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olipeaksforever · 8 months ago

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Silver Moon Over Sleeping Steeples

Summary: Dale Cooper has escaped the Black Lodge after embracing his doppelganger, but after BOB starts to possess him and try to turn him into the monster Dale never wanted to be, he must come to terms with his flaws and face his biggest fears to reclaim power over his own body again.

Content warning for: mentions of rape, suicide attempts, self harm, substance abuse and weight loss.

Inspired by: @kasparovv 's phenomenal stories of possession series... go read them NOW!!! also david sylvian's song silver moon over sleeping steeples...

You can leave a nice comment here and in the ao3 upload!!

Dale was never so grateful to be back home.

After the worst weeks of his life, he was never so grateful to be back in that cavern he considered home. When he first moved there four years ago, it was a safe and sound place for him.

That stage was always short, the walls quickly echoed his cries and nightly screams, after feeling the same knife stuck his heart over and over again after that night. He remembered the laughter of the person who stabbed him, which now disintegrated and he stopped listening for a long while.

They had finally finished emptying Dale's last remaining box from his now old office. He had put the books back in his bookshelf, the little brown Tibetan cat figurine on the coffee table in the living room, and an old polaroid photo of him, Albert and Diane in 1982 he put in a frame where a picture of Caroline had once lain. Dale sighed, and walked with Albert towards the door. To say he was tired was an understatement.

A week ago, he'd come out of hell on earth, of red velvet curtains and chevron flooring, and when he did, he'd been dead for ten minutes thanks to a hemorrhage he had on arrival at the hospital. When they were able to revive him, the first thing his eyes caught was his family. And not what was left of it, they were all there.

His mother, aged but her hazel eyes were as warm as the last time Dale saw her before the colors were drained from them, was horrified to see her youngest son under wires and breathing masks as she came up to him and put her hand on his cheek, while Dale cried silently, not understanding why his mother was there. She had died twenty years ago and now she was alive again.

The only thing he fully remembered from what his mother said to him was: "I'm just as confused as you are."

She was right. The last thing he remembered of the Black Lodge was when he ran back into his escaped doppelganger in one of those endless hallways. An exchange he'd had with Garland Briggs days ago had motivated him to do what he had to do when he'd gotten into the Black Lodge in the first place.

“Major Briggs, if I may ask a personal question… Do you love yourself?”

“Very much.”

“Then it stands to reason that Leland Palmer didn’t.” What a bold thing for him to say, he thought. Because Dale didn’t want to recognize that he didn’t love himself either, and he failed constantly at it whenever he tried to apply his philosophy on himself.

“One could draw that conclusion. There are powerful forces of evil in the world. It is some men’s fate to confront great darkness. We each choose how to react. If the choice is fear, then we become vulnerable to darkness.”

And so it was that he grabbed his doppelganger tightly by his wrists and looked directly into his empty, pearly white eyes. All that he heard were his own disconsolate cries and screams, crying for help. Then he heard the marks of other realities. He heard Audrey moan and Diane cry, neither particularly in a kind context.

Dale gasped, never expecting that in other universes, his doppelganger would’ve hurt them that way. He was capable of becoming like the people who had taken advantage of him when he was at his lowest, repeating the cycle of abuse he always wanted to break. He finally understood he too was capable of evil.

But he stood still and firm, not cowering after such a shocking and dark reveal. His doppelganger furrowed his eyebrows, and his expression fell, turning more blue. Dale there found a young boy, no older than ten, crying on the floor. He bent down and reached out his hand to the boy's shoulder, and it was him. Dale sighed and helped him to sit up, his doppelganger remaining still.

The boy sniffled and cried, wiping the snot and tears that poured from his nose with his wrists, choking on his tears. Dale sat cross legged in front of him and brushed his back. The boy stopped crying for a second and fluttered his eyes open at the touch. He gulped and muttered: “If I hadn’t told her, she would be alive. I deserve to be alone.”

Dale shook his head no softly and pulled him for a hug, holding his head with his hand, closing his eyes. All of his darkest memories from his childhood to the last weeks of his life came back to him.

The hospital visits that seemed to be endless, the appointments with the dentist that would leave him in more pain than he was before, meeting those hippies, BOB ruining the only safe space he had to cope with his illnesses by abusing him, his mother’s now inexistent death, Marie drowning, his college girlfriends, his first accidental kill at the FBI, the murders in Club Y, Caroline. He had been so alone when those things took place, or under a bad influence, but he wasn’t going to let himself be alone anymore.

“You don’t deserve to be alone, you have me now.” He whispered to the boy, as his doppelganger started to cry. “I love you.”

When Dale opened his eyes again, he was hugging his doppelganger, who was sobbing. Dale finally realized what this meant. Dale sighed and smiled a little, as his doppelganger opened his eyes back up.

"Even if you can cause our pain in other people?" his doppelganger asked cryptically.

"I choose not to. I recognize that I can, yet I will refuse to become like the people who have left me broken because I refuse to continue the cycle." Dale answered him, his hands on his doppelganger's shoulders. His doppelganger nodded his head.

"Then you must leave the institution that won't cooperate in protecting victims like us. Like Laura Palmer. The pain can no longer be ignored if you want to be saved." His doppelganger replied calmly, as if he hadn't cried prior to this answer. He was clearly referring to the FBI, and as strange as he sounded to say that, he clearly understood what he was referring to.

"I understand. You don't deserve the pain." Dale whispered, smiling at his doppelganger fondly.

His doppelganger cried strangely again and smiled. His smile was tenebrous, but Dale remembered getting such a comment about his smile as well. Dale laughed a little, letting out a couple of tears in the process and hugging his doppelganger back tightly.

Light blue lights flashed in the hallway again, and when the flashing stopped, he broke the hug and found Laura Palmer. The real Laura. They both froze completely at the sight of each other and suddenly, an exit to Glastonbury Grove opened up. Dale held her hand and walked out of the Black Lodge with her, but he had no memory of what happened between the time he left and the time he arrived at the hospital. He didn’t know where she was either.

He knew we would always be with her, safe in their eternal retirement at the Black Lodge. Despite their outcomes, he had to thank everything to her. He could get out of there and so did she.

He never thought he’d meet someone like him in his life. It seemed like he and Laura were connected, but he didn’t want to think about that. He just knew he exists thanks to her. He’s glad he got to help her.

He then resigned from the FBI once he was released from the hospital. He gave in his badge, signed all the files he was supposed to sign, his confiscated tapes were returned to him somehow, and he said goodbye to a distraught Diane, an emotional Gordon, and a sad Denise. Obviously he wasn't going to stop seeing any of the three of them, but he would miss their presence in his daily life, and he would miss having the one thing that made him feel alive, like he had a purpose.

Dale could breathe and he could go back to living with others, but he was dead, he had nothing to do now that he gave up his life. Speaking of others, what was he doing?

"Earth to Coop." Ah yes, Albert had helped him unpack his things and organize them in his miserable apartment. What Albert muttered made him break out of his train of thought.

“Yes Albert.” He replied to him almost automatically, blinking. Albert grumbled and huffed.

"As I was saying, you are clearly not fit to be alone in this poor excuse of a house, and your recent disassociation further justifies my decision to stay here with you." Albert mentioned to him, causing Dale's eyes to widen and he put his hand on Albert's chest.

“Albert-”

“ Don’t 'Albert' me, mister. I’ve had enough of you pushing aside your problems like they’re trash. Do you think I didn’t notice your face when you saw your mother again? The way you reacted when Diane kissed your cheek? How you stood here for ten minutes without saying a thing as I explained my plan to you?” Albert complained, Dale sighing and looking down in response. “I’m staying, like it or not. End of the story.”

Dale inhaled, then exhaled, his expression emotionless and his eyes tired. "Albert, we're two adults in our thirties-"

"Get yourself a better excuse, you've got better ones than those. Your birthday is in weeks, in case you've forgotten. You're still twenty-nine." Albert interrupted him, crossing his arms. Dale only frowned in response, upset.

"I think I am capable enough to support myself and recover from what happened to me during the months that have passed with my own means and tools without external help." Dale argued with him, insisting on staying on his own. Albert nodded his head, not wanting to leave Dale alone.

"Oh, so you're going to throw the towel? So soon? You're going to give up on your life just like that?" Albert questioned, raising an eyebrow, disappointed in Dale's attitude.

“Quit pretending I had one outside of the bureau, Albert. You’re talking to a ghost.” Dale’s tone lowered, his voice shaking. He looked down and his frown fell into a pout. Albert’s expression saddened too at the cruelty of Dale’s words, as he blinked and sighed. “Let me die.”

“Dale-”

“Albert, leave.” Dale ordered him, tears pooling in his eyes. “Please.” He opened the door, and Albert stood in the doorframe, his eyes getting glossy too.

“I’m going to help you. I mean it.” Albert muttered, blinking. He looked down and then back up at Dale, leaving.

Dale waited for Albert to disappear into the hallway, and when he did, he closed the door shut and fell to the floor, crying. He hid his face in his hands as his shirt dampened from tears. He had been so cruel to Albert, especially now that he left, he wanted him as far from him as he could. He didn’t deserve someone like him.

How could anyone love a ghost? None of these things were a part of him anymore. Dale was haunting himself everywhere he looked. The Tibetan rug, the vinyl collection, the images of a boy that he wasn’t anymore hanging on the wall. He didn’t know how to be him again.

After sorting through the few things he had retrieved from his office and putting them in his apartment, Dale sighed and decided to take a bath. He removed the curtains and used the bathtub instead, he didn't want to think about curtains right now.

He hated that the smell of medical alcohol had permeated his skin during his last hospital stay, so using one of his special soaps not only removed the scent but also made him feel good. After all, he promised himself that he was going to start loving himself the way he was and take care of himself more often.

After bathing and putting on his pajamas, he felt something unraveling underneath him and he unbuttoned his navy blue shirt open only to find the bandage over his stomach that came undone. He sighed, sniffin, groaning as his body reminded him that his ribs were broken again, the Black Lodge brought him back the pain in his chest and stomach he had forgotten for so long.

He crawled to the bathroom, and opened the cabinet to pull the first aid kit from it and grab some medical tape to secure the bandage back in place. He pulled the bandage tight around his waist, whimpering as he did so, and with one finger he pressed on the end so that he could put the tape over it. He waited for some minutes to see if it came undone, but it didn’t. Dale sighed and placed the kit inside the cabinet again, wanting to skip dinner and spend the rest of the evening rotting in bed.

When he finished, the doorbell rang and he found Albert behind the door with a large suitcase and teary, tired eyes, as well as takeout. Dale couldn’t reject Albert’s offer to stay, so he let him in. They didn’t say a word to each other during dinner.

After dinner with Albert, he brushed his teeth and crawled into his bed, which he missed and longed to get back under his flower patterned sheets. As he got in his bed, he found himself staring at his reflection. Dale walked over to his mirror and touched his face with his fingertips. Was he seeing himself? Was it really him? He didn't remember himself that way. Dale left the mirror and then crawled into his bed and tried to sleep. Albert slept on the couch, as he had all the other times he had spent the night at home.

Dale dreaded the thought of Albert being there when he had a nightmare, of hurting him by accident. With that distance, it saved crying and talking that he didn't want to have at that moment.

Albert was already doing a lot by staying with him to help with his recovery, the thought of putting him through more frightened him. Or to make it more simple: the thought of Albert leaving him scared him to death.

Closing his eyes, Dale began to float. The sounds of the house faded into the background and his body relaxed completely…

…Below him, there was a nest, composed of small thin branches.

The nest was soft, but as he ran his hand along the tips of the branches, a splinter of the branch dug into his hand, drawing a line of blood that spilled down his palm. Dale sat, and looked around with narrowed eyes, the sun was beating down hard at this hour.

In the distance, there was a screech. A screech that claimed Dale, hungry for Dale. The screech came closer, and a huge owl dug its heels into Dale's arms, pinning him to the base of the nest.

Dale gasped in response, trying to free himself from the claws of the bird above him. The hooting began to twist into a wicked laugh.

The feathers grew longer, and the texture soon resembled human hair. The owl's beak began to turn into a nose and a mouth full of fangs. The plumage fell to reveal a denim ensemble and Dale was more than surprised by BOB's appearance in his dream.

BOB squeezed Dale's neck tightly, and put his face close to Dale's, smiling. "Did you think you were free of my torture forever?" BOB asked him, a devilish grin plastered on his face.

Dale was trying to escape, but he felt increasingly sluggish and vulnerable, as if he were in slow motion. BOB was shaking him and throwing himself on top of him, channeling his inner animal.

Dale yelped from the pain, feeling BOB's claws and fangs bite into his skin. BOB continued to grope Dale, feeling his skin bristle.

"You're such a slut. You enjoy this." BOB purred, savoring how Dale was on the verge of tears, denying the affirmation.

"You're unable to scare me anymore. I've defeated you." Dale spat, dodging the temptation to cry. "I'm reliving my darkest moments. This isn't real." He repeated that as if it were a mantra, causing BOB to burst out laughing, slamming his body even more violently and forcefully against Dale's, making him break down in tears.

"How come I can't hurt you if I still remain in your memories?" BOB asked him, removing a dental turbine from his pocket to bring it close to his face, the hum of the small drill buzzing in Dale's ears. "Maybe I won't bother you in reality anymore, but I will always, always remain here." He pointed to his head, then Dale’s forehead.

Dale moaned in horror, the drill getting closer and closer to his eyes.

"Now, be quiet. No one has to know about this or I will find out. Open your mouth." Was the last thing BOB whispered, before the drill made contact with Dale's body.

He woke up with a start the next morning, but no one had to know that he let his guard down in front of BOB. He was sweating from head to toe, and was shaking intensely. He sighed and closed his eyes shut.

He got out of bed to undress himself in front of the mirror, trying to find any traces of BOB, but to no avail.

He was still in the same old body. Lanky build, milky white skin, barely any hair on his chest but his armpits and legs made up for it, a small scar on his stomach, two pink scars at the end of his pectorals and of course, the scar from the stabbing, close to his heart. Dale forgot what it looked like because he'd always listen-

"Caroline!" More screaming. Vision turning black. Blood poured everywhere he looked. Caroline lying dead in his arms.

Dale closed his eyes shut, pretending he didn't listen to any of that. He sighed and put on his pajamas again, staring at himself again to see any change, expecting someone else to be there. His old self, to say a lot. Nothing stared back at him.

BOB himself told him to keep quiet or he would do something horrible to him, even worse, somebody Dale loved. Again.

He walked into the hallway and no one was there. There was a small note on the table in Albert's absence, a note with good intentions telling him he would be back in three weeks because he was in Philadelphia solving a case and that asked him to please not burn the house down in an attempt to make breakfast for himself. Dale burst into tears.

The nightmare felt real, as if he had actually lived it. Memories of his childhood and his visits to the dentist echoed in his head like a cave, much like his home. He still felt the knives in his chest and the dentist's drill.

He tried to make himself breakfast, but he was so disgusted by what he had been through that he threw it all up, and cleaned the bathroom so as not to leave any traces of the vomit.

He called Diane, trying to find someone to talk to without mentioning what happened, not even implicating what was going on in his head. "Is Diane Evans there?"

"She isn't, but you can leave a message!" Her bubbly secretary told him. Dale sighed.

"It's alright. I'll call her later." He hung up and pouted. He didn't have the gut to talk to Albert, and didn't even consider talking to Denise, though she must've been busy.

He tried to sleep his thoughts off, but to no avail. When Albert called him at night to check on him, he put on his strongest face and pretended it had been a great day. It hurt him to lie to Albert, but he didn’t want to put him in danger. Albert raised an eyebrow at the forced smile but brushed it off.

BOB couldn't physically hurt him anymore, but what evidence did he have that proved that? He couldn't tell Albert because if he were to lose Albert by opening his mouth, his life would become meaningless. He couldn't watch someone he loves die. Not again.

He loved Albert and if telling him the truth meant watching him die, he would rather let the pain consume him than lose Albert. He was so terrified of being left alone after it all. Or losing Diane. After all, he heard her voice screaming for help in the Lodge. In another universe, BOB got Diane under the skin of his doppelganger, and did things to her that Dale could never forgive himself for.

Dale then unplugged his phone. He decided to do something to clear his mind. To live a little.

He remembered his old drawings from when he was in college. He went to his small studio and opened one of the wooden drawers of an old piece of furniture that used to belong to his grandmother. Small notebooks with velvet covers lay on top of books and drawing materials he hadn't used in years. Let's see if he could be proud of himself again.

Dale grabbed a notebook and started to doodle, trying to free his mind a little. He started to draw small flowers. Simple to draw yet sweet, the imperfect flower didn't exist. He looked at the bouquets and smiled a little, they looked good. It had been years and they looked more than decent.

He admired the texture the graphite of the pencil left as he drove it across the page, as the petals evolved into leaves, the leaves turning into zigzags, as he lost control of his hand, he closed his eyes and lost himself.

He was floating in a black void, in peace. Dale smiled to himself, putting his hands on his chest. Peace at last, he'd thought. That was until a soft body clashed with his, their shoulders rubbing softly.

He turned around only to meet himself, who was frightened and shaking his shoulders. "Wake up!" He screamed, feeling Dale's bones rattle underneath his grasp.

Dale furrowed his brows and held his own shoulders, staring at himself. "Where am I?" He asked, and then he looked at a young girl with long, raven curls staring back at him. Dale gasped.

"You've got to wake up! We're trapped!" She screamed, and when Dale blinked again, he was an old man in his sixties.

"How?" Dale asked him.

"You're detached from the world." He told Dale, making Dale shake his head and close his eyes. “You have to come back to yourself.” Now, he was sitting on a couch, with a big screen above him. He was seeing himself drawing, almost robotically and expressionless.

Dale observed the situation in horror, knowing he was powerless to stop it. He then saw how he walked to the bathroom mirror and saw his doppelganger staring back at him, smiling, eventually collapsing to the ground, his vision turning black.

And so it was that under BOB’s management, he began to sleep less, his dark circles under his eyes getting bigger.

He ate less, BOB made him sick and throw up everything he ate, making him lose weight in an exaggerated way, his fast metabolism didn't help either, his arms became twigs and his skin turned pale in a short amount of time. BOB would let Dale come back to his body only to see a reflection that wasn't his, deformed, sick and twisted and it would drive him to sobbing.

Sometimes he would be under fat rolls and folds of skin that he never had his angular face replaced with round, puffy cheeks, or he’d see all of his bones trying to break from his skin, his eyes looking like they were about to pop out of his skin. Body horror at its finest. BOB loved showing him reflections of himself that weren’t true so that Dale wouldn’t notice how BOB was changing his body in reality.

His ribs and chest still hurt, and Dale sometimes cried himself to sleep in an effort to rest, when BOB wasn’t looking around. But every time he was caught, he felt those hands on his body again and again.

Back in his dreams, Dale was now in a van with an intense smell of incense, curtains of multicolored beads fell over his eyes. Once he pulled back those curtains, BOB appeared as a hippie, smelling a daisy that then rotted in his hand.

"I see you really took my warning to heart." BOB said seductively, approaching Dale. He sniffed his arms and then brushed his hair, which was getting longer and longer. He held his arm, licking his skin. "You look beautiful now."

Dale pushed him away, annoyed by BOB's comment. "I don't even know why I'm letting some distant memory tell me what to do and treat me like his puppet."

"Oh, you know perfectly well." BOB licked Dale's hand, receiving a grimace of disgust from him. "You really doubt my inability to hurt you physically in the real world, and you know that if I could, and if you'd tell this to your dearest Albert... I'd kill him! I can’t get little Laura Palmer in my hands either, but don’t think my treatment is exclusive to you. You failed."

"You can't hurt me anymore. The evidence for that exists. You're just a nightmare trying to kill me. I won't let that happen!" Dale yelled at him, walking away and standing behind a large magenta lava lamp. "You can't hurt Albert!"

"But I'm not hurting him. You are . You're a terrible person! You're lying to him about this. Keep it up, and not only will Albert leave you, but you'll die, and you'll be just like me!" BOB shrieked, pulling his face close to Dale's and kissing him intensely, leaving teeth marks on his lower lip.

Dale pushed him again, but BOB squeezed him tightly in his arms to keep him from escaping, then hit him and kissed him again.

"Now, Dale... Don't forget to do your homework. Or else I'll fail you." BOB joked, as his laughter melted around the flames eating at the hippie van, the incense fading from the atmosphere. "I want to see you again."

Somehow, when Albert came back, BOB left. The first thing Albert said to Dale was: "Coop, I’ve noticed lately that you've decided to speak the language of silence and haven't addressed a single word to me since I came back here. Fuck , since I left. Your parents are worried, Diane has been hysterical… What the hell happened?"

Dale sniffled, and nodded in response, looking at the floor. Albert brushed back his growing mop of hair and grimaced, which quickly disappeared when he saw the weariness in Dale's eyes.

"Is it the medicine? Have you been having nightmares and not telling me?" Albert would ask, holding his slender hands in his. "You haven't been eating either. You're a bundie."

"Albert, maybe you shouldn't blame the medicine and my dreams for my condition." Dale whispered, avoiding looking at Albert. "Blame me for not taking the medicine."

"Why the hell don't you take it?" Albert asked him, annoyed. Dale shrugged and shook his head.

“I forget. I haven’t been myself lately and I’d like to apologize for it. The events of the last month have taken a toll on my mental health and I’m still trying to process it. Do I have to explain it to you any further?” Dale asked him, followed by a sniffle. He was half lying, and hoped Albert didn't catch it.

“Hey. Look at me, Coop.” Albert ordered him, putting his hand on his cheek, Dale’s hazel eyes meeting Albert’s almond eyes. “I'm not doing this because it's my job, I'm doing this because like it or not, you matter to me. You aren’t talking for some reason, but you trust me well enough to tell me what’s going on inside that mind of yours. You’re drowning and I’m here to pull you out of the water, because you don’t deserve to go through this and your recovery is fundamental to me.” And Albert was right, like always.

He feels like he's drowning, falling deeper and deeper into the darkness, hoping to see the light above him waiting to reach him and wrap him in a warm embrace. The light is there for him though, and in the form of a cynical agent by his side, helping him to heal to enjoy the life he always wanted to have.

Dale smiled a little, feeling tears gathering in his eyes. "Thank you, Albert." Oh, Albert. Always so kind and thoughtful despite his vocabulary. Dale didn't know how to repay him after all he's doing for him.

"Don't mention it." Albert hugged him, and Dale's smile grew even bigger, feeling safe in Albert's arms, away from any pain and any torture from BOB.

BOB would, when he could, make an odd gesture with Dale's body that was enough evidence for Albert to hold Dale's hand for a while, mistaking the possession for a panic attack or distract him with some of his vinyl records playing in the background. Dale sometimes spent more time trapped in his mind than in the real world with Albert, between versions of himself, the past and future in one single place.

Over the next few days, Dale started taking his medicine, and he didn't have as many nightmares as before, and he was eating again without feeling nauseous.

Unfortunately, his cheeks and stomach were still swollen from constant vomiting. It was very noticeable in contrast to how thin and small his body had become.

Sometimes, but not often, he would fall asleep on the couch watching some rerun of a romantic movie, and Albert would stroke his head or wish him sweet dreams, something he enjoyed and looked forward to doing the same to Albert when he had the chance (and something he didn't know if Albert noticed he remembers it). How he loved to be touched this way.

BOB stopped showing up for a while when one day, Dale decided to do something to deal with his identity crisis. He tried drawing again, but this time he drew Albert, and he was in total control of his body. He smiled when he could see the finished product without interruption. And so it went on.

The nightmares unfortunately persisted, attempting to frighten Dale with BOB tearing his face from his body, putting it on and killing people. These violent images were followed by BOB swearing to Dale that he would turn into him. Dale found that his days however, kept flowing the right way even after having these nightmares. At no time did he ever feel trapped in his mind again.

Sometimes he was even able to be in total control of his body when he was alone, as he learned how to fix holes in T-shirts he used to love and how to make omelets with cheese. He slowly felt like he was human again and the feeling was amazing.

He rediscovered traits of himself that he had forgotten he loved, and discovered new ones. Since when did the tips of his ears turn red when he smiled? The tip of his nose always twitched slightly when he talked? Did his hair look that good without gel?

He was back to experimenting like he did as a teenager, and had never felt so comfortable in black latex harnesses strapped to his chest or ever thought eyeliner looked so good on his eyes. He was reaching levels of joy and peace with himself he'd never thought he'd reach. Dale was becoming more and more in awe of himself, as if he was rediscovering himself all over again.

Part of what made him slowly find himself, or be himself again, was all thanks to Albert. And Dale started to notice things about Albert that maybe he hadn't paid much attention to before, like how long his lashes were, or the dimples in his cheeks. Maybe he was falling for Albert again. Maybe he was the one. And he's lucky Albert wasn't home when he would lie on the couch and day dream about the two of them together, blushing and smiling to himself.

He was becoming a whole new different man, different from the FBI Agent people either wanted to marry or to kill, he was finally becoming himself.

One night, after Albert came home from work a wreck and they had shared a mood-enhancing dinner, they decided to indulge themselves and had bits from a can of beer sitting in the fridge. They were now in the living room, both on the verge of falling asleep, with Dale sitting cross-legged on the sofa and Albert curled up in a ball on the couch in front of Dale. Dale smiled a little as he saw Albert's figure on the couch.

"Don't laugh, Coop." Albert grumbled, rubbing his eyes and frowning as he got to look at him. "I'm more than aware that my back will be like an accordion if I spend the night here on this couch."

“Right.” Dale chuckled, rubbing his own eyes too.

“If it were for you, you’d sleep here and in the morning, your first words would be something along the lines of: ‘Albert it appears that my back aches after I stole a goose’s golden egg.’ Am I wrong?” Albert imitated Dale, making him giggle at how accurate yet inaccurate his imitation of him was. “I don’t know, I didn’t study acting at Oxford. I’m made of wood.”

“I can see.” Dale added, making Albert chuckle and roll his eyes.

"I'm so glad we're on the same page. Can you put on some music?" Albert suggested. Dale got up and walked over to the library where they had vinyls, singles, cassettes and cds of various genres carefully organized by alphabetic order and pulled out a David Sylvian vinyl.

Albert frowned, as he looked at the vinyl. "You really want us to sleep, don't you?" Albert grumbled, rubbing his eyes.

Dale blinked and smiled a little. "I've been wanting to listen to my favorite song with you again. It's been years and…" Dale stopped in his tracks and looked down at the floor, blinking. "May I ask if we could lay down on the floor and let us be consumed by the beautiful mystery that is this vinyl as we enjoy what is left of the night?"

Albert sighed, and grabbed the second record inside the ambient pop and put it in the vinyl player. He couldn't say no knowing what it meant for Dale, especially the last time they heard it together. He remembers Dale crying over a love that never was in Albert's arms, as his sobbing subsided and he fell asleep, forever grateful Albert had been there.

He arranged the pick so it was in the middle of the vinyl and they lay on the floor, a melancholy but beautiful melody making the living room disappear, letting the stars and moonlight envelop the room, the dark blue shadows painting their skins and Dale could see the moon in Albert's eyes. It was silver and it shone against Dale’s face. A beautiful sight to see.

Dale sighed and smiled from ear to ear, looking up at Albert. Albert turned his head to look at Dale and swore he saw a million little stars in his eyes. Albert laughed at the idiocy of seeing a galaxy in Dale's eyes, but at that moment, it was the closest he would ever get to space and wanted to enjoy it.

"What?" Dale asked him, furrowing his eyebrows but not diminishing his smile.

“Are we in space?”

“And you’re complaining?” Dale asked him playfully. “Albert, I’m surprised.”

Albert chuckled, and shook his head softly. “Damn this music.” He sighed, staring at all the little planets above him. "You're right, it's been too long."

Dale nodded, intertwining his fingers with Albert's, as his fingertips had brushed his. Dale blinked and sighed, the music taking them deeper into the galaxy. They were now two stars in clouds of different shades of blue, floating in the dark sky, alone.

Dale wouldn't have wanted it any other way. It's everything he ever wanted.

"Dale?"

"Yes, Albert?"

"I know." Albert whispered with a tiny smile, gazing at Dale. Dale's heart stopped as he looked at Albert with wide, worried eyes.

