#she does not get to be forgiven and therefore forget

[lucy-moderatz]

Are you through?

[emwallas176]

Episode 4x09 of Smallville was genuinely so confusing. Not only was the cold open so traumatizing but then the moral gymnastics that happens for the rest of the episode (and onward) is so confounding.

So the whole premise of the episode is that Lex sleeps around so much that he can’t even remember the names and faces of the women he sleeps with. Strange and concerning on multiple levels. Even if this was completely in character (which I don’t think it is), it is still highly concerning to forget the names and faces of people you’ve been intimate with. I think they said 13 women in the last year. While that’s not a low number, I don’t think it’s high enough to cause such forgetfulness. Therefore it almost seems to imply that there’s a level of disassociation that happens on Lex’s part during the experience (you can’t form new memories if you weren’t really paying attention when they happened). This theory is also backed up by the fact that Lex admits at the end of the episode that he has suicidal thoughts, and (very) unattached sex could be a negative coping mechanism for these dark emotions. As we can see at the start of the episode, Lex looks sad and completely alone at the event. And immediately after that he jumps into bed with someone. There’s clearly a connection there (at least in my mind).

All of the above, however, is not what confuses me. It’s the other characters that I don’t understand. First you have Clark who comes in (as seems to be becoming his pattern) guns blazing and accusatory. Of course this might be warranted seeing as Lex has been quite soundly framed for murder but I digress. During their talk and with what he finds out later, Clark gets very up in arms about Lex having sex with a lot of women. Despite whether this is right or wrong of him to do, it makes absolutely no sense for why it would drive Clark into LIONEL’S arms. Especially bc Lionel admits later on that Lex learned the behavior (sleeping with women and leaving them with a pair of diamond earrings) from Lionel himself?? Like it’s bad and dishonest if Lex does it but apparently makes Lionel trustworthy?? I’m confused. Also! Let’s not forget the fact that Lionel slept with another woman while his wife was DYING! But sure, Lex is the sexually deviant one. Sure.

Also, I feel like there is a lot of disconnect between how Lex and Alicia (in later episodes) are treated. Like Lex sleeps with women (consensually) and almost gets killed by one of them and Clark tells him that he doesn’t know if he can trust him anymore. Alicia forces Clark to marry her and almost forces him to have sex with her (read: non-consensual!) and the next episode she and Clark are dating again. Also, Lex gets framed for murder and when he’s found innocent, Clark rescues him, yes, but at the end of the day he still doesn’t trust Lex. Alicia gets framed for murder and is found innocent (and dies, unfortunately (seriously that was such a shocking death what the hell Smallville?!)) and Clark feels guilty and regretful and tells his parents he wishes he believed her sooner. Now I get that these two situations aren’t quite the same but the different reactions that Clark and the other characters have feel more like the writers playing into future roles (Lex is the villain, yada, yada) rather than actually looking at the characters as they are now.

I think I would have enjoyed the episode more if I’d understood what it was trying to say. Are you trying to say that Lex is “showing a different, darker side of himself” by not caring about the women he sleeps with? Okay then why is it okay for Lionel to do. Are you trying to say that sex in general is bad? Then why have Alicia be forgiven? Why have Lana trying to loose her virginity to Jason? In the end, the episode just left me feeling really frustrated bc I felt like there was something I was supposed to get but I just didn’t get it.

[justmenoworries]

"You just hate that Catra got a redemption arc!"

Wrong.

I hate that Catra got a bad redemption arc. Where everyone is just suddenly cool with her because she gave a very unconvincing and very unspecific apololgy. Once.

S1-4 actually did a good job of setting it up. It's made clear multiple times that, yes, while Catra did have a shitty childhood and most of her issues can be chalked up to Shadow Weaver being a horrible mother, it still doesn't mean she's automatically in the right. Both the narrative and the characters contiuously call Catra out on her actions and on her insistence that everything bad she does is actually someone else's fault. Adora literally gets a whole-ass speech in the s3 finale where she tells Catra that, no, the bad things Catra has done and does aren't on Adora, or Hordak, or even Shadow Weaver - it's on Catra. It's always been on Catra. She doesn't get to pretend to be a victim. She made her choice. And she has to live with that. S4 has Double Trouble repeat those exact same points word for word.

S5 is where Stevenson completely fumbled it. Because starting with s5, Catra is suddenly absolved of the most important thing in a redemption arc: Taking accountability.

"But Celty," I hear you say, "Catra does take accountability! She apologizes to the people she's hurt! She says she's working on her anger issues!"

Yeah, one measly "uwu I'm sowwy" isn't enough to make up for, let's see: kidnapping, torture, attemtped murder, actual murder, attemtpted genocide, actual genocide and years upon years of physical and emotional abuse.

Two characters in the cast react to Catra suddenly showing up in Camp Good Guy like they should: Frosta and Netossa. And both are immediately convinced that Catra is actually nice now, because Adora said so and so all is forgiven. No need for Catra to actually work to earn these people's trust. No reason to elaborate on how complicated Catra's sheer presence must make everything, because how are the Princesses supposed to feel about suddenly having to work with the ex-leader of the Horde? The woman who took an active part in attacking and destroying their kingdoms?

Other SPOP crits have pointed this out, but it's very convenient that both Scorpia and Mermista, two people Catra has hurt in a far more personal manner, (the destruction of Salineas and the continued abuse toward Scorpia) are chipped and therefor absent from the Good Guy team once Catra and the Best Friend Squad return to Etheria. Once again, Catra is absolved of having to put any work into redeeming herself. Even when everyone unites in the finale, Catra doesn't get to apologize to Scorpia because Scorpia forgets all her character development from s4 and just hugs Catra like nothing bad ever happened between them. Mermista meanwhile is stuck making a joke about Hordak just being let off the hook for war crimes, which is doubly ironic because Catra is right fucking there being portrayed as an uwu poor kitty-cat. We don't get to see how Mermista feels about the woman who destroyed her homeland suddenly being acquitted because she's She-Ra's girlfriend now. Let's not even start with the non-reaction Entrapta has to seeing Catra again. Catra, who Entrapta genuinely believed was her friend, and who not only had her shipped off to Beast Island and, in her mind, certain death, but also let Hordak, who Entrapta had a bond with, believe that Entrapta betrayed and abandoned him. Gentle reminder that Entrapta was so heartbroken about the fact that she really was abandoned on Beast Island by everyone that she started to succumb to the signal in an instant and would have actually died if Bow hadn't snapped her out of it with her hyperfixation. Gentle reminder that Entrapta is capable of holding a grudge, as in s3 she calls Adora out for seemingly having left her behind in the Fright Zone. But because it's Catra, suddenly Entrapta magically doesn't mind having to tend to the woman who shocked her unconscious and had her shipped off to a violent death.

