#she views (and has been taught to view) herself as there to look after and advocate for others but not herself

[bonemoat]

can't stop thinking about how last ep tula kept begging people to listen to her sister, but not to listen to her

[not-so-mundane-after-all]

I keep rewatching that epilogue scene and, the way Hunter and Omega talk about her joining the Rebellion... You can tell this is not the first time they're having this conversation. And I just can't help but wonder what the previous one(s) must have looked like.

Because something tells me it wasn't peaceful.

I just can't imagine Hunter having any other reaction than an immediate, definitive "absolutely not" the first time he hears about Omega wanting to join the Rebellion. Just like I can't imagine Omega being okay with that reaction.

Were they arguing about it? Were they butting heads and not backing down from their respective points? Because they would. Absolutely, they would.

Did their brothers have conversations with both of them separately? Did Wrecker tell Omega to give Hunter a break because he's old and worried? Did Crosshair convince Hunter that he can't keep a grown woman grounded just because he's scared about her? Did Echo tell him that if this is Omega's calling, he has to let her do her thing?

She tried to sneak off. As if she didn't want to go through this again. As if she thought leaving without a goodbye would be easier on everyone and this way no one can stop her. After all, she made up her mind. She's going. But when she turns the light on and spots Hunter sitting there, she's not even surprised. She nods to herself like of course. Of course he's here.

This literally sounds like they've been over this before. But this time the conversation is surely more peaceful. They both have the other's perspective in their minds now.

This is my choice and I know it scares you but I need you to understand.

I know I won't change your mind but I don't want you to go, I want you to be safe.

This must have been said before as well. Maybe in anger. Maybe in pleading. Or desperation. I wouldn't be surprised if Omega got very frustrated with Hunter for treating her like she's still a kid. Nor would I be shocked if Hunter had trouble articulating his point of view in all his worry and panic. But here, it's a confession. It's very vulnerable. It's the truth Hunter doesn't want to hear and gives a reason why.

Omega is a grown woman now. Skilled, capable, brave. Hunter doesn't doubt that. But to him, she's always going to be his little girl no matter how old she is and I am still speechless at the fact that we actually see him not only struggling with it but also admitting to it.

Back on Pabu, after they escaped Tantiss, Hunter told her: "We've all fought enough battles for one lifetime." And now, years later, Omega echoes this back to him. "You've all fought enough." Almost like she's reading Hunter's mind and knows that if he can't stop her, he's going to want to join her.

The way he wants to reach after her here when she gets up. Like he wants to say wait, no, don't go yet!

But this is her fight, just like she says. She's never been able to sit still, we know that, we've seen that. Just like Echo back in season 2, she can't stand the thought of staying down and doing nothing when there are people out there fighting for freedom. People she can help. She's a skilled pilot now (I can bet she'll become most famous in the Rebellion for her flawless Tech-Turn), she has absorbed everything her brothers have taught her over the years like a sponge and now she wants to use that. After years of living away from the fight, she's finally ready to get back out there and make a difference in the galaxy. Fight for peace because that is her calling.

She's ready, but Hunter is not.

You can tell it's literally tearing him apart to watch her go. That's his baby, the whole reason he's living the life he has now. He gave his blood, sweat and tears so she could grow up safe and happy and away from the Empire's clutches. And now she's going back right into them, willingly.

But she's all grown up. And he has no choice but to let her go do her thing. So he holds her close and I don't doubt sends out a prayer that she comes back to him safe and in one piece. He closes his eyes and commits the feeling to memory because who knows when will be the next time he gets to do this?

And it might be destroying him inside but he's so damn proud. And he knows she's got this. She doesn't need her old man to watch her back anymore.

And yet still this old man, with gray in his hair and beard, this old man whose posture is hunched and who is moving slowly and having difficulty standing up because of his accelerated age, is telling his very grown up and very capable daughter that if she needs him, he's going to pick up his blaster, don the armor and join her in the fight.

Because that's what fathers do.

[geekgirles]

Just Look My Way

Can we please talk about the way the lyrics have changed from the original to showcase Stolas' growth and character development?

I was already surprised that what originally looked like it was just going to be a fan video ended up becoming canon content, but when I heard the different lines my mind exploded, you guys.

Note the difference, the major difference, in treatment!

In the original version, which released back in season 1 but before Ozzie's, Stolas' line was actually:

"Come now, my little impish plaything, we've both made our choice."

Keep in mind the original most likely included this line as a reference to what both Striker and Stolas said in regards to Blitzo's relationship with Stolas. Even our dear owl boy referred to him as just a plaything while saving him from D.O.R.K.S! Which most likely only helped cement Blitzo's internalised belief that Stolas would never see him as anything other than a cheap thrill.

Here, however, Stolas is cementing him as his dearest! A loved one! Someone he values and cares for! That is a huge difference from being just a sexual partner!

And the second line. OMG, THE SECOND LINE.

Unlike the original, where Stolas speaks of a choice that, realistically, was never there (as it usually is the case with relationships where there's a power imbalance and, moreover, were born out of transactional needs), this time he is reaffirming Blitzo's agency and independence. The implied choice is clear: Stolas will present the asmodean crystal to him so he no longer relies on his Grimoire and sleeps with him out of necessity. All that's left for Blitzo now will be to choose if he wants to remain by Stolas' side even then. And the choice is his.

As a quick aside, I also love the constant symbolism between Blitzo and the Moon.

Technically, compared to Stolas and the Earth, both are just satellites, nowhere near as important as a Goetia demon and member of Hell Royalty or a planet brimming with life and where beauty and wonder happen at every corner. And yet, without them neither can thrive. Stolas is as fascinated and dependent of Blitzo as the Earth is with the Moon. Without the Moon, there's no tides; it brings inspiration and romance to countless souls, brightening the night sky, just like Blitzo brightens Stolas' life.

Blitzo is Stolas' moon, and I just think that's beautiful.

Every word in this line in particular just oozes character development, too.

The original was:

"What's left for me in this broken house if I cannot have you?"

This is no longer about Stolas using Blitzo to escape his boring routine and his horrible marriage to Stella, it's about Stolas being deeply and hopelessly in love with Blitzo and not knowing what to do to convey that in a way that will reach him.

Once again, Blitzo has stopped being a mere plaything or boy toy and become so much more. He has become an essential part of Stolas' life he doesn't know what he'll do without but knows he'll have to let go of if that's what Blitzo wants!

Now, I must admit I am not exactly a fan of this change in these particular verses. On the one hand, I understand it's meant to reflect Stolas is trying to understand Blitzo and see things from is point of view, but I also feel it robs the moment of the raw feeling the original conveyed:

"Is this how she'd feel? Abandoned, all alone, left to fend for herself, for a semblance of happiness that doesn't have to end?"

"She" clearly referring to Via.

I just think it would have been more powerful to keep it and allow that juxtaposition between the most important people in his life to help Stolas understand Blitzo better. After all, he loves them both dearly and unconditionally, but his actions have also hurt them both very deeply.

I just think it'd be fitting if one allowed him to understand the other better.

Nevertheless, if there is something this song has taught me, is this: we are so not ready for the next episode.

[the-froschamethyst4]

Spurs and Chaps

𖤐Pairing: Bounty Hunter! König x Outlaw! Reader

𖤐Pronouns: She/Her

𖤐Warnings: smut, fluff, language, old friend to lovers, enemies to lovers, mention of violence, guns, P in V, age gap, groping, nipple play, badass Y/n, kissing/making out,

𖤐Summary: König the bounty hunter had to bring in outlaw Y/n but does he really have to bring her in?

————

————

"Little lady you must have me as a fool?"

"No, sir."

Y/n puts the tip of her heel into the dirt as she flirts with the man in front of her. She just wanted one thing from this man, his money.

"Oh yes!"

"Fuck," loud moans filled the room, the man trying to keep his pants up as he has Y/n pinned to the wall behind her, he bucks his hips up into her, she moans, gripping his hair and kissing his lips.

They both fell on the soft bed behind the man, Y/n undressing herself, her holster on her thigh containing her pistol, she kisses down his chest to his stomach, one hand guiding down and then other resting on her gun.

He looks down at her and sees her hand on her gun.

"Hey, wait a min-" before he could speak another word, he was shot with a lead bullet between his eyes.

"Fucking disgusting," she says, getting off the guy and grabbing her skirt and dirty tank top, she digs around for his sack of gold and soon found it, she smiles and sticks it inside her shirt. She finds her boots and her long black leather coat, she heads out of the whore house and grabs her hat on the way out.

"Another one bites the dust," she says, opening the satchel on her horse's side sticking the gold sack into with all the others. She starts to sum as she gets on the back of her horse. She clicks her tongue and starts walking out of the bum rusted town.

She was acting cool and collected as if she say didn't just kill someone and robbed them.

----------

"Heard she's in Rosewood...you might want to check there...König."

"Tell me again...who am I after?"

"Her name is Y/n L/n, her bounty the highest I've ever seen, even for a woman, $790,000, not even Bonnie's bounty was this high. Was raised by her father who turned out to be Good Old Cyrus L/n, robbed the whole North City blind, was caught and rotted away in prison. Y/n was taken to an orphanage where she raised herself to become an outlaw, it started off as candy stealing then soon made it's way up from pick pocketing, now, she kills then takes." The Sheriff says.

"Sir, her last slighting was in Rosewood, now she's being on the move," his deputy says.

"Well, then, I guess you better get moving, Bounty Hunter."

"I'll see you when I have her."

"If we see you again," the Sheriff says.

König loaded up his horse, clicked his tongue and went South to Rosewood hoping he'll run into Y/n.

---------

It's been a few days, and Y/n has settled into a small town called Winslow, it was like her little hideaway, everyone knows who she is, but no one will ever give her away to the Sheriff and his Deputies.

Y/n sits on the back porch of her little home, she was in some jean shorts, and small white tank top that showed off her hardened nipples and her black boots.

Y/n was cleaning her old clothes she worn, she goes back into her lovely home and she grabs some whiskey from her top cabinet and opened the bottle, chugging some of it. Heading back outside to hang the rest of the clothes.

"Y/n..." She stops what she is doing and turns to see.

"König? How's the Bounty Hunting going?" She asked, knowing he's after her.

"Oh you know...I'm here for a little someone," he says.

"Me?" She says, her back turned to him.

"It's been a while, I just wanted to...catch up with you before, I take you to the Sheriff."

"How? Hmm? What could you have in mind, Bounty Hunter," she giggles at him, she stood up to face him, he looks down at her getting a view of her chest.

"You're a tease, just like I remember," he says, putting his hand on her cheek.

König and Y/n were old friends, even though they grew up differently, Y/n was taught to steal and be a bad person and König was taught to be a good guy. Growing up differently but still how became friends. They don't even know how it happened, and when they got older König picked up being a bounty hunter and Y/n was on the run from law enforcement.

Now did König and Y/n have some sort of relationship? Yes. Again they don't know how it happened, it was just a simple one night that turned into 3, then 4, next they they knew it 5, but it had to stop, it would look bad for a bounty hunter to be sleeping with a bounty.

It would ruin König's reputation.

"Did you take the job because of the money or to see me, again?" She asked him.

"I guess the money...I didn't know I was going after you till I was called in to help."

"Called in? You mean, you didn't see my WANTED paper? The Sheriff called you in?"

"Yeah. He asked for...the best of the best," he says.

"I see," she says, she walks past him, her hand sliding on his chest as she was heading inside. "If you want...you can come inside, König."

he smirks and follows her inside the house. She kicked her boots off at the back door.

"Take your shoes off, I don't want dirt tracked through my house."

"Since when did you ever care about the dirt?"

"Since I've lived here, I love my home, and want it clean and nice and neat," she says.

"But you kill for fun."

"And I can keep my personal life out of my work life."

"Killing is work?"

"Yep," she then turns to him. "Tea?"

"Water is fine," he says.

Y/n gave him some water and then watched him chug it, she smirks up at him, she bends down and kisses his chest down to his stomach, lifting his shirt and kissed his toned stomach.

"Liebe (love)."

"Do you think, I'll ruin your reputation?" she asks, looking up at him, he cups her chin.

"You know you will," he says.

"Good," she says, standing up and kissing his lips. She then pulls down his mask, "There's that face, I've missed...I could ruin you so easily," she teased.

"You ruining me? Doubt it," he chuckles.

König picks her up and slams her back to her wall, her legs wrapped around his waist, she then kisses his neck, he groans, he plops on her messy couch.

König then removes his jacket, and removes his shirt, he then tries to unbuckle his pants, but Y/n ends up helping him. Pulling his pants down and taking them off him, she kisses his bulge, he groans, cupping her chin.

"Fuck, I missed you," he says, leaning down kissing her temple, she moves back to laying on top of him.

"I've missed you too," she says, kissing his lips.

His hands roamed over her body. She then sits up and starts removing her clothes, König then helps her removing her tank top and kissed between her breasts. Kissing her breast and licking at her bud.

She moans, holding his head and playing with his hair, and kissing the top of his head. König then messes with her shorts pulling them off.

König pumps himself a few times, before sliding himself into her. She put her head back moaning his name and squeezing around him, he puts his hands on her waist, she starts rocking back and forth, König smirks, the sex was nice, and soft. It's suppose to be meaningless sex, but it's hard when König still loves Y/n.

Y/n looks down him, leaning over him, moving her hair on one side of head and then kissing his lips. She then starts moving a bit faster.

"No, no, keep going slow, take your time, don't rush anything," he says.

"It's just been so long."

"I know," he cups her face and starts kissing her face, then under her chin and then her lips again.

Y/n looks down at him, he slowly starts to sit up, holding her close to his body, as he bucks his hips up but she started to do the work again, bouncing up and down on him.

"God, you feel so good," König says. He loves feeling her gummy walls holding his cock inside of her.

"You do too," she moans, putting her head back. His hands then start going up her chest and squeezing her chest and playing with her nipples. She moans and looks at him.

"Are you g-going to turn me in?" She asked.

"Do you want me to turn you in?"

"No...I want you to myself, I don't want to be in jail," she moans.

"Aww~" he teases her.

Y/n then could feel herself about to cum, König smirks as cum shoots up into Y/n. Y/n smirks and then bounces a bit more and felt herself squirt on his lower stomach.

He smirks, chuckles a bit, Y/n then leans forward and then kissed his lips.

----------

König laid naked on Y/n's bed, Y/n next to him, he could turn her in so easily, but he can't do that to her. König looks over at her and moves her hair from her face.

"You can go if you want to," she says.

"No...not yet...I want to be here with you," he says.

"You can leave."

"No, not yet," he says, moving closer to her and holding her to his chest.

König kisses her forehead and kissed her lips, he holds her close and moves her hair from her face.

-----------

König was on his horse, looking at the house being light up by small lamps, he was leaving for the night, he doesn't know if he'll come back and see her again, but he wonders if he should put a small hold on bounty hunting and come live with Y/n for a little while.

He travels back to West Dale to see the Sheriff and tell him the news.

That he could not find Y/n.

Y/n woke up to no one next to her, she pats the cold empty spot next to her and thought about König, he's been gone for...so many years and now he came back to have sex with her and left, he didn't bring her in, so did he care about her?

----------

It's been weeks now. Y/n was on her front porch, she was doing some house work, putting up nice plants, around the house.

"Need any help?" Y/n stops and turns to the man's voice.

"König?"

"Have you done any killing lately?" He chuckles.

"Never," she teased.

"Could you help me with the other hanging plants?"

"Sure, liebe (love)."

[co-dependance]

I’ve seen people talk about the main theme of the owl house being acceptance, and I think they’re completely right about that. But I haven’t really seen anyone look at the sub themes depicted in the show around the acceptance theme.

Specifically how the owl house is really advocating for child autonomy. Specifically in the ways of discipline, showing that communicating and talking with children ends up being a lot more beneficial and effective than punishing them.

The most obvious example comes with the collector, where instead of talking to him, King’s dad punished the kid by putting him in essentially time out, for the actions of his siblings. Which he would’ve learned if he had talked to the collector. And then following that, every interaction before talking with Luz, has the collector being used or placated in some way instead of being treated like an actual child due to the amount of power he has. The titan trappers revering him as some sort of god, Belos manipulating him, and even king attempting to appease the collector, instead of really talking to him. Though for king it’s a bit more understandable. Even so, the show showcases the collector’s change only after he’s talked to like a person, and then shown why his views were wrong.

Luz, who’s the main focus of the show, has her character arc and journey centered around being punished for her not fitting in at school. And while, yes, some of Luz’s antics that were shown seemed to be legitimately dangerous, the real solution would’ve been to talk with her and teach her about safety and why bringing wild animals and fireworks into a school building is dangerous. It should have also been that Luz should be able to talk and negotiate with her teacher about what would be acceptable for her projects with her endless creativity. The solution was not to essentially punish Luz for being creative, and what that only did was make her feel worse about herself and more isolated from the people she thought would be on her side. And then we were shown in thanks to them and for the future, Camilla’s growth into understanding that not talking to Luz about this, and essentially forcing her into normality, was not the way to go about things.

And we see this theme again, with Willow forced into the abomination track because her parent’s thought that was what was best for her, until she was able to showcase her skills and switch to what she was actually good at. Alador realizing he missed a lot of Amity’s growth by not talking to her, and then making it up to Amity by letting her set the boundaries and reestablishing their relationship. Odalia being controlling and not listening to her children which lead to actively harming their social development, until she was confronted and then shut out. Belos manipulating Hunter, isolating him, and abusing him, not even listening to what he had to say. And all of these situations were made better and more bearable when they were given the chance to take charge and be heard.

All this, in an attempt to showcase that children can be vulnerable and malleable, but they are also smart and understanding. And instead of deciding what a child needs, it’s important to communicate with the child instead, asking what they need and listening to what they’re saying. And implementing that by guiding and supporting them, not attempting to control them to what someone else thinks is right.

Children are smart and observant, they just need to be taught how to communicate, and viewed and thought of as actual human beings.

In a way, the owl house is attempting to advocate for it’s audience, and that’s beautiful.

[sadokasochism]

I am destroyed over the whole god/worshipper dynamic and have no idea how to adequately put it into words.

I mentioned in another post that Mizi could not fathom Sua ACTUALLY dying, or comprehend what death really meant, and attributed this to her relatively comfortable and sheltered life as the pet of Shine. She was not taught to conceptualise death as a loss, and she never faced any opposition to that world view. From what we know, she might have never really known true, lasting pain or loss before the end of Round 1.