Dale gulped and blinked, the clouds disappearing around them. "I was looking forward to the perfect moment to open up to you." Dale mumbled, looking down.

There was a short silence, and Albert was being wrapped in a white, almost angelic aura. "You wanted to be anywhere else?" And Dale knew he had finally made it.

Dale's eyes were shining bright out of pure emotion, and sighed, smiling widely as he shifted to hug Albert, being consumed by the light and then falling into the darkness. He was floating in peace at last.

Everything seemed to change for the better until one day, after taking a bath, Dale looked at his reflection in the mirror and cried out in horror at the sight of his face. His hair was now down to his shoulders, he couldn't remember the last time he had shaved and he hadn't trimmed his nails either. Why didn’t he notice this before?

And that's when he realized that BOB was right. He had become BOB, physically speaking.

Dale felt shivers down his spine, and decided to crawl back into his bed. A haircut and a shave would fix this.

It was painful to walk back from the bathroom to his room. His screams pleading for help could be heard down the hallways, and Dale closed his eyes, thinking he would stop hearing them.

He covered himself with his sheets and blankets, and closed his eyes, trying to count sheep.

Dale then woke up in a house, and Caroline was standing in front of him, worried, in a hurry. She was walking in and out of the living room, with a black coat in her hands. Dale saw a picture of him and Caroline, smiling. A photo that didn't exist, it looked like a collage of older photos of the two of them, since he never had the chance to take a photo with her.

Caroline sighed, and crossed her arms, standing in front of Dale. "Are you even listening to me?" She asked, impatient.

Dale frowned. "What do you mean by it, Caroline?" He asked. "I may have missed-"

She huffed and rolled her eyes, throwing her arms to the sides. "You always miss everything. You miss something that you never and will never have." She told him in a tone completely different from the one Caroline used to speak in.

Dale then saw a baby in his arms, who giggled and smiled at him. "What's this?" Caroline only groaned in response and stomped.

"Jesus, Dale! Always forgetting things! She's going to starve if you don't feed her!" Caroline complained, making Dale stand up and take a few steps back, shaking his head no.

"I can't feed her Caroline, you know that." Dale replied to her, staring at the squealing baby once again. "Perhaps if-"

"You're incredible! Always making excuses for the things you've hidden!" Caroline yelled, snatching the baby from Dale's arms, as she started to cry. Dale shook his head, shedding a few tears. Whatever reality or jail he was stuck in, he wasn't sure if he could stand it any longer.

"Caroline, please." Dale pleaded, his wife huffing and trying to calm down their child. He saw a collection of records sitting by a table on the left of the couch, and picked a random one, hidden between vinyls, speaking to Caroline. "I apologize for my lack of understanding in this situation, I'm just at a loss of words of what to do. I shouldn't be here."

Caroline rolled her eyes once more, watching how Dale put the record on. "You're a faulty man, Dale Cooper. Look at how evil consumed you." Her words were like acid, biting at his skin, his bones and joints disintegrating by it. It wasn’t Caroline, yet the way this new reality worded her to make her sound angry made Dale wish he hadn’t met her in the first place, again.

The music started to play. Dale turned around to look at the spinning record. A familiar melody. A composition that sounded like hope. Angels floating. Tears filling the room. A bond and connection that transcended universes. He remembered standing by Laura’s side, with a reassuring hand on her shoulder. Her guardian angel.

He turned around only to find himself, with bones poking out of his skin and long black hair, naked on the floor, curled up. Caroline and his inexistent daughter were nowhere to be seen. He had to come back. He shook his shoulder and before he turned his head to look at him, he felt a chill going down his spine and opened his eyes.

When he woke up, a blue light filled the room and he felt himself lose all the security he thought he had under the covers. BOB pulled the sheets and bedspread off Dale's bed, and kissed him, biting his neck and then holding his face with his hand.

BOB smiled, showing his fangs stained with Dale's blood and pressing hard against his legs. "I told you you'd be like me." He purred, pawing Dale by his stomach and legs as he moaned. "Still think you're the victim?"

Dale closed his eyes from the pain, moaning and groaning, and shook his head softly. "No." He whispered.

BOB laughed, and pulled Dale's t-shirt off his body, and began kissing his scarred chest, making him squirm from the pain and humiliation.

"Don't cry yet, my little monster boy. This isn't over yet." BOB whispered, then to hold Dale's face.

"I'm not crying." Dale answered him, extremely vulnerable.

"Not yet." BOB clarified, tracing circles with his fingers on Dale's back.

"I didn't tell anyone about us." Dale said between small moans of pain, his eyes glistening with tears.

"Excellent. You're making great progress." BOB brushed the lanugo growing on Dale's body, then kissed him back only to break their kiss. "I regret to inform you that this is the last time we will see each other."

And when he finished speaking, Dale jumped on BOB, and began to choke him, his tears falling on BOB's face.

"Go away! I won't let you hurt me ever again!" Dale screamed, as BOB laughed disconsolately.

"You deserve the pain! You wouldn't be here if you hadn't hurt others! If you hadn't hurt Albert!" BOB shrieked.

"That's a lie!" He yelled back.

"You're a terrible, selfish brat, Dale Cooper. You're always too late." BOB purred.

“No-”

“You were born too late, she was already dead when she wished for your help. You were already dead when you wished for a true friend. Can’t you see it?”

“I understand! Leave us alone!” Dale pleaded, as BOB shoved his fingers inside of Dale, making him tremble and scream. “Please!”

“When I kill you, I’ll get Laura Palmer next. You can’t save her anymore.” BOB whispered to him, making his hand out of Dale and kissing him, as Dale succumbed to the pain and cried, thinking it was going to make it stop.

"Please leave me alone." Dale pleaded, his voice no higher than a whisper, choking on his tears. "Please. I'm a good man."

"That should be engraved on your gravestone." BOB whispered in his ear, biting his earlobe. Dale grimaced, making BOB press him harder against the wooden floor and kiss him, sealing his mark. When he broke the kiss, BOB smiled. "You've been nothing but a perfect host these past few weeks. A real pain in the ass too, you couldn't let me have any fun. Luckily, all that didn't happen to your friends: it happened to you."

Dale cried, before BOB could kiss him again and couldn't hold his eyelids anymore. His body went limp afterwards, floating in the darkness once more. He heard BOB before he woke up. He had whispered: "Who will you see in the mirror, but not yourself?"

BOB shoved Dale back to the bed by pushing him from his chest and then removed a knife, causing Dale to freeze in horror, staring at Windom Earle's reflection in the metal of the knife.

"I won't say goodbye without killing you first, my dear Dale. Say hello to Caroline for me." BOB said to Dale in Windom's voice, and began stabbing him in the chest, hearing Caroline scream in the background, and then his own screams.

"Caroline!"

Dale woke up with a jolt, and he was sick of it all. He was sick of the dreams, sick of the raping, how BOB made his traumas and experiences worse by showing up in his memories.

But it was too late to tell Albert about it. The damage had been done.

Now Dale had become his abuser, and he had to die. He didn't want to be like BOB, that was one of his worst nightmares. He turned back towards the bathroom, echoes of past nightmares echoing in the hallways, and looked in the mirror.

He saw only BOB's reflection, and Dale began to cry softly.

He was horrified at his new appearance, he was a monster now. A monster who didn't deserve to be loved. Someone who'd let his guard down and failed. Again.

And when he thought things couldn’t get worse, the phone rang. He picked up the call and heard a familiar voice. "Dale, do you need me to help you?" It was his mother, and his eyes immediately watered when he heard her voice.

Dale shook his head, clearing his throat. "Mother."

"I've dreamed the same thing you have. You haven't been free of him at all." She reminded him. "You have distracted him, but he saw you yesterday when you were with Albert." Dale's heart sank at the last part.

"Mother, don't do this. Please." Dale pleaded, his voice thin but growing louder with frustration. "I've already lost you once to that monster. I don't want to go through that again."

"Then for how long will you let him hurt you? Until your mind is scattered somewhere in a dark corner of the universe?" She asked him, her voice sad but serious.

"I don't know how!" Dale cried, wiping his eyes. "I don't know what's wrong with me. I thought I had fixed it all in the last months… But I haven't got a clue on how to get rid of him for eternity."

The line went dangerously silent and Dale's eyes rolled back. He saw himself through a big screen, and saw how he hung up the phone, then unplugged it. He walked to the mirror and saw how BOB was using his face to smile at him.

"Time's running out, little boy." BOB whispered with Dale's face. Dale blinked and he was back in his body.

He went back to his room and started dialing Diane's phone. He had to say goodbye to her and everyone he loved, they didn't deserve someone like him.

"Hello?" Diane's secretary asked Dale.

"Hi. This is Dale Cooper. I wanted to know if Diane Evans is around."

"She's busy, but you can leave a message." The secretary carelessly told him. She must've had a new secretary.

Dale sniffled, and nodded. "I'd appreciate it very much if you'd turn a deaf ear. It's personal and I'd be humiliated if anyone else knew about it."

"...As you say." She replied to Dale in a disinterested manner, as Dale cleared his throat.

Dale inhaled deeply, then exhaled and sighed. "Diane, you are surely busy solving some extremely interesting cases, and that makes me very proud of you. You deserve to rise higher and higher in that position because you are a phenomenal woman and I admire you so much, Diane." Dale began, letting a couple of tears fall. "You're funny, you're strong, you're brave... Sometimes I'm sorry you had to go through such things in your life like sexism in the workplace before you got where you are today, and I wish I could have done more to lift your spirits when you felt blue about it. You are very beautiful and sweet and I have questioned myself in several instances what I have done to deserve someone like you. You have been one of three of my closest friends, the ones who really saw me for who I really was and who have shown me that I am not the monster I think I am. You have helped so much and I will never, ever forget what you have done for me. Having someone listen to my rambling, ranting… Having someone who'll listen to what I feel and I have to say…" Dale stopped to sniff, and then cleared his throat. His voice breaking. "Is something that I've been granted very little in my short life. I shouldn’t have used you as a therapist as much as I did instead of being honest with my therapist. I’m sorry. Don't blame yourself for this, because I promise you that you have done nothing wrong. I want you to grow up, show everyone who's the boss, and always make yourself an excellent cup of coffee like I would have liked to have had. I love you, Diane. Goodbye."

Dale heard snoring on the other line, and cleared his throat loudly, waking the secretary.

"Would you like to leave that message?" She asked him, alert.

"Please. Tell her to listen to it right away as soon as she gets back." Dale asked the secretary. Once she saved the message, he cut the call short and went into the living room to tear a sheet of paper from his notepad.

He grabbed a pen, and began to write a letter to Albert, all the while crying inconsolably. Tears blurred his handwriting, ink spilling over the sides of the letters.

When he finished the letter, Dale read it. It read as follows:

Dear Albert:

The last few years have been some of the most beautiful in my life.

Meeting you was an honor, and sometimes you think you are a hard person to love because of your attitude. You are surprised that I still put up with you despite your cynical and bitter personality. I have never seen you like that and I wouldn't expect you to be anything less than what you are.

You are an admirable man, I could never do what you do without throwing up or fainting first.

The world needs more people like you. Your heart is pure and kind, and you really follow your ideals. You say things like they are, without watering them down or cherry picking information, you go straight to the point.

Regret is a word I'd use to describe the way I behaved towards you when you attempted to show me the dark surface of Twin Peaks. Now I understand what you meant by it. I wished I had seen the truth earlier. Or way before Twin Peaks. Words that I've said, letters I've written, things I've done. Too many regrets. You deserved a better friend.

Good is not a word anyone should use to describe me. If anything, it suits you more.

There's something I don't know if you knew, Albert. But your name has the most beautiful meaning in the world. I was reading about it the other day and forgot to tell you.

Albert means "bright," and Rosenfield means "field of roses." Your name means "bright field of roses," Albert. Isn't that beautiful?

Roses are a symbol of love, and I don't think there has ever been a human being as loving and as committed to spreading love around the world as you, Albert. Or a name more fitting for you.

I love you, Albert. I don't think I can find all the right words to express myself the way I want to express myself about you, but every time I see you, I feel safe and loved. I look the way I look and do the things I do to avoid a terrible fate for you. The possibility of you dying in BOB's arms.

I protected you by doing this. I did what I couldn't do for Caroline. Though I must admit that I let my guard down by letting BOB do terrible things to me in my nightmares. They felt too real, Albert. Pawing, biting, licking, torturing, no traces were found every time I woke up but his presence had been there.

They weren't those types of nightmares where you can easily figure out that they're not real. He picked my darkest moments and inserted himself in them. Including that night in Pittsburgh. He replaced doctors, hippies, even Windom Earle, and inserted himself in them.

A disturbing sight to many, but for me, it seemed like watching a gateway to hell opening upon my eyes.

My mother already died twenty years ago trying to protect me as a helpless, sickly ten year old who was just learning how the world worked, and I didn't want you to pay that price. And now, because of me, she’s back. But the print her death left in my mind can’t be erased like her death was from this world.

Evil never dies. I couldn't let BOB hurt you, or Diane. Not even my friends back there in Twin Peaks.

Thank you for everything you have done for me, from the day we met until last night. I want you to stay true to your word and keep loving people, doing everything you do for love. It was my choice, and never blame yourself for it, please. You did nothing wrong, you just tried to help. You tried to help a shell of a broken man.

I love you, Agent Rosenfield.

Farewell,

Coop. x

It took Dale hours to write that letter, and when he finished it, he sighed and went outside to buy a rose for Albert.

When he returned, it was already evening, the sky was dark and the moon was up, and he was deeply grateful that no one made any comment on his appearance. He left a white rose on the table next to the letter, and headed for the bathroom.

Shouting in the hallways told him not to, not to do what he was about to do, that he didn't deserve that, but he heard again that animalistic laughter that was so characteristic of BOB as he stood in front of the bathroom mirror.

Dale opened the bathroom mirror compartment, finding a bag of razor blades. He removed one from the bag and closed the mirror, only to find BOB standing behind him, smiling.

"It's already done. You're too late." BOB growled with a devilish smile. Dale whimpered, staring at BOB’s reflection in the blade.

"Dale?" Albert asked him from the hallway, making Dale shiver. Dale jumped and started to cry and scream loudly, dropping the blade. He attempted to close the bathroom door. He choked on his tears, BOB pressing his thumbs against his neck, a sight invisible to Albert, who was trying to hold Dale’s shoulder.

Dale's eyes turned pitch black, and when he managed to open the door of the bathroom, before losing his humanity to BOB, he mumbled his last words to Albert: "Please forgive me."

The bathroom turned into his cage, his body now locked inside it. Dale stopped crying and his face turned into stone, walking over to the bathtub and turning on the water. Albert's loud thuds and warnings didn't stop him. Dale put on the plug and when the bathtub was almost filled, Dale submerged himself in it, letting the water clog his nostrils, falling into the dark…

…and into the old hallway of his house. Dale heard choked crying from his bedroom. He opened the door to find a little girl crying. Vaporub sat on her nightstand, and her starry comforter was drenched in sweat. Dale walked over to her and brushed her feverish forehead, and was met with a pair of scared, hazel eyes.

Dale turned his head to the window, unable to face her. But the sight on the window wasn't a better choice. He was seeing BOB drown him in his own bathroom, while Albert attempted to get through the door, his muffled screaming coming from behind the door.

Dale heard loud banging coming from the door, and the girl began to cry, almost choked cries. He remembered this. The first time BOB had tried to possess him. Dale sighed and had no choice but to look her in the eyes. The girl sniffled, rubbing her eyes.

"I'm so scared." She sobbed, covering her face with her small hands. Dale nodded his head and put his hand on her knee.

"Afraid of what?"

"Of becoming like him." She answered him, swallowing hard. Dale turned his head and watched as her body lay deep in her tub, completely motionless. “I don’t want him here. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

Dale didn't know how to answer her. The banging was getting louder and louder behind the door. BOB began to laugh, as the room began to engulf in flames, causing the girl to shriek and Dale to become alarmed that BOB was about to burst through the door to his room. In the real world, Albert was trying to unlock the door with keys and cards of any kind, silently crying.

"Dale, open the door!" Albert shouted, trying to unlock the door with a crowbar, but to no avail. He couldn't pull the door down with his own weight either. He was running out of time.

They were both running out of time. Dale realized that he only learned to love part of himself, that he had not yet faced his worst fears, nor accepted his shortcomings. His eyes filled with tears as he watched the girl cry. He hugged her tightly and put his chin on the top of her head.

"I'm so sorry." Dale murmured. "You deserved so much better."

“I just want to feel better.” The girl croaked, coughing. Dale remembers how worried he would get when he got sick, how close to death he felt every time he was bedridden. Dale then remembered the vaporub on the nightstand, and carefully removed her shirt, as he rubbed the green gel over her chest. The girl inhaled, and exhaled, as her breathing evened.

“Thank you.” She squeaked, as Dale nodded, the heat of the fire catching up to him, the sensation of BOB’s nails clawing on the doorframe. Dale gulped and shed a few tears, he was staring at his own past, and he was letting himself lose against BOB.

“You’re welcome.” Dale muttered, blinking a tear. The little girl frowned and sniffled.

“Why are you sad?” She asked him, wiping her cheeks. Dale coughed and cried, as he covered his face with his hands, the fire starting to burn the bed.

“You’re me. A-and I can’t come into terms with my mistakes, I can’t come into- I lost against him.” Dale stuttered, failing to tell her what was happening around them. “I ignored what was actually killing me on the inside and I let him hurt me.”

The girl gasped at the revelation, her eyes growing wide at the adult in front of her. She put her hand on Dale’s cheeks and whispered: “I’m going to get better?”

He felt his heart shatter at that question alone, and he hugged the girl tightly, his tears falling on her head, sobbing loudly. The fire began to burn the sheets, and Dale began to lose oxygen, coughing more and more sharply. The water filling his lungs, Albert still failing to open the door, still not giving up.

But Dale remembered her question. Am I going to get better? He was right. He did get better. Dale was able to get BOB away from him for a while, he refused to become BOB. Dale refused to become a BOB puppet on multiple occasions, beyond that in the last few hours, he failed pathetically. Dale had to face his fears and accept the fact that he too can do evil and that he’s imperfect. He had been imperfect, but with that question alone, he realized his imperfection and lack of acceptance of the fact that BOB was still after him and took him to the solution that might save him.

He accepted that all his decisions and mistakes took him here, and decided to take the responsibility for it. He could finally save himself. He would never be like BOB, and so he smiled at the girl and nodded his head, brushing back her black bangs. "It's going to be alright. I'm here to take care of you."

BOB started screaming, as the fire was put out by water. Dale furrowed his eyebrows and looked toward the window, his body underwater coughing and trying to get back to the surface. He was regaining his autonomy.

The girl sniffed and hugged him tightly. Dale pulled her inside his bed and held her hand, brushing gently. He got up and saw how BOB’s burned fingers were scratching the door. Dale grabbed the door handle and closed the door harshly, listening to BOB’s fingers crack, as he managed to close the door, not a soul in sight. He wasn’t going to let him hurt her. He walked over to the bed again, and saw the girl lying on the bed, almost falling asleep.

Dale smiled and kissed her forehead, as he crawled over to the bed and hugged her. “Goodnight. I love you.” He whispered to himself.

Dale started coughing, trying to get out the water that had clogged his throat. His body was all pink from the heat of the water and his damp hair covered his view. Dale climbed out of the tub and coughed the water out in large quantities, feeling BOB's hands on his neck.

"You're not getting out of this alive!" BOB shrieked. Dale couldn't distinguish between his tears and the drops of water falling on his forehead, he then made Dale grab the razor blade he had left earlier. "This is it." BOB whispered, as Dale watched the razor between his thumb and forefinger.

BOB giggled, rubbing his hands together as Dale sniffled, putting the tip of the razor into his wrist, he traced it gently, letting out a cry of pain at the sight of the little red line. Dale screamed, dropping the razor to the floor, feeling the demon trying to take control over his body. He clawed at his face to get him off of him, drawing angry red spots on his face, but BOB pulled him down to the floor to then punch him hard in his face, painting part of his lower face red.

"Albert, help!" Cooper cried out disconsolately, feeling Albert unlock the doorknob as fast as he could. Dale was back in his old room. BOB was approaching the cabinet and removing the mouthwash. He looked at BOB's reflection in the bathroom mirror from his window, watching as BOB opened the mouthwash and drank it.

"You have become what you swore to destroy." BOB growled. Dale heard the door creak from behind him and saw that it was slightly opened. He turned his head to look at the sleeping girl and stood up. He finally had enough.

He went through the door and grabbed BOB’s jean collar, piercing his soul with his eyes. "I did, and I'll make sure whatever I broke is repaired with everything I learned, acknowledging its flaws. I’ll never be you." And Dale punched BOB, proving to him that he changed and fought with his own set of rules against his game. "You'll never have me."

Dale started choking on the liquid, and then felt two fingers go down his throat harshly. He vomited all the blue liquid into the toilet, and when he could breathe again, Albert was on top of him, holding his naked body next to the toilet. His face was exhausted and stained with tears. Dale sighed and blinked, then shrieked from the horror and humiliation that Albert found him hurting.

"Wait." Albert opened the bathroom cabinet and quickly removed some disinfectant, cotton and a bandage for Dale's wrist.

Albert sat with Dale on the floor, and looked him in the eye, trying to help him. Dale, looking for support, looked him in the eyes in response.

"Show me your cut already." Albert ordered him, as Dale removed his hand over his cut. Albert sighed and put pressure on it, making Dale moan.

"Sorry-"

"Save it, Coop. There will be time for that. Now I want you to calm down and listen to me. It's a thin cut and not deep at all, you should be thankful I'm not taking you to the hospital." Albert interrupted him, removing his hand to then disinfect the infamous red line. Dale cried silently as Albert cleaned his wound.

"My god. First of all, drowning, then an attempt at self mutilation followed by choking on mouthwash. You're lucky I found you before you took this to the extreme." Albert grumbled. And he was right again. Then he put a clean white bandage which he tied tightly around Dale's wrist.

Dale could tell Albert was definitely upset because he had been lying to him, and because he definitely heard what he had told Diane earlier today.

When he finished, Dale fled to his bed, followed by Albert, who sat across from him. Dale didn't dare look Albert in the eye.

"What the fuck happened, Coop?" Albert asked him, annoyed. "I read your ballad and smelled the rose. You know Diane made me listen to that voice mail too? You know how tired I am of your attempts of being a hero with your white knighting?"

Dale nodded his head, pouting.

"Why, Coop? Why the hell are you doing this?" Albert asked again, feeling tears making his eyes glisten at the sight of Dale's suicide attempt.

Dale tried to say something, but just burst into tears, dropping an absurd amount of tears per second. He pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, as he softly rocked himself back and forth. Albert had never seen him see Dale cry so hard before. Not even when Caroline died.

"It wasn't a decision I should have made, but I had to make it." Dale blubbered, as he hid his face from Albert. "I let him hurt me, Albert. To protect you."

"I know." And ever if after reading the letter he knew, Albert still couldn't believe it.

"Albert. The reason I am now a hideous monster is because of BOB." Cooper stopped him, staring at him in the eye. "He'd rape me in my dreams when he had the chance, and forced me to remain silent or else he was going to hurt you. Evil can never really leave, Albert. I can never be too sure about it." Dale sniffled, then looked away. "My mother died after I told her BOB tried to get through the door in my dream. She died protecting me, Albert. I can't risk losing you. I'm tired of seeing my loved ones die. These dreams were too real a-and I wasn't going to take the risk to tell this to you, because this already happened to me when I was a child."

Albert furrowed his brows, as Dale clinged tighter onto his shoulders.

"I love you, Albert. You make my days brighter when you're around, you're like a warm hug to the soul after what seemed to be a long and eternal winter. I value everything you've done for me and I still fail to comprehend why you're still trying to help after everything, you're too good to me. I'll never be the man you deserve in your life." Dale sobbed. "And if I lost you… I… I didn't know what I was going to do. I wrote the letter taking in consideration the possibility of a scenario where it was too late for the both of us."

Albert blinked, shedding a few tears, and pulled him tightly into a hug, feeling Dale tighten his grip on his suit jacket. "It hurts me too to see you this way, you know? I’m not taking this lightly either, Coop."

"The vomiting and my absurd weight loss were courtesy of my nightmares and BOB inhabiting my body. I felt disgusted when I ate. Every time I looked at myself in the mirror, a different person was looking back at me. That's in the past now obviously, but the nightmares turned me into BOB. He turned me into my worst nightmare, his best prized thing." Dale looked down in shame. "I look like a beast."

Albert brushed Dale's long hair, and his eyes then went to Dale's face. "Coop, this can be fixed. You're not that fucking succubus, and you never will be." Albert reminded him, breaking the embrace and placing his hand on his cheek.

"How can you love a monster, Albert?" Dale asked Albert, whimpering.

"I don't want you to ever say that ever again, OK?" Albert barely raised his voice, then gently hugged Dale again, holding his head. "You're not a monster. Do you think I believed you wanted to dream with him, that you were looking for it?"

"But look at me!" Dale broke the hug and threw his arms to his sides. "BOB made me become this, and I hurt you by lying to you! And that’s why I wanted to end my life…”

Albert sighed, and brushed Dale's hand with his thumb, getting Dale to look him in the eye. Albert blinked, letting a few tears fall.

He was going to bring Dale out of the darkness, and was going to help him feel better. He knew how much of an effect Dale's mother's death had on him. How BOB would hunt him down and do terrible things to him, ever since he tried to get through the door in his dreams. He believed him, and he wasn't going to pretend that it wasn't real because it was real for Dale, and he was close to death again.

"I hope you won't make an attempt in justifying me, Albert. I was wrong and I take responsibility for my actions. I recognize it was wrong that I lied to you. You don't deserve that." Dale muttered, hiding behind his hair. "Albert, you shouldn't feel guilty about abandoning me. I know you understand that you should have ignored me and stayed anyway, but if that had been the case, BOB-" Dale started to say, painfully trying to sit on the bed.

"Dale, no. Stop it." Albert stopped him. "You're not doing anything by playing as a white knight, you just end up killing yourself more and more, damn it. Are you even listening to what you’re saying?"

“No. I- No…”

"I wasn't going to abandon you anyway, Dale." Albert whispered, crying quietly. "With that being said, there's nothing more horrible than watching you suffer alone. You were scared. You don't deserve that either."

"Solitude is the answer, Albert. I can't hurt the ones I love anymore. And it's selfish of me to let you stay here, with me. But I love you. But this is so wrong." Cooper weeped, then sniffled, looking Albert in the eye. "I feel so lonely. And it hurts to be, but I suppose I'm destined to be alone. I'm just bad news. I understand whatever decision you may take."

"You're never going to be alone, damn it, Dale. I'm here." Albert confessed, crying. "You're not alone, you have me, Diane, Denise. You're quite the literal definition of a flutter bum, and I swear, you're not a monster, Dale."

"Albert-"

"No, you let me finish." Albert interrupted, his two hands firmly resting on Dale's shoulders. "I admire you, and I care too much about your well-being to leave you here in this pigsty of suffering, your deepest terrors eating at you everytime you're at your lowest. Your feelings matter to me. You matter to me. You are my friend, and you always make an admirable effort to understand me, when many have simply ignored me or cast me aside because of my cynicism. So, with more reason I should be here when you're at your lowest. And quite frankly, Diane has been telling me for years to cut the crap and tell you that I loved you."

Dale shook his head softly, his mouth turning into a sad grimace, looking down at the guilt and the truth of Albert's words. Dale sighed and sniffled, letting tears fall from his eyes, his face being covered by the long locks of his hair. Albert wrapped his arms around him, letting him cry. Dale just sunk his face in Albert’s shirt, thinking it would erase all the pain.

"Sorry Albert. You don't deserve this." Dale blubbered, in an attempt to modulate his feelings with honesty. "I just don't feel like a human being anymore. I lost all my humanity, and in every corner of this house, there's something that belongs to a dead man. There's nothing that I consider mine. Almost as if I’m not here at all."

“But you are.” Albert whispered, making Dale raise his head at him. “And there’s no way in hell you are going anywhere next.”

Dale shook his head no, gulping. “But I’m not here for myself, I’m still running away. Albert, I’m a trainwreck of a man and I don’t know if someone like me will ever have the chance to live among people ever again.” Dale mumbled, parting from the hug.