Oh and let's not forget the elephant in the room: Not once, in the entirety of s5 does Catra ever take responsibility for killing Angella. Glimmer suddenly forgets all about Catra being the one who indirectly murdered Angella. She doesn't bring it up once and instead is slowly browbeaten into making nice with Catra through solitary confinement. The Glimmer/Catra friendship in s5 is so forced and so out of nowhere. Bow also forgets that Catra kidnapped him and his best friend/love interest to the Fright Zone and that because of her, Glimmer was suffering from her powers going haywire for quite a while, which, may I remind you, left her with spasms painful enough to have her writhing on the floor unable to move. What is Bow's reaction to Catra when she joins the team? To gush about how cute her sneeze is. I hate it here.

As for the whole "she's working on herself" - no she isn't.

S5 Catra is the exact same person as s1-3 Catra. Only now she gets away with her bs because the writers decided she's a good guy now.

S5 Catra is still a violent, self-serving, abusive asshole. She still blames others for her fuck-ups, still resorts to verbal and physical abuse to deal with her emotions, still would rather have the entire world destroyed than have Adora's world not revolve solely around her. Honestly, Catra saying that she always loved Adora is laughable, because like an episode earlier she left Adora in the woods, crying her eyes out and begging for Catra to stay, during possibly the hardest time of Adora's life. "But she came back!1!!" She came back after, once again, making Adora feel like absolute shit for trying to save people. Not to mention one of the reasons Adora was so deadset on stopping Horde Prime, even at the cost of her own life, was that Catra literally begged her to. Catra told Adora that if Horde Prime wasn't stopped, they'd all be looking toward a fate worse than death. Then suddenly towards the finale, Catra changes her tune and whines that Adora has decided to take the Heart, making it out like Adora just loves playing hero, when the show literally spells it out that Adora is the only one who can do this. Everyone else would literally die if they took the Heart. Adora/She-Ra is the last hope Etheria, no, the universe has at this point. Again, that's not just in Adora's head, that's something the plot itself confirms over and over again. But we're still supposed to side with Catra when she pushes Adora into the dirt and victim-blames her.

[crossedsabers10s]

Hi! just read charnal house floor and adored it-- the dramatic irony, the tension, the rising horror; liz calling damon young which is so terrible because she's right he always will be and yet he absolutely isn't.... art.

I did want to ask, how do you think something similar would go down when they are closer, when liz knows damon's a vampire, when they are both a bit more traumatized, when liz has once tortured damon herself and he's forgiven her that?? like if it were around season 3 or so. I ask mostly because I just really love it when people feel sorry for damon shjddk anyway you're an amazing writer and happy new year !

fjkl;adfdsalfkj thank you!

hm, later in the show when they're friends/she knows? Well, the same story line (her showing him the storage room, perhaps even as a show of reconciliation? her showing a vampire the secret stuff?) relies on Liz forgetting she knows about Augustine or just not considering it important so it remains as status quo until that moment and Damon finds out. He is. Less likely to attack her? Probably--tho we all know how Damon deals with sudden strong emotions-- and she'd realize that this is personal to him, even making the leap that he was involved w Augustine at one point. Which would possibly result in her prying a few horrific details out of him--he's sharing them to shock her into not asking more, she's staying calm and treating him like a victim, falling back on her training, which he does notice and switches to telling her he already took revenge, bc he wants her to see him as villain instead of victim, maybe which spawns her researching the Whitmore family and all of his victims perhaps even preventing him from killing Aaron's aunt bc she's like 'does it make you feel better? does revenge help? this woman never hurt you.' and he's all 'it makes me feel better' but then through the power of friendship he's forced to confront the fact that revenge is ultimately empty/isn't going to bring back Enzo or absolve Damon's role in his 'death' and Liz convinces him that tearing apart the organization and dragging the non-supernatural shady shit to light is a better vengeance than random murder of people who are like. Innocent of the original crime and Dr. Whitmore isn't even alive to care that his family is being hunted down. Tearing down his legacy tho? the college and program and all that? Ruining his name and memory? That's where it's at. So they do that, discover Enzo, and bam. Of course, then Liz has to convince Enzo not to kill Aaron/Aaron's aunt. She could probably call them even for her getting the ball rolling on his rescue as long as he doesn't go after them and instead focus on Wes. They drag Enzo back to Mystic and suddenly, amongst the Original Plotline, they have to deal with Damon's... ex? friend? ex friend? no one is sure. Liz and Damon are keeping quiet. Enzo is too busy being free to answer questions.

OR

she now knows vampires feel and think as people do, remembers Augustine exists and guiltily goes out of her way to check in with them--maybe to convince herself that the vampire they have is a bad one and therefore deserves it? and instead finds. Well. Enzo. when she tries to dig further, she's either shut down or they try to silence her. So she starts... going about it the legal way. Do you have a permit for that? Oh hey I noticed you ordered a bunch of medical supplies. Where did that go? Throws the book at them until they Do Something about it and gets kidnapped so Augustine can figure out why she's making trouble/maybe they even found out about Caroline and threatened her. Liz, drawing her gun: Frankenstein wannabes say what? Whatever, point is, she rescues Enzo, brings him back to Mystic and goes hey maybe I should ask Damon for help? Maybe this guy would feel more comfortable with another vampire. Damon, walking into the room because Liz asked him to help her with something: this isn't the last thing i expected but only because i didn't expect it at all. Enzo: *kill bill sirens*

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

Meaningless Suffering ≠ Consequences: An SPOP Rant Analysis

so one huge argument i've seen from SPOP fans, when it comes to Catra's redemption is that “she got tortured and mind controlled by Horde Prime. she almost died at his hands. therefore, she faced the consequences of her actions.”

now.. could this be considered a consequence of her actions? the important question here is: why did Catra get punished by Prime? for going against his rules and freeing Glimmer. she got punished for doing one good thing. this was the consequence of her doing something right. if anything, she would be more discouraged to do good in the future, because the first time she does something good, she almost gets murdered for it.

but i digress. i've seen this trope be used with quite a few characters in media. the other example of this i want to talk about is Marcy from Amphibia. (spoilers for Amphibia below)

in the s2 finale, Marcy is revealed to have stranded her friends Anne and Sasha on Amphibia on purpose, because she didn't want to be alone. while this wasn't as bad as any of the shit that Catra pulled, it was still a fucked up thing to do. Marcy deliberately took Anne and Sasha away from their home and their parents, for her own selfish reasons.

like Catra, Marcy also has abandonment issues. her parents had informed her that they had to move and Marcy was terrified at the idea of having to leave Anne and Sasha behind. but that was still not an excuse for what she did.

not long after her secret was exposed, Marcy gets stabbed by King Andrias while trying to escape Amphibia. she doesn't die, of course, it's still a kid's show.

