#seriously fuck eric adams

[theprogressivesadist]

[bulletfragment]

Random facts about columbine (Repost)

* If Eric could change one thing about himself it would be his weight

* When Dylan was a sophomore, he volunteered at a day care. sue remembers him helping little kids line up neatly to take their turns on the swing

* Eric and Dylan's manager had a six year old daughter who was often there while they worked. She loved them and their manager said they treated her very well.

* When one of eric's neighbours lost her puppy, he looked for it and brought it back to her

* Eric would help his mom garden

* Eric and Dylan went to two rammstein concerts together. they were on december 8th, 1997 and may

* 1st, 1998. KMFDM opened for the first one.

* Dylan used the the Breman Bold font for his wrath shirt.
We're unsure what Eric used but it could potentially be
Massacre.
Dylan picked out his cat, rocky, from a litter of kittens when he was in 3rd grade

* Dylan's favorite baseball player was Roger Clemens

* At blackjack, Eric made $7.65 an hour and Dylan made $6.50 an hour

* Eric had $113 in his wallet at the time of his death

* For his english class, Eric chose these three books to read and write an essay about. Return from the stars was his favorite one.

* According to a Jennifer Harmon, a girl in Eric and Dylan's creative writing class, Dylan would pass out chips ahoy cookies during this class as an attempt to make friends. she said they were "the chewy kind with big chocolate chunks." During the basement tapes, Dylan pumped a shotgun and pointed it at Eric, who was filming, making him scream "jesus christ, put the fucking safety on!"

* During the massacre, Eric and Dylan had match strikers taped to their forearms so they could easily light their bombs. they are visible in this photo from the evidence exhibit. you can also see the tape on Dylan's wrist in the suicide photo.

* Eric and Dylan had other nicknames besides Reb and Vodka. Eric's were indigo, reverend, and war. Dylan's were green and death.
After they committed suicide, Eric had 18 9mm bullets and 14 shotguns shells left. Dylan had 3 9mm bullets and 14 shotgun shells left.

* On March 14, 1998, Dylan got a ticket for failing to stop at a red light. He had to go to court for it on april 29. he wrote, "red light court. dam ni**az better not take me license.

* Two months before columbine, Eric's dog was seriously ill. Dylan picked up Eric's shift at blackjack so he could stay home and be with his dog. Sue felt sad for Eric and told Dylan she was proud of him for being such a good friend.

* After the massacre, Kevin harris told friends he blamed himself because he went away to college and wasn't around to help his brother cope with whatever problems he was having.

* The morning after the massacre, Wayne Harris phoned the family dentist. Eric had an appointment on june 30th and he needed to cancel it.

* Eric was not Dylan's first choice for NBK. He originally wanted to do it by himself, with a girl, or with (presumably) Zack Heckler.

* Devon Adams said Sue wore Dylan's jeans after his death. The only person on their shitlists who got shot was

* Austin Eubanks. Austin was friends with Corey Depooter. He died in 2019 due to an opioid addiction.

* When Eric lived in Michigan, his dad was a scout leader and helped coach sports teams. he played basketball in their driveway with Eric and Kevin. His mom helped his 5th grade class make special shirts for halloween. Both his parents always attended the parent-teacher conferences

* A few weeks before the massacre, Dylan was banned from using the school computers because he called a librarian a bitch after she asked him to pay for printing over 10 pages. When told he was banned, he just said,
"well, you know, it doesn't matter. it doesn't matter."

* Dylan was friends with Rachel Scott's prom date, Nick Baumgart, between 3-5th and 7-8th grade (Eric was also friends with him 7-8th). In the basement tapes, Eric said he laughed too much and "those two girls sitting next to you probably want you to shut the fuck up too".

* Eric, Dylan, and Zach Heckler also targeted Nick's house during a Rebel Mission on February 7, 1997. Eric described what they did to his house and their reasoning for targeting him in his writings.

* Brandi Tinklenburg, the girl in the Eric In Columbine video, would study in the library every tuesday morning during her lunch hour. The only reason she wasn't there the day of the massacre was because she went to the tanning salon instead.

* The only reason cameras were installed in columbine's cafeteria was to catch students who left trash on the tables.

* Dylan's locker number was 837 and his combo was

* 19-37-9. And Eric's locker number was 624 and his combo was 16-48-30.

* V

* • Eric wrote "anniversary card" in his school planner under april 17, 1998 to remind himself to get his parents a card for their 28th wedding anniversary. When police arrived at Eric's house after the massacre and tried to go in his room, Kathy Harris tried to stop them. she said, "i don't want you to go in there." The officers persisted and she complied.

* Dylan's body was released to Horan & Mccontay funeral home. services were on april 24th, 1999 at 1:30pm.

8-10 people attended.

* Eric's body was released to aspen funeral home. No services were provided. It is unknown if the harris family had a private funeral for Eric or not.

* Eric got surgery to correct his pectus excavatum on December 16th 1993 at Fitzsimons Army Medical Centre in Aurora, co. He wrote, "when i got back from the hospital, i couldn't do anything that involved using my chest muscles. that meant i barely could even laugh."

* Dylan was going to major in computer science at the university of Arizona. Eric was almost positive he didn't want to go to a 4 year college, but he told a friend he might go to a 2 year college and "major in computer graphics or something."

* Eric knew he was rejected by the marines. Nate Dykeman said, "Dylan and I were the first ones Eric told about the rejection. He asked me, 'where do I go from there?' he saw it as a last option."

* Dylan's SAT score was 1210. He got 560 on the verbal part and 650 on the math part, putting him in the 75th percentile.

* During the massacre, eric or dylan (probably dylan) was heard saying, "today is the day the world comes to an end, today is the day we die," in the cafeteria. Eric and Dylan both dated the same girl, Sasha Jacobs.

* She went on 1-2 dates with Dylan and stopped because there was "something strange" about him. Then she went on 16-20 dates with Eric over a period of four months before also breaking up with him. After she broke up with him, Eric wrote in Chad Laughlin's yearbook about her. She also started to receive threats in her email which she suspected were from Eric.

