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iamquiantrelle · 2 days ago

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OFFSIDES (chapter 3) ────── iamquaintrelle

# pairings: aurelien tchouameni x black oc (☔️💕✨). # wc: 8.16k

# tags: @irishmanwhore @lettersofgold @sucredreamer @leighjadeclimbedmtkilimanjaro @jessnotwiththemess @judectrl @ayeshami @greyishbach @haartemis @goldenngt @solidbriii @sailurmewn @rainbowsparkelsunshine @lbchi @bbgkoo @mauvecherie-writes @ri6ht6ack @captainwithoutmakingitlove @masn-mount @itsleonaa @alika-4466 @mufasathatniggatho @livinglifethroughfanfic

# summary: nazanin "naz" williams and real madrid star aurélien tchouaméni's casual relationship takes an unexpected turn. after he temporarily ghosts her, leading to leaked photos and public drama, they must face their feelings for each other and try to make their 'situationship' into something concrete. masterlist

RealMadridTea: Anyone else find Tchouaméni's girl's old pics? Rutgers grad, Delta something... guess she's not just some random chick after all 👀

FootballWAGS: That American university photo of Naz is actually cute. She looks different now but still pretty! #RealMadridWAGs

tchouagoals: leave my boy's business alone fr... but since we're here, she got credentials unlike some other wags js 🤷🏾‍♀️

Naz stared at her phone, scrolling through the endless tweets. Her Instagram might be private, but these people were like detectives – finding her college graduation photos, shots from her Delta Sigma Theta days, even an old academic award ceremony picture. Someone had even dug up her senior thesis from Rutgers' digital library: "The Psychology of Black Americans: Mental Health in the Black Diaspora."

"You're doing it again," Kiki said from their kitchen doorway. "I thought Aurélien told you to stay off Twitter."

"He did." Naz locked her phone, but not before seeing another notification about someone sharing photos from her line's probate show. "But it's like watching a car crash."

Her roommate – soon to be ex-roommate – set a cup of ginger tea in front of her. "Girl, you've got bigger things to worry about. Like what you're taking to Madrid and what you're leaving behind."

The half-packed boxes scattered around their London flat were testament to that. Some labeled "Madrid" in Naz's neat handwriting, others marked "Storage" or "Donate." Two years of life in London being sorted into neat categories. Her Delta letters, should they go to storage or Madrid? Her collection of psychology books – which ones would she need for whatever job she found in Spain?

Her phone buzzed again. Aurélien: Ready for tonight?

Their first proper date. Because apparently that's what you do when you're already pregnant and planning to move countries – you go on first dates. Try to build something real while your world is literally in boxes.

As ready as I'll ever be, she typed back. Though Twitter found my sorority pictures so...

His response was immediate: You looked good in crimson. But seriously, stay off there. Let Simon handle it.

Simon wasn't handling anything though. The tweets kept coming, the speculation growing. Her line sisters had started a group chat about it – half concerned, half excited that one of their own was "dating up." Her old roommate from Rutgers sent screenshots of forum discussions about her. At least they hadn't found anything too embarrassing. Yet.

"Earth to Naz," Kiki waved a hand in front of her face. "You good? No more fainting spells?"

"I'm fine." Her hand found her stomach automatically. Still flat, but somehow everything felt different now. Heavier. More real. "Just... overwhelmed."

"Yeah well, moving countries while pregnant will do that." Kiki started sorting through another box, pulling out Naz's framed psychology license. "Still can't believe you're leaving me for Madrid."

"I'm not leaving you-"

"Girl, please. You're moving in with your fine-ass footballer baby daddy. I'd leave me for that too." She paused, holding up a photo of them from their first day in London. "But you better FaceTime me every day. And name the baby after me."

"What if it's a boy?"

"Keith is a perfectly good name."

Naz laughed, but it caught in her throat as another wave of nausea hit. Morning sickness was a lie – it lasted all damn day.

Her phone buzzed again: Maman wants to know what you're craving for dinner. She's cooking.

Because that was her life now – first dates with the father of her baby while his mother cooked and Twitter dissected her past. Somewhere between the sorority pictures and the morning sickness, between London and Madrid, between casual and complicated, this had become her new normal.

"You know what's wild?" Kiki said, sitting next to her. "Ten months ago you were just thirst-following footballers on Instagram. Now look at you."

"Yeah," Naz whispered, looking around at her boxed-up life. "Now look at me."

"You will be okay, Naz," Kiki said to her as she shot her a knowing look. "You and that baby."

"Hold up, let me record this for the girlies," Naz said, opening Instagram. She flipped her camera to show the chaos of boxes. "Day three of packing and I still can't figure out what goes where."

She added it to her Close Friends story – a carefully curated list that Destiny had been removed from weeks ago. The responses were immediate:

Girl you better pack that fine man's jersey first from her line sister Ashley.

Send me measurements to Kiki’s flat, I might move to London 👀 from her college roommate Gia.

"You're really okay with Aurélien covering the rent?" Naz asked Kiki for probably the tenth time that week. "Just until you find someone new or decide to move?"

"Girl, am I okay with a millionaire footballer paying my rent? Is that a real question?" Kiki tossed a throw pillow at her. "The real question is are YOU okay with quitting your job here?"

Naz thought about the resignation letter she'd submitted two days ago. Her supervisor had been understanding – too understanding, really. Had even suggested she take some of her regular clients remotely.

"I mean, I can still do sessions online while I figure out the Spanish job market." She picked up her license again. "Might need to get this transferred though."

"And what did lover boy say about all this?"

"He wants me to take my time. Says I should focus on settling in first, learning Spanish..." She rolled her eyes. "Being healthy."

"He's not wrong though." Kiki's voice went serious. "After that hospital scare-"

"I know, I know." Naz added another clip to her story, this one of Kiki dramatically hugging her Delta letters. "But I can't just... exist. I need to work."

"And you will. But maybe take a minute? Enjoy being pampered by your rich boyfriend?"

"He's not-" Naz stopped. What was Aurélien exactly? Baby daddy seemed too casual. Boyfriend felt too simple for what they were becoming.

"Speaking of which," Kiki nodded at her phone, "didn't he say something about dinner?"

Right. Their first proper date. Because apparently they were doing things backward – baby first, dating second.

She added one final clip to her story: "Last few weeks in London... ready for my next chapter I think ❤️"

"Corny ass," Kiki teased, but she was smiling. "Now please tell me you're not wearing that on your date."

Naz looked down at her oversized t-shirt and leggings. "I have time to change."

"Girl, your man is taking you on a real date. After everything? You better show up and show out."

"It's just dinner at his place-"

"With his mama cooking! Even better!" Kiki was already heading to Naz's room. "We're finding you something that says 'yes I'm carrying your baby but I'm still that bitch.'"

"Pretty sure Josette doesn't need that message," Naz laughed, but followed her anyway.

Her phone buzzed again: Maman's making that fish you liked last time. Says it's good for the baby.

Then: You okay? Need me to get you an earlier flight?

Always checking on her now. Always making sure she was okay. It should feel suffocating but somehow... didn't.

I'm good. Just packing and talking shit with Kiki.

Tell her she can stay by herself as long as she needs. No rush finding someone new.

Naz showed the message to Kiki, who whistled. "Girl, keep him. Not just for the baby. Keep him for life."

And maybe, Naz thought as she finally let Kiki drag her to the closet, that wasn't such a scary thought anymore.

*******************************************************

The Madrid sun hit different than London’s cloudy ass weather, Naz thought as Aurélien loaded her bags into his Urus. Maybe because this time it felt less like a weekend visit and more like coming home.

"Happy?" she asked, catching his grin as he started driving.

"You're here," he said simply. "Course I'm happy."

"I still have to go back next week. Pack up the rest, deal with the movers-"

"Yeah, but you're here now." His smile was infectious. "In Madrid. With me."

She rolled her eyes but couldn't help smiling too. "You're being extra."

"Can't help it." His right hand left the steering wheel, finding its way to her stomach. "How's our little midfielder?"

"Making me throw up on the plane. Business class was not impressed."

He rubbed gentle circles on her still-flat belly. "Maman found these ginger candies. Special order from some Asian market."

"Your mom needs to stop spoiling me."

"Never." He glanced at her. "Oh, by the way, I signed us up for Lamaze classes."

Naz nearly choked on air. "You what?"

"Lamaze. For the birth? The instructor speaks English-"

"Aurel, I'm barely three months-"

"Yeah but we need to be prepared. I've been reading these books-"

She couldn't help laughing. "Since when are you such a nerd about this?"

"Hey, I'm serious!" But he was grinning too. "We gotta learn the breathing techniques and stuff. I don't want to mess up when you're in labor."

The way he said it – like it was obvious he'd be there, like there was no question about them doing this together – made something warm bloom in her chest.

His expression turned more serious. "Speaking of preparation... have you told your mom yet?"

And just like that, the warm feeling vanished. "Not yet."

"Naz..."

"I know, I know. I'll get to it."

"All your friends know. Your sorority sisters, Kiki, Gia-"

"That's different."

"You're going to start showing soon. The whole world's gonna know before your own mother?"

She stared out the window at passing Madrid streets. "Maybe she'll see it on Twitter."

"Nazanin."

"Don't 'Nazanin' me. You don't know what she's like."

His hand squeezed gently where it still rested on her stomach. "No, I don't. But I know she needs to hear this from you, not the internet. Not when I do the baby cele as the official announcement."

"You’re going to do the cele?"

"Eventually. If I get a goal." He paused at a red light. "Which is why you need to tell her soon. Before she finds out some other way."

"I will." She caught his skeptical look. "I will. Just... let me get settled first. Figure out this move. Then I'll deal with my mother's disappointment."

"Maybe she'll surprise you."

Naz thought about her mother's face the day she announced she was moving to London for her master’s instead of taking that fast track PhD offer at her alma mater. The tight smile when she joined Delta instead of a "proper" sorority. The cold silence when she chose clinical psychology over cognitive practice.

"Yeah," she muttered. "She's full of surprises."

Aurélien must have heard something in her voice because he lifted her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. "Whatever happens, you've got me. Got all of us."

And maybe that was what scared her most – how much she was starting to believe him.

The smell of Josette's cooking hit them before they even opened the front door. Naz's stomach growled, reminding her she'd barely eaten on the flight.

"Ma fille!" Josette appeared from the kitchen, wiping her hands on her apron. "How was the flight? The morning sickness?"

"More like all-day sickness," Naz admitted as Josette pulled her into a warm hug.

"Ah, just like me with this one." She gestured at Aurélien. "Sick until five months. But the fish will help."

"Maman, you didn't have to stay and cook-"

"Of course I did. Nazanin needs proper food, not your takeout." She shooed them toward the stairs. "Go, go. Get settled. I'm just taking the fish out and then leaving you two for your..." She made air quotes, "date."

Aurélien groaned. "Maman..."

"What? I think it's sweet. Better late than never, non?" She headed back to the kitchen, humming something that sounded suspiciously like a lullaby.

Twenty minutes later, after Naz had freshened up and changed, they came down to find the dining room transformed. Candles lit, table set properly, wine glasses filled with what looked like sparkling water.

"Your mom did all this?"

"She's... invested," Aurélien said, pulling out her chair.

"I can see that."

Josette appeared with the fish, set it down with a flourish. "Now, I'm going out with Denise. Don't forget the dessert in the fridge. And Aurélien?"

"Oui?"

"Be a gentleman." She kissed them both on the cheek and practically floated out, leaving them alone.

"So..." Naz watched him light the last candle. "First date."

"First proper date," he corrected, sitting across from her. "Though technically, Paris could count."

"Paris was a bootycall and you know it."

He laughed, the sound warm in the candlelight. "A very nice bootycall though."