However, her reaction could also be due to her placing Sua on a pedestal as her personal god and universe. She viewed Sua as her absolute everything, and why would any faithful worshipper believe their god could be killed? Only, while Sua was everything to HER, that perception did not carry over to their captors. Mizi's love and devotion was not enough to save Sua. Forces stronger than them both took her away like she was nothing.

How must Mizi have felt, having her perception of Sua as the centre of the universe shattered that way? Coming to the violent realisation that Sua was just another human, and that humans are indeed that vulnerable and disposable? That Sua could now only exist in memories and in the visions that haunt her? That Sua is not a god, but a ghost?

Now we look at Till's perception of Mizi. Again, in an earlier post I mentioned the tragedy of Till falling for someone who did not have a reason to leave. He had a lot of blind faith in Mizi, and it could be said that he idealised her as a paragon.

It's not hard to see how he reached this point. The poor kid had not been shown a lot of kindness in his life, and so meeting someone who was genuinely good and so full of joy must have had a huge impact on him.

However, his faith is still a blind one, but in a different way to Mizi's blind faith in Sua. He is happy to endure any amount of horrible treatment and does not expect anyone to help him. He doesn't resent Mizi for being so close to their captors, for her dreams stopping at Alien Stage. He doesn't resent her after he gives up on his chance at freedom and is subjected to who knows how many more years of pain and torment at the hands of their captors (Not that Mizi is at fault, Till made his own decision that Mizi likely never even knew about).

He sees Mizi's innocence and ignorance to the cruelty of their reality as something wonderful instead of a character flaw that prevents her from saving herself or her loved ones.

Sua has the same issue, seeking comfort and bliss within Mizi's brightness instead of acknowledging the cruel reality of their world. Maybe she felt sharing her perspective with Mizi would dim Mizi's bright spirit, and so she was more than content to wait out the clock with her god.

Maybe Sua felt that meeting Mizi, loving her and being loved by her in return, was nothing short of a miracle after the life she had lived before Anakt Garden. Maybe she felt in light of that, aspiring for something like freedom or a long, long life of happiness with the person she loved the most was asking far too much. The time she got with Mizi was already a miracle, why expect or demand anything more?

If Sua was afraid of Mizi losing her brightness, no wonder she was so affected by Ivan's lecture about becoming a source of trauma for Mizi after her death.

Ivan's view of Till as his god is a bit different. He is similar in that he doesnt seem to demand his devotion be reciprocated, he just wants his god to acknowledge him as a person, as someone that is at least PART of Till's universe, if he can't be all of it.

He is also very willing to become a martyr for his god while expecting nothing in return but Till continuing to live. He acknowledges Till as vulnerable and falable in a way that Till doesn't with Mizi, and Mizi didn't with Sua. He knows damn well that while Till is the centre of HIS universe, their captors certainly do not hold Till in that same regard. He knows that love and devotion in a vacuum does not save anyone.

Which is why he was always the one to free Till, to try and escape with him, and why he pulled the stunt he did in Round 6. Ivan knew that actually making an impact in this world required personal risk and sacrifice, because their captors don't give a fuck if you're in love or if that other pet-human they're about to kill means everything to you.

Till knew this too, but his idealised version of Mizi is too perfect to be broken and beaten down by this world the same way the rest of them have been. So he's still shattered by Round 5, seeing how far Mizi has fallen and then not knowing if she's alive or dead, but knowing for sure she is far out of reach. I wonder, did he regret not running away with Ivan at that point? Did he wonder what all those years of suffering were for, if he was just going to end up losing Mizi anyway? If this world was able to break her too, no matter what he did?

Mizi is gone and changed forever, and nothing he did could stop it. His love and devotion and sacrifice wasn't enough. He failed his god.

In Round 6, Ivan is faced with the same thing. His god has lost his fighting spirit, is changed forever, and Ivan's love and devotion wasn't enough to save him. The last thing he can give is his life, and hope that will be enough. Just like Sua. But he was never Till's god, was never even part of his universe, he probably won't even leave a ghost behind. So, the choice is obvious, really.

They're all so desperate for hope and connection in this lonely, painful existence that they make a person their entire universe, and then are repeatedly crushed when they are shown again and again that their soul-consuming love for one another is seemingly meaningless in a world that views them as infinitely disposable.

[souliebird]

[[and then I met you || ch. 4]]

Series: Daredevil || Pairing: Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader || Rating: Explicit

Summary:

A one-night stand years ago gave you a daughter and you are now able to put a name to her father – Matthew Murdock. Everything is about to change again as you navigate trying to integrate your life with that of the handsome and charming blind lawyer’s and Matt realizes he needs to protect his new family from not only Hell's Kitchen but from the world.

pt: 1 | 2 | 3

words: 4k

As you walk to the park that is a few blocks away from the diner with Matt and Minnie, you allow yourself time to think. 

Minnie is tucked into her stroller, Scooby Doo and Pig clutched firmly in her arms. She is excitedly updating Scooby about the drama that is the ducks at the pier. Matt walks beside you, his cane in one hand, held up away from the sidewalk, while his other lightly grips at your elbow. Neither of you talk - he's probably concentrating on walking and listening to Minnie babble. You wonder how often he's walked with someone while they push something - it seems awkward. 

Which has got you thinking about the best way to get around when you are all out as a family. The stroller is great storage, but you can transfer that into a backpack pretty easily. The problem is you are not sure if you can carry Minnie for that long.  She's small for her age but you're not that strong. She's been walking more and more, but you don't expect her to make a big jump so soon. 

Maybe you can invest in a wagon. You are sure there must be one somewhere you can buy that fits your needs. It's not like Matt is the first Blind parent ever. 

You add it to your mental research and buy list. You also need a Braille labeler - you know for a fact Minnie is going to want to learn it to be like her father and you'll need to label everything anyways. It will help you both learn. 

Your mind won't stop whirling and adding to your list - it's jumping from fun to practical to everything in between. You wish you could get out your phone as you walk to type everything up, so you won't forget later. When you get to the park, you'll do just that. You have a feeling Matt will be too preoccupied to care if you're on your phone for a bit.

You can sneak in some pictures, too.

The pier isn't as crowded as you expect it to be for a Saturday. People are milling about but most of the benches along the walking path are open.  There are a few couples having picnics on the grass and some at the tables along the river having lunch. 

You have a preferred spot in the corner of the park - there's a bench that faces the grass and the river, so you can sit while also watching Minnie. It also has a good view of the fountain, so it is perfect for duck watching. As usual, no one is there so you lead your little group there. 

As you come to a stop, you describe where you are to Matt. You try to be accurate without sounding condescending. Then you jump into the plan, "I have a blanket in the stroller. We can lay it out and we can play here, and we can also sit on the bench while Mouse does her thing."

Matt hums his approval, "that sounds perfect. Do you need help setting up?"

You turn the question to Minnie, "Do you need help setting up, Mouse?"

She looks up at you as she works on unbuckling herself. She scrunches up her face as she considers the question then shakes her head, "No, I'm a Big Girl. I can do it by myself. Thank you…" She trails off as she tries to remember the rest of the phrase. This isn't something you've taught her - she's picked it up from you apparently. She remembers after a beat and smiles up at Matt best she can from the angle she's at, "Thank you for asking."

Matt looks so surprised by her adorable politeness. You chuckle as a grin spreads across his face before he answers her. 

"You're very welcome." 

You hold the stroller steady, even after putting on the break, as Minnie climbs out. Instantly she turns back around and sets her toys where she was sitting.

"You have to wait here," she says as she buckles Pig and Scooby back into the stroller. 

You look over to Matt as Minnie starts to pull things out of the storage space. He's got his head tilted towards where she is piling things in the ground, this soft little smile on his face. He looks so relaxed and happy. You wonder what is going through his head - if this is anything like he thought it would be. 

None of this is how you thought it would be. You never considered this could be a possibility - being here with him and Minnie, enjoying time together as a family. It makes you kind of giddy thinking this could become a thing. You could come to the park on Saturdays and watch the ducks together. 

That's something you never had as a kid. You never had family outings. You went to school and went home - that was your childhood. No family vacations. No weekend getaways. No special trips. You were lucky if you were allowed to accompany your parents to dinners out. 

You never felt wanted as a child.

Minnie is never going to experience that. You love her to the moon and back and you let her know at every turn.  You show her in every way you can think of that she is your world. 

You don't expect Matt to feel the same way you do, even if you are pretty sure he's already head over heels for his daughter. You know he must be extremely busy running his own firm, but you hope you'll be open to your idea of spending this time together. Lunch on Saturdays, then coming to the park. It's a perfect little outing. 

You make a mental note to ask him.

Minnie is efficient in her setting up. She spreads out the blanket, making sure it's laid out flat. Then she brings her backpack over and pulls out her notepad and crayons and the cutest thing is she is narrating all by herself.

"And I brought bubbles, too! And my sunglasses!" She shows Matt her stylish Barbie sunglasses before unfolding them and putting them on. "We match!"

"We match?" He confirms, his voice getting a touch soft. 

"You match," you say with a smile. "Her glasses are a little more pink than yours. And cat eyed."

"Mommy, put on yours too!" Minnie requests, and who are you to deny her? You pull your sunglasses out from your purse and perch them on your nose.

"Now we all match," you tell Matt with a bit of a shy smile. Your little one loves to feel included and dressing like you is one of her favorite ways to do that. You have a feeling it will be no different once she gets closer to Matt and she will start to mimic him more. The glasses are just the first step. 

Of course, Minnie doesn't register that her sweetness is having an emotional effect and continues on by pulling one of her many paper maps out. You're lucky that such things are out of style - it makes them extremely cheap. You bought a bunch of random map booklets online for about twenty dollars and giving them to her was a bigger event than Christmas. 

You watch her unfold it and lay it out on the blanket and can't help but smile. You lean towards Matt to update him once you realize Mouse has distracted herself and has stopped talking. 

"She brought one of her maps with her and now she's trying to figure out which way to turn it. I think it's safe for us to go over now." 

You unlock the stroller and offer your arm out to Matt, letting him know you have done so. He gently takes your elbow, and you lead him the few feet into the grass. He uses his cane to find a free space to sit and lowers himself to the ground, somehow managing to sit legs crossed despite his tight slacks. You angle the stroller, so Scooby and Pig are watching over you before joining everyone else on the ground.

Attention turns back to Matt as you settle. Minnie looks over to him, her smile lighting up. She moves to be between the two of you, crawling on her knees to do so. 

"There's duckies by the water," she tells Matt as she plops back down.

"Would you mind telling me about them?" He asks, voice taking on just a bit of emotion. You know it's something Mouse can't pick up on, but it makes your heart sing a little bit. Seeing Matt react to your daughter and how much he wants to interact with her makes you emotional in all of the best ways. 

You turn a little so you can get a better look at the fountain - there are some ducks milling about and you are extremely curious how Minnie is going to describe them to Matt.

"They are over there!" She points to the fountain, then to your great surprise, uses her non-pointing hand to take Matt's hand and over her own. He seems stunned as well, as it takes him a few beats before he starts to feel over her little fist and discovers which way, she is directing his attention. 

"That way?" He confirms, motioning in the same direction. 

"Uh-huh, and there's…there's one. Two. Three. Four! There's four ducks," she counts, moving her hand to try and show him where each duck is. Only they are grouped pretty close, so you don't know how helpful that is. It's the thought that counts.

"You're really good at counting," Matt praises and your little one lights up.

She puffs up her chest and proudly declares, "I can count to six."

"You can count to six?" He repeats, sounding in awe. You really don't know if it's genuine or played up, but either way you find yourself grinning. 

She answers in the affirmative before starting to describe the ducks. They are more brown, but she tells Matt they are yellow. You don't correct her - you want Minnie to describe things to Matt in her own words and get comfortable with it. You can ask him later if those little details are something he wants depicted as accurate. For now, you let Mouse and Matt bond. 

She drops his hand once she's done showing him exactly which duck is which, then jumps into actions. "They are sitting and brushing their flappies with their nose. Mommy says that is their bath."

"That's right," you affirm, "they don't have a bathtub, so they use their beaks to clean their feathers." You always try to relate new concepts back to things Minnie will understand. She gets she has to brush her hair to keep it clean and not tangled and you told her feathers are like the ducks' hair, but their brush is their beak.

"Ducks are stinky and need lots of baths," she tells Matt with lots of confidence. She's never told you the ducks smell bad before, so you are amused by this new information. "Dogs are stinky, too. But not Scooby, he's not stinky."

"I think dogs are stinky, too," Matt says in agreement, this little smile starting to grow on his face like he and Minnie share a secret. The knowledge they have something else in common spurs your daughter on.

"There's a doggie over there," once again, she picks up Matt's hands and directs him towards a nearby couple with their dog. "He looks like a snowball. And that doggie," she points them another way and you have a feeling Mouse's new goal is to make sure Matt knows all the animals in the park. 

You take this opportunity to get your phone out so you can write out your notes. But, first, of course, you snap a few candid photos of Minnie sitting beside her father, hand and hand, talking about dogs. You catch a one you will definitely want to print and hang - Minnie beaming up at Matt mid-sentence while he looks like he is enthralled by every word. You can't help yourself and also record her telling him about an old fat dog someone is walking. 

You are sure you'll want to look back on this moment in a few years’ time.

Or maybe tonight.

You have to pull yourself away from the camera app and force yourself to switch to your notes. You already have something going for things you need to buy and start adding to it, half listening to the pair beside you. There is so much you want to write; you feel like you type non-stop for five minutes straight before you open up the web browser on your phone to see the price of the items you want. 

Things aren't as disgustingly expensive as you expected them to be, but you will still need to rearrange your budget a bit. You shouldn't need to dip into your savings if you put one or two things on your credit card, if your mental math is adding up. Of course, things might get more costly depending on quality - you are never one to skimp on that. 

You are going to have to do a lot more research. There is probably a forum somewhere that will give accurate reviews of products and you'll probably find things to buy you hadn't even thought of yet. 

You debate starting that search on your phone. At least until you notice Minnie is starting to tilt her head so she can rub her ear against her shoulder. You have told her she can't put her fingers in her ears after she managed to cut the inside of one with her nails and it got infected. This behavior is new, so you put your phone down and address it.

"Does your ear itch, Mouse?" You ask, thinking maybe her hair is tickling her or a bug got on her. 

"The boom-boom is too loud," she says with a pout, and you have no idea what she is talking about. The park is relatively quiet - no one is playing music and the river is clear of boats. But if your baby is saying something is too loud and it is hurting her ears, you are going to listen to her. She knows what she is experiencing, and you don't. You never want her to dismiss something that is hurting her.

Matt cocks his head to the side, his smile turning down into a frown, "The boom-boom? Which way is that coming from, sweetheart?"

Minnie, still holding onto Matt's hand, points towards the seating area by the river. There are a few people sitting there - but they are not making any sort of ruckus. 

It doesn't matter to you - you fish the pair of noise canceling headphones you always have on you out of your purse. You unfold them and gently put them over Minnie's ears. She squirms before finally letting go of Matt to fuss with their positioning. 

"Is that better, honey?" You ask, gently rubbing her back, hoping to give some comfort. She pushes at her eyes with the back of her hand before nodding. She takes a few moments to adjust then your little one turns and crawls her way into your lap, burying her face against your neck and hugging onto you. You wrap your arms around her, starting to rock in hopes it will make any lingering aches go away.

Matt is facing towards the direction Minnie said the loud noise was coming from, his brow wrinkled and openly scowling now. For someone with such a joyful smile, his unhappy face is a little terrifying. 

"I put her noise canceling headphones on," you tell Matt. He jerks to face you, his expression relaxing into something more concerned than angry. 

"Is she okay?" 

"She will be. She's crawled into my lap, and it takes her a few minutes to get used to the headphones. She might get a little fussy if whatever was bothering her is still going, but she'll be okay." You kiss your daughter's hair before looking back to Matt. "I don't know what triggers it or what she can hear that I can't, but the headphones help." 

"Does this happen often? Needing the headphones?" He asks and there is something in his voice that makes you feel like this is an important issue to him. His worry is almost tangible. You remember your phone call and his apprehension when you mentioned Minnie's sensitivities. It feels like you something you should review together when Minnie is preoccupied, and you can have more privacy. 

"Enough that I bring them with me when we go out. There's always sirens going off and if they are close, they hurt my ears, so I imagine they hurt hers." You rub your hand in a soothing motion over Minnie's back. She's leaning heavy into you, and you wonder if all her excitement has drained out of her after this upset. 

"Have you mentioned it to her doctor?" Matt asks, cautiousness in his voice like he's worried he's overstepping. You want to tell him he's allowed to ask these questions, but now is not the time.

"We did a hearing test, but they were only concerned if she couldn't hear, not if she was hearing too much. She hasn't gotten any ear deformities or any other medical problems with her ears, so they just sent us on our way, saying she'll grow out of it. She says the headphones help, but you can hear me just fine, can't you, Mouse?"

She nods against your neck, mumbling into your skin, "I don't like the doctor."

"I know, baby. I'm sorry." You give Matt a sad smile, "I think they are just too big for her. But she can play in them and hear me still, so I try to think of it as a plus?" 

"A plus?" He asks, brow scrunching up slightly. Again, he doesn't sound judgmental, only curious. 

You shrug, "I don't know, thinking of everything so negatively all the time is draining, so I just try to even out the pro-con list. Like, sometimes she'll wear them when we are here and I can go sit on the bench, but if I call out to her, she hears me. I can let her be a little independent, but she's still safe. I can be three feet away instead of right on top of her. When I wear my earphones, I can't hear anything at all. So, they help but don't block everything out? When she gets bigger, we can find ones that fit better. And she gets a cute little accessory and we get to make the little sleeves together. There are so many cute headphones, too..." 

You trail off, unsure where you are going with your little explanation. You aren't even sure it makes sense. Matt's still got a strange little frown on his face and you don't know if it's from how Minnie is acting or from how you are handling everything. You have to bite your lip to keep you from continuing on, rambling about how your daughter's sensitivities will never be a burden. 

Matt wets his lips with his tongue, and he starts to pick at the hem of his pants. It's a small insight to how he is feeling, and you don't know what to do, so you just keep rocking Minnie.