There was a long silence, with Albert staring at Dale, waiting for an answer, and Dale looking down, expecting Albert to say the truth again. Albert reached out for his hand, and squeezed it softly. “Coop, you are . You wouldn’t be here talking to me if you hadn’t woken up. You wouldn’t allow BOB to fuck with you anymore. You survived. I don’t know what the hell you did to get away from him, but you’re a survivor. You’re here for you.” Albert reminded him, and Dale swore there was a soft, blue light emanating from behind Albert. He swore he blinked and there were angels, flying above him.

He blinked, and he was sitting in the White Lodge, with blue curtains falling over him and blowing softly, as an angel that looked like Albert flew above him. Laura was there for him, hugging him. He remembers her angel too back there in the Black Lodge, and finally realized. She was safe. And so was Dale.

And that’s when Dale realized why BOB would vanish every time Albert was around. Albert was good. Albert was from the White Lodge. He was his angel. Laura was his guardian angel just like Dale was hers.

“We’re alright.” Laura whispered, her voice soft and gentle, her eyes glossy. “We’ll be together in every universe.”

Dale smiled, for the first time in a long time, and cried tears of joy, closing his eyes then again to absorb the situation, and he felt his body relax once more, realizing that he was here. He was here for himself at last, coming back home to himself after decades. He reached the White Lodge, somehow. He was going to be alright.

In reality, Dale had fallen asleep in Albert's arms, feeling his thumb stroke his back. Albert just tucked him in bed again and stayed with him until he also fell asleep. Dale didn't stir nor scream once in his sleep. BOB never reappeared in Dale's dreams since that night.

From that night on, everything got better. Eventually, Dale's cheeks and stomach stopped being swollen, but he was still too small for his height. Albert's cousin had become his new psychologist, and he began to make positive progress.

"Albert, due to the circumstances I am in and after much consideration, I have decided that moving out of this pathetic little apartment would be beneficial to my health." Dale told him a few days later, concentrating on making a pancake without Albert's help.

Albert was on the couch, reading the paper, when he raised his head and then walked over to Dale, putting his hand on his hip. "About time."

And now Dale had to say the complicated part of this whole affair. "While you've been working, I've been thinking about moving somewhere up north, not close to Twin Peaks. I've thought about going back to my home state in Pennsylvania, but there's nothing left for me there anymore. Not even with my now reunited family." Albert nodded his head at that. Dale inhaled deeply and then exhaled, blinking.

"Philly's nice." Albert added, though he considered that Cooper staying out of Philadelphia would be a better option.

Dale's old green house had resurfaced, and there was nothing more horrifying than a ghost showing you photos from the universe that had slid through whatever crack Cooper saved Laura might've created. Graduation photos of Dale smiling with his mother and his diploma in one hand, for example. Albert couldn't sleep that night after he saw them. They weren't meant to be real.

"It is, but I can't go home anymore. It brings back bad memories." Dale sighed, flipping the pancake carefully, hearing the mix sizzle on the pan. "And I like it here in the northwest. I like peaceful, little towns with forests and lakes."

"Not stepping a foot in one anymore." Albert mumbled, sipping on his coffee.

There was a silence, as Albert poured coffee into his mug, and Dale gulped, ready to share his proposal to Albert. "When I get the chance to move out, I'm going to be very lonely and I'm afraid I'm going to need a roommate." Dale cringed afterwards by listening to his own awkward words. He tried to fix it, by saying: "I don't want to be alone."

Albert nodded his head until his eyes suddenly grew wide as he realized what he was implying. Dale blinked, thinking it made him uncomfortable. "I'd really like to move in with you there, Albert. I-I know you’re not into that small town business, much less after, you know but- All I desire is to be with you." Dale stammered, turning off the fire of the stove and putting the last pancake on the plate.

Albert thought, and yes, he was tired of his apartment too. Besides, he wanted to be with Dale. He loved him very much, and he was still his friend. He could trust that Dale could now be alone with his own appliances, but if BOB still wanted his friend, he couldn't be alone. Albert was going to move mountains and earth for Dale. He loved Dale.

"What follows is to make an in-depth investigation of where we want to live. No loud cities for you, no small town big secrets crap for me." And so Dale's smile widened and he hugged Albert tightly, happy that Albert had accepted his proposal. Dale was on cloud nine.

Some time after that, they decided to settle in a house in Crescent City, a small town in Northern California filled with greenery, where Redwood Forest was located. It didn't take long with the move. After an entire day of organizing Dale's astrology books and Albert's comic books, Dale's dream pop cassettes and Albert's jazz singles; from Dale's blankets of every variety to Albert's t-shirts, starting with Albert's French cookbook and ending with Dale's telescope standing near the shared bedroom window, they collapsed on the orange couch, one on top of the other in a way that their bodies were unwilling to cooperate in getting up.

After they were settled, with Albert coming back home from work every night thanks to the bureau, Dale started to look for people like him dressed with his newfound confidence, but not exposing much of himself either so as to not attract strangers. Among zines that were sold down the street and small interactions at the supermarket, Dale met new people who he sensed were a good influence to him, and people who he felt good with. From Charlotte the transsexual woman who was once a biker in the sixties that would shop for groceries at the same time as him, to John the preschool teacher who had complimented the drawing he had done on a practice afternoon in the local park.

He began to feel better about what had happened to him while doing little drawings and poems, something that made him feel better, rejoicing in his progress and ability of healing. He also wanted to help others, boys and girls who were in the same situation as him. Not out of guilt, but to ensure they’d least have someone to rely on or talk to when they felt alone or helpless. And so he decided that he’d start to help other victims like him, like Laura, who he still didn’t forget about and wouldn’t anytime soon. He’d do it when he was in a better physical condition.

Unfortunately, The week after they moved in, Albert got assigned a case where he had to be outside of California for a month. Luckily, Diane had offered herself to look after Dale, who was still pretty rough after what happened.

When Diane arrived at the new house, first her eyes quickly glanced around in surprise. Unlike Dale's old house, it didn't look dark and grim. It had warm colors and muted earth tones that were somehow convincing enough for Albert, who hated colors like that. It was cozy and comforting, and everywhere you looked, it looked like it was Dale and Albert’s house. From the tibetan rug to the french cuisine book Diane had bought Albert for Christmas in 1985.

Then, she hugged Dale tightly and slapped him. "I don’t give a shit if I shouldn't have done that or not, but damn it Dale you sure have a hard head!" Diane whined, as Dale rubbed his cheek.

"I had it coming sooner or later, Diane. You didn't deserve that. However, it's worth noting that my emotional state now-"

Diane sighed, brushing back Dale's hair which was even longer than before and was close to reaching his elbows. Then she looked at his face and that measly excuse for a mustache drawn on his face with five facial hairs.

"Jesus, Coop. You have that awful mustache and Albert didn't say anything?" Dale blushed in embarrassment.

"I know, even Albert hates it. Surprisingly, he did nothing to stop it. However, for the time being I wouldn't go near any object that would allow me to shave it off." Dale clarified, and Diane dragged him into the bathroom.

Then she brought a chair from the study and sat him down, to put a towel around his shoulders. She grabbed a pair of scissors and a razor, and looked at Dale in the mirror. "Be honest, Coop, you wanted to do this with me." Diane came clean with him, causing Dale to grin from ear to ear and look down in embarrassment, his cheeks flushed red. "Good. As it should've been."

Diane cut Dale's hair, leaving it the way it looked before he went to Twin Peaks. Next, Dale shaved the hair growing above his lips and around his cheeks and chin with Diane's assistance.

He trimmed his nails without much difficulty, and when night fell, he looked in the mirror and smiled, hugging Diane. Diane returned the hug, and what was left of that evening consisted of watching movies playing on TV and Diane gossiping with Dale about her work. When Diane left, the phone started ringing. Dale crawled into his bed, and answered the call. "Special- Dale Cooper."

"At least you're my Special Agent. Former Special Agent, but you're mine anyway."

Dale grinned from ear to ear, blushing pink. "Albert!"

"I decided that calling at the same time every night would do you good, because I was still planning to call you anyway to make sure you're not doing anything out of the ordinary. I'm calling from a grubby hotel in the middle of antsville USA. To say I'm frosted about it is an understatement." Albert mentioned, followed by a huff.

"Anything else?" Cooper asked him with a smile, fiddling with the phone cord.

"Hell, I can't keep anything from you! I wanted to annoy Diane too but it seems that she ran away." Albert confessed, making Dale laugh.

"Sorry Albert, but sometimes it's so easy to read your mind." Cooper sighed. "Other than your complaints about the hotel, how are you?"

Albert sighed. "I miss you. Nothing out of the ordinary, obviously. I'm starting to worry too much, but luckily it doesn't last more than two minutes."

Cooper's smile faded. "Oh, Albert. Please don't do that. I have enough of that happening to me." Cooper mused.

"I'm not doing it on purpose. I'm not going to be like you, Dale. I don't want you to worry about that." Albert told him, then cleared his throat. “But these last months have been a hell for me too.”

“I know, Albert. And I’m sorry.” Dale apologized. “We made it without any major issues, I'd like to think. If there's something that's making you uncomfortable please don't hesitate to mention it to me."

"I could say the same. I hope that when I come back you don't have those four-"

"They were five hairs." Cooper corrected him with a smile.

"Were? Diane didn't keep that mustache not even to piss me off?" Albert asked him.

"No, she hated it too, believe it or not. But I shaved it with her watching me, so my poor excuse of a mustache is part of the past."

Albert raised his eyebrows. "I have to go Coop, sorry to cut you off. The sheriff here at Horse Shit USA is going to have an interview with me tomorrow morning, and I have to be prepared. Lucky me."

Dale nodded. "Okay. I love you, Albert. Goodnight."

"Godnight to you too, Dale. I love you too." Albert wished him, hanging up the phone. Dale glanced at his phone for a little before turning off the light and falling asleep.

In the next few days, Dale has never felt so much love and joy for himself. He had gained the weight he had lost and he considered he looked even better than he did before.

Of course, sometimes he didn't feel as bright as he did before, but he was finally achieving what he deserved for so long: inner peace with himself and his life. He started to pick up on old hobbies of his, including performing small magic tricks, and the joy was infinite. He’d write love letters to himself when he didn’t feel well, but never signed them with his name. He even tried to meditate and never had a single vision or visit from BOB.

Albert kept calling every night, keeping his promise. When he didn't, Dale wouldn't worry much because he knew Albert didn't have to do that every night either.

When Albert came back from the case, he heard not a single noise from his boyfriend. He smelled something from the kitchen. Food. French cuisine. Nothing was burning. Not a sound of Dale around the house.

When he walked into the kitchen, he saw Dale, cooking, nothing burning. A strange sight to see. Dale turned around and yelped, startled by Albert. He had his hand on his heart, and was panting.

"Jesus, Albert! You scared me." Dale let out a sigh.

Albert scanned him from head to toe. He looked very similar to the man he knew before he went to Twin Peaks, but he looked more like… Dale. Not Special Agent Dale Cooper. Just Dale. And he loved that.

Albert smiled and hugged him tightly, as Dale returned the hug, wrapping his arms around Albert.

"I missed you too." Dale whispered, as he brushed Albert's short hair. He broke the hug and smiled shyly, looking down. "I made noodles with parisienne sauce. Just how you like them."

Albert's eyes were blown away. "Wait really? Diane wasn't kidding when she said you started to-"

Dale giggled and looked down, then looked up at Albert again. "And Diane wasn't kidding when she said you were attracted to it."

Albert blushed red and huffed. "Of course she did. I'll help you fix the table. Stop standing there smiling like a goof, Dale."

After they set the table, they had dinner, which consisted of Albert ranting about his latest case followed by bits of compliments of Dale's cooking, and then Dale telling Albert how he'd spent the days while he was away.

"Anything else aside from painting your sorrows into canvases?" Albert asked him, rolling some noodles into his fork.

"Connecting and socializing with other people like me. Helping them out, doing what I couldn't do for the ones that aren't here anymore. I finally realized I can't change the past." Dale admitted, drinking out of his glass of wine.

“Took you long enough.” Albert told him, earning a nod from Dale. They must've brushed their hands once or twice while at it, and lost count of all the times they had gazed lovingly at each other.

After they had done the dishes together and Dale had gone to brush his teeth, Albert petted a cat, who was half asleep on the end of Dale's bed. When Dale came back, he smiled and brushed her back, making her yawn and jumping out of bed.

"So it's safe to say that's your emotional support animal?" Albert asked him, taking off his watch and suit jacket.

Dale shrugged. "More or less. I wanted to have a pet for so long. Nellie is just perfect. I must mention to you that she needs guidance, she's blind in her right eye, I'll tell you later what to do to make things easier for her." Cooper pointed to his right eye. "Now that I am not even the slightest bit overworked as I had been when I worked at the Bureau, I can look after a small individual now."

Albert raised his eyebrows and sat by Dale's side. "This is not how I expected your proposal of having a child to be like."

Dale laughed, shaking his head. "Oh no, Albert. I could never be a father. Look at mine."

"Don't think too much about it, me neither. My father was in and out of my house all the time." Albert confessed, as they sat silently, glancing at each other's eyes; both losing themselves in their irises, seeking for warmth, for love.

"Albert I would very much like to kiss you again, if you give me the permission to do so." Dale broke eye contact, as Albert rolled his eyes and huffed, breaking into a smile.

"Then do it." He told him, removing his suit jacket. Dale only smiled and leaned over Albert's face to connect his lips with his, fingers finding Albert's navy tie and undoing it.

Albert closed his eyes, as he pushed Dale to the back of the bed, their bodies starting to intertwine and touch.

Now with most of his body exposed, Albert undid the orange shirt Dale had on, then the white t-shirt he wore underneath, finally getting to his exposed torso, kissing every nook and cranny when he had the chance to do so, making Cooper moan in pleasure, kissing Albert's neck.

"Fuck, Coop. Has anyone ever told you how fucking beautiful you are?" Albert whispered, as he felt his pants slide down his legs. Eventually, he made Cooper's pants disappear somewhere underneath the bed.

"Yes. In more than one instance." He mumbled, being interrupted by Albert's kisses. "Please, go on."

Dale moaned, closing his eyes, gripping on the bed sheets. Albert leaned over to kiss his lips, brushing his cheekbones with his thumb. "I've dreamt of this." Albert whispered, biting Dale's neck, making him yelp. "More than once."

Dale nodded, smiling, feeling Albert inside of him, almost as if they were one. Dale couldn't believe it for one moment. It was too perfect.

Albert then started to kiss his chest softly, but heard Dale squirm and freeze, stopping what he was doing. Albert looked at his naked boyfriend underneath him, and brushed his cheek. "Do you want me to stop?" Albert asked him. Dale stared at him and sighed.

"Not really. I'd rather have you doing it more gently, if that isn't a problem." He replied to him, as Albert laid by his side and started to brush Dale's chest, glancing at him lovingly.

"Is there anything you don't want to do?"

"Oral. Penetration. Just not now. Maybe in another instance." Dale clarified to him, petting Albert's head.

"So nothing too wild? Want to keep this pretty vanilla?"

Dale smiled brightly, dazed from earlier. "That's not even wild for my standards. With that being said, I do love kissing. I like it when you kiss me, Albert."

Albert leaned over him, planting kisses across his face and jaw, hearing him giggle underneath. Dale followed by kissing Albert too, wrapping his arms around him, holding him.

Albert thinks Dale's beautiful, he deserves to have this after the last months which have consisted of nothing but a reenactment of his traumas. He deserves to be happy and it relaxes him that Dale seems to have finally achieved it.

Dale also believes that Albert is beautiful, he's moved by the fact his feelings are returned and that despite everything, despite being a man that doesn't seem real to many, he is loved and felt that way. He can't believe he got where he had wanted to be for so long.

Dale stops, feeling Albert lay over his arm and fixing his position so that Dale can remove it. Dale snuggled in his chest and blinked. "I love you so much." He whispered, feeling the warmth of Albert's body.

"Idem. I missed listening to your rants about Tibetan food in this shitty case I was in." Albert replies, stroking Dale's hair.

Dale smiles and laughs softly, drowsy and still in shock about what he did earlier. He puts his hand close to Albert's cheek and brushes it, making Albert blink.

"Have I told you how beautiful you look under the moon, Albert?" He then sighed, kissing Albert's cheek.

"Your medication must be kicking in because that's not the truth. Keep dreaming, Coop." Albert comments, holding Dale's hand. "Should we get you a new mirror?"

Dale shakes his head no and kisses Albert again, short but sweet. "No, Albert. I mean it. You're beautiful."

Albert blinks again, in disbelief, and smiles as he presses a kiss on Dale's cheek. Dale smiles and kisses Albert once more, and then his nose softly rubs Albert's neck. Albert wraps his arms around his waist and pulls him close, putting his chin over Dale's head.

"Missing you was an understatement." Albert whispered, hearing Dale hum.

"I know." Dale blinked a few times, snuggling closer into Albert's touch. "I can't believe it, Albert."

Albert's fingers started to softly brush Dale's hair. "Can't believe what?" Dale raised his head to look at Albert and smile softly.

"That I'm finally living the life that I've been seeking to have for so long. That I get to have you." Dale whispered, a huge smile forming on his face, his eyes shining like a thousand little stars.

Albert didn't have the words for once in his life, so he just kept stroking his hair, letting him look at Albert warmly. How he missed that smile of Dale's. How he loved to see that he had finally found peace after so long. Dale then sighed and snuggled again in Albert's chest, Albert sinking his head into his pillow.

Dale found him staring at him for too long now, and giggled, followed by a short yawn. "What?"

Albert shook his head softly, Dale falling asleep in his chest. Dale knew exactly what Albert was feeling. "It's just the way I smile…" Dale whispered, succumbing to a peaceful sleep, a big smile on his face. Albert wouldn’t want anything else in the world.

#twin peaks #dale cooper #albert rosenfield #rosendale #past the peaks #twin peaks fanfic #my fanfic #posting this on here too

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xxdragonwriterxx · 4 years ago

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🔥I’m Done Playing Games So I’m Going Down in Flames (Mafia AU)🔥

A/N: Okay so I’ve been reading a lot of Mafia AU’s lately and now I’m obsessed. I’ve always loved this AU but some amazing recent fics have revived my soft spot for them so I decided to give a shot at my own! If you want some absolutely top notch Mafia AU Levi fics to read, go read the stuff from @mysteriousmagicx and @ackermans-freedom-inc! They both have fantastic work all around and inspire me all the time. Thanks for the support and enjoy!

