#she didn’t mind killing to do so
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margaret beaufort you will always be biblically accurate alicent hightower
#margaret was very religious#margaret thought god wanted her son to rule#she didn’t mind killing to do so#LETS NOT FORGET THAT SHE WAS BEEFING WITH A BLONDE YOUNGER GIRL WHO HAD AN AFFAIR WITH HER UNCLE#her biggest enemy was a blonde#deep down she’s just an ambitious woman#margaret beaufort#alicent hightower#house of the dragon#asoiaf#aegon ii targaryen#rhaenyra targaryen#criston cole#viserys targaryen#the white queen#twq
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I loved your headcannons about inukawa, reigen and reigens sister and I would really like to see what you think would happen if mob and reigens sister met and I was wondering if you could possibly draw them :D
hello yes I accidentally made a comic after seeing this ask yesterday 😁 bro psychoanalyzed her 😨
#doctorsiren#mob psycho 100#shigeo kageyama#reigen arataka#inukawa aneko#mp100 fanart#digital art#my art#procreate#doodle requests#comic#this happens after the show which is why the ages are like that#I was gonna make their ages be 35. 28. and 14.#but then I was gonna put a whole thing about how Aneko’s son is the age that her brother was when she had her son#and to be like ‘you can’t seriously believe your son won’t be different in 14 years time’#but I didn’t wanna make the comic longer so I opted for a post-show setting#there’s a Sakurai cameo because I love and miss him 🥺#remind me to never do comics with this lining brush again#my hand HUUUURTS#like it looks nice but GOOOODNESS GRACIOUS#anyways yes thank you for this ask#it would be really funny if it was really hard to change her mind#Y’know unlike the psychic antagonists in the show…Mob’s greatest reformation challenge…is Reigen’s older sister. who doesn’t have powers.#nobody tell her about Mameta and the UFO…she’d kill her brother on the spot#also don’t ask why I have Mob and Aneko’s name in first last format and Reigen’s in reverse#it just sounds…so wrong to say Arataka Reigen…it doesn’t flow as well… :(
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oh pallas and agnes power dynamic you really are SO unbelievably fucked,,,,,
#haven’t been able to write in days so i am posting instead. forgive me.#it’s just so. like. okay pallas has all of the material power here that’s not a question they’ve got much stronger magic they#know how the library works they’re directly placed in a mentorship role at the beginning re agnes she depends on them#for everything.#but also#pallas is very much Not Doing Well mentally (<- understatement of the century) and is pathologically incapable of processing their own#emotions related to this AT ALL. and in the process of trying very very hard to get to Know pallas (so pallas will Like her so pallas will#want to keep her alive) agnes kind of comes to understand a lot of pallas’s issues even better than pallas does and pallas starts to depend#on her for emotional support in a way they NEVER have with anyone else.#and pallas’s ability to show vulnerability has been soooo wrecked beyond belief that to them doing things like sharing part#of their backstory and being visibily hurt around someone is tantamount to placing a knife in someone’s hand and#then circling all of their weak points with a giant red marker while going ‘HEY STAB HERE’#so in their mind by doing this they’re giving agnes an IMMENSE amount of power over them like enough to kill them dead even though very#little else has changed about their dynamic. so pallas believes that they’re standing on much more equal ground then they really are#and agnes partly believes it too she thinks that by seeing this much of how broken down pallas is she’s finally found the balance in their#relationship she’s finally found a way to make it stable. and yeah. to some extent this is true!#pallas DOES listen to agnes more than any other person agnes IS the first person in years to understand them this much pallas’s dependence#on her for their mental wellbeing DOES give her some measure of power over them. but that power is given out on pallas’s terms is the thing#whether they’re aware of that or not. agnes wouldn’t have anything if pallas didn’t actively choose to be vulnerable with her there’d be#no way she’d learn about anything no way she’d get to play this role in their life#they believe that this thing is much more equal much more sustainable than it really is (pallas especially) and they’re#literally all each other have#grabs your face are you listening THEYRE ALL EACH OTHER HAVE IN THIS PLACE THEYRE BOTH IN SUCH HORRIFIC SITUATIONS AND THEY R EATING#EACHOTGER TO SURVIVE!!!!#head in fucking hands#wip: ghost story#pallas and agnes