"After I lost my sight, I only had a few months with my dad," his voice is so soft, you can just barely hear him, but you are so focused on it. "It was hard on him, harder on him than it was me. He didn't know how to help me; he didn't know how to get the resources - not that a lot was available to us. But he tried, you know? He really did…and when I lost him, it felt like I lost that, too. I mean, the social workers and nuns were there, I wasn't neglected, but…it wasn't the same." He angles his head towards you, motioning to his ears. "And I know this isn't the same situation, a sense being sensitive versus losing one completely, but you being so in tune with her needs, it reminds me of my dad." 

You can't imagine how high of a praise that is and you feel yourself turning pink. Matt ducks his head, this shy little smile on his face like he knows how touched you are. 

"It is what she deserves," you mumble. You want to push past your own awkwardness, so you clear your throat and default to questions you already have in your mind. "Do…you want to do this again? Next Saturday?"

His head jerks up in surprise and a smile blooms across his face. "I would love that."

"Love that," is grumbled against your neck and right away you know Mouse is going to need her nap soon. Once she starts mimicking like this, it is only a matter of time before she is conked out and you rocking her is only luring her closer. 

Matt looks completely over the moon by the comment, and you dare to push just a little bit. "I was thinking…maybe we could make this a thing? Saturday lunches?"

Matt licks his lips then nods, his grin just getting bigger and bigger, "Yes, yeah. That would be…yeah." He seems a little overwhelmed by the thought, but in a good way. Like he didn't think it was a possibility. 

He rubs his hand over his mouth, then tilts his head so it appears he's looking down at the little girl half asleep in your lap, "I want that. I want…this. I want it to be official." He drops his hand, "You said we need to do a doctor's appointment. What would be after that?"

"They have over the counter ones now, but I think that would be best. Then…altering documentation and stuff, at least, officially and legally." You don't want to get into the discussion of rights and such at the moment and Matt seems to be on the same page. He's a lawyer, so it must be occurring to him. "I'll, um, contact the doctor and ask when we could come in."

Fingers brush against your thigh and you look down to see Matt offering out his hand. Hesitantly, not knowing what he wants, you take it. Gently, he squeezes your fingers, then starts running his thumb over your knuckles. 

"Thank you. For finding me. For this. For her. I thought God had showed me what my path should be, but I think I was foolish for thinking He was done with me just yet," Matt says, voice so soft and fond. "He was just preparing me for this."

The religious talk makes you flush - you don't remember if you've ever actually been in a church before - but it seems important to Matt, so you gently squeeze his fingers back, and as usual, say the first thought that crosses your mind. "I thank God for her every day. Somedays, I really do think she is Heaven sent." 

"Our gift from God."

You fall into a comfortable silence, you holding Mouse as she gets limper and limper against you, and Matt beside you, a little breeze blowing his hair a bit and somehow making him look ethereal. You have to tear your eyes away from him - even if he is blind and you are wearing sunglasses, it is rude to stare. Instead, you focus on the ducks.

They are still cleaning their feathers, but now one has started to quack occasionally. The ambient park noises are almost relaxing, and you find yourself thinking maybe, just maybe, all of this is going to be okay. Maybe, the world won't spiral out of control now that Matt is in your life. Maybe, you'll just keep having nice Saturdays at the park until Minnie decides it's too uncool to spend the day with her mom and dad and wants to hang out with her friends instead. 

But that won't come for a very long time. Right now, you'll sit holding hands with the man who changed your life forever and the little angel you have both been blessed with. 

a/n:

yes matt, god dropped a building on you to make you a better dad

tags:

@midnightreids @cloudroomblog @yeonalie @thychuvaluswife 

@dorothleah @mattmurdocksstarlight @mars-on-vinyl @mywellspringoflife @sleepdeprived-barelyalive @simmilarly @soupyspence @darkened-writer @akila-twt

@murc0ckmurc0ck @groovycass @sumo-b98 @just3rowsing @tongueofcat @zoom1374

@theclassicvinyldragon @aoi-targaryen @lunaticgurly @nikitawolfxo @shireentapestry @snakevyro @yondiii @echos-muses @honeybug-victoria @the-bisaster @ristare @mrs-bellingham @eugene-emt-roe @cometenthusiast @stevenknightmarc @hunnybelha @

Specialagentjackbauer @yarrystyleeza @ofmusesandsecrets @mayp11-blog@danzer8705 @thinking-at-dusk @remuslupinwifee @akila-twt

[laviefantasie]

When Emma Falls In Love…

Pairings: Gojo Satoru x Reader

Summary: If there was one thing Satoru was thankful for, it was you.

| Masterlist |

They say it is incredibly rare to find someone that cares about you without another agenda. One that wants to see you achieves your hopes and dreams. One that encourages you to grow and is right by your side throughout each and every mess. One who does not define love with an ‘if’ or a ‘because’, but with an ‘in spite for’ and an ‘even though’. One that is brave enough to love unconditionally, without ever expecting anything in return; one that just gives.

The world has approximately 8 billion people in it and yet, to love or be loved unconditionally is a once in a blue moon occurrence.

Y/L/N Y/N knew this.

She has always known that love is a serendipity. Something fortuitous. She has always known that it is the greatest curse of all; that loving is giving the other person a gun and have them point it at you, allowing them to decide if you live or die.

Yet, she has also always known that everything that can be considered a curse can be considered a blessing, all depends on the point of view.

So, Y/N has never closed herself off to the idea of love. But she has never looked for it either.

To be honest, even if she wanted to look for it (which she doesn’t) she wouldn’t have the opportunity (nor the choice) to do so. Not when she was a Jujutsu Sorcerer from the Y/L/N clan. Not when she was the heiress of said clan.

She didn’t have choices when it came to trivial things like love. She was set to marry as soon as she graduates to start producing another heir, to make sure to pass her family’s curse technique. She had always known this. She had always been taught about it.

So… why was this happening now?

Why was she ignoring Yaga-sensei’s lesson to stare at her white-haired doofus childhood friend/classmate?

And why was her heart beating so loud?

A paper ball hits the back of her head, startling her. Turning in her seat, Y/N meets the nonchalant eyes of her best friend, Ieiri Shoko. Said girl gestures with her eyes to the paper on the floor, so with a fleeting glance at her teacher Y/N bends to pick it up.

[ Why are you staring at Tweedledee over there? ]

Y/N winces slightly as soon as she reads the message. Hurrying to hide it in her notebook, even if there was no one close enough to read it.

Damn Shoko and her intuition.

Deciding to ignore her best friend, Y/N stares straight ahead at her teacher. Physically restraining herself every single time her eyes dared to try to gaze at her white-haired friend.

When class finally ends, Y/N tries to pick her stuff up as soon as possible, hoping to be able to outrun her curious best friend.

But, of course, she was naive for thinking she could.

“Someone’s in a hurry” Shoko’s unbothered sweet voice states from her side, “Wonder why”

Y/N closed her eyes in defeat before opening them to look at the amused eyes of her best friend.

“Now, will you answer my—?”

“Y/N!”

The loud and excited voice of the boy Y/N had spend most of the class staring at startled them both. And soon they are joined by their two other classmates.

The problematic duo. The strongest boys: Tweedledum and Tweedledee, known also as Geto Suguru and Gojo Satoru.

The white-haired beauty rests his arm on Y/N’s shoulder as soon as he comes to her side, Geto mimicking his actions with Shoko. Both of them smirking.

“What are you girls whispering about?” Satoru asks with amusement, “Is it about me?”

Shoko scoffs, “In your dreams”

“How’d you know?”

Geto rolls his eyes, “Ignore him. We wanted to ask you both if you wanted to go to Tokyo, there’s this cafe we want to try”

“Sure” Y/N nods, “We should ask Nanami and Haibara if they want to join us”

Satoru groans loudly as soon as the words leave her mouth, and pushes most of his body weight onto her, making her almost lose her balance.

“I refuse”

Suguru lets out a big laugh after his best friend’s words while Shoko only looks totally amused, as if she had already expected that.

Y/N, on the other hand, looks at Satoru with a frown.

“You refuse? Why would you refuse?”

“Because”

“What do you mean ‘because’?”

“Because”

Y/N narrows her eyes before looking at her other friends for answers, but both of them just smile at her, totally amused by the scene happening in front of them.

“One reason. Give me one reason and I’ll agree”

Satoru shrugs his shoulders, “I don’t like sharing”

“Huh?”

Satoru doesn’t wait for her to try to decipher his statement, instead he grabs her bag before pushing her so she starts walking.

“You said to give you a reason, there it is” he pushes her once more “Now, move”

She does as told, even when her mind still works to try to understand what he said. Either way, as soon as they are all out of their school’s barrier said statement is forgotten. After-all, Satoru had always said vague things like that to her ever since they met, nothing worth frying her brain for.

Okay, something was really wrong with her. Not only had she spent all of last month staring at Gojo Satoru every single day whenever he was close, but now she was glaring at said boy while he flirted with a non-sorcerer.

Why the hell was she glaring? Why was she even looking at them? Satoru flirting wasn’t a new occurrence, on the contrary, it was a daily event. For Satoru flirting was as natural and as necessary as breathing, so why was she so bothered by it right now? It’s not as if she had never witnessed it before, so why did it mattered now?

Why was her chest aching so annoyingly? Why did she feel so nauseous when she had barely touched her food? Why couldn’t she drift her gaze away from them?

Y/N clenched her hands shut, forcing herself to look at her food. Why was it so hard to do something as simple as that? Why did her chest hurt enough that she had to remind herself to do something as natural as breathing?

“Not hungry?”

She moves her gaze from her food to the reason behind her inner turmoil who had finally seemed to remember he came here with her, not with the pretty blonde non-sorcerer he was just speaking to.

“Uh…” she fleetingly looks at her untouched full plate, “Not really”

Satoru frowns, “Do you feel okay?”

Breathe in. Breathe out, she reminds herself.

Why was it that she suddenly felt like crying? Was it because he was looking at her with such sincere worry? Or was it because he had lowered his round sunglasses to really look at her with those mesmerizing blue eyes so he could make sure she was okay?

What was wrong with her?

"Uh—I…Jus—Can we go back?" she stammers, "I don't feel really good"

Satoru’s frown deepens, but he nods and soon both of them are making their way back to their school. In complete silence.

As soon as Y/N makes it back to the security of her dorm, she doesn’t waste a single second. She hurries to lock her door and to close her blinds, grabbing her phone as fast as possibly and dialing her mother’s number.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

She needed answers or she would lose her mind, and the only person who she knew could give her those was the one she trusted the most: her mom.

“Honey?” She hears her mom’s sweet and soft voice as she answers, “You good? You never call”

“I…”

Breathe in. Breathe out.

“Something is wrong” she whispers.

“What’s going on?”

What was going on? That was a hard question. And so she explained, as best as she could. And her mom listened, silently and patiently. Never interrupting her, even when she was stammering and rambling all over the place.

As the words leave her lips in hurried whispers, her feet pace around her room anxiously.

“Oh, honey”

Maybe it was the understanding in her mother’s voice or maybe the softness in her pet name, but it was then that she understood.

“I’m not in love”

But, oh, how ironic. It was the moment the words left her mouth, the moment she tried to convince her mom (or maybe herself) of it, that she understood it.

She was in love with one of her best friends.

Her feet stop pacing. Her heart stops beating. Her breath slows down and her knees tremble. All adrenaline leaving her abruptly.

She has to force herself to move to her bed so she can sit before her body gives up on her.

“Oh” she whispers, “Oh”

“Yeah, oh” her mom responds, “So, the one blessed with the six eyes?”

“Satoru” she whispers as a reflex, used to having to remind a lot of sorcerers around them that Satoru is more than just that.

“Satoru” her mom repeats, “What is he like now? I haven’t seen him in a long time”

“Uh, well… he is something else, definitely” she whispers softly, “He is kind and loyal. Also funny. Although, he has a huge ego… uh, he—kinda a womanizer”

Breathe in. Breathe out.

“He is a womanizer” she repeats, as if reminding herself, “Never one to settle down. Gets bored pretty easily of people. Things he’s above all that—romance, I mean. He’s not really serious about anything, so commitment is out of the question. Doesn’t really trust people with his feelings, so that’d be a problem, right? And—”

“Honey,” her mom interrupts, “sounds like you’re trying to convince yourself about how this could end up going wrong without even trying first”

Huh.

So that’s what she’s doing.

Everything changed after the call with her mom. Everything changed once she finally understood what was truly going on with her. How could it not when she was never one to hide her feelings? Always wearing her heart on her sleeve, never knowing how to hide the light in her e/c eyes.

Everyone noticed and she constantly scolded herself for it. Yet, she couldn’t help it.

She couldn’t stop herself from looking at Satoru as if he hung in the air like the stars in outer space, brighter than the moon itself. She couldn’t stop herself from smiling every time their eyes met nor the way her eyes lit up.

But just as she couldn’t stop herself from expressing how she felt, Satoru couldn’t force himself to reciprocate her feelings.

Satoru had never been one to believe in love. He, as she did, believed love to be the worst curse of them all. But, contrary to her belief, he could never even think of the possibility of it being a blessing. So, even when his attitude towards her never change, there was this new wall built between them that kept her far enough to never reach his heart.

She didn’t need to confess for him to know her feelings.

He didn’t need to reject her for her to know his.

They had always been close, since the moment they met when they were six. They had always understood each other without the need to explain themselves, and maybe it was because of the way their cursed techniques were interlaced but it didn’t matter to them.

Both always knew where the other stood.

Y/N knew Satoru wasn’t ready for the love she felt for him. Didn’t even know if he’d ever be ready for it. But she had no intention of falling in love with anyone else, at least not at the moment. So, whenever he’s ready, she’d be there.

He was her first love. He had forever changed her and she knew no matter how hard she tried, that wouldn’t go away.

So, for now, she was content with how little he gave her. She was content with how careful he was with her feelings even when he had no intention of reciprocating them.

So, when did everything change?

There were only four known special grade sorcerers so far in Japan: Tsukumo Yuki, Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru, and Y/L/N Y/N. Although Tsukumo is not associated with Jujutsu High, so the only sorcerers that Yaga would entrust a mission as important as the one of the Star Plasma Vessel are the three special grades in his care.

“Escort the vessel and erase her?” Satoru asks.

Geto and Y/N share a look before focusing once again on their teacher, who confirms the mission. Not even a second later, Suguru and Satoru start whispering about Yaga losing his mind making the only girl present roll her eyes.

By the end of the conversation, the three best friends were on babysitting duty of the girl meant to reset master Tengen’s cursed technique.

Y/N receives her cold black tea from Satoru’s hands before they start making their way once again to the location of the Star Plasma Vessel, all while Suguru tries to answer each of Satoru’s questions.

“Anyways, it should be okay” Satoru shrugs, “We’re the strongest”

Y/N scoffs a laugh, while Suguru sighs and tries to explain to Satoru how he should start dialing down his narcissistic tendencies.

“Sheesh, give me a break” Satoru groans, “Y/N likes me the way I am, right?”

Her eyes widen and a blush soon makes home in her cheeks, making her turn her face away from him to avoid his amused smile.

“Uh—I…”

An explosion saves her from answering, although she isn’t sure she’d rather deal with that. Maybe that’s when everything started truly going downhill.

It didn’t take long for the three of them to take action and defeat the Q workers, saving the girl they learned was Amanai Riko. The young girl was a firecracker that had made Y/N laugh after she slapped Satoru and insulted Suguru. Maybe things would’ve been better if she hadn’t been so innocent and likable; if she hadn’t been so young and pure.

But things hadn’t been better. Honestly, things couldn’t have gone more wrong.

She wishes they’d stayed in Okinawa. All of them had been so at peace there. All of them had so much fun. They had gone to the beach after rescuing Amanai’s caretaker, where Satoru had run to the water with Y/N on his grasps while ignoring her screams. They had eaten and joked around before going to the aquarium.

Maybe she should’ve stopped Satoru from staying awake that night, maybe she should’ve made him rest for some time instead of deciding to make him company before falling asleep on his shoulder. Maybe then things would’ve been different.

But Y/N had done none of that and now she was staring at the consequences.

Satoru was just stabbed in front of her, just after they crossed the barrier around Jujutsu High that protected them.

Y/N had never wanted more to fully dominate her cursed technique. Never had she ever wanted to understand the depth behind the intricate time manipulation cursed technique her family possessed that made them the Gojo clan’s greatest ally. She possessed one of the most powerful known cursed techniques, one that could make her an equal to Satoru, yet she had never truly bothered with anything below the surface.

Not even when her father had explained to her the greatness she was destined to achieve. Not when, like Satoru, her birth had change the world.

She had never wanted to be exceptional, she had always just wanted to be strong enough to protect those she loved. Acquiring her cursed techniques full depth came with a great sacrifice. One she had never been willing to pay.

But now?

Now she’d pay the price without a second thought. What did it matter if she’d have to suffer through the pain of her eyes bleeding until her irises and pupils turned completely white? What did it matter if her lifetime shall shorten with every time she fooled destiny? What would it matter if she’d have to live with the possibility of losing her mind at any moment, never distinguishing the difference between the past, the present or the future again?

She would do it. She would do it without a second thought if that meant not staring at Satoru in the eyes as he orders her to follow Suguru, to leave him behind, as he bleeds.

She shakes her head.

She wasn’t leaving him, not with whoever that man was. She could feel he was dangerous, she didn’t know how she knew it but she did.

Y/N would never forgive herself if she left him behind.

“You have to trust me, Y/N” Satoru’s smile softens, “Trust me”

She shouldn’t have turned around, but she did. She trusted him with her life, so she had to trust him with his own.

She’d never trust him like that again.

Blood flows from her mouth as she lays face down on the floor, wounds all over her body as Fushiguro Toji stares down at her.

“So this is the Y/L/N pride” he murmurs, “Aren’t you supposed to be strong? The Gojo’s Six Eyes biggest ally or something like that? That’s the story, isn’t it? The space and time techniques are supposed to coexist with one another according to the legend of the Six Eyes and the Blind One, am I wrong?”

Y/N coughs out blood, her gaze blurring.

“At least he put up a fight” he scoffs, “You were doing so well until I told you I killed him”

She flinched at the reminder, making him scoff once again.

“The Blind One that sees all” he scoffs in disbelief, “What a joke. Let’s end this here, agree?”

He stabs her once more, forcing her to cough out even more blood before forcing the blade to go from her lower back to the back of her neck.

