#shannon do you know how insane that would make me

[camelspit]

stina on the book 10 cover (pleading)

[wildehacked]

thinking about those 'when did they fall in love polls,' and wondering once again about how much of eddie's feelings about buck in early s3 are actually about shannon, and how/when that flips and the feelings become about buck.

like, okay, here's a bold claim (do i believe it? i'm curious about it. i'm making the claim but i'm curious to see if i'm right. you get it):

eddie telling buck "there's no one i trust with my son more than you" is eddie working through his feelings about shannon, not wholly about buck and buck's relationship with christopher.

my reasoning:

shannon just died, like, an emotional SECOND ago

in the months leading up to her death, she and eddie fought (pretty devastatingly!) over whether or not he could trust chris with her

he ultimately decided he could

one of the last conversations they ever had was about shannon telling him that she wanted to be there for chris so badly that she didn't want to try to have a romantic relationship with eddie at the same time

and then she died

so okay, like, an emotional second after that, buck ALMOST dies

eddie's in the hospital waiting room while they work on buck's leg and he was JUST there for shannon, and this is someone else who he cares deeply about, who is becoming more and more important to him, and he might die and idk it's just plausible to me that the feelings would get. weird and mixy.

then buck's depressed because he's home and recovering and can't go back to work, and eddie decides he's going to cheer him up by having buck babysit christopher

buck has NEVER BABYSAT CHRIS BEFORE, this is implied to be his FIRST BABYSITTING GIG OUT THE GATE

the tsunami happens. eddie sees buck standing there looking devastated with christopher's glasses around his neck, someone he trusted with chris who has, perhaps, failed him, and has the worst five seconds of his life before he realizes christopher is alive. and then chris tells eddie all about how buck saved him and he knew buck would come back.

and buck thinks eddie won't ever trust chris with him again, and, you know, it's honestly not an unreasonable fear. the thought HAS to have crossed eddie's mind, like, can you trust this person who you trusted your son with and then your son almost died

and eddie comes back HARD with reassurances that yeah, buck failed that kid, but eddie's failed him too, and the important thing is that they both love him anyway.

That's a different version of a conversation he and Shannon already have, back in that parking lot in season two, except because it's the second iteration, Eddie leans right into the reassurance I think he wishes he'd given Shannon, in hindsight: there's no one I trust with my son more than you.

like, okay. that's an insane thing to say and mean, given Carla and Pepa and Abuela. but he does say it. and i think it's partially because Eddie is incredibly moved by Buck saving Chris's life, and he IS inclined to give people second chances, AND I think it's because, like. for romantic reasons but also NDE/grief reasons and "Chris loves you" reasons, I think he's mixing up some of his new feelings for Buck with his old feelings for Shannon.

There's no one I trust with my son more than you, Eddie says, and I'm not saying he doesn't mean it, or that he isn't saying it TO Buck, but. I do think it's a sentiment that's very deeply informed by what he wishes he'd said to Shannon.

okay and then there's also the grocery store fight! this one's easier/less ambiguous, imo. eddie blows up at buck for abandoning christopher, but actually for abandoning him, we all agree on that. but i think he's actually pretty unambiguously projecting some of his anger at shannon for abandoning him and christopher onto buck. "did you even think about christopher? do you even know how much he misses you? how could you." LIKE. this is a fight you're having with your coparent who left you!!! we already know that Eddie's working out his grief over Shannon with anger and violence in the fighting ring plot—to me the grocery store fight is more of the same. It's not that he's not legitimately angry at Buck, but the WAY he's angry is like—a much bigger response than is seemingly merited by Buck's actual betrayal, as we can see by the way Chim and Hen respond. And that's because Eddie's been slowly falling for Buck, yes, and because Chris DOES miss him, but I think it's also because, like—he's grieving his wife! He's saying the things he never said to her to Buck, because even in his anger he still views Buck as a safe person to get mad at, because he doesn't think Buck will really leave forever.

it's funny bc Buck tells Eddie explicitly that he thinks Eddie was projecting his feelings about Buck onto the fights. And I'm like, well, you're right, but I think he's also projecting his feelings about Shannon's death onto YOU. he's a projector.

and then after that you've got a series of some of the most domestic / romantic buddie episodes in the show—like, buck and eddie "go for the title," buck brings christmas to the firehouse, buck and eddie build chris the adaptive skateboard, buck is firmly part of chris and eddie's life in a way that's NEW, a closeness that they were building to in s2 but which only gets to thrive now, in mid s3. like—eddie and chris are healing over the worst of the grief. eddie starts to rebuild his life, emotionally, and he puts buck directly in the center. and that IS about buck, not shannon, even if it is about the empty space she left in eddie's life.

and then we get the well collapse, and eddie does a mental rehash of his marriage and his baby—how he and shannon failed each other, and failed chris, but also how they were each there for him at different times, how he wants to be there for chris forever. and he digs himself out of his grave. and he puts buck in his will.

is that "about" shannon? it's about eddie's relationship with shannon, definitely. like, okay, it's about christopher, first and foremost—but I do think it's also about eddie's feelings for buck. he wants chris to be happy and safe; he thinks buck would keep chris happy and safe. because he's been carefully rebuilding his life around buck! ever since he, like, kind of rehashed some of the biggest mistakes he feels like he and shannon made in their marriage with buck, but this time it ended up better. buck failed chris, and eddie decided to keep trusting him. buck left, and eddie yelled at him about leaving, and buck came back and fit himself even more deeply into their lives.

i don't think the parallels continue that far past season three, because I think that's the peak of eddie's grief, and thus the place he's dealing with his subconscious shannon feelings most directly, but like. i don't know, they're there! buck was kim before kim was kim, only kim knew there was a script ("I loved you, I'm sorry,"), and buck DIDN'T, but he still managed to say and do the exact things eddie needed to hear. (Most of what Buck does is just find opportunities for him and Chris and Eddie to spend time together. BREAK MY HEART RIGHT OPEN, you know????)

[thetrialsandtribulationsofeb]

do you think the writers have written buddie the way they are intentionally or not? ive been going crazy about this bc if its intentional it would feel mean for them to not go canon and if its unintentional then its just kind of an insanely unbelievable amount of "which could mean nothing" thats kind of hilarious. i would love to know your thoughts on this

i had to gather all my brain power to write the answer to your question, so buckle up

and i’m gonna mention all the previous seasons because i think it plays a huge role when you compare season 8 to them

i think they were definitely written as just best friends/comrades in seasons 2 and 3, and i’m including the “eddie begins” episode, because the way buck digs through dirt and screams eddie’s name - and the fact that buck is in a lot of eddie’s visions when he’s underwater - still felt platonic to the writers. and as much as we love to talk about how eddie kind of replaced his wife with buck as proof for buddie, it can still read as both platonic and romantic. like, you can see it as romantic, but it’s not the strongest argument

also, the weird tension in the gym in 2x01 was played as “rivalry” and “jealousy” from buck’s side and “amusement” from eddie’s side. i don’t think ryan and oliver were trying to make it sexual, but it came out that way anyway because of their chemistry. and this type of chemistry doesn’t mean the actors are dating or even attracted to each other irl. it just happens sometimes between two people, and it’s not their fault :D

“you wanna go for the title?” kitchen scene still confuses me though, because if the same exact thing - with the same angles, dialogue, and acting - happened between a male and female character, everyone with eyes would assume it was leading to them kissing and ending up in bed. so i still have no idea why it had to be so weirdly sexual if they didn’t want people to see it that way

but season 4 is where things get weird, because i consider it the buddiest season of all. despite ana and taylor being there, buck and eddie feel way more like a romantic couple with their interactions. like, they’re so weirdly flirty with each other. and i also only recently found out that apparently ryan and oliver were in some kind of fight and weren’t on speaking terms during s4, which puzzles me so much, because this season has the most heart eyes and tension between them. maybe it’s because they were like, “okay, we need to stay professional and continue playing these characters as besties,” and they kind of overdid it. but idk if those rumors are even true. the whole ana panic attack situation can be explained by eddie’s grief over shannon (which is silly on the writers’ part), but it still reads as gay-coded at the same time. so again - maybe it wasn’t intentional, but it leaves room for different interpretations