🐉 Song Recommendation: “The Search” By: NF 🐉

~~~

‘Damn, she’s still working isn’t she?’ Levi thought as he looked up from the crime thriller he’d been reading, his brow furrowed as he glared at the closed door of their bedroom, waiting for his girlfriend to finally come to bed with him.

He glanced at the clock and sighed when the little red numbers told him it was already 3 AM. While he greatly admired his girlfriend’s work ethic and stamina, always getting everything done efficiently, he also hated it. She tended to let her responsibilities take over her life, working until she collapsed and neglecting to take care of herself until every project was done for the day, which unfortunately, always seemed like a never ending list.

Levi got up, determined to get her to relax, even if he had to force her to. He was worried about her, her boss dumping way more work than usual on (Y/N) as the company she worked for struggled to overcome a recent financial obstacle. He knew it was important to her, and he definitely didn’t want her to lose her job, but this was the sixth night in a row in which she hadn’t slept more than an hour or two and it was starting to get on his nerves.

He missed having her warm presence in bed with him, lulling him to sleep when his insomnia normally troubled him until the early morning hours. He missed waking up to her sleepy smile and half-lidded eyes, her gaze filled with love as she gave him his good morning kiss. He missed seeing her bright eyes and energized personality, going on runs with him or laughing as she cooked something mouthwatering in the kitchen. Now, (Y/N) could barely do more than give him a tired kiss on the cheek when she trudged home from the office before collapsing on the couch in a desperate attempt to catch up on sleep, only to wake up an hour later to continue her grueling assignments.

Slipping into the hallway, Levi padded quietly through the dark until he reached her office door, the golden light spilling out from underneath it and the sound of clacking computer keys floating through the wood. Raising his fist to the door, Levi knocked three times and waited as the sound of typing faltered only to be replaced by the sound of her chair scraping along the wood floor.

When (Y/N) opened the door, Levi had to stop himself from wincing. She looked absolutely drained. Her skin was paler than usual, almost sickly in the golden light, her cheeks were sunken in a little, her cheekbones protruding from her face as if someone was stretching her skin, and dark circles made her look as if she had been punched, displaying her exhaustion under her eyes clearly for anyone to see.

“Hey, Levi, I’m almost done, okay? Then I’ll come to bed, I promise,” (Y/N) said with a tired smile, fighting back a yawn, not even needing him to speak to know why he was here.

“(Y/N), you look like shit,” Levi said.

(Y/N) smiled wider at his blunt response and shook her head at him with a chuckle. “Thanks, Levi, I try.”

“I’m serious,” he said. “You look so tired I don’t even know if you’re really awake. You could be sleep walking for all I know.”

“I know,” (Y/N) sighed. “But I have to finish these reports before tomorrow, otherwise my boss will kill me. Why don’t you go back to bed? Try to get some sleep? I’ll meet you there soon, I promise.”

“Join me in twenty minutes. If you’re not done by then, I’m dragging you there and tying you to the bed.”

“Oh, how forward,” (Y/N) teased.

“I mean it, I’m not letting you kill yourself over work. You need to sleep and if that means forcing you to relax, then that’s what I’ll do.”

(Y/N) nodded, her shoulders slumping as she made her way back to her desk. She knew she needed to go to bed, and she wanted more than anything to snuggle up to Levi and let his warm protectiveness lull her to sleep, but she also wanted to make sure she had done the most she could possibly do before she retired for the night.

Settling back into her desk chair, (Y/N) almost felt like crying in frustration as she woke her computer up again, envying the damn machine for getting more shut eye than her. She could feel Levi watching her from where he was leaning against the doorframe, his intense gaze burning into her back, but she ignored the urge to cave and started typing again.

After a few moments, Levi eventually left again, closing the door behind him as he mumbled something about keeping his promise of dragging her away. (Y/N) smiled despite herself at her boyfriend’s antics, his love and concern for her giving her the strength to keep working.

________________________________

Levi scowled at (Y/N) over the rim of his tea cup, frowning at the dead look in her eyes. He had eventually gotten her to come to their room the night before, but he knew she had tossed and turned for a significant portion of the night, thoughts about her job and the stress that came with it, keeping her up.

He wanted desperately to help her with it, to maybe even take some of her workload for her so she could finally get some damn rest. But he didn’t know anything about budgets and profits and organizing trade deals. (Y/N) worked for a company as their assistant manager, making sure everything ran smoothly and handling the organizational parts of running a business, which was where the majority of her work came from. His annoyed growl made her glance up at him, the low noise snapping her out of her zoned out state.

“Everything alright, Levi?” (Y/N) asked sweetly, blinking a few times and digging into the bacon and eggs in front of her in an attempt to wake herself up more.

“No, it’s not. You’re working too hard and I’m worried about you.”

“I know,” (Y/N) said softly, her fork dropping to hang limply from her fingertips so she could twirl it on the edge of the plate. “But unfortunately we are going through a rough patch right now in the company, so I’ve been having to work double time to make sure things get back up to speed. Assuming it gets better, I’ll be able to relax more when things calm down. My boss is just panicking at the moment, so I’ve needed to step up to provide her the support she needs to get us through this, which means extra hours.”

Levi knew what she said made sense, but he still couldn’t help being unhappy about it. He missed when (Y/N) was lively and bright-eyed, telling him about her day and giving him the affection he pretended to find annoying. Hugging him, kissing him, combing through his hair with her fingers, and smiling because she knew he loved it anyway. Grunting in acknowledgement, Levi took another sip of his tea before reaching for a strip of bacon, attempting to ignore the unusual silence that filled the house.

Levi wished he could be there to support her more. She obviously wasn’t taking care of herself, and he wanted nothing more than to pull her back to bed and snuggle with her, ignoring her protests as she only put in half the effort to escape from his warm embrace and go back to work. But he too had work that day and didn’t have time to slide back into bed with (Y/N), no matter how tempting that may sound. As if someone was reading his mind, his phone rang and when he looked at the number, he nodded to (Y/N).

She nodded back. She knew when he nodded to her that it was a work related call for him. She watched as he stood from the table and made his way into the other room, his voice echoing back as he told the person on the other line to stay on target until he got there. Standing up, (Y/N) put away their dishes as Levi hung up and made his way to the door, grabbing his jacket on the way out.

(Y/N) gave Levi a quick hug and a sweet kiss on the lips right before he walked out the door, waving to him as he made his way to his sleek black car and drove off. She watched until he was nothing more than a black speck in the distance before shutting the door and immediately heading back to her office to finish her work.

___________________________________

Levi was sitting on the couch, his hands clasped together with his elbows on his knees as he poured over the papers on the glass coffee table at his estate, his eyes narrowing on the text.

“Fucking idiot. At this rate, we’ll have no choice but to face him,” Levi muttered angrily, glaring at the photos and documents in front of him.

Erwin sighed from the arm chair across from Levi, his fingers reaching up to rub at his temples where a headache was starting to build. “I know, but you know he won’t stop, not until he gets what he wants. If we keep dodging this, it could lead to some major territorial issues, should another group decide we are being too lax with our borders. We need to put an end to this, right now, before it gets even worse.”

“But doing so will put us in the spotlight, Erwin,” Levi countered. “You know as well as I do that, although being famous in the criminal underbelly has its perks, being well known outside of that bubble can be detrimental. If we go through with what Zeke Yeager is requesting, we will be completely exposed; to the media, to the public, to the police. It’ll be a slaughter, and we’ll have to give up our territory anyway.”

“I know,” Erwin muttered, slouching in his chair. “But we have a similar outcome if we don’t follow through with his demands. He’s got us cornered, and he is obviously willing to go to any length to make sure we cooperate.”

Levi growled and glared at the photos again, the images making his heart pound. While he was alarmed at the sight of them, he was not surprised that the photos were of (Y/N). He had tried his very best to keep her out of his mess, to keep her bright light from being swallowed by the darkness he ruled, but he knew realistically that there was no guaranteed way to keep her safe. Alongside the photos of (Y/N) were also photos of Erwin’s lover Emily, her smile beaming as she took a walk on a beach or had a lunch date with (Y/N), the two of them having been friends since high school.

He hated to admit it but the photos were proof. Both he and Erwin were most definitely cornered, Zeke taunting the two powerful mafia bosses with the safety and survival of their respective lovers as if it were a game. Levi wished he were strong enough to fight against Zeke, to come off as unaffected, but he wouldn’t risk (Y/N) for anything. No matter what happened, if it guaranteed her life and safety, he would comply. He supposed that made him seem weak, something that would’ve made his past self scoff in disgust, but he couldn’t change how she made him feel and how unconditionally he loved her. If protecting her meant the end of him, either as a mafia boss or in life, then so be it.

______________________________

Levi didn’t let himself regret anything as he shouldered on his jacket, his eyes roving over the things he’d laid out on the bed in preparation for this meeting. He knew he should probably be trying to think of ways to outsmart the rival mafia leader, finding ways to kill him and continue expanding like he had been doing for the past several years. But as he packed the few things from the estate he thought he would need, his thoughts were only focused on his gorgeous lover, her warm smile and contagious laughter filling his senses.

He sighed. He knew she wouldn’t understand, and he feared she would do something rash in response. But he trusted Hanji, the only one he had told about this meeting aside from Erwin, to keep her safe for him. He tried not to think about it too much, what (Y/N) might do when she found out about what was about to happen. She had left early for work that morning, giving him the perfect opportunity to write her a lengthy letter telling her how much he loved her and how none of it was her fault. He knew the letter was far from adequate in explaining everything to his beloved girlfriend, but it would have to do.

Strapping a single small pistol to his belt, Levi gave his room one last glance before pushing through the door, nodding to his members as he passed them in the hallways. All of their expressions were grim, all of them knowing the same thing. Today would be Levi’s last. While nobody said anything to their leader, their hearts were heavy as they watched him leave. Despite what they did for a living, Levi was well known amongst his subordinates for caring for them in his own way, always protecting them the best he possibly could and offering council when necessary.

Levi could feel their eyes on him but he spared none of them a glance aside from the occasional nod or slight wave. He didn’t stop to talk to anyone, even Erwin, who he’d convinced to stay behind to protect the estate, just in case Zeke used this as an opportunity to take over the powerful crime syndicate. Levi was willing to give up his life to protect (Y/N), but that didn’t mean he was willing to wave a white flag either, refusing to bow to this cowardly piece of shit just because of his threats.

Levi pushed through the glossy wooden front doors and slipped into his car without looking back, only looking up to give his driver the address Zeke had given him after a brief interaction over the phone. The sleek black car pulled out of the drive and picked up speed after sliding through the large open gate, the passing trees flashing by in a blur. Levi looked out the window for a minute, his silver eyes taking in the beauty of nature for what he assumed to be the last time, the sun glinting through the leaves of the trees to dapple his lap with sunspots. He saw rolling hills and glittering streams and children playing in the park, their laughter echoing temporarily in his ears before the speed at which they were moving snatched the sound away. He saw a big dog chasing a ball and immediately thought of (Y/N), quickly swallowing the sudden lump that formed in his throat.

She had always wanted a dog. The two of them had lived together for long enough that they had started to talk about it, but Levi had always shied from the idea, not excited in the least about having a messy, loud animal in the house with them. (Y/N) had teased him but had never pushed the issue, aside from the one time she had offered to get him a cat if he got her a dog, shoving down her disappointment and respecting his wishes for cleanliness. Little did she know, despite his attitude, he had secretly been excited to share something like that with her, wanting nothing more than to see her beaming smile as they picked a furry friend to love together. He wished he had done something like that with her sooner. Now, she was going to be in that house all by herself, with nobody to keep her company or help her process her grief.

His heart tightened and he looked away from the window, his eyes trained on his lap as he focused on his breathing. He never expected to feel this way, like he was drowning. He never expected to fear his lover’s reaction to his death more than the death itself, although he surmised he shouldn’t have been surprised, he had always valued her welfare over his own.

“We will take good care of her, sir,” Mikasa said from behind the wheel, her eyes trained on the road as she continued to drive steadily to their destination, making Levi look up in surprise. Mikasa had always been a loyal member of his group, but he had continuously butted heads with his cousin over her obsessive compulsion to protect her boyfriend, Eren, another member of the syndicate. He had never expected her to care about (Y/N) or him, nor to even notice that (Y/N) was the origin of his turmoil.

His eyes lowered back down onto his lap and he swallowed hard. “Thank you.”

Mikasa shrugged in response but he could tell it wasn’t as nonchalant as she was trying to make it look, her shoulders tense and her hands gripping the steering wheel a bit harder than normal. Silence filled the car again as Levi went back to thinking about (Y/N), even pulling out his phone to look down at a beautiful picture of her, one where she was smiling at him while at the beach, wearing an adorable bikini and holding her sunhat to her head to keep the wind from blowing it off while the ocean waves crashed behind her. She looked so happy, her smile making his heart flutter and his stomach churn just as it always did when he saw her.

All too soon, Mikasa had pulled onto a cleverly hidden gravel drive and parked in front of an old abandoned warehouse. His heart was thundering in his ears as soon as the purring of the engine cut off. Levi took a deep breath and opened the car door, slipping out while Mikasa stared straight ahead, her breathing labored as she fought against the surprising appearance of tears springing to her eyes.

As soon as Levi shut the car door, Mikasa restarted the vehicle and put it into reverse, her eyes meeting Levi’s briefly as she crawled back onto the street before she sped away, Levi standing in the drive until the sound of his car had given way to silence. With Mikasa gone, Levi was able to release his shaky breath, his eyes scanning the beautiful forest he was standing in, the trees arching high and protecting the land below with thick canopies that blocked most of the harsh sunlight from the flourishing foliage, giving the forest floor a beautiful spotted look, the sun winking at him from the space between the leaves.

It was time. Taking in his surroundings one last time with an appreciative deep breath of the warm pine smell he and (Y/N) both loved, Levi headed into the warehouse.

“Good bye, (Y/N). I love you.”

_______________________________

Zeke was grinning so wide his cheeks ached as the door to the warehouse opened, revealing a very angry Levi Ackerman. The Torva Messor. The Grim Reaper. He had never expected in his entire life that he would be able to get rid of one of the most dangerous mafia bosses in the world so easily. It was almost laughable, how quickly Levi had submitted to Zeke after he had threatened his lover.

It had taken years to find Levi’s weak spot, the man always just out of reach and seemingly untouchable with no family or friends to speak of that weren’t already in his gang. Zeke and his men had spent countless hours searching for a crack in Levi’s impenetrable armor, some of them even leaving to find a new boss, claiming Zeke’s obsession with the raven-haired man was both unhealthy and futile.

But Zeke had never given up, always waiting patiently for the one day when he would find something, and everything would fall into place. He was determined, and had no doubt in his mind that a day such as this would come eventually. Despite the skeptical nature of his followers, he never lost that spark of hope that he knew would one day lead him to power unlike any other.

The day he had discovered (Y/N), he had thought he was dreaming. It couldn’t be that simple. A lover? Levi would never take one of those, always too busy and too cold-hearted to even think about love. He was a mafia boss for fucks sake, how the hell was he supposed to juggle a lover at the same time? But against all odds, Zeke found it to be true when he tracked her and found her with him, the two of them sharing loving embraces and playing off of each other smoothly. It was then that Zeke realized he had finally found his opening, the crack in Levi’s armor where he knew his arrow would strike home, and just as he had expected, the most feared man in the criminal underbelly had yielded immediately.

“Well, well, well,” Zeke cooed as he pushed away from the wall he’d been leaning against when Levi came in. “If it isn’t the man of the hour! Welcome, welcome, Levi!”

Levi gave a nearly inhuman growl in response and walked to the center of the warehouse before stopping, his eyes never leaving the bearded man in the room with him.

“Jesus, where did you learn your manners? Do you speak to (Y/N) that way, hmm?”

“Don’t say her name you filthy cock-sucking bastard,” Levi snarled.

“What are you going to do about it?” Zeke taunted, pulling a gun from his holster. “Shoot me? Call in your cronies and have me violently killed?”

Levi stayed silent, knowing that one wrong step could render this entire mission pointless. Unfortunately, (Y/N)’s life still rested securely in Zeke’s grasp. If he wished, he could send his men to find and kill her in the worst way possible. He might even be sadistic enough to force Levi to watch.

“That’s what I thought,” Zeke practically purred, coming right up to Levi and running the gun from the shorter man’s temple down to his side before moving in front of the shorter man and placing the muzzle of the gun directly over Levi’s heart.

Levi swallowed thickly once, the only sign that he was even remotely concerned, his eyes remaining clear and narrowed on Zeke’s gleeful face.

“Goodbye, Great Torva Messor, may your death bring about a better world.”

Levi closed his eyes and thought of (Y/N), her bright, happy face floating through his mind one last time before the sound of the gun going off blasted through the warehouse. It wasn’t what Levi was expecting, surprisingly painless as he felt himself falling backwards.

_______________________________

A scream had his eyes shooting open, his mind frazzled as he found himself on the floor but with no bullet wound. He pawed at his chest in confusion, almost as if the wound was hiding from him, the blood waiting to bloom under his shirt until he uncovered it. But he found nothing, his chest solid and whole, his heart hammering loudly in his chest.

He wasn’t dead.

Quickly looking around, Levi found Zeke on the ground facing him, his jaw slack and his eyes glazed in death, his hand still clutched around his own heart and covered in blood.

“What the fuck-”

A quiet groan made him look up, and his eyes widened at the figure crumpled to the floor, their hand clutching their side as blood seeped between their fingers, their hair curtaining her expression.

“(Y/N)!!! HOLY SHIT!!!” Levi didn’t hesitate to scramble to his feet and sprint over to her, his hands immediately reaching out to hold her to him, to assess her injuries, to do something, anything to help her.

“I’m fine, Levi, I’m fine, but we need to get out of here,” (Y/N) coughed, her eyes darting around the space nervously and her head tilting as if listening for something outside.

“(Y/N), you are not fine! You just got shot!”

“I know, but we need to leave right now. My car is out front, let’s go. Now.

Levi balked at her serious tone, his brow furrowing.

“(Y/N), what’re you…,”

His eyes widened even more as a gleam at her chest made him pause, his voice catching in his throat. It was a badge. A shiny gold police badge.

“(Y/N), what is this?” Levi asked, leaning down to brush the cool metal with his fingers. He noticed (Y/N) wince slightly but when he looked at her face, he saw the fire that was in her eyes, the hurt that swirled in them too. He had no right to question her right now, she had just gotten shot saving his ass after catching him working with the mafia, and here he was drilling her about a badge.

“It’s nothing,” (Y/N) snapped, making him flinch at her harsh tone. “But if we don’t move right now, things will get a lot worse. Please, drive us somewhere, anywhere, but make sure it's far away from here.”

Levi met her hard, determined gaze for a second before nodding, bending down to gently shuffle her into his arms. To his surprise, she pushed him away and stood on her own two feet, only leaning on him to use as leverage to make it to the car.

“Not my first time getting shot,” (Y/N) said in response to Levi’s questioning look.

“What!?”

“I’ll explain later,” (Y/N) mumbled, stumbling towards a glossy black car that wasn’t too different from own work car. He could tell it was meant for speed and agility with its aerodynamic form, something that surprised him since he had been expecting a bulky cop car. It was definitely not the car she normally drove, making him wonder how much of her life she had hidden from him in the way that he had from her.

Bundling her into the passenger seat, Levi tried not to panic at the sound of her pained groan as more blood gushed from her wound. He wanted to stay and bind it or stitch it, but a sharp look from (Y/N) had him hustling for the driver’s side door.

The car roared to life and Levi wasted no time in spinning the car around and speeding out onto the road, breaking several traffic laws in his haste to get back to his estate. As they sped through town, (Y/N) shouldered her jacket off and gripped the corner of it with her teeth, ripping at the fabric until she had several strips to bind her side with. Levi watched her out of the corner of his eye, making sure she didn’t faint from the blood loss as she worked. He was surprised by her skills, watching as she properly bound her wound with nothing more than a few breathless hisses and settled back into the seat, her palm pressed into her side.

Levi busied himself by calling Erwin to update him on the situation, ignoring his friend’s relieved surprise and demanding the first aid kit be delivered to his room before they arrived.

Levi nearly hit the gate in his panic, forcing himself to take a deep breath as the slow speed at which the gate opened made him want to tear his hair out. He was practically foaming at the mouth when a warm hand on his arm immediately demanded his attention, his gaze snapping to where she was watching him, her gaze unreadable. Her touch immediately calmed him, despite the turmoil in his gut at not being able to read her emotions. She always knew how to bring him back to himself, and even if she now hated him with every fiber of her being, it was still immediately effective. Something Levi was immensely grateful for as the gates finally opened wide enough to grant them entry.

His group members immediately swarmed him when the doors opened and the pair stumbled in, ready to assist, only to part like the Red Sea when they realized it was (Y/N) that was hurt rather than their leader, shock rippling through the small crowd. He barked orders and sent them running, quickly cutting past them and ignoring their questioning stares as he ushered (Y/N) up to his private quarters.

The two were both silent as Levi sat (Y/N) on his bed with a towel underneath, (her boyfriend’s clean freak tendencies making (Y/N) smile despite herself), and got to work studying her wound, the first aid kit open with a surprising amount of tools at their disposal. The room was thick with unresolved tension but neither of them seemed to be able to find the courage inside themselves to speak first, (Y/N) distracting herself by taking in the large room while Levi busied himself with cleaning her injuries.

It turned out to be Levi who spoke first, his hands running along her side in a soothing motion with every small wince she did, only for his fingers to pause when they reached the thick metal of the badge on her chest. Levi’s eyes flashed as he took it in, his fingers lifting it so he could look at it better in the light. It was a real badge alright, that was for sure, and Levi hated the fact that it sent cold shivers down his spine.

“So you’re a cop?” Levi asked softly, his voice barely over a whisper.

“A homicide detective, actually.”

Levi looked up and met (Y/N)’s hard gaze in shock. A homicide detective? How the hell could he have missed that? How did he not know about this? He thought she was the assistant manager for a firm, working with trade deals and profits. Since when did she deal with murders and killers?

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Levi asked as he went back to fixing her wound, his fingers gently prodding at the sensitive flesh around where the bullet went through.

“I didn’t tell you partly because my boss told me not to. She told me that she wanted as few people to know about this case as possible since it’s impossible to find all of the mafia members and nobody can be trusted. But it was mostly to protect you. I’ve been doing this job for a long time, and it wouldn’t be the first time if someone I was chasing down threatened the people I care about to get me off their tail. I couldn’t bear the thought of that happening to you, of you getting hurt on my behalf, so I didn’t tell you, to keep you safe.”

Levi’s breath caught in his throat at her words, his heart pounding against his ribcage. He was warmed by her words, the love and consideration she held for him, but her sentiment also fanned his anger, upset at the burden she had placed on herself.

“Idiot, you should’ve told me! You didn’t have to put all of that stress on yourself, I could’ve handled a few measly threats.”

“Oh like how you told me all about you working for the mafia? Being a mob boss?” (Y/N) said, making Levi flinch at the venom in her tone. “Do you think I liked lying to you, Levi? Do you think I enjoyed having to erase my browser history and create false reports for a fake company to keep you from finding out I was researching the recent murders that have been happening all over the city? I hated it. I fucking hated it, but I did it to keep you safe and to keep my job so I could continue to help support the two of us.”

Levi was silent, hanging his head in shame as her words washed over him. She was right. She had every right to be angry at him, but he couldn’t help but feel as if he were being stabbed with every harsh word that came out of her mouth.

“I wanted to tell you. So many times I wanted to tell you why I couldn’t come to bed with you, or why I had to skip breakfast, or why I had to lock my office door everyday for work. It killed me to lie to you because I knew I could trust you. It made me want to vomit because you had done nothing wrong and you deserved to know about what I was really doing for a living, but I held my tongue because I knew it was for the best.

And besides, my boss’s reasoning made sense. I mean, it’s obvious that the more people who know about something, the harder it is to keep it a secret. Who knows? Maybe you had friends in the mafia who could find information through you. Maybe you had a boss who was involved with the murders and would use your connection to me to keep from being behind bars. I thought it was ridiculous, but I did it because I trusted my boss too.”

(Y/N) choked out a small sob, her lip trembling as she spoke the next words. “But now I know that not only was my boss right, but if I had told you, it would have ruined our entire investigation. Why? Because you’re a fucking mafia boss, that’s why.”

“(Y/N)..., I-”

“Are you the one I’ve been hunting? The one who’s been instigating the recent murders all over the city?”

Levi froze.

“Are you the one who put bullet holes in the bodies of the people I went to see? Are you the one who created crime scenes I had to analyze? Have you been behind everything this entire time!?”

Levi couldn’t breathe. At first, discovering she was a homicide detective had made him worried for her physical health, the fact that she had been shot before making him feel light headed. But now he realized, as she asked him these questions, that he hadn’t even taken into account her mental health. It was clear she had seen a lot in her life, especially since she had told him earlier that she had been doing this job for a long time. But the images of what he often did to his victims floated through his mind. The way he was sometimes ordered to torture them in horrible ways until they finally collapsed into death from pain and exhaustion.

Horror filled him then at the thought of (Y/N) seeing that. Of seeing what he had done. Levi always knew he was a monster, a demon straight from hell, his name, The Grim Reaper, a testament to that. But he had always felt better knowing that (Y/N) would never know that side of him.

(Y/N) noted his labored breathing, his lack of response, the horror that flashed in his silver eyes even though his head was still hung, his bangs covering his face. It told her everything she needed to know. She felt her chest tighten, her heart constrict painfully as tears leaked from her eyes.

“Levi…, why? Why did you do this? I spent all of this time, trying to find this psychopath, who tortured and murdered people. To give justice to the people who could no longer obtain it themselves, only to find it’s my own boyfriend!? How could you do this? To them? To me?”

Levi shuddered with a shaky sigh as his own tears slipped down his cheeks. He finally lifted his head to meet (Y/N)’s gaze, and had to force himself to hold it when the hurt look in her eyes made him want to vomit.

“(Y/N), I’m so so sorry, I didn’t…,” Levi swallowed hard. “I didn’t want to lie to you either. I wanted to tell you, I wanted so badly to let you in on what was going on, but I couldn’t bear the thought of you getting caught up in my mess. I didn’t want anyone from my side to see me with you, to have any idea about your existence because I knew that someone would try to target you to get to me. I was so worried about you getting hurt, or worse, killed, because of me. So I didn’t tell you because no matter how much it hurt me, no matter how much I ached to tell you, I had to keep you safe. It’s my responsibility to protect you, and even if that meant lying to you about who I am, then that was what I was going to do. That’s what I did do, to keep you safe.”

(Y/N) was silent in response and while it worried Levi, he was at least grateful she wasn’t trying to kill him. She had left the gun she had used to kill Zeke back at the warehouse, but that didn’t mean she didn’t possibly have other weapons she could use against him. It wasn’t until Levi’s shaky hands managed to gain the courage to begin redressing (Y/N)’s injury that he found the strength to speak again, wanting nothing more than for this deafening silence to go away.

“Thank you, by the way…, you saved my life back there.”

“Well, I couldn’t just let him kill you, could I? No matter how angry I am at you, I will never let that happen, not if I can help it.”

“How did you find me?” Levi asked, his brow furrowing as he gently began to stitch his girlfriend up again. To his surprise, she did nothing more than squeak slightly at the sting of the needle.

“Like I said, I was investigating the recent murders, and since I was leading this case, I had free rein to do a lot of extensive research on my own without having to consult with anyone other than sending in reports for my boss. My findings led me to Zeke Yeager, and he became my number one suspect. I started following him, keeping track of his movements, noting down the addresses of places he frequented. Unfortunately, he’s a sly bastard, and covered his tracks pretty well, so I didn’t have much proof that pointed to him being connected to the murders other than he was a mobster with a vast history of violence.

Desperate for more proof, convinced that my gut feeling was right, I never stopped watching him. So when word that he was planning to execute a meeting between a long standing rival of his at an old warehouse reached me from one of my partners, I sped over there as fast as possible.”

“You didn’t know I was there?” Levi asked.

“No,” (Y/N) said. “I found you there, waiting for him to shoot you when I walked in. At first, I thought he’d found out about me tracking him, and the whole thing was just a set up to get me to show myself. I thought he’d kidnapped you to get to me, my worst fear.”

Levi finished putting in the last stitch, the bloody bullet resting on the towel beneath (Y/N), and met his girlfriend’s gaze, the tears in her eyes making his own start to water.

“But then I noticed how you were standing, and the expression on your face. You weren’t scared or confused. You were furious, but… confident. Livid, but accepting. I knew in that moment that Zeke didn’t know about me at all, but he knew you, and you knew him. It took me a little while to figure out, but when he started gloating about how he was going to be the one to bring down the famous Grim Reaper, I realized who you were. What you were.”

“(Y/N)-”

“He was going to kill you,” (Y/N) said, her hair curtaining her expression as she broke from his gaze to look down at her lap, her teardrops landing with soft taps on her crossed legs. “And you were going to let him.”

(Y/N)’s body started to shake but she fought to keep her voice firm. She had to get through this. They had to get through this… together. If she couldn’t handle this, then there was no way she would be able to be around him ever again.