"The nicest." She took a bite of fish, nearly moaning at the taste. "Okay, your mom needs to teach me how to cook like this."

"She will. She's already planning cooking lessons." He watched her eat with that soft look he got sometimes. "Tell me something I don't know about you."

"You know everything about me."

"Not everything. Like... what made you choose clinical psychology?"

She thought about it, taking another bite. "Honestly? Growing up with my mom... made me interested in why people are the way they are. Why they push their kids certain ways. How trauma and expectations shape us."

"And you didn't want to specialize in anything specific?"

"I like the breadth of clinical work. Getting to help different kinds of people, understanding various mental health issues." She glanced at him. "Though lately I've had a few athlete clients. They find it helpful that I understand the pressure of performance."

"From your dad?"

"Yeah. Growing up around his analysis of sports, seeing how mental health affects performance... it definitely influences how I approach therapy." She took a sip of water. "Your turn. Tell me something I don't know about you."

"I'm terrified of spiders."

She nearly choked. "What?"

"Can't stand them. Cama has to kill them for me at training."

"The great Aurélien Tchouaméni, afraid of tiny spiders?"

"They're creepy! All those legs..." He shuddered dramatically.

The conversation flowed easily after that. They talked about first crushes, embarrassing moments, favorite books.

"It's weird," she said later, as they finished dessert. "How we did everything backward."

"Backward?"

"Yeah. Like, we had sex first, then got pregnant, now we're finally having our first date..."

"Maybe we're just making our own timeline." His hand found hers across the table. "Our own rules."

Looking at him in the candlelight, Naz thought maybe he was right. Maybe their story didn't need to follow anyone else's path.

"Another thing you don't know about me," she said softly. "I'm really glad we're doing this. The date thing."

"Me too." His smile was worth every backward step that led them here. "Not tired yet, are you?"

"Depends what you're plotting."

"Want to go out?"

Naz raised an eyebrow. "And do what? Can't exactly hit the clubs like before."

"I was thinking..." He grinned. "Arcade?"

"Arcade?" She stared at him. "Really, Aurel?"

"Why not?" His smile was dangerous – the same one that usually preceded some of their wilder adventures. His eyes twinkled in the candlelight. "Could be fun."

"We're not little kids, Aurélien."

"Oh really? Says the girl who watched cartoons with me until 4 AM that time in Budapest?"

Heat flooded her cheeks at the memory. That night after his first match as interim captain for Les Bleus. They'd been riding the high of the win, of his performance, of everything that followed in that hotel room – things that would make Josette clutch her pearls if she knew.

Then somehow they'd ended up watching French-dubbed Dragon Tales of all things, tangled in hotel sheets, her body still bearing marks from their….activities.

"That was different," she muttered. "We were... distracted."

His grin widened. "I remember. You kept trying to test your skills and translate it to English."

"Until you shut me up."

"Very effectively, if I remember right."

She kicked him under the table. "You're terrible."

"And you're avoiding the arcade question." He leaned forward. "Come on, Naz. Let me beat you at ski ball."

"As if I’ll let you win."

"That sounds like a challenge."

She shouldn't. She was tired from the flight, from the move, from growing a whole human. But something about the way he was looking at her, about how he was trying to make this – them – feel normal...

"Fine," she conceded. "But when I destroy you at Dance Dance Revolution, don't cry."

His laugh was worth any exhaustion tomorrow might bring. "There's my girl."

My girl. The words settled warm in her chest, right next to where their baby was growing.

"But first," she stood, moving to his side of the table. "I think you owe me a proper first date kiss."

His hands found her waist immediately, pulling her between his legs. "Thought that came at the end of the date?"

"We're doing everything else backward," she reminded him. "Why start following rules now?"

When he kissed her, she tasted promise – of arcade games and cartoon nights, of backward timelines and forward momentum, of everything they could be if they just let themselves try.

Morning sunlight painted stripes across Aurélien's bedroom, catching dust motes and memories of last night. The massive teddy bear he'd won at free throws sat in the corner, looking absurdly out of place among his minimalist decor.

"Can't believe you actually made those shots," Naz mumbled against his chest. "Mr. 'I play football, not basketball.'"

"Can't believe you destroyed me at ski ball." His fingers traced lazy patterns on her stomach. "My ego may never recover."

"Poor baby."

"Speaking of baby..." His hand splayed wider across her abdomen. "When do you think you'll start showing?"

She hummed thoughtfully. "Few more weeks maybe? Though your mom swears she can already tell."

"Maman thinks she knows everything."

"She kind of does though."

They lay in comfortable silence, his fingertips still mapping the territory their child would soon make known.

"It's weird, right?" she said finally. "That we're actually having a baby?"

"So weird." He shifted to look at her properly. "Like, there's really a whole person in there. That we made. On that balcony in Mallorca."

"Stop," she laughed, but he was grinning.

"Just saying, that view was worth it."

"The view or what happened with the view?"

His grin turned wicked. "Both."

Last night felt like a dream – running around the arcade like teenagers, stealing kisses between games, him showing off at the basketball hoops until she shut him up by demolishing his ski ball score. They'd gotten ice cream after, walked through Madrid's streets hand in hand, and for a moment it was like they were just two people falling in love, not two people preparing for parenthood.

"What about names?" he asked suddenly.

"Already?"

"Just thinking about it. Maybe something French and American? Or Cameroonian?"

She traced the planes of his chest, considering. "You have any ideas?"

"Maybe." He caught her hand, pressed a kiss to her palm. "But I'm not telling yet."

"Tease."

"You love it."

Did she? Love it? Love him? The thought should terrify her but somehow, lying here with Madrid's sun warming the sheets and his hand on their baby, it didn't seem so scary to fall in love with him.

"Last night was nice," she said instead. "Felt normal."

"We can be normal." He pulled her closer. "Just... our kind of normal."

"Our kind of normal includes a baby now."

"Yeah." His voice held wonder. "Weird how that's not as scary as it was two weeks ago."

She knew what he meant. Somewhere between hospital rooms and arcade games, between morning sickness and midnight ice cream, between London and Madrid, terror had softened into something else. Something that felt a lot like hope.

"We're really doing this," she whispered.

"We're really doing this," he confirmed, then added with a smirk, "After we sleep more. Someone kept me up late beating me at games."

"Poor professional athlete, defeated by ski ball."

His retaliation tickle attack was worth the shrieking that probably woke up half of La Finca. The tickle fight soon dissolved into something softer, his hands gentling on her sides as she straddled him. When their lips met, it felt like coming home. Aurélien kissed like he played football – with purpose, with skill, with an intensity that took her breath away. His tongue traced the seam of her lips before deepening the kiss, one hand tangling in her hair while the other pressed against her lower back.

There was something different about kissing him now. Maybe it was the morning light making everything feel more real, or maybe it was knowing their baby was growing between them, or maybe it was just them – finally letting themselves have this, have each other, without pretense or games.

They broke apart with matching grins, both a little dazed. Naz studied his face – those dark eyes that seemed to see right through her, that sharp jawline she'd traced countless times, those full lips still curved in a smile. How was it possible for someone to be this beautiful? Even with bed head and morning stubble, he was unfairly handsome.

His phone buzzed on the nightstand.

"Ignore it," she murmured, leaning in for another kiss. "I want more kisses."

"You do?" His smile turned playful.

She nodded, capturing his lips again. They lost themselves for a few more moments until another buzz interrupted.

"Let me check this really quick."

She let out an exaggerated groan, complete with pout.

"Don't give me that face, Naz."

"But Aurel-"

"Just a second okay?" His hands squeezed her hips. "Maybe I'll give you some dick too..."

"Promise?" She batted her eyelashes at him.

He caressed her chin with gentle fingers. "Promise."

Naz settled against his bare chest as he reached for his phone, her fingers absently playing with the trail of hair below his navel. She felt the moment his body tensed.

"Putain," he cursed.

"What's wrong?"

He turned the screen toward her. Twitter was exploding with photos – them at the arcade last night, him winning the teddy bear, her laughing as he failed at ski ball. But as he scrolled down the thread, her blood ran cold.

There she was, outside her therapist's office in London, clearly taken with a long lens. The tweet above it speculating about why Tchouaméni's girl needed counseling.

Their bubble of morning bliss popped instantly.

"Fuck," she whispered, sitting up. "How did they-"

"I'm calling Simon." His voice had that edge now, the one that meant someone was about to have a very bad day. "This stops now."

But they both knew it wouldn't stop. Couldn't stop. Because this was their life now – private moments made public, speculation about every move they made.

So much for their kind of normal.

Naz grabbed her own phone with shaking hands, Twitter already lighting up her notifications.

FootballLeaks: Why is Tchouaméni's girl at a counseling center? 🤔 Problems in paradise already?

MadridInsider: Sources say she's been going weekly. Must be rough being a WAG...

"Don't read the comments," Aurélien said, but she was already scrolling.

Then someone dropped another bomb – a photo from eight months ago at Cama's party. Her and Destiny, glasses in hand, laughing about something she couldn't even remember now. The caption made her feel sick:

RealMadridTea: Like bestie like bestie? First Cama, now Tchouaméni... and look who's with Vini now 👀 These girls have a type! #JerseyHoppers

The replies were worse:

they pass these girls around like pokemon cards fr

nah destiny upgraded to vini but naz got the bag with tchou

"Naz." Aurélien's voice seemed far away. "Give me the phone."

"They think I'm like her," she whispered. "They think I'm jumping from player to player like-"

"Stop." He took her phone gently but firmly. "You know that's not true."

"But-"

"No buts." He pulled her against his chest. "You're nothing like her. The people who matter know that."

She could hear him on the phone with Simon now, voice tight with controlled anger. Words like "invasion of privacy" floated around her, but all she could think about was that photo with Destiny. How happy they'd looked. How fake it all was.

"They're watching me at therapy," she said when he hung up. "Taking pictures of me at therapy, Aurel."

"Simon's handling it."

"That won't stop them from comparing me to her. From thinking I'm just another-"

"Look at me." He tilted her chin up. "You're the mother of my child. My girl. Nothing else matters."

"But Vini-"

"Already knows the truth about Destiny. Cama told him everything last night."

That made her pause. "He did?"

"Yeah. Apparently he wasn't too happy about being lied to." Aurélien's thumb stroked her cheek. "The truth always comes out, bébé. Let them talk. We know what's real."

She leaned into his touch, trying to find comfort in his certainty. But the image of her outside that counseling office kept flashing in her mind.

"I go to therapy because I want to be better," she said quietly. "Because I want to understand myself, help other people. Not because-"

"You don't have to explain." His kiss was soft against her forehead. "Not to me, not to anyone."

Her phone buzzed again in his hand. More notifications, more speculation, more hate probably.

"What do we do now?"

"Now?" He set both their phones aside. "Now we go back to our morning. Don't let them steal this from us too."

But as he pulled her back down into the sheets, as his lips found hers again, she couldn't help wondering how many more private moments would become public spectacle. How many more comparisons to Destiny she'd have to endure.

"Aurel?" Her voice was small against his chest.

"Mm?"

"What if..." She swallowed hard. "What if they have pictures from the other clinic too?"

His body tensed beneath her. "What other clinic?"

"The abortion counselor." The words felt heavy in the morning air. "What if they saw me there and-"

"Hey." He shifted to look at her properly. "That was private. That was your choice to consider, and-"

"And what if they post it? What if they twist it into something ugly?" Her voice cracked. "They'd crucify me. Call me a baby killer or say I tried to-"

"Stop." His hands framed her face. "First of all, getting counseling about your options was the responsible thing to do. Second, if anyone tries to shame you for that, they'll have to deal with me."

"But your image-"

"Fuck my image." The intensity in his voice made her blink. "You were scared and alone because I blocked you like an idiot. You had every right to consider all your options."