the way they parallel eddie’s NDE in the s4 finale with bathena’s talk about how losing someone you love is such an unimaginable concept, how they focus on buck and eddie’s faces when eddie wakes up in the hospital instead of ana, the will speech after bucktaylor’s kiss, the way they focus on buck’s smile at eddie’s “welcome home” party - it feels like they were kind of playing with their dynamic in a slightly different way. still, they probably didn’t think of them as romantic. but again, if the same things were written between opposite-sex characters, they’d totally understand why it does feel romantic. or maybe it was intentional, but they had to play by the network’s rules (and fox didn’t want buddie to happen)

then we move to seasons 5 and 6, where they went back to totally platonic again. even though they’re still very domestic, and eddie’s reaction to buck’s NDE was very similar to his reaction to shannon’s death, and the way eddie was looking at buck at poker night - which could be seen as not platonic - i just know the writers toned down the buddiness because they added lucy, natalia, and marisol, even though those relationships felt flat. and the whole eddie-trying-to-find-a-relationship arc was painful to watch. but since fox shut down buck’s bisexual arc and another writer that saw buddie as completely platonic was working on these seasons (i don’t remember her name), they just tried to stay away from buddie

and then came season 7, where everything shifted

the copy-paste parallels between 7x01 and 2x01 - it’s like they rewatched that episode and decided to recreate those scenes. and buck - the main character in his 30s - finally being allowed to be queer because the network approved it is what changes the game

another thing i found out recently is that tim not only wanted to make tommy eddie’s love interest at first, but also bring lucy back as buck’s love interest, because he “still couldn’t find a good romantic partner for buck” (meanwhile eddie is right there 🙄), so he was like, “maybe that’s it”

but some things didn’t work out with both of those ideas (lucy’s actress was unavailable and tim changed his mind about tommy and eddie), so they went a different route and made tommy buck’s love interest, and the queerness realization arc was given to buck instead

and i’m glad it happened that way, because buck finding out his bisexuality first makes more sense for his character, considering his background and personality. it’s easier for him

and i genuinely think the best way for eddie to discover his queerness is through his feelings for buck, ‘cause with his religious heteronormative upbringing, it fits him better

so s7 was supposed to be about exploring eddie’s sexuality, but i guess since tim changed his mind (which, again, i’m glad he did, ’cause it made sense for buck to discover his attraction to men first), he decided to throw in kim’s storyline to get rid of marisol and make eddie lose chris - which opened up his s8 arc. and because he loves “vertigo”

idk, just the fact that tim was considering making eddie attracted to men already means he wanted to make buddie canon. ’cause if he wanted to leave their relationship as platonic, he could’ve focused on eddie’s “straightness” and his relationships with women more. but instead, he brought up eddie’s catholic guilt and the bobby and eddie dialogue about commitment in s7. and then the whole priest talk about beards, disguises, failures, forgiveness, and joy. and that same episode had a throwback to “eddie begins” with the well emergency and bobby saying, “i don’t think you’re gonna fit this time,” and ended with buck coming to eddie right after eddie’s joy dance. which maybe could be coincidental, but idk how stupid you have to be as a writer to not realize how weird all those lines and scenes look together. and the episode is literally called “confessions” (“i’m not your last” is also a confession in its own way)

and the whole buck-tommy-eddie triangle is the biggest buddie proof for me, ’cause it was always about buck’s feelings for eddie and tommy knowing that as long as buck and eddie are together, he’s just a third wheel. otherwise the way he breaks up with buck doesn’t make any sense

also, tim admitted in interviews that buck and eddie’s characters don’t work without each other and that the show gets worse without their connection - and that they sound more like an old married couple going through a breakup than just best friends parting ways in 8x09-8x10

also, ryan guzman said in an interview that he watches buddie edits with oliver, understands why fans ship them, and is open to the idea - but if buddie were to happen, he still wants it to stay true to his character. which i get and agree with

but i also think this is exactly what they were doing

’cause again, the right way for eddie to discover his queerness is not through dating some random dude (which works in buck’s case), but through how he feels about buck

also, eddie’s reaction to buck coming out to him and saying he wants to date tommy - and also to buck and tommy’s hug at the bachelor’s party and their kiss at the hospital - is really weird. idk, it seemed like heartbreak and jealousy mixed with confusion to me (‘cause eddie doesn’t understand why he’s feeling so weird at this point, and some acting choices from ryan were definitely made)

and even though gay!eddie wasn’t planned until season 7, and the way he acted weird with women - including shannon - was supposedly because they had a difficult relationship due to her early pregnancy and chris’ CP, it still also reads as him being gay. so it is still true to his character. even if it weren’t intentional, it still would make sense for him to turn out to be gay

but i’m not sure how exactly the writers see eddie’s sexuality. they’re probably too stupid to go down the acknowledging eddie’s gayness and/or demisexuality lane

though i’d like for them to explore eddie’s view on his relationship with shannon - like, make him revisit it and see it in a new light now that he understands himself better

but it likely won’t happen, and he’s going to end up just bucksexual, which i’m okay with, i guess

then we have tim quite literally paralleling eddie to abby with him moving to el paso. and that he actually wanted to compare eddie to abby in buck and maddie’s dialogue in 8x11, but that line was scrapped ’cause the network thought it was too confusing and the audience wouldn’t get the reference

and the way they started to address buck’s feelings for eddie in 8b - these were very obvious signs. and if they don’t follow through on them, then it’s just really bad writing

which leads to the whole bobby’s death mess. ’cause it is a case of really bad writing from tim. before this, i was sure that season 8 would end with buddie canon - because eddie would come back to LA with chris after deciding to cut his parents off and choose himself and his joy once and for all. and it would lead to him finally choosing buck and making a move (love confession/a kiss). i didn’t think that buck would be the first to confess, because he still thinks eddie is straight and wouldn’t risk their friendship like that - he would just bury his feelings if he had to

but tim’s decision to kill bobby - that “had been lingering in the back of his mind for years” - threw me off so much, because literally no one saw it coming and no one thought that’s where the season was going, including the actors and the producers

so it leaves me with 3 options for how this all could go:

1) tim realizes he made a huge mistake and resurrects bobby. or maybe he wanted to fake-kill bobby from the very beginning and is just trying to sell the idea very hard so that no one will figure out bobby is actually alive. and buddie’s feelings realization will happen either during the grief period before they find out bobby’s alive, or after it

2) bobby is actually dead, but buddie will still become canon. which won’t save the show, because they’ve already lost a huge chunk of casual viewers, and even the buddie shippers are mad. ’cause without bobby, the show and its characters will be so different that it won’t even be enjoyable

3) not only is bobby actually dead, but buddie also won’t become canon, because tim decided to “raise the stakes.” so from now on, all the character development will be thrown in the trash, all the main characters will be ooc, they’ll focus on some random characters like gerard and brad, and the show will only be about big emergencies and the spectacle with no heart and soul

option 2 will be bad for the show because killing bobby is a really bad writing decision, and literally everyone on the show except tim thought that. so, again, buddie won’t save it, and it’s in poor taste to make such an important ship canon alongside ruining the show with this death

and option 3 will not only obviously destroy the show, but it will also be the worst and most infuriating and cruel case of queerbaiting in history - ’cause i’ve seen a lot of people who didn’t believe in buddie before start realizing buck and eddie are in love with each other during season 8. which means the writing is on the wall, and we’re not imagining or stretching things. so to not follow through is dumb af

so, in conclusion, i think it was partly intentional and partly unintentional in s2–s6, and all these coincidences are happening because the universe works in mysterious ways. and i think it was mostly intentional in seasons 7 and 8. but season 8 did everything to start addressing the way buck and eddie feel toward each other - and that it’s not just friendship from both sides

[lemotmo]

I can see this. This would be nice to watch.

Q. I have no idea how they're going to be able to explain the Kim thing away in any way that can or will be sensible though and be able to tie that into any kind of realization where Buck is concerned.

A. Oh they can explain the Kim stuff pretty easily and I don't think they're even going to try to make it a complicated thing. Eddie has tremendous guilt where Shannon is concerned and I think a lot, if not most, of Eddie's Shannon issues have to do with his guilt way more so than any lingering feelings for her. He needs the release of closure. That's what he's chasing. He and Shannon reconnected, had another pregnancy scare, and he was ready to walk right back into the mistake they made the first time around. Luckily Shannon recognized it as the mistake it would have been and asked for the divorce. But then she died. Eddie never got the conversation he needed to have with her. They each deserved that conversation from the other, and it's heartbreaking that they were never allowed that moment. That's what Kim represented. A chance to get the answers and closure he needs to feel allowed to move on. It doesn't need to make perfect sense because he's desperate for the release so he clung to the opportunity Kim presented, even though it was an insane idea to begin with. But if a person is desperate enough they can find a way to rationalize anything.

