#seriously though you can only use the ''she was a terrorist!!!'' line so many times

[stairset]

Not to get into Bo-Katan Discourse but the thing about Bo-Katan is that from what I've seen the people who like her are like "yeah she's a complicated person who's been through a lot and has done bad things but has also worked hard to try to make up for them and she's really interesting because of that also mean hot armor lady go brrr" and the people who don't like her are all like "she's an irredeemable bitch who's never done anything good ever and has zero nuance and I will interpret every single thing she ever says and does in the most bad faith way possible and act like every one of her flaws is unique to her and I will not devote this same energy towards other villainous characters who have redemption arcs even though the things they did are either just as bad or way worse than what she did and few of them put in as much work to try and right their wrongs as she did and also I will repeatedly bring up the fact that she was a terrorist as if I'm the only one who is aware of this" so like I'm inclined to lean towards the people who like her on account of they actually view her as a character and also are generally less annoying.

[zalrb]

Skins Rewatch - Maxxie and Anwar

1. Oh, the Russia episode. I have mixed feelings about this episode tbh.

2. These two are really adorable friends though

this episode hurt me.

3. “I thought you were going to put [the drugs] in your turban!” “I don’t wear a turban, Chris.” “I thought you were going to get one especially!” I love these dynamics, I swear.

4. Oh Sid, being used as the drug mule, ofc. 

5. ‘“I’m trying, it’s just that they look SO disappointed when I’m not a terrorist.” I love this show.

6. “Well, you’re a very dull Muslim, Anwar.” Tony, could you just NOT?

7. POSH KENNETH!

8. “Did [your mom] pack you these as well?”

“No, but she packed me this”

THIS IS WHAT FRIENDSHIP LOOKS LIKE, GUYS.

9. “You don’t want to look at the girl with boobs?” “Nah, I prefer Welsh women.” This was the line that sold Chris for my friend, she was all about Sid and then it was Chris.

10. Anwar, you asshole. IT’S SO UPSETTING. And I was happy with how his father ended up handling the whole situation in the end.

11. “I’m not a hobby, Tony, you’re not taking up canoeing here.” I MEAN SERIOUSLY. Also, handled way better than many shows now would do despite there being more LGBTQ+ characters on TV.

12. “Will you give me and Tony some time alone please?” “No. I mean, yeah sure.” LOL.

13. Also why don’t you and Tony go somewhere ELSE Michelle? Why do you have to kick Maxxie out?

14. Angie, he’s a STUDENT whose peers freak out over a girl with boobs, stop this.

15. “He can’t talk to you like that, I’m gonna get the fucking twat!” CHRIS. But also Angie, you’re able to draw hard boundaries with a peer but not with a STUDENT?

16. “I’ll give you head, THAT’S friendship.” Tony, you’re terrible.

17. “You’re the WORST MUSLIM EVER.” “I PRAY FIVE TIMES A DAY.” “FOR WHAT? MORE PORK CHOPS? OH FUCK IT, LET’S GET A DRINK. Can’t believe I was friends with such a FUCKING HYPOCRITE.” Oh, this hurts, it’s a well-done argument, though. Because you see what Anwar has to deal with regarding the profiling but you also see how Anwar’s homophobia is obviously harmful but he’s also selective in what religious rules he follows so of course Maxxie’s blow up is a valid one even though yelling “Happy fucking Ramadan” when Maxxie yells back, “IT’S NOT RAMADAN” also indicates an ignorant flippancy.

18. “So why are you with Tony?” “He’s exciting and he must love me because he can have anyone he wants.”

Every time he’s “exciting” YOU get hurt, Michelle and he sleeps around constantly and flaunts it IN YOUR FACE.

19. “He wants me the most, I mean, I’m his girlfriend, that has to count for something right?”

Jal:

20. “I don’t have sex with 17-year-old students.” “How old are they normally?” and when he realizes what he just said

21. And again, I do like that the dynamics get switched every episode, even though it’s usually Sid and Tony, you get to see Sid and Anwar, Maxxie and Tony, Jal and Cassie etc. I think the only person who doesn’t really shift much is Michelle.

22. This whole Anwar/Russian woman plot line is just ... OK. Even when it turns out to all be a scam it’s just ... a lot. It’s what makes me “eh” about the episode.

23. “What have we learned, Sidney? Your friends are shit.” Or Sid, you can just learn to say no. You didn’t HAVE to be a drug mule, you didn’t HAVE to help Anwar with this Russian woman, you don’t HAVE to be Tony’s friend.

24. “If you flaunt it they will come” Lol, Michelle is SO regular. but fine.

25. “Anwar lies to his mom all the fucking time, no no he makes ME lie to her.” “...Who is Anwar.” “Friend.” “Who is homo?” “ME!” the delivery tho.

26. The enduring legacy of Titanic. “Draw me like one of your French girls, Jack.”

27. “He’s pretty angry with me.” “Why?” “Because I told the truth.” No, Anwar, it’s because you’re being an asshole.

28. “He must’ve paid for her.” Jesus.

29. “Perhaps she wants a taste of the Kenneth.” This man is an Oscar-winning actor now.

30. “Why’s she kissing her dad??” Miles’ delivery.

31. “Tony, I think we found something you’re not actually good at.” So, Tony is just trash in bed it seems.

32. Sid: “Cassie, wow you made her look beautiful.” Maxxie: “She IS beautiful.” Sid, you piece of absolute shit. You deserve drugs up your ass.

33. “Tony, have you got anything to tell me?” “Uh, I don’t know, I like your hair? No? Your top’s nice? I love you? Any one of those?” Michelle, he’s TERRIBLE.

34.

it hurrrrrrrrrts.

[thequietmanno1]

TheLreads, Vigilantes ch 102, Replies Part 1

1) “This week was a bit too tiresome, getting back to work and I had to handle all on my own as my usual crew was out in other sites, so I didn’t had a chance to properly liveblog, and the free time I had I mostly read that goddamn 100 girlfriends manga. I don’t have regrets but that’s not the point here.”- This is also known as “the Manga Hole effect”. Once you enter the rabbit hole, you find all your free time is dedicated to it. And like a warren, there’s multiple different holes you can find that have a chance of sucking you in for days. 2) “Oh so there’s Midnight, she’s inside the hospital rather than in the front lines where we could be using her right now. She’s protecting Pop personally, and she better be, because here he comes…”- If we only have one actual pro hero on site, it’s best to have them right next to the priority target,, though how effective Midnight’s gas would be against Nomura is a toss-up. On the one hand, as his powers rely on oxygen intake during a rest period, filling a room with gas is a guaranteed counter, but if he’s fast enough to move through the fumes without taking a breath, then it’s useless. Basically, it comes down to others to force him back whilst she creates a disadvantageous environment for him. (Vigilantes ch 101) 3) “Eyyyy- look at that, McBee showed up to the party for real? What a surprise? And even more reasons for Midnight to be on the frontlines throwing her sleep gas around, but, sure, let us wait and see.”-Midnight’s exactly where she needs to be to best save Pop at a moment’s notice- inside a confined room where her sleeping gas is most effective- and also because Nomura’s speed means that just because he’s in front of the Hospital now, he won’t be in the next 5 seconds from their perspective.

4) “McBee why do you being dramatic and giving a sign to them with your hand? You can control them telepathically, can’t you? You really can’t help not being unnecessarily extra even when there’s no one watching, can you?”- I mean, he does have an audience of Tochi, Rapt and the miscellaneous police officers in the outside of the building, but even that’s just an excuse. Nomura here to put on a performance, and unlike his action hero script, this time he’s playing a horror movie monster on a rampage. 5) “McBee are you seriously leaving your goddamn army waiting outside rather than taking them with you? Honestly, sometimes I understand why you never won a single match so far.”- Not only would they slow him down inside the cramped, tight rooms of the hospital, but they also deter anybody else from entering lest they explode, as well as acting as sentries warning him out outside interference from the entrance. Not to mention, he also needs to move fast before more heroes from the outside come in to investigate the blackout and run the risk of ruining the operation. 6) “You say that like there’s even a problem. To McBee those are only disposable pawns, and besides, if they bring the hospital down on top of Pop then that takes care of their problem.”- True, but it’s not a guarantee that collapsing the building will kill her, and it’d bring more attention down on Nomura is there’s multiple casualties in a terrorist bombing as opposed to one. Not to mention this is first and foremost, a challenge to Nomura alone to see how he performs in this circumstance.

7) “Huh… Alright, now that I can understand, thank you for the explanation O'Clock Tulpa of emotional support. Still, it’s not like McBee even has that much brainpower normally anyway, we’ve seen it first hand.”- Nomura needed to spare as much of his limited RAM processing power as possible for this phase of the mission.

8) “how many fucking phases you even get my man”- As many as he thought sounded cool for the operation. Koichi’s interference is probably gonna turn this in something like  “Phase 5.3” as we go steadily off-script. 9) “Oh, look, it’s Phelps and the blue boy group, lovely, like they can even do something here besides slowly him down for half a second.”- Actually, that’s Soga and Koichi’s job, blunting the efficiency of his overclock speed so he can’t dodge well enough when Phelps goes for the kneecapping. 10) “Hopefully the rubber bullets manage to hit their target, ey Phelps?”- It’s an all-lead buffet this time. Even comes with an extra portion of machine-gun ammo.

11) “Soga. You can see by the spiked hair of bastardness, it is soga.

So, someone managed to find a sniper rifle among Knuckles’ toys it seems”- That, or if we wanna get even more hypocritical, Phelps loaned Soga a machine gun from the police. We’ve seen the super-powers at work in ordinary folks, I don’t doubt the police with weak Quirks make up for it with bigger firepower. 12) “How dare you offend the name of the greatest officer that ever existed, Puto? I’ll let you know that he’ll cut his salary in protest for this”- I do kinda wish he’d had our own Gumshoe, somebody who was willing to work with “the enemy” in order to achieve a greater good and wasn’t exactly the brightest around, making it easier for the vigilantes to gain aid from him even when under orders not to do so. 13) “No Soga goddammit you’re just delaying the inevitable just let us see McBee McDying already”- This is the closest we’re getting to Izuku’s split-second strategizing mid-fight, so we’ll have to make do with it. 14) ““loves to play dress-up”

lol. lmao even”- Soga calls em like he sees em.

15) “No you ain’t sorry, but keep going, I want to see what the genius plan is”- “Shoot him until he stops moving”. That’s it, that’s the plan. 16) “Snipe? with a sub-machine gun like that from such a distance? Yeah sure Phelps, it’s not like you have training with guns or something”- Doesn’t need to if all Soga’s aiming for it so be a noisy distraction. That said, the fact that he was able to aim the bullets roughly around the same corridor area from across the street indicates that Soga has had some experience with ballistics, presumably self-taught with Knuckle’s arsenal. 17) "Look phelps, I think that activating his quirk isn’t the best of ideas, considering that he can kill all of you waaaaay before he needs to stop to recharge

A shot at his head would at least make him waste some time regenerating, that would give you a better chance.”- All they need to do is get him to activate his speed perception from the initial barrage- then comes Koichi’s turn to lay on an additional burst of firepower when Nomura’s not expecting it and running out of time to keep his speed up. Furthermore, the bullets are all concentrated in the hallway between both parties, so Nomura would have to unnecessarily risk himself dodging the shots to close the distance when he can just arrogantly wait the suppression fire out – which is exactly what they were counting on him to do 18) “…

You guys are acting so stupidly while trying to play by the rules that I’m starting to root for McBee here.”- There is something to be said for Knuckle’s utter disregard of the rulebook when it came to getting hero work done. Although, from what I gather, if Soga thought he was a good enough shot to hit Nomura, he’d go for it, so it’s still just mainly Phelps who wants to avoid getting the civilian’s hands dirty.

19) “Yeah Soga I’m pretty sure you’re gonna hit someone doing that. Unless that was part of your plan all along… sneaky bastard”- We can plausibly say that anybody Soga hits here could be filed under ”it was an accident”, police or villain alike.

(Vigilantes ch 54)

20) “Afterwards we’ll need to sit down and talk a little bit about being laxer with people that act like Vigilantes, because I’d say that using personal connections with pro heroes would constitute a big no-no, since you had no way to know if he would be available or not. He could’ve been saving other people Phelps, would’ve you asked him to let them die so your sister would live? Is that it Phelps? Is that it? Interesting Phelps… very interesting…”-Well, I guess him somewhat accepting Soga’s aid in fighting off No:6 here is probably due to him realising he needs to loosen up his standards a little to see justice done this night, though it’s a little ironic that he ended up loosening his standards with Soga, of all people. 

(Vigilantes ch 95)

21) “Oh… you…

Yeah, I forgot you were also here. Still guarding the front door, totally not acting like vigilantes? 

Also, cooperating with the authorities? They are civilians Midnight, that intel he mentioned is all he can do, wouldn’t want them to, you know, act like vigilantes.”- Well, on the one hand, Soga just opened fire with a machine gun straight into a hospital, but on the other, he did so with Phelps’ blessing, so does that still count as Vigilante activity, or do we file it underneath “cooperating with the authorities”?

(Vigilantes ch 101) 22) “Hope those aren’t rubber bullets you’re shooting.

I still haven’t let go of that one.”- As we can see in slo-mo, this time Phelps very decisively didn’t come packing non-lethal rounds in defence of the hospital.

23) “Hopefully you know what you’re doing Phelps. Rhetorical question, I know you don’t know.”- Ok, but does Nomuraknow that Phelps doesn’t know what he’s doing? Perhaps it’s like to make like Nick, and bluff our way to victory. @thelreads

[uncaught-coolfish]

Ooh! *cracks knuckles*

Transphobic jokes in the early volumes (“Is she a man?”)

People without the skin tone of the blinding night moon were finally introduced in Volume 3 with one of the first being a jazz player basically named after 2 rocks.

The only non white main character is continuously the one being tortured, beaten and bloodied.

Except for I believe four, every villain in this show is either disabled, an in universe minority, a POC, and many times a combination of those three options.

The explicitly racist villains are treated as jokes. Meanwhile, the in universe organization of oppressed minorities are treated like very serious villainous terrorists.

One of their lesbian characters was based off a Nazi.

Their other lesbian character, who is also a Lakota girl, was redeemed by being told “Violent protest bad, don’t fight for your rights” by her much more privileged, whiter friend and crush. Again, they told “Violent Protest Bad” to the indigenous girl.

The black Desi-coded character was fridged the moment we met her and afterwards, her extremely successful methods of protest were disregarded in favor of the richer, more privileged and whiter minority’s methods.

The fucking “Minorities fighting for their rights turned terrorists” trope.

They whitewashed Sun for some reason (and… might be tripping, Ilia too…?).

Continually show how the humans are oh so innocent cute uwu while never showing the supposed oppression the in-universe minorities face.

They wrote the character with the Hebrew name to say a line akin to “We are the dominant species.” Pull the trigger piglet.

That same character is later revealed to have been branded over the eye during his childhood of slavery. The brand is used to make him look bad, though. And it is continually held in your face by the camera.

That same character in a commentary was also headcannoned to have started the fight which ended in his blindness and scarring, given to someone who really just… in the writer’s words… “LET HIM HAVE IT”

That same character also dies the same episode this is revealed, and we watch the whole death on screen. All of it. The child slave gets the longer and more gory death than the man responsible for his and many of his kind’s enslavement does.

Ableism. Oh my fucking god the ableism.

Why are all but one of the cops POC?

The White Get man Name family is given all of the Angel imagery. One of them kneels over the darkest skinned character in the show after punching him to the ground.

A beloved character who many headcannoned as disabled was brought back, and in an honestly inspiring turn of events was given a great power that proved, despite her “disability”, she was still a real girl. Next volume the very thing many coded as her disability was horrifically ripped away from her without much of her consent by her “friends” so she could ACTUALLY be a real girl. No more disability!

They then proceed to kill her off in a assisted suicide and give her powers to White Cop Princess.

That volumes “villain” is also attributed to having lost his humanity the moment he lost another arm. Ableism.

He is then given a black, SCARY looking prosthetic arm, in order to contrast one of our heroes brighter, FRIENDLIER one! Can you tell which one is the villain?

They also make that main character say her prosthetic is “just extra,” continually make the fact she lost her fucking arm something “romantic” because she lost it out of “love” (seriously fuck off!!!), and… continue to try and parallel her… with her current girlfriend’s former abuser? Ummmmm

The fucking weeeeird glorification of s***** Jesus Christ

And last but not least… making their single in-universe minority main girl more palatable by having her go “all lives matter!” to a crowd of oppressed people, so she can hide meekly behind her gf and then be told by an allusion of her past self what is essentially “you could be a white person, or just the color black.”

I wanna ask, what’s some problematic or discriminatory things you find in rwby? Because I want to make sure I’m not the only one who feels this about some stuff in rwby

[msmarvelwrites]

Make Your Mark On Me

Summary: 'if you stepped through that threshold, the comfort of friendship would be something not so easily retrieved again.'

Pairing: Sam Wilson x agent!reader

Warnings: friends-to-lovers, angst, Explicit sexual content, Oral (f receiving), fingering, vaginal penetration, size kink, Sam has shmeat.

Word Count: 2.8k

Authors Note: Words cannot describe what this man does to me. Sam Wilson, sir, thank you for your service. And thank you @sweeterthanthis for all her help and support✨🖤

The crystal chandelier bounced iridescent sparkles through the bustling ballroom, shimmers of glimmering light twirling around as if you were in a kaleidoscope. You scanned the area, careful to not make your presence known. You were meant to blend in -- to fade away into the background. It was a job you had done easily for years.

You were never meant to leave your desk. Infact, when you had agreed to take the job as the Avenger’s personal technical analyst in the first place, your only request was to never see any real action. You were more than happy to stay put, in the ears of your colleagues rather than actually holding the gun.

Your job was safe, predictable, routine.

That was until Sam Wilson came crashing into your life.

The mission, for anyone qualified, would have been easy. Dress up, play pretend, hack into a terrorist database…

Okay, that part you could do with your eyes blindfolded. Though, that wasn't the point.

“Don’t suppose you know who I’m supposed to be looking out for?” You spoke under your breath into the small comm snug in your ear. You stumbled for a moment, the heels Nat made you wear proving to be less than ‘easy-peasy’ as she so casually put it.

“Big guy in the corner.” Sam echoed in your ear. “And may I just say, you are looking gorgeous tonight.”

You rolled your eyes, as if he was standing right beside you and not somewhere blended into the crowded room.

“We’re working, Wilson. Besides, I know you're out there charming the pants off of some model.” You retorted, the remark intended to make him laugh but he only scoffed, as if the idea wounded him.

“Babygirl, you think so little of me. I’d much rather take your pants off.” Sam’s words were smooth, well rehearsed and at this point, expected.

It’s the way it had always been between you two. Of course, you’d never let anything come of the innocent banter, except the occasional burning cheeks and lingering touches. Sam was your best friend, and that was how it was always going to be.

Besides, Sam Wilson could, and had on many nights, pulled any woman he set his sights on. You weren't about to be added to the ever growing list of women that hobbled out of his bedroom at three in the morning.

“Well, jokes on you. I’m not wearing any.” You mentally facepalmed yourself for the awful retort, a smile pulled across your lips at the melodic sound of your friends' laugh.

“Grab a drink, gorgeous. Loosen up for me.” He cooed, his tone playful as you swiped a champagne flute off a passing waiter. “The office you want to get to is upstairs. Last door on your left. You can meet me around back when you’ve secured the file.”

You nodded your head, bringing the glass to your lips and letting the liquid quell your nerves. You could do this.

Easy in and out.

Carefully you made your way through the crowded room, hyper aware of your surroundings as you quietly slipped through the masses. You smiled politely at a group of men who let you through, though it didn't go unnoticed how one of the strangers lingered their hands on your hips a little too long as you slid by.

“Don’t be nervous. I got you.” Sam’s words caught you off guard, the earnest in them causing you to fumble with your retort.

“You watching me, Wilson?” You mumbled, making your way up the stairs and towards your mission. It was almost over.

“Told you before we left, I’m not letting you out of my sights.” Sam chuckled softly, adding, “I got eyes everywhere baby. Your ass in that dress, by the way-”

“Watch it Sam.” You warned, but you couldn't help the smile that formed on your mouth, his words warming your cheeks. Because with Sam it never felt like objectification. With Sam there was always so much kindness behind his words, you almost took it for honesty.

Which, of course, it couldn't be.

“Okay, I’m at the door. How do I-”

“Is the little lady lost?” A deep gruff voice startled you as you spun on your heel only to come face to face with the same handsy stranger.

You cleared your throat, shaking your head quickly and trying to steady your voice. “N-no, sir. Just looking for the washroom.” You answered a little too quickly. There was radio silence on Sam’s end, and that made you a little nervous.