* Eric's favorite magazines were Guns and Ammo, Penthouse, and Time.

* Dylan was born at the lutheran medical center in wheat ridge, co.

* Wayne Harris believed Brooks Brown was out to get Eric and that he was a "manipulative con artist." He wrote

"Eric is not at fault," him and Kathy felt victimized too, and they didn't want to be accused "everytime something supposedly happens."

* Eric scored a 46 on the marine recruitment asval test, which is an average score.

* Starting when he was 8 months old and until he was about 1 and a half years old, Eric went to the doctor at least 11 times due to a congenital leg problem. It wasn't elaborated on in his medical records, but his walk appears to have been bow-legged.

* Wilder Wien by RAMMSTEIN played in the original hitmen for hire during the scenes where Eric and Dylan were walking in their trench coats, but jeffco silenced the music (presumably) because of copyright.

* Mike Vendegnia (the guy in the white shirt in the Eric in columbine video) was friends with Corey Depooter.
Mike described Corey as "very bright and easy to get along with."

* Dylan tore off the bmw emblems on the front and back of his car. Zack Rissmiller said he did this, and after the massacre, police found the emblems in his glovebox. • A witness in the cafeteria heard Eric or Dylan yell

"check the window" and "one's coming in" as they were trying to detonate the bombs. They were likely anticipating that cops would enter the school at any second and were as shocked as everyone else was that they weren't coming.

* Eric's phone number was 303-762-1212.

* Dylan's phone number was 303-972-1131.

* Valeen Schnurr was holding hands with Lauren

* Townsend as she passed away.

* Dylan paid between $200 and $300 for his sunglasses.

* During the shooting, librarian Peggy Dodd told Brian Anderson, "i have to get out of here, they hate me, they're going to kill me." a few weeks before the massacre, Dylan called her a bitch when she asked him to pay for using the printer.

* Dylan told a classmate that the reason he wore a soviet pin on his boot was "just to get a reaction out of people.

* When Eric applied to tortilla wraps, he listed his english teacher, Mr. Webb, and Sue Klebold as references.

* One christmas, Sue fretted because Dylan wanted a collectible baseball card that cost as much as she had planned to spend on all his gifts. She worried about only having one gift under the tree. but that's what Dylan wanted, and that's all he got.

* Some of Dylan's favourite foods were scrambled egg, pizza, beef stew, lasagna, pumpkin pie spice cake and Dr Pepper as his favourite drink.

* Before Austin Eubanks left the library, he checked Corey Depooter for a pulse and detected no signs of life. Eric and Dylan threw a total of 31 bombs inside the library, but only 5 of them actually exploded.

* Neither Eric or Dylan wanted to have kids. Eric said, "i don't think i would want to bring a child into this world." Dylan said, "i'm never having kids. kids just mess up your life."

* A total of 76 bombs were found inside and outside columbine high school. Only 30 of those bombs actually exploded.

[spentgladiator]

Tinfoil hat doomthinking ahead....

I think the play the trump regime is going to try and make is going back to classifying transgenderism as a mental illness and involuntarily committing trans people to asylums. Not indefinitely as the tax dollars to fund this will dry up pretty quick, this government will absolutely run so afoul of any measured spending that there will not be much left by the end of it. I see this whole thing imploding possibly sooner than we think, the snake is already starting to gag on its tail.... Eric Adams mayor of NYC has already pushed the idea of using involuntary commitment albeit to the severely mentally unstable homeless population, and Facebook allowing transgenderism to be referred to as a "mental illness" in it's new TOS. This will go hand in hand with some horrible evil forced conversion therapy, (think along the lines of But I'm A Cheerleader, except much more evil) Uptake of such policies will probably be heavily dependent on red/blue states as many things are, though you cannot count on any state not flipping. It's also possible that enough outcry could be generated that it would stay their hand though this is doubtful.

Smart strategy for any and all queer people will be to scrub any trace of mental health struggles out of public eye and try and create a picture to the outside as one who is healthy, happy and functional as people who seem to "have it together" will be much more difficult targets, (though this taken with the very high comorbidity of being trans with severe mental illness is difficult to achieve)

As usual those with supportive friends and loved ones with resources or strong social standing will fare much better, as they will have advocates on the outside. I strongly recommend getting to know how the involuntary commitment process works in your state and how to fight/appeal and what your people on the outside can do before you go in. Get to know human Rights lawyers in your area, if you have any funds at all get one now. Seriously the wisest thing any of you could do is get a lawyer.

Start homebrewing estrogen, start getting your T from weird guys in gym locker rooms, and for fucks sake don't talk about any mental health struggles (or anything you're struggling with) with anyone who is legally mandated to hand your records over if subpoenaed. This is when the mental health world turns against us, they've never been for us. All the cutesy "get therapy" shit has lulled us into a false sense of security where our diagnoses and neuroses are now going to be used to justify some horrible treatment. Which I've been saying for years is a real risk but NO ONE LISTENTS TO RUSHIE 😔

Queer people have never needed "recognition" and "validation" from some outside source to be real. We have never needed the government to acknowledge us or stand up for us, that has always first and foremost been our duty to each other. We are legitimate, regardless of their views, we are legitimate and real and out here. It's scary but we need to stop depending on "daddy" to tell us that we're valid, I don't give a fuck if the government recognizes my existence or not and neither should you. I don't recognize their legitimacy.

Be smart, be safe, be there for the ones you love cause the rest of the world might not be for long.

[portraitofadumbassonfire]

Okay, So I finished S1 of Sex Education.....

More thoughts under (I watched this after seeing Barbie [2023] keep in mind.)

Adam's dad can fuck off. You hold your own child (and even Jackson who isn't related) to an unrealistic standard and get mad when they don't reach it. (Although I will say shout out to the casting director who got two actors who look so blood related despite not being the reality.)

Otis is a sweet but I wish he had more of an effort to support Eric on his birthday other than being down bad for a girl he ended up not being so smitten for as she (or I) thought.