Until the show tells me otherwise I still believe some part of Eddie knows he's in love with Buck. But he doesn't feel like he deserves to be truly happy because of the kind of husband he was to Shannon. So he won't allow himself to have him. Eddie's relationship pattern is going after the partners he believes he should be looking for, but once he gets them he rejects them. Why does he do that? Because they're not really what he wants, and a big part of him knows that so he either walks away from them (Ana) or he sabotages the relationship (Marisol). Kim showed up and allowed the part of them that wants to be happy to see it as an opportunity for amends. And he took it. Eddie's entire arc has been framed as allowing himself joy. Ryan even said that Eddie has to figure himself out, learn to love himself and then his person will present themselves. I've talked myself out of believing that Eddie will be injured at the end of 8x11. Tim's comments to TV Line about the story showing both Buck and Eddie's side of their story also sounds like he won't be injured because you kind of need Eddie present and alert to get his side of things. But I also realized that injuring Eddie ties his realization or acceptance moment to tragedy and thus far the show has done the opposite of that. They've tied his arc to finding his joy. That will most likely continue into his Buck moment. Buck will get the 'oh shit I'm in love with my best friend and am going to ruin everything ' spiral. Eddie will get the release and relief of realizing he can let himself have Buck. That sounds more plausible given the little bit of information we have currently.

Thank you Nonny!

Oh this is interesting meta and speculation.

To me Kim was that last-ditch attempt to cling onto the ghost of Shannon. He desperately wanted to feel something for Marisol, but he couldn't, so he put all of his faith in Kim, who looked so much like his late wife. But it all turned out to be hollow and false.

It forced him to say goodbye to Shannon once and for all. He needs to find a way to move on and find his own joy first and eventually find someone new to fall in love with that isn't tied to the ghost of Shannon or some 'forced' believe that he 'should' find someone to perfectly slot into the Shannon-shaped hole she left behind.

It's time for something new now. Something all of his own. Something he can actively choose and pick. Someone he chooses to love and be with. Someone who couldn't be more different from Shannon if he tried.

And let it just be that there is this great guy called Buck, his best friend, who already fits perfectly in all of Eddie's little nooks and crannies.

🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

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[mbirnsings-71]

SOBS AT THIS

Anytime I stay up past midnight I start thinking 9-1-1 plot points and make myself cry.

For example that hug Eddie gives Bobby in s2 after Peppa picked Chris up. I’m sure it has already been talked about but THAT was the first time someone supported Eddie so he could take care of his son.

Bobby walks in and Eddie is ready to defend himself, his decision. But Bobby immediately validates Eddie’s decision and gives him his support.

“I had nowhere to take him.”

“Yes you did. Here. Buck gave me a heads up and I cleared it up with the chief.”

Can you imagine? Coming from 2 years of constantly being corrected and challenged with every choice you make for your kid. Constantly being made to feel like a bad dad and incompetent. Then you get to this place and this person of authority that is Dad shaped tells you “you made the right choice , and I cleared the path for you to take this choice”

He wanted to be a firefighter because he missed the camaraderie. He needed to feel like people had his back again. But I don’t think he ever imagined to what extent the 118 would give him that.

Bobby being a Dad is so special to me. Eddie got home that day. He finally got home.

[buddierecs]

secret relationship buddie fics

all of these are general audience, teen and up or not rated (no smut) make sure to kudos/comment on these amazing works :)

our love is all we need (to make it through) by: chimneysrebar "buck and eddie decide to hide their relationship from their friends. It goes about as well as you would expect" word count: 3.1k important tags: sleepy cuddles, eddie diaz loves evan buckley, firehouse 118 crew as family, fluff

no thing defines a man like love that makes him soft by: justhockey “i don’t think you need a dad, that’s not how families work, right? like, they all look different,” chris says. “but it’s okay if you want one. there’s nothing wrong with that.” “what’s it like, having two?” denny asks, and buck has to cover his mouth so he doesn’t give himself away. christopher’s laugh is loud, and sweet, and tugs on buck’s heartstrings in the same way that it always has done. he doesn’t even hesitate to say, “it’s fun. i love them.” word count: 4k important tags family fluff, soft eddie diaz, christopher diaz has two dads, firehouse crew as family it's golden, like daylight by: rarakiplin "the sun comes up" word count: 8.7k important tags: getting together, weddings, fluff, first dates when you come home by: 7ate9 "buck was surviving. that was the least he could do. survive with his son, his new position as a probationary firefighter, while his fiance was overseas. it was too painful to talk about. so no one could know." word count: 19k important tags: army!eddie diaz, reunions, firehouse 118 crew as family, engaged!evan buckley/eddie diaz don't tell my husband (he'll kill me) by: coupe_de_foudre all bobby has to say, as buck is hightailing it towards danger, is a low, threatening, “don’t make me call eddie.” and buck will skid to a stop, pause, and eventually turn around and slink back towards the team like a scolded dog with his tail between his legs." word count: 2.6k important tags: army!eddie diaz, hurt/comfort, light angst, married buddie, pov outsider blindspot by ashwinmeird "hen was starting to accept that buck's life would always be a mystery to her and the others. Then the 136 gets a new probie, eddie diaz, and buck doesn't appear to be the guy's biggest fan. but there's something, some secret, hen isn't privy to and she was going to get to the bottom of whatever was happening between buck and eddie." word count: 10k important tags: alternative universe, pov outsider, oblivious, confusion, relationship reveal

give me a sign, i want you next to me by: 42hrb the 118 knows buck has a really cute kid and a partner he loves, they just think that partner is his husbands ex. word count: 7k important tags: army!eddie diaz, different first meeting au, married buddie, evan buckley and shannon diaz friendship, family fluff and the winner is.... by: heartsdalliances "when maddie convinces buck to join her and the rest of the couples of the 118 on a couples game-show with eddie as his partner, he does so hesitantly, if only because he knows that by the end of it -- the rest of the team will realize he and Eddie are way more than best friends." word count: 18k important tags: game show, fluff, angst, 118 team as family

there's a rumor going around (about me and you) by: justhockey “$100 says he’s not taking a girl home tonight,” eddie wagers. all four of them look at him with stunned looks on their faces, as if they can’t possibly believe eddie is being so stupid. eddie shrugs, holds his arms out in a take it or leave it kind of gesture. of course, they all think he’s insane, so -- “deal,” athena says." word count: 3.1k important tags bets and wagers, drinking, clingy!eddie diaz, karaoke, coming out, flirting welcome to the family by: shutupheather "eddie gets hurt on the job. the team meets and comforts his husband in the hospital waiting room." word count: 3.4k important tags: married buddie, alternative universe, hurt!eddie diaz, worried!evan buckley finally found it right here by: justhockey "he just wants to sleep. but then eddie is placing a gentle hand on his shoulder and shaking. - “buck, what did you just say?” - buck huffs out a sigh. “i said maddie is in lab-“ - Oh fuck. word count: 3.4k important tags: coming out, babies, fluff

explicit rated secret relationship fics mature rated secret relationship fics

[deeplyobsessed]

ok so i’m gonna ramble in sections

section 1: cgi moustache

FUCKING HILARIOUS like it was so bad it was funny HELP also buck’s hair was season 8 hair too it’s so funny like WHY did they reuse this HAHA

section 2: confession part 1

as short of a scene as it was, this was really nicely shot imo. and the tears in eddie’s eyes when he spoke like RYAN GUZMAN UR SO GOOD. but also how does buck (best friend) rank about girlfriend like hmmmmmmm

section 3: FUCKING ABBY

I CLOCKED IT I KNEW IT i know we always joke about 911 having continuity issues but THIS was such a good way to call back season 1 like insane writing tim minear and i love u for it

section 4: the divorce call

i wish they did more with this call like there was potential to call back to eddie/shannon but they didn’t. other than that i think honestly this is one of the grossest calls they’ve ever been on like genuinely icked the hell out of me with the guts like ugh gross

section 5: josh’s speech

as much as people hate on tommy, i do think josh’s explanation of things does give some sort of context to the way tommy acted in the past. like yeah racism and sexism is bad don’t get me wrong, but tommy did make an effort to change. it’s just that with society and his own work place back then, tommy prob had a lot of internalised homophobia that he expressed negatively outward to others (chim and hen in particular). but josh made a very good point with his speech about pre glee and post glee world (great reference, 10/10) and i think this was one of my favourite parts of this episode