but to make things worse, she gets possessed by the Core later on, which is shown to be an extremely painful and traumatizing process (which they barely touch upon later). and then they show in a flashback that Anne and Sasha used to ignore Marcy and make her feel lonely, when this was not touched upon earlier in the series. in fact, Anne was shown to be very caring and attentive to Marcy up until this episode.

at this point, it's clear that the writers are trying to make the viewers feel sorry for Marcy. if they keep adding reasons why she's so miserable and traumatized, maybe the viewers would forget what she did to Anne and Sasha. right?

there is a small scene in s3 where Sasha questions why she should forgive Marcy, but it is quickly fixed by Anne telling Sasha that she should forgive Marcy. there's also a moment of realization for Marcy but even that is done in such a cliché and lighthearted manner, where the severity of her actions aren't addressed. and that's it. Marcy is rescued, she apologizes, and is immediately forgiven.

but then again, like SPOP, the last season of Amphibia was trashfire. i refuse to believe that people genuinely liked that season, it was so badly written and ruined everything that was set up prior to it.

anyway, let's come back to SPOP. it's clear that the writers of SPOP were also trying to do the same thing. put poor catgirl through the wringer, have her almost die and come back to life and voila! she is absolved of all her crimes.

for those of you who are still not convinced, let me try to make a real world comparison. let's just say i'm someone who bullies or abuses people. one day while getting home from school/work, i get hit by a car. i get grievously injured and go through a lot of pain. heck, maybe it even leaves some kind of permanent disability or injury.

is that a punishment for my actions? you can call it karma, but let's be real, karma doesn't exist. it's just a coincidence. and you bet i'm not going to wake up in the hospital thinking “this must be my punishment for abusing people”. if i really am an abuser who has no remorse for my actions, a random accident isn't going to change my mind.

and that's what happened with Catra too. she didn't consider Horde Prime's torture as a consequence of her actions. if anything, she used that as an excuse to mistreat Adora and the others even more. it's clear that she pitied herself for what happened. and everyone else pitied her, including the audience.

imagine if the good redemption arcs were written this way. imagine if, instead of working through his issues and facing actual consequences of his actions, Zuko was just tortured and traumatized even more by Ozai, and the Gaang just forgave him because they felt bad for him. yeah, people wouldn't be praising his arc anymore. or they would, who knows. i know i wouldn't be praising his arc.

because this is not the way to redeem a villain. the only way to redeem a villain is to have them face consequences of their actions and work for forgiveness. to show them consistently trying to make up for what they did and trying to be a better person, not because they want to be forgiven or accepted by the heroes, but because it's the right thing to do.

[alicent-vi-britannia]

Small analysis of "Nunnally"

Today I bring you one of my favorite instrumental pieces from the Code Geass soundtrack: Nunnally's theme. And, by the way, I'll give you a little analysis about it. I was going to hold out until I analyzed Lelouch and Kallen's kiss scene, but whatever. So here is a preview of that analysis.

I think Nunnally's theme is the love theme of the series. Why? Because the series associated Nunnally with love in episode 11 of R2, "The Power of the Passions." At that time a conversation takes place between Lelouch and Shirley about love. The orange-haired girl claims that love is a powerful force that moves people to do anything, from the stupidest to the impossible, and she lists several examples to support her premise. Lelouch is convinced by her argument, when he realizes that his love for Nunnally has filled him with power. Therefore, Nunnally is the first person that Lelouch professed sincere and enormous love for, and therefore, Nunnally represents love from Lelouch's point of view.

An example of this is in episode 24 when Nina and Lelouch speak for the last time. Why does it ring at that moment? Because they are both talking about Euphemia. Nina is helping her worst enemy out of love for Euphy, both to see the princess' wish of a world where everyone is happy come true and to give justice to her murder since Lelouch intends to pay for his crime with the Zero Requiem. Don't forget that Euphemia is the reason Nina is fighting.

The music doesn't stop at that point and extends until the last conversation between Lelouch and C.C. Why? Because C.C. feels remorse for giving Geass to Lelouch. Geass changed his entire life and now he has to face the person he has loved most in his life, his own sister, and give his life for humanity and to pay for his sins. He has thousands of reasons to hate her. She used him, betrayed him, and lied to him for almost the entire series. But Lelouch has forgiven her everything because the witch has become an important person to him. In addition to that Lelouch takes full responsibility for having used the cursed gift she gave him and, rather, thanks her. It's a perfect display of love and this is what will motivate C.C. to live in the new world.

Above all, this theme is especially remembered because it was played when Lelouch and Kallen kiss and it is coincidentally the first time it is heard in the entire series. A few moments before, Kallen asks Lelouch what she meant to him and why he said "Kallen, you have to live" in front of the firing squad, to which Lelouch remains silent and Kallen acts by planting a kiss on him that Lelouch does not hesitate to accept. give the girl back. Kallen doesn't get an answer from her, but the music fills the void that Lelouch's silence leaves. Lelouch loved Kallen.

Why don't I say it's a "romance" theme? I'm just being cautious and avoid making strong statements. Fanboys hate my interpretation of Nunnally's theme since it implies that Lelouch reciprocates Kallen's feelings. Even if they like the idea that it's a romance theme given that it plays during the conversation between Lelouch and C.C., they can't deny that it also played at the RIGHT moment Lelouch and Kallen kissed, RIGHT after she wants to clarify with him the nature of their relationship (and much more strongly).

You be the judges. Music is another element of the composition and, like any element in an audiovisual product, it has an intention.

[cbsghostsmetasandtrevor]

Maybe it depends on forgiveness and acceptance? Some of them need to forgive others, or accept that they have been hurt even if they cannot and will not forgive that hurt caused, and some of them need to be able to forgive themselves and accept that they have been hurtful towards others. Though with most it may be a mix of the two.

Molly got sucked off almost immediately I think, despite all that Elias has done to her, and when she returns we see she still deeply despises him. But she did probably not get stuck in this pain, she has learnt to hate him and still in a way move on.

It is also often shown they are aware of certain flaws, but often completely lack insight on others. Isaac for example is aware when he hurt someone, and he even fears having hurt those close to him, but does not see into his own pride which has led to him making choices that ironically led to him not getting what he wanted in the end. His need to prove he is right led to getting kicked out of the signing, and dying of dysentery.

And perhaps it is those flaws they are blind to that makes them stuck? It also lead to the question on why the Cholera ghosts are with more, while the revolutionary ghosts are only stuck with four, and only one on the Rebel’s side even, despite the change more have been killed in battle or died due to sickness. Where the cholera ghosts with a lot more, and is this just a small part of it, or do all of them share the same reason they are stuck.

An interesting chase is Chris. We are led to see him as this perfect man when we are first introduced to him, only at the moment he does die, his flaws are slowly creeping up. His lack of worry about having died is the first one, perhaps a certain toxic positivity, he clearly moves on from things quickly. He kisses Nigel, and forgets the other’s name in the same day, having found a new, more interesting thing. The fandom was hoping he would get stuck as a ghost, while possibly not completely considering there would have to be a reason for him to stay as a ghost, and now we are aware of that reason. Ironically he seems to be stuck because he moves on too quickly.