“But I couldn’t let him. I saw him press that gun against your chest and I exploded. I couldn’t control myself, it was like I was possessed by a wild animal,” (Y/N) looked up at Levi again, her eyes swirling with so many emotions he couldn’t read them all.

“Levi, I’ve been doing this job for many years. I’ve seen some of the most horrific murders on the planet, met the worst scum in the world, talked with a perfectly sane man who killed his entire family one day for seemingly no reason. But never in my life have I ever felt the want…, the need to kill someone. I’ve only ever pulled out my gun three times with the intention of actually using it,” (Y/N) raised her hands to gently cup his face, her eyes locked on his.

“But in that moment, when I heard him telling you that your death would make the world a better place, when I saw him put his finger on the trigger, I had the overwhelming desire to tear him limb from limb. I acted before I could even process the situation, and I killed a man without a second thought.”

“(Y/N)...,” Levi cooed softly. “It’s not your fault. None of this is your fault. You acted without thinking because it’s in your nature to protect people. I’ve seen the way you care for others. Even when they are complete strangers, you are always thinking about how you can be there for them. What you did, protecting me, is the very essence of you, and that does not make you a monster.”

“But it is my fault, Levi,” (Y/N) said. “I killed a man. I’m a homicide detective, I’m supposed to solve murders not cause them. I’m glad I saved you, more than anything, but this is something I’m going to have to deal with and live with for the rest of my life.”

The pair were silent again, the air heavy with the weight of (Y/N)’s words.

“I was doing it for you, you know,” Levi said after another moment.

“What?”

“At the warehouse. I was there because while Zeke may not have known you were keeping an eye on him, he did know that you were connected to me. I don’t know how he found out about our relationship, but he did, and had the photos of us to prove it. He threatened you, told me that if I didn’t give myself up, that he’d do the worst of the worst to you. He threatened your friend Emily too. Erwin is a part of the Wings of Freedom with me.”

“The Wings of Freedom?” (Y/N) asked, ignoring the sinking feeling in her stomach at the thought of her best friend being hurt.

“That’s what we call ourselves. Zeke’s people are called the Beast Titans, a rival group. They’ve been a thorn in my side for years, competing with us for territory and power in the most violent ways possible. Zeke especially was always known for his complete lack of humanity, and he’d been obsessed with catching and killing me ever since we first met. When he found out about you, found out that I love you, he immediately set his sights on you and used you to corner me.”

(Y/N) sucked in a breath, somehow producing more tears to slide down her cheeks as Levi spoke.

“You’re right. When I went to that warehouse, I knew I was going to die and was prepared to do so. I didn’t want to obviously, but as long as your life was held in his hands, I knew I was going to yield to him no matter what he asked of me. I did it to protect you, to keep you alive, even if it meant never getting to see you ever again.”

Levi heard her voice catch and closed his eyes, waiting for her to react. While he wanted more than anything for her to forgive him and allow him to hold her close, he knew there was a very high possibility of her rejecting him. He had done all of it for her, but that didn’t erase his history, or his job, or the lies he spun to keep her in the dark. He knew it would kill him if she walked away from him and never looked back, but he would find a way to live with it, loving her from afar if that’s what she wanted from him. It was her choice. He would be strong for her.

What he didn’t expect was to be tackled to the floor. Levi let out a surprised grunt as he was thrown backwards, landing on his back with (Y/N) clutching him from above, sobbing into his shoulder. His arms immediately wrapped protectively around her and held her to his chest, breathing in her calming, unique scent.

“(Y/N)?”

“You idiot, you absolute fucking idiot,” (Y/N) lifted her head to look at him with puffy eyes and flushed cheeks. “Never fucking do that ever again. I know you did it to protect me, but I wouldn’t have been able to live without you, Levi. If you die, even for my sake, especially for my sake, I will kill you.”

Levi chuckled shakily and buried his face in her hair, his own tears soaking into the soft strands as he held her.

“Levi, what’re we going to do now?”

“What do you mean?”

She looked at him incredulously. “Are you serious? I love you, but I’m still a detective, and I killed a man. I can’t exactly go back without a proper explanation about what happened, and why I’ve been MIA for the past several hours. And I’d prefer it if the explanation I gave didn’t result in you getting arrested or killed.”

“I think I’d prefer that too,” Levi teased with a small smirk, earning him a slap on his chest.

“I’m serious, Levi.”

“I am too,” Levi said, sitting up so that (Y/N) was seated on his lap, his hands gripping her waist gingerly to account for her recent injury. (Y/N) watched him closely as he leaned forward and rested his forehead against hers, sighing happily against her.

“Listen, (Y/N), I know this will take a long time to get over. I know we will both struggle with this for a while and I am going to work my ass off to have you forgive me, but I want you to know that I love you and no matter what happens, we will do this together, alright?”

(Y/N)’s eyes sparkled warmly. She was still upset at him, her emotions roiling in her gut like a brewing tornado, but she managed to shove them all to the side, leaving her love clear to shine brightly for him in the wake of what just happened. There were a lot of things to figure out, and she still had no idea where they stood in terms of their relationship when they were trained to hate and hunt each other. But just as he said, they were going to get through this together.

“Okay, Levi..., I love you.”

“I love you too, (Y/N). Let’s get some sleep.”

Despite everything, the killing of a man, the discovery of her boyfriend’s secret identity, the inner turmoil inside her as the mind of a detective fought with her heart over her love for a mob boss, (Y/N) felt everything melt away the moment she was curled up with Levi in his huge bed. She nuzzled into his chest as she was lulled to sleep by the strong beat of his heart, shouting out his love for only her to hear.

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the-golden-ghost · 3 years ago

Note

Things you said prompt number 17? Feeling like reading a bit of Jigoe angst 😁

17. Things you said that I wish you hadn’t

A lot could change in two months.

Jigen had been living wild since Lupin’s last supposed death (drowning, no body discovered, all of them far too jaded with him now to believe he was truly gone). In Jigen’s case, he probably wouldn’t have believed it even with a body. He knew how conniving Lupin could be. But there’d been no word from him, nothing but rumors of his continued existence on the mortal plane, and now they’d been summoned to one of their most secluded hideouts - not by him, but by Fujiko.

Jigen damn well hoped she knew something he didn’t, because he wasn’t going to work for her. But because she really might know something - and because Jigen was a damned idiot who didn’t know what was good for him - he was here.

It was one of their nicest places, too. Small, on a lakeside, hidden behind some big grassy hills and surrounded for miles by woods. A good place to rest. When they’d been up here together last, Goemon had hung wind chimes and the four of them had planted a garden which was now, as Jigen could see, overrun with weeds, but the chimes were still singing.

He parked his car and sat for a minute. No idea who’d be inside. There were no other vehicles he could see but that didn’t mean the house was empty. He just wasn’t sure he was ready to face any of them.

Two months ago Jigen had gotten the news and buried his grief because at this point he was numb to it. Lupin liked to screw around like this - he was magnificent and selfish and saw his own life as a stageplay that the world watched with baited breath. When he died - truly died, he’d assured Jigen long ago - it would be spectacular, the kind of death that shook the world to its core and that people would immortalize in song and story for centuries upon centuries to come.

Drowning wasn’t it, so Lupin was coming back. Probably. Either way that wound had cauterized itself long ago, for Jigen. It wouldn’t do any good to grab Lupin by the throat and demand what he couldn’t give. It didn’t seem to matter that Jigen got shaken to the core every single fucking time but Jigen was just one man, and he didn’t know how to write stories. So on it went.

Goemon was different. After the news came they’d stood together with their bags packed, ready to separate for an uncertain amount of time, and Jigen, shaken, had turned to the one man he loved who he was certain was still breathing and offered himself. What did a samurai need with a partner? Apparently nothing, because Goemon had refused his service and left. And it was that simple refusal that had been grating on Jigen since they’d seen each other last, because somehow, in his infinite stupidity, he’d thought Goemon cared enough about him to want to stick together. Somehow he’d made that mistake.

But no. Jigen was a man who faltered without someone to ride beside, but Goemon worked just fine alone.

After two months living city to city in and out of dives and the seediest motels money could buy, it was strange to be in a place with wind chimes. It felt like a waking dream, like none of this was quite real, or maybe it was just the scotch messing with his head. Didn’t matter. The door was unlocked and Jigen walked in with a rush of apprehension.

Nobody. The place was clean and empty and abandoned.

“Fujiko?” he asked to no one. She’d called them, so she should be here. But apparently not. “Lupin?” he called, more hesistant now. If Lupin were to truly just show up like this, casually, as if Jigen’s life were just an intermission he could stroll into whenever he felt like it - Jigen would probably shoot him dead right there and just get the inevitable over with. But he was still gone.

“Goemon?” He wasn’t here either. That made it easier. He shuffled off to the kitchen to get himself another drink and then slumped on the couch for a nap. The drive up here had been way too long.

Jigen awoke with a start in the early evening to find that he was no longer alone, that there was a shadow hovering by the window. He scrambled up; taking in through his dazed and blurry vision who it was. “Goemon?” he asked.

“It’s me.”

In spite of the rage and bitterness that he’d been clinging to for the past two months in a desperate bid to keep from collapsing, Jigen’s heart still pulled towards Goemon. Soft as he was, he would have forgiven Goemon for that abandonment. He would have forgiven him for anything.

Anything except for what he did a moment later, which was to recoil when Jigen approached him. “Jigen? Where have you been living?”

“Around,” Jigen said, taken aback by the reaction, his anger slowly rising. Damn him, he didn’t even want to go through a proper greeting? Even now? “Why? Do you care?”

Goemon studied Jigen for a long moment before looking away. “You look terrible. I would not doubt you haven’t even been trying to take care of yourself. Why didn’t stay in one of the safe houses? Lupin would not have denied you that.”

In truth, Jigen hadn’t stayed because it would have been hell on earth. Living day to day, alone in one of those empty half-homes with way too many memories per square inch but no people in sight. He couldn’t take it. Jigen needed cites; that impersonal human contact where no one knew you from Adam and didn’t give a shit in hell about you but where you were never isolated, never cut off from the world. There was security in living like a rat in a wall.

He didn’t say any of that to Goemon, though. Instead he decided to opt for something much nastier. “Maybe I just like living in filth. Guess we can’t all be as honorable and perfect as you, can we? Where were you? Wait - I can guess - training yourself up so you can get a better gig and stop associating with mangy dogs like me.”

Goemon’s gaze flickered angrily but he kept calm. “I have been training,” he said coolly. “And you are drunk by the sound of it. Not that I’m surprised.”

Jigen’s rage flared up again, in full force. “What the hell’s that supposed to mean? You’re not surprised? What, you want to fight me? I’ll show you how fucking drunk I am.”

Goemon didn’t move, nor did he make a motion to draw his sword. “I did not come here to fight anyone, least of all you. I came here because Fujiko sent for me.”

“Yeah? Well fuck Fujiko. Fuck her and fuck you. I’m out.”

He made it twenty miles back towards where he’d come from before he realized he hadn’t put gas in the car, ran out, toyed briefly with sleeping in the ditch on the side of the road, thought better of it, and began the long hike back to the house. He made it in by 1 am and collapsed onto the couch, too exhausted for words.

In the morning Jigen wasn’t mad anymore. Mostly because he felt like he’d been run over by a truck. Just didn’t have the energy, but more than that, he felt guilty about taking his losses out on Goemon. It wasn’t Goemon’s fault Jigen couldn’t survive two measly months flying solo without having a complete breakdown. Goemon had tucked himself away in the bedroom and wasn’t coming out. Fujiko was nowhere to be seen, still, and Lupin... who knew.

Jigen sat around for a while and smoked and wished he hadn’t come. But he had come, and he’d screwed things up, so. Over to the bedroom door he went, and knocked.

“Hey,” he asked hoarsely, opening the door a little. “You still mad?”

There was no reply, which meant the answer was probably yes.

“Cause... look, man, I’m sorry. I’m sorry about every stupid half-assed thing I said to you last night. And I didn’t mean a word of it. I just wanted to fight somebody and you were the only one here.”

Still silence.

“But that doesn’t make it right.”

No response.

“I’m comin’ in,” Jigen said finally. He wasn’t immediately sliced in half, so that was a good sign at least. Goemon was sitting on the bed, facing away from the door, deathly still and silent. “Goemon? Please look at me.”

Goemon did not. For all that, Jigen might have been invisible.

He took a step closer. “Look, I don’t care what you say to me,” he said between shaking breaths. “I don’t friggin’ care, Goemon. You can cuss me out if you want. You can say whatever you want to me - you can call me the lowest, dirtiest, most pathetic damn bastard you’ve ever met in your entire life. I don’t give a shit, I know what I am, I just - “ he broke off, pleading. “Just hold me, Goemon, for fuck’s sake I just need you right now, and -”

The words struck home. Goemon turned, looking startled, and reached out to Jigen. For a long while they clung to each other, squeezing tight, Jigen burying his face against Goemon’s neck, twining his fingers through his hair, and Goemon gripping Jigen around the waist and running a hand down his back, over and over.

“Did I hurt you? Bad?” Jigen asked finally, settling down on the bed next to Goemon, who, by some miracle, didn’t pull away, even when Jigen leaned against his shoulder.

“Nothing that I cannot survive. I’ve been training, remember,” Goemon said softly. “And you’re sure you’re all right? You don’t look well.”

“I feel like shit, but it’s just part of the territory. I’ll get better,” Jigen said.

“Good. I was worried about you, you know. While I was alone I was able to improve myself - I hope to be strong enough now to keep you and Fujiko safe at all costs. But I knew that the price was that I had to leave you alone for that time.”

“Well, I’ve been alone before,” Jigen said nonchalantly. “It’s okay. I’m used to it. It was kind of fun not having to do the dishes or listen to Lupin’s chatter.”

“I miss Lupin’s chatter,” Goemon replied.

“Yeah,” Jigen said sadly. “I do too.” They sat for a moment, united in loss. “Hey, Goemon?” Jigen asked after a minute. “Can we forget about yesterday? I’d rather just start over.”

Goemon sighed. “Yes, I think that would be best.”

The rest could come later. Fujiko’s plan, Lupin’s revival. For now, the two of them simply rested, side by side, for the remainder of the morning. They had a lot of catching up to do.

#Lupin III #my writing #me: this'll be short #it: isn't #anyway sometimes I think about how Lupin's penchant for treating his own life like a Grand Performance #leads to him inadvertently using his friends as unwilling extras and how that's going to affect them #I touched on that here but that's also not really what this is about I just think it's fucked up but in an Intriguing way #anyway I hope this passes inspection! you said you wanted angst so I went for it #Jigen and Goemon sometimes badly miscommunicate. they're rather guarded emotionally (but who's NOT on this damn show)#but they're also pretty willing to forgive and understand each other #so I gave them a softer ending

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jessicajonesrp · 4 years ago

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He’s backkkk

It took some careful planning, but eventually, Rikarah had what she needed to be able to bring Kilgrave back to life.

She already had a safe and secure location where she would be uninterrupted during times of needed concentration- her open rented home, just outside of Manhattan. She had never bothered to inform Phillip that she had a rental house; it seemed a better bet to keep the information of her multiple living quarters, unused for most of the year, to herself, just in case. Phillip had been far from discreet, and there was a reason Rikarah had chosen a secondary lodging outside of the business of cities such as NYC, Hell’s Kitchen, Harlem, or Manhattan itself. She was a loner at heart, but her interest and her focus tended to be on others, and it was necessary to spend most of her time among them in order to know them and their lives. This distant secondary home was to be used only when necessary, to recharge, or for specific situations such as this.

It hadn’t been difficult to obtain a picture of Kilgrave. After the incident on the dock, he and Jessica and Patricia Walker had been all over the covers of newspapers everywhere, so it was a simple matter of a few clicks on a smart phone to find and save a picture of the man in question. It had taken more time to obtain something with Kilgrave’s DNA. Rikarah had attempted to trace the location of his body- somehow she suspected he had been neither traditionally buried nor cremated, and it was her guess that he was likely being used for scientific experimentation or study, legally or otherwise, within the government or whoever else had been the highest bidder of access.

With some creative thought, she had been able to trace back several of Kilgrave’s last known addresses, including the childhood home of Jessica Jones, which was unfortunately no longer standing after its bombing. Nevertheless, Rikarah had discovered that the “Kilgrave survivors” group Jessica had formed over a year ago, with the intention of drawing out Kilgrave and gaining information on him, was still active and meeting regularly.

It hadn’t been difficult to insinuate herself into the group for a few weeks as a new member, pretending to be one of the traumatized survivors of the incident of Kilgrave-directed violence on the dock the evening he himself had died. Rikarah had enough research information to be able to nod along and briefly and tearfully provide her own version of events. Meanwhile she took note of the people who had spent prolonged time with Kilgrave- being his driver for a week, forced to let him live in their home for longer, or forced to wait on him as a cook, bartender, or masseuse.

Those were the ones that may possess something that would carry Kilgrave’s DNA, even now. Those were the ones that she made the effort to befriend, to offer a shoulder and a listening ear. And a few episodes of feigned attraction and friendship had been enough for one clearly still traumatized older man to allow her into his home and his bed, and with minimal encouragement from Rikarah, to lead her in a tour of the house Kilgrave had made his lodging for a time- the house the man still lived in.

“It was terrible,” the man told her, actually tearful as he shook his head, eyes cloudy as though reliving what he spoke of. “I couldn’t leave the house, I couldn’t speak or even move without him giving me the okay to. He used my house as though it were his, and then one day he just left and didn’t come back. I was terrified that he might return, any moment, and I couldn’t predict when or do anything to stop him. He didn’t even take all of his things with him, and I was afraid to do anything to get rid of them, or even move them, in case it made him angry if he did come back. I know he’s dead now, but even now I’m afraid to touch his things. That’s pathetic, I know, but it’s the truth.”

It was pathetic, in Rikarah’s view, but it was also fortunate for her. Because among Kilgrave’s “left behind things” were a comb, toothbrush, and some clothing including socks and underwear. All certain to contain Kilgrave’s DNA.

She had charmed the man with sympathetic words and touches, assuring him of his bravery, lying without a flicker of remorse about her own supposed fear. It hadn’t taken more than twenty minutes for him to be convinced that he was now strong and brave enough to let some of those items go, “just a few to start with, the ones most associated with him personally”- and that she, Rikarah, in spite of her own fear, cared enough about his healing to be the one to take them away to make sure they were disposed of.

She still couldn’t believe the man was gullible enough to fall for such nonsense. But he had actually leaked tears and hugged her, thanking her for her empathy and giving him the chance to start a new life.

Ironic, and amusing, really, that in all actuality, she was bringing back what he feared the very most, all in the name of helping him put it behind him.

So armed in her remote rented home with the personal objects of Kilgrave’s and a clear picture of his face, Rikarah sat cross legged on her bed and emptied her mind of all thoughts but those of her intention. She stared at Kilgrave’s picture, her hands stroking over each object containing his DNA, and pictured him awake, alive, and whole before her. She imagined the beating of his heart, the rhythm of his breathing, every synapse and nerve once more sharp with activity and use. She envisioned the blood running through his veins, and as her own small body grew taut and gave off fevered heat with the effort of her actions, she reached out for the knife beside her knee. Grasping it in her left hand, she slashed a shallow x over each of her palms, and then at the surface of each of her feet. Hands shaking slightly, she smeared the blood over the comb, the toothbrush, and the clothing, combining their DNA.

With a final shudder of effortful focus, Rikarah spoke aloud Kilgrave’s name. She could feel the air grow thick and strained, as though holding something moving and living and shifting in shape, and she slumped back, exhausted, against the bed, watching with satisfaction as a human form began to slowly knit itself into view in front of her.

It wasn’t a pretty sight. The revived bodies started first with skeletons, then filled up with internal organs and muscles and sinew, before finally being knit over with skin and hair and the other details normally seen on the outside. It was no different with Kilgrave, and eventually, there he stood, naked, panting, and wide-eyed at her bedside.

Rikarah smiled, more in self-satisfaction at the accomplished task than at the sight of the man’s naked body. She didn’t consider him overly impressive in his physique, but he would do. It was the man and his mind, not his body, that mattered. She more than anyone knew it was a mistake to overlook people for their physicality.

“Where the bloody hell am I?” Kilgrave sputtered, disoriented, seeming to struggle to draw in breaths. His lungs, being new again, were likely still adjusting to breathing. “What’s the matter with me? And who the fuck are you?”

When Rikarah didn’t immediately answer, too tired to bother, Kilgrave straightened, pointing a finger at her, and took a menacing step forward, raising his voice. “I asked you a question, are you deaf? Answer me!”

“I’m sorry, Kevin, but I don’t take orders from anyone if it doesn’t suit me, and certainly not from you,” Rikarah said coolly, lifting an eyebrow from her supine position on the bed. “As you quite literally owe your life to me, I would expect a little more respect and gratitude, but I’m a patient woman. I’ll assume you’re rather in shock at the moment, given you’ve just gone from bones and brain mush to a living body again, and let the rudeness slide.”

Kilgrave’s eyes bulged, and he recoiled, alarmed as much by the nonchalant response he had just received as the strange situation he had found himself in. To speak an order and have it not obeyed immediately was beyond his comprehension.

“But I told you to do it!” he almost whined, staring down at the small and clearly unintimidated woman resting on her side in the bed. “I told you to, and you just- the only person who could ignore me was Jessica, and-“

He stiffened, his face paling, as he pointed an accusing finger at Rikarah again.

“Jessica did this, Jessica used that sedative thing on me, didn’t she?! You’re with her, you’re one of her people!”

“Certainly not,” Rikarah corrected him, exhaling with a weary and somewhat impatient sigh. “Jessica knows nothing of this- yet. As far as she believes, you are long dead, and she is glad of it. After all, she was the cause.”

She sat up, watching wryly as the realization and the memory of his own last few moments of life, just before Jessica snapped his neck, came back into the forefront of his thoughts. Rikarah gave him a few more moments to process this against the obvious reality of his current status of being alive before addressing him again.

“Yes, Kevin, you were dead, and for over a year now, too. You would have stayed that way, if not for myself and my own unique abilities. Some gratitude and a certain level of loyalty is not unwarranted.”

“I was dead,” Kilgrave repeated, the words stunned, almost disbelieving. “And you’re saying- what, that you resurrected me? You?” He snorted, looking Rikarah up and down dismissively. “No offense, love, but you hardly look the type to have that sort of power.”

“And Jessica does?” Rikarah countered. “I’ll grant you that she has the advantage in height, but she’s of a smaller frame even than myself, and what she may have over me in physical strength, I can outdo in the sheer enormity of my ability. She may be able to kill someone with a punch, but I’m the one who can bring them back from the dead. If you ask me, I have the greater power, and therefore, the greater true strength.”

Kilgrave looked her over again, more carefully this time, assessing rather than dismissing her. He took a step closer, still seeming not to care for his nakedness as he narrowed his eyes at Rikarah, anger losing out to eagerness in his eyes.

“You know Jessica,” he asserted. “Where is she?”

Rikarah wagged a finger at him playfully, a small smile curving her lips.

“Am I really so uninteresting, that I bring you out of death, and you would forgo all details to chase after another woman? Perhaps I was wrong in my interest in you. Perhaps someone else is more deserving, and you can simply go back to where you were before.”

“Wait, no, that isn’t it, love,” Kilgrave backpedaled, his smile at Rikarah forced at first as he raked a hand through his hair, then more genuine. “Of course I want to know how you managed this, and of course I’m glad for it. And I certainly want to know how it is you don’t listen to a thing I tell you to do,” he muttered, more to himself than to Rikarah, before addressing her again. “But if you know Jessica, then you must know something of our history, and why I would want to know where she is. She’s the one who killed me, you know. She’s the one-“

“That,” Rikarah interrupted, to Kilgrave’s barely contained outrage, “is in the past. The present is right here, with me, in this moment. Choose wisely, Kevin Kilgrave, and choose now, while you still have the choice before you. You can realize that I am no ordinary woman you’re dealing with here, that you owe me your life and your loyalty, and I owe you nothing and cannot be ordered into anything you may want from me. Believe me, I hold no liking for Jessica Jones, and as long as I am the woman who comes first and foremost in your world, I care little for how you choose to play with her. And I am certainly not opposed to letting you know every detail of what you have missed knowing of her life over the past year that you’ve been dust and bones.”

She paused, tilting her head, and gave him a moment to consider, before concluding, “Or you can choose to be foolish, ungrateful, and quite frankly, a bumbling, pathetic corpse, stumbling off on your own in a world that has moved on without you. You would have none of my help or my connections, none of my knowledge, and you would displease me greatly. When and if Jessica Jones kills you again- and she would, you know, if you just pop up on her in her new life without my assistance- then you can be certain I would not lift a finger to bring you back. So, then. What shall it be? I would think the decision obvious, but perhaps you’re not as intelligent as I believed.”

For a moment Kilgrave stood there, motionless, perhaps still in shock, or perhaps genuinely weighing out his obsession with Jessica and his desire for revenge against the logical reasoning of Rikarah’s words. But then he nodded slowly, reaching forward to take hold of Rikarah’s hand in his.

“Well, it would indeed be a fool’s errand to let a woman like you slip out of my grasp. Why don’t we start over with introductions, and perhaps something in the way of an explanation.”

And as Rikarah began to speak, giving Kilgrave some if not all of the answers he craved, she noticed his body relax further, his expression growing more and more fascinated as he came to understand more of the extent of her actions and her power. It wasn’t quite the way, she was sure, that he had looked at Jessica, but for now, it was enough.

It was enough, in fact, that after he had dressed in some of his old clothing and taken time to familiarize himself with Rikarah and her home, that Rikarah was willing to give him the phone number, if not the address, of Jessica’s new workplace, Heroes for Hire. And she sat back, interested and indulgent, as he placed a call, from a cheap prepaid phone she had bought in anticipation of his need for one.

It was Trish who answered, her voice bright and cheerful as the company’s head. “Heroes for Hire, we provide help, heroism, and honorable services for those in need in a time where true heroism is more needed than ever. How can we help you today?”

“Ah, Patsy,” Kilgrave purred, snickering to himself when he heard Trish suck in a sharp breath, immediately recognizing his British accent and self-satisfied tone. “So good to hear a familiar voice, but unfortunately, yours has never been the one I wanted to hear, and you prattle on enough as it is on that bloody talk show of yours. Give the phone to Jessica. Tell her she has a message from an old friend, would you?”

“This isn’t funny,” Trish said tightly, her voice controlled but barely keeping back anger. “Whoever you are, pretending to be that man is not a joke, it’s cruel, and-“

“Ah, but this is no joke, Patsy, can’t you recognize your own would be lover?” Kilgrave asked rhetorically. “Have you had so many men now you can’t remember the voice of all the ones whose throat you stuck your tongue inside of? Let me help you out, then. I’m the one who told you to put a bullet in your head. Fortunately enough for you, that doesn’t appear to have worked out, I never did find out why. Care to explain it to me, Patsy?”

He and Rikarah both heard Trish suck in her breath on the other side of the line. He doubted that this incident in the bunker was something anyone but she, Kilgrave, Simpson, and Jessica were aware of- and out of the four of them, both men were dead. Or supposed to be.

“Who are you?” she asked, her voice softer than before. “What do you want?”

“Unfortunately, Patsy, for me to really make you do what I’d like to make you do, you’d have to be a good bit closer to me than a phone call, something about pheromones,” Kilgrave said casually. “But I do have other ways of making you do as I’d like you to. Put Jessica on the phone, or I will have six people show up at her doorstep and cut your name into their own foreheads. If she tries to stop them, they will cut her as well. Is that something you want to have on your conscience, Patsy? For a simple conversation?”

The line went silent for a few moments. When Jessica came onto the line, her voice was hard and cold as steel.

“Who the fuck are you, and just what the fuck do you think you’re doing, playing this kind of sick joke?”

“And hello to you too, Jessie,” Kilgrave exclaimed, putting an exaggerated bounce to his voice. “No joke, you never did have much of a sense of humor to waste any on. I won’t say it’s good to hear from you, since I had to get murdered, raised from the dead, and then still call your sister first and threaten her for you to speak to me, and I must say that hurts a man’s feelings.”

“You’re not him. You can’t be, you’re just some sick asshole who needs to fucking go put his dick in a-“

“Oh, Jessie, I can see your language is as filthy as ever, every bit as appalling as your fashion sense. Let’s cut off all the protests of my supposed death and just check your office email, shall we?”

Five minutes before the phone call, Rikarah had shot a quick video of him smiling and waving into the camera, with the date and time of the video clearly time stamped at its bottom. With a few clicks, he sent the video to the public Heroes for Hire email address, cutting off the call.

“But don’t worry, sweetheart, you’ll hear from me again soon. If you miss me before we meet again, you have the video for comfort’s sake.”

As Kilgrave hung up, glowing with renewed feelings of power over the fear, rage, and helplessness he had stirred anew in the two women he had just spoken to, he sent a genuine smile in Rikarah’s direction, who returned it in kind.

“You know what, I like you, Rikarah Pallaton. I think we’ll get along just fine after all.”

#jessica jones roleplay #Jessica Jones #luke cage roleplay #Luke Cage #trish walker #trish walker roleplay #kilgrave #kilgrave roleplay

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pointlesstrashyexistence · 4 years ago

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Every few days I think about how if Supernatural’s writers were just planning on killing of Cas and then never mentioning him again with the original ending involving the possibility of just a brief cameo of him in Heaven weirdly partying with (dead?) Kansas, I probably would’ve preferred it if Cas didn’t have a confession scene.

Ok here me out. Yes I ship DeanCas/Destiel. Yes I loved that there was at least acknowledgment of Cas’ romantic feelings towards Dean. Misha has outright said the confession was romantic and there have already been two official dubs in two different languages where the “I love you” specifically uses phrases that show romantic love. It’s not up for debate anymore if those feelings were romantic.