section 6: confession part 2

ok first of all there was literally NO NEED to add that “im straight” “im celibate” part. like that was intentionally written into the script for something bcos that entire section could have been done without the sexuality mention. tim minear i see you. other than that FATHER BRIAN YOU ARE SPEAKING FACTS. my fav line he said was “but we can’t take care of others if we don’t first take care of ourselves”. bcos this is true!! and also a line used in therapy a lot cough. anyway i think the conversation eddie had with the priest was like a wake up call to eddie to start getting his head out of his ass and start working towards something. love this scene 10/10

section 7: brothers and pipes

most of this call was focused on the brothers part more than the well scene call back, tho there was a throw away line from bobby to eddie about how (eddie) wouldn’t fit this time. i do wonder if this happened irl would fire departments legally be authorised to allow children to help with rescues tho. otherwise honestly this was a very cute scene that helped chim get some introspection. i do wish there was more of a well scene call back tho :(

section 8: buck tommy breakup

as a buddie fan, i am overjoyed. but as a buck fan, i am devastated. tommy is actually one of my favourite love interests for buck, and its not just because he’s a dude and sexual awakening all that. i genuinely do think buck and tommy could have had a lot of potential if the show had decided to go through with it, but at the same time ending it here was also a relatively good note. i think in this relationship it wasn’t actually buck who wasn’t ready, it was tommy. tommy is afraid of things not working out in the long run bcos he doesn’t believe in buck’s affection for him being long term. this whole breakup was bcos tommy wasn’t ready imo. i do see the point tommy was trying to make but i also think it was a bit of a dick move to do the whole breakup immediately after buck asked tommy to move in with him. like the timing could have been better tommy. tommy being the one who decided to end things did surprise me tho. but now i feel really sad for buck bcos buck did like tommy a lot, and also as a queer person your first queer relationship is always going to mean a lot to you

section 9: MADNEY MADNEY MADNEY

HOLY MOTHER OF- i didn’t see this coming i didn’t but i am so here for it. the amount of trust and communication between chim and maddie is literal relationship GOALS like they lay out the boundaries and have healthy discussions about having another kid and it’s just so UGHHHH I LOVE YOU also maddie already being pregnant FJSJCKSK MORE BABIES

section 10: eddie, the moustache, and the dance

this. was. everything. the significance of shaving off the moustache. the dancing at the end?? no pants too was a choice. like when eddie flops back onto the couch and you see his smile, it’s like you truly see him deciding to finally forgive himself. maybe not completely, because there’s always going to be some guilt he carries around, but he’s moving forward and i’m so, so happy for him. it’s just a fun goofy feel good scene and i love love love this.

special mention: buddie and the couch

i actually think this is the first time both of them are on the couch together. like sitting next to each other with no one else. RETURN OF THE COUCH THEORY WELCOME BACK. ok but the ending scene?? the way they don’t even need words to communicate like- buck not even bothering to question why eddie doesn’t have pants, and eddie not even questioning why buck is here with beer in the first place. the level of mutual understanding has my HEART IN PIECES

overall this is honestly my fav ep this season and one of my fav eps of all time. i can’t wait to see how the story moves on from here ahhhhhhh

[transryanguzman]

the one thing that just makes me feral is when people imply that eddie doesn’t care about christopher and never considers him about any decision he ever makes when actually part of the problem is that at times he considers christopher to a fault and to his own detriment. he has made one shitty, horrible, selfish decision in like 5 years (bc i can’t ignore fight club arc, obviously) and it blew up in his face. my man saw a woman who looked exactly like his dead wife and idk WHO would act normally in that scenario, but having a little insanity about it probably makes him a bad boyfriend but NOT a bad man and definitely not a bad father.

this is not me saying chris doesn’t have the right to be angry. he does. i do think it’s been 3 months and at this point what is going on in el paso that he still won’t say 2 words to his father and i think eddie’s parents can shoulder some of the blame for continuing the cycle of diazes just running away from their problems instead of trying to face them.

i saw someone say that eddie hadn’t even tried with his son. that he hadn’t been genuine or vulnerable and that is just. he literally knelt on the ground in front of him heart open and said you are my son and i love you and you can always come home i will always love you. what more could you ask for with vulnerability. we don’t know what has happened in these three months. i don’t think a silly little party is the only contact he’s tried to make. it was just his latest attempt. it’s clear apologies aren’t working. it’s clear chris doesn’t want an explanation. so what is he going to do besides continue to show chris that he’s here even if chris doesn’t want to hear it.

and let’s be real. helena has thought from day one eddie was unfit to raise christopher on his own. this has just given her true ammo to feel like she’s right. who knows what she’s saying, maybe not even directly to chris, but where chris can hear, about BOTH of his parents because she hated shannon too. as someone with a shitty manipulative grandmother who did something very similar to my own mom with my old brother i just feel like even if she doesn’t realize it she is not even trying to do what’s best for ANYONE in this situation except for herself.

anyway, tldr, eddie diaz is a good man and a good father and he loves his son more than anything in this entire god damn world. he said years ago he would fight for him and he’s doing it in the best way he knows how - by showing his son he’s still there.

my man fucked up. he went a little insane and did some messy dumb shit. but he is NOT a bad person and fucking up doesn’t make you a bad parent. i can’t help but wonder if that’s part of the problem tho. that now chris has to see his dad as a human who fucks up and not just a hero who saves people. and that’s a hard fucking lesson to learn.

[illumonated]

heres the long awaited top 10 kotlc characters list from 3 years ago, complete with commentary by current me!

10. Biana Vacker—

I wasn't a huge fan of her up until book three, when a lot of things changed. IDK why but she just got a lot of better then. She's a great character who can be independent and girly.

didnt bring up nf once fake biana fan

9. Dex Dizznee

Yes, Dex is only #9. The character everyone wants more of, is my #9. Here's the thing with Dex. He's a fun character who is vital to the plot in Everblaze and Unlocked. But that doesn't forgive him for Nightfall. Like- you cant crush on your cousin. They very well could be biological, but I'll get to that later. [ accidentally spoiling list intensifies ]

But aside from that, I really like his character. I think the way he hates Fitz in the start is funny and relat—, his interactions with Sophie and his siblings are very cute and wholesome, and his personality matches his ability really well. He kinda just reminds me of Varian from the Tangled series.

what the hell is this??

8. Fintan Pyren

Haha yep I just ranked the 2nd most active threat above Dex. I'm going to prison for this one. bEfore you leave your hate comments, hear me out.

Fintan is easily the most entertaining villain in KOTLC, while posing as an active threat. What more could I want in a villain? Plus Pintrest has decided that he is, in fact, a theatre kid. This is single-handedly the most accurate hc ever.

Also he reminds me so much of Jason Dean don't @ me.

and i would still rank fin above dex tbh

JASON DEAN? WHY WE CALLING JD HEATHERS BY HIS GOVERNMENT NAME

7. Edaline Ruewen

If you know me, you know I am very possibly the only person who thinks Grady and Edaline are massively underappreciated. Because they are. I have been advocating for a spin-off for these two because of the lack of page time they have.

With that said, OH MY GOSH I LOVE EDALINE. She is such a good mom. I think it's perfect how Shannon wrote her. Her chemistry with Grady invented wholesomeness. I said it. SOKEEFE WILL NEVER BE THIS GOOD-

This isn't the only instance where the incorrect quotes put a character so high on a list, trust me, but the incorrect quotes for her are so funny.

dude this is insane worl

6. Councillor Bronte

Bronte is my favorite Councillor. I said it. After flashback, I decided that Kenric isn't g o o d — Like why did u do that why-

But this isn't about him. This is about Bronte. I'm shocked I enjoy the adults as much as I do in this series. Councillor Bronte may be one of the funniest characters ever. I may actually like him more than Snape. I think I do tbh, because we don't learn 6 1/2 books in he's not awful!

ykw this is valid i still love bronte. such a hater in those early books

5. Linh Song

If everyone was like Linh, the world would be a happier place. UP UNTIL [ spoilers ] UNLOCKED WHEN THE CLIFFHANGER HIT HAHAHA NOPE-

But aside from that, Linh's great. Her and Tam are sibling goals. The way she stayed optimistic after Exillium makes her character even better, and her getting more worried after Tam joins the Neverseen all the more heartbreaking and understandable.

I love her chemistry with Marella, they're such a cute couple!

I'm just getting word they're not actually together. Uhhhhhh.