“You’re no threat with how little control you have over your cursed technique” he murmurs, “but waiting for you to become one is not an option. It was to meet you, let’s never do this again”

She tried to stay awake, tried to remember everything Shoko had ever taught her about reverse cursed technique, but her mind was too out of it to form any coherent thought. Maybe that was how she was meant to die, after all her life had always been intertwined in a way with Satoru’s, so if he was gone what was the point of her being there at all?

Her eyes closed, yet she kept breathing.

Her mind was fuzzy, yet like a mantra the names of every single person she loved repeated themselves over and over again.

That’s when she felt it happen.

Her eyes open wide and a painful scream, strong enough to tear her vocal cords, left her body. Blood started pouring out of her eyes as the e/c and black in them starts being burnt away as if the water in her eyelids was acid.

She had never felt pain like this. It felt as if her eyes were being stabbed by a hundred needles over and over again. And when it finally stopped, and her body started healing herself once again, she understood every word her father had ever uttered to her about their powerful cursed technique.

So this is what it means to be blessed and cursed. To give more time as you lose your own. She had felt herself dying, yet her own cursed technique sent her body back in time, to when she hadn’t yet been hurt. Even as hours of her future self were taken from her for cheating death, she could still see it. It was crystal clear in her mind, as if it was a scene she had seen in a movie.

So that’s what her father meant when he told her she could lose herself to the past, the present, the future, and all its endless possibilities?

That was meant to be her world from now on.

“Y/N”

She blinks once. Twice. Thrice. Before pushing herself to a kneeling position so she could move her gaze to the source. It wasn’t real, it couldn’t be.

Yet it was. She knew it. It wasn’t one of the possibilities on the multiverses she could see.

Even with her eyesight lost, she could sense his cursed technique. He could visualize him by the way his cursed technique lit up his body shape.

He was here. He was alive.

“Stand up” he tells her, “ Amanai is dead. We failed”

Her knees tremble as she forces herself to stand. How could he be so calm? How could his voice sound so devoid of emotion? She wishes she could truly see him, she always used to know what he was feeling with just one look.

Things were gonna be different now.

It started with little changes. First, Y/N had to return to her clan immediately to train her technique. She had to learn to control what she saw before frying her brain. She had to also learn to dominate reverse curse technique.

She wasn’t just a normal time cursed user like the rest of her clan, it wasn’t just freezing or slowing your opponent anymore. A touch from her could now age, could kill. A touch from her could now rebirth, could save.

She was now a weapon. A shield. More importantly, she was the strongest right hand. Space and time always cohabiting with each other.

When she finally came back to school, everything had already changed too much and she couldn’t even bother herself with adapting to the changes, too trouble by the different dreams of the different future outcomes. Of all the choices that hadn’t yet been made but could be, of all their consequences.

She didn’t remember the last time she had spent some time with her best friends, the only person she spent time with lately being Satoru. Satoru, who for some reason she didn’t bother to analyze, always seek her when he finally had time off from a mission. Never leaving her side unless he really had to.

All of them had forever been changed after their failed mission. So, when was it enough?

She hadn’t been there to see Suguru slowly start to lose himself, too focused on Satoru and herself to notice the little clues laid in front of her of the future she had seen yet refused to believed.

Then, she had seen Haibara’s dead body.

She tried to stop it then. Hoping, wishing, it wasn’t too late. She had run to him that night, meeting him on the courtyard of their school as he smoked the night away.

“Please don’t”

He didn’t look at her. Barely inhaled a smoke before letting his gaze fall from the moon, as if its light was too much for him.

“I don’t know what you’ve seen, but I’m not planning anything”

“I know you’re not” she whispers “but I also know what you’ll see. Please don’t leave us behind”

His dark saddened eyes turn to look at her, really look at her and her breath hitches. One of the things she loathes about being able to see the past is the new perspectives she has of those around her. She had always been living her life as the Earth, always rotating around her sun. Never bothering to look at the moon, that always rotated around her.

Satoru was her sun, but Suguru had quietly always been her moon. And she had never once noticed before.

While she was too busy staring lovestruck at Satoru, Suguru had stared at her. But he had always been selfless, and he has always been happy with just gazing from afar, just like she was always happy only staring at Satoru.

This new depth in her technique made it painfully obvious for her the softness in which he gazed at her, even with all the sadness and conflict he carried in them he could still gaze at her with that particular softness. It made her heart ache.

“I would never leave you behind”

It sounded like a promise to anybody else, but to her it was like a blade to her heart. It was one more step to the future she so wanted to avoid.

She sat by his side that night, giving him the comfort of her presence.

On September, he went on the mission to exorcise a spirit to blame for the mysterious deaths and disappearances on a village.

That day he killed 112 villagers. On that day, he was sentenced to execution on sight as a curse user.

She was the first one to arrive when Shoko called, and the smile he gave her was all she needed to confirm her greatest fear. Her heart bled once she saw the soften in his gaze as he saw her, never wavering.

“I’m sorry I have to leave you behind” he whispered once they were far enough from Shoko, “I don’t want to, but I know you won’t follow me”

“We can fix this. I can fix this”

She could. She had the power to. She would do it if he asked, even if it cost her half of her lifetime.

“I don’t want you to” he whispered softly, “I want you to live a long and full life, not to sacrifice it for my own choices”

“You promised…”

“I know, that’s my only regret” he smiled, “You look beautiful. You are beautiful, I’m sorry I never said it before”

“Suguru…”

Both of them stopped as soon as they felt the curse energy of the only one missing from their group.

“Explain yourself, Suguru”

His smile faltered. He looked at her one last time, softly and full of adoration.

“Don’t let him hurt you” he whispered, “Thank you for everything”

And then, Suguru turned around to face his best friend before leaving them all behind. Before leaving everything he once believed in behind.

“What are you doing here?”

It was around 2 am when a knock on your door had woken you up, the last thing you had expected was to see Satoru’s aura on the other side. Since Suguru’s departure your best friend had started going to even more missions then before, making it impossible for you to actually see him for more than a few minutes.

You hadn’t really expected to see him soon, much less at the current time.

“May I come in?”

His tone is low, with no hint of a joke in it, which makes you open your door wide enough for him to cross without hesitating in the slightest.

Honestly, he could ask anything from you and you’d give it to him. No questions asked.

She feels him move to the middle of her room as she closes the door, his feet drawing circles on the floor showing the anxiety he must be feeling.

“I didn’t know you were back”

“I just came” he murmurs, “I’m sorry for barging in, I just—I needed to see you”

Y/N’s breath hitches and her heart throbs loudly in her chest. It was weird, the feeling of drowning that she had become so familiar with was slowly disappearing, as if just the sound of his voice was enough to remind her how to swim. Enough to help her breathe again.

She had been alone all this time. Shoko had been dealing with the abandonment in her own way by herself, only coming to her when the loneliness became too much. When that happened, Y/N had to ignore her own broken pieces to help hold those of her best friend. And once she was sure Shoko was well enough to go back to her own cave, she was left alone to take on both of their pain to bear it all by herself.

She wasn’t one to walk away, not unless she absolutely had to leave. But all she had needed all this time was to hear Satoru’s voice to remember the strength she possessed.

“You wanna lay down?”

He sees his aura move towards her bed, making her know he agreed to her suggestion.

With a deep breath, Y/N moves to join him. It wasn’t the first time they had ever slept on the same bed, they had tons of sleepovers as kids.

But this was different. They were older and wiser. They knew pain firsthand now. They also knew what the other really meant to one another, and how precious each moment together truly was. How ephemeral everything could be.

So as Satoru pulled her closer to him as he hugged her from behind, both of them felt the tension they had been carrying leave their bodies.

After so long, Satoru finally felt at peace once again. The void that had been his heart all this time felt completed. He could finally breathe without feeling something pushing against his chest.

That was the first time in a while he truly slept.

There truly was no reason for Y/N to love him, so Satoru didn’t understand how he had gotten so lucky. After Haibara’s death and Suguru’s betrayal, after Nanami’s abandonment, Satoru truly didn’t think he was someone worth staying for.

But Y/N never once left his side. Never even thought about it. It didn’t matter that she had spent ten years loving him without even a glimpse of him reciprocating said feelings, she had stayed.

He loved her, he truly did. He just didn’t know what being in love meant or felt like, so he couldn’t say he was in love with her. All he knew, as he stared at her right now while she said her goodbye to Yuta, was that knowing her had changed his whole world.

He had once asked her a few years back why she loved him. She had stayed quiet for a few minutes before finally answering in her soft voice that she reserved just for him.

“You just know. There doesn’t have to be a particular reason. I don’t think you need a reason to love someone, your heart chooses them before your mind even has a say. It’s something you can’t really control, it just takes over you. It hits you when you least expect it. You feel alive, you feel better; I don’t think it’s something anybody will truly understand, and they don’t have to. It’s not something meant to be understood by others, only by your heart”

He hadn’t said anything after her. Hadn’t even smiled or nodded. All he had done was stare at her and repeat every single word in his mind over and over again, until they had been engraved in his memory.

Those words were repeated like a mantra whenever he needed something to give him hope, something to fight for.

Those words along with the memories of the hundreds of nights they looked for refugee in each other’s arms were the inhaler that helped him breathe. He had never truly known what a real home felt like until she had held him with so much care, care he hadn’t ever truly known; care that made him feel like a kid needing to be cared for instead of the strongest everybody expected him to be.

He was grateful for her. For every time she made him feel loved and appreciated. For every moment she stared at him as if he was the moon and the stars and the whole galaxy. For helping him raise Tsumiki and Megumi without ever complaining about it. For helping him mend his broken heart even when the broken pieces scarred her hands until they bled.

He didn’t know if he was in love with her, he just knew that he did love her with all his heart and soul.

And as she finally started walking towards him after letting go of Yuta, with her bright smile that made her whitened eyes crinkle, it finally hit him. She was the person he wanted to come home to every night. The person he wants to tell about his day. The person to share his happiness, his sadness, his success and his failures with.

Everything was better with her. Everything had been better since her, because of her.

She who had loved the parts of him that were not easy to love. For turning the pages in his book gently, and helping him rewrite a happy ending to his tragic narrative.

Y/N was like a book the you couldn’t put down once you pick it up. The kind of girl that would make every bad boy turn good. A shelter for his heart when it rained. A breath of fresh air whenever he felt like drowning.

She was everything and so much more and he truly didn’t know how to tell her. He was never good at expressing how he felt, he was of an acts of service guy. So how could he show you how much you truly meant to him? How much he really needed you? How much he loved you?

“…ru. Satoru. Satoru!” His gaze snaps towards you, seeing you look at him with amusement, “I’ve been calling you nonstop. A penny for your thoughts?”

Don’t ever stop smiling at me. Don’t ever stop looking at me. Don’t ever leave me.

“Ready to go home?”

He can see the confused frown on her face, but her smile is never wiped and that gives him hope of her understanding the underlying message on his words.

Home was wherever she was. So wherever she went, he would follow. He wanted to go home with her, because he wanted to hold her and never let her go. He wanted to be the reason for her smiles and the ones she chose to share her laughs with.

He wanted everything.

“Let’s go home, ‘toru”

He may have been cursed since birth, but it was all worth it if he had you.

[[ Really not my best work but my first Gojo One-Shot. Hope you all like it! I’m open to requests. Thank you for reading!!]]

[loviatarsluv]

chapter ii. cracked ceilings

pairing: Gale x f!tav (my own oc, Elara)

(takes place mostly after the events of the game with some flashbacks sprinkled throughout)

rating: mature

CW: strong language, slight se*ual harassment (just a drunken oaf making nasty comments), blood/injury, light violence, angst

in summary: After the fall of the brain, and her home having been destroyed in the chaos, Gale offers Elara sanctuary with him back in Waterdeep. She struggles to deal with the feelings she has been harboring for him and the guilt that she’d been the one to prevent either of them from taking the relationship any further a few months prior. Yearning and pining ensues

a/n: thank you to those who were so sweet about the first chapter, it really means so much to me 🥹 i hope you enjoy this one just as much ♡︎

word count: 6.8k

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ii.

She had finally begun to understand why they called Waterdeep ‘the city of splendors’. 

Since coming to stay with Gale, Elara hadn’t left the tower much. A part of her feared running into any further trouble when she’d just experienced more chaos and turmoil than most would in their entire lives, especially now being known as The Hero of Baldur’s Gate. Despite being here rather than back home, she knew word had likely spread as far as Neverwinter by now. 

Gale had been incredibly patient with her, despite his desire to show her around his beloved city. She was boundlessly grateful for that fact despite her guilt for becoming a hermit when he was likely just happy to be home and wanted to enjoy it in its entirety.

She would tell him not to hold back on her account and to do all that he desired with his newfound freedom from the fear of the orb within himself, and that she would be fine right where she was. But she could see in his eyes that he wanted company. Her company. 

So, this time, she relented. A simple trip to the market surely couldn’t hurt, right? 

She caught the end of a familiar tune as she approached the large open window in her bedroom— a song that she remembered her mother humming absently throughout the day, and then singing to her before bed. One of the last vivid memories she had left of her. 

Elara hoped maybe they would pass the bard on their way to the market so she could toss them a few gold pieces. 

She gazed out over the expanse of the ocean and hummed along to the song until its eventual end, smiling somberly to herself. 

She glanced at herself in the mirror and tried to remember her mother’s face— tried to imagine her own face, just older, but with bright blue eyes rather than dull brown, her hair long, pin straight and black instead of untamable, wavy, and garishly bright. 

No. If there was one thing she recalled about her mother, it was that she had the sort of beauty that words couldn’t describe. The kind that scribes and bards scribbled poetry about and sang ridiculous ballads for. 

A far cry from how she viewed herself, certainly. 

Her long azure waves flowed down her back, partially braided back near the crown of her head to keep some of it out of her eyes. Shadowheart had taught her a few hairstyles to manage and tame her hair, but most of the time she just couldn’t be arsed to put in the effort. 

She dusted off some of the robes Astarion ‘purchased’ for her while they were in the Lower City, muttering something about how she desperately needed a wardrobe change. A gift wrapped in a backhanded remark, as could always be expected of Astarion. She smiles at the memory, now suddenly missing him and all of his mischief and hoping he was doing well. 

Perhaps she could pay them a visit soon. 

The robes were rather lovely— a deep cerulean mixed with accented gold metal clasps and brown leather, the length of it just right so that it doesn’t drag the floor. It suited her well. Astarion really did have a good eye, unsurprisingly. Perhaps in another life he was a tailor. 

She takes one last long look at herself in the mirror, the anxiety evident in her eyes as well as the dark circles under them. She’d barely gotten a wink of rest as her mind turned over every possibility of what could happen the moment she steps foot outside of this tower. 

Nothing that made any sense or seemed feasible— but then again, a year ago, the thought of a mindflayer invasion seemed like a fever dream. 

Now was not the time for what if’s. All would be well. She would have a nice outing with her good friend. 

Great friend.

Friend.

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Gale had mastered the art of keeping himself occupied. 

He somehow always had something he could be working on or a book he could be reading or a subject he could study further, especially in times when his mind required redirection.

Or distraction, rather.

Spending an entire year in solitude with only yourself, your books, and four walls to keep you company teaches you many things about yourself. 

Spending months surrounded by who very likely could be the love of your life without the ability to act on that feeling also teaches you many things about yourself. 

There had been many days spent holed up in his library, trying all that he could to keep his mind of anything other than her and her eyes (one a deep, rich brown and the other a much lighter, honey-like shade) and her dazzling smile that made him feel like if the orb were still present in his chest, he would be at risk of implosion just at the sight of it. 

Now, to have a proper outing that would finally be just the two of them after months of dropping hints— he was feeling quite restless. 

So much so, that he basically leaps to his feet at the sound of her footsteps bounding down the stairs, standing quickly and straightening his clothes before she appears from the staircase, adjusting himself and ensuring nothing was askew or out of place. He smooths his hair, tucking a strand behind his ear and adjusts his sleeves just before she emerges, his heart skipping a beat as he sees her.  

He had to remind himself many times that this excursion was nothing more than a quick trip to the market— but it did little to quell the sweat beads rising in his palm and the buzzing in his stomach. 

He hadn’t spent a lot of time with her that felt like they were both choosing each other’s company. It almost always felt like they just happened to end up in the same room as each other by chance, or if they did, it was merely to complete a task. To do research, to eat breakfast or dinner, to exchange notes.

If it were up to him, he would remain at her side every moment that her eyes were open and if he were allowed, even those when they were closed. 

He was only waiting for the right moment, or any sort of notion that she had perhaps changed her mind— then, he would— well, do something.

Uncharacteristically enough for him, he hadn’t really thought that far yet. 

Now may be an apt time to start, though.

“Sorry I took so long, I had to make sure I had everything so we can stock up and last us a little longer.” She says with a huff, gesturing to the two wicker baskets draped over her arms. 

He stares at her for longer than was necessary, mouth slightly agape as he took in the sight of her. It wasn’t unusual for her to look anything short of breathtaking, but this had been the most put together he’d seen her since bringing her back to Waterdeep. She looked—

“Radiant,” he mutters, not realizing the word hadn’t remained only in his mind. 

She smirks at him awkwardly, looking down at herself. “What did you say?” 

He shakes his head, clearing his throat. “I said— I just meant— you look lovely today.” 

She chuckles, averting her gaze sheepishly. “Funny.” 

“Not at all. I meant it, Elara. You look… you are radiant.” He says, his voice low and reverent, as if he were admiring a painting hung in a gallery. 

A blush rises to her cheeks as she tries to fight off what would probably have been the widest she’d ever smiled in her life. “Oh… well, thank you, Gale. You look… dashing. As always.” She replies, the dimples in her cheeks visible as she grins shyly. 

“Why, thank you, my lady,” he says with a bow, then holds his hand out as an invitation for hers. She timidly places her hand in his, and he presses a gentle kiss to her knuckles. “Shall we?” 

She’s taken aback by the gesture, her already intense blush only becoming ever more prominent and persistent, the heat in her cheeks beginning to feel as though she may burn up before they even make it outside. 

She nods slowly, then follows his lead out the door, her hand lingering in his until they reach the front door steps. She takes a few steps ahead of him and attempts to steady her breathing, as he quickly casts Arcane Lock on the door before rejoining her.

Everything seemed to come alive with a brand new vigor— the streets were full again, the sounds of children running and playing as well as the Waterdhavian locals just existing and enjoying the sunshine for the first time in months echoed off the sides of the stone buildings that lined the streets. The faint melodic strumming of a lyre could be heard not too far from the Dekarios residence, as a bard occupied a spot just outside one of the nearby taverns and busked for coins throughout the day. 