She traced patterns on his chest, not meeting his eyes. "The fans wouldn't see it that way."

"The fans don't get a vote in our personal decisions." His thumb wiped away a tear she hadn't realized had fallen. "And if those pictures exist? We handle it. Together."

"How?"

"By telling the truth. That we made a choice – together – to have this baby. That we're happy about it. That whatever came before was our business and no one else's."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that." He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Though Simon might have a heart attack if we're that direct."

That startled a laugh out of her. "He does prefer his PR statements very... sanitized."

"Very boring, you mean." His fingers tangled in her hair. "But seriously, Naz. Nothing they could leak would change how I feel about you. About us."

"Promise?"

"On everything." His hand found her stomach again. "On both of you."

She settled back against him, letting his heartbeat steady her. "Your mom would probably fight anyone who tried to shame us anyway."

"Probably? Definitely. Maman's already got her wooden spoon ready."

The mental image of Josette chasing Twitter trolls with a spoon made her giggle. "We're gonna be okay, right?"

His kiss was answer enough, soft and sure against her lips. "More than okay. We're gonna be amazing."

Maybe we will be okay…..

"I'll make breakfast," Aurélien added. "Pancakes?"

Naz hummed in agreement, but the moment he left the room, she reached for her phone again. She knew better – knew doom scrolling while hormonal was a recipe for disaster, but she couldn't help herself.

Instagram was worse than Twitter. FootballWAGsTea had already posted a series of photos: her outside the counseling office, at the arcade with Aurélien, and that damning shot with Destiny from Cama's party.

Swipe for the tea! Looks like Tchouaméni's new girl has a history with the WAG scene... 👀 Sources say she was close with Destiny (now dating Vini Jr) when Des was with Camavinga! Pattern? 🤔

The comments made her stomach turn:

she looks desperate tbh

at least destiny is upfront about what she wants

notice how she only goes for the rich ones

bet she's trying to trap him

If they only knew, she thought bitterly. Then the familiar wave of nausea hit – stronger this time, probably triggered by stress and an empty stomach.

She barely made it to Aurélien's ensuite bathroom before losing what little was in her stomach. Morning sickness was brutal enough without adding social media anxiety to the mix.

"Naz?" Aurélien's voice carried from the bedroom. "You okay?"

She wanted to answer, but another wave hit. Then his hands were there, holding back her hair, rubbing her back.

"I told you to stay off social media," he said softly.

"Since when do I listen?" she managed between heaves.

"Hardheaded."

"You like it."

He didn't deny it, just kept rubbing her back as she emptied her stomach. When she finally sat back, he handed her a warm washcloth.

"The pancakes are burning," she whispered.

"Fuck the pancakes." He settled on the bathroom floor beside her. "What did you just see?"

"Nothing I didn't expect." She leaned into him. "Just... hits different now. With the baby and everything."

His hand found her stomach automatically. "They still don't know shit about us."

"They think they do though. Think they know everything." Her laugh was hollow. "Wait till they find out about this."

"Hey." He turned her face toward him. "When they find out about our baby, it'll be because we choose to tell them. On our terms."

"If they don't figure it out first."

"Then they figure it out. But right now?" His kiss was soft against her temple. "Right now it's just us. Our secret."

The smell of burning pancakes finally reached them.

"You really left the stove on?"

"Shit." He scrambled up. "Stay here. Drink water. No more social media."

"Yes, captain," she mock saluted, but her smile faded as soon as he left.

Her phone sat accusingly on the bathroom counter. One notification caught her eye:

@FootballWAGsTea: Anyone else notice she's been looking... different lately?

The nausea returned full force.

******************************************************

Josette had confiscated her phone with all the gentle authority of a mother who'd raised a stubborn son. "No more stress," she'd said firmly, tucking the phone away in her room before leaving. "Doctor's orders."

Now Naz was stuck in this massive villa with nothing but her thoughts and a weirdly clingy Ocho. She'd tried Netflix, but nothing held her attention. Prime was just as useless, despite Aurélien paying for every streaming service known to man.

"This is what happens when your social media addiction gets cut off," she told Ocho, who'd been following her room to room like a furry shadow. "You realize you don't know how to function without it."

The dog just tilted his head, staying closer than usual. Maybe he could smell the changes in her body. She'd read somewhere that dogs could detect pregnancy.

Unpacking seemed like the responsible thing to do. She managed to get through organizing her toiletries and hanging up the clothes from her carry-on before restlessness hit again. That's when she caught her reflection in Aurélien's full-length mirror.

She turned sideways, studying her profile. Still flat, still just... her. If it wasn't for the constant nausea and two positive tests and that grainy ultrasound image, she wouldn't believe there was actually a baby in there.

Her hand found her stomach, pressing gently. Nothing felt different. She poked her belly out deliberately, trying to imagine what she'd look like in a few months.

"What do you think, Ocho?" she grabbed one of the decorative pillows from Aurélien's bed. "Think I'll look like this?"

She stuffed the pillow under her shirt, smoothing the fabric until she had what she imagined was a decent fake baby bump. The sight made her breath catch.

"Weird, right?" she whispered to Ocho, who'd settled at her feet. "There's really a baby in here. Like, an actual human that me and your dad made."

But besides the morning sickness – which was really all-day sickness – she didn't feel pregnant. Shouldn't she feel different? More maternal? More... something?

The tests said she was pregnant. The ultrasound showed that tiny flutter of heartbeat. Aurélien's mom was already planning nursery colors and Aurélien himself had downloaded three different baby apps.

But standing here, alone with her reflection and a fake pillow bump, it felt surreal. Like playing pretend.

She pulled the pillow out, letting her shirt fall flat again. Her fingers traced where their baby was supposedly growing.

"Your dad's at PT right now," she told her stomach, feeling only slightly crazy for talking to it. "Probably driving his trainers nuts asking about what exercises are safe around pregnant women."

Ocho whined, pawing at her leg.

"Yeah, you're right. I'm being weird." She scratched behind his ears. "Just trying to wrap my head around all this. Being here, being pregnant, being..."

Being what? Aurélien's girlfriend? Baby mama? Future WAG?

She caught her reflection again, trying to see what those gossip blogs saw. Did she look different? Could people tell?

Or was she just looking for changes that weren't visible yet, like searching for proof that this was all real and not some elaborate dream she'd wake up from?

"Come on," she told Ocho. "Let's stop before I completely lose it talking to myself in mirrors."

But she couldn't help one last glance at her profile, one last moment of wondering when she'd start to see on the outside what she knew was growing inside.

When this would start feeling real.

Naz abandoned the mirror to sit on Aurélien's – their? – bed, Ocho following faithfully. Her hand hadn't left her stomach.

Lamaze classes. She almost laughed at the thought. Aurélien was so excited about them, had already picked out an English-speaking instructor and everything. Would she be the youngest one there? Would the other moms judge her? Maybe she should join one of those mommy groups too, though the thought made her cringe. She'd seen those groups at the parks in London, all designer strollers and organic snacks.

"Never thought I'd be here," she told Ocho, who rested his head on her lap. "Like, this was never the plan."

The plan had been perfect: graduate high school with honors, get through Rutgers without any "distractions" (her mother's word for boys), finish her master's, establish her career. She'd been so careful, so responsible. Hell, she'd made it through four years of college without so much as a pregnancy scare.

But one weekend in Mallorca with a footballer...

"It is what it is," she muttered, echoing Aurélien's favorite phrase.

The option to terminate was still there. Technically. She knew the timeline, knew her rights. Had literally marched in protests supporting those rights. Funny how different it felt when it was your body, your baby, your choice.

Her fingers traced patterns on her stomach. Their baby. Because somewhere between that first positive test and now, it had become real. Become wanted. Even with all the terror and uncertainty, even with her career hanging in limbo, even with the social media harassment...

"I have Aurélien," she reminded herself. "And Josette. And Uncle Bertrand."

Family. Support. Love. Things she hadn't expected to find when she first started hanging around footballers. Things that made the idea of motherhood slightly less terrifying.

But then there was her own mother.

"Fuck," she groaned, falling back on the bed. Ocho immediately scooted up next to her.

How do you tell your perfectionist mother that you got knocked up by a casual fling? That you're moving countries for said fling? That all her careful planning and guidance led to her daughter becoming exactly what she'd warned against?

The fact that the "fling" was a millionaire footballer probably wouldn't help. Her mother had very specific ideas about athletes and the women who dated them.

"She's going to kill me," Naz told the ceiling. "Actually murder me. Then resurrect me to lecture me about responsibility and throwing away my future."

But what future was she throwing away really? She could still practice – maybe even build a niche helping other athletes and their families. Could still make something of herself beyond just being Aurélien's girlfriend or baby mama.

Baby mama. God, she hated that term. Made her sound like some stereotype, like what those Twitter trolls thought she was.

"Not that it matters what they think," she said to her stomach. "Your dad's right about that at least."

Her hand settled over where their baby was growing. All these plans she'd never thought to make, all these decisions she never expected to face. Lamaze classes and mommy groups and birth plans and...

"Holy shit," she whispered. "I'm actually going to be someone's mother."

The thought should terrify her more. Maybe it would later. But right now, lying here with Ocho's steady presence and the memory of Aurélien's excitement about those damn Lamaze classes...

Maybe it wasn't the future she'd planned. Maybe it wasn't the path her mother had mapped out. Maybe it wasn't what anyone expected of her.

But maybe, just maybe, it could be better than any plan she'd made for herself.

"Papa est rentré!" Aurélien's voice carried up from downstairs, followed by the clicking of Ocho's nails against the hardwood as the dog abandoned his post by her side.

She could track their movement through the house – Aurélien's heavy footsteps, his voice going soft and silly as he talked to Ocho. "Où est maman? Where's mommy, huh?"

Ocho's excited panting led them right to the bedroom, where she was still sprawled on her back, contemplating existence.

"Should I dissociate with you?," Aurélien teased from the doorway.

"Be my guest."

"Sarcastic ass," he muttered, kissing his teeth, but she heard him toeing off his Nikes before the bed dipped with his weight beside her.

"How's the ankle?"

"Good. Ready for Athletic Club next week."

Then quiet settled over them – not the awkward kind from their early days, but the comfortable silence of two people who'd seen each other at their worst and chosen to stay anyway. The afternoon sun painted shadows across the ceiling, and somewhere below Ocho's collar jingled as he settled.

"Did you know," Aurélien's voice was soft but certain, "that our baby is the size of a raspberry right now?"

The corners of her mouth lifted. "Let me guess – one of your baby apps told you that?"

"Also told me my sperm determined the sex." She could hear the smile in his voice. "So technically, whatever we're having is my fault."

"Everything's your fault."

His chuckle was rich and deep, vibrating through the mattress between them. The sound always did something to her insides, even before all this.

"What do you want?" she asked, turning her head to look at him. "And don't give me that 'as long as it's healthy' bullshit."

He laughed again, caught. "That obvious?"

"That diplomatic. Very PR of you."

His smile went softer as he met her eyes. "A girl."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." His hand found her stomach. "Little princess to spoil. Someone who looks just like you."

"Poor kid if she gets your height and my curves."

"She'd be perfect." The certainty in his voice made her chest tight. "Just like her mama."

Looking at him in the afternoon light, all earnest eyes and gentle touches, Naz thought maybe dissociating wasn't necessary after all. Maybe this reality was better than anything she could escape to.

"I want a boy," Naz said, turning on her side to face him properly. "A little mama's boy like his daddy."

"I am not a mama's boy-"

"Says the man whose mother confiscated my phone and you didn't even question it."

