on earth the feared ayato would need help to be reminded of piece value.

chess captain!ayato, who’d be too immersed to notice you if you walked in on him playing a proper game. you’d be stunned at the way his fingers gracefully snapped the pieces into position without hesitation, the subtle clink of lacquered wood against the board reasonating through the room as he claimed piece after piece. he was nothing like the foolish, impulsive player you’d versed countless other times.

chess captain!ayato, who’d study his opponents with an almost terrifying look of sheer calculation. his eyes would skim emotionlessly over the board, lithe hands almost flying between the pieces and the timer. occasionally, a cold smirk or two would escape - indicative of his incoming victory.

chess captain!ayato, who’d look so wounded when you found out - acting like you’d caught him cheating on your non-existent relationship. you’d only feel embarrassed at having thought you were better than this absolute menace of a player, whilst he apologised time and time again before (timidly) asking you to play one more round.

chess captain!ayato, who’d then offer to properly teach you outside of school hours. of course, he didn’t view them as tutoring sessions - he saw them as dates. or, perhaps, just opportunities for him to admire your face until he reached the stage of his plan where he could ask you out, and you’d be too equally infatuated to refuse.

Checkmate.

༊*·˚

[dukewrio]

and always (ayato x sick!reader)

request?: yep!

warnings: panic attack, fear of hospitals (specific reason not mentioned), blood mention, some mild spoilers for the musketeer event quest

-

y/n’s legs give out from underneath them as they step out onto the porch adjacent to their room. they fall into the trap of exhaustion, laying fully on the wood planks, gasping in the fresh air. just as the feeling of relief fills y/n’s sickly body, it is immediately replaced by chills. y/n knows their fever has gone up exponentially in the past few days, but still is determined to fight it off traditionally.

normally when they would get sick, ayato would take care of them, he always had the perfect remedy for any ailment. however, ayato was in fontaine when y/n’s symptoms began and since he returned two days ago, he added more tasks to his plate than normal in an attempt to begin foreign cultural exchanges with the other nations in teyvat. seeing this caused y/n to keep their illness from her fiancé, not wanting to add to the tasks he had. it was easy, provided he had spent most of his time locked in his office.

y/n musters the strength to sit up and slouch themselves against the wall. soon regretting the movement as it triggers a coughing fit. their hand flies up to cover their mouth as the coughing worsens. y/n can’t even be surprised when a hand rest on their shoulder, all of their energy being drained. when the coughing finally subsides, y/n pulls their hand from their mouth to be greeted with the alarming sight of blood dripping down their palm. instinctively they look up at their new company in shock, and meet ayato’s eyes. they swear they saw a flash of fear in ayato’s blues right before the calculating mask glazes them over once again.

“y/n, how long has this been happening?” ayato asks softly.

“about 5 day-“

“5 days?!“ ayato exclaims. “why didn’t you tell me? i have been home for the past two?”

“you just got back and i-“

“i am taking you to the hospital.”

“no!” y/n yells. their eyes widening as they pull away from ayato’s grasp. tears appear cascading down their face. y/n moves their hands to cover their ears, too overwhelmed to notice the slick feel of the blood on their hand resting on their ear. “i can’t, you can’t, please,” they beg.

“y/n, how can i help?” ayato asks, keeping a distance as to not overwhelm them. “i think your illness is out of the scope that i can take care of myself.”

y/n’s head shakes and they begin to hyperventilate.

“no, no hospital please,” y/n sobs. breaths becoming more frequent as they continue to curl themselves away from their fiancé. ayato’s heart breaks at the sight. he knows they aren’t scared of him, only scared that he will take them somewhere they don’t want to go. however, the idea of bringing stress to his loved one instead of protecting them opens an old wound.

at a stalemate of what to do, y/n’s breathing only gets more frantic. the demons swimming in their head only add to the stress of the situation. y/n’s throat feels like it’s on fire, their illness only making it far worse. slowly y/n’s body starts to give in to exhaustion, the blurry world around them goes dark.

“y/n!”

-a couple hours later-

“so they are going to be okay?” ayato’s voice breaks through the dark quietly, still slightly muffled, but nearby.

“yes, i only wish you would have called for me sooner, their condition was rather serious,” a second unfamiliar voice speaks. y/n slowly opens their eyes only to be met with the inside of their and ayato’s shared room. a cool wet rag rests on their forehead. seconds later ayato walks back into the room, immediately making eye contact with y/n.