I do think it has something to do with forgiveness and acceptance for sure!

We see that with Sam's mom, specifically, but also she mentioned that one guy that forgave his wife for running off with his brother? So I think it's definitely related.

I think sometimes we may not KNOW what we need to forgive. For example, I don't think that Pete KNEW about Carol/Jerry and therefore, it ADDED to why he's staying. I think he needs to forgive himself for leaving his daughter (first) and then discovered what Carol/Jerry did and now, he has to forgive them too. (He says he has, but he brings it up enough that you know he hasn't).

With Thor, we see the same thing - he hasn't forgiven his shipmates for leaving him behind, and then, he has Bjorn to think about and I don't think he's forgiven himself for leaving him behind either.

With Trevor, I think he hasn't forgiven himself for his largely self-inflicted death (because he left Bucky behind, because he left his brother and parents behind), which only compounds when he finds out that the guys did what they did. I'm conflicted on whether or not he's actually forgiven them or if he's trying to hide his hurt the same way that he hid his true self behind being a douchey finance bro.

... I could go on with the main ghosts and why I think they're staying, but I won't because you bring up a good point -

WHY WOULD CHRIS STAY THEN? The dude literally seems so chill about his death, he easily drops Nigel and has apparently forgotten about his boyfriend (maybe they broke up?) in the timespan of a DAY.

So, maybe he hasn't accepted his death - and his death is also sort of self-inflicted, we barely knew anything about him, so maybe he has something he's holding to something we don't know?

Lastly regarding Cholera - Stuart probably needs to forgive himself for bringing it and the other probably need to forgive him for inflicting them. I would guess.

thoughts?

[rosalindthe2nd]

Coming in at number ten, and lucky to be placed so highlight quite frankly, it’s….. Sir Geraint.

Reasons:

- ok so he “Crown’d a happy life with a fair death” and died fighting for Arthur in battle which is obviously excellent

- Takes out a lot of bandits and the fight scenes are pretty cool in Geraint and Enid.

- Generous to the fair hair’d youth bringing victuals to the mowers by giving him a horse and arms, and does at least see to it that Enid gets something to eat before he worries about himself.

- Does eventually see the error of his ways and sort of apologises

- BUT is such a controlling arse to his wife. The test of making her wear her old dress to leave her father’s castle and be married seems maybe a little bit reasonable etc given his words to the Queen (who, however, I am sure would not at all have minded Enid turning up in something nice by the way) but he says “Now, therefore, do I rest, A prophet certain of my prophecy, That never shadow of mistrust can cross Between us.” Ha!

- (Though I guess at least he tries to explain to the mum why he’s not allowed her to wear the special dress her mum was so pleased to be able to give her.)

- This is such a creepy way for a man to look at a young girl FFS: “glancing all at once as keenly at her As careful robins eye the delver’s toil.”

- the opposite of Arthur in that he is over swift to believe rumours about Lancelot and Guinevere: “tho’ yet there lived no proof, nor yet was heard The world’s loud whisper breaking into storm, Not less Geraint believed it.” Why so keen to believe the worst, Geraint?

- Also assumed the worst of Enid, with zero trust in her and gets lost in obsessive controlling love to the point of being “Forgetful of his Princeton and its cares.” Arthur would never!

- I guess at least “he loved and reverenced her too much To dream she could be guilty of foul act”. but still! He is still a “wanton fool” and a “hasty judger” as, in fairness, Tennyson seems very keen to stress.

- Yniol says of Sparrow-hawk “the proud man often is the mean” which seems extremely true in relation to Geraint himself tbh. I actually prefer the sparrow hawk because at least he was young and, being forgiven by the Queen, changed and came to “loathe His crime of traitor, slowly drew himself Bright from his old dark life, and fell at last In the great battle fighting for the King.”

- Urrrghhhh, I can’t even with how awful Geraint is throughout Geraint and Enid. Paradigm of abusive control, surely. Actually quite a hard read.

- “Suffering thus he made Minutes an age”, eh? Boo bloody hoo for you, mate. Cry me a river.

- Hate him

[lilisouless]

I am going to spill some harsh truths, you are completely allowed to ignore and enjoy the scene. But i want to say why i think using it to defend the writting is actually a bad idea because it anything: it encapsulates everything wrong with season 2

Here is the thing: season 2 was very good at building scenes, while season 1 has bangers , s2 probably had the better and more memorable scenes. It has better ingridients, BUT here is the thing:

For that scenes, Two or even three female characters (and maybe one male) had to be sacrificed for the sake of a male one who ONLY got it for the sake of being the creator´s favorite.

They didn't care to link his story to Alina, either event wise to tematicalle. They were saying: "Alina is just background to the much superior Kaz"

They didn't care sacrifycing Inej (a character that, remind, actually is linked to the themes of the show) ´s villain. trauma or friendship with Nina in order to fullfil Kaz´s subplot. They were saying: Inej´s story matters less than Kaz´s , he is superior to her that´s why she must be sacrificed for him.

This is more on their ship obssesed writing than Kaz but still, Nina : a character thats actually perfecto to be the link of the crows and the main plot line is only a secondary on Kaz´s plot. They are saying: Nina´s background doesn't matter, Kaz is superior

To them, women don't matter, Kaz is better than all of them and therefore sacrificing them worths.

And i could argue Jesper got some hits but in his case is something that could have been fleshed out in the soc spinoff (and i´d argue there´s dept in it)

In fact KAZ got hit by it. The obvious preference towards him ended up affecting him too the second the scene finished. Because you have him saying "the trick is not to love anyone" yet the very same next thing he does is asking for Inej´s liberation. He is exposing his weakness in front of any person that could use it against him. They only cared that Kaz looks smart and cool, not actually be smart. It´s a sad irony that the attempt to paint Kaz as superior ends up actually hurting him too, being smart and calculating is a core Kaz trait and they sacrificed that too.

So don't get me wrong, i love that scene as well, i actually stopped niptiking the show in that momment for how invested i was , i remember saying out loud "well, i am finally seeing Kaz Brekker, where have you been?" The scene is good, i completely agree with OP that it absolutely ate. Freddy Carter (who btw i already have forgiven despite Kaz´s terrible characterization in s1) made me forget he ever was in that terrible horse show that made me wish he wasn't playing Kaz. The set up is great, everything is good.

However, the background, how we got there, who got hurt, it pretty much defines that despite his good scenes: Kaz , or better said, the obvious preference towards him at the expense of other characters is, without a shame, the VERY WORST thing that happened to Shadow and Bone. Kaz is a paradox where he is not a bad character individually but somehow he is the worst show in terms of structure because thats what happens when you have a creator´s pet. I still like him (mostly season 2, s1 was so meh and dull) but there was no reason for him to get so much attention and specially, so much things happening to hurt other characters in his favor.