"That's different," he protested, but his grin gave him away. "And anyway, hopefully not too much of a mama's boy." His voice shifted into an exaggerated Cameroonian accent, clearly imitating his father: "Strong sons, Aurélien! We need strong sons! Not these boys always running to their mothers!"

Naz burst out laughing. "Your dad does not sound like that!"

"You haven't heard him after a few drinks at family gatherings." He kept the accent going. "My son, the footballer! But why you let your mother feed you so much? Where is the discipline?"

"Stop!" She was really giggling now. "Fernand would kill you if he heard this."

"Probably." His voice returned to normal, but his eyes still danced with mischief. "But for real, can you imagine? A little boy with your smile and my footwork?"

"More like your smile and my attitude."

"God help us all," he said with a dramatic eye roll.

She poked his side. "You love my attitude."

"Most days." He caught her hand, pressing a kiss to her palm. "When you're not being hardheaded."

"Says the most stubborn person in Madrid."

"Second most stubborn. Clearly you're first."

Their laughter faded into something softer, his thumb tracing circles on her wrist.

"Boy or girl though," he said quietly. "They're gonna be so loved."

And that, Naz thought, was probably the truest thing either of them had said all day.

"Should we do a naming ceremony?" Naz asked, watching his long fingers move to trace patterns on her stomach. "Like, is that something your family would expect?"

Aurélien's eyebrows furrowed before his lips curved into that knowing smirk. "Oh, you trying to be African African now?"

She rolled her eyes at his teasing. "I don't know, I've never had a baby before." A pause. "You had one, right?"

"Mhm." His movements were characteristically slow, deliberate as he shifted closer. Those athlete's hands spanning her stomach easily. "Parents even took me back to Cameroon when I was little. Maybe two? Three? After the naming ceremony in France."

His tongue darted out to wet his lips – a tell she'd noticed happened when he was thinking deeply about something.

"Your sister came for that, right? Your mom mentioned she stayed a few weeks when you were born."

"Yeah, Clarisse was there." He sucked his teeth, a habit that came out most when he was being sarcastic or attitude-heavy. "Seven-year-old big sister apparently wasn't too happy about me stealing all the attention."

"But she got over it?"

"Eventually." His swagger was still evident even lying down. "Now she's out in Lagos doing her NGO thing, acting like she wasn't trying to trade me for a puppy when I was born."

"She works with refugees, right?" Naz remembered Yannis bringing it up at dinner. "That's amazing."

"Yeah, she's the real deal. Dad's first wife's daughter but..." He shrugged those broad shoulders. "She's just my sister, you know? Been there my whole life."

"Think she'll come when our baby's born?"

His face softened. "Probably. She already texts Maman asking for updates about you."

"Really?"

"Mhm. Whole family's invested now." His hand slid up to cup her face, those long fingers gentle against her skin. "So yeah, we can do whatever ceremonies you want. Mix it all up – Cameroonian, American, French..."

"You just want an excuse for multiple parties."

He kissed his teeth again, but his eyes were laughing. "Maybe. Or maybe I just want to show off my family."

The way he said it – my family – made something warm bloom in her chest.

"Your African African family?" she teased.

"Quiet," but he was grinning that megawatt smile. "You know what I mean."

And she did. Somehow, impossibly, she really did.

Aurélien pulled his Urus into the training facility lot, catching sight of Denise Bellingham's car dropping off Jude. He shook his head – boy was too grown to still be getting rides from his mama.

"Ay!" He called out after parking, dapping up Jude. "Your barber coming through?"

"Yeah, hitting the house later. You need a cut?"

"Maybe." Aurélien ran a hand over his fade. "Unlike some lightskin pretty boys who can’t go months without a trim."

"Don't hate." Jude flashed that signature grin. "We can't all be blessed like me."

"Blessed? Bro, you don't even drive."

"And? Girls still love me."

"Girls gonna love you less when they find out their man needs his mama for transportation."

Jude just laughed, clearly unbothered. "They still fuck me though."

"You're impossible." Aurélien shook his head, but he was fighting a smile.

"Speaking of impossible..." Jude fell into step beside him as they headed inside. "How's Naz? The baby?"

"Good. She's settling in."

"Cool, cool. So about names-"

"Jude..."

"Hear me out!" His eyes lit up with that mischievous glint. "What about Judah? Biblical, you know? Or Judith for a girl?"

Aurélien kissed his teeth. "We're not naming our baby after you."

"Why not? I'm gorgeous, talented-"

"Humble."

"Exactly!" Jude was properly grinning now. "Plus, think how good Jude Tchouaméni sounds."

"You're actually insane."

"Judette? Judina? We can get creative with it."

"I'm walking away now."

"Jude Junior? JJ for short?"

Aurélien flipped him off without looking back, Jude's laughter echoing through the facility.

"Just think about it!" Jude called after him. "Your kid could be named after a legend!"

"A legend who can't drive!" Aurélien shot back.

Jude's "Still gets more play than you!" followed him into the locker room.

Some things never changed. And maybe that was good – having this normalcy, these friendships, while everything else in his life was shifting.

Even if his best friend was an absolutely shameless lightskin who needed better name suggestions.

*****************************************************

Back on the pitch, everything else faded away. This was where Aurélien lived, where everything made sense. The grass under his boots, the familiar weight of the ball, the rhythm of drills he could do in his sleep.

His ankle felt good – strong. The medical team had done their job, and those endless PT sessions were paying off. He intercepted a pass from Kylian with his usual precision, his body remembering exactly how to move, when to strike.

"Looking good, Tchou!" Carlo called from the sideline. "How's it feeling?"

"Perfect, Coach!" And it was. This was perfect.

They ran positioning drills, the kind of tactical work that made his brain light up. Reading the game, anticipating movements – this was his element. He could feel Jude and Cama watching him carefully at first, probably worried about the ankle, but after his third perfect tackle, they stopped holding back.

"Showing off for the baby mama?" Cama teased after Aurélien executed a particularly clean sliding challenge.

"Nah," he grinned, that familiar swagger returning. "Teaching you how it's done."

The ball felt like an extension of himself, his touches precise, his positioning flawless. Being sidelined had been torture, but maybe it had been good for him. Made him hungry. Made him appreciate this more.

Sweat dripped down his back as they moved into a practice match. This was where he thrived – the chess match of midfield battles, the quick decisions, the perfect passes. His long legs ate up the pitch as he tracked back, intercepted, distributed.

"Damn," he heard Vini mutter after he broke up another attack. "Man came back different."

Different was right. Everything was different now. He had more to play for, more to prove. A family to support, a legacy to build.

The afternoon sun beat down on Madrid's training ground, but Aurélien barely felt it. All he felt was the game, the movement, the pure joy of being back where he belonged.

His ankle didn't even twinge when he launched into a perfectly timed tackle, stealing the ball from Kylian and immediately finding Jude with a long pass.

"Show off," Jude laughed.

But Aurélien just smiled. Because yeah, maybe he was showing off a little. Maybe he wanted to prove something – to himself, to the team, to everyone who'd write stories about how fatherhood might affect his game.

Prove that he could have both. The career and the family. The glory and the responsibility. The pitch and the nursery.

His next tackle was even cleaner, his next pass even sharper.

The water break turned into what it usually did – them clowning around, Kylian showing off some new handshake with Vini while Jude recorded for his Instagram stories.

Then Cama, never one to keep thoughts to himself, had to bring it up: "So you still messing with Destiny or what?"

Vini shrugged, that easy Brazilian swagger intact. "She knows what it is."

"What it is?" Cama grabbed his dreads in disbelief. "Bro, what are you doing?"

"Relax." Vini took a long drink. "I told her to back off, yeah? No trying to get in with the WAGs, no bothering Naz."

"How'd she take that?" Jude asked, putting his phone away.

The look Vini gave them said everything – she hadn't taken it well at all, but she'd agreed. For now.

"You don't know Des like I do though," Cama shook his head. "When she wants something..."

"Bro, she tried to trap you," Kylian cut in. "Tell him."

"Yo," Cama held up his hands. "She was giving me head, right? But wouldn't swallow. Caught her trying to save that shit."

"What the fuck?" Vini's face twisted in disgust.

"Nah for real! That's why I'm telling you-"

"She really tried to..." Jude made a face. "Save it?"

"Like in a cup and everything." Cama was on a roll now. "I told you about her, Vini. That girl's got plans."

Aurélien, who'd been quietly hydrating, felt all eyes turn to him.

"At least Naz was straight up about it," Cama added. "Told you as soon as she found out."

"After you blocked her," Jude reminded him.

"Yeah well..." Aurélien wiped his face with a towel. "We fixed that."

"And now you're having a whole baby," Kylian grinned.

"A baby Jude," Jude added helpfully.

"We're not naming the baby after you-"

"Anyway," Cama cut in, "all I'm saying is be careful, Vini. Des sees you got that new contract..."

"She knows better," Vini insisted, but something flickered in his expression.

"That's what I thought too." Cama took another drink. "Then I caught her with the cup."

The collective grimace that followed had their trainer calling them back to drills. But as they jogged back to position, Aurélien caught Vini's thoughtful look.

Some lessons, he figured, you had to learn the hard way. He just hoped Vini figured it out before he ended up with his own cup story to tell.

******************************************************

The high of training carried through his shower, through the locker room banter, all the way to his car. His body had that good kind of tired – the satisfied ache of doing what he was born to do.

"Tchou!" Carlo caught him before he could leave. "Good session today. Very good."

"Thanks, Coach."

"And..." his coach's knowing smile appeared. "How is everything else? The personal situation?"

Aurélien couldn't help his own smile. "Good. Really good."

"Babies and football," Carlo shook his head fondly. "Changes everything, no? Makes you play... different."

"Different how?"

"More focused. More..." he gestured vaguely. "Complete. You play like a man with purpose now."

The words followed him to his Urus, settled in his chest as he pulled out his phone. Three messages from Naz:

Your mom finally gave me my phone back

Already regret asking for it

But I found a onesie with "Future Midfielder" on it so maybe social media isn't all bad

His fingers flew over the keyboard: Buy it. Buy ten.

Someone's in a good mood

Killed it at training. Ankle's perfect.

My strong baby daddy 💪🏾

He laughed out loud at that, the sound echoing in his car. Then another text:

Found some more nursery stuff. Come look when you're home?

Home. Where Naz was waiting. Where their baby was growing. Where everything made sense in a different way than it did on the pitch, but just as perfectly.

On my way, he typed back. Got something to tell you about Des too.

Tea? 👀

The whole pot bébé

Starting the car, Aurélien felt that same certainty he'd had on the pitch. Different was good. Different was right. Different was exactly where he needed to be.

His ankle didn't even twinge as he pressed the gas. Some things just needed a little time to heal properly. To come back stronger.

Maybe relationships were like that too.

…………………tbd

#quainwritings #aurelien tchouameni #quain’s masterlist #aurelien tchouameni x black oc #aurelien tchouameni fanfiction #aurelien tchouameni x black reader #aurelien tchouameni x reader #aurelien tchouameni fanfic #aurelien tchouameni fic #aurelien tchouameni imagines #footballer x oc

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midnight-mourning · 3 days ago

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Valentine's is Over! What now?

Hello! This is a bit of an update post now that DCA Valentine's has finsihed up. Feel free to read what you want (though I suggest at least skimming all of it so you're aware of what's happening with me) and make sure to vote in the polls!