“you’re awake,” he smiles, a sad one. “i called for the doctor, he said you have a strong respiratory infection,” he stands to the side of the bed, at a distance, still unsure of your comfort with him.

“ayato, i’m sorry, i just-“

“you don’t need to apologize, and we can talk more in depth on this once you are better,” he pulls out a container. “the doctor gave me this prescription for you and some care instructions, you should be better in about a week.”

y/n reaches their hand out towards ayato. he takes it as a sign to come closer, he sits on the edge of their bed holding onto y/n’s hand.

“i’m here for you now, and always.”

-

a/n: hope this is what you had in mind. i kinda broke my heart with ayato for this. like i just started really liking him, and reading his lore.

masterlist

[chilumi-shipper]

Forget and Regret (3)

Kamisato Ayato x Fem!Reader

Summary: Part 3 of "Forget and Regret" (here's Part 2). Here comes the comfort, very much needed after all the pain.

You didn't think you'd be waiting another 8 months, did you?

Tags: Angst w/ happy ending, Hurt/Comfort, Crying, A little swearing, Maybe a little naughty in the end (nothing explicit)

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

The Yashiro Commissioner woke up in a bed with a familiar fragrance, a homey comforting aroma from the sheets. A damp warm towel rested upon his forehead, his eyes staring up into the ceiling of a house he knew quite well.

His clothes had been replaced by a comfortable robe, a robe he knew was specially made for him, by a certain lady as a gift for their 3rd anniversary.

He remembers.

Just after he sat up on the bed, you emerged from the door. You seemed surprised to see him awake.

He tried to call out your name, but then he realized that his throat was so dry he couldn't say a word.

You noticed immediately, "I'll get you some food and water." Hurried steps can be heard even if he couldn't see you, and a few minutes went by before you came again with a tray carrying a bowl of Miso Soup and a glass of water.

You set the tray beside him, before taking the damp towel off his forehead so it wouldn't fall when he ate.

He didn't move a muscle though, he merely just looked at you.

"I know what you've gone through wasn't easy." You sighed, sitting down on a chair you pulled closer to the bed. "Eating will help you regain some strength."

His heart clenched, his beloved wife was right in front of him. Ayato's eyes wet with tears, which didn't go unnoticed by you.

"Hey, it's okay..." Despite being quite vulnerable right now, Ayato still noticed the shaking of your voice, like you were reassuring the both of you.

You urged him to eat and drink, making sure that he had his fill.

As he ate, he couldn't help but watch as your eyes produced tears of their own.

It was quiet for a moment, but the inevitable will soon come.

"Thank you."

"No need for that." You send him a small smile. "It's the least I can do after being such a bad wife." He looked quite displeased when you said that, indicated by the frown that formed on his face.

"You're not a bad wife."

"Have you recovered your memories?" He merely nodded at your question, making you sigh. "Then you should know that that is a lie."

Despite Ayato being at a position to be angry again, to go off at you for doing what you did, he remained quiet, with his heart beating fast.

He could no longer do that to you, he just wanted you back.

"I guess it's time for me to explain." You let out an awkward chuckle, feeling your husband's gaze point to you after you said those words. "It's plain and simple. I made it so that it was like we never met. That's what you wanted."

"I..." Ayato couldn't say anything back, he was only shaking his head. "No, that's not..."

You cleared your throat, standing up and taking the tray. "Even if you got all your memories back, we can stay this way. We never met, we don't know each other, we never got married. I can even move aw-"

"No." He said firmly, stopping you from moving away from him. Your intention of leaving the room and calm yourself down was cut off when his gaze landed on the box on your nightstand.

He pulled the box containing the necklace from your nightstand. Pulling out the jewelry, he promptly showed it to you.

"What does this mean?"

"...It's... the constellation in the sky above us when we first met." You answered uncertainly, not sure where he's heading with that information.

"This is proof that we met, and this..." Ayato took out his wedding ring. "Is proof that we got married."

He stood up from you bed, immediately walking towards you and took the tray away from your hands, placing it back on the bed before holding both your hands in his.

"I love you." Ayato stated confidently, like there was nothing he was more sure of than the words that just came out of his mouth.

You looked into his eyes, filled with determination.

If kneeling in front of you and begging for you to stay and be his again, he was ready to do so.

He got on his knees, and despite your protest and attempt to pull him up on his feet, he remained kneeling.