In short, i believe in defending season 2 to a certain extent in certain parts (some things were obviously a set up for later things, others were pragmatic,etc) but that scene is the worst example of defending the show because it actually encapsulates everything that went wrong.

Say what you want to say about Shadow and Bone Season 2 being crap, but not a single soul can convince me that the Kaz and Pekka Rollins showdown is anything less than one of the greatest scenes in all of cinema.

[cannoli-reader]

I read your post about sexism and military stuff in WoT and your idea that the story is not sexist for it's military being all men is interesting, but what about the rest of the gender essentialism? Women are X and Men are Y and all that?

It's still a case of sexist characters, not a sexist narrative. The gender essentialism is what the characters believe. They also believe, or profess to believe, that the Forsaken were bound with the Dark One, by the Creator at the moment of Creation. The Tinkers believe that there is a Song out there that will restore the Age of Legends. The Aiel believed they were always a proud warrior nation. The narrative clearly shows us that these are not at all true. Therefore, just because a character says "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus," does not necessarily mean that it is an objective fact in the world of WoT.

Just to go over some examples, we have Thom telling Mat "Men forget and never forgive and women forgive but never forget." It's not even all that clear that Thom believes this, let alone Jordan. He's an older man responding to a 20 year old kid's inquiries about his response to a former romantic relationship. Thom's feelings about Morgase are very personal and complex and not something he is ready to get into a whole complicated discussion about, with Mat of all people.

It's pretty clear that Thom has, in fact, forgiven Morgase for her support of the Aes Sedai who abused his nephew, and he has not forgotten what precipitated their breakup. The following book, several months later, shows that he is still deeply effected by what happened to Owyn. By contrast, as we see in Morgase's stream of consciousness, it's not all that clear that she has forgiven him, for his acts of lese majeste before leaving her for good. Thom knew Morgase for years, certainly before she came to the Throne, and for the first few years of her reign, their relationship was purely professional. The romantic/sexual part of their relationship was less than a year. He has had at least one other very close relationship since then, and it was 15 years in the past anyway. It looms large in his backstory to Mat and the readers, but it's not the driving passion of Thom's life, and he really has no way to explain that to Mat without being dismissive of Morgase. So he blows him off with a bit of pseudo wisdom. But it's doubtful he really believes this and even less likely that Jordan wants the readers to believe it.

Another case that comes up is the wisdom of Marin al'Vere, a couple of times in tSR. First Egwene quotes her as saying that women want to be in love, but only with the partner of their choice, and that men need to be in love and so will easily fall for any woman who makes an effort at a relationship with them. She also gives Faile relationship advice suggesting that you control men by giving way on unimportant things and standing firm on important ones, and later, that men are basically just overgrown boys and can be tricked into compliance with sweet talk and bribery.

And this is all bullshit.

The quote about men being vulnerable to predatory women comes up in the context of Elayne's concerns about Berelain making moves on Rand. And the readers know it's not true, since Berelain's efforts to tie a string around Rand's heart (or other anatomy) failed, hard. Hell, Egwene herself tried back in the pre-series in Emond's Field and it has not lasted. The readers also know that Rand is, at this point, seriously crushing on Elayne and Min, the former of whom has done nothing to entice or entrap him, and if the latter did, she herself seems unaware of the effect it had. During the subsequent meeting between Rand, Egwene and Elayne, Egwene is almost hilariously blind to Rand's feelings for Elayne, puzzled by his reactions to her presence and oblivious to the fact that he is far more responsive to Elayne than he is to Egwene. With Faile, of course, we see the first bit of advice being repeated by Abell Cauthon to Perrin on handling women, with Perrin taking note of the similarity, and the latter advice Faile dismisses out of hand and instead persuades Perrin not by diversion and manipulation, but by straightforward explanation of her position.

The gender essentialism is something that the series only pays lip service to, and undermines in any number of places. Egwene is concerned about Talmanes figuring out what she is up to, because he is a man and men gossip excessively so he might endanger her plan ... only to learn that he figured it out from a woman gossiping. Things like this make it seem pretty clear to me that Jordan intended them to be taken with a grain of salt.

[asterssunzephyr]

I accidentally made another au

Its a lot more canon compliant and the only difference being Gem gets a proper corruption arc and the twins fight. (Colour Coordination: Fwhip moments in red, Gem moments in Purple)

Fwhips twin sword breaks and he goes to the grimlands to fix his sword and it gets darker due to him fixing it with deepslate(or obsidian?) and the redstone in the handle glows a whole lot brighter than before, but where the crack from his sword cracks glows purple due to the crystal he fused with his & Gems swords

The crystal in Gem's sword is glowing a lot less than when Fwhip gave it to her and it now has red cracks in it from the redstone Fwhip infused them with at the same time. She doesnt understand why, and if she asks, He doesnt tell her.

Fwhip fixes his sword and uses it as his main weapon, refusing to let go of his & Gems bond. Gem, while corrupt, uses her staff a whole lot more than she does her sword, therefore throwing the bond to the side.

The swords represent how close they are, as twins. Fwhip never giving his up and continuing to us it constantly shows that he was never ready to lose his sister; whereas Gem barely using it while corrupt symbolizes that she either A) Wasnt thinking clearly and abandoned the bond, or B) Completely left Fwhip behind for a moment in time.

Gem starts using her sword after shes uncorrupt, and Fwhip is using his too. The cracks symbolize that it all may be forgiven but none will be forgotten(at least by one of them). He forgives, but does not forget. She forgets, and does not have reason to ask for forgiveness for what she cannot remember.

The twins are poetically tragic, and constantly either there for the other, or nowhere to be found in a time of need. One is the count of their home kingdom, the other ran away to become a wizard, spearating them from one another until far later in life.

[crabs-brencil]

just had one hell of a night so i might have missed/misunderstood some of your points but yeah honestly i feel that overall they shied away from those potential..traits? cause it's very like, at the flip of a switch, and to an extent that's fair since yk, like shit like that *doesn't* affect 100% of your life irl but it does affect like a good 85-90% so. yeah. at least, imo.

honestly the whole thing with hank interrogating connor and 60 is kind of silly, because hank had absolutely no framework for what connor knew that 60 didn't. (and ik they "needed" to have it like that so that hank and connor could talk about cole in depth like that, but I honestly prefer the way it goes in the machine connor version where connor tries to use it against hank only to get told, "fuck you, I know who I am now". like idk it's just so much more interesting and compelling and does so much for hank's character imo.)

anyways I guess I have thoughts about this haha but in short, huge missed opportunity with connors memory loss, I think it would have been so interesting if he started forgetting his mission eventually or something. like, to find himself outside jericho and have him ask why am I here what am I doing (ik he kinda does that when he talks to Marcus/north in the hold but like he barely does, yk?? like whoever your leader is goes "do you never have any doubts" and connor either just stares him down or says smth noncommittal. would have been so much more impactful if he'd already been thinking about that and Marcus/north saying that to him is the final push he needs or smth), or hesitate before killing Marcus/north or whoever. or if at cyberlife he like, forgot who hank was and allowed 60 to kill him or something.