Starting first and foremost, thank you to everyone who submitted requests! They were all genuinely lots of fun and I hope the stories I wrote for them were enjoyable ^^ Couldn't have done the event without y'all so thank you for the lovely ideas

@rosescarletful @amarynthian-chronicles @dangerva @alynwrench

@luckyyyduckyyy @fishm0ther @juukai @divinit3a @zenkaiankoku

@starspindle @that-one-unknown-artist @milosmantis @pip-plz

Secondly, I want to give a MASSIVE thank you to the lovely wonderful amazing artists who volunteered to make doodles for the stories!! Everyone killed it and I'm so very appreciative of you taking the time to make things for my silly bits of writing shfkjsdkljflks Like seriously, it was so flattering to have people initially reach out/agree and then even more so to see the art you made as a results i just AHHHH I CANT SAY THANK YOU ENOUGH, appreciate you guys very much guhhhh <333333

@divinit3a @cozycitrus @soupdweller @juukai

HIGHLY reccommend everyone to go check out their blogs & content in general, everyone makes soooo cool art and oooo you wanna go give them some love soooo bad

Alright, with that, let's get into the meat of things; what's next?

put under the break bc there's several things happening, again skim if you want but make sure to do the poll though!

Gen writing update

I had a few requests come in after they closed (no worries to those who did so! I know it was a little confusing regarding such) so i'll be writing those when i get the chance and sending them out into the world, beyond that however, any request-based things are closed (for now) if I get any during this closed period I'm sorry but I'll have to ignore them/not do them. I'm too busy with life/other wips to add them to my list, sorry!

Holiday Spirit is going to be my writing focus for the next couple weeks! It's about halfway done and I'd like it finished so I can move on with things lol

Confused spirit is going to take a bit, as like i've said before I'm writing multiple chapters back to back for the purpose on ensuring proper flow/building my buffer back up, i know it's been a bit but believe me it's been on my mind guhh

In general i have some shorter form content/drabbles & oneshots I want to write, so be on the lookout for those >:)c

Speaking on all of the above, if you want to stay up to date with my writing, I highly reccommend joining the tag list i have! My things tend to get buried otherwise >-< Just tell me you'd like added and I'll include you :)

Poll!

I've done requests now for December/holidays, and Valentine's now too. There's no major holidays coming up for a while, BUT there is an event, in May... specifically... So,

Additionally, since the art aspect of Valentine's went so well, I'll probably look for artists again to do some drawing and will run it pretty similar to this time, so if you're interested lmk :)c

Comments & Asks

While I won't be posting/active for a few weeks, I WILL be going through and answering comments, asks, and so on from people that have been collecting in my inbox oof

PLEASE know that if you've left a comment or sent me an ask that I've seen it and appreciate it very much!!! I just have not had the time to sit down and properly answer them yet, but i will during this break!

Going Dark

I was saving this for the end just because it sounds worse than it actually is.

I'm going to take a break from posting/tumblr/etc for about a week or two and spend some extra hours doing my research stuff. I'm not behind or anything (and def always put it and school first dw) but I kind of want to try and get ahead with it just because of how strict my timeline to finish is 😅

I also just want a bit of a break from constantly writing and maybe do some other hobbies when im not on the research grind. I'll be back at it (again more casually) in a few weeks tho!

by the time you see this I have already begun lol

Leftover things

Since you're here, here's the link to my writing masterpost that includes 99% of my writing stuff!

I also realized while writing this post that I don't have an actual writing tag for non-event related writing... so i'll be fixing that as well during my break

I've gotten a question or two regarding whether my stuff is commision-based or if I have a kofi (which i'll be replying to that ask directly dw whoever you are...) and my answer to that is not currently! BUT, i'll continue to think on it for those who might be interested, if it's something I do consider doing it'll be a bit from now, but I appreciate the thought from those who asked!

I think that's all, thank you again to the requestors and to the lovely lovely artists for this event, and also thank you to those who liked/reblogged my things during this event! It's very much appreciated and I'm glad people had fun ^^ Bye!

#fnaf dca #dca fandom #fnaf sun #fnaf moon #fnaf daycare attendant #dca fic #x reader #sundrop #moondrop #mm dca valentine's #thank you again to everyone #this was greta/a lot of fun #i am still going insane about the art guhhh #and in general excited to share more stuff eventually #for now going to lock in on research EXTRA hard #though maybe not too hard considering some things that just came up oof #its all good tho

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echoingbirdsofprey · 2 days ago

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Delicate (Jake's Version)

Ch 29 - Hold, That Position

Pairing: Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x OFC Samanthan Kazansky

Rating: EXPLICIT (MDNI! SERIOUSLY LOL)

Warnings: LITERALLY ITS JUST SMUT. Blowjob, unprotected!piv, praise kink, Jake absolutely losing his mind like the feral king Sam wants him to be

A/N: It's...it's literally just smut. LOL. Likes, comments, reblogs, I appreciate every single frigging one and it makes me want to bring you absolutely filthy chapters like this one hahaha. Pic form Pinterest, gif by @kaizsche

If Code Red was the foreplay, this version is the full deal.

Tags: @mrsevans90 @djs8891 @gpsmississippihippie @barnesboo1967 @dizzybee03 @coloraturadiva @kmc1989 @khouse712 @kaleysbookshelf @crossfandomskylines

“Take it. Take all of me, Sam, please.”

She couldn’t stop thinking about his words. They were seared into her neurons, the huskiness in his voice playing over and over in the back of her mind on a fucking loop. He didn’t just mean his body. He meant his mind and his soul too. She asked for this side of Jake, and she knew there was still some parts, that he’d repressed, deep down, that were still fucked up, but she could take it.

Vulnerability. Not a quality that a naval aviator with two confirmed air to air kills wanted on display. But a quality that he wanted to show his fiance. And not only with her. The battered iron armor over his heart was beginning to melt. He was trying.

They had arrived at the Route 66 Auto Museum in New Mexico on a day that they were unfortunately not open. “Do you want to stick around until tomorrow and go then?” Jake asked, parking. They decided they would get out to stretch their legs and let the dogs do the same.

“No, it's okay. We can see it another time. Maybe bring...kids.” Sam suggested, adjusting in the passenger side seat. She glanced back at the dogs then, then back to Jake.

“Sam...” Jake's voice carried a warning, a knowing one, a pleading one, asking her to stop torturing herself.

“I know...I know. I'm just saying. It'd be a good thing to do. Maybe we can steal Jaycen when he's a little older.” She admits.

They stopped for dinner at a small Mexican place on the main street as they passed through. Their driving hours became extended and they decided to go for a while longer, to the hotel near their next stop. They swap places, and Sam drove the rest of the way so that Jake could sleep. He was thankful for her wanting to and they stopped twice along the way to get food for themselves, feed the dogs, again, stretch and take a bathroom break or two.

Jake had underestimated how tiring it would really be to drive but the truck was comfortable and when they finally made it to the hotel, everyone was happy for a bed. Again, Jake had gotten a single bed and there was no couch so they pulled the dogs beds in from the backseat for them to lay on. They set them up in the corner of the room and all three dogs got comfortable immediately.

“I'm gonna take a shower.” Jake murmured, pulling his shirt off. His tags jingled as he pushed his jeans down his hips and bent down to pull them from around his ankles. He threw his clothes in a pile on the floor and then removed his boxer briefs. As they were pushed past his hips, Sam salivated at the sight of his cock, free from its confines, hanging neatly between his legs. Hungman is more like it haha, she thought, then met his eyes.

“Babygirl, I know you want me, you don't have to stare. You can just come and take what you need .” His voice was husky and low as he straightened up. Heat pooled at her core and her eyes were drawn to his, the sage green burning with desire.

“You’re tired.” Sam said softly, as she took a single step toward him. She glanced over at the dogs, who were all out cold.

“Yeah, less thinking happens when I’m tired.” Jake’s fingers twitched at his sides. He shivered slightly, the air in the room hitting his bare skin and sending a wave of goosebumps over his midsection and extremities.

“What are you thinking about?” Sam closed the distance between them and Jake glanced down to her still clothed form. He brought his hands up, placing them at her hips, his thumbs rubbing over the soft padding over the bones.

“Nothing that I want to be thinking about.” He murmured, his hands traveling up her sides, across her breasts. He pressed his thumbs over where her nipples would be and blinked slowly. Sam watched a sly smile crept across his lips, his gaze then settling upon hers. Half lidded green met mahogany brown, fire crossing the line of sight between them.

“Tell me?” She pleaded tenderly, hesitantly placing her hands on his taut abs. He gasped sharply, the warmth of her fingers surprising on his cooled skin. Jake’s eyes lowered as his fingers tugged the straps of her dress down her shoulders.

“I don’t wanna think about it.” He whispered, casually pulling the dress down over her breasts, unhooking the clasp of her bra, guiding it all off her body and onto the floor. Everything fell to the floor with a soft thud.

“I’m not asking you to think about it. I’m asking you to...”

“Let you in. I know. I’m...just...give me a minute.” There was a rasp to his voice, an edge like a razor, cutting through the quiet and slow intake of breath between them. His eyes flicked down to her exposed breasts, one hand ghosting over her middle to cup one and run his thumb over the nipple. The rush of heat throughout Sam’s body, the flush and rosy color in her cheeks when he touched her was something Jake absolutely adored.

Sam leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, then let her mouth travel down to the bump across his collarbone. The callus that had formed over the broken part was still there and it would eventually shrink, but there was a stark contrast between the left and right sides for now. She kissed it and he winced. It didn’t hurt anymore but the memory of pain was still prevalent. She gave his tags a short tug, her gaze flicked to them.

“Jacob Alexander Seresin.” He sighed heavily, the whisper of his full name sending a spark through his loins, as Samantha’s hands trailed outward to the carefully sculpted and lean muscles of his obliques and then down, across his Adonis belt. She raised a brow and then sank to her knees.

Jake’s hands followed her, landing on her shoulders. He gathered her wavy brown locks and pulled it all into a fist. His growing erection ached, and he longed for her to give him relief.

“Tell me.” She commanded in the most gentle way possible, but as her beautiful fingers, her nails an emerald green, wrapped around his length for the first time that evening, he could only think of how much he wanted to obey. Of how badly he wanted to please her. She pressed her lips to the tip of his cock as she had the other night, but this was different. In front of him, on her knees, she was sure of herself. “What’s bothering you, handsome?”

“Fuck, Samantha. You look so good like this. God grant me some fuckin’ strength .” Jake’s tone was husky, his breathing already ragged, and she’d barely even touched him.

“Tell me what’s bothering you.” She said, licking a line on the underside of his cock, base to pretty, perfect, tip. He groaned in frustration.

“I...fuck...I....got upset when you...earlier...when you mentioned...”

“Kids...I know. I’m sorry.” Her apology split him in two. It was gentle and she took him in her mouth for a moment as her eyes flicked up to his.

“I forgive you.” He moaned. She hummed around him and then placed her wrapped hand closer to the base. She let his cock fall from her mouth then, asking him again. “What else?”

“Just...keep thinking about...capture.” He rasped, his other hand around the back of her neck.

“What about it?”

“How I wasn’t...wasn’t in...control...can’t...I can’t not...” He stuttered, stumbling over every word and thought as her lips met his hot and throbbing skin again.

“Yes you can. Let go and let me have you. I won’t hurt you, Jake.” She said, giving him a reassuring squeeze at the point of his hip.

“Can’t...lose...control.” Jake’s firm tone said one thing, but the unsteadiness with which his words left his lips said otherwise. He could lose it all to her.

“I’ve got you. All of you, remember? Even the fucked up parts.” She took him fully in her mouth then, evening out her breathing, as his cock nearly touched the back of her throat. Jake couldn’t help how his grip on her tightened. He couldn’t help his hips as they moved, thrusting into her mouth, causing her to draw back, nearly choking on him. Suddenly, his composure snapped back into place, his eyes darting to her. She dug her nails into his hip, eyes closed. He was about to ask her if she was okay when she inhaled sharply through her nose and took him deeper into her mouth again. He threw his head back and cursed, the feeling of her hot mouth wrapped around him almost too much. He reached down, placing his fingers just under her throat, helping her relax it, his thumb caressing her jaw as her cheeks hollowed and she sucked hard.