"I don't ever want to forget you again." Your husband's breathing was shaky, like he was about to cry. "I've always been so lucky that I met you, haven't I?" You shook your head, a single tear lead to a total crying fit.

"I'm sorry..."

You got on his level, on your knees as well. "M-Me too. Oh Archons, I'm so sorry, Ayato." You hugged him, burying your face on his chest.

You hear a sigh of contentment leave him as he hugged your shaking figure.

"Please, don't go." He whispered to your ear, before he pressed a kiss on your forehead.

It was hard to respond, you had hiccups from all your sobbing, but you tried your best to shake your head no, stating that you won't leave him, that you won't go.

"I am so fucking glad I remember you."

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

"Looks like you managed everything in the Shuumatsuban while I was 'gone'." Ayato smiled as you when he saw that the Yashiro Commissioner was as organized as ever.

"With help from others. I figured it's the least I could do." You said sheepishly, making your husband chuckle.

"You did such a fantastic job that I actually have time to do many other of my duties!" You looked at him curiously when you saw his expression change as if he was planning something.

"What might those duties be?"

"I just so happen to remember very clearly..." He walked closer to you, intertwining his hand with yours and carefully pulling you to your shared room. "That we talked something about... a family of our own?"

As he locked the door of your room, you felt an excited shiver grow within you. "I want to fulfill my duty as a husband as well."

"My most important duty."

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Mentions: @nasidibakar @kisum9 @kittycasie @ramvuda @the-real-fandom-person @xiaopleasecomehome @lswtamashi @rustybucketofghosts @him3ru @tartagliasmoneybag @eurooki @spicycloudsalad @icarusignite @foxlady99 @mnoxsk @dreamsarenicer @sunsethw4 @lady-cryptstone @chimsblogg others I couldn't mention for some reason.

Yeah, it's done now :))

I really hope you enjoyed this series, man did it take a lot out of me.

Thanks for reading, enjoy your day!!

[haithamuse]

☆ ANAGEPSIS

the feeling when one no longer loves someone they once did — ft. ayato, thoma, diluc

cw. angst (falling out of love) so good luck 👍 0.7k wc

  ˖˚˳⊹ KAMISATO AYATO

Ayato was in denial. Could this really be happening? Never once in his life had he even dared to imagine that falling out of love is something he could experience.

Truly, he really thought that he was incapable of it. And yet here he was, slowly coming to the realisation that maybe — this might be what is happening to you right now.

The Commissioner didn’t know how he it got to this point and he loathes himself for it. This is not what you had deserved — a marriage with broken promises. He is not the husband anymore who had promised to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. Ayato is but a husk of that man now — he still tries to hold justice to his promise, to love and honour you all the days of his life.

But with each passing day, it gets harder and harder to keep up the facade. The passion he held for you isn’t there anymore, that candle has been burnt out. He wonders — where did it all go?

Kamisato Ayato may be a man that can shield his true persona from the rest of the world, but you see his feelings slipping through the cracks before he does.

He loves you, but not in the way it used to be.

˖˚˳⊹ THOMA

Thoma doesn’t even realise it. He doesn’t notice how he rushes towards his next tasks before giving you a quick goodbye. When his back turns towards you, he doesn’t see how your arm still lingers in the air, reaching out to him, longing for his warmth for just a second longer.

Ignorance is bliss, they say — it saves him the view of your heartbroken face that yearns for its lover.

Thoma doesn’t see how he pulls away from kisses much quicker than before, offering you an apologetic smile. You’d ask him if everything is fine, is there anything he wants to talk about?

“Don’t worry!”, he’d reassure you while scratching the back of his head, his signature smile flashing back at you. “I’m just busier than usual lately.”

And it broke you — his words not offering any comfort to you at all. Instead, they hurt you even more and instilled anxiety on you. Thoma doesn’t seem to register, but you immediately do.

He doesn’t call you by endearing nicknames anymore — the ones he’d always insist on using as if his life depended on it.

˖˚˳⊹ DILUC RAGNVINDR

Diluc seems to regress to the man he was before courting you — distant and reserved.

You were used to the fact that your husband needed space every now and then, and you gladly gave it to him. Afterwards, Diluc would always make sure to repay you — telling you how much he loved you and how thankful he was that you respected his needs and wants. You’ve always been patient with him, as he has been with you.

