#she was joking

[wish-i-were-heather]

my mom just told me "you need to be assessed" 💀💀

[or-we-could-take-a-walk-together]

i told my mom that they canceled shadow and bone and she said to me “grab your knife, we’re going to netflix” and i think it’s something we should all do

[faithfulcat111]

My mom: I blame you.

Me: Oh, it's my fault the ground was uneven?

My mom: Yes. You shifted the ground on purpose.

Me: How dare I.

My mom: Yes, how dare you.

[teethcritter]

my director told my mom shes kicking me out of the play for being a homestuck i cant believe this

[fancyfeathers]

Watching Star Wars with my girlfriend because I have not seen it since I was a child and I know one of my moots is a fan, you know who you are.

An I ask, who is the hottest character, and without hesitation…

Honey… are you okay?

[houseofoddballs]

My mother out of context

"I'm sorry (Y/n), I'll hive a sh*t about your college and education when I dont have to pee."

[clandestinegardenias]

My therapist just told me my problem is that I need to write more fanfiction.

[pirateprincessjess]

When I was a kid my family pretended to get raptured so I would think I was left behind on earth while they all went to heaven.

I was like 8 years old and my sister and mom had gotten really into the Left Behind novels (bible fan fic about the rapture). In the books when the rapture happened the clothes that people were wearing when they got raptured were left behind in neatly folded piles.

One day when I was getting home from school my family decided that they would leave piles of neatly folded clothes around the house, and then hide in the basement.

The intended effect was that I would get home and see the clothes then, think that my family had been raptured and that I wasn’t good enough to get into heaven… or something?

The problem was that I had never read these books, and didn’t really think about the rapture very often. There was no reason that I would see some laundry on the floor and think “The rapture happened and I’ve been abandoned by God! I’ll never see my family again!! Oh nooo!!!!”

I just sat down and watched cartoons and eventually my family got bored and revealed that they were all hiding in the basement.

It’s a good thing I didn’t understand the joke, otherwise that shit would have been traumatic.

[fazcinatingblog]

i sent the dumbest text in the world and got a reply and she doesn't entirely understand/grasp my meaning but come on man read between the lines

[blaithnne]

Live Mel reaction

[nefelibatat]

So if I were to take away from this moment something deeper than “man Sevika's a freak”, I'd point out that we've seen the same tactic not long before.

What does this say about Caitlyn? She's fighting dirty. She's fighting like a cornered rat. She's fighting like a Zaunite.

And first of all there's hypocrisy. Caitlyn's been calling these people animals and monsters and whatnot but when placed in an identical situation she responds identically. Case in point: getting so mad at Jinx for terrorizing people out of grief that she goes ahead and starts to terrorize people out of grief. Sevika's expression afterwards is mostly “joke's on you I'm into that” but there's some surprise there too — you wouldn't expect that move from a Piltie.

Then there's desperation. Because she needs revenge; she needs it or she'll never ever forgive herself for what happened. So she'll throw away her morals and her dignity and just do whatever it takes to achieve the goal, whether it means chomping on someone like a feral raccoon or becoming a military dictator… which puts her in the same mindset as Zaunites, all of whom are desperate to survive and a lot of whom could never afford morals and dignity in the first place.

[ruushes]

sleeping arrangements (not sure tara would ever actually deign to sleep in the same 20ft radius as shovel but who can resist those big shiny insectoid black eyes 🥺)

plus:

[mangomercy]

harrowhark nonagesimus is the character of all time. she weighs 6 stone soaking wet. she doesn’t sleep. she’s 200 dead babies. she puppets her dead mum and dad. she’s a nun. she’s in love with a frozen corpse. she gets a headache when people talk about sex. she wants to die. her bodyguard is in love with her. her weird colleague is in love with her. she gave herself a lobotomy. she’s being piloted by the soul of the planet earth. she loves bones. she wants to live. she makes soup. she watched god have a threesome. she looks like a ferret. this is all canon

[vraska-theunseen]

DID YOU ALL KNOW THAT YOU CAN DO WHATEVER UOU WANT WHEN YOURW MAKING ART ISNT THAT WILD

[andstuffsketches]

um, can you play a song with a beat?

[rationales]