Aimee is a total sweetheart and I'm glad she separated herself from that clique. (Granted I feel for Ruby, but seriously they were irking all 8 episodes.)

Ncuti you will ALWAYS be famous!!!!!!

Speaking of which.......I find the Eric x Adam dynamic interesting

This whole show without context gave me a relentlessly raunchy hollow take on Superbad, but this gave me more of the endearing quality of Fast Times at Ridgemont High & The Breakfast Club.

No wonder Greta Gerwig had a good chunk of the cast in Barbie.

[immobiliter]

       so i've been thinking about this post i made over the past few days and now i kinda want to talk about post s2 jackson, because his s3 arc isn't really explored in as much depth as i would have liked ( the curse of having too many characters ), but there are some interesting hints that we get here and there that i kinda want to flesh out

       the first and most obvious is that jackson has stopped wearing the letter jacket that he basically lived in for most of the first two seasons, which is the clearest sign that he has given up on the swim team ( as he promised at the end of s2 ) and is now a reformed ex-jock! we still see him in the boys changing rooms early on in s3 though ( even though sex education is sometimes very unclear about how much it is leaning on the american high school model and how much it is leaning on the british sixth form model, jackson is assumedly still taking PE as part of his curriculum ) and he does still have sway over the other boys that he enjoyed when he was the star of the moordale swim team. when adam & eric enter in ep 2 and adam is challenged about his sexuality, jackson does pipe up in an effort to ease the awkwardness that ensues. he is clearly still respected by his peers and is still popular, despite no longer being on the swim team. he's also still head boy, since hope summons him to her office very early on after taking over the school.

       when hope does go to find him in ep 2, jackson is in the rehearsal room with eric & the moordale swingers ( which comprises of swing band and the acapella group ). while he could have been there as head boy since the group were preparing to present to the rest of the group at assembly ( since fuck the pain away is changed to a song in latin instead halfway through the season, before reverting back during jackson & viv's takeover of hope's presentation ), and he is surprised at the song the group have picked, i did some sleuthing and the boy who leads the fuck the pain away acapella singalong is the same boy who plays mercutio in the school musical at the end of s2. lily is also there, and she directed the musical, and i think it's safe to assume that the majority of people there were in the musical in some role or other.

       while jackson isn't really seen there again and the rest of the season focuses on his dynamics with viv & cal, it is my personal headcanon that he does stay with swing band and the acapella group as an extracurricular activity that he is pursuing to replace swimming. he's not sure yet whether it is his calling, but in my jackson is just troy bolton but in a different font agenda, i like the idea of him hanging out with the music nerds and occupying this liminal space between the more "nerdy" uncool characters like lily & eric, and his jock friends who are still involved in sports. it's all the more reason why he feels very lost at this point and expresses it to cal early on, and also why he starts to take his head boy role more seriously too.

       whereas before it was just a means of popularity and status, through cal's mistreatment, jackson learns that he can and wants to stand up for what he believes in and what he feels is right. it's something he's already hinted at before — jackson is the best ally with his "it's my vagina" and "i also poo sometimes" solidarity lmao, but his and viv's takeover of hope's presentation and encouraging acceptance and tolerance among the student body is the first time we really see him take an active role in standing up for a cause and using that popularity and likeability of his for good.

[hotmess-exe]

I FUCKING HATE ERIC ADAMS. ERIC ADAMS IS A GIGANTIC PIECE OF SHIT AND I WISH ONLY TERRIBLE THINGS UPON HIM

[series-and-movies]

Sex education really is the best show out there huh? They’re dealing with all these important topics and they’re not glossing over it or stereotyping and it’s all so real - i mean Adam having issues talking about his feelings, lgbtq+ representation all around and supportiveness too, cal using they/them pronouns and Jackson falling head over heals for them, realistic depictions of discrimination and homophobia, relationship issues, older parents, disability awareness, showing what it’s like being poor while going to school, mental health issues are talked about and destigmatised, supportive friendships, actual healthy and good advice about all of the above.

It’s not just about sex, it’s not just funny. This show is so much more and it should be appreciated as the masterpiece that it absolutely is.

[ziracona]

Mission success Saw III watched, good night had, two absolute soulless bastards dead, and the world righter for it. Now we just have to decide if 4 is worth watching, or we’re just doing scenes.

[wearebackbagels]

Don’t imagine the SAS in highschool, dont do it, DON’T-! ........I did it.

The principal's son David Stirling who wants to live up to the family name but struggles in school.

And his rowdy crush Eve.

Paddy is flying in and out of juvie more frequently than he is shagging his long-haired boyfriend.

And Augustin is not too happy about either of those things.

This is the second time Dave gets busted while smoking weed by the dumpsters.

Reggie-best-in-the-football-team-Seekings.

Straight A-student Johnny.

Mike before puberty hit him like a fucking train. All the girls( and most boys) at school have a crush on him.

Jock Lewis is secretly making bombs with stuff he steals from the lab in the school cellar.

Pat Riley is good with a sewing machine and works part time as a police officer though there are some who claims they have seen him smoking weed with Dave Kershaw by the dumpsters, but those are just rumours ofc.

And what list of mine would be complete without my Trash prince Walter Essner aka Mr Real Thing having beef with someone in the mens-room( or something, I have no fucking clue what is about to go down here)

Actors, media and characters. Connor Swindells - Sex Education ( Adam Groff)

Sofia Boutella - Atomic Blonde (Delphine)

Jack O’Connell - Starred Up ( Eric Love)

César Domboy - The Walk          ( Jeff/Jean)

Bobby Schofield - The Walk-In   ( Matthew Hankinson)

Theo Barklem Biggs - The First Team( Petey Brooks)

Jacob McCarthy - The Drummer And the Keeper (Christopher)

Tom Glynn Carney -  The Last Post (Tony Armstrong)

Alfie Allen - How to Build A Girl (John Kite)

Jacob Ifan - Cuffs (Jake Vickers)

Paul Boche - Uns Geht es Gut( The blond)

I seriously couldn’t find anything with Donal Finn( Eoin) or Corin Silva( Almonds). They are basically in nothing outside of SAS. Same goes for Bill Fraser, sorry @adowbaldwin​

FUNNY STUFF IN THE COMMENTS

[i-cannot-live-without-coffee]

Sex Education S3 Thoughts

Adam biking out of nowhere and scaring Otis and Eric killed me.