Yet, your endurance slowly but surely runs thinner the longer Diluc seems to draw this out. He actively avoids you, staying out long deep into the night and taking over more shifts at the Angel’s Share. Even Kaeya has commented on his behaviour, much to his brother’s dismay.

Diluc seemingly snaps at everyone and everything — taking his anger out on everyone but you, because he wouldn’t want you to be the last victim to the battles he has with himself.

You don’t even know if he comes home to sleep in your shared bed anymore. Waking up to an empty and cold bedside, you don’t know if it was because your lover left early or because the sheets have never been occupied for the night.

It wasn’t until you stayed up for days and nights in hopes to catch him that you’d get a confession. In your mind you had already planned out and mulled over the conversation dozens of times, ready to release all those pent-up feelings. But when Diluc finally stepped through the front door, you were too tired to even muster up a greeting.

Though there was no need to do so anyway. When your husband saw your worn out and exhausted figure, he broke down — spilling out all the unsaid thoughts and feelings he had for you.

“Please”, he’d beg in between sobs. “Give us a chance to fix this.”

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[covenantofthedeep]

but i'm right where you left me ☆

feat. | kaveh, kaeya, xiao, and ayato! summary | you're moving, but he'll wait an eon for you. - angst a/n | ahahaha i haven't written angst in so long. my ayato one is the best lowkey so i'm putting it at the top 😇😇😇

kamisato ayato |

that night, as ayato refers to it in his head, left him wounded and reeling and never wholly himself again. that night, where you had kissed him gently, too gently for the words cutting out of your mouth, and then left. that night, where you had vanished without a trace and promised you'd be back. that night, two years ago.

you had been eating a picnic dinner in front of the kamisato estate, the waves lapping at your bare feet, leaning against his shoulder. moonlight had wreathed his face in a holy glow, and a sharp pang of regret had dug itself into your ribs and stayed there. did you really have to leave? couldn't you just stay here, frozen in time, on this sandy beach, with the man you loved?

"ayato," you tell him, leaning into his ear. "i've got something to tell you."

he rests his chin against you, leaning his cheek on the crown of your head. "what is it, love?"

and suddenly you don't want to tell him, but the words are out of your mouth before you can stop them, and he draws away from you, hurt flashing in his brilliant blue eyes. he caresses your cheekbone with his finger, telling you it'll be okay, it'll be fine, you'll be back before the blink of an eye, it'll be okay.

his heart protests as he wraps ice around it, willing himself not to cry. he's not emotional; never will be. you smile at him, telling him thank you for being so understanding, telling him i love you and i'll miss you and thanking archons that he isn't upset.he nods through the rest of the night, numb and hot and cold all at once.

and then you leave, and there's a sinking pit in his stomach, because he wonders if you'll ever come back. how many years, he wonders, can he go without you until he withers up and fades away?

kaveh |

he's never been overly sappy with you, choosing instead to shower you with trips and picnics, flirtatious smiles and fancy dinners (although how he affords it, you don't know), as he's done with every other one of his lovers. he's considered himself a man of strong self-worth, never shattering when he's been dumped.

something about you, though, has him on his knees. he wants to beg and plead until you stay, cry and confess his love to you a thousand times. he's not a very emotional man; ask anyone. the pain in his eyes makes you want to stay and take his face in your hands and kiss him until he feels better, but you've got to go. a droplet of rain hits the back of your neck, making you shiver.

"i have to go. i think it'll be good for you, maybe you can branch out--" you start, but he cuts you off. he reaches for you, taking your hands in his.

"do you think i would want anyone else but you? all the days we spent together, did those mean nothing to you?" he pleads of you. wind whips your hair into your eyes, and he reaches forward and tucks it behind your ear. you've never seen him so vulnerable, and you have to leave before you can't.

and so you do, turning your back on him, leaving him standing in front of the akademiya, a dark silhouette against the cold, troubled sky.

"i'll wait for you," he calls after you. "i'll wait forever and ever until you come back."

kaeya alberich |

kaeya's never loved anyone as much as he's loved you, and between his devil-may-care exterior, and the way he won't share anything with anyone, you hadn't realized. when you tell him you're leaving, he's drops his wine glass. it shatters, and he steps over it, reaching for your arm. "no, love," he says, eyes desperately searching your face.

you swallow back a lump in your throat as you step away. "i have to go, kaeya," you tell him, tears pressing behind your eyes.

the sun highlights your body, and he thinks bitterly that you've never looked more perfect than you are now. it's the middle of the day, and you're on the balcony, his wineglass at his feet, shattered and akin to his heart.

you press your lips together to stop them from trembling and whisper, "i'll come back, kaeya. i promise."

he can't conjure up a response, instead turning away and leaning against the railings, looking down at the sidewalk below. he's tense; you want to change your mind and throw yourself at him and hug him and never let him go but.

but.