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#house md#hate crimes md#amber volakis#remy thirteen hadley#you can’t tell me that’s NOT what this entire thing was skfidjwkkskd#amber had a crush and didn’t know how to handle it! so she told thirteen to get out of her school#(pretended like the patient and dog 13 killed were haunting her)#4x04#incorrect quotes#an anya original#this has been in my mind for MONTHS. thank you bird for motivating me to do it#100#incorrect house md#house + textposts#housetxt#alt text#anya's bs (badly edited shitposts)
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Nanami frantically digging through Shoko’s pamphlets and googling “how to give the ward you just met a sex talk” after the last chapter, this poor man needs a Xanax and a 12 hour nap SO badly right now 😂😂
fantastic chapter btw!! I love love love maki and am fully prepared to be terrorized by her plan—terror for her having to deal with the Zenin and terrorized because that girl is batshit insane and can do anything she sets her mind to ❤️
(I have a sneaking suspicion that her plan involves that mysterious “Okkotsu Yuuta as the world’s most unenthusiastic honeypot” tag, and OH BOY OH BOY am I on tenterhooks to see what insanity (positive) Maki comes up with)
Hope you have a great day!!
Nanami, frantically rushing to r/Parenting for this fucking hurdle of fatherhood:
I (27M) may have discovered my newly adopted son (16M) is in a relationship of indeterminate and possibly intimate nature with his three (15F, 15M, 15M) friends. I need emergency advice.
I only met/took in my eldest a few days ago. Those days have been extremely trying, and have unfortunately placed a very stressful burden on my son. I have tried to support him in any way I can; however, the young character of our relationship makes me fear overstepping his boundaries. I do not want to rush anything which may damage any trust he may form in me in the long run.
As a result, I do not believe having “The Talk” with him would be appropriate at this juncture. However, I fear it may be necessary.
I recently approached him while he was visiting with his close friends in a private room. I knocked (from what I believed to be a respectful distance designed to preserve his privacy) and heard a series of… disconcerting noises. His friend (15M) then proceeded to claim that he could not open the door because they were indecent. The door was quickly opened, and all parties were clothed, but this and other behaviors between the group make me wonder if they have something deeper than friendship between them.
His previous parents were neglectful, and the main influence he has had in recent months is… a rather sorry role model. I believe the assumption that he has not yet learned of safe sexual practices is appropriate. I want him to be comfortable with me before we speak of such matters, but I also want him to be safe in the present.
A complicating factor is that one of his friends (15M) rather frequently wears a hyper realistic panda costume. I bear absolutely no judgment or prejudice against any of his potential partners and support him in his relationship. However, I do not actually know the specifics that should be covered in a talk given the particularities of these partners.
Another complicating factor is that one of his friends (15F) would have been better off being raised by wolves than the sorry excuses of humanity that raised her. While I fear that I may overstep boundaries by speaking with my new ward about such topics so soon, I would most certainly overstep boundaries by broaching the matter with her. At the same time, I cannot deny my suspicions that such a conversation would be desperately needed. How should I proceed?
The fucking comments:
what is wrong with you and your life
there is no way you are a real person
ThatOneGuyinthePandaCostumeTokyo.com is this them
your kid is a furry
Nothing in Nanami’s years of teen parenting prepared him for that moment. The man discovered types of panic he did not know existed. POV you’ve known this boy for three days max and you’re the person Responsible For His Wellbeing and mid crisis you have to figure out 1) if it’s too soon in your relationship to give him the safe sex talk 2) if you can even avoid the safe sex talk if what seems to be happening is happening 3) would it even be appropriate to give the safe sex talk to the people he would be potentially having sex with and 4) is he a furry.
Nanami was not prepared to be confronted with this particular challenge of parenting. Especially because Megumi gave Tsumiki the puberty talk, no one’s been brave enough to give her the sex talk, and the entire teen parenting group has Megumi as too Baby in their minds to have even contemplated giving him any talks.