"Maeve, that's Steve."

Poor Cal was just baptized by fire.

“You’re going to ruin my makeup.” “I will ruin you.”

Cal’s face when they tore down the toilet. Man. That hit hard.

“School’s meant to prepare you for the real world.” Bull.

“Your stories are so special, Aimes.”

“Picasso, obsessed with dicks and vaginas.”

“It’s a piece of history.” “It’s a wall of penises.” “Okay, but not just any penises. It’s a wall of historical penises.”

Dua Saleh deserves a BAFTA for being able to say “It’s a wall of historical penises” without bursting into hysterics.

“HOW WAS LUNCH FROM THE OTHER SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDE????”

Ruby’s heart pants are amazing.

I love Aimee’s accent. Northern English accents are so cute.

Elsie got big.

“Fucklord of the Universe.”

“Why are you turned around?” “It makes me think better.”

Rakhee Thakrar’s so adorable.

“It’s my new look. I call it ‘Pimp on Fire.’"

Seriously, I cannot fucking get over "Pimp on Fire."

Isaac was so cute in Ep 3.

Oh, the Jonathan storyline. That hurt.

Shoutout to Sex Education for treating the grief for a pet as valid.

When did Moordale become a Catholic school? Because that was basically my experience, and it wasn't fun or helpful.

I love Rahim's bluntness.

How dare they make Lily feel bad about her weirdness?

I can't believe Jean told Mr. Groff to jerk off.

FUCK SHIT UP, VIV!

Jackson is dressed as a vagina.

"Oh, this school..."

Poor Cal.

Yeah, Cal!!!!

Mr. Hendricks is awesome this season.

"We could be each other's mums."

Cal's "Holy FUCK!!!"

I love Cal.

"I think Goat might be a lesbian."

Miss Sands Supremacy

Holy shit holy shit holy shit

[ceci1998]

Rant about Eric and Adam’s relationship this season, because they were done so dirty and I need to get it off my chest

I knew this relationship wasn’t going to be smooth sailing, and I was actually really looking forward to see how the writes dealt with the past bullying and the contrast between Eric who is so out and proud and Adam who is struggling to coming to terms with his sexuality. And we got the latter but in the worst possible way, whiiiich brings me to how they handled Eric’s character this season. He used to be my favourite character, but the writers did my boy so dirty imo… like yeah he is still his usually charming and confident self, but in his relationship with Adam he was so selfish?? Like already in episode 2 he gets mad at Adam for not being ready to have sex. That is so fucked up, why would you pressure your boyfriend into having sex and coming out to his family by threatening a break-up? And in the story it’s treated like Eric’s in the right while Adam’s in the wrong, which also feels sooo wrong.

And then there’s the godawful cheating plotline, seriously why does every gay tv relationship need to have a cheating plotline?! The absolute cheapest way of creating conflict and here its almost treated as a ‘stage of development’ for Eric, as by kissing another guy he realises that Adam is holding him down or whatever. But jfc, writers, could he not have come that realisation without cheating? Like how are we supposed to root for Eric, when he outright tells his boyfriend (that he supposedly love) that the kiss felt good and that he doesn’t even regret it? He also didn’t even seem that bothered by the break-up?? S1/S2 Eric would never, I’m just saying. Anyway, a lot of the conflict throughout the season felt contrived, and I hated that they ended on such a *final* note. My heart just breaks for Adam, I know he’s an oddball and has a lot of problems, but he really tried his hardest and he was so in love, and for him to be cheated on and broken up with… I need someone to convince me there is an upside to the way their relationship was handled, because right now I only see bad writing.

[smnthwrd]

⚠️sex education season 3 spoilers ahead⚠️

(also don't read this if you're a maeve x otis stan because you will not like what you see)

I can't believe we were taunted with a couple as iconic as otis and ruby and maeve and isaac just for them to go oh big surprise-- it was maeve and otis all along whoop dee doo 😒 like seriously they were just so bland after all of the options we were presented with. And i LOVED them in season 1 and 2, but after 3 i just feel like they had both changed so much it didn't even feel right anymore like it felt like they literally spent so much time developing two different love stories for them both, like actually really building them, giving us ruby opening up her life to otis and even saying i love you?? Giving us that BEAUTIFUL tender scene with isaac and maeve?? just to toss them to the side and go whoops it was the most predictable couple all along! What the fuck. I used to love them but now i think i might...actually...be...a Maeve x otis anti???? 😳

And don't even get me started on Eric and Adam i literally can't believe that they couldn't let them be happy for just ONE season. Like just one??? One season?? All this strife and hardship to get together and we can't have one season?? Son of a bitch

[galactichoneybee92]

Disorganized Thoughts on Sex Education Season 3

I binge watched the entirety of season 3 on Friday, and after sitting with it for a couple days, I have composed myself enough to offer some thoroughly disorganized thoughts on what I’ve seen. 

     While I did enjoy many things about this season, I don’t understand the people who claim it was the strongest. In fact, I believe that it was the weakest. I don’t know what exactly happened during the delay, but I swear they have to have lost staff. Writers, perhaps editors? Whoever usually reins things in a bit, keeps the show grounded, and everyone in character. Whoever had that job, they’re either gone, or they’ve just stopped giving a fuck which, while relatable, is unfortunate in regards to this show. Now what do I mean by that? Let me elaborate:

1. This season was gross. And I don’t mean in general, like I didn’t like it. No, I mean that the writers decided that being sexually explicit wasn’t funny enough and decided to add just a fuck-ton of fart jokes and toilet humor. And I get it, okay? This show prides itself on being crass. But you can be crass without being disgusting. I acknowledge that this comes entirely down to personal preference, but I can’t stand toilet humor and I feel like this season really ramped it up. Every episode was someone farting or talking about shit, or that god forsaken thrice cursed bus scene. Sex doesn’t gross me out, talk about sex all fucking day I don’t care, but I don’t need to watch an extended scene of someone digging their own shit out of a bus toilet in a sock and chucking it out the window onto someone’s car. And even just smaller things, like Aimee talking about the flour constipating her or her taking a massive shit in Jean’s toilet when she and Maureen were there. Those scenes weren’t necessary for the plot in any way, which leads me to believe they were just there because someone thought they were funny and if that’s you’re thing go off, but it most definitely isn’t mine. 