"if you're going," he says thickly, refusing to look at you, "then go."

his split heart doesn't pick itself up until many years later.

xiao |

xiao has known pain, agony so deep and gut-wrenching it doubles him over. xiao has known loneliness and sadness. he has known ecstasy--but only after he met you.

he always thought the two of you were perfect, forever a package deal, a pair. you clearly had different plans, and now his pain is back, familiar and terrifying.

"xiao," you plead, "it's not for forever."

he takes a deep breath, inhaling the petrichor air, the rich smell of the ground that you're lying on. rain pelts his face and his hands and his hair, beading on your eyelashes and concealing the tears that trickle down your cheek and into your hair.

you watch him anxiously, considering turning towards him and taking his hand until he looks at you, maybe--

"oh, my love," he says finally, turning towards you. there are so many words he could say. with you, i am happy. i am calm and safe. i can smile and laugh. with you, i am complete. he says none of these, instead opting for, "why?"

you blink away more tears, raising your arm to shield your face from his cut-glass gaze, his hurt eyes. i love you, you want to blurt. i'll always love you. but it'll hurt more, and instead, you get up and turn away. "i'll miss you, xiao," you tell him. "i'll come back."

he watches your retreating form, wondering where he went wrong. how many more years would he spend back in grayscale, without you to light up his days with splashes of aquamarine and vermillion?

[dark-night-hero]

「Love You In The Dark」 Kamisato Ayato

↳ In which the more you continue to love him in the dark the more you felt like not only were you breaking your heart, but also his.

It was a wonderful night. It was also a night before a wonderful celebration. And yet here you are due to some reasons resting at the back of the estate now that all tasks are done. Just a few moments ago, you were also doing packing your things. Looking at the stars, a smokin pipe in hand, you're leaning peaceful on the walls of the estate. But then that peaceful night was interrupted with a sound of light footsteps coming.

Alerted, you turn to look at the person only to relax. "My Lord." "I told you to call me Ayato when it's just the two of us- you're smoking." "Do you want some?" You offered in which he shakes his head. You just nod and continue to smoke for the last time as he slowly approaches you. "All the preparations were done for tomorrow's ceremony." "I've heard." "Then you should be asleep right now." "If I do, then I'll be regretting this in the morning." "I doubt that." You chuckle, putting out the flame and placing your smoking pipe down. There was a moment of silence after that.

"I would drop everything if you want me to." "I know. That's why I'm not asking for anything." Looking away from the stars, you look at him only to find him looking at you. So you look away, a small yet genuine smile on your face. "Do you hate me?" "I wish I could." You chuckle, "But what can we do?" You look at him once again. "It's not like I'm the one who's hurting." You reach out to brush off the silent tear on his cheek. "Don't cry, Ayato." "But you're leaving." "You're getting married." You caress his cheek affectionately. "I'm not asking for anything else, am I?" "I'd rather ask you to give up that damn marriage." "Hmmm, I wish I could."

"(First name)?" It was a familiar yet unfamiliar voice. You are pretty sure you have heard it somewhere. No, you were pretty sure you knew who was calling you, yet you didn't dare turn around. "(First name)." This time, you felt a gentle hold on your arm, causing you to shut your eye for a moment before turning around to face him.

As soon as you turn around, just like what you have expected, there he was, and for some odd reasons, seems flustered as he hold you by your arm, slightly panting as he look at you wide eyes as if he could not believe you are actually in front of him right now. "It's really you." "Mr. Kamisato, it's been a while." You smile gently at him, taking a step back, causing him to loosen his hold into you.

The was he reach out, nevertheless retracted his hand as he stared at it for a while before clenching and unclenching it then bringing it to his side before putting his attention into you. "Right, it's been a while. I've been looking for you." "All the way to Liyue?" You spoke before shutting up. That was wrong. In the first place, you should have just ignored him and went as fast as you can. "Mr. Kamisato, what are you even doing here? Never mind that I should get going now, Mr. Kamisato."