You have NO IDEA how excited I am for that tag.
Thank you for your kind words! I’m glad you liked it!
#I have unilaterally decided that Megumi explained to his own sister the miracle of her changing body#in my mind Tsumiki had no real parental influence prior to Gojo#her mom sure as hell didn’t explain periods to her#both Gojo and Nanami assumed Shoko would explain puberty to her#Shoko did not do that#she also had spent years lying to Gojo about what a woman’s time of the month meant#he believed it had something to do with the full moon#it sounded much like lycanthropy#he did not know blood would be involved#tsumiki in my mind had been slightly isolated from her peers growing up because of what was happening at home#she also did not know that blood would be involved#megumi knew#Megumi had read a book on it just in case#and then Tsumiki got her period. she thought she was bleeding internally. Gojo thought she was bleeding internally. there was hysteria.#they both thought she needed the hospital because she was dying#megumi sat them both down. told them if anyone made eye contact with him he would kill everyone in the room and then himself. if they ever#talked about this again he would kill everyone in this room and then himself. he was on a hairpin trigger.#there would be no follow up questions or discussion after. he will kill them all.#anyone it’s one of Tsumikis favorite memories even though it was mortifying#the fact that her little brother silently learned about puberty so he could explain it to her if he had to sort of was a big confirmation#that he loved her. and Megumi loved so quietly. it was just nice to hear.#sea glass gardens
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Jace lets Zara feed on him sometimes bc that’s his best friend and he loves her, Send Tweet
#I love vampires & feedings bc of the high level of intimacy#like I think Zara are those friends that you cannot tell if they’re dating or not and if asked they’re like ‘what is your problem??’#they just have such a level of intimacy ingrained in their friendship#they’re doing forehead and knuckle kisses#she was the first coworker he genuinely clicked with outside of his whole weird thing with Porter#Zara is the type of friend to be like I’ll kill your loser boyfriend if he hurts you 💖 and Jace is like ‘no one has ever cared this much#about me thank you’#he makes sure that she feeds regularly#he’ll level blood bags labeled with her name in the breakroom fridge and texts her if her classes run long to go grab it#porter gets jealous but also filled with bisexual panic when he sees them hugging one night#Zara kisses his forehead and when Porter makes eye contact he’s so pissed#he texts her later like ‘you’re trying to steal my boyfriend wtf’ and bc she knows Jace loves making Porter jealous#she’s like ‘I thought you didn’t mind sharing’ Porter fully breaks his phone#dimension 20#jace stardiamond#Zara sool#I made this post already and tumblr hit me with the nono stick
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they were doing “is madeleine a pedo for being attracted to claudia” discourse on twitter the other day and i would like it very much if twitter was just nuked as a website lol
#rani makes text posts no one will read#claudeleine#my answer is who cares#my deeper answer is madeleine knows claudia over the span of several years & seems to think she’s met & befriended a 16ish year old & by the#time things start getting more overtly romantic madeleine thinks she’s like a grown adult. this is very clearly stated in the show.#my even deeper answer is that the eroticism surrounding claudia’s body is like Part Of The Plot the fact that she has a child’s body and an#adult’s mind & what that potentially means for her romantically & sexually is a defining part of her character & the entire point of#madeleine in the narrative is to give claudia someone who desires her as she is & doesn’t want to change her is it weird perhaps that she’s#clearly attracted to a teenager but isn’t pushing that boundary at all maybe! but she refers to the nazi she fucks as a ‘scared boy’ so i do#think that a) madeleine is already quite young herself and b) madeleine much like louis armand lestat daniel etc has this sort of dark & odd#moral code that essentially means she does not give a shit that her potential lover & life companion looks like a child she’s attracted to#claudia sexually regardless And That’s What Makes Her A Good Candidate For Vampirism!!!!!!!!!#my final answer is who the fuck cares omg these characters are out here dropping each other from the stratosphere & turning their murders#into public spectacles & lynchings these are all mass murderers and you’re mad madeleine wants to fuck claudia who she thinks is like 19??#be soooooo fucjing fr with me omg i’m tired of age gap discourse and i say this as someone who has partaken in it yall don’t even know what#makes age gaps like ~problematic in relationships i hate u guys#anyways in my mind they fucked crazy nasty literally two seconds after madeleine was changed & the only reason they didn’t do it before was#cuz claudia was worried about accidentally killing her otherwise trust they would have had some floaty sex in the back of that shop!!!!!