“ Good. Fucking. Girl .” He groaned, pressing his thumb into her skin as he felt his resolve fizzle out. He couldn’t help the sounds he made as he pumped his load down her throat. He couldn’t help the emotions that bubbled to the surface as he glanced down, seeing tears streaming down her cheeks as she took everything he gave her. He couldn’t help the pull he had on her hair, when her nails scraped his skin, and they both stilled. As his cock softened, and she let him drop from her mouth, she kissed the tip once more and then rose to her feet. Jake reached up and wiped the tears. “Too good, Sam...you’re too good to do that to yourself for me.”

“I wanted it. I want something else too.” She said, taking his hand. She guided him to the bed, and he crawled over the top of her, his tags jingling as he went. She spread her legs of her own accord,a d hooked them around his waist. His gaze was tired on her, and he took a deep breath and let it out through pursed lips. Her fingers traced lines over the vasculature on his arms as they headed toward his neck. At the base, she tangled her fingers in his short hair, pricking his skin with her nails. His cock twitched, blood flow returning rapidly as his arousal picked up again. It wasn’t hard to get him going. Sam did it well, and she knew exactly what got him there. He pressed his hips toward her, rubbing his half-hard cock against her wetness. Wet...was an understatement. She was dripping.

“So ready for me.” He mused, a smirk crossing his lips as he began to assault her neck with his lips. She was dangling on the edge of her pleasure already and she could tip over it at any moment with Jake above her. He continued grinding against her, cock returning to its full glory in mere minutes.

“I’m always ready for you, Jake. I’ve always been. I’ve just been waiting for you.” She said, and her double entendre had Jake brimming with emotions that he couldn't quite place. She said it as if she’d been waiting her entire life for him, and maybe she had. Maybe he had been waiting for her too.

He was at full mast again, length hard and heavy against her stomach as he kissed across her collarbone. Her lips brushed against his cheek as his met her shoulder. His hands cupped her breasts, thumbs flicking across her nipples and sending a shiver through her. He took himself in hand, thrusting into her hard. Jake could never quite get over the feeling of her wrapped around him, squeezing him. As he stretched her, Sam moaned his name, the sound heavenly to his ears.

She pulled him close then and whispered in his ear, “Fuck me, Jake, please. Don’t you dare hold back.”

His knees locked her in on both sides, his hands on either side of her head, and he went to work. He didn’t bother starting slow. She didn’t want that. She wanted the unhinged fucking animal that she knew was in Jake. She wanted him in the state of mind that he’d been in when he was captured. When all he could think of was her. Wanting to get back home to her. She wanted him to let go.

“Hold. On. To. Me. Seriously.” He growled, causing Sam to intertwine her fingers at the back of his neck. The only sound in the room then was the loud slap of skin on skin, and Jake knew they would both be sore tomorrow. He rutted into her, absolutely fucking railed her, his groans loud as he hit the deepest parts of her with every single thrust. At the first thrust she felt pain shoot through her core, at the second she disconnected her fingers, and by the third, her nails were piercing the skin of his back, leaving deep scratches, valleys that marked him as hers and hers alone. She raked them across the strong musculature as he rammed his hips into hers. Jake felt her walls clench over and over and the sensation ripped a strangled howl of pleasure from him so loud that it alone sent Sam careening over the edge of her orgasm as well. She whimpered his name over and over, whining as her walls pulsed around him, eventually dissolving into wordless echoes of his name.

Jake’s body drained of every feeling, every emotion, every bit of tension as he emptied his load into Sam, settling his body over hers. His breathing was uneven, his chest heaving, sweat dripping from his neck and shaking pectorals. Sam at some point had lost her grip with the beads of sweat that had formed on his skin and her hands had fallen to the sheets, gripping them for dear life, when Jake’s thrusts became sloppy.

They stayed there for a few moments, before Jake was backing away, and pulling her toward the shower. He turned the water on and guided her under the hot stream, the temperature soothing and smoothing out the last bits of tension in both hers and Jake’s bodies. He wasn’t done though.

“You wanted this.” He purred, his breath hot near her ear. He nipped at the shell then kneed her legs apart as he pressed her against the cool tile. He bit down on her shoulder as he thrust up into her. She hadn;t even realized he was hard again until then, until he was in her space, invading her air, caging her in with his strong musk.

“I know. I want you. I want it, Jake. Please, keep going. Keep fucking me. Fucking stay inside me forever. Fuck me forever, oh my god.” Her words fueled him, as he left teeth marks on her shoulder, hickeys on her neck, and reddened skin on her ass as he pulled out and flipped her around, smacking her bottom as he pushed himself inside her from behind. He gathered her hands above her head, against the wall, keeping them joined at the wrists. His other hand was firmly around her middle, steadying her, making sure she couldn’t move. Making sure that he could just fill her over and over and she couldn’t escape, and she’d never want to anyway.

“Jake, Jake, Jake!” She saw stars, as another orgasm washed over her. It had been there, creeping up behind her and pushing her over the edge without her even realizing it. Jake was not far behind, his balls drawing up tight, cock pumping, painting her inner walls again. Jake was absolutely spent, exhausted, as his length fell from her. His thighs were shaking, his body trembling behind her. Sam’s was damn near the same, tension gone. Everything in their bodies was dull, ache-less, and relaxed as she turned to him.

Jake’s lips met Sam’s in the most gentle touch, more than a brush of the lips, but less than a full kiss. Jake recoiled slightly to examine his fiance, and what he saw was stunning. His girl, his woman, fucked out, and filled to the brim, with happiness. Her smile was wide, lids lowered, breath easy. He cupped her cheeks and kissed her, feeling the devotion pass between them.

“Now you know.” Sam whispered, barely audible over the water running. Jake’s brow furrowed.

“Know what?” He asked, his thumbs caressing her cheekbones. Her fingers had met his chest, toying with the sparse golden hair there.

“That you can let go. You can lose control and I will still be okay.” She said softly, closing the distance between them once more.

“Are you okay? Was I too...?” His voice was unsteady as his hands connected with her waist. She leaned into him, against his chest and sighed deeply. Her words came out reassuringly, putting him at ease.

“I'm fine, Jake. You didn't hurt me. I like knowing that you can go there with me. I trust you.”

“And I trust you...to take over...when I can give up control. It’s not often...but knowing that I can let go...really let go...it means more than you will ever know...and so much more than I will ever be able to express...” Jake closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of Sam’s warm body curled into him, under the stream of hot water. They stayed there for a long while, soaking in each other’s quiet presence.

#glen powell #jake hangman seresin #jake seresin #jake seresin x oc #top gun maverick #top gun fanfiction #top gun hangman #Spotify

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nativeofsumeru · 22 hours ago

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Honkai: Star Rail Fanfiction Story ideas (Part 1/?)

A/N: I made so many for Genshin, might as well make my list for HSR. Also, these are pretty much all "x reader". They are in no particular order. Basically piles of stories I don't believe I have the time or skill to write. If someone does make it, tag me cause I'd love to read it! ~~ (not proofread) Moze x reader -Xianzhou Trailblaze continuance quest, the one with Hoolay -Foxian!reader -reader used to be a slave of some sort to the borisin before running away with Feixiao -reader is Feixiao's friend and proxy/representative/diplomat or something of that sort, helping out with paperwork and other minor General related duties whilst Feixiao deals with the important stuff -Moze and reader get together prior to trailblaze continuance -Moze can be soft and awkward in private, but takes his job and professionalism very seriously, especially when his job this protecting his s/o -therefore reader and Moze are professional when they're in work -reader is sent to oversee the current state, details, and conditions of Hoolay's imprisonment in the Luofu Shackling Prison for Feixiao with Jiaoqiu and Moze -reader tries to escape to get help during the prison break, gets grabbed by a borisin and used as momentary leverage or something -reader and Jiaoqiu tell Moze to go (he leaves reader behind reluctantly) -reader and Jiaoqiu are the ones taken hostage -maybe Hoolay taunts Moze with reader as the Shackling Prison doors close (so close to save yet so far away) -idk maybe Moze goes through all the angst and self blame and having the sole job of protecting reader yet failing and leaving them to be back in the clutches of the creatures who abused them centuries ago -Feixiao has to convince him not to do anything stupid -when Moze finds reader again, screw Jiaoqiu, s/o is the priority -maybe Jiaoqiu is aware and is like "yea, please save them" -Moze is likely successful, but both probably get injured -reader either joins the fight (much to Moze's chagrin) or is insisted to a hospital (which Moze would probably prefer lol) -reunion scene, return to Yaoqing, Moze and reader kinda heal from all the trauma together -lots of fluff and/or cuddles when they get home -Moze opening up a little how scared he was to potentially lose reader

Jiaoqiu x reader -also based off the Hoolay quests -foxian!reader or human!reader -reader works with him, Moze, and Feixiao -perhaps they're engaged or married at this point -they both end up being taken hostage by the borisin -insert Jiaoqiu trying to do whatever he can to take the brunt of the borisin's assualts and taunts -if foxian!reader, him holding them and trying to shield them away from seeing the foxian man being attacked by Hoolay and turned into a borisin -if human!reader, reader trying to silently comfort him as the foxian man is being attacked and transformed before them -reader is able to escape, but Jiaoqiu is tragically unable to in time -reunion at the hospital where they make the discovery that Jiaoqiu is now blind -back home on the Yaoqing, life is more difficult for Jiaoqiu -reader has time off of work and reader tries to help Jiaoqiu nagivate life again without his sight -it's definitely a hindrance to him in some cases, especially when it comes to making his delicious elaborate meals, but he insists that he's just happy reader got away safe and unscathed and that he'd gladly do it all over again for them

Tingyun/Fugue x reader -I have not yet done her Fugue story quests yet, but I absolutely adore Tingyun/Fugue -foxian!reader (cause long life) -loved and lived with Tingyun for years prior to the Trailblaze quests -reader witnessed a shift in her at one point, but no one else seemed to notice it all that much -this person looks like Tingyun, sounds like Tingyun, acts like Tingyun, but something in the back of their mind tells them that this is not their Tingyun -they witness the neck snap and reveal of Phantylia -angst as they realize that their love may very well no longer be alive -starskiff funeral and returning to the now empty home with no Tingyun -grief of having to face the reality that she is very likely dead, coping with trauma of essentially "seeing her die" right in front of them, and the realization that they've basically been living with an imposter for who knowns how long -(time skip) -reader is only slightly beginning to accept and move on with life, but Tingyun's memory is never faded in their mind -then, she's there, standing before them -"You're just as beautiful as the day I lost you" moment -option 1: Fugue does not remember them, reader is understandably heartbroken and the grieving comes in another heavy wave, insert reader trying to be nice and helping and respecting her boundaries whilst also pushing aside the feeling of embracing her and rejoicing her return, angst route leads to Fugue being grateful for the effort but saying she'd rather not build the relationship further and they go their separate ways, happy route leads to Fugue falling for reader again slowly over time with their relationship somewhat stronger than before -option 2: reader and Fugue work through repairing old memories and catching up on lost time, reader helps her navigate life once more whilst she's healing from everything she went through -reader has to figure out how to handle the fact that the person they love is somewhat of a different person now

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yoru-exe · 4 months ago

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awww it's been too long since i participated in tag games, thank you so much for the tag kiki!! 𖹭

last song i listened to: muteki by young kee

favourite colour: beige

last book i read: the last days of rabbit hayes by anna mcpartin

last tv show i watched: sonic x

sweet/spicy/savory: all, depending on my mood. sweet when i'm bored & savory when i'm hungry

relationship status: single but not ready to mingle because life's keeping me too busy for any other commitment

last thing i googled: izumi bridge (i saw its footage in an insta reel and i have to find out what it's called)

current obsession: SUZURI SHUHEI + japanese literature

looking forward to: switching job & completing my postgraduate study

no pressure & honorary tag: @kyuujo, @weareundead + you!