I do think the rooftop vertigo is well done but they should've made it stronger I think. like, make him a little bit afraid of heights.

ugh okay I have way too many thoughts about this and for Kara and Marcus as well honestly like Marcus should totally have been more affected by the coming back from the dead chapter, maybe just guilt that he feels for taking other's parts like that or take it up a notch and give him like, phantom pain/compatibility issues/maybe a limp or something.

And with Kara I think it's actually pretty well done for the most part like she is very self-sacrificial for Alice which is interesting but I wish they extended that out to luther and her other friends as well. Like the game fully relies on the player being attached to luther/the Jerry's and therefore not wanting to sacrifice them but Kara herself barely flinches. which I guess could be taken as a manifestation of just how committed she is to Alice compared to everyone else but I just think it odd for her to be *so* self-sacrificial for just one person because it's presented as a core - characteristic of hers from my understanding. also I think she shouldn't have forgiven connor. especially with how she can be kind of trigger-happy I think it would've been way more inline with her to pull a gun on connor and tell him to get the fuck away from alice.

anyways holy sh shit sorry for the long ass text omg

Connor's memory loss shit is only relevant for that cop in Public Enemy. It's like ain't a thing at all in the game, acts like nothing relevant happened but I guess it can scare some people.

They also disabled few dialogues mentioning something like this. Seems like Connor was really going to have issues with memory at least in the end but I guess ain't a thing at all. Not even the whole 60 works - they removed he not knowing who Cole is cuz...indeed doesn't make sense if he's the direct parallel of deviant Connor dying and returning as machine still remembering the whole Cole shit like nothing happened. Just means he doesn't remember anything after LCC.

I'm dumb so I really don't remember other relevant moment where it really means something. Not even dying in The Hostage; only thing that can trigger is he having a suddenly "flash" in the rooftop vertigo if Daniel shot ya. I guess Public Enemy is the only place where it's relevant.

[hacash]

season 3 predictions

(all of which are likely to be made completely redundant by 2x12 but HEY HO LET’S GO)

Sam. I think the opportunity offered to him by Edwin is too great to pass up but I just can’t imagine the show and the Richmond team without Toheeb Jimoh. Given that the writers have said they’ve planned these arcs in advance I don’t think he’d be written out for the sake of a new acting gig. Therefore because I’m selfish and desperately hoping he stars in season 3 (and could hardly pop back as a recurring character while on Edwin’s team) I could see him doing a Leslie Knope from Parks and Rec: ‘I want to leave Richmond better than when I joined it’. After what I hope will be a promotion for the team I could potentially see him asking Edwin for a year’s grace to help Richmond win the Premier League, and then he’ll happily take him up on his offer.

I’m also hoping like hell that this would be the push Rebecca needs to see there’s not going to be a future in the relationship with Sam. It’s interesting that although Bill Lawrence has openly agreed that the employee/age difference is concerning, there’s been little acknowledgement of that in the show, so I wonder if there’s going to be fallout in episode 12 in some fashion. Regardless, I think it’s time to say goodbye to Sambecca.

Keeley and Roy. I am firmly of the opinion that they ain’t breaking up any time soon. There’s no way in hell Roy has knelt down in front of Keeley so many times without it meaning something, so I am certain that next season will be the planning of the Kent-Jones wedding. 

I also have a sneaking suspicion that Keeley might end up being the next opening-shot of the season. After episode after episode of her working as Roy/Rebecca/Jamie’s emotional support, we got a tantalising glimpse into her psyche last episode: both with her uncertainties around being featured in Vanity Fair and her ambitions being shaped by her mother’s history. I love Keeley but quite frankly we haven’t had enough of her as plot - I really think/hope she might come to the fore next season.

Nate. I fully believe there’s no way in hell Nate will still be working at Richmond come the end of the season, though I can imagine him walking away in a fit of pique rather than Rebecca firing him. (Frankly, I can’t see Ted letting Rebecca do that.) I think he’ll end up joining another team - possibly with or without Darth Mannion’s help - and, although a lot of people here want this to be a devastatingly humiliating/humbling experience for Nate, I’d love to see this as an opportunity for him to genuinely grow outside the confines of Richmond (which forms way too much of his identity - and let’s be honest, can’t always hold good memories for Nate when he was literally asking his teammates not to physically harass him on a daily basis). I can definitely see someone - HigginsHigginsHiggins - giving him Sharon’s number to call before he leaves, and I like the idea that in the season break Nate could be dealing with some of his issues and returning to the Nate the Great we know and love.

However, I then think Nate will somehow end up back at Richmond. While you could argue that it would be better for Nate to make a clean break, it would honestly be a waste of Nick Mohammed’s bloody sterling acting talents to keep him away from Nelson Road for too long in season 3. I have no idea how a redemption arc here might look, but it would have to be good, and if there’s forgiveness to be offered, it should take more than the space of an episode - although I hope they don’t stretch it out too long. Rebecca and Jamie were forgiven relatively quickly; it would be a shame and a bad look if Nate’s own forgiveness journey was too disproportionately drawn out.

I’d also love to see Jamie, Colin and Isaac apologise for their season 1 bullying of Nate. Much as the bullying Nate suffered doesn’t excuse his shoddy behaviour, Nate’s own bullshit doesn’t excuse what our beloved trio pulled in season 1 - and crucially, we never saw them apologise to Nate or try to make amends. I really love apology scenes and I’d love to see Nate with some friends beyond Ted and Keeley - and that li’l scene in the Liverpool karaoke bar with Isaac, Colin and Nate doing shots together means I want more of this friendship.

Some sort of Jamie/Nate commiseration over shit dads and over-compensating for the emotional wounds they give us? Please?

More Higgins. In many ways Higgins is the emotional rock for our beloved Richmond: he’s the only one not suffering from some sort of untold trauma or struggles, and is able to live with a relationship with an imperfect father and yet be a fantastic father himself. I’d love to see a storyline where Higgins isn’t on the periphery but straight in the heart of the action, potentially adopting a Richmond boy or two along the way. 

By saying this, I mean Jamie. If we get a scene where Jamie is invited around to the Higginses for Sunday lunch I will cry. Much like Nate needs space apart from Richmond to grow and heal, Jamie needs close relationships with people who aren’t Keeley for security - mature familial relationships, and quite frankly the Higginses are the stable family dynamic Jamie needs right now. 