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so… in the additional media of stranger things (specifically the comics i’m mentioning), it was initially brenner’s idea/plan to kill off the other test subjects because they weren’t performing as well as eleven was. it was his best solution because that way, all the resources, time, and money could instead be placed only to her. and i just…. sure henry is a fine character and the massacre makes a lot of sense to me, but i think i am once again gonna change up my canon to actually fit this potential narrative instead.
i genuinely think the comic canon of the lab and brenner is far more intriguing than the show. everything with 9/9.5, ricky, and francine. eleven being the only one who grew up completely in the lab. those other kids were either volunteers, well into their teens, or had some semblance of a home life. eleven was the only one practically moulded from the womb. and they all had such a range of interesting powers. i firmly stand with the idea that jane is the only one who can contact the void.
brenner’s entire point of view on the lab subjects changed the second he found out terry was pregnant. he discovered he could steal this baby and make her his own. there would be no convincing the child because it’s all she would have ever known. because of this, i would not put it past a man like brenner to kill the other subjects for the sake of the “greater good” in this case, eleven.
eleven’s gifts just continue thriving beyond his wildest expectations. brenner would never dare assume that having moulded her from the womb, she would still be able to grow into her own person, her own mind, and one day be able to see him for exactly who he was.
back before season four aired, it was obvious there were other test subjects because jane was 011. so there were at least ten kids before her. but i always liked the idea/assumed that she was the last experiment because she was the most successful. that they didn’t need anyone after her because she was fulfilling everything they set out for her to do. with flying colours.
i just think the whole rainbow room idea, pitting the kids against each other thing… been there, done that. boring and predictable. i think at this point my portrayal of her time in hawkins lab really stems from the complete isolation she endured. where having the rainbow room, although eleven was obviously the most isolated out of the kids, brings that sense of community and sister/brotherhood. albeit extremely warped and toxic. knowing that she wasn’t alone in that experience just. doesn’t sit well with me. i think it’s important to note that she was alone, physically and mentally. which is why kali is also so important to her growth. i thought a lot of the flashbacks of her time in the lab during season four was really boring, repetitive, and just very predictable. although peter becoming vecna was a surprise to me, and was a nice little twist, the idea of her having an ally on the inside was really interesting.
maybe they did get as far as they do in canon, peter ballad was telling the truth about everything, about some of the workers there being prisoners like him, and he really wanted to get her out and to safety. but before they can escape through the pipes, they’re caught. peter is shot on the spot, and eleven is put into the isolation room for a few days as punishment. in this timeline, henry would be vecna, but henry would not be peter ballad.
when eleven turned seven, and was already showing extreme promise, where the other children were average at best, brenner had the eight children killed. kali had already escaped. this was the main cause for peter to gain eleven’s trust and try to get her out. because if brenner could murder his “children” in cold blood, there’s no way eleven was safe even in spite of her power.
when eleven is allowed out of the isolation room, her testing becomes more rigorous in attempt to distance and make her forget about what she attempted to do with peter. brenner begins gaslighting her, saying that there was never a peter, that she must have been dreaming. eleven does ask “papa” about “mama”, given peter told her of the day terry broke in the lab, but brenner is convincing enough to make eleven believe it was all in her head. say she is around eight years old, meaning the same timeline of season fours canon flashbacks.
i still do wanna keep the henry creel canon, and keep him as 001. brenner didn’t have him killed alongside the other test subjects, because who knows, one day he could become an even better asset than 011. brenner definitely wants to be able to control henry, but keeps the chip in him because, for the moment, doesn’t know how. killing him would be too big of a loss.