2. Ruby and Otis. And more importantly, what was the point of Ruby and Otis? Now don’t get me wrong, I like Ruby as a character and I found their relationship interesting. And I think that it would have been even more interesting if the writers had devoted more time to properly developing it- Ruby was getting better as a person but she wasn’t there yet. I liked it once Otis started standing up for himself more, and demanding respect in the relationship and as she started to actually care for him she did come to treat him more respectfully. I think with more time they could have been really good. But they didn’t get that time- she said she loved him and they didn’t even work through that fiasco before he was kissing Maeve at a gas station. Overall it had a lot of potential but the way they played it left me just sitting here like...why? Like from a narrative standpoint what was even the purpose? Because from where I’m sitting it really only served as yet another roadblock standing between Otis and Maeve and even though I shipped them like CRAZY in season 1 and 2 the constant unnecessary roadblocks are getting a little old. Which leads me to my next point...

3. Why was Maeve and Otis so unsatisfying? That’s not actually a rhetorical question, I can tell you: Because the writers put so little effort into what is supposed to be the main couple on the show. I feel like they put more effort into keeping them apart and then when it comes time to put them together they’re just kind of like NOW KISS, they only talk like once after and then they ship Maeve off to America. Now I’ve heard rumors that Emma Mackey might not want to return to the show for season 4 so if I had to guess at all of this I would say that both this point and the last was a sloppy attempt to cover their asses in the event that they can’t get her to sign back on. If she does return, they can explore the relationship between her and Otis in season 4. If she doesn’t, they’re probably going to put him back with Ruby. But they couldn’t just write her off without at least touching on the relationship they spent the past 2 seasons building, even though Otis and Maeve barely interact in this season, which is frankly another reason why it felt so shoddy. They spent exponentially more time talking to other people and then half the time when Otis was talking to her he was super cringe. 

     Overall, despite loving their relationship initially, the characters have changed so much from their original dynamic, and have interacted so little, that I really don’t even know what’s pulling these characters together. It’s disappointing to admit that I’m kind of over it but honestly even the writers don’t feel invested. it kind of feels like they put them together because the audience expected it and after 3 seasons of anticipation the payoff was generally underwhelming. 

4. Otis. Just...Otis. I understand that Otis was introduced as being a very nice helpful character in season one. He was the quintessential good guy. And then in season 2 he got to explore being a douche for a bit- which is fine. He is a teenager and he was going through some shit. But I really felt that by the end of season 2 he should have resolved that particular plot point. And he was a little better in season 3 I guess? But he didn’t really progress until the end of this season and from a writing standpoint I feel like they really dragged that out for too long. 

5. What’s with this show and it’s hard on for cheating? Like seriously, why does almost every relationship have some kind of infidelity. Like, were Otis and Ruby officially broken up when he kissed Maeve? Maeve certainly hadn’t broken up with Isaac, and this was almost directly on the heels of their very emotional sex scene. There was the issue with Jean and Jakob last season, and Eric cheating on Rahim with Adam. And then Eric (for some reason) cheating on Adam this season with random Nigerian dude whose name I can’t remember. Just...why is this a thing? 

     But also can we just talk about how weird the break up was? And out of left field? Like they literally spent the whole season developing their relationship, and then they get to Nigeria and after hiding the whole time he is subtly able to talk about Adam to his grandmother. And he sounds so proud, and so nice when he’s doing so, and not at all like he’s planning to end this wonderful relationship he’s describing. And then when he gets back, guilty after cheating on said boyfriend (like he should be) he asks Adam, seemingly as a test, if he would go out to a club with him. And Adam says no because that isn’t his scene and like...Eric knows that isn’t his scene. But at the same time, I feel like if Eric had sat him down and been like “You don’t have to wear makeup or dress outlandishly, just come to the club with me because it’s important to me” I really think Adam would have gone. And if the clothes and make-up were a dealbreaker like...why? You know who you’re dating. And while wanting him to tell his mom isn’t an overwhelmingly outrageous request, when you start getting into his physical appearance then that’s just actually trying to change him as a person and that’s just a really shitty thing to do. 

6. I promise there will be some positives in this list at some point but before that...what the fuck Eric? Like, I understand that Eric wants to get out there and explore his options, find someone more comfortable doing the things that he wants to go do. That’s realistic I guess, your high school relationships don’t work out and just because Adam came out for him he still isn’t obligated to stay in a relationship with him. But from a fictional narrative standpoint? What the fuck is this? Adam and Eric were one of the most popular ships on the show. They have been foreshadowed since season one, and had so so much effort put into developing them both as characters. Adam has come such a long way. They have brought him so far out of him comfort zone that Adam in season 3 is almost a completely different person to Adam in season 1. They spent so much of this season further developing the relationship they established last season, and for what? To break them up at the very end? WHY? 

7. Following on the heels of point 6, Aimee and Steve. They didn’t need to break up. I understand the direction the writers were taking this- Aimee wants to be single for a while to fully process her trauma and get to know her own body again. And that’s valid. I just don’t like it because I very strongly suspect that she will have a new love interest next season and that all her stuff about being single isn’t going to be shown. It will all happen off screen during whatever time skip they employ between seasons and then they’re going to use the fact that she is single to introduce a new more dramatic love interest for her since golden retriever boy Steve wasn’t interesting enough for them. Maybe that’s just me being cynical but if anyone can come out of season 3 NOT feeling a little cynical it would probably be a miracle. 