“Sir? I like the sound of that. Why don’t I escort you, and you can come up with a way to replay my kindness when we get there?” He toyed with the idea, his words crass as he gripped your forearm.

“Uh- no thank you. I can find my own way.” You stuttered, suddenly aware of how alone you truly were in this dark hallway with him.

“It wasn't a question.” He snarled, pulling you against him but before your body could even collide with his, he was on the floor.

You opened your eyes, a very worried Sam standing where the stranger once was. His eyes scanned you for a moment before he realized how startled you truly were.

“Did he touch you?” He spoke, and though he meant well, his tone came out dark. It was a side of Sam you very seldom saw, and now, watching his jaw click back and forth into place, you couldn't help but shiver. The stranger was lucky he only knocked him out.

“Only here,” You rubbed your arm where he had grabbed you and instantly Sam pulled you against his body, his hands running small circles in your back. “I’m fine, Sam. Really.”

Sam chuckled softly, pulling himself out of his rage and back to you. “Course’ you are. That’s my girl. Now let’s finish this thing and get you home.”

After you hacked into the computer database and retrieved the file your team needed, you and Sam slipped into the small black car. The ride home was one filled with silence and though it was usually comfortable with your friend, this time was anything but.

“He really didn't hurt me.” You finally spoke, trying and failing to reassure the nervous man.

“I know, but-” He began, but you squeezed his hand, the touch shutting him up instantly. If only it was always that easy. You chuckled softly at the thought.

“Baby, you had my back. Just like you said you would.” You bolstered, your eyes fleeting from his only for a moment as they landed on his lips. You mentally shook your head, averting your gaze to his lap, which wasn't really much better.

This strange warmth that began pooling in your stomach coaxed you into an unease you couldn't shake until you got back to the compound. Sam walked you to your room, resting on the door frame as you shuffled in, your eyes trained on the floor.

There was something different brewing between Sam and you tonight.

Something you had buried deep down and seldom let out. Maybe for fear of rejection, but deep down you knew he would always let you down easy. So perhaps it was the notion that, if you stepped through that threshold, the comfort of friendship would be something not so easily retrieved again.

“Why haven't you just kissed me?” The words tumbled from your lips before you could stop them. They seemed to slap Sam across the face, halting him in his place.

“Excuse me?” He managed to speak, words caught in his throat.

“I- I just mean… You look at me the same way you look at them. Hell, I’ve seen you pull the same lines on me you use on them. So why haven't you-”

“You want that?” He questioned. Now facing him, you could see a glimmer in his eyes you could only place as mischievous.

You worried on your bottom lip taking in Sam’s muscular form. It wasn't as if you hadn't noticed how incredibly beautiful he was before, but someone you had downed your attraction under a list of excuses. But now, in the dim lighting of your bedroom with the years of built up tension sizzling around you, you couldn't think of a single one.

“I just think I’d like to know what it’s like. At least for the night.” You spoke in sincerity, padding across the room towards him. You could tell he was bewildered by your sudden confidence, and to be fair, so were you. You could blame it on the champagne or maybe the bodycon dress Nat had squeezed you into, but you knew it was just Sam.

“Baby girl, if you cross this line, there’s no going back.” He warned, a false seriousness in his words. But there was honestly there, and you knew it, too. There would be no back peddling, but there was something in the way your hands were shaking; body vibrating with the notion of Sam close to you that had you wondering if you even cared.

“Show me.” You couldn't help the smirk that pulled at your lips when Sam sucked in a breath, his eyes never leaving yours.

You expected him to buckle. Turn away and walk out of the room, desperate to hold onto whatever reminisce of a friendship you still had. But he surprised you as he closed the distance, one hand sliding onto your waist and pulling you flush against his chest and the other cupping your jaw.

His thump traced your bottom lip, coaxing a soft gasp to spill from your throat.

Sam smiled softly at your reaction, his tongue flicking out to dampen his lips and -

You could have passed out right there. All the air in your lungs dissipated the moment his soft lips touched yours. Your hands instinctively wrapped around his neck, pulling him in, craving more, urging him on.

You could feel his smile in the kiss as you moaned, completely lost in the way his hands roamed your form. He was intoxicating, the heat of his body mixed with the warm smell of vanilla and nicotine incinerating any worry that had been floating in your head. You could only feel him - and the mattress as you fell backwards onto the bed.

Sam’s fingers found the bottom of your dress, dipping underneath the fabric as he pulled it up around your ass. His lips left yours, only to connect with the column of your throat, teeth gracing your jaw as you breathed him in.

The tension in the room changed suddenly when he caged you down onto the bed, his forehead resting on yours as you caught your breath.

“If you want me to stop-”

“Stay, please.” You gasped out, his eyes meeting yours and seeing the same desperation mirroring back.

“Fuck.” Sam growled out, eye rolling back in his head as you watched any hesitation melt away.

You were on your back moments later, his lips on your thighs and he held your knees apart. His mouth on your clothed cunt, tongue lapping against the wet fabric as he stretched it and with a snap, he tore it away. You gasped arching your back as if to soften the blow as he caught your clit in his mouth.

“Stay put, gorgeous.” He hummed against your sloppy folds, his nose rubbing against your clit as he devoured you; tongue puncturing your dripping hole as he drank you in.

You slapped your hand over your mouth, not at all eager to be added to the list of screamers Sam had come home with, but it was easier said than done. And by the way he was eating you out, it was only a matter of time before you were a whimpering mess.

“Don’t hold back those beautiful sounds.” Sam encouraged, a finger curling inside you, pulling at your walls as you choked on a moan, eyes rolling back in your head when he found your throbbing clit again. With only a few more twirls of his tongue, you were pouring out onto him, your first orgasm ripping through your body as he ate up every last drop.

“Fuck. You taste so sweet, babygirl.” Sam gasped, wiping your come from his lips as he flipped you over, instructing you to get on your knees and hold the headboard. “Gunna’ fuck this pussy so good. Gunna’ ruin you, gorgeous. Want you remembering that you asked for this.”

You could only whine in response, most of your will fucked away by his skilled tongue. But you had no idea what was to come. Sam lined himself up with you then, stroking his warm head in your slick folds as he began so rip you open with his cock.

You were no one near a virgin, but you probably could have fooled Sam as he coaxed himself further into you. On instinct, you arched your back away from him, terrified of his size as he began to slide deeper and deeper -

Sam grabbed you by your waist, holding you still as the tip of his thick cock kissed the deepest parts of you. “Nuh-uh, you're gonna’ take every last inch, baby girl. I know you can. Be my good little thing.”

You bit back a scream, letting go as you sunk back down onto his cock. You knew for a fact that you wouldn't be sitting comfortably tomorrow. Or for the next few days…

Before you could beg, Sam bucked his hips against you, pulling a gargled sob to vibrate from your chest as he fucked into you. There wasn’t any possible way he could get any deeper, but as he dug his fingers into your hips and speared you against his base, you swear he discovered a new part of you.

With one hand holding you steady and the other tangled in your hair, Sam made you his. You throbbed, pussy fluttering around his cock as he kept his brutal pace.

“That’s my good girl. Fuck.” Sam couldn't contain himself, a smile forming in his lips because he finally had you. Not only that, but he was balls deep, spanking your ass and coaxing screams from your beautiful lips. “Taking this cock so good.”

You didn't have the ability to answer him, gripping the headboard for dear life as you began to come undone for the second time tonight. And he knew, too; the cocky bastard.

“Thatt’a girl. Hold onto that for me. I know you’re close, but hold on .” Sam grunted against you, his large hands gripping your ass and watching your puckered hole glisen with your come. If he had it his way, he’d make another meal out of you, but he knew you were only moments from soaking his cock.

“I cant- oh- Sam!.” You screamed, your body betraying his demand. “Yes, yes…” You chanted the word, on the brink of complete destruction as your orgasm began to-

With a whine, he pulled out of you, flipping you onto your back and folding you in half. You gripped your knees, and gasped and he sank back down into you. With a few deep pumps you were right back where you were, whimpering and pleading with him to make you come.

“Just wanted to see your pretty face when you come apart.” Sam admitted, a crooked smile forming on his mocha lips and your swear, it was the sweetness of it that had you tumbling over the edge. He was just so beautiful, you couldn't hold back.

And just like that, the golden God between your legs turned you into a screamer. His name left your lips so many times, you swear it became your new religion. A prayer you only spoke for him.

“Where do you want it?” He suddenly sounded vulnerable, but then again, so were you. Cockdrunk and flushed from his assault. You lost yourself in his question until you noticed how hard he was gripping your thighs, holding back his orgasm as he shook, slowing his thrusts.

“Fill me up, Sam.” you pleaded, and just like that, he crumbled. A broken growl left his lips, one hand coming to wrap around your throat and hold you steady as you consciously make the effort to speaze your used cunt around him.

“Fuck, yeah. Just like that” A few sloppy thrusts later and he was painting your throbbing walls with his hot spend. The both of you shivered, panting against one another as you took in the mess you’d made. You had shattered everything platonic in a matter of minutes, and yet the goofy grin plastered on Sam’s lips was unyielding.

“You’re my best friend.” He grinned, still catching his breath. He stroked your face, tucking your damp hair behind your ear as he kissed your lips tenderly.

“I don’t want you like a best friend.” you puffed, framing his jaw in your hands as you took him in.

In this new light, Sam looked ethereal.

Like something otherworldly and for a moment, you knew that even if everything would change the moment you left the confines of your bedroom, Sam would always be yours. And that would always be enough.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

Lila Rossi: I’d Say She’s a Good Villain, but Then I’d Be Lying (300 Follower Special)

Deception and cunning are easily two of the most important traits an antagonist could have. It shows that even if they don't have the strength to overcome obstacles, their wit is more than enough. This kind of trait is why characters like Lex Luthor, David Xanatos, and Princess Azula are so beloved, simply because of how intelligent they can be as villains and pose a real threat to the heroes.

It's clear that the Miraculous Ladybug writers want Lila to be seen as this, but the writing seriously fails to back that claim up.

Easily one of the most controversial characters in Miraculous Ladybug is Lila, mainly for the writing surrounding her. But there was a time where she was actually more of an ambiguous character, mainly for the lack of screentime she had until Season 3. But unfortunately, the more appearances she's had have painted a very poor portrait of an antagonist.

Lila's Tragic and Sympathetic Motivation for Hating Ladybug

Lila's first appearance was at the tail end of Season 1, “Volpina”. She was a new transfer student from Italy, and quickly made friends with a lot of her classmates for the lies she told, including being friends with Ladybug (which Alya blindly believed without doing any research like any excellent journalist). But because of how close she was getting to Adrien, Marinette, in a rare act of selfishness, transforms into Ladybug just to chew out Lila for lying about knowing her, humiliating her in front of Adrien. And this is the only motivation we get for what Lila does afterwards.

I'm not saying that it's wrong for Lila to get upset at Ladybug for doing this, and I like the moment of weakness Marinette has, but this is literally the only explanation we get for Lila deciding to side with Hawkmoth, a literal terrorist. As much as I hated the way the arc turned out, I could still understand Chloe siding with Hawkmoth, as it was clear that Hawkmoth was manipulating her and taking advantage of her ego. Lila? Ladybug's mean to her one time, and that inspires her to conspire with a complete stranger who brainwashes people to attack the city, which endangers innocent people and causes God knows how much in collateral damage if not for Miraculous Ladybug fixing everything.

I just don't get how a single negative interaction with someone is enough to conspire with a literal supervillain. Even in Season 3, when Marinette and Lila truly became enemies, it was because she risked exposing all the lies she told, which could damage her reputation. Sure, it's petty, but it makes sense for Lila to want to keep up the illusion. If she was simply an antagonist to Marinette in her civilian life like Chloe was before “Miracle Queen” , I'd be fine with that, but the writers clearly want her to be seen as on the same level of evil as Hawkmoth. I'll get into why that doesn't work later on.

Why Lila is an Excellent Liar

In my Master Fu analysis, I had pointed out that despite all the flaws he had, the narrative insisted on portraying him as an incredibly wise mentor. The same problem applies for Lila as well. We're supposed to see Lila as an expert manipulator and liar, but her lies are insultingly obvious. She always claims to be friends with celebrities and does all these awesome things, and in an age where we can have almost any question answered thanks to the internet, nobody ever stops to question her.

It's even more frustrating when you hear Lila talk about saving Jagged Stone's cat, when Jagged Stone is established to be very fond of Marinette (evidentially more than his own daughter), and nobody ever points that out. I think if Lila's lies were more stories about her travels around the world than outright lies about real people, it could have worked. It'd still be hard to believe, but it's something.

But this is a problem with writing shows aimed at children. As much as we hate writers who need to spell out things to kids, sometimes, they just don't understand some of the media they consume. Seriously, I never got this joke in SpongeBob as a kid, and I can't believe Nickelodeon actually approved this.

So the dilemma when writing a show with children in mind is finding that sweet spot between assuming your audience can figure it out, but not being too vague in your details. It's even harder when you need to find a way to convey the fact that someone is lying without being too obvious. Unfortunately, the show clearly fails to do that

Okay, this is going to sound like an incredibly weird thing to cite, and I only know about it because I used to know someone who was a huge fan of the franchise, but the movie Monster High: Friday Night Frights does a better job of subtly explaining to the audience that a character is lying. Please, just hear me out.

The movie follows the main characters competing in their high school's roller derby for the season after everyone on the usual team gets injured, and the championship match is against another school whose team tends to cheat to win matches. How they manage to do this without getting caught is anyone's guess. While the main characters are practicing, their coach, Clawd, notices a spy for the enemy team taking video of them to study their moves. In response, he calls over one of the athletes, Operetta, to chew her out for her showboating attitude. In reality, he's alerting her to the spy. Only using facial expressions, he clues her, and by extension, the audience, in on the fact that they know what the opposing team is trying to do.

This soon leads to Operetta pretending to tell the enemy team about their secret plan for the championship match, which was really an attempt to outsmart them to gain the advantage in the final stretch. The brilliance of this is how the audience is informed of this with no dialogue, and there's no scene afterwards spelling it out for those who don't get it. It manages to convey deception without being too obvious that Clawd and Operetta are being deceitful.

I think if there were more subtle hints to show the audience Lila was lying, she would be seen in a better light. As it is, Lila's lies are just pathetic, and it's ridiculous that everyone believes her. Which leads me to...

Lila, the Master Manipulator

I once read a Star Trek: Voyager fanfic that poked fun at the series by claiming that the reason a lot of the dumber episodes like “Threshold” and “Twisted” happened was because one of the crew members was an alien who unintentionally produced mood altering pheromones, with Captain Janeway actually realizing they were all high because of said pheromones, while two of the unaffected crew members were wondering what the hell they were doing before they found out the cause. Why do I bring this up? Sometimes, it feels like Lila is an unintentional parallel to the alien in that story.

Like so many characters, it's clear the show desperately wants the audience to view Lila in a certain way, but her actions do very little to actually back up that claim. When she's not using lies to tell stories about so many famous people she knows like her uncle who works for Nintendo, Lila is using strategies to manipulate everyone that are so obviously deceptive, the Thermians could pick up on them. Everyone and their mother knows how ridiculous a lot of what Lila does in episodes like “Chameleon” and “Ladybug” are, and I've talked about them before, so I'll try to be quick.

First off, as someone who had access to accommodations through high school and has had assistance in college so far, there is no way in hell that Ms. Bustier should take Lila's tinnitus at face value in “Chameleon”. If a student has a disability that could interfere with the education process, physical or developmental, not only does the school have to evaluate their performance, and determine if they're eligible for an Individualized Education Program, or IEP, but her teachers would have to be notified in the first place. As her primary educator, Ms. Bustier would be part of the team to oversee Lila's IEP and determine what accommodations she needs to help her learn better with her tinnitus and arthritis. But because the writers don't know what Google is, they just ignore it,  assume that Lila can just say she has a disability, and have everyone believe it. Even when Eric Cartman pretended to be disabled to compete in the Special Olympics, he put in more effort to look the part, even if he looked like a caricature.

Then there's the fact that that in “Chameleon”, everyone just believes Lila when she says Marinette stole her grandmother's necklace when not only is said necklace from the Agreste line of jewelry, but Alya, who is Rena Rouge, can't pick up on the fact that it's a fake. All she does to justify these lies is come up with a sob story about how nobody believes her, yet nobody ever tries to defend Marinette except Alya one time, and it was after she got expelled.

Or what about in “Oni-Chan”, where Lila thinks having Kagami kill Ladybug while claiming she'll back away from Adrien is a good idea? Let's say Oni-Chan does kill Ladybug or at least take away her Miraculous, what then? We know Lila wouldn't go through with this promise, and as soon as Kagami sees her harassing Adrien, she'll be ripe for akumatization again. Overall, not a great plan.

And yet somehow, this last example is what made her worthy enough to become one of Hawkmoth's most trusted agents. I'm just going to say it: Lila is not a good fit for the power of illusion. Whenever she's Volpina or Chameleon, she always goes out of her way to make a big show instead of being subtle with her deceptions. “Chameleon” is the worst offender, as even though Lila gets the power to shapeshift into someone else, instead of being discreet and cornering people into kissing them and gaining their appearance, she just runs around to get Ladybug's attention instead of being subtle. Even Felix had the bright idea to pretend to be Adrien to catch Ladybug off guard. How do you lose to something that happened in “Felix”?

Despite all of these screw-ups, we're still supposed to see her as this master of deception worthy of allying with Hawkmoth in both his supervillain and civilian form, when really, she's a terrible liar on the schoolyard and on the battlefield.

Why Lila is an Important Character

In the grand scheme of things, Lila just isn't as important of a character that the show loves to parade her around as. She's nothing more than a plot device used to raise the stakes in an episode, given how much reality seems to bend over just to accommodate for her lies. Even when the show alludes to her being part of bigger things, like her deal with Adrien, or her rivalry with Marinette, they don't even go anywhere.

She just feels pointless when you remember Astruc's brilliant idea to force Chloe into being the final Akuma for the season while Lila isn't even mentioned once. She only really makes appearances whenever the writers feel like it, which is why it’s hard to take her seriously. Why should I take this character seriously as a threat if the writers refuse to take her seriously as a threat? Why build Lila up as a big threat and not give her a major role in the finale? Why even include her in the show in the first place when you could show Chloe being more manipulative to fill in the plots Lila plays a big part in?

As of the time I am writing this analysis, four episodes of Season 4 have aired, three of them have been about lies or deception, and Lila hasn't been mentioned at all. It honestly seems like she won't appear unless the writers need a easy way to drive up the conflict, so they can justify it by saying that Lila's “superpower” of lying is more powerful than the common sense of everyone else.

I'm sorry this post was shorter than the last one, but compared to Master Fu, there's not that much to say about Lila that I haven't already said. Even the show barely gives her any attention, so it's hard for me to really find a lot to talk about.

[certifiedskywalker]

Fett’s Foundling - Din Djarin

thewhitedannimal said: Hi! Could I request a mando x reader where the reader is also a skilled and famous mandalorian? They decide to work together and after sometime, the reader is impressed by mando and starts developing a noticeable crush on him, but mando thinks it’s cute and expresses his feelings? Tysm if u do, I love ur work!

AN: I kinda changed this up a bit. I hope you like it though! I think it turned out pretty well!

WARNING: SEASON 2 SPOILERS!!! and mentions of terrorism (Star Wars terrorism but still)

“You’re sure about this?”

Boba’s dark eyes were cold and searching as he held your gaze. The lines of his face, including those carved into his skin by the Snarlacc’s digestive acid, were creased as he tried to read you. You imagined you looked about the same as him, but less scarred. Brow furrowed, lips thin, and expression stern. You were, after all, Fett’s foundling. 

“Are you sure about this? After all, we’ve been through a lot together. You might find that you miss me, go all soft on me, old man.”

At your teasing, the coldness in Boba’s tense features melted away. His mouth quirked upwards in one of his rare, closed-lipped smiles. The smile was a welcomed change of pace; the only hint of joy to be found on Moff Gideon’s freshly captured, Imperial light cruiser. Out of the corner of your eye you caught Bo-Katan looking grim, head ducked down in conservation with her subordinate. She had been whispering since the Jedi left, eyes darting around the bridge in search of the Darksaber. 

You glanced around too, but found that the ancient relic was nowhere to be found. Neither was Din Djarin. 

“And you say I’m going soft,” Boba scoffed, pulling your attention back to him. “You’re tied to him like a Kowakian monkey-lizard to a Hutt. Pathetic joke of a creature.”

“You would be the only one to think that,” you countered, “and the first to know that you’re wrong.” It wasn’t a threat. It was the truth. 