when eleven is ten years old, henry’s concealed powers break free and he manages to get the chip out himself, and unleashes hell onto hawkins lab. he almost kills brenner by snapping his bones, but eleven manages to stop him. her extreme abilities are unleashed, and she sends henry to the upside down. she does fall into a coma due to the extremity of the situation, but she does not forget what happened. brenner believes she’s the perfect weapon as she stepped in to save him without a second thought, was able to defeat henry, and opened a door to something he never thought possible. eleven is rewarded for her efforts. although she remembers the entire battle / confrontation, her memories regarding the portal are very hazy.
brenner decides not to focus on the portal straight away, instead gets her training harder and harder to see what else she can accomplish. also loved the idea of brenner sending her into the void to “look for him” so that will definitely be kept.
by the time she escapes and season one begins, her knowledge of the upside down is basically what we see in canon. because she passed out the moment after she sent henry away, she was once again gaslighted into believing she merely threw him through the glass and killed him. for two years she believed this, until making contact with the demogorgan, and those memories return completely.
due to her saving brenner’s life, (it was pure instinct. she happened to be there. saw her “papa” hurt and knew she had to make him better.) brenner constantly thanks her. but in a very condescending way. tells her: “you saved me so i can continue saving you.” aka, harness your abilities and see what else i can achieve from you. despite the fact that she saved his life, these words and phrases make her feel indebted to him. that she owes him something further.
i don't realistically see her thriving with her speech improvement until she's well into her twenties at least. her slowed development, sensory and social deprivation causes a serious delay in language. surrounded by other children she would have overheard conversations, some would have spoken to her. her conveniently forgetting her upbringing pre the battle with henry just isn't good enough for me anymore. it makes more sense for her to have been raised alone.
it also helps indicate why she gravitated towards the boys when they found her in the woods. they would have been the first people her age she ever remembered seeing. as far as she knew, during the lab there was no one like her. everyone was much older, they were adults-- although she stayed with benny, i'm not sure if she would have stuck around very long. where she followed the boys home without thought.
also it's important to note that after time, jane does understand that peter ballad was a real person, and was truly the first person (aside from terry) who wanted the best for her. when she remembers him, knows that brenner was lying, she deals with immense guilt regarding his death. he was shot right in front of her eyes, because he was trying to help her. this is another catalyst as to why after season two, jane never refers to brenner as papa. she does not give him that sort of credit.
#study‚ in my dreams it's all real and my heart has so much to reveal.#THINKING THOUGHTS. i have had this concept in mind for a while but i THINK i’ve fleshed it out properly now.#will write this up properly one day (never).#although henry offering eleven a place at his side wouldn’t be canon#he would definitely still look at her as an enemy for basically stopping his revenge.#AND the whole speech between he and jane never sat right with me.#saying brenner made him what he was / that it wasnt his fault etc. Like. No? henry was a sociopath. he killed his family.#brenner didn’t do anything to make him who he is. so jane always saw him for exactly what he was#and there’s absolutely no sympathy there.#and then regarding my season four canon as her regaining her powers by remembering the massacre/the fight. i am changing that to her#regaining her powers by simply confronting her past. understanding what she went through. finding ways to cope with it physically and#mentally. getting coping mechanisms from her therapist. seeking help. not needing to know WHY this happened to her (because there is not.#and will never be a reason.) but finding ways to accept it and move on. how to move on from eleven and become janessa ives.#also just because in this case henry doesn’t massacre a bunch of kids? It doesn’t make him any less evil. in this instance i am following#the idea that some of the workers were prisoners there in hawkins lab. and henry killed a bunch of the workers. so would definitely have#killed some innocent people.#just because i am separating peter from henry. does NOT mean i am excusing anything from henry/vecna.#in this case they are two completely different people. although i highkey wanna use jcb as peter because he just did the role SO WELL and#was SO BELIEVABLE i’m not sure about it yet. because i don’t want anyone to get the impression that i’m making excuses for henry.#BUT YES.#this be the new canon. <3#idc brenner is such a good fuckin villain he’s disgusting but so intriguing.