They walk side by side in silence for a little while, both of them happily drinking in the sights surrounding them. Gale points out places and bits of interest as they walk, telling her stories of his life growing up on these very streets. 

She listens to him, but her mind fills any empty gaps with his voice echoing in her mind again and again. 

You are radiant. 

Gale was not averse to a bit of flattery, it wasn’t an uncommon behavior for him to compliment her or offer her or anyone else a kind word when it seemed they needed it, and even times when they didn’t.

But something about the phrasing of it struck her. Almost in a way that nearly made her believe it. If Gale Dekarios thought she was radiant, then by the gods, she must be. 

No one had ever seemed to look at her twice before in her life— none had ever seen her in that light or verbalized such a thing to her before. Not like that.

But Gale— gods, she’d write it in the stars if she could. She would paint the night sky with each syllable in only the most dazzling of stars, the brightest she could find— so that every night she could remember the way it sounded dripping from his tongue like honey. 

A single word had never filled her entire body with a warmth that the sun’s rays could never provide.

Radiant.

“I’m not sure if I’ve asked you yet, but how have you enjoyed Waterdeep thus far? Despite not having seen much of it yet,” He asks, slowing his pace slightly to accommodate her, her legs being shorter than his so her shorter strides made her fall behind. 

He had asked, a few times. But that was months ago when it was all still new. Plus— her answer had changed considerably since the last time he asked. 

“Hush, you,” She pushes his shoulder playfully, a soft melodic giggle following. Gale’s heart flutters. 

“Not to worry. We are remedying that from this day forward. By the time we’re done, you’ll never want to go back to Baldur’s Gate, I guarantee it.” He says proudly, a dash of hope in his eyes as he does. 

“I don’t know. Does Waterdeep get invaded by tentacled monsters and completely ravaged by cultists and corrupt politicians and their armies regularly? Might not be my speed,” she teases. 

“It is not without its strange happenings, I can assure you. Nothing quite so severe, I am regretful to say.” 

“A shame.” 

They smile at each other for the length of the lull in conversation, their banter bringing memories of their adventuring days back to the forefront. The gleam in Gale’s eye causes her to look away as if she’d looked at the sun for too long. 

After a beat, Gale continues. “But, there is nothing quite like witnessing the changing of the seasons in Waterdeep. I’m happy to provide that experience for you, at long last.” He replies, punctuating it with a wink. 

She rolls her eyes and bumps her shoulder to his, averting her gaze to the cobblestone beneath her feet as they continue to walk. “Thank you, for that, by the way. For… letting me stay with you. I know it’s not ideal. I’m sure you would’ve liked to enjoy some peace and quiet in your home after everything… and I don’t know if I have properly thanked you for allowing me to stay with you, so,” she rambles, the heat in her cheeks only increasing. 

He places a soothing hand on her arm, his fingertips featherlight as he slowly runs them along the length of her bicep before returning to his side. 

“After a year of complete solitude outside of my cat and hundreds of books whose pages I am all too familiar with, your company is more than wonderful and most welcome. No thanks necessary.” 

When she meets his eyes, the warm and mirthful smile that greets her nearly turns her legs to jelly, but she would happily melt under the sunshine that was his gaze. 

Before she can attempt to craft a response to him, a commotion is heard ahead, and both of their attention snaps to it.

A crowd has begun to form near the front of the nearby tavern, and not a single intelligible word could be made out of the raucous whooping within the crowd of presumably day drunk patrons and bystanders craning their necks to watch whatever was taking place at the center of it. She furrows her brows, shooting Gale an inquisitive glance.

She watches closely for a moment before she feels Gale’s guiding hand on her back, urging her to go in a different direction, any other direction. 

“Come, let’s push on. There is no shortage of drunken tomfoolery around here, it’s nothing to concern ourselves with. Besides, Tara will be waiting for us, and trust me when I say she is not the most pleasant when she’s been kept waiting,” he says, his voice low next to her ear. It was a throwaway excuse to pull her away from the ruckus and to safety to avoid potentially getting swept into a hysteria she needn’t get swept into. 

If her mind hadn’t been so preoccupied by whatever was happening in front of them, she’d have been blushing furiously at the position of his hand, just above the small of her back. Something to try not to think too much about later. 

Her eyes flick to him for an instant before she hears what sounded like a lyre being smashed against the side of the bricked building. Her head snaps in that direction, and the crowd parts in just the right way for her to see a young tiefling crumpled to the ground with his face in his hands, and an older human man above mocking him, gripping part of the smashed instrument in one of his fists. 

Her face twists to a deep grimace, and before she can stop herself her feet are carrying her forward, her pace quickening. Gale calls to her from behind, his voice distant and nearly inaudible over the loud pounding and drumming of her heart in her ears. 

The crowd has begun to disperse only slightly, but a handful of people still linger and are either cheering on the older man or encouraging the tiefling to stand and fight. The tiefling’s shoulders shake and tremble as he cowers away from the inebriated brute towering over him bellowing nonsense.

The man stands above what she can now see is merely a child, no older than thirteen, shouting taunts of profanity and cruelty that she tries her hardest to disregard before the lightning crackling in her palm can (very easily) send him onto his ass. 

She calms herself as she shoves her way through the crowd, taking a breath before she approaches the child and kneels before him.

“Hello,” she says, her voice soft so as to not startle him. She places a gentle hand on his arm, coaxing him into looking up at her. “Are you okay?” 

Before he can respond, the booming of the perpetrator’s slurred mockery echoing throughout the small alleyway interrupts them both. 

“Oi, missy! Careful, the little foulblood’ll snatch yer coin purse when ye ain’t lookin’!” 

The tiefling peers at her with desperate eyes, his flickering flame-like yellow irises beginning to gloss over again as new sobs begin to wrack through his fragile looking body. “I didn’t— I swear, I didn’t do a-anything!” 

She searches his face for any sign of deceit, noticing the faint scar that ran along his cheek from his eye to the corner of his lip that looked like it had only healed somewhat recently. His body language resembles that of a frightened pup in a cage and his tears seem genuine, so she offers him a reassuring smile. “I believe you.” 

“‘M talkin’ ta ye, missy! Ye got shit for manners too?” The man yells again, the sound of the broken instrument clattering to the ground following it. 

She continues to ignore him, entirely unfazed by his drunken tirade or his hulking size. She’d fought monsters far more intimidating in the last year, he would be quick work if it came to that. 

“‘Ye think yer too good fer ‘vryone, too good ta’ listen when a man talks ta’ ye.” He rants, her last few strings of patience beginning to wear dangerously thin.

“No, I just don’t care to listen to drunken oafs.” She retorts, her tone nonchalant and almost cocky in a way that sets the man over the edge.

The man launches into a blind rage, and she barely has a second to comprehend the situation before she hears a grunt of fury and large hands crash into the side of her body, surely bruising her ribs with the force it took to shove her to the ground, nearly knocking the breath from her lungs. She yelps as stone scrapes across her bare arm and the side of her head collides with the ground. The tiefling jumps backward and out of the line of fire of the older man’s warpath, eyes wide and boring into hers in terror. 

“Elara!” Gale calls out, pushing through the now dense crowd frantically. 

He finally makes it through, and the very second his eyes lock on her as she attempts to sit up, fire burns through his veins and concentrates at the center of his palm.

He notices a small trickle of blood running down the side of her face, one hand clutching her ribs as the other presses over the tender spot where her skull met stone. He’s at her side in an instant, gathering her up into his arms and holding on to her tightly. 

“Are you alright?” He asks her, his voice cracking with concern. 

She bristles, fury flaring within her. Before she can stop herself, her once brown eyes glow blue, the lightning coursing through her burning its way down to her palms. Gale’s eyes widened before scrambling to calm her before causing even more of a scene, despite her ire being well deserved on the drunken man’s end. 

“Not here, Elara. Let me handle this, please.” 

He places a hand on her cheek, his palm catching a drop of warm blood that makes his boil. 

After a moment of contemplation she nods, the anger still evident in her furrowed brow. She glances between him and the child backed against the wall, her main focus still on ensuring his safety. She motions to the child for him to stand with her, and Gale steps in front of them both protectively as he turns to face the drunkard. 

“‘S that yer boyfriend, eh, girly? Wanna know how it feels t’ be with a real man?” The man cackles, stumbling forward as he belly laughs at his own vile taunts. 

Gale’s own composure is slipping as he feels the heat from the fire itching at his fingertips as it begins to emit a faint and crackling orange glow. 

“It may be wise to walk away, friend.” Gale’s voice is threateningly calm, soft with a not-so-hidden edge to it. 

The man balks at the wizard, much smaller in stature than himself yet somehow still intimidating in nature. Likely more so intimidating once he realizes who he was up against. Not intimidating enough not to egg them on, however. 

The man’s yellowed teeth show in a crooked smile. “Aye… I know the two of ye. If it ain’t the cunt of Waterdeep and the so called Hero of Baldur’s Gate. Softened up since the squids left town, have ye?” 

Elara dashes forward before Gale’s arm comes out to stop her, magic surging between both of them like a thunderstorm brewing in the heavens. 

“Piss off, ugly. Lest you leave with a scorched hide.” Elara hisses, pushing against Gale’s arm that served as a barrier between them. 

“Didn’t think th’ mighty Hero of Baldur’s Gate wa’ just a common whore off th’ streets. Funny, that is, innit?” 

Gale’s shoulders tense and his jaw clenches, gritting his teeth to bite back the storm of curses burdening the tip of his tongue. “Walk away. Now.” 

His fingers twitch against the effort it takes not to hurl a fire bolt right at the bastard’s cocky face, but it seemed he wouldn’t have to as the man notices the faint glow of fire in Gale’s palm as well as the lightning crackling in Elara’s and begins to back away, apprehension etching into his weathered and sunburnt features, fear visible in his eyes. 

“You lot ‘re just as uppity as I thought ye’d be,” he mutters as he raises his hands in surrender, then quickly rounds the corner and dashes down the alley without another word, and the wizard relaxes his hand, dispelling the cantrip from his palm. 

The air is still crackling with tension as the three of them try to steady their breathing, Gale in particular finding it difficult as the sight of her on the ground and her sweet face that, prior to this entire encounter, had been adorned with a smile that could stop a charging Minotaur in its tracks, twisted in pain and a gash on her forehead. Not to mention the disgusting comment that foul—

Deep breaths. 

The crowd slowly begins to disperse, some eyeing the two wizards wearily as they begin to back away, some pointing at them and whispering to their counterparts, some recognizing them and some inquiring to who they were or what their significance was. 

Eventually they, too, depart, leaving only two of them and the tiefling who was still cowering behind Elara, gripping the back of her robes as if he would fall through a crack in the ground without her anchoring him. 

Gale spins around and cups Elara’s face gently, his umber eyes teeming with distress and a bit of anger as they scan her face for any further signs of injury or harm. Her eyes still glowed blue despite the situation stabilizing.

“Elara,” Gale whispers soothingly. “It’s over.” 

Her eyes meet his as she blinks a few times, until they return to their natural deep earthy tone, sparkling as water burgeons at the corners. 

Gods, she has the most beautiful eyes. 

“Are you well? Did he hurt you? Is your head okay?” He asks frantically, the words tumbling from his lips in rapid succession as he gently turns her head to check each side of her face. 

She swallows hard and tries not to get lost in the way his strong but elegant hands feel on her burning cheeks as he fusses over her, and places her hand over one of his in an attempt at calming his distraught babbling. 

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” she shushes him, placing her other hand on his arm. “Everything is fine.” 

Gale frowns. “It is most certainly not fine, you hit your head and you are bleeding. We should head back and clean that up, I’ll just run to the market tomorrow—”

“Gale.” She coos, cutting his rambling short. “You act as if you haven’t seen me in much more dire straits. I will live.” 

He stops, his entire body stilling and a heat creeping to his cheeks. Reality washes over him again as he blinks out of his worrisome daze, and realizes his hands still on her cheeks, and her hand over his— oh, hells, her hands are so soft, so warm— and slowly begins to pull away. She nods her head in the direction of the child attached to her hip, reminding him that they had company still. He takes a deep breath and glances around, likely looking to see if he catches a glimpse of that bastard and hoping that he was still within range for him to send a witch bolt his way. He’s unable to hide his disappointment when his search is fruitless. 

The child’s eyes widen when Gale turns once again to face them and sighs deeply, his shoulders sinking low when all of the air exits his lungs, his body seeming to shrink with his posture. He slams his eyes shut tight, pinching the bridge of his nose and taking slow and steady breaths to calm himself. 

“Mystra, give me strength.” He murmurs under his breath.

Elara ignores the disgruntled wizard at her side, leaning down slightly to be closer to the smaller tiefling’s height. 

Elara smiles reassuringly and places her hands on his shoulders. “I’m so sorry about that. Are you okay?” 

The child stares up at her, his eyes darting back and forth between her and the man brooding behind her. 

“He’s with me, it’s alright.” She says, making her best attempt at a soothing and calm tone despite her voice wavering. 

The tiefling’s eyes dart to the wreckage that is left of what was once his instrument, and his frown deepens. “My lyre…” 

She follows his gaze, wincing when she sees the extensive damage. She could tell instantly upon inspection even from a distance that there was no repairing it, and it would simply need to be replaced. She offers him a sympathetic smile and a pat on the shoulder. What was once what appeared to be a beautiful instrument, was now shattered into several jagged pieces, sprawling across the ground around them. She frowns, feeling regretful for its owner but also for herself— an echo of a memory from this morning when she heard her favorite song being strummed by it reverberating in her mind. 

“What’s your name?” She asks him. 

He bounces heel to toe, his hands behind his back timidly. His peach-tinted skin contrasts the dark mop of curls atop his head, with two small horns peeking out of them. He’s quite slender, but still has the tiny bit of pudge that a prepubescent child would have, his cheeks round and youthful. He reminds her of the kids from the Emerald Grove. She smiles sadly, hoping the ones that made it were doing well. 

“Dex.” He says meekly, his face downcast and defeated as if he’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. 

“It’s nice to meet you, Dex. I’m Elara, and this—” she motions to the man behind her. “is Gale.”

Gale’s attention snaps to her at the sound of his own name, clearly having been mentally elsewhere during the entire exchange. He meets the uncertain gaze of the child, and bows slightly, offering a warm smile. Dex smiles back, a small chuckle leaving his lips at the gesture. 

“Thank you, for helping me. I’m s-sorry you got hurt,” he points to her bloodied forehead and forearm, reminding her of the stinging sensation biting at her nerves shallowly within her skin. Her head was pounding and throbbing, her vision not entirely steady, but she tries her best to disregard it for the moment.

“I think I’ll live. I’m sorry about your lyre.” She says, motioning to the scattered wooden debris and frayed strings. 

He shrugs. “I’ll live.” 

She chuckles, her smile widening. Gale watches her with this unfamiliar child that she had no real reason to be so kind to, other than just out of the boundless kindness of her heart, and feels that warm twinge in his chest he’d grown all too familiar with since she made her grand entrance in his life. He’d seen her with kids many times now, whether it was with the tieflings or with Yenna, but each time his heart skips several beats and the urge to whisk her away and kiss her on the stoop like he’d previously imagined becomes harder and harder to resist.

“Well, Dex. I think you’d best get going home. It’ll be dark before too long and I’m sure your parents will be worried. Hm?” She tries on her best schoolteacher voice, placing her hands on her hips. 

Dex sighs, his entire body shrinking at the mention of his parents. “I don’t want to go home without my lyre… they’ll be furious at me.”

She pauses for a moment, then shoots Gale a pleading glance, hoping he has any bright ideas that could magically fix everything for this poor child. She looked at him as if the child were a lost kitten that she was begging him to let her bring home. 

He looks toward the sky pensively for a moment, appearing as if he were doing calculations in his head, then wordlessly and effortlessly waves his hand in a flourish, whispering an incantation that reassembles the lyre with a purple hued fog of weave. 

Dex’s widened eyes sparkle with glee as each of the fractured pieces of the instrument rejoin as if they’d never been apart to begin with. The lyre floats toward the child, basked in violet and sapphire light, landing gently into his still shaky grasp. Gale smiles and nods at the boy as the light fades, his eyes gleaming with a hint of pride. 

“Weeping bleeding hells! How did you do that?!” He chirps, turning the lyre in his hands and inspecting each and every inch of it in search of any cracks or imperfections, then smiling a wide toothy grin, his pointed teeth peeking over his lips when there is not a single dent or scratch to be found. 

Gale chuckles, then pats the boy on the shoulder. “Stay out of trouble, young man. Hopefully next time we meet will be under better circumstances.” 

She turns to Gale, impressed. “You have got to teach me whatever the hell that was.”

The young tiefling glances back to Elara, the exuberant expression on his face contrasting the tear stains still present on his cheeks. Before she or Gale have any time to react, he throws his body between them, wrapping his tiny arms around the both of them as best as he could manage, and nuzzling his face into Elara’s arm. 

“Thank you! Thank you so much!” He says as he pulls away and turns to leave, glancing over his shoulder and waving to them one last time before scurrying off. 

She watches the boy disappear into the distance, skipping along the cobblestone streets with a childish glee that fills her with a wistful sensation— to be that young and for everything to be so new, for something as simple as a fixed lyre to make her completely forget any hurt or pain that had befallen her. She envies him, silently, as she watches him run home to his parents surely to regale everything that happened to him today, just as she wished she’d been able to every time something exciting happened to her during the day. 

Gale notices her sudden shift in demeanor, then places a hand placatingly on her uninjured arm. 

“Elara?” His voice is gentle and tepid. “Allow me to help you with this,” he says, motioning to the still bleeding cut on her head. “Let’s head back.” 

She sighs, turning to him but unable to muster a genuine smile, still taken by real memories and those that never came to pass. Her lips curl, but her eyes remain glossy and sullen. She nods, the motion small and nearly imperceptible. Without another word, they head back to the tower, her arm never leaving the comfort of Gale’s hand as they walk. 

Something so simple, something that could mean nothing. But to her, it meant everything. 

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The scent of balsam and sandalwood fills the room as Gale’s adept fingers gently dab at the small cut on her forehead, his eyes narrowed and his brows knitted together in deep concentration.

He pestered her until he could coax her into sitting in her favorite spot on the chaise where he could tend to her, much to her protest.