Boba had found you as a child who, much like himself, was stranded on Tatooine, doomed to the wastes baked by the twin suns. Both of you had been lost, outsiders to an outside world. Then Boba found his way back to the way of the Mandalore and brought you with him. He taught you to be a warrior and the two of you took odd jobs for odd people.

All the while, Boba searched for his armor and, with his help and scraps of lost battle gear, you had begun to forge your own. Eventually, you forged a name for yourself. So, it surprised him when you had, many cycles past, asked Boba if you could use his: Fett. It had stuck and you had stuck together, through it all. Though now…

“Not pathetic,” Boba finally conceded, “but you’re tied to him. Any being can see it.”

Warmth spread through your body and over your skin like a blaster bolt singe. Tightness gathered in your jaw, forced your teeth together like a vice. To ebb the sting promised by further embarrassment, you tore your eyes from Boba’s, unwilling to let him see deeper in your heart and mind. He knew you too well and you knew him too well. The two of you knew what the other was after and how those paths no longer lined up together.

“You don’t have to ask for my permission to leave.” At his words, you lifted your gaze back to Boba’s. “All I ask is that you give your allegiance to no one-” 

You roll your eyes at his words. “I know my value, my ideals. I’d never compromise either.”

Boba shook his head and leaned closer to you. Between you, he extended his hand. Your eyes glanced from his empty, open hand to his face a few times before he finally spoke up. 

“-unless they prove to you that your life is more important than their own.”

“I don’t…”

Shock. You remembered the feeling from your first gunfight. All those cycles ago, when you were lost on Tatooine. It had been so long since something had truly rattled you. For it to be Boba’s words, the man who taught you to push shock and fear off to the wayside, you were left all the more shaken.

“From what I’ve seen, that Mandalorian is as honorable as an ex-bounty hunter can be.” 

Boba gives you another closed-lipped smile. In your silence, you glance down at his hand again. You see him move it towards you, like an offering. Without another moment's hesitation, you move to rest your hand on his armored forearm. You feel his fingers on your own arm give a gentle squeeze before you meet his eyes again.

“You take care of yourself.”

Before you can return the sentiment, Boba pulls you in from your arm and into a tight embrace. Shock, again, freezes you, turns your limbs to carbonite for longer than you care to acknowledge. Boba’s embrace melts you free from it. You wrap your arms over his shoulders and hold to him as you did during that first gunfight. 

“You too,” you whisper, your voice small enough to packed into a pulse rifle. You pull away before you let yourself melt away with the shock. “And tell me when you take Tatooine.”

“Of course,” Boba nods his head at you and glanced to his left. You follow his eyeline and see Fennec. Her lips quirk upwards when you meet her gaze.

“Watch the little duchess. She wants that laser sword.”

“I will.”

Fennec nods before she turns her attention to Boba. As if he never took it off, Boba’s helmet is already on. The dark visor focuses on you for one last moment before he starts off towards the bridge exit, Fennec on his heels. You watch the pair go for a moment, mentally tracking their path to the hangar where the Slave I rests in wait. At the thought of the old beast, your chest aches. The discomfort lingers only slightly as you turn your back on the only life you had known and to the darkness of space shown through the viewport.

“Fett, what a legacy.” 

Your body tenses at the sound of Gideon’s low voice. When you turn your eyes over to where he is bound, you see dark eyes locked on you like a TIE target. 

“To throw that all away for a dangerous sect of disenfranchised Mandalorians.”

“I am Mandalorian,” you said, starting towards him. Each step you take is with purpose, calculated to reach the total sum of Gideon’s fear. You see how his eyes widen slightly and feel a rush of satisfaction further dulls the ache of Boba leaving; of you staying. “And, the last time I watched the holonews, it seemed that the New Republic labeled your broken Empire as a terrorist sect, disenfranchised from power rather than freedom.”

Gideon shifted, his cape collecting more dust and wrinkles as it rested on the floor with him. He opened his mouth to speak but you quickly turned to Cara. She was smiling, watching Gideon flounder. When she raised her eyes to yours, she grinned.

“That may be the most I’ve ever heard a Mandalorian talk in one go. Mando is always so...quiet.”

“Speaking of,” you glanced back at Bo-Katan and saw her eyes on you. In the hopes she wouldn’t hear, you leaned closer to Cara. “Where is he?”

“He walked off the bridge when the Jedi left with the kid. He went down the hall and to the left.” You nodded at her in thanks and glanced down at a scowling Gideon.

“I think the bindings should be tighter,” you said before walking off in the same direction as Din. With every entrance of new hallway you walked past, you peered into each, searching for him. He had been rocked, set a kilter by the Jedi that had stormed in for a rescue. 

He had lost the only family he had known, just as you had decided to let yours go. You could feel your own loneliness creeping up your spine and could only imagine that he felt the same doom sneaking after him. Despite being a hunter, you knew that you could not save him from that feeling, just as you could not entirely save yourself. Though, maybe, you could keep each other’s company and scare off the dark together.

The thought made you cringe. Boba was right: you were tied to Din. Pathetically stuck to him, nearly a stranger; but a stranger with skill. On Tython, you had seen him fight off a few Stormtroopers before running after the Child. He had bested a Darktrooper too, from what Cara had gotten Gideon to admit. He was a stranger with heart too.

A stranger willing to break his Creed, the oath he asked if you and Boba had taken, to say a true goodbye to the Child. In the moment, you didn’t catch a good look at his features. You saw only his head of dark brown hair and the curved tanned skin of his cheek. His looks don't matter to you though. You were already taken by him, from the moment he stood up to Boba on Tython, was ready to lie his life down for his Child. 

You were so lost in the memory that you nearly overlooked the shine of his beskar in an abandoned meeting room. Silver casted in his armor, Din was starkly outlined against the blackness of space that shown outside the viewpoint. His helmet was still off, held tight in his left hand. The sight felt sacred, as if it were wrong for you to be looking at even the back of his exposed head.

“You can come in.” While he was only a few paces away from you, Din’s voice sounded far off. Slowly, you took a step inside before taking pause.

“Do you want me to walk in backwards?” Despite the seriousness in your tone, you hear a small, breathy chuckle from Din’s direction. “I’m just trying to be cautious.”

“It’s appreciated,” Din said and, much to your surprised, you watched as he turned his head. In the dark of the Imperial meeting room, it was hard to make out his features but you could feel him looking at you. “But not necessary. Not anymore, not right now.”

Defeat was plain and heavy in his voice. You were familiar with the weight of it, having heard it in your own after your first, and only, failed bounty. Slowly still, you started towards Din again. As you moved, you catch Din’s head turn back to face the stars. Closer now, you sneak a glimpse at the side of his face before settling at his side.

He was handsome, a word you thought you would never use before. Granted, on Tatooine, there weren’t many beings you felt adequately captured the essence of the word. Din, however, with his strong, curved nose and scruff-covered jaw fit the bounty. Not to mention the dark of his eyes that looked like empty space itself. Full of mystery, Din’s eyes were, and you were ready to dive right in. 

Then Boba’s words echoed in your head. Any being can see it. At Din’s side, you forced your body still. Movement, nervousness that only Din could spark in you, could make your feelings all the more obvious. Now was not the time for that.

“You miss him already.”

“Yeah.” You snuck a glance at Din. His eyes were fixed on the view port, distant, like his voice. It was like he was trying to chase after the Child but was lost in space. You had no idea what to say to ease his search, his pain. Luckily, you didn’t have to.

A fast whoosh sounded out from the hangar below and distracted both you and Din from others presence. Roaring of a familiar engine reached your ears and, as quickly at you recognized it, the Slave I shot out of the light cruiser hold. Silently, like a swift and stalking hunter, the ship you were raised on rushed away. You watched it go until your lost the shape of it, saw it meld with the stars. It was then you felt the hairs on the back of your neck rise.

You looked over at Din and found that he was facing you now. Features once hidden under layers of beskar were now on full display. Din looked older than you imagined. There were strands of grey in his hair and patches in his scruff. Crows feet crinkles were gathered in the corners of his eyes; though it couldn’t be because he smiled so often, not with a life like his. Not with a life like yours, like all other Mandalorians. 

“You didn’t go?” Concern, in his voice and in his brown eyes, warmed your chest. You could only nod in response. “Fett, what are you doing?”

“Making my own way, like all Foundlings must.” Unable to hold yourself back, you nudge softly Din with your elbow. “Like you are. What you did was brave, even if it broke your rules.”

“You inspired me,” Din said, his voice nestled closer now around you. You held his gaze with a quirked brow, entreating him to continue. “Remember what you said on Morak before Mayfield and I went in?”

“‘Don’t get killed’ wasn’t it?” 

For the first time, you see Din smile. It’s not like Boba’s smile, the only other Mandalorian you had known. Din’s smile showed his teeth, even if it wasn’t for more than a second. Lines in his face grew more pronounced around his lips. You forced yourself to look away from his mouth and back out of the view port.

“No, I don’t remember.”

“You were talking to Boba. He said I wouldn’t break the Creed, even for the kid, if I had to. You said that I would, that my heart was in the fight.”

Want edged Din’s voice, powerful enough to get you to look up at him once more. His dark eyes were on you still and you don’t think they ever left. They dropped from your eyes to your lips and back again. As small as the shifting glance was, it was enough to tickle your stomach. You had to force yourself to stay still and quiet.

“You were right.”

“I am, most of the time, you’ll find,” you say breathlessly. It’s all you can manage.  

“Is that why you’re sticking around?”

“What?” You lick your lips nervously and curse yourself for it. 

“Because your heart is in this fight,” Din extends his hand as he speaks. In his open, gloved palm, the hilt of the Darksaber rested. You hadn’t truly even entertained the weapon, what it meant and stood for. Instead, your mind was clouded with Din, with want.

“In a sense.” 

Din raised his brows at you. “That’s a Guild answer. A hunter answer. Give me yours.”

You already know it, you want to say but you held your tongue back. Silence, tense and unyielding, fell over the two of you. Din held your gaze, not backing down on his request. It had taken him a few minutes, but he had found his confidence without the helmet. You smiled at the thought; he was a true Mandalorian. A sense of ease overwhelmed you, made you too comfortable and your tongue too loose.

“My heart is in the hands of the fighter.” 

You reached your hand over and pushed Din’s fingers closed over the hilt of the Darksaber. For a moment, you fingers lingered over his. You savored the warmth before pulling away. Finding enough courage, you held Din’s gaze again and felt your fear dissipate.

“But I think he knows that already.”

Din swallowed hard before replying, “he does.”

Burnt by embarrassment, you took a step back from him. Just as you were about to take another, dismiss yourself from the conversation and your ultimate rejection, there was a clang. You watched as Din’s helmet hit the floor and as he reached his newly free hand out. His gloved fingers wrapped around your wrist and pulled you back. You took not of his eyes again, how they flicked between yours and your lips. Was he nervous too?

“And he feels the same.”

“You-”

“I feel the same,” Din clarified, eyes focused solely on your face. 

Then, it was just the two of you again. Two Foundlings once lost then found again by the other. Wed to the fight but tied to each other. This was the way, wasn’t it? You felt sure it was.

When Din bent down and captured your lips with his, you felt all the more strongly about it. Whatever way, whatever path Din followed, you would be close behind. You were two bounty hunters, fallen from grace and into a world unprepared for what would follow.

[thebestpersonherelovesbucky]

Falcon and the Winter Soldier Ep. 6 Takeaway

First let me say that I really truly enjoyed this show. I was so nervous at the beginning and I was so nervous for the end, and though there are things that I didn’t like (as to be expected with pretty much any media) my overall excitement was rewarded. I definitely give the show an A and can only hope that we keep getting things like this and WandaVision with their next shows.

Anyway.

Sam and Bucky (and Sharon) coordinating from their different spots. I always like seeing the tactical side of working together in addition to the badass fighting together stuff. 

The officer not questioning Bucky’s presence and calling him Sargent Barnes made me SO happy.

The facial mask thing-y that Natasha had in Cap 2 making a reappearance. Idk why I like that but it’s nice to know that these things are still being utilized.

CAPTAIN AMERICA’S FIRST ENTRANCE!!!! my GOD did Sam ROCK that!!! Fucking AH-MAY-ZING. 

Sam’s new costume is perfect like the comics!! It’s so often changed that it’s so great to see it on screen! 

“I’m sorry, wait. Who are you?” “I’m Captain America.” The parallel between this is Steve’s “Um...Captain America.” in the First Avenger. 

The subtitles saying “Captain America” now whenever Sam in uniform talks.

Bucky trying to talk Karli down, approaching from a different angle than Sam because it’s what he knows and honestly does want to stop her without it coming to a fight. Especially when he realizes it’s a trap and is all “oh fuck me” and needs to haul ass lol. That is Bucky Barnes to a T. 

“Seriously, Bucky, you had one job.” Omg, Sharon. lmao

Sam’s fight with Batroc was so cool. No serum. Just straight up ass kicking plus the au revoir at the end. Yes please and thank you.

Redwing!!!! Yaaaay!!!! (”a little birdie told me” lmao, Sam.)

Seeing the Vibranium wings in ACTION. Bouncing a freaking helicopter off them! FUCK!!!!! SO COOL!!!

I can watch Bucky Barnes throwing himself off a motorcycle all day long. 

Bucky stopping his fight to save everyone.

John Walker and his stupid Walmart Shield arriving just in time to add fire to fire. Thanks, bro. 

Bucky specifically being thanked for rescuing them. He’s spent so much time with so much guilt that having just one person say “thank you for rescuing us” actually made him pause. He’s spent so much time as the “villain” that he’s forgotten he can be the hero and it’s so good to see that finally hit him. 

The metal arm scraping across the ground. Good god. 

Sam popping out of the water and “Boy, you earned this ass whooping!”

That helicopter scene holy SHIT is Sam amazing. 

And some applause for Ayla, too!!!! 

John Walker ultimately choosing to save people instead of going on with his vendetta. Very comic book in character. 

Bucky watching in horror as the van is slowly going over the edge and then smiling in wonder and awe as Captain America saves them all. 

“That’s the Black Falcon there! I tell you!” “Nah. That’s Captain America!” Tears. Actual tears. SO MANY TEARS. Sam Wilson IS CAPTAIN AMERICA, baby!!!

Uh, yeah, so Bucky stopping weapons mid-air is one of my favorite things ever.

Okay, Batroc, go the fuck away now, we’re done with you. 

I do like that when push comes to shove, the mission outweighed their personal grudges and Sam and Bucky “teamed up” with Walker. Not that it was 100% trust on their side. I think Bucky followed Walker bc “eeeeh....can we really trust him?” and since he has no doubt Sam can handle himself, but also, we’re fighting the same thing right as of this moment so lets just keep our heads and do it. 

I am absolutely not thrilled with the direction they took Sharon. Like. Not at all. I’m...reserving full judgement for what I’m assuming will come in the future but like. No. Nuh-ah. Not happy with it.

Sam trying so hard to help Karli. The fact that he legit refused to fight her and she tried so hard to get him to fight back and he just wouldn’t. So beautiful and poignant. Sam’s fighting style. Sam perseverance. Just. Everything about that.

As good as the scene was (and I think it was great. The set up. How it all went down. The raw emotion) I’m kinda bummed they killed Karli. I was hoping Sam could at least talk her down first. However, the emotion and symbolism of her dying in his arms, and whispering “i’m sorry” was so heartbreaking. 

The way Bucky and Walker got the rest of the Flag Smashers was hilarious.

Sam carrying Karli’s body cradled in his arms and flying down with her like a literal angel? I mean. Just rip my heart out. 

“You have to stop calling them terrorists.” and “Your peacekeeping troops carrying weapons are forcing millions of people into settlements around the world, right? What do you think those people call you.” These first few lines of Sam’s speech. God, thank you.

Sam’s Captain America Speech. No fuck’s given. I’m so glad they didn’t hold back and just let him really give that powerful speech. Unabashedly saying “I’m a Black man carrying the stars and stripes. What don’t I get?”. Admitting the weight that comes with it and the judgement he feels. Not backing down. Telling the world he is Captain America “no super serum, no blond hair or blue eyes”. Defending Karli and trying to get them to understand what she was trying to do and why she was trying to do it. Sam was 100% born to be Captain America. 

Everyone watching Captain America’s speech. Bucky. Walker. Isaiah and Eli. Joaquin. Sarah. The world. Beautiful watching Captain America deliver his first speech. 

“Sorry I was texting so all I heard was Black guy in stars and stripes...nice job, Cap.” That back clap Bucky gives Sam there? ((#boyfriends))

“Can you help?” “Always.” 

Very happy that Zemo had another villain move up his sleeve. Didn’t really dig the whole “i’m so graceful feel sorry for me” thing. 

John Walker becoming US Agent.  

Oh and, excuse me while I geek out over Valentina, Walker, Zemo...@marvel, I see where this might be headed. Please don’t let me down!

Bucky making his amends with Nakajima. The overwhelming emotions. The fear of admitting it. I kinda wish we saw a little more but I’m also okay with the ambiguity of it and knowing that Bucky knows that he at least gave him closure and is coming to accept that his role as the winter soldier was not his fault. 

Also liked Bucky giving the book to his therapist. I know it’s an unpopular opinion, but I take no issues with her and I do think that Bucky felt she helped him.

Eli Bradley is fucking adorable. 

Sam’s conversation with Isaiah. All that hope he represents while not erasing the pain that Isiah and generations before them suffered. Still wanting to fight for what’s right just because it’s the right thing to do. Isaiah not condemning Sam’s choice. Beautiful and poignant. 

Um. The museum scene? Yeah, I had to pause for a good ten minutes before I could actually continue with the show. Isaiah Bradley and all his men deserved that ((and so much more)) for so long. The catharsis so visible when Isaiah hugs Sam so tight. The zoom in on the statue. Okay, I’m crying again. 

Yeah, so when Bucky’s boyfriend has a BBQ he shows up like dancing like a dork with a cake and plays with all the kids.

Honestly, happiness looks so good on him. It’s so nice to see that again. 

They really ended it with Sam and Bucky embracing and walking off together in the sunset. 

CAPTAIN AMERICA AND THE WINTER SOLDIER

Again, still not thrilled with what’s going on with Sharon but clearly they’re setting up for something so...I’m putting a bookmark in to hold my judgement. 

Bc honestly, my biggest focus is:

CAPTAIN AMERICA AND THE WINTER SOLDIER

CAPTAIN AMERICA AND THE WINTER SOLDIER

CAPTAIN AMERICA AND THE WINTER SOLDIER

CAPTAIN AMERICA AND THE WINTER SOLDIER

Seriously though, overall, I think this was one of the best things Marvel has put out there in a while and I know I’ll come back to it again and again. Here’s hoping to more Cap to come!!!! 

[amberwild420]

one step back, two steps forward (pt. 8)

masterlist

family dinner

The girls chatted as they stepped out of the school. Luka and Kagami promised to meet them there so they can all go for the dinner. And true to their words they were there.

 Luka! Kagami! So glad you could make it!

 I wouldn’t miss our duel for anything.

Kagami slightly smiled. Since lunch, she had been looking forward to the duel. Luka merely smiled and the group walked towards Kaylan’s home.

  When Kaylan told them about class and the drama that unfolded after class, they were angry but pleased when Kaylan used Bustier’s words against the class.

 You seriously need to teach me how to trash talk!

 Marinette laughed. All the responses and comebacks that Kaylan had used till now made her days.

I can teach you but you have to toughen up first. What they are doing is wrong and I want you to save yourself.

 Marinette gave a sad smile. Luka, Kagami and Kaylan shared a look.

 I trust them that they can realize the truth and everything will be back to how it was.

 I don’t think so.

 Kaylan fired back. She stopped, making the rest stop too. She had a blank face but her eyes were calculating.

Marinette…..*sigh*………..look I know you say that everything will be ok or that you trust them, but……but deep down you know that after what they had done, you won’t be able to trust them……………..at least not like before………you know before all this started. As for that everything will be alright……….it’s just as connected to the trust. You think it will be alright but you know that your trust and relationship will be strained. So much that slowly and sub-consciously you will cut them out.

 Marinette made a face. A flash of coldness passed through her eyes. But it was gone before she mumbled,

 You wouldn’t know that.

I know that. I have seen that. Or rather someone close to me had seen that and told me.

 For a moment they looked vulnerable. But it was gone when Marinette nodded. She seriously needed to talk to Tikki. She was good at listening and giving advises.

 Come on we don’t want to be late.

 They silent moment broke and they walked towards the apartment building.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The woman smiled sweetly and welcomed the trio in. As soon as they settled in the woman started mothering them, hugging them tightly, asking them of their day, talking non-stop.

Mom! You are overwhelming them. Slowdown will ya!