But if they were just going to throw that in there and get rid of Cas and never mention him again except for two scenes where he doesn’t appear and one that is just Lucifer pretending to be him to gain access to the bunker, I would’ve preferred it if Cas’ true happiness was something that I think would’ve been the ultimate acknowledgement of Cas’ transformation, which I feel would’ve been Jack calling Cas his dad and telling his dad how much he loves him. Of all three members of Team Free Will 1.0, Cas has been the most like a dad to Jack. Cas was the one who eventually helped Kelly hide, prepared a home for Jack and Kelly to live in, for Jack to be raised in safe and loved and cared for. Cas was the one prepared to go down fighting to protect Jack before Jack was even born. Cas is the one who always runs to Jack, to protect Jack, to save Jack, even if it means creating a rift between him, Sam, and Dean.

I love my Sam Winchester is Jack Kline’s Father fics, and my Dean Winchester is Jack Kline’s Father fics, and my Team Free Will 1.0 are Jack Kline’s Fathers fic on ao3 . I do. But if we’re talking about in the show, Cas is the one who is the most like a father to Jack.

Love Dean and wish that man had been given therapy and anger management and AA meetings and working to become a better, less violent person who takes accountability for what he’s done as his finale ending rather than just dying by a fucking nail through the chest, something Cordelia on Buffy The Vampire Slayer survives after like a twenty foot drop from a staircase. But Dean outright hates Jack during his widower arc and makes it known how much of a monster he thinks Jack is to the point where Jack repeatedly tries to commit suicide and then it’s just never really brought up again after Cas comes back and Dean then just goes back and forth on whether he thinks Jack is part of his family or not for the last three seasons. As much as I like the few scenes where Dean is actually bonding with Jack and calls him “their kid” and Jack referring to himself as a Winchester, Dean isn’t really Jack’s dad in the show. Do I think this probably would’ve been a different story if we got baby Jack? Yes, but that’s not what I’m talking about right now

Sam? Sam definitely tries at first. Sam gets what it’s like to feel like a monster and be viewed as one even when your not, and calls out Dean for how he acts and behaves towards Jack. But Dean just as easily calls out Sam for using Jack to try and get their mother back and trying to appear invested in Jack to get what he wants. Sam’s affection for Jack is conditional at first. He gradually grows to be more paternal to Jack but by season 14, it kind of just dwindles away. We got all this buildup of Sam and Jack’s relationship, which yes there should’ve been because here you have someone who was supposed to be the True Vessel of Lucifer, the Boy King of Hell and the Antichrist, the Son of Lucifer, and there’s not really any care given to it afterwards. That season was probably the last time the writers actually did anything interesting with Sam and tried to give him an arc in my opinion.

Cas though? Cas, who was a warrior of God that led garrisons and killed the offspring nephilim of lesser angels? Cas who grows a respect and admiration for humanity, seeing them as complex miraculous beings rather than hairless apes like the majority of the angels? Cas who defends humanity’s existence against other angels even at the cost of his life? Cas who originally thought of the Antichrist as a monster that needed to be killed to protect humanity but heard Kelly talk about how good she believed her child could be despite being the son of the devil and saw a paradise on earth when he actually communicated with Jack in the womb? Cas who separated from the only other two people he has consistently turned to for help and has provided help for in order to try and ensure Jack would be a child safe and loved even if it meant being away from the people he considered family and could die protecting Jack and Kelly? Cas who unconditionally loves and treats Jack as his child throughout the last three season? He is definitely Jack’s father.

I just think there’s something very fitting about the angel who unconditionally loved humanity despite never being able to entirely follow god’s orders raising the supposed antichrist who becomes a god that respects humanity’s free will. And I think that scene would’ve been fantastic in that Cas loves Jack as his child so much that he makes that deal with the Empty in the first place to protect Jack , but Cas loves Jack so much that Jack is the reason the deal is broken. Jack doesn’t realize Cas thinks of him as his child the same way Cas doesn’t think Jack sees him as his dad, and that recognition that they feel the same way is the most bittersweet moment in the world because their first moment where they mutually knowingly recognize each other as parent and child seems like it might be the last one they have together as they hug. Jack sobs while furiously apologizing as he sees black goo come to reach Cas who only has a few more second left to kiss the top of his child’s head and hug him close and say something like “I love you so much my son” before pushing him away while Jack watches, crying as he calls out “Dad don’t leave me” as his father get covered in black goo while smiling with tears streaming down his face before disappearing.

I’m not sure how that situation could’ve occurred. Maybe Jack and Cas are together when people start disappearing, and Jack worries about how if Chuck doesn’t consider him important enough to torment he could also be proofed away, and he wants to tell his dad how much he loves him in that way kids do when they think they might see their parents for the last time and despite being in basically an adult body Jack is still three and not really thinking about what could happen or doesn’t even think this could be Cas’ happiest moment because he always thought Cas knew Jack thought of him as his dad. I don’t know.

But that scene happens and the Empty collects Cas and then when Jack becomes god and brings everyone back, he somehow also brings Cas back from the empty. Look the writers gave absolutely no good reason for why Lucifer somehow came back from the empty in 15x19 when the Empty specifically states that Chuck has no power in her domain so why should I? But I guess if I was going to it would’ve involved Jack finding out how it got loud in the empty and bargaining with the Empty in trading demons, angels, and other nephilim in exchange for making the empty quiet again and managing to deal with what to do with all of these now revived supernatural creatures. Still frustrated that the show made God the enemy and turned Billie into a last minute villain when the Empty was right the, the Enpty was hyped up, and then it just took Cas and Billie and disappeared, and was never heard from again.

Anyways, Jack and Amara separate but they’re still functioning as a unit and are working together to fix the other universes as well as heaven and the systems of who gets sent to heaven, hell, and purgatory in a sort of season 4 of the Good Place style, and Cas takes on a major role as the celestial being with the most interaction with and understanding of humanity, especially with that time he was a homeless human under his belt to provide his own reflection on why certain people may do things that are wrong like stealing in order to provide just a basic need for themselves like stealing food to eat. It’s implied that Rowena’s involved in this too. Cas and Jack say their goodbyes to Sam and Dean. If I had it my way, the finale would end up being like the one I made up in an earlier post where Sam and Dean get their beach day but realize that their relationship isn’t healthy for either of them and separate and the viewer no longer has access to what they do with their lives afterwards because Sam and Dean now have control of their own stories and decide who gets to see it. But I guess what I made up fixes some general overarching complaints about the last three episodes. I still hate that last episode and what I feel is the assassination of 15 years of character development of Sam and Dean in order to go back to S1 with Sam as the main character and Dean as the side character interrupting his life but I just barely acknowledge it as the show’s finale.

I do love the confession scene. I really do. But if it was just going to end with Cas dying a minute after confessing his love and never being seen or acknowledged again, I would’ve much rather preferred it being that his happiest moment was being with his child in the endless feedback loop of familial love.

#Supernatural #SPN #spn #supernatural #Jack Kline #jack kline #Castiel #castiel #cas thee el #Cas Thee El #spn 15x18 #spn 15x19 #Castiel is Jack Kline’s Father #castiel is jack kline’s father #Castiel is Jack’s Father #castiel is jack’s father #cas is jack’s father #Cas is Jack’s Father

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not-oscar-wilde · 4 years ago

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Revived

The apocalypse has been averted, the timeline fixed, and the Hargreeves siblings returned to 2019. Herb decides to do them one more favour and save the life of one Dave Katz.

I wrote a new fic! read it below the cut or on AO3.

The pain in Dave’s chest was unbearable. Klaus was above him and he was speaking, but he couldn’t make out what he was saying. He wanted to comfort him, to stop him from panicking and tell him he loved him, but he couldn’t get the words out. He could only try and keep his eyes open, to keep his eyes on Klaus and try to psychically tell him everything he needed him to know, before the pain won out and everything turned black.

And then he woke up.

Though the room around him smelled sterile, it wasn’t like any hospital or medical tent he had ever been in before. He was lying in a crisp, white bed, with a myriad of wires attached to his body. Some of them he recognised, the IV drips were standard, but the majority were completely alien to him, from those puncturing his skin to those seemingly just stuck to it.

“Good afternoon, Mr Katz,” a smooth, female voice said in an accent that reminded him vaguely of movie stars. But when Dave looked around the room, he was completely alone, accompanied only by strangely flat screens he couldn’t see properly from his position on the bed. “Please remain calm. I have notified our Medical Team that you are awake and someone will be with you shortly.” There was something wrong about that voice, some kind indescribable, minute wrongness that unsettled him.

“Where am I?” he asked.

“You are in the Intensive Care Unit of the Temps Commission Infirmary, Room 9,” the voice said.

The Temps Commission Infirmary? He’d never heard of that hospital, and it definitely didn’t look American or Vietnamese. “The what? What happened? And who are you?”

“The Temps Commission Infirmary, attached to the headquarters of the Temps Commission. You were shot through the chest in A Shau Valley, Vietnam, February 21, 1968. I am VINA, your Virtual Infirmary Nursing Assistant.”

He’d been shot. He remembered it, remembered the pain, remembered the way Klaus had screamed and held him and how he hadn’t managed to say anything before the world had gone dark. What had happened to Klaus? To everyone? “How long have I been here?”

“You have been in the TCICU for three days, six hours, and thirty seven minutes.”

But when he brought his hand up to his chest, there were no dressings, just bare, unmarked skin. If he had been there for six days, if he’d been shot… He should be dead, or at the very least, heavily bandaged. Before he could think too much about that, a door slid open like something out of a sci-fi movie, and a tall, dark skinned woman with a serious face walked in. “Good afternoon, Mr Katz. My name is Doctor Onyeka Nwoye. How are you feeling?” she asked as she approached his bed, examining the screens. If there hadn’t been much stranger things going on, he would have been mildly surprised by a black lady doctor being sent in to treat him. He forgot, sometimes, that not everywhere was like Texas. But he was immensely glad of that fact, particularly if she’d been the one to fix him up.

“I’m good,” he said, and as confusing as it was, that was true. He shouldn’t be feeling good. He’d been shot, and he felt fine. That shouldn’t be happening.

“Any pain?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Good, that’s good. VINA, anything to report?”

“Mr Katz has not experienced any physical complications during the healing process. His body has responded well to the treatment and brain scans indicate that no neurological damage has occurred,” the disembodied voice said. The voice that didn’t belong to a person at all, if Dave had understood correctly. VINA had to be some kind of automaton, a computer that could speak. He didn’t much like that.

Doctor Nwoye nodded, a faint smile tugging at her lips. “A complete success, then. I would like to keep you under supervision for another twenty-four hours, but if I have no concerns at the end of this period, I see no need to keep you here any longer.” With that, she set about detaching the various wires from his body.

“Where is here? I know we’re in some kinda hospital, the… Commission?”

“Yes. We are an organisation dedicated to fixing, monitoring, and eliminating timeline anomalies,” she said, as if that made any kind of sense. “And, in exceptional circumstances, minimising potential disruptions.”

Dave frowned, trying to translate her words into something close to regular English. He knew he wasn’t that stupid, but he sure felt it. “So I’m a- what was it? A timeline anomaly?”

“I am a doctor, not an analyst. I cannot tell you who or what the timeline anomalies are.”

“Were you there, when I got shot?” he asked instead.

Dr Nwoye laughed and shook her head. “Oh Lord, no. I do not have the disposition for time travel, and I think my wife would have my head if I were ever to set foot in the field. I work solely from inside the TCI.”

“Your wife ?” he repeated, his heart leaping. This was a woman with a wife. A woman in a world where she could not only love another woman, but marry her and be able to mention it so casually to a complete stranger?

“Do you have a problem with the fact your life was saved by a lesbian, Mr Katz?” she asked calmly, and his stomach sank.

“No, ma’am! I just… Where I come from, people can’t… I didn’t know there was anywhere you could have that kinda marriage.” Was this the future? The place that Klaus had talked about, had said he couldn’t ever go back to? Had Dave somehow ended up there in his place, leaving Klaus in the middle of a war he’d never even signed up for? But that world was ending. Klaus had told him that. So how was he here? “I was just surprised is all. I’m… you know, the same typa way.”

The slight smile returned to the doctor’s face, and Dave relaxed. “It was 1968 you came from, yes?” So that pretty much confirmed his ‘future’ theory. Dave nodded mutely. “I cannot say I know why your survival matters so much yet your injury could not have been prevented, negating the need to bring you here at all, but I will say I am glad you are more… progressive than some of your contemporaries. It does make my job easier.”

“Doctor Nwoye, you are needed urgently in Room 14,” the disembodied voice said before Dave could formulate an answer, and the doctor sighed.

“I am on my way. Mr Katz, if you need anything, just ask VINA.” And with that, the bizarre door slid open again and Dr Nwoye was striding away.

The room was silent for a few minutes as Dave thought about this whole situation. He’d think it a fever dream, but he wasn’t sure he was creative enough to come up with all of this. “VINA?” he said eventually, feeling more than a little silly speaking to an empty room.

But the disembodied voice responded immediately. “Do you require assistance, Mr Katz?”

“I…What the hell is going on?”

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean. Please elaborate or rephrase to receive appropriate support.”

“I got shot . But I don’t even have a scar.”

“You are correct. Do you have any questions about your treatment?”

Dave exhaled shakily and touched his chest again. Even that should have hurt, and though he was incredibly grateful that it didn’t, that fact was in itself unsettling. “What kinda doctor can just make a bullet wound… vanish?”

“Dr Nwoye is an expert in bioregeneration and biotemporal manipulation.”

“Bio… Jeez.” He could guess at what those words meant, but truthfully, he had no idea. It may as well have been another language. Was this the world Klaus had come from? This strange world filled with people and words he didn’t know, where gunshots through the chest were not just survivable but left no mark, where unseen people watched and spoke with you, where a black woman with a wife could be a white man’s doctor. It wasn’t a bad world. It was simply so far from the one he knew.

Some things would always be the same, though: hospitals were boring. Dave was half out of his mind with it, staring up at the ceiling and wishing he had something to do. Talking to VINA was just a little too weird, with her uncannily smooth voice and questionable existence. So he got out of bed, deciding to explore. There were no windows, only artificial lights built into the ceiling. He couldn’t even tell what time of day it was. The room was neither warm nor cold, despite the fact he was wearing only white cotton shorts.

The door that the doctor had come in through didn’t have a handle. Instead, he found a panel of buttons on the wall beside it and pushed one hopefully. With a hydraulic hiss, the door opened and he stepped out into the hallway. “Please remain in your room. If you require assistance, this can be provided. If you are searching for the bathroom, this can be located through the other door within your room.”

It was strange, being scolded by someone - or something - he couldn’t see, and in such a calm manner. But Dave obeyed and stepped back inside the confines of his room. He may as well check out the bathroom if he wasn’t allowed anywhere else.

There were clothes folded up on top of a cabinet next to the shower, accompanied by a ziplock bag of toiletries and a towel. He figured those must be for him. He was about to strip off, out of the plain white shorts he’d been left in, when a wave of self-consciousness overtook him. “VINA?” he said hesitantly.

“Do you need assistance, Mr Katz?”

“I, uh… Are you watching me in here?”

“I am tasked with monitoring all rooms of the Temps Commission Infirmary.”

He’d spent enough time in the military to be comfortable enough getting undressed in front of other men. But in front of a woman? Even if she might be a machine and not a real woman, it still felt wrong, somehow. “Could I get a little privacy?”

“To ensure your safety and the safety of other patients, I am required to observe at all times. Surveillance footage is wiped from my systems after two weeks and is not accessible without appropriate justification from Temps Commission staff.”

That still wasn’t exactly reassuring. Dave couldn’t even see where VINA was watching from, couldn’t work out where to position himself to turn his back. He’d been changed out of his fatigues, so someone had surely seen his naked body here before and there was no guarantee that they were all male, but the irrationality of his desire for modesty didn’t change anything.

She’s seen it all before , he told himself. There must’ve been hundreds of naked people in this hospital. And maybe this is just how things are in the future .

His shoulders dropped under the warmth and the strength of the water. It had been so long since he’d had a really good shower. He wasn’t sure he’d ever had one so good. Perhaps Klaus had had a point, waxing lyrical about the joys of a hot bath.

But then he touched his chest, touched the unblemished skin, and the touch stole the air from his lungs. He could feel it, feel himself being torn apart by the most agonising pain he had ever felt. What was the difference between warm water and hot blood? It all felt the same, running down his skin. Hands shaking, he switched the shower off and sank down to sit on the floor, his knees pulled up to his chest as if they could shield him somehow. He wanted his mom. He wanted Klaus. He wanted to be held and told that it was okay, that he was safe.

Eventually, he slowed his breathing enough to realise he was getting cold, the water having cooled on his naked body. He got shakily to his feet and dried himself off before busying himself with getting redressed. He could do this. It was systematic, routine, a way to feel just a fraction more normal, even if the clothes weren’t quite right either.

It wasn’t that he was ungrateful, but he did feel slightly strange in them. The pants seemed too fitted around the legs and a little too short, with rips across both knees. He supposed even in the future, free clothes couldn’t always be new or in best condition. But he’d be able to fix them up easily enough. He’d never been as well-taught as his sister, but he’d been so eager to copy her in whatever she was doing that his mother had decided it was easier to just teach them both.

He wondered what had happened to Marie. How long ago had it been for her since they’d last seen each other?

“Mr Katz, you have a visitor.” VINA’s voice was still startling, with no clear source and no warning.

“A visitor?” he repeated. Who was here, visiting him? Who even knew he was here?

“Would you like to allow them access to your room?”

Dave looked himself over in the mirror. His hair was still damp and the clothes may be strange, but at least he looked decent. He looked normal. He didn’t look like a man who had just been shot.

But he pushed those feelings down, squared his shoulders and kept his head high as he stepped out of the bathroom and back into the bare room. “Yeah, let ‘em in,” he agreed.

He didn’t know what he’d been expecting, but it wasn’t this. A very short man in a suit and a pair of glasses stepped into the room with an air of someone who didn’t feel quite certain how much space they were able or willing to take up.

“Hi, Mr Katz, right? I’m Herb, I’m, uh, Acting Chair here at the Commission,” the small man said with an awkward wave. “It’s good to see you up and about! And- and the timeline should be safe from any, uh, any attempts at rescue, so that’s a big bonus.”

Dave had resigned himself to the fact that everyone here was crazy. But there was something warm about Herb, something he liked. “Can you explain what’s going on? The doctor, she said something about anomalies?”

“Ah, well, in this case, we’re, uh, preventing a potential anomaly. I’ve seen firsthand what a determined Hargreeves can do, and I figured if we make sure none of them have a reason to go messing up a timeline again, it makes our jobs here easier!”

Dave’s breath caught in his throat. “You know Klaus?”

Herb giggled. “Do I know Klaus? Everyone here knows Klaus, he’s a Hargreeves . But I met him! I mean, I’m basically friends with his brother Diego, so you could say I know him better than most people here.”

Dave could barely hear what Herb was saying. His mind was racing faster than his heart, the use of ‘know’ rather than ‘knew’ enough to sustain him. He was still alive. And even if he was old now, stuck on the slow path through time, Dave knew he would still love him. He would love him until the end of the Earth. That had been a silent promise, as unspeakable as everything that they were, but as real and constant as the sun rising every morning. Forever was too much to vow in a war zone, but the intent had always been there. “Can I see him?”

“Well, that’s the plan!” Herb said brightly. “If you’re willing, we drop you off with him in 2019, there’s no need for any more time travelling shenanigans from the Hargreeveses, and we can all get back to normal!”

Fifty one years had passed. Would Klaus even still love him, after all that time? He almost couldn’t picture Klaus as an old man, not when he was full of so much energy, when he was so childlike sometimes. Was he an old man? Or had he somehow found a way back home before he had the chance to grow old? Back home... “People back home, my family… What happens to them?” he asked.

“Ah. Well, they think you’re dead. And unfortunately, they kind of had to. I’m afraid even if you turn down our offer to join Mr Hargreeves, you can’t go back to 1968. We made sure of that. And ooh, boy, that was a tricky one, but you’re not our first faked death and you sure won’t be our last!” Herb laughed, as if this was normal. As if this was simply how the world worked. And maybe it was. Maybe the world was bigger and stranger than anything Dave had ever seen. Anything but Klaus, of course. He was the maddest, strangest, most beautiful world all of his own.

In his mind, it had been just over a day since he’d seen him. But he missed him as if it had been weeks, months even. Maybe years. Did the ache dull over time? Would Klaus still be missing him as badly as he missed Klaus?

“If you’re, uh, amenable, we’ll drop you off in 2019 as soon as you’re discharged.”

It was a leap of faith into an unknown future, a new world. “I am.”

#also working on a chapter two so stay tuned for that #klave #klaus hargreeves #dave katz #tua #my content #my writing

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xxgoblin-dumplingxx · 5 years ago

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Sick Little Games: Twenty-Three

Sam stopped in the lobby, water bottle halfway to his mouth. Two boys, in their early teens, stood in the doorway. He couldn’t tell if they looked lost or scared, but they definitely looked pissed.

“We want to see out Sister,” the one on the left said, folding his arms.

“Who’s your sister?” Sam asked, confused.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” the one on the right said.

“Oh,” Sam said, nodding.

“Oh.”

As the words penetrated, he felt his heart drop. He could see it now. In the shape and shade of their eyes and the stubborn line of their jaw. “I’ll uh, I’ll make a call,” he said, jogging a little way away and pulling out his phone.

“Barton,” Clint said, yawning as he picked up the phone.

“Hey. Get Y/N. There are people down in the lobby to see her,” Sam said, suddenly anxious.

“If it’s her parents,” he starts.

“Her brothers,” Sam says. “I’m gonna take ‘em to the commons. Get the show out of the lobby.”

“Good plan,” Clint said, looking over to where you were dozing, sprawled on your belly and your ass in the air. “I’ll get her up, but... I’m gonna have to carry her. I don’t think she can walk on her feet yet.”

“Doesn’t she have a healing factor?” Sam asked nonplussed.

“Yeah,” Clint answered, “But uh, we got sidetracked, and some energy was going to other... things.”

“Ew,” Sam said, crinkling his nose.

“Hey,” he said, shrugging, “She’s hot. If she says ‘go,’ I say ‘yes ma’am.’”

Sam hangs up after that with a delicate shudder. He didn’t need that mental image. He extra didn’t need to imagine what Clint was like in bed. Though he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about you before. At least. At least the way he thought of most people he thought were attractive. Though ever since the day he’d watched you half strangle Bucky he had mixed feelings. A lot of them

“Sam Wilson,” he said, holding out a hand, “Teammates with Y/N.”

“I’m Elijah,” the one on the left said guardedly, taking his hand.

“I’m Ethan,” the one on the right said.

“Nice to meet you,” he said, “C’mon. Y/N will be down in a minute. She’s just gotta get around. Her feet got pretty torn up earlier.”

“Her feet?” Ethan said, confused.

“Yeah,” Sam said, “She was barefoot when she charged into that Green fire stuff earlier.”

Elijah crinkled his nose, but both the boys are otherwise quiet. Watchful.

“Thirsty?” Sam asked, loping to the fridge.

“Yeah,” they say in unison, and Sam smiles a little. Drinks and snacks. If they’re like all the teenage boys, Sam has ever met that’ll help. A lot.

_____________

“Baby,” Clint said softly, shaking your shoulder, “You gotta get up.”

You make a series of soft unintelligible sounds and rub your eyes, “Misson?” you mumble, rolling over, clutching the sheet to your chest.

“No,” he says gently, “Let's get you up and dressed. You have visitors downstairs.”

“Who-”

“Your little brothers,” Clint said gently, “They’re downstairs with Sam. They’re demanding to see you.”

You bolt upright and off the bed in a fraction of a second, “No. No. No. No,” you’re muttering to yourself as you hobble as quickly as you can to find clothes.

Clint watches, not sure what to do but pull on clothes of his own. He wants to see the kids. He wants to see the little brothers that you only had one picture of. “Babe,” he murmurs softly, “Slow down, it’s okay.”

You’re getting worked up. Close to tears. Worried. Scared. Hopeful. Too many feelings to effectively process. In all this mess with the protestors, you never realized that this might mean. Probably did mean that your brothers knew now that you weren’t dead. And that you’d not run away. “Easy,” he soothed, pulling you close and rubbing your back, “Shhh, just breathe. Okay? It’ll be okay.”

“They’re fucking 14 now. 14, Clint,” you murmur, “What if they hate me?”

“If they hated you, they wouldn’t have looked for you, Y/N,” he hoped he was right. He really hoped that was right, and he wasn’t giving you more ammo to use to break your own heart.

You look up at him, about to cry, and he smiles, kissing your nose, “It’s alright. I’ll be right there. The whole time.”

“Clint-” you say hesitating.

“Okay, I’ll be nearby, okay?”

“Okay,” you whisper.

He lets you go and lets you walk on your own. He wants to pick you up and carry you to give yourself some more time to heal, but. He knows that you’re gonna want to walk in on your own. You pause in front of the doors to the commons and take a deep breath.

Clint squeezes your hand gently, “Right here,” he reminds, “You just have to yell... Or throw something. Lucky and I will come in and save the day, okay?”

You nod slowly and walk through the doors. And Clint watches in slow motion as the two boys are off their chair and running across the tile. It’s all slow motion as you fold them into a hug, crying and tousling their hair. And something unclenches in his chest. They love you. They really love you. And, not for the first time, Clint wished his older brother loved him the way you loved those kids.

________

After the initial hugging and crying came the questions. And the pleading.

“Please,” Elijah said, “Please don’t make us go back.”

You exhale slowly, “I- guys. I can’t just take you from Stirling and mom. You’re their kids.”

“You're an Avenger!” Ethan protests.

“Yeah, but I can’t just go around kidnapping people,” you tell them squeezing his hand.

“But, we came to you!”

“I know,” you soothe. “I know. And I’d give anything to be able to keep you with me but right now? Right now, I gotta look into my options, okay?”

They exhale slowly and nod, “You won’t forget about us?”

“I didn’t forget in 12 years,” you say, pulling the photo out of your pocket. A Christmas morning. The boys sitting one on either side of you with piles of presents. They look at it and smile a little.

“You had short hair,” Eli says softly.

“Yeah. Mom cut it off after I colored the ends with a sharpie at a sleepover,” you tell them.

The trade looks and you smile a little, “It’s okay. I was awake. And she used Kitchen Scissors. Not an axe.”

“That time,” Ethan said, touching his own close-cropped hair.

“I just need time,” you tell them, “Keep your heads down, okay? Be good boys. Be obedient. For now. Call me if anyone puts hands on you and I’ll take care of it, you hear me?”

They nod and you smile a little, “Now. Go. Get out of here before they realize you’re gone, okay? One of you text me when you get there.”

They nod again and hug you as you kiss the sides of their heads, “I love you,” you tell them.

And in that moment, they aren’t half-grown. They’re tiny and waiting on a bath and a bedtime story. Things that shouldn’t be your job but are because the revival is running long. As they leave you sit rooted to the spot staring at your hands.

You need to talk to Tony. You need a favor. But first, you need to talk to Clint.

Tags:

@lancsnerd, @thorfanficwriter @blameitonthecauseway @etherealwaifgoddess, @stevieang, @beautybyfire, @sunmoonandbucky @mrsfox79, @bbmommy0902, @mendes-fan, @iheartsebastianstan, @wtfcas @pinknerdpanda, @process-pending, @ladifreakingda, @leasly, @coldbookworm, @hv-chw3, @past-perfect-future-tense, @starkrobb @beardburnsupersoldiers, @petlaufeyson, @queenoftheunderdark, @potatoheadthewise, @thehyperactiveteen, @thefridgeismybestie, @boyett514, @an-awkward-human-1, @sunshine-and-riverwater

#Clint Barton x reader #Bucky Barnes #Bucky barnes x reader #fluff #angst #siblings #past child abuse mentioned #Sam Wilson

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kindofcashton · 5 years ago

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𝕕𝕚𝕤𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕕 • chapter 3 (Calum Hood AU)

BY THE TIME we got back to the house it was far past midnight, and none of us could walk straight, except maybe Calum. He never seemed to show just how much he drank, as his movements weren’t as clumsy and uncontrolled as the rest of ours.

I had spent the night dancing and drinking overly sweet fruity concoctions. Calum had disappeared from the bar, which was a welcome discovery as I hated the way he always looked at me those burning eyes. I didn’t like how self conscious and nervous I was around him, so when he was nowhere to be seen I confidently ordered my fruity drinks and actually let loose for once.

He went right up to his room once we got home, but I went into the bathroom with Hannah to change and take all of our makeup off. Peering into the mirror, I saw my eyeliner had smudged slightly and my lip gloss was practically gone. My cheeks were flushed from alcohol and the heat of the club, my hair tousled and not as refined as it had been when we left. In a way, I thought I looked hot, and even cracked a smile at my reflection.

Hannah caught this in the mirror and laughed, hooking an arm around my shoulders and pulling me into a hug.

“We got this Scar, you and me. This can be fun, I promise.” She sounded so sincere, and I hoped some of her optimism spread to me. I could use every bit I could get.

I couldn’t believe just a month ago the two of us had been at school, our biggest worry being the next exam or which jock was going to hit on us in the dining hall. My heart yearned for those times, when my future was set in stone and I knew what to expect. I had dreams back then, dreams to help people with my career and make a positive change in someone’s life. Studying psychology to become a social worker had been my goal for as long as I knew, and I was good at it. My professors all told me I’d make a great counselor, and my grades reflected this.

And then, one by one, the pieces in my life began to fall apart. My family never had much money to begin with, but my parents managed to send me to a decent college, with lots of loans of course. I knew I’d need a job as soon as I graduated, but that over time the debt could be managed. All of this changed when I got the phone call. It was late at night, but I was up studying. I had just spoken to my parents the night before for our weekly chat, and everything was fine.

How quickly those things can change.

The doctor was vague on the phone, or maybe I just couldn’t comprehend what he was telling me. Didn’t want to comprehend it. His words were simple, but strung together they made no sense.

What did he mean car accident? Where were my parents even going? How come the 18-wheeler that slammed into them didn’t stop? Why were they the ones that got hurt, when the other driver walked away scratch free?

I knew the word coma, but I didn’t foresee all of its implications. Brain bleed was mentioned too, as well as circling the drain. All of these words and phrases jumbled up in my mind, until I snapped and asked what the hell he was talking about.

Needless to say, what little money we did have went towards the medical bills. My dad died two days after the crash, the impact of the accident turning out to be too much stress on his body. Before I’d even accepted he was gone my mom took a turn for the worse. She hadn’t woken up after surgery, and would crash every other day. I stopped counting the amount of times the doctors revived her, and even slept through a few of them.