Stubborn wizard, she grunted as he gently guided her to sit. He did not regard any of her disgruntled murmurs, nor her insistence that she was fine and not to worry. 

Just as she’d helped that boy on the street, he felt the least he could do is take gentle care of her the way she would anyone else. He recalled noticing her attempting to heal herself or patch her own wounds when no one was looking while they were on the road, before eventually having to ask Shadowheart for a quick healing spell, much to her dismay. Had she always had to pick herself up? Had no one ever swept in and dusted her off when she fell before? 

He would. From now forward. Even if it were something as small and simple as rubbing balsam on her wounds, however small, and wrapping it with the softest cloth he could find. He would be that for her. He would be anything for her, should she ask. 

It wasn’t lost on him how intimate of a gesture it was, to treat another’s wounds, either— he couldn’t deny that he simply just wanted to care for her in a way that felt deeper than just cooking for her and providing a bed for her to sleep in. 

“That was incredibly admirable of you, back there. Stepping in like that. That boy won’t soon forget what you’ve done for him.” He says, his tone reverent and almost thankful on the child’s behalf.

She smiles a soft smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. 

“Guess the hero gig is one I haven’t quite given up on,” she half-jokes. “He seemed like a sweet kid. And I would hope someone would do the same if it were me, in his shoes.” 

She says it, but she realizes that Gale sort of had done the same for her, many times— especially the way he stepped in and deescalated the situation today. The way he stood in front of them protectively, blocking them with his body as if he were willing and ready to take whatever blows were aimed at them in their place. 

“He’ll remember you, too,” she continues, her breath slightly catching as he rubs balsam on the still raw and tender spot just above her eyebrow, and wincing as the fabric of the cloth brushes against the raised skin. “You saved him twice, in a way. Saved him from a drunkard and an angry lecture from his parents.” 

He chuckles, shaking his head causing a stray strand of hair to fall into his eyes as he does. “I suppose so. You took care of all the heavy lifting, though. I just helped with the clean up.” 

She fights herself and her need to push that hair out of his eyes. Would that be too intimate? Would that push things too far? 

Her eyes lock on the strand as she speaks. “You did your own heavy lifting, for my sake. Thank you. For stepping in. And for this,” her eyes dart up to his wrist, just as he finishes. “Even though you didn’t have to.” 

He places the soiled cloth aside then sits back slightly, where he was still able to see every detail of her face as clearly as he could see his own in a mirror when he was close enough, and eyes her for a moment, a smile ghosting on the edges of his lips. 

“To do something for someone doesn’t always have to be borne of necessity or desire for reciprocity. I wanted to.” 

His face was so close, she could nearly feel his breath whispering across the flushed skin of her cheeks. She wants to say thank you again, but finds that every single word in her vocabulary has escaped her as she basks in this closeness and the way she can see the reflection of the flickering candle beside her in his dark eyes that still managed to seem so bright with the way they twinkled as he looked at her. 

“Can I ask you something?” He breaks the silence but not the tension as their gazes stay locked. 

She nods, dazed by the closeness, intoxicated by his presence.

“Back in the Shadow Cursed Lands… when you said that our relationship couldn’t go any further… did you mean that?”

She swallows hard despite her throat feeling dry, her entire body tensing at his questioning. The emotions of the day had fluctuated so immensely and the mention of the thing that had been weighing so heavily on her mind for so long only served to bid them to return in full force. A pit forms in her stomach and she feels the urge to retreat. 

“Gale...” She tries to maintain composure, despite her words wavering upon delivery. She offers Gale that same smile from before— the one that never quite reached her eyes. He frowns, but nods. 

“Understood.” He says simply, their faces still dangerously close.

“No, no— I don’t mean— I am just not sure if I have the proper words to convey to you. I—” He moves one hand to comfortingly cover hers as it rests on her knee, patting it gently.

“Perhaps it was too bold of a question after such a harrowing day. Disregard it.” 

The warmth of his hand and his words radiates throughout her entire body, down to her bones. She notices the strand is still hanging in front of his eyes. She doesn’t hold herself back from brushing it away this time, her fingertips lightly graze his forehead as she tucks it behind his ear. Her hand lingers near his face for a while, but not nearly long enough, before she drops it back to her side.

“What if I said no?” She utters fearfully, her voice betraying her and her moment of courage. “Does that change things?”

Gale balks at her, taken aback by the gesture and her words, quick flickers of shock, trepidation, then elation flashing across his expression. He smiles a smile that sends a shiver through her, his eyes dropping to her lips and the gap between them suddenly seeming so much smaller. 

Oh. 

It was getting smaller, as she realized that the magnetic pull between their lips was getting stronger as they both began to lean in, her body taking the reins as her mind tried to make sense of what was happening and determine if she were dreaming or not— had she hit her head hard enough to hallucinate?

“Mr. Dekarios?”

The sound of Tara’s voice calling from down the hall cuts the moment short, both of their heads snapping in the direction of the sudden intrusion. Gale sighs, his head falling in evident disappointment. He glances at her, her eyes wide and her cheeks a bright rosy red that makes his heart flutter. 

“Gods damn it... I should—”

“No worries, go ahead. I’m going to go rest, my head is killing me.” She waves him off, her voice strained and brimming with disappointment.

Gale stares at her for a moment, the desire to kiss her still lingering but ebbing as he sees her pulling away, suddenly feeling as though he’d done something terribly wrong. He opens his mouth to ask, but before he can she’s standing and quickly darting across the room and into the hall, stopping just at the doorway and peering at him over her shoulder. 

She sighs, placing a hand on the doorway and using it for support, her legs feeling as though they may give out on the spot. “Thank you, again.” 

He watches helplessly as she disappears into the hall and the sounds of her footsteps fade slowly, preceded by the sound of a  bedroom door clicking shut. His eyes pinch shut so tightly that he sees stars amidst the inky blackness behind them, and he sinks back into his chair, wishing a blackhole would form underneath him and swallow him.

He could conjure one, if he wanted to. 

He heavily considered it. 

“Mr. Dekarios, fix your posture! Your back already aches enough as it is,” Tara admonishes him as she strolls into the room, blissfully unaware of the havoc she’d just wreaked on his sanity. 

As per usual. 

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There were a surprising amount of cracks in the ceiling above the bed in the room that she stayed in. 

Everything else in this tower seemed nearly pristine aside from appearing well lived in and well loved, Gale evidently cared greatly about his surroundings. The home was cluttered but organized to his exact liking, perfectly tidy apart from books and papers and scrolls strewn about but still cozy and comfortable. Anyone who entered would feel at home. 

She felt at home, more than she wanted to admit to herself. She tried to continue to remind herself that at some point she would have to leave and move on. But as she lay in this bed— this large, ever so comfortable bed— gaze trailing along the strangely cracked ceiling of her bedroom, she wondered what the ceiling of his bedroom looked like. 

She was certain there were no cracks in his bedroom ceiling. There couldn’t be. 

Today had been immensely overwhelming in terms of her feelings toward Gale that had once been burning embers and were now alight in full force— him having stoked the flames tenfold with his seemingly innocent touches and his ardent care for her that he put on full display multiple times throughout the day, all culminating in an almost-kiss. 

They almost kissed. He almost kissed her.

They were so close. She could still feel the heat of his breath against her cheeks and the skin on the back of her hand tingled with the sensation as if his hand remained there still, his thumb rubbing languid circles against her wrist.

In fact, every part of her skin that he’d touched today still felt as if it had been electrically charged, still buzzing and alight with energy that had nowhere to go. She missed the feeling of him already and it was only a mere whisper of a taste rather than an entire bite. 

It wasn’t entirely her fault, obviously, that it never came to pass— Tara had a way of having serendipitously terrible timing. She wasn’t always sure that Tara didn’t know exactly what she was doing, and she wouldn’t be surprised if that were the case this time. 

It was endearing, most of the time. 

But even if Tara hadn’t interrupted— would she have really kissed him? Would he have really kissed her? Or would some other force of nature and horrible timing pluck them out of each other's grasps yet again? 

She thinks maybe he would have. She hopes. 

Now, she’s not sure she’ll ever get the chance to. 

Guilt began to gnaw and claw at her insides furiously as she remembered the way she’d exited the study— hurried and curtly— and the way hurt and confusion etched into his features as he watched her leave.

She loved him. She knew that she did. There was no way around it. She loved him and it was killing her.

But something always stops her in the moments when she longs to tell him, to finally let him in.

It wasn’t that she was inexperienced in the romance department— she’d had a few partners here and there, nothing substantial and all quite short lived— and if she’s being honest, she had never felt strongly toward a single one of them. Most were kind, loving. She enjoyed their company. But she’d never felt comfortable enough to open up to another person and allow them to see the less than savory bits of her that she kept to herself.

And strangely enough, she felt very comfortable with Gale most of the time— she had to, during all those months traveling together. They all saw each other at their worst and lowest moments, but they supported each other through it all. Gale had been particularly helpful to her amidst her own personal struggles she faced in that time. He had been the closest to her, aside from Astarion and Shadowheart.

He’s an easy person to just exist with. That is, if you aren’t hopelessly enamored with him. 

Gods. 

She clenches her eyes shut and pinches the bridge of her nose— another habit of Gale’s that she’d picked up— wishing the large quilt and plush mattress beneath her would just swallow her. Just take her away from it all and save her from having to deal with the consequences of her own idiocy. 

Knock knock. 

“Elara?” 

The sound of Gale’s voice on the other side of her door lurches her from her thoughts and her body up from the mattress. She quickly hops off of the bed and approaches the door, her hand hovering shakily over the handle. 

“Yes?” She asks, turning her head so her voice appears further away than it actually was. 

She hears what sounds like feet shuffling aside from a brief pause, before hearing a long and defeated sigh. 

“Can we talk?” Is all he manages, dejection evident in his tone. 

She reaches for the handle again, turning it slowly and pulling the door just enough to see him through the crack. 

He looked the way he did when something was weighing heavily on his mind or vexing him— she could tell he’d been raking his fingers frantically through his hair as it was uncharacteristically messy and unkempt, his robes were nowhere to be seen, and he stood only in his white wrap shirt that was tied dangerously loosely and tucked into his breeches. 

Not now, brain. Not now. 

“Everything alright?” She asks, trying to hide the sound of her swallowing the massive lump in her throat. 

He shakes his head, placing his hand against the wood grain and gently pushing it, opening it further. 

“The very question I came to ask you,” he retorts. “May I?” 

She nods, backing away from the door to give him enough room to push it the rest of the way open, her heart thudding a million a minute.

He stands in the doorway, leaning against the frame, his expression nearly unreadable. For as expressive as his eyes were, she had such a hard time understanding him or trying to sort out what mental storm was brewing in his head sometimes.

“I could not bear resting my head upon my pillow and or fathom sleeping a wink tonight without knowing whether I’ve done something to upset you or not. If I crossed any lines today, please do tell me, and allow me to offer my most sincere of apologies for—”

What? 

“Gale—“ 

“—ever making you feel uncomfortable or uneasy in any way, I would never want to jeopardize the friendship that I feel we have formed over the course of this past year and—”

“Gale, hold on—”

“—if I’ve done something to potentially sour anything, just know it was never my intention—“ 

“Gale!” She raises her voice in a final attempt to catch the rambling wizard’s attention, crossing the space between them and placing her hands on his shoulders. 

He takes a deep breath, his shoulders tense and she can feel the way his body trembles slightly. 

“Relax, please. You haven’t done anything to make me uncomfortable. Ever.” She coos, rubbing circles with her thumb into his shoulder. 

A few days ago, a gesture like this would’ve made her entire being feel as though she were on fire— but after today, it felt right. After receiving such care and comfort from him, the least she felt she could do was to return it in kind. 

He stares at her incredulously, as if he simply just doesn’t believe a word she’s saying. 

“You don’t have to spare me, Elara. I saw that look in your eyes. I never want to make you feel that way, ever again.” His face softens as he speaks, the pain of potentially slighting her in some way weighing heavily on his chest. 

She blinks a few times, then that gnawing guilt returns with even sharper teeth, maybe some claws too. She pinches her eyes shut and releases a long breath from her nose. 

“You— you think I didn’t want to kiss you?” She murmurs under her breath.

“I feel as though I keep pushing you and all I’ve done is push you further away.” He responds, the hurt evident in his slightly quivering voice.

Her eyes had begun to burn at this point.

“Gale… it isn’t you. Truly,” she cringes at her own words, realizing how it sounded. “I just— there is a lot on my mind right now, and I don’t want to burden you with any of it. That’s all.”

It wasn’t a lie, at least not entirely. There was a lot on her mind— even if most of it pertained to a certain brown eyed wizard who happened to be standing in her doorway, looking like that. 

His eyes find hers in the dim candlelight, searching them for something, anything that could answer at least one of the myriad of questions he wanted to but couldn’t muster the nerve to ask.

The pale blue moonlight filters in through the large window on the other side of the room, almost haloing her and basking her in an ethereal glow. 

“It’s not a burden if it’s taken on willingly,” he contests, taking one tentative step toward her. “I care for you, Elara.”

If the room had been any quieter, she swears the sound of her heart booming through the smaller space would be deafening. “It’s not important. You have many other things to concern yourself with, I don’t expect you to—”

“The only thing concerning me presently is—” he pauses. You, is what he wants to say, but can’t seem to wrench it out of himself. “What is important to you is important to me. I meant it when I said that we work better as a team, you and I.” 

How this man has not been wed yet, is beyond madness to her.

“Gale…” it comes out more as a plea, as she feels her resolve to maintain composure weakening bit by bit as the conversation continues. She was exhausted, physically and mentally, and her heart had been through enough strain in one day. 

His shoulders sink. This was one of several attempts now that he’d made to break down the walls she had built up, and he was beginning to feel more like the villain rather than the hero coming to rescue the trapped maiden from her tower. 

“I do apologize. I fear I have overstepped once again. Here may be a good place to leave this conversation for now. I’ll let you rest.” He resigns, his words betraying the sullen expression he held. 

“Gale, no, I didn’t mean—” 

He holds his hand up to stop her. “It’s quite alright. Get some rest. Goodnight, Elara.” 

Before she can stop him, he turns to leave, pulling the door shut behind him. 

The room suddenly feels several degrees colder than it had prior to what had just occurred. She feels as though all of the oxygen had been sucked from her lungs and every bit of strength had been sapped from her body within a split second— emotional fortitude included, as tears that had been begging to be shed that she had been neglecting for longer than she could confidently say finally began to fall, slipping down her cheeks and wetting the collar of her night shirt. 

Her head falls back as she makes eye contact with the ceiling once again, gaze finding a large crack just above where she stood. It looked fresh, almost. Like it had occurred within the last day or so. 

She wondered if he noticed it while he stood in the doorway. 

She wondered if he was in his room, staring at the ceiling of his own bedroom. 

“Goodnight, Gale.” She whispers into the darkness of the night.

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(lmk if you’d like to be tagged in the coming chapters :3)

[astray-anomaly]

Equivaltale story, Part 2!!

Make sure to read Part 1 first!

Trigger warnings: Violence, character death, major character death, descriptions of body horror, cult activity, child abuse/neglect, mentions of grooming; physical abuse and sexual abuse, transpobia, child labour

Be mindful of the trigger warnings but this chapter is more calm then the last

The sun beamed bright in the clear sky when the creature started to wake again. They could feel the gentle breeze caress them, the grass and growth lightly brushing against their melted bones.

How long has it been?

Their body moved stiffly as they started observing their surroundings. All the blood dried up and the bodies now hidden in the ground like nothing ever happened. They barely remembered anything, their memories were very fuzzy but all they knew was they were no longer in pain, at least not as terrible as before.

They were cautious but curious of the world around them. Everything felt so new and yet so familiar to them. They explored the village down in the valley, all the buildings now in ruins and reclaimed by the foliage and small wildlife who made homes in the cracks.

In the ruins there were still useful things that they would take, like clothes, books, and anything that they found interesting. Collecting shiny items and small toys, ranging from dolls to wooden figurines. After all they were still a child, they were rediscovering the world but they were far from unintelligent.

They needed to figure out who they were and what happened, that was their goal. Deep down they knew they weren’t always like this, they needed to find the answers to their past.

Even with all their searching they still couldn’t find many of the missing pieces, they found scriptures that mentioned two children by the names of Dream and Nightmare, they felt a connection to the two but couldn’t figure out why. It didn’t help that most of the scriptures were faded or crumbled.

They tried to figure out as much as they could, maybe they were related? Then who were they? That’s when they realized they had no name, nothing to call themself. Until they found something, a painting of the sky, the galaxy. Talking about the symbolism between the sun and the moon and the connection to the twins, yet there was something else in the painting, a shining star that caught their attention, Sirius.

…Sirius

That would be their name.

Even if Sirius had figured out a name they still were lost, there wasn’t much to do after all. Just day in and day out of going to the village then back to the tree. However one day they felt like they weren’t alone, there was another’s presence.

Suddenly they would be face to face with another being, who they viewed as a threat, after all everyone who had come before had hurt them. Yet she held no fear to them, coming forward and introducing herself as Lanny, the Guardian of Magic.

She was sent to look after them after feeling their soul awaken, she would train them to be the new guardian. They had the last piece of Nim’s magic, the last apple keeping the balance of feelings, they couldn’t die. Even if they didn’t trust each other and Sirius was still a child, they needed to learn quickly.

Lanny had decided Sirius would stay in this world and she would come to train them. It didn’t seem like they would want to leave anyway, given their stubborness. It was easier to watch over them and she wouldn’t have to worry about them doing anything to the tree of magic.

The corruption was still resting within them so she was cautious, no matter how passive they were she never let her eye leave them every time she was there.

Lanny would visit them almost everyday to teach and train them. Providing them information of Nim, the tree, and the magic they now possessed.

Yet she didn’t explain everything to them, not yet.

Eventually they would be training to defend and fight for themself, having to be taught how to make the most of what they had. Their body was different, they could move very fluidly, like liquid. They also had wings however it would be a few years since they could be useful for anything. They were still too small to carry them currently.

Next they had to choose weapons of their own to work with, trying a large variety. They decided their main weapons would be a bow and a spear. The spear allowed swift movement for closer range and they were surprisingly naturally good at archery.

When they weren’t training on certain days they would try to figure out more about their past. The things Lanny wouldn’t tell them, but they’re not sure if she even knew the full story.