Overall, great character.

dont shoot me but i dont think shes in top 10 anymore

4. Iggy the Imp

[ laughter ] I CANT ACTUALLY BELIEVE I JUST RANKED IGGY OVER LINH-

Remember when I said that the incorrect quotes/tumbler fandom made characters better? Yeah I was talking about Iggy. The theories surrounding him are the funniest things ever. I haven't lost my mind haha, I'm just aware Iggy is amazing.

TOP THREE BABY!!! I think if you know me, you know which characters are in my top three.

what the hell me!!

3. Marella Redek

Where to start. She needs more page time. Honestly, she's so funny with being gossipy. Imagine if she met Dolores from Encanto.

I'm genuinely sad that she was written off for three/four books, even though when she came back in Nightfall, it was great to progress the plot. She's so well-written, and I can't wait for her to be relevant in book nine with Linh's plot.

2. Grady Ruewen

I'm not kidding guys, he's my second favorite. I especially love the fact Shannon gives him a huge part every three books just to write him off again! I'm not complaining, his character arcs in Everblaze and Nightfall were great and I totally cried lmao.

Exhibit A: WHOLESOMENESS WITH EDALINE MY HEART ALBFALDHALSHHDALDV.

Him and Edaline actually have the best dynamic in the book, IDC if you wanna fight.

Exhibit B: 'That boy.'

After Unlocked, I think he's gonna play a huge part in book nine. Particularly, with the Keefe stuff, since He was the last person Keefe saw before Keefe ran off. It's especially great, because we can infer that he was like Keefe. EDALINE WAS HIS SOPHEORHAPHDAHDKALAGD

Y'all underestimate how much I love this couple.

Plus he's such a good dad. I still won't forgive those monsters who think that Jolie is Glimmer.

dude i was in such denial he was fs my favorite i just didn't wanna admit it

1. Tam Song

TAM <333 oh gosh where to start. I have no words. His character arc is perfect. I am worried for the next book. I'm worried that we won't get back pre-neverseen tam. Let's talk about that?

This is mostly because of his character arc, his sibling relationship with Linh, and rivalry to friendship to, if Shannon is daring enough, love, with Keefe.

also valid still love tam but idk if hes top three

Yeah that's my list.

gosh i've been watching too much Schaffrillas Productions.

still tru

current top ten:

10. Umber

9. Vespera

8. Biana

7. Fitz

6. Tam

5. Bronte

4. Fintan

3. Marella

2. Edaline

1. Grady

[screaming-universe]

HI so I was thinking about your amazing mer Buddietommy art again and wanted to know if you have thoughts about the backstory you could share 👀 obviously some things might be spoilers but I am sooooo curious!!!

Ahhh thank you!!! 🧡 (and please pretend that I didn't take forever to answer t.t )

Since I don't think I'll ever write/draw this fic, I might as well make a looong post about it.

The guys: Tommy is a lighthouse keeper on an island in the middle of nowhere (lighthouse keeper cause some people of my acquaintance (@buffaluff) are lighthouse enjoyers :3). Buck is a whale shark mer, Eddie is a lion fish mer (in german, their name translates to fire fish, I couldn't resist that ^^).

The setting: Merfolk are known but there is no real interaction between them and humans, due to prejudices and also violence. Mers live in settlements in shallower waters (I do want them to be out of easy reach of humans but also have some sunlight which does limit how deep these settlements could be. Maybe there's bioluminescent algae or something?) in democratic societies led by councils. Bobby and Athena are probably on the council of the settlement where Buck and Eddie live. On average, female mers are bigger than male mers (there's gorgeous mer art by @chaussettecanape that really solidified that worldbuilding decision for me!). They have gills but also lungs and do spend some time on land to sun themselves but certainly spend most of their time in the sea. Fighting fires isn't really a thing in the sea, but first aid and rescuing people would still make sense, so the 118 would still have jobs in that general area. Just without engines and so on.

Stuff that's happened in the past: Eddie was part of the guard of a settlement further south, where he grew up. Mers often fight with trident and spears; one time Eddie and other guards clashed with another group and Eddie got stabbed by a trident in the left shoulder and and by a spear in the left wrist. Another trident messed up the frills on the right side of his tail. Some time after that, (parts of) Eddie's family moved to the settlement where they currently live. Shannon probably lives in this AU and her and Eddie are back to being very good friends. (Shannon and Chris both have whale shark tails. Abuela also has a lion fish tail) Now since there are no engines, there's no engine to pin Buck's leg to the ground. Also no leg. What does happen though, is that Buck's fluke got pinned by an anchor and he loses the left side of it. He gets a prosthetic for it.

Eddie and Buck get together before the actual plot picks up.

Now to the story itself:

I have actually written the very beginning of chapter 1:

It is quite windy when Tommy goes out for his daily walk. The waves crash high on the rocky little island that’s been his home for the past six months. So he knows better than to go down to the jetty, instead he walks along the high ridge to the far part of the island. Around him the seabirds are calling as they race through the sky. It could have been a day like any other—most days are when you work as a lighthouse keeper. But instead he hears voices. Voices. Tommy is supposed to be alone on this island. The first time he hears them he tells himself it’s a trick of the wind and his loneliness. But then he hears them again… And of course he goes to investigate. There’s not much new on the island and if Tommy is going insane then he’d rather know sooner than later. But no: there definitely are voices. Because there are people. Tommy steps around a rock and then he sees them: three persons but none of them human, though partly humanoid. They are mers and one of them is a child. And the child is stuck in a tide pool, some twenty feet away from the sea. Another mer, one with a fiery red tail, is crawling towards them while a third struggles to climb the up and onto the island. There is no beach here, no gradual slope. Just rocks worn so smooth that they offer barely a grip.

And here it is as a (badly photographed) comic sketch:

I haven't settled on why Chris gets stuck on the island. Maybe because of a big wave that surprises him, maybe he went there when the tide was in and then missed the point to go back to the sea. However it happens: he's now stuck in a tide pool. Buck helps Eddie to scramble up the rocks but it's not easy for mers to move on land and Eddie struggles to help Chris. And that's when Tommy arrives. The mers - especially Buck - are very wary of him since humans do sometimes hunt mers. I'm not sure if they could understand each other? Mers should have another language entirely but I also want them to be able to communicate easily. Magic??? Anyway, Tommy helps Eddie get Chris back into the sea, at no small risk to himself. The mers disappear quickly and Tommy is left wondering if this really happened.

The next day though, he finds a necklace where he saw the mers and he's pretty sure that it wasn't there before. Then he sees a mer (Eddie) in the distance and he thinks it might belong to him. Tommy fastens the necklace to the jetty in a way that it can easily be retrieved from a person in the sea but won't fall off on its own. When he comes back later, the necklace is gone.

Over the next weeks, Tommy sometimes spots a mer in the distance, watching him. Or two mers. Mostly it's Eddie who is curious about him, though Buck sometimes comes along to glare some. Eddie gets closer and closer to the island until one day Tommy's on the jetty and there's a mer mere feet away from him. Buck is jealous and possessive and he doesn't get why Eddie keeps seeking out this human, it's dangerous! (except he does know, possibly more than Eddie does, he just doesn't want to admit it to himself) Eddie (and Chris) visit Tommy regularly and Buck sometimes joins them and despite his best efforts, he is starting to be charmed by Tommy.

And then, one day as they are swimming to the island, Eddie is hit by a harpoon and dragged out of the water and into a boat. Buck doesn't know what to do; he is chased off by harpoons and spears, and he knows he could not get on the boat. However, Tommy's island is close and due to everything that just went down, Buck isn't sure if Tommy might be involved in it. (It's not that far-fetched: fearing abduction and captivity is a reason why mers are generally wary of humans. And Buck and Eddie have been visiting Tommy for weeks/months now; it would be easy to tell somebody where to find them) Tommy's on the jetty, expecting them, but before he can even smile at the approaching mer, he is dragged into the sea. It doesn't take long though until Buck believes Tommy that he doesn't know anything about these mer hunters. Buck takes Tommy along as he goes to search for the boat, and Tommy, completely soaked through and freezing, manages to climb onto it and free Eddie. Eddie of course is badly wounded and they are very slow to escape from the boat, since Buck has to support Eddie and make sure that Tommy doesn't drown at the same time. Just when it seems like the hunters will catch up to them again, Athena and more of the guard arrive and the trio is hustled away to safety. The doctors can patch Eddie up but think it would be better if he could recuperate on land, to keep the wound dry. Now luckily, Buck knows an island that is save and that's how Eddie ends up in Tommy's bathtub. He hates the lack of mobility and misses Chris and Buck, even if he enjoys spending so much time with Tommy (who's hauling up many buckets of sea water every day).