 The woman stopped abruptly and smiled sheepishly when she saw the expression of the trio.

 Sorry. Sorry. I was just excited that you made so many friends in such a short time.

 *sigh* this is Veronica Fox, my mother. She is a freelance psychiatrist. And yes, she is the one who made the banshee therapy for akuma prevention.

 Oh! It’s nice to meet you kids. I’m so happy you made friends with my broody daughter.

 I’m not broody. Batman brood. I sit back and judge……… And fight when they irritate me.

 Marinette nervously laughed not knowing what was going on. The difference between the mother and daughter was like sun and moon. And judging by Kagami’s attempt to hide her smile and Luka’s quite snicker they must have thought the same.

 She could feel Tikki’s amusement from her purse.

 At least someone’s having fun.

 She thought and sighed.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The small training room was cozy. Their apartment was not by any mean big and luxurious but it wasn’t too small. The two bedrooms, a living room, a guestroom, a kitchen and a spare room turned to training room was definitely not small. Kagami was attracted towards the small assortment of the blades on the wall.

 A beautiful long bladed spear stood tall in the center. The shine and sharpness of the blade gave her a sense of satisfaction.

Next to it was a double bladed weapon. Marinette who stood behind Kagami looked confused.

 I don’t think I had ever seen this type of weapon in your collection Kagami. What type of weapon is this?

 She whispered to the Japanese girl who looked rather stunned.

A naginata!        Kaylan called from behind them. Veronica left the teens to get started for the evening tea. Luka also joined the girls, giving out an impressed whistle.

 It’s not easy to wield a weapon of this caliber. Not without years and years of practice.

 Kagami looked impressed.

 Wait were her eyes shining like all those anime characters she had seen or was Marinette hallucinating?

 Kaylan looked amused. She picked up the blade in question and went in the middle of the room. The rest waiting in the side in anticipation. Kaylan stood with her eyes closed mentally preparing to do a simple trick rather then something complicated.

With a sigh, she opened her eyes and spin the pole around her with a familiar ease and pointed it towards Kagami, who looked like a child in a candy store.

Smiling softly she put the weapon back to where it belonged.

 It was impressive!

 Kagami said with a wide smile. If it wasn’t her ability to school her emotion she would be rumbling like Marinette normally does.

 I’m glad you thought so. To me it is like a fish to water. That’s why I learned to fight with this far quicker.

 Uh………..       Marinette didn’t know what to ask but she shuffled around nervously before opening her mouth to ask her a question.

 Is it really hard to fight with this two blade pole?

Yes. / It is.

 Both girls said at the same time. They looked at each other before turning towards the designer.

 Wielding a naginata requires a lot of practice. Especially for women. First because of the height and weight that requires a lot of upper body strength. This one is normal length mostly used by samurai’s. Women warriors use one smaller and lighter.

 Kagami told them rather eagerly. She wanted to learn. But her affinity was with sword. But to see one here and someone to use a weapon she longed to learn right in front of her was making her warm in chest.

 It’s not just the upper body strength………        Kaylan interrupted.

Normal naginata have only one blade. Mine has double blade. It makes it even more difficult to practice. You can’t get distracted. Or one of the two blades can cut you.

 Kagami nodded. This is exactly what made this weapon so magnetic for her. She turned to the wall and picked up the only katana from the wall.

  The beautiful white sheath with small patterns and beautifully crafted handle. Marinette subtly took out her sketch book, suddenly inspired by a sword to make a base line of her next dress.

 Kagami unsheathe the sword, admiring the blade before turning to Kaylan.

 I believe a duel is in order.

 Kaylan only smirked before taking her sword and turning towards the sparring mat. Kagami unsheathed her own saber but was bummed out when Kaylan didn’t unsheathed her own but didn’t comment on it.

 Luka who was silent all this time, stepped forward to act as referee since Marinette was in her zone.

Both girls got in position, blades pointing each other. The moment Luka signaled both clashed. Both countering the other, not letting other to take advantage of the opening.

 Marinette looked at the dual fascinated. Tikki the ever loving god/Kawami was recording the dual. (She is still hiding in the purse mind you. She just doesn’t want her chosen’s friend to get into trouble when they clearly forgot about the promised video.)

 It was until Kagami thrust her saber point blank and it hit Kaylan in the shoulder when she tried to block it. A moment of silence passed before Kaylan chuckled and relaxed.

 Not bad, Tsurugi!

 Kagami who looked rather bewildered. Apparently she didn’t thought it would actually hit. But she relaxed when Kaylan laughed. She smiled.

 Not too bad yourself, Fox.

 Best out of three?

 I don’t mind.

 And with that they positioned themselves again.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next two rounds were a tie and another win for Kagami, though it was longer than any match Kagami ever participated.

 I would have won if it was my trusty pole.

 Kaylan said, before putting the katana back to its place. Kagami let out a hum of affirmation. No doubt there, she was good at handling it. They turned to the pair of whip coiled at the wall.

A silver whip with a small curved blade.

And another with golden handle and an arrow like blade. Both adorn the wall, with a grace of their own.

 How good are you with a whip?

 It was Marinette who asked this time. Her eyes were calculatingly looking at the weapon. If she is good with such weapons then giving her a miraculous with an unconventional weapon will be easy for her to use in akuma battle.

 Better than sword. Almost as good as gladiator.

 The trio raised an eyebrow. She smiled sheepishly before gesturing towards the naginata.

 You named that thing?        Kagami looked rather amused. The designer and the musician snickered when Kaylan let out a dramatic gasp.

 How dare you call gladiator a thing?! He is my trustworthy ally.

 The trio laughed. A whine that was more like complaining sounded. A smile rose to her lips, Veronica looked at the old picture on the fridge. It was two of them, she cried when she first held her smiling daughter. It was one of her favorite memory.

Her life hasn’t been easy. No friend. No family. But it felt nice to hear her talking to friends, laughing. Maybe it was the right decision to come here despite the emotional terrorist.

 Kids, have some snacks! God forbid I can’t have any more kids with no self-care.

 MOM!!!

 And one again the laughter rose.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Taking a bite of the fruit sandwich, Marinette hummed in satisfaction. Fruit tart and fruit trifle were available in bakery but……… she definitely need to get the recipe.

 Kagami looked right at home. Well, considering it was from her home country. Luka, Kaylan and her mother were tending to their tea.

 Now that we all are gathered……..let’s begin the interrogation.

 Veronica winked at the kids making them giggle while Kaylan rolled her eyes fondly.

 So I know about Marinette being the aspiring fashion designer that could give other designer a run for their money, what about two of you? I don’t think any of you was mentioned before.

That’s because we met today and I decided that are worth my time and effort. Unlike some liars and dumb sheep that share only one brain cell which could die anytime now.

 Veronica lightly slapped her on the thigh, but Kaylan just shamelessly smirked. The trio exchanged knowing glances.

 Yep, they were like sun and the moon. Not like mother, like daughter kind.

 Kagami is a world class fencer. She had won many gold medals in every single competition and she is training for the Olympus.

 Marinette excitedly started talking. The girl in question had a very tiny blush on her cheeks when her friend kept gushing about her.

I’m actually a guitarist, I was with the kitty section but now I’m going solo.

 And Luka sometimes intern with Jagged Stone, he can hear the songs of the soul.

 That’s nice I’m sure you wouldn’t mind telling me what type of music my soul emits?

 The said boy nodded before closing his eyes and focusing while everyone else held their breath when they saw Luka frowning. It wasn’t like the unpleasant frown when he heard Lila’s song. But more like he couldn’t figure out how to tell.

It’s…………

 Everyone leaned forward batting their breath waiting for him to speak.

 It’s ……it’s like many different melodies mixed together. Not like a mush or anything unpleasant. More like…..orchestra? No more like a mix classic and rock band.  

 Veronica looked eager to learn about the mixed melody. Kagami and Marinette looked curious as well. Kaylan just calmly sipped her tea before interrupting.

 Let me guess? Sharp and fast notes of violin, upbeat of a drum? That’s her alright.

here

She got another hit from her mother but she just rolled her eyes hiding her smile behind the cup.

 You don’t need to hide it mom, anyone who dares to antagonize you learn about your gentle sharpness, your excitement and upbeat personality is what everyone you meet knows. What else is there to hide?

 True.    Luka said as his eyes turned to the woman in question.

 However there is softness hiding underneath those sharp notes, your love.

Veronica looked rather pleased. She was beaming.

 Oh! Oh! What about my daughter?!

 I don’t want you to hear it.

 She flat-out refused. A little pestering occurred but she just fondly rolled her eyes.

 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Playing mortal combat, while sharing stories with each other was a good time pass. Marinette sharing her experience about being clumsy even if she could haul a 50kg bag of flour on her shoulder with ease. Kagami sharing her training and fencing experience. Luka telling them about all the melodies he had ever heard and how Marinette was the most beautiful one he ever heard (cue lots of blushing and whining and teasing). Kaylan sharing her moving around experience and difference in cultures.

 Time passed quickly and it was time for dinner. It was rather pleasant. A few jokes passed around. When they left, Veronica insisted they come to their place whenever they feel like it. They were welcomed to return when they felt like it.

 It would be best if you kids come around more often. I’m a therapist and I can see the amount of stress you kids are shouldering. It is not good normally but it is worse when you are emotionally hostage of a terrorist. So come by when you feel like you have to unwind. I might not be able to give a 100% solution but a better coping system will be nice. So don’t hesitate.

 Kaylan looked as serious as her but didn’t say anything. They bid their farewell and left.

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[nothisis-ridiculous]

Take Me Home Now: Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten: Another Mother's Breakin'

Set after the events of ME3.

A rewrite. Ao3.

FemShepxKaidan

"Jane."

The recruit let the knocking go on for a third round, slowly shaking herself from the rickety cot. While these digs were nothing as fancy as the bunk back at the mall, the privacy was a paradise. Blank, dull, metal-lined walls were a price she was willing to pay over the colorful and plant-lined walls of the barracks. The humming noise of life rebuilding, no she belonged in the silence.

"Jane." This time her name was a statement, backed by a hint of threat.

"Just a moment," she groaned, rubbing the crust from the inner corners of her eyes, pushing sore muscles upright and forcing a shirt over her head but allowing it to fall at its own pace. Her pupils narrowed at the sudden influx of light filling her half of the crate, "morning?"

Helen looked her up and down, that damned frown a returning friend, "you should put a comb through that hair."

"For fuck's sa-"

The woman made a sudden jerk, but it stopped with a simple raising of her arm, brushing aside a fallen lash, "language, dear."

"Sorry," Jane's eyebrows narrowed, had she forgotten she was not a child, "why are you here?"

"Because we are going out."

"Don't I have three more days?" Jane returned.

The older woman in a rare admittance of defeat sighed, offering back a raised eyebrow, "you're well aware that was a ruse."

"I knew it!" she didn't.

"Yes, let's be proud that you are stubborn as they warned," Helen retorted with a hint of a smirk, "but you should be ready. I'm not going to let you slide and get breakfast, either!"

Yes, this encampment was a military installment, but it gave no reason to ready herself with the rest of the soldiers. Since Rahna had given up on her she did little to get out of her bunk. So far, her secret remained, but pushing it by becoming a regular around camp seemed too big of a risk. Evelyn gave her some reason to get out, but the kid quickly found friends. Within days she was no longer needed, though the shit still visited at least once a day that prodded her into some form of semblance. The lack of duties cemented her decision to remain secluded, bidding her time with the running videos in her head.

"So why me?" Jane pressed once they cleared the base by a few thousand meters, pulling the ration bar from her mouth.

The woman's dark eyes turned cross, "and don't you waste those rations."

"You'll never want them again after fresh produce," Jane murmured, swallowing down the bland brick of nutrition in three bites.

"The second reason for coming out here," Helen handed over a pistol, "fresh meat and pest removal."

"You know, someplace on Illium would sell Varren skewers as a delicacy," Jane overlooked the pistol with a grin, "man, could that krogan grill up a mean varren skewer."

"The pistol is back up; you should use biotics. No stunts," she warned without heed of her companion's previous comment.

"I'm a paragon of caution," Jane mumbled in response, deciding then it was best to follow after the woman in silence. Pausing only as her leader stopped.

"No stunts," a finger waggled at her, "that kid and her grandfather want you back, and I intend to see that through, despite your best attempts."

Jane giggled, "the LT would love that one."

"Dismiss it all you like, whinge that someone cares about your sorry hide," the woman spat, "you're being selfish. Everyone is hurting if you haven't noticed."

Jane's face drew blank, "while it's true, doesn't it feel better to be pissed off? To be angry that everything is changed? Fuck everyone else. I'm hurting." She looked over the horizon, directly into the blue beam that connected to the Citadel. It seemed so tiny from here, so insignificant.

Helen's gaze followed Jane's gaze, "trying to remember how much worse it could be rarely helps."

"I like to make myself feel better by telling myself that I'm angering out of grief; it's one of the stages, right? But what is there after it? I don't want to let it go and accept my world is gone," Jane's voice mellowed to a whisper, "acceptance is terrifying. It means you have to move forward."

They shared a silent moment together, connecting with a brief touch—neither alone as they thought.

"Who did you lose?"

"My heart."

"Who did you lose?"

"...my heart."

Horizon- Horizon was an awkward fumbling in the dark. An overhanded display The Illusive Man decided to lord over her. He knew her strings and just how to pluck them to make her dance to his tune. Pulling Kaidan into the entire mess with the Collectors was a threat. But as messy and powerless as the knowledge of what the Illusive Man would take from her was the undercurrent of hope. It was foolish to be caught up in the giddy excitement of returned love, But Kaidan loved her. The first confession and bitter tug on her heart. She should have told him then.

Mars- Mars was just as awkward. Running, sliding, and dodging bullets after months of being cooped up in a small apartment awaiting trial. Sideways glances, and a Major who wouldn't stop dogging her every step. He questioned, prodded, and accused her of terrible things. Granted, she well deserved it. He was so close, so in sync as if the years were mere minutes... yet the distance between them was a canyon wide. But the Major loved her, even if it was once upon a time. A lighthearted exchange broke some of the tension, but she still should have told him then.

The Citadel- "What's up" had to be the lamest greeting after an armed standoff. Not a clasping hug, not a gentle smile, instead she vocalized her worry that he was angry. She hadn't taken the shot at Udina, and she had made Kaidan make that impossible decision. To trust her word, to trust an ex-terrorist. It was too much to ask of anyone- but now she was someone he was in love with. Not a past tense, a was, but a current thing. Still, she fumbled, asking him to let her have it and killing any hope of a romantic reunion. Her stolen glances at his backside caught in the act gave him a sheepish glance away and not the confession he was owed.

The Citadel Pt. II- After a shamelessly little amount of convincing, she had found herself in a dress. It was supposed to be simple- a snack on the Citadel. But she had hoped for more, the flirting, the longing stares, compliments, and a little bit of girlish enthusiasm from Kaidan she dared to think they had a chance. It was the first 'I love you' the extra 'I always have' sending her heart fluttering into erratics that she fought to control, lest she make a scene. The graze of his tender lips against her palm relinquished any grasp she had left on that errant heart, the thundering of the heartbeat clouding her brain. The jealousy the rest of her skin felt for her palm stealing another confession.

2181 Despoina- Kaidan would always rue his attraction to adventurous women. Not the woman, but the spark that drove him there. She was always at risk; her daily amount of adventure qualified as a heroic event for most other citizens of the galaxy. For her, it was a normal Tuesday night. But still, he worried, and still, he continued to love her for the constant stress she brought him. Loved her recklessness because it was as much part of her as her freckles. In the wordless hours of the night, his grip always tighter after a harrowing encounter, she was silent.

The Normandy- Neither of them wanted a quick drink. It was a little silly, after all these years, after all his confessions, to still feel insecure about inviting Kaidan up to her cabin. Instead of being direct, he invented the excuse of a short drink to see her. To comfort each other- when they both knew they needed it. Everything felt so final, the end a ticking bomb, an end to the short time they had together. She found strength in him, a safety in knowing she had someone that would catch her. He loved her openly and proudly. He loved her without needing the words returned.

London- It was unreal, after three years finally approaching the finish line. Loss and love in equal measure. Now, it was time for her to go it alone. It was unnatural, and she fought against the notion. She didn't want to be alone- not at the end. Not after this blissful glimpse into the way love had brightened every facet of her being. Kaidan would gladly face a bitter end with her, going arm in arm to meet Garrus at the bar. But it was a fucked kind of love that pushed her to make him leave. The same love that screamed at him to get the hell off the Normandy, the love that now albeit gently pleaded with him to live. It wasn't a roar or a cry of victory but a rumble- a tender declaration. Kaidan knew, even if it took him repeating his love a thousand times over. Six was a good number, short. The heart knew it was needed.

"So refresh my memory," Jane questioned in a whisper, trying not to draw the entire den of Varren upon them at once, "just how many we are planning on bringing back?"

"Are you that keen on vaporizing them all?"

"I certainly can."

"Wouldn't that defeat one of our goals?"

"Well, I don't think you accounted for the transportation of a Varren," Jane noted, looking behind them at the lack of vessel to transport said game.

Jane was ignored with a huff, the woman peering around a blockade, "I want that one."

Jane took a look, the brown striped specimen had to top the list of heaviest varren she had seen, "seriously?"

"Yes. Jane."

"Aye, Aye, Ma'am."

There wasn't time for a seething look or the smarmy reply that would have followed. The creature floated, air-bound as if the weight of the animal defied gravity. It kicked at the air, unable to stop itself from moving toward the barrier that blocked the scent of view of its hunters. Jane yanked her hand forward, dragging against the invisible weight. It felt good, if not for the shred of panic that she might lose time again. The tell-tale sign of blood was not forthcoming.

The blast of sound ricocheting through the plaza quickly overcame any remaining fear.

"Whatever you do, do not approach these things," the recruit barked, yanking the older woman into the corner spot, "they will overwhelm you if they get close."

"Aye, Aye, Ma'am."

The pack burst from all corners, running full boar in the direction of their fallen packmate. Several running members fell in the chaos, while a line of biotic energy sent the group careening into nearby walls and structures. For what inexperience was worth, Helen held up well, keeping up trained focus on the beasts. The old lady had precision aim, wasting hardly a clip during the charge. Jane didn't have to pick up much slack. Now, if there were a third member, everything would be peachy.

The square was silent for a count of three before a single varren cried out loudly.

The alpha was on scene.

While she had not promised to keep from committing to a hair-brained stunt, biotic shockwaves and lifts were boring. A teenage biotic could perform these moves without a sweat, a N7 needed a challenge. She needed the thrill. Blue waves coalesced and pulsed around her form, the familiar vibration against her skin pleasurable. A fluid vault over the barrier propelling her charge into the lone Varren, sending it toppling from the blow. Jane dove for it, pummeling it with blasts of biotic energy until her knuckles bled.

This was no longer a stunt but a method of release.

"Seems those biotics are back online," Helen murmured, wiping something from her eyes.

Jane cocked her head, "where'd you learn to shoot?"

"That? Oh. I thought they'd go out like a coyote."

The blonde smirked, dismounting the alpha's corpse, wiping her fists against a clean portion of the animal's hide. Nothing from Tuchanka went down quietly.

Helen stood over her prize, after a long minute she looked at Jane expectantly, "aren't you going to grab that?"

"Your trophy, your struggle," Jane folded her arms in return, a sly grin crossing her face, "besides, by the way we snuck out of that base, I don't need any more blame for this... what would you call this, stunt?"

"We did not sneak-" but the woman's face betrayed her guilt.

"Yeah, it's normal procedure to hop a barricade at the precise moment the guard changed," Jane knew a thing or two about sneaking out. She'd even stolen a ship twice.

Helen didn't have to struggle with the corpse long before Jane took pity on the woman; she had an unfair advantage anyway. Genetic enhancements, bone grafting, and a little biotic lifting. Unfortunately, she would still be sore when they got back to base.

"Why the need to sneak out anyway? I'm sure you could have roped anyone into helping you," Jane was under no illusion that the woman had any particular like for her, if anything, the woman looked at her with increasing scrutiny.

"None of them would dare."

"Oh?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Jane understood the sentiment completely.

[zuko-always-lies]

Dark Truths That Post-Comics Azula Fics/Headcanons Have to Handwave or Directly Confront to Be Believable[submitted by justanotherthrowaway1950]

Note: I know that you don’t like the comics and how, among many other things, they butchered Azula’s character. But considering you are one of the leading pro-Azula blogs on Tumblr imo, I am interested to see your answer to my post. Especially since I am currently writing a post-Imbalance fic that deals with the very issues I have outlined in this post. Also, could you please put “submitted by justanotherthrowaway1950” instead of “submitted by anon” on the posts I send to you? Thanks!