Why the fuck does Colin feel the need to remind himself he is not a piece of shit? Enquiring minds need to know. We’ve had episode storylines that focus on Dani, Sam, Jamie and Isaac; I just want one with Colin where I’m not emotionally devastated by the end of it, thank you Headspace.

This isn’t so much a prediction as a plea, but an entire episode where the Richmond boys are the focus. A night out in Richmond, that long-promised pillow fight, them finally taking Colin to go clothes shopping for something that isn’t a  button-up polo shirt - I honestly don’t care, I just need as much of their antics as Apple TV allows.

On a slightly more realistic note, the Himbos Greyhounds content rose significantly from season 1 to season 2, so I can see the writers carrying on with that arc. 

Ted. Fuck knows. At this point I can’t trust myself to predict Ted’s actions - I do think Nate’s going to be leaving Richmond, and so I can’t see Ted leaving as well. It would be amazing if Ted used the dubiously-written expose (c’mon Trent, you couldn’t have given Ted a head’s up or asked for a quote before the article was put online? forget dubious journalism ethics that just...seems inefficient not to approach him for a comment while you were writing the piece) as an excuse to talk more about mental health in sport. I definitely think episode 12 is going to have Richmond rally around Ted, and so I do hope the article isn’t going to drive Ted further into hiding and that he’ll be at Richmond by the time season 3 comes around.

Ted and Rebecca. I can’t have been the only one that caught that little look by Ted when Rebecca left his office in 2x11, right? Certainly the show has set up a whopper of a truth bomb for season 3, when there’s another heart to heart in Ted’s office, and though it could be anything, my little shipper heart is screaming  some sort of romantic confession of love. I don’t know, it just feels like there is a...a something between Ted and Rebecca that’s going to happen in 2x12, and I can’t help but think it’s going to lay the foundations for whatever happens in season 3 big time.

[hello-nichya-here]

Can you please explain the Azula-bias effect? It's an interesting term.

The Azula-bias is basically the bizarre belief that Azula is EVIL. No, I don't mean it in the sense of she's a villain, or an antagonist, or one of the bad guys. I mean straight up evil. Antichrist type of evil. She is not a character who did bag things, and she had no motivations, and no traits - she is evil. She's both a chaotic, insane bitch who does things for no reason, and a cruel mastermind who is ALWAYS planning something. Don't be fooled by her just casually taking a nap after lunch - it is all part of her sadistic plan to kill you and everyone you love.

The fans who have a very clear Azula-bias assume that anyone who goes against her in any is automatically right. They'll ignore the good things she did (or say it was "all part of one of her plans" despite there being no evidence for it), casually forget that other characters often joined her on her bad actions (like Zuko, Mai, Ty Lee, Iroh and Ursa all supporting the war at some point in their lives), blow small things out of proportion (like saying that her destroying a toy she was gifted, something that most kids did at some point, is in no way different from the time she cheered while Zuko was being disfigured) and they'll even claim she did things she never did (Suki didn't have a single scratch on her and didn't seem to be traumatized by her time in prison, and Azula full on told the warden to stop torturing a prisoner, but you'll still see people claiming Azula would torture prisoners all the time). They'll also either ignore the bad things that happened to her (like her mother's neglect and her father's emotional abuse) or say she deserved it all because she was "evil" since she was born.

*dresses up as psychiatrist* I classify the people who suffer from this terrible condition in 6 categories (patients can fit into more than one).

The Impressionable/Mistaken Viewer

Avatar came out almost two decades ago, and while many of us have watched the show again at least once at some point, there are still fans who only watched it when it came out. So, they obviously can't remember a lot of it, and they also misremember somethings. Considering that Azula was by far the most competent antagonist, the villain with more screentime, these people (who were likely kids when they watched it) are basing their perception of her on the most memorable and shocking moments, like her killing Aang. I have seen fans who were shocked to find out that Azula was Zuko's younger sister, and that had a very different opinion of her after rewatching the show.

The Ableist Fucker

These people took Iroh's "She's crazy and needs to go down" to heart. In their eyes, Azula stopped being a person/character the moment the finale came out and she started hallucinating. From that moment onward, Azula was no different than the classic, deeply offensive and downright dangerous stereotype of mentally ill people - nothing she does, thinks or feels is a result of anything other than "insanity". Her personality, backstory, trauma, and environment no longer exist. If you ask them to describe her to you, they'll just say she's crazy. If you ship Azula with anyone, they'll mock you and say the only ship that's good for her is Azula X Therapy.

The Incel

By far the easiest to explain. They're some dudes that see a lot of some girl that rejected them in Azula, so they harass people who like her, and then immediately start jerking off to her. 4chan is full of these guys.

The Angry Stan

They're big fans of at least one of the characters Azula ever went against (mostly Zuko and Iroh), and they HATE that she had the AUDACITY to ever defeat them in a fight and/or out-smart them. These are pretty easy to identify since they'll make sure to let EVERYONE know how much they hate Azula, and how she was actually the worst fighter/bender ever despite that being absolute bullshit. Sometimes, they hate her for "getting in the way" of their ship - how dare people prefer her for their ships over whoever their fave is?

The Victim Of Bullying/Abuse

Azula reminds them of someone who hurt them, so they let their trauma talk and preject all of their resentment over that person on to Azula. Many of them will accuse you of being an abuse apologist if you like her because they cannot separate her from their trauma.

The Preacher/Anti

By far the loudest and most annoying of the bunch, they cannot understand that people can like villains, complex characters, stories that have no morals, problematic ships, and even want a "bad guy" to turn into a "good guy". They basically think like all the people who bought into The Satanic Panic - if something is not openly, clearly, fiercely going against "the bad guys" in the very specific way they want media to do, then that media is evil and whoever likes it is also evil. In their minds, anyone who likes Azula in any reason, or so much as demonstrates even the smallest bit of sympathy for her, is a fascist, abuser, white supremacist, racist, imperialist, psychopath, narcisist, colonizer and literally any other word they want to completely miss the point of. Most of these people ignore Zuko's bad actions to pretend he is a saint, but there are few who say he is also irredemable and that the Gaang should have never forgiven him. There are lots of them everywhere, but Twitter is basically their current home and therefore hell.