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Nintendo products existing in Pokemon implies Pikmin exists in Pokemon which leads me to,,,,
The headcanon that Piers will periodically and randomly show Max a picture of Oatchi, because every time she sees Oatchi (if she’s not playing Pikmin 4/watching someone else play Pikmin 4) she recites That’s My Pikmin Dog
Except she almost always, without fail, flubs and mixes up the lines. So when she catches it she’ll just stop doing it and cover her face and cringe at herself while Piers just looks on super disappointed, maybe wincing too sometimes. Shaking his head even. Calling her names (fake Oatchi enjoyer, etc)
In the off chance she makes it through to the “that’s my Pikmin dog!” part, Piers rewards her by doing the backup vocals
#the first time (and one of the only times) she made it through was once when piers woke her up just to do this#she was half asleep so she didn’t even realize she was killing it. piers was so proud of her#minmaxshipping#ty tumblr user praazlwurm for the ship name I’m obsessed with it#your mind!!!#oc maxine#shut up crisa#piers pokemon
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Do you think if I wish hard enough my mom will get electrocuted by a string of Christmas lights and just go up in a cloud of smoke. It’d be a Christmas miracle
#I’m not even DOWN THERE YET and I want to fucking KILL HER#I have to work Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas. I live four hours away from my family#I told her this MANY TIMES I said I’ll drive down after work on Christmas Eve be there Christmas morning but I need to leave by 3-4 to get#home at a reasonable hour so I can have time to unpack/catch up on a couple days of chores/get plenty of sleep#she called me last night and told me she didn’t schedule Christmas stuff until SIX PM#and when I said why tf did you do that I’m not staying that late#she got mad and upset and was like ‘it’s the only time everyone is free :(‘#BUT THEN proceeded to tell me we were having lunch with her HUSBAND’S family at noon#(ppl I am not close with never have been literally don’t talk to)#and everyone I know is like ‘just leave when you said you were going to anyways’#and like yeah I could but then my family is gonna be ENRAGED that I didn’t do Christmas stuff with them#and they’re like ‘well explain that your mom didnt listen to when you said you needed to leave’#but the thing is. no matter what. they’re going to take her side#I should sacrifice my time and comfort to spend time with them because they’re FAMILY#never mind that literally not a SINGLE ONE OF THEM has EVER come up to visit me#IM always expected to drive down there. but that sacrifice doesn’t count it’s not good enough#but if I stay that late I won’t be getting home until AT LEAST midnight or later#cuz my family has no fucking concept of time so if it starts at six that means it doesn’t ACTUALLY start until 7 so most of them might be#there by 8 so I’ll be expected to stay until at least 10 to sufficiently catch up with all of them#I’m going to scream I’m going to cry#if I leave early I’m the awful ungrateful terrible bitch who never comes to see any of them#but none of them could adjust their days by just a few hours to see me before I needed to leave#FOR MY FUCKING JOB !!!!!!!! SOMETHING COMPLETELY OUT OF MY CONTROL#and like the thing is. my piece of shit manipulative bitch mother#I KNOW she did this on purpose#I know she didn’t plan this until six to FORCE me to stay longer because she was mad I wasn’t staying long#(again… because of work… something I can’t control)#so she’s orchestrated this to put me in this position#where I have to suck it up and stay and be exhausted and have tired migraines for a week cuz I get only a couple hours of sleep and then#or leave and make everyone pissed. I hate her so FUCKING much
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can’t stop thinking about silver’s final speech to madi describing flint’s unmaking as a description of himself as he returned to madi after thinking she had died. Whatever.
#his relationship w her is insane I refuse to talk abt it any further. but also I feel like I’ve been poisoned#black sails#literally whose mind Id in some ways incorporated into my own. it was a strange experience to see something from it so unexpected.#Edit: ok I’ll explain a little more. if silver truly did kill flint he had to have made all that up. right. right????#so it’s just him. it’s always been him.#he spends the last few episodes arguing that flint and him don’t share a mind that they aren’t the same. but he falls back on it w madi.#because he has to guess what flint would do in that position. but that position (returning to ur ‘dead’ lover) is HIS position#and even if he didn’t kill flint. he’s understanding flint thru his own interpretation#some other people on here have talked about that speech a lot in light of flint being alive and they did it better than me so I won’t#but if he’s dead…… he just makes flint into himself. incorporates him fully and sells it to madi. how could she not believe it? it’s him
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like i think the insane thing about the episode is how it continued to push the collector-luz, luz-philip and philip-collector parallels throughout it to then just hand wave it, like why do ALL THAT and then just drop it? like why put so much focus on it and then just, nothing?