I am not a fan of the comics, especially since they use Azula’s mental issues as an excuse to keep her a villain and justify her demonization/abuse.

Thus, I understand the sympathy for comics!Azula treatment, especially considering what happened, and what was implied, in The Search.

But why should anyone in-universe or outside have any sympathy for, or want to help, Azula post-Smoke and Shadow since she has essentially become a domestic terrorist who is an ongoing threat due to her desire to remake Zuko in her image/ancestors’ image?

Especially considering her power buff which makes her all but unbeatable except for, imo, an AS Aang fighting with lethal intent or bloodbenders also fighting with lethal intent?

And before you say this is anti-Azula, how would you feel if it was one of your kids/siblings that got kidnapped; or one of the many people the New Ozai Society hurt, or almost hurt/killed, after Azula started “supporting” them; or one of asylum guards she likely attacked when she broke out her fellow Fire Warriors; or one of the people who got assaulted by Azula/the Fire Warriors; or the world leaders who rightly fear what Azula would do in order to break her brother considering this is the same girl who bloodlessly conquered Ba Sing except for killing The Avatar and effortlessly repelled an invasion without killing the opposing force?

And the above is (partially) why I don’t understand why people think Mai & Ty Lee, or even Zuko, post-Smoke & Shadow would want to help, or leave alone, Azula instead of killing her. Or at least without serious changes of heart caused by new information, new circumstances, and/or Azula changing her course of behavior.

Ty Lee attacks Azula even when Azula is restrained and can’t sleep peacefully once she learns Azula is free. Mai calls Azula a psycho numerous times, is pissed Azula got out of prison, had her bro kidnapped by Azula, has tried to kill Azula multiple times, and her father is in jail because of Azula. And Zuko clearly believed that Azula would have killed him before hearing her plans for him, she kidnapped Kiyi, and made him look like a fool in front of his nation/the international community.

So, in sum, Zuko, Mai and Ty Lee do want to, at the very least, jail Azula and with Azula’s current mindset, the only thing left imo is for The Gaang plus Mai & Ty Lee to confront Azula in an epic final battle where Zuko has to do what he likely would have done at the Final Agni Kai if had Azula directly shot lighting at him and kill her, leaving him broken hearted and wondering, alongside Mai & Ty Lee, what could have been if she hadn’t been twisted by Ozai (and her asylum abuse if Zuko could ever be assed to research why her mental condition got worse).

And yes, a lot of my fics do deal with the post-comics status quo. And yes, I do tend to handwave the issues I do describe.

Though in my defense it is because I have at least one fic planned that tries to seriously deal with the issues I brought up in this chapter and thus I wanted to write about post-comics scenarios without having to write what would likely be a monster of a fic/fic series.

So what do you guys think about my ramblings? Coherent thoughts or hypocritical ramblings of a jackass?

--Submitted by justanotherthrowaway1950

I don’t consider the comics worth my time at all, and, I’ve looked at the transcripts for some of them but have never bothered reading the actual comics.

But in fact there are a lot people who would feel an extreme amount of sympathy for Azula, they’re just not the main characters.  Many people in the upper, middle, and lower classes in the Fire Nation and the former colonies would see Azula as exemplary figure, the conqueror of Ba Sing Se and hero of the Nation.  The whole “Fire Warriors” thing doesn’t seem to have gotten out in public, and any claims of Azula’s involvement are likely to be seen as Zuko’s propaganda.  

Meanwhile, Zuko is a traitor who allied with foreign enemies to seize the throne, with the official story about his and Iroh’s actions during the war being so damning that people are convinced that he must be covering up something even worse.

So there are a lot of people who would be interested in helping Azula, they are just not necessarily people who would lead her toward a better path.

As for Mai, she apparently has no long term hard feelings about Team Avatar using Tom-Tom as a hostage, so a doubt she would hold what happened to Tom-Tom in Smoke and Shadows against Azula long term.

But, in general, Azula can’t control how other people treat her, but she can control how she treats other people. And even in Smoke and Shadow she’s not written as someone who wants her former friends dead. !Comics Zuko is such a toxic personality that Azula should stay away from him, but you can write Azula as saving Mai and Ty Lee’s lives in a difficult situation and otherwise helping them, and maybe casually saying something which leads to them to realize she might have been badly abused in the asylum. And they investigate and find out the truth, which neither of them was really aware of since I don’t believe in writing them as awful people.

If we go with the line that the comics try to push that “Mai and Ty Lee never liked or cared about Azula at all and were only pretending to be her friend,” than there’s nothing to salvage because there never was a real relationship, but we should probably ignore that.

[razorblade180]

Looking Back

[Lasting Embers au spoilers]

A constant in life is that life is constantly changing; a concept known to any huntsman that were worth their salt on the battlefield. As well as anybody who chose a dangerous life style. For Adam, it was the second constant in his life. The first was the stary void that dawned over him with its trillions of stars. It might be the only real perk of night watch. It was his turn to keep an eye out for any enemy that could’ve been following him and the rag tag fever dream of a team he found himself with. When Jacquelyn told him life is a story that goes the way each person decides, he never imagine somehow he had written a story that would lead him to helping members of team RWBY, their families, and his as well. Crazy for sure but hey, crazier had happened. This didn’t even make the list.

Yang approached him from behind with two mugs in her hand. The both of them were ordered to watch the forest clearing from the tree line. Ruby was dead set on making sure the two of them were in sync enough to fight together if things got hairy. Yang could think of a million other ways to spend the night but she wasn’t about to complain and handed him the coffee.

Yang:One coffee, black. If you’re going for something gross to keep you awake then I understand.

Adam:I told you black so you couldn’t slip anything in it.

Yang:....

Adam:Joking, I wasn’t serious. Mostly.

Yang:Your humor is more bitter than your drink. *sips* you should try to be more grounded.

Adam:That was terrible. We can’t both be bad at this or I might die from boredom alone.

Yang:Stabs to the chest didn’t end you. I doubt puns will. I’d be upset; could’ve gotten rid of you a long time ago if they did.

Adam:What can I say? I’m one lucky bastard.

Yang:I’ll say....

The blonde bruiser sat down with her head supported by her hands. Being here was awkward, too awkward. Neither of them really continued speaking. One watched the fields whil the other star gazed. Adam would sometime steal glances at Yang’s arm before going back to mapping out the sky. Yang let out a long and over the top sigh. At this point, talking to Adam couldn’t be as unbearable as saying nothing.

Yang:We should play a game.

Adam:What?

Yang:You heard me. It’ll pass the time. Besides, I’m positive Ruby will keep sticking us as partners if we don’t even pretend to get along.

Adam:Who’s pretending? I made my peace with my thoughts on you a long time ago. If I hadn’t then I wouldn’t have entertained the thought of looking over your daughter for over a decade.

Yang:Hmm is that right? Well, can’t say I’m not entirely over that hump.

Adam:This makes the fourth of fifth time you’ve told me that. You need new material. Freeing Jackie, me, when I showed up at your home, the train ride; I get it. Messaged received.

Yang:Tsk, no need to sound smug about it.

Adam:I’m not. I just don’t see a reason for you to state the obvious. You don’t forgive someone who shouldn’t be forgiven. What, are you upset because people like your sister don’t share the sentiment?

Yang:Why bring Ruby up and not Blake?

Adam:Like I said, stating the obvious. How are you two though? You’ve had plenty of time to properly bury that hatchet.

Yang:We’re just fine. Even before this whole cult shit.

Adam:Good. It’s already insane you two “killed” me and didn’t get together. I’d feel some type of way if you weren’t even friends. Talk about a let down.

Yang:You’re the reason- ugh, why the hell am I even trying to hold a proper conversation with you? I might as well pull my hair out...

Adam:....The hate game.

Yang:What?

Adam:It’s the game I wanna play. You and another person take turns talking about something you hate about the other.

Yang:That....sounds so stupid.

Adam:That’s the spirit, I’ll go first. You’re really loud all the time. Ever heard of a inside voice?

Yang:That’s rich coming from the screaming goat. All you ever did was scream Blake’s name.

Adam:All you ever did was scream in general. I hate how you always seem to butt into everything. It’s one thing to help a friend but you like act like you have a right to have an opinion on people you know by association.

Yang:I don’t need to know much about a terrorist to know you’re terrible.

Adam:I hate how you haven’t realized this is the first time you’re judging me by the crimes I committed for the first time, instead of claiming I was nothing but fake towards Blake and Ilia.

Yang:....

Adam:Everything is personal with you.

Yang:Says the hypocrite.

Adam:I won’t deny that. You feel better or you got more on your chest?

Yang:We’d be here for years if I said it all.

Adam:Then say the important ones I know you wanna say. “I hate that you’re still alive.” Or is it “I can’t stand your dismissive attitude?” The fact anybody like me was given a second-

Yang:I hate that you’ve spent more time with Yujin than me...

Adam:Oh....hmm. *lays back*

Yang:Got nothing smart to say, jackass?

Adam:Hey if you raised my kid with me barely around, I’d hate you too. Can’t fault you for that one.

Yang:It’s a twisted joke really. So many people to look over her from afar and it’s you. What was Sun thinking?

Adam:We were under staffed and things got ugly really fast. Decisions had to happen quickly. Plus the threat was clearly too unknown and dangerous to half ass anything. They killed two of you after all.

Yang:It would be wise to keep that incident out of your mouth. Ruby might tolerate you but that’ll change before I can even lift a finger.

Adam:Now you’re warning me? I thought your sister stomping me out would make your day.

Yang:Dude...shut up.

Adam:....What happened to your uncle and friend was terrible, sorry.

Yang:Ugh, even you saying that feels so wrong.

Adam: Please, thank you, and I’m sorry aren’t that hard. It’s not even new. The white fang wasn’t all snarls and chanting like you think. For awhile I pretty calm there.

Yang:The key word being “awhile.” You murdered your own.

Adam:Yep.

Yang*grits teeth* That’s all you say? People keep saying you’re different left and right and yet you don’t seem even a little regretfull. You’re sipping coffee and staring at the stars as if you hadn’t spent most of your life ruining other’s! What part of that sounds like a change of heart!?

Adam didn’t break his attention away from those stars. If he did, Adam would’ve no doubt seen how irritated Yang was. Her eyes burned red as she waited for an answer. Yang’s coffee was even boiling.

Yang:Well?

Adam:Regretting doesn’t bring them back, or the most heartfelt apologies. It just stirs anger. You wouldn’t feel better about your arm if I apologize.

Yang:So you choose to not even try.

Adam:No, I’ll just convince Jacquelyn to get the relic of creation whenever we eventually go to Atlas.

A perfectly good cup of coffee falls out of Yang’s hand. Did she hear that right? Adam just said he planned on creating an arm with a relic, for her!

Adam:What? It made me an eye. Making an arm is far less complicated than that. I’d say that would be better than any words I could say that you wouldn’t believe anyways.

Yang:....It’s your turn again.

Adam:Ah, let’s see. Well, if I were to be honest I guess...it really bothers me how similar you are to your daughter.

Yang:The hell does-

Adam:Let me finish before you break my ribs. That kid of yours pretty feisty and passionate about so many things. She bugged me to help train her until I finally said yes. Yujin gets frustrated easily and gets really sensitive about certain maternal subjects; yet it isn’t like she doesn’t want to avoid those conversations altogether. Seriously, your daughter is a little bit of a mess, but a fun mess. That bothers me because for a split second I can’t help but wonder that maybe if you and encountered each other on the same side in the beginning...maybe we’d be decent acquaintances or something.

Yang:D-Did you just say what I think you just said.

Adam:Who knows? I suck with words. I’m gonna rest for a little bit.

He turned his back to her to avoid eye contact. Yang couldn’t believe what she was witnessing. Was he embarrassed? Did he actually try some roundabout way of saying she was a good person? If only Blake was here for that. She would’ve flipped. Yang looked up the sky then back at the field; still nothing. When her guys went back to the stars it was curiosity.

Yang:Hey, were you staring a constellation in particular or something?

Adam:You can see Capricornus well from here. I joke all the time with Jael about that one since she’s into a shark faunus. Looking at it made me think about her is all.

Yang:Jael is your second daughter right?! I can’t believe I didn’t know that. I remember the first one for sure.

Adam:You were a little preoccupied to notice anything regarding Jael. Her and Yujin share a birthday.

Yang:No foolin!? Well how about that.

Adam:Yeah, life sure does like it’s jokes. I get a lot of flack if I’m not around for one’s birthday. Jael will get pouty and your daughter gets fussy. “You promised!” I’ve heard that too much.

Yang:Hehe, Jin might get that from me. It’s natural for your kid though. I know I wanted my dad around for mine. Even when I grew up and acted like I was too grown to really care, I wanted his birthday breakfast. Your kid looked like a real beauty.

Adam:Thanks, definitely got that from her mother.

Yang:Haha, don’t feel bad. Seeing Yujin with short hair made me think Jaune had another younger sister I just never met. His genes are way too strong.

Adam:Trust me, I’ve seen her with long hair and in the middle of a fight. I might’ve called her your name a few times.

Yang:Oof, that must’ve pissed her off.

Adam:No....she was actually surprised more than anything. Yujin never hated you Yang. Despite how she acted whenever your name was mentioned. I think she just wasn’t sure how to feel about you besides feeling lonely. I’m not any better with Jael. You wanna talk regrets, I don’t think I spent enough time with her the way I should’ve. Hopefully I’m wrong.

Yang:It’s very telling that you don’t regret your past but you regret something like that.

Adam:My past is terrible and dark, but it led me to my wife and kids. It feels wrong to regret it, so I’ll just accept it and carry on. Otherwise I don’t think I’ll ever have time to live in the present.

Yang:Geez, ever the drama queen. Though I can see a little bit of that view point. Still a spit in the face to people and yourself if you asked me.

Adam:The world thinks I’m dead and has made their mind up about me a long time ago. I go around taking down other terrorists and orginizations to keep them safe as a way to give back. I don’t owe the world anymore than that. I’m simply a remnant among Remnant. My regret is my kids have me as a dad. A kid should be able to talk about their parents and be proud.

Yang:Can’t argue with that. At least you stayed and are apart of their life. I can barely say that.

Adam:Helping save Remnant from another shadow war is a pretty strong excuse. Especially when the group has actually killed your family members. You’re just protecting them. Jaune and Yujin understand that.

Yang:....I hate that you’re not as terrible anymore. Reasonable you is too...

Adam:Reasonable?

Yang:I really hope I don’t have with this for another ten years.

Adam:I give it two, tops. You have a maiden with you this time and me. I’ll just hit you so you can get stronger and wreck shop.

Yang:Hit me and I hit you.

Adam:I’ll block, now we’re both wrecking shop.

Yang:Jacquelyn must have the patience of a saint to deal with you.

Adam:Yep, she’s pretty great. Saved my life, saved my soul. Couldn’t ask for more. You two would probably get along.

Yang:Nah, we worked together once. Wasn’t the best experience.

Adam:I was kidnapped and you were both pregnant. I’m not the smartest person but I’m positive that was a recipe for disaster. She thinks you’re cool, really respect your virtues. Sometimes it feels like she’s quoting you unfortunately.

Yang:Oh, glad I left a good impression. Maybe I can have her whisper regrets into your ear. Seriously, I regret things like lying to Ruby about tiny things yet you don’t really regret anything?

Adam:My regrets take place before the white fang. They remain in the work camp I escaped from. It’s funny, Yujin reminds me of my little sister, Eve.

Yang:Are you telling me that you, Adam, had a sister named Eve?

Adam:When you live in a place devoid of hope or faith, you cling to it in any way can. So my mother named us to help maintain hers. Probably had something to do with the loss of our father. Can’t say, never met him.

Yang:What was your mother’s name?

Adam:Don’t know. I called her mom and the gaurds called her by a serial number. Even that’s a little hazy. Anyways, sis got caught in an mining incident; mother was gunned down because I furious at a gaurd that stopped me from saving Eve.

Yang:Wow that’s umm, heavy stuff. Is that how you...*point to face*

Adam:Yeah, called it my punishment for disobeying. As far as regrets go, it would’ve been nice to be a son and brother; one that got to actually have proper meals.

Yang looked at Adam stare deeply into the void of space. It was strange. Yang has never seen Adam look mournful before. His eyes seemed to get more lost in thought by the second. A part of her felt....sorry for him.

Yang:I’m sure they’ve watched over you since day one. Who knows? Maybe they’re the real reason you’ve survived so long? If I know a thing or two about little sisters and mothers, they’ll never let you rest until you clean up your act, hehehe. Ruby can vouch for that. I bet both of them would be proud of your end result.

Adam:That’s funny. It kinda sounds like you just tried showing me compassion.

Yang:Pfft, I think you may have brain damage you didn’t know about.

Adam:Oh it’s possible. Neo and Mercury have put me through some shit.

Both of them laughed and continued to chat aimlessly, unaware that Ruby and Raven were watching from their own vantage point.

Raven:Well look at that? Maybe the gods haven’t abandoned us if people like those two can chat like that.

Ruby:Looks like our colorful team has gotten a little more stable. Now if only Weiss can get used to Nora’s snoring.

Raven:That’s seriously on your to-do list?

Ruby:I refuse to lead my team poorly this time around. I’ll do whatever I can whenever I can.

Raven:Qrow and Oscar would be proud to see you back on your feet, the right way this time.

Ruby:Can’t mourn forever. This is the mission to end all missions. I’m going full throttle...

[jaybear1701]

Chapter Summary: Scylla begins her new role as an “instructor” at Fort Salem. It goes about as well as you might expect.

“This is some shit.”

Raelle hadn’t voiced the massive understatement. Beth Treefine did. And, for once, Raelle agreed with the haughty High Atlantic. Beth’s Unit stood shoulder-to-shoulder to the left of Abigail, Tally, and Raelle in the small gym that would serve as their training ground for whatever forbidden Work they’d be learning. The walls felt like they were closing in. And Raelle couldn’t even begin to parse out the jumbling emotions that made her head spin as she watched Scylla, back in uniform, trading hushed, tense words with Anacostia and Izadora. 

“Isn’t Scylla, like, your ex?” Glory Moffett whispered out of the corner of her mouth to the Bellweather Unit’s right, brown eyes wide and round.

Heat prickled up Raelle’s neck.

Both Abigail and Tally shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other.

Beth’s head snapped toward Raelle. “Seriously, you dated a terrorist?” Her lips curled in disgust. “Why am I not surprised? You Cessions do love trash after all.”

Abigail grabbed Raelle’s wrist before she could launch herself at Beth and earn a month’s worth of demerits. “Shut your dirty, fetid mouth, Treefine, before I shut it for you,” Abigail threatened with a dangerous glare.

“Come on, Bellweather,” Beth scoffed. “Even you have to admit this is bullshit!”

“And what exactly is bullshit, Treefine?” Anacostia’s question boomed out into the confined  space. “Is following orders bullshit?” She stalked toward Beth, who stood at attention. “Or maybe it’s doing whatever it takes to crush our enemies once and for all.” Standing toe-to-toe with Beth, Anacostia stared her down. “Is that bullshit to you, Private?”

“No, ma'am.” Beth kept her eyes trained forward, fear of the Goddess in them.

“Good.” Anacostia walked down the line, glowering at each War College freshman. “The enemy of my enemy is my friend.” She paused briefly in front of Raelle before she continued on. “You’d do well to remember it.”

When she got to the last member of Glory’s unit, Anacostia returned to a position in front of the soldiers.

“For those of you who don’t already know, this is Scylla Ramshorn.” She beckoned Scylla forward. “Outside, she’s just another soldier. But here, she’ll be your instructor for the next few weeks. Treat her with anything but respect, and you’ll answer to me.” She moved to the side to stand next to Izadora.

The air thickened in Raelle’s lungs as Scylla stepped forward, fingers casually tucked in her pockets, a small smirk on her stupidly beautiful face. Except the smug smile seemed almost too stiff, a brittle mask tenuously held in place. 

Scylla cleared her throat. “I know this isn’t ideal for you,” she began, making eye contact with everyone but Raelle. “It’s not exactly a picnic for me, either. But the sooner we get through this, the sooner we can defeat the Camarilla.”

“How?” Abigail asked.

Raelle bit the inside of her cheek, while Tally stifled a groan. 

“Bellweather,” Anacostia growled.

“Ma’am, I mean no disrespect,” Abigail explained, even as she eyed Scylla with caution. “A ceasefire is one thing. I genuinely want to know how the Spree can possibly help us.”

“The same old military tactics won’t work against the Camarilla for the same reason you’ve never eradicated the Spree in two decades,” Scylla explained. Off several blank looks, she added, “You can’t kill what you can’t catch.”