As you turn around and was about to leave, you feel a thug on your clothes. "Wait." Don't, leave him be. So you took a step forward, but he didn't let go. "Please wait-" "Let go while I'm asking nicely, Mr. Kamisato" You spoke with a sigh, heart painful throbbing on your chest. You should leave, leave, and never look back. You've done it once. You can do it again.

As you took a step forward, the moment you took a forceful step forward, you heard a sniff. Don't turn around. Another step followed by another sniff that you can feel your heart breaking a bit by bit. Here you thought it already shattered enough that day. "(First name), please. I- I was wrong." Don't turn around. "Please, hear me out." Don't turn around. Archons, don't. "Darling, please." Fuck! Don't turn around. You've done it once, why can't you do it again this time?

"Fuck!" You curse under your breath and turn around. "Why are you looking so pathetic crying in the middle of the street? Where is your dignity?!" You spoke as you grab him by his arm and started heading towards the direction of your house. "Those who knows you would be laughing, crying to see you in such pathetic state, you, the one and only Lord of the Kamisato clan!" You can not help your temper. He looks like he has not gone to sleep for years.

As soon as the two of you entered the house, you urged him for a bath. The thing is, you end up giving him a bath just like the good old days you never thought you would do again. "Don't cry." As he sits on the tub, he weakly reaches out to wipe away the tears rolling down your cheeks. "I hate seeing you cry." "Fuck you." You sniff and glare at him. "You- you should be in there living a happy- if not happy at least a contented and peaceful life. What in the fuck are you doing in here." You cried as you gently rinse off the shampoo in his hair.

"I let you go already, why are you here- fuck. What the fuck are you doing in here?" "I- I came to get you back." "I'm not going." "I didn't marry her." You almost splash him with a water in the face. "What do you mean?" "I called of the arrange marriage." He had a small smile on his face after that.

"I was wrong. If I truly love you, I should have never allow you to make such choice- there should have never been a choice to begin him." He look so tired when he said that, brushing back his wet strand of hair away from his face. "My lover is selfless" He added. "You told me to live a happy, if not a contented and peaceful life." When he looks at you, you look away but then a hand gently had you face him. "Darling. I can only achieve that life when you're by my side. I was wrong to realize it too late." Then you let out a sob. "I'm sorry. I really am. But please, please I'm begging you (First name). Come back to me."

The way you sob, it hurts. At the same time, was it relief that you are feeling right now? But then there comes the guilt. "I- we- let's get you dried up, Mr. Kamisato." "(First name)-" "Not now, let's get you dried up and clothed first." You spoke as calmly as possible as you stood up and wipe away your own tears. "Darling- please- I know you can't-" "Ayato." You look at him, "Dry up and dress up, I'm going to introduce you to someone."

The way he cautiously and nervously looks at you, who is currently helping him put on a new set of clothes. It seems like it was the clothes the locals here wear. But the thing is, why do you have spare clothes of man on your house? "One of the locals gave it to me." You suddenly explained, "They assumed I have a husband, so they just gave me this. I never thought it could be put to use until now." Suddenly, relief came into him, releasing the breath he's been holding on unconsciously.

"Come here." He had no choice but to follow you as you gently hold him by the hand, it was warm. "Who I'm about to introduce you, I'm sorry." "What-?"

The way his eyes widen as soon as his eyes set on the sleeping figure on the room just right next to you. He took a step back, his heart beating wildly on his chest, he looks like he was about to snap his neck the way he turn his head into you. "Is he?" His light purple iris were trembling as they looked into your (eye color) ones. You did not dare look away from him, not like you can as those teary eyes look into you with hope.

You wonder what he could be feeling right now. Pain? Happiness? Betrayal? Sadness? Before you could even think further, you watch in shock as he kneels in front of you, hands shaking as they hold into your clothes. "Please. I'm begging you. He's mine, right?" The way those bloodshot light purple iris looks at you. Those eyes were telling you, were begging you, even if it's a lie to tell him that the child peacefully sleeping on the bed was his.

"He's mine right? Please tell me he's mine." He looked desperate, he was desperate. He was begging on his knees. "Please say something." He begged, clenching on your clothes he was holding on. Then tears started falling, you don't know if it was his or yours. But then you nod, not trusting your voice. "I- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hide- hide it from you. I was just-" "I shouldn't have let you leave." In a split of seconds, you were in his arms.