[destroy-trash-boys]

waiting for people to get that any “morality” in p5 boils down to just “what makes my faves sad,  instead of trying to apply any objectivity

the only reason the fandom doesn’t really care about the other palace owners who are related to the pt being forgiven is because the game told us only the pts opinions and feelings matter. all good victims agree with them. we are never shown a single character who disagrees with their methods, doesn’t want a heart change, or who gets a heart change for their abuser, but still doesn’t fulfilled because the ethics of how “genuine” that change is is never actually explored

we forget about the rest of madarame’s pupils so yusuke’s arc can end with “guess he really loved you!”

we forget about okumura being part of the conspiracy and all the workers he worked to death, and that he’s the reason haru’s fiance is even a problem to be dealt with, because the game does and no one wants to be accused of character bashing haru to admit that she has nothing else to do in fandom besides go against akechi. we don’t see any opinions of workers families who might be happy okumura died, or who might not care if haru fixes the company because they still lost a lot because of it. okumura is only “dead father”

its okay for yusuke and haru to forgive them and want a relationship with them, so they are forgiven in the narrative. the fact that their other victims exist don’t matter. other victims who exist, who might have a different opinion on them, don’t exist and don’t matter because they would make the pt look flawed. p5 is very insistent on pushing that good abuse victims forgive their parents, because they’re still your parents. 

joker is written to conflict with haru and futaba if he wants akechi back and alive, but the third semester doesn’t say anything about maybe if other victims would have wanted okumura gone. his crimes are forgotten because haru. this is not the game missing out on haru’’s complex grief, or trying to be nuanced. they do not care. haru is written as forgiving him because the game wants you to forgive him. only the pts opinions matter and defined “objective” justice

which is why it’s interesting akechi gets the conversations of whether he should live and what that means and maybe joker is an asshole if he wants him around, but this is not considered a flaw when the game pushes the idea that forgiving abusers is nuanced and mature if they’re parents, and only villains like akechi don’t forgive. i can’t get behind any meta saying that akechi is very important for abuse victims who don’t forgive, when that point is written in game to make him a villain and he’s called immature by yusuke. look at the underlying subtext of persona 5. we’re not meant to disagree with the pts. i’d argue this writing is why akechi comes off as more evil and unforgivable than any of the adults, which is why it’s a strange choice if he’s meant to be an example of a teen victim the pts could be like, and therefore deserving of compassion.

idk guys i don’t think the only “bad abuse victim” being the one still considered the most evil character while most of the palace owners are forgotten about, considered more redeemable (maruki) or forgiven because they’re related to a pt. i don’t think that’s actually something to praise this game for. it’s not meant to make you go “kin!’, it’s meant to villainize him and it’s worth criticizing that story choice. one can do so while not liking him as a character, as i’m doing

[xemptywithyoux-old]

wait a minute, is ISABELLA 'IZZY' DANIELS still in town? i thought i saw a flash of messy hair up in a bun, sport clothes used as a fashion statement, dark eyes which could kill with one stare! last i heard they were working as a DANCE INSTRUCTOR at TBD. when it’s the gemini’s birthday on 6/4/1997. i forget that they’re IMPULSIVE and celebrate that they’re LOYAL. i hear TINY DANCER by ELTON JOHN every time i think of them.  ⌠ zendaya. 24, bisexual, cis female, she/her ⌡

       A B O U T

content warning: familiar death, depression mention

♛     a native to centralia. her parents were both cops. his father is still working, but her mother died in action about five years ago.

♛     she was three when her parents won a full paid vacation to new york city, which included tickets to see a ballet. she was not included but they loved her too much they couldn’t leave her behind, therefore, hers were the only tickets they paid for. and it was worth it because she discovered her passion in life.

♛     she never stopped dancing after that, excelling at everything she attempted. her mother was just as dedicated to it, taking time off work to driver her to and from the nearest big city to classes and competitions. it was clear she would be a star.

♛     but then her mom died when she was seventeen. it was the hardest hit for izzy, because her father would never dedicate half as much time to be with her. so she was left feeling lonely and hopeless for her ballet career, but in one last push, izzy decided to travel to new york to try out for their company.

♛     it was a mess. she was too nervous, barely slept on the train there, lost her wallet within minutes of being in the city, and after getting late to the audition, and being forgiven for being from a small town (which felt quite discriminating to her in that moment), halfway through the audition she couldn’t land a jump properly which messed up her knee. izzy tried to finish her part but it was pointless. she knew the results before even getting them.

♛     that same night she ended up in the hospital, because her knee kept swelling up. her father had to come all the way from centralia, and long story short, it took them two months to get back home, since izzy had to get through rehab.

♛     she was depressed for the longest time. it felt like ages, but it was more like two years before izzy started to get back into life. she had shut down her old friends, she wasn’t sure what she had, but she started going out for walks, train her knee to last a little longer, and try to get it back to where it was, in hopes she could get back to her dream, which is what her mother would have wanted.

♛    she felt like her entire life was over when her dream of being a professional ballet dancer disappeared from her possibilities, but in hopes to still dance at every little second she could, she took on the role of a dance teacher at the local dance studio. she loves working with little kids- they bring something in her that nobody else does. they’re so genuine, which she feels it’s something people lose as they grow older. 

        M I S C E L A N E O U S

✯      if you don’t know her, you would not know she’s a ballerina. she’s too far from the type. she’s not feminine, and would put comfort over fashion any other day.

✯      ok when there’s a big event, there’s a little bit of a change. her mother used to get her get ready, got her clothes, did her hair– it’s kind of a habit she took after her mother passed. and she loves it. but she won’t admit it. and it won’t last long before she’s driving around with the dress undone and barefoot.

✯      done with your shit, her own shit and the world’s shit. doesn’t believe shit until she sees it. and that comes with people and promises. she’s very very skeptical. will throw punches, kicks and claws if need to. not scared of getting into fights. she has, in fact.

✯      she hates her life and is always looking for excuses to get out of work, or home, or anything.

✯      loves driving around town with the windows rolled down.

✯      she works out everyday. find her running around the park or boxing her own shadow to get some stress out. very straight edge.

✯      she limps a little bit every now and then, especially when she’s overworked herself- which happens pretty often, but she tries to keep it hidden pretty well. you will never hear her complain, though. just wince.

C O N N E C T I O N S

FRIENDS FROM SCHOOL. probably boys. she liked hanging out with them more.

THE ONE BEST FRIEND. the one girl/nb friend she had back in school. they were inseparable, know everything about each other. izzy cut her off when her mom died, and they probably started getting close again in the past 2 years or so.

FIRST ANYTHING. a boy, because she was not open. this was her first boyfriend, first kiss and first time at around sixteen, barely seventeen. tres cute. also cut him off when her mom died, their break up was pretty nasty.

COWORKERS

GIRL CRUSH. who she gets very nervous around and she’s just a bunch of ghfjdjdshj. girl is pretty obvious.

BOY CRUSH. who she gets very violent at. she’ll punch his shoulder. never admit she likes him. but she does.

NEIGHBORS? ➳     i picked up your mail accidentally, opened it and realized you owe a shit ton of money to the bank? ➳     you accidentally looked into my window while i was changing? ➳     you/i caught you/me getting locked out of my place and we had coffee while someone else came home.

i have no mind rn. give anything to me.

** by me saying girl/boy, i include all sorts of genders in between, it’s more of the way they present. *** connections can also be based on chemistry, etc. just love me and love her.

@liminalintro​