“And you’ll catch them with what?” Abigail crossed her arms. “Your winning personality?”

Scylla grinned. “There’s always that.” She slid a hand into her right pocket and fished out a zippo.  “And this.” She flicked it open and lit it. Raelle’s lips parted as Scylla brought the flame to the edge of her jaw until it caught fire.

“Holy shit,” Glory gasped. 

The blaze consumed Scylla’s entire face for several seconds before it petered out, leaving a second version of Abigail, embers slowly fading from her hair. “Boo.”

Frowning, the real Bellweather stiffened. “What the hell?!”  

Dark memories of “Helen Graves” clawed at Raelle’s stomach, sharp and deep. “So, the key to defeating the Camarilla is, what, deception?” She couldn’t stop herself. It was infinitely easier to drop her filter when Scylla didn’t look like Scylla. “You’re definitely a pro at that,” she muttered, earning a jab in the ribs from Tally.

Scylla-as-Abigail blinked once, slowly. Still, she didn’t look at Raelle. Clicking the lighter once again, she burned off Abigail’s visage and returned to her own, blue eyes glowing as flames licked around her face. “If you can’t tell friend from foe, then you’re vulnerable.”

“You mean infiltrate them,” Tally said. “And expose them.”

Scylla smiled, genuinely this time. “Craven, I knew you were the brightest in your Unit.”

Abigail’s scowl intensified. “How are we supposed to infiltrate them if we can’t find them?”

“Who says we haven’t?” Scylla said in a way that unsettled Raelle, who thought back to the latest Camarilla massacre. Scylla had said she was sent to investigate, but had it been more than that? 

“So, does no one care that this Work is clearly outside Canon?” Beth unhelpfully pointed out.

Scylla regarded Beth with a look that could only be described as pity. “Canon is nothing more than a cage. Meant to keep you in check so you never realize the full extent of your power.”

Anacostia coughed into her fist and raised one brow at Scylla. 

“But I digress,” Scylla conceded. “Who wants to go first?”

No one volunteered. 

“Wow.” Scylla held up her hands, lips quirking sarcastically. “Don’t everyone answer the call at once, now.” 

“Collar, you’re up.” Anacostia’s bark was unusually loud in the awkward silence of the room.

Raelle schooled her features, even though she wanted nothing more than to glower at her former drill sergeant. Tally and Abigail watched her with thinly veiled apprehension. She followed Anacostia’s command and approached Scylla, who still refused to meet her eyes. 

“What Seeds do I use?” Raelle asked, affecting a bored drawl.

Scylla finally looked at her, and all the air squeezed out of Raelle’s lungs. “No Seeds.” She took in a breath that seemed to shake imperceptibly. “Mother Tongue.” 

Raelle’s eyebrows arched. “You’re joking.”

“Do I look like I’m doing standup?”

Scylla recited a short phrase, then repeated its serpentine staccato beats. Despite its brevity, it was difficult for Raelle to follow even as she subconsciously stared at the precise movements of Scylla’s lips. 

“Eventually you won’t have to say the words,” Scylla finished. 

“What do they mean?” Glory asked, her question startling Raelle. 

“In light shall I be cloaked ,” Scylla answered. “In darkness shall I be revealed.” Wetting her lips, she tore her gaze from Raelle to address Glory. “Our ancestors created this Work during the Burning Times. Fought fire with fire to escape from their oppressors.” Her attention returned to Raelle. “Like the Spree do now.”

“And how many die from it?” Raelle’s jaw tightened as she clenched her fists. 

Scylla’s stoic expression wavered, a crack in the facade, but she didn’t look away. “How many die from inaction?”

They started at each other for several beats, a game of chicken to see who would blink first.

“Um, hello?” An impatient Abigail interrupted, snapping them both out of their near-trance. “The Work?”

Scylla glanced at Anacostia before offering her lighter to Raelle, who made it a point to take it without brushing against Scylla’s hand. For self-preservation.

Raelle stared at golden zippo, recalling how she had seen it on the small locker Scylla had used as a makeshift nightstand; how Scylla never seemed to be without it. Now she knew why. She pushed open its cap. It took several sparks before it came to life. 

“Now, think about someone,” Scylla ordered.

“Who?”

“Anyone. Picture them in your mind.”

Raelle closed her eyes, but the only person she saw was Scylla. As if it could be anyone else. “Okay,” she said, hating herself for her weakness. 

“Good, now repeat after me,” Scylla said, once again slipping back into Mother Tongue. In light shall I be cloaked. In darkness shall I be revealed.

Raelle attempted to repeat the Work. Horribly. She tried again. And again. Tried to give shape to the words with her tongue and lips, to get used to how they felt in her mouth. 

“Now raise the flame,” Scylla said.

Opening her eyes, Raelle brought the lighter near her face. Its heat stung her jaw. 

“Don’t be afraid,” Scylla whispered.

Heart pounding, Raelle lifted her chin. “I’m not afraid.”

The challenge was clear in Scylla’s blue eyes.

Raelle drew her hand closer to her chin, but the flame was too much. It seared her skin, and she dropped the lighter with a yelp. It clattered against the floor as she cupped the burn. She wasn’t sure what mortified her more: the failure or the disappointment that flashed across Scylla’s face. 

***

In the breath between life and death, memories flooded Raelle’s vision, hazy and random like hundreds of fireflies on a summer night. Of her mom and dad. Warm smiles, tight hugs, joyous laughter. Of Tally and Abigail. Infectious optimism and steady leadership. Tough love from Anacostia. They blended and bled into her link with Abigail, whose own recollections centered on Petra, her five fathers, her Unit, Adil, and Charvel.

But in the center of the maelstrom was Scylla.

Raelle no longer felt pain from where the Camarilla’s arrow pierced her body. Instead, her chest filled with love and anguish, longing and regret. 

“Scyl.” She stretched out her arm, trying to grasp Scylla’s hand and coming up empty, a millimeter out of reach. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Scylla only smiled, a melancholy twist of her lips, sapphire eyes luminescent.

A burst of white engulfed Raelle, blinding and brilliant. Shutting her eyes tight, she felt fingers tightening around her left hand. She squeezed back. She’d never let go. 

***

Raelle absentmindedly pushed peas around on her tray, the tines of her fork scraping metal as she separated them from the sliced mushrooms. She wasn’t hungry, despite eating only half a bagel hours ago, her stomach still wound tight after that less than stellar training session with Scylla. Of all the Spree. It had to be her. The absurd coincidence reminded her of that old black-and-white movie her dad loved. How did that one line go? Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine. That was it. 

Someone nudged Raelle’s shoulder and waved a hand in front of her face, dispelling her line of thought.

“Hey.” Tally said, sympathy apparent in her warm brown eyes. “You still with us?”

“Yeah, of course.” Raelle nodded, putting her fork down. 

The crowd in the War College mess hall had grown since they arrived for lunch, as had the volume of chatter from the hungry soldiers, most if not all of them absolutely clueless about the extracurricular activities happening on campus.

“You’re thinking about her,” Abigail observed next to Tally on the other side of the table. 

“I’m not thinking about anyone,” Raelle lied even as her traitorous heart wondered where Scylla had gone with Anacostia and Izadora.

“You’re such a liar.” Abigail shook her head as she raised a glass of water to her lips. 

“Well, I’m thinking about her,” Tally chimed in. “She’s actually a decent instructor.” She shrunk underneath Raelle’s stare. “You know, all things considered.”

Abigail rolled her eyes. “You’re only saying that because you’re the only one who was actually working that Work.”   

“One of the perks of linking with a 327-year-old?” Tally leaned forward as if she was sharing a deep secret. “Instant Mother Tongue.”

“Of all the people to impersonate, though.” Abigail speared a piece of pineapple and popped it into her mouth. “Hilary? Really? I thought you were over her and Gerit.”

Tally shrugged up a shoulder and deflected, “Who did you pick?”

“My mom,” Abigail answered. “Could you imagine her face?” She shared a chuckle with Tally while Raelle continued to sulk. “How about you, Rae?”

“What does it matter?” Raelle asked, knowing full well they knew she only had one person in mind. 

“It doesn’t.” Tally reached out and gently covered Raelle’s right hand where it rested on the table. “But, you know we’re here for you. You can talk about her, if you want.” 

“Why would I?” Raelle resisted the urge to pull away, not wanting to hurt Tally’s feelings.

“Because you still need to get your shit together,” Abigail said, tone creeping into overbearing Bellweather territory that still managed to set Raelle’s teeth on edge.

“My shit’s just fine.” Raelle clung to her obstinance. Had a knack for it. It was the one thing she could still control.

“Your shit’s a mess.” Abigail’s gaze flicked over Raelle’s shoulder and she did a double take. “And it’s about to get worse.” 

Raelle swiveled in her seat, stomach dropping. As if the day couldn’t get any worse. Her mother was now approaching their table. In uniform, no less, a hesitant smile on her face. 

“Raelle,” Willa greeted softly. 

Raelle gritted her teeth so hard her jaw ached. 

“This must be your Unit,” Will said when Raelle didn’t respond, offering her hand to Abigail. “You’re Petra’s daughter. Abigail, right?”

Hesitating only briefly, Abigail stood and firmly took Willa’s hand and gave it a firm shake, once up and down. “Yes, ma’am.”

“She’s told me so much about you. I feel like I already know you.” Willa stretched a hand to Tally, who also rose to her feet to clasp it. “And you must be Tally. I knew one of your aunts. Mae? One of the finest soldiers I’ve known. She told me once that the Cravens received a dispensation from conscription.”

“Oh!” Tally’s brows shot up. “Yes, ma’am. But I… I volunteered.”

Willa blinked once. “You decided to serve even though you didn’t need to. Admirable. If only we all could have that same choice.” 

An awkward hush wrapped around them, a tense bubble amid the white noise of the mess hall.

“Well, it was nice to meet you officially, ma’am,” Abigail picked up her tray, awkwardly canting her head to encourage Tally to join her. “But we best be going.”

They reluctantly left the table, both eyeing Raelle with concern.

“I should go with them,” Raelle said, standing to collect her own things.

”Actually, I was hoping we could talk,” Willa said.

“Have you talked to dad yet?”

A hint of pain glinted in near identical blue. “No.”

“Then we have nothing to talk about.” Raelle got up and quickly deposited her tray in a receptacle. She made a beeline for the exit, hoping to catch up with Tally and Abigail. 

“Raelle, please.” Willa followed her outside into the afternoon heat. “I know you’re angry. And you have every right to be. But if you would just let me explain, you’d understand.”

“Understand what?” Raelle whirled around. “Why you abandoned us? Made us think you were dead? Sent Scylla to…” She stopped short. The last thing she wanted was to talk about Scylla. Didn’t want to even think of the possibility that Willa had deliberately assigned Scylla to train her Unit.

“Yes,” Willa said simply. “You owe me at least that much, girl.”

Temper flaring, Raelle stepped into her mom’s space. “I don’t owe you anything,” she snarled.

Raelle stalked away, emotions ablaze, a ball of pent up fury as she trekked across the grounds. She let the anger consume her, ignoring the sliver of disappointment that wrapped around her heart when her mom didn’t follow. Contrary to popular belief, she wasn’t dense. She had thought about Willa’s reasons nearly everyday. And logically, she understood.

Alder’s military system was slavery. There was no doubt about that. So many women had been forced to early deaths they didn’t choose, and the same fate awaited their daughters, and their daughters’ daughters. Her mom didn’t want Raelle to become war meat. Hell, Raelle didn’t want to become war meat. Perhaps in some twisted way, Willa thought she was also protecting Edwin, breaking his heart to keep him safe from the war. The Spree sought freedom to live their lives without fear of being hunted down and killed, like Scylla’s parents. But they were also murderers, just like the Army–both entities so mired in darkness that Raelle wasn’t sure they’d ever see the light.

She knew all this. But her heart still couldn’t get past the betrayal of it all, and the fear of everything she still didn’t know about the terrible lengths Willa had gone to in furtherance of her cause. It was easier to cling to pain and resentment, than to wade into brackish water and attempt to separate brine from the fresh. 

Her eyes began to sting and she stopped to suck in several deep breaths. She had wandered the grounds, unseeing, and somehow found herself at the base of her favorite grand oak tree. It stood massive and towering, limbs curving and snaking toward the sun, the silent keeper of memories and secret moments. Raelle braced a hand against its rough bark, pushing until it dug into her skin. She had to collect herself, or at least fake it as best she could, before her next set of classes, which included even more testing with Izadora. Or else she’d never hear the end of it from Abigail and Tally.

When her anger had cooled from a boil to a simmer, Raelle rounded the tree, intending to settle between it’s exposed roots, only to receive an unexpected jolt when she found her spot already occupied.

By Scylla.

Because, of course, it had to be Scylla. Sitting under Raelle’s favorite tree. Their tree. Where they had stolen kisses from each other and made plans for the future. Where Scylla had once lifted Raelle and spun her in her arms, carefree and in love.

Raelle’s chest constricted at the realization.

“S-sorry,” Raelle stuttered out. “I didn’t realize anyone was here.”

Startled, Scylla dropped the pen she had been holding. It rolled into the gutter of the journal she had been writing in. “Raelle…” 

Crystal blue eyes widening behind a pair of black, wire-framed reading glasses. They reminded Raele of the ones Scylla used to wear late at night in her dorm room, studying thick tomes on mycology and necromancy while Raelle dozed on her bed after a long day in the rough room. 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” Raelle started to back away. 

“You don’t have to leave,” Scylla regained her composure and picked up her pen. “I can go.”

“No, you were here first.” Raelle turned to leave. “I’ll just….” Her heel caught one of the tree’s gnarled roots. She stumbled slightly, but managed to maintain her balance, if not her dignity, face red with embarrassment.

Scylla chewed at her bottom lip. “You know, it’s a big tree. And we’re big girls. We can both stay without bothering each other.”

Raelle almost laughed. They both knew that would be impossible. And yet, the way Scylla regarded her with no expectations, an open invitation with no pressure, it made Raelle want to believe they could do it. Co-exist. If not exactly peacefully, then at least politely. 

For the mission.

At least, that’s what Raelle told herself as she ignored all her survival instincts and sat on the ground, back against the crags of the trunk a few meters away from Scylla.

Silence blanketed them, not quite comfortable but not unbearable either, as a gentle breeze ruffled the branches overhead. Scylla’s pen scratched softly against paper, and Raelle stole a glimpse of Scylla out of the corner of her eye. The sun’s rays rippled down through the leaves, light and shadow flickering over Scylla’s gorgeous profile, head bent and dark hair swaying in the wind as she resumed writing.

Unlike Willa, Scylla made no efforts to address the unspoken tension between them–more massive than any proverbial elephant. Didn’t try to explain, or apologize, beyond what had already transpired between them in that prison cell so many moons ago. Raelle wasn’t sure if that was good or bad, or if it would even change anything, regardless. 

Her stomach sank anyway. 

Because unlike with Willa, Raelle felt remorse regarding Scylla, who had been captured and tortured because she had chosen Raelle over the Spree. Regret had burrowed inside Raelle’s heart the moment Scylla had pleaded with her in that horrible dungeon. Had transformed into a gnawing guilt that continued to fester long after Raelle callously dismissed Scylla anyway, wanting to break Scylla heart the way Scylla had broken hers. Raelle had no idea how to fix it, or if she even could.

“How’s your chin?” Scylla broke the stillness.

Raelle gingerly touched the healed skin. She’d almost forgotten it had been burned in the first place. “All fixed up. Which is more than I can say about Treefine’s hair.” She had no idea the High Atlantic could screech that loudly.

Scylla let out a soft chuckle. “It’ll grow back.”

“Not at the rate we’re going.” Raelle ran her fingers through the grass, tips tickling her palm.

“It’s only the first day,” Scylla said. “It gets easier.”

“Oh yeah? How long did it take you?” Raelle asked and then instantly wished she could take it back. Scylla’s parents had probably taught her, and here she was bringing up those painful memories. “Sorry, I…”

“It’s okay.” Scylla shook her head. “A while. I didn’t want to get burned. But, eventually, you get used to it. Learn not to fear it. Until you feel nothing at all.”

I’ve been burned before, Scylla had told Raelle that one time, deep in the cemetery in the woods. Both literally and figuratively. And Raelle had contributed to it. They’d both hurt each other, intentionally and unintentionally. Raelle’s heart throbbed against her ribs. She wanted to reach out, but knew she couldn’t. Not any more.

Before she could respond, someone called out Scylla’s name. A young woman with long, brown hair beckoned from a distance. Raelle frowned.

“I have to go,” Scylla removed her glasses, voice soft. Closing her journal, she pushed herself onto her feet and dusted off her pants. “See you around, Raelle.”

“Scyl, wait,” Raelle blurted out, scrambling to her feet. She didn’t know what possessed her, but she had to get this out. 

Scylla paused, head tilting slightly. 

“What I said back then.” Raelle licked her suddenly dry lips. “About being sorry we ever met.” Hot shame spread across Raelle’s cheeks. “I didn’t mean it.” 

Scylla’s expression shifted through a myriad of emotions–surprise, pain, and sadness conveyed in each subtle twitch of her mouth and crease of her brow–until the sea of her eyes calmed. Softened. 

“Thank you,” Scylla whispered before she quickly turned around and walked away. 

[danasmonster]

Comparing the SKAM Remakes: SANA (Part I)

Sana (SKAM original)

Sana is constantly having to defend and explain herself to others - her friends, her family, strangers. We see this with Vilde when she says Sana can’t have sex, and Sana clarifies that by explaining that she can have sex, she just chooses not to. There is also the assumption that Sana isn’t interested in boys or that she can’t participate in russefeiring “because she’s not ‘allowed’ to drink alcohol.” We see it with her parents when she has to explain to her mom that not all aspects of Islam fit her, and with her brother when she references him discouraging her from wearing a hijab in order to fit in more and avoid stigma. And finally, she explains during her season that she has experienced watching her brother being spit on, being asked racist questions, and other rude or hateful acts because she and her family are Muslim. 

The struggle to be both Norwegian and Muslim turns into a competition she gets lost in, and she ends up doing some very non-Muslim things like bully the Pepsi Max squad and lie in order to procure a russ bus. She also develops feelings for former Muslim and current atheist Yusef, which opens up an internal debate about the “Muslims only marry Muslims” rule.  

With all of her bitchiness, her prickliness, her rudeness and her mistakes, I still absolutely adore Sana. She is strong, outspoken, and takes absolutely no shit from anyone. Her story is so incredibly relevant to the world as a whole because of the way a lot of people view Islam or other “restrictive” aspects/sects of Christianity or other religions. It is a reminder that ultimately we should strive to love and understand each other, whether you are a theist or an atheist, a Muslim or a Norwegian. All is love. 

Everything I Love:

The opening scene with the contrast between Sana’s view from the bus with terrorist attacks and None of Dem by Robyn & Royksopp is so fun, & the look Sana gives the woman giving her a look over on the bus is pure Sana perfection 

The scene when Elias called Sana a slave woman and all of his friends gave him a verbal beatdown 

When we heard that Eskild was redecorating Noora’s room without her permission 

The Hot in Here scene with all the Balloon Squad working out while the girl squad ogles them, and the way Sana visibly snaps herself out of her trance. Also the shot of them coming up the street with a bunch of balloons to meet the girls is iconic

The way Yousef comes over to talk to Sana while she is over in the corner being a grump on the bus - I knew there was a reason she and Isak became friends. They’re both grumpy pants. 

When Sana catches Yousef dancing in her living room

The happy little look on her face when Yousef sends her a friend request on Facebook. She always smiles so freaking bright when she’s having fun with him

When Yousef showed off his carrot peeling skills

The way the Pepsi Max squad always has Pepsi 

When Yousef took the rap for the vodka left out at Sana’s party, then Sana was hit with a metaphorical brick when Yousef told her he isn’t Muslim. You could see the shock on her face, and now she is conflicted because “Muslims only marry Muslims” and she clearly has already developed feelings for Yousef

When Sana and Noora drink coffee and bask in their solidarity that Vilde and Magnus are gross

When Sana and Yousef play basketball together and we see her smile - we have NEVER seen her smile like that. And then they have a heart to heart about their individual religious beliefs and it is PURE GOLD

“I just feel like Islam, or religion in general, creates a lot of anxiety in people . . . I personally feel like I’ve taken the best out of the religion and thrown away the rest. It’s like, compassion towards others, being grateful for what’s best, having compassion. That’s it. Don’t you think I can remember to be a good person without praying?” - Yousef

“For me, everything can be total chaos during the day, but the moment I start to pray, everything turns quiet and clear. Because even though there’s all this chaos, you’ll remember what really matters. It’s fine because everything has a bigger context and a meaning. Because every little part of the universe is so complex. Imagine that! Even the brain of a cockroach has greater meaning on earth. I just can’t believe all of that is a coincidence,” - Sana

Her chat with Elias was also fantastic

“What’s more important, saying you believe in Allah or behaving as though you believe in Allah?” - Elias

Watching everyone join in during “Imagine” definitely almost had me tearing up - another song added to my playlist. Honestly this scene was so sweet and touching and then everything just came crashing down. It was intense. And Sana’s face just looked freaking broken. Then when she overheard that her suspicions about being pushed out of the group because she’s Muslim were correct it was like an extra stab through the heart

The scene where she’s walking through the schoolyard was excellent - very reminiscent of Isak’s similar scene, and another way in which the two of them parallel one another 

And this line is so, so true from Sana to Isak regarding why she never told Isak she knew Even before he met Isak

“I think Even should get to choose for himself how much he wants to share about his past. I mean, you might not want to share every thing about your past.”