They asked what I wanted to do when she was finally pronounced brain dead. What was I supposed to do? A twenty-one year old college student, overwhelmed with work and the fresh death of my father, and I was asked to just unplug my mother? Stupidly, but caught up in the petrifying stress of it all, I insisted they keep her alive. This intensive care was expensive, and hemorrhaged every last dollar we had until I had bankers and lawyers knocking down my door. The day I finally did say goodbye to my mother was the day my university told me I wouldn’t be able to stay if I didn’t pay the monthly fee.

Blinking rapidly, I was brought out of my nightmarish memories and back to the present. Basically kicked out of college, with barely a cent to my name, Hannah was my lifeline. We were quite the pair of misfits, as she had essentially flunked out of her classes and been dismissed by the principle. The two of us made a pact to tell no one the truth, and come home like nothing happened. I’d work to get my degree some other way, and she would try to figure out a different path. Without her, I don’t think I would’ve survived.

“I’m gonna take a shower, unless you want to go first?” Hannah asked me, rubbing her alcohol-reddened eyes. I shook my head, suppressing a yawn.

“I’m too exhausted, I think I’d fall asleep under the water. I’ll take one in the morning.”

She gave me one last tight hug before I left the bathroom, holding my crumpled outfit in my hands as I crossed the hallway to my room. The sleep shorts and oversized tee shirt I wore were a welcome change from the tight clothes, and I dumped them in the hamper before collapsing onto Michael’s bed and falling asleep within minutes.

- - - - -

I woke up to my head hammering. This hangover was one of the worst I’d had in a while, I suppose because I hadn’t drank like that in a while. It took all the effort I had to get out of bed and head to the shower.

Holding my bathrobe and shower supplies, I noticed the door was closed but the light wasn’t coming through the bottom, so I gave a quick knock.

As my fist collided with the wood, it suddenly swung open to reveal an angry looking Calum. Everything in my hands fell to the floor with a clatter. I bent down to pick them up hastily, glancing up at Calum with a frown. His hair was wet and curly, sticking up at all angles. A towel hung loosely from his waist, and in my half-conscious state my dreary eyes dragged down his glistening wet skin. My stare was obvious, and it made a cruel smirk curl onto his lips.

“Morning. You look great.”

His comment stung, as I was sure I looked awful. My hair was a mess, my eyes surely dark with circles and fatigue. I sighed, and said in a tired voice, “Sorry, I was just going to take a shower.” When I finally had all my things I stood straight up, still overwhelmed by Calum’s towering frame.

He snorted, and without another word pushed past me towards his room. I was too jostled to react, instead just closing the door behind me and leaning back against it in defeat. Would Calum and I ever find a common ground?

I pushed the dark-haired boy out of my mind as I turned on the water, twisting the nozzle to almost as hot as it went. The droplets scorched my skin as I stood under the rain, washing my limp hair and exhaling in relief. Hot showers reawakened my senses, and today I needed a boost. Today I planned on finding a job, and I couldn’t be sleepy and hungover when meeting prospective bosses.

Climbing out of the shower into the steamy bathroom, I toweled off my damp hair and swiped a hand across the foggy mirror. In the small strip I’d wiped away, I saw the slight bags under my eyes and a dull look in the green orbs. I was almost glad I couldn’t see the rest of myself.

Tying off my robe, I exited the bathroom and went downstairs to get some breakfast. Hannah was at the table reading a magazine, and Luke had his head in the fridge searching for something to eat. Michael and Ashton had already left, and once again Calum was nowhere to be seen.

“Morning, sleeping beauty,” Luke greeted her with a grin, leaning on the top of the fridge door with his forearm. “You feeling the effects of your wild night out?” Somehow when Luke teased me, it made me smile; the complete opposite reaction I had when Calum mocked me.

“Oh yeah, this headache is really fun.” I instantly headed for the coffee, knowing some strong caffeine was just what I needed.

Hannah waved her magazine at Luke. “If you think last night was wild for the two of us, think again. We got into some crazy shit at school that you haven’t even seen yet.” Luke put his hands up in defeat, and I shook my head and chuckled as I joined Hannah at the table.

“Oh yeah, because jello shots are really out of the box.” I took a sip of the steaming coffee, not even caring that it burnt the tip of my tongue.

Hannah’s eyes tracked Luke behind us until he disappeared into the other room, upon which she pressed her palms to the table and sighed.

“Ashton must have asked me a million questions last night,” she hissed under her breath, and I set my mug down worriedly.

“About what?” Even my whispered words wavered slightly.

“What do you think? You, me, why we’re not at school right now when everybody else is. And I know Ashton wouldn’t just ask me if the other guys hadn’t told him to, which means they’re dying to know too.”

I bit my lip, a thousand thoughts running through my head. “What do they want to know? I mean, we just met, I’m not gonna tell them my whole life story.”

Hannah nodded. “I know, and I’m not exactly thrilled at the idea of telling Ashton I flunked out.” Her voice was thick with disappointment, and I reached across the table to give her hand a sympathetic pat. I knew Hannah was secretly really embarrassed and ashamed of her grades. Even though Ashton never went to college himself, Hannah wanted to prove she wasn’t an idiot, since he was always considered the smart one of the pair. She also couldn’t face her parents, as they would surely throttle her if they found out she left school.

I sighed, and ran a nervous hand through my damp hair. “Look, I have every intention of going back once I sort things out, and I’m sure if you can figure out a different school and just lie and say you transferred.”

She laughed darkly. “Transferred to a community college? Oh yeah, I’ll be a laughing stock to my family.” Hannah shook her head, as if to clear these negative thoughts. “Whatever, that’s not important right now. But you’re sure you want to keep the stuff about your parents quiet? No one would judge you, Scar, if anything they’d--”

“Pity me,” I interjected. “They would pity me, and that is the last thing I want from the guys. I want their respect first, and then maybe I’ll tell them.”

Hannah shrugged. “Whatever you say, but it can’t be healthy to bottle it all up inside--”

“Bottle what up inside?”

Of course Calum strode in at this very moment. He had changed into joggers and a black muscle tee with holes around the collar. His hair had dried and was thick around his forehead. He reached for the coffee and as he poured himself a cup, his mocking brown eyes watched us at the table.

“We’re talking about emotions and feelings, Calum, something you would never be able to understand,” Hannah fired back, causing him to scowl.

“Damn, ouch,” Luke laughed as he reentered. “What a lovely morning this is shaping up to be.

The four of us ate in relative silence. I was glad when Luke sat next to me so that Calum couldn’t. He sat diagonal to me, eating the same frosted cereal as yesterday. I was sick of the quiet in the room, and decided to speak up.

“I’m gonna go see about that job at the cafe,” I informed them. “Never too soon to start earning money.”

Luke set his orange juice on the table. “I would offer you a ride, but Mike and I share the station wagon and he’s already gone. Same with Ashton.”

Hannah’s piercing blue eyes slid to Calum next to her, who hadn’t looked up. When he realized we were waiting for him, he glared across the table.

“What, I’m supposed to jump at volunteering?”

I repressed a sigh. I didn’t exactly want Calum to drive me, but clearly that was the simplest answer. However, I wasn’t about to show him I relied on him and let him toy with this like he always did. Instead, I shook my head.

“No, I don’t want a ride. I think it’ll do me good to figure out the bus system. I don’t ever wanna rely on any of you for a ride, you already do too much.”

Hannah and Luke nodded while Calum rolled his eyes and returned his attention to his cereal. Straightening my posture, I refused to let his rudeness affect me. I needed to be confident today, and someone like Calum knew just how to strip this away.

I left breakfast to get ready, opting for a nice pair of jeans and simple sweater with a jacket. I liked looking put together and composed; it helped me feel that way on the inside.

“Wish me luck,” I called at the front door, and I saw Luke give me a thumbs up from the kitchen.

“Go get ‘em, girl!” Hannah yelled. Calum remained stoically silent.

There was a bus stop at the corner of the street, and I pulled up the schedule on my phone. Hannah had given me the address, and I was pleased to see it wasn’t far at all. God, I hope I get the job, I thought, chewing my lip. It would make this stressful time that much easier.

The bus came and I took a seat close to the back, peering out the window and familiarizing myself with the area. It was a great city, and a part of me could see settling down here.

No, the goal is college, I reminded myself. This is meant to be extremely temporary. And besides, no matter how much I liked the city it would always feel like I was borrowing it. It belonged to Hannah and the guys, the same way the house did. I would always be a guest here, would never feel like I was really meant to stay.

The cafe was earthy and quaint, and upon stepping through the door I was hit by a waft of roasted coffee. There was in fact a hiring sign outside, with quite a few exclamation marks, which would hopefully work in my favor.

I approached the counter confidently. “Hi, I heard you guys were hiring and was wondering if I could fill out an application?”

The worker looked relieved once I asked. He was around my age, with black earrings and a nose ring. His name tag read Roger. “Thank god. Mack was convinced we’d never find an applicant. Hold on, I’ll get him for you now.”

I smiled, pleasantly surprised at his enthusiastic answer. A minute passed, and Roger returned with an older man, who thankfully didn’t look too intimidating. He had graying hair and a bushy mustache, and smelled strongly off baking scones.

“You’re here about the job?” He got straight to the point, and I smiled as I pushed a lock of hair behind my ear.

“Yes, absolutely. I have my resume right here, and was just hoping to get an interview today, whatever you wanted.”

Mack waved his hand dismissively. “Lemme see the resume.” I reached into my bag and pulled it out, handing it over with a breathless grin.

“I’m still enrolled in college,” I said quickly, embellishing my story slightly. “I’m earning credits for my degree from home right now.” I hoped the explanation sounded mature and not like an excuse I was desperately trying to push.

Mack studied the paper in a matter of seconds, and slapped it on the counter. Roger was grinning behind him, arms folded.

“I’m gonna be honest with you,” Mack started, and I nodded. “I really need the help right now. Normally, I’d screen a few applicants and worry about experience and whatnot, but I just don’t have the time. So how about I give you a two week test run, and if I think you’re a good fit I’ll hire you officially?”

I had to stop my jaw from dropping to the floor. How is it this easy? I thought, thinking surely there must be a catch. Glancing around, I saw that the cafe was well attended and pretty nice overall, which was encouraging. The only downside to Mack’s offer was the lack of pay for two weeks, but that was honestly fair with such an easy application process.

“Deal,” I said, extending my hand for a shake. Mack smiles hugely and shook my hand, eyes twinkling.

“You just saved me an awful lotta stress, Scarlett,” he said. “I really hope you’re the one for the job.”

I left after thanking him again profusely, and had to hold in a squeal. I called Hannah immediately to gush about my success, and she said we had to celebrate. We spent the day window shopping and trying on expensive clothes we’d never buy, but she made me swear I’d buy a tight cream colored dress once I got my first paycheck. Hannah insisted it made me look like a million bucks, and I had to admit I liked that idea.

By the time we got home it was well after dinner and the guys had disbanded. Michael and Luke texted saying they were with some friends getting a drink, and with Calum’s missing mustang I assumed he was with them. Hannah got a surprise call from her parents once we walked through the door and hastily ran downstairs to take it. A few times I heard her raise her voice to a yell, and I knew they must have found out about her leaving school.

Poor Hannah, I thought as I brushed my teeth, staring into the mirror. I looked radically different from this morning; though I still had on an oversized tee shirt and shorts, my eyes were sparking with confidence and exuberance at getting a job, and the hangover had finally cleared along with the dark circles. My cheery mood continued as I strolled downstairs, starving as I decided to make a simple sandwich and catch up on some reading.

The yelling stopped and I assumed Hannah had gone to bed, so I was peacefully alone in the kitchen with my book. I was so engrossed in it I barely heard the front door open. Unfortunately, I couldn’t ignore Calum swaggering into the kitchen to grab a beer, and I swallowed a bite of my sandwich nervously.

“Hey,” I said tentatively, praying he wouldn’t be mean for once. Something was off about his appearance; his tee shirt was wrinkled and his belt wasn’t fully done on his jeans. His hair was super messy and his eyes were glazed, and I spotted a dark mark on his neck.

Oh.

“Why are you still awake? It’s like 3am.” He flipped open his beer and took a swig, taking in my appearance at the table.

I hugged my knee closer to my chest and shrugged, a few pieces of hair escaping my bun to block my eyes. “Not really tired.”

He met my eyes, and I tried to hide the fact that I knew what he’d just come home from. He didn’t seem as cocky as normal, his hook-up actually subduing his sharp attitude. I still felt wildly uncomfortable under his close brown gaze though, and it took everything in me not to shy away.

Finally, he broke the stare to take another sip of beer. “Goodnight, Scarlett,” he said before disappearing upstairs, and I stayed rooted to the spot in shock for a few moments more.

I don’t know what shocked me more; his lack of cruel comments or the fact that he’d actually used my name for the first time.

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imagine-the-energon · 4 years ago

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We Were Wrong Chapter 4

Annabelle makes a few decisions

As soon as we landed, the storm cut almost all electronics with the exception of the Cybertronian ones, which was a godsend and a half as I don’t think I’d be able to lead the mission with only one working arm and leg. “Meerkat, Llama, see if you can get the extensions for the shuttle to work. Bunny, try to keep an eye on the radar to see if the scanners can cut past the interference for Spark Signatures. Jag,” the woman in question looked up, eyes shining. “Suit up; you’re with me on perimeter.”

“Roger that, Commander Draco.”

——————————————————————————————————-

I squinted at the makeshift scanner as I ran it up and down the rock where the signal was supposed to be coming, confusion building as it said that there was something Cybertronian in it. “Bunny, you got anything?”

“Commander, I’m getting a signal twenty miles south that match a spark signature! It appears to be fading in and out.” she replied quickly. “I recommend moving the shuttle closer and calling Stormreign and Steelbane in so that they can carry the Autobot back to the ship for repairs.”

“Understood Bunny. The rest of you, return to the shuttle. We have an Autobot to rescue.” At their confirmations, I spared another glance towards the rock, a heavy feeling coming over me. What if this was a trap? Sparing a glance around, I took the end of her gun and slammed it against the stone, grinning as a crack big enough to slip my hand through formed. Reaching in, I felt the piece of tech and used my cybernetic arm to pull it out, frowning at what I saw.

“Commander, everyone is accounted for except you.” Jag’s voice cut through my thoughts and made me jolt.

“Apologies. I got sidetracked for a second. ETA five minutes.”

——————————————————————————————————-

Putting on the Eco-Mask was the last thing I wanted to do, but the distressed spark signal was coming from the middle of the storm, so while Meerkat and Bunny stayed in the shuttle to contact the Knights, Llama and Jaguar followed me as we waded through all types of dead foilage, finally coming to a clearing. In the middle were two mechs, a cherry red one and a sunshine gold one. Baffled, my gun lowered for half a second as I searched for facial recognition. The red one came up as Sideswipe, who was last seen with silver armoring. Would that make the gold one his twin, Sunstreaker?

“You… you’re humans?” Sideswipe’s voice had me gripping the gun a bit more tightly, but I nodded. “Why are you here? Haven’t you done enough?” The pure desperation, sorrow and hate in his tone had my heart clenching and I took a deep breath before holstering my weapon, reaching up to unlatch the helm.

“Commander, we have no idea what the storm will do if you do that!” Llama hissed, having holstered his weapon as well. His voice was distorted, and it sounded… wrong. I didn’t want the mechs to think I was more of a threat than I really was.

Taking a deep breath, I undid the helm and took it off, feeling my hair fall from it’s bun. “Sideswipe, yes?” I asked, feeling my throat tingle as I had to raise it in order to cut through the storm. “I am the Dragon Commander. Earth is dead, killed by the Decepticons. We found a spark in distress, and with allies aboard our ship, we thought you might like it if we were able to stabilize your brother.”

“These allies, who are they?” He demanded, though there was a spark of hope in his optics. In reply, I heard Dragonstorm let out a roar, flying towards us with only one head. “Knights of Iacon? They’re real?”

“Real, and willing to aide you two. Their base is on our ship, as well as fresh energon and medical supplies.”

——————————————————————————————————-

“You’re an idiot, I hope you know that,”

I let out a little laugh at Scorpion’s words from the other side of Quarantine, well aware that while he meant it, he meant it lovingly. “Yeah, but I’m your idiot. I got Sideswipe and Sunstreaker safe and away from that Ion storm, so maybe they’ll help take us to Optimus.”

“Maybe,” he murmured, resting his head on the glass, and a half second later, I did the same thing. “I love you Annabelle.”

I felt a small smile show on my face as I stared at him intensely, trying to memorize the soft look on his face. “And I you, Robert.”

——————————————————————————————————-

By the time I was cleared to leave Quarantine, Sunstreaker had been treated and both were online and completely replenished with Energon. And yet… and yet…

It felt like a hallow victory as I stared at the report in front of me.

Estimated Earth Date August 23rd, 2010, 1239: Optimus Prime has been offlined. The Autobots are no more.

“Damnit…” I whispered, reading the report over and over again.

Optimus Prime has been offlined…

“Damnit…”

The Autobots are no more…

“DAMNIT ALL!”

——————————————————————————————————-

Robbie came back just in time for me to fall to my knees, our room thoroughly trashed. “Annabelle?” he gasped out, rushing forward. “What’s wrong?” I didn’t trust myself to say anything, so instead, I shakily held out the report, watching as his features grew grimmer and grimmer. “So what now? We go to Rhaki?”

“No,” I instantly shot down, grief and self-disappointment swimming in my head. “We go in search of the others. Ironhide, Ratchet, Jazz, they were part of the top command for the Autobots. We have to find them.”

“Annie,” he whispered. “Our mission failed. Rhaki is the only way.”

I stared at the report, hand going to the dogtags around my neck. “There’s always another choice,” I found myself saying quietly. “Have you ever wondered how Megatron was able to be revived? How Blackout and Barricade came back after we saw them offline with our own eyes?”

“I’d assume the Allspark,” he said quietly. “But as far as I know, there were only two shards left, and the Autobots left with one.”

“I think… I think it has something to do with The Fallen. A-according to the… the report, he came to Earth the same day that…” I trailed off, eyes shutting and fists clenching. “There’s something else going on, Robert. Something bigger that we’re not paying attention to.”

——————————————————————————————————-

Annabelle Lennox…

There was something in the air, something that made me walk closer towards the ever bright light.

Annabelle Lennox…

“I’m here,” I whispered, reaching forward. A warm sensation crawled up my arm, and I watched in fascination as white Cybertronian runes tattooed themselves onto my skin before fading away. In a brilliant flash, the light disappeared, showing a teenager I just barely remembered. “S-Sam? Sam Witwicky?”

“Annabelle Lennox, you have been chosen.” He offered his hand, with a sad sort of smile. “While I am not the Sam you know, I am a part of him, and before that, I was once a part of Optimus Prime.”

I furrowed my brows, mouthing the words back before I felt something… click almost. “You’re Primus. You’re what it means to be a Prime.”

“Yes, but no. I am only a part, a fraction of a whole. Fate changed her mind at the last second, when she should have kept steady, and because of this, I am no longer as I should be.”

“It wasn’t supposed to be like this,” I mumbled, feeling something churning my gut. “Why are you contacting me, a human, instead of one of your own?”

“You are the last hope of many, including me, Dear Child. You are right to believe that there is another way, but the path before you is dangerous, and lonely, as such is being the price of Prime.”

“So there’s a way to revive Optimus? Is there a way to bring back Earth and Cybertron?” I demanded, a small hope starting to bloom.

“No. Earth, even with a God’s blessing, would not survive for long, and to bring back my former body would begin a collapse in the core. I am sorry, truly, but those worlds must stay dead.”

I stared at his still outstretched hand, debating. “What does it mean, to be a Prime?” I finally asked, quietly.

“That, I’m afraid, is only something you can answer.” His response left me burning with more questions, but I took a deep breath.

“Will becoming the next Prime make it easier to find the rest of the Autobots?”

“Should you wish it, yes.”

With a tense nod, I put my hand with his and almost collapsed from the burning pain that coursed through me. Unable to stop my scream, I could faintly hear Robbie yelling for medics in the background. Finally, the pain stopped and I found myself on a stretcher, gazing at the ceiling.

It is done. Thank you, my child.

——————————————————————————————————-

If anyone said anything about me having to be wheeled out of my quarters, no one said it to my face, especially as I was able to direct the next jump towards another series of planets in this system, aiming towards one of the larger moons.

“Are you certain they’ll be here?” Robert asked during our lunch hour as I poked at the food, not very hungry. I closed my eyes and tugged on the golden thread that had appeared the night before, grinning slightly as I felt shock and amazement flow back.

“Yes, I’m certain.” I answered before forcing myself to take a bite. He got up from the table and I felt a sharp stabbing pain of doubt. “I love you, you know that, right?”

“Always. I love you too,” he replied with a blinding grin and kissing my nose. I could hear a few privates coo, and when I glanced over my shoulder, they quickly turned back to their meals, making me smile myself.

——————————————————————————————————-

The Autobots – Jazz, Ratchet, Ironhide, Bumblebee and a black and white mech I couldn’t identify – were waiting for us as we landed the ship itself, and I could feel their confusion and slight horror from the state of it. Ensuring that all Commanders and their XOs had our best Formal wear on, we were the first ones to march, ensuring that our hands were above our heads at all time. I was the last out alongside Scorpion, and as we came into view, I saw their panic turn into anger.

“You have younglings in command?” Ratchet sounded aghast and I forced myself not to give myself away then and there, though it probably didn’t help that my command circlet was bigger, brighter than the others.

“Going by their helm adornments, the last two are in charge of the ship as a whole, while the others are subsystems.” I saw the others tense up, most likely wanting to look back at me for a reaction. Instead, I forced myself to stay calm as those not in Cryo slowly started to step back onto land for the first time in years, eyes wide with wonder and a hint of fear as they milled around the ship. Deciding it best to keep space between them, the ‘Bots led us away and allowed us to lower our arms, where I had to listen to Grizzly and Ironhide bicker about what to do with the other.

Jesus fucking Christ what the hell is wrong with him?

I glanced around at the adults desperately trying to keep the children away from the conversation that was happening in front of them. “For God’s sake, this isn’t getting us anywhere,” I snapped, pushing passed the others to stand in front of the Autobots.

“Draco!” Grizzly snapped, but I ignored him.

“Either you agree to help us or not. We were wrong to do everything we did against you, and now we’re suffering for it. Earth is dead and the Decepticons are on their way here. Either you help us, or you watch the last of our species die in front of you.”

“Bold words for a human,” the black mech snorted. “What’s your name?”

“My mama raised me to take no shit, and I’m Annabelle.” I saw something flash in their optics as a toothy grin began to show on my face. “Annabelle Lennox.”

#The Oracle Prime Legacy #We Were Wrong #Transformers #Bayverse #Transformers Bayverse #Annabelle Lennox #Annabelle #Annabelle (Bayverse)#Original Characters #Ratchet #Ironhide #Prowl #Sideswipe #Sunstreaker #Jazz #Bumblebee #Primus as Sam Witwicky #maccadam

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spaceskam · 5 years ago

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ah! @acomebackstory reminded me that it was femslash february! I didn’t even notice that it was february! anyways here’s a little fic for you! lets see how many days of february I can write a wlw story. day 2!

“This isn’t going to work,” Jenna said dully as she stared at the four full dry-erase boards Liz and Michael had filled with mathematical equations. This was the fifth time she’d just harshly shut down their ideas and Liz couldn’t take it. She whipped around to face her, a level of anger in her system that felt foreign.

“Why must you always be so negative, huh? You aren’t helping, Jenna! You come here and you just say no. No, no, no! If my ideas are so bad, why don’t you give me one of your own?!” Liz spat. Jenna didn’t seem phased by the outburst, raising an eyebrow.

“Max died by giving up all his energy. He needs an energy surge if we want to bring him back,” she said. Liz let out an exasperated laugh, throwing her arms out.

“What do you think I’m trying to do?!”

“I think what you’re doing is overkill,” Jenna said. Liz scoffed.

“Excuse me?”

“Why aren’t we just getting Michael and Isobel to practice and revive him together? Like, that’s the kind of energy he needs, not artificial shit,” Jenna said, waving towards the boards. Liz opened her mouth to bitch more, but Jenna shut her down with a look. “And you need to calm down.”

“And how exactly do you expect me to do that?” Liz asked. She would be lying if she said she hadn’t been at a level 10 of stress for the last four months. She really was on the end of her rope. However, in her defense, having someone constantly say you’re going to fail wasn’t really a good way to relax.

“I don’t know, do what a normal person does and get drunk, sleep with someone random,” Jenna suggested. Liz huffed and fell onto one of the stools.

“You sound like Maria.”

“If two people are saying it, then maybe it’s a good idea.”

“Sex isn’t the solution to everything, you know,” Liz pointed out. She stared at the math on the board for a few more seconds before picking up her phone and texting Michael to see if he wanted to try something a little more natural. “The man I love is dead. I’m not really looking for sex.”

“Okay, valid,” Jenna said. Her boots tapped against the floor with each step as she walked towards the board. Liz glanced up from her phone and tried really, really hard not to focus on how good she looked in those jeans. That was a very bad thought for a stressed mind to have. “Maybe just get the girls together and chill.”

Liz almost laughed, “Get the girls together?”

“That’s what you do, right?”

“I-I don’t even know,” Liz said. Jenna turned on her toes to face Liz again. She cocked her head to the side. Liz took a deep breath.

“Fine, let’s go get drunk,” she said, “Come to the hotel I’m staying at. We’ll get plastered, bitch about how stupid Max is, and hopefully get you to relax.”

It took a few seconds, but whenever Michael sent back a ‘let’s wait until the next storm’, Liz couldn’t find a reason to say no. There was no point in sitting in that stuffy room and stressing herself out until the next storm. She looked up at Jenna.

“You buying the alcohol?”

“Why would I offer if I didn’t already have a well-stocked collection?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

Liz watched as Jenna downed half the bottle of her sixth beer in one gulp. Her own bottle hovered beside her lips the whole time. If this night had taught her anything, it was that a woman drinking looked a lot less stupid than a man drinking. Especially when they were both laid up in a king-sized bed.

“How do you think Max would feel about us drinking together right now?” Jenna asked, smirking just a little as she used her thumb to wipe the corner of her lips. Liz sucked in a deep breath and let the alcohol guide her to stare a little too long. Alcohol was lovely that way.

“I don’t know, why?”

“Because he’s full of himself and would probably expect a catfight if we ever had a one on one conversation,” Jenna scoffed. An involuntary laugh bubbled out of Liz at the thought. She wasn’t wrong. During the reopening of the UFO Emporium, it hadn’t been too bad, but they also had a lot more things at play. Other than that, she barely spoke to Jenna. Hell, she hadn’t even known her first name wasn’t Cameron until after Max died.

“Yeah, but I don’t know why. I think we’re a lot alike,” Liz said. Jenna hummed from the back of her throat and Liz felt it in her stomach. It felt like a wakeup call which was more than a little overwhelming. She ignored.

“You think we’re alike?”

“I mean, yeah,” she scoffed, “We don’t look alike, far from it, but personality-wise? We both don’t put up with shit, we both work our asses off no matter what, and we both want to do what’s right. As far as types go, Max has a very clear cut one.”

“I guess you’re right,” Jenna said, shifting onto her side. She stretched her legs out and basically forced Liz to notice how long they were. Was that even legal? “I think I royally fucked up being into him, honestly, because he’s so not my type.”

“Oh yeah?” Liz asked, turning to lay on her side to face Jenna. She took a sip of her beer and hoped it’d clear her head. It absolutely did not. “What’s your usual type then?”

“Uh, short?” she offered. Liz couldn’t help but laugh. “Fun. Dedicated. Levelheaded. Gorgeous.”

“Max is gorgeous.”

“I didn’t mean gorgeous like that.”

“I mean, but have you seen pictures of him with long hair?” Liz asked, “He looked good.”

“Yeah, he did,” Jenna agreed softly, “but that’s not what I meant.”

“Oh, what’d you mean?” Liz wondered. Jenna took a deep breath and tilted the bottle back, letting the rest of it go down without spilling a single drop. Then she turned her eyes back to Liz.

“You’re gorgeous.”

Liz felt her face turn hot and she had to look away for a minute. This wasn’t happening. Absolutely not… Was it?

“Thanks,” Liz said, “You’re pretty too.”

Jenna huffed a laugh, “Yeah, thanks.”

They fell silent for a minute and Liz thought about it a little bit longer. She thought about Jenna being the only one to be honest with her about her ideas on reviving Max. She thought about how Jenna was the only one who successfully got her to relax. She thought about how Jenna had thighs so nice that she would gladly be suffocated by them. She looked back over to her.

“You’re pretty,” Liz repeated, “I have no idea what’s going on, but you’re pretty.”

“Okay,” Jenna said, laughing just a little. Liz watched as she leaned over and grabbed another beer and there were those fucking thighs again. She pulled the cap off with her bare hands which just seemed to get more impressive each time she did it. “You’re drunk.”

“So are you.”

“Yeah, but you’re also confused,” Jenna said.

“Maybe I’m not,” Liz said. It was way too obvious and something she knew was stupid, but she was staring at the only person who stood up to her since Max died and that was hot. She was so, so, so, so hot.

“Liz, what are you getting at?” Jenna wondered, voice a little tired. Liz licked her lips and stared at her.

“You said meaningless sex earlier.”

Jenna laughed out loud, “With me?”

“Why not?” Liz asked, “Unless you don’t want to.”

“You’re drunk and you’ll regret it,” Jenna said.

“Ugh, no I won’t!” Liz whined. Saying the words out loud made her even more intrigued. She’d kissed a couple girls in her life, but that was when she was in college and she didn’t really consider it to be an option. Staring at Jenna now felt like a legit option. She was an option.

“Your boyfriend is dead and you’re curious,” Jenna said, “You will absolutely regret it.”

“Fine,” Liz said, falling onto her back, “Fine, I won’t do it while I’m drunk. But tomorrow, when I’m sober, if I’m still interested, can we at least try?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Jenna laughed, “But sure.”

Liz went to sleep with a determined smile on her face.

Twenty-four hours later, Liz found herself in her lab alone with Jenna Cameron again. This time felt different because it was different. This time she had the remnants of their conversation on her mind and a long-buried desire showing its face. The more she thought about it, the more it felt like a fantastic idea.

“So,” Jenna said, raising an eyebrow, “You’re staring at me like you’re about to pounce.”

“I’ve been thinking about it logically and I think you’re right. I don’t know if I’m going to be able to revive Max and I’m obsessing and I need to get my mind off it.”

“I don’t remember saying all that.”

“You said calm down and that’s what you meant,” Liz said and Jenna didn’t argue, “But I don’t think having sex with a stranger is a smart idea. I need a distraction, yeah, but the question is who.”

“Ah,” Jenna said, crossing her arms over her chest, “Me. You want me to be your distraction until your boyfriend comes back because that’s what girls do, right.”

“No,” Liz scoffed, shaking her head, “That’s not what I’m saying.”

“I’m not here to be your plaything, Liz. I fucked up by saying I was into you and that’s my fault, but you’re not allowed to use that against me,” Jenna pointed out. She had this way of speaking sometimes that just too much. She took no shit and her body language and her voice showed it. Liz wasn’t used to people talking to her like that. She liked it.

“I’m not trying to,” Liz insisted, “I just… I need… I want-”