10 people i’d like to get to know better

tagged by @bubonicbabybell <3

Last song: meat is murder by the smiths

favorite color: orange 🍊

last book i finished: bliss montage

last tv show i watched: supernatural (s12)

sweet/spicy/savory: savory? i honestly dont have a preference

relationship status: single

last thing i googled: stardew valley wiki 💀

current obsession: dead poets society + the sims 4

looking forward to: halloween! and nanowrimo

tagging > @laceyc0bwebs @thelifeofagirl @chiiiiiiiiiiiiiii (i have no other mutuals and am lowkey scared to tag people i follow so sorry this is supposed to be 10)

#awww i love this game so much #seriously please tag me more into these!!#kiki your relationship status tho 💀#ify #yoru's letter

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tubbytarchia · 1 year ago

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Sorry, last one, swear!! I'll try and finish this by the 10th and then I will leave you all alone. I'm experiencing some long missed joy in creating this, please forgive my impatient excitement

#Just need this to be done already but its not so I just need to share one last bit of it to keep myself motivated. Please understand #Mercy... Thank you for all the support though but I'll express more of that at the end of this #scarian #desert duo #trafficshipping #trafficblr #those pink forest backgrounds are like the only ones I remotely like in this entire animation #but I'll try to redo and improve some of the others before I dare show them to the public eye. My backgrounds suck ass #seriously though wahhh I am so miserable but alas... the joy of creation #sorry for speaking like this is my magnum opus and everyone needs to look at it. I just dont know when I'll ever create smth like this agai #to me this means a lot #too many tags #tubby art

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star-lights-up · 28 days ago

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i was rewatching the first class mutant-finding montage

and i noticed

he's chewing something in this shot???

sir. what are you doing. 🤨

more importantly what snacks are you eating on this road trip.

Erik with a bag of potato chips. in prison. adopting alex. with his husband. what a vibe.

(charles is judging him.)

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sulfuranimations · 7 months ago

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heyyy my little tumblr scrimblos, this cut of the animation is finished :3 I still got a long way to go before the whole four and a quarter minutes is complete, but for now, enjoy this eight second snippet. I worked super hard, and am unbelievable proud of the end result. (also it's my birthday (28th July) wish me a good one pretty please <3)

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sapphireswimming · 1 month ago

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we get it you watched a movie

ah you must be new here!

welcome to tumblr:

#sorry. i'm having a bad day so you get the snippy tags #but you don't like the fact that i reblogged things?#on the reblogging things website?#when they were all properly and consistently tagged so you could filter or blacklist them out #via tumblr or xkit or tumblr savior or whatever your blacklisting function of choice is?#yeah i watched a movie #i regularly binge blog about most of the stuff i watch #often it's just spread out over a 1000 post long queue so they don't all spit out at once #but yesterday was the in-universe date that humanity cancelled the apocalypse #so you got like 75 posts about it in a row on the day of #if you didn't want to see any but didn't filter them out after you saw the second one on your dash that's on you friend #also. if you don't like what i post on my own blog #or the fact that i routinely hit post limit when i'm online and not just letting the queue run on auto #just unfollow me #go find other things that you like more #like seriously. please. hit the unfollow button #it takes less time and effort than coming into my ask box #and it will make both of our lives better #replies #anonymous #ss

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chericheribaby · 1 month ago

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ten series in gifs 🕺🕺

I don’t know if anyone has created this tag game yet but since there is one with movies I’m making one with tv shows/series because I’m a big series watcher so here it is!!

Abbott Elementary // Agatha All Along // Heartstopper // Anne With An E // Derry Girls // One Day At A Time // Percy Jackson And The Olympians // Good Omens // Sherlock // The Good Place

np tags: @deermessrs @kaaaaaaarf @moongays @fruityindividual @rae-lune @blossoms-and-possums @lavenderhaze @whorerific @annori @residentrookie @static-radio-ao3 @ecstarry @velanavis @belleandsaintsebastian @calamitoustide @emlovessid @angel-daydreams @moonheavens @aeoneskova @boydykepdf and OPEN TAG IM TAGGING LITERALLY ALL OF MY MUTUALS ‼️

#I limited myself to only 20 tags to show some restraint but I wanted to tag y’all however please please use the open tag seriously.#I mean it!!! please tag me so i can see!!!#so many good series didn’t make it to the list #shout out to B99 YR ATLA OFMD OMITB BLUEY TUA ST NNVAE and SO many more.....#tho NNVAE didn’t make it only because I couldn’t find a gif set which—Criminal #anyway yayyy tag game!! it took me so long to make this so be warned #loops plays a game #gif

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rip-headphones-users · 5 months ago

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My Headcannons for how Infected and Kasper operate

Buckle up, this is a long post. Thinking about how characters function in relation to the world around them is basically a hobby of mine, so expect more. (I have others planned for both lampert and unpleasant at the very least)

(Not ship related) (angst heavy sorry)

Kasper’s infection is a brain-rooted/cognito-hazardous parasite

He got it after purposely ignoring a chainmail curse, both as a sort of “fuck around and find out” as well as an outright form of self-harm/self-sabotage.

The parasite is the one that primarily controls all the conscious actions of infected, while kasper now acts sub-consciously.

Its less of a split-mind situation and more of a Venom + Eddie or Gundam + Pilot situation they are two separate entities inhabiting the same body that can potentially act at the same time

It just so happens that the parasite from the chainmail curse has VERY similar desires/interests/motivations to Kasper, so the host/parasite relationship actually works very well.

Infected accidentally makes Kasper lose a decent chunk of weight after it takes over, due to it not being able to feel when Kasper is hungry and forgetting to let him eat

Kasper and Infected can be addressed separately (Lampert, UnpleasantGradient, Folly and maybe a few others know this) and Kasper tends to choose not to respond due to his own apathy, instead opting to let Infected take the lead.

Being able to respawn/no permadeath on the regretevator is the reason why Kasper opted to infect himself, as he saw it as the next closest thing to death/suicide.

Allowing infected to enter his mind has radically reduced Kasper’s lifespan. (He’d be lucky if he made it to his late 30’s)

His nose bleeds when Kasper and infected try to act at the same time

Infected is only transferrable via chainmail

Infected doesn’t feel any of the bodily necessities that kasper has, so its not uncommon for him to collapse of exhaustion, dehydration, hunger, ect. If someone doesn’t remind him.

Infected doesnt feel pain either

Kasper feels it though. A lot.

In fact the whole process of infected entering his mind was incredibly painful as is.

Infected isn’t the reason why things in the elevator/on his own body suddenly lose their texture, neither of them know why that happens now.

They personally aren’t physically effected by it and both find it cool, so neither are bothered.

It’s probably just the result of infected’s malware (thats only technically supposed to effect machines) managing to attach itself to a human. Or maybe Kasper could do that and never previously knew. Who knows. ;)

Kasper/infected can phase through objects that are textureless, including parts of his own body. Anything else will collide as it normally would, and take damage.

Infected will always talk with full leetspeak, (L13k D1$) while Kasper will only have one letter/number substitution (L1ke Th1s)

UG unintentionally named infected that. Basically just looked at Kasper, who had just let a parasite into his mind, and looked at the chainmail virus on his computer, and it went “huh… Bro’s Infected”

Bro is, in fact, infected.

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catboypines · 5 months ago

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hey guys if i see another billdip vs billford poll i might ram my fist through my head <3 in fact can we stop with the comparison altogether lol. CLEARLY theyre the same but also completely different we’ve all elaborated enough on that. idc which one u like they both equally suck because bill is the worst. now lets go back to making whichever one we like better (for some weird unknowable reasons) kiss in our heads and go about our day. PLEASE

#billdip #not tagging the other ones cuz theyre mean to us #but listen i truly dont care. canon not canon WHO CARESSSSS ITS A FUCKING TRIANGLE #’its pedophilia’ please go outside for once in ur life genuinely im worried about u #i think we should worry less about which ship is better and more about what shipping either says about our mental state #im betting 90% of us grew up with a narcissistic parent LMAO #ok enough diagnosing i wont waste my degree here #but seriously excuse my harsh tone this is all in good fun #i like making fun of how absurd this is #tldr we all need therapy and also our favorite ship is based #i am a billdip tho for life theyre my bread and butter and if u dont understand Well. u just werent meant to. but trust me its glorious #i wish u could get it #canon is as real as these characters are. meaning its not

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butterflysonnets · 1 year ago

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yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.

to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!

i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.

also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.

they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.

they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.

i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.

#eve text #elmike #stranger things #byler #only tagging byler because i feel like yall will like this take lol #tagging tagging tagging WHAT ARE EVERYONE ELSE'S THOUGHTS #god i can't believe i'm making a post about stranger things. this feels like poking a bear #i'm not particularly anti m*leven but like... they'd have to do something pretty special at this point for me to feel like it's viable #i'm seeing the bts of s5 and it's got me Having Thoughts #elmike friendship is something i am so passionate about #even before i ever liked byler (didn't ship at all until s4 even though i knew it was a thing before) i've felt this way about elmike #i always believed they were close friends at heart and needed to break up #the romance part of them felt very distinctly young and very much “he was a boy she was a girl” to me #and it hasn't deepened into anything more mature and i don't see how it could based on the current state of the writing...#the fact that lumax exists — a young relationship that is actively maturing and is healthy — makes that clear to me #and the “love confession” in s4 and how disingenuous and miserable it felt was just the nail in the coffin #also the fact that will (who is IN LOVE with mike) was instrumental in making it happen? ... uh... okay... interesting choice…#fucked up and reductive if they make it another queer unrequited love sacrifice for the sake of pushing the heterosexual agenda YUCK #so i really hope the speculation about a m*leven breakup is real!! i think it just makes sense for their characters but who knows #i don't believe in the notion of love at first sight or one true love and i think the writers don't too???#love to me is an accumulation of experiences and we inevitably choose it at some point rather than fall into it... but idk #tv is so fixated on keeping couples together... sometimes it's just not reality guys especially with young people... LET IT GO...#like i said though i'm not 100% sold that they're going to give up their “golden couple” LMAO #stranger things hasn't historically subverted too many tropes if i'm being honest #anyway i seriously need this season to come out quickly... i'm so bored and getting my master's is crushing my soul #i need frivolity #ALSO btw i won't respond to hateful messages about this so please don't bother. it's not that serious. this is a netflix show

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snkyou · 2 months ago

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Drabble Prompt: Post-canon Levi, struggling with chronic pain and mourning his dead loved ones, being visited by his still alive loved ones

Anon, you knew how to talk pretty to me <3

hihi requests are still open btw

I feel like I gotta put a disclaimer or something lmao. So, the length of my drabble requests is usually something between 100-400 words. This request is just an incredibly unexpected exception. it just happened to fit into this idea I already had been thinking of, which was how the remaining 104th would ask Levi to be part of important events in their lives because well, they like the dude lmao, so expect that sort of one-shot soon. Additionally, since I kept reminding myself that this was supposed to be a drabble, I might have glossed over the chronic pain and mourning bits so I'm sorry about that ;;

that being said, 2.4k words of Levi and Gabi be upon ye <3

Now on Ao3!

The angry hissing of the kettle makes him flinch. It brings a loud ringing to his right ear. Instinctively, he places his right hand over it, and gives his ear a couple of gentle taps; it's more of a grounding gesture, a distraction from the buzzing. He usually keeps watch over the kettle, so that he can lower the heat just right before it gets a chance to scream at him.