8. A positive! Finally a positive! I love the relationship between Adam and Rahim. Do I want them to date? Not particularly. I wouldn’t be mad if it happens, but I really just like them as like awkward begrudging friends. Some of my favorite scenes this season were the interactions between the two of them (Once again, the disgusting bus ride notwithstanding) I like Rahim a lot more when he isn’t interrupting my ship (which is a habit of mine. I liked Ola a lot more once she broke up with Otis) 

9. I don’t think Viv was out of character. Some people have been saying that she was, but I don’t think so. She has always been ambitious and even Jackson understand that about her in the show. And even when she was working for Hope and carrying out her rules, she was never an antagonist because she never gave up her personal morals to do it. For example, when Hope had them divided into boy and girl lines, Jackson asked her where Cal should go. She told him that boys went to the left and girls went to the right but as soon as Cal was like “Im not a boy or a girl,” Viv was immediately like, “ Oh! Right! Let me ask Hope.” She approached the situation in a way that made it clear that she recognized this issue as a legitimate problem and when she went to Hope it wasn’t framed like “This person is being an issue refusing to choose,” but instead like “We didn’t account for this possibility, that was our bad. How should we fix it?” Later on, on the class trip, Viv even lied to Hope and told her everything was fine because she didn’t want to get anyone in trouble. Viv took the opportunities presented to her, but I never interpreted it as her being an antagonist in any way. 

10. I love that Viv and Jackson remained friends, and I love that Viv has her sexy long-distance boyfriend who sexts about wheat XD Her sexting was one of my favorite scenes- well written, laugh out loud hilarious. No complaints. Sexy boyfriend was indeed very sexy and honestly, Viv absolutely deserves him. 

11. Mr. Groff better apologize to Adam next season, or at the very least have any kind of fucking conversation with his son at all or else why the fuck did I watch SO MANY scenes developing him as a sympathetic character? They could have spent that time developing ANYONE, but instead we were focused on him so like...I’m going to need some kind of payoff. Make it relevant

12. I want more bonding scenes between Adam and Maureen. I love Maureen- I love her friendship with Jean and I love how she always chooses her son over  her estranged husband (as she should) I especially love her very loving and supportive relationship with Adam, even though Adam is terrible at communication. It’s a self indulgent wish, I’d just like to see more. 

13. Isaac. I made many posts after the season 2 release, about how much I despised Isaac. Unlike Ola, I find that I didn’t have a complete change of heart but I don’t hate him AS MUCH as I did before. I still don’t like him though and while you might think “Yeah but you hate anyone who stands in the way of Otis and Maeve” no. This is historically accurate and yet, this season? Not true. For example, I don’t hate Ruby. Do I think her inclusion in the story was handled poorly in a way that made the entire plot point unnecessary? Yes I do. I also feel that way about Isaac, but less so because I feel like the relationship between him and Maeve deepening was better foreshadowed and was kind of the natural conclusion given the events of the previous season. As a character though, I still don’t really like him, and after 2 seasons of him I don’t think it has anything to do with him interfering with Maeve’s relationship with Otis- I just legitimately don’t like him. And I don’t like him with Maeve. I think the biggest irritant this season was the way that, after confessing about deleting the message he was like “yeah I fucked up but only because I like you so much, just forgive me” And then at one point I believe I remember Maeve apologizing to him for her reaction to everything. But then when he found out that she kissed Otis (admittedly a shitty thing to do) he got so mad and like, held a fucking grudge about it. And I get it, he has a right to be mad, but also boy you were the one groveling like 2 episodes ago get over yourself. They both fucked up in different ways but he acts like he has the moral high ground all the time and it gets really annoying. I don’t know, maybe I’m letting my general dislike of the character color my perception of events, but this show has managed to change my opinion on characters before but it still hasn’t made me like him so I think it’s just not going to. 

14. What the hell were they trying to do with Hope? Like legitimately, what? Because I can’t quite figure it out. And that’s mostly because I feel like they were trying to make her a nuanced and sympathetic villain, but they broke a cardinal rule- To make a villain sympathetic you must also ensure that nothing they do is inherently irredeemable. For example, principal Groff. He was a grade A dick for the past 2 seasons but I still feel that, now that we have a sympathetic backstory, if handled properly he could still come back from this. He can see the error of his ways and if he works really really hard to make amends to his family he could perhaps have his character turned around. In Hope’s case however, I would argue that they did makes her nuanced, but failed to make her sympathetic because as a character she went too far. If they had stuck to her just being a general tyrant of a headmaster - enforcing strict rules and regulations but doing so out of insurmountable pressure from her own bosses -  and then softened us towards the character by showing us her willingness to help Maeve get a scholarship, her troubled marriage, and her inability to conceive, it could have worked. The trouble is when they brought in her racism and general bigotry. Those weren’t flaws brought on by stress, those were deeply rooted character flaws that the character isn’t going to overcome because by the end of the season the character hasn’t even admitted them to herself. The issues were addressed by others, but not by Hope herself, leaving me to believe that the character herself still views them as a nonissue. I would be very surprised if she even appears in season 4 and moreso if they manage to even half-way redeem her. I’m relatively certain we won’t see her again, which makes me question the effort put into her character development. 

15. I like Jakob as a character, I don’t like him as a love interest for Jean, but I LOVE him as a father figure for Otis. It’s very conflicting because I want him to stay in Otis’s life, but I don’t like him as a romantic interest for Jean. also it’s pretty clear he isn’t Joy’s father so that’s going to be an awkward fucking conversation. If she even tells him. The way the show is going I kind of feel like she won’t, or will at least put it off for as long as possible. 

16. I want more interaction between Otis and Jean. Positive interaction, not just her being intrusive or Otis being a little bitch. I like their mother-son dynamic when they’re getting along so I just generally want more of it. 

17. Adam. Adam has become my favorite character in this show and I just generally want more of him and his relationships with others. I love his relationship with his mother but I want more if him and Emily, and him and Ola and now him and Ruby. I want to see him and Ruby discussing the Kardashians. I want him to train Madam and enter her in more competitions and just ultimately grow his social circle. Get all the love and support for god’s sake this boy needs it. 