When Sana and Jamilla have the conversation about all the different ways people fast, and Jamilla references her friend who won’t even swallow her own spit. So this friend goes around spitting all the time while she’s fasting. “She’s really confident about it, too.” 

Both Sana’s expression of how she thinks the world views her and Isak’s response are very powerful

Sana: “Do you know what people think when they see me, when they see my hijab, which is the first thing they see? They think I’m wearing it because I’m forced to, not because I want to. And if I say it’s because I want to, then I’m just oppressed because I can’t have my own opinion. We talk about freedom of religion and all kinds of freedoms here in Norway, but being allowed to wear an extra piece of clothing, that’s wrong? Do you know what people do when they see Elias and I walking down the street? They spit at him because they think he’s oppressing me! He doesn’t even want me to wear the hijab because he doesn’t want me to get hate. Do you know how fucking tiring it is to walk out the door everyday knowing it’s yet another day where you have to prove to a whole country that you’re not oppressed . . . I’ve received so many dumb, racist questions in my life.”

Isak: “The dumb questions are so fucking important. People can’t stop asking the dumb questions because when they stop asking the dumb questions they start making up their own answers. And that’s dangerous. You just have to stop looking for racism in dumb questions. Even if they feel racist, it’s so fucking important to answer them.”

The Los Losers bus definitely had me tearing up

When Linn admitted to sending a used tampon to someone who flirted with the boy she liked 

When we see Eskild picking up his guru mantle once more and he compares The Bible to Beyoncé . . . “The Bible says ‘The greatest of these is love’ or as Beyoncé would say ‘Love on top,’” while giving Sana advice

Noora’s face both when she saw William getting out of his car and when she got out of his after a four day sex and talk marathon

The conversation between Sana and her mom about why it is important for her to eventually marry someone who understands her beliefs and reminds her of them, not because she should be Muslim but because she chooses to be Muslim and she “would be very lonely if she were the only one in the relationship who believes.” So, whether or not she marries a nonbeliever or a non-Muslim is Sana’s choice, but there would be essential parts of Sana’s own wellbeing that would effected if she chose to go that route because her faith is an essential part of who she is. 

The conversation with Noora was equally important. They may not necessarily be fated to be together, but there is a reason this person (Yousef) came into Sana’s life and avoiding him would be ignoring this sign from fate that this person is supposed to be a part of her life right now. Life is now. 

When Yousef and Sana have yet another philosophical/religious discussion and Yousef proposes: “Maybe that’s why society needs religion. Democracy isn’t based on the idea that all people are different. It’s based on the idea that all people have equal worth. And that idea doesn’t exactly come from science. But I don’t think it helps to pretend there aren’t prejudices. What you have to do instead is show what Islam is.” 

And The Finale!!!

When Vilde was putting on her makeup and listening to Pretty Hurts by Beyoncé, and everything else about her segment. I loved getting that glimpse into some of her life and mind for a little while. I’m still disappointed she never got to tell us her story during the original SKAM.

When Eva reminds Chris that he’s a fuckboy so they can never be together. Sure he’s momentarily disappointed and probably felt sad for a little bit, but he was really quick to move on to Emma - proving Eva was smarter than him and knew him better than he knew himself. Seriously though the scene where Penetrator Chris and Emma first see each other is fucking awesome

I LOVE LOVE LOVE that the school nurse has a big white dildo on the desk next to her while she has her chat with Chris

When we see Even stressing over making Isak’s birthday perfect 

The interaction between Eskild and Linn when Eskild tells Linn she has to wear a hijab to Sana’s party because Sana is Muslim was hilarious. And then he told her they are always going to be there for each other and it got me right in the feels

And then when Eskild was proposing he, Noor, and Linn could share everything together if William moved in . . . shampoo, and William, and dish soap . . . 

Then Vilde to Chris; “You know why you’re my best friend? Because no matter how hard my day is, you always find a way to make me laugh. Sometimes it makes you feel better to pretend that you’re fine.” 

And the final speech!!!!

“Dear Sana, This speech is for you. And you’re getting it because what you’re inviting us to today overthrows American presidents tomorrow. We live in a chaotic world where it is difficult to understand the rules. Because why are some people poor and other people rich? Why do some people have to be refugees while others are safe? And why is it that sometimes even though you try to do something good it’s still met with hate?

It’s not weird that people give up, that they stop believing the good. But thank you so much for not giving up, Sana. Because even though it sometimes feels like it no one is ever alone. Each and everyone of us is part of the big chaos. And what you do today has an effect tomorrow.

it can be hard to say exactly what kind of effect, and usually you can’t see how everything fits together. But the effects of your actions are always there, somewhere in the chaos. In 100 years we may have machines that can predict effects of every action but until then we can trust this: Fear spreads But… But, fortunately love does too.”

I’m going to go cry now. 

[travllingbunny]

The 100: 7x02 The Garden

I love this episode. Mostly for the beautiful and emotionally complex Octavia-centric flashback story, for all the exciting revelations about the nature of the Anomaly and time dilation and the overall story of this season (all the exposition was done in a surprisingly natural way and never bothered me), and the way the two timelines were interwoven. It says a lot that I wasn’t even bothered by the lack of Clarke or Bellamy  - or the fact that this episode featured only 6 characters (plus some extras in suits), one of which was a deranged minor character we’ve never seen before. Episodes focused on a small number of characters and plots often feel more coherent. 

Comparisons between The Garden and Eden are obvious, the two even have basically the same title, and many similarities and contrasts, so I rewatched Eden yesterday, and I’ll be writing a post about that episode soon, too. I rewatched the entire show just before season 7 started, but season 5 is the only one I’ve never written reviews of, so this seems like the right occasion. it will also be interesting to rewatch Red Queen after this.

One of the things that I noticed rewatching season 5 is how well the cinematography has been used in seasons 5, 6 and 7 and how it differentiates different worlds. The ruined Earth in season 5 was mostly in sepia, yellow and grey tones, looking like a gloomy desert - except for Eden, which had normal colors. Sanctum has bright colors - it’s beautiful, but a little too colorful, almost psychedelic, dangerous. Skyring in this episode mostly seen in soft light and blueish-green colors - a peaceful paradise. 

Or is that a prison? A solitary/house arrest? I love this duality - it can be both. The most beautiful place can be a prison that drives you insane, if you’re all alone.

One garden, two serpents

Isolation is a theme we’ve seen on The 100 with many characters: Clarke was in a solitary for a year, distracting herself with drawings, then alone roaming around for 3 months, then forced to spend 6 years on a deserted planet, but she was only completely alone for the first 2 months, when she was fighting with nature and lack of food and water as much as with loneliness, and she was talking to Bellamy every day - who couldn’t even hear her - and hoping to see him again. Murphy was alone for 3 months in a fully stacked bunker on Becca’s island, but comfort is no help when you’re all alone, only have one and the same videos to watch and music to listen to, and you don’t know if you’re getting out. Octavia was the Girl Under the Floor for 16 years, and she had her mother and brother, but no one else; then she was locked up for a year; and after all the fighting, including the 6 years in the bunker with 1200 people she ruled over (which was maybe the time when she was more lonely than ever!), she ended up spending 10 years of her life on a planet with a family of two people - again - and no one else, and - just as when she was a child - with little hope that she will ever have a chance to meet anyone else. And here we see the effects of a  prolonged isolation from everyone else, with poor Orlando (that’s what he’s called in the end credits), the prisoner who dug out dead bodies and used a creepy doll just to have an illusion of friends. 

Unlike Clarke in 5x01, Octavia did not have to struggle with loneliness or fight to survive, but the paradise in which she had accidentally ended up in was also a prison of sorts, since she could not get out of it and was likely to spend all her life there, without ever seeing her brother or any other people, except for Diyoza and Hope. Like Clarke, Octavia found a family, and a child to take care of, but unlike Clarke, Octavia did not become a little girl’s adoptive or substitute mother.

The title evokes Diyoza’s line from 5x13: “One garden, two serpents. Eden never stood a chance.” Instead, they got to have their paradise here, until Octavia’s attempt to send her brother a message brought the Disciples from Bardo there to capture them. I’m not sure if that was a bad or a good thing - since that was probably their only way out of Skyring. 

(There’s also a literal garden in the episode, and  this was the first time we saw Octavia farm the land since 4x09, when she learned how to do it on Ilian’s farm. That was the last time Octavia tried to escape her darkness by having an idyllic farm life and a relationship, at least for a few days before the end of the world comes, but her past came back in the form of those people who recognized and attacked her - and she realized she wasn’t cut out for peace and rode into Polis looking for a war. She wasn’t ready at the time to give up violence. In season 5, she insisted that “Farmers won’t save the world, warriors will” - which Monty proved wrong. And now, Octavia has become a farmer.)

But Octavia’s paradise was forced on her, and it was clear that she and Diyoza didn’t really feel the same about living the rest of their lives on Skyring. The difference is, Diyoza doesn’t have anyone else in the world she cares about - everyone she once cared about has been dead for centuries. and she has given up on trying to change the world. She obviously wanted to do it once, when she was fighting “the fascist government who tried to take my home” and blowing up buildings, but she’s now tired of the violence, after being a terrorist/rebel, then a prisoner of a big corporation, again a rebel fighting against that corporation to save prisoners from being left to die just because they were deemed expendable, then she led another war - which ended with her baby-daddy destroying the Earth, and now she’s tired of the violence and wants to have a different life in peace with her daughter, who she didn’t even want to teach fighting of any kind. She’s also content to live without ever reuniting with the rest of the human race. Maybe partly because she was quite hurt to learn that she was supposedly in history books as one of the worst people ever. (Which she really shouldn’t have taken seriously - since it was Russell who said it, so these “history books” can only be Sanctum history books, written by Russell or his family members or other Primes. They left Earth around the time when Diyoza was just arrested, so it’s unlikely they even knew what history books said about her in the next few years - and even if those history books said so, they would be history books written under the same government Diyoza was fighting against.)

Octavia, on the other hand, still has other people she cares about in the world, most of all her brother. Not only did she leave a time when she knew Bellamy and others are likely to be in danger from the Primes - and she had no way of knowing they had learned the truth about the Primes by themselves - but they parted on bad terms and with unresolved issues and with no catharsis, and Bellamy would probably be left thinking she really died when he left her on Alpha - instead of learning that she did resolve her issues and find peace.  She didn’t know that her attempts to get back the way she came, through the lake, would never work - if she had succeeded, she would have probably ended up on Bardo instead. Ironically, only when she made peace with the fact she couldn’t go back and sent a letter in a bottle, it ended up alerting the Disciples - but it all eventually resulted in Octavia ending up back on Sanctum in the same place she left (whether she escaped and came back from Bardo or through some other planet?), and got the chance to tell Bellamy in person that she understands him now. 

There’s some ambiguity about Octavia’s relationships with Diyoza and Hope - at times it seems that Octavia is Hope’s co-parent: she lives with them and is closely involved in raising Hope, after all - not exactly like an aunt who just occasionally visits and plays with the kid. All three of them are shown as a close family unit. However, Octavia does not see herself as Hope’s mother - nor does Hope see her that way. She is “Aunty O”. Hope has a mother, and not an absent or inattentive one, but someone like Diyoza, fully focused on raising her daughter. Octavia and Diyoza may be seen as sisters - with “Aunty O” and Octavia telling Bellamy in the letter that she loves her like she loves him even though she’s a ‘pain in the ass’. Or they could look like “an old married couple”, as Diyoza called them back in season 6 when they were finishing each other sentences.

(But if we’re supposed to think that Octavia’s and Diyoza’s close relationship never got sexual in any way, in spite of the fact they lived together for 10 years without any other adults around and with almost no hope they would ever see another adult, then I guess one or both of them is really extremely heterosexual, real 0 on Kinsey’s scale. If we’re supposed to think that. Technically, we don’t know for sure.)

Anyway, this ambiguity of whether Octavia was a co-parent to Hope or not has caused some debate on Twitter about what degree of responsibility Octavia exactly had towards Hope and whether she was allowed to leave her. But even if Octavia is seen as a co-parent, I don’t subscribe to the idea that every adult, especially a woman, who comes into the situation of taking care of a child must immediately forget about all other relationships, concerns and desire and subjugate their entire life to taking care of that child. Especially when it also means that the child will be isolated from the world at large. I didn’t think it was healthy when Bellamy’s whole life revolved around protecting Octavia, either, or when Clarke, after escaping Polis in season 5, thought for a moment that her and Madi living all alone, as they did during those 6 years, would be an OK future for either of them.

Octavia may not have thought the whole time dilation through (yes, it’s quite likely Hope would be old or die before she returned from Sanctum with the other people, since she’d need time to find Bellamy and others, explain things to them and back them go back, but she still had hope (no pun intended) that both she and Hope could have more of life than and was still fighting to make contact with her people on the other side. Diyoza may have been right about the time dilation, but how did she imagine Hope’s life was going to be in the future? Yes, if Octavia left, Hope would end up alone after Diyoza died. But if Octavia stayed, Hope would still be left all alone after Diyoza and Octavia died, and never got a chance to meet anyone else, have any other kind of life, be a part of the human race.

One may argue Diyoza was being selfish, trying to keep Octavia there, and she certainly did take away Octavia’s choice and forced her to stay. Though, in her defense, she thought she was saving her life - but it was still was one of those “I’m making choices for you because I know what’s best for you”. And it wasn’t her whole motivation - it was mostly about wanting to keep Octavia there as a part of their family unit. Octavia called her out on the fact that it wasn’t all about Hope, it was about their relationship, too. Which certainly seemed emotionally intense, with Diyoza being hurt and sort of jealous at the thought that Octavia would leave her and Hope and that she may love her less than she loves her brother. 

The episode played a lot with the parallels between Octavia and Bellamy, with O using what she had learned from Bellamy to take care of young Hope the same way. And the parallel between Octavia and Hope as “Girls Under the Floor” were even more obvious, even before Hope literally had to go under the floor to hide from the Disciples. That would put Diyoza in Aurora’s role and Octavia in Bellamy’s. It’s not a perfect parallel, as Bellamy didn’t  have any other strong attachments to anyone or any other family while Aurora was alive. But, while Aurora seemed to have no other vision for the future except focusing fully on hiding Octavia, Bellamy tried to give his sister an opportunity to meet other people and live a life - by taking her to the dance - and Octavia was similarly the one who wished to bring other people to Skyring and was giving Hope the hope (!) she would meet them.   

The Three Stooges and the Anomaly

(Thanks @jeanie205​ for that moniker LOL) The one thing that brings down this episode (I’m taking away half the point from it) is the very unlikely degree of plot-induced incompetence that the trio of Hope, Echo and Gabriel displayed throughout this episode - so they could get stuck on Skyring, maybe for 5 years:

Hope knew the bridge was under the lake - she should have known the note could get washed up!

How come Hope didn’t know there was more than one door to the cabin? Or if Orlando built the other door, or someone else who was there while she was away, how come none of the trio noticed that other door?

Even the windows looked big enough for someone to come in. Why didn’t at least one of them stand guard in the cabin? Or at least somewhere close where they could see what’s happening in the cabin? Why were they both sitting somewhere outside? They weren’t even close to the door. Did they think Orlando could only come into the cabin from one direction?

Why didn’t Gabriel take the memory viewer with him when he ran out? Come on, dude, that’s one of the most important things you have there, and you know there is a deranged guy outside, and you just leave it there?

Still, I enjoyed this part of the story, too, especially with all the new info we got - which got me speculating the whole week - see my theories  here.

Gabriel is so adorable as an old man scientist in a young body and even the fact he is more interested in the Anomaly than in any living human is kind of endearing. We also got a glimpse of the nerdy young doctor who was once crushing on Becca before going to the mission and meeting Josephine.

Echo is finally starting to justify her main character billing this season, getting an actual storyline rather than tagging along around Bellamy, and she is already a much more enjoyable character. She hasn’t actually changed much yet - but she’s now put in the position as an audience surrogate, wondering what the heck is going and asking question like “Where is Bellamy?” while Hope and Gabriel spout exposition (they do it so well though that you don’t even mind it).  It helps a lot that she’s not around any of the Spacekru, so we don’t have to deal with the forced “we’re all close family due to the 6 years off-screen, which we spent in utter boredom and without any actual dangers we’d have to deal with” dynamic. Instead, now a character she’s interacting with (Hope) and Echo’s own hallucinations are constantly calling her out on her past actions, which helps fix the issue that season 5 created - the impression that Echo is the one character who doesn’t have to deal with the consequences of her past actions, with her past being simply waved away with “they spent 6 years with her and she’s now one of the good guys” (Although, while I like Hope calling Echo out, Hope got it wrong - Echo didn’t kick Octavia over the cliff after stabbing her, Octavia tripped and fell. But that’s not the first time in the show the writers Octavia has misremembered an event.)

This will be the second time Echo is stuck somewhere in a peaceful place with just a few people for 6 5 years. How much of this will be off-screen? It certainly helps that we’ve already seen her interact with Hope and Gabriel in two episodes, and the dynamic between Hope and Echo is developing, with Echo starting to comfort Hope when Hope showed vulnerability behind her fast-talking snarky exterior. 

Echo still doesn’t seem ready to “face her demons”, since her reaction to her own hallucination telling her she’s still just a killer and asking her who she is if she doesn’t have someone (Bellamy) to follow, was to ignore it and try to kill people and now swear she’ll kill everyone she needs to in order to get to Bellamy. But I assume this is just the beginning of her long overdue character development.

Was there significance to Echo plucking the flower and then looking at the sky? Was it simply her starting to appreciate the beauty of the planet? t It reminds me of how Clarke was  touching the flowers in Eden in 5x01.

Other observations:

Technically, I guess this episode was really Hope-centric, since she was the only character in both timelines. 

I’m not sure what exactly the scientific explanation is for Octavia’s arm healing the moment she got to Skyring. How does the whole temporal flare thing work? 

"What is it about Bellamy that makes otherwise sensible women willing to die for him?” - I see what they did there. I bet this is a hint about what the focus of a lot of this season is. Hope meant Echo and Octavia, but we know that Clarke’s storyline will also soon become about looking for Bellamy “her missing people”, “her family”, “people she loves”. On the other hand, I’m not sure how much it makes sense for Hope to ask that - she must have heard Octavia’s stories about Bellamy, so she’d know what it is about him that’s so special - his devotion to those he loves and how ready he is to do anything for them. But maybe Hope felt some of that same jealousy Diyoza did, or her mom’s jealousy rubbed off on her, because Octavia kept trying to get back to her brother.

It’s interesting that Octavia named “Bellamy, Clarke and Madi” as the main people she wanted to bring here. She didn’t mention Raven or Miller (as she would if she was talking about the Delinquents as a family going back to season 1, or even her mentor Indra, or friend Niylah. Just Bellamy and Clarke and Madi - as a part of her family she wants to bring. There’s no reason why she’d see Madi as her family but not Indra, so this definitely seems like Clarke and Madi are seen as Bellamy’s family and a package deal in Octavia’s eyes. (And that’s before she even witnessed what happened in 6x10.) Not that surprising considering Octavia’s “another traitor who you love” comment from 5x08 and her dislike of Echo. Ironically, almost killed all three of them as Blodreina, which is maybe also a sign of how much she’s disconnecting from that role - even though she hasn’t gone through her 6x09 Face Your Demons hallucination yet.

It turns out Octavia was older than Bellamy in 6x09-6x13. The green box was probably her peaceful life on Skyring that she did not remember. But the red box was the unfinished business with her past. It seems that she was changed psychologically by her time on Skyring even without remembering it.

Hope is now the third child raised on stories about the Delinquents. Little Hope liked Murphy, just like Jordan did  during his “rebellious phase”. Madi, however, was an Octavia fan.

I guess Orlando saw Hope’s name written on the door, since it doesn’t seem they ever met before. But where did the creepy doll come from? 