As they got older they started to remember more and more. Remembering moments of joy and ones of torture, but some memories seemed blocked from their view. They were all mixed up, sometimes they remembered things from different perspectives.

At first they just thought it was weird dreams till they started to piece everything together. Some memories they were Dream, others they were Nightmare. Then it finally clicked together, why didn’t they figure this out sooner?

They weren’t related to Dream and Nightmare, they were Dream and Nightmare.

Everything made sense now but it hurt so much more. They cried for the twins, sad, confused, and enraged. Now having to carry the burden of everything that happened to them, the torment, the lies, the pain.. everything.

It caused them to snap at Lanny for hiding such a thing, but she said it was for their own safety, they were still just a teenager. Even if she wasn’t the best mentor she wanted to try to help them with their pain when they were ready but it seemed fate had other plans.

She was already going through her own pain of losing Nim, someone she held so close to her, someone she had shared her whole life with. She had to push all her feelings down in order to train Sirius, but everything just spilled when the two fought. Like a cracked vase holding still water finally shattering.

Then they realized that they were both hurting and yelling at each other was useless. Sirius couldn’t forgive Lanny for hiding such a thing, the very explanation for their very existence, but they understood her. She had her reasons, but it still was very painful to find out.

After the fight Lanny hadn’t visited for days and Sirius was alone to process their memories and who they were. They had to come to terms with the truth.

The twins were gone, their mother was gone. They were so young and they already had blood on their hands, they killed the villagers. Though they felt no remorse for those cruel twisted people. Yet that just meant in the end they were all alone.

Alone to deal with the guilt they now felt for just existing. Their body was nothing more than a vessel, it couldn’t even be called their body, it wasn’t. Their only purpose here was to keep the balance, they didn’t even feel like a person.

Though in the silence of their loneliness they could hear whispers, the voices of the twins. Like they were speaking to them, they felt so close yet so far away, just out of grasp. Maybe it could be possible they weren’t so alone, even with the twins gone. Maybe, just maybe there were parts of the twins with them other than just their bodies and magic, something to help guild them.

They couldn’t give up, no, they would be weak if they surrendered themself like this. To give up just because of everything that happened, everything that created their own existence in the first place. There had to be a reason for them to be here or this would all be for nothing. They would keep going for the twins, for the two children whose lives were taken away from them too soon. They would live for them in spite of everything that happened.

They still had no choice but to be the new guardian however they would do it their own way. There would be nobody to push them around or try to control them like some puppet. They were free now, they were no longer trapped in a cage, forced to never fly.

They had their wings, they were finally free.

Still, they had to finish their training before they could even get to that point.. They weren’t exactly a real guardian yet..

When Lanny returned they had a long discussion, in the end both learned to come to terms with each other. They couldn’t blame each other for everything that happened, it wasn’t in anyone's control or anyone’s fault.

Sirius learned to accept that, it was all in the past now. Still it was going to be a long time before they could come to terms with their existence and the pieces of trauma passed down to them. They needed to learn how to cope but learning to accept the past was a start.

Right now they had to focus on the present, now that they completed their training it was time for them to help the balance become stable again. To help all the other worlds, to help those who were suffering like they once were. Help them escape this twisted game of fate.

It was time for them to become the new Guardian of Feelings..

[eatmeandbirthmeagain]

hello! a little fic request I’ve been thinking on, not pressuring you to write it or anything, just wanted to share.

the y/n is a hot tempered foreign princess who got married to Baldwin when they were both children. she’s very energetic, straightforward, man-like in her character, but has to adapt to fit in the court of Jerusalem and also to „suit” her husband’s calm manner and the fact that he’s ill doesn’t help.

she’s unhappy about it; maybe even tears a little during the wedding, but doesn’t let anyone to think she may be vulnerable (mostly because she understand that that can be used against her in the future after Baldwin dies). but over the time she finds herself drawn to Baldwin because, well, unlike her teachers, he lets her study and play chess with him. he cares about her desires and interests. he also respects her, not just like a woman but as a friend, and a clever one. maybe some of her advice on the politics is used by him at some point (which would be absolutely unrealistic, but really, we’re talking historical romance with a leper king here…). a cute detail would be him gifting her a weapon of some sort to protect herself because he knows how she doesn’t like being treated like she’s helpless. bonus points if he says something romantic and or pathos’y about it.

did I write this whole oc story as a multiple chapter fanfiction in my head? yes, I did. am I going to finish it? absolutely no. but I’d love to read your interpretation!

♧ "Princess" - King Baldwin x Reader ♧

♧ Angst ♧

A/N: Hello Anon! So sorry for taking so long to write this, ive had so many requests. I'm not sure if this is what you had in mind but it was my interpretation and I hope you like it! I dont really like how it turned out as your request had so much detail and my writing does that no justice, but I hope its okay ☺️! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figgures. This is also set pre-film. Enjoy!

TW: Leprosy

At thirteen years old, marriage was the last thing on young y/n’s mind. But yet, here she was. Soon to arrive in the city of Jerusalem, to be wed to a boy she had only ever met a handful of times.

Baldwin the fourth. The leper, who's mother just so happend to be ready to find him a wife at the same time her father was ready to find her a husband.

She sat in silence for the entire journey, this was uncommon for her. She usually always had something interesting to say or something to observe with curiosity. But as per request by her father, from now on she “had to act like a proper lady. No more of this ridiculous 'masculine' behavior”.

“You will be wed to a king y/n” he had told her. “You must stop acting the way you do. No king will be allowed such behavior from his wife”. 

Her attempt to keep to herself for the journey had been successful so far. She remained silent and still. Just as her mother taught her. “Just how a lady should be”. 

As the city came into view, y/n felt tears begin to burn her eyes. She would never again be allowed to explore the wilderness on her fathers land, or read every book she was allowed to have from the library. She surrendered herself to a life of boredom and suppression. 

Once exiting the carriage, she was greeted by the royal officials as well as the king's mother.

“I am so pleased to finally meet you young lady" she greeted her with a smile "you shall make a fine wife for my son” . Y/n thanked her and was ushered off quickly to prepare her for the hour of the wedding.

Y/n held back tears as servants worked busily around the room. Dressing her in beautiful garments, jewelry, and makeup. She was distraught. But she dare not cry. They could not see her so weak.

----------------------

The events proceeded and y/n barely even looked at the boy she was marrying. She could not bring herself to make eye contact with the man who would rule her life forever.

They told her to smile. “No man wants to see a lady disappointed on her wedding day” the king's mother had told her before they entered the church.

Baldwin himself was nervous about this day but just enthusiastic. Unlike y/n, he was looking forward to being wed to a young woman. He did not want just a wife to serve him, but a companion too. Someone who he could speak to about all kinds of things. Someone who would love him as much as he loved them. When he saw her, she looked beautiful, but sad. Very sad.

He hoped she was not sad about marrying him. Perhaps his illness deterred her from wanting to even be near him.

But she was still beautiful. She was 14, just like him. He could not take his eyes off her. He had met her a few times before, and she interested him deeply, even though they barely spoke. He more so just watched her play and talk with the other young people from his bedroom chamber window, longing to join them if it was not for his illness.

She played more with the young boys than she did with the girls. Always full of energy and life, always talking and laughing. But now, she looked different. As if the light had been drained from her. 

--------------------

When the wedding was over, the young king and queen got acquainted in the boy's chambers. She still seemed very quiet and unsure about his presence.

“Are you alright?” He asked her the second they were alone. “Yes your highness” she replied in a small voice, very different to the excitable tone she used to have. She sighed and lowered herself onto the small couch, turning away from him to look at her hands.

Baldwin thought for a moment, but then remembered that his mother requested he chose a wedding gift to present her after the affairs.

“I have a gift for you,” he said happily, lightening the mood.

He noticed her eyes light up a little at the comment. “You do?”

“Yes, would you like to see it?”

Y/n nodded excitedly, a smile forming on her face for the first time all day. The boy stood and disappeared behind the red, satin curtains that covered the large windows. He returned a few seconds later with something behind his back and a wide smile.

"I had to hide it, so my mother did not see what I chose for you" he explained. This peeked y/n's intrest greatly.

“Alright, close your eyes, '' he told her, the smile still plastered to his face. Y/n shut her eyes with anticipation. When he told her to open her eyes, she was lost for words. In the young king's bandaged hands, he held a shining silver sword with a pale pink ribbon tied around the handle.

Her eyes widened and stared at the sword for a long time before taking it in her hands to admire it. “Do you like it?” he asked, cautiously, hoping he had not offended her.

“Baldwin.. I love it!!” she exclaimed with a grin, jumping to her feet and wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a tight hug. The smile returned to his face and he put his arms around her waist.

“Now you can defend yourself my love. No wife of mine will be left vulnerable, even if there are men to protect her. She will defend herself, because she is strong.” His words filled the queen with happiness and hope. Perhaps her father was wrong after all and she could remain as herself. At least in the presence of her husband. 

-------------------

From that day on, they were inseparable. Unlike y/n’s tutors and parents, he allowed her access to his entire private library so they could study and read together. He allowed her time to herself, so she could do the things she loved without anybody telling her how to behave.

He quite often went as far as to seek her out for advice on political issues, not allowing her straightforward intelligence to go to waste.

Overtime, y/n became used to her duties as queen, but as much as she learnt to fit the role, she treasured her time alone with Baldwin. He cared about her interests, her desires. He respected her, more than anyone else ever had. They played chess together as well, each game being a delightful battle of the mind.

He saw her as not just a wife, but as a companion and an intelligent one at that. And for this, she would be forever greatful.

[newtsniffles]

It Is Always Him | Daemon Targaryen

Pairing: Daemon Targaryen x Fem!Targaryen!Reader

Summary: You could not help but to worry about your uncle who was currently fighting a war, because it was him. It was always him.

Warning/s: Not proof read, other than that, just some fluff I suppose? Daemon being caring?

Word count: 1.8k

You had always loved the dawn. The rise of the sun in King’s Landing always casted a fiery hue over the once starlit sky. From The Red Keep, you had one of the best views in what you would say in all of Westeros. The same heated colours would cast their reflections onto The Narrow Sea, and your lilac irises would take the sight in like a child would with a table full of sweets. Always, since the first name day you could remember, you would wake and gaze out the windows of your bed chambers. Even if it meant you to be left tired and in need of an afternoon nap when the sun reached the peak. However, these days you found yourself staring out to the horizon more often than usual. In the dawn, throughout the day as the sun flew overhead, when the day turned to dusk, and out to the stars on many sleepless nights. Was nobody worried for your uncle but you? Did anybody else care that he could die at war?

The second child of King Viserys and his late wife, Aemma, you were ignored as another daughter. Rhaenyra was ‘The Realm’s Delight,’ the first born by mere hours, but you? You were just another failed attempt at a son. Sometimes you wondered, if you had of been born even a few moments before your dear sister, would it be different? Your uncle, Daemon, was the only person you could ever say was really ‘there’ for you. Yes, he tended to disappear for a while every now and then or get exiled only to be back a few turns of the moon later. But it was him who understood you. It was him who knew the feeling of being outcasted by his family, to be alone yet surrounded by the living and breathing. For it was him who chose the dragon egg that laid in your cradle with you as a babe. It was him who helped you to name the large, black-scaled phantom. A name your beloved dragon, Daerys, had earnt for herself as she blended into the night sky, invisible to the eyes of people below. It was Daemon that taught you as a child to speak High Valyrian. It was Daemon that showed you a few tricks in protecting yourself. It was Daemon who—It was always, Daemon.

Since you had heard of the war, you would stare out to the sky in hopes of seeing Caraxes swooping his way to the dragon pit with your uncle on his back. It has been two years, and you have yet to see what you desire. You had begged your father with each turn of sun to moon that he would send help for Daemon. After two full turns of the seasons, he did, but never was it for you.

The sight of a Targaryen ship in the distance drew you from your thoughts. Ah, Rhaenyra must be returning from her tour to find a suitable husband. That was one thing that you never found yourself jealous of. Father had recommended to you that you get married as well, but it was less of a rush as you were not set to inherit the throne. You could not tell how long you had been staring at the ship before a piercing roar had echoed through the never-ending skies. You need not a moment to realise the sound of Caraxes, nor do you need a mere second as his red, snake-like body tore through the sky. The question you were asking yourself was only this: was your uncle on the back of The Blood Wyrm? If so, was he injured, was he even alive? Or did the dragon carry his bloodstained body?

“Kepus—” uncle. You rushed out the doors of your chambers. Nimble feet made their way to the throne room without a second thought as the whispers of servants echoed around the halls. You stood to the right, looking across on tipped toes to your sister who stood across the way. She was always kind to you, you loved her dearly, and she was aware of the affection you held for your uncle. With a nod of her head, a breath you had not realised you had been holding left your lips. He was alive.

It was when he turned the corner and walked proudly with his chest puffed that you finally felt the tension leave your body. You had barely listened to a thing he said to your father, too busy thanking the Gods for his safe return. As the two embraced, and appeared as brothers for once in their lives, a small smile had graced your face. For this was the best thing that could happen, perhaps your father would let him stay here instead of exiling him for going against orders again. Perhaps, with this win under his belt, your father would now care less of your affections for Daemon, and let you spend your leisure time with him freely.

“We shall throw festivities to honour your valiant effort and victory, brother.”

You had never been one for these sorts of gatherings, or well… gatherings in general. There was no point in being at them, only to be disregarded, ignored, alone. But this was to celebrate Daemon’s victory. And you had hope that he would seek you out to talk, that he would embrace you so you could hear the beating of his heart, further confirming for you that he is alive and well. Leaning against a stone pillar, you watched onwards as he was mid-discussion with your father, Alicent, and Rhaenyra. You could go over there, but you would rather stay where you are. Not a fan of Alicent, or your father for a fact, considering he was no fan of yours. You wondered if Daemon had thought about you at all in his years away. If he had missed, you as much as you did him. It was when he gazed up at you through lightly coloured brows from a distance that you knew he had thought of you, at least once. His purple eyes always told what his words could not. And his eyes in this very moment told you that he too, did not wish for these festivities, that he too would rather be in your company and your company alone.

“Excuse me,” Daemon gave a nod to his brother before beginning the short walk away from the festivities to you. As he moved closer, you took note of his features. He had not changed much, and you were grateful that no scars were visible for it would pain you greatly to know he was once hurt. His hair had been cut short, a strand fell over his forehead, and you noted that it suited him well. “Issi ao daor emare kirimves, ñuha dōna niece?” Are you not having fun, my sweet niece? Daemon came to a stop, barely half a metre away from his niece.

“Ao gīmigon īlen dōrī really mēre syt these ra, kepus.” You know I was never really one for these things, uncle.

“Nor iksin nyke.’ nor am I.

“I thought you would be enjoying this. It is for your victory after all,” you gazed up at him playfully, for he was far taller than you. “Perhaps now, father might leave you alone.”

“I think we both know that not possible,” he smirked down at you. A few moments passed of you only looking at each other. But it wasn’t awkward. It was comfortable.

“I missed you,” you couldn’t help but admit. “I begged father everyday to send help. But I hear that in the end, you did not need it.” Daemon glances to the side before reaching forward to tuck a stray hair behind your ear.

“You need not worry about me, dōna riña,” sweet girl. He smiles softly, a smile reserved for you only. The names he called you never failed to leave you flustered. “Were you treated well while I was away?”

“The same as usual. I tend to be left to keep to myself,” you sigh. “Rhaenyra has been busy with heir duties, despite her wishes. I don’t believe I have had a proper conversation with someone in many turns of the moon. It has been lonely.” Daemon’s purple eyes stare into the lilac of your own.

“Iksā daor mērī, dōrī mērī,” you are not alone, never alone. Daemon whispered in their native tongue for only them to understand.

“Skorkydoso would ao gīmigon? emā daor issare kesīr,” how would you know? You have not been here. You tried desperately to push away the tears that threaten to fall like a wounded soldier in battle. Daemon grabs your hand, with a quick glance over his shoulder, he pulls you around the corner and away from any prying eyes. Hand moving to settle on your cheek, thumb grazing a lone tear.

“Īlen mijegon iā iderennon. Nyke would dōrī henujagon ao mērī ondoso iderennon.” I was without a choice. I would never leave you alone by choice. “Viserys is weak. Lo nyke gōntan daor jikagon naejot vīlībāzma, īlon mirre would botagon,” If I did not go to war, we all would suffer.

“I know,” you sighed. Your arms wrap around his torso, head moving to nuzzle into his chest. His own arms move, one around your shoulders, the other hand cradles your head. “I was scared that you would not return.”

“But I did,” his hand runs across your white hair before pulling back to place them both on your cheeks, bringing your head out from his chest. In his eyes, you could see a man that has been to war, a man that has faced death, and been the death of many men. And yet in his presence, you weren’t sure it possible that you could feel any safer. And as you gazed into his eyes, you didn’t know if it was boldness or weakness, but you leant forward and placed a kiss to the corner of his mouth. Daemon closed his eyes and rested his forehead against your own

“īlon jorrāelagon naejot jikagon aril,” we need to go back.

“Gaomagon īlon?” Do we? Daemon whispered. His thumb moved to run along your lower lip before he passionately connected them with his own. Your back pushes against the wall behind you in his fervour. Your arms move around his neck, fingers toying with the hair on the back of his neck.

“People could see,” you whisper as his lips follow along your jaw and down to your neck.

“Let them,” Daemon presses one last kiss to your temple. “Ivestragī zirȳ gīmigon iksā ñuhon, dōna jorrāelagon. Iksā protected ondoso nyke.” Let them know you are mine, sweet love. You are protected by me. His. Yes, that sounds as it should. It is always him. It is always, Daemon.