I'm not quite sure how it happens, but Buck and Eddie and Tommy get together. Tommy goes swimming with them:

Tommy stops and looks back to his lighthouse for some reason. Evan and Eddie just want him to go swimming with them but this moment feels somehow important, like a point of no return. Of course he knows the legends and stories of merfolk seducing humans—especially men—to join them into the sea to then drown them. But Tommy has been with them in the sea before, once, and he has been close enough to the sea that either Buck or Eddie, especially both together, could have easily overwhelmed him to drag him into the sea. And of course they were just that: stories. Any reputable source he could find told him that it was just bullshit prejudice and that was it. So he’s sure that it’s not this kind of point of no return—what is it then? Instead of trying to figure this feeling out, he turns back to the two men in the sea who are calling out to him as they splash each other with water like they aren’t already mostly submerged in it.

(I didn't add the harpoon scar but I think this fits best here, not like I'm very set on the timeline either ^^')

They tell him about the settlement under the sea and he says that he wishes that he could see it but he knows he can't. Or so he thinks. One day, as they swim to Tommy, Buck expresses that he wishes that Tommy was a mer so they could spend more time together and do more things together. Tommy goes swimming with them, when he suddenly gets pulled into the sea. Before they really know what's happening, he is a mer.

They take him to the settlement and everything seems perfect until it looks like Buck gets struck by lightning (it's not real lightning) and then is in a coma. As it turns out, when Buck said that he wishes that Tommy was a mer, something magical I have not yet thought about more hears him and makes it come true. And now Buck is paying the prize. He gets stuck in a strange world and idk what happens but he's getting out of it again and that's how he "pays" for Tommy's transformation.

Maybe there's some additional angst after he finds out that he accidentally made Tommy a mer and what if Tommy didn't want that to happen??? (Tommy didn't think it would be possible but he sure is not complaining ^^ he's got nothing keeping him on land anyway) The three of them + Chris start to figure out how to live together and Tommy learns how to be a mer.

And I think that's everything, I hope you like it! 🧡

[lesbianrobin]

the Way I would Totally Read the BuckAbby fic you just described,, concept so delicious, but so curious how and if maddie coming back and or eddie joining the 118 would have any impact at all!! esp cuz maddie's return had her be like this is my brother's longest relationship and i can't help but notice she hasn't been there for most of it

but what if she is there??? and the people around buck can kinda tell she's checking out but stayin g out of guilt, and like what do you even say that at that point???

and like does lawsuit play into this? THE POSSIBILITIES

RIGHTTTTT like oh my god. the maddie-abby dynamic would be INSANE.

so i think maddie is actually like. the first thing that makes abby stick around. like suddenly this sister shows up and she's clearly fleeing an abusive relationship so abby's like ok well i shouldn't just ditch him rn he didn't ditch me when my mother got worse! and she figures she'll hang around until maddie gets settled in la. and at this point maddie's mostly just intrigued by this woman that her brother's in a serious relationship with like i think she's excited to get to know her!

and then just when abby thinks that she's good to go, maddie gets kidnapped. and as soon as she thinks enough time has passed since maddie's kidnapping, buck gets ladder trucked. etc etc. and somewhere along the way the buck/abby relationship gets just poisoned with resentment and buck refuses to see it meanwhile everyone else but Especially maddie is like buck... this is Not Good... and i think that maddie actually becomes extremely anti-abby because after her experience with doug she's like sorry but Zero tolerance for unhealthy relationship dynamics with my baby brother. and this isn't me saying i think abby becomes abusive or anything just that i think the relationship becomes very unhealthy and maddie's sensitive to that which perhaps drives a wedge between her and buck as maddie tries to ask prodding questions and he gets defensive of his relationship.

also. this is gonna sound very bold but i think witnessing a relationship where one party is obviously staying entirely out of guilt and obligation might have gotten eddie on the divorce train with shannon sooner. like i'm not saying it would have butterfly effect saved her life but i Do think it could have potentially aided eddie in his processing of their marriage after her death.

re: lawsuit here's the thing. i do think that at some point abby hits her limit and she just Leaves. like she can't face buck and say it so she straight up just leaves him a note and dips. and i think it might be incredibly likely that this limit comes after the tsunami. it's like a Sign for abby yknow this insane natural disaster occurs and she's like ok there's literally Never gonna be a good time to leave him i just have to bite the bullet and Do It. plus assuming she was working during the tsunami i see her being like i am DONE with this fuckass hell job.

so. now i am imagining lawsuit era buck except he is also trying to process the fact that his girlfriend of like two years just left him without even having the courtesy to break up with him to his face. and the humiliating realization that everyone around him saw it coming before he did and Told him and he insisted they were wrong. GOD. wow. okay.

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Time travel? Count me in!!!

🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️🌤️

YAY!

1k for Promising Light!:

---

Buck tries to make a list of what he knows here. They are not in 2024 anymore. By how long? Buck has no idea. He and Eddie presumably live in another house. Where? He’s not sure. They’re married. Which is insane, because as Eddie has confirmed several times this morning, he’s straight. So explain that one. And, also, they have a son together. Increasingly insane. 

He wonders if they got platonically married. Like a marriage pact or something. Non-romantic. They both wanted stability and a kid, maybe? Decided to move forward in some prearranged agreement together? Platonically. That’s the only explanation Buck can think of for Eddie. Not for himself. Actually… The thought of being married to Eddie in just a normal romantic way? That’s pretty great. Which is a surprise to realize. He’s never even considered it before, on account of first not knowing he’d want to marry a man, and second the whole Eddie being straight thing. 

Suddenly, Buck finds himself gripped with a need for answers. He needs to know what is real here. Are they in the actual future or an insane alternate reality where Buck gets things he won’t actually ever have in his real life? He has to know. And there’s, unfortunately, only one person with any sort of answers at the current moment. Even if he’s too tiny to press for answers. Buck needs to get this kid talking. 

“Hey, buddy,” he says to the boy in Eddie’s arms. 

The boy turns his head to look at Buck. 

“You must be hungry, huh? Do you want breakfast?”

“Yes, please,” he says in a tiny voice.

“Oh, so polite,” Buck smiles at him. “Okay, what do you want to eat?” 

🌤️

Eddie is kind of freaking out. 

Which, he supposes, he’s entitled to. There are a lot of freak out worthy things happening at the moment. Not least of all the seeming time travel. But really, at the forefront of his mind, is his son. And not the unfamiliar but very cute child that has appeared out of nowhere. But Christopher. He needs to know where Christopher is. Before he figures out any of the rest of this - the marriage to a man of it all - he needs to find his son.

So Eddie does some light investigation while Buck familiarizes himself with a strange kitchen to make their mystery child scrambled eggs. Buck has gone from silent and choked up to very chatty with the kid. And Eddie gets it. This boy is the only one who knows anything. So while Eddie searches for information in one way, Buck does in another. 

He scans the fridge for art while Buck searches for which cupboard stores their - their - frying pans. There’s a green and red construction paper Christmas tree stuck to the fridge with a Los Angeles Fire Department magnet. It has marker-drawn ornaments and in the bottom corner of the trunk, in messy lettering, a name. Nico. Eddie looks at the kid, then looks back at the name on the paper tree. Nico. It suits his face. Is it short for Nicolas? Eddie doesn’t have anyone in his life named Nicolas that they - they - would have named him after. Did they choose it because it sounds good with Christopher? Christopher and Nicolas. Chris and Nico. It does sound good. Eddie has never once thought about what he would name a second child. He hasn’t thought about another child since the moment Shannon asked for a divorce. But he thinks, if this is at all real and not a shared delusion, that he and Buck did a good job on the name front. 

“Nico,” Eddie says out loud. Like he’s trying to get the kid’s attention. But, really, he just wants to communicate this information to Buck. 

Buck and Nico both look at him. 

“Yeah?” Nico asks. 

“This is a really good tree,” Eddie compliments. He lifts the craft from the fridge to show it to Buck, pointing at the name with his index finger. Buck’s mouth parts a little, understanding hitting him.

“Thank you!” Nico says. “You told me that already, Dad.”

“Well, it’s just so good I had to say it again,” Eddie replies, winking at him. He’s got practice appeasing a little kid. It’s so much easier at this age. They’re so damn sweet. 