"I'm sorry." He apologized. "I'm sorry." He repeatedly apologized as he held you tightly yet gently in his arms. "I'm sorry you had to leave and continue to love me in the dark." "And thank you." You felt him shake. "Thank you, fuck. Thank you." You just stood there, in your own tears as he held you in his arms. But then you slowly lifted your arms, and then you placed it on his back. "It's alright." As you gently tap his back in comfort, the more his shoulder quiver, the more you felt him hold you tighter, but, "It's alright."

It was an eventful night full of tears and revelation, almost like that night all those years ago, and yet for some odd reasons, it felt so different. For some reason, you no longer felt like it would be like the old times where the two of you have to love each other in the dark.

"Will it be alright for me to come back?" By your question, it made him scoff, gently shifting the child in his arms as the two of you look at the horizon as the two, three of you headed back in the nation the two of you belonged. "It's always been your home. Isn't it natural to come back where you belong?" "Still, the two of us-" "They know." "Huh?" "Would you believe me if I told you we were never in the dark?" For a moment, your (eye color) iris tremble.

"As funny as it may sound, everybody knows, can see how we felt for each other. That's why by the time I back down at the arranged marriage, they didn't find it strange." There was a small smile on his lips. "Would you believe me if I said Ayaka almost beaten me to death upon hearing your departure?" There was sad smile on his lips, but then he look down on his and your child in his arms.

"I'm sorry" "I told you it's alright-" "But it's not." He looks at you gently. "No matter what you say, time wasted is time wasted. I'm going to win you back no matter what you said." You blink at him. "What's the point of winning me again over when I was never over you?" This time, he blinks at you. "Is that so?" "Hmm." You hummed before the two of you let out a burst of laughter.

Suddenly, a harsh cold breeze passed by sending a shiver down your spine, as well as the child in Ayato's arms. "Let's head inside?" He asked, holding you close with his free hand before giving you a peck on your forehead. "Let's head inside." You replied as you started to make your way inside when you felt a thug on your clothes. It strangely felt deja vu.

It was strange at the same time it made you realize that, in fact, this was no longer a situation where you have to carry on things even though you are not fine. Nor were the two of you in a situation where you have to keep your love in the dark. This was no longer a situation where even without a fight, the two of you were placed in a situation where the two of you had to be defeated.

"What's wrong?" "I love you." It was strange but warm. "I don't think I ever said it openly and this loud before." The way he stood there with your and his child in his arms, the way he was rubbing his neck in flustered. You chuckle, "I love you too."

[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2023°

[xcyphoz0a]

Right person, wrong time.

Gender neutral reader, angst TW/CW: Angst. Word count: 375 Proofread: nope

|| Part 1 || || Part 2 < Here! ||

| To him, it was the right person, but the wrong time. |

Ayato thinks he could’ve done better– and he would’ve sworn that he wouldn’t do it again.

But he knows that its too late once he picks up the handwritten letter, words neatly written though black ink smudged with tear stains.

He knows that its too late when he asks around by himself, asking if anyone has seen you but the majority of responses he gets are that you already left by boat from Ritou.

And he thinks, what was the trigger to this downfall? He remembers the little to major things the two of you did– what made you laugh, what made you angry.

He ponders over the thought, as he sets down the brush on the table.

Was it due to his duties? Did he not pay attention to you?

He feels a dull ache and weight in his heart as he comes back to the imagination of you– your smile, the little wrinkles that the corners of your eyes made when you laughed.

He wishes to see you again.

Thunder strikes as the room flashes a vibrant purple, as his eyes scan over to the window outside.

And he swears that he could feel your presence near, outside: and he’s worried, whether or not you really are outside of his estate– he wants you to be safe, in his arms, where rain and thunder cannot reach you.

Ayato runs towards the small clearing slightly far from his home, and he thinks, for a moment, that he saw you there, facing the dark ash purple roofs of the estate, standing alone as you start walking away.

He blinks again, hair and clothes soaked in the harsh rainy weather as you disappear, as nothing but a mirage to his eyes.

He stands there, and despite the worried calls of the guards, he still stands, as he longs for you to come again, to repair the pieces back.

Yet he knows that he’s lost the chance that you’ve given him multiple times. And he knows, knows how that last memory of you and him, holding each other close as the rain pitter patters on the roof, will be the last to him.

And so he whispers, in hopes that you could hear,

“I’m sorry, (Y/n).”