Im sure there are plenty of things I’m forgetting and you can ask me about them if you like but for now it’s late and I’m tired. 

[queer-and-dear-books]

Title: More Happy Than Not

Author: Adam Silvera

Genre: YA Fiction | Friendship | Drama | (Low) Sci-fi | LGBTQ+

Content Warnings: Homophobia | Bullying | Bashing | Death

Overall Rating: 8.7/10

Personal Opinion: I don’t think I can summarize this book without spoiling it so I’ll just say, if you want your heart ripped out, then this is the book for you. The angst is supreme. Adam Silvera makes you fall in love with his unique and real characters before forcing you through the five stages of heartbreak in this heartbreakingly beautiful debut. However, if you want a happy ending, then you want the version of the book with the new epilogue that was written years later. Trust me, it makes the heartbreak worth it.

Do I Own This Book? Nope.

Spoilers Below For My Likes & Dislikes:

Likes:

- Firstly, let’s talk about that fucking plot twist, holy shit. It’s wild because there were hints to it but it also wasn’t obvious at all because we had no idea that the Leteo procedure could be undone until a few pages before it happened. But once we saw all those memories flooding through Aaron, all of the reactions of those around him suddenly made sense. His mother wanted to get rid of his dad’s things even though he had such good memories of his dad (fabricated). Eric, his brother, looking alarmed at the fact that Aaron was going to his girlfriend’s house to have sex and telling their mom that he did that (worried because Aaron was lying to himself). Genevieve, his girlfriend, not saying “I love you” back when he did (because she knew he was gay). Collin getting furious at Aaron and running from the Comic Book Asylum (because the guy he wanted cut off contact with him with no explanation). Once we saw all his missing memories, all the little things suddenly made so much sense to us. Like Gen saying “I’m losing you again” when he met Thomas. It all made sense and it was almost magical how the pieces all fell into place.

- Some of the plot twist stuff really got to me like the Dark Alternates part. It had been Aaron’s and Collin’s thing but Aaron didn’t remember it. He never got into it, according to him. The way it meant so much to him and Collin though was some real powerful stuff and I actually enjoyed seeing their whole relationship play out the way it did even though I knew it didn’t end well.

- Thomas is such a good boy? He’s so in tune with his emotions and he isn’t shy about expressing affection to his male friends. And this is a straight guy! That’s kind of hard to believe. His closeness with Aaron did make it seem like he was interested in Aaron romantically but once Aaron started insisting on Thomas’s sexuality being gay, that was the point I knew he was being an unreliable narrator and just projecting. I get it but damn, it hurt to see it go down the way it did. Still, it was a necessary pain for Me-Crazy to witness their affection and then barrel into Aaron, making all those locked memories unwind. No but seriously, Thomas giving eyes to the happy face scar, him unabashedly telling Aaron he was his favorite person, him supporting Aaron’s sexuality without hesitation and even after Aaron kissed him? Where do you find straight men like him because damn, he’s truly an icon.

- Genevieve is also good. On a lesser scale but she really did care for Aaron and I do kind of understand why she stayed even though she knew he was not into her the way she was into him. Because he told her he could love her after he got the procedure. And she just wanted him so much that she believed him. He used her as his beard and she used him to feel loved and they shouldn’t have and they apologized to one another for it and I respect their friendship so much.

- I respect Freddy too. He was not involved in the homophobic attack and he stopped hanging with Brendan and the gang after they hurt Aaron. He was also the first to apologize to Aaron after he left Leteo. He was there in the new epilogue, grown up and ready to be his friend again. Like that’s true growth, in my opinion.

- Thomas was also right about Aaron’s mom, she really is the coolest. When he came out to her, she encouraged him to come out to his dad and was ready to protect him when his dad threatened him. She was ready to be a human shield from his so-called friends who beat the shit out of him. And I felt so bad for her when Eric called out the things she did wrong but it was necessary. It was also necessary for Eric to be called out too because he was negligent and complicit to the casual homophobia that his brother suffered. And I think I really gained a lot of respect for Eric for being there for Aaron after the bashing incident. He apologized for all the shit that he didn’t do and vowed to do more for Aaron. And he did it.

- Aaron’s oblivious crush on Thomas was tragic but also kind of adorable. The fact that he gave Thomas a Buzz Lightyear toy on his birthday was so sweet because he clearly paid attention. He knew Thomas was hurt by his dad leaving him forever after he said he was going to buy that toy for Thomas. And then they played 2 Truths and 1 Lie and Aaron and Thomas knew each other so well. They cared and they listened to each other. I love their friendship a lot too. And I’m glad Aaron is trying to accept that his two best friends are a couple because that’s what you do when you love them. You love their happiness too.

- Also the repression made no sense to me at first but then the unwinding happened and I was shook. I was like, “There is no way Aaron had no idea he was gay before Thomas” and the fact was, he didn’t. He always knew on some level ever since he was a little kid. He was into “girly” things, he liked choosing girl characters in video games, he crushed on Brendan so hard he wanted to give him homemade comics and got jealous when Brendan got his first blowjob. He knew he was gay but he repressed it for real with Leteo. Hell, even his crush on his “old babysitter” Evangeline was fabricated and I respect Evangeline for going to check on him for real like that. Everything I didn’t like and everything I didn’t understand in this book made sense when the twist happened! That’s some good writing right there.

- I personally think the 2020 epilogue was sorely needed. I respect Silvera so much as a novelist. He said he wrote the book for himself and the end for us, the readers, and I truly believe him. Because seeing Aaron fully recover from his amnesia and find a chance at happiness with openly MLM Jordan Gonzalez Jr. is just all I needed to know. That he will be happy someday. For real. 