Jenna managed to cut her off with a deep, controlled breath. Liz gulped as the woman took a few steps closer. God help her.

“If I hook up with you, what happens with Max?” Jenna asked, “What do you tell him? Do you lie? Do you brag? Do you use it to turn him on, tell me.”

“Cam, I promise, the way you make me feel has nothing to do with Max,” Liz replied honestly. Jenna quirked an eyebrow.

“He’s still your boyfriend.”

“Yeah, and maybe I need a challenge.”

‘And you don’t feel bad for cheating on your dead boyfriend?”

“Listen,” Liz sighed, “Is it even cheating? Max has been dead for months. Nothing I’ve tried has helped. I have no idea if anything I do is going to bring him back. I don’t want to waste my life on something that might not happen. I want to do something for me for the first time since he died. If I manage to bring him back, I’ll address the situation. For now… I really, really want you.”

“Oh, you want me?” Jenna asked, her tone bordering on mocking. Liz let out a breathy laugh and noticed just how close she was. Her stomach clenched and she gulped softly.

“I want you.”

It took two more steps and Liz was cornered between the table and Jenna. She was damn near buzzing with excitement. Nothing had made her feel so eager since… Since nothing. She was going to explode.

“You should probably say that again,” Jenna told her, hands grabbing her hips firmly. Liz felt a chill go down her spine at the same time that hot breath hit her lips.

“I want you.”

Liz didn’t have a single regret.

#jenna x liz #jenna x liz fic #jenna cameron #jenna cameron fic #liz ortecho #liz ortecho fic #roswell new mexico #roswell new mexico fic #rnm #rnm fic #my fic #femslash february

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sureivy · 5 years ago

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is that HALSEY? no, that’s just IVY CALDER. SHE is TWENTY-FOUR years old and is an EMPLOYEE AT DON’T FRET & PAWS 4 LOVE. rumor has it they’ve been in town for FOUR MONTHS / TEN YEARS. on a good day, they’re CREATIVE & VERSATILE. but watch out! they can also be IRRESPONSIBLE & VOLATILE. TRIGGER BANG BY LILY ALLEN (FT. GIGGS) plays in my head whenever i think of them. can’t wait to see them around springhill!

hello my pals ! i’m amy ( 20 // est // she/her ) and i am super excited to be here! we also over here bringing back a fairly old muse (i,, apparently,, play her during election years,,) with a couple of tweaks, so we love that for me! also! pls forgive me if this is lowkey disorganized, we’ve been in and out of airports all day! can’t wait to contract that sexy corona!

QUICK FACTS:

full name: ivy rose calder

date of birth: may 2, 1995

*does not perfectly reflect the below big three zodiac chart because that’s too much math

zodiac big three: taurus sun, pisces moon, aquarius rising

gender & pronouns: cis woman & she/her

sexual orientation: bisexual ( preference for women bc we luv that for her but we also luv leaving things open to chemistry )

education: high school diploma

enneagram: 7w8?

mbti: enfp

moral alignment: chaotic neutral

positive traits: creative, versatile, passionate, compassionate

negative traits: irresponsible, volatile, impressionable, hedonistic

BACKGROUND INFO:

triggers: brief implied sexual abuse, suicide, a lot of death talk?, drug abuse ( desoxyn ), overdose

ivy lived the first eight years of her life in newark, nj. she had a mere family of three – her mother, a model-turned-stay-at-home-mom, her father, a politician, and herself. she was much closer to her mother, but she and her father were close at night.

when her mother finally found out about this, she wasted no time in taking ivy’s father’s side. what a good mom! instead, ya girl was already getting in touch with cps herself... but wow... it was gonna ruin his career in politics :\

“Now, one thing I lerned from Storys is, when something big is about to okur, a riter will go: Then it hapened! This tells the reeder: Get Reddy. Here I go: Then it hapened!” - fox 8

then it happened!

humiliated, clearly never getting a platform back, and absolutely bitter, ivy’s father killed himself before being sent to prison.

Very Tragique™

ok. so. to distance themselves from the poor memories, but to save money, ivy and her mother moved to springhill, temporarily sharing ivy’s aunt’s apartment while her mother began collecting enough money to buy an apartment of their own and keep it.

during this time, ivy was seeing a lot of people and she didn’t know why! they asked questions about her mental health, but she didn’t know why! i mean, totally not traumatic, right?

yes. instead of managing communication well, she became very fascinated by the concept of death. she had many questions about it, she, a youth, had some extended conversations with clergymen about it –– she never killed any animals, god forbid, but she was absolutely fascinated when she ran across them.

SO CLEARLY THAT WAS ALSO TRYING TO BE DEALT WITH.

ok, i’m gonna skip ahead a little. now in teen years and still fascinated by death, but in a healthier way!, and no longer in therapy because... like... that costs a lot of money!

she dealt with it the best she could. became enamored with music... because why wouldn’t she? some covers here and there, some originals here and there, living that youtube lyf, but not expecting anything to come of it. just liked validation! mood!

she also dealt with it the worst she could! became enamored with drugs! naturally, it started out small. some weed, some lsd, some molly –– you know, just drugs that you don’t typically think of as addictive. although her grades suffered, it was harmless enough...

upon graduating high school, she figured... no college. instead, with barely any money to her name, she was like “i... will go to new york... and i will become famous.”

and she did! she did go to new york! she found a few sketchy places that didn’t charge much for a few nights as she began networking - both socially and “i would like to be known for music” (i literally just forgot the word for networking like..... employment wise.... y’all i’m so dumb). when she’d made some friends, she began crashing on couches that were not quite as sketchy!

but :\ she did meet these friends in sketchy places :\ and they were like “ok here r some new and more addictive drugs for u to try!”

what she wound up abusing using the most was desoxyn. it kept her awake, it kept her focused, it even shed a few pounds to create an excellent figure! what wasn’t to love!

i mean it’s literally a prescription methamphetamine,,, when abused,,, literally almost exact same effects as meth,,, but when meth mouth, skin lesions, acne, etc aren’t occurring as a side effect? who was she to care!

20, she released an actual ep with the help of a super cool friend who made everyone call him puppy mills! wow! things were excellent! it wasn’t necessarily seeing mainstream traction, but there was a decent enough following! enough to release an album at 22!

perfect timing, btw! desoxyn was starting to become too expensive for puppy to afford and trying to fake having such a severe form of adhd that desoxyn would be prescribed as opposed to something like ritalin or adderal when it’s literally illegal to prescribe in some countries now?? too hard :\ but the money from the album helped her and puppy!

*olaf vc* puppy died. *end vc*

she was there for it too. she thought it was just a freak-out, took a LITTLE too much, but not OVERDOSE worthy... then he l i t e r a l l y died. and it was a painful death!

“oh wow! maybe prescription meth isn’t super cool after all! shucks!” but that was also an opening?? to visit death herself?? like... she didn’t necessarily want to die (sort of), but she wanted... an answer to the question that had plagued her her entire life... so she was like “ok hope i die then someone revives me but if i die then :\ i guess i die!”

did not die. but also did not get a satisfying answer to her question. the only way it would’ve been truly satisfying? if she had been dead for longer than a minute - then it would’ve given a definite answer! because the answer she received was just nothingness which, while peaceful... is it true?

she tried to detox alone, what because rehab is a business, and it... only... sort of worked. she would be clean for a few weeks, then fall back in, then clean for a few weeks, then fall back in. whenever she wasn’t just naturally focused and awake, or whenever what she was focused on was the past, she would fall back in.

i mean, a side effect is memory loss, so win/win!

she made the semi-wise decision to move back to springhill. wisest would’ve been to just move to a town/city she had absolutely no memories in, but better than moving back to newark!

so... without much to show, and with an unreliable streak, she knew she wouldn’t be able to start looking for much of an occupation – but she still needed money! so she began working at don’t fret out of a love for music, then began working at the animal shelter after completing training.

the main training was, of course, for putting animals to sleep.

FULL CIRCLE.

ah yes. how she pretends it’s healthy... even tho there are studies and statistics relating suicide to veterinarians and shelter workers who euthanize animals... ah yes.

has been back for four months now. love that. do not know how to finish this.

TL ; DR:

born in newark. moved to springhill at 8. childhood trauma that she is still carrying causes fascination with death. “i love music.” moved to ny at 18 because realistic. childhood trauma also causes dependency on desoxyn. releases an ep and an album. does not become famous, but they both have decent traction. moves back after an overdose. relapses... often. now sells records and puts animals to sleep. miss american dream since she was 17, amirite?

PERSONALITY / MISCELLANEOUS INFO:

one person one week, a totally different person the next.

wants to please people, but also wants to be her own person? it’s a whole deal!

in spite of her slight icarian incident, she still hopes to maybe one day become a real musician and performer. until then, we selling records and saying ‘goodbye’ to sweet animals!

can truly flip like a switch in interactions! does love ruining things for herself! almost always feels bad after bc :\ damn :\ alright :\

i’m very bad at these sections i really hate that i always include them!

is still avoiding healthy coping mechanisms. love that for her.

favorite movie is, unironically, the bee movie. favorite horror movie is cats.

SO GOOD at memorizing random lines or trivia. could probably recite literally all of who’s afraid of virginia woolf? other than that?? her memory is so bad. hate drugs for that :\

she uses her hair to express herself! (that sounds really boring.) ...she uses her hair to express herself!

but no. seriously. wears the black shag weave the most, followed by the blue/yellow combo ( we stan the badlands aesthetic ). occasionally forays into other colors and styles when money permits, but it’s usually gonna be one of those two!!

was an envy on the coast stan in high school which makes an inappropriate amount of sense.

will go out and steal the dumbest shit when she’s drunk. has a history of stealing chickens.

once again: hate that i always include these!! feel free 2 j consult the personality parts in the quick facts!!

CONNECTION IDEAS:

ok we gonna list some general ones for right now! all are open to multiple people unless there’s an asterisk by it!

close friends –– moonie, teagan,

ride or die

childhood friends –– moonie,

bad influence ( mutual or her on them ) –– veronica ( mutual ),

good influence ( them on her ) –– presley, hayden, gabrielle,

exes ( can be from high school or something like that if based in springhill, can be from 20s in new york if based in new york )

fwb –– trent,

will they, won’t they –– presley,

someone who knew her music ( can be neutral, a fan of it, or hate it afhkjsl ) –– presley, moonie, teagan, indiana,

will also possibly be sending in some wanted connections for things that are! more specific!

truly anything!! also up to brainstorm and/or look at yours if you have them!!

UPDATE: i have created a wc page so we luv that for me.

OK. like this or hmu if you’d like to plot!

#springhillintro #DONT WORRY THERE'S A TL;DR I. DIDNT KNOW WHEN TO STOP.#also!! am gonna leave the ooc post up for a few so i have reference for who liked it bc i must!!#depart for about an hour and a half and i do not want!! to forget!! y'all idk what im doing today.

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mythologymonsterlover · 6 years ago

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Male! Robot lover

This takes place in the same universe as CWXH story, and I enjoyed making this robotic boy.

warning: sexual content, cussing

Female reader X Male monster

My life is simple enough, well, for a police officer anyways. I worked in the force for three years now, and so far I've seen everything a person should see. Today I was driving to the station as I saw a little boy and a helper robot escorting him. I don't mean this in a rude way, but seeing one of those robot's makes a cold sweat break out on my forehead. Ever since the daughter of a famous scientist got control of her father’s companies, she has banned cyborgs in being used in the military. It took everyone by surprise that the general of the United States Military was experimenting on his own soldiers, making hybrid killing machines. Thinking about it now, it still amaze me that a high official could get away for so long doing that to human beings. Luckily, three years ago the media outlets let us know that the general was sentenced to life in prison for his crimes. It took much effort of accepting cyborg life again, but the scientist cleared the name of their organization by promising to help the disabled only. Being a police officer in training at the time, I really looked up to the organization for how they stopped continuing wars with machinery. Unfortunately, this year has not been so kind to everyone. Some how other companies manage to make humanoid symbiotic robots for the first time. These thing aren't necessarily people, but robotic materials that are made to integrate with human flesh to their skeletal frames. Sadly, this has caused terrorist groups and other deviants to get hold of the technology causing crimes rate to escalate. We at the police department are surprised, and not happy either with these new symbiosis creations. Many gentleman in the police force who have received bad injuries from these robots, refused to have anything to do with robotic technology as its seen as a evil now. Not only them, but the public are afraid of losing their human side, and have started to discriminate robotic and cyborg beings alike. It a sad sight to see, but as a police officer personally I have no choice but to remain neutral. …

When I finally get to the parking lot, I see a colleague of mine waving his hand towards me. I try doing the same, but I feel the aching pain in my right arm run though my entire being. It hurts too much, so I try casually putting it down as I get out of the car. Not to long ago I got shot in the arm by one of those robots, which caused a muscle tendon to get ripped from my bone. It’s healing, but the doctor said I won't be able to use my right arm like I used to. They offered me a cyborg arm, but I declined repeatedly as it makes me nervous and also scared. I try my best to not think about it too much, but I know it will bug me another time. I enter the building, and register myself into the police system. “Good morning!’ the receptionist, Lola, greets me with a smile, and I nod back to wish her a good morning as well. Today, I was hoping to get some police files done before anything else, and walking down the hallway to my carrel seemed simple enough. Well not for me. A crowd of my coworkers were surrounding the middle of the hallway talking loudly. I try to shuffle around the mess, but because the hallway is so damn narrow, I could barely get my body to move without having an elbow jabbed into my side. annoyed, I tap on a female officer shoulder to get her attention. “What’s going on here?” I say wide eyed, thinking that this might be a possible emergency. The women though just rolls her eyes exaggeratedly and comes next to me saying, “We have a new police officer joining the force, and his a real keeper.” I stand back confused, and try looking over the crowd to see this new officer, but everyone is just too closed to one another to see anything. I let out a sigh, not believing everyone is getting so worked up for a rookie. Finally having enough of this, I try again to push forcefully into the crowd and walk around the ever growing mass of people. When i’m finally halfway around the officers, a hard jab hits into my right arm. This causes me to fall straight to the middle of the floor, and I cradle my already wounded arm to my chest. I feel the heat rise to my head, and i'm ready to punch someone. I get up gritting my teeth, and before I could fall back down from a person hitting the back of my head, I feel a strong arm around my waist hold me up. “Whoa, easy! Are you alright?” A man’s voice says, and I could barely react until I felt a hand slid under my chin. There, I see a young man who looks to be in his twenties, and is entirely made out of robotic parts. His wearing an officer uniform, and has his sleeves rolled up to show off his blue metallic arms. His face is also made out of the metallic material, but only his left side. His right side of his face is made out of skin, and his blue eye is normal, while his left eye is red without an iris. I felt uncomfortable from him staring at me for such a long time, and I removes his hands off my body. “I’m sorry officer, I forgot my place.” He smiles a crooked grin, and turns around to face the crowd with narrow eyes. “Alright, It was great to meet you all, but let's get back to work!” all the other officers stand erect by his deep commanding voice, but all mummer irritably. Yet just like that however, each person goes back to what they usually do in the department. I’m startled to see officers listen to a robot, but glad that they dispersed so I could get to my corral finally. I walk away but feel a cold hand touch my shoulder, and looking back I see the robot rubbing the back of his head. “I’m sorry about that, and also I’m the new recruit.” He laughs heartily and I just nod my head and continue to walk away from him before he could keep speaking. Yet, I hear a pair of feet walking right at my heels as I turn into my carrel. “Is there something you need, new recruit?” I say polity but sternly, already feeling the day drain me out from the aching pain going through my arm. He looks at me blankly for a second, but just backs away with apologetic eyes. “I'm sorry, it’s nothing, I just realize I didn’t introduce myself...my name is Lex.” He reaches out for my hand to shake it, and I grab it. “Nice to meet you Lex.” After that I say my farewell, and turn to sit in the chair. I go straight to work not wanting to waste anymore time. I see Lex walk to his desk out the corner of my eye, and realize I’m sitting right across from him. He gets straight to work on the computer, and I can tell the police department is going to be railed up by our new recruit being a robot. I try not to let that distract me, and continue with my day.

…

After a week or so of Lex being in the force, he got almost every female officer swooning for him. To say I saw this situation coming to the horizon would be like saying dinosaurs came back to life. I thought these officers had at least some more self control over their emotions, but being the only reasonable one in the building I guess not. This also just made some of the girls love crazed frenzy for Lax worse when they heard I was the one to be paired up with him. Some started to act colder to me, and even talk about petty shit behind my back, saying I was probably a man and just looked like a girl. I almost choked on my coffee more then once hearing such absurd commits, and I also had to hold back my laughter from the stupidity of it all. The people who didn’t find it funny though where mostly men of the police force. They been giving Lex the stink eye ever since he arrived, and I saw one of them trip Lex making him fall face first to the ground. They laughed of course, and the sheriff had to shut them up in order to calm down the tension between them and the rookie. It took some swearing and things but it died down eventually when the sheriff threaten to fire people. Lex and I even would be gone for the entire day, and that made most of the officers relieved. Were ordered to portal a quarantine area to make sure no dumb teenagers are vandalizing it. The place is located at the most run down parts in New York City, and we parked in front of a abandoned building. Its a hospital, and it corroding so fast that the owners don’t want a lawsuit on their hand if someone dies from exporting the abandoned ghost building. As I parked the vehicle, I let out a long sigh and kick back my legs on the dashboard. Lex is tense though, and seems to be on high alert ready to take someone down. “Hey Lex, relax. You don’t need to be so tense.” I say grinning at the newbie, thinking of myself in those days. “Ah, sorry..” he glances at me once but keeps his eyes focused on the building. It almost looks like his scanning the whole thing. What a minute… “Hey since your a robot do you have x-ray vision?” I ask now as erect as him, and he nods his head once. “Yeah, I do, but I don’t really like it.” “Why don’t you like it? I say with a hint of confusion, since he was built with that function to be a police robot anyway. “What I mean is..I don’t feel real with having functions like this.” I shallow, not sure how to respond to such an odd comment. I have heard that companies have made their robot by splicing human bodies to robotic skeleton, and even revived the dead by copying their brain neurons into a robot. This then makes me think possibly, that Lex was human once. I feel sadden my the thought. With little confidence, I decide to ask him a question. “Where you human once, Lex?” I almost instantly regret my words as I see his eye cast down to his lap. He looks hurt by my words, and I feel stupid for asking such a personal question. Yet before I could apologize, he looks up at me with a hint of amusement on his face now. “I’m surprised you were able to catch on so quickly, that’s impressive.” I blush a little from seeing him smirk, and from his eyes looking me up and down for a moment. To stop myself from being unprofessional, I turn my head away coughing into my fist while looking at the building once again. “I’m sorry officer Lex for asking questions of your personal life, but I hope we can continue on our duties now.” I say in my stern voice trying to sound professional, but I hear him chuckle at my sudden change of attitude. His laugh sounds cute I think to myself, and I feel a flutter in my stomach as he turn his head away while grinning. Why the hell am I acting like a schoolgirl now? I shudder away from the thoughts as we sit in the car with one another in silence.

...

Eventually as the time flies, Lex and I where done with our shift before we knew it as the station radioed us in. I drive us back to the place, clock myself in for the day, and get ready to head home. As I get to my car, I feel my heart skip a beat when I see Lex leaning on the side of it. Instead of wearing his uniform, his now wearing an black jacket, pants, and combat boots. When I think about it, he looks like a bad boy from the 90’s with how he holds himself up now. I roll my eyes however, not wanting to think of him like that. When I’m only two feet away from him, he looks up and smirks. He towers over me by three inches, and I feel like I’m going to swoon for him just like any girl does for a guy like this. “Good evening, officer.” He says, moving away from my car door and giving me space to open it. I nod my head in greetings, and fumble with my keys as I speak to him. “Do you need a ride home, Lex?” I say this turning to look at him and he shakes his head. “No, no I don’t need a ride, but I need to tell you something important.” I look at him again, and he rubs his hands together while looking nervous now. “I’m quitting as of today.” When he tells me the news, I feel my heart sink into my stomach. I literally freeze on the spot. Did I do this, did I make him want to leave or… I feel sick for a moment, but with a lot of effort I nod my head in understanding in his decision. “I’m sorry to hear that Lex, and I hope your gonna be okay.” as I open my car door, I start to feel tears actually sting the corner of my eyes. I barely knew Lex long enough, but I felt already heartbroken to see him go. I don’t know why, but I started to actually want to know him more, but now it seem like I never will... I sit down in my car seat, and I put my keys in the ignition, but I see Lex’s hand reach in and touch my cheek. He looks at me straight in the eyes, and he parts his lips as he stares at me. “I’m leaving, but I want to keep in contact with you.” He moves his hand away from my cheek, and steps back a little to fetch something out of his pocket. There, he pulls out a piece of paper and hands it to me. “Call me whenever you want, and don’t feel pressured or anything. You don’t have to accept it.” I look down at his handwriting to see his number, and when I look up I nod my head excessively. “Don’t worry, I will Lex.” I smile up at him, and with that he waves me off as I pull out of the parking lot. Driving home, I feel a few tears go down my cheek, and when I look at the paper again I smile at the name written on it. Lex.

…

After a couple of days of texting Lex back and forth on my breaks, we both set up a date to meet up. It’s on a Friday at the movie theaters, and I’m going to meet him their at five. I didn't tell anyone about me still talking to Lex, since most of the people here are glad his not here anymore. I was cornered though the other day by an officer who seems to especially hate Lex. His older than me, and has a lot of more experience on the field then many of the officers here. His eyes are hawk-like, and when he speaks it deep as thunder booming out in the horizon. “What happen to your partner, officer?” He ask me suspiciously, and I have to gulp down my fear to speak. “I’m afraid he has resign from his position, sir.” He lets out a sigh, and rubs his hand down his rough face. “I know that, but why did It leave? Is the thing defective or something?” Now, I have to control myself from not letting out a sigh from this man’s ignorance. With little politeness in my voice I say ruggedly, “No, I highly doubt that was the reason” and walk away so I don’t have to deal with him any longer. After that ordeal with the officer, I finished hours of Friday’s work load. Then I headed home to shower, get dressed, and put on some makeup. When I look into the mirror I saw the old me again, which was surprisingly not a bad thing. I’m wearing my red dress I had for ages and golden necklace I got from my now deceased grandmother. Looking back on those days, I was more relaxed as well as skinnier, which I hate to say I miss most. I wonder even how Lex could look at me as attractive after I acted somewhat cold to him. Maybe he likes girls that are bitchy. As I’m lost in thought though I hear a knock at my door, and when I walk over to open it, I see a tall man wearing a butler uniform staring back at me. “Hello, I suppose your Lex’s date tonight?” He says with a hint of surprise, and I notice a limousine behind the man too. “Hey Fred, play nice to my date please!” I see Lex run up from behind, and squeeze in between the side of the man to get to me. When I look at him now, I feel bashful at his appearance. His wearing a blue suit with a bow tie, and his face softens at me. “You look quite beautiful tonight.” He says happily, and he reaches his hand out to grab mine. I smile back tenderly, but also I’m very confused on what the hell is going on. “Umm...how did you know where I lived?” I say hesitantly, not sure I ever gave him my address before. Lex looks back at the butler with some irritation, and rolls his eyes. “Well Fred here..got your address from a friend, and also I kinda wanted to pick you up in a fancy car, love.” He walks me down the steps and opens the door wide for me to step in. The exterior of the car is red as well as the cushions, which gives it a soothing atmosphere. I sit quietly though, not wanting to get riled up by my racing thoughts of the situation. When we finally get to the movie theater, we realize quick that it probably not gonna work out. The crowd is unbearable as the reason being a popular new movie just came out tonight. I feel disappointed at the outcome right now, but I feel a arm hug my shoulder tight. I look up to see Lex face, and he shrugs his shoulders while looking into my eyes. “Don’t worry, I knew this might’ve happened anyhow.” With that we walk back to the limousine, and Lex says an order to Fred. “Hey Fred, drive us back home for tonight!” I hear the butler make a grunt noise, and we start off again on the road. Instead of being quite this time, I decided to ask Lex some questions. “So, I’m taking it that your rich?” I laugh a little at the thought, since Lex seems like the guy who lives in a apartment not a mansion. He nods his head however, while crosses his legs and leaning back into the seat. “Well, I took over my father’s company for a little while, but I’d never really wanted to since it wasn’t my dream job. You see, I wanted to be a police officer since I was little kid, but I had to pick one profession..” He grabs a glass for in a cup holder, and pours a little bit of wine for me as he continues with his story. “So at first, I picked police officer since I didn’t want to be sitting in a chair all day. It worked out for a little while until, well, I got hit by a truck driver.” I almost spit out my entire drink all over his face, but put a hand over my mouth before I could. “That’s what happened to you?!” He lets out a chuckle, but nods his head somberly while looking out the window. “Yep. Took my life nearly, but the doctors were able to remove my brain into a holding container so I could be transferred into this body.” Lex looks at his hand and wiggles his fingers as if to make sure their working properly. He then looks back up at me, giving me one of his charming smirks. I can see how he made some girls go wild for him, and I shove his arm playfully. “Taking that you must win every girl’s heart with a sad story like that.” I say halfheartedly, but know that was probably kinda mean. I try not to think absurd, and as we get to his house I know it’s too late to turn back.

…

We enter the living room, and I’m surprised to see food already laid out before me. Knowing though Lex can’t eat, it makes me feel kinda awkward to dine in front of him. We sit their though talking a while about his childhood, mine, and what our families are like and I’m surprised he lives here all by himself. His sitting an arms length away, and I keep having thoughts of touching him. Lex seems to read my mind as he reaches out to move a piece of hair away from my face, and looks me lovingly in the eyes. I feel like this is the moment I’ve been waiting for, and I can't resist because, well, how could I? His treated me better than most men, and it’s not like I didn't see this night turning sexual. If it was with Lex especially, I could tell I would like it. So with that, I close the distance between us and place my lips on his. Their cold as ice but feel so smooth against mine. He pulls away for a moment looking startled, but seems to know that I want him to keep going. He moves both his hands to my face and slowly presses his lips harder to mine, deepening the kiss to a make out. I move my hands down his back and scoot closer to him, letting him feel my body against his. He lets out a wimpier as my hand moves to his crotch, and I’m kinda startled to actually feel something bulging down there. “You didn’t let the doctors just transfer your brain, huh?” I say with a dark smirk, knowing full well I have control of the situation. Lex seems to enjoy me touching him however, as I move my hand down to unbutton his jacket. I see his metallic chest as I remove his jacket, and I work on getting his pant’s buckle off when he suddenly stops me. “Ah, not in here love, up stairs.” Before I could even get up to do so, Lex grabs me up by the waist and carries me up the stairs. I run my hands down his neck, feeling even more attracted to his strong frame as his arms lay me gently on the bed. Looking at his metallic body above me, I watch as he moves his mouth down my bare neck, gently biting it. Not wanting to wait any longer, I gently start to tug his pants down all the way to his ankles. He kicks his pants off the rest of the way, and starts working on my dress removing it off my body. As we’re both lying in our undergarment clothing now, he studies my body by running his fingers down my thighs and stomach. He looks up at me then, placing his head on mine. “Your so soft, and warm…” He whispers, and looking at him I see his eyes look heated with a longing. I move my lips on his metallic chest, stomach, and down to his crotch area, and before I can take his boxes off, I look up worriedly. “Is this alright..if I do this to you?” I keep my hands on each side of his hips, while I keep my head up high looking at him. He smirks at my comment, and runs his hand in my hair while grinning. “Yes love, it’s more than alright for you to do so.” With that, I pull his boxers down past his waist, and his dick practically pops up. As I study it for a moment, I see veins still circulating as it’s throbs with precum on the tip. I brush my thumb on the top, and slowly emerge the entire thing into my mouth. Tasting the cum, I also taste something metal as I lick and caress his dick in my mouth. Lex lets out a low moan, and rubs the side of my face as I increase my pace ever so slightly. Soon, I have him shoving me down on his shaft hard as his about to cum. “You..ahh, so- good..” he strains out his voice as his seeds spill inside my mouth, spilling down my chin. When I suck every drop from it, he lays their motionless rising his chest up and down. I let him recover for a few seconds, but then straddle his waist letting my folds get wetter. Lex doesn’t refuse me as I emerge myself on top of him, letting it cock hit all the way to my g-spot. I feel the pleasure instantly and I have to stop myself from doubling over. Lex rest his hands on my now shaking legs as I bounce on top and moan out loud my pleasure. Suddenly, he's the one thrusting inside me and I hold tight to his shoulders, not wanting him to stop. “Ah-ahhh, Lex.” Grunting out, I feel my insides start to tighten around him as I’m close to the edge. I don’t even realize I’m screaming out his name as my vision becomes white. Then just as quickly I feel his cum fill me up inside, and he grunts loudly as I tighten even more around him, not letting a single drop spill out. I sit on his shaft panting as I recover, and he pulls me down kisses me. moving off him, I lay spread out and keep kissing him not wanting to break the moment. “You…” He says breathlessly, and kisses my neck as he pulls me into his chest. “-Your so warms..” Lex says smirking, and I kiss him hard on the cheek for being so damn cute. “your too much fun, Lex.” I say warmly, and lay my head down on his solid arm feeling my mind drift off into a sleep. “Will you stay with me?” Lex says suddenly, and I flash my eyes wide open at his comment. “What do you mean..Lex?” Being confused by his comment, I try not to have high hopes that he actually wants me.. “What I mean is - is that I need you.” He says shakily, and when I look into his eyes I can see he genuinely means it. He wants me. “I want to get to know you more, but yes, I would like that.” I reply calmly, but internally I knew I hit the home run.

#monster love #robot boyfriend #monster x human #human/monster #exophilia #Female reader #male monster #interspecies romance #interspecies couple

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