-

enjoy my work? consider tipping me for a kofi

[devilsrecreation]

Buckle up bc this is gonna be heavy

Imagine an “It’s a Wonderful Life” type TLG fanfic/episode (ik ik cliche much?) where Jasiri starts having doubts about being an under-appreciated ruler of the Outlands after a particularly bad day. She doesn’t wish that she was never born, but she DOES start to wonder if she made the right choice of agreeing to the role of Prime Minister. Cue Ushari’s ghost visiting her in her dreams and telling her how the Outlands would be worse without her ruling it, and it soon devolves to what an alternate world would look like without her in it

-Without her, Kion’s perception of hyenas wouldn’t have changed and he wouldn’t have learned “Sisi ni Sawa”. Not only him, but she showed a lot of animals how there were good hyenas

-Not only has she saved Janja’s life multiple times, but she changed his views on life in general. He would have never started respecting the circle of life. At the most, he’d probably be dead and his boys would follow through without a leader

-Janja may have told Kion how to defeat Scar, but it was really her who convinced everyone to actually listen to him in the first place

-Life would have definitely been harder for her clan if she was never born. Madoa wouldn’t have a shoulder to cry on or anyone to assure her that the clan will get through their hardships. Hell, I don’t know if Wema and Tunu would have made it without her since she always put their needs over hers

-The rest of the Outlanders would have never had another chance had she not been a prime minister

-Reirei and her pack wouldn’t have accepted to respect the circle of life and would have been worse off had they moved

-Kiburi’s float would have stayed independent…and that would have been their downfall. Unlike the Pridelands, the Outlands have less food and water. Because of Kiburi’s pride, he wouldn’t think or trust anyone to ask for help and his float would have been starving and dehydrated. This would lead to arguments and Kiburi pushing his friends away…eventually, for good

-Mzingo would have tried to rule the Outlands, but no one, except for his parliament, would listen to him. Not even the hyenas. This would make him give up and flee the lands in search for a better life, leaving the animals they raised to fend for themselves without their wisdom

-The skinks would have stayed cold and bitter about Scar and Ushari’s deaths. If not for Jasiri’s idea to reform, all they’d be to the rest of Africa was another food option, since they wouldn’t meet Kenge or Sumu to protect them

-Speaking of Kenge and Sumu, she’s been their therapist. She listens to their problems and she’s taught them that not everyone is bad. Without her rule, the two wouldn’t have pushed themselves to be better animals and instead be all alone and bitter, the both of them dying emotionally AND physically

It could be the same for Kiburi as well. Maybe he’s tired of messing up or he doesn’t believe that he could really change because of all the bad things he’s done. But believe it or not, he’s done a lot of good things without even realizing it and the world would kind of suck if he had never been born:

-Piga would have never genuinely smiled or have his spirits lifted, not even with Ucheshi. Kiburi is his pride and joy and had he never existed, Piga simply wouldn’t have been happy. And to add on, Piga would be much harder on his kids, with Ucheshi being effected the most

-Ucheshi may be the exact opposite of Kiburi and he HAS said things like “How are we related?”. But he has never EVER encouraged her to change who she was. Kiburi is the reason she’s so happy and free, because he let her be herself. Piga wasn’t like that. Under his rules, she would have lost her spirit and become cold and untrustworthy, making others cry instead of laugh. Not to mention, Kiburi played a role in her and Makuu’s love story. His banishment and their argument was essentially the cause of them falling on love, with Makuu comforting Ucheshi and Ucheshi making Makuu laugh, which made him develop feelings for her and show his tender side. Have I mentioned how close they are? Like Kiburi is genuinely a good brother to her

-Tamka wouldn’t be accepted for who he is. Everyone judged him, everyone dismissed him for lacking intelligence. But not Kiburi. Kiburi was the first friend Tamka ever made and who didn’t seem to judge him, thus why he remained loyal. Tamka wouldn’t have anyone to really depend on without him

-Oh Nduli….poor poor Nduli. His life would have been miserable if they never met. Kiburi was the one Nduli really looked up to, the one who was always so nice and welcoming when he first hatched. It was Kiburi who convinced Piga to take him in after Kinywa died, it was Kiburi who cared for him most of his life, and it was Kiburi who promised that nothing bad was going to happen to him no matter what. Who knows what would happen to him without the best croc in his eyes?

-Neema wouldn’t have anyone to appreciate his intelligence. Sure, he’d follow Makuu and he���d still live in the Pridelands with Tamka and Nduli, but he wouldn’t be happy about it. He always really sided with Kiburi about a lot of things, he just kept quiet about it.

-If you think about it, Kiburi’s the reason Makuu turned out to be such a great leader. As hatchlings, Kiburi was Makuu’s greatest support system ever since he said he wanted to be the next leader. Makuu beating Kiburi proved to be good sparring practice and he used those skills to win the mashindano. Even after the friendship ended, he still inadvertently helped Makuu grow, with him repeatedly defeating Kiburi proving his development to the members that were still wary of the new change in leadership.

-Hodari would have never joined Makuu’s float. Hodari helped Makuu defeat Kiburi with a hurt leg and that got him to be an honorary crocodile. Without him, the rejection would have destroyed his lively, happy-go-lucky personality over time with broken dreams

-Even though it was Makuu who used to idolize Pua, not even he took some of his lessons to heart like Kiburi did. It’s subtle, but Pua can tell when someone listens to his advice and he appreciates that. It’s the little things that keep Pua going :)

-Kiburi didn’t think anything of it, but calling Kenge “big” did something to the lizard. The only other animals who did that were ones (mostly reptiles) that were smaller than him, but to have someone bigger say it so casually, it hit different. For the first time, Kenge felt truly validated. He got to be seen as an equal and that wouldn’t have been possible if Kiburi didn’t exist

-Hukumu would have kept thinking that bad/evil animals don’t change for the better, but when she met Kiburi…that changed. It was understandably hard for her to accept that her love wasn’t…the best crocodile, but he proved that he changed since then

-Wakali’s simple. Without a father to adopt and love her, she wouldn’t be alive

-Oh and Hatari would still be alive and have eventually killed all the crocodiles in the Pride Lands. His crocodile-hating reign of terror wouldn’t have ended if Kiburi wasn’t there to stop him. Not to mention the effect the lack of crocodiles would have in the circle of life

-If there’s one good thing that Kiburi is constantly doing, it’s how he ALWAYS has his friends’ backs. How he’s so protective over them and deep down, just wants everyone to be treated right. Before the dry season, all of his intentions were good. He just went about it via the crocodile way bc that’s how he was raised

Jasiri ends up getting an appreciation party for all the stuff she goes through and Kiburi comes back feeling more grateful about where he is now

[spotty-bee]

Hazbin Hotel Headcannon

I've been thinking a lot about Adam, Lute, Vaggie and the exorcists. How they all work and everything that we've learned over the course of the show about them. After looking over the pictures of them without their masks and all the back dealings with heaven I was kinda starting to think...

What if their all related?

Adam and Vaggie have the same skin colour. Lute has Adam's nose. They all have golden pupils (Though Vaggie's sclera is red, many have head cannoned that being from living in hell.) Vaggie and Lute both have white hair. Theres a lot of similarities between these characters physically and while that can be due to the art style, I do start to wonder.

However WHY would Lute , Vaggie and possibly all the exorcists be Adam's daughters? Well it starts to make sense when you remember that Sera wanted to keep the Exterminations under wraps. If you have Heaven Born or Saint (Dead humans who got into Heaven) warriors doing the exterminations, word would eventually get out. These people have lives outside of their work and all it would take is talking to a spouse or one of them feeling guilty before news spreads. IF you have warriors who's entire life was Exterminations, then they would A- be less likely to tell anyone and B- Be less likely to feel guilty if they weren't taught anything else.

As for where all these woman came from, my guess would be cloning. We know for a FACT that Heaven has Science.

A good way to get warriors that won't have outside influence/ loose lips is if they don't have any parents that will be wondering whats going on. Cloning would also ensure that warriors will walk off the assembly line fully grown and ready to train. Adam likely used his DNA and then mixed it with donated DNA from other Heavenly Residents . All he then had to do was train his army.

OF course this opens up some rather dark things to consider. There are at least 100 Exterminators. All of them are female. The likelihood of that happening by happenstance is extremely low. Adam had to have chosen to only have woman in his army, and when you factor in Adam's misogynist, narcissistic attitude, that dose not paint a pretty picture. We also need to consider that Adam was left to train/educate these woman with almost no outside interference. Sera made it clear she wanted as little to do with the Extermination business as possible and she maybe one of the few who knew about the army's creation. IN FACT I know she had nothing to do with the army because, apparently, Adam got to name these girls and nobody, and I mean NOBODY, stopped him from naming Vaggie after female anatomy. (I wouldn't be surprised if Vaggie is a nickname and she's actually just named Vagina.)

They seem to have lived a life of constant training and battle. Its also heavily implied that Vaggie (and Lute to a lesser extent) were taught to view themselves as disposable. Worthless if they didn't have someone to serve. We see it when Vaggie tries to lead the trust exercises, when she beats herself up for not making a proper commercial for the hotel, in fact she seems to have little personal life unless its training or Charlie is involved. Lute herself rips off her own arm just to try and help Adam. If Adam did raise/train them, then these are some pretty bad signs.

These are just some things I was thinking about looking over the show. I am also not making this to bash anyone who ships Adam and Lute. This is all speculation and personal interpretation. I've just never felt anything romantic between Lute and Adam, but they were clearly close. I took that last, tearful goodbye in the finally as a distant, estranged Father- Daughter relationship.

Anyway, what do you think? Its highly unlikely this is true, but could make for a fun, dark fan fiction or Au!

[come-away-with-me87]

The Art of Love Chapter 5

Chapter 4 here

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"Please, have a seat," as you motioned to the seat on the other side of your desk.  Shouta and you both sat down in your respective seats, and he looked around your desk for a moment.  It was primarily scattered with the kids' drawings, but over to the side, there was a picture of you and Kento from your engagement photoshoot.  Even though he's been gone for years, you never had the heart to take it down.  You had told yourself it was a reminder of the decision you had made back at his funeral, but now you were having complicated feelings about everything.

"Is that you and your husband?" Shouta asked, finally speaking up first.  "Oh...oh. That's...that was my fi-fiance, Kento. He passed away a few years ago."  Shouta looked over at you, "I see. I'm sorry."  You looked over at the picture for a moment, then looked back over at Shouta, "thank you."  You two sat there in an awkward silence for another moment, until you said to Shouta, "so, you wanted to tell me about Eri's past and why she's here?"  His shoulders seemed to relax a little bit after the awkwardness, simply replying, "yes."  

Shouta then went on to explain everything from the beginning.  For years, she was used and abused as an experiment to make a Quirk-Destroying drug by the leader of the Shie Hassaikai, Overhaul.  "Her body was destroyed then restored over and over again by Overhaul's Quirk," Shouta said with venom in his voice.  He then went on to explain how he Shie Hassaikai joined forces with the League of Villains, which is when the rescue plan was put in order by a pro-hero named Sir Nighteye.  After much grief and loss, Mirio and a boy named Izuku Midoriya were finally able to rescue Eri, with Mirio losing his Quirk in the process.

"Eri lived a very fearful and secluded life," Shouta stated.  "We never saw her smile for the first time until long after she was rescued, when Mirio took her to the U.A. School Festival.  I've been working with her since then on maintaining her Quirk.  Overall, she shows to be better, but I thought this class could also, in a way, provide a form of therapy to her that the U.A. can't."  You sat there and just looked at Shouta with tears in your eyes; what a heartbreaking situation for a young girl to go through.  You blinked back your tears, trying to remain professional, and brought out some of Eri's artwork.

You slid her self-portrait across the desk to Shouta stating, "this is one that has concerned me the most so far."  Shouta picked up the drawing from the desk and observed it.  "Interesting..." you heard him say for the second time now.  "It's difficult to tell, but this looks like the outfit she was in when she was being held captive in. She had on a tan dress and was covered in bandages."  He put the drawing back down and you automatically looked down at it, saying "it seems she still views herself that way for some reason."  "I agree," Shouta replied, "I'll talk with her about it tonight after we're done training."  

"What exactly are you training her on, if you don't mind my asking?"  He looked up at you thoughtfully for a moment, "I'm helping her train on controlling her Quirk since she was never taught how to. She's shown tremendous progress so far, but still has a ways to go."  You smiled at him in response, "you're pretty remarkable, you know that? You spend your days teaching and training students on becoming heroes, then you spend your evenings training Eri. It takes a pretty special person to do something like that."  Shouta slightly blushed and looked down at his lap, quietly saying, "it's not a big deal."  You just smiled again in response.

He looked back up at you, "the colors she chose for her mandala..." he trailed off, "I believe she associates those colors with Overhaul," to which he explained what Overhaul's outfit consisted of.  "Ah, it makes sense why you said it was interesting when you first saw it. I promise, I will do my best to continue working with Eri through her trauma, and help her become the best version of herself," you said with confidence to Shouta.  "It seems like she is also in excellent hands with everyone at the U.A., so between that and her art therapy, I'm confident that she'll heal."  

It was Shouta's turn to smile at you, "thank you for taking her into your class, Y/N. She thinks very highly of you, saying you're very kind to her. I can tell you're a warm person, and I appreciate you now being a part of not only her healing process, but her life."  Now it was your turn to blush.  "Listen, I don't normally do this, but I would like to give you my personal phone number in case you ever need me for anything...for Eri, of course."  You wrote your phone number down on a piece of paper, and slid it across the desk to him.  "Thank you, Y/N, I appreciate that. I'll give my number as well, in case something happens in the classroom or you're concerned about anything...regarding Eri."

He ripped off a small piece of paper from the one you gave him, wrote his number down on it, and slid it back across the desk to you.  "Well, I better get back to the campus. I have training with Eri and I also have papers to grade. Thank you for taking the time out of your schedule to talk to me."  You smiled over at him, "it was my pleasure."  You both got up at the same time, and you walked him over to the door.  "Thank you, Shouta, for everything you've been doing for Eri; I can tell you've been such a positive influence in her life; she's lucky to have someone like you."  He smiled at you once more, said goodbye, then took his leave.  You couldn't help but stand there and stare at him walking away.

You went back to your desk, picked up the piece of paper with Shouta's number on it, and plugged his number into your cell phone.  You then noticed yourself smiling the whole while.  After you finished putting his name and number in your contacts list, you put your phone down, and took a deep breath.  Sure, Shouta had some sort of effect over you that you couldn't explain, but you only have his phone number for Eri's sake.  That was all.  At least, that's what you told yourself, as you continued to smile down at Shouta's name in your contacts list.

******

To be continued...

******

Tag list: @lili-pond ; @jaguarthecat ; @big-denki-energy ; @ivydoesit23

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

Please tell me about your ocs!! IM HUNGRY GRRR

helloow omg ! im so honored you want to know more about my ocs aaahhh!! :D my moot @kovu-bunnbunn also wanted to know more so i figured i could do it now !!

i have a bunch of ocs but I’ll just talk about my main oc ryoko right now !!

her full name is ryoko ‘007’ aizawa. I’ll explain the 007 in a minute !! she’s aizawa’s adoptive daughter.

her parents (her dad more specifically, her mom was more of a bystander) are both from very wealthy families and merged. Her parents had an arranged marriage and after some chatter to get to know each other they’re conversations take a little bit of a turn..and inbetween bonding about their favorite movies oop! A lil comment about how the world would he better off without heroes..oh you think so too ? Well look at that, we have so much in common!! long story short they both decide that the want to create something that will be able to take down all might and the entirety of hero society and it’s restrictions,,and I’m pretty sure you can guess what that something was ! nine months later ryoko is born yipeee…!

during her entire pregnancy ryokos mom went through some quirk experiments (sponsored by doctor garaki 👍) because they knew that with both their quirks alone they wouldn’t be able to create a super weapon. (ryokos dad has an overhaul type quirk, and her mom has a healing sort of quirk) so they did some experiments hoping something would change in the womb, and when she was born the kept on doing experiments until she started manifesting a quirk w no attributes from her either of her parents and manifested a fully different quirk than she was originally meant to have,

since she had those experiments done ryokos body adapted to be able to handle her quirk, but it’s not perfect unfortunately.

heres a simple little chart of how it works ! (BTW I DO NOT DRAW LIKE THIS ANYMORE THIS IS OOOOLLLLDD😭😭😭😭)

her quirk is a lot like neijires as in she uses her own energy and converts it into power ! The amount she uses shows in her hair :3 ryoko tho, unlike neijire can do multiple things from sending blasts, to powering herself up to make parts of her body stronger, to making it hard objects like stepping stones she uses to navigate and weapons like dual swords or chains to restrain ppl !! she can also drain other peoples energy (and from her surroundings, but thats only in 100% mode ! ) because of the fact that her body had been modified, ryoko can carry more energy into herself than regular people which is why she can drain energy without any major drawback to a certain extent ! However, her drawbacks are way more severe, overusing her quirks makes her sleepy and drowsy, it gives her nosebleeds and very worse case scenario if she were to have too little or too much energy she could die :0 !!

(ALSO !! I lil extra tidbit: ryoko is capable of sensing peoples energy’s if she concentrates hard enough, it works better if shes seen them before, but she can sense all the energy in humans in her surroundings or if she has a picture, tho it’s slightly weaker and is limited to one person at a time. This is a form of remote viewing that i gave her bc of my obsession w stranger things i had !!😭)

its a pretty powerful quirk that her parents and other scientists knew they could use well, but unfortunately for them ryoko ended up liking heroes (she was barely educated, so she had no idea that she felt admiration for heroes and especially all might, she was alsovaguely aware that she was taught to do the wrong things, because she’d be forced to use her quirk on robots/ small animals in some cases.)

her parents weren’t supposed to feel any affection towards her so they decide to just give her a code name 007 :D which i realized a little too late was the same as james bond..woops😭

anyways fast forward to the biggg “earthquake” incident, shes rescued by a group of heroes, eraser head included :D unfortunately shes detained in tartarus since her being in a constant state of panick set her quirk off and she couldn’t stay in a regular hospital so ryoko has canonically been to tartarus as a inmate at the age of 4 😭! Oh forgot to mention this, but ryoko got her quirk veryy early due to the experiments done before her birth and after.

since ryoko cant control her quirk an aizawa can cancel them, they’re a pretty good matchup !! Fast forward some more and shes living with him ! he adopts her and lets her go to school, where she meets izu n katsuki and they quickly become friends because. Of COURSE. My main ocxcanon ship is a CHILDHOOD FRIENDS TO LOVERS ONEEE😭😭😭😭will i ever stop. raise your hand if you’ve ever seen that one comin

lmk if you want to know more about her or other ocs ! I didn’t wanna ramble TOOO much so this is all the basic info!! plus some drawing of her

two of them r completely credited to horikoshi cus i used ochaco n hagakure as a base !! I accidentally have two in normal mode and two in 100% or overdrive mode as she calls it (tho one of them is a soul eater au :3) ! Both made by me :3

Much luvvv xxxx!!! And thank you Sooo much for your ask again💗💗💗💗