Dislikes:

- Sigh. I brought this upon myself. Adam Silvera has a reputation in the gay lit world for tearing out the hearts of his readers and I knew there would be tragedy in this book and I still read it. It hurt a lot to see Aaron suffer so much. How much he hated himself and wanted to change his sexuality. He forced himself to change and it made him suffer more. He got beat up by his own friends, nearly killed. He got jumped on the subway and not a single damn person helped him. He fell in love with a straight boy and (separately) a closet case who chose a girl that he’d impregnated over him. He got antirogade amnesia because of Me-Crazy. His dad killed himself. Like how much tragedy can you pack into a kid before it becomes too much? It hurt me so bad, I just wanted him to be happy.

- Him and Thomas had a lot of on-page chemistry. They make really good friends and I respect that a lot. But it’s also mildly frustrating that they didn’t end up together. I get Thomas is straight but his interactions with Aaron and undying loyalty did make the two of them seem like a perfect fit. But I suppose I can say that about a lot of ships. I don’t know, I just kind of wish there’d been more on-page chemistry between Thomas and Genevieve if they were going to be the true endgame. At least Aaron’s petty jealousy and hardcore projecting made sense to me. Like it wasn’t annoying that he did it because I get it. It’s hard to be happy for two people when you’re in love with one of them and now they’re together and they never would have met without you. I hope he gets the love he needs and so obviously craves from Jordan. He has been through too much. And the same goes for Jordan too.

- Fuck Me-Crazy and his bigoted ass. Fuck Brendan and his claim that Aaron chose to be gay. Fuck those two random homophobes on the subway who attacked two teens for just bumping knees on the train. Fuck everyone else on that train who did nothing to help when it happened. Fuck Aaron’s dad for literally everything he did wrong. And I’m glad Aaron got to kick Brendan in the balls at least.

- I respect Silvera a lot. And his reasoning for writing this book being that he didn’t understand why people thought gayness was a choice is understandable. It isn’t a choice. You can choose to date a girl like Aaron did. You can choose to have sex with her. You can choose to hold her hand and kiss her on the lips but you can’t choose to be happy with her if you’re simply not attracted to her that way. It’s so frustrating that people think gays choose to be gay because Silvera is right, why would we deliberately choose the harder life? The life that would make people hate us for literally no good reason? The life that gets us beat up and spat at and screamed at? Why would any of us actually choose that path? I understand why Silvera wrote this book. I get that it was for him. But I am mildly traumatized. I don’t know what the Bronx is like but it’s wild to me that this is set in New York City in the 2010s because holy shit, the ignorance was palpable.

- Adam Silvera, as a writer, has my utmost respect. He is talented and eloquent and knows how to capture a reader’s attention. That being said, I hate his content. It’s so goddamn depressing. That is no fault of Silvera, he and I just do not align aesthetically and that is okay. But my god, do I feel so depressed after reading this. The dark side of fiction really is not for me unfortunately. Way too much angst.

[starlightsailfish]

Tape, Puzzle Piece and Hello Zepp for the Saw asks~

Tape: Which movie is your personal favorite of the whole franchise?

SAW IV! It's got Mark, Peter, Lindsey, and Rigg being their usual sexy selves and both subplots are lots of fun to follow! I love Hoffman and Rigg's relationship and Hoffman being a normal dude, Jill's interogation scenes ("aw Jill no. no!" Classic), whatever the hell is wrong with Strahm I love every scene he's in and how pushy and snappy and pretty he is.

The whole subplot with Art and Eric is probably the weakest part but hey at least Hoffman is there with his tits out. I also forget about this movie's traps a lot because, compared to 3 and 5, they just aren't that impressive. Also why didn't we get the theatrical ending it is so much better at building the energy of Hoffman's reveal???

Puzzle Piece: Favorite trap and why?

Ohhh this one is tough. The Rack has a special place in my heart because it was the first SAW trap I saw on youtube and it fucked me up at the ripe age of 13! :) It would be great if slow-ass-motherfucking Jeff would HURRY UP.

The Cube and Reverse Bear Trap 2.0 are BANGING because we LOVE seeing people survive in genius ways plus head-traps are just really great because of that freedom to move adds to the terror of imminent death. Also it's Peter and Mark being sexy so???

And then there's the Acid Needle trap which is visually so disgusting and unique from all other traps we love a good chemical-based trap!

Hello Zepp: Favorite twist of any of the movies?

Ough it's a hard tie between Saw 1 and Saw 3D. Zep's tape, the pan to Jigsaw waking up, and Adam's screams are SO ICONIC and left me just sitting there for a good 10 mins after just absorbing it all.3D was such a crap movie but the reveal of Lawrence being an apprentice the WHOLE TIME while Hoffman gets his ass kicked around is sooooooooo GOOD and the series ending where it all began is so poetic and makes the movie worth it for that alone.

Honorable mentions go to Daniel being in "a safe place" because that's just a silly little prank :) and 4's theatrical ending because Hoffman sexily unstrapping himself and rising from his chair is so POWERFUL seriously why did they remove that??? Now he just kinda pops ups behind Rigg and that's just not as cool. :(

Thank you for the asks!!

[lots-of-little-pink-clouds]

Choice of Games Twitter is posting pictures of the characters in Parliament of Knives, and I just... Why are they all hot?

Seriously, I would kill for Eden Corliss if she told me to while looking at me like I’m the scum of the earth. Jordan is fucking adorable, Alisha Grey is Amanda Chastain but in red (don’t @ me, it’s true), and Michel looks so good w/ his shirt unbuttoned like that (boils? idc I found Perry attractive too).

These freaking VTM games man, they’re killing me lol

(Seriously. Like. Lettow? Handsome eagle man! Dove? Break my spine! Julian? That smile! Elena? Tattoos! Invidia Caul? I’ll give you Vani, and I fucking love Vani! Vani? Talk science to me! Pattermuster? Those arms! D’Espine? Ghoul me and do your Protean thing! Edouard? Snake man! Chiara? Fuck, I’d come back from the dead for you! Aila? Step on me! Adam! Eric! Monroe! Perry! Kyra! Salem! Amanda Chastain! Even fucking Gabriel Jayfield! I can’t handle this man lol)