“Nico,” Buck echoes, trying out the name in his mouth.

Nico turns to look at him. 

“I like the art, too!” Buck adds quickly when he sees Nico waiting for him to say something.

“Thank you!” 

“You’re crafting above your grade level, I bet,” Buck says. 

Nico furrows his brows. “I’m in kindergarten.” 

Oh, Eddie sees what Buck is doing.

“That’s what I’m saying!” Buck nods. “I bet a first grader couldn’t make that tree as well as you did.”

Nico giggles, pleased. Eddie can see a resemblance to Buck entirely. It makes Eddie feel a little warm. He wants to pay attention to that feeling right now but he’s still missing info on Chris.

“How many more days until we do our tree?” Nico asks. 

“Uh…” Buck struggles. “What day is it today?”

“Saturday!” Nico laughs, like Buck has asked the dumbest question on earth.

“Oh, right. Saturday,” Buck answers. “Um… Well, then… Soon?”

“How many sleeps?” Nico asks. 

Oh, see. Now is Eddie’s moment.

“Well, we can’t put up the tree without Chris, can we?” He asks. 

This is a risk. He knows it as soon as he asks. Buck shoots him a nervous look. 

Nico huffs, like this is the answer he dreaded hearing. “But when is he coming?”

Eddie feels a twinge of relief. “Hmm… Uh, should I call him?”

Buck’s eyes widen with surprise. Shit. Is Eddie really making a mistake with this? 

But Nico looks delighted. “Yes! Yes! Make him come today.” 

If Eddie was successful at making his son come home when he wanted him to, his life would be going a hell of a lot differently, now wouldn’t it? But of course, he doesn’t say this to Nico.

[doodle-do-wop]

Side note before the question, but because I go to search instead of going to my following list, you're like my number one search haha. But anyways, I'm curious what's your favorite kotlc ship? My guess is Copper Mares but if its another one, or if I'm right, I would still like to hear! (And feel free to defend, I'm sure all your ideas for said ship are really cute and romantic)

lol you got me, yeah my favorite KOTLC ship is Copper Mares BUT I'm also a really big fan of Wild Raynes (Vika and Timkin) BECAUSE IM INSANE ABOUT THE HEKS AND SHANNON DOESN'T GIVE THEM THE SCREENTIME THEY DESERVE CAUSE WAHT DO YOU MEAN VIKA NEVER PICKED UP A SINGLE MATCH LIST UNTIL SHE MET TIMKIN AND HE WAS NEAR THE TOP OF HER VERY FIRST LIST????

I need more Heks lore than I do Keefe's Legacy lore. I would trade the entirety of Unravled for a detailed history of the Heks family because HOW are they not as high up in status as the Vackers or even the ever popular Ruewens? Yes Fallon was a Councilor (one of the original three) and the Ruewen's were beloved by all BUT THE HEKS SAVED THE BLOODY UNICORNS FROM NEAR EXSTINCTION???? THEY REHABILITATED AND SAVED THE ONLY MALE ALICORN IN ALL OF EXSISTENCE????? THEY DIDN'T JUST SAVE ONE SPECIES OF EQUINE THEY SAVED TWO!! WITHOUT SILLA HEKS(the woman who was entrusted by the council to rehabilitate Greyfell) SILVENY WOULDN'T HAVE ANOTHER ALICORN TO TALK TO OR BE WITH. WYNN AND LUNA WOULDN'T EVEN EXSIST HAD IT NOT BEEN FOR SILLA HEKS.

Also Vika running the ranch ON TOP of being A BLOODY REGENT???? AND A MOTHER?! Call her Barbie the way she's juggling more careers than I think is physically possible. She's got the ranch running like it's brand spanking new as well as handling Council missions and who knows what else? No wonder Stina's a nerdy busy body SHE'S HER MOTHER'S MINI ME

ALSO TIMKIN???? mr Faked My Ability So Well The Government Got Mad And BANINSHED ME AT 14~(ish)??? Mister Survived On My Fucking Own in the Netural Territories????? Mister Graduated From Exillium AND Managed To SOMEHOW Get Back Into The Lost Cities And Graduate With My Old Foxfire Classmates????? HE GRADUATED!!! AS A TALENTLESS MAN! HE WROTE A GODDAMN BOOK (i think) THAT'S PROBABLY BANNED IN THE LOST CITIES??? HE'S PART OF A REBELLION GROUP AND yeah okay he's kinda treated as a grunt which like i don't know if its because Timkin himself was like 'Fork Face I'm a father, I can't be risking my life this hard when I've got a wife and kids at home' or if the Black Swan also has workplace discrimination

ALSO ALSO WHAT DO YOU MEAN STINA IS FULLY AWARE HER DAD IS A REBEL AND LITERALY MAKES SNIDE REMARKS ABOUT IT AS IF SHE'S BEING PETTY THAT SOPHIE GETS TO GO TO THE SCHOOL DANCE AND NOT RISKING HER GODDAMN NECK FOR AN OLD WRINKLY WINDBAG(forkle)

I need the entire love story about Vika and Timkin because talk about forbidden love! A woman possibly at the start of the biggest career of her life! Inheriting a ranch that had been through 7 ish generations of hardworking Hekses all started by possibly the most famous Heks of all (besides Silla) and then meeting a man who has less than nothing to his name yet everything about him is scandal after steaming hot scandal? Meeting in darkness to hide their affections from prying eyes until they found a way to be together in a way that wouldn't risk the ranch's demise. The harsh whispers they would have to brace themselves against knowing no one would ever stop trying to pry into the mystery they dropped upon the whole of the Lost Cities at their union. The whispers they knew their children would have to bear.

The Heks have CENTURIES of being known as the family for equine care AND YET THE COUNCIL GAVE SILVENY TO SOPHIE FUCKING FOSTER???????? (who was the first to say 'what if we took the horse' i need to know who thought it was such a good idea and how they convinced the others to grab cloaks and try cause it clearly backfired)

AND FUCK YOU SOPHIE YOU UNRELIABLE NARRATOR! Your dumb sparkly bratty horse wouldn't even have her twins if Vika and Stina hadn't helped you. Yeah the troll thingy kept them alive but there were more complications than that and you just brushed past all of it??

Heks history save me (we dont talk about the fact that i made up an entire history for the Heks family and how Vika and Timkin met, damn you shannon you bastard)

[lover-of-mine]

What is your sunlight theory about?

Hi, baby, buckle up, because this one is crazy. I don't know if you're familiar with the construction on sunset theory, I'll link some posts that will explain that better than I can here and here, but basically, you have the way everything about Ana in season 4 and the beginning of that relationship, happens around Sunset Boulevard, and you have the way Eddie is late coming back from the date in 4x08 because "there was construction on sunset" and he had to take a detour and then Buck and Eddie proceed to have one of the most domestic buddie scene in the show, all that after the most awkward date ever with Ana, created this whole "Ana was a detour on Eddie's way to Buck" (particularly, I love this as someone who views the shooting as Eddie's oh moment, and I know the show is gonna take that away from me, but it will be my truth until they do) and considering we as a fandom like to take things and run with them, that became a whole thing because Eddie has some sun imagery attached to him when it comes to relationships, which is definitely not just about Buck, even more with the way he's sitting on the sunset reading Shannon's letter, but like, we have the painting on Pepa's house behind Vanessa, stuff like that, but we also have things like Buck using sunset colors to draw his heart on the "I misunderstood the assignment" scene. I have been curious about the sunlight of it all since I wrote this post, because with one episode, and the fact that we don't know if the sun is setting or rising during the locker scene, I couldn't really create a pattern that would lead me anywhere. Then the loft stills leaked. Because then we would have 2 scenes where the sun seems to be important a few episodes apart, but I hadn't really thought about the construction on sunset angle until this picture.

Because paired with the sunset light on Buck's bi awakening, and the sunset light here, I'm making the executive decision that yeah, the sun was setting in the locker room.

I don't want to say Tommy is a detour, Tommy started a huge discovery for Buck that Buck wouldn't realize alone, but an anon pointed out how maybe they hurt Eddie so that he couldn't show up at the loft so that we could have the Tommy, so they quite literally had some detour happening during a sunset, like what the fuck?

But I'm really interested in the blue aspect of the scenes. @stagefoureddiediaz has some really interesting color and costume metas, including one on the use of yellow and blue in season 5, that talks about how yellow is a color used for communication and blue is a color used for, like, introspection, which could mean something interesting is cooking here. Because Buck's shirt in the basketball is blue, his shirt on the loft is blue, Eddie's shirt in the locker room is also blue and Buck's jacket also has blue detailing.