#also kinda turning hunter into fanon caleb two point O is. yikes to say the least.#like they had so much time to course correct and put focus on what’s actually important and just didn’t.#like if they wanted to kill Philip of in an unsatisfying way they could have just let him die at the end of kings tide and concentrate on#the collector or just cut the collector and keep focus on Philip if he was anyways gonna be the final boss.#they could have done hollow mind part two either with the collector in the beginning or when luz died she could have manifested in Philips#mind as she was passing on (<- i guess(like is the inbetween purgatory or what is it?))#make her go through his memories let her restore some of them. let Philip deal with the guilt you set up in kings tide. HELL LET GUS DO SOME#THING HE LITERALLY KNOWS FOR MONTHS THAT HE FEELS ACTUAL GUILT ABOUT THIS. LIKE DO ANYTHING PLEASE.#hell let the collector turn Philip into a puppet. trap him into one of those mirrors. like let the collector work together with king and eda#to trap Philip as luz is weakening him as she treads through his mind both in his stead and as an observer of it all#like what the collector did to Luz. Eda and King in the beginning episode is what the Caleb delusion did to Philip in ftf.#like what was the point of setting up Gravesfieled as a horrid cesspool that hasn’t changed. that literally forces outsiders to conform or#they’ll make their lives a nightmare to then just do nothing with that. like do somethin give us payoff for what is in the TEXT OF YOUR SHOW#like why make EVERYTHING HAPPEN BECAUSE OF CALEB ABANDONING HIS BROTHER AND BECAUSE OF GRAVESFIELD BEING LIKE THAT IF YOU ARE SIMPLY GONNA#DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WITH IT? especially after knowing that you would have to wrap up everything sooner why not course correct sooner then#the literal finishing stretch of your show. why hand wave it after setting it up? why not just cut it then (<- which still would have sucked#ass but at least it would have given them time they needed to write a more satisfying ending)#ramblings#toh spoilers#watching and dreaming spoilers#toh critical#<- i guess
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The fact Scary has reasons behind her actions don’t justify them or stop them from causing harm and I think she needs to take responsibility in a way that doesn’t shift the blame or victimize herself or else she won’t ever truly grow tbh.
#I think it’s fun thinking about why she’s like this tho#and yes I know she IS a victim#of Willys shit#but in the same way mental illness can cause bad actions#and he can as well#despite any influence she’s under#it doesn’t mean she didn’t DO anything#it doesn’t make her harm not hurtful#and if her eventual apology has any ‘I didn’t know better’ ‘he was just..’ ‘I was hurting so..’#I will scream#if she victimizes herself in an apology I’ll lose my mind#someone could say ‘hey kill this persons pet or I’ll kill your mother’#and I’d do it#and the reason would be so perfectly sound#but I would sTILL APOLOGIZE DEEPLY FOR THE PAIN I CAUSED THAT PERSON#yk?#ok anyways#I’m rambling I just#dndads s2#dndads#dungeons and daddies#dndads spoilers
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regretting getting festival ticket. but i know i would also regret not getting it
#for different reasons#ig this is how i feel about every decision i’ve made recently#thinking about it makes me sick i’m so stressed out why did i agree to go#i need to kill myself but i can’t do that without a trigger and my dad hasn’t been shitty for a week or two#i’m just. the most unhappy i’ve been in months and there is nothing waiting for me that will make it better#i should’ve started taking meds again but i didn’t and now the prescription has expired#well. not now it’s been like 2 months#idk why maybe bc i don’t think they’d change anything maybe bc my family was weird about them#but the last time i brought this up with my mom she got angry at me for trying to blame her#like yeah shit sorry hearing you complain abt me taking medication affected the way i look at it#bc now she’s all for it but i don’t think i believe her#it’s always 'what do they even do they won’t fix you' bc i guess it never crossed her mind they aren’t meant to cure anything#but rather help manage everyday life#whatever i’ve been having trouble with sleep again too#i’m just so so fucking tired all the time and when i get home all i can do is lay down#and i fall asleep but it’s shallow and i’m just stuck barely conscious having dreams which i hate#i need to look if i can return the ticket
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I do have to wonder how much of my ‘blood pressure being high’ was just due to 1) anxiety and 2) not being able to put the fact that this doctor basically killed my friend’s sister-in-law out of my mind
#okay she didn’t KILL her kill her but she failed to notice this woman had stomach cancer for well over a year#she presented with every symptom and this doctor kept fobbing her off; cancelling appointments; losing referrals etc#until Finally she managed to get referred to a specialist and they did a scan and found out she had stage 4 stomach cancer#she died six months after that. she’d been living without treatment for a year prior to diagnosis like… they could’ve saved her#this doctor specifically could’ve saved her#why did i see this doctor you ask? well there’s four doctors at my regular practice. two of them are male. i don’t fuck with male doctors#nothing against them but discussing my personal intimate problems with a man i don’t know and no chaperone is just not for me#i also had a male doctor repeatedly make weird comments about my body when i was a teenager so there is that#my dentist is a man though and we like him. one boy allowed#Anyway so there’s the two male doctors and then there’s this woman who basically killed my friend’s family member#and then there’s the other woman doctor but she is on leave at the moment and only taking phone appointments. she wouldn’t be back until#after my microgynon prescription ran out and she can’t take my blood pressure over the phone. so i was like. would i rather be examined#by a man or someone who is an idiot at best and negligent at worse. or take my chances with freeballing this shit (my period)#so there i am sitting in this woman’s office seething and no surprise; the best figure she could get from me was 121 over 95#bear in mind i’m usually sitting at 100 over 80. so.#she did take my blood pressure 5 times but the last time i saw she got an upper figure of 103 and she didn’t write the lower figure???#so i’m wondering if the meditation i was trying to do actually Did take my blood pressure down and she just didn’t want to accept it lol#should i buy a blood pressure monitor? i mean.. literally no because that’s an unnecessary expense and i’ve placed a moratorium#on unnecessary shopping in order to justify/afford a fucking TREADMILL#but seriously. i’m starting to wonder if i actually have hypertension or if i was just pissed at this woman. or if she’s just incompetent#i swear i’m not just mad because this is my second day of a reduced salt diet and i’m not enjoying it lol#i’m sticking to her orders i’m just….. i don’t know if it was bullshit or not. i mean how do i trust someone who watched a woman waste away#to skin and bone and continually fumbled referral paperwork and just overall failed to see that Something Was Very Wrong#i’m following her advice out of malicious compliance and because i don’t think it can hurt me but still. Still#personal
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#my cousin’s baby mama tried to kill me unprovoked today#idk why but the more I furiously blast it the more I can get over it#it also shows how little my family cares about boundaries that are set#I’ve told my cousin countless times baby mama 3 ain’t allowed here and she’s come over countless times#today she randomly flips her lid as I’m walking to my car#and I’m like????? cause damn sometimes I do wanna unalive but not at any one’s hand other than my own#and cops got called twice today#she came back in the evening bc they let her go and they were like omg post partum depression#and I’m like see this is why I don’t want kids cause apparently you lose your fucking kind#mind*#so then I hear her yelling and threatening me and I’m glaring at my aunt after ripping her and my cousin a new one after work#lost my appetite and all#and I gotta pick myself up after work and pretend nothing happened#no one ever bothered to check up on me in my family#my abuela calls to check up on my cousin and aunt but didn’t bother to check to see if I was okay#like Lmao I hate my family#like deadass I know it’s a strong ass word but I sincerely I just—cannot be arsed with them#they’re fucking selfish assholes#so yeah#today I hate them
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