If prisoners all end up insane as he did - and they probably do, after such long periods of complete isolation - that’s a really messed up way of making people into “true believers”, by breaking them completely. A solitary confinement that’s years long? Cruel.

The Bardo symbol (Phoenix) was seen in the bucket and bottle Octavia was using, which proves that the Bardo people had already been on the planet before Octavia and Diyoza ended up on it.

If Orlando had no one else to dig out, I guess they always make sure to bring the prisoners back after they’ve served their sentence. But they probably killed Dev.  I hope we get the story about Dev and Hope in flashbacks. Seeing what his facial expression was at the time of death, that guy certainly didn’t die a natural death.

The Becca cameo was cool, and this was a whole new face of Becca, kind of cheeky and funny. But her comment that time dilation is “sexy as hell”... um, OK, Yeah, how lucky you get to “get to the future faster” and possibly die before getting a chance to ever reunite with anyone else you know? To be fair, she did not expect all the others in the mission to die and leave poor Colin on his own.

Gabriel “had to be sure she (Josephine) was really gone”. But maybe a part of him deep inside hoped she wasn’t..

So the Anomaly was already there when Colin Benson crashed on the planet. Hmm... that seems to go against my theory that the Anomaly Stones were made by humans at some point during the previous 230 years, but I’m still not giving up on it. Eligius 3 must have travelled longer to Skyring, if it is so far away from Earth and Sanctum,  I don’t think that “Beta” meant that Skyring was the second stop of Eligius 3 - maybe the planets were graded by how good conditions they had for human life. Which would put Sanctum and Skyring at the top, but Sanctum was closer. And with all sorts of time shenanigans going around, maybe there’s some way that the Anomaly Stones could have been placed there by humans. I just can’t believe that it was really some alien race millions of years ago, especially with the Anomaly symbols looking like Greek letters, many of those used in physics or math,  the gender symbols, and the infinity symbol is there, too. 

This was one of the rare episodes of The 100 where no one died. Though we did learn about some people’s past deaths.

Rating: 9/10

[zekroudon]

Passing the Baton

Coming back from work, Adrien never expected to find something from his past on his desk.  Raising and caring for your children is never easy, but sometimes, he wishes he could do more.

Discussion between a loving father and his son. You can read it on Ao3 here!

Stopping in front of the door to my home, I fiddle with the keys before unlocking the door and entering. As I close the door behind me, light rain starts to pour, as if the sky was crying. A heavy silence greets me. Growing up in a cold mansion, I’m used to cold emotionless silence, but in a house that was once filled with laughs, screams, and joy, it’s overwhelmingly out of place. I can’t say the lack of warmth pleases me, which has grown usual since everything that happened…

 I spot some camembert wrappings on the counter, probably left there by Plagg without Hugo noticing. I chuckle as I pick them up and throw them in the trash, remembering my teenage years living with the cheese-eating kwami. So much has changed since then. I notice the absence of Emma’s shoes and Louis’ sports bag, meaning they must still be out, probably with their friends, or Ethan in Emma’s case.

 As I walk past my wife’s office, the absence of humming and buzzing from the different sewing machines hits me like Stoneheart's fist. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Everything will be alright, everyone is safe. I turn around and enter my room.

 I drop my shoulder bag next to my chair. I sigh noticing the piles of papers I have yet to mark. I’ll have to work on some of them tonight if I want to give them back by the end of the week. The joys of being a teacher... I open the curtains to let the remaining light in my office. The grey clouds taunt me as if they know something I don’t. Something sparkles on my desk and catches my eye.

 A black ring with a cat paw symbol on top.

 What is it doing on my desk? Is it really the miraculous, or just another one of Plagg’s pranks? It should be with Hugo now, he’s been Chat Noir for nearly three weeks now…

 I slide it on my finger and it turns a silver-grey. My stomach sinks as the flash of green light fades, leaving the black kwami before me. All the blood is drained from my face, turning my skin as white as a sheet of paper. Not that I didn’t miss Plagg, and I’m glad he didn’t fall in the hands of an ill-intended person once again, but      why is he not with my son?  

 “Plagg? Why… Where’s Hugo? Is he alright?” I turn around and dive to my drawer, taking the Miracle box and opening it. Other than the ladybug, cat, dragon, snake, and butterfly, they all seem to be in their spot.

 “Meh, people were talking behind his back at school, some stupid journalists harassed him once again, he said he wasn’t worthy of my miraculous and that’s the last thing I remember before he slid the ring off.” He shrugs it off, but being my kwami for so long, I can see in his eyes that he’s worried.

     Oh    ... Those stupid journalists are trying to throw me and my wife into the mud by targeting our son. I’m disgusted at how they used the recent events knowing we wouldn’t notice their idiotic articles and pandering. It’s not the first time it happened, but Hugo has always been the most sensitive of the three. Louis thrives in their attention and Emma ignores them, but their baby brother would rather be left alone.

 Someone knocks on my door frame, bringing me back to Earth. I turn and see bright blue eyes filled with worry looking at me accompanied by a sad smile. Her black hair cascades past her shoulders, her mother’s spitting image. She steps forward to hug me, but she stops in her tracks when she notices the black Kwami hovering next to my shoulder.

 “He heard, didn’t he?” She asks Plagg, continuing once he nodded. “Louis called them out, and I felt that Hugo was hurt, Nooroo did too, but I didn’t think he’d relinquish you…”

 “He did, and now we should go and find him.” Says the Kwami.

 “He’s not in his bedroom, do you have any idea of where he could be?” She asks me.

 I’m startled by her certainty of it before noticing the small brooch in her hair. Right, I gave her the Butterfly Miraculous since she can’t be Ladybug any more. How could I forget that? She lays her hand on my forearm, trying to reassure me.

 “He’s going to be okay, he’s strong.”

 “I’ll go look outside, stay here and wait to see if he comes back. Try and call him.” I look at Plagg before adding “Like old times?”

 “Can I have some cam....”

 “Plagg, claws out!”

 A small smile stretches my lips at his antics while the magic costume appears on my body. The rush of energy is even stronger than what I remembered. The black fabric covers my body in the same design I wore a few years ago. The two ears stand on top of my head and the belt tail swooshes worriedly behind my back.

 I give my daughter the salute that was once so characteristic to me before opening my window and jumping outside under the cold autumn rain.

 I shiver as the freezing water flattens my hair and runs on my body. The cat part in me hates rain, even though it was raining the day I met Marinette and it grew to have a romantic significance for us. Using my baton, I raise myself over the buildings to scan the city from above. If Hugo is out in this weather, he’ll get sick in no time...

 The grey sky is barely distinguishable from the rooftops, the color has faded from everything. Cars still roam the streets, but most passersby have gotten cover. On the dimmed bright side, I’m more likely to go unnoticed as Hugo’s suit is quite different than mine and word of Chat Noir’s reappearance would spread like wildfire in Paris.

 I stop on top of the bakery, hoping to channel a bit of my wife’s good luck and extend my weapon once again. I make sure to be as silent as possible, there is no need to bother her with this right now.

 I’m a good father, I should be able to handle this myself, right?

 Anyway, it isn’t like I could ask her for help right now, I don’t know if she has remembered me yet…

 In the nearby park, the statue that was erected for us so many years ago, in our beginnings as Paris’ heroes, still stands strong against the wind and rain. Things were simpler then, yet I wouldn’t change anything that happened. I have three amazing kids, a loving wife, and a life I enjoy plenty.

 Something moves behind the statue, only noticeable with my enhanced sight. It looks like a mop of dark hair. A flicker lights up in my chest, it must be him…

 I land far enough to not startle the person, but they keep their head down, either ignoring me or hasn’t heard me. As I walk closer, I recognize Hugo with his usual Chat Noir t-shirt and hoodie. He took the saying hiding in plain sight very seriously, though he has always been one of my biggest fans. Hunched on himself like this, he looks as small as he was years ago when I cradled him in my arms as opposed to the strong young man he grew into, just like his grandfather, well, not      him    , obviously.

 I sit next to him, ignoring the squelching sound of the soaked ground under me. I snake my arm around his shoulders and he leans into me.

 We stay silent for a bit, the droning sound of the rain deafens, my ears focussing on my son’s breathing and sporadic sobs. I would like so much to give him a shell, which is ironic since he used the turtle previously, to protect him behind him and fight people who hurt him, but I can’t.

 I can’t overprotect him, I wouldn’t do him any favors. Some would say that he has to learn to grow a thicker skin, but I hate that. He was born into celebrity because of me, because of his mother. The last in a line of models and heroes. Grandson of amazing bakers, but also the biggest terrorist Paris has ever known. His brother and sister thrived in the spotlight, but he never liked it. Huge shadows cast by us and enormous shoes to fill for him.

 “I love you.”

 It doesn’t feel enough. It doesn’t feel strong enough for everything to convey to him, but I don’t really know what else to say. I want him to talk to me, to help me understand so I can help him feel better in return, but I can’t force him to. It has to be his choice, his decision. I tighten my hold on him and I lean my head on his.

 “Do you want to talk about what happened? I’m here for you if you want.”

 Here, I stretched him a pole, or a baton in our case, I just have to hope he takes it. He seems to calm down a bit, his breathing returning to something more regular.

 “I don’t know… I’m just tired, mad, I don’t know… It feels like everyone is against me, that the world is mocking me and punishing me for not doing my job and failed at protecting mom against Lady Papillon’s akuma… Because of me she had to give up guardianship and all her memories…”

 “It’s not your fault, just like it wasn’t mine or Emma’s… It’s Lila’s. She kept akumatizing people, she manipulated Ethan to akumatize him under her control, she tricked all of us. You didn’t do any of that. If anything, you saved the day. You protected the Ladybug and got back the Cat miraculous with Louis! You even dual-wielded before your siblings. To be honest, I was a mess having to fight your mother and seeing her lose all her memories as she said the incantation…”

 “But why make me Chat Noir? Wasn’t I better as Jade Turtle? Why give the grandson of Hawkmoth the Cat Miraculous? The press would go wild and…”

 “Then why give his son the miraculous? Was it a bad decision? What about your sister, did we make a bad decision making her Ladybug?”

 “Of course not! You were the best Chat Noir ever and Mom couldn’t have defeated Hawkmoth and Mayura without you! And even though Emma’s time was cut short, she was an amazing Ladybug too, just like Mom.” He looks at me with horrified eyes, offended that I would say such a thing.

 “So then, why would making you Chat Noir be a bad idea? You are kind, compassionate, caring, incredibly smart. You use Cata… um, your power in ways I would never have thought of. I wouldn’t have trusted anyone else with taking care of Plagg, you know how he is…”

 “Yeah, different in so many      ways    .”

 I chuckle at his pun, a true Chat Noir.

 “See, you even make great puns, that’s a sign of a great black cat!”

 Even though I don’t see him, I feel him rolling his eyes just like his mother.

 “So tell me, why do you think you are not suited to wield this ameowzing miraculous?”

 “People… the journalists, they keep saying that I’m becoming like      him    , that I’m a social recluse, that never goes to events and that I’m rude to people. And… I’m not...thin enough…”

 The last part is barely audible, less than a whisper. If it weren’t for my feline auditory senses, I wouldn’t have heard.

 But thin enough? I know he’s more on the bulky side, having inherited Tom’s stature and my height, but he’s not fat or overweight…

 “And I don’t love Coccinelle like you love Mom or Emma likes Ethan, even when you were in your ‘just a friend’ phase… I like her, sure, but only as a friend… Since I’m Chat Noir, shouldn’t I be in love with her? Didn’t you and Mom say that Ladybug and Chat Noir are always made for each other?”

 “Okay, slow down, one thing at a time. You need your space, there’s nothing wrong about it. You are more introverted and it’s okay. I don’t even remember any event you have missed, so they’re probably making stuff up for clicks and views.”

 I turn to him and place my palm on his soaked shirt, near his heart.

 “But, this right here, as long as it beats, you won’t become like him. You have so much love to give others, anyone on it’s receiving end knows how much you care and love, how lucky they are. Maybe you don’t show it in big gestures as I do, but in smaller ones and by being there for others. Gabriel never did. He was cold, distant, heartless, and cruel. To him, everyone was a pawn, a chess piece meant to be sacrificed if it meant he reached his goal. You two are absolutely nothing alike.”

 He looks at me with big green eyes, still red from crying, but for a second, it’s like I was looking at my four-year-old when he found a shiny stone for Plagg, his “imaginary” friend. Full of hope and kindness.

 “And I don’t know who said that you are ugly, but it’s also a lie.”

 “Well, only me… and maybe some of my classmates, I don’t know… They mocked me for not being a model like Emma and Louis, that it was probably because I’m too ugly to be a model… I guess it must have gotten inside my head...”

 “Mom offered it to you a few times and you always refused, we wouldn’t have forced you to do something you don’t like. And beauty doesn’t come from outside, but from what’s inside, and you’re shiningly beautiful. Many of the models I’ve worked with back then and now may look “good”, with six-packs and all, but they are mean and cold. Anyway, most of what companies sell us is fake, models are starving to be so cut, you don’t want to do that. Mari’s company is one of the only ones where models don’t need to starve themselves and she has lines for everyone.”

 I pause to breathe and think about what to answer to his last question. I always knew me and Marinette were meant to be, even if we had our moments of doubts, and I never questioned it. Emma and Ethan seem to love each other, even though I thought she would hate him for what happened. It shows how compassionate she is and understanding.

 “I don’t think that you are a bad Chat Noir for not loving Coccinelle. Feelings do change over time, and maybe later you’ll have those feelings for her, or never. Don’t base your worth as Chat Noir around whether or not you love her. Maybe you’ll be the first Chat Noir in history to not love his Ladybug, but it doesn’t mean that it is a bad thing.”

 “But, how do you know that you love someone? LIke that kind of love?”

 “I guess that they always brighten any room they’re in, you feel good when you are with them and make you want to spend more time with them. Your eyes are always following them and your body is drawn to them in surprising ways. You want to kiss them, hug, cuddle, which you can totally do with friends too! Well, maybe not the kissing part… Even though it's different for everyone, when it will happen, you’ll know. You will feel it in your heart. When I met your mom, I was amazed by how strong, and amazing she was. Mere seconds prior, she was unsure of herself and scared, but she faced Hawkmoth and talked back, assuring the city that we would protect them. I also fell in love with the girl whom I apologized to and gave her an umbrella under the rain. She made me laugh and smile in a way I hadn’t for a long time, it was like thunder had struck. For me, that was love, for you, it might be different, but it’s okay. Love is scary, it’s like jumping into the unknown and you can’t prepare enough for it, other than trusting and believing in yourself... Does anyone make you feel that way?”

 Maybe he’ll have the same bad luck, or good luck, to fall for his civilian partner as I did, but it would be unlikely since they never met before.

 “I think so…”

 To my chagrin, he’s closing himself again. But it’s okay, I’ll love him no matter what. I tighten my hold on his shoulders in a way I hope is reassuring.

 It seems to work a little, so I try to nudge him a bit farther.

 “Even if you don’t, it’s okay. Aromantic people still find happiness in life, romantic love is not necessary to be happy and have a fulfilling life, it’s not the only kind of love. I’m not well versed in the matter, but I did some research after I heard some students talking about it.”

 I must have said the right thing because he brightens a little and continues.

 “ I do feel what you described, sometimes, but it wasn’t… with a girl.”

 I feel him flinch against me and distance himself as if I was about to shout at him, disown him or something. It hurts a bit, but I’m more thankful and honored that he told me. I can’t imagine how scary it is to tell someone something like that.

 I snake my other arm around him and pull him for a tight hug. His cold wet clothes stick to his skin and my costume, but I feel him warming up against me.

 “Let’s go somewhere safe from the rain, you’re freezing.” I tell him softly.

 He nods and I take him on my back like we used to do when he was little and clad in his tiny kitty costume. Some people brought their restless kids on car rides, we took them to the Parisian rooftops as superheroes. It worked like a charm every time. He grew up a lot since then, they all did. They are becoming young adults ready to face the world together.

 Thankful for my enhanced strength, I make sure that Hugo is holding on tightly before leaping off with my baton.

 --------------------------------------------

 While he dried up, I went to a nearby coffee shop to get us something warm. It was one of our favorites when we were young and in collège. We used to go there often as friends, or on dates.

 it was still as cozy and welcoming as I remembered, though I had to detransform to not alarm everyone with Chat Noir’s very temporary return. Anyway, my goal wasn’t to stay for long anyway, only to order a cup of coffee and hot cocoa.

 I rejoin him on one of Notre-Dame’s towers. He’s wistfully looking at the Seine as if someone or something was calling him.

 I spot The Liberty 2, now Luka’s home, it’s windows lit up with warm and inviting lights. Turning to my son, I realize that he’s been looking at the boat all along.

 “So, that person that you like, how are they like?”

 “I… Um… He’s kind, grounding even. He’s always there to listen when I’m too far gone in my worrying or that I’m panicking. I know I can just go to him and he’ll play something for me... In a weird way, it’s as if spending time with him recharges my battery, you know?”

 “I know the feeling, I used to feel the same every time I went to the bakery to eat croissants because I had a particularly rough day or I spent an afternoon playing videogames with Nino.”

 “I’m afraid of telling him how I feel, what if it ruins things between us, what if he doesn’t want to talk to me ever again because of it? What if he’s homophobic, what if…”

 “Do you really think he could be homophobic? If he’s half as awesome as you make him up to be, he’ll accept you just as you are. You’re amazing too, and if he doesn’t return your feelings, it’s not the end of the world, I know that there’s someone out there for you.”

 “Probably not, well, I doubt it. I fell asleep on him once… Don’t look at me like that, it was an accident! I was tired, and he was playing his guitar, and when I woke up, my head was on his chest and he was sleeping too. I was so embarrassed…”

 “Well, you didn’t spend four years calling the love of your life a very good friend, I think Nino still has nightmares about that. You can’t even imagine the number of plans Marinette made with Alya and the girls to try and get me to notice her or her to confess her feelings to me. You falling asleep on your crush is cute, even though you think it’s embarrassing.”

 A comfortable silence installs himself between us, only broken by the sound of rain hitting the stone. He leans his head on my shoulder and I hug him once again. I feel my chest rumble in a small content purr, glad to have my son safe with me.

 “You can still purr?” He asks, surprised.

 “Apparently, it is not something you lose easily after being Chat Noir for more than twenty years…”

 “It’s okay, I always liked when you purred, it meant that you were happy.”

 “And you deserve to purr too. This is for you, you more than deserve it.”

 I take the silver baton from my back and give it to him.

 “      Je te passe le flambeau, le baton.    It’s your turn to be Chat Noir, your version of the black cat. If ever you are doubting yourself, or unsure, know that I will always believe in you and love you. You might be the first Chat Noir to like a guy, but it only means one thing, that you were born to make history.”

 “I’ll do it. I’ll protect Paris and forge my own path. I’m sorry for scaring you, I should have talked to you before doing something stupid like this…“

 He pulls me in a hug, a soft embrace. Stepping back, happiness and warmth return to his features, as if the dark clouds that were filling his mind had been pierced by the rays of sunlight. Smiling, I call off my transformation and slide off the ring from my finger. I expected to feel more nostalgic about it, but I know I did my time with Plagg, I already moved on. Anyway, I know that he’ll never be far, and I’ll cherish my memories of my time as a hero as long as I can.

 I extend my hand to him, the miraculous resting in my palm.

 “Hugo Dupain-Cheng, this is the miraculous of the Black Cat, which grants the power of destruction. You will use it for the greater good.”

 “Of course, I’ll try and not be as catastrophic as the last one. Clawsome as I am, there’s no one better for the job.”

 He definitely is my son, there are no doubts about that.

 He smirks as he takes the ring and slides it on his finger. As Plagg reappears, Hugo grabs him and hugs him to his chest. I hear the kwami groan a bit before accepting his fate. A small purr reaches my ear, but I’ll say that it’s the stones and wood of the cathedral to keep his “strong and intimidating” character.

 “I’m so sorry Plagg, I won’t give you up again, I promise.”

 “Alright, alright, but I’m starving! I want Camembert, and some Pont L’Évêque too.”

 My face scrunches in revulsion, hit by memories of how bad that particular cheese smelt. Hugo seems to be aware of it, but he’s too happy to be back with his kwami to care much. It’s obvious he’s not the one doing the laundry and finding melted cheese in pockets and socks…

 He transforms, doing his own little choreography as the green energy covers his body. Black and green ears stand on top of his head, black belt tail swishing behind him. His two peridot feline eyes filled with joy staring at me.

 I climb on his back and it’s my turn to be carried around Paris.

 “See, I told you that you’re a great black cat, but now let’s head home, I'm getting hungry too.”