We know Buck and Eddie will have an important conversation, but that associated with the sunset theory, and they were literally on the sunset, I think the sun is finally actually setting now. No more detours. Only the discoveries they need to have in order to work as a couple. Buck's bisexuality is huge on that front, and I don't wanna say Eddie is gonna suddenly look at Buck after he comes out and be like 👀👀👀, but at the same time Eddie "questioning his place in the world" could very much be Eddie looking at Buck and being like "oh, that's an option?" especially if he's having trouble connecting with Marisol (random addon but with the sunset being a detour for Eddie, I think is hysterical that Marisol is named Marisol, because her name sounds like "Mar e Sol" and that's literally "Sea and Sun" in Portuguese, Spanish too but I don't really speak Spanish so it wasn't my initial connection there, and the sun setting on the sea it's a thing, and I feel insane for typing this out, but it's there, her name is the detour), this could mean they are gonna talk, and work through things, and get closer the way Ryan and Oliver keep teasing and reach the conclusion they are meant to be together.

Okay addon you don't know it's an addon because you're seeing this post as a whole thing at once but I hadn't thought to look at other buddie conversations until right now, but that particular pattern of light being present in 2 scenes where we see them finally be honest with each other makes it even more interesting to me really.

Because if you look at Buck's bisexual awakening as a moment of Buck being honest with himself and the locker room as Buck being honest about why he got in the relationship with Natalia, the sun behind Eddie, if it's only behind Eddie, could sparkle Eddie into some honesty himself and about himself, and that's what they need, open and honest communication. Because if yellow is used for communication, the sun could be being used for honesty.

But that's just a theory. A game theory. (sorry I said it out loud and had to add it oskaoskaoskas)

Anyway, that's all I have right now, if you read this I love you 🫶

[thetokentrans]

so I have thoughts about this week's episode of 911. My partner and I ranted at one another when we watched it yesterday, and I need to put my thoughts out into the world. Spoilers under the cut. Also tagged though, just to be safe.

Alright so, I wanna say first that while I've mostly enjoyed this season, some of the arcs and basically all of the pacing has me really frustrated? And not frustrated because of cliffhangers and not frustrated because the writing wants me to be. Frustrated because the pacing has been far too quick - though, I expect the super truncated season is to be blamed for that - but also some of the writing and character arcs just..... Do not fit the vibe of the show up until this season? Plus, the lack of calls/focus on characters personal lives has also got me sad. Like, I love the characters and love seeing the peeks into their loves, but I really hope the show doesn't maintain the equation of one big emergency, a few calls sprinkled through out the season, and then mostly focused on the characters lives because *I* preferred the balance it was before. Or would have been happy with a tiny bit more focus on their personal lives, but not to the extent it is now, know?

Eddie and Kim are a great example. Especially what it culminated to in 7x09. It just makes no God damned sense and does not fit Eddie's characterization in my opinion? It came out of left field. It's a really, really weird god damned story line. I *am* glad that Buck approached Eddie about it AS SOON as he learned about the situation though. Like if it wasn't anything, Eddie... You wouldn't have hid her from Buck OR Marisol. If it wasn't anything, you wouldn't have lied and said you didn't have a gf. And it frustrates me that before this episode, he had been looking back on his relationship with Shannon with such rose colored glasses and forgetting the very large, sort of insurmountable issues that they had. Though that isn't out of character for him, I just hated it. Lol

And the stuff with the councilwoman in this episode also made me insanely angry. And went way too quick. Politicians can grease a lot of wheels but that entire situation - Maria's adoption getting stopped, AND her getting ripped out of their house because their foster license got revoked - really felt like it happened way too quick and should have raised some red flags/encountered some road blocks in the system???

Also I hate that NO ONE outside of Athena seemed to question Bobby's definitely very weird behavior. Like I feel like super anxious to every change in someone's demeanor Buck, and INSANELY perceptive Hen would have picked up that something was wrong????

Also idk man, Athena going to Amir, AND BRINGING HIM INTO HER HOUSE THAT HAS ALL OF THIS EVIDENCE OF HOW GOOD BOBBY HAS IT NOW - even if Bobby doesn't think he deserves it, even if Bobby has been stewing in his self loathing basically since childhood and his dad dying - to help with Bobby's spiralings/self destruction cycle felt a little out of characterly naive of her?

Like.. I don't think he's the one who set the house on fire at the end of the episode - I did at first, but my partner pointed out that it'd be the too obvious choice - but I just don't think either Bobby OR Amir are ready for that. And I feel like history shows, and her characterization shows, that she'd be more perceptive and realize that.

That being said, some things I *liked* about the episode:

Chim getting to clapback at racist homophobic Gerrard (spelling?) at the award ceremony

Bobby telling Buck that he knows Tommy is good for him because Buck hasn't spiraled about their relationship/ranted about it to him.

Buck telling Eddie that he's worried about him. That interaction, Buck calling Eddie out, it felt good and like the 911 I'm used to.

Athena calling Bobby out on his self destruction cycle. I do wish she would have pointed out how often she has leaned on him (as much as a chronically independent woman like her, can anyway) especially when it came to finally solving her fiancé's murder for instance.

Idk man, the show just doesn't feel the same as it has in the past and I'm really hoping it's because of the change in network and is just an adjustment period.

[weanonme]

17 year old Ava Silva is used to not being wanted. The last 10 years of her life have consisted of moving from family to family and house to house and never finding a home. 6 months before her 18th birthday she gets moved to a new family in a small town after a particularly nasty incident caused Ava to be removed from her last family. Ava, who believes that no family will ever want her, has decided that she is going to do her best to keep her head down and just try to survive the last six months she has until she ages out of the system and eventually gets put on the street. Her plan to make no connections with anyone is quickly ruined when the people of this small town she’s been placed in, make her feel more at home than she’s ever felt since her mom died when she was seven.

A poorly written fanfic summary of an Avatrice found family fanfic I would write if I could actually write. If anyone would like to actually write it please go for it! The ideas I had for the story I’ll write below. You obviously don’t have to listen to them and can totally make the story your own but I figured I’d share what I thought of that made me make this post

Jillian and mother superion would be married and the foster parents of Ava. They would already have Michael. I toyed around with the idea of them also having adopted Lilith as a way to make a really nice sisterly bond between her and Ava that would start rocky and then become iron tight. And also as a reason why she would see Beatrice a lot.

Meets the gang at the highschool and gets seated with Beatrice in one of their classes

Really cute like small town vibes. Like everyone knows everyone but it’s only mildly annoying bc most everyone really cares about each other

Bea’s parents still suck tho like a lot so she stays at Lilith’s a lot. They don’t kick her out for being gay though they just are occasionally mean to her and ignore her existence for the most part and have some insane expectations for her

Mary and Shannon dating ofc

Lilith and Camila have some serious crushes on each other.

Beatrice being the one to crack through Ava’s walls first

They have like almost immediate crushes on each other but they’re both extremely guarded so there would be SOOOOOOO MUCH PINING

SLOW BURN

The reason I thought this much about this is because I had this idea of this super intense scene of Ava having this big ass breakdown bc her birthday is nearing and she’s fallen in love with this town and family she’s been put in and she’s had this big realization that she doesn’t want to leave and she gets scared and started pushing everyone away and I had this vision of Suzanne and Jillian and Ava in a living room and Ava was soaking wet bc it was storming and she was coming home way after curfew and they started arguing about her behavior lately and how they love her and they hate seeing her close herself off like she was when she first got there and she breaks down and screams WHY WONT YOU ADOPT ME THEN and immediately the room went quiet and Suzanne walks out of the room and came back with adoption papers and says to her that they did want to adopt her and they were going to ask her the week of her birthday and Jillian said the only reason that hadn’t asked already was they wanted to be sure that it was what Ava wanted too. And then Michael and Lilith appeared bc they were eavesdropping and it became this super sweet moment.

I thought that maybe Jillian could be the town doctor and that maybe Suzanne could work at the school or something

I’m personally kind of a fan of father Vincent and think it would be sick if he had some kind of role

I didn’t have a set Michael age in mind for this really just that Jillian had him before she married Suzanne and that he loves his stepmom so much

Oh Yasmine should definitely be part of the friend group !

That’s all I really had thought of. If someone writes this or just a version of this I think it would be really cool. I seriously wish I had the ability to do it really. If not that is fine too I just hope you guys like the idea!