He realises then that he must have spaced out while waiting. It’s alright, he thinks. It’s been like that a lot, recently. He’s been like that. Lost in thought-- lost in time, if he allowed himself to be precise. The last days, weeks even, as the temperatures started to drop, blended into each other. There’s a little calendar on his bedside table, it had been a birthday gift from Armin – or had that been Mikasa’s? He isn’t sure, he had received an absurd number of presents from the kids last year, it had been hard to keep track of who gave him what and now the fact escaped him. Turning the pages of the little calendar, with its delicate botanical illustrations on each day, quickly became part of his morning routine, and so he was sure that time was passing at all. The stillness of the routine, he guesses, made him like this.

His vision blurs momentarily while he scoops the tea leaves into the teapot. He squints, trying to will his good eye to focus, but all he gets in return is a throb in his right eye. After putting the tea canister away, he presses the inner sides of his wrists to both eyes, placing just enough pressure to relieve the discomfort. When he opens his eyes again, he is pleased to find he can read the small print on the canister an arm’s length away.

There’s a loud slam coming from the front of the house, followed by footsteps coming further into the house.

He quickly recognizes the heavy stomping as Gabi’s gait. She’s always been so loud.

Gabi crosses the arch into the small kitchen and dining area.

“Don’t slam my doors,” he says as a greeting, slowly turning his head to his left side, trying to catch a glimpse of her in his periphery.

“Aye, aye,” the kid waves her hand, shoots him a teasing grin, “someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.”

Levi hums in response but doesn’t say anything else. He busies himself with placing everything they need for their morning tea and coffee on a metal tray on the counter, which Gabi takes from him as soon as it’s ready and sets it on the table.

He grabs his cane from where he had hooked it on one of the kitchen drawers. He has been leaning against the counter, his right leg supporting most of his weight all this time. He braces himself for the sharp pain that will surely surge from his bad knee, through his left hip and up his spine. Cold mornings like this one and being still in one place for long will do that to him. It’s not so bad. It could be worse.

It takes 4 steps to get from the stove to his chair, which Gabi has already pulled out for him. It sits at an angle that allows him to easily slide down on it and rest his right elbow on top of the table, leaning back and against his good side.

“I have something that will cheer you up,” she holds a couple of envelopes in her hand and waves them at him, “You’ve got mail!”

He nods at her in acknowledgement but does not take his attention away from preparing his first batch of tea of the day. There’s a ritual to it, it almost feels like, and he doesn’t want to mess it up. Not when the ringing in his ear is still there, the building pressure in the upper back part of his eyeballs, and the cold air seeping into his bones through his thick jumper. Oh, how he needs a good cup of tea right now.

While Levi waits for it to steep, he grabs the papers that she had shoved in his face, squints his eyes at the first envelope and finds that he is unable to make out much of the handwriting. He brings it closer to his face, squints harder, steals a quick glance across the table and hopes Gabi isn’t paying him any mind, too preoccupied with choosing from the bag of pastries she brought with her. It is with an impassive expression that he hands the stack of envelopes back.

“Read it for me.” A beat and then he adds, a little reluctant: “Please.”

He knows Gabi prefers coffee in the mornings, and black tea in the evenings, so he makes sure to have a fresh brew of the former whenever he knows she’s coming over; so, with shaky hands, Levi gets to prepare her cup of coffee. While he enjoys the aroma of it, he remains faithful to tea; at first, he thought he didn’t like it because he had butchered his first attempts at brewing it. But even after Onyankopon had taught him how to do it properly and he had enjoyed his cup, it didn’t bring the same comfort as tea. It just never hit the spot.

She shoots him a mischievous grin, “Oh, you sure? What if I read something personal, hm?”

Levi just shakes his head, scoffing at the idea of Gabi finding his junk mail fascinating.

“Is this how I find out you have a secret lover you’re exchanging raunchy love letters with?” Gabi teases, wiggling her eyebrows at him.

He lets out a tired sigh and rolls his eyes, “just wanna be done with it, ” he stirs the milk into Gabi’s coffee, which now has turned into a cup of milk with coffee. “We have a lot to prepare for tonight.”

She clicks her tongue at him, but still rips the first envelope open, “Mr. Levi, your reading won’t improve if you keep doing that,” she jokingly scolds him.

Although Levi mentally recognises handing her and Falco stuff he couldn’t be bothered reading before, that’s not the case this time. He’ll let her think that for now, though, because he doesn’t want to mention the pressure building in the back of his bad eye, it’s not important and she, a kid, doesn’t need to know his newly found ailment of the week. He can see just fine around him right now. He can see Gabi’s big eyes and playful smile at the other side of the table, and that’s good enough; smaller details, he doesn’t feel he can do them, not without making himself go dizzy with a migraine.

Levi slides the cup of coffee to her and is pleased with himself when she approves of the colour of her drink.

“It’s from Armin,” she announces as she scans the letter.

From this angle, the soft morning light illuminating her face and thanks to his faulty vision, Gabi’s image stirs his memory. His heart faintly constricts as he is reminded of the many times Hange read their research reports to him during breakfast in the mess hall before presenting them to Erwin. Levi always wondered how they could read so fast, sometimes he even doubted they were actually reading at all, their words barely being able to catch up with her eyes; he never asked about it, maybe reading came easy to them as numbers did to him.

A high-pitched squeal from Gabi startles him, bringing him back to the here and now.

“Oh… ohh, Mr. Levi,” she starts, her smile widening by the second “This is good news!”

Gabi makes a show of clearing her throat and then starts reading “Dear Captain, I hope this letter finds you well and in good health.”

Levi can’t help but let a sardonic huff at the irony of the greetings but doesn’t let himself be bothered by it. He has written only a handful of personal letters throughout his life, and by now he knows it’s just something you’re supposed to say because jumping straight to the point isn’t acceptable, or so that’s what he had been told.

Gabi continues reading Armin’s words to him. For the most part, it’s a standard letter coming from him: he asks Levi how he’s dealing with the changing of the seasons, how Gabi and Falco are faring, if business at the tea shop has been good, if there’s anything Levi needs that he can’t get in town so that Armin or the others can get it for him. He tells him a little about the country he’s writing from, he even includes a photograph. Then, after the expected pleasantries, Gabi can barely hold her excitement and starts reading faster, trying so hard not to trip over her words.

“If I’m being sincere, we would prefer to ask you in person,” Gabi stops for a second to look up at him from the paper, gauging for a reaction and finding nothing, she continues.

Armin apologises for not being able to visit him before the holidays, Annie included, and so it is implied that he won’t be attending tonight’s reunion.

Sometime during the last five years, the Alliance brats had decided to make showing up at Levi’s doorstep together once a year a sort of custom; the first time it happened was during an early winter, a blizzard had stopped them from leaving Levi’s until the next morning. It had been a really nice evening despite the awful weather, Levi remembers, after everyone pitched in one way or another, they all shared a simple but hearty meal together. It was Connie who jokingly said they should do it every year. The following year, Onyankopon, Gabi and Falco joined them.

This year would be their fourth, and the first someone wouldn’t make it. That fact sits heavily in Levi’s chest, stealing the spotlight from his throbbing eye.

“...Annie and I have decided to get married. The both of us would like you to officiate our ceremony!” unable to contain her excitement, she tears her eyes away from the paper and looks at Levi. “Huh?! This is good news! What’s with the constipated face?!”

That doesn’t sound right. It figures that Annie and Armin would be the first to marry; in a way, he is happy for them, they clearly care for each other. No, that part is easy to understand. Their union is logical to anyone who knows the couple. What Levi can’t figure out is why they are asking him such a thing.

He clears his throat, assumes it’s been 3 minutes and his tea is ready to be poured and so he distracts himself with that.

When he doesn’t answer Gabi, she picks up where she left off.

He isn’t… well, he isn’t that close to either of them. He’s sure Annie must have other relatives that could step in his stead. Maybe a brother, a cousin. Even Jean or Reiner would be better options than Levi. He isn’t good with words or people like they are, he couldn’t possibly give them a speech about something foreign to him as it is that kind of love, that’s what people expect, right? His title of Captain is obsolete in this new world, so it can’t be that either. Hell, he has never been to a fucking wedding.

Just… why him?

As expected, Armin doesn’t really go into the details of their choice but does let Levi know they do not expect a fast answer and that they do not want him to feel pressured to accept it, despite how much it would mean to them if he did. Armin asks if there’s anything in particular that he would like for his birthday, as it is a month away, and closes the letter by saying he looks forward to seeing him and everyone then.

When the letter is closed and put back into its envelope, silence falls around them. For a moment the only sound that can be heard is the clinking of tableware as Levi places the teacup back on its saucer.

It bothers him, that he knows he will be letting Armin down by refusing something that any other well-adapted person would consider an honour. But the thought of embarrassing him and himself, because he gave an awkward, most likely insensitive, speech, mortifies him. No, he can’t put them and their guests through that. He will find a way to make it up to the couple, maybe he can… he doesn’t know yet, but he will come up with something.

As he finishes his first cup, Levi realises that at some point while he was lost in thought, the ringing in his ear has subsided and now it’s back to that muffled, cotton-in-ear sensation he’s used to and he doesn’t feel his eyeball pulsating anymore. Glancing at Gabi, he notices she is trying really hard not to say something, her brow furrowed as she takes a sip of her own drink, followed by a big bite of her pastry. Flakes stick to the corner of her mouth and for once it doesn’t disgust him. Instead, it makes his lips twitch as if going into a smile.

“I can help you... if you want,” she says eventually, sounding uncharacteristically careful and small of her.

Levi quirks an eyebrow “Help? with what?”

She shrugs, “How to… tell them you don’t want to,” she avoids looking at him for the first time, finding the flakes on her plate more interesting. She shrugs again and tilts her head to the side, a thin line of a smile appearing on her face. “...or prepare for the ceremony.”

Not unlike many times before, Gabi’s words render him speechless, if only for a moment. He spares his tea a glance and he thinks: it’s bold of her to be so upfront about offering her help to him, and had it been any other morning, one where he couldn’t think past the constant ache in his body, he would’ve chewed her head off for simply trying to help him because he himself doesn’t know how to accept that kindness.

This kid is trying her best and he can’t help but feel somewhat proud of that.

“You have shit on your face. Here,” he points to where the flakes would sit on his own face and picks his refilled teacup back up.

Gabi quickly wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, getting most of the flakes off. Levi gives her a thumbs-up with his free hand.

“I’ll think about it,” he finally concedes and tries to ignore the little happy dance she does in her seat.

This time, when the amber liquid touches his lips, it’s remarkably sweeter than before.

#drabble request #aot #snk #levi #levi ackerman #gabi braun #gabi #post-war levi #armin mentioned lmao #please tell me which tags to add so that all my fellow post war levi enthusiast find this aaaaa #Girl dad levi you'll always be famous #second disclaimer english isn't my first language and I haven't written seriously in well over a year #I am like really nervous about posting this one ngl lads #but we persevere like the captain #no beta just me myself and I and like 2 hours of screaming I hate proof-reading but like I'm too self-conscious to just let it be #spoilers in the next tag >>#third disclaimer: iirc the whole captain officiating marriages isn't real but this is fiction and I do what I want #and I just think it would be cute if levi accepted even if for just a symbolic ceremony and not the real-deal yk?!#how to get rid of your chronic pain by levi; just overwhelm yourself by overthinking social scenarios #anywusssyyy let me know your thoughts #I'll probably post this on ao3 because it do be a decent length for it #we'll see #okay byeeeee #i hope you enjoy it anon and thank you for your patience I'm placing a big smooch on your forehead tysm fo sending such an exquisite prompt #I forgot to put the read more like the fool I am #if you saw the original post